#Sorry almost forgot but I don't remember who
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3vergr3en · 8 hours ago
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Kissin’ and hope they caught us!
PAIRING (📖) . loser!collegeau!jake x fem!college!reader
A/N (🖊️) . I'm crazy over loser Jake (he's so cute 😕) my obsession with the headcanon abt Jake being a loser trapped in a hot man's body is concerning in the name of feminism. he has me gripping my hair like im going insane or smth
ADDITIONAL INFO (💻) . W/C is 2.2k! porn with no plot. Reader is smitten with Jake!! Jake is a little oblivious but it's okay, his geek charm makes up for it (and for the fact that he's PACKING). These two are FREAKS and PERVS. No p in v, oral (male received), Jake cant help himself from cumming inside, public sex!! everything about this fic is just so filthy and nasty 🫣
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You recalled all the times when you dreaded going to college. It would be a new chapter of your life and you didn't know if it would turn out well.
But that would change as soon as you stepped into your campus's library and laid eyes on such a greek god of a man who sat at a table surrounded by books. Looking past the round frame of his glasses, you can see his big doe eyes that held a blend of curiosity and intellect. But that innocent look to him would only fuel your desire as you take in his features. His plump, soft pink lips curling up into a warm smile complimented his chiseled jawline. You don't know how a man could look so handsome yet so cute but you knew right then that college would be the best time of your life.
Midterms were nearing and what does a studious girl like you do during these times?
Eye-fuck your best friend who's taking the time out of his day to help you study.
"Y/n?" His soft-like-butter voice brought you out of your daze. "Do you understand this?" Jake asks, bringing your attention to the section in your notebook where his.. long, slender fingers are pointing.
You tug your bottom lip between your teeth, biting back the whimper that threatened to slip out when you watch him pick up your pen and skillfully swing it around his middle finger till it sits perfectly on his ring finger. You can only imagine how his fingers could feel inside of you. Curling just enough to reach that spot that makes you see stars. Yeah... he's getting it tonight.
“I uhm— I don’t understand, sorry.” You reply with a lack of sincerity. You knew damn well what you were doing. You like to say that hearing it from Jaeyun would make studying fun.
Jake grins, letting out a soft chuckle. Who’s he to turn you down when you’re seeking his help. Because in reality, he’s had an eye on you for a while. He will never forget the day when he first met you.
It was a Tuesday, and Heeseung came literally begging (almost on his knees too) him to do his paper that he forgot was due at 11:59 PM that same day. And what does sweet, caring Jake do? You guessed it, he manages to cram a 6-page essay into his already busy schedule. He remembers sitting at a table in the library, books about whatever Heeseung was researching were scattered around him. He was on the brink of calling it quits and letting his friend fail (which was most likely not gonna happen) and quite literally started praying for a sign of some sort to encourage him to continue on.
And as if he had his own personal angel watching over him to hear his prayers, the sound of your boots clicking against the smooth, wooden floorboards drew his attention from the book sprawled out in front of him. There you were, strutting through the double doors with a smile. The confidence that oozed out of you had reached him even when he was across the room. He watched you talk to the lady at the front desk, in awe when you tucked a strand of loose hair behind your ear as you focused on something. You were like a shot of espresso and he drank in the sight of you. You were everything he had ever dreamt of in a girl. From the hair to the way you dressed, hell, even your smile. He was too lost in his thoughts to realize you were walking up to him. It wasn't till you spoke that snapped him back into reality, "Hey, is this seat taken?" You ask, pointing at the empty seat next to him.
He just stares.
Holy shit. You were talking to him. Holy shit. Holy fuck. shitshitshit. C'mon, Jake. Say something.
His voice slightly cracks when he mutters a quick, "No."
You bite your bottom lip, smiling at his reaction. "Great. I'm Y/n, you are..?" You ask, sitting down in the chair beside him.
His eyes dart around the empty seats surrounding the two of you. Why would you want to sit directly next to him? Do you think he's cute? Well, you're definitely cute. You're really hot. Drop-dead gorgeous even. Wait. Why are you staring at him like that? Did he- OH-
"Jaeyun! Sim Jaeyun!" He almost barks out, cringing into his seat when he gets shh'ed at by a random student.
You giggle quietly, slouching down to match his level. "Nice to meet you, Jaeyun. I hope we can be friends."
Friends... Yeah.. I can do friends! (he def cannot do friends and neither can you)
"Hey Jake," You calling his name startles him. "Hm?" He really needs to stop dozing off in front of you.
"There's this book that I couldn't reach earlier. Could you help me with that?" You chuckle, giving a moment for the boy to process. And as if on cue, his head perks up to look at you. There he goes.
You guide him towards the very far back of the library, specifically a corner that had students unlikely to come by. It was shielded off by another shelf of books, allowing for you two to go unnoticed.
"Where was it again?" Jaeyun asks, his height easily granting him access to the tallest shelf.
"Right.." You point at some random book, "There."
Jake, too immersed in his determination to find the said book, fails to notice you sinking down onto your knees right next to him. "Y/n? What's the title of the book? I can't really..." He finally goes to look at you. But he's confused when he's met with an empty space that was once occupied by you. He looks around until his gaze travels downwards where he sees you looking up at him with a smile.
"Y-Y/n! Wh-What are you doing?" Oh god. He can feel himself twitching inside his sweats. This is a very dangerous sight to see you in.
"I wanted to repay you for helping me, Jaeyun." You calmly explain, batting your eyelashes at him.
He's dreaming. He has to be.
"You're such a sweet guy y'know..." Your hands snake up his legs, "And I was thinking 'How could I ever repay him' but then," You lean in to plant a kiss on his prominent bulge, "This idea popped in my head not too long ago."
Jake could only lean against the shelves of books to steady himself. His hand glued to his mouth to muffle any sounds that slipped out while you pulled down the waistband of his pants.
This is exactly like his wet dream but so much fucking better.
"Y/n— oh fuck.." He moans into his hand when he feels you pulling his cock out from its confines. The cold air hitting his warm dick makes him hiss.
"Holy fuck, Jake. You're huge." You gawk, staring at his cock that you were lazily stroking. It was average in length, but fuck, the girth makes up for it.
"Fuck. Please, Y/n." The way he moaned your name sent waves of heat straight to your core. You swore you could feel your slick seeping through your panties.
Your hand feels so much better than his by a long shot. It's so soft, so warm. If it feels this good in your hand, he wonders how it would feel to be buried inside of you.
As pre-cum oozes out from his tip, you couldn't help but circle your thumb around the head of his cock. This must've been a sensitive spot for him by the way he abruptly thrusts his hips forward. "F-Fuck. I need to feel more, please." He begs almost pathetically, eyes hooded in need. Need to feel your mouth around his dick.
"You have to stay quiet, Jaeyun. Don't want people to find out what we're doing back here, do we?" You question, giving his cock a tug that makes him whimper.
You're so hot when you're manhandling him like this. So so hot. "No." He answers shakily, his chest heaving up and down.
You smile at him. So obedient. So cute.
You flattened out your tongue, slapping his head on the pink muscle. He tilts his head back, jaw slacked and mouth open, but no sounds come out. Only heavy breaths and quiet whimpers. Your warm breath fanning over his cock feels so good. But nothing will prepare him when he then feels you licking up a long stripe from the base of his dick to the very tip. If it weren't for the shelves supporting him, he'd be on the floor right now.
You moan before lapping your tongue at his tip, collecting his pre-cum. "You taste so good, Jakey."
You felt daring all of a sudden. Having the man of your desires stand here, letting you suck his dick was hotter than any fantasy you had. You relaxed your throat, giving yourself a moment to prepare for what you're about to do.
Jake could sense something coming from you. The way you looked up at him, he can see in your eyes what you're thinking about. He didn't really know exactly what to expect, but he brought one hand to cover his mouth just in case.
A guttural moan rips out from Jake when you suddenly try to take him whole into your mouth. His eyes widen as he realizes that he was louder than he anticipated it to be. He just prays that no one comes snooping around. Especially not when he has his dick down your throat because not only would that be petrifying, but he can not let you stop. Now now. Not when he had spent countless nights fucking his hand, hoping that it'd be your mouth one day. Now that it's happening, he can't let a second go to waste.
You gagged around his length, feeling the head of his dick hit the deepest parts of your throat. And what's crazy is how he isn't even fully in your mouth. There was still a couple inches left. That fact alone was you clenching around nothing. You could only imagine how he'd feel inside of you. He'd make you feel so full, so stuffed. You moan at the thought, sending vibrations into his dick that makes the boy rolls his eyes to the back of his head.
Jake, on the other hand, was reeling in the pleasure of having your warm, wet mouth around his cock. He moans into his palm, teeth sinking into the flesh to the point where he almost draws blood. It's surreal how your mouth makes him go fucking crazy. His head feels so light yet so heavy.
Your hands gripped the back of his thigh to steady yourself while pushing more of his dick down your throat for merely a couple of seconds before pulling away. You're gasping for air, perhaps you overestimated how much you could take him.
Jake nearly cums at the sight. Your chin is glistening while a string of saliva connects your lips to his raging red tip. He isn't sure what came over him at the moment, but he needed to feel your mouth around him again. He finds himself sliding a hand into your hair, grabbing a handful of it before shoving his dick past your swollen, pink lips and down your throat. "Fucking take it. Holy shit." He groans, mouth open with a mantra of your name spilling out.
You're blinking away the tears that pooled in your eyes, trying to focus on breathing through your nose while your best friend manhandles your mouth. This was a total 180 of how he usually is, and you loved it.
Everything about this was so lewd. The sounds of you gagging around his dick mixed with Jake moaning was music to your ears. You look up at him through your lashes, taking in how cute he looked in his specs while moaning your name.
"This mouth feels.. fuck. Feels so fucking good." Jake mutters, hips snapping against your face as he feels his high nearing. "G-Gonna cum down your throat. Sh-Shit, you're gonna take all of my fucking cum." He's just rambling now. Mind is too fucked to even think about anything else but cumming down your pretty little throat.
With one final thrust, his pelvis is flush against your face as he feels himself emptying his load down your throat. "Holy fuuuck.. Oh my god, Y/n."
You could only sit there and swallow everything he gave you. This is your way of repaying him.
He doesn't pull out till he feels himself going soft in your mouth. And he's quick to start apologizing once he does, "I-I'm so sorry, Y/n. I didn't even ask where you wanted me to cu–"
You're swatting your hands around, shaking your head as you swallow hard. "It's okay. I wanted it." Your voice is hoarse due to his assault on your throat. But you loved the result of it.
He helps you stand up before combing out the knot in your hair that he caused. "Well, the library is about to close for the night. We should get—"
"Do you want to come over to my place, Jakey?" You ask, holding his hands in yours.
He nearly chokes on his own saliva. "Uh,, y-yeah! We can!" He agrees, nodding almost frantically.
"I need help with biology. Specifically anatomy." You smile, trailing your finger down his chest.
"Yeah... I-I can help you." He whispers out.
"Yeah?" You giggle, pecking the corner of his mouth.
He'll help you with whatever it is if it means you'll repay him by giving him head.
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blujayonthewing · 1 year ago
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more dnd and adjacent media should be run and written by people who think dwarves and elves are boring but care very sincerely about halflings and gnomes
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kittyfrisk9 · 2 months ago
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IdeaDpxDc: A nice moment with a sleep demon.
Note: Sorry, I don't know English, so please use a translator. I apologize if you don't get the idea.
Dead On Main.
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Danny accidentally absorbed some of Nocturn's powers (like in the Vortex episode), and now, with these new temporary abilities, why not take advantage of them? Like a kid with a new toy, Danny (or should I say Phantom: with a new design) has fun every night going from dream to dream.
The dream world is so strange! Without the constant threat of a dream entity trying to take over the world and all that. Now he has fun exploring the most unusual parts of his classmates' subconscious, or anyone's in general.
Even though he knows he shouldn't be doing this (after all, he's a responsible adult now), spying on other people's dreams isn't exactly something a mature person would do.
On the other hand, Danny is the responsible adult; Phantom is the one who uses his new powers recklessly. Plus, no one in Gotham knows who Phantom is, and at the end of the day, he's not hurting anyone. Point in his favor!
It was all fun and games… until he felt it: the unpleasant taste of a nightmare, distressing and desperate. Phantom knows he has to intervene, because, unlike Nocturn, he does not delight in the suffering of others.
So he goes. And what he sees shocks him.
Resonant laughter of a psychopath, the constant pain of flesh being beaten, and the devastating reminder that no one came to help. Phantom doesn't just see it, he feels it. Gross. What is this? Why would anyone be hurting a child? Then he understands: this is not just a nightmare, it's a memory, and someone is suffering from reliving it.
He absolutely will not allow this nightmare to continue.
...
Jason hasn't been having good days lately, mostly because instead of going to therapy, he's chosen to sweep his trauma under the rug and aggressively throw himself into crime-fighting. He's not good at dealing with his emotions, especially when he's been tormented by the same damn nightmare over and over again.
He knows the script by heart, he knows how it will end, but he still feels the same fear as the first time.
His head hurts.
"No, not again," he thinks in terror. Once again, he's tied up, unable to move or call for help. It's colder than he remembers. The walls have a grotesque tint, with laughter written in every corner. But the worst thing is the silence… until the sound of clashing metal begins to resonate.
Everything is a thousand times worse. He's sure the original scenario wasn't like this, but his terrified mind refuses to accept it.
The metallic sound resonates louder, each crash rumbling in Jason's chest. His breathing quickens, and then he hears it: that laugh.
A deep, distorted echo of laughter that seems to come from every direction. The laughter snakes around the grotesque walls, filled with the same letters that repeat his agony. “Ha… ha… ha…” fills the air, louder with each invisible step that approaches.
Then, he appears.
It’s not the Joker he remembers from that fateful night. This one is worse. Bigger, more deformed, with a smile that seems to tear at his own face. The colors of his suit are darker, more twisted. It’s as if his mind has amplified him, made him more monstrous.
“My, my, how little Robin has grown? But… something remains the same, doesn’t it? No matter how many times you live it, it always ends the same way. And to think that you were my greatest work of art!”
His voice is mocking, but behind the mockery is pure cruelty, a wicked amusement that lights up in those crazy eyes.
The Joker leans towards Jason, his face invading the small distance between them. The sound of metal continues to echo, and Jason knows what's coming next.
"Oh, I almost forgot…" he says, pulling out of nowhere an iron crowbar that gleams in the dim light of the nightmare. "It wouldn't be a good memory without this, would it?"
That's when the pain begins. Jason doesn't want to scream, and he won't. Even though that abominable creature is just a representation of his killer, he won't give him the luxury of listening to him suffer. The blows continue, and Jason bites his tongue. It's just a nightmare, it's not real�� it's not real.
It's not real.
It's not real.
It's not-
"Hey… Are you okay?" he hears him ask. His shocked gaze turns to where the clown should be and discovers that he's gone. In his place, there's a handsome young man: short, slightly messy black hair, expressive purple eyes, and a body almost completely shrouded in dark shadows.
The mysterious man had a cosmic air about him, surrounded by a mix of special effects of stars and galaxies. Something magical.
And new.
Jason honestly doesn't know what he's seeing, or why he's seeing it. "What?" he says, unable to find another word to describe his situation.
The entity laughs at his stunned state, a reassuring echo very different from the joker's laughter. Then he snaps his fingers, and suddenly he's no longer in that ugly room. He's now in a field of flowers, beautiful and vibrant, looking out at a starry sky.
Okay, this is the part where he asks his brain how he went from being in a nightmare to being with a handsome guy under the stars, hands free and untethered.
"Relax, you're not crazy," the being says as he lies back in the grass. “You were in pain, and I didn’t like it, so I got you out of there. Don’t worry, that abomination won’t bother you again.”
Jason blinks twice, bewildered, not understanding anything. “You… saved me?”
“You could say yes.”
“Why?” He shakes his head. “No, wait, that’s not the question. Who…?” Looking back at the being, he decides to change his question: “What are you?”
He seems to have taken the being by surprise.
It clasps its hands together as it looks up at the sky, trying to act normal. Jason narrows his eyes. “You can call me Void.”
“Did you just make up that name?”
The being looks away, seemingly embarrassed at being found out. “Yeah…” And suddenly exclaims, “Ah, ancients! I'm not supposed to be doing this, much less with one of the bats."
That last sentence had given away more than it should have.
"Hey, how about we admire the night view and then pretend this never happened?" Void suggested with a hopeful smile, turning to Jason.
Maybe it was the soft scent of the flowers, the calm atmosphere, or just the tiredness after so many nights of endless nightmares, but Jason, without thinking too much about it, walked over, lay down next to Void on the grass, and said, "No."
He needed a break.
...
And that's how Jason befriended a dream demon. And how Danny pretended to be a dream demon until Nocturn's powers wore off. He couldn't let the bats find out his identity.
After that, they spent more time together, fell in love, there was drama and there was closure. In the middle of all that, Danny started having tea with Alfred in the dream world, and at other times, he had fun bothering the other bats in their dreams.
But that's another story.
---
Note: Sorry, I don't know English, so please use a translator. I apologize if you don't get the idea.
Part 2
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ikeuverse · 4 months ago
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MY WORLD — p.sunghoon
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PAIRING: sunghoon x fem!reader  GENRES: angst, smut, fluff WC: 14.3k+
WARNINGS: alcohol consumption, swearing, unprotected sex (do it safely), cumming inside, arguing, Sunghoon is completely surrendered to yn. sorry, i can't see him if not cute in this story, this man needs to be taken care of. lmk if i forgot anything else.
SYNOPSIS: you're back and you owe Sunghoon an explanation for your departure, but it looks like it's going to be a bit tricky to get him to listen to you.
NOTES: after so many requests i've come up with the second part, and possibly the final one because i can't think of a continuation after that. it took me a long time because i had a huge blockage and i don't know if i'm satisfied with what came out of here, but i just wanted to give these two a cosy feel. and for you who read my work. i hope you like it!
TAGLIST: this isn't necessarily a taglist, but i decided to tag the people who asked for part two of the story, so… @seunghancore @sunghoonizz @indigoez @heestarry @yunjinhuhjennifer @pollito-sims4 @srhnyx @enhalusional @moon368 @madustos @capri-cuntz @stellanam @flaminghotyourmom @jayshadoww @sovlidago @randommmmmmvheusbs @rjssierjrie @rikiversesworld @lovingvoidgoatee
part 1 | masterlist
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Avoiding work on Friday nights was one of the first things Sunghoon did after you left. He didn't want to deal with the fact that that particular day was when he found you sitting at one of the tables in his bar with Stella, waiting for his and Jay's shift to finish so you could all drink together.
Now nothing else made sense, and those nights were filled with his bed, a cosy blanket and your mind wandering back to the last night you and he spent together. Sunghoon could feel the touch of your fingers on his skin, the way his name was whispered by you. It felt like an endless melody. Sleeping next to him had a different meaning after so long friendship.
But then the bitter taste of disappointment invaded him with the same intensity. Less than twenty-four hours after you told him you were in love, Sunghoon read the worst letter he could have read in his entire life. He had always wanted to travel and get to know countries, but suddenly he had a grudge against Switzerland because he knew that's where you were apparently staying. Why so far away? Why did you have to go somewhere with no explanation? A letter wasn't enough because it only said what he already knew: it had all been your father's plan. Sunghoon knew how much he controlled your life, but the thought of him causing it all made the boy's blood boil.
"Fuck everything" was what Sunghoon repeated most often every time he remembered something related to you.
How he remembered the first day he saw you at university, or how he heard you call him and greet him every time you met. He remembers every moment you were by his side, with your arms entwined or your head resting on his shoulder.
It was hard to forget every little moment when you and he almost kissed when you were drunk. Faces millimeters apart, heart racing and breathless… But then the day in your flat made it all worthwhile. While he was between your legs, kissing you with all the love he'd ever felt and fucking you on your kitchen worktop. Sunghoon could repeat that day a million times over, even though afterward you went and left him the next day. It was the one thing he didn't want to go through.
"You need to snap out of it, man" Jay threw himself on the sofa in Sunghoon's flat, sitting next to him on Saturday night. At times he was the only one who managed to make his friend feel a little better as they talked.
"How?" Sunghoon hugged the cushion, snuggling further into the sofa and staring at the television. He felt Jay's gaze on him as he listened to his friend talk again.
“I don't know, we—” Jay paused for a moment, sliding his body across the leather of the soft sofa and sighing loudly “How about we go out for a while? Just the boys.”
“I think I'd rather stay in my apartment for the next few years” Sunghoon replied.
Jay sighed again, reaching up and snatching the pillow from Sunghoon's lap. He scrambled up, wanting to take back the one thing he was hugging for comfort at the moment.
That's when he saw his friend's face in pure concern, but with something else that he couldn't decipher. Jay was serious most of the time, no one knew what he was feeling – apart from Stella – but Sunghoon knew his best friend so well that he could tell something was wrong.
“Jay” he called out, seeing that Jay was swallowing and straightening up on the sofa.
“Right, I can't lie” Jay closed his eyes ”I need to get you out of the house today and take you to a club on the other side of town.”
It was Sunghoon's turn to turn from curious to confused. What was Jay talking about, anyway? And why did he have to take him to the other side of town today? They worked in a bar, not quite a club, but pretty much the same thing: loud music, drinking and lots of people. Why go to a place that would be practically the same as his work environment?
“Why?” he asked Jay.
The older man was debating whether to say something so direct or simply make up an excuse to drag Sunghoon along. But Jay couldn't lie like he had said, it was almost impossible not to tell the truth to the eyes that stared at him so expectantly.
“Because Stella's taking Y/n there too” he said ”She's back, man.”
A ringing sound passed through Sunghoon's ears, as if the sound pierced his eardrums and he felt an extremely strong pressure in his head. Grateful to be sitting down and knowing that he would get this reaction, Jay was already getting him something to drink from the coffee table. Even though Sunghoon couldn't swallow anything or move, at least Jay was trying.
“Jay, stop fooling around.”
“I swear to God” he whined ”I found out today, Stella didn't want to tell me anything and just asked me to get you out of the house.”
“Why?” Sunghoon stared at a fixed point in the room, everything he was hearing seeming like a dream.
“I know as much as you do” Jay touched Sunghoon's shoulder, making him finally face his best friend ”It seems that only Stella and Alicia know that she's back, no one else. And a lot is going on that not even my girlfriend, Y/n's best friend, knows about.”
Sunghoon debated for a moment whether he should go to where Jay wanted to take him, because things were getting more and more confusing.
You went away and said goodbye in a letter, then you came back and only your two best friends know. At least about your return, because something is going on that even Stella doesn't know about, according to what Jay is saying. So… What was your father up to? That was the thought Sunghoon had as he forced his legs to get up from the sofa, resting his hands on the seat and standing in the middle of the room.
He didn't want to hope for anything at all, and he didn't know what your reaction would be, or even his own, seeing you so many months after your departure. Without exchanging a message, a single phone call. How would you see him afterwards? How would he treat you when he saw you face to face?
“I'm just going to take a shower” Sunghoon sighed ”I hope this doesn't go to shit, Jongseong.”
“Don't call me that” Jay pouted, which was ignored by Sunghoon as he headed for his room to shower and get ready.
Jay also hoped it wouldn't go to shit because no one knew what would happen. But he and Stella hoped that you and Sunghoon would at least talk.
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If it weren't for the primal tension between your meeting with Sunghoon, Jay could easily say that he was the most nervous in that entire club. Firstly because his girlfriend trusted him enough to ask Sunghoon to leave the house, but he knew he wouldn't be able to get his best friend out so easily. So telling the truth had been the best course of action. That was why he was walking through the door of that club, the colored lights spinning back and forth and the loud sound almost piercing his insides.
He kept repeating to himself a mantra that things could go smoothly if Stella had already poured you and Alicia some drinks, while he walked in with Sunghoon and Jake. The latter was trying his best to get Sunghoon to walk around people and not turn around and go home. They both knew he could do this at any moment, so Jay led the way into the bar while keeping Sunghoon in the middle and Jake behind in case the other wanted to leave without being seen.
None of them could imagine what it was like for Sunghoon to deal with all of this, although Jay and Jake were just as curious to know what was behind everything that was happening.
Meanwhile, Sunghoon was going over in his mind what he would say to you when he saw you in the first place. Say hello and run off? Or just wave and smile as he went to the bar and got drunk? Maybe he'd do the latter – and the one that was most recommended – because he felt like he might pass out at any moment.
“Right” Jay stopped walking for a moment, turning around and almost slamming his body into Sunghoon, who stopped walking abruptly. But that didn't stop Jake from tripping and slamming into his friend, muttering curses and standing next to the taller man “Let's get a drink before we meet them.”
“I can hang around the bar and you two go find your girlfriends” Sunghoon wanted to get out of there right away and would try anything to make that happen.
“You come with us, wise guy” Jake took him by the shoulders and led him to the bar.
Ordering strong drinks wasn't a big deal for three people who owned a very trendy bar on the other side of town. This could even inspire new drinks at the establishment, Jay thought as he saw colorful liquids and completely different names on the menu. Something that pleased even the palates of the three who sat at the bar and drank three glasses in a row.
Every minute in that bar seemed like an eternity and the fact that Sunghoon didn't want to face the reality that, almost certainly, he was in the same environment as you after such a long time. It wasn't as if he knew how to act because even though he was your friend and had been hiding the fact that he was in love with you for years, he had never gone so long without seeing you. And even less had something so intimate happened that you left without giving any explanation.
“Stella's calling” Jay picked up his cell phone after a long time talking to Sunghoon and Jake, trying to find the courage to get out of there too and pretend that they were randomly in the same club.
He picked it up and chatted very quickly, neither of the other two paying any attention because they were apprehensive about what would happen next.
“Alicia texted me” Jake finished swallowing the drink in his glass ”They're bringing Y/n to the bar.”
“Is it now or never?” Jay tried to smile, knowing that it looked more like a grimace to the two in front of him.
Sunghoon didn't even dare move, leaning against the bar counter as he played with the glass between his fingers. He needed to occupy himself with something other than the fact that he was only a few minutes away from seeing you again. His heart felt like it was going to burst out of his mouth and if it hadn't been for the alcohol warming his muscles, he could have sworn he was shaking right now.
“Hey, guys!” Stella's voice had a strange effect on Sunghoon, who cringed and closed his eyes tightly.
“Baby, you over here” Jay lied so badly, Sunghoon could laugh at that awful performance as he heard the kissing sounds of the couple greeting each other. Then it was Jake and Alicia's turn, the same greeting followed until his friends' voices ceased and he concentrated on the only thing that mattered at that moment.
“Y/n? You're back?” Jake was smiling, his tone a little more theatrical than Jay's. Sunghoon knew that he hadn't been the first to greet you because his best friend was so nervous that he could scream and run off with the other Park if it were possible.
“Jake, hey. Yes, I am!” you sounded excited, and cheerful and hadn't seen Sunghoon who was leaning back against the bar. He waved for the barman to fill his glass and as soon as he did, the liquid almost overflowed from the glass between his fingers.
“What are you doing here?” Alicia asked.
Sunghoon took the glass and brought it to his lips, the burning sensation going down his throat was the best in that second when he heard Jay answer.
“We came on a boys' night out. Me, Jake, and Sunghoon” he felt Jay's hand touch the middle of his back. Sunghoon almost spat out his drink out of nervousness, it was time to turn around.
Everything seemed to stop the second he laid eyes on you. Nothing seemed to have changed, except that you were even more beautiful. If that were possible. He pressed his fingers tightly against the body of the drink while keeping his gaze on yours, which, strangely, you held. Nothing on his face seemed to scream astonishment at seeing you there and Sunghoon couldn't tell if that was a good thing or not. He swore he knew you well enough until a few months ago before you left. But after that, he didn't know who Y/n was standing in front of him at that moment.
“Sunghoon” you said his name so gracefully. He almost gave in to all the pressure and the nervous looks among the group of friends staring at the scene before them.
“Y/n” Sunghoon said in the same way, raising his glass and drinking the entire contents in one go.
He suddenly felt his eyes sting because the last time he'd seen you, he'd left your apartment swearing he'd see you at his bar the next night. When he could finally ask you to be his girl, as he had always dreamed. And now here you are, as someone who took his heart to Switzerland and came back without a single explanation.
He saw you open your mouth to say something as the two couples of friends disappeared to the bar to order drinks. Sunghoon swallowed, wanting to turn around and order more alcohol. It was the only thing that could keep him standing there without doing something ridiculous. But he knew that wasn't going to happen.
“We—”
“I need to go to the bathroom” he interrupted you and he didn't know why, or maybe he did, he just didn't want to feel like crying in front of you. Sunghoon had whined enough for months and the pride that engulfed him was enough for him not to do it in front of you.
Not when he'd already had too much to drink and certainly not when you were looking on with so many emotions at once.
Sunghoon hurried off towards the club toilets, stumbling a few times and apologizing to everyone he bumped into. He hadn't meant to do that, to look like a runaway and a lovesick idiot. But he knew he couldn't predict a reaction, not when he had no way of denying that his feelings for you had never gone away.
He wanted to have stopped feeling anything for you, wanted to have turned that hurt and sadness into anger, and moved on. But every time Sunghoon thought he could move on, you appeared in one of his dreams. Or Stella would comment on something nostalgic involving you, making him remember how much he loved you.
It could be a ploy by his friends to never forget you, or that your best friend somehow wanted to keep you in mind because she might know something. Sunghoon knew it was, but he also had no way of confronting Stella and asking her to tell him. He knew that you might have asked for secrecy and he wanted to respect that, but he couldn't help himself because it all came back at once. And that's why he ran to one of the bathroom cubicles and locked himself in, sitting on the toilet and taking a deep breath.
What he wanted most was for you to come back to him, but why was Sunghoon wishing he wasn't around you at that moment? Why so much conflict when all he had to do was get out of that bathroom and talk to you?
“Hey Hoon, it's me, Jake” the boy's voice snapped him out of his thoughts, making Sunghoon get up from the toilet and quickly open the door ”Are you okay?”
A moment of silence and Jake noticed Sunghoon's eyes shining brighter than usual. He knew it could happen and it was understandable why it had happened so quickly.
“You don't have to answer, it's okay, man” he said, slipping one of his arms around Sunghoon's shoulders “What do you say we get drunk until you forget your name?
“I'd love to, but—”
“But just think about the drink, at least she's back. We can think about that later, okay?”
He wanted to believe Jake's words and how they could comfort him, even if he was still nervous. So Sunghoon tried to smile, finding a little strength in the friend next to him who was slowly getting him out of the bathroom.
Doing what Jake had said that night might not be so bad. Drink a lot, talk and think later.
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Sunghoon's last memory was of going to the bar with Jake and ordering three more drinks. After that, everything became a blur and now he had the biggest headache in years.
He was like a frat boy waking up the day after a party smelling of booze and with some random girl sleeping next to him. In contrast, Sunghoon smelled of soap, his pajamas were clean and no girl was next to him, but the messy bed indicated that he hadn't slept alone. Or so it seemed.
“What the fuck happened?” he muttered to himself as he groped around the bedside table for his cell phone or something, finding it practically dead.
Now the headache seemed a little worse as Sunghoon got up and sat on the bed, his back against the headboard as he sighed and tried to remember what had happened.
It couldn't be that bad or his friends would already be at the foot of the bed shaking Sunghoon and demanding explanations, so he could calm down a bit and slow down. To thought that things might not have gotten out of hand as he got out of bed and walked around the apartment looking for something that might remind him of the night before. But nothing was out of place, not even a sofa cushion.
He was alone in that place and there wasn't even a piece of clothing or accessory to make him think that someone might be there.
It was then that his thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the front door handle. The key turning outside and the sound of bags on the other side of the door… Jake or Jay was bringing something to cure his hangover and it made Sunghoon breathe a sigh of relief to see that his friends were thinking of him.
But his smile fell when you walked through the door. Not that he didn't want to see you there, but of all the people Sunghoon imagined… You, wearing one of his T-shirts and the pants from the night before, bags hanging from your arms, and your hair loose, was the image he never thought he would see clearly.
“Y/n?” he asked, taking you by surprise when you entered the apartment.
“You're awake!” your smile almost made him shout, but he made do and ran towards you to help you with the bags, quickly picking them up and taking them to the kitchen.
The small silence in the room wasn't awkward, but you seemed a little apprehensive as Sunghoon looked at all the bags, hesitating to look in your direction.
“Feeling better?” you asked as you stopped next to him, opening one of the bags and taking out a packet of coffee and a carton of milk.
“Did you… Did you do any shopping?” he looked at the things you were unpacking, then finally looked at you.
What the fuck, why is she so close? He almost cried at the closeness when he saw you looking up, a shy little smile on your lips as you looked at him.
“I did” you replied ”You need to stock that cupboard and I thought you needed something to eat after last night.”
After last night. Right, how could he say he didn't remember anything, especially that you were in his apartment?
Sunghoon didn't know how to say something like that, especially since you seemed so casual in his kitchen as if you hadn't abandoned him months ago. As if you and he hadn't been apprehensive in each other's presence the night before.
But on the contrary, you seemed quite at ease taking food out of the bag and sorting it on the kitchen worktop. The almost familiar scene of the last time you and he had met, warmed his heart slightly and made Sunghoon feel his chest tighten. Fear and nostalgia washed over him as he watched you casually turn on the coffee machine after putting the supplies away. Every time your gaze crossed his, Sunghoon felt like shouting and asking what you were doing there. Perhaps the last part he could do.
“What are you doing here?” he asked after a long time without saying anything, just enjoying – even if fearfully – your presence in front of him.
“I brought you home after you nearly passed out in the bar last night” you smiled, even though your gaze was on the coffee machine and the sound of the liquid falling into one of the cups.
Sunghoon sighed heavily and leaned on the kitchen worktop, facing you and at a safe distance from the other side. If he were standing next to you, you knew you wouldn't be able to control yourself.
“And what happened?” he decided to ask, to be honest at least ”I don't remember anything…”
“I didn't think so” you laughed. A laugh so genuine that Sunghoon almost jumped over that counter to kiss you the way he wanted.
“So… tell me” he asked softly, almost in a whisper, but you heard him nonetheless.
Waiting for the first cup of coffee to be ready, you handed it to him while he prepared another for you. Sunghoon took it and drank the dark, bitter liquid, knowing that it could help with his hangover.
“Neither Jake nor Jay could get you to stop drinking yesterday” you began, your gaze following Sunghoon's every move as you watched him drink the hot, bitter coffee.
“And what did you do?” Sunghoon asked, apprehensive about the answer.
Suddenly a flush rose to his cheeks and he thought it might be the steam from the coffee you were preparing, but as soon as you looked away, he knew something else had happened.
“I thought on impulse and kissed you” you managed to grab the freshly prepared cup, causing Sunghoon to almost choke on his coffee.
Now he felt like a complete idiot because, after all this time, you had kissed him and he hadn't remembered?
“It was quick, enough to make you drop the glass” you said ”Then you asked me to bring you home because… Well…”
He ran his gaze all over your body, forcing himself to remember a little more of what was going on. Sunghoon doesn't remember the feeling of your lips on his again, but like a memory retrieval, he could visualize getting into your car together with you. The drive to his apartment and how you helped him undress so he could shower.
You hated that he slept smelling of booze since university… Why didn't Sunghoon think of that as soon as he woke up? Only you could make him clean himself up even when he was drunk.
“And then you asked me to sleep with you because…” your voice faltered a little, your gaze lowered to the liquid in your cup as you vividly remembered Sunghoon's words ”Because you didn't want me to escape again.”
Drunk or not, he didn't regret having said that to you. Sunghoon's only regret was not being sober enough to have enjoyed the time he had with you since you entered his apartment. But now that time could be rewarded as he left his cup on the counter and walked around to stand in front of you.
“I really meant that, Y/n” he said, smiling weakly when you also left your cup on the counter to turn to him.
You didn't have to be a genius to know that Sunghoon was leaning in the next second and capturing your lips in a slow kiss. Knowing the man in front of you well, you even thought it took him long enough to do it. Fighting his demons and fears of losing you again, but at the same time pushing it all away and concentrating only on having you in his arms again.
The way he grabbed you and sat you on his kitchen worktop, his hands sliding down your thighs – unfortunately – clad in the pants from the night before. As your lips moved against his, Sunghoon felt a spark in his body thinking that this could only be a dream. Because one night he was moaning yet again about you, being dragged out by Jay. While the next day he had you sitting on his bench, kissing him so lovingly as if you weren't the cause of the pain and fear he felt.
You were the first to break the kiss, gasping for air in your lungs from the euphoria of kissing Sunghoon after so long. He stood between your legs, foreheads pressed together as he felt your breath against his lips.
“Why did you leave?” he asked suddenly, his hands squeezing your legs without much force, but enough for you to know that he wasn't going to let you go.
You sighed once more, your lips brushing against his as your hands traveled the length of Sunghoon's arms until they reached his shoulders.
“My father,” you whispered, ”he wanted to control so much.”
“Like what?” Sunghoon lowered his face to the curve of your neck, inhaling your scent which seemed to calm him down a little. The feeling of comfort that settled over him when you sighed and pressed him against your body.
Sunghoon didn't want to leave, to stay with you forever in that position or your arms. He could forget everything that had happened and focus on the present moment while he relished the sensation of your hands against his skin or your skin against his lips. But not everything could be that simple, not when your phone interrupted the whole process.
The noise of the handset could have been ignored if it hadn't been so annoying to you. Apologizing to Sunghoon, you sneaked close enough to grab the handset from the other side of the worktop, still holding the boy between your legs as she alternated your gaze between him and the phone.
“Answer it” he whispered, smoothing your legs and trying not to kiss you while you answered.
As much as he wanted to do that, he wanted to hear you grumble while he kissed your neck or to hear you fight with him for making you make embarrassing sounds to whoever was on the other end of the line.
“Hi, Dad” well, maybe he really could do that then.
Sunghoon's lips slowly brushed against your chin, listening to you grumble as you spoke to your father. He already didn't like the older man, so it wouldn't hurt if you said Sunghoon's name out loud while he spread kisses all over your skin. Going down to your neck, tugging at the collar of his T-shirt – which you wore so beautifully – Sunghoon wanted to mark your skin.
“I… I didn't tell you I was back, I'm sorry” so not even your father knew about your return to the country? That was intriguing, it almost made him stop kissing your skin. But Sunghoon remained strong, convinced that he wouldn't stop until you said his name.
“No, I can't do that… Shit” you almost let out a moan when Sunghoon nibbled at the perfect spot on your neck, matching the exact moment when he pressed his hips against yours “Stop…” you whispered to him as you moved the device far enough away so that your father wouldn't hear.
“No” he smiled and sealed your lips, letting you go back to talking to your father.
“Dinner? But…” you faltered a little, trying to concentrate on the bullshit demands your father was trying to make of you. Without taking into account that you were going to Switzerland to try to get away from him and the way he tried to control your life, “I'm not going.”
“But we need to make arrangements for you to meet Owen, after all, his father and I still think you two should get married.”
It was careless of you to put the phone away just as your father raised his voice on the other end of the line, echoing loud enough for Sunghoon to hear. You could have waved it off, disconnected the call and pretended that nothing had happened, but you knew it was too late when you no longer felt Sunghoon's ringtone.
He moved away from you slowly, his eyes focused on your face as he tried to explain what he had just heard.
You didn't even manage to answer your father properly, disconnecting the call straight away and putting the phone somewhere else on the worktop.
“Sunghoon…”
“Getting married, then?” he took a few steps out from between your legs, but remained standing in front of you.
“I'm not getting married, I just—”
“When were you going to tell me?” Sunghoon asked, his tone wavering as he continued to stare at you “When the date is set?”
“I've already said I'm not getting married, Sunghoon. My father…”
“Did he set you up? Was he going to set you up with some business partner's son like in those shitty movies where you, rich, fall in love with a piece of shit like me, but are promised to someone full of money?”
Sunghoon never changed his tone of voice in all the years the two of you had known each other, it had been so different that you never imagined yourself in that scenario. Not even when you met him the night before, expecting him to yell at you and do something to hurt you. But no. Here you were again, hurting him as you had done.
“Sunghoon, I—”
“Please, go away” Sunghoon walked over to the sink, his hands resting on it and his body forward, staring at anything in the dishes that was interesting enough for him not to look at you.
“But—”
“I told you to leave, Y/n” the harsh, squeaky voice made your body cringe, you got off the counter and didn't dare approach him, even though you wanted to wrap your arms around him and tell him what was going on. You thought he would listen to you, but Sunghoon seemed adamant.
Your body couldn't move, although you needed to get out of there when your vision started to blur and you felt your chest tighten. Sunghoon didn't hear any movement from you, so he turned his head to find you standing there in his kitchen.
He was no longer ashamed to cry in front of you, nor did he think he'd be able to hide it when it all mixed and pooled in his eyes, trailing down his cheeks, not unlike you.
“Please, leave me alone. Please, Y/n.”
The pleading cut through your heart and you knew it was all because of you. Because you weren't able to say anything to him or even stop your father from saying all the shit he always said.
There was nothing left to do but leave Sunghoon's apartment, even though you wanted to stay. You knew that going back wouldn't be a good idea, but you didn't think you'd experience any of it either.
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“You're staying with us tonight, aren't you?” Jay's voice was a little louder than the music playing in the bar. Sunghoon turned to his friend and smiled weakly, admiring his persistence in thinking he would stay there on a Friday night. Even though he knew there was a good chance you'd show up.
He still didn't know how he was feeling after what had happened, and he also avoided Stella's little requests – through Jay – for him to text you or come to your apartment. Sunghoon had no idea what to feel or think in that situation, making his mind work on various scenarios that he created himself.
Thinking that you could have gone to Switzerland with that man your father had mentioned on the phone, or worse, he thought about how long you had been promised to someone rich and disgusting who had been your old father's choice. While Sunghoon could barely provide you with a decent life. Not that you needed it, because he knew you had enough money to buy his bar if you wanted to. A decent life was all you didn't need from him. That's why maybe someone from your world, the way you lived, would be better. That's why your father seemed so convinced of this, without ruling out any possibility that you might already be with someone else.
Not that he was that other person, there hadn't even been time for Sunghoon to make a formal request or even say that you were his. There was no time at all.
“I'm going home” Sunghoon replied after getting lost in his thoughts, seeing Jay's worried look in his direction.
The tray carrying the empty glasses went straight into the sink, and Sunghoon washed and sanitized them properly before leaving them to drain and waiting for Jake or Heeseung to finish the job.
“Really?” Jay leaned against the opposite side of the sink from where Sunghoon still stood, looking at the people coming in and out of the small dance floor. They were drunk enough to wave to Jake, who was pouring them a drink at the moment.
“Really, I think I need a rest” in reality, he didn't need a rest, he was just avoiding meeting you there in case you went. And Jay knew that very well.
“Okay” he conceded, no longer wanting to push Sunghoon to say anything about it. He got up from where he was to walk over to his friend, ruffling the boy's dark, sweaty hair in front of him “Anything, call me, okay? I'm not drinking tonight because Stella and Alicia will probably want to leave here loaded,” he said, making Sunghoon laugh ”So I'll be chauffeuring you all night. Don't hesitate to call me if you need anything.”
“And neither will I” Jake appeared next to Jay ”I drove here today and I can drop Alicia off at home if you need us at your apartment…”
“Boys' night?” Sunghoon joked.
“Come on, it's only desolate, sad girls who can do that?” Jake pouted and picked up a clean glass, grimacing at his two friends as he walked away to serve another group of people who had leaned over the bar.
Sunghoon felt terrible to see his friends' efforts to make him well, even if he didn't want to be sinking like that into something that was only hurting. He wished he could stay at the bar or even accept the boys' invitation to do something, but all he wanted was to be home. Maybe cry some more – out of resentment or anger – and drink whatever was in the fridge, then fall asleep until the next morning.
And that's what he did when he got to his apartment, at least the drinking part. He took off his shoes and coat, then went to the fridge and got three cans of beer. He sat down on the sofa and opened them one by one while thinking about his life recently.
He knew that sleep would be a long time coming because with every sip of beer, he wondered why all this was happening. Sunghoon had seen movies with this theme before, he had even heard of a book that Stella read about a rich guy who fell in love with a girl who wasn't rich. The only difference was that his story with you was the complete opposite. Sunghoon wasn't rich at all.
Laughing at life's misfortunes, he finished his third beer and risked opening the bottle of wine that Jake had bought and left at his friend's apartment for the next time they were all together. Perhaps he wouldn't mind if Sunghoon drank it all, because the occasion called for a little more alcohol and until the next meeting between friends, he would certainly buy Jake another bottle. And if it was for the heartbreak reason, which it really was, he knew his friend would forgive him for taking it all himself.
“I don't think that's going to be enough” Sunghoon muttered to himself as he opened the bottle and took the first sip of wine, the strange mixture of the previous taste of beer and the smooth grapes of the current drink. He had mixed a lot of things before, but this one was strange. Not that it mattered at the moment, Sunghoon just wanted to finish that bottle.
To feel nothing but sleep or for all that sensation to fade from his body, at least for a little while. Just long enough for him to recover enough so that, when he saw you again, he wouldn't act like an idiot in love. Even though you might be in the arms of someone other than him. Even if you were going to share a life with someone other than him. Sunghoon thought he was too late in proposing to you because he had wasted so much time without saying anything.
From the moment he met you at university until years after his courses ended, he was only able to talk about his feelings because you did it first. And even then you tore it all away from him in a matter of a short time. But even though it happened, if he had told you he loved you even before all that, Sunghoon could have enjoyed a little time being yours and you being his. In his arms.
And not that empty bottle of wine he was holding, hoping it would be you there.
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Sunghoon usually woke up from his nap with his cell phone ringing in the early hours of Friday morning. Jake or Jay calls and he refuses to go to the bar to finish the drinks so that everyone would go home drunk. But now his nap had been interrupted by frantic knocks on the door.
The first thing he did was glance at the clock hanging on the opposite wall, showing that he had been asleep for less than twenty minutes. The empty bottle of wine was neatly placed on the coffee table in the living room and he had closed his eyes while still sitting on the sofa, without bothering to lie down or go to the bedroom.
The knocks continued and Sunghoon began to get anxious because the rapidity with which the noises were made against the door indicated that whoever was there was in a hurry. And maybe his friends needed him because something might have happened. Jay and Jake weren't drunk, as they had said in the bar before he left… So what could it be? He didn't want to think about anything else and ran the few steps from the sofa to the door, taking a long breath before opening it.
His hand trembled slightly against the handle as he turned it slowly and, with his other hand, Sunghoon unlocked the door.
He could have seen it through the peephole before opening it because the look of astonishment on your face when you stood in front of his apartment door wasn't something you could have rehearsed. You could see that Sunghoon wasn't expecting it and, strangely, you didn't care whether he liked it or not. It was as if you had already predicted that his reaction would be total astonishment.
Sunghoon couldn't say anything, amazed and even a little stunned by your presence there. Stopping to analyze the whole situation, your clothes were quite different from the ones you usually wore. No social attire, elegant clothes, or high heels. Instead, you were wearing jeans, a button-down shirt three times your size, and a completely messy ponytail. Your breathing was so ragged that you could only take deep breaths while looking at him.
“Y/n?” Sunghoon practically whispered as he stared at you trying to take it all in. Afraid he'd say your name a little louder and it was just a drunken dream he was having.
To his surprise, you just nodded and took a step forward, still panting as you walked far enough into his apartment. Facing him squarely.
Already preparing yourself for the question he would ask, such as “what are you doing here?” or whatever, you tried to act on your feelings and prayed that he wouldn't interrupt you this time. The speed with which your lips touched his even shocked you because you didn't think you'd have such good aim just by lifting your own feet high enough to reach where you most wanted to touch him at that second.
Processing the event while still half-drowsy, Sunghoon smacked his lips to yours and then pulled away. Inches away from your face just to try to assimilate that you had just kissed him, and when you grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him against you again, he let himself go.
It wasn't as if he was going to stop you from kissing him, even though he had mixed feelings. But neither was he going to deny that he was kissing the woman he loved so much.
He was the first to give the go-ahead to deepen the kiss, opening his lips to receive your tongue and feeling you press your fingers into his shirt. When your tongue tangled with Sunghoon's, he put his hand around your waist to press you against him. His free hand closed the door in the same second to push your back against the cold wood and trap you between it and the tall, slender body in front of you.
In a contest of longing and need, your tongue and his played in sync as you felt Sunghoon's hand slide under the fabric of your shirt. Touching your skin and almost sending a shock through your whole body when he ran his short nails along your hip. A screaming need to feel him in every corner of your body, you craved it as much as he did and tried to show it as you kissed him even more.
Even though it was an almost impossible mission to say everything you felt for Sunghoon because it was beyond words and all you wanted was to make him understand you. That he would listen to you because surely his thoughts about everything that was happening were completely wrong. You wanted to prove it to him. And maybe you were on the right track.
When Sunghoon ran both hands down your hips, to your ass, and down to your thighs, the two slaps there were enough for you to understand that he wanted you in his arms. On his lap. And you didn't hesitate to jump up and wrap your legs around his body when he picked you up.
“Take me to your room” you smiled against his lips, slowly sliding down when you both needed some air, going to Sunghoon's ear “We need to talk.”
“About what?” Sunghoon's breathy voice was so attractive and exciting, that you could swear you almost moaned just from the memories it brought back.
“About us” you felt Sunghoon's arms squeeze your body in his lap, but at no time did the boy show any resistance as he pulled you away from the door to take you to his room.
The whole way was done in silence, feeling his gaze on you almost the whole way, except when he paid a little more attention so that he didn't hurt you or stumble by mistake. Even more so when your lips did a great job against his cheek, going down to his jaw and neck. It bought you time between Sunghoon's slow steps and the time it took you to think about how to start that conversation once you got to his room.
Why, what would you start by saying? And how would you start? Because telling Stella, Jay, and Jake had been easy. Smooth, even, with the possibility of your friends judging you. But because it was Sunghoon, the main character in all of this, things seemed to be even more complicated.
Your thoughts were interrupted when the two of you reached his room, Sunghoon slowly standing you up as he passed the door and closed it. His eyes glazed over your figure as he waited for your next move. His mind would have to work a million different ways now. Afraid that he would kick you out of the apartment once again or not listen to you explain while you had a lot to say, something crossed your mind and you prayed that it would work out. Not least because you'd need to concentrate on every word while you did everything you wanted to do.
One of your hands went to Sunghoon's abdomen, slowly moving up to his chest and giving it a gentle push. It was nothing compared to her strength and his size, at most moving the boy's body a centimeter in front of you. Enough for him to take a slow step backward.
“Sit down” you instructed softly, slowly pushing him towards his bed. You tried your best to make your voice sound calm as you watched him nod and walk backward to the bed, sitting down and leaning against the headboard. Your smile slowly followed his, but Sunghoon held his breath as you climbed onto the bed to sit on his lap, both hands resting on his broad shoulders.
“What are you doing? Weren't we going to talk?” he asked, his voice shaky and wavering as he felt your weight on his lap. Sunghoon frowned, not because he hated having you on his lap, on the contrary, but it had never crossed his mind to have a conversation in that position.
“We will” you leaned your forehead against his ”But I'm afraid you won't let me talk, so I thought I'd do something.”
“What thing?” Sunghoon asked when he felt your breath against his face, your warm breath against his freshly kissed and still reddened lips. You smiled, but he couldn't capture the moment because he had just closed his eyes to revel in every little sensation you gave his body.
Sunghoon had completely forgotten the old feeling that he didn't want to see you anymore, that he was avoiding you at all costs. He forgot everything the moment he felt your lips on his when you arrived at the apartment, and now, feeling you holding his face between your hands. Your little fingers caressing his skin – which would have been stained with tears tonight if you hadn't been here – and trailing around his jaw to his lower lip. You didn't respond immediately, nor did he complain when he felt you kissing him again.
It was like being addicted to something and needing it to live, regardless of whether he deserved it or not. Sunghoon knew he wouldn't be able to go on without kissing you and without having you. He didn't want to think about a world in which you wouldn't be with him as you are right now. Sunghoon just wanted to feel your tongue entwining with his slowly, urgently, and intensely. Your heavy breathing against his mouth almost drove him crazy, not least when you were rocking against his lap.
It was too much torture to feel you like that, the clothes getting in the way as you slowly rolled over in his lap. His cock, once semi-hard, was now hard enough to rub against your jeans and the pants he was wearing, creating the perfect friction for both of you.
“Fuck” he moaned against your mouth, stifling another moan when he felt your nails against his shoulders. Sunghoon wasn't going to question whether that was an effective method of conversation, but if you wanted to start like that, he wasn't going to stop you.
He ran his big hands down your shirt, finding your ass very well synchronized in slowly rolling over, at the same intensity as your tongue played with his. It was as if you wanted to make him feel the same movements inside your mouth and on top of your lap, as your clothed pussy rubbed against his cock.
“Sunghoon” you moaned his name, an extremely low blow. This made Sunghoon's fingers squeeze each side of your buttocks, stopping your hip movements.
“Do you…” he sighed, his heartbeat accelerating as you pulled your mouth away from his ”Do you want to talk like this?”
He looked like a lost, needy little animal, his big eyes staring at you and his chest rising and falling in gasping breaths. Such a beautiful sight that you missed it, and having it again was something you didn't want to miss.
Releasing Sunghoon's hands from your ass, you intertwined your fingers with his and left them next to your body, on the side of your thighs. If your expression wasn't so passionate, he could have sworn it was some kind of tease as you moved back against his lap.
“I want you to pay attention only to what I say” you whispered, squeezing his fingers and letting out a low moan as your clit rubbed exactly against his jeans and the head of his cock at that moment. That was all you needed “Can you do that for me?”
There was a minute's silence as Sunghoon pondered this because he couldn't concentrate on anything other than the movements you were making. It would be difficult to focus on your words while what he wanted most at that moment was to be inside you.
“I'll try” he managed to say before he felt you slip out of his lap.
The loss of contact made Sunghoon a little dizzy because he felt his cock ache, that friction was all he needed, but losing it suddenly made him feel weak. He looked at where you were, standing next to his bed as you unbuttoned your jeans and left only your big shirt. It was a punishment that it was that big and covered half your thighs… Why couldn't you wear one of the shirts you normally wore? They were small enough to go halfway down the buttons of the pants you wore, and not nearly as dressy as that one. He also didn't think about why you were undressing, let alone why you had gone back between his legs and now it was your fingers' turn to open the buttons on Sunghoon's pants.
“Y/n, what—” he tilted his head back and leaned against the headboard, his eyes closing and his breathing completely heavy as you lowered the fabric of his pants enough to free his cock from the tightness of his jeans and hold it over the fabric of the briefs he was wearing ”Fuck, you…”
“I want you to understand that whatever I say is true” your thumb perfectly drew the line of his cock head covered in pre-cum that had already soaked through his underwear. Sunghoon moaned loudly at the touch and squirmed to try to get your hand away, feeling the slight slap you gave him before looking him in the eye.
Eye contact alone could make him come right there, without any further ministrations from you. Sunghoon could free himself in his boxers as he felt you draw circles on the head of his cock, but it couldn't be that easy. You weren't going to provoke him because he didn't deserve that at all. He deserved to be taken care of, to listen carefully to what you had to say, and, perhaps, to understand every word. He just prayed that everything would be said clearly, even if he was struggling against your touches to pay attention to the words.
You knew that the body language between the two of you was a great connection because when your fingers slid into the waistband of his pants, Sunghoon didn't even think to help you remove the fabric along with the underwear he was wearing, his cock being released in a mixture of relief and pain, slapping against the belly covered by the T-shirt he was still wearing. The garments went halfway down his thighs before he saw you move far enough away for him to pull them off and throw them on the floor beside the bed. Now with his lower half completely bare to you, exposed like that, Sunghoon knew he wouldn't be able to concentrate on anything. Not with you kneeling between his legs again.
“I want you to believe me, Sunghoon” you whispered as you leaned in, your face close enough to his to say it, ”Do you?”
He was quiet at that moment, just staring at you and hoping that something would formulate in the back of his mind. Sunghoon would believe… But in what? What, exactly, would he have to believe? What would you say would have to be done just for him to believe? Sunghoon's mind wasn't working very well at that moment, he seemed lost and excited and just agreeing was enough for you to continue whatever you were doing. He would only accept at that moment, fighting against any greater urge before actually listening to you. Or feel you, because he didn't know what you would do first.
Watching your slow movements as you slid between his legs, your face lowering just enough to get close to his cock and your mouth touching the head smeared with pre-cum.
“Fuck you” he muttered almost as a roar of relief when he felt your hot mouth suck the tip of his cock. The pop when you released it made Sunghoon moan low and almost cry from the contact.
Your hand firmly gripped the base of his cock, the narrow veins running along the length that filled you so well last time. You made eye contact with him the second your mouth returned to spilling the mushroom, the tip of your tongue making the perfect circle before your lips slowly slid down his cock.
“Shit, Y/n” he moaned. The sensation of having his cock swallowed by your warm, soft lips was divine. Your tongue felt his vein fissures and your throat accommodating the glans when you reached the bottom. You slid his cock out once more, but without taking it out completely as you did the first time, establishing a rhythm so slow that Sunghoon might have thought he was being tortured.
The torture in your eyes fixed on his, with your mouth full of his cock as you moved your head up and down in a rhythm that you set yourself to suck it. Sunghoon knew – and anyone else in those conditions – that it would be impossible for you to say anything at that moment, so delighting in your mouth around his cock was the perfect moment. Sunghoon wrapped his already-tangled hair between his fingers, taking advantage of the ponytail hairstyle he'd done before so that he could hold onto you with one hand and the other wrapped around your jaw.
“You're doing so good, babe” Sunghoon said, his thumb caressing your cheek and spreading a little of your saliva that fell each time you took his cock deeper into your mouth until it touched your throat. He moaned your name every time you proved that your vomit reflex was in perfect condition. You took him so deep that Sunghoon knew he could come right there, in the warmth of your lips as he felt you speed up your movements.
He pressed his thumb against your jaw as you moved your mouth up and down his cock faster, your gaze never leaving Sunghoon's fucked face above you. Your name was said with each heavy breath and the moans he let out were like the most beautiful melody you could have heard in your life.
“I'm going to… Y/n, please…” Sunghoon didn't want to come so quickly, he didn't want to look so weak for a blowjob as well done as yours. And it seems that you didn't want him to come so soon either, because your mouth began to move slowly down his cock until it stopped completely. Your tongue makes the same circle around the head of his cock until you let go, again, with a pop.
How pornographic that sound could be when accompanied by Sunghoon's hoarse moan at the same moment. You knew your panties were wet enough just from the sounds and feel of his cock inside your mouth, but you didn't care anymore. Not when you also had to concentrate because your words weren't finished. You had a few more things to say to him. Before returning to Sunghoon's lap, you discarded your sticky, wet panties, almost in the same spot next to the bed where his clothes were, and it was only at that moment that you returned to your old spot – his lap.
“You drive me crazy, you know that?” he was visibly stunned and you secretly liked that effect, the hint that he didn't want to see you had finally disappeared and now the faint smile Sunghoon was giving you was the perfect indication that he had your undivided attention.
“In a good way?” you asked, your tone low and your hips hovering in the air so as not to touch your naked pussy to his cock just yet.
“In the best of ways” he said, tilting his head towards yours to capture your lips this time.
It was Sunghoon's turn to start the kiss a little less slowly than the two of you had shared so far. His hands held your face on either side and he could feel your jaw moving during the kiss as his thumbs made the perfect line to your chin. And you knew that this would be the perfect moment since Sunghoon's hands were busy holding your face, he wouldn't stop you.
You slid your hand between the two bodies and gripped his cock, taking advantage of the fact that your saliva would be the perfect combination of lubrication with how wet your pussy was. Then you simply slid the head of his cock between your folds, opting to tease him another time, and slid it in far enough until it found its entrance. It didn't take you long to slide his cock in effortlessly.
“Fuck, shit. I—” Sunghoon didn't have time to reason or even say anything to you when his cock was already completely inside your pussy. He wouldn't deny something like that, he wouldn't stop you, but feeling your pussy swallow his cock without any warning was one of the most delicious sensations he'd ever felt.
Sunghoon's hands left your face to grip your hips before you could start any movement. He didn't want to teach you anything, he wanted to let you guide yourself as you felt most comfortable, but he needed to feel the way you moved as well as have his cock inside you. So when you raised your hips for the first time and then lowered yourself in a not-so-slow movement, he tightened his fingers on your hips in response, moaning your name.
“Sunghoon” you moaned, but you wanted to call him out as you put your idea into action. He just grunted as he felt you move again on his lap, your pussy swallowing his cock so well that it was hard to say anything “I want you to unbutton my shirt while I talk to you…”
“Fuck, no” he moaned as you went down on his cock again, a little faster this time.
He didn't want to deny it, but it was hard to concentrate. So Sunghoon knew he had to be guided, and you knew you had to do it when you took his hands and led them to the first button of your shirt.
“Just concentrate on that and my words.”
He wanted to ask if this was how you behaved when you were the boss of the company or when you had to deal with someone from your work or even your father. The authoritative yet cautious way you spoke to him made his cock twitch inside you. And he wondered how it was possible for you to keep your tone while resting your hands on his shoulder and forcing your legs up and down on his cock.
Sunghoon leaned his head back against the headboard, the moans becoming frequent and released without any pause. The sound of slapping skin as you began to hump faster, his pelvis meeting yours, and the wet, squishing sound of your pussy every time you swallowed him. His fingers were trembling as he managed to unbutton the first button, moving down to the second and losing himself for a moment when the walls of your pussy squeezed him tight.
“I'm not going to make it with you… squeezing me like that…”
“You can do it, Hoonie” he could have easily turned you against that mattress and fucked you so hard with his hooded provocations and authoritarian requests in that situation. But he didn't have the strength, let alone the courage, to disobey your requests while you slowed down your movements because you knew it was hard for him. Sunghoon managed to unbutton the second button and went down to the next one, his eyes slowly opening to look at you.
Your smile was angelic even in the position he was in and the way you were rubbing up against him. Now, going back and forth with your clit deliciously rubbing against his pelvis and, when you moved a little more, you could rub against his cock covered in all your essence before getting just the tip inside your hole and sliding it into you again. He didn't want to ask where you'd learned it or if you'd even practiced, maybe Sunghoon was lucky enough to have been the first to feel it because you were so horny that you tried out the wildest fantasies in your mind. And that's exactly what it was, but you'd never tell him.
“Sunghoon” you called him again when your rolls and movements became less intense. You still kept them up but in a more sensual way. You wanted to emphasize your words and let him finish the buttons on your shirt. He looked you in the eye, the shine in that gaze and the intense way in which Sunghoon stared at you was the certainty of everything you felt. You leaned forward, your slightly sweaty forehead touching his and your panting breaths mingling with each other “You're the only one for me.”
“What?” he finished unbuttoning your shirt, given the circumstances of your slow movements. A respite for the poor man with a hard-on and his hard, aching cock being swallowed by your pussy.
Opening your shirt and revealing your bra, he didn't even bother to look at the lace or anything else, because your voice was the only thing he was concentrating on at that moment. The two of you kept staring at each other until you finally took off your shirt and took the opportunity to get rid of your bra, knowing that you had tortured Sunghoon enough to make him unbutton every button.
You pulled away from him to pull up his shirt, and he was quick to get the message and get completely naked, just as you were on top of him. You leaned your forehead against his again, your skin glistening against the light in the room and the sweat emanating from your shared activities.
“I don't want anyone but you” you kissed his lips slowly, moving your hips back in the same way ”I've never been with anyone but you and—”
Sunghoon knew it was enough, he knew he just needed that confirmation. Even if you'd been trying to say it all along and he was too stubborn – and jealous – to listen. He wanted to suffer in silence rather than listen to what you had to say. But after today and what you did, he could no longer have any doubts about the things that were happening.
Giving him all to reverse positions, pressing your back down on the mattress, and getting on top of you, Sunghoon lined his cock up in your pussy without wasting any time in being inside you again.
“Say it again,” he whispered as he began to thrust his cock into you. Sunghoon's face lined up on the curve of your neck as he thrust his cock into you at a slow but strong pace. The sound of his pelvis against your skin was enough to make you forget your words. Now you understood why he couldn't speak so perfectly when you were on top. It was hard to think of anything coherent while you felt his cock going deep inside you.
“I don't… Shit” you moaned softly as his cock drove deep, hitting the perfect spot inside your warm walls and making your nails slide down his back. Sunghoon kissed your neck, smiling against your skin at the effect he caused just by slowly thrusting his cock into you. “I don't want anyone else but you” saying it quickly hadn't been a mistake, not least because you knew that once he heard it, it would be enough to feel you faster.
And that's what happened. As if you knew him so well, Sunghoon raised his face to look at your every expression as he began to fuck his cock into your pussy. The fast, strong movements made your body sway beneath him and the overwhelming sound of your arousal coursed through his cock every time it moved in and out of you. Sunghoon rested one hand on the side of your body, the other gripped the headboard so tightly that his fingers might have hurt afterward from the force with which he held on. But it was all a consequence of all the sensations repressed while he fucked you as he pleased.
Sunghoon ignored the burning in your back caused by your nails in his skin, and he also ignored the fact that your thighs were squeezing him so tightly that, if it weren't for the speed with which he moved his hips against yours, you would surely have been able to stop him in a few moves. But he wouldn't give up, he wouldn't stop.
“I can't take it… I can't…” you pulled his face close to yours, mouths too close together.
“Do you want to cum?” he asked, your nod the only source of confirmation as you moaned his name against his lips.
Sunghoon nodded too, knowing he wasn't that far away from you as his cock throbbed inside your pussy. The way you sucked him so well was the perfect indication that he had to come right there to claim what was rightfully his. Your pussy and all of you.
He let you kiss him again, messy with drool, totally sloppy as he felt his hips stutter in their movements. You were getting more and more desperate and this was proven by the way your moans were swallowed by his lips and your pussy clenching him tightly.
It wasn't long before you came against his cock, the muscles in your pussy convulsing around his length. Without delay, Sunghoon knew you wouldn't be strong enough to take it, so he came straight away. The load of cum he poured into your pussy was hot and thick, every part of you squeezing him, milking his cock a little more until the last drop of cum he poured into you dried up.
Gasping and with your lips still pressed together, you gave one last loud sigh after moaning his name against his lips. Smiling along with Sunghoon as you both recovered a little from your rapid breathing.
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He didn't want to open his eyes at that moment, afraid that everything would happen again. You and him having sex, and then Sunghoon found out that you were leaving for another country, and that made his heart hurt even more when he opened his eyes and didn't see you on the other side of the bed.
Sunghoon could have sworn he had hugged your waist the entire night after the two of you slept together, but you were no longer by his side. Again.
A lump formed in his throat at the thought that this was happening again, and even worse after you said everything you said. It wouldn't be indicative of anything if you spoke and still walked away like you did with him. Was that why you had asked him to believe you? So you could have another night together and now you're going to another country? Well, what would it be this time? It would have to be something further away than Switzerland because Sunghoon swore he could travel there after you again if that was the case.
Not wanting to think about it anymore, pushing away his blurred vision with a strong breath and trying not to focus on the tightness he was feeling in his chest, he stretched his hand beside the bed just to feel for his underwear and put them on, quickly leaving the room without paying attention to nothing else. It wouldn't be new for him to be left by you, but this time Sunghoon had to put an end to what he was feeling because he couldn't afford to be chased, to listen to you, to have sex with you, and then watch you leave. He couldn't allow that because Sunghoon would suffer every time, while he wouldn't know why you did all that.
He wanted not to think about those things, he wanted not to feel like crying as he walked around the apartment. But in vain, a tear had already fallen down his cheek and before Sunghoon even wiped it away, he almost felt his heart come out of his mouth when he found your figure in the kitchen.
You were wearing his t-shirt from the night before, and your eyes were focused on the small recipe book as you had some ingredients in front of you. With the sound of his footsteps, your attention was no longer on the words written by Sunghoon's grandfather in that worn notebook, but rather on the crying boy standing at the kitchen door.
“Hey, Hoonie” you would smile if it weren’t for the sight of Sunghoon’s cloudy eyes and wet cheek. You quickly walked towards him and held the face of the man in front of you, wiping away the second tear that was about to fall down the middle of his cheek “What is it? What happened?"
He wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you into a tight hug and sniffling softly against your hair.
“I thought you were gone again” he whimpered, letting a few more tears fall as he felt you hug him.
Relief would be best described in the middle of that hug, over any feeling Sunghoon swore he felt after waking up. He felt your lips kiss his bare shoulder and then slowly slide down his arms until you faced him.
“I’m not going anywhere anymore” you smiled, kissing him on the lips “And that’s why we need to talk.”
“For real now, right? Without my dick inside you?”
“Sunghoon!” you slapped his arm as you walked away, hearing the boy's captivating and welcoming laugh.
He noticed you were making his grandfather's famous coffee, or trying to replicate the little details. Just like he did that day in your apartment. The nostalgic moment brings him back to the day you told him you were in love with him. You revealed your feelings and let him say them too.
As you went back to preparing coffee, you felt Sunghoon's arms wrap around your waist and hug you from behind. He rested his face on your shoulder to pay attention while you concentrated there.
“I think I'm ready to listen to you now” he said as calmly as if he hadn't been almost desperate minutes before.
He also wouldn't say that he thought about traveling to another country if the scenario repeated itself. Maybe you thought he was crazy, or not so much because you knew Sunghoon enough to know that he would be capable of that since his first feeling was denial that you came back this time. Now all he had to do was go after it if it happened. What he wouldn't do and you would say so clearly to him.
“You were right when you said that my Dad tried to set me up with a partner’s son and everything…” Sunghoon knew there was no way to hide the tightening of his muscles, the arms around your waist tightening a little more and the jaw resting on your shoulder becoming harder as he listened to you. You knew this would happen, so you had to be quick in your explanations “That’s very much a movie scene, isn’t it?”
"What?" he asked, trying to ignore the amusement in your tone. This wasn't fun at all, why were you making it out to be?
“The Dad trying to arrange a marriage for his daughter and the heiress of his company” you laughed softly as you poured some coffee powder into the machine, focusing on the mixture of sugar and cinnamon that was described on the sheet on the other side of the counter “But my life it’s not a movie.”
"What do you mean by that?" Sunghoon was visibly confused, his hands resting against your stomach.
“I mean that—” you stopped yourself, hearing the coffee machine start to make noise as it prepared the liquid that the two of you would drink right away. Turning around in Sunghoon's arms, your hands finally palmed his bare chest. “My father tried to control this in my life, but he couldn't. And that’s why I went to Switzerland.”
If he was confused before, he was even more so now. And as he listened to you calmly, everything, even though it made sense, left him shocked.
Sunghoon knew that your father always tried to control everything in your life, and it was one of the biggest reasons why you always vented to him. Having someone control almost everything for you was extremely annoying, a tremendous invasion of privacy. But as soon as you learned that your father wanted to make you marry his business partner's son, it sounded like a ridiculous joke to you. It was a movie you could see with Stella at a movie theater as they discussed how life tried to imitate art, but not when you objected to it.
“That night I showed up at your bar crying, it was because I decided to leave for Switzerland without anyone knowing. I wanted to escape yet another choice in my life made by my father” you sighed slowly, Sunghoon's fingers caressing your waist through your – his – t-shirt. You felt his lips slowly against the top of your head and you smiled because they remained there “Only you knew through that letter. I didn’t even tell Stella, but… I knew you would show her and the boys, so it was okay because I trust you all.”
He moved his lips from your head to your forehead, breathing deeply against your skin. Now that things were starting to make sense, Sunghoon swore he felt even more angry towards your father.
“This trip was to organize my mind on how I would face my father in this situation because it wasn't easy to make him change his mind” you sighed “Well, you heard it on the phone that day.”
“Unfortunately” he whispered, not wanting to interrupt you even if you wanted to hear him.
The noise of the coffee machine interrupted your thoughts for a brief moment, then you turned back in his arms to pour a good amount into the two cups in front of you. Sunghoon slid his arms around your waist again, still hugging you and not wanting to let go so soon.
“I came back because I decided to lead my own life, I didn't want him to do that for me anymore” preparing the coffee was done with a shaking hand because you felt like crying every time you thought about the fights against your father.
The harsh words he said to you while you refused to follow what he wanted for you. Of all the years he was in control of your life, it was time for things to change. You felt a feather-light kiss that Sunghoon placed on your shoulder when you signaled that the coffee was ready. He picked up the cup and walked to the other side of the counter so he was facing you.
“And also because I resigned from his company because he simply said I couldn’t get married when I was already committed to someone else.”
He almost spat out his coffee when he heard it come out of your mouth so nonchalantly. Those new attitudes from such a carefree Y/n were not something Sunghoon was used to, especially after you gave an innocent smile as if you hadn't said the craziest thing out loud.
"You're kidding, right?" he tried to catch his breath after coughing a few times, resting the cup on the kitchen counter “Y/n, you can’t do this.”
“I can and I did, Sunghoon” you smiled with your lips against your cup as you sipped your hot coffee “I talked about being in love with you since university, that I didn't want to be the boss of that shit company anymore and that I quit because I simply I wanted to have control of my own life and do what I wanted.”
As much as it was something he wanted to hear at all costs, Sunghoon couldn't be selfish enough to let you miss out on things because part of you had told your father about your feelings for him.
“Did you tell him about me?” Sunghoon asked, seeing you nod as you drank more coffee.
Possibly your father had cursed Sunghoon the moment he heard you say that he owned a bar and not the owner of a company. He knew this should have happened.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” your voice took him away from his thoughts for a while, he picked up the cup of coffee again, looking at the dark liquid now, trying not to focus on your intense gaze.
“You can’t just give up your life for your feelings, Y/n.”
“You mean the money?” he didn't see the eye roll you gave, otherwise he would scold you for it and continue saying how wrong you were for doing those things.
“I mean that—”
It hurt Sunghoon to have to think, and to be about to say that out loud. But just as you were being sincere, he could tell you what he thought too. It wouldn't be a judgment on his part and he hoped you wouldn't be offended, especially because he also had the right to think that way.
“The guy your father wants you to be with has money and a good life” he bit the tip of his tongue at the thought of another man being with you. Even if it was to make his father happy, Sunghoon just couldn't do it. “He's from your world, Y/n.”
"My world?" your shaky voice made him look up from the coffee to your face. You looked strangely sad, and he didn't want you to feel that. You should be happy, maybe, Sunghoon also didn't know what to think anymore.
“Yeah, he has money, I don’t” Sunghoon took a big sip of coffee “We’re from two different worlds, you know?”
“No” you replied quickly, the thud of the cup against the counter on the other side made Sunghoon shrug his shoulders momentarily.
"Why not?" he placed the cup back, walking around the counter ever so slowly to get closer to you again. He wanted to touch you and you would possibly hit him because of the way you were looking at him. He didn't want to see you like this either, but he risked pulling you against him and bringing your face closer to his.
“Because I don’t want a world where you’re not in it, Park Sunghoon” your pout dismantled him at that moment, matching the shape of your words “You are my world.”
Fuck your father's opinion and thoughts and Sunghoon's pride in trying to think that you should follow another path. He wouldn't be stupid enough to push you onto someone else, not when you were there, openly saying that you gave up a lot of things because of him. Much of it was because of you and your wishes, but if that included Sunghoon, he wouldn't waste it.
Sunghoon kissed you so slowly, feeling the taste of the freshly drunk coffee and your warm lips against his. Your hands quickly went to his hair and Sunghoon hugged you so tight, afraid you would run away and believe his words from minutes ago. Fuck money, fuck everything. You said he was your world, and he wanted to be your world just like you were his.
“I love you” Sunghoon whispered after kissing you, his lips still hovering over yours “I love you so much I don’t want you to leave.”
“I love you so much more” you whispered back, snuggling into his arms as you felt Sunghoon’s heartbeat against your chest as you felt him hold you in that hug. “And I’m not going anywhere without you now.”
“Promise?”
“I promise” you kissed his lips once again, and Sunghoon could scream with happiness to finally have you in his arms.
Being able to wake up every morning and feel your body on the other side of the bed with the certainty that you wouldn't leave. He knew he would have to face your father sooner or later, but he also knew that your request the night before to believe in you was what was worth it. Sunghoon would believe in you at all times because being together with you, nothing else mattered.
“By the way” you smiled slowly when he began to undo his arms around your body, moving away so he could return to the other side of the counter and drink the rest of the coffee. He would prepare food afterward because the drink alone wouldn't be enough.
“Say it, love” he encouraged you when he didn’t hear you continue. Raising an eyebrow at you as he brought the cup to his lips to finish the contents and pay attention to what you had to say.
“Is there space at your bar? I don’t want to be without work.”
Sunghoon truly laughed as he walked back behind you, leaning down enough to place the cup into the sink. He wouldn't imagine someone like you working in his crazy bar, not when you didn't behave like the people who worked there. Not even Stella would work there.
“Maybe you should ask Stella for help with this, baby” Sunghoon kissed the side of your neck, causing a slight shiver to run across your skin “I don’t want you to work in my bar because I know the type of customers I have there.”
"Jealous?" you joked.
"Jealous of you? Definitely” he nibbled your skin, watching you shiver even more.
Continued to laugh at your reaction and your protests about being a good employee, maybe even better than his three best friends. You could team up with Stella and attract more clientele to the bar, even if the establishment doesn't need it. It was Sunghoon's turn to feel a shiver run down his spine at the idea of ​​men staring at you or trying to flirt with you, just like he saw them doing with any girl who frequented his bar. Now that the two of you were together, he knew that being jealous was nothing compared to what he would experience with you.
But if it was the same way he was being, laughing at your protests, receiving your kisses as he scooped up the pancake batter, and listening to you grumble about wanting to work with Stella now, he would love to live by her side. Because you were his world, just like he was his.
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© ikeuverse, 2023. do not copy, translate or steal my stories.
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eightstarr · 1 month ago
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at the count of three — ellie williams.
summary: how do you tell your best friend you’re in love with them? ellie has an answer! just be cool and wait for the right moment— and the next. and maybe another one, just to be sure. if you get impatient, you can always take a deep breath and count to three! (years, that is)
warnings: slow burn (childhood friends to lovers <3), little bit suggestive but no smut!
notes: born from a piece of dialogue i wrote like, a year ago and completely forgot about but somehow a week later it's 4k words? idk you're welcome or i'm sorry!!! also yes they do spend almost every scene sitting together on a couch but that's what lesbianism is all about...
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・。.・゜✧・. ────
ONE!
A movie plays on the TV, a slightly tarnished DVD of an 80’s action flick starring some oily guy and the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen— Ellie doesn't remember much other than an obnoxiously epic soundtrack and lingering shots that made the plot twist too obvious about 20 minutes in. 
She's freshly eighteen; you’re ahead only by a couple months. It's a warm Friday night, Joel and your dad in the kitchen putting scraps together for a mildly healthy dinner, Ellie sitting on the very opposite side of the couch from where you are. It’s hot, she'd said, looking away from your comically insulted face that grew with every scooch she made from your side, a lame excuse to save her from the newly found (and fucking torturous) fluttering that sparks in her stomach whenever she sits too close to you.
From the kitchen comes the sound of a can hitting the floor, followed by Joel’s 'shit!' and then quickly, 'sorry, girls'. You chuckle, turning to Ellie and catching her staring at you. A wrinkle forms between your eyebrows at the same time a pink warmth floods her cheeks. “Dude, you’re not even paying attention.”
“I am,” a scoff, her eyes now strictly committed to the screen. “The noise distracted me,” she adds, knowing it didn't even make her flinch from the careful study of your side profile.
“Scaredy cat— ow!” a pillow crashes against your cheek, sudden enough to shock you, too soft to do any real damage. “What the fuck?”
Ellie raises her eyebrows and looks at you from the corner of her eyes, a smirk half hidden by her hand. “Don’t be rude, you're missing the best scene.”
You throw the pillow back and scoff when she catches it, your lips slightly pursed, the signature sign to tell you’re annoyed. It's almost identical to the replica of that gesture that sits at the end of her last journal entry, an overly dedicated sketch born from a wandering thought. She could make it more accurate, she thinks now, soften the line of your jaw, take the scar on your cheek a little more to the left.
The sound of water splashing from the TV catches her attention and Ellie snaps her head forward (lest she get caught staring again), just as the blonde haired love interest is walking out of a fancy looking swimming pool.
“She’s hot,” you say, fingers pulling absentmindedly at loose threads on the rip of your jeans. When Ellie doesn't say anything, you turn to look at her, “You don't think so?”
Her voice comes out a higher pitch than she’d like. “What—” she clears her throat before continuing to mumble, “I don't know, I guess.”
You laugh. “You guess?” 
“Yeah, I— I don't know, dude, I wasn't thinking about that.”
You watch the nervousness on her face, the gulp that passes her throat, the red under her freckles. Fondness tugs at your chest and your voice softens just slightly, a smile playing on your lips. “Oh my God. Ellie, it’s okay,” green eyes find your face and she sees you hesitate for a second before you shrug. “Who cares? It's just me.”
You make it sound easy. It's the most distinct thing Ellie remembers about this moment, how suddenly safety felt like the most obvious thing. TV light on your face, your arm over the back of the couch, the same eyes she's been looking at since she was fourteen. Of course it's okay. Everything else with you is easy, why wouldn't this be the same?
Ellie shifts on the couch, the distance between you turning quickly ridiculous— offensive, even. She’s embarrassed to have let her flusteredness get in the way, but the urge to be closer doesn't feel right either. Everything she does feels like too much, everything she says too intense. “How long have you known?” she asks.
You tilt your head, less of a question and more of a guidance, “Known that you…”
Ellie parts her lips, unsure of whether or not she’s gonna say it or how, trying to will the words to come out. And they do, she remembers it well, because it was the first and maybe the only time she was this direct about it. “That I like girls.”
The smile on your face is teeth-rotting sweet, but she only gets to bask in it for a second before you widen your eyes and lower your voice to a scandalized whisper. “You what?”
Ellie rolls her eyes, cheeks burning, “Oh, fuck you.”
Your laugh fills up the room and the fluttering in her stomach feels absurd at this point, like she would actually be able to feel those annoying little butterflies flying around if she were to press her hand against her abdomen. “Sorry, sorry,” you say, and for a terrifying second Ellie thinks maybe they're loud too, and you’re able to hear them. But then she looks at you and forgets about it, easy easy easy. “It’s really okay. You know that, yeah?”
“Yeah,” she says. For once, there's not a glimpse of doubt about it to be found.
You watch another ten minutes of the movie in silence before your dad's head peeks out from the kitchen to call you both to the table for dinner.
Ellie has a habit of eating like it's her last day on earth. When you were both new residents of Jackson, hungry and scared and not at all used to the idea of a full plate of food twice a day, she couldn't help it. And you were the same, hence why your dad thought it would be good for you and Ellie to spend time together, which quickly turned to being around each other basically every minute of every day. But as the weeks passed, you seemed to be learning to adapt faster. A younger Ellie found this frustrating— especially after that time Joel complimented your table manners.
You’re just… nicer, she remembers saying, a stressed frown on her still childlike face, fiddling with a box of marbles she’d found under her new bed. She remembers how you pulled one out, your fingers brushing against her own for the first time ever, and held the clear crystal with green stripes next to her eyes, a satisfied smile at a practically perfect match. You’re nice too, Els, you’d said, shrugging your shoulders, the marble shoved inside your pocket, I think I just lie better.
Until that moment, Ellie had never thought about it that way; the fact that you could be pretending to feel more confident and comfortable than you really are to make yourself safer, to get people to like you. But when she asked, you swore you had never lied to Ellie. She used to drive herself mad thinking about that, a strange, confusing worry gnawing at her chest— she likes that you don't feel the need to lie, but what does it say about how you see her? Is it that you don't care if she likes you? Or worse, is it that you know that she already does?
You sit in front of her today at the same dinner table, four years later, and watch her practically inhale her bowl of pasta like no time has passed at all. You let out a snort and Ellie wonders if you can see it even now, if her constant thoughts of you are obvious even when she looks this busy.
"What?" she asks, an immediate frown on her face, though she's done you the honor of swallowing her mouthful before speaking.
"You're so gross," you say, chin resting on your palm, tilting your head like you're looking at some thought provoking art piece. Ellie thinks you'll leave it at that, but then you reach over and swipe your thumb over the red spot of sauce next to the corner of her lips, so soft she barely feels it. You watch her frown soften for a second before it becomes even deeper.
Ellie feels like her whole body is exploding with warmth, too hot under the hoodie she's wearing, too pink across her face. It's so obvious, she thinks, it's so— fuck, pull it together. Her gaze follows your finger as you bring it to your lips and lick off the sauce. “You’re disgusting,” she retorts lamely, her hand rough when she brushes it over her mouth, lest you notice another stain and she has to watch you do that again.
You are familiarly not deterred by her meanness. Or her attempt at it. "And you eat like a five year old,” you shrug. “I guess we both have our issues."
Ellie catches herself staring at your hands for the rest of the meal, certain that she's never noticed them in the same way before. How much time has she been wasting? You both have your issues, you'd said, but Ellie thinks she has you beat. Yours can't possibly be anywhere near this dangerous.
─────✧・゚: *✧・
TWO!
Someone's knocking on her door. Ellie sniffles and lets out a groan as she gets up from the couch, sore throat, her limbs heavy and tired. She knows it's you because it's always the same three knocks; the first two firm and loud, a pause, and then one tiny one that sounds almost like 'sorry'. You’re impatient but still painfully afraid to be rude— if she loved you a little less, Ellie thinks she would make fun of it a lot more. But alas, she's cursed to smile at it every time.
She opens the door and the breeze that slips in makes her fall immediately into an embarrassing coughing fit. “It’s fine,” she mutters, at the same time you’re saying jesus christ, Ellie. “Shit. I’m okay,” she clears her throat and finally gets a moment to look at you, all pretty and put together in your best shirt and a freshly showered scent, the sun setting behind you like a perfect frame. Ellie prays her lungs don't betray her again and tries to make the brush of her hand over her messy hair look casual instead of desperate.
“Well, I was gonna ask if you wanted to come to the party with me for just a few minutes, but… I’m not sure you should be out of bed,” your worried frown is pretty, too. What a cruel fate. “Is Joel home? I can stay—”
“No, no, you’re good,” Ellie shakes her head, arms crossed over her chest like maybe it’ll cover up enough and you won't notice she was wearing the same long sleeve the last time you saw her. “He’ll be here in like, five minutes. I’ll be fine, ’m not a baby.”
You’re both nineteen by this time, Ellie remembers because you wore the same pretty blue shirt that you're wearing now for her birthday, and it was the day she realized her crush was no longer deniable. It's easier to act like nothing’s happening when she feels like she's alone in it, like there's no universe where you could love her like she loves you so she might as well let the fantasy die— but then you put on your shirt that's reserved for special occasions just to come over and bring her the cupcake you made, and suddenly Ellie can picture herself with her hands on each side of your waist, pulling you close, saying thank you with her lips brushing against yours before she kisses you. She can see it so clearly that it startles her, changes everything. Her birthday comes with a punch to the gut and a hunger she wants to tell you and only you about.
“You’re not gonna be bored? I really don't mind staying until he gets home.”
Ellie thinks (dramatically, extremely nineteen—) that if she lets you take care of her, she might actually die. It felt like she almost did last time you visited, your face serious with concentration as you pressed the back of your hand against her forehead. ‘You're warm’, you said, ‘do you feel sweaty?’ Ellie stared up at you, eyes glossy and heavy from sleep. ‘Not really’, her fingers sneaked out from under the blanket to wrap themselves around your forearm, a moment of bravery or delusion, ‘your hand feels nice’. You chuckled, ‘okay, keep it’.
She’s less feverish today, but not yet recovered from the greedy voice in her head that begs her to keep you close. If you don't go to the party now, she thinks (knows) that she’ll let herself casually talk you into staying the rest of the night. “Nah, don't miss your party,” she says. “I’ll be okay, Joel’s gonna teach me how to play that old card game.”
You raise your eyebrows. “So you're gonna argue all night.”
“No— what?” Ellie scoffs. “It’ll be good, I learn fast.”
“Yeah, because you make up your own rules.”
“I have questions about the rules, that's not the same thing.”
“It is if you cheat—”
“I’m not a cheater!”
You hum, a curious tilt of your head, and Ellie rolls her eyes before the words are even out of your mouth. “No, I guess you’d have to have a girlfriend for that.”
You watch her run her tongue over her teeth, her shoulder against the door frame. “You know I could say the same to you, right?”
“Too bad I said it first,” you shrug, pretty smile stretching your lips. “I guess I'll go, then. I’ll come over when it's done so you don't miss me too much.”
Ellie tries to maintain her composure. You know, she thinks, do you know? You must know. You can't know— “Right. Also so you can steal my food and crash in my bed, I’m guessing.”
“When you’re all vulnerable and weak? What do you think of me, Ellie?” you frown sadly, a hand over your heart.
“I think I know you,” she says, the corner of her lips lifting just a little, inescapably.
You walk to the gate and turn around as you close the lock, your hands on either side of your mouth as if she’s miles and miles away. “I’ll take the couch!”
“Yeah, sure!” Ellie yells back, her voice pretty even when it's hoarse, knowing she’ll hold on for just about ten minutes before she insists you take the bed instead.
Joel stays awake with her until around 10pm, when his yawns become too many to hide and he’s already let Ellie win three games, his smile genuine and wide while she chuckles and pretends she doesn’t notice. He leaves her with a tupperware of soup for tomorrow’s lunch and a deck of cards. To teach your friends or— I don't know, keep on the coffee table, he’d said, make you look cool. Ellie’s not sure you would find a box of cards ‘cool’, but she’s not above trying.
Ever since she moved out to the garage, she’s discovered a new type of stress at the notion of having you over. At Joel’s house, all she ever did to prepare for guests was pick up the dirty clothes from her bedroom floor and put her books in a (wobbly) single pile. Now things are different. The garage is small, but it's all hers— her floor, her living room, her kitchen. She can't have you thinking that she can't take care of things on her own.
She spends the next hour moving things around until finally, two loud knocks. A second passes; Ellie looks at the cards and considers shoving them inside one of the drawers on her desk. By the time the one quiet knock comes, she shrugs and decides to leave them on the coffee table, lest Joel was right and she misses a chance to have you start thinking she's cool and mysterious. “It's open,” she says from the couch, tiredness soon catching up with her after all that time rearranging things.
The door opens and you come in, quickly closing it behind you, a relieved sigh at the loss of that crisp, cold breeze outside. “Did Joel forget those?” you ask, bent at the waist as you take your shoes off, your chin pointing at the deck, the only thing on the coffee table. Maybe she should've been more subtle with it.
“Uh, no,” Ellie scratches the back of her neck, her legs stretched across the couch. “They’re a gift.”
She's not sure you hear her over the groan you make as you stretch your arms above your head, her legs moved to the side automatically to make space for you to sit. You fall down with a sigh and both forget about the cards— you, distracted by the warm tingly feeling of a couple drinks, and Ellie by the new jacket you’re wearing.
She lets a million different scenarios spin around her head for a couple seconds before she blurts out the question. “Whose is that?”
“What?” you turn your head away from the movie playing on the TV.
“The jacket.”
“Oh,” you look down at yourself as if you’ve just remembered it’s there. “Maya was leaving too, so she walked here with me. It’s hers.”
Ellie hums, her back sliding a little further down the couch, legs spread. “Stinks like it’s hers.”
You chuckle before you can help it, her animosity ridiculous and charming— Ellie’s better with actions than she is with words. “I don't even know what you're talking about,” you shake your head, not quite slurring, but not too far from it either. "She smells like strawberries."
Fuck Maya and her strawberry shampoo. Ellie could get some if she wanted to, maybe if she traded— what the fuck is she thinking about? She rolls her shoulders back and pushes the thoughts away, gluing her eyes to the screen. “Sure,” she says, less because she agrees and more because she doesn't wanna hear what else you like about Maya. “You had fun, then?”
“It was alright. You didn't miss out on too much,” the end of your sentence stretched out by a yawn, you cover your mouth lazily and rest back fully against the couch. “Jesse was drunk. They had to stop him from getting up on a table.”
Ellie chuckles. “I don't know, maybe he had something to say. I think I would’ve let him.”
“That's what I said,” you smile and let your head fall to the side, your cheek against the cushion. She feels you staring, enables it for a while by acting oblivious, falsely over-invested in some movie she can't remember the title of. She hears you move closer before she feels it— the shuffle of your clothes, the stupid jacket rubbing against her couch, so easily forgettable by the time your temple falls on her shoulder.
Ellie's about to fall asleep when she hears the little noise you make, something like a sniffle. For a worrying second she thinks she might’ve given you her cold, but then she feels the tip of your nose brush against her shoulder and she realizes you’re trying to breathe her in. 
“You always smell nice,” you whisper, half asleep.
Ellie swallows and prays to keep her body completely still, scared she’ll make the wrong move and have you pull away, scared you’ll lean closer and be able to hear the fast beating on her chest. She sounds breathy, “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” you say. “Like fresh rain.”
Slow like the roll of credits playing on the TV, Ellie feels how every muscle in her body settles down, relaxed, content— fucking cocky. She wraps her arm around your shoulders and hopes the scent will rub off on the jacket and remind Maya of a cloudy autumn night, rain over her garden.
─────✧・゚: *✧・
THREE!
"Do you think we would've liked each other?" you ask, your legs resting on her lap while she fidgets mindlessly with the ruffled cuff of your socks. Every patrol lately ends the exact same way, a quiet walk home and a joint on Ellie’s couch. "Back when the world was normal?”
Ellie turns to look at you, blinking lazily, a reddish hue over her green. You’re not sure if she's more tired or high, but either way you're not doing much better— everything you’ve said during the past hour is the kind of thought you have when you're alone at night and your brain wanders, moments away from falling asleep. It's a meaningless question, but Ellie lets out a soft hum and thinks about it like it's worth considering. You're not sure if anyone you’ve met in your whole twenty years of life is as willing to indulge you as she is.
"Yeah," she says decidedly, in the same tone with which one would say duh. "We—" a yawn cuts her off, slender hand rubbing one of her eyes. "We would be friends, like, in college."
"I wouldn't be in college.”
Ellie frowns, takes one last inhale and discards the joint to the ashtray on her coffee table. "Why not?"
"'Cause I'm not smart like you," you shrug.
The fold between her eyebrows deepens. "You're smart," she argues, with enough conviction that you almost believe her, insisting, "You are."
"In other ways, sure—” Ellie opens her mouth to interrupt but you get ahead of her, “I’m not trying to talk badly about myself, I just don't think college would be for me.”
You’ve never been the most disciplined. It’s hard to imagine yourself staying up late to study, taking diligent notes in class. It feels ridiculous.
“I’d be working somewhere, I think. Making coffee for people or something.”
Ellie pauses before she nods, adjusting her daydream to what you’re saying, strangely committed. "Then we would meet there,” she makes it sound like the easiest thing in the world, a natural equation. “I'd go get coffee from you."
You chuckle. "You don't even like coffee that much."
Ellie shrugs, soft pink lips curved in a smirk that tells you she's sleepy and serves to warn you of the horror that's about to come out of her mouth.
You groan. “Don't—”
"Maybe I like the pretty girl that's making it."
“Awful,” you push her shoulder away, barely any force behind it, her giggles swimming comfortably around your head. “Never speak again.”
"Not my best work?" she asks, her fingers wrapping lazily around your shin. Too much, her brain warns, but then she remembers the pad of your finger over the back of her hand last night, the cursive lines with no purpose other than to be touching her— and it feels right, or like it's not enough. Too much soon turns to coward.
"Possibly your worst.”
She might be going crazy, but lately Ellie feels like you’re looking at her differently. In your eyes there's something gentle, awaiting, a tracing of your eyes over her face that says please. She chews on her lip, her eagerness painful. “We would like each other,” she doesn't think there's a world where you wouldn't, and if there was… "I'd make you like me."
You raise your eyebrows, teasing, "Oh, so like now?"
Her lips part with genuine surprise, more amused than offended. “...I made you, huh?” 
You regret the joke as soon as it comes out of your mouth, immediately brought back to your fourteen year old self, lonely and admittedly captivated by the auburn haired girl from next door. Flashes of you rushing to catch up with her, untied laces on your too tight sneakers, Ellie, do you wanna be friends? The sound of pages shuffling and her voice reading in whispers in the dead of night because you asked, can you talk to me until I fall asleep? Infatuated from the beginning, obsessed. Even now, on her couch, after spending a whole day together— do you like me? Would you like me, always?
A pillow crashes against the side of her face, her laugh almost louder than the embarrassed pounding of your heart. You pull your legs from her lap and lie back, fold your arms over your face. “You're so annoying.”
A lie so obvious it makes Ellie smile. She shifts to crawl closer, one knee on either side of you. “C’mon, I was joking,” she leans forward and you feel her knuckles tap your arm like she’s knocking on a door. The power to make you shy is still foreign to her, makes her feel drunk, thrilled. She doesn't remember having it before, but of course it was there. In little ways, in daily, simple things. Your eyes always looking for her first in any room, lighting up even after an especially bad pun, tracing her arms when the day becomes too hot to keep her jacket on. You like her, of course. How much time has she been wasting? The breath she lets out feels like it's been waiting to be let go, years spent stuck in her lungs. Ellie wraps her fingers around one of your wrists, her voice sweet, achingly soft. “Want me to tell you why I know I’d like you?”
You lower your arms just slightly, eyes peering up at her.
“Yeah?” she tilts her head.
You nod, arms coming down, unusually quiet.
Ellie grins, victorious. “Okay, but fair warning— it's worse than the coffee thing.”
You chuckle. “Is it?”
“Very.”
“Hm,” you hum, pretending to think about it, distracted by the vision of her practically sitting on top of you. Freckled face framed by the hair that's escaped her usual bun, softly lit by the warmth of the lamp on her desk. “Alright,” you say finally.
It takes Ellie a second to respond, momentarily dazed by the thought of being pretty enough for you to ogle like this. She clears her throat. “You ready?”
You tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear and away from her eyes. “Sure.”
Ellie waits for the nerves to come, but even as she parts her lips to speak, they never do. What a kind fate. “I know I’d like you because nothing’s ever made more sense to me— I’ve been doing it since I was a kid. I like you enough for a million lifetimes.”
You look at each other, bask in a moment of understanding. Your eyes on her lips, a hand on her waist that pulls her closer. “That was worse,” you agree.
Ellie moves to rest on her forearms, cages you in, her nose brushing against yours. “I told you.”
She waits, feels herself count once again, a final time, one, two—
A hand against the back of her neck brings her in and the quiet noise of her surprise vibrates against your lips, makes her smile into the kiss for just a second before the hunger takes over. Her hips readjusting over yours, knees pressing against your sides, Ellie kisses like it's a need rather than a whim. She takes and takes and swallows every sigh you make like it's a gift, four, five, six seconds of a messy trail of kisses down your neck to say thank you before she resurfaces again.
“Love you,” she breathes out, because suddenly all that talk about ‘like’ feels stupid— immature, incomparable to what she actually feels for you. “Need you.”
You moan against her lips and it's her favorite sound in the whole world, immediately, as quick as realizing she would fall in love with you the day she met you. “Love you, Ellie.”
A kiss to your clavicle, your hands pulling at her shirt and her thigh between yours. She makes you say it three more times.
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ddejavvu · 1 year ago
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can i request spencer reid w bau!reader and their married but reader forgets to put her wedding ring back on and derek’s asking spencer about what happened/if theyre having marital problems and spencer starts panciking but she just forgot about it in her pocket😭
Derek's brow is knitted in real, authentic concern when he corners Spencer in the BAU's kitchenette, and it turns Spencer's stomach. Usually, Derek has a teasing glimmer in his eyes, but it's scarily absent today, and he braces a large hand on Spencer's lanky bicep.
"Pretty boy," Derek starts, and his tone is soft, soothing, kind, "Anything you wanna talk about? I'm here if you need me, y'know."
Spencer tries feigning calm, which is terribly hard to do as someone who's fraught with nerves constantly, but he keeps an even tone when he speaks.
"I don't think so. Should I want to talk about something?"
Derek smiles sympathetically, almost a grimace, and Spencer feels a flash of fear run through him. Has Derek heard something about his mom?
"I don't think anyone else has noticed yet," Derek assures Spencer, "But I saw Y/N's not wearing her ring."
It's not what he'd been expecting, dreading, but it's not pleasant either. Spencer's eyes dart hurriedly to your hunched form, shoulders bent and crowding your desk as you devote yourself entirely to your paperwork. Sure enough, your wedding ring is absent from your finger, leaving an uncomfortably blank space on your skin, and Spencer's brows knit together.
"I didn't know," Spencer admits, keeping his voice to a low murmur, "I- But- we aren't having any problems. I don't think."
Derek shoots that awful pitying grimace his way again, and Spencer shakes his head, his stringy hair flying.
"No, no- we're not- we're not having problems," He asserts, but he's not sure if he's trying to convince himself or Derek more, "I mean, we bickered about coffee this morning, but not- not marriage problems bad. She just forgot it."
Spencer knows what expression will be on Derek's face if he looks, so he doesn't. He busies himself with stirring the rest of the sugar into his coffee, excusing himself before Derek can press the issue even further.
On his way out of the kitchenette he snags a donut from an open box on the counter, slipping a napkin beneath it and trying not to rush to your desk. He doesn't want to seem obvious, but he's a flaming bundle of nerves.
"Angel," He gets right to the point, placing the donut beside your hand on the desk and leaning over the back of your chair. He nestles his cheek to yours, pressing his lips against the curve of your jaw and blocking your conversation from view of the bullpen with the way he shrouds you from behind.
"Spence," You begin, alarmed at the sudden ambush of sugar, both literally and figuratively, "What-?"
"Are you mad at me?" He asks, sounding rather like a child worrying to their parents. You're only more confused after his question, and you tentatively shake your head.
"No? Should I be?"
"I don't think so," Spencer hums, "But you're not wearing your ring."
You blink, glancing at your bare ring finger.
"Oh!" You gush, your shoulders pressing back against his own as you maneuver your hand into your pocket. It's difficult sitting down, but you retrieve the ring and jam it back onto your finger, "I took it off earlier because I was taking the trash out. I didn't want it to get all goopy, and I guess I just forgot it was in there." You let your explanation hang in the air for a moment, but your eyes flash with sympathy, remembering Spencer's initial question, "Oh, Spence, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to freak you out."
"It's okay," He breathes out a shaky sigh of relief, reluctant to straighten up from where he's hugging you from behind, "You didn't even freak me out. Morgan did."
You laugh, and the sound soothes those frayed nerves in his chest, the ones that had lit with sparks of panic at Morgan's pity, "Well, don't listen to Morgan from now on. However," You reach for the donut, tearing it in half and holding one end out to Spencer while you catch the other between your teeth, "If it means I get donuts in apology, maybe I'll forget my wedding ring in my pocket more often."
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mattyriddlesbitch · 6 months ago
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Oh my good oh my GOD kinda modern au,. Slythern truth or dare happenings- the dare mattheo is to look through readers camera roll and showcase the most embarrassing photo. Reader thinks nothing of it and forgets about the set of nudes taken that got sent to no one. But then you see his face redden and jaw clench and then it just continues but he confronts her after
Yes! I gotchu!
Truth or Dare
Mattheo Riddle x F!reader
Warnings: Oral(Female receiving), fingering, cussing, unprotected sex
18+ Minors DNI!
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You were sitting with your friends, Pansy, Mattheo, Theodore, Lorenzo, Draco and Blaise after one of their parties ended, all of you still pretty drunk, but slowly sobering up. You guys were playing truth or dare and it was Theodore’s turn.
“(Y/N), truth or dare?” He asked from his spot as he laid on the couch.
“Dare.” You smiled, kneeling in front of the table on the floor.
“I dare you to let Mattheo go through your phone to show us your most embarrassing photo.” Theo smiled back.
You handed your phone to Mattheo, who was sitting on the couch that you were in front of. You didn’t know Mattheo had a crush on you. But Theo did. And he saw this as a chance to let Mattheo go through your phone without you caring since you were drunk.
Mattheo looked through your phone, smiling as well. He stops scrolling, smile fading slightly as his face reddens. He stares for a few seconds more before scrolling again. You almost missed the way his jaw clenched. After a few moments, he found a picture and showed everyone, making them all laugh, but he stared at you. His eyes roaming over you in an almost possessive way. He gave you your phone back and leaned back on the couch, keeping a fake smile.
People slowly excused themselves to bed and finally you decided to as well. Mattheo excused himself, too, offering to walk you back. You just nodded, a little too tired and still a little tipsy to care. He walked you with a hand on the small of your back.
Once you reached your dorm, he closed the door behind him. You sat down on your bed, taking off your shoes before realizing he was still there.
“You okay?” You asked him.
“You had nudes on your phone.” He said bluntly as he stared at you.
Your face heated up, remembering the nudes you took. You did it just to feel good about yourself, not to send to anyone. “Fuck. I forgot about those.”
“Clearly.” You could hear the irritation in his tone.
“I should’ve deleted those. I’m sorry. That’s embarrassing.” You said, avoiding eye contact as you tossed your shoes to the side.
“Who’d you send those to?” He asked, his eyes never leaving you.
“No one.” You admitted, fiddling with the end of your skirt.
“Most people don’t take nudes for ‘no one.’” He said, walking over to you so he stood in front of you.
“Well, I did. No one got those photos.” You said, shrugging slightly as you watch your hands playing with the hem of your skirt.
“Why would you take them then?”
“Just to feel better about myself.” You shrugged again, feeling awkward about the whole encounter.
He raised your head up to meet his eyes with a finger under your chin, leaning down to get closer to your face. “So no one else got to see your little nudes you took? Just me?”
“Yeah. Just you.” You nodded, staring him in the eyes, still blushing incredibly hard.
“You know, you're so pretty.” His tone became soft, his eyes wandering along your body for a moment before he decided to lean down further and kiss you.
Your tipsy mind took a few seconds to respond before kissing him back. He pushed you to lay down on the bed, nudging himself between your legs.
He made quick work of your clothes, he had seen you naked already, now he wanted to feel you. He leaned back once he got you naked, admiring you. His hands wandered along your body, feeling your thighs, your stomach, your breasts, your arms.
“You're fucking beautiful. You don't know how mad I got thinking you sent those pictures to someone else.” He admitted. “I've wanted you all to myself for a while now.”
“This seems a little unfair right now.” You squirmed under his touch. “You getting to see me naked but I haven't seen you naked.”
“So impatient.” He tsked before slipping his fingers inside you. “Fuck, you're soaked.”
“Matty, please!” You grabbed onto his wrist.
“Let me take my time with you.” He grabbed your hand and held it down to your side with his free hand.
You moaned, squeezing your legs around his sides as they tried closing on his hand.
“I've been thinking about getting you like this for so long. Thinking about touching you like this. Thinking about how you feel.” He kneeled down between your legs. “How you taste.” He said before licking your pussy. He let go of your hand, wrapping his arm around your thigh to keep them opened, your hands moving to tangle in his hair.
“Fuck, Matty, so good.” You moaned, watching him as he ate your sweet cunt. His eyes were locked on your face, wanting to see every reaction he could pull from you.
He just wanted to hear all your pretty sounds, feel you tug his hair, have you cum on his face. His finger and mouth kept their assault on you, making your legs shake around his head, making you try bucking into his face, making you moan and cry, until he finally made you cum as you cried out his name. He groaned as you pulled on his hair, helping you ride out your orgasm.
“You're fucking perfect when you cum, baby.” He said as he stood up, now stripping down himself. “You gonna give me one more, yeah?” He asked as he settled back between your thighs, sliding his dick through your folds, nudging at your clit.
“Yeah.” You nodded, biting your lip as you watched his cock.
“Good girl. You just lay there and look pretty.” He eased his tip into you, hearing your moan as he began to stretch you out. He slowly pushed in, wanting you to feel every inch as he did. “You're so fucking tight, princess. Feels so fucking good.”
“Fuck, so big.” You whined, hands gripping at the sheets.
“It's gonna feel so good, baby. Gonna mold you to my cock so no one else feels as good as me.” He said before he started rocking his hips. You both moaned as he leaned down over you, his hands roaming over your skin again, landing on your breasts. He massaged them with his hands, pulling one away after a moment to attach his lips to your nipple.
“Fuck, that feels good, Matty.” You moaned, back arching into his mouth.
He started thrusting faster, harder, wanting to make you feel good, wanting to bury his  cock deeper in you. “You have no idea what you do to me, angel. I need you to cum on my cock. Need to feel you squeezing my dick.”
Your hands moved to hold onto his arms, feeling the muscles as he held himself over you. You were moaning and whimpering, eyes rolling back from the pleasure.
“That's it. Who's making you feel this good? Who's dick is in you right now?” He asked, hips relentlessly driving into yours.
“You! Your dick! Fuck, Matty!” You cried out, feeling your orgasm about to hit.
“That's right, princess. Mine. Cum on my cock.”
Your orgasm hit you hard and your body shook as you cried out his name along with some profanity. He helped ride out your orgasm before pulling out and cumming on your stomach.
“You're mine now.” He said softly before kissing you.
Taglist:
@jeannie-beannie @yourenogoodforme @mixvchelle @helendeath @ireallyneed-somesleep @soaked4abby @hpnsfwaddict
Let me know if you wanna be added!
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bunnys-kisses · 4 months ago
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Hey bunny love , i heard some great things about your bakery so i decided to come and try too , i would like a butter tart with a milkshake please oh and make it nice and sweet with lando norris (💗)
barkey menu!
if you want your own order! check out the original post and i can bake somethin' up for ya! thank you for those lovely request!! did you know that butter tarts are actually from the region of canada i'm from!
additional message from sender: Hey bunny love HELP you see the order that i’ve done i forgot to clarify that i need it in a best friend inexperienced reader x lando , SORRY AGAIN (💗)
butter tart ("let's ruin ourselves for anyone else.") + milkshake (size kink) served by lando norris (formula one)!!
cw: smut/pwp, inexperienced!reader, size difference/kink, friends-to-lovers, missionary, romantic/mushy, gentle sex, marriage pact
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you and lando had a deal. by the time you hit twenty-five you two would get married. the two of you had been lifelong friends and at the time thought that no one would actually want to date you two.
so the pact was made.
you had honestly forgotten about it years later. it was a pact you made when you were both dumb teenagers and lando's career as a racer hadn't taken off. by this point you had expected him to find some super hot model to date. not the best friend he's had for years!
until after you twenty-fifth birthday you received a text message.
it simply said, "will be home in a few days, where did you want to have our first date?" and before you could question him about what the hell he was talking about. you remembered his boyish smile when you linked pinkies with him.
lando was beyond relieved to see you. you picked him up from the airport and drove him back to your flat. you had laughed as you merged onto the highway.
"so a date, huh?"
"well, yeah. i mean i wasn't going to show up with a ring!" he laughed, "did you forget or something?" he almost seemed a little hurt.
"no, no." you said, "i just thought you would've found someone else by now! i mean you're surrounded by pretty girls all day."
he shrugged, "yeah, yeah. but none of them are you. i was honestly worried that you would've found someone too! i mean i can't date you if you're already with someone." he laughed once more.
being on a date with him was like hanging out with him in your youth. expect every time he wanted to kiss you, he asked. and when he kissed you. you felt a spark in your gut.
you were just at a local pub you had always gone to. there was no need for fancy first dates. eventually lando had his arm around you while you sat in the booth and the two of you watched the football game.
when you were teens you were especially into it. but over time he made you cheer for the team he cheered for. in exchange you forced him to like your favourite cheesy movie. (which he would admit now, wasn't that terrible!).
"I want to keep kissing you." he said honestly in your ear.
you picked up a fry and fed it to him. when he swallowed it, you turned to kiss him on the lips, "you don't have to ask me, norris. i've seen every mole on your ass."
he laughed and leaned in for another kiss. but before he did, he said, "i want to be a gentleman."
that sentiment lasted all the way to the bedroom. you had wished you had tidied up a little bit more of your bedroom, but you might have just been over thinking everything as you took off your t-shirt.
"lando... please be gentle, it's been like a million years since i last had sex." you admitted as you played with the t-shirt between your fingers nervously.
he looked at you with a curious glance, "who was the last person you slept with? when did this happen?" there was a small curl of jealousy in his gut.
you replied, "i mean like, not since the one, one-night stand i had in my first year of uni... since then it's been a dry spell."
he nodded, he understood. but part of him really wanted to be your first time. but hey, he had an entire lifetime to make up for it! he noticed how you gazed at him when he took his shirt off. "like what you see?"
you chuckled, "yes. you've always been handsome, lando. too handsome for me!"
he shook his head and took off his belt, "no. just handsome enough for you." then pulled down his shorts before he got into bed with you, pulling you down onto the floral printed covers next to him.
he looked nice in just a pair of black briefs. you couldn't believe this was really happening. to have your legs tangled up in his, his lips on yours. hands roaming each other's bodies.
it was something that would've made sixteen year old you blush.
"wait, wait.' he said, "give me a second." then got out of bed, he left the bedroom to go to the living room where all of his belongings still there. he came back with the shiny foil of a condom. he beamed at you, "have to play it safe." before he climbed back into bed with you.
he loved the sight of you. you were so pretty, ever since you two were younger. he always thought you were the prettiest girl at school, even if you didn't believe it. now, he'd just have to tell you every day how pretty you were.
he got his briefs off and the condom on before he put you on your back and got between your legs. he knelt between them with his cock at full attention. he admired the sight of you.
"i can't believe you kept true to your word." you chuckled and rubbed your face as if to wipe the blush off.
he smiled at you, "why wouldn't i? i made a promise." he leaned in towards you and kissed you on the cheek, "i was practically counting down the days. it was hard to keep it all inside, not when i was constantly thinking about you."
"i hate that i'm inexperienced."
"don't care. i have a whole life time to show learn everything with you." his voice was tinged with romance and you felt what you could only describe as love bloom in your chest.
you always had feelings for him, and see them returned made you only feel hot in the face. he kissed at those same cheeks and palmed your breasts.
"someone's into those." you chuckled.
"i always thought they were so pretty." he said almost breathless, "in those stupid dresses you wore in university. remember when i threw my hoodie over you, it was because i didn't want anyone else looking at you."
you remembered them, you were trying something new at the time. and those dresses really made you breasts noticeable. you chuckled, "god, i remember that. or that time you took off your rain jacket and zipped it up to my chin."
"i just thought you were so painfully pretty." he took his cock and rubbed it up against your wet pussy. he used to have dreams about it. he always wanted to sink himself into you and just fuck your sweet cunt.
you held onto the covers under you as you tensed for a moment in anticipation for lando's cock. you held you breath as he slowly sank in. you let out a sharp noise and lando eased your mind with kisses on your lips.
"that's it." he praised with sweetness on his tongue. he thought you looked so beautiful under him, like you always belonged there, "are you okay?" he asked.
you nodded, "yeah, i'm doing great. just... not used to it." you took a deep breath.
lando held onto you and said softly, "don't worry, i'll go gentle. don't want to hurt my wife on the first try."
you looked at him and chuckled, "and what if i'm not marriage material in a year?"
lando shook his head, "i don't wanna hear it." then sealed it with a kiss as he used your hips to rub your against his cock. the movements were small, but slowly building up in a decent peace. he wanted to make sure that he didn't hurt you.
you held his face and continued to kiss him. when he eventually pulled away, you were both soon panting. he rutted up into you and moved your hips at a similar pace. he loved that your expression was starting to change to one filled with pleasure.
he thought you were beautiful even then.
"i've thought about this for years. i always wondered what you'd look like under me, or on top, or anywhere really. i just dreamt about having you."
"you could've asked me out sooner, norris." you smiled at him. you felt a swell in your chest.
lando blushed a little and replied, "i couldn't find the words. but then when i remembered, i knew i had to jump at the chance to have you."
you wrapped your arms and legs around him and said, "well mister lando norris, you have me. now and forever."
he broke out into a grin, it was so cheesy. even though he had his cock inside of you. but he loved it. he loved you. he kissed you again before he started to thrust a little heavier.
the intimacy between you two was strong, but the actually movements were softer. lando's lips felt so nice against your neck and along your jaw. every kiss felt like worship.
his hands explored your sides, almost making you giggle loudly. you could hear your heartbeat in your ears from the pleasure in your veins.
the bed creaked under your movements. you felt the lust warm in your gut. you clutched onto his shoulders as he kept his steady pace. you panted heavily, "i'm close, fuck, lando. i'm close!"
"i know, i know. me too." he groaned as he moved. he was so big compared to you. and you felt so small, but in a good way. he was just perfect for you and you were for him.
you always felt protected by him.
you two kissed once more and you moaned into the kiss. he was panting through his nose as he pressed his cock into you as deep as it would go.
you tensed up around him and his cock twitched inside of you. and together you both came, pressed against on another as orgasm gripped you.
it felt so good.
you could get used to this. the movements slowed to a stop and you broke the kiss to catch your breath. you panted heavily as you tried to pull yourself together.
"so good." he laid on top of you for a moment, embracing your warmth below him. you wrapped your arms around him tightly and kissed his sweaty temple.
you both laid there. it felt nice. maybe you wouldn't mind keeping to the marriage pact you made when you were a teen. it wouldn't be bad to be married to your best friend.
he yawned before he moved off of you, "i gotta get you a nice ring. something as beautiful as you."
-
you didn't get married at twenty-five. it would take about three years before you had your special day.
his fingers interlocked with yours and he held them up towards the stream of morning light through the window. "you know." he said, "i used to write your name with my last name when we were kids."
you chuckled and looked to him, "the crush was that big."
he nodded, "yeah, i mean, you ruined all other girls for me. but i'm glad. let's ruin ourselves for anyone else anyway." he laughed before he threw an arm around you and kissed you deeply.
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allllium · 3 days ago
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Just an Accident
~ Jason todd x reader who was accidentally hurt
~ Fluff, Jason being dramatic, WC:
~ Inspired by @mostly-imagines
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[Thank you guys for being so patient while I finished this and thank you for all likes 💓💓 I really wasn't expecting anything till this was finished. Hope this meets your expectations <3]
Jason tried really hard to keep his secret secret from you but let's be honest, he's very obvious about it. Especially once you meet his family.
After he finally came clean to you about everything, he became even more protective. More protective than you ever thought possible.
He would freak out anytime he didn't know where you were or if you got hurt in any way.
"I'm so so sorry." Bruce says, following you through the mansion repeating his apology.
"It's okay, Bruce, it was an accident." You reply, "I should've known."
Honestly there was no way you could've known that Bruce was creating some elaborate booby trap on the kitchen counter that would fail and smack you in the face when you walked into the kitchen.
It didn't hurt too bad, luckily Bruce was testing things with plastic and not the real materials.
From the look of it though, you'll definitely have a mark on your nose and possibly a bruise under your eye.
"I had no idea it was gonna do that." He continues defending, knowing how Jason will react.
"It's fine, I swear. I know you wouldn't do that on purpose." You walk into the living room and sit down on the couch. Bruce sits next to you.
"Can I get you anything?" He asks. Obviously freaking out.
"No, it's alright. It really doesn't hurt."
"Oh shit." You hear Dick gasp. Coming in through the front door with Tim.
"Oh, what did you do!?" Tim asks, "Jason is gonna kill you."
"It was an accident, everything is fine." You try to calm everyone down.
Seeing that you're okay, Dick can't hold back his laugh.
"Wow, Jason is never gonna trust you again Bruce." Tim hits Dick on the arm and rolls his eyes. To the side of you, Bruce leans forward to hold his head in his hands.
"I think you guys are being a little dramatic. Jason isn't gonna kill him."
"No you seriously underestimate how Jason will react to this." Tim tells you.
"Yeah, remember he almost killed me for making jokes about you when you first got together."
"What?" You turn to Dick in confusion, "I don't remember that."
"Not important," he waves it off, "The point is, we need a plan."
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"A plan for what?"
"A plan to hide this from Jason" He tells you, in a tone that screams obvious.
"How would I do that, Dick? I live with him."
"I don't know yet, that's why we need a plan!" He exclaims, pacing in front of the couch.
You roll your eyes, "You're being dramatic."
"No he's not." Bruce says. You fall back into the couch and cross your arms over chest.
"Bruce please. I need at least one of other person here to be an adult."
You can hear Tim laughing as he sits in the chair next to the couch.
"Well, he's right. Jason's gonna be pissed." Bruce shakes his head at you. He stands from the couch and starts pacing with Dick.
"They're gonna make me lose my mind." You mumble under your breath. You run your hands over your face, this childish behavior you're watching isn't what you were expecting from Batman and Nightwing.
Okay to be honest you were definitely expecting this from Dick.
Tim leans over to whisper to you, "You should make a break for it, they're too busy plotting to notice you leave."
"Let me guess," you whisper back, "you've had to make a break for it a couple times?"
"More than you know." He shakes him head and has a serious look on his face.
"Well, have fun with that." You laugh and walk out the front door. Tim was right, both the guys were so busy trying to figure out how to hide you from Jason, they totally forgot to hide you.
You rush home to meet Jason. You were supposed to meet for dinner but obviously you got a little distracted.
"Hey baby." You sigh when you walk through the door. Jason is in the kitchen cooking dinner. Whatever he chose to make, made the whole room smell amazing.
"Hey. What took you so long?"
"I stopped by the mansion to borrow that thing from Alfred but he wasn't there." You tell him, referencing some cooking tool you wanted to make desert for after dinner.
"Where did he go?" You want into the kitchen to see him while you talk.
"I have no idea. I got distracted by something Bruce was doing." You walk over and take a piece of food that he's cutting.
Without looking, he softly smacks your hand away.
"Rude." You laugh.
"This is my sacred space." He puts the knife down and gestures over the whole counter.
"You're ridiculous." You laugh again and kiss him on the cheek.
"How dare you." He puts his hand on his chest in fake offense. Only then does he turn to actually look at you. "What happened?" He immediately asks.
"Oh it's fine, just got smacked with some plastic " Which is apparently not the answer he wanted.
"What the fuck does that mean?" He grabs your face gently and examines the marks on your face.
"It means I got hit with some plastic. But it doesn't hurt." You quickly explain, but he doesn't let go of your face or stop freaking out.
"What plastic?"
"Bruce was experimenting with something and it didn't work."
"He did this?" He lets go off your face to run his hands over his own.
"It was accident. He wouldn't hurt me on purpose and you know that."
"I don't care if it was an accident, you're hurt."
"Jason." You say firmly. He's obviously surprised considering you never use his name to address him. "An accident is an accident and you're not gonna hold this against Bruce. He already apologized and clearly felt bad."
"But you're hurt" He pouts.
You step forward and wrap your arms over his shoulders. "It doesn't hurt. It was just some plastic."
"It left a mark."
"I promise I'm okay. And I want you to promise you won't hurt Bruce for this." You look right into his eyes and do your best to give him a puppy dog look. Which isn't necessary because he can't say no to you anyway.
"Fine I promise I won't hurt him." He presses his forehead to yours, "I'd rather leave him to stew in fear anyway."
You chuckle at his words. "As long as no real harm comes to him I won't stop you from having fun."
"Good." He kisses you once and heads back to make dinner. You have no doubt Jason would ever actually hurt Bruce over something so small but you'd rather be safe than sorry.
Hopefully this'll stop Dick and Bruce acting like absolutely children in the future.
Yeah that'll never happen.
Not even 10 minutes after finishing dinner you get a call from Dick.
"How dare you?" He asks the moment you answer the phone. "You're a traitor."
"Again with the dramatics Dick. You can't stop me from going home."
"Let me guess Jason's on his way here to get some revenge right now." He says in a very childish and fearful tone.
"No! I was right, you guys are way more dramatic than you should be and he has no intention of killing anyone." Jason looks at you as you talk to his brother. Clearly wondering what he has to do with this situation.
"I don't believe you. You've shown where your loyalty lies."
"Why are you talking like I'm an enemy or something?"
"Maybe you are! How should I know?"
"Okay you're right." You decide to play along, "I couldn't stop him from wanting to kill Bruce, he's on his way there right now."
Jason furrows his eyebrows in confusion.
"I knew it! Mark my words one day-"
His voice cuts off when you hang up.
"There is something severely wrong with your entire family." You tell Jason with a blank face.
"Yeah I know." He puts his arm over your shoulder and pulls you into him.
Hmm you wonder how long it takes till Dick realizes you lied.
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1pepsiboy · 6 months ago
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Car video with Matt Sturniolo - Fluff! (request)
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Matt Sturniolo x reader!
Word count: 1.1K
Warnings: swearing, a little kissing
A/N: This one got away from me and I had to reign it back in because it's not supposed to be smutty lmaooo But here it is!
***
It’s close to midnight as Matt parks the van in a random spot at the favorite lot. The two of you got fries, chicken nuggets with sweet n’ sour sauce (mostly for him), and a large milkshake to share. You plan to do a car video to post on his individual channel.
You have no idea what you were going to talk about. Matt had fans submit their own questions for you two to answer.
After setting up the camera, which included Matt going out to check it, you start recording and picking at the food.
Matt starts the video off. "Hey everyone, (y/n) and I are here. Uhm... basically we're going to do our own car video without Nick and Chris. We don't really have a topic, but you guys submitted questions on instagram. Babe, have anything to start us off?"
Now, he looks at you as you’re mid fry. You chew quickly as possible, wiping your hands on a napkin, as he giggles under his breath.
"Thanks for the warning," you remark with a laugh. "Uhm, not really... I'm just here for the vibes."
"For the vibes?" Matt crooks a brow and looks you up and down. Then he takes a nugget and dips in the sauce.
You roll your eyes. "Don't yuck my yum."
Matt stuffs the nugget in his mouth. "Okay, Chris."
All you do is flip him off and take a sip of the milkshake.
"Just ask the questions."
"Okay, okay." He laughs as he readjusts in his seat after grabbing his phone. It's quiet for a couple minutes while he gathers them. "Oh, let's start with this one. What's our favorite thing about each other?"
"Well-"
"Oh, quick disclaimer, sorry babe." Matt shoots you a nervous smile. "I will edit screenshots of the questions onto the screen so you can see who they're from. And uh.. if you'd like to get featured in videos, follow us on instagram to see the next time I ask for questions. I'll put the @s on the screen and in the description below."
You slowly chew on your straw after taking another sip, patiently waiting for him to be done. It's already been fifteen minutes and you are almost positive Matt forgot the extra battery pack. Granted, you could've asked Nick where it was and brought it; too late.
"Okay, what were you going to say?" Matt prompts.
You think about making another snarky remark in how it'd been so long since he asked the question that you don't remember it.
Tapping the straw on your pursed lips, you pretend to think. "Well... I have many favorite things so it's an unfair question."
Matt lightly rolls his eyes. "Look, I know you love everything about me, but what's your favorite?"
"Oh, everything?" You laugh. "You think so highly of yourself, don't you, Matty B? Let's go the different route then." You look directly into the camera. "Guys, this kid will not accept anything sort of unorganized or clean. Not for more than five minutes if he can help it."
Matt's jaw drops and he snatches the cup out of your hand. "Your least favorite thing is how organized I am?"
"Yeah, live a little! You won't die if there's like a wrapper or two on your desk, or if the toothbrush isn't in the holder."
"You are an absolute monster, (y/n)!" Matt cracks. He points between you and the camera. "Don't believe a single word she says. She leaves more than a wrapper or two, and her skincare is all over my bathroom counter after she does her morning routine."
You shrug. "I don't see a problem with that, and I don't think the fans will either."
"Guys, leave a comment if you're more like me or (y/n)." He barely scoffs under his breath, eating another fry. "You're lucky you have other amazing qualities that I overlook the messiness."
Now, you couldn't help blushing. “Such as?”
Matt shakes his head, a smile spreading on his lips. “You’re understanding about a lot going on, you know, like the channels, life, and stuff. So it’s easy to talk to you about it, like if I’m ever anxious or something.”
“Top fucking notch quality right there,” you say. “Anything else? I love the praise.”
“I thought this was reserved for in private, babe.”
Your eyes go wide and you almost spit out the fry you just put in your mouth. “Matthew! Stop!”
Matt giggles under his breath. “Sorry. Uhm… You can rock a men’s polo and make the best playlists for me… Obviously you have such a vibrant personality.” 
“That I do.” You nod in agreement. You reach out to brush back some of his hair, causing some pinkness to rouge on his cheeks. “I love how cautious you are about decisions, keeps me from letting impulsive thoughts win.”
“Which is a lot,” he shoots a look at the camera.
You can only roll your eyes in response. “Anyway… You’re the most caring person I know that will drop anything to help someone you love. The only time you won’t ask a lot of questions… Oh! You’re actually the best big spoon ever.”
He bites his bottom lip, failing to hold back a cheesy grin. “Really, babe?”
“Absolutely.” 
You close the space between you, and Matt instinctively rests his hand in the crook of your neck. You crawl over the center console onto his lap when you realize it wouldn’t be just a few kisses.
Time gets away and you sort of forget that you are filming. Your hands roam each other’s bodies over and under clothes. Both of you leave butterfly kisses on the other’s neck.
The lights in the van suddenly dim away.
“Shit. Fuck,” Matt says, his lips pink from yours and hair tousled more than usual. “I think the camera died.”
“And we technically only answered one question.” You bite your lip with a laugh. 
He laughs with you, running a hand through his hair. He lays back and looks you in the eyes. “I should’ve known not to start with that question.”
“Should we try doing this again on a different night?”
Matt sighs heavily. “Probably… It would suck to scrap all the footage though.”
A smirk rises on your lips as you move back to the passenger seat. “You want to include clips of us making out?”
“Obviously no.” He rolls his eyes. 
“Let’s just keep going then. Use my phone to record.”
Matt kisses the crook of your neck. “You’re the best, babe.”
You shoot him a look. “Be careful, Matthew.”
“Sorry, sorry.” He throws his hands up in defense. (He really wasn’t that sorry.)
*You can request others from this list or send me new ones!*
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barblaz-arts · 5 months ago
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I've come back to drop some Next Gen Nevermore lore, this time about Sora and Regine's parents 💕
Yukiko Toriyama
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Because of my love for parallels, she's a doctor to match the adult characters in the show (Principal - Weems/Bianca; Sheriff - Galpin/Walker). She's a surgeon though, not a therapist like Kinbott, but still a doctor!
Yukiko's around Wednesday and co's age, so she was also in Jericho High when they were in Nevermore. She has a huge respect for Outcasts, thinking that they are very cool. In fact, she thought this one siren girl that she first saw during Outreach Day was especially cool. Soon she will find out that her name is Bianca Barclay and that her classmate Lucas Walker will end up dating her.
She met Sora's father some time after graduating from high school. She fell for his confidence, and was especially impressed that he was an Outcast. Unfortunately she realized too late that he's all talk. When she got pregnant with Sora, his rich parents essentially sent her hush money, which she accepted and used to pay for med school. Sora's grandparents helped raise her while Yukiko finished her studies, so she wasn't as present as she probably should have been during Sora's childhood. She tries her best though, really.
Hugo Schuyler
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Sora's father. He came from a rich and reputable family of psychics that specialize in spirits, also known as Herons. Because of his family's reputation, he developed a huge ego and has delusions of grandeur.
He's a glutton for attention, a trait that Sora unfortunately inherited as she also always makes an effort to fit in with "the popular crowd" among her peers. However unlike Sora who is ashamed of her outcast status and prefers to hide her power, Hugo has a superiority complex and overcompensates for his weak psychic abilities by being obnoxiously loud about his outcast status and his family's name.
He ends up starting a YouTube channel as a paranormal investigator after Nevermore. When he finds out he has a daughter, he's quick to head over to Nevermore and rope Sora into his paranormal shenanigans. No, it doesn't end up being a cute father-daughter bonding activity.
He sees both Wednesday and Enid as rivals. Wednesday for her formidable psychic powers (and reputation!), Enid for, well, her more successful YouTube channel(which isn't even hers, it's the Wolf Preserve's). Wednesday does not remember him from their high school days though, and Enid purposely mixes him up with Xavier when addressing him.
Vega hates him because he thinks aliens don't exist.
Erica Gutierrez
(I don't have her design and personality fully conceptualized yet, sorry)
Erica is Eugene's ex-wife and is a famous actress who started out when she was a teenager. She used to be a celebrity crush of Eugene's when he was in Nevermore, and dating and marrying her was a dream come true that sadly didn't last.
Erica makes an effort to see Regine when she can, and she usually has her daughter stay with her throughout the summer. Her fame comes with its own cons, particularly the excessive attention she(and by extension her family) gets hugely contributing to Regine's overly reclusive personality.
Erica had nothing to do with Outcasts before meeting Eugene and is every bit of a Normie. She and Wednesday never liked each other. She gets along well with Enid because she thinks Enid is normal enough when she isn't wolfed out. Enid likes her for getting her Michelle Yeoh's autograph and a video message as a birthday gift once. (Wednesday hates that Eugene's ex wife of all people showed her up that year)
None of the Nevermore student knew Regine's mother was a celebrity until Erica decided to give her daughter a surprise visit during Family Day(coincidentally the same day Hugo goes to meet Sora. It was a long weekend for the girls)
(masterpost for my AUs here)
EDIT: I ALMOST FORGOT!
Partial credit to @whitebeltwriter for coming up with Yukiko's background with me. I no longer remember which parts were my idea and which is hers, but pls know that it was a collaborative effort
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annaesterella · 5 months ago
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Since almost every good fan of Yan-Batfam or something like that is getting into this (and I'm a fan of that kind of thing) LET'S HAVE A NEGLECTED READER
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀. ☆
But I saw that a lot of people liked the other fic, seriously people, KISSES DIRECTLY FROM ANNA! SERIOUSLY, I FELT LIKE A Celebrity (<⁠(⁠ ̄⁠︶⁠ ̄⁠)⁠> ehehe) And this was the first time that a fic of mine gained so many views and I'm very excited, thank you to everyone who liked it!
F/reader (sorry guys, I don't know how to write M/reader)
I'll write a part II, bcuz is too long!
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“Don't be silly! I would never be a Wayne.”
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Well, first things first, when did it all started again? Haha not 500 time loops ago, but some years ago.. like the first child, you were from a circus, the difference is that.. well? Your parents were magicians, at least your mother... your father until you were 6 or 7 years old was just another distant memory but sweet, not yours, but your mother's... the incredible magic of the circus “Joie nocturne” a beautiful woman, yet another victim of the charms of the heartthrob, philanthropist, billionaire and owner of Wayne companies, Bruce Wayne. Of course, your mother, like almost all women, never forgot him, having him as her beautiful memory, after all, he gave her everything she needed.. you, her lil bunny! That's what she called you, before she was gone, like him, she turned into your distant but sweet memory, like a magic spell..
You felt so alone, the circus wanted to keep you, after all, you were their family too, but even so, he found out about you, and being a child, You wanted to meet your father. Still, feeling the pain of abandoning what you knew, you went. You had your 10 minutes of affection and then never saw him again. You met your two brothers, half brothers, Dick and Jason, and the buttler, Alfred, You thought your life would be like a funny family sitcom, HAHA, WHAT A JOKE. Of course, the oldest was excited to meet you, you were just like him, from a circus! The youngest was curious about the situation, yet he was kind to you and didn't mistreat you. The oldest gentleman, Even with little time, he treated you like your grandfather treated you, you then created an innocent affection for him, after all, he reminded you of your grandfather! After 1 or 2 weeks, they disappeared. Only you and "grandpa" are left.. Just like your mother, you developed an affection for magic... but just those stupid tricks left you bored... even so, it was affectionate to see Alfred pretending not to know about the tricks, just to see you smiling... soon you realized.. you weren't really a Wayne.. at most a visitor. They didn't have time for you, Alfred was still a buttler at the end of the day.
Time passed and you felt more and more alone, of course, you had Alfred, but... he didn't always have time for you. Soon more people appeared... and others disappeared... Jason was the first to go, and even with the short time, you suffered, he was kind... your brother for such a short time, you wished you had played with him more, and after that the house, which was already abandoned, became even emptier, soon another boy appeared, Tim, from a rich family.. and soon Dick went to another city.. you don't remember when, but now there was also Cassandra, Damian, Duke.. Steph.. you remember Barbara from a long time.. Even though the house was full, it was still empty... and you could only comfort yourself with the magic and the things your mother had left for you. Your little stuffed rabbit and its "magic" materials. Even though If you were his biological daughter too, Damian seemed to have more of Wayne than you,maybe because he was a vigilante, maybe because he was a boy? did not you know of course... so why bother? Soon, you stopped trying, you didn't want that anymore... crawling for affection? At your eighteen You made your choice. You wouldn't be a Wayne, you'd be a joie nocturne again. But would they let you? That night, you went to visit the circus, that was your favorite time of year... Halloween, and circus mixed together? Wonderful! So you saw that... the villainy... and for a split second, you wanted to.. do something.. Playing like a good girl, you approached the large bearded man and tugged on his sleeve, asking what that was all about. Maybe this was your chance to be something. It was funny at first, seeing their despair, your second family, trying to explain themselves, but you soon gave a smile, before stamping your foot on the floor, making a crowbar appear, helping to open it. That was the beginning of everything... you were finally someone... even if on the wrong side. Soon, the decisive moment arrived, when you returned "home", packed your bags, and like a magic spell, you disappeared, leaving only a white rabbit and everything you did in that house, in your room, every magic award, every cheap magic materials.
After a Patrol day, Dick he noticed something unusual in the mansion, perhaps because Alfred was visiting his homeland, but it couldn't be that, after all, Alfred had already done that before... Oh right! Birthday girl, his ittle bunny sister. He ran upstairs, knocking on the bedroom door, before entering and seeing only a stuffed rabbit on the bed, and the various magical things around the room, if not for the empty drawers and things, he would say you still lived there by the decoration and the fact room looks good, everything is well maintained, warm
Dick: Bunny?
He called, looking around the room, before looking around, seeing the various magic prizes, photos, top hats and magic kits. All given by Alfred or someone called "Mr. Joie nocturne" Could he be a friend of yours? What do you mean you had participated in so many contests and won? Why didn't you call? Or did you call? Where were you now? Why was everything empty? You went away. He started walking in circles, until Tim entered the room.
Tim: You will make a hole in the ground. I called you several times, why are you in this room exactly?
Dick: Y/N, she is gone.. and we didn't even notice or whatever, we didn't receive any notification, why didn't she notify us that she was moving, we... damn... we weren't going to help probably because we were on patrol, did we waver? Did she know we were on patrol? Does she know the truth?
Tim: Wait, too much to process.. what does it mean "She is gone" she left? Is that it?
Dick: Yes. Dumbass
And well, we can say after that, what happened was like "Oh shit" and then everyone was like "OH SHIT" while you were home.. happy! Getting ready for her first show, her first real show... too true. You thought as you put on your gloves and applied your lipstick. Then, with slow steps, you walked onto the stage, smiling, while waving to everyone, who murmured and whistled. So you decided to do your first trick for the night, the "bullet trick" The difference? There was no trick behind it, just you and your skills... after all, it was in your blood. Just as the bullet was about to go through your skull, you snapped your fingers, and then the bullet turned into a beautiful, bright purple butterfly, flying through the circus, soon coming back towards you and turning into your bow tie. Okay, a bit of a show on your part for the first trick, but you have to show that you have morals. Funny that meanwhile, his family was desperate, going so far as to call Alfred, who was now just as desperate. Then, the special time came, the circus then closed the lights and when it opened, all the valuable belongings, inside the boxes, Of course, you had to feign shock, some clowns trying to calm the audience, and of course, you were also feigning surprise, making your things "disappear" to join in the fun. You looked at the children, snorting slightly, as you made the toys re-appear, seeing some calm down, while the others widened their eyes in surprise. Soon, the "incredible" Bat-family appeared... seriously, for such an idiotic cause they came...? Soon you saw them walking towards you and everything fell into place.
Nightwing: — Y/N! I mean.. Young Lady.. we were notified of your disappearance, we will ask you to return home.
You frowned, as you looked at the audience. Hearing their screams increase, some of relief that the "Bat-family" was there, others of confusion at the situation.
: — I believe, I'm already eighteen, so there's nothing to worry about, Still, I'm with my family at the moment, so I don't understand why the complaint. Not to mention that we were robbed at that moment, so why specifically did they come to resolve a case like this?
You questioned calmly, while pointing at the audience, smiling, before rushing to disappear with your family, leaving the problem to the bats, after all, they were the "professionals." You could say that the shock was written on their faces.. you were so big, poorly dressed.. those presentation clothes didn't suit a little girl like you.. but still.. what you meant by "your family" Were you referring to those circus freaks? They weren't as good as they were, they were just.. ordinary people! Well.. now they had to solve the problem of theft... but that couldn't end like that, nope.
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cryptfile · 3 months ago
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᪇ꫭ dreamseeker, [ qimir x jedi!reader ]
summary — it all started when you find out he’s alive.
warnings — pure angst, violence, blood, mentions of injuries and tons of tension, sfw.
side notes — 4k+ // English's not my first language so please be kind! went slightly away with this one so would catalogue it as an alternative universe. Heard liking without reblogging makes you fall in an awful curse that breaks my heart in the process so let that sink in, anyway everything it's appreciated!,,, thought about making an +18 second part? dunno,,, thks also for the 110 followers! love you guys sooooo much *heart avalanche*
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The air's hot in the room when you woke up.
The sweat made the sheets stick to you body as you got out of bed for the third time that week, a terrible headache forming as you leave the dormitories in the middle of the dark. Coruscant suddenly feels unbearable. You've slept almost nothing through the course of the week, so you surely are in a bad mood when the cold wind of the night makes you shiver at the sudden change of temperature.
I'm searching for you. Even in my dreams.
The words are repeating in the back of you head, scratching a part of your brain while you keep on trying to remember who's voice you're dreaming so much lately.
It's all connected somehow, always is. You've learned to trust the force a while ago, learned that destiny's intertwined with an energy field that holds the galaxy together the hard way, so you know, deep down, that you have to trust your guts in this one, something that you know it concerns you but can't quite understand what really is in the first place.
Dreams. Dreams are a cruel thing that you tend to forgot sometimes, the reflection of the mind and soul projected like a high-class transmission in your head. Dreams talk, and they make you think about things you've let in the past, things you've certainly need to come back at some point.
That's why you can't sleep later, cause you know it means something. You know that dreaming the very same dream every single night for the past week means something more than just mere imagination playing around, far from an innocent scenario.
The temple is silent at night even when the city outside seems to be so wake in contrast of the inside, most of the lights out as you crossed the empty hallway hoping to avoid anyone, cause you know they'll ask questions you don't have an answer for.
In all truth, you don't have a clue why are you up so late, why this deep voice kept you awake when you should be deep in your sleep, dreaming about something more than superstitions. You don't have an answer to any superior, don't seem to have an answer for yourself either.
The Jedi trials ended long ago, yet, you don't think of yourself as someone as successful as Yord Fandar, your talent being far from what it should be expected. You never complain about anything and never would, they were the only family you ever knew and you refuse to lose everything you've been working so hard for just for questioning your bare existence.
"Can't sleep?" The male voice makes you stiff almost immediately, checking your surroundings to notice Master Sol approaching you from the left. The Jedi Master catches you by surprise, your hands already on the lightsaber that is hanging on your waist before you notice you're safe, even when you don't want to talk. "I'm sorry. Didn't mean to scare you."
There are things that are worth hiding, but with Sol? Master Sol seems to see through it all, the worries and the dreams that you don't know if you should call nightmares, even when you try to lock them away for a minute. That's the main reason the man stares at you, cause you expel that smell of desperation, the tension in your muscles as you don't sleep in what seems are ages.
"What's troubling you?" He asks, your own eyes betraying you as they can't hold the weight of his gaze. "I know it's not my place to ask, but are you sleeping well lately?"
"Not really, but nothing to worry about" you say almost afraid that it's going to get you in trouble, the lack of sleep making you think the most stupid things as you stop in the middle of the hallway, making sure there's no one around more than Master Sol and yourself.
Not sleeping is a dangerous thing when reality tends to become a feverish version of itself.
I'm searching for you. Even in my dreams.
You're unsure of telling him what's really going on, unsure of trusting the people you've been close your whole life out of nowhere. A sudden sixth sense that commands you to keep the dreams to yourself, the sound of the male voice you've been listening like the most important secret you've ever hold account of.
It's almost embarrassing to admit you don't trust a Jedi above your rank, that your sixth sense all of sudden makes you keep the truth when it can be something important, when Master Sol has been like a friend to you after all those years of training.
Things have been weird since your Jedi Master was found recently murdered in Ueda, a heavy weight in your shoulders as it saddened you more than you even expected. Master Indara was like close family, and you find yourself missing her, mostly in moments like that when you wish you have someone to talk to
“I was going to the dormitories” Sol explains soon after, walking by your side. “I needed to ask you for a favor my dear friend, and I’m afraid I cannot wait much longer for you to heal.”
Heal. Are you ever allowed to heal? It’s been less than a couple of days since you found out about Indara, let alone the dreams that were tormenting you the rest of the week and suffer the loss, so it seems funny when Master Sol tells you he cannot wait much longer: No Jedi ever has time to heal.
“What can I do to help?”
It’s all it takes to leave Coruscant after, trapped in space in a small ship with not only Master Sol, but Yord and Sol’s younger padawan Jecki Lon, strange enough, also with Verosha Aniseya, a former Jedi you keep an eye on through time passed.
Suddenly you’re traveling through the galaxy and there’s no time for any more tears. Suddenly you need to toughen up and act like this Jedi Knight you’re supposed to be, even when you keep questioning yourself more than ever.
Maybe it’s because of Indara’s death. Her decease came so out of nowhere it shocked you to the very heart — It’s clear that you’re sensitive, dreaming stuff you’ve been getting tired of deciphering, pure nonsense, but then, the ship lands in Khofar and Sol it’s convincing you to stay inside even you’re perfectly capable of taking Verosha’s twin and his alleged master.
It’s your own mind that plays tricks on you, making you believe you’re not good enough to help. Truth is you felt your training as a padawan was not enough, you’re an easy target now that you’re hurt and it seems to make sense when all of sudden the group of Jedis leave you to fucking rot between white walls and buttons that sparkled.
It’s clear you’re affected. How can you not be affected by it? You’re overcome by sadness and anger both mixed together, and that feeling by itself is a dangerous one when in history, makes people question things too much to the point of no return.
So when you find yourself close to the light of the hologram that you turned on being so bored in the ship, your fingers dim between the white and blue rays as you wondered: Is it honorable to seek for revenge? Is it true to a Jedi to feel this gut-wrecking wrath?
You know the answer deep inside. You know it’s wrong, yet your feet think otherwise, cause when you leave the ship in the middle of the night you still debate yourself if you should disobey, if you should do what you want instead, walking through the woods like you know which way to go.
You never disobey any command, so it’s a new thing to openly doubt about the judgement of your superiors, to walk in an unknown planet despite the orders you were told. The path seems to light by itself as you can sense it in the air, the force conducting you in silence as you walked in a fast pace. You know deep down, know everything went wrong.
The blue light of your sable is enough to light the way, the humidity in the air makes you sweat as concentrated in the sounds of the nature, you run, run until your lungs are burning and your heartbeats are so fast you’re afraid the organ itself is going to jump out of your chest. You run even when the long leaves of the plants hit you in the face, when your legs are getting cramps and you can feel the lack of oxygen: The pain is not enough to stop you.
You can hear it from far away, the heat of the fight. The sounds of the physical effort, the buzzing of the lightsables against the silent night. Adrenaline creeps across your blood flow, and even when you can't breathe properly at all you run to the chaos, driven like a moth to the flame. You let the force conduct you as you close your eyes, jumping and elevating from the floor enough to hold the sable from over your head — You attack.
I'm searching for you. Even in my dreams.
It’s coming again, the rough sound of your dreams when your blue sable hits the red out of nowhere, force colliding against each other as the impact is enough to send you directly to the floor. You know who the enemy is, the surprise in Jecki’s face and the disapproval moments after
The stranger is fast and he doesn’t hesitate when he strikes, it’s fast enough to hurt in a mortal way and you became aware of it when Jecki’s falling to the ground and the acid in your mouth is enough to make you look away — The anger comes moments after, the red stains blurring your vision as you let out a scream, gathering the force to dodge his deadly attack.
It’s for Indara, the young padawan, and the Jedi’s he just slayed like they were nothing: It stings in your soul yet you stop holding back, stop holding yourself to finally hit harder, to strike faster than he does, to hurt the stranger as much as he hurted you. And he responds, but not fast enough to beat you, cause you let the metallic back of your sable hit his head when he’s kneeled on the floor, and you smile to yourself cause you have no damn mercy when his helmet finally cracks and it’s enough to break apart revealing his face.
It’s all it takes then. All it takes to froze you in that very spot, holding the sable over your head, ready to end his life with no second thought.
You know that face. You know it when suddenly he’s smiling at you.
I'm searching for you. Even in my dreams.
It makes sense soon after, lowering the sable to the floor without fully believing it, a ghost in front of you as you feel the air leaving your lungs. Drinking the sight of him like he’s not real, like it’s a sick joke your mind made to break you down, to make you weaker.
You’re pulled by a sudden force, by the force. However, falling to the floor hurts way less than seeing him again, the words stuck in your throat unable to speak. It’s imminent, it’s devastating when the pain catches you by surprise, your back aching against the rough surface.
He’s going to kill you, isn’t he?
It makes sense to die by his hand. The memories you two share, the intimacy that was taken away so sudden, it only makes sense to die by the one you loved before, even if it's a surprise you'll never recover from.
The heat of his red lightsaber against your neck is not enough to scare you, but enough to finally look at his face, to encounter his eyes and reveal the truth that was hidden all along between lies. You experience the intensity of his gaze, how it softens when realizing you're looking at him with that same look you have been doing it years ago.
"You're alive" it slips away from you before even noticing, the sound of your voice wrapping him in a haze he didn't expect at first, to be so devastated by you even after all the time resenting the Jedi's and everything they represented "Qimir you're alive..."
He knows you're shocked, the sound of your voice piercing in his ears as he threatened with the weapon against your neck, any sudden movement would slice you in the second — "Hello to you too."
He's real, when he speaks out loud you know he's real, he's standing in front you erasing all the theories you made about not sleeping enough now making you delusional, he's there, standing ready to kill and take what he wants to feel like he won.
It's a personal vendetta, you know it as you expect any answer, any word at all until Sol's screaming as he's taken away from you once again.
He's not a friend, he's not the Qimir you once knew, and he's not someone you can trust again as he was ready to kill. He's not was he used to be, and you can tell by the way he moves, the way he goes against Master Sol hoping to leave the Jedi in the floor, his anger when he refers to his acolyte as a traitor.
He's the one responsible for Indara's death indirectly. He's not a lover. He's not a friend.
You think he died years ago, never really understanding what really happened to the bright man you met in Coruscant, a secret no one dared to bring up. He has the same fucking smile you know too well, the one that make you crumble completely in the sight, and it sadden you, it saddens you he take that path when you seem to woke up from whatever has you nailed to the floor and finally run to help Sol.
You believe you're in the right side, you've been taught about the light and the dark, and you put your heart out filling your mouth saying how you're doing good, how you're making things right.
It's kill or get killed. It’s clear that Qimir does not seem to care about any connection you shared before, hurting you no longer means whatever it meant before, and as the sable burnt your tight, no one cares when you're fainting in the floor, abandoning the fight when it approaches his end.
Sol's mad, but it's not enough to make the master stop to check if you're alive. So many lives were lost in Khofar, and the fight was so demanding you're soon forgot in a planet when the sun is finally rising.
You know you've always been alone, know the last time you saw your family you were too young to even remember, so it's not a surprise when you're left behind. Jedi's come and go, that's why they keep training them generation after generation — It's expected to lose some percentage in missions.
What's not expected, it's when Qimir is close to your cold body later in the early morning. Still deep induced in the fever of pain when he's betrayed by his own heart, his old feelings resurfacing even when he made sure to bury them in a hole in the back of his head.
He's weak it seems. And he should be ashamed of himself when he's the one carrying you back to his ship when everyone has left you behind.
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I'm searching for you. Even in my dreams.
Is that his voice? The rough sound that makes you wake up in a uncomfortable place with clothing you don't remember owning.
You're confused for a second before realizing you're in unknown place, a cold breeze shivering your skin: You're in someone's house, using someone's bed.
It's all it takes to make you stand up, leaving the warm sheets behind as your eyes scan the place looking for both a person or a way out. There's a saucepan in the fire cooking slowly, and a smell you can't describe at first.
You move carefully, theories in your mind about what happened that seemed so imposible. You're sure you're far from Coruscant where you should be, yet, you don't feel much danger when you discover you're left alone in what it seems to be a cave, one that lets a windy current enter through a slit between the rocks.
You're unsupervised: Does that mean you're not a prisoner?
You remember fainting in the cold surface of Khofar, the humidity in the air as the air leaves your lungs before entering a state of unconsciousness. You remember Qimir as a ghost in front of you, smiling like he's young again, trying to get to your room in the middle of the night as if it wasn't forbidden.
Was that your dream about? A warning about the stranger being alive?
You don't dare to drink the water, you don't dare to touch any belonging more than the necessary when inspecting. Its more of a hiding than a home itself, so it lacks of belongings as you can't find anything else more than your clothes, protecting yourself from the cold air.
You're not treated as a prisoner, yet you don't feel any safe at all due to the recent events that seemed to say otherwise. You cannot seem to find your sable, and the silence it's making you lose patience.
The cave is a mess soon after, you're searching for your most important weapon, so now the lack of it seems to make you nervous. You search until you're no longer alone, a new presence in the cave as you adopt a pose of defense.
"Where's my sable?" you ask to what it seems the air, acting all tough before noticing who's the person that dragged you to a different planet, the responsable of healing your wounds with a unexpected speed. You know who it is from before, the change in the cave when he's around even when you don't receive any answer back "I'm talking to you, Qimir."
He doesn't talk when he's tossing it over the things he brought from outside, the orange details in the heavy metal shining against the dim lights of the cave. He knows you are not leaving without it, that you're too attached to it for your bad luck.
"Where am I?" you ask soon enough. At this point you lack of patience out of all, you're tired and your body is sore, you're still dreaming that very same thing, and you're not resting enough to keep your mind sane, so it's not a surprise when you're demanding answers, after all, you wanted to know what happened back in Khofar.
It hits you how much you miss him now that he is in front of you in full silence, not in the middle of violence like before, how much you wanted to hug him until he no longer breathes and spat something stupid as a not-very-funny joke. You miss him after all those years of believing he's death, that he disappeared out of sudden without telling nobody, not even you.
The silence makes you mad, and the stranger knows it, sense it in the force when the anger hits you, filling the air of the cave that feels small even when the spaces are big enough. He lied. That's all you can think of, he lied and never bothered to tell you he's alive after suffering his departing so whole heartedly.
Nights without sleeping as you let the insomnia carry you to a state you can't leave, overflowed by feeling you've learnt to deal with in the pass of time. Time heals it all they say, but it just makes things more bearable, help you live with it.
But now. Now it was cruel, it's a wound that opened by itself with the things you saw, the person he was now, embracing his dark side like it was something worth celebrating.
"Talk to me," you say, and you don't know why you're the one asking for answers when you shouldn't. "This is not fucking fair."
Fair.
"Nothing's ever fair," he says, and the sound of his voice is enough to make you shiver. Now that you're surrounded only by the crashing sound of the waves hitting the rocks outside, you can hear him without the buzz of the fight. "Your people know that very well. You make the rules after all. You decide what's fair in the galaxy."
It's a knife in your heart. You don't want him to affect you like he does, but it's impossible when it stings like a burnt from the sable, the weight of his words, the hatred on his tone when he spits the words like they're acid in his tongue.
"I've never made nothing" it's a declaration of self-hatred at it most, how you've not been capable of doing much even when you pride on being called a Jedi Knight. "You know that."
There's no response. You're used to follow orders, not question, trust you're working with the correct side, so his look is something new, something that leaves goosebumps on your skin.
"You're alive," you still don't believe it at first, now studying his factions like they were still craved in stone back on your head. "After all these years, you couldn't tell me you were alive?"
It's a bad joke, one that makes you laugh leaving a bittersweet taste in your mouth — "You couldn't tell your best friend you were leaving? Nobody talked about you all of sudden, you became a dream. Almost making me sure you never existed at all."
"That's what they told you? That I leaved?" the way he's telling the information makes you furrow your brows in response, trying to make sense of what he was saying: Was he implying they lied to you?
"Please, explain me then" you're not in the mood of fighting, instead, you want information, crucial information to what you were choosing to be "Enlighten me. Tell me why you left me there without saying goodbye. Why it doesn't seem to affect you as much as it affected me."
The stranger has grown cold. He has now adapted beneath this rough amour that separated him from what he was before. So he doesn't give you any answers even when you question him, looking at you without saying a word.
You've changed too. You're not the little padawan that followed Indara around and look up at Torbin, you're not afraid of showing your force anymore, after all those years he has told you you're more than capable of defeating any enemy, you are starting to believe it more that ever. Even when he's not around to see that change happen in front of his eyes.
He's not going to answer, he's not talking nor giving you what you needed.
"Am I prisoner?" you ask again, another question added to the pile.
"Does it look like you're being held?" he asks back, squatting close to the stove in the fire to the stir his soup. "No. You're not my prisoner."
You resist the urge to roll your eyes. He always was a man full of pride, but now it seemed he thrive in it, in sharing his knowledge he was sure it was so powerful he needed to take a pupil, some kind of dark padawan he wanted to train.
"I don't know you anymore Qimir," you state out loud, hoping to talk to him as a long-time friend, as the person he was in love all those years but never acted on it too afraid of the rules at first. "I don't know who you've become, and i've been mourning you like it's only yesterday you vanished from my life, yet you've been alive, plotting against your family."
"Family?" he asks, hurted by the words you choose. "I've never had a family. You know that very well, it was always me against them, against anyone who questioned their power, their use and knowledge of the force."
"So is that how we are going to act now? Like pride is enough to make you leave and act like we were never a thing? That I wouldn’t die for you without even question?" you seem disappointed as you speak — “Why you didn’t kill me back there when you had the chance?”
He's taken back by your words, the sincerity as you admit what it seemed impossible to say back then. It’s known by him the feelings he had for you were enough to stop the whole galaxy, but he never had the courage to say something about it, to go against the rules and let alone admit to you anything at all.
So to know that you care for him, even when you talked about it like it was in the past, is enough to make him short-circuit, to make his face change in a new look.
“You already know why I didn’t kill you” he says it so casually while cooking, that even when you stand in the middle of the room trying to think about anything, anything more that him and his powerful gravity that made you spin around him, drawn by his pulling force — “Doesn’t matter who you stand with, i’d never do anything to you.”
You let that sink in. You let him say it cause maybe, deep down, it’s what you need. Your eyes are full of tears but you don’t want to let any single tear roll from your eyes the second you feel the sadness, you don’t want to show any weakness whatsoever, anything that will make you look less than what you really are.
“I could ask you the same” he says soon after, looking at you from over his shoulder in a low voice that sends shivers down your spine “Why did you let me live back there?”
It’s a bruise in your ego, to your sense of defense — Walls up, not letting any feeling show at all. His question is left out in the space as you look at him through narrowed eyes, reminding yourself he’s the enemy.
He cannot have the satisfaction. He’s the one behind Verosha’s twin sister after all, the one who send her to seek her own revenge. You know you should kill him with no second though, to cease with the leak, destroy the rebel cause that was so dark and powerful, so dangerous, but as before, you can’t hurt him by any chance, too attached to the enemy to even think about using the force against him.
Qimir. You don’t expect him to be alive, to be so angry at his lies. You don’t expect him to be the threat to peace and tranquility you’ve been so warned about.
Fuck that. You can’t deal with him again.
Maybe you are a coward after all, not worthy of being called a Jedi Knight. Always too unsure, questioning if you’re doing things the right way.
It’s not your fight. It’s not your place to be, you’re not his prisoner so you reach your lightsaber quick enough to leave his side, holding the weapon against your bare hands as you leave the cave, facing the daylight and the ocean in front of you.
You're not his prisoner, so you quickly leave as soon as you can leave, unable to hold his gaze anymore, to answer a question you shouldn't be asked. Even if it's cold outside, the sun still shines and you are sure you're going to find a ship that will take you out of there, as far as possible — Maybe, even leave him there.
But when you walk, you're followed close by in silence. Not a prisoner, but not free enough to leave free whiningly.
Even when you pace fasten enough to try to leave him behind, it seems like it's not a physical effort to follow you near by, to follow the same footsteps you give in order to look for a way to get out.
What's his plan anyway? Follow you forever? He's going to get tired soon enough, the problem is you don't have the patience enough to wait for it, you can't wait for Qimir to be enlightened by mercy, to be rational, to let you leave so you can be as far away from him as possible.
So at any sudden sound, you happen to snap, to turn on the sable in one swift movement, quick enough to pull it against his neck, almost touching his skin, the blue light reflecting in his pupils as he seemed pleased by your attention.
That's what he wants in the end. Even if it's anger, he wants to get any reaction out for him.
"Stop following me around" it's a knot on your throat, a sting in the heart as you threat him, the sound of your voice almost mixing with the loud crashing of the ocean. "You said yourself, i'm no prisoner."
He can sense your anger yet he's devastated by what you've become, devastated by finally being in front of you. Even when you're hesitating to spare his life once again, he's driven by the smell he was so caught on before, the memories you brought, attacked by the lonely life he was forced to live, the perks he enjoyed embracing his dark side.
It seems like forever, an eternity while the energy just flows, while the tension consume you both.
You're caught in a spiderweb you cannot get out, cause when he opens his mouth to speak again, you don't expect to make your world tremble that way.
"I was searching for you."
You know what's coming next, the sound of his voice like a recorder playing over and over in your head, the vibrations of his tone matching the ones you've been dreaming about lately.
"I was searching for you. Even in my dreams."
It's enough to make you lower your sable.
To make the stranger smile.
my masterlist
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certaimromance · 4 months ago
Text
𝜗𝜚 So Close, Quantico.
Post prison Reid x Fem!reader
Read part one here!
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Summary: A strange visit to the prison ends with an unexpected confession of love and makes you run away again. You were ready to leave, but maybe this time he'll make you stay.
Words: 2,5k.
TW: literally none, just drama and sweet love+emily being a bestie. english is not my first language (sorry for my mistakes, be kind please).
Note: I didn't expect to be asked for a second part because I'm still new here and I don't think anyone will read me (intrusive thoughts lol), but here I am giving it to you because Spencer needs a happy ending!
♡ Enjoy! ♡
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Just as you sat down and pulled out a travel magazine to read while you waited for your flight, you got a call from Emily. You frowned and were confused for a few seconds until you remembered that you hadn't told her that you were going back to London so soon and that the possibility of having a drink together would not be fulfilled. You hadn't even said goodbye in person, and it was only now that you realized it.
You hadn't noticed anything after working on Spencer's case for four days straight and losing your mind over it. It was the first time you hadn't seen your client or personally briefed him on the progress of the investigation, and that impersonality made everything strange, but you knew he didn't want to see you, and you weren't going to push him. At least you managed to get him released on parole after you found some evidence of third party involvement in his alleged crime. And as soon as you were informed of this decision, you assigned a trusted lawyer to the case, booked a flight, and packed your bags.
“Don't hate me, but I'm about to catch a flight and I forgot to tell you.” You said quickly as soon as the call started and you could hear a sigh of shock from the other end.
“You what? Why? You just got here and we haven't even had a chance to talk and drink wine.” She replied after a few minutes of processing the information.
“I'm really sorry, Ems. I have things to do at my office and my work here is already done.” You tried to explain as you fiddled with the hem of your skirt. You didn't like the idea of looking like you were running away again, even if you were. “I really have to go.”
“You have or you want?”
The question alone made you sigh and question being best friends with a profiler. It was impossible to hide your feelings and thoughts from her.
“It doesn't matter...anyway, you can visit me whenever you want, I have plenty of wine at home.” You spoke trying to avoid her question at all costs. “Penelope and JJ can come, girls' night out and all.”
“And Spencer...?” She asked in a cautious tone, knowing that this was a complicated subject. After all, Emily was the one who had to put up with your sighing and crying over Reid for years.
“He's not a girl.”
You could almost see her roll her eyes at your answer, and by the tone of her voice when she told you she meant it, you knew she did.
“Seeing him was as strange as I imagined, but confirming that he doesn't want to see me and that he hates me felt worse than I thought. I have to face this from a distance.” You tried to explain and put into words the feelings you were avoiding.
“He doesn't hate you, and he definitely wants to see you.” She corrected you, making you frown.
“What? Please don't try to make me feel better with emotional profiling tricks.” You said wearily, looking up at the big screen with the flight schedules and realizing that it was still more than half an hour before your plane was due to arrive.
“These are not tricks. Seriously, if he didn't want to see you, he wouldn't have asked me for your hotel address yesterday.”
Your heart stopped at that moment, and any attempt to focus your attention on something else, or even keep your cool, failed. You didn't want to get your hopes up again and sound like a fool for getting excited about something so minimal.
“I'm not even at the hotel anymore, and he never went there.” You tried to control your nervousness and conceal how this information had thrown you. “Ems, my flight arrives in 30 minutes, I have to leave you, but I promise to call you more often and visit you sometime. I love you.” You ended in a chaotic way.
“Well, me too. But don't disappear, I'll wait for that girls' night.” She replied, defeated by your insistence, and paused before speaking again. “And tell Reid we have a case in Utah, we're leaving in 30.”
“What?” You asked immediately, not understanding if you had heard wrong, but she had already hung up.
You looked up again, expecting to see the central screen with the schedules, but instead of seeing your flight number in bright letters, you saw Spencer's brown eyes searching for you a few feet away. You had to blink several times to confirm that it was him and that you weren't hallucinating, and only then did Emily's last words make sense.
Was he here to see you? Was it possible?
You remained motionless in your seat, as if bound to it, and watched as Reid walked at a brisk pace straight towards you. It was the first time you had seen him since that chaotic visit to the prison, and you still had a bittersweet taste in your mouth from that interaction. He was wearing a suit now, probably the clothes he wore to work, and he looked like he had run several miles, judging by his disheveled hair and labored breathing.
“What are you doing here?” You asked as soon as you had him in front of you, rising from your seat to be at his height even though you were several inches shorter.
“I needed to talk to you for days and you never came to see me again.” He explained, still trying to regulate his breathing after searching for you all over the airport. “About what you told me before you left.”
“I didn't come back because you made it clear that you didn't want to see me, and I respected your wish.” You explained as calmly as you could. “And as for what I said, there's no need to talk about it. It's outdated and I shouldn't have brought it up.”
You saw him sigh and fidget chaotically for a second before he spoke again. He seemed nervous, as if he had rehearsed the conversation a thousand times in his mind.
“I need to talk about this. You told me you were in love with me...I just found out and I couldn't stop thinking about it, it's stuck in my head because you never told me.” He tried to speak slowly, but it was as if the old Spencer you once knew had reappeared and started babbling. “You said you were leaving because you were offered a better position and you were bored with this job, you never mentioned that...that you liked me.”
“My flight leaves in less than 30 minutes, I can't talk now.” You tried to get out of the situation, but he gently grabbed your arm before you could escape. And with a sigh, you spoke again. “Good. I never told you how much I liked you, but that doesn't change anything.”
You pulled away from his touch and putting your hands on your bags so you could leave soon.
“It changes. It really changes everything.”
“What? How?” You dropped the suitcases and looked at him in confusion.
He remained silent for a few seconds, looking at the clock on the bright screen above you, trying to use the little time he had to talk to you and express himself. He felt the words catch in his throat, and it was a disappointment after having only you as the protagonist of all his thoughts since you had visited him, pushing away any possibility of holding a grudge against you because the only thing on his mind was doubt about what would have happened if he had known.
Spencer had spent so many years locked in hate, trying to hold a grudge against you for leaving, leaving nothing but torturous memories in an eidetic memory and a ridiculous need for a hug from you every time things went wrong. And suddenly you showed up, looking as beautiful as ever, saving him from a traumatic experience and delivering information he never expected.
He had only been free for a few days and yet everyone looked at him differently, from pity to fear, knowing that prison had changed him forever. But not you, you looked at him as if he were the same as always, even though years had passed and you had only seen his worst face again.
“If I had known...if you had told me I...” He stammered, trying to find some courage to stop feeling like the same young man you had left. “You would know that I felt the same way.”
At that moment, you almost had to sit up again because of the impression his words had made on you. You closed your eyes and opened them again to make sure that you were not hallucinating and that it was really the one you had been dreaming about for years who was telling you that he also felt something for you before.
“You don't have to lie...no, don't lie to me like that just because I got you out of jail.” You started to blurt out, completely denying the strong beating of your heart.
“I appreciate you doing this, but I won't lie to you. I could never do something like this.” He assured you, looking you straight in the eye for confirmation. “And if you don't believe me, I can tell you exactly when I first realized I liked you, it was November 8, 2005, it was 11:35 in the morning because I looked at the clock. You had completed your third month with us and you went to talk to Gideon and Hotch because you wanted to get out in the field and stop doing paperwork. You were so nervous about getting fired that you grabbed my hand before you left, but you didn't notice because you were busy listening to my comments about your performance. I thought it was nothing and that I was just nervous because you were the only one I was talking to and I was afraid of losing you, but before you left you smiled at me and I knew everything was going to be okay. Again I thought it was nothing...but every time things went wrong I thought about it, I still do because that smile is probably the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life.”
“I...” You tried to speak and formulate even one word, but it kept getting stuck in your throat.
“Wait, I'm not done yet.” He interrupted you, saving you from a possible babble. “I never told you because I thought you didn't feel the same way and that you saw me as a younger brother to be taken care of. I'd rather have you as a friend than not have you at all, so I left it in my mind as an impossibility and I thought I was completely over it until you left and I lost my mind...and it's happening again.”
“God, I need to sit down.” It was all you could say at the time as you tried to process everything he said.
You sat down with his help and watched him relax a little as he finished speaking, as if he had waited a long time to say it and had practiced it many times. You felt your heart pound after years of dreaming of hearing those words from him. You had never imagined a life where Spencer felt anything more than friendship for you, and now it was real. He had loved you as much as you wanted, and you had been too blind to see it before other people came along.
“I know it's been years since you got over me and that I was a jerk to you when you came to see me, but you need to know that ever since I saw you I couldn't stop thinking about what my life would have been like if I had told you from the beginning.” He spoke again, trying to look closely at you to decipher what was going through your mind. “I'm sorry, I'm really sorry if this has upset you or...”
“Do you know how long I've waited to hear you say that?” You said, still surprised, taking the opportunity to get up from your chair.
“I'm sorry, I know it's too late and now you're going to leave again, but this time I'm here to ask you not to do it again.” He came over and took you by the hands, bending down a little to be at your level, as if he was begging you. “And I know it's selfish because you have to go and you have a life away, but I really...”
“Spencer.” You stopped him before he started babbling, and he looked at you anxiously for your answer. “It's not too late.”
“Really?” He asked, as if he could not believe he had heard you correctly.
“Really.”
You gave him a small smile of affirmation and felt your eyes glaze over with emotion as you felt him release your hands and grab your cheeks to wipe away the stray tear that had fallen. The look of tenderness he gave you along with his touch made you tremble.
“Are you planning to kiss me already or are you going to wait 13 more years?” You spoke without even thinking.
He didn't have to think once before closing the distance between you and fulfilling the longing that had been in your mind for so long. You couldn't say anything because his lips had been on yours before and the first contact had almost made you melt. His hands were still on your cheeks, but one of them went down to your waist to pull you closer and make sure you were real.
Your lips tasted like cherries and that made him smile immediately in the middle of the kiss, thinking that you were still wearing the same lipstick that you had applied in front of him so many times and that he had only dreamed of tasting. Finally, the reality was far better than any fantasy and the softness mixed with the intensity of a repressed love during the kiss because finally the stars had aligned for the two of you.
“Are you going to go out on a date with me?” He asked as soon as you both parted.
“I have a girls' night out first.” You replied, letting it be known that you were tired of running away. “But I'd love to go on a date with you.”
He came over and gave you a quick kiss before you could say anything else. You returned the kiss and then pulled away, putting your arms around his neck.
“You're kissing me like this before the first date?” You joked, still trapped in the bubble of love you felt you were in.
“I don't intend to wait any longer now that I have you here.” He responded by giving you a kiss on the head and wrapping his arms around you to hug you. “So please don't go away for 6 years again.”
“I don't plan to go anywhere now.”
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themultifanshipper · 3 months ago
Note
Hello.
I have a question to ask. Are you up for a honeymoon fic Landoscar? With a lot of spicy things, hehe.
<3
When Oscar and Lando had woken up severely hungover that first morning after getting married at the Vegas GP, they knew they had made the right choice.
The only problem was how the hell they were going to go on their honeymoon without arousing suspicion.
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Gonna go waterboard myself in holy water now brb
Warnings: Lando makes Oscar cry, but in a sexy way, sunburns, handjob, that’s it that's the plot, under negotiated everything, edging, Oscar being in denial, cum, facial, they're both fucking freaks
They got married on 20/11/2023 at 4:12 AM in the little Vegas Chapel after the Grand Prix. It was perfect (they barely remembered it) and the only people there were Alex and Logan (the best men) and the priest (who they had to track down later and make him sign an NDA).
All in all a brilliant night.
And the proof of consummation was… well, all over them and the sheets when they woke up.
How fucking romantic.
It was now a year on from that and they still hadn't been on their honeymoon.
They were determined though. But being in the public eye made any vacationing together quite hard.
So they decided to wait. Wait long enough that if they were seen, it would be reasonable to assume it was just a mates trip to a private Island.
They were currently on said private Island one morning, limbs tangled on a sunbed, sipping some pretty strong cocktails.
“What do you want to do today?”
“I don't care as long as I'm with you”
They giggled and a slap resounded on the empty beach.
“I hate you”
“That's not what you were saying last night when I had you-”
“Okay okay! I get it!”
Disgusting.
After another hour of lounging around, Lando untangled his limbs from Oscar's and got up to get more drinks.
“You want anoth- holy shit Osc!”
His eyes widened as he turned and took in his husband’s (he'd never get tired of saying that) appearance.
“What?” Oscar sat up, confused.
Oscar’s front was a similar shade of red as a lobster, the contrast in skin between his front and back making him look like a vanilla strawberry ice cream.
“Oscar you-” Lando couldn't contain his laughter “you forgot to put cream on again!”
Lando put his hand on Oscar's thigh and Oscar gasped in pain.
“Shit baby we need to go put something on that, let's go”
Oscar ended up laying on his back while Lando straddled his midsection and rubbed Aloe over his face and chest.
“Ah!” he hissed as a hand went over a patch of particularly red skin “careful where you put your bear paws!”
Lando laughed and squirted some more cream on his hands.
“Sorry baby, but it needs to be done. Besides you love my bear paws, especially when I put them on your-”
“Jesus, do you ever shut up!” Oscar laughed and Lando gasped at his meanness.
“Don't be mean to me when I'm helping you out!”
Oscar’s hands came up to cup Lando's ass over his shorts and squeeze lightly.
“You love it when I'm mean though, don't lie.”
“Oh yeah?” Lando smiled playfully “I can be mean too you know”
Oscar couldn't help the snort that escaped him. “Yeah right, I'll believe that when I see it, you’re just too sweet”
“I am not!” he tried to defend but Oscar just laughed at him “You just haven't seen my bad side, yet”
Oscar cackled and shot a look of disbelief at Lando.
Lando raised his eyebrows in challenge and shuffled backwards onto Oscar's thighs, making sure to rub against his crotch on the way.
“Shut up and let me finish putting the cream on” he scowled as he squirted a load straight onto Oscar's hot skin moodily.
“Aw… are you getting stroppy now because I laughed at you, baby?” Oscar cooed, hands reaching for Lando but he slapped them away.
“Touche me, or say another word, and I stop completely, understand?”
Oscar nodded, eyebrows almost fused with his hairline at Lando's harsh tone.
“And we'll see just how fucking mean I can be” the older man growled.
Well shit.
Lando quickly rubbed cream over Oscar's burns, before sitting back and ordering him to take his shorts off.
“Pardon?” Oscar wasn't used to being ordered around.
“If I have to repeat myself then I'll take them off, and I’m not going to be gentle”
That's a point, Oscar thought. He didn't want to take any chances with the burns so he peeled them off himself, making sure to give his skin a wide birth.
Once settled back into the sheets, Lando grabbed more cream and started rubbing it around Oscar's crotch, which was unnecessary given that the skin there was free of burns thanks to his shorts. But Lando apparently decided to turn this into a massage, because he was digging his thumbs into Oscar’s flesh, hard enough to make him groan at the feeling.
Then he dug his thumbs into Oscar's adductor muscles and the younger man yelped and stared daggers at him.
“What's the matter, baby?” Lando asked mockingly, “Am I going too hard for you?”
His eyes were inviting him to a challenge, one he knew Oscar wouldn't back down from.
Oscar shook his head, remembering Lando's warning from before, and quickly settled back down.
This was a new side to Lando. And it was getting Oscar a bit hot and bothered as his husband just carried on massaging/torturing him. The idea of being at his husband's mercy was turning him on enormously.
His dick twitched against his stomach and Lando chuckled.
“Careful Osc, one could think being submissive is turning you on” his voice was full of mirth but Oscar refused to acknowledge him, and stared at the ceiling while shaking his head.
“No? Must be mistaken then”
He continued along Oscar's groin, massaging the cream in and rubbing him in all the right places.
When Lando cupped his balls and pressed on his perineum at the same time, Oscar let out a strangled gasp.
He was dripping, he could feel it. But he refused to give Lando the satisfaction of asking him to touch him.
“You want me to stop Osc?” Lando had a teasing lilt to his voice. Oscar shook his head.
“If you want me to touch you all you have to do is be a good boy and say ‘please”
But Oscar, by some twisted sense of ego, refused to give in so he didn't answer.
Lando laughed softly and ran a finger up Oscar's cock, making the younger man shudder and his hips buck up of their own volition.
“That looks painful, Osc”
“Then fucking touch it”
Lando’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Not until you say please”
“Please” Oscar huffed out.
Lando tutted. “That wasn't very convincing, Osc.” His fingers ran along the tip and back down over his balls, but Oscar just about managed to stay impassive. He looked right into Lando's eyes.
“If you want me to say please you're going to have to do better than that”
Lando grinned like a Cheshire cat.
“Oh honey, I'm not going to stop until you're begging”
The look in his eyes was predatory and Oscar almost caved then and there.
But on principal, Oscar did not beg.
Cut to about 30 minutes later and Oscar was whimpering into his arm as Lando placed kitten licks on his dripping tip.
“Still not desperate enough to say please?”
Oscar just growled “nope” but it was so strained Lando barely heard it.
“Fine, maybe I need to try a different approach, then”
Oscar looked on as Lando grabbed the cream and squirted some straight onto Oscar’s cock.
Oscar hissed at the cold, but it was nothing compared to the feeling of Lando's large hand engulfing his cock and immediately starting a fast, tight, pace.
Oscar was writhing at the sudden intense pleasure after so long being teased, and he was having trouble getting air in his lungs as he hurdled towards an orgasm in record time.
His toes curled and his back arched as he felt the orgasm creep up his spine.
But just like that the feeling was replaced by a very tight hold around the base of his cock, the release his body craved ripped away from him.
“No! Lan-”
“Shhh, baby” Lando cooed “It's okay, I’ve got you”
While Oscar slowly came down from his almost-release, Lando reapplied some cream to make the slide as wet as possible, then proceeded to start stroking Oscar at the same pace as before, this time adding extra pressure.
Oscar was openly whining now, hands gripping the sheets so hard it’s shocking they weren't tearing.
“Now, I'm going to do that over and over again until you’re a good boy for me, okay”
Oscar couldn't contain the whine that came out of his mouth. He was getting close again and his eyes were filling up with tears at the white hot pleasure.
“Please” he let out a broken sob as his thighs started clenching with his impending orgasm.
“Oh you can do better than that, Osc” Lando’s pace didn't falter.
“Fuck- please Lan, I'll do anything. I need to come so bad, please, please. Please don't stop…” he was openly sobbing now, tears running down his cheeks as he took shuddering breaths.
He was so beautiful and pliant like this, Lando was unbelievably hard. He took pity on him and allowed him to come, other hand going to massage his balls for good measure.
“Good boy, Oscar. You can come now, go on.”
Oscar screamed as he came, hot spurts of his come landing over his abs and all the way up to his chin.
The sight of him, covered in his own cum, flush deepening the red of his burns, gasping for air, almost made Lando come on the spot.
He shuffled over to Oscar's head and pushed his shorts down to jerk himself off furiously.
“Open your mouth, tongue out” he ordered, grabbing Oscar’s jaw and aiming for his tongue.
It took him no time at all to come, and most of it landed on Oscar's cheeks and chin. It was absolutely sinful, the way his face was streaked with come, tongue hanging out, eyes unfocused, he looked like a sick man's dream.
Fortunately, Lando was a sick man.
“Shit Osc, I can't believe it took me this long to find out you’re a good little slut when you want to be”
Oscar took a long time to reply, trying to regulate his breathing.
When he finally did, a low growl came from his side of the bed.
“As soon as I get the feeling back in my legs, I'm going to fuck you until the sun sets, and I'm not giving you any breaks, no matter how many times you come”
Lando glanced at the clock.
It was only 1 pm…
Shit.
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anadiasmount · 5 months ago
Text
known strangers - jude bellingham x reader.
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quick sum: when a stranger from the past is now your future, how are things going to work when the only thing in mind you have is that weekend and him. your boss.
wc: 4k | masterlist | jude’s masterlist
psa 🗣️: HIIIIII!!! ceo!jude ?? yess plsss!! inspired by a clip back when he did cibieles, and a few requests i mixed and played around with 🤭🤭 like always hope you enjoy!! and i am sooo sorry for delaying this!! yet i do feel i'm getting back on track 🤞🏻
“it should not be this fucking hot… why is it so hot?” you blabber to yourself, the wind blowing pieces of your hair around all over the place, making them stick to your lipgloss. you gently removed them from your lips, but they frustrated you more as they returned. your heels clicked against the floor, tugging your purse tighter once you arrived at the huge, tall building downtown. 
you were directed right away by the receptionist, her simple instructions to take the elevator to the last floor and then turn left. you felt frozen upon seeing the metal doors, a bubble of anxiety rising through your throat as you began to take it all in. the huge building, the fancy decor, the employees. you felt more than fortunate to land a job a couple of months after you graduated. 
most of your friends and people you attended uni with either landed jobs before graduation or were still looking for those opportunities. your line of work came in handy, and you were very pleased at how much you had achieved at your age. you could travel, work, spoil yourself, and make a title for yourself. this was the first chance for you to start your career independently and you took that very seriously. 
you scrolled aimlessly on your phone while waiting for the elevator doors to close, checking the latest emails and texts from your friends, holding your purse tight, and fixing your hair back to how it should've been before the wind ruined it. “advice them to assure they're all prepared, the last time they couldn't even utter a word and take responsibility for what they did…” you looked up, standing straighter as you heard a deep voice. 
the word scared couldn't even define how you felt at that moment, the blood rushing down your face and stomach-turning upon seeing a similar figure. the same person you spent a night with a summer ago. you recognized him from a mile away as he moved in slow motion, or was it just in your head? it couldn’t possibly be him? or could it?
you looked away almost immediately when you locked eyes for a few seconds, clearing your throat and pretending not to be bothered, but truly you were dying inside just a little. not a little, a lot, you felt like throwing up. maybe you were being dramatic, but a worse fear of yours was seeing somebody you recognize or know in public.
oh how much you wanted to be over, yet it didn't end. the elevator ride was endless, the four walls feeling like they were closing you in, filled with heated tension, and awkwardness. All you could do was breathe quietly, look up to be faced with his firm and structured back under his suit, or be on your phone. you let out a sigh of relief once you walked out, legs wobbly, and your stomach back in place, thankful you didn't throw up from nerves. 
you quickly forgot about it, knowing he didn't remember you or acknowledged it. you attended the first meeting of the day, getting to meet a couple of new coworkers who would be participating in the same campaign as you. you all settled to get drinks and lunch together later on after finishing a hypothetical proposal and outline. 
a bead of happiness burst in your chest. you could get used to this, it wasn't as bad as it seemed and you fitted in with the rest of them there. 
—--------------- 𝒿.𝒷  —---------------
“this weather is so bipolar i don't think my hair will handle it,” said lilly frustrated, shaking her umbrella and putting it away. “as an american this is completely different than where i live, i’d be dying from the heat right now,” she jokes earning a laugh from everyone. “i promise it’s not that bad,” chris sarcastically says shrugging off his coat. 
“that bad? it rained all week!”
you were allowed an hour break for lunch, so you all settled for a nice coffee shop across the street since the weather didn’t look promising. after debating and getting conceived by lilly, you ordered an iced coffee and chocolate croissant, content and ready to eat something. the whole group sat by the windows, getting distracted by the rainfall before julian spoke up. 
“have you guys met the ceo?” you shake your head no, having no idea what they were or who exactly they were referring to. “no, let’s not even call in that negative energy… the receptionists in the front were gossiping how he had super high expectations for us after last years team was a disaster,” julian stressed, shaking horrified, almost as he had been part of it. 
“who exactly is the ceo?” you asked with an unsure smile, earning looks and daggers. “what? what do you mean you don’t know who he is? he basically runs this entire city!” julian was first to speak making you laugh, “you’re joking right?” you deadpan earning a shake from julian. “no… you do realize we have a meeting later with him… right?” 
“i barely fully moved in two days ago and haven’t had time to do any research,” you explain taking a sip of your drink. “okay why did i also not know this?” chris exclaimed taking his phone out immediately to check his email. 
“guys we can’t forget stuff like this especially when he has strictly scheduled meetings with us! i’m not lying when i say this man will fire us on the spot,” stressed julian making you and lilly snicker a laugh but totally agreeing with him. you couldn’t lose this job just because of minor details like this. you needed to be prepared and organized. 
“what else do you know about this ceo?” lilly teased him, laughing when he squinted his eyes towards her. 
“well for starters this man is strict and loves his work done in a well manner. if he believes you won't succeed with him, he won't even bother to call you into his office. he was born and raised in england his whole life, he's considered like royalty now with the status he has. you can probably piece he’s the most young eligible bachelor if women are luck to cross his path.” 
“he started his company at a young age, no one knows by what or what inspired him, but it's rumored by a small incident when he was young. he's rated most arogant, executive, successful, directorial ceo in all of europe. If that doesn’t scare you than i don’t know what does…” he finished saying. 
“well then… no pressure guys,” you joked 
—--------------- 𝒿.𝒷  —---------------
“my hand hurts i can’t write anymore,” you sigh removing your glasses and gently closing your eyes feeling how dry and irritated they were, from switching to your ipad and writing notes in your notebook. “that double espresso shot hasn’t kicked in yet,” yawned chris, standing up and stretched. 
“for our first day we haven’t done so bad-”
a knock on the glass doors made everyone turn their head, a woman in her late 50s came in, “your scheduled meeting with the ceo is in five.” a sudden mood shift was practically immediate, everyone glancing at each other before prancing around to gather their items. julian even taking a breather before being the first to walk out. 
your steps stopped, lilly almost crashing into you as you stared ahead to the one person you didn’t think of ever seeing again. jude. there was no describing how you felt, you couldn’t hear anything around you, just focused on him. How he spoke and had this angry daze on him. julian wasn't lying when he said everyone feared him, you just prayed he didn’t call or recognize you. 
“you good?”
“y-yeah-h i’m fine! It just hit me out of nowhere you,” you quickly lied, offering a small smile before hiding behind everyone. 
jude looked up dismissing what seemed like his assistant before stepping over to where you all stood. luck didn’t seem to be on your side, since everyone got into a line and put on their most professional smile. jude shook everyone's hand, greeting them and welcoming them to his company. your chest moved up and down as he approached you, biting the inside of your lip anxiously. 
“hello, welcome. i’m jude bellingham, it's a delight… to have you here,” jude stammered, his hand shaking yours slower almost as if he wanted to take a better look. you barely looked up just focused on shaking his hand and for him to continue down to the last person. “thank you for having us here,” you spoke softly, removing your hand gently so he could continue on. 
jude’s stare lingered on you earning a small shove from lilly who asked with her eyes, “does he know you? do you know him?” you ignored, rather focusing now on your shoes which you had not noticed had mud on them, a headache wanting to appear just by the couple last minutes. 
how was it possible? how was it possible for the two of you to be here? in the same room? he was now your boss, and you were his employee. you were to follow his rules, while he just observed and made them. this wasn’t how it was supposed to go. you envisioned a dream different than this. you were convinced it was someone else but not him? 
you avoided him at all costs, not wanting to make it weird for him or yourself, but rather save the embarrassment and fear you felt for some other time. if you felt he got nearer you walked away somewhere else, you looked up when it felt like he was the only one staring at you while he spoke. the only constant thought in your head was to act like the professional y/n everyone knew. the one who held her head up high, and got her way no matter what. 
------- ୨୧ -------
“why is it you’re doing this?” you asked cheerfully, slipping into jude’s hold as he fixed his sunglasses and laid back on the pool chair. “i don’t understand what you mean?” he shrug, his hand racing from your spine down to your bum, where he rubbed it softly over the bikini material. “explain to me darling.”
“we just met jude… it feels like we’ve known each other longer… surely it feels like something else…”
jude chuckled. “i’ll keep it simple. i happened to be on a business trip and i stumbled across you. you’ve recently graduated, and traveled here to celebrate. though now you're here with me… in this lounge chair, in my bed, in my arms, because that how attached we’ve gotten? tell me i’m wrong?” he challenged, as he leaned up and slid you onto his lap. 
“you’re wrong,” you dared with a huge smile on your face sliding your hands onto his shoulders feeling his lips pepper kisses onto your jaw. 
“then i’m not doing my job correctly.” 
------- ୨୧ -------
“i wanna know more about you, tell me,” you leaned over slightly grabbing his hand and brushed your thumb softly over his knuckles. jude’s eyes followed your movements feeling hesitant since he never did this. his job didn’t allow him to have enough personal time to be himself. but with you, he’d kill to spend every moment together. 
so he found himself losing himself in your eyes and allowing himself to reply to any question, doubt, feeling you had. “i promise i’m not that interesting as you think…” 
“surely that can’t be true? there's always something more hidden, a locked mystery in a person who doesn't fully show themselves to the world…” you reply taking a sip of your wine staring into his intense eyes, not knowing that behind them jude was already obsessing and going crazy about the idea of you. you allowed yourself to be you and vulnerable, why couldnt he?
“ask me anything.” 
------- ୨୧ -------
“what's the biggest aspiration you had as a kid?” jude randomly asked, tucking his head closer into your neck. “the word aspiration would be impossible for five year old me to know. the dream she had was to explore the ocean as a mermaid, then grow up to be teacher,” you rambled.
“would she be proud of the person you are now?” 
“she would be mad because of stubborn she was but yes, more than proud…” 
------- ୨୧ -------
Jude’s chest burned with anger, grabbing the nearest item before throwing hearing it break into tiny pieces. He took a seat by the balcony looking over to the small 
‘dear jude, 
the past week has been the most strangest yet fulfilled week i’ve ever had. never did i imagine to meet an extraordinary person like you. and so it pains me write this knowing we have different and separate lives. believe me, i’m saving you from something that would’ve turned ugly. you deserve better and its not me. you have exclusivity, a richer mentality that i know for sure i can’t live up to… just think of me of the one person who you first ever truly got to be yourself with… five year old jude would be proud.
- y/n ♡︎
jude was back to the old him. the one before meeting you. the one too busy for anything and focused on his companies future. yet he couldn’t think at all, your scent lingering around his rrom, in the white button up you wore the night before, just right after moaning his name during your high.  
he laughed in disbelief, once again feeling the disappointment and pain in his chest, gliding across the room to the coffee bar where a almost empty bottle of whiskey stood. not thinking it one second and grabbing the bottle to take a huge jug of the bitter drink. 
“exclusivity my ass.”
—--------------- 𝒿.𝒷  —---------------
“anything else we can get for you sir?” your coworker asks, jude sighing and loosing his tie. you looked down at your feet, making sure your heels were still shiny after stepping on mud but cleaning it off as you shifted your weight nervously. “you. what’s your name?” his tone laced with a demanding manner. “me?-” lilly blurted.
“no her, the one next to you.” 
“i’m y/n… what can i help with,” you nodded. you felt exposed under a microscope. like a new scientific specie discovered. everyone's eyes were on you, making you want to run out and book the first flight back. jude’s eyes widen a tad bit, not knowing if he was just taking you in or if he remembered that same night back in the almafi coast. 
“that’s it for today. i will see you all wednesday,” jude shook his head, a bubble of relief bursting through his chest when he recognized you. that same excitement from that night you first met, where you spent the entire evening together, drinks, dinner, dancing, to then sharing his bed in the most intimate manner. 
had you remembered him like he did? 
“y/n? please stay back, i’d like to run a few things with you,” you were sure your stomach had dropped to your ass again for the second time today, heart banging in your chest that doctors would’ve busted into the room quickly. your friend gave you a confused look, receiving a shy smile from you. you weren’t sure what he wanted, or expected, all you wanted was to leave. 
“what can i help with?” you said again, taking short strides as you opened your notebook and prepared to take notes. “why is that i recognize you from somewhere?” jude pushed his brows in, eyes roaming you as you took a seat in front of him. you gulped afraid your voice would sound scared and small in front of jude. could you even call him that? or would you have to refer to him as sir like others? “uh… maybe you have me confused with someone else,” you offered a lie, pursing your lips. 
“no. i know who you are…” jude persisted
“i’m sorry sir, i think you are mistaken-”
“jude, call me jude.”
“j-jude, this is a huge misunderstanding,” you giggle nervously shaking your hands, watching as the tall man stands up from his chair and came around to sit on his desk right exactly infront of you. his jaw clenched, leaning slightly back as his hand interlocked and rested just below his stomach, watching as he took a deep breath. “some could argue it isn’t.”  
“i don't know-”
“last year i fired two people on their first day because they lied to me. will we have a repeat of that today y/n?” he said sternly making you scoff in disbelief. “excuse me? if me being here bothers you that much then it sounds like an ego problem,” you defend sitting up straight, closing your notebook. 
“i’m not here to waste your time or mine either. just get onto what you need to say,” you hurried no caring if you sassed or had an attitude. the nerve to threaten you, on your first day, just because of some history. ‘the history that keeps you up y/n’… said your conscious.
it’s true… and while you hated to bring him up, to recall every memory spent on that trip. you knew deep inside he wasn’t just a stranger. he was someone engraved in your mind until forever held its peace. 
you felt shitty the morning after leaving him. remembering how tears flew down your cheeks as you wrote the letter, how jude could sense the already empty space before you walked out. out of the room and his life. but never in your life had you become that scared of being that vulnerable and attached. 
every piece of him haunted you. the name, his music taste, the black tie he used the first night you shared a bed together, his briefcase filled with documents, the black gel pens, and gold watch. you felt him everywhere though he was no longer there. you knew the insecurities had won, and you accepted that a person like him could never be with you. the status, the medal he wore around his neck. you couldn’t be that. 
“what i need to say? it’s not even close to enough to what i felt after you left me… i know it was you in the elevator this morning, yet i fooled myself into thinking it wasn’t because surely it didn’t seem real…” you looked away rubbing your hands across your lap to clean off the sweat your palms began to build. 
“you didn’t mean anything to me… i lied,” you said quickly wanting to forget about him and to push him away. you couldn’t mess up this job opportunity. not wanting to risk what your colleagues, what the press would say. not wanting to risk the possibility of a lifetime just because of a week you spent together. you didn’t do all this work just to get nothing and over a man who just feel rage because of your fault. 
“you see, to me exclusivity means nothing to me. not when i know i have the voice to control and decide my life�� to chose who i want to spend the rest of my life with,” his voice sounded deep, he looked so hot with his suit on. just exactly how you remembered if not even more handsome. “then do it with someone else, you aren't enough, never will be,” you appointed quickly, standing up and paced around.
jude scoffed a laugh, not feeling an ounce of hurt, rather the exciting feeling in his veins, he sat still in the corner of his desk as he watched you frantically. “baby i’ll always be more than enough, my name is jude bellingham,” he turned you down wanting to laugh at the glare you gave him. “There’s more to us than the almafi coast, don’t you forget it,” he stood on his point, knowing there was no way out for you. 
he walked to you, hands in his pocket, “i just needed a warm bed to sleep with at night,” you said trying to hurt him and make him believe you were terrible, but he could see the lies behind your eyes… “the lies y/n… when will it stop and just admit you know you can't deceive me…” his chest brushed against your back, feeling his nose trace your ear down to the corner of your jaw. 
“you don’t want to tell me its fate?” he felt you crumble, how you allowed him to hold and let him continue. “you don’t mean to tell me you aren't here because the universe put us in this exact moment?” he defied, referring to a small astrology talk you had when walking on the beach late at night. 
“you’re just bluffing.”
“no you’re wrong…” he shook his head, turning you swiftly where he lifted your chin gently to face him. “you can try to forget and ignore me at all costs, just know i’m the only one here who know you. not just professionally but personally as well,” jude intimidated. yet you didn’t feel scared or frightened. you felt drawn to be closer and closer, because its the aura and affect he carried. 
“this is wrong jude, what will they say! you're my boss… everyone is afraid of you…” you said softly, breathing deeply as your forehead itched closer. “they should be afraid of me especially if they have the nerve to speak about you,” he lifted your face once again, wrapping an arm firmly around your waist. “but when i'm with you… i’m the man who i was back in the almafi coast. i don’t have to be forced to be someone i’m not, i can be jude… the jude five year old me would be proud of…” jude continued, pressing a kiss on your cheek. 
“jude…” you whimpered, hands gliding across his chest where you slowly drew up to his neck. 
“i’m angry with you so angry… for leaving me… for hurting me… for allowing me to get to this point…” jude spoke, his brows drawn in angrily yet holding you so gently, shaking his head at every sentence. “i’m sorry…” you attempted but instead were silenced by a small ‘shh’ jude hummed. 
“it can be scary i know it can, but we could have saved us from all this if we simply tried y/n… all i wanted was for us to try. you left me confused, used! you let me believe i was used by you because you left in the end. i was scared i had pushed you away,” jude spoke softly yet with a tone filled with remorse.
“i pushed myself away… my thoughts were consumed by past actions and beliefs jude! i did it with the intention to protect us from this! from the hurting you feel, felt! i can’t allow myself to get so attached to a person knowing the outcome it can have. we both don’t deserve that,” you humbled.
“we don’t darling, we don’t… but you're here with me… in my arms, what does that say?” you shrugged at him, feeling to pull away but the feeling of home in his arms was to much to overcome. 
“it means that were known strangers, and it won't be easy to just work under the same building knowing what we did, what we felt. and i’ll do anything to prove to you that exclusivity and status have nothing to do with the future i picture you and me with. there is a happy ever after for us, can’t you feel it?” he placed your small hand against his fast-beating heart. 
“yes,” you threw yourself at him, jude groaning as he devoured you as a whole. your kiss messy, not an ounce of sweetness, making up for the long european summer that held the distance you parted with. tasting you like it was his last meal, engraving your closed his in his mind knowing that no matter what, you were his. 
“mr. bellingham? the orders from germany have just arrived, and we had the underground staff separate them-” a man's voice spoke as they barged in seeing the whole scene uncut, wide eyes and lips as he stuttered out a response. knowing he walked into a lion's den, and it would be hell to get back out. you pushed away from jude, who held a confused stare, to then glaring at his assistant.  
“oh no…” you whimpered scaredily. 
—--------------- 𝒿.𝒷  —---------------
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