#So I ended up procrastinating the whole day afterall lol

[raising-arthur]

//Here's the colored version

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[pinktatertots99]

part 1; part 2; part 3; part 4

i had fun with the latter half lol.

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knock

knock

knock

the red head yawned as they walked to the front door. scratching the back of their head as they opened the door their eye’s widened at the blue haired lapis smiling to them.

“did i wake you?” they asked, padpa looking absolutely confused but shaking their head lightly. “naaah...uh...well...yeaaaah maybe a lil.” they mumbled as lapis giggled a bit. “suppose i need to remember not everyones an early bird.” they joked as padpa moved to the side allowing them to enter.

“uhh can i get ya some cof-er-tea? water?” they tried to guess as lapis amused themself to their attempts. “i’ll be fine for now but thank you.” looking around the living room they found a short haired blonde fast asleep on the couch, immediately leading them to sit on a chair closeby as padpa threw a plastic cup at them.

“ello wake up.” they stated as yellow quickly shot up. “WH-ha-how where did-” they soon found the bluenette on the chair. “...padpa i thought we were gonna wait on the whole surrogate?”

“we are dumb dumb ya gotta wake up more.” they chuckled as they took a seat. “this is ruti’s...uhh...”

“call it whatever, you’ll be close to right.” they shrugged as both looked a nodded. “riiight. so, uhm, wha brings ya over?”

-------------------------------

rutile’s heels tapped to the cement as they ran. they knew lapis was gonna do something like this but so early in the morning!? their running decreased as it got through them more and more, the feeling that they...shouldn’t stop whatever was going on.

looking to the sunrise they walked to the cemented wall next to the sidewalk, laying on it’s side as they watched the sun illuminating over the beach. weirdly feeling some sort of...relief? calm? whatever it was, it’s something they really didn’t mind despite what they knew was probably going down.

they heard a couple footsteps from behind them as they tried to sneak a cigarette to their lips. “my my, always trying to sneak that nasty habit huh ruti?” they grimaced as they looked back to find yellow, padpa and lapis looking at them.

“stole my line.” lapis whispered to yellow as padpa took a step closer to the doctor, who immediately went back to staring at the beach when they did. “don’t gotta hide from me ruti.” they smirked to them as rutile burrowed their head into their arms. “i just...didn’t want to make it awkward.”

as lapis watched the two they reminiced on the last portion of their conversation during their visit.

“rutile’s...kinda...not wanna say clingy but...they do gotta complex kinda.” they remembered padpa stating awkwardly. “i mean, our relation though is probably different from yours though.” they chuckled a little at that. it wasn’t too different. it seemed the opposite, rutile trying to distance themself for them, as if worried on getting too close.

how casually they talked with them, was much different from what padpa had said about being clingy. and to say they were jealous was an understatement. this double sworded concept of their clingy-ness they wished for atleast the good part of it. ah but every good has it’s bad they suppose. even though the darker part of themself would say it wanted that bad with it just to have the good part of it truly showed how complex this double sword is.

“i’ve always chased someone away with who i am.“

ah, how could they forget that core comment they thought. such a shame, six months later and they realized the trouble they didn’t even take into consideration. watching them hug they felt another thought pop up.

“i want to…so badly. i want…a second chance. a chance, to change.”

“…then that’s good for me. afterall you won’t chase me away so easily~.”

and here they thought that would’ve automatically saved this problem as they re-thought back to these moments. pregnancy or not it’s not much of an excuse to forget such a problem; the conflict of being too close versus too far apart. only three months left, they wouldn’t have enough time to help through this, even the nine months however wouldn’t completely fix this fear the doctor had they speculated.

as their thoughts dozed away to these unnerved feelings they were brought back by the taller hugging them so suddenly.

- - - - - - - - - -

“heh, awkward? i mean, okay maybe doing this while ya got a preggers partner is a little bit awkward but it’s not too bad compared to other things.” padpa chuckled as rutile burrowed their face a little. padpa hesitantly giving their back a pat causing them to jump lightly.

“look, rutile i get it. i get, why you were so clingy. i get, why your acting like a hermit but, ya gotta let this go.” padpa stated as rutile shivered lightly. “...how?”

“just...don’t dwell on it.”

“if i don’t, then i’ll go back to being clingy again. so much inside me is screaming to hug you right now. and i’m scared, that i’ll never let go, or that i’ll let go and it’ll be the last time i ever had you close and regret letting go.” they shivered more, choking up as they finished. “i was...so ugly like that.” they choked up more as tears streamed down their cheeks.

“hey, seeing it means ya aren’t like how ya were before-”

“still, this doesn’t fix the problem.” they looked to the red head gritting their teeth through their tears. “i’ve...i’ve built myself around you. i’ve seen, so many dead bodies, and i was desensitized, but the idea of you becoming one of them, i was so scared. and then ya got better, and i thought i’d be alright. now i’m just worried anytime a call comes in and it’s you, or them, and i...i can only get through the day trying to distance myself.”

“....has it been working well?”

“...no...but it keeps me cool under pressure.”

“wha bout your partner?” rutile’s eyes looked down to their shoes as they stood up straight. “...ruti-”

“i’m...still scared.” they mumbled lightly. “of going into either extreme. i’m scared, of losing them both.”

“your gonna lose em faster if you don’t find a middle ground.” padpa stated, pulling the bruenette to them in a hug despite them wiggling in surprise. “wh- pa-”

“ya need to stop worrying bout either extreme. if ya wanna change, if ya wanna make this one last, then just open up like this.” they stated, feeling rutile stop and hiccup into their chest. once they felt their hiccuping lessen they moved to pull them away gently. “now go hug lappy.” they stated, padparascha red eyes meeting golden yellows.

moving them physically to walk into lapis’s direction, rutile slowly took a step, another, and another till they quickly sprinted to them, slowly down enough to hug them gently, getting around their swolen abdomen.

“...huh?”

“i’m...gonna make that change. i’m sorry for procrastinating for too long.”

slowly the bluenette hugged around their neck, on their tip toes as they felt tears pricking at the end of their eyes.

“my apologies for procrastinating on helping you. but you can still not chase me away easily my dear~.”