#Sophia Taylor

[tessa-liam]

Marabelle - 14 -

Lovers in a Dangerous Time - 14 -

Choices – The Royal Romance, AU – (cross-over with Rules of Engagement)

Series Premise – An American teenager from New York City is introduced to the world of a small European country and its society of royalty, nobility, and commoners. How will her life story be transformed? Will this new adventure bring her happiness...or regret?

Marabelle Series Masterlist, My Complete Masterlist

Main Pairing – Crown Prince Liam Rys x F!OC Lady Sophia (Sophie) Taylor

Other Pairings – Maxwell Beaumont x M!OC Daniel (from NYC), Drake Walker x F!OC Melanie Smithson

Most characters belong to Pixelberry Studios

Series Rating – M*🔞Warnings: this series will have NSFW material, drinking, crude language & innuendo.

Not Beta’d - Please excuse all errors.

Category – Alternate universe/on-going series/angst/fluff/cross-over with Choices Rules of Engagement

Words: 3434

Chapter Summary – It’s graduation night for Maxwell and along with Sophie and Daniel, they attend the festivities with family and friends at the University of Cordonia in the capital. Tasked with a diplomatic opportunity, Liam flies to Rome for a summit with Francesco and officials of the Italian parliament.

Music & Title Inspiration: Lovers in a Dangerous Time, Bare Naked Ladies, Ben Grosse

A/N1: Bethany Beaumont, Maxwell’s mother, is originally from the U.S. and is Barthelemy Beaumont’s second wife. Annabelle Beaumont (deceased) is Bertrand’s mother.

A/N2: ‘Social Season’ in this AU series refers to a traditional period in the spring/summer for royalty and members of the court to take part in Balls, dinner parties and charity events.

A/N3: Heartfelt thanks to @Selina012 for joining me in writing ideas and with dialogue for this chapter.

en route to Rome, Italy

Seated behind his computer screen, Liam scrolled through the files his advisors had given him earlier in the day. It was late into the evening and the plane was quiet. Drake was asleep in his chair, snoring softly, and Bastien was seated nearby, his eyes trained on his book. Rashad, standing for the crown’s legal counsel, was reviewing the proposals that would be discussed and implemented if agreed upon.

The only sound came from the occasional beep of the computer's keyboard as Liam entered the codes that would allow him to access the secure files. Sitting back, he began to read through and analyze the information. After an hour or so had passed by, Liam stopped to acknowledge the flight attendant who set down a late snack and two fingers of scotch.

After taking a sip, he turned to his head guard.

"I hope I'm not interrupting," Liam said quietly as he closed the laptop and set it aside.

"Of course not, sir," Bastien said. "What's on your mind?"

"I just had an interesting chat with a source. There have been rumors circulating in Cordonia that the 'Sons of the Earth' are organizing. The Sons have been out of power since the last time they rose up to oppose the monarchy over a decade ago.”

"They were never a real threat," Bastien stated, his tone confident.

"My source tells me that a new leader has risen within their ranks, someone who is very charismatic, and able to sway the others with his message. I am concerned, Bastien. The Sons were always an extreme faction, and they could prove dangerous if allowed to regain power."

"You want me to find out more about them?"

"Yes," Liam nodded. "And be discreet. If it turns out that this new leader has no real power, we can put this behind us. But if there's any threat or danger, we need to be ahead of it."

"Of course, sir. I will situate agents immediately."

"Thank you, Bastien." Liam's expression grew pensive as he turned back to open the computer. "There is something else."

"Sir?"

"This source tells me that the Sons' leader has taken a particular interest in a member of the nobility. It is believed that the noblewoman is being used to gain support among the other houses.”

"Which noblewoman?"

"Duchess Adelaide Amaranth," Liam answered, his gaze hardening. "According to the information I have, factions have been allowed to situate in Krona."

"You want me to investigate her involvement, as well."

"I'd like you to bring her in and question her, yes. And I want a full investigation into her financial records. See if you can uncover any ties between her and the Sons."

"Consider it done, sir."

Liam loved the power and responsibility of his role as the crown prince. He thrived on the challenges and opportunities it provided, and was excited for the day he would take the throne as king.

With his advisor's files securely tucked away, Liam leaned back in his chair, a slight smile on his lips. He was confident in his ability to lead Cordonia into a brighter future, and he knew that with his team of advisors, he would be successful.

He had never felt so ready for the challenges ahead, and he couldn't wait to take his place as Cordonia's leader. He glanced at his ring, the royal seal engraved on it and smiled.

Liam knew he was doing the right thing. He was prepared and would not let his country down. He would protect it, care for it, and ensure that it remained prosperous and safe for generations to come.

He thought back to his father, and the legacy he would leave behind. Liam knew that his father had been a good king, and he hoped to emulate him as much as possible. He hoped that he would live up to the standard his father had set.

But more than anything, he was looking forward to starting a life with Sophie. Their relationship was a secret for now to many, but he knew that their time would come. He had been thinking about their future together a lot lately, and he had an idea of what he wanted to do.

University of Cordonia, student dorms, Candace’s suite

Sophie stood in front of the mirror, helping Candy fix the accessories in her hair. "Candy, you look amazing, and you will definitely be the center of attention at the party tonight."

Candy, who was wearing a long purple dress, smiled and turned to take a satisfied look at her makeup. "Thanks Sophie! I picked this dress out especially for the grad, and Tom will be there, too. It's the first time we've ever been to a formal event like this together."

Sophie smiled with a hint of envy. "It's nice, you two look so good together. Speaking of which, Tom is your third boyfriend at Uni, right? You are always so popular with the guys."

Candy winked mischievously and patted Sophie on the shoulder. "Oh, Soph, don't say that. I'm just looking for the one who really belongs to me."

"Maybe, Candy," Sophie said, shaking her head. "I guess I just haven't met anyone yet. I am just fussy and hard to please," she grinned.

"...and you're almost a graduate. Why don't you even try to get a boyfriend? Maybe you're expecting too much of your future boyfriend, too."

Sophie laughed and waved her hand in front of her. Her relationship with Liam was still ‘under wraps’ with only family and Daniel knowing the truth. "No, it's not that. I have had some bad luck with dating in the past. And besides, I have other priorities."

Candy raised her eyebrows. "Other priorities?"

"Like finishing my education and starting my career." Sophie shrugged.

"Sophie, you know that's not enough to keep a man happy," Candy teased.

Candy's cell phone rang. She picked it up and saw that it was Tom. Candy suddenly smiled with joy, picked up the phone in front of Sophia and began to talk to Tom endlessly.

Sophie's sighed and went out on the balcony alone. The sky was now dark, and the stars dotted the night sky. The cool evening breeze touched her face and soothed her heart. As she looked around, the campus was enveloped in a colorful glow. The trees and buildings were decorated with all kinds of colorful lights and decorations. The celebration of the end of the school year filled every corner.

She picked up her phone and sent Liam a quick text and snapshot of the view from the balcony, her fingers jumping across the screen, and finally pressed send. But as the minutes ticked by Liam's response was slower to arrive than usual.

Sophie's eyes flashed a hint of loss, and she put the phone down slowly. She took a few deep breaths and recalled that Liam had said the previous night that he was going on a four-day business trip to Italy with his advisors. Perhaps he is now busy meeting with the Italian politicians. In a few days they'd see each other again, she put her phone into her clutch and smiled.

Just then the balcony door was pushed open. Candy, with a glow of happiness on her face walked quickly out onto the balcony and said excitedly, "Tom is waiting downstairs, we must go. Are you ready?" Sophie nodded and smiled at Candy, happy for her. "I'm ready, let's go."

Outside the building, a young man with a bouquet of flowers stood by the roadside waiting. Upon seeing Candy, he spread his arms in joy and the two embraced followed by a passionate kiss. Sophie looked at their sweet exchange, with both blessing and faint envy in her heart. But she quickly recovered her mood and followed them on to their way to the auditorium.

U. of C. Auditorium

As they stepped inside, the grandeur of the space overwhelmed Sophie. The walls were lined with intricately carved stonework and the ceilings were adorned with ornate frescoes depicting the history of Cordonia.

The stage was set at the far end of the hall, with a large, curved platform flanked by rows of velvet chairs.

The room was filled with the sounds of conversation and laughter, as hundreds of students and their families gathered for the event.

"There you are!" Maxwell exclaimed, as Sophie approached the group. "We were starting to wonder if you were going to miss the ceremony."

Sophie grinned. "No way. I wouldn't miss this for anything."

She reached out to give Maxwell a hug and was surprised to find that he was wearing a tuxedo. "I see you decided to dress up for the occasion," she said, amused.

"Yeah, mom insisted!"

Maxwell gestured to Daniel, who was dressed similarly in a tailored suit, his hair combed neatly. "Squirrel!" Daniel shouted as Bertrand and her uncle Barthelemy looked on in dismay.

***

As the graduation ceremony ended, the excitement in the auditorium grew as the lights dimmed, signaling the start of the post formal festivities.

The sound of the band started, and everyone's eyes were drawn to the stage behind the dance floor.

Above the dance floor the ceiling was covered with gold tassels and twinkling crystal lights which complemented the colorful balloons and streamers surrounding the parquet floor.

A spotlight illuminated the space where a young man stood in a white tuxedo, a microphone in his hand.

"Welcome, ladies and gentlemen," he began, his voice ringing out through the hall. "I am your host for this evening, and it is my great pleasure to welcome you all here to celebrate the graduating class of 2024."

There was a smattering of applause from the crowd. The host grinned. "It's time for the graduates to strut their stuff on the dance floor. Will all the students please take their places for the first dance."

Sophie laughed as she watched Maxwell and Daniel sashay arm in arm to the center.

Aunt Bethany gently tapped her shoulder. “Dear, your uncle, Bertrand, Sav and I are heading home. Have fun tonight.” Kissing her aunt’s cheek, Sophie turned her attention back to the dance.

“You guys can go dance then and I'll walk around.” Sophia smiled as she told Candy and Tom motioning towards the dance floor. Despite feeling a little lonely inside she wanted to give them some space to be alone.

“Okay, see you later Soph!” Candy and Tom smiled at each other and walked arm and arm into the dancing crowd. Looking at their backs Sophie took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Memories of her first dance with Liam flooded her thoughts, seeming to have just happened yesterday. What would happen if you were by your side tonight, Liam? Maybe he would gently take her hand and ask her to dance with him or maybe they would sneak out of the room and find a quiet corner to enjoy some alone time and sweet solitude. Sophie moved through the crowd alone, occasionally greeting acquaintances, but more often she just quietly observed everything and everyone around her.

That is when the mood at the party suddenly turned eerie. The lights began to flicker and then the whole venue was plunged into darkness. The sounds of people began to cry out as they looked for their companions. What is the matter - is there a power outage? Sophie mumbled to herself as she was about to take out her phone for light. But that was forgotten as she heard gunfire in the distance, which instantly destroyed all the peace and beauty of the evening.

“It's a shooting!” A frightened voice broke through the darkness as people started running and screaming wildly. Sophie's heart raced as she pressed against a wall trying to find a safe refuge as the emergency lights clicked on. Out of nowhere, Sophie felt a stinging pain on her cheek and forehead. She touched it with her hand and blood smeared on her fingertips having been cut in the face by shards of flying glass. Being surrounded by a chaotic crowd and the sounds of more gunfire, Sophie never felt more terrified and helpless than ever before.

Sophie looked through the flickering lights and saw strange figures flash through the window. Each of them was dressed in black and wore a black mask showing only their cold eyes. What was even more bizarre was the emblem on their chests. Each had been embroidered with a strange pattern. A picture of the earth with a baby was intertwined. It was unclear and strange who or what this referenced. Sophie took out her phone to film them but then another shot rang out close by which made her jump. In a panic the crowd rushed in her direction and in chaos her phone was flipped out of her hands by a fleeing person which flew several meters slamming into to the ground.

Regardless of the panic she felt at the moment, Sophie quickly took advantage of a few people moving out of her way to run and pick up her phone and placed it into her pocket, the screen smashed. The sound of her name being called brought Sophie's mind back to reality. She turned her head and saw that Tom had been shot in the shoulder in the confusion and his blood was red on the floor and down the front of his suit jacket. Candy was also cut in the arm by flying shrapnel and in pain, huddled on the ground beside Tom.

Sophie, ignoring the pain on her face, struggled to rush to them and used her whole-body strength to help the two people up amid all the chaos and despair. She found a glimmer of strength in the fear she felt for her friend and the thought of Liam. Grabbing a table napkin, recalling the first aid she had learned during her Girl Scouts years, she made emergency bandages for both of them. as she bandaged, she looked around from time to time looking for possible escape routes, but the smoke and the fire blurred her vision, and every step was full of unknown and danger.

Candy knelt down beside Tom and held him tight ignoring the pain on her arm. Her voice crying was pain and heartache Tom's face was pale as paper, but his eyes still flashed with the will to live. “Candy, sweetie ...” Tom struggled to lift his wounded hand and gently wiped the tears from Candy’s face and forced a smile, although his own gunshot wound to the shoulder had nearly knocked him unconscious.

“We have to get out of here, quick.” Sophie had just finished patching up Tom's shoulder and stood up. “Let's go that way ... there seems to be an exit.” She said pointing to a looming door not far away. Candy dried her tears, and she nodded. Together they supported Tom, struggling through confusion and fear, Sophie leads them through the sea of fire and debris.

Rome, Italy

A sleek, black limousine drove through the city, navigating the busy streets until it arrived at a five-star hotel located in the historical centre.

Liam sat inside the spacious interior, his gaze fixed out the window as the scenery rushed past them. His mind was preoccupied with thoughts of Sophie, her face, her smile. The memory of the softness of her skin, the gentle curves of her body beneath his touch. He was anxiously waiting for her response to his text.

He was going through the days events of the first day of his official business meetings he had today. It was a very productive and busy day of meetings with the prime minister of Italy, the minister for economy, the mayor of Rome and others to discuss international issues, economic growth and cultural exchanges between Cordonia and Italy.

But there was a part of him that wasn't fully focused on the job at hand. His initial plan for this Italian trip was to formally propose, to show his family and country that their future Queen was the most important person in his life.

He remembered seeing the display of jewelry at the Cartier store, he had a ring, a symbol of their commitment picked out for her. Now, inside his suit jacket, that diamond ring was nestled safely next to his heart.

Liam started to become tense and anxious that he didn't hear anything from Sophie.

Rashad watched from the other side of the vehicle with concern. He cleared his throat and broke the silence. "You alright, my boy?" He asked softly.

Liam shook his head and forced a half-hearted laugh. "Sorry...I've got a lot of things on my mind right now."

"Yes," Rashad replied. "A lot of big decisions on the horizon. So how'd today go, if I may ask? I wasn't there at the meeting of the prime minister. How was it?"

Liam straightened his posture and raised his chin.

"I think it went very well. I gave a very encouraging speech and I was able to make him agree with our position about our partnership between the two nations. That should help open more trade deals and increase exports to other countries, maybe even beyond the EU, like China or the UAE."

Rashad nodded proudly. "Excellent."

The two men continued their discussion as the limo wound its way through the city towards the luxury hotel. After a short drive, the vehicle drew up to the entrance.

Drake smiled at the luxury accommodation and turned to Liam. "And the hotel you're staying in is The Ritz, right?"

Liam raised an eyebrow in amusement.

"This is where I'm staying for the duration of the trip, but I did the preliminary negotiating with them before we left so my entourage could get the penthouse floor. But first, my friend," Liam chided playfully, "I have to make a statement for diplomacy purposes."

Liam emerged from the limo as the reporters and press begin flashing their cameras as paparazzi called out for his attention.

'Ecco qui, Nostrand alternative!'

["Over here, Your Highness!" ]

"Your Highness, do you have any comments for the press?"

"Can you tell us what the plans are for the Cordonian delegation while in the city?"

Liam looked at the cameras and responded.

'Il mio governo attende con ansia i nostri dibattiti su come promuovere la crescita economica e le opportunita per i nostri Paesi, affinche tutti i nostri cittadini possano.'

["My government looks forward to our discussions about promoting economic growth and opportunities for our countries, so that everyone in our citizens can prosper and enjoy the benefits of progress." ]

The gathered journalists cheered, and a member of the concierge team opened the door and led Liam, Rashad, Drake and Bastien into the opulent interior of the building.

Before entering the elevator, Liam paused and turned to Bastien. "i need you to locate Lady Sophia. I have been unable to contact her since leaving Cordonia."

"Right away, sir."

Thanks for reading; please let me know if you would like to be added or removed from this series.

📌perma tags: @bascmve01 @busywoman @kristinamae093 @differenttyphoonwerewolf @kingliam2019 @ao719 @alj4890 @emkay512 @karahalloway @twinkleallnight @malblk21 @tinkie1973 @queenmiarys @emersyn-in-cordonia @dutifullynuttywitch @charlotteg234 @lovingchoices14 @kyra75 @imjusthereforliam

📌 @selina012 @ @choicesficwriterscreations @irisk12 @walkerdrakewalker @delmissesryanandcassi @mom2000aggie @queen-arabella-of-cordonia @cadybear420 @thosehallowedhalls @moravel @prettyboisteveharrington @imashybish @jared2612

[divinebronzegoddess]

Grey Reflections: Episode 23—Unfair Advantage

If you would like to “Buy Me a Glass of Wine,” you can click this link or the ***DONATE*** link at the bottom of the menu on the left. All previous disclaimers apply. Episode 23—Unfair Advantage CHRISTIAN We all believe that we have just witnessed the latest evolution of Sophia Loren Taylor. I only saw the back of her—twice—looking down from a high vantage point, and she looked and sounded like a…

[idontthinkimokaymentally]

Hello there Sophia Taylor fans.

[nofuckingbody]

oh this is the album she wrote at the lakes where all the poets went to die

[hits-differently]

[stillgotscars]

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus - taylor swift

[lyricsbyts]

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus — t.s

[sheisobvious]

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus - Taylor Swift (2024) ♡

[ourstaturestouchtheskies]

cards from charlotte's art history tarot – major arcana // Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus – Taylor Swift

[jessmalia]

Foolish one, stop checking your mailbox for confessions of love that ain't never gonna come. You will learn the hard way instead of just walking out.

[hope-ur-ok]

the urge I had to name this track Chloe et al because I didn't want to type out the names (I am an inherently lazy person)

[clarabowmp3]

too impaired by my youth...to know what to do

[divinebronzegoddess]

Sophie and Shalane

Sophie and Shalane There are so many comments floating around about Sophie and Shalane that I had to dedicate a post simply to this topic. So, let’s talk about Sophie and Shalane. Let’s start with the many suggestions that I’ve seen that indicate that Sophie should go to court and tell the judge that she doesn’t want to see Shalane anymore. There are a lot of declarations that no judge in the…

[leona-hawthorne]

SELFISH / mattheo riddle

mattheo riddle x fem reader

summary: he dreams of you after you leave him because of his addiction

warnings: angst, addiction, drug use, swearing, mention of vomit (super brief), established relationship, mattheo and reader live together, post-war

words: 4.4k

a/n: i went to the melanie martinez concert yesterday! yay! anyways here’s a depressing fic for you <3 also i can’t lie, this was kind of inspired by that one line in chloe or sam or sophia or marcus by taylor swift (included at the end)

navigation mattheo riddle masterlist

The dim light of the kitchen amplified the feeling of darkness threatening to take over your soul as you sat perched on the counter, silk robe slipping off your shoulder. The sweet scent of fresh cookies flooded your nostrils each time you took a breath, the tray resting on top of the stove. An ice pack was pressed to the burn you’d just attained as you were taking the cookies out of the oven.

It seemed baking was one of your many ways of running from your problems instead of solving them.

Mattheo would be home soon. And unbeknownst to the poor boy, you were currently contemplating how to do it. How to leave him.

Maybe you should just leave now, before he returns. No fuss. Or maybe you could spend one more night in his loving arms and then leave a note on the fridge and quietly slip out at the first cracks of light. But that seemed cruel. You knew what you had to do. You had to tell him face to face. That’s what’s right, isn’t it?

If only it wasn’t so hard.

At heart, Mattheo Riddle was a selfish man.

He was selfish when you kissed him for the first time and he greedily pulled you back in. He was selfish the first time he saw you talking to another boy and got his knuckles bloody because you were supposed to be his only. He was selfish when you gave him your body for the first time and he ravished it from dusk to dawn. He was selfish when he continued to love you during the war, knowing his very being compromised your safety. And he was especially selfish when he didn’t flush the powder down the toilet each time after you washed him of his own fucking vomit. He was even more selfish because he didn’t want to let you go.

You were the light of his life, and as much as he wanted to tell himself that he didn’t know how he’d managed to snuff out your bright candle, that was a lie. With each action he took, with each time he ignored your teary eyes as he grabbed the bottle, there was a gust of wind blowing your once fiery spirit out. He felt as though a knife was being stabbed into his chest over and over and over again, piercing the tissue of his heart and breaking him down. He just couldn’t stop.

“Matty, please,” begging, your whispers would break apart, your voice trembling even in the quietest of tones. He’d shrink down to the floor with you, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead as your palm clamped over your mouth to silence your whimpers, his glazed eyes would look back to the drawer, unable to stop himself from walking to it.

Guilt, guilt, guilt. It was the only feeling he’d known for a long time now. Guilt, eating away at him as he stumbled home with dilated pupils, your beautiful soul straying from judgment and instead leaning his arm over your shoulder. Guilt, gnawing at his quivering fingers as they drew a new line of white, your muffled sobs leaking through the bathroom door. Guilt streaming down his cheeks in the form of tears as he held you in the aftermath, whispers of false promises that both of you knew were fake but wanted to believe anyway.

The sound of the front door creaking open shook you from your daze, furrowed brows relaxing and pulling your nails away from your teeth. You don’t move. You don’t get up to greet him. Even him walking through the door was a rocky road of memories for you. Sometimes, he’d come home with a smile and a kiss. Other times, he’d return with red eyes and arms that refused to hold onto you for help walking.

”Y/N?” His deep, tired voice called out.

”Kitchen.” You yelled, eventually hearing his footsteps approaching you. Still staring at the floor, you see his feet come into sight as he stands in front of you.

”You’re adorable, you know? Making my favorite cookies for when I get home.” He commented, giving you a lazy smile and a long kiss on the top of your head. “What happened to your finger?” He asked, concern filling his eyes as he saw the ice pack on your hand. You ignore his question.

With a shake of your head, you finally look up so your eyes meet his. “Um… Matt, baby, we need to talk.” Your voice is quiet as you contemplate which words to use. His face sours, lips curling downwards into a frown. “Okay…” He swallowed nervously.

You take a moment to really study your boyfriend’s face and lo and behold, his eyes are red. No surprise. Your expression doesn’t morph into shock or horror or concern. This is your usual now.

“What did you and Theo do today, Matt?” The question sounds innocent but Mattheo knows it is anything but.

“That’s what you wanted to talk about?” He chuckled nervously in an attempt to dodge your question.

”No, but I asked you a question.”

His head tilts down, staring at his feet embarrassedly, and after a long moment of silence, he answers. “You know.”

You huffed quietly, the sound a mixture of a bitter laugh and a scoff. “Yeah, I know… That’s actually what I wanted to talk about.”

His head snapped back up in an instant, eyes filling with fear that he desperately tried to cover up as his feet shifted around, the wooden floor creaking under him. You averted your eyes, unable to meet his fearful gaze as you just decided to be straightforward with it.

“I can’t watch this happen anymore, Mattheo.”

He stumbled back a bit, as if your words were a physical blow. “What?”

Swallowing the lump in your throat, you continue. “I’m done.” You got down from the kitchen counter to walk away but his hands were already grabbing at your arms. It was like his blood had turned to gasoline, your words the match. He’d been speechless for many moments, his brain going blank as your words settled in and became the only thing occupying his mind, bouncing around the corners of his skull with a groundbreaking echo. Anger, despair, and most of all, fear. Fear that he’d finally pushed you too far, that you were finally leaving. His hands grabbed at you in a desperate attempt to ground himself, to lock you to himself. “No, please—”

“Stop, Mattheo.” You mutter, your voice breaking. His hand froze, his heart clenching in his chest as your voice hit his ears. He hated the way you said his name. There was no love or warmth in it anymore. Just a cold, sharp edge.

“We can talk about this.” He pleaded, his voice becoming low and desperate. “Please, Y/N. Just let me explain.”

“This isn’t something we can fix with a fucking conversation, Mattheo. Not anymore.”

“We can try!” He insisted, his grip on your arm becoming a little firmer. He couldn’t bear the thought of losing you, and he wasn’t going to let you go without trying to fix this.

“Mattheo, we have tried.” You let out a broken sob.

“I know I messed up. And— and I’ll do better. I’ll stop, I’ll do anything.” He said, the desperation seeping into his voice. “Please, Y/N, I’m begging you.”

If it weren’t for the fact that you’d heard similar words leave his mouth many times before, you may have broken and given in.

“That’s not how that works and you know it.” You utter quietly, teary eyes darting back up to his.

He swallowed, suddenly feeling a mixture of anger and hurt wash over him. “You’re not even willing to fix it.” He spat, his grip on your arm tightening.

He hated the way you spoke to him, like it was so easy for you to walk away. It tore his heart out of his chest. “You don’t get to act like you’re better than me, because you’re not. You’re just a coward, running away instead of facing this like an adult.”

With a sniffle, you bit your tongue and said, “Maybe. But I can’t take this anymore, so I don’t care.”

He flinched at your words, the pain stabbing at his heart as he realized that to you, it was that simple. A part of him wanted to say something more, to convince you to stay, but he knew he couldn't do anything to change your mind. He didn’t deserve for you to change your mind.

And so, with a frustrated, heartbroken glare into your eyes, he abruptly took a few steps back away from you, the walls he’d spent ages lowering for you closing back up, the years worth of trust and progress shattering within an instant.

“Fine. Go ahead. Run away. See if I care.”

You swallowed and walked to your guys’ shared bedroom to pack your things, hoping the walls are thick enough to muffle your sobs.

He watched you walk away, feeling like a dagger was plunging deeper and deeper into his heart with every step you took. He wanted to run after you, to hold you in his arms right then and there and sink down to the living room floor with you, but the cold reality of everything that had happened hit him, and he stayed rooted in his spot, unable to move.

Sitting against the gray wall, he couldn’t even look at you as you walked out the door with your bags clutched in your shaking hands. After you left, he sat there for what felt like hours. He couldn’t move, couldn’t think. His mind was filled with an overwhelming mix of anger, resentment, betrayal, but most of all, an excruciating amount of just simple childlike sadness. It felt as if his heart had been ripped out of his chest.

And hours later, still in the same dumbstruck position, in the hazy depths of his mind, he could swear he heard your pretty voice, felt your gentle fingers tracing the outline of his face as they’d done so many times before.

Finally, he decided that he needed to do something, anything to distract himself from the painful emptiness. So he did the only thing he knew how: he went to the white nightstand beside what used to be the both of yours’ bed to take out the one thing he knew would quiet his pounding head.

His fingers brushed against the bottle, and his heart leaped as he recognized the familiar feel of its cylindrical shape. He pulled it out, his eyes widening with relief as he held the bottle in his hands. It felt as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He hastily opened the bottle as he walked towards the door leaned against it.

Soon enough, a sudden lightheadedness washed over him, and he sat there for a moment, enjoying the light fuzzy feeling inside his head. It helped to erase all the terrible thoughts that were plaguing his mind, making him feel like he was floating. He reached for another pill, but as he was about to take it, a voice at the back of his head started scolding him.

“What are you doing?”

He flinched as he heard the voice in his mind, his hands still clutching the bottle. He looked around, even though it was clear that the voice wasn’t coming from anywhere in his room. He tried to ignore it, shaking his head and popping another pill into his mouth.

But the voice didn’t go away. It grew louder, demanding he listen to it.

“Stop!”

He began to recognize the voice as yours.

He let out a frustrated groan, rolling his eyes at the voice. “Please shut up, I need this right now!”

But the voice kept echoing through his head. “But Mattheo, you’re hurting yourself. You’re hurting me. Don’t do this to us.”

Jesus, had he really gone so crazy to the point that he started hearing voices and talking to himself in an empty room?

Reluctantly, he laid the bottle back down beside him.

“Good job, pretty baby. Go drink some water.” Your voice murmured in the back of his head.

He felt a pang in his heart at the way you spoke to him. He missed having your hand gently soothing his cheek, your soft kisses planted on his skin. He missed you, even though he was trying his best not to, to just be mad. Hearing your voice in his head, so soft and gentle, was making him crave you even more.

He sniffled loudly, blinking away his tears before they could fall. He couldn’t help but obey.

Without wasting another second, he stood up and huddled off to the kitchen to pour himself a glass of water. As the cold liquid flowed down his throat, he couldn’t help but feel like you were there with him. He could almost imagine you standing beside him, softly stroking his hair like you had done countless times before.

Sauntering back to the bedroom with his eyes glazed over, he laid back down in the bed, pulling the quilt over his body. The fact that it was riddled with your scent didn’t help to soothe his aching chest. A tired, defeated sigh escaped his lips as he sunk into the soft mattress. His body felt heavy and fatigue washed over him, making it increasingly hard to keep his eyes open. He couldn’t help but wish it was you beside him instead of your pillow, your body pressed against his like it usually was every night.

Just as he was about to close his eyes, the voice spoke up again. “Go to sleep, my love. I’ll watch over you.”

His eyes snapped open and he sat up a bit straighter, his heart racing. God, you’re not really here, are you? You can’t be.

He shook his head, trying to convince himself that it was just his mind playing tricks on him. But the voice continued, growing even more fond.

“Relax, darling. Don’t overthink it. Just rest and I’ll see you in your dreams.”

Your voice in his head was so gentle, a soothing balm over the wound in his heart. He hesitated for a few moments before laying back down. He let out a soft sigh and closed his eyes, allowing himself to drift off into a deep sleep.

But before he lost himself to the dream world, he could have sworn that he felt a gentle pair of lips grazing over his face.

In his dream, he found himself in a beautiful garden, surrounded by bright, colorful flowers. The air was filled with the sweet, fruity scents, and the warm sunlight danced on his skin softly. He stood there, taking a moment to drink in the beauty of his surroundings, before seeing a familiar figure in the distance.

You were walking towards him, dressed in a simple sundress. Your hair gently moved with the wind, and your eyes shimmered under the sunlight, resembling a star in the night sky. You were gorgeous, more beautiful than any flower in the garden.

He couldn’t help but smile as you approached him. He reached out for you, wanting to touch you and see if you were real. But as soon as his fingers brushed against your skin, you vanished, leaving him standing alone in the garden, all silent except for the sound of the gentle breeze.

His heart sank with confusion and disappointment as he realized he was alone again. He let out a frustrated scoff, kicking the grass as he began to look around the garden for you. Finally, he spotted you again, standing under an elegant archway.

He quickly closed the distance between the two of you, his hands reaching up to cup your face. He was relieved that he could touch you again. He softly caressed your cheeks, staring into your eyes with admiration. “I missed you so much,” he whispered, his voice filled with longing.

But before he could say anything else, you vanished once again. He gritted his teeth, frustration bubbling within him as he yelled out your name. He began desperately running around the garden, searching every corner until he spotted you sitting under a cherry blossom tree.

His heart leaped in his chest as he ran towards you, but as soon as he reached the tree, you disappeared once more. He felt his frustration reach its peak and he let out a groan of annoyance, his fists clenching as he yelled angrily.

“Stop disappearing on me! Let me hold you, damn it!”

Just as he was about to give up hope, he suddenly noticed you standing behind him. You were smiling, a kind and loving smile gracing your lips as you said, “Catch me if you can, pretty boy.”

His eyes widened as soon as he heard your voice. He slowly turned around to face you, his heart thumping rapidly as he realized you had really appeared. He reached out to grab you, but just as he was about to wrap his arms around your waist, you suddenly sprinted off, your laughter filling the air.

Despite the initial shock, he broke out into a huge, boyish grin. Without hesitation, he began chasing after you. He was laughing, feeling more alive than he had in weeks. As time flew by, the two of you ran through the flower garden, chasing each other like little children.

Finally, after a long chase, he managed to catch you. He pulled you close, wrapping his strong arms tightly around your body. He let out a satisfied laugh, his eyes filled with warmth and affection as he whispered, “Got you now.”

His heart swelled with happiness as you wrapped your arms around him too, your body pressed securely against his. He buried his face into your hair and breathed in your scent, feeling overwhelmed with contentment.

He let out a gentle sigh before pulling away just enough so he could look down at your face. He placed a soft kiss on your forehead before murmuring, “I love you, darling.”

You pulled away slightly to look into his eyes, mirroring his look of contentment. “I love you too, beautiful boy,” you whispered as you gently caressed his cheek. He closed his eyes and leaned into your touch, relishing the feeling of your fingertips against his skin.

But when he opened his eyes, he was met with the image of your figure fading away, a startled gasp escaping him. “No! Come back!” He called out, but you were gone. He frantically looked around the garden, only to find that he was alone once more. He felt your absence like a physical ache, and a sense of longing washed over him.

He stood there, his heart feeling heavy and lonely as he whispered your name, hoping for you to come back. But there was no sign of you, no response to his calls. He sank down onto the grass, feeling lost and desperate. The sun continued to shine, almost as if mocking him and his misery.

He wrapped his arms around himself, trying to regain a sense of comfort, but it wasn't the same. He missed you, longed for your presence. He couldn't bear being alone anymore. The garden around him, which had been so beautiful and filled with life, now seemed empty and boring without you.

He closed his eyes as he lay flat on the ground. Suddenly he felt a kiss on his cheek. His eyes snapped open to see you standing above him with a teasing smile.

A mix of disbelief and happiness washed over him as he saw you standing there, a playful smile gracing your lips. He sat up straight, looking up at you with a mixture of relief and confusion. “You’re back,” he whispered, as if he couldn’t quite believe it.

“What do you mean? I never went anywhere?…” Your voice echoes through the garden as you tilt your head in confusion, looking down at him.

He furrowed his brows, a bit confused by your answer. He looked around at the garden, which was now eerily quiet, then back at you. “But you disappeared. I was chasing you and you vanished.”

“Don’t be silly. I’ve been here the whole time.” You giggled, toying with the straps of your dress.

The confusion in his eyes only deepened as he listened to your words. He was starting to feel a bit disoriented, like he was stuck in a twisted dream. “No, you weren’t,” he insisted. “I lost sight of you for a moment, and then I couldn’t find you anywhere.”

“Oh, beautiful boy. Are you seeing things again?” Your gentle voice echoed throughout the open field.

As he heard the echo of your voice, he felt a pang in his chest. There was something amiss, something that didn’t feel right. “I don’t understand… Are you really here, or is this just my imagination?” he asked, his voice filled with a hint of desperation.

“I’m whatever you want me to be,” You murmured, looking out at the swaying flowers with an innocent smile.

Frustration started to bubble up in him as he heard your ambiguous answer. “That’s not an answer. I need to know if you’re really here or if you’re just a figment of my imagination.” He stood up from the ground and stepped closer to you, his eyes fixed on your face, searching for any signs of truth in your expressions.

Your innocent smile morphed into a playful smirk, angling your head up to look at him. “Catch me,” You say before running again.

He watched you run away, a mix of frustration and determination now etched on his face. He let out a huff and began chasing after you once more. He was tired of feeling powerless and confused, and he was determined to catch you this time.

As he ran through the garden, the flowers of different colors and shapes passed him in a colorful blur. He pushed himself harder, ignoring the occasional thorns and leaves that clawed at his skin. His focus was solely on you, his eyes locked onto your figure as you darted through the garden.

He tried to strategize as he ran, trying to anticipate your next move. You were nimble and elusive, like a butterfly fluttering just out of reach. But he refused to give up. He zigzagged through the garden, trying to cut you off. He was getting closer, he was sure of it.

Finally, he saw an opportunity to cut you off as you headed towards a narrow path between two rows of tall bushes. He pushed himself to sprint even faster and managed to get in front of you, blocking your escape route.

He stood there in front of you, panting heavily from the chase. His chest was heaving, his eyes locked onto yours. “Caught you, darling,” he said breathlessly, a hint of triumph in his voice.

“Come back to me, Mattheo,” You whispered.

The sound of your voice was like a bandage to his tired soul. He stepped closer, closing the gap between them. He reached out and gently took your hands in his, his fingers intertwined with yours. "I'm right here, darling," he whispered back.

“No… You’re not. This isn’t real.”

He furrowed his brows, confusion and a tinge of hurt evident on his face. "What do you mean? Of course, this is real. We're here together, talking, touching. How can it not be real?”

He looked down at your intertwined fingers and lightly brushed his thumb over your knuckles, as if trying to convince himself of your tangible existence. "I can feel you," he murmured. "I can feel your skin against mine. How can that be unreal?"

He lifted one of your hands to his chest, placing it over his heart. It was hammering against his ribcage, his pulse strong and steady. "Can you feel that?" he asked quietly. "Can you feel my heartbeat? That's real. I'm real."

“No, you’re not, sweet boy,” You whisper, your body slowly fading away.

His eyes widened in alarm as he watched your form start to disappear once again. "No, no, no, no, you can't leave me!" He clutched at your hand tightly, unwilling to let you go. "No, you must be real. You have to be!" Panic and despair welled up inside him as he saw your body fading. He gripped tighter onto your hand, desperately trying to keep you with him. "Please, don't disappear," he pleaded, his voice trembling. "I need you. Don't leave me alone again."

“Wake up,” is the last thing you whisper before disappearing from his grasp.

His eyes snapped open, and he jolted upright in his bed. He was bathed in sweat, his heart racing and his breaths coming out in pants. He sat there for a moment, disoriented and confused. It had all felt so real, yet now he was back in his cold, empty room.

He raked a hand through his messy hair, raking his mind over the dream he had just had, searching for answers.

He couldn't shake the feeling of melancholy that had settled over him. He could still remember the way you had felt in his arms, the warmth of your touch and the sweet melody of your voice. He could still see your captivating smile and the sparkle in your eyes. But it was all just a dream.

He ran a hand over his face, feeling both physically and emotionally exhausted. He looked around at his room, which now seemed even more hollow without your presence. He let out a deep sigh, feeling more lonely and empty than ever.

It was clear he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep in the bed you once shared so he ambled back to the kitchen sleepily and grabbed one of the cookies you’d left in one hand, a bottle in the other, chugging it with no reaction to the sting.

Stumbling to the sofa and collapsing down, now with his system in overdrive, he couldn’t help but selfishly hope you’d come back and save him from falling deeper into oblivion.

But he knew you wouldn’t and most painfully of all, he knew that he deserved it.

You needed me but you needed drugs more and I couldn’t watch it happen

I changed into goddesses, villains, and fools

Changed plans and lovers and outfits and rules

All to outrun my desertion of you

And you just watched it

If you wanna break my cold, cold heart, just say “I loved you the way that you were”

If you wanna tear my world apart, just say you’ve always wondered

— Taylor Swift

[ilostyou]

CHLOE ET AL 😭😭😭😭😭😭

[stillgotscars]

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus - taylor swift