#Special Cecilia
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Beck and Jason Falkner dancing to Tracy Chapman's "Fast Car" in Australia, February 2018
Video by gothictropic via Instagram Stories
#beck#beck hansen#2018#colors#videos#jason falkner#beck in australia#so sweet <3#shared by Cecilia who was the touring guitarist with Jason during the Colors tour#Idk if Ryan (Beck's assistant) ever shared the video you can see him filming here#this was a special request!
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Special Holiday message from Dudepow!!
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"Sono nata cieca. A volte sono triste, ma poi penso ai ragazzi meno fortunati di me, quelli che mi prendono in giro. A loro è andata peggio, sono nati senza cuore."
Cecilia Camellini, ex campionessa europea, mondiale e paralimpica.
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all you need is love (and salt)
happy valentine's day!!!! <33
fandom: the wayhaven chronicles pairing: ava du mortain x f!detective (cecilia beck) words: rating: general
read it on ao3
She had circled the date multiple times in red ink on her little desk calendar. February 14th, a momentous holiday for lovers and to her, for the last nine-hundred-something years, an ordinary Tuesday or whatever day it happened to fall on.
Ava drummed her fingers on the surface of her desk. The only time she had even realized Valentine’s Day had come and passed was when Farah came back with bags full of half-priced candy that she swore would last her until candy went on sale again after Easter—it never did.
That prospect on the so-called holiday changed once Ava landed herself something she had thought she wouldn’t have to worry about. A girlfriend. And just her luck, it happened to be a girlfriend who adored Valentine’s Day.
Since the end of January, Cecilia’s apartment had been full of vases of flowers and various heart-shaped decorations. Ava swore she decorated more for this than Christmas which was saying a lot. For a virtually unimportant holiday, the woman even had heart-shaped plates in various shades of reds and pinks she had Ava help her bring from storage so she could use over February.
“I just love Valentine’s Day,” Cecilia sighed dreamily as she replaced her normal plates with the festive ones. “I think it’s my favorite. I just love love.”
From that moment, Ava knew she was in trouble.
“You’re still worried about this?” Farah chided as she followed Nat into the room who at least had the decency to knock before entering.
Ava turned in her chair, annoyed at the invasion of her bedroom. She thought that maybe she might find some privacy in her personal space, but clearly, that wasn’t the case.
Nat’s help had been enlisted before in the matter of what to do about Valentine’s Day. She was the one that had actually dated people over the years and was more knowledgeable about human traditions. Ava always thought of being interested in the human world had the equivalent of watching a couple of ants interact. Unimportant and fleeting given how short mortal lives tended to be. Then she just had to go and fall in love with a human so now she begrudgingly knows things like who Doja Cat is and that teenagers no longer aspire to be doctors but instead want to blow up on the Tiktok. She still wasn’t exactly sure how shaking one’s posterior meant getting rich, but that was neither here nor there.
“Yes,” she growled, angrily scrolling through an article titled 50 Valentine Gifts for Her. Ava should’ve clicked off upon seeing the first thing on the list which was matching His and Hers shirts. “Excuse me for trying to give my girlfriend the perfect Valentine’s Day.”
Farah plopped down on the edge of Ava’s bed. “Why are you looking at sites meant for middle-aged men? You think you’re going to find your answer there?”
“At least it’s a start,” Nat tried to add to quench Ava’s visible annoyance.
Ava slammed her laptop shut, burying her face in her hands to muffle a groan. “This is ridiculous. Human holidays are absurd.”
“You just hate fun,” Farah teased, picking at the end of a bright purple nail.
“Why don’t you just ask Cecilia what she wants?” Nat asked, resting a hand on the back of her desk chair.
“Because then she knows that I’m clueless and terrible at this!”
Nat pursed her lips. “What are her favorite flowers?”
“Lilies!” Farah yelled before Ava had a chance to answer. “And you should get one of those stuffed bears that are like huge!” She jumped back onto her feet to show them both about how tall the bear was. “You know, with a card that says I’m sorry I suck at being romantic. Here’s a giant bear. I love you, Cecilia.” Farah then proceeded to turn her back and make kissing noises, her arms wrapping around herself and hands groping her back.
Nat wrinkled her nose before turning her back to Farah, stepping in front of Ava’s line of sight of her. “What Farah is trying to say is get Cecilia her favorite flowers, maybe put them in a nice vase to match her stuff. Why don’t you two do something together? Cook her favorite meal or take her to a museum.”
“No!” Farah cried from behind them.
Ava looked down at her sheet of ideas and ran a hand over her hair, the loose ends tickling the skin exposed by her tank top. “I can cook.”
Farah groaned in despair while Nat smiled cheerfully.
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
When Cecilia opened the door to her apartment, she was immediately hit with the smell of fish.
She covered her nose with the sleeve of her sweater as she blinked in confusion. It wasn’t that she didn’t like fish, it was just that she wasn’t expecting it. She hadn’t bought any type of fish in ages because of the way it stinks up her little apartment and having little windows that barely opened made the task of ridding the stench even harder.
“Hello?” she called out in confusion, dropping her purse before venturing further into the apartment. There were only a few people who had spare keys to her apartment so the options on who it was were limited. But the last thing she ever expected to find was Ava du Mortain in her kitchen cooking.
It accounted for the fishy smell as the sound of salmon sizzling in a pan filled the space of the kitchen as she stood in the doorway. Ava clearly hadn’t heard her come in, which was unusual. Normally, she could tell where Cecilia was from outside the building. But the intense look of concentration on her face acted as an explanation.
The entire thing was an abnormality.
Cecilia gently set the package she was holding on the counter and approached, wrapping her arms around Ava’s broad torso. “Are you my housewife now?” she teased, kissing the shoulder that didn’t have a towel slung over it.
Ava jumped a bit, startled at her appearance. She recovered quickly, turning to hold Cecilia properly. And when she did, she bent down and gave her the sweetest kiss. “Happy Valentine’s Day, my love,” she murmured, her voice wonderfully low and husky.
She smiled. “You remembered!”
Blonde brows furrowed. “Why wouldn’t I?” she asked, almost sounding offended.
Cecilia shrugged, moving to lean on the counter beside the stove. “It’s a human holiday. I know you don’t celebrate them.”
“Well,” Ava started and cupped her cheek, directing Cecilia’s gaze to the tiny round dining table where a vase of rose lilies sat. “I wanted to do it for you.”
She gasped and hurried to the table, immediately smelling the flowers before stumbling upon the card and a box of chocolates. “You got me flowers and chocolate?” she said, nearly bouncing in excitement.
“And I wanted to cook you dinner. But there’s also something in the bedroom for you.” Cecilia raised a brow. “The bedroom?” she said haughtily.
Ava chuckled.
She didn’t wait for an explanation before crossing the living room to stand in the doorway of her room. “Holy shit. It’s huge!”
On the bed sat a teddy bear that had to be close to her height. It was absolutely massive, nearly taking up most of her full-sized mattress. She ran her hand across its fur, noticing how soft it was, and admiring the red ribbon tied in a bow around its neck.
When she stepped out of the bedroom and came back to the kitchen, Ava was smiling a bit shyer than normal. “It was Farah’s idea.”
Cecilia shook her head and grabbed the collar of her shirt, pulling Ava down to kiss her. “God, I love you.” She relished in the way the tips of Ava’s ears reddened.
Dinner was soon done and Ava set her plate in front of where Cecilia sat at the table. She had really gone all out. Candles framing the bouquet as the centerpiece, and an expensive bottle of white wine the worker swore up and down complimented the salmon wonderfully. She had even made sure to dish everything out on Cecilia’s favorite holiday heart-shaped plates.
Cecilia stole one last kiss before Ava stood up. “This looks delicious,” she commented as Ava poured her a glass of wine.
“I hope it tastes okay,” she said, sitting across from her to pour her own glass.
“I’m sure it will.” She smiled and cut into the fish. But when she began to chew, it took everything in her to keep her face the same. Cecilia didn’t know what on earth Ava had done, but it was somehow overpoweringly fishy whilst bland at the same time. “Oh, wow. That is delicious.” She took another bite as Ava watched her expectantly.
Thankfully, she didn’t catch the lie because her shoulders relaxed and a pleased look covered her face.
She hurriedly took a drink of her wine, hoping to chase the taste away.
It was a battle to get through the meal but Cecilia really loved Ava and her gratitude for the attempt made trumped how truly disgusting the food was. Plus, the wine helped ease it all down and Ava seemed happy with herself.
“Oh! Before I forget!” Cecilia jumped up, running to retrieve the package that she had been hiding at the station. She handed it to Ava. “Happy Valentine’s Day.”
Ava looked between her and the parcel for a long second before beginning to open it. Cecilia watched excitedly as she pulled out something in a glass casing. When she flipped it over, her eyes widened. “Cecilia,” she gasped.
“I can’t get you the real thing, but I found this and thought you would like it just as much.” She stayed beside Ava to watch her marvel at the model car encased in the glass.
It was the car she had mentioned to be her “dream car.” A 1965 Jaguar in the most gorgeous shade of green.
Ava turned to look at her wide-eyed. “You remembered?”
“Of course I did, silly.” She kissed her forehead with a giggle. “I commit everything you tell me about yourself to memory because I’m obsessed with you.”
She rolled her eyes, but the smile didn’t disappear from her lips. “Come here.” Ava tugged on Cecilia’s hand to pull her onto her lap, the display car being safely sat on the table. “You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I am undeserving.”
Their foreheads pressed together, noses barely brushing as Cecilia smiled. “Is this a good holiday now, then?”
Ava nodded. “Most definitely. I understand it now,” she whispered before stealing Cecilia’s future words with a kiss.
#valentine's day special#ava du mortain x f!detective#ava du mortain x detective#my writing#ava du mortain#ava x cecilia#oc: cecilia#cecilia beck#twc#the wayhaven chronicles#wayhaven#twc fics#twc a#a du mortain
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U.N. Human Rights Council Demands U.S. End Designation of Cuba as State Sponsor of Terrorism
On June 26, 2024, the U.N. Human Rights Council in Geneva Switzerland issued a declaration signed by 123 countries demanding that the U.S. remove Cuba from the list of countreis that allegedly sponsor terrorism. [1] Cuba’s President, Miguel Diaz-Canel, expressed his gratitude for this expression of support. He also pointed out out that the unjust accusation goes against the fundamental…
#(Special Rapporteur on the negative impact of unilateral coercive measures)#Alena Douhan#Cecilia M. Bailliet (Independent Expert on human rights and international solidarity)#Cuba#Cuba President Miguel Diaz-Canel#George Katrougalos#George Katrougalos (independent Expert on the promotion of a democratic and equitable international order)#U.N. Human Rights Council#U.S. designation of Cuba as "State Sponsor of Terrorism"
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Philcon 2024!
Do you love Science Fiction, Fantasy, or Horror? Are you a Writer, a Gamer, a Costumer, or a Filker? Are you looking for a weekend of distraction in your life? If you’re in the vicinity of Philadelphia- or more specifically, Cherry Hill, New Jersey- there’s an event coming up on November 22 – 24, 2024 that we’d love for you to come check out. If you aren’t already familiar with PHILCON, here’s what you should know: * We started out as a literary-centric SF convention in 1936, but have grown to embrace all mediums of storytelling (movies, television, comics, podcasts, etc) as well as expanding to cover the Fantasy and Horror genres. Most of our participants are authors, and there will be Readings by them and Autograph sessions all throughout the weekend, in addition to their participation on discussion panels. * While many of our Literary panels are about SF, Fantasy, or Horror topics in general, we also have an emphasis on panels discussing the craft side and business sides of writing, for those looking to develop as authors. * One of our content tracks for the weekend is dedicated to Science & Technology itself, not just how it is used in fiction. * We will be screening several movies over the weekend, and Anime will also be shown in our Anime & Animation room at certain times. * There will be Workshops and Demos for Costuming (including "Fabric Manipulation", "How to Make Foam Armor", "Make-up for The Stage", and "A Pox on Patterns!") and Art (including "Using Alcohol Inks", "Block Printing With Your Own Designs", "How to Make A Controlled Color Palette", and "Making Wire-Wrapped Jewelry"), and if you’ve got an outfit you made that you’d like to show off on stage, we’ve got a yearly Costume Contest. * If you are a Filker- or just enjoy listening to other people sing and play music- Philcon has a room dedicated Filk room, and this year’s Musical Guest of Honor is Cecilia Eng. As Cecilia is not often on the east coast, if you’d like to see her play in person, now is an excellent change to do so without flying to the other side of the country. Lynn Gold, another west-coast Filker, will also be joining us this year. There are also Concerts scheduled for Sirens & Liars, Half a Slime Devil, Brenda and Chuck Shaffer-Shiring, and Sara Henya. * Since the Gaming track moved from an upstairs suite to the “Gallery” room on the first floor, it’s had the literal room to expand the number of games it can run, and we’ve got a bevy of them on the schedule for 2024, as well as a bank of games for you to choose from during Open Gaming hours. There's also a LARP Workshop Series being run by Spectacle INK. * Our Artist Guests of Honor for 2024 are Gina Matarazzo and Matthew Stewart. Each will be giving a presentation on our Main Stage on Saturday afternoon, as well as having their art displayed in our Art Show. * Our Principal Speaker for 2024 is MAX GLADSTONE, and we also have Nghi Vo as our Special Guest. Both will be doing Readings, Autograph Sessions, panels, and a main stage Q&A session. An interactive version of our schedule can be found HERE. While a simplified, static overview, organized by track, can be found HERE. Our LinkTree can be found HERE. We would especially value your support this year, as Philcon’s Covid-19 policy in previous years (which required both mandatory masking and proof of vaccination in an attempt to avoid becoming a super-spreader event as several other conventions had) has led to a slow but noticeable decline in attendance. While masking in public spaces is still heavily encouraged, neither proof of vaccination nor masking are required to attend the convention in 2024. We’d love your help in making this year a success, so that we’re in a good position to bring you all something really fantastic for our upcoming 90th anniversary. We’d also love to give you a great weekend right now, for reasons I doubt we need to explain. Here’s to surviving the next few years! ~ Lynati Head of Programming, Philcon 2024
#Philcon#Philcon 2024#Philcon Programming#Philcon Programming 2024#Conventions#SF conventions#Science Fiction#Fantasy#Horror#Filk#Gaming#Writing Workshops
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Reblogs are greatly appreciated !!
"What flowers do you like?"
Wriothesley asks one day, trying to seem nonchalant. Trying to make it look not as obvious that he's already mentally running through a list of Fontanian florists.
But you hm to yourself, frowning. "I... don't know. I've never really received flowers before," you say with a shrug, acting like it's no big deal. Wriothesley, though, has to catch himself before he drops the pen in his hand.
"Never?" He asks with wide eyes, head snapping in your direction, jaw dropping the slightest bit. "None of your past relationships ever got you flowers?"
You shake your head, not really bothered by the fact, and although you're nonchalant about it, Wriothesley immediately feels the gears in his head turn. That mental list of florists runs through his mind at double the speed. His finger absently taps on the wood of his desk, mind racing as he does some rough estimations. Unaware and unsuspecting, you merely go back to perusing the books in his office, running your hands over their worn spines, oblivious to the clench in Wriothesley's jaw and the determined glint in his eye.
A week later, and Wriothesley returns from the surface with a bouquet in his hands. It's nothing too big or ostentatious— that's not really his style. Instead, it's simple in its beauty and easy on the eyes. All sorts of flowers have been included, even ones not native to Fontaine. Cecilias from Mondstadt, Glaze Lillies and Qingxin from Liyue, Padisarahs from Sumeru, and even Fluorescent Flowers from Inazuma's Chinju forest, among others. All arranged by hands more skilled and talent more honed than he could ever hope to achieve.
Wriothesley knocks on your door, heart stuck in his throat, and can't help but laugh a little at how cliche it all looks. Him, standing in front of your door with a bunch of flowers in hand, desperately trying to fight down his blush when he hears a 'coming!' faintly behind your door.
When you swing it open, your greeting is caught in your throat, eyes wide as they behold the blue and white blossoms Wriothesley brought for you.
"What... what's this? What's the occasion?"
But he shakes his head, and at his behest you take the bouquet into your arms, holding it carefully. When you bury your nose among the petals, they smell sweet but not saccharinely overpowering. It's enough to make you want to cry.
"No occasion," Wriothesley says, one hand going to scratch at the back of his neck, his smile shy and bashful. "I just wanted to get them for you. Wanted to be the first person to ever get you a bouquet of flowers, you know? But importing them took longer than i expected and, well, I told the florist that I was giving it to someone very special so they spent some extra time on the arrangement..." He trails off, clearing his throat nervously. "...Do you like it?"
And that sets loose the tears behind your eyes.
Wriothesley panics a little when he sees how you blubber, sobs making your shoulders shake as you hide your face in the flowers. His eyes widen, a frantic apology on the tip of his tongue while he fears that he messed up somehow. But then you tackle him into a hug, arms wrapping around his shoulders, pulling him close until you can bury your head in his chest and cry. His arms wrap around you almost hesitantly, but when you nuzzle closer into his embrace and they tighten around you.
You're barely able to speak through your tears, words muffled around his undoubtedly ruined shirt.
"I love it." I love you, you really mean.
And how can you not? This sweetheart of a man bought you flowers just because he wanted to. Because no one else had before, and he wanted to be the first person to do so. All his sporadic trips to the surface for the past week make sense— you doubt procuring so many imported flowers so quickly was an easy task on top of troubleshooting the various hiccups of the fortress and sorting through some documents that found themselves on his desk. But he did it anyway, just because he thought it'd make you happy.
"I'm glad," Wriothesley murmurs. He rocks you back and forth in his embrace until your happy tears begin to subside. Then he clears his throat. "So, can I buy you another one next week, too?"
[ #Taglist registration here !! ]
#astronetwrk#「 🐈⬛ 」 catcze.desserts#wriothesley x reader#genshin impact x reader#cw gn reader#genshin impact#wriothesley#I saw a reel on instagram and ran to my laptop#im ngl i contemplated Wrio putting a ring in the bouquet and proposing to you at the end but idk it felt too out of the blue HAHAHA#another fic maybe 👀👀#reader cries because i cry at the slightest gesture of love and kindness haksjdn hashtag self indulgent LMAOOO
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❕nsfw venti x fairy!reader
summary: as the anemo archon, venti knew about the various wind fairies that inhabit monstadt. they’re usually rather small, almost like a seelie. when he finally found you, a cute little anemo fairy in the wild, he couldn’t help but play with you!
wind fairies in monstadt weren’t very common, but they certainly did exist. you existed in the soft breeze, as nothing but a shining light that dances freely.
you stem from dandelions, only few are blessed by the anemo archon and manage to fully grow your wings and fly. your siblings and your friends were all blown away, living their lives freely as dandelion seeds.
even so, venti has never ever seen one of your kind up until now, when he was strolling around starsnatch cliff. he only meant to pick flowers, and never expected to grab one with such a delicate little thing like you lounging on the petals.
“my my, what do we have here?” he whispers gleefully, his bright teal eyes shimmering as he blinks at your figure.
anemo fairies truly were beautiful.
“a-ah!” you exclaim, your eyes opening as his voice rings through your ears. curse his stupidly loud mouth —!
your body is flung off of the cecilia flower, and as quick as you awoke you find yourself on the floor with a “thud”, your body growing to match his size.
you really could get used to switching forms, you think to yourself with a sigh as your wings twitch and flutter.
though, if you didn’t switch when you did you’re sure you would’ve blown away and blended with the wind.
who is this man?
“how fascinating!” he exclaims, a soft gust of wind carrying his body up to float in the air as he squeals. he can barley contain his excitement as he watches you look up at him with a curious gaze.
“quit staring, mister.” you frown, stumbling to stand up. human bodies are much heavier than your fairy form, you wonder how mortals can lug around all that weight.
venti chuckles at your words, slowly landing back down on the grass as he reaches for your hand, a soft and excited sound leaving his lips as he touches the skin of your palm.
“sorry, sorry. it’s my first time encountering a fairy.” he admits, pulling you up to stand properly.
you don’t miss the way his eyes scan your body, from your feet to the top of your head. he focuses on your wings for a while, watching as they create small breezes of wind with each little movement. 
“i’m just a fairy. nothing special.” you sigh, looking down at your bare feet as warmth pokes at your cheeks. has the wind gotten warmer or is there something wrong with you?
in all honesty, you’re not used to the functions of a humanly body.
“nothing special? nothing special?!” the archon repeats, staring at you with wide eyes as he holds onto your hand tighter. “you’re the most special being i’ve ever laid my eyes upon, my dear.” he hums, leaning closer to you as he inspects your features.
“oh—?” you look back up at him as his hand reaches to brush a few stray hairs behind your pointed ear.
“you know, i’ve always wondered how an anemo fairy like you would react to me..” his hands wanders down your body, avoiding your sensitive wings to brush against your clothing.
it was a thin dress, breathable and easy to flow in the wind. also perfect for venti to bunch it up around your waist and pinch at your hips.
“do this.” he giggles, watching as you flinch slightly. “are you alright with this, sweet fairy?” he asks, his breathy voice ringing in your ears as his free hand reaches down between your thighs.
“i am..” you can only manage to whisper a quiet affirmation, your body relaxing in his hold.
you allow his fingers to nudge at your bare pussy, moaning softly as he rubs your clit gently. you’re already so wet for him, like the good girl he knew you’d be.
one of his hand has a tight hold on your hip, the other hand already plunging two of his slender fingers into your little fairy cunt.
the sounds leaving your lips were more beautiful than any mere song the bard could come up with; he’ll have to sit you down next to him as he plays his lyre sometime.
“look at you,” he teases, his fingers nudging deep into your gummy walls, allowing you to adjust for a moment before he pulls out slightly and slams them back into you, starting a steady pace as moans spill from your mouth. “i didn’t know a delicate thing like you could be so filthy.”
it was so nasty, the way your cunt squelched with each thrust of his fingers. it only took a few more strokes for you to cum around him, moaning softly into the wind around you.
the archon didn’t care that the two of you were out in the open air — for any unsuspecting couple to stumble upon in hopes of finding a good date spot.
this was his land after all, and you’re his little fairy.
“that’s right, my fairy. mine.” he whispers, his voice carried away with a gentle breeze as he presses wet kisses against your neck.
after a few more thrusts of his fingers, he pulled out slightly, teasingly licking at your cum coating his slender digits.
“now, be a good fairy for me and stay still.” he’d coo, caressing your cheek with his free hand as his other tugs down his pants. “such a good, good fairy.”
his voice is as sweet as sugar as his cock springs free, hard and leaking with pre as he aligns himself with your sloppy cunt.
moans and whimpers spilled from your lips as he slowly slid into you, his dick reaching a spot you never even knew humans had — it seemed that a fairy’s body is much different.
as he began to slam his length in and out of you repeatedly, you couldn’t help but throw your head back in a newfound pleasure, your eyes rolling into the back of your skull as your wings fluttered behind you.
your sounds only grew louder as the bard tugged on your wings so gently, almost like a soft breeze brushing against them.
it felt so good when he filled you up like this, your pussy switching lewdly around him with each harsh thrust.
“so good!” you squeal as he reaches impossibly further, lips kissing at your neck and dancing down to your collarbone.
“so good?” he repeats, smirking up at you as he watches your expression contort in pleasure. “how cute.”
it wasn’t long before the two of you got closer and closer, the coil in your abdomen growing tighter and tighter before you came undone around him, whining as he emptied himself inside of you.
he didn’t stop there, though. his pace grew even faster, it was a miracle you managed to stay upright. if it wasn’t for the strange flow of the wind today, it was certain you would’ve tumbled over.
the chilling sensation of the air brushing against the remnants venti’s saliva sent a sweet tingle down your spine as your thoughts drifted away into dumbness.
at this point all you could do is sit there prettily and take the archon’s cock as he pulls orgasm after orgasm out of you.
#genshin smut#genshin venti#venti smut#venti x reader#venti x you#venti x y/n#barbatos x reader#genshin x reader#genshin x you#genshin x y/n
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Beetlejuice's Backstory and the Black Plague 💚🕷️🥀💀 PART 1
I went and watched the new Beetlejuice movie twice already, can’t wait to share my thoughts! I’ve decided to make a series of posts mainly dedicated to people that are curious about the Black Plague era and BJ's past life. Join me for a historical dive that might make you appreciate Tim Burton’s work even more!
Warning: This post contains SPOILERS for the 2024 movie Beetlejuice Beetlejuice.
Premise
In European countries, we often study the Black Plague in schools. In Italy specifically, the disease spread multiple times throughout the Middle Ages, with the two worst pandemics occurring around 1350 and 1630. The first one alone spread in many countries and caused a total of 20 million deaths - a THIRD of the population of the whole European continent at the time.
However, the 1630 outbreak is the one we know about the most, thanks to author Alessandro Manzoni (1785-1873), who described it meticulously in his masterpiece, ‘I promessi sposi' (The Betrothed): This book is one of the most important works in Italian literature. Although it is a novel, it is often treated as historical evidence because Manzoni actually shaped the story referring to archival documents and chronicles of the time.
Introducing: Monatti, the corpse carriers
In his book, Manzoni recalls a group of people called 'monatti' - the only ones allowed to practice public services such as collecting the dead and washing roads during those hellish times. This concession was motivated by the fact that monatti were considered immune to the disease.
However, they were feared and hated by the rest of the population, because they often misused their ‘privileged’ position: they were untouchable. They often extorted money from the living and stole the belongings of the dead and the sick alike, without repercussions. What made them special was the fact that monatti typically gained immunity after surviving the disease themselves.
“Farewell to Cecilia,” one of the most heart-wrenching moments in Manzoni’s novel, beautifully captured by Francesco Gonin.
In fact, the Black Plague typically spread in three ways: through skin contact (bubonic plague), lungs (pneumonic plague) or blood infection (septicemic plague). The Bubonic form was, and still is, the most common and had the highest survival rate, though it was still quite low. It was easily identifiable because it caused the lymph nodes to swell and become infected, forming characteristic 'buboes'.
It was believed that if a plague victim survived five days, the fever would subside, and they would recover within two weeks. This is what usually happened to the monatti. Similarly, Renzo, the protagonist in Manzoni’s book, recovers, though he never becomes a public worker.
Now, let’s dive back into Beetlejuice’s backstory.
Amidst the eerie glow of moonlight, he's depicted among corpses, at night, behind a wagon, stealing from the dead that were just thrown into a communal pit by plague doctors.
Notice how he’s directly touching the bodies with his bare hands, without any protection: usually, that was considered a death sentence.
In Manzoni’s book, there is a character that meets their end in a similar way, simply by touching the clothes of an infected person. During that era, the danger was so great that people used to burn the bodies of the plague victims along with their clothes, beds, and other possessions.
It is also worth mentioning that, during plague outbreaks, some city governments (particularly in Italy and Poland) imposed strict limitations on the movement of people and goods. In some areas, a nighttime curfew was also enforced (Yes, we invented the lockdown centuries ago!). Under those circumstances, being caught outside your own house at the wrong hour could mean instant death. But guess who had the freedom to roam as they pleased? Yes, monatti and plague doctors (and those with special permits).
Conclusion: Beetlejuice wasn’t just 'a humble grave robber', as he claims. He was definitely a plague survivor and, most likely, a monatto.
The fact that this scene was unveiled and narrated in Italian during the Venice Film Festival further convinces me that this is the correct interpretation of the sequence.
So, what do we think? Have you ever heard or read about The Betrothed before? Anyways, if you liked this analysis, make sure to check out PART 2, in which we can delve even deeper into Beetlejuice’s mysterious past!
Until then, have a fantastic week! ✨
#beetlejuice movie#tim burton#michael keaton#film theory#film analysis#film stills#cinema#film#movie#beetlejuice#betelgeuse#beetlejuice sequel#beetlejuice beetlejuice#europe#italy#heritage#plague doctor#beetlebabes#italian literature#alessandro manzoni#i promessi sposi#the betrothed#italian#historical novel#dark#grunge#plaguecore#black plague#keatonjuice#warner bros
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🌦Confessions gone wrong...
Genshin men and how they fuck up their confessions to you.
Ft. Bennett, Venti, Xingqiu, Xiao, Itto, and Wanderer
Tags: Fem!Reader, Long-Hair!Reader(Xingqiu), crushes, pining, fluff, pg, bad things happen to good people. Note: This thread is mostly humor. I just really wanted to bully some characters. No beta. Pay no mind to me trying to edit my mistakes after this has been posted. (Repost!)
Bennett
Fatal Flaw: Honestly does nothing wrong, is just an unlucky dude.
There’s too many instances to count. The poor boy has really been trying to tell you his feelings for MONTHS.
In his excitement he wanted to be flashy and ask you out somewhere cool, like by the big tree in Windrise. The weather thankfully allowed it, but right as he was about to take your hand and confess, a swarm of crystal flies began swarming him. You didn’t know they could be so aggressive.
A restaurant! He could treat you to a meal and tell you there! When the two of you arrived at Good Hunter, it was unfortunately closed early for the day. Apparently all of the meat had suddenly gone bad…
You get the gist.... he’s been in this constant confession limbo for a while now. The more he wants it the worse it goes.
Bennett finally decided he didn’t need the bells and whistles. He cared about you a lot and he was going to confess to you if it was the last thing he did. And it damn well might be. With a new found determination, he ran out to do just that.
“Y/N!” Bennett called out when he spotted you by the Adventure’s Guild. He rushed to you, paying special attention to every stair step to keep from tripping. You turned around and smiled too sweetly when you caught sight of him. It made the boy’s heart thump in his chest. Were it not for his sudden tunnel vision, he may have noticed that cat running past him and not trip down the remaining flight of stairs.
The next time he opened his eyes, he found himself being carried up the familiar route to the cathedral. The adventurer’s face flushed bright red when he realized you were the one carrying him piggyback. It was embarrassing..... but it shamefully wasn’t the first time. Bennett sighed in defeat and simply leaned into your back. When felt his shift in weight, you glanced back to smile at him. You giggled at his clumsiness and it was like music to the boy’s ears. You told him how glad you were that he already regained consciousness this time.
The two of you began joke around like usual and talked the rest of the way there. Bennett took the small victories.
Venti
Fatal Flaw: Tries to impress you too hard.
He knew exactly where he was going to sing his love ballad about you. The sound of the wind as it blew off the hills of starsnatch cliff would be the perfect accompaniment. Maybe it would need some encouragement, but it was nothing he couldn’t accomplish.
Venti wanted the wine to be just right for the occasion too. You deserved nothing but the best. And how else would he be able to judge the quality.... if not just a teeny tiny taste test? He had to be thorough about this choice after all.
The bard usually had enough self control to limit himself to a glass or two, but he felt his nerves get to him a tad. Venti had the confidence that he could show you a beautiful night, but in the end it was your choice whether to accept his heartfelt gesture. The archon respected your freedom above all else.
They sure don’t call it liquid courage for nothing! Venti was brimming with confidence when he brought you to a picnic under a tree, overlooking the cecilias in full bloom. You were visibly in awe, and your reactions quickly inflated the bard’s ego to dangerous heights. “If you think that’s beautiful, watch this.”
A gust of wind flowed over the field, sweeping up all the fallen petals to dance in the air. It was unreal, magical, magnificent, splendid, it was…… buzzing? A thud fell between the two of you and effectively ended the romantic moment. It was a wasps nest.
“ABANDON SHIP!” Venti cried out, grabbing your hand and booking it downhill.
Xingqiu
Fatal Flaw: Hubris.
He really doesn’t like to toot his own horn. Maybe once in a while when it’s warranted. But he really out did himself. Xingqiu read plenty of books regarding the art of courting, and they guided the way to what was sure to be the most romantic confession possible.
The brilliance was in the simplicity of the plan. First he would begin with a gift. The two of you always met at the book store on your off-days. When he sees you wear your long hair in your usual up-do, he would offer the beautiful hair ornament he acquired. Maybe in your excitement, you would even allow him to affix it for you.
The boy’s stomach dropped when he saw you enter the bookstore. He stared while you looked around for him, turning your head left and right in an adorable manner. The movement accentuated your newest feature... a hair cut. “Y/N, over here.” Xingqiu called to you, his confidence was already wavering a little. You excitedly walked to meet up with him and offered a big grin.
Well all is not lost! This leads into his next step; Flattery! “Dear Y/N, you cut your hair. It looks-” “Ugh, don’t remind me.” You quickly cut him off, mood souring just a tad. You explain the tragic story of how you stupidly got a chunk of your hair caught in a lever. The only solution was to cut it clean off, the dramatic change was definitely still a sore topic.
Now the boy was breaking a sweat. He changed to a new tactic, to cheer you up. Xingqiu dropped the subject and prompted that you both look at the newest releases. It would help to take your mind off things and he was banking on the last step of his plan to pan out. It was his last hope.
The two of you settled on the docks and were eager to discuss the books you had just picked. Xingqiu had hidden a love poem into the latest book from your favorite author. He knew you couldn’t resist picking it up, so he stealthily slipped the note into the book you held. Xingqiu spend all night pouring his heart out just right onto the page, as if trying to convey every reason he should be by your side. He expressed his desperate want to be the one to protect and cherish you. Watching you now, talking about your day, left his brain dazed in admiration. It made him realize that all those little things before didn’t matter, as long as you knew how much he adored you in the end.
Finally, you pulled out your newest book to show Xingqiu. The distressed boy nearly fell off the dock. “T-the cover-” He stammered, quickly righting himself. You looked back at him concerned, and slowly explained that it was a limited edition cover. It was only available for the first hundred copies sold. When you saw there was still some in stock, you just had to snag one.
Why do novels make romance it sound so easy....
Xiao
Fatal Flaw: One track mind.
Xiao had been hyping himself up for this one moment for weeks! He nearly talks himself out of confessing every other minute. You may not even reciprocate, but for his sanity he couldn’t keep hiding how deeply he cares for you. The whole situation was so uncertain but the hammering in his chest was proof that he had to do this.
Its like a band-aid he just had to rip it off. To get it over with. Xiao had no idea how to approach it and resorted to redeeming a favor owed to him. He needed to know what he was getting into and have a battle plan. When he approached Ganyu for advice he concealed most of the details. If she was any the wiser who he was asking romantic advice for, she was kind enough to not to mention it and let him keep his pride.
Xiao glanced down at the single glaze lily in his hand. The irony was not lost on him. It was almost humorous, an adeptus making an offering to a mortal and asking for their blessing.
It was almost the time and he prepared as if going into war. You greeted him and sat casually on the balcony railing of Wangshu Inn. Xiao wasted no time with pleasantries and held out the glaze lily to you. “Please accept this.” He stated. The flower was rigidly extended to the full length of his arm. The fiery determination on his face was quite off-putting while offering such a delicate plant.
“Ah... I appreciate it Xiao, I really do, but I can’t.” You began to say, confusion steeping into your tone.
“I insist and I ask that you hear me out.” Xiao’s arm did moving an inch. It was the first thing Ganyu told him to do. He couldn’t abandon his path already.
“What is going on Xiao? I really can’t accept-” You try to explain.
“Please.” His eyes were downcast and the yaksha’s tone was the closest thing to a plea that you’ve ever heard it. You were a tad bewildered and felt as though there was no use trying to talk him down right now. Left with no other choice, you reluctantly took the glaze lily in your hand.
“Y/N I must tell you that I-” Thats as far as Xiao got before the coughing fit began. Your wracking coughs brought you to your knees. A wheeze is the only thing you could manage as you point to your bag. Xiao was alert and scrambling to make sense of what was happening. Your bag is brought to you in an instant and an arm wrapped around your waist to gently guide you to a chair.
It took twenty minutes to fully get your breathing under control. You declined is offer to go grab you help. You just knew Xiao would disappear as soon as it arrived. It was a small allergy attack and nothing too threatening, but you could tell the boy next to you was profusely beating himself up for it.
You never did find out why he was so insistent on you taking that flower. What a strange guy.
Itto
Fatal Flaw: All of the above.
The whole situation was more or less doomed from the start. Once his oblivious ass realized he was in love with you, it was over. The oni was going to confess to you so hard that people were going to be talking about it for YEARS!
It was an all hands on deck operation. Itto gathered the whole gang and then some. He was able to recruit the neighborhood kids to gather as many sakura pedals as they could carry. The boys were on staging duty, making sure the location was so romantic it could even make onikabuto stop fighting long enough fall in love. Itto even managed win a few fireworks off Yoimiya. (She brutally crushed him in a game of Genius Invokation TCG, and mercifully tossed a couple firecrackers his way as a consolation prize.) SCORE!
It was all coming together! All that was left was to distract you for just a little bit longer. That was a job so important that he could only entrust it to his competent second in command. Shinobu tried to convince Itto again and again that he didn’t need all this extra stuff. Pulling off something this complicated was only setting his expectations to an impossible height. Overall wouldn't it be better to be up front and earnest with you about how he felt? Her genuine, good advice promptly fell on deaf ears. Itto was far too busy trying to find which color would make his horns look even cooler in the light of all the fireflies they captured to release right when he said he loved you. Shinobu left this trainweck to to its thing and went to go find you.
She usually would’ve press the subject more, but she did genuinely enjoy your company. The Arataki Gang Deputy considered you a good influence on the boss and anything that could keep him out of trouble, the better.
At last, the time arrived to set all the gears into motion. Now Itto just had to wait for.... The realization hit him. He hadn't told you or Shinobu a time or place too meet today.
The bumbling oni spent a great deal of the afternoon searching for you like a lost puppy. “Yo! Y/N! Hey Hi! I gotta talk to you!” Itto yelled out across the road. He had finally managed to catch up to you two. The guy was ecstatic that things were looking up, plan was back on track! If he hurried now he could get you to the location the gang set up before sunset.
Itto excitedly told you that you HAD to see something. You were always amused by his antics, so of course you agreed. Without hesitation the oni all but dragged you out the door and towards the beach.
When you arrived.... oh crap.
Apparently, you need to get a “warrant” or something to set up the most romantic love confession of all time. Are they trying to say they own the beach or something? That's crazy now! The gang members were trying to explain themselves to the Tenryou Commission guards when you both walked in on the scene. Itto may have made things only a little tiny bit worse when he called the annoyed guard a “block head without a romantic bone in his body”, but no one was keeping score were they? Nonetheless, the whole altercation placed everyone on the scene in a Tenryo Commission cell... including you.
Shinobu was gonna be so pissed.
Wanderer
Fatal Flaw: Forgets he’s supposed to be confessing.
The whole situation was incredibly annoying anyway. You were the one who wouldn’t take the hint, why should he have to spell it out for you. It’s not like he even wanted these feelings. It was all happening without his permission. On top of that, you were dense enough to miss the point every single time he tried to explain it to you.
“Is something on my face?” You asked your newly reformed friend while putting down your book. He'd been boring holes into your skull for several minutes now.
“No? Why are you asking dumb questions?” He snapped. You noticed Wanderer had been doing that quite frequently recently. You sighed in defeat and began gathering your things.
“If you don’t have anything nice to say, I’m heading out.” You told him casually.
You were usually pretty patient with Wanderer, but he’d been in some sort of sour mood lately. Typically it took a few more irksome things before he would start his attitude, but you just couldn’t figure out whats been setting him off recently. You decided it was best to just let him calm down and try again later.
“Don’t.” Wanderer said snatched your hand roughly before you could get too far. “I didn’t mean it like that. I wasn’t calling you dumb.” He spoke without looking directly at you. You made no movement towards returning and his grip on your hand did not let up.
“And?” You prompted gently.
“Sorry. I’m sorry I said it.” He spat out, clearly annoyed.
You settled back down and asked him what's been bothering him. It’s clear that he was on edge and when you pointed it out his posture became rigid. He was a former Harbinger for fuck sake. Why was this so terrifying. He had been through hell and back without flinching, yet here you were just a person with a goofy laugh and weird interests. It shouldn’t be that hard.
“It’s your fault.” The boy accused, shooting you an annoyed glare. “These emotions aren’t exactly something that come with a manual.”
You blinked back at him in confusion and damn it now you looked cute.
“Stop looking at me! It’s weird.” Wanderer sneered, and immediately scolded himself for harsh it came out. You narrowed your eyes and pointed out that he was just staring at you just a few moments ago. Doesn't that make him weird too? “What? No! That was different. Fuck, you’re already missing the point. That’s why this is impossible with you!”
You were loosing your patience and told him he was being just as impossible. “Me? At least I'm trying to talk here. You make things so much harder. If you just didn’t look at me like I asked, this wouldn’t have been an issue.” The boy jabbed back at you.
The bickering went on for a while and concluded with both of you storming off in opposite directions. It wasn’t until Wanderer entered the second room over that he remembered what he was trying to say...... “Ugh, smooth.” He scowls.
<A/N: Hello again! I forgot this one was so long! Thanks for the love I've been receiving on my other works! I read them all and they got me kicking my feet and twirling my hair frfr!>
#genshin#genshin headcanons#genshin imagines#genshin impact#genshin x reader#arataki itto#genshin xiao#bennett x reader#bennett genshin impact#genshin venti#venti x reader#genshin impact venti#venti#xingqiu#xingqiu genshin impact#xingqiu x reader#itto x reader#genshin itto#itto#xiao x reader#xiao#wanderer x reader#wanderer genshin#genshin scara#scaramouche
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— glimpses of life.
misc. scenarios with them. (ft. diluc, childe, kaeya, kazuha and xiao.)
diluc ragnvindr.
“diluc, can we please, please go to starsnatch cliff today?” you plead on one fine day, tugging at his sleeve.
never one to deny your requests and always one to indulge your whims, he glances at his desk. “well, I am done with a considerable amount of work, so i don't see why we can't.” he kisses your temple and lightly pats your head. “we’ll go after lunch, beloved.”
you cheer, a sparkle in your eyes, and a million flowers bloom in his heart; an ever-growing garden.
true to his words, he takes you there later that day. while you take pleasure in the view and the feeling of the wind, he relishes in your smile and the pure, unbridled joy you exude. he's seen a thousand views over the years, but he knows nothing will ever come close to the one in front of him.
“diluc, look.” you call his name, and he lifts up a hand in acknowledgement. “look at what i found!”
he walks over with a curious expression on his face. you gesture to the flower in your hand, and he looks at it, confused, brows knitted. “my apologies, my heart, but i believe that’s just a cecilia?”
you shake your head with a mysterious smile dancing on your lips. “no, no, look closely, this one’s special.”
he runs his eyes over it again, analyzing the color, the shape of the petals and the green of the leaves. “it looks exactly like the others, my love.”
you sigh, dramatically looking at the sky. “no, my dear darling diluc, this one’s different from the rest,” you meet his eyes once more, and he sees mischief dancing in them. “it’s different because—” you drag it out for as long as you can. he raises an eyebrow at your familiar dramatics. “—this one right here, is the one i think would look the best in your hair.” he coughs in surprise, not expecting that answer and your grin almost splits your face in two.
“it would look quite delightful against the red, wouldn’t it?” you press on.
“whatever you say, beloved.” he tries his best to keep his expression neutral, but his voice wavers. you grin wider
“come closer, then! let me put it there for you.”
he leans over, allowyou to secure it in place behind his ear. “well, what do you think?” he looks at you, fondness swimming in crimson eyes.
“beautiful.” the one-word response takes him by surprise and a blush spreads over his face. “diluc, you’re starting to look like your hair now. you're very cute, aren't you?”
he groans, head in his palms. “whatever will i do with you?”
“love me, hopefully.” that he does, with all of his heart.
and many moons later, you find the same flower carefully pressed and preserved between the pages of his journal. a tiny heart proudly adores the caption: a gift, from my beloved.
childe.
the day began perfectly. the sky was clear, the sun was shining, and a periodic breeze blew throughout the harbor. and it stayed that way, until childe decided it was a great day for a sparring match.
it was fine in the beginning; you were able to keep up. however, seeing as you lacked his inhuman stamina and thirst for battle, your energy drained far quicker.
after a long—too long in your opinion— session, you crumple onto the ground, exhausted beyond measure.
“come on, sweetie, you can do better than that!” he says, playfully spinning his weapon. “what happened to all that spirit i saw earlier today?” he kneels down next to you. “let’s go for another round, shall we?”
“no thanks,” you grumble. “i’m perfectly fine here. the ground and i are friends now.”
“aww,” he adopts an expression of mock disappointment, then chuckles. “although, i must admit, you really were commendable today.”
he stands up and offers you a hand. “let’s head back, i’m dying for something refreshing.”
“fine.” you huff. you take his hand and get up with a groan. you expect him to let go after you’re situated securely on your feet, but he tightens his grip and shoots you a bright grin instead.
and in spite of your exhaustion, you return it almost instantaneously.
as you walk to your destination together, he swings your intertwined hands over and over again, chattering away, and you can’t help but think that maybe the day wasn’t so bad after all.
kaeya alberich.
the long, grueling day left you an equally unpleasant souvenir to deal with: a horrible, awful headache.
kaeya, perceptive as ever, notices the minute you step through the door.
“are you okay, sweetheart?” he holds your face in his hands, concern written all over his expression.
you nod, slowly. he raises an eyebrow and gives you a long, serious glance. you correct yourself. “terrible headache. i feel like something a horse left behind.”
he chuckles lightly. “oh, my poor sweet baby,” he coos. “let’s get you something to alleviate the pain, shall we, dearest?”
he gathers pillows and blankets and makes a soft, cuddly pile for you to rest in. once he helps you settle in, he wraps you up in one of the blankets. “there we go,” he strokes your hair. “close your eyes and relax, i’ll make something warm for you.”
and make something warm he does. once you open your eyes after a half hour, you find a plate of your favorite food awaiting you.
“say ah.” a spoon enters your field of vision.
“kaeya! you don’t have to feed me!” you pout at him. “i can do it myself,”
he hums, “i know, but i want to. now,” he brings it closer to your lips. “hurry up and eat before it gets cold.”
a warm belly and an hour later, your head rests in his lap while he massages your forehead. “does that feel good?” his long, lithe fingers rub circles into your temples and gently press the bridge of your nose.
“like heaven.” you smile, “i feel much better now. thank you,” you motion with your hands. “for everything.”
“i’m always at your service, my angel. and i do it with pride.”
kaedehara kazuha.
“oh dear, it appears that our timing may have been off,” raindrops fall onto his outstretched hand, and he looks up at the cloudy sky.
“don’t worry,” you smile at him, “i’m sure i have an umbrella here with me.”
“or,” he catches your wrist before you can reach for your bag and intertwines your fingers. “we could forego the umbrella entirely, and enjoy the rain in all its glory?”
you look at him sideways, “kazuha, i love you very much, but this idea of yours could make us fall sick.”
“my lovely blossom,” he brings your hand up to place a featherlight kiss, fleeting, delicate and gentle. “if you were to fall ill, I promise you that without a shadow of a doubt, i would be by your side the whole time.”
“and what about you?”
“me?” he laughs, carefree, airy, and so very endearing, sound melding beautifully with the pitter-patter of the rain. “i’d say a small cold is worth a few moments of absolute freedom, wouldn’t you agree?”
his eyes are eager and pleading, and you cannot find the heart to deny him of his request. a grin tugs at the ends of his mouth, and you know that he knows exactly that.
“fine,” you nod your head, fighting off a smile of your own. “i suppose we could, just this once.”
“thank you, dearest.” he tugs you closer to his chest. “now, listen closely, or you might miss it.”
you strain your ears, concentrating very hard on your surroundings. at first, all you can hear is falling water, which soon gives way to chirping birds and crickets, a harmonious symphony that seems to have been tailor made just for the both of you.
“it would be a shame to let this music go to waste,” he says, bowing, “would you do me the honor of a dance, starlight?”
he pulls you out from under your temporary shelter and twirls you round and around until you’re laughing, and he is too. your feet move in erratic motions, yet rhythm thrives in every single step. droplets trickle down both your bodies, weighing down your clothes and hair, but you pay it no mind.
and there, with him, a blur of red against the grey sky and trees of jade and olive, you think of exactly how blessed you are to have him with you.
xiao.
another week, another random disappearance. xiao looks at you suspiciously as you make an almost unbelievable excuse. “i need to go to the harbor to check if my shipment of inazuman ore has arrived,” you tell him as you fail miserably in hiding a note behind your back.
“i need to check if granny shan’s made the kites i asked her to,” another poor excuse.
he remembers every aspect of your mercantile business that you’ve told him about so far, and he knows full well that the shipment you’re speaking of arrived last month, and he knows that the kites have been delayed by another three weeks because of a priority order, yet he says nothing.
this constant cycle continues for over a month, and he stays silent each and every time, opting to give you space and not step over the threshold of your privacy. after all, you had your life, didn't you? he didn't share every aspect of his own with you, and in his view, you shouldn't be expected to either.
so he leaves it be.
until one day, he hears a faint call of his name in the wind. he recognizes the voice almost instantaneously and he teleports there just as fast. he sees you, leg stuck under a huge rock and a cart overturned on the side of the path.
“what in the name of rex lapis were you trying to accomplish?” he asks, after he’s freed you.
“nothing!” you shake your head, slowly rotating your ankle. “i was just heading back to the inn.”
he raises an eyebrow, but accepts it nevertheless. sighing, he kneels down. “is your leg alright?”
you nod. “don’t worry, the weight of the boulder wasn’t on my leg, i just couldn’t move it.”
he escorts you back to the inn, as reserved as the night, with not a single unnecessary word. only once the two of you are in your quarters does he shatter the silence.
“i have been observing you for days now,” his eyes are slightly narrowed. “what are you trying to do?”
you look down, awkwardly rubbing your neck. “this isn’t how i hoped to tell you but,” you reach for a small pouch. “this is for you.” you wait till he takes it and continue, “the reason i’ve been acting so strange lately is because i was having this made for you.”
he pulls the drawstring open and finds an amulet, made of the most delicately cut amber he’d seen till date.
“you know how amber helps to clear and cleanse negative energy?” you fiddle with your fingers, looking down at the ground. “i thought it might help you with your karmic debt. it symbolizes good luck in battle too.”
he makes a noise halfway between a snort and a grunt. “my karmic debt is not your responsibility.” he turns it around. “besides, we adepti have no need for such a trinket.”
you smile. “i know. think of it as a way to assure my peace of mind?”
“hmph.” he looks away. “fine. if that is what you wish.” his face softens. “thank you for thinking of me.”
“i’m always thinking of you, xiao. especially when you’re out cleansing the land.”
red rises to his face. “tch. you truly have no respect for an adeptus and their skills.”
he says that, yet every time you see him, the amber amulet sits just below his collarbone, gleaming proudly in the light.
#—🖋#genshin impact x reader#genshin x reader#diluc x reader#childe x reader#kaeya x reader#kazuha x reader#xiao x reader#diluc ragnvindr x reader#kaeya alberich x reader#kaedehara kazuha x reader#genshin impact x you#genshin x you#diluc x you#childe x you#kazuha x you#kaeya x you#xiao x you#genshin impact fluff#genshin fluff#another repost let's go
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With Discretion - Part 2 **
Part 2 is here! We'll get to learn more about Harry's side of things and be exposed to a bit more of the mess Caleb is in, and of course...the reconnection of Y/N & Harry! I hope you guys like it! I think there will be a 3rd/final part to this fic:) Read Part 1 HERE & find my masterlist HERE.
Warnings: verbal argument, dirty talk, oral (f-receiving), hand job, p in v (unprotected), creampie, breast play, infidelity,
WC: 14.2K
… SIX MONTHS AGO …
When Harry saw your smiling face at the bar, asking him about some fictional business trip to Tokyo, his lips involuntarily turned up in a smile. He hadn’t forgotten about you because you had dropped a huge bomb on him when you revealed to him that his CFO was married. He didn’t care too much about his employees’ personal lives, but after learning that he started to notice how big of a flirt he was around the office. Those observations then led to him dedicating the occasional thought to you and how you might be fairing. He was pleased to see that you seemed to be doing well.
But there was also a part of him that felt sad for you . He thought that perhaps the knowledge of yet another lie Caleb had told you would weigh heavily on you and surely break you but he was surprised that as the night carried on you were the most composed out of your friends. You didn’t seem like you were upset in the slightest even as you drank, which was what usually drew the emotions out of people. You were having fun and singing and dancing, talking with everyone as if your life was a dream. Harry wanted to get in your head and see for himself what it was that you were thinking; he couldn’t stop looking at you…you were too beautiful to not draw his gaze so he kept looking until you were looking back just as much. And after an hour he was planted beside you, talking to you and flirting a bit and it didn’t seem to bother you. You were flirting back and he was having a lot of fun getting to know you. You were smart and kind and so much fun to be around!
What he was enjoying the most was that you seemed to be on the same wavelength internally and that was rare for him to find. Harry was great at connecting with people on the surface, but it was special for him to meet someone who made him feel like they got him. And you seemed to get him really well, he could feel this pull…an attraction that he hadn’t felt to another person in far too long, and it was electrifying and it was keeping him on his toes. He knew that there was nothing he could do to fix your situation with Caleb, but he wanted to go out of his way and shower you with kindness and chivalry while he could and maybe something in your head would click and make you leave that sorry son of a bitch, Caleb. “Harry?” You said as you came up to him.
“Yeah?” He asked, placing a hand at the middle of your back as he leaned his ear down to your mouth.
“I think I’m gonna head out. Cecilia is way too drunk, I want to get her back to the hotel before she blacks out on me somewhere and I can’t do anything about it.” You explained, “But thank you for including us tonight, it was so kind of you!”
“S’not a problem! And look, I have a car waiting around the block, I can help you take Cecilia to her hotel. Are you also staying there?”
“Yeah, we all are! But don’t worry about it! Stay and enjoy, have fun!” You assured him.
“Don’t know how much fun I can have after you’re gone, love.” He flirted and you smiled bashfully and looked away for a moment.
“Sure, sure…”
“I’m serious and also about taking you guys! I’ll feel better knowing I left you both safe and sound, alright? Please, s’no bother at all.” He said over the music and you sighed.
“OK, alright. I really do appreciate it, Harry.” You said with gratitude drenching your expression.
“Not a problem. Alright, let’s get to it.” He said as you started to get your things together.
Of course, there was a bit of traffic, even at 1am, and he watched as you ran your fingers through the top of your friend’s hair before gently massaging her scalp after she had laid down in your lap. He wanted to feel you like that; to be close to you and to smell your perfume and feel your fingers in his hair as he dozed off.
He continued talking to you, this time asking if you worked or if you had any projects you did in your spare time. And well, he learned that you ran your own event planning company, you had two masters degrees, one in Business Strategy & Leadership and the other in Finance & Accounting. You also enjoyed music, cooking, swimming, and traveling. Between the two of you, you had a lot in common, talking made the drive go by way too soon. But when you arrived at the hotel you two were in stitches as you tried to get Cecilia out of the car.
“I wonder if they have a wheelchair? Or maybe they’ll let us use one of the little luggage carts the bell boys use?” You asked through your laughter and he sputtered out a laugh.
“Unlikely. I ummm, I’m positive I can carry her.” He said to you.
“Oh my god, no. You’ve done more than enough tonight, Harry-”
“Just let me show off a bit, alright Y/N?” He teased and you giggled.
“Don’t think you need to carry Ceclia for that, but alright…” you smirked and he chuckled.
He was careful as he pulled her out of the car and well, he asked you to ensure the skirt of her dress wasn’t ridden up before you made your way inside. He noticed how friendly you were with the staff as well and that put a another good feeling about you in his chest. He wanted to know…to understand… to be able to rationalize Cal’s infidelity because from everything he had seen so far you were an angel in the flesh. Sure, some people were totally fake and had this dark side hidden within them. He’d fallen victim to that since he was young because of his family’s money and well, now his own money, so he could tell those people apart with ease now and if you were one of them he was none the wiser.
Before he knew it you guys were in the lift and you were looking through your friend’s bag for her room key. You looked relieved to find it and then shared a story about how one time in university the “responsible friend” was given the room key but lost her purse at some bar, so you all had to wait to get a replacement at the front desk. However, they had all been quite drunk so it complicated a fairly simple plan and a few of them ended up blacked out in the hallway and you and another girl had to drag them into the room when you got the replacement key.
“Are you the put-together friend, then?” Harry asked and you giggled.
“After my undergrad, yes.” You said and he chuckled.
“Why’s that?”
“Well, I was the only one who was going to grad school. I got into the Marshall School of Business on a really good scholarship, I couldn’t do anything to risk losing that. I had to have my wits about me at all times. The USC network is just so extensive, especially in LA, so I would probably run into another alumnus randomly at a taco bell at midnight. They’re very gossipy as well so while in school it’s good to just be on your best behavior.” You explained to him.
But soon enough you were leaving Cecilia in her room and he just wasn’t ready to leave you yet. So he offered to take you up to your room. Yeah, he’d been thinking about possibly kissing you or more throughout the night because there was chemistry between the two of you. The electricity was buzzing and he wanted so badly to see what would come of all of that attraction in an intimate setting, but you were married…to his CFO nonetheless! And well, he just had to ask you about what the deal was between you and Caleb. And he was shocked to learn that you’d been married to him for seven years though because Caleb had never once mentioned a wife and had always brought other dates around for parties or work outings and he felt angry at Caleb now. He wanted to tell you that this one affair wasn’t the only one, but that wasn’t his business to share. But it was shocking to him…he didn’t know how you kept your composure when you knew about his infidelity…he mentioned something about getting revenge on Caleb and he got a bit worried when your expression changed, maybe he had pushed you too far? And he was awaiting your response.
“I mean…thankfully, I don’t think I need that validation from anyone else.” You explained. Harry’s lips turned up in a smile as soon as he heard the words leaving your mouth, “I know who I am and I am happy with who I am, in every way. And not to sound arrogant, but I know what I bring to the table as a partner and if that’s not enough for someone then… their loss.” You said with ease.
Harry was absolutely blown away. He felt like his world had come to a screeching halt at your response. If he didn’t already like you before, he did a whole heck of a lot more now. He’d never met a person more put together than you and it was like a breath of fresh air. He had done a lot of challenging and painful work on himself in therapy, so he often found that most people lacked in self-worth or had no self-awareness, but you did. You were at his level mentally and emotionally and in truth, he had struggled finding partners because there was never really anyone out there who seemed to be on his level as well. If you’d been on a date he would’ve proposed to you then and there.
“You’re absolutely extraordinary.” He said without a single hint of inhibition.
And well, next thing he knew you were kissing ardently and then he was making you come over and over, showing you exactly how you deserved to be loved on. He was showing you how he would love on you if he were your man. And just getting to sink into you…he hadn’t had an experience that pleasurable in years. He was infatuated with your body and how it reacted to his. He wanted to ask you what felt good because he needed to make sure that he was doing exactly what you liked so that you could get off with intent. And hearing his name dripping from your beautiful lips was otherworldly. Everything about you was perfect and he made sure that he was treating you as such. You definitely needed the fuck, but you needed his tenderness and romancing just a little bit more. You needed to feel appreciated and seen above all else and he was going to give that to you while it was his chance to. Because as much as he was enamored with every part of you and longed to get lost in you, he knew that this was a first and last. A mere fluke of luck in his insignificant existence on this earth.
After everything he did to you, you had passed out almost immediately after he had cleaned you up. You were tucked safely into his side, cheek smushed against his brawny chest. His right leg was tucked securely in-between yours and his hand was smoothing up and down your lower back and just a bit of your bum. He couldn’t sleep without experiencing you like this for a bit. He wanted to see your soft and delicate features up close without alarming you in anyway. He wanted to get to smell you long enough to figure out what that perfume you were wearing was. He wanted to imprint in his memory what your skin felt like bare against his.
Harry was infatuated in a way he hadn’t been since he was 12 years old! He used to get sick to his stomach with adoration for another person and he felt it now, that everything was stirring up inside of him. He’d always felt things very deeply, but he hadn’t felt something so big in quite a while. It could be overwhelming to feel so much, to be so vulnerable all the time, he’d been hurt so often in his youth due to the heart he so proudly wore on his sleeve. So he learned to toughen up, mastered stoicism, and became the level-headed tycoon he was today. He taught himself discipline, routine, predictability…so that he wouldn’t ever be caught off guard again. But then, there’s always someone who’s just so perfectly honey-sweet that they get through the cracks. And you were exactly that. Even after your first meeting he thought of you often…another pretty picture that lived in the gallery of faces in his brain. But yours always stood out. He did hope he’d see you again, and it seemed that fate was on his side because there you were resting safely, with total trust in his arms…
The stoicism returned the following day because he didn’t want to risk perhaps being a toy in a game between you and Caleb…because if you asked he would be there for you again however you wanted him. He’d be at your beck and call if it’s what you wanted. But even still, you were kind and assured him that he was right, that this couldn’t happen again and that was that.
…ONE WEEK AGO …
Harry had imagined that it would be a while before the impression you’d left on him would fully wear off…that he’d stop fantasizing about you eventually…but here he was, six months later and feeling his irritation swelling as he watched Caleb flirting a bit with Tamika, his intern. Tamika was great. She was the top undergraduate business student at NYU. And yes, Tamika was a beautiful young woman, but he had boundaries unlike some people, and she was also gay. Maybe Cal didn’t know that, or perhaps he didn’t care…after his encounters with Y/N he started to realize just how much of a flirt he was. But as long as people weren’t complaining or Cal wasn’t wreaking havoc amongst his employees there was nothing Harry could really reprimand him about and that kind of pissed him off.
“You’re crazy, Cal!” Tamika laughed as she came up to his office door and opened it up the rest of the way, “Give me just a second and then I’ll leave you guys to it.” She assured him. “Harry, Dr. Dopico’s assistant called, her meetings are running about an hour late. I called Dean Sundaram and he said he’s flexible to what you decide. So do you want me to push your dinner plans or reschedule the meeting with NYU?” She asked him.
“Depends on what Caleb’s here to tell me…” Harry said as he smiled at Cal. He had been working on landing this potentially huge account that would be the thing that pushed him into billionaire status by the end of the year. There was some suspense in the air, but when Caleb started to grin, Harry chuckled knowingly.
“We got it.” Caleb confirmed and Harry was elated. Tamika was screaming, jumping up and down because she had been involved in the investment proposal writing and service planning that was presented to this client. This was huge for her resume and CV for grad school. Harry liked hiring students because he felt it was important for them to really apply what they learned in class, like he had. His dad was a beast in business and now Harry was too and he wanted to give others the same opportunities to learn and grow in a real world setting. But more importantly, being a billionaire would help him to launch forth tons of charitable and educational projects around the globe, like the one he was meeting Dr. Dopico for. He wanted to do more and be able to help more people and now, he could do it at a scale that actually made a difference.They all hugged briefly in celebration of what this meant for each of them.
“I’ll push your dinner reservations and update your talking points for the meeting with Dr. Dopico.” Tamika said before hurrying out of his office.
“Excellent job, Caleb! This is great news.” Harry was beaming despite his internal irritation towards his CFO. And then his smile dropped a bit as he wondered if Caleb would be sharing his big news with you tonight or someone else?
“Man, we all put in our piece. I’m glad we understood the client and them us, that’s what it came down to.” He smiled happily.
“Great work leading the team for this account though…ummm, I know I’m more reserved at work but I think this calls for a celebration with the team that made this possible.” Harry said, as his mind shot back to you. He wanted to see you.
“Oh no Harry, don’t worry about that-”
“No please, I insist! This is huge, I just want to properly thank you all for your dedication. Nothing wild, just a dinner? A nice formal one at my home up in Quogue, we can do it there. Everyone can bring a date and I mean, as you know, I have plenty of guest rooms if anyone gets a little too drunk, there’s room for everyone.” He said and Caleb smiled.
“If you’re really up for it I’m sure the team would really go for it.” Caleb assured.
“Cool. I’ll get something together tonight and send you guys an invitation. Plan for next Saturday, alright?” He said.
“Sounds good, thanks Harry.” Caleb said before heading out.
… PRESENT DAY …
Harry wanted to see you again, that’s why he had planned this dinner. He knew that the chances of Caleb bringing you tonight were next to none, but he just needed to take the shot in the dark because he was losing his mind thinking about you and not knowing. And maybe seeing you on your husband’s arm would be the thing to snap him out of this infatuation he had over you. Harry was a bit nervous as he had just run off for a moment to make a quick phone call to his dad that he’d been putting off for the last hour since he was awaiting Caleb’s arrival. He hoped to God he didn’t miss you making your entrance if Cal did bring you along.
“Yes dad, we have exclusivity. Alright…yes, bye.” Harry mumbled and hung up before shutting off his phone, no more work, he deserved to celebrate tonight.
“Mr. Hargrove has arrived.” Gerard came up to him informing him, like Harry had requested he do earlier.
“Oh, wonderful! Ummm…did he… bring anyone with him?” Harry asked and Gerard nodded, “Anyone you recognized?”
“No, but ummm, sir. He’s…married? He’s brought his wife.” He said and Harry couldn’t even suppress his smile.
“Are you sure?” He asked he asked with a pounding heart.
“Yes. He introduced her as such.” Gerard shrugged.
“Was she the most effortlessly beautiful woman you’d ever seen?” Harry asked, twinkles of adoration were already visible in his eyes.
“I couldn’t say…the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen is my wife.” He said and Harry grinned.
“That’s really good, mate.”
“Thank you, sir.” Gerard smiled timidly.
“Alright, I’ll go say hello.” Harry said and headed back to the large, bright dining room. He tried to be slow about it so that he could spot you first but you weren’t there. But he did see Caleb lingering near the bar, his eyes fixed on something else. He was alone, so he decided to approach him first. “Cal!” He called out to Caleb, who then turned quickly and immediately smiled. “It’s great to see you.” Harry stated with a bright, charismatic smile as he extended his hand to shake Caleb’s.
“Hey, likewise! Thanks for having us over.” He said as he shook Harry’s hand quickly. Harry smiled a bit brighter as he pulled his hand back, he didn’t miss the detail of Caleb thanking him for having “us” over. Maybe you were here.
Harry was about to respond when a bright color in his peripheral vision diverged his attention from Caleb; he turned in it’s direction and he swore that the earth stood still as he saw you descending into the dining area. You were a vision. Your beauty and confidence commanded the attention of the room, he swore everyone grew silent as you looked around with a kind smile on your lips, eyes darting around to find a familiar face. Finally your eyes met his and he was fighting against every instinct that made him want to rush over to you with a smile so wide it hurt.
Harry felt the air being stolen from his lungs at the sight of you in that gorgeous gown and the way it framed your body. You looked sensational and his fingers were itching to get to touch your skin again. He longed to trace all of the spots that were exposed on you with his lips, kissing at you delicately and with reverie. He had no idea how he would be able to not just stare at you all evening long, it would certainly be a challenge. He was already shaking off the sinful thoughts he was having of you as you approached.
“Ah, perfect timing!” Caleb’s voice called him back down to reality, “Harry, this is Y/N, my wife. Sweetheart, this is Harry Styles, CEO of the firm.” Cal introduced you two. You were smiling up at him cooly, but he could see the sparkles in your eyes as they met his own once more. And oh…? Were you using the triangle method on him? Harry couldn’t help but gently bite down on his lip as his eyes glanced down to yours briefly.
“Mr. Styles, it’s wonderful to finally meet you.” You said to him as you extended your hand and he was gentle as he took your hand in his and gave it a shake.
“You as well, Y/N. Call me Harry, I insist.” He said with what he imagined was a polite smile, but to you he looked like a kid who was trying too hard to keep a secret to themselves. You wanted to hug him and it was almost cruel to have to pretend like you didn’t know of each other.
“Alright. Thank you, Harry.” You said and he smiled and nodded.
“Can I offer you guys a drink?” He asked and you were the first to nod.
“Please.” You said quietly, but with zeal.
*********
You nearly had a cardiac event when you saw that Harry was already with Caleb when you walked in. You were hoping to at least have something to hang on to prior to interacting with Harry. It excited you that he was so excited to see you, or so it seemed! You were just as thrilled to see him, even just feeling the warmth of his hand in yours made you start to spark up from the inside out. Your throat suddenly felt dry and you needed a drink, so you were quick to accept when he offered to head to the bar.
“What can I get you, Harry?” The man at the bar asked with a smile.
“Just a whisky highball for me-”
“Make it two, please.” You spoke up and he glanced to you with a small smile.
“2 whisky highballs and for you, sir?” He asked Caleb.
“A scotch, neat.”
“Coming right up.” The guy said and turned to start on their drinks.
“Well it’s good to meet some fellow whisky lovers.” Harry said, sparking up some conversation.
“Right! I got lucky with this one! Usually women can’t handle whisky.” Cal added and you saw how Cal’s mildly sexist statement made Harry furrow his brows a bit.
“I don’t think it’s so much a sex thing, it’s just the flavor is definitely one to train your palate for. Everyone struggles with it a bit at first.” Harry said and you nodded in agreement. “I mean, in my experience, women handle their liquor far better than any men I know.” Harry added and you smiled.
“I have to agree with Harry. Don’t see too many women forgetting to be decent human beings after a drink or two.” You said and Harry chuckled, but you could feel Cal’s unamused glance on you for a moment. “Well anyway, your house is gorgeous, by the way. Can’t wait to see it in the daylight.” You complimented and he nodded.
“Oh, so you two plan on staying tonight?” Harry asked with an arch in his eyebrows, his eyes quickly finding yours until Cal spoke up.
“Yeah, we’re staying. I want to let loose tonight and I do not trust her driving my Quattroporte.” Cal chuckled and you let out a fake chuckle, but Harry didn’t miss as you rolled your eyes.
“Well I hope you’ll enjoy the stay. I mean, if you’re early risers, the sunrise is definitely something you don’t want to miss.” Harry said, his eyes meeting yours briefly.
“Here is the scotch neat.” The bartender said and when Caleb leaned forward to grab his drink you and Harry smiled at each other briefly, “And the two whisky highballs.” He added, causing you both to turn and also reach for your drinks. You all took a moment to try your drinks and you hummed.
“This is excellent. Thank you so much.” You complimented the bar tender.
“Thank you, enjoy.” He said before turning around to clean his area a bit.
“Well, now I know who to invite to the whisky bars.” Harry said with a charming smile and Cal chuckled.
“Definitely! We do know some pretty great ones in the city, don’t we sweetheart?” He turned to you and you nodded.
“Yeah. Haven’t been in a while but I’m sure they’re still stand up places.” You assured.
“What do you mean? We just went right around easter!” Cal looked at you incredulously and you knew that wasn’t true because he hadn’t been around consistently until the summer.
“Maybe you’ve gone with someone else more recently.” You said to him and his eyebrows furrowed, “A client or a friend perhaps, we haven’t gone there together since…at least a year ago.” You pointed out and he frowned a bit.
“Oh, you’re right…yeah, I think I went with someone else. Sorry, sweets.” He said and you smiled and shook your head.
“S’alright. You deal with lots of people so the outings blur together, I’m sure.” You assured him and he chuckled and nodded.
“Yeah. Ummm, I’m gonna go to the bathroom real quick, can you hold this for me?” Caleb asked you and you nodded.
“Sure.”
“When I’m back I’ll introduce you to everyone else.” He assured before he excused himself to you and Harry and then hurried off. As soon as he was gone you put down Cal’s drink on the bar top as you felt the tension between you and Harry becoming palpable. You turned around to say something to him when another woman walked up to both of you.
“Excuse me, Harry?” She said and he turned his attention to the young woman who had walked up.
“Hey, Tamika! Glad you could make it!” He greeted her happily with a hug. She then proceeded to introduce her girlfriend, Giselle to Harry as well.
“This place is incredible, thank you so much for inviting us.” Giselle said and he nodded with a smile.
“Of course, happy to have you guys here! Ummm, let me also introduce you guys to Y/N, Cal is her husband.” He said and Tamika’s eyes widened.
“Oh wow! I didn’t know Cal had gotten married. Congratulations! I’m Tamika, this is my girlfriend, Giselle.” She greeted and you smiled.
“Oh yeah, thanks! Nice to meet you Tamika and Giselle.” You said, extending a hand to one and then the other.
“Tamika is my intern/assistant. She’s the top business student at NYU and she’s just finishing up her undergrad.” Harry bragged and you smiled.
“Oh wow, congrats! Are you thinking about grad school?” You asked Tamika, who nodded.
“Yeah! Applications are due soon and I’m just trying to narrow down my options.” She explained to you.
“You know Y/N, Tamika is interested in USC…” Harry mentioned to you with a small, suggestive grin and your eyebrows arched up.
“Are you really?” You asked as you turned back to her and she nodded.
“Yeah, but it’s so competitive so I’m keeping my options open.” She explained.
“Well I ummm, I actually went to Marshall for my MS degrees. So I have connections, I still keep in touch with a lot of the faculty there. I can certainly put in a good word for you if you decide to apply.”
“Wait. Are you serious?” She asked with shock in her eyes and Giselle was just as shocked.
“Completely serious! I mean, if Harry’s working with you I’m sure it shows a lot of promise and potential. USC would be lucky to have you.” You said with a smile.
“Yes, she’ll take any help you can give her. I’m going there so please anything to help us reunite!” Giselle cut in and you all chuckled.
“I’ll give you one of my business cards before you leave, that way you can reach out to me when you apply. I’m sure I can set up a little meet and greet with someone on the admissions board.” You said to her.
“Wow, yes I would love that. Thank you so much.”
“Yeah, of course. What about you Giselle?” You asked her and then she went on to explain that she was actually also going to USC but to the Thornton School of Music, it was her first semester. This gave them all something more to talk about before Cal returned. Caleb seemed to have good rapport with Tamika, which aided in allowing you and Harry to continue stealing glances of each other as they spoke.
But soon enough Caleb was excusing you both from Harry’s side and taking you around introducing you to a few others. He wasn’t really flaunting you like he said he wanted to though, something was off with him. You couldn’t put your finger on it, but he seemed distracted even, leaving you to do most of the talking to his coworkers while he just darted his eyes around the room. It was hard to focus on the people you were meeting when you could feel Harry’s gaze burning into you from across the room. It was making it hard to focus on the people who kept asking you questions about yourself and trying to hide their surprise as Caleb introduced you as his wife. Obviously, you knew about Cal omitting this information from Harry and from Gerard earlier, but it was getting to you the more it happened.
“Hey Cal, nice to see you!”
“Hey Amir! Likewise.” He said shaking the man’s hand.
“Thanks. This is my son, Louay. He is interested in business so I brought him along to show him how we reap the rewards of it.” He chuckled, smiling at the young man with pride. “And who’s this lovely lady on your arm?” Amir asked and Cal turned to you for a moment.
“Uh, this is my wife, Y/N.” He said and you politely extended your hand out to him. But Amir’s eyes rounded out as his eyebrows arched up in surprise.
“Oh wow! I had no idea you were married!” He said with a bright smile and shook your hand. You felt Cal’s wary gaze on you but just continued smiling at Amir as you greeted him and then his son. But Cal knew you well enough to notice the anger and frustration that were radiating off of you. You made some small talk with Amir and Louay and were interrupted by one of the staff announcing that dinner was about to be served. You glanced towards the table and your eyes met Harry’s who quickly glanced at the seats nearest to where you were before looking back at you. He wanted to sit beside you…but how? Unless you or him sat in the middle…which just wasn’t going to work.
“Cal, project leader, come here man.” Harry called and Cal grabbed your hand and pulled you along. You bit your lip as you thought of something and then slipped your hand out of his and he turned around and your eyes met.
“What’s the matter?” He asked and you gave him a look of irritation.
“Why’re your coworkers so shocked to meet me, Cal?” He sighed.
“Not now, Y/N.” He said lowly, pleading eyes on yours as you crossed your arms stubbornly.
“I don’t want to sit beside you.” You said and he sighed.
“Fine.” He accepted before he turned around to walk the few feet to the table, but you sped ahead of him.
“You can sit beside him, Harry.” You said and then took a seat beside a woman named Andrea. She’d been a bit shy, but you felt better knowing Harry was beside you and Tamika was settling in across from you. As soon as he scooted his chair in you felt his thigh brushing up against yours; it was a tight fit around the table, so you were all a bit close. Your lips twitched up in a smile when he glanced at you quickly. He spread his legs further and you nudged at him a bit, trying to keep a straight face. Caleb was distracted talking to the person on his left and so Harry reached off to the side, as if he was going to grab his chair, but then you felt his fingers just graze the outside of your thigh. The slit on your dress leaving your skin exposed and available for him to touch. You let out a breathy giggle and his lips twitched up in a small grin. When you glanced up at him through your lashes he bit his lip for a second.
“I wish I could have you as my main course.” He whispered with a smirk and then placed his hands back on the tabletop. Your body tingled as a chill passed through you, you wished that you could touch him at the very least. Every now and again your thighs would brush, but he was mostly talking to Caleb and you were just focused on your food because if you looked at Harry you would end up doing something stupid in front of all these people.
When the first course was brought in you smiled excitedly at just how beautiful and delicious the starter looked. It was a miso citrus salad, your mouth watered at the fresh scent emanating from the dish. And then you felt a gaze on you and you quickly looked up and your eyes met with the girl sitting at Tamika’s left, as soon as your eyes met her gaze flitted off to something else. Over and over it was happening, you kept making awkward eye contact with her. Finally you got the chance to look at her while something else had her attention; you wanted to see if maybe you knew each other from somewhere. you observed the slightly pained look in her eyes and the small frown on her lips. So you followed her line of sight and stopped at Harry, but he was leaned down eating his food. And when you leaned back a bit and saw Cal mirroring this woman’s expression the realization hit you like a ton of bricks. That was her! His mistress. Suddenly you lost your grip on your fork and it clanked against the porcelain plate loudly several times, causing everyone to look at you. You blinked a few times and forced a smile.
“Sorry, butter fingers.” You excused and everyone chuckled before they resumed their previous actions. You look down at your plate of food and suddenly felt disgusted by the fish and vegetables that had been unbelievably appetizing just moments before. Harry cleared his throat and you turned to him.
“Are you alright?” He asked lowly
“I ummm…I think so. I just…” you started and then just shook your head, “Never mind.” You smiled and forced yourself to have a bit more food. Thankfully, there was a nice break between the main course and dessert and so you took that time to go to the room and grab a business card for Tamika from your purse. You were just putting your wallet away when you heard the bedroom door open. You had hoped it was Harry, but when you heard the door click shut behind you quietly you knew it was Caleb.
“Are you upset at me?” His voice was soft and had a hint of caution to it.
“You’ve been seeing someone else and she’s here tonight, isn’t she?” You said instead as you turned around, hands on your hips. You just wanted to know how much there was to it. You were ready to face this right now.
“Y/N-”
“She’s the only person you haven’t introduced me to, but she keeps looking at me from across the table and I saw how you two looked at each other-”
“She didn’t know I was married.” He said immediately and a sardonic smile came onto your lips.
“No one did! Apparently.” You said with irritation as you threw your hands up in irritation and he came closer to you.
“Look, we can be rational about this-”
“I think I’m responding pretty rationally to this situation, Caleb. Everyone thinks we’re fucking newly weds when I’ve given almost a decade of my life to you! We’ve been married seven years and you’ve been hiding it from people for three years?! Do you have any idea how this makes me feel? Why did you even ask me come tonight?” You questioned him and his lips dropped into a small frown.
Maybe you didn’t love him like before, but having to hear over and over that no one knew about you was embarrassing and it was shaking your confidence to some extent. Why had he hidden your marriage so vehemently from everyone? Was it really just to be able to fuck around or was he ashamed of you for some reason? The not knowing was clawing at you horribly.
“I’m sorry. I just like to keep my personal life as separate as possible from my work and-”
“OK, that’s complete bullshit! Why would you do something as personal as fucking a coworker if you wanted to keep the personal and professional separate?” You challenged his rationale and he ran his hand down his face, a physical sign of his stress weighing him down.
“Y/N, I don’t think this is the time and place to talk about this.” He said cooly.
“Then I’d like to leave so we can discuss this at home.” You said with finality.
“I don’t want to go yet, Y/N. And I know I’m in no position to ask this of you, but I’d like to get my thoughts together before we talk about this. It’s…it’s a lot.” He said and you rolled your lips together as you felt your eyes starting to well up a bit as your simmering anger started to reach its boiling point.
“Fine.” You said softly and just walked past him and out of the bedroom.
You closed the door behind you and just took a deep breath and exhaled it slowly to calm down. You hated so much that you cried when you were angry, but the emotion was just not one you felt often enough to know how to deal with it properly. You squeezed your eyes shut for a second to will the frustration away, but you were absolutely humiliated. It was believable and even excusable for Harry not to have known Cal was married. One typically does not to talk about their personal business with their boss, but to blatantly lie to everyone else he worked with and communicated with day to day? That was something else. Once you were calm enough you made your way back to the dining area. As soon as you sat down you felt the woman from across the table looking at you. You just glanced up to her, catching her gaze for a few seconds and she went beet red before looking away.
You could only imagine how she felt having to see you there. He lied to her too and by the looks of it, she hadn’t taken it well. Suddenly everything started falling into place…the reason for why two months ago out of the blue Cal was home more and loving on you even more and spending time with you…something had happened between them and ruined the relationship, if he had been with her this entire time. He could’ve been with multiple people to your knowledge.
“Is everything alright?” Harry’s voice pulled you from your thoughts and you turned your head to him and shook your head.
“Is there another room I can stay in tonight? Or even just a motel or something nearby? I don’t want to be here anymore, Harry. I need to be as far away from Cal as possible.” You said softly and he frowned.
“Uh yeah, there are bedrooms upstairs as well. But I can find out about a motel nearby if you’d prefer that.” He offered. You saw Cal returning to the room from your peripherals.
“I’ll let you know.” You said before you turned back to the table and grabbed your cocktail and drank the remainder in one go.
Shortly after, dessert was being placed before you all. It was a gorgeous tiramisu, one of your favorites, but you only picked at it for a bit, not really in the mood to eat or to chat with anyone any more. Harry would’ve probably talked to you, but Cal was engaged in a never-ending conversation with Harry so that he could constantly keep an eye on you; you could feel Cal’s scrutinous gaze on you. You just felt like the odd one out and you wanted this night to be over.
Even when you all migrated to a lounge room to chat you noticed that he had tried and failed several times to approach this other woman. After about the third attempt Cal just started ordering drinks with reckless abandon and eventually headed off with a couple others to the billiard room, or at least that’s what you heard from their loud and drunken conversation. Harry was busy bidding farewell to those who were heading home for the night. It looked like Tamika was getting ready to go and you’d been meaning to chat with her again, but the woman from across the table had been with her the whole time. But as of now, she was nowhere to be found so you approached Tamika and Giselle before she returned from wherever she had gone to.
“Are you guys heading off as well?” You asked the two.
“Yeah. I’ve got a big exam on Monday that I need to study for tomorrow.” Tamika explained.
“Oh OK, best of luck! Ummm here’s my card though. If you decide to apply to Marshall let me know and like I said earlier, I’d be happy to help you network with the recruiters and faculty.” You reaffirmed.
“That’s just really kind of you, Y/N. Thank you so much. If there’s anything I can do to repay you for this-”
“Oh my gosh, no Tamika! If you decide to go there just keep doing your very best, that’s all.” You said, “Of course if only to make me look good…” You joked with a giggle, despite your low mood, and Tamika and Giselle laughed along with you.
“You’re too sweet. I hope Cal brings you around more!” She said and you just nodded and smiled, “If he doesn’t I’ll badger him about it.” She added with a playfully menacing tone and you just chuckled.
“You guys are all great, I’m glad I was able to come along tonight.” You said genuinely. You were about to ask them how far their drive was when Tamika lit up a bit.
“Dani!” Tamika called out as she looked past you and waved at the person she was calling over. You turned around and saw that, that was the woman from across the table and she looked petrified, “Come here!” Tamika insisted and you swallowed thickly as she made her way over. Her eyes darted around the room, probably trying to find Caleb, but he was drunk and playing pool in another room of the house. When she was finally within reach, Tamika dragged her into her side, “Dani, this is Y/N. She’s Caleb’s wife!” She informed her excitedly and you saw in real time how Dani’s face started to pale as she swallowed thickly, which could only mean one thing. You looked around, trying to act quickly before she puked all over you, her friends, and herself. Finally, you saw a garbage can near the entrance of the room and just grabbed her hand and dragged her over to it. You had just put it in her hands when she started to throw up. You looked away, starting to feel disgusted at the sounds of her heaving and Tamika and Giselle rushed over to her.
“Wow, good save.” Giselle said to you and you just nodded as you turned to Giselle with a relieved expression.
“Yeah, I’d know that look anywhere.” You said as Tamika rubbed over her friend’s back as she just spat the taste out of her mouth. Dani’s tearful eyes met yours and you just offered her a sympathetic smile. Poor woman.
“Thank you.” She rasped out and you nodded.
“Yeah, of course.” You assured her. Just then Harry walked in and his eyes widened a bit upon seeing you four huddled up at the entrance of the room.
“Harry, have you got some mouth wash and pepto or something for Dani? She got sick to her stomach.” Tamika explained to him and he nodded.
“Yeah, of course! Follow me.” He said and they went off with him, trash can and all.
“If her boyfriend comes back can you tell him we’ll meet him in the foyer?” Giselle asked you and you nodded.
“Yeah, of course.” You said with a smile and a nod.
“Thank you. And it was so nice to meet you, thank you for being so kind.” Giselle said as she hugged you briefly.
“It’s no problem at all! Drive safe.” You said and she thanked you as she hurried off to catch up with Tamika. It was just moments later when the man who had been sitting beside the person you now knew as Dani, came into the room and glanced around. “You’re Dani’s boyfriend?” You asked him and he nodded. “She had something to take care of with Harry and Tamika, they told me to tell you that they will meet you in the foyer.”
“Oh, cool. Thanks.” He smiled before hurrying out of the room.
There were just a few more people in the room you were in, but they were laughing and chatting amongst themselves, so you were once again the odd one out. You decided to head off to the bedroom you’d been given and just get the toiletries you had unpacked back into your bag so that you could be ready to relocate. A few light knocks on the door caught your attention and you hurried over to open it. You saw Gerard standing there with a polite smile.
“Good evening, Miss. Mr. Styles informed me that you wanted to change your sleeping arrangements?” He asked and you nodded.
“Yes, please.” You said and he nodded.
“Certainly. He mentioned that you wanted a bit of space. I can offer you a bedroom upstairs? I called the motels in town and they are all booked out unfortunately.” He explained.
“Upstairs is just fine.” You assured him with a smile, “Thank you, Gerard.”
“Not a problem. Can I take your bag for you?”
“Oh no, it’s alright. Just show me where to go.”
“No Miss, I insist.” He said and you smiled at him as you grabbed your overnight bag and handed it to him and he smiled, “Wonderful, follow me.” He said and you followed him through the house. You could hear the absurd commotion from the billiard room and just rolled your eyes as you followed Gerard upstairs. The lights on the sconces were dimmed, but you could still see how beautiful everything was. “I’m going to give you the room that Mr. and Mrs. Styles stay in when they visit from England.” He informed you, “You’ll have a balcony and a lovely view of the water from it.”
“Oh wow, thank you. I hear the sunrises are to die for.” You hummed.
“They certainly are captivating.” He agreed with you. He opened up the door when you finally arrived and he switched on the lights. Your eyes widened at the beautiful, modern set up of the room. You swore you had seen this room on Pinterest or something. A king sized bed, all to yourself? Yes, please. You thought as you smiled.
“This is amazing.” You said as you looked around. Gerard had just set your bag down on the little bench in front of the bed.
“I’m glad it’s to your satisfaction. Now the lights can be controlled with this remote.” He explained, showing it to you and then placing it back down on the bench. “And your bathroom is through there.” He said pointing to a door in the far right of the bedroom, “There’s a small cabinet by the shower that contains extra towels and washcloths, you can just leave them in the hamper if you use anything. The closet is in there as well. And the balcony is just through those doors.” He said pointing to the double glass doors that were partially covered by some long, floor length curtains.
“Perfect, thank you.”
“My pleasure. And, I am sorry if I contributed to any unpleasantness between you and Mr. Hargrove. I had no intent to stir up-”
“Oh my god, no.” you pouted at him in endearment, “Don’t feel bad about a thing, Gerard. Frankly it’s…been a long time coming. It wasn’t because of you.” You assured him, “I appreciate your help tonight.” You smiled at him.
“Is there anything else I can do for you before I head out for the night?” He asked.
“Can you just thank Harry for me? Just for, indulging me.” You said with a small smile.
“Certainly.” He nodded.
“Thank you, again for all your help. Good night.” You smiled at him.
“Good night, Miss.” he said before hurrying out of the room.
Once you were alone you dimmed down the bedroom lights before drawing the heavy curtains and slipping out onto the balcony. You shivered for a few seconds as you adjusted to the slightly cooler temperature outside as you leaned against the railing of the balcony. The lack of light from the bedroom helped you see the starry sky even better. And you sighed in relief as you could hear the waves crashing into the shore not too far off in the distance. The peace and silence in your brain lasted for just a few minutes.
You just couldn’t stop thinking about Dani now…how she literally threw up at the sight of you. She probably felt awful and guilty and you wished you could just tell her that you weren’t angry at her. That you didn’t blame her. She had been deceived just as much as you had. What was frustrating for you was that you were completely in the dark about Cal. You thought you knew the man you were married to, but evidently that wasn’t the case. It didn’t even matter what you lost at this point, there was no way of moving past something like this. Your marriage was through…both of you had cheated now, so what was the point?
The sound of a door closing startled you and you whipped around quickly and saw Harry leaning back on the bedroom door. He offered you a timid smile as he started to walk across the space, but it was contagious to see his smile widening the closer he came. He met you out on the balcony and as soon as he was before you he sighed in relief and grabbed your hands.
“You look absolutely divine. You’re exquisite. Literal perfection.” He hummed softly, “Been dying to tell you all night.” He complimented you. His voice was soft as he spoke to you and you smiled at him coyly.
“Thank you.” Was all you could say as every other thought in your head vanished as you stood before him. Finally.
“Want to talk about what happened?” He asked you.
“I probably should.” You said and he smiled.
“I’ll listen if you want me to.” He assured you and you sighed.
“So obviously no one knew Cal was married and like…I don’t know, it got to me. Like I just feel humiliated a bit. Like…I don’t know if he did it on purpose to just, push me over the edge? But like, how did he expect people to react? And I think…well, I know now actually, that he’s been sleeping with some woman named Dani.” Harry looked surprised, “I don’t know for how long or if there’s more. She’d been avoiding me all night and Tamika introduced us and she just…got sick. I mean, she obviously didn’t know he was married and god, she probably feels like the worst person, you know?” You said with a frown. “Like how could he do that to someone? Poor woman.” You shook your head.
“So you’re upset that the other woman is feeling guilty.” He asked with a small smile and you shrugged.
“I know how insane that makes me sound but like…she didn’t know about me. That’s not fair to her. And like, I’ve at least known for a bit and have made peace with it…but who knows how she found out that she was the other woman. From the way he’s been acting I’d say it wasn’t good.”
“So what now?” Harry asked. You knew that his question was a lot more complex than how he posed it. There were subliminal implications that were being addressed without him having to ask them directly and it made you feel just a little bit better about all of this. He still cared. Whether his interest in you was platonic, solely carnal, or even romantic, he was asking because he wanted to know what this could mean for you two.
“Cal said he wants to talk about it after he gathers his thoughts because “it’s a lot”, or something like that.” You responded as you turned back to the vast darkness ahead of you.
“Do you think he wants to end it?” Harry asked cautiously.
“I have no idea, but I want to end it.” You said with certainty and well, Harry had no business feeling happy about that (selfishly, of course) but he remained composed with a slight furrow in his brow as he listened to you, “I mean, what’s the point of this sham of a marriage?” You asked through a sardonic laugh. “He’s been unfaithful for who knows how long, I’ve stopped letting myself love him and have also…committed adultery. Thank you very much for that, by the way.” You added with a teasing grin and a side glance, he smirked in response.
“Happy to be of service. By the way.” He replied haughtily and you both laughed softly. “So you…you want a divorce?” He asked to clarify and you nodded.
“I first thought about it after we spent the night together.” You shared, “I just…realized how much of my own heart had been out of it to like…go through with what we did and not feel remorse or anything close to it. But then he started trying again and so I took that card off of the table. But now that I’ve learned he’s been lying to everyone and living a double life I feel like I’m married to a stranger. Like who was I kidding? This has been over for a long time. So stupid…” You sighed in disappointment.
“You’re not stupid. A marriage is a huge commitment. Of course you’re going to try if you see him trying. But hey, now you’ve seen all the facets of the situation and you’ve made a choice for yourself, yeah?”
“Yeah.” You responded softly.
“Are you…are you alright?”
“Yeah, I think so. Just…letting the reality of it all sink in.” You said before exhaling. The exhale felt cathartic, like all your troubles would be gone soon just like that little puff of air released from your lungs. The silence between you two was nice, only the sounds of the waves on the shore were detectable and it was perfect.
“Can I…hold you?” He asked, breaking the silence and you nodded up at him and he turned and stepped closer as he opened up his arms and you stepped into his embrace. You inhaled deeply as your head rested against his shoulder and his arms squeezed tight around your body, “What can I do to make you feel better?” He asked and you smiled.
“This.” You assured and he smiled, “This is perfect. I needed a hug after this shit show of a night.” You hummed and he smiled as he let his cheek rest atop of your head. A comfortable silence settled over you both before you spoke up.
“I’m sorry it sucked so much for you, but it was kind of perfect for me.” He shared and you smiled, “I threw this party just…hoping Cal would bring you along. It was a fucking long shot but he did!” he chuckled and you did as well, “And now you’re here and I couldn’t be more pleased.” He said happily. You could hear the smile in his voice.
“I didn’t know you were throwing the party until we were about to arrive.” You confessed and he chuckled, “He had said it was with a few work friends, so I had accepted because I was just excited to meet some people Cal worked with. He told me to look sexy so he could "show me off”. When I found out about this being your party I was scared that you’d think I was just trying to seduce you by showing up like this.” You said and he chuckled.
“I know we don’t know each other that well, but I know that’s not how you are.” He said and you smiled.
“Yeah, definitely not.” You assured.
“You do look sensational though, you definitely met the mark.” He said and you chuckled a bit before you both just settled into the comfortable silence. He felt like a friend you’d known for ages. He was a person who you could be your authentic self around. It was rare to feel so safe with someone.
“Harry…do you think there’s any left over tiramisu?” You asked randomly, “S’my favorite dessert but I couldn’t really stomach mine when they served it.” You explained and you felt his body shake a bit as he chuckled.
“S’my favorite too so I know they made extra if only for me to take it home.” He responded, the smile he was wearing made evident by the tone of his voice. “Wanna get changed or get down there like this?” He asked.
“I think change first. Don’t want to risk getting the dress dirty…knowing me, I eat like a child.” You said and he chuckled as he gave you a bit harder of a squeeze before he started to let go.
“Alright then. I’ll change as well and ummm, I’ll come by and get you, yeah?”
“OK.” You smiled. You walked back in with him and left him at the bedroom door before he was off down the hall. You watched him until he turned around and gave you a final smile as he disappeared behind the last door down the hall.
You proceeded to slip back into your own room and got your pajamas out of your bag. You also decided to get your makeup off while you were at it and were just toning your face when there were a few knocks on the door. You hurried over and opened it up to let him in.
“Just need to get my moisturizer on and then we can go.” You said and he nodded and followed you inside. He busied himself with closing up the balcony and just waiting for you at the foot of the bed. “Ready.” You said as you came out of the bathroom and he smiled and started guiding you down stairs. Upon making it down you guys could hear the muffled sounds of the others who had stayed in the billiard room. It was nearing 1am and they were drunk, so hopefully they passed out quickly. Harry guided you down a dark hallway before he pushed open a swinging door and switched on the lights. You had to blink a few times to adjust your vision, but then he switched on a warmer pair before getting the fluorescent ones off.
“God, I forget how bright these are.” He whinged and you giggled.
“This is like a proper restaurant kitchen.” You hummed as you looked around.
“Yeah, I usually use this home for holidays. Obviously, we don’t want to do the cooking then so we hire a chef for when we stay here. Or we do a lot of parties here as well, so again, it’s just convenient for how it’s used.” He explained as he headed over to the refrigerator and then he turned around quickly, “By “we” I mean my parents and other family.” He clarified and you chuckled.
“I figured. Gerard mentioned something to me about how the room he gave me is your parents’ favorite room to stay in or something?”
“Yeah.” He smiled and then looked through it to find the extra serving of the cake and he finally did and pulled it out. “Here we are.” He said and put it down on the counter before grabbing some forks, “Are we being civilized or eating from the container?” He inquired.
“Whatever you think is best. But be warned that I might feel like I need to eat it all if we have it in the container.” You joked and he chuckled.
“Plates it is…” he played along and you giggled as he just grabbed one from a nearby cabinet, “We can share.” He said as he came back over and you sighed as he started digging into the surface of the cake to break off a piece for you two.
“Fine…” you accepted dramatically and he smirked. Without even asking he just stopped and pulled his fork further back to make the slice larger, which caused you to laugh softly. “I was joking.” You clarified and his eyes drew away from his task and met yours knowingly.
“No you weren’t.” He said with a grin and you just laughed. Once he got that done he put the container back in the fridge and when he turned he found you already digging your fork into the cake. “Didn’t even have the decency to wait?” He scoffed jokingly and you grinned.
“It looks incredible.”
“Yet you wasted a perfectly good slice at dinner…” he quipped back and you groaned and tossed your head back dramatically.
“I’m sorry!” You croaked out and he laughed and instinctually reached his arm out to wrap it around you and pull you into him. You went with him easily and when you glanced up at him he was smiling down at you.
“It’s alright, I forgive you.” He said softly and your lips curled up in an easy smile.
“There’s like…a vibe between us right? Like I’m not delusional, right?” You asked and you saw him flush a bit but he nodded.
“Yeah, definitely.” He said and you giggled.
“To there being a vibe with us or that I’m delusional?” You asked and his smile widened as he realized what he’d said and he chuckled, his eyes darted away from yours briefly out of the nerves he felt tickling through his body. Then there they were again, those gorgeous green eyes meeting yours again. They were so vibrant despite his widened pupils, a tell tale sign of his attraction. You wondered how big your pupils were right now.
“The vibe.” He clarified meekly and you hummed.
“I don’t know, but it just feels like I’ve known you for a really long time. It’s really nice.” You said with a simple shrug.
“Maybe we’ve met in other lives.” He said quietly.
“That’d be pretty cool actually.” You responded with a pensive look on your face. “Am I allowed to kiss you?” You asked him and he instantly bit his lip as he nodded and started to lean down. You started to press up on your toes to meet him halfway. It felt extraordinary to feels his smooth, warm lips pressing into yours gently.
And when you pulled back the smack of your lips felt like it echoed and your eyes blinked open and then his did as well. This hungry look was exchanged between you, practically forcing you to kiss again. And again, and again, and again in quick little pecks. After the next one he just groaned and smeared his mouth against yours sloppily before pushing his tongue into your mouth. You moaned at the intensity at which he came into it. Your skin was littered in goosebumps and a delicious tingle shot down your spine to your toes and then flew back up to your core. You sighed in pleasant surprise as your pussy’s muscles tightened up and fluttered around absolutely nothing at all in response to his hands sliding up under your flowy pajama shirt, sliding up your back and then scratching down it with a bit of force.
Your hands fisted at his shirt almost as if the action tethered you to reality. You loved the place your mind went to when you were around him. Again, a feeling of safety came to mind and you kissed him back harder and reached for his arms and pushed them down to feel your bottom. As soon as he got there he took over, feeling groping, squeezing your butt like he’d wanted to all night. He also wanted to kiss that little sliver of your lower back that was peeking out of the cutout on the dress you wore.
“Can I pick you up?” He mumbled and you nodded before huffing out a yes. He reached down to your thighs and picked you up before placing you on the counter. His hands were on your face holding you still as he licked into you slowly, savoring your taste just in case your paths didn’t cross for a while again. “Can I go down on you?” His deep voice rasped out, lips smearing against yours as he spoke into the kiss. Your widening smile interrupted your kiss, “What?”
“I’m just…so happy to hear you ask that. Been getting off to the memory of how fucking good you are at that. I came so many times I think I saw God.” You laughed softly and he grinned.
“Like that you think of me when you play with yourself. I do too.” He confessed. “One time I even…said your name when I was with someone else.” He said and you winced.
“Ouch…how’d they take it?”
“Not too good.” He chuckled, “When we slept together…it was way too good.” He said with a reminiscent grin.
“Yeah, like oddly perfect!”
“Right. Like you were made for me. We fit so well.” He said as one of his hands came off your face and rubbed over the crotch of your shorts quickly. You sighed and parted your legs further, giving him more access to your achingly needy pussy. “Do you have underwear on?” He asked and you shook your head. He smiled and slid his fingers into your shorts through the leg opening. He rubbed over your sticky and swollen crease before wedging his fingers into it and swirling around your clit in slow and steady circles. You exhaled slowly in satisfaction, grinding your hips against him, getting yourself even more wet for him, he loved hearing it almost as much as feeling it, “God you’re so fucking wet for me.” He smiled and you hummed.
“Mhmm…Ready for a taste?” You asked and he nodded, “Go on then.” You encouraged him and he kissed you once more before dragging your shorts down by the elastic band. You lifted your hips up to help him out and he just dropped them on the ground as he crouched down and spread you open wider before delving in without a second to waste. You moaned in satisfaction as his thick, warm tongue lapped over your sensitive clit, catching just at the top of your opening every time he licked up. Your toes curled and your fingers dug in his hair as the edge of your orgasm caught you by surprise, hitting you almost as quickly as a strike of lightening. “Oh fuck, don’t stop! Don’t stop! I’m going to…I’m going to come!” You gasped out as you pushed his head closer, you were desperate and impressed by just how quickly your yearning for him caused your undoing. Harry sped up his licks and after one, two, and three accurate and precise licks right to your throbbing little clit your thighs started to tremble and your breathing to hitch a few times before you just moaned out his name. He moaned into you, staying true to his mission as you ground your pussy against his face, drawing your orgasm out, shivering as he kept licking at your clit like that until you felt like you were on fire. You stopped breathing for several moments, the feeling stunning your existence into a pause. Harry’s breathy chuckles against you interrupted the pleasure.
“Breathe, baby.” He reminded and your inhaled sharply.
“Fuck keep going!” You demanded, he didn’t hesitate before delving back in, this time sucking at your clit until you were trembling again, moaning in ecstasy as that double orgasm swept you into an orgasmic oblivion. Your ears rung and your brows furrowed as those magnificent and addicting feelings coursed through every inch of your body. “Thank you! Fuck that’s so fucking good…” you praised and he hummed against you, making your tummy flutter as he started to reduce the intensity of his mouth on you as your orgasm started to dwindle. You swore there were little shocks randomly nipping at your legs and you started to massage his scalp after the hard grip you had on his silky hair. He kissed your clit before kissing your left thigh and pushing himself up to attach your lips together. You loved the taste of yourself on his tongue, it was erotic and made you feel so proud of yourself. “Mmm…wanna feel you inside me.” You mumbled and he sighed.
“Should we go upstairs? I don’t have a condom on me.” He muttered against your cheek before kissing you there.
“S’okay. Want it just like this, just you and me.” You said softly, your eyes flickered up to his so that he could clearly see your intent.
“Don’t tempt me like that, baby.” He shook his head with a devilish grin twitching his lips up to the left.
“M’serious! I got an IUD after I found out that Cal was cheating.” You shared and his eyebrows arched up.
“Oh…I mean, if you really want to. I don’t mind either way.” He assured you.
“I want it. Like really, really badly.” You grinned and he smiled.
“OK.” He stated decidedly. His lips pressed to yours once more and you started to tug at his shirt. He reared back to strip it from his body and he dropped it to the ground before reaching for the hem of yours. You raised your arms to aid him as he undressed you. He smiled and his hands went right to your breasts. He gave them a firm squeeze and you chuckled as he groaned in excitement. “Sorry, I just fucking love your body. Been dying to touch you again.” He breathed out and you smiled. His hands then slid down to your hips as you reached for his sweats. You needed him now.
You tugged at the white ties that were fastening the bottoms to him more snuggly. Once they were untied you tugged down on them until they just dropped down his legs on their own. Your mouth watered as his thick cock fell forward, bouncing a few times from how heavy he was. You immediately brought your hand up and spit into it before wrapping it around his tip, playing with it as he moaned in pleasure. You stroked up and dragged his foreskin to the tip before stroking down and sliding it back away from his thick and leaking head. He filled you up so fucking good, it was too good to be true…
“Please fuck me, Harry.” You begged, inciting an absolutely feral response in him and he nodded before he pulled you back down to the ground, turned your around, and guided his tip to your entrance. He rubbed through your sopping folds, enjoying just how aroused you got for him, he pressed himself against your entrance and you moaned in anticipation of being stretched open around his enviable girth. Your eyes were screwed shut as you waited for him to push in. He started to surge forward, opening your little hole up with his ragingly stiff cock. Once he got about halfway he reached into your hair with one hand and grabbed you tight at your hip with the other as he plunged the rest of the way in hard. You both moaned, shrouded in ecstasy at the feeling of him being inside of you again. You’d both been waiting, dreaming, longing to be connected this way again. He pushed you down into the counter to properly bend you over and you gasped as your bare chest was smooshed into the tiramisu, the ceramic plate scraped against the counter from the collision.
“The cake!” You laughed quietly and he chuckled, but proceeded with thrusting into you and started increasing his pace.
“Fuck you feel so good!” He hummed in delight, relishing in the feeling of your slick walls creating a feeling of suction and pressure around his pulsating erection. He’d been dreaming of having you again and this felt better than the last time because now he knew that you wanted him just as badly. He shifted a bit and then grinned as he heard you gasp when he plunged right against your spot; he couldn’t forget that. He loved just how easily you’d fall apart in pleasure when you were stimulated there.
“Fuck!” You exclaimed as he started to quickly thrust into it, making your legs feel like jello. You reached down and found your clit and you started to rub, making your eyes rolled back as a satisfied smile curled onto your lips. Your fingers were a blur as you rubbed tight little circles against your clit and your tummy started to clench up and then inevitably your inner muscles and walls started to contract around Harry’s cock. He choked out a moan and squeezed your hips hard as he started to thrust harder, you were seeing stars now, “I’m about to come!” You warned and he groaned.
“Come on then, baby. Cream all over my big cock. Show me how fucking good we are together.” He grunted markedly and you moaned a bit too loudly but neither of you had a single fuck to give as his filthy talk pushed you over the edge. You smiled and dropped your head back against his shoulder as you started to come undone. He held you up as your legs became all wobbly beneath you with the aftershocks of your orgasm. He wasn’t slowing down just yet though, his thrusts were getting harder and more erratic; you were impressed by the strength he had. “I’m so fucking close…shit!” He hissed and you tightened up despite your sensitivity and he moaned deeply, “Fuck…I’m right there, baby!”
“Come inside me.” You suddenly requested and he groaned, “Please, Harry.” You keened and he swore he was imagining it.
“Yeah? Want me to finish inside your delicious little pussy?” He panted and you nodded.
“Please. Want it all inside! Need to feel you coming inside.” You begged and he panted heavily.
“Fuck, I’m…oh fuck, I’m coming!” He mumbled quickly before surging his hips forward and then tugging your hips back against him. He ground his cock into you as you felt him twitching with each rope of come he was unloading deep inside of you. Harry swore he was about to lose consciousness from how hard his orgasm hit him. He felt his knees trembling and one of his hands came up over yours on the counter, interlacing your fingers while simultaneously gripping to the counter for support. His deep moans were vibrating deep into your soul, or at least it felt that way as his body was smushed right against yours.
You could feel his warmth filling you up until you felt a bit dripping down your sticky folds. Harry caught his breath as he held himself in you for a few moments before slowly pulling out of you. “Oh shit, s’a lot.” He muttered quietly, “Hang on to the counter for a sec.” he instructed and you nodded as he hurried to grab a hand towel from the counter behind them. When he returned he dabbed at your entrance.
“I swear I’m in another dimension.” You mumbled and he chuckled.
“Push a little bit for me.” He instructed. You did as you were told and he ran the towel over your swollen and throbbing pussy again, the fibers of it tickling you just a bit. You then felt him drag it down your right inner thigh, before he sunk to the ground and cleaned whatever had dripped down to the floor. “Good to go.” He said softly as he pressed a kiss to the small of your back, to that spot he’d been dying to kiss ever since he saw you.
He then got up and you turned around and he chuckled, your tits were certainly smeared over with mascarpone and coca powder. You shrieked as he lunged you onto the counter again and you grabbed the edge of it and squeezed as his lips found your already pebbled nipple and sucked it clean before licking over your supple breast, cleaning it of his favorite dessert. He hummed contently as he sucked a little mark against the the underside of it before moving over to the other one. Your fingers raked through his curls and you tugged a bit when he sucked at your nipple too harshly, pulling it into his mouth forcefully before biting down on it a bit until you giggled in slight discomfort until it dissolved into a moan and he smiled and popped off of it loudly. He chuckled and then kissed up your sternum, neck, jaw, and then your lips again. Your smile was sincere as he rubbed his forehead against yours a few times, making the moment feel a lot more intimate.
“Alright?” He asked you.
“Yeah, just still coming off it.” You assured him and he smiled.
“Good.” He hummed before closing his eyes and you did the same, just basking in the intimacy you shared until a thought crossed your mind.
“Once again I did not get my cake.” You sighed and he chuckled.
“Well you got something…” he joked and you sniggered, “Don’t worry, we’ll get you a new slice.” He assured you before planting a kiss on your cheek.
“Ummm…do you want to stay with me for a bit?” You asked timidly and he smiled.
“Definitely.” He confirmed.
So after getting dressed and getting another slice of the tiramisu, you were both making your way out of the kitchen quietly. You guys could still hear everyone else down the hall laughing and chatting animatedly, though you could tell they were all plastered. You made your way up the stairs and Harry dragged you down the hall to his bedroom, well it was more like a suite, so you cuddled up on to couch he had in front of the TV and you shared your cake as you watched Friends re-runs for a while.
“We should get you to bed.” You heard his voice through your drowsiness and yawned.
“Good idea.” You concurred, but you nuzzled closer to him instead of making a move to stand.
“Want me to carry you?” He asked and you smiled.
“If you really want to.”
“Yeah, come on then.”
But after attempting and failing a few times because you both couldn’t stop laughing or making a serious attempt he just had you hop on piggy back. You leaned on his shoulder and held on tight as he walked you down the long hall and to the other bedroom. He walked you into the bathroom to brush your teeth and waited for you in the room. When you returned, a bit more awake now after dealing with the cold water, you cooed as he had turned down the bed for you.
“Thank you, you’re too sweet.” You said caressing his cheek and he tutted.
“S’nothing. Get in.” He said and you did just that. The bed was as divine as it looked, you wanted one like this for yourself. He sat on the edge watching as you got comfy and once you were, you peered up to see him smiling down at you. Harry traced the high point of your cheekbone with his thumb, such a sweet and comforting gesture.
“I ummm, I just want you to know that this isn’t just a sex thing to me.” He said quietly, “Like I’m not nice to you with the intent to fuck you. I like what I’ve seen of you so far and I just want to be there for you, you know? I want to get to know you. And I know things could get a bit complicated if you and Cal end things, so ummm we can just be friends until you resolve that if you want?” He asked.
“I think that would be wise.” You accepted. “I like you too and I also want to get to know more of you and I just don’t want to fall into something complex that could…hurt you while I’m already in the middle of this mess.” You said with a smile and he nodded.
“Sounds good. And I mean, I’m sure it’ll be hard even if your hearts aren’t in it anymore, so you call me when you need me, yeah?” He asked and you smiled.
“I will.” You assured and he smiled as he reached for the bedside table and handed over your phone so you could unlock it. He put his number in before setting it down on the bedside table again.
“There it is. I’m sorry it started out as a weird night, but I hope I made it a bit better for you.” He hummed and you giggled.
“That’s the understatement of the century, Harry.” You pointed out and he grinned bashfully.
“Don’t want to be too cocky, you know?” He said humbly and you shook your head with a grin.
“Well yes, you made it better. Thank you again for everything tonight.” You expressed your gratitude.
“Course, love.” He said and kissed your lips quickly before making his way out of the room.
You sighed and rolled onto your back with a big smile; you were completely enamored and taken by his way of being towards you. Of course, deep down you were a bit nervous about the big tell-all with Caleb, but you knew you were going to be alright after getting all of the information from him. There was nothing left to fight for with Caleb. Your heart was already drifting in another direction and you didn’t intend to do a single fucking thing about it.
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Guide Ahead Means Something To Me
Writing about Guide Ahead is…. extremely difficult, for a few reasons. One is that it is a very dense story, and to fully unpack it would require an essay so unfocused that it would be functionally unreadable. But the biggest one is that Guide Ahead is a story that focuses really heavily on the subjective nature of interpretation. How can I speak authoritatively on the thematic meaning of the plot when even a basic description of its events demands a deeper poetic interpretation?
The answer is “I can’t.” So, let’s piss off my English teacher, and coat an entire essay in the phrase “in my opinion.” Because I have to get personal if I’m going to tell you why Guide Ahead is my favorite video game story ever told.
I was raised Mormon. My mother was religious, but my father was absolutely not. You can understand why I related to Cecilia basically immediately.
Ultimately, the thing that draws me to Guide Ahead is the very thing that makes it hard to write about. Guide Ahead is, in my reading, a story about the subjectivity of divine meaning.
The most obvious manifestation, and the most important, is Law. But, Law’s execution, in traditional Arknights fashion, is kinda unclear, so I’ll recap for those who have hobbies outside of this, unlike me.
Law is the supercomputer buried underneath Laterano, and is the sentient religion that binds all the Sankta together into a hivemind of sorts. The Sankta are actually just Sarkaz connected to Law, given halos, wings, and empathic communication between each other. But, the main thing they gain, is a biological impulse to obey the Lateran religion’s thirteen doctrines. Anyone who breaks these doctrines are marked as Fallen, are cut off from the empathic connection, and slowly revert back to Sarkaz. Law represents religion as a concept and a community. Saints and sinners are just one and the same. But despite that, the laws of religion are created just to perpetuate the existence of a special in-group. One enforced by empathic connection they cannot share with anyone outside of them. That is Patia’s point - the Sankta have created an “us” and a “them,” and even the devout Liberi are not seen as “us.” They’re just converts, not real Sankta.
But, Falling has… weird grey areas. Like how Andoain was able to shoot Lemuen, or draw his gun on the fucking Pope, and not Fall in the process. This is because the doctrines are not actually the guidelines they’re held to. The Doctrines are subjective interpretations of the objective Law that they are all beholden to. That Law being “It must survive.” Law only is interested in the perpetuation of Itself, and, as a result, the continued existence of the Sankta as a societal structure.
This is the first and strongest example of what I mean when I say Guide Ahead is about meaning. Law says that the failure of religion is ultimately that religions supplant any subjective meanings with an “objective” meaning. But this “objective” meaning is just another person’s interpretation of the in-group’s best interest. Laws biologically programmed into the Sankta’s souls are revealed to be nothing but interpretation of Law’s interpretation of events.
People Fall not because they have broken a concrete law, but because Law… because the in-group has decided they did. Or when they broke the rules, they did something that’s good for the church. There is no objective laws within the Lateran religion, no matter what the machine is named. The system just declares sin when it deems worthy, and absolution when sin is a benefit.
It is this very hypocrisy that drives Andoain.
——————————————————————————————————
I remember being pulled aside at church one day. Everyone above 14 was given a sermon about the recent legalization of gay marriage. He said it was wrong, the church would never accept it. I asked him if it was like the time the church refused to give black people the Priesthood. He said this was different. I asked him how. He did not answer. I left and someone followed me out. He asked if I was okay. I told him whatever he was saying in there was not the teachings of any god that I know, and wasn’t the teachings of any god that loves me. I kept going to church after that, but deep down, I think I didn’t believe in it anymore. I didn’t feel like part of the community, I lost that reciprocation with my people. I just… began to think.
Andoain, as an antagonist, is defined by a search for meaning. He was the bishop of an Iberian church, and Iberia is doing pretty bad lately. His request for aid from Laterano was denied, and the message was clear to him. “You are one of us, but they are not.” But that answer just created a new question. Why? Why would those who claim faith and utopia as their ideals reject those who are suffering?
He searched for an answer in exile, and he didn’t find one. Instead, he found another story. The Sarkaz man who died in the watchtower to warn a town who hated him of an invading force. And this story made his question develop. Why would someone who is hated by everyone give their life to protect those very people? And why would those people then cry over the grave of someone they hated?
He had seen the realities of the Sarkaz and Sankta laid bare, but he couldn’t figure out the meaning behind it. He tells Cecilia these stories, knowing full well he doesn’t know what to make of them. I think he tells them to hope he finds the point partway through.
——————————————————————————————————
As much as I hate the Mormon church for dear god everything they’ve ever done holy shit look at them? My feelings are predictably complicated. Years later, my family fell upon hard times. I don’t want to say more than that for my own sake. We were struggling to even live. But… the church helped us. None of us gone to church for years, but they offered a hand. They gave us access to the Bishop’s Storehouse, gave us food and supplies for free, because we were starving.
And yes, I know. I know they do this in an attempt at creating a false brotherhood in an effort to create a fascist sense of community. I have also read that part of Brothers Karamazov. I have also read Guide Ahead, come to think of it. But… Shit. Most of them tried to pretend we didn’t exist when we met them in the grocery store. And… they still helped us. In their eyes, I was Fallen.
But still, they saved us, and didn’t even ask for faith in return. I still can’t figure out why.
This is why I just… can’t see Andoain as a villain. I mean, yeah, he shot Lemuen, but even she doesn’t blame him for shooting his friends while holding the Stick That Makes You Shoot Your Friends. His entire goal is an attempt to sort through the cognitive dissonance between what the church tells him and what the church does. A dissonance that is, because of Law and the doctrines, innate to what the church is. An experience that should feel damn familiar to anyone who has spent time as an apostate. His plan is to simply confront the Pope about this hypocrisy, to get an answer, to find a meaning.
The answer he gets back is… It Must Survive. Law must survive. The in-group must survive. It doesn’t matter if we cry over the grave of the Sarkaz, because the Sarkaz would die for us. He searched for the answer to a question, the meaning of a statement. You are one of us. They are not. All this time, he searched for the meaning of those words, but in reality, those words were the meaning. That was all they ever had to say. He just needed to accept that.
…but if the in-group is all that mattered… why allow Mostima in Laterano? Why give her her position? She’s not needed for the survival of the in-group, the Law has deemed her an exile.
And… Why not Andoain?
Before he leaves, his gun is taken from him. A gun that, according to the church, has meaning. A meaning he takes as truth. He believes a part of him is left behind there. I don’t think he realizes it, but Mostima and Fiammetta are the question he left behind. They are Not Sankta, but yet they are accepted. And… I don’t know if there is a meaning to that. I still can’t figure out why.
——————————————————————————————————
For a long time, I missed those days spent in the community I had left. I would remember the things I left behind. The churchball basketball games we were destined to lose. The conversations held on the roof of the storage building behind the church. The scouting activities that were clearly an excuse to go bowling. The shitty halloween parties with the game where you ate donuts tied to a string hanging from a fishing pole. I missed it, for a time. I couldn’t help but look back.
Cecilia is searching for meaning to almost everything. When Andoain tells his stories to Cecilia, he tells her that he can’t find the meaning of them. That if there is meaning to be found, she’ll have to find it herself. So. She does.
Cecilia was faced with the same situation Andoain was obsessed with. But for her, it wasn’t hypothetical. She existed between Us and Them. She felt the pull between the community and the love and fun they represent, and the outsiders who were hated and rejected by the people around her. Society told her the meaning of her dual identity, the meaning behind each half, and then told her to choose. But… she’d experienced otherwise. She’d felt the kindness of the Sarkaz from the Pathfinders, and the hatred from the Church. She’d felt things that contradicted the meaning that she was told was true.
Her story isn’t just being forced to pick a side between the church or apostacy, it’s being forced to pick what meaning she ascribes to the world. Ultimately, that’s why her answer can only be her own. Your belief is… subjective.
And she answered… with a bell. A Sarkaz girl, bearing a halo, ringing a bell that has not been rung since the Sankta were still called Teekaz. A bell that once marked the beginning of the new era. A bell that carries the weight of a Sarkaz, hated by the place they called home. A bell that rings with the melody of a Sarkaz lullaby once sung by a Sankta. A bell that asserts her answer. She’s not Sarkaz, she’s not Sankta. She is Cecilia.
Everyone else finds their own subjective meaning within that action. Something as mundane as the ringing of the bell suddenly has more meaning than divine scripture.
No one else understood the nuance of what she said, but they understood parts of it. They understood what they wanted to. Those who know nothing of Lateran culture understand it as just… a beautiful welcome, celebrating the arrival of talks of peace. Most have their meaning determined by the church’s traditions. The pious see it as the beginning of a new era, whatever that signals to them. To the Church, it is that their talks will bring about a new era of peace. To the Pathfinders, it is a signal to begin their attack on Laterano to begin their new era.
There is so much meaning in that action, but in the end, it’s still just a fucking bell. There’s got to be hundreds, maybe thousands of them in Laterano. But this bell meant something more than the other bells. This bell had meaning, and that meaning made it divine.
This, to me, is what Guide Ahead has to say. That there is so much meaning to be found in something as mundane as a ringing bell. Within such a simple action, there is personal expression, liberation, the sound of change. And in all of this, there is the echoes of divinity, the echoes of faith, as if all of these things are, in themselves, divine.
——————————————————————————————————
When I left the church, I couldn’t help but look back, still tethered to a community who hated me. I think I wished I could stop looking back. I don't know if I realized I was.
In the end, everyone else looks back. They still have meaning to be found in Laterano. Andoain looks back, a part of his soul anchored there by the symbol he was told to believe in. Mostima looks back, knowing she’ll return just as she always does. Fiammetta looks back, because she refuses to let herself leave. Ezell looks back, unsure if he will be able to return home after what he has found.
But… Cecilia doesn’t. She has decided that she is not defined by the church, or the meaning they try to give her. She has decided to leave Laterano and see the world outside of it, to explore the world around her and find the meaning for herself.
And the last thing Cecilia does is... defined by ambiguous meaning. She sees Andoain walking in the sunset - and a word appears to her. The title of Martyr. A title she doesn’t understand the meaning or weight of, but that she feels is appropriate regardless. A title that, to other people, would mean something more. But to her, brings to mind the saints she heard of as a youth, a word her mother told her was important.
The story is ending, and they end it with an assertion. Cecilia is finding meaning, and others will find what they will within. Perhaps even she doesn't know all of it.
A while back, during a theater rehearsal, I suddenly remembered a conversation I had years before I left the church. I remembered speaking with my friends outside of the chapel after a sunday service. My friend said a sentence that has stuck with me ever since. “I don’t think science goes against God. I think God uses science and math. I think those things are holy, because they’re… what everything is made of.”
I remember looking around the rehearsal space and thinking that if science could be sacred, then… so is this moment, now. So is my time spent with the people I love. This is sacred. What I missed, what kept me looking back. It wasn’t the actual religion, but instead… just belonging to something. So… I stopped looking back. In that moment, however fleeting it was, I had found whatever it was I needed.
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Look. You probably had a different interpretation of Guide Ahead. This story is just… So goddamn dense. There is so much there that I didn’t even touch on. For the love of god, I just did an analysis of Guide Ahead and didn’t even really discuss Fiammetta?? What kind of hack writer am I? (I just… couldn’t talk about her without being more personal than I am willing to be in public.)
If you have an interpretation that is different than mine, that’s great. I encourage you to hold on to it, and hold it close. That meaning is yours, and yours alone, and that’s a precious thing.
Because to me, what I found… is that very idea.
There is meaning to be found in anything - and a meaning that is yours, and yours alone. All you have to do is find meaning. and the idea that there is meaning to the world, that everything has meaning not because there is a “true” meaning to it, but because we find one there, because we put one there… that makes everything feel… divine, to me.
So… wherever you find meaning, you can find the divine.
You can find divinity in a ringing bell. In a terrible cactus tart. A carnival game you know how to beat. The promises of peace around a table. A cup of coffee. A city you hate. A community you love. A flower growing near a grave. A weapon you carry. A people you surround yourself with.
Those are all… holy to me.
And to me… that meaning is enough.
I hope yours is for you.
#arknights#critical analysis#feel free to reblog#i know this is personal but don't worry I wrote it to be shared#thank you all.#finally i can rest
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My Girls (|||) | Max Verstappen
Words count: 3215
Driver!OC X Max Verstappen
Summery: Cecilia Hansson daughter of a Swedish billionaire, a race car driver, with a dream of making it big in Formula 1. However she has a few secrets that may hurt her as women are disliked in the sport.
Series Warnings: cursing, child abandment, absent father, drinking, car accidents, Jos Verstappen, misogyny, Christian horner (tell me if i missed anything)
Masterlist
Series Masterlist
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Hate for days
Four race weekends later and the hate for the female was ramping up for no reason. It was becoming unsettling for everyone, the drivers, the team and everyone involved. Yes her fanbase was also getting bigger but they were being overshadowed by the haters and they weren’t big enough yet. This week is the Austrian Grand Prix, maybe it was orchestrated but it was one hell of a week. The female has been doing great in all these races, being in the top 10 all the time, even snagging a Pole position in Canada at P3. all this seemed to make the people hate her more if that was even possible, how can this woman do better than Sebastian Vettle they said, he’s a four time world champion, the name calls, the speculations, everything made them tick. Every week Cecilia is racing; she's doing things no female has done before in Formula 1, even if she left today she’d be remembered in the sport, they had the audacity to say it’s because she’d a nepo baby, when half the grid were nepo babies themselves, children of past drivers.
The one day the female dreaded in her race week is the Media day, she didn't mind the videos she made for Mclaren with Lando, the two becoming closer as the year went on. Decked in Mclaren’s kit once again, she made her way to the entrance. And some asshole just had the audacity to throw something at her, she was standing signing a cap one of her fans was holding when she felt it hit her. She gasped in shock and pain and was in an instant led inside by the security walking with her, she couldn’t even turn around and look before she was whisked inside. She did hear shouting and some type of ruckus behind her, her German wasn’t great but she heard a lot of cursing. She doesn’t even know what was thrown at her, but she felt liquid running down the side of her face, pulling back her hand she saw it red, it wasn’t blood it was some sort of paint or something. The security hadn’t let her stop until she was in Mclaren’s motorhome, Sedil was talking to Toto Wolff of all people when his driver came in with her blonde hair and part of her face red for a split second it did look like blood, bu it was much brighter, around her people were panicking.
“I’m fine, I’m fine.” The female was repeating over and over again to no avail, no one was listening to her it seemed.
“What happened?” Sedil asked his(favourite) driver.
“An asshole threw what I’m guessing is a balloon filled with paint or something at me, but I’m fine.” Pressing the last part as she said looking at her PR manager.
“That’s not okay.” Toto was the one to say, he’s never seen or heard of a driver getting something thrown at them like this before, they weren't at a play for goodness sake, he hoped Mclaren would handle this and take care of their drivers more.
“No it’s not, but there's nothing I can do about it now.” The female said, shrugging, all in the love of the sport. “I’m just going to shower and get ready for the day, again.”
Walking off with her head held high, she wasn’t going to slip or crumble even if all she wanted was to do that, she hadn’t left her daughter and family for her to do that. They’ll hold nothing on her, no way. Nothing is getting in her way.
“That’s a special one you got there.” Toto said watching as the female left with people still fretting over her.
“Yes we do, I’m just afraid it’ll only get worse.” Sedil pushed up his glasses while watching the strong woman on his team.
“Just make her come in the back door.”
“That’s not what I'm talking about.”
Later in the day after Cecilia showered(and tried not to break down in the shower), changed into fresh clothes, redid her makeup with the help of the female workers in the team’s makeup, she looked fresh as new. The news already spread and pictures were already floating online, Cecilia talked to her dad and reassured him she's okay and told him to keep it from her daughter.
Lando was waiting for her in front of her door. “I’m fine.” She said before he could open his mouth. As they walked out together for the small little interviews they had to do together before they were split up, she was thankful no one asked about this morning, whether it was because Lando signalled to their friends not to or because they saw the look on her face she had no idea but she’s thankful nonetheless.
The group interviews are what she hated the most, she was mostly ignored still but was asked a few questions every now and then. Today she was being interviewed with Lewis, Seb, Pierre and Kimi.
She smiled when she saw the lot, Pierre giving her a longer hug than normal, the female’s love language being physical touch didn’t hate it, Seb also pulled her for a hug. When they walked onto the platform, Cecilia sat in the middle with Seb and Lewis on one side and Pierre and Kimi on the other. For the first 10 minutes or so nothing unusual happened, she was asked a yes or no question and that was it.
“For the older group, since you’ve had the chance to race with Cecilia, what do you think about having a female in the sport?” the man asking, made the Mclaren driver roll her eyes a little, the way he said female it sounded like they were the lowest of the lowest, god’s most despised creation, acting as if his mother was anything but a female.
“I think she’s a phenomenal driver, regardless of her gender she’s had an amazing start to her rookie season.” Lewis said, praising the girl, he didn’t like what happened today and what continues to happen in the sport, everytime he thinks the world is going in the right direction something like this happens.
“Going over what Lewis said, I’ve watched her race for years, before she became an F1 driver, and I’ve even told Lewis about her before, racing with her is something I had hoped to do for a while now.” Sebastian said and Lewis nodded with his words, they both looked neutral on the outside fuming on the inside.
“So her being a female doesn’t bother you?” Tilting her head a little at the question, she isn’t sure she heard him correctly, people seem to be getting bolder today.
“Why?” Kimi was the one to answer, something he never does, he never answers for someone else. The iceman has a daughter of his own, he dreads the day she comes into a sport or a workplace that is a male dominated and having to go through this shit, he applauds Cecilia’s courage, and he hopes for once the sport can change and adapt.
“S-sorry?” The man asking the question stuttered, he didn’t quite understand what kimi was asking.
“Why does it matter that she’s a female?” Both Seb and Lewis watched on as Kimi talked, they knew he 100% had this handled, getting Kimi to talk was a hard thing but when he did he had facts and truth only.
“Just the physicality of the sport and the pressure of it…”
“Have you seen any signs of her under performing?” Kimi asked, his eyes narrowing ever so slightly, Cecilia felt like she was in a tennis match watching as Kimi talked and the other man struggled to respond. She knew her grid mates, the drivers all had her back, but watching it in action is something else. When the man struggled to answer Kimi continued. “She hasn’t, so we can have this conversation when her gender comes into play.”
“Nicely said Kimi.” Seb grinned, happy with the outcome, Cecilia had to bite the tip of her tongue to stop herself from laughing at the scared look the man had on his face.
The questions moved on, people were more aware of their questions now, she and Kimi got little questions for the rest of the conference both unbothered by it. Pierre did bring up how she beat him a lot while they were young, reminiscing about their Karting days.
The next two days she was booed wherever she went, circuit walk, all of free practices, qualifying people were just booing her whenever they saw her, it kept amping up, first it was five people then ten then twenty then forty and so on and so forth.
By race day where she was starting P4 a whole section was booing her, Cecilia looked ahead not giving them any attention. Her team had her back and that’s all she wanted or needed.
She had a tough time for the race, she had to overtake Lewis, Valtteri and Seb for P1, and she planned to do it, she’ll prove everyone wrong and end this debate once and for all. Lap 15 she overtook Valtteri in the DRS zone 1, she was scared he’ll overtake her in Zone 2 but Max was also making a move so that made him the main focus not her, she was able to slip away and close in on the Ferrari ahead of her.
RE(race engineer) You’re now P3, keep the pace until we need to box for now. We suspect Ferrari to box soon as well
Trusting her team’s judgement, she waited until lap 30 where she’s been gaining on Seb before she started losing grip in the tires and had to box, a little earlier than they hoped but she had to box now or she’ll be overtaken. Seb boxed a few laps after her, and that gave her the edge and took his position and as much as she loved the man she wasn’t about to let him take P2 again.
Cecilia Someone tell Seb, I love him but I love view from here. RE *chuckle* will do
At the end of sector 2 beginning of 3 she tried to overtake Lewis at turn 8 but he left her no room; she had to stay back or hit the wall. She watched Lewis closely, she knows this man, she grew up watching him race, she analysed his techniques, surely they’ll help her overtake him.
Lap 67 the race was slowly coming to an end, under 5 laps left the distance between her and Lewis grew at one point, before she scored the fastest lap and closed the distance in lap 68. Once again at the downhill part of the track she tried to overtake lewis in turn 5, 6, 7, and 8, only managing to overtake him in turn 9, she braked late and went on the inside, getting in the DRS zone she gave it her all and tried to just giver herself as much distance as she could.
RE That’s amazing, just focus on maintaining speed, Hamilton’s tires aren’t helping him. Cecilia He won’t box will he? RE No you’re in lap 69 Cecilia Oh… that’s good i guess
The last three laps had Cecilia feeling like she wasn’t in control of her body, she was focused on winning, she didn’t count the laps, didn't do anything, just asked about the time between her and Lewis and raced. Passing the chequered flag made her want to cry and laugh at the same time.
RE That’s P1 Cecilia P1! Well done! Cecilia OH MY GOD! I DID IT! Thank you, thank you so much. Oh my god, we did it everyone, amazing job. RE You just made history Cecilia
Finishing her cool down lap she drove to the number one stand and got out of the car and ran to Mclaren, the team held the crying girl, of course she had her helmet on, no one was able to see her face.
She went to get weighted, Lewis came up to her as she took off her helmet. The male opened his arms for a hug and she just let him. He patted her back, despite coming in 2nd to her he was beyond happy for her, she deserved it. Seb took Lewis’ place hugging Cecilia so tight before he slightly lifted her off the ground.
“Congratulations, Cece, you deserve it.” Was all Seb managed to say before he was whisked away for his interview. When it was her turn she had thankfully calmed down a little.
“Cecilia, amazing race, amazing performance, congratulations on your first win in Formula one.'' The female presenter had a huge smile on her face.
“Thank you so much.” Cecilia had a matching grin.
“Tell me, how do you feel right now?”
“It feels like a dream, I've dreamt and worked for this moment since my first go kart ride, so it feels a little unreal.” The female said and took out her braid from her suit, feeling it bother her slightly.
“One last question before you go, what do you want to say to everyone watching you right now?” Cecilia chuckled in true Cecilia fashion as she looked at the camera, her ice blue eyes dead as they looked emotionlessly at the camera lens.
“I want to thank those who booed me, you hate me, means you think about me, and because I was in your thoughts I was able to win.” With a tilt to her lips she smiled at the interviewer, thanked her and left.
Walking into the cool down room, she took the number one hat and looked at it, her first one. Sitting between the two males they watched the screen replaying some parts of the race, they were talking about what happened during the race.
The screen showed the moment Cecilia overtook Lewis, Sebastian was seeing the chase for the first time, in a few seconds she was able to get pole position and pass the current world champion.
“That was great Cecilia, very daring.” Sebastian complemented her, a moment she will forever hold, she felt beyond proud of herself.
Standing in the middle on the top part of the podium was such a surreal moment, definitely one she won’t ever forget. When the Monaco national anthem played Cecilia felt so proud she hoped her girl was watching her mummy win. Holding her trophy up she kissed it and held it high for photos, she did this, she won this award with her blood sweat and tears(and champagne). This moment is hers so fuck all the haters because she deserved this.
Cecilia opted out from her traditional analysis of the race and she went back to the hotel to shower and get ready for the party, all her friends and crew wanted to celebrate her first win. She doesn’t drink much anymore but for once she’d go have a few drinks and dance and let loose. She facetimed her family, her girl was full of shouts relaying what she saw in a comical way, seeing her through the screen she wanted to go home and hug and kiss her little girl.
For once Cecilia was dressed and felt like herself, she knew there will be photos posted after this night, but she dressed in a dress, did her make-up how she liked and curled her hair. Making it to the club with Lando, they had room next to each other. Walking in they found their friends already there, Pierre and Alex already a couple drinks in.
“Our winner!” Charles called seeing his female best friend, he threw his arms out and he pulled her in for a hug, they swayed for a moment. “Félicitations, Cece.” (congratulations)
“Thank you.” Pulling back she was pulled into multiple hugs before Pierre handed her a shot that she threw back, making them cheer. In no time everyone was hitting the dance floor, having the time of their lives. Just a group of twenty somethings having fun.
Charles and Cecilia were dancing when Max made it, he saw the two dancing and laughing. See, times like this it looked like they were dating, but he knows that Charles is in a relationship, and rumours have it Cecilia is single, but you never know.
“Maxy!” He didn’t need to look to know who was calling him, the female being the only one who dared keep calling him that to his face all the time, turning to look at her, she looked a little drunk, George handed her another drink as he passed and he watched her take big sips.
“You’re drunk.” He was amused, he’s sure she’ll never remember this in the morning.
“And you’re not drunk enough.” She said and tried to give him her drink to get him drunk, Max took it from her hand and took the chance to look at her from up close. She was sweaty but her make-up was intact, to him it looked different, he only ever saw her wearing make-up on media days, now he’s never seen her wear a dress in real life, since the beginning of the season she’d only ever been spotted wearing her team’s kit. Max placed her drink on the table, seeing how drunk everyone is, he made the split decision to try and cut her off, she was stumbling as she walked, and they all had flights out tomorrow afternoon.
“I don’t get drunk easily.” Max told her, her eyes were unfocused, and she was blinking slowly, definitely tired.
“Bo-ho, a few years ago I would’ve been able to drink and not get drunk, not anymore.” She pouted, the last time she got drunk, or drank anything more than some wine with dinner was the day before she found out she’s pregnant. “Well, I’m gonna go dance.”
Before he could do anything she found Lando and pulled him to dance with her, he seemed more sober so he left them to it, mingling with his friends, he saw some RedBull crew who he talked with and sipped his glass of beer, did he keep Cecilia in his line of sight? Yes he did. Did he stop Pierre and Alex from giving her any more drinks? Yes he did. Did he tell Lando to take her back to the hotel? Yes he did. Also did he help him take her to the car waiting for them outside? Yes he did. Will she remember it? No she probably won’t.
The next day Cecilia woke up to the bright sun streaming through her window, she was on her side and a trash can next to her head. She was still dressed in her dress from last night. She groaned and pulled the cover over her head, she didn't want to wake up. Trying to fall back asleep wasn’t a success when her phone rang and she was informed that she had to leave in under an hour. Sitting up, her blonde hair was all over the place, she remembered almost nothing from the night before, she didn't want to get drunk, but here she is the next day remembering nothing.
“Fuck.”
CeciliaHansson15
Tagged, Mclaren
liked by georgerussell63, charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and 1,263,211 others
ceciliahansson15 the journey has been long, but well worth it. This is only the first step. to all the girls out there know you can do it too.
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username1 you go queen
username2 we need more women in the sport
charles_leclerc félicitations cecilia, j'ai toujours cru en toi (Congratulations Cecilia, alwaywas believed in you)
liked by ceciliahansson15
Ceciliahansson15 merci de toujours me soutenir (thank you for always having my back)
Pierregasly mon ami vient de gagner!!! (my friend just won)
liked by ceciliahansson15
username5 just luck, don't let it get to you're head
username6 what the f do you mean luck, did u actully watch the race
username6 and it's your not you're learn how to spell
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#f1 x driver!reader#f1 x reader#max verstappen#max verstappen one shot#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1dr#max verstappen imagine#my girls#max verstappen x reader#f1 scenario#f1 x oc
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NPC Life is the best
(Genshin impact x gn reader - sagau)
(second person pov)
Prologue —> part.1
—————————————————
If you were to be honest to yourself instead of being delusional,
you’d say your life is quite average.
throughout your years of living, it has all almost become a blur. You were born, you were raised with loving parents, you got average grades, you graduated, and you got a good job.
Your pay was quite good, it kept you alive and enough to even spend more than normal on yourself. You’ve even had a few partners to your own surprise. Even though your single now but on good term with your exes, you can’t help but find that your life has always been awfully un eventful.
well at least you have a few games to keep you company! Genshin Impact has been one that you’ve been on the rage about for ages. While your friends and family don’t seem to care for the game, you don’t mind. It’s fun exploring the areas, looking at the immaculate graphics, fighting new mobs and bosses, and especially wishing for your favorite characters!
you’ve recently even gotten into a few fanfics of the fantasy game yourself. Most fanfics that you read tend to fall in the Sagau category. It’s such an interesting topic no? Being tossed into a world filled with characters you adore only to be chased down and hunted. Well that is if you land in the imposter au. But, nonetheless, you cherish the game that has spruced up your life just a tiny bit~
Well
that was until you were tossed into the game yourself
‘oh god’
‘am I gonna die’
‘holy shit’
‘what the hell is going on right now’
a flash of white blinds your eyes as they slowly adjust to the bright surroundings after being torn from your peaceful sleep.
“Shit”
you couldn’t help but mumble as you finally grow accustomed to your surroundings. As you glance around you find yourself looking at the vast view of mondstat from Starsnatch Cliff. The wind was crisp and the Cecilia flowers let out a gentle sweet smell that filled your nostrils as you began to stand up.
‘I can’t tell of this a blessing or a curse..’
your thoughts scrambled in your head as you let the breeze brush through your hair. The cloths that you wore when you were still cozily asleep on your bed were now gone and replaced with a simple white button up with the top three buttons being popped off, a light cape tied to the loops on the side of your button up that has large cuts on the side for your arms and falls down to your thighs, a pair of loose and some what airy trousers, and comfortable shoes. As you look at your cloths you find yourself holding a small beat up book with your name engraved into it.
How strange..
you open the book to find a small note in it.
Your journey has started
Please note that the characters you encounter will not recognize you as your ( THE CREATOR) appearance is considered anonymous. While they may not recognize you, those gifted with visions WILL notice your “strange” comforting aura.
your goal is to simply live
As *their* beloved CREATOR or as a simple kind citizen of teyvat. This is your choice
so chose wisely
might as well explore and see the world
Signed your beloved C.
As you finish reading the first two pages of your special little book, you look up into the clear sky
might as well start trekking to the city of freedom
——————————————————————
Carp bread- brain poop
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U.N. Experts Urge the U.S. to Stop Actions Adverse to Cuba
U.N. experts called on the U.S. to remove Cuba from its list of state sponsors of terrorism and to end the U.S. embargo of the island. They also warned of the U.S. expansion of restrictions against Cuba that will add additional constraints on the island and impose adverse effects on its capacity to meet the needs of the Cuban people.[1] “These additional trade restrictions expanded the list of…
#(Special Rapporteur on the negative impact of unilateral coercive measures)#Alena Douhan#Cecilia M. Bailliet (Independent Expert on human rights and international solidarity)#Cuba#Cuba as "State Sponsor of Terrorism"#George Katrougalos (independent Expert on the promotion of a democratic and equitable international order)#U.S. embargo (blockade) of Cuba#United Nations
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