#So I went with my most recent read
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@staringamassivemistakeintheface
And then Joe Hills wrote a poem that killed all the Vogons.
#Tumblr really didn't want me to post this one goddamn#anyways I couldn't think of any books I've read recently I'm like dumb#So I went with my most recent read#which was the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series#Could have gone much more chaotic but I'm a coward lol#Xisuma void#Rendog#goodtimeswithscar#Marvin (the depressed robot)#zaphod beeblebrox#I've got zero clue how to draw this two-headed man-#Request#shitty doodles#ArTev
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What led to this (orufrey comic, cw an uncomfortable/creepy scene)
#witch hat tag#orufrey#er.... i'm too tired to have anything to say..i worked several days on this.#wait.. didn't i say just recently here that i probably wouldn't ever depict 'what if alaira is qifrey's sort-of ex'. What's going on#i don't even remember deciding to draw this..it's all a blur..i'm not sure why i WOULD decide to draw delicate scenes in my head#that i wouldn't really want to share with anyone/discuss so why did i draw it...#some part of me really really wants to draw things that are more and more true to myself...#maybe because of my alienation with most romance/shipping/dynamics the rest of the world depicts.#orufrey really is perfectly suited to me - what i read in the text and what is in my head. well anyway#i am TIRED of drawing poses and angles and..maybe now i will actually take a break from drawing bc of the tediousness of Angles#btw it really is a 'stretch of time' . . . assuming witches graduate age 18-20#well orufrey are canonically 30-ish. they've only had agott around for presumably about TWO years (?) bc she took the test age 10#and it feels like oru moving in/unknown atelier acquisition/building (?) .. i guess that could be a year or so before agott at most#(she was the first disciple) so... ????????? What about the other 7 or so years ?!?!?!!?!?! Unemployed Brimhat Hatred era#that time is very nebulous. after qifrey went to the tower i feel like it's been implied he and oru drifted apart a little.#certainly they didn't live together at first... no way. that doesn't feel like how it is based on things oru has said about becoming Eye#idk. I'm tired now. i don't usually think of alaira as necessarily qifrey's ex and this being how things went in that 'sliver of time'.#i usually prefer the idea that they have their first kiss with each other in their 30s cause That's Just The Orufrey Lifestyle#just felt like making a more relatable alternative view of my own Cai Orufrey Canon one time. btw im a big monoshipper and it hurt a bit#let's leave it there. this is surely the most i've worked on a 'single' art - though now i realise just how much longer the fic took :')
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You're telling me that I wasted 15 years not reading this book and instead, middleschool-me went and read the matched and divergent series?? WHEN THERE IS THEM?
#thg#the hunger games#katniss everdeen#peeta mellark#everlark#myart#designs super inspired by c-kiddo i really didnt wanna picture jennifer lawrence as katniss lmaooooo#josh hutcherson... you can stay#anyway i just recently finished the first book of the trilogy#im so mad that THIS was the series 12 year old me decided to dodge#and then went and read the most disappointing (/neg) dystopian trilogies in my life#peeta and katniss are everything to me now. i think about them all the time
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y'all go from being feminists to tearing these women down within seconds oh my god it's 2024 can we please stop viciously tearing one woman down to bring another up i don't care what side you take but saying vile shit about either woman and their music is disgusting, please grow up
#seperate the art from the artist please oh my god#for the record i like both billie and taylor#the variants being a major thing but i know thats not to hurt billie like yall say its it's to get more money (which she doesn't need????)#like let people have opinions oh my god its not that deep#and some of yall (not naming names yk who you are) went from loving billies new album to saying the most vile shit within a second which is#+shallow as fuck please learn to separate the art from the artist#you're allowed to dislike someones music but dragging them down as a person is shameful and not something to be proud of#and some of the shit ive seen said recently is disgusting please think before you speak#and ill be honest the swifties are saying most of the horrible stuff#i love taylor as much as you guys but it is not an excuse to say disgusting shit about other women please find something better to do+#+with your time#most of my mutuals are swifties but tbh if youre offended by me saying not to drag women down then i don't want you following me anyways#luc posts#billie eilish#taylor swift#i will not rant about my hatred for the variants and consumerism thats a post for another day#also have yall considered that this whole argument thing is pr so they can both get more streams. bc uh that was my first thought ngl#edit like 10 minutes later: i read an article and yall are blowing shit out of proportion it is literally not that deep omg
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I can't believe trump is winning the elections...
#like... for real?#I was reading about a woman pregnant with twins in texas#who needed a selective reduction i.e. to abort one twin#because he wasn't going to survive#and the doctors went 'no we can't do that'#which meant they would ALL die. both twins and their mom#she managed to get the abortion done out of texas but like#how insane is this??#it drives me mad#I'm worried about the anti-abortion stance spreading#I mean it's not like it's not already there in europe#see Ireland until recently. see Italy#where abortion is legal on paper but doctors can still refuse to perform it#on religious grounds#which is INSANE. insane#omg I was discussing it with my aunt ages ago and I was like#they shouldn't have that option#and she went 'oh so you think doctors should be forced to perform abortions'#NO I think if you don't want to perform abortions don't become a fucking gyno?? maybe??#did they point a gun to their head?? aren't there lots of other specialties they could've gone for??#like what am I missing here. help#it's not even about religion though for most which makes it even more infuriating#oh I went off on a tangent here. sorry#reproductive rights#us politics#donald trump
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there is so much horror that comes with being marty mcfly.
in one night he sees his best friend get shot down and die in front of him. then when he tries to get help for him he’s blasted back thirty years and is like instantly shot at. he ends up fucking with his family history by getting hit by a car and his own mother falling for him. the only man who can help him shuts him out at first because he doesn’t know him yet. marty must’ve been terrified to be stuck in a nightmare of a life and scared doc would be gone from his life in more ways than one. if doc hadn’t told him about how he made the flux capacitor that very night and had gone back to the exact day doc came up with it he never could’ve gone back. but even with docs help he has a week to force his parents together and needs to time the delorean to get powered by the lightning PERFECTLY! not to mention how he starts fading from existence on stage and just barely survives. (and that’s only the first movie)
the boy almost dies so many times within the span of a few weeks!!! it’s just a little over a few weeks that he’s jumping through time to try and not die and not lose doc and his universe. he’s shot at so much, jumps off a building, is almost hanged, hit by cars and barely avoids being hit by a car, is locked in a trunk, AND ALMOST FADES FROM EXISTENCE!!! (absolutely forgetting some things because it’s been a bit since i’ve seen the sequels) throughout all of this he’s barely getting rest and is in near constant stress. if he messes up even a little, either he’s dead or someone he loves. marty is still seventeen and has gone through more than any adult ever should. he has so much he needs to work through but who would even believe him besides doc and jen?
marty can never go home. everyone he knew is gone and now he’s in the shoes of a boy he doesn’t know. he has to be the boy that everyone around him knows and not the actual guy he is. his home is gone and marty is all that’s left. his house is full of strangers that don’t know their son is gone and that marty is in his place. even if his home life is better now there is not really a way for him to get back what he lost. he’ll remember it for the rest of his life (unless we have the fun idea that his memories are slowly rewritten to fit the current timeline. but THEN we have to deal with the horror of knowing your memories are going away and being replaced and you can’t do anything to stop it and someday everything you knew is gone and you’re a whole other person).
and don’t forget about the people around marty. the twin pines mcfly family has lost their son forever. we don’t know if another marty ever comes home, but it still won’t be their son. if no marty ever comes then he’ll never come home and they’ll never see him again. he’ll be missing or presumed dead. to them he just went to bed one night and was gone. that combined with docs death and knowing he was close with him wouldn’t seem like great odds. jen will have lost her boyfriend and can never see him again. nobody will ever know what happened to him or where he went. and if someone like lone pines marty ended up in the twin pines timeline somehow it would still be just as tragic. his good homelife is ripped away and doc could still be dead.
his parents don’t have their son anymore, doc won’t have his friend anymore, jen won’t have her boyfriend anymore, but they have a stranger in his place playing the part until he adapts to the timeline. he’ll act off for a while and they won’t know why since they don’t know the horrors he’s gone through in the past two or three weeks. and jennifer finds out about time travel later and marty would probably tell her about everything and letting her know he’s not the same guy. what could she even think? she loves marty, she always will, but something about knowing the man you loved is gone (even if there’s another marty in his place) is still awful to think about.
it would be so strange for doc too. when he first meets marty (in lone pines marty’s life) he’s met him before but also hasn’t. he met twin pines marty thirty years ago and is now meeting a slightly different boy thirty years in the future. he can’t act like he knows him because that could fuck with the timeline. he has to pretend he’s never met him and never missed him so that the timeline can continue smoothly.
i’m including the video game because i want to. marty is barely older and doc has been gone for a whole six months. he loses his best friend for months and then docs stuff is being sold since he’s presumed dead. then the delorean shows up and aparently he’s dead again, putting marty in the position where he needs to save doc yet again. he gets attacked and is almost shot (again) and is held at gunpoint. then when all seems safe and they’re heading home he starts to disappear again. i can’t stress how horrible it would be to see yourself being erased in front of your own eyes, your flesh fading from this timeline and barely holding you together.
episode three of the game has always stuck with me for how frightening it would be to see your best friend fade from existence and you end up in a hellish timeline where you never knew him. he crashes into a billboard (the amount of head trauma is another big thing he goes through) and jen is the only one who can get him down but she hates him. marty’s two friends, the closest people to him either hate his guts or doesn’t even know who he is. he truly loses everything in that timeline. the delorean is wrecked yet again and hill valley is some dystopia disguised as a utopia. the man who helped marty through everything is gone and doesn’t even want to see him, dogs are fucking banned from town so einstein (the most helpful guy in the game istg you couldn’t do it without him) is also gone, and the smallest things can get him in trouble. he can’t even give jen a quick kiss without being given a lot of demerits.
of course he gets out, but he leaves with citizen brown, not doc. citizen brown is forcing emmet to be what he wants and is endangering everything for marty. it gets to the point where marty has to almost suffocate emmet so citizen brown finally gives in and emmet gets away. and even though citizen brown was not doc, he still kind of was to marty. when the timeline is fixed yet again citizen brown fades from existence right in front of marty’s eyes but not before getting hit by a car to save marty. he stays there beside him in his final moments nearly crying and holding his hand desperately trying to assure doc he’ll get him to a hospital and that he’ll be fine before he eventually fades fully. even though citizen brown doc caused so much trouble for marty, he was still doc. his friend. and he lost him again. (until a different doc comes back for marty but he still has seen the death of his best friend WAY too many times)
TL;DR marty will never have his life back and no therapist can help him <3
#moxxtalks#back to the future#marty mcfly#doc brown#jennifer parker#george mcfly#lorraine baines mcfly#long post#this is so long i'm sorry#i can't put my thoughts into something pleasant to read so bear with me#thinking about back to the future too long makes me severely unwell#i left out stuff like most of the second and third movie bc i haven't seen them recently enough to speak confidently on it#also left out a fair bit of the game because i just forgot some of it and haven't played episodes four and five recently#if i got some stuff wrong or went against the rules of the series i'm sorry#it'll probably happen again unintentionally
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you ever just. become overwhelmed by a sudden out-of-nowhere wave of tenderness and affection and longing for reconnection directed towards someone to whom you no longer speak for Very Good Reasons
#‘out of nowhere’ she says like she hasn’t been doing a lot of reading/thinking recently about various tragic messy breakups#and the later regrets of the parties involved#anyway. tell me not to text her#it’s been over two years since the last time we talked… absolutely no reason to break that streak now. lord give me strength#she was really fucking mean to me! like objectively intentionally unwarrantedly cruel! it ruined an entire year of my life#and fundamentally changed me as a person on a deep level! there’s a lot of things i used to like about myself that i don’t think i’m ever#going to get back#and yet every once in a while we have to do the whole ‘maybe i could make things right’ song and dance 😔#the thing is most of the time i’m not even really angry with her anymore like enough time has passed since all the shit went down that#really i just sort of look at her behavior and feel sad. both because of the impact on me but also because of the ‘that’s really how you#felt you needed to act towards someone who cared about you? you couldn’t have just expressed your feelings in an honest and productive way#instead of just lashing out in the cruelest possible way and ruining the entire relationship beyond hope of repair?’#and i feel bad and sorry that it went that way and honestly i kind of pity her and hope she’s gotten some of her shit worked out#so i’m not like. actively pissed off at her anymore. but also i can’t think about her without thinking about the worst year of my life so 🙃#i don’t actually feel that trying to reopen that door would be very healthy for me at least#we did try a Reconciliation of sorts a couple of months after the initial falling-out and while it was kind of helpful for me in that she#like. apologized lmao. and affirmed that i wasn’t crazy and she did in fact On Purpose say the most hurtful things she possibly could have#said to me given the information she had at her disposal. and that i really had not done anything to her that could warrant that. etc.#it also left a sour enough taste in my mouth that i just don’t see a future where the two of us spending time together is enjoyable for me#and yet… the regret will always live inside me i think. maybe if i were a stronger person…#caseyposting
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truly fascinating phenomenon i've noticed as i've been more active on ao3 than i have been in like 4 years where an author will write the most fascinating and in-character thing that explores a lot of interesting facets of characters and their relationships and then when you go on their account you find out that most of their stuff is like very much out-of-character or just plain bizarre and it's like wow how did you do that .. i know you can do better i have seen it ... just very interesting
#i can't say this because i am very scared this is how my writing comes off.#anyway read a very good relationship study and then when i went to the author's page the most recent thing was so silly because#well they would not do that at all!#txt
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robot/android named Axis that gets tossed out by his creator (Dr.X) on day 1 for being glitched, ends up in the trash heap, was meant to be deactivated but for some reason (possible meteorite in the trash heap?) he reactivated.
ends up in the middle of a town, finds out that Dr. X frequently sends x-bots to attack to try and take over, said attacks are usually felled by humans or z-bots.
Axis figures that there's probably a stigma around the letter x in general and so when asked for his name starts going by "Access" instead.
part of the identifying x-mark on him got damaged/smudged when he was tossed, so the people/person that finds him assume he's a y-model bot, an old prototype model that hasn't been used in ages. (a y-bot shouldn't have been this advanced, but yknow they're still finding out more about the robot testing sites so it's not that far out of the realm of possibility).
somehow, Access ends up fighting off x-bots, and kinda accidentally becomes like, a town hero??
...basically the plot here is that Access has to protect this town while hiding the fact that he's actually an x-model bot while also hiding that he's glitched. shenanigans ensue.
#original story ideas#I GUESS??? IDK??#ive been thinking about this all day#because.#....well#i watched a megaman cartoon and was so disappointed by it i went ''fuck this im making my own robot show now''#and now here i am#why did i pick the letter X you ask??? well... because the letter X has just had such a bad vibe recently....#who knows why....#also if i had to pick a name for this concept it'd be Glitched but it's spelt like Glitxed.#like. the logo would definitely read Glitched but the ''ch'' is overlapped with an X#My OCs#tagging that so i can find this again when i inevitably forget most of the details
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looking @ old fic i started when i was 14/15 is so funny bc im realizing once again why i never mark fics as abandoned even if its been literal years since i've touched them. specifically i was checking docs for stuff i started and either did or didn't post to ffn.
and its like. nothing is bad??? like i can see where my outside-the-box ideal of fic writing comes from. not just fics but writing in general, i'm p sure. even if it's a total cliche plot setup, there are details on each that rly make it stand out like oh yeahhhhhh i did have this great idea once upon a time.
funny too bc was it executed well in prose??? no absolutely not i wrote like shit when i was 15. would i revive an idea one day and revise it to be less cliche or cringy while still keeping the stand-out elements??? yea maybe. i might. everything i'm currently working on that i started from 2021 up to now still holds my supreme interest, but like i'm not gonna say never.
esp since i write fic first and foremost for my own need and specifically what i like to read, it makes it impossible to consider an idea i've thought extensively about "not worth writing anymore". anyway not making this too long i jus found everything interesting to consider
#writing#this fic i pulled up from JUNE 2014 crazy was the old chosenshi au i was trying to write for a friend#i dont ship blue/silver and never will and thats prolly why i never finished it#but i do still like!! the idea of rocket!blue raised w silver and breaking free of tr while running the hoenn branch#no idea how i remembered bc it wasnt in the plot pts on the doc but she was gonna get sent to the battle frontier#to nab jirachi and have encounters w frontier brains and change her mind at the end of it all#hell i could go back and not make it ship fic at all - have silver be a little one-sided obsessed or#even jus like.. attached to blue as a rivalry like as a way to show her up at every turn#another fic around the same time was the old pokespe hs au where i changed all the dexholder's names for some reason#i have no idea where i was in reading spe bc i put lyra in for some reason and had the sinnoh trio even tho i never read past v2 of dp#idk if it was more gameverse or what but its so funny looking @ the ship list n seeing i had gold paired w black#bc i had manga!ss and manga!ferriswheel so was it rly speverse or was i projecting????#actually i think black was supposed to die and gold was gonna go thru this whole thing abt grieving#looking at the ship list so funny bc i never shipped gold/crys or entourageshi#and clearly i did not know the superiority of pmshi if i threw lyra in jus for silver#god but i do love (most!) of the alt names i gave them#would absolutely fuck up the ship list if i ever redid it tho#also have perfectworld tho im sure i have the most recent rewrite on pen and paper somewhere#that one i also gave up bc the idea i had for flare!sycamore was cringe along with#every time i went back to work on it enough time passed that i thought my writing sucked#i rewrote that damn thing so many times but oooooooo i still love the idea#as long as i changed the cringe parts to smth better i could still rock w most of these#that fic rly had everything... psychic!korrina. leaf/serena. sycamore hacking the secret to mega evo. lys/syc that ends in failure#bc of the ending line i will never forget > only in a perfect world could you and i be together. destined and doomed from the start#im rambling n im boutta run outta tags gimme a sec
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I need Americans that were never Christian™️ to realize that the average conservative cult christian's thoughts are basically that one episode of Spongebob where he gets elected Hall Monitor and gives a speech with "Crime and Punishment. Punishment and Crime"
#christians see themselves as the hall monitors of the earth essentially#and everyone needs to be punished and have their good noodle stars taken else they'll commit arson#they genuinely believe that as soon as you stop policing people they'll delve into their deepest darkest fantasies and start committing sins#that even Jesus Christ himself didn't think of#they come from the idea that they are the only group capable of keeping things steady until Sky Papa can make his way down and fuck shit up#So when you do something bad it's because you fell into the pull of destruction#But when they do it's the equivalent of stepping on your dog's foot because they almost tripped you#I still think it's funny a bunch of christians are creationist tho lmao skill issue#My grandparents are but my dad isn't#he believes evolution essentially occurred over the same time the earth was being created#and the story of adam being made from dust was a metaphor and literal#he was made from dust made from decomposing animals and plants which he used to create us as a more perfect being#so now we continue to evolve because we're connected to the dust and can continue to try to improve#so my dad believes in evolution and went to college for biology and chemistry at the biggest HBCU in the US#That evolution/creationist tangent was completely unrelated but all twitter is for me rn is ppl freaking out about our rights being taken#I avoid twitter most of the time but like to look at my friends' and fav artists' tweets#and recently I think little joel made a video about the evolution video that was trending so yea#n e ways have a nice day y'all <3#I've been wanting to make more hehe hahas but everything in my brain rn is Undergraduate Thesis level shit#so I haven't really been reading or writing things I can talk about on Tumblr.Com ya know?#most of it is sociological textbooks memoirs and similar stuff that Id feel talking about on my casual blog#maybe Ill make a blog. like Blog blog for my essays one day#ex christian#religious trauma
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*turns up brightness a bit to read muatals post*
*proceeds to creep back to ao3 to keep reading*
*BLINDNESS*
#rambles#this is unnameds most recent post which had a dark background and black text#so i turned up my brightness just a bit to read it and went huh oke#then opened a03 and got freakin blinded cause it was quite bright
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Just remembered an ask I sent (cries) right after V8 finished airing where I pointed out we'd probably see Pyrrha in V9 because Achilles is met in the underworld by Odysseus. Can't figure out if I were right because of allusion reading or right because they thought they'd add her back in again to stir fandom drama. Could be both.
I did like the implementation though as a vision to psychologically torture Ruby (Achilles is very unhappy in the underworld) and in a somewhat similar case Jaune. Yippeeee
#been having a days-long argument with myself about the broader nature of this topic so it's on my mind#*cries because I'm a hermit now. it's just the way it has to be#I promise you I am not going to list off every single time I was right... trying to get a feeling for what “esoterica” gets employed or not#and remembering that I speculated on that so early was pretty cool#times I was wrong? depending on whether I ignored my gut and went along with the fandom (quit the show at the end of V5)#vs. gut feeling/analytic reading... let me think#ah yeah most recently I really thought adam/summer/penny were going to be a crossover topic in V9; that felt wise to group#“hard choices” potentially also forced human killings#depending on what exactly went down with raven and summer. I feel like yang intellectualises killing adam through the same lense#raven did the first spring maiden; it had to be done#and yang is probably right but her shadow hmm that's the sublimated feeling of shame
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finally watching twisters (2024) only reinforces my theory that I would be the first to die in a tornado
#Rachel in real life#like in my most recent experience#I was so happy reading my shades of london book that I never noticed#the green sky the hail and that the power went out#you know it’s wild that I’ve gone through what? four or five tornados here in New England#actually just so many natural disasters in general
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giving y'all a week to have one if you haven't already. also feel free to tell in the tags!!! :D ik i will
#macadamiaaa!!!! :D!!!#iasip#it's always sunny in philadelphia#sunny polls#OKAY SO I'LL START WITH MY MOST RECENT ONE (literally today's)#basically (i'll end up typing too much etc) it was me mac dee & someone else#there was another dream going on (i'd like to think of it as like a venn diagram of 2 dreams?? idk)#but like there was this punk house show whatever. anyway#mac & i were dating??? 2nd dream that's happened...i'm averting my eyes#BUT HE WAS SO SWEET we were just holding hands & i like just being as close to the person as possible so :-(((( ugh#anyway i distinctly remember having my arms wrapped around his chest (same from other dream of him like that goodgod)#anyway i apparently called him Papi for something & he went 'i'm papi? :o' & i was like 'yeah :D' or whatever????#BUT OVERALL HE WAS SO SWEET even when dee was being a bit suspicious (our other person was like ??? this is weird)#like he was complimenting her telling her she's doing great :-((( anyway#ANYWAY i think later mac was shirtless & got like nacho cheese on his chest in some hair#so that was the recent dream!!!! i'm excited to read y'all's!!!#I JUST REMEMBERED: i think i ran up to him like anyway i'm posting this no hesitations
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it's about being sad your fic has more hits than kudos/reviews but then remembering yourself reading other people's fics, enjoying them immensely, and forgetting to give kudos/review
#just me?#i can't blame people because i'm so guilty but also PLEASE ENGAGE WITH ME IF YOU LIKED MY THING#i require the knowledge that i did okay or i will seriously die#honestly though my most recent fics have been SO self-indulgent i'm not surprised if people read them and just went wtf was that#eve text#writing#ao3#ao3 writer#fanfic
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