#Shen Qingqiu would go feral and it would be hilarious

[happypeachsludgeflower]

Concept: after Shang Qinghua lost his original draft, he said fuck it and wrote progressively worse and worse gibberish content for Proud Immortal Demon Way just to enjoy watching his favorite anti-fan, Peerless Cucumber, loose his shit.

[grubus]

okay, lets seee... How about Qi Qingqi x OG!Shen Qingqiu?

oh you are SO brave right now, that is not a ship I often see. I've read a very funny one where SY!SQQ genderbent and needed to be fucked and turned to QQQ for it amongst others, DEEPLY hilarious fic to me, can't remember the name right now.

But QQQ and OG!SQQ...

*thinks* gosh it really depends on what angle one goes for. I always hc them as having a REALLY fucking weird rivalry kind of relationship.

Like, he goes to brothels and is an unpleasant bitch, meanwhile she rejects the classic gender norms and is ALSO leaning into being a Bitch (rather than being a mild elegant Lady, she will kick you in the nuts and also maybe stab you)

SQQ is also weird about women and QQQ is kinda weird about men. They would, I imagine, start out as extremely angry fuck buddies. By which I mean they get physical and then it derails into fucking. And they would NOT acknowledge this at all. And then keep at it. Just....... constantly ending up furiously trying to put the other in their place, and SQQ would almost always lose because he is, again, WEIRD about women and would pull his punches until it's too late and QQQ meanwhile would take Offense and go Full Feral in return. But also SQQ hates losing. Imagine a cat fight. That's them. But like. Horny.

LQG would be terribly jealous and not even know why. tbh most people would be jealous, it's just that most want to be SQQ while LQG and YQY would want to be QQQ.

Eventually, if things ever chilled out, I think they would still never make it official (QQQ feels like she would refuse marriage) but Everyone Would Know and also they would be so catty against outsiders. Like no! Only they are allowed to talk shit about that bitch. How dare you attempt it???

...... poor LQG in this au, wow.

On the other hand, if SQQ was a woman? Trans or cis, doesn't matter, I think QQQ would be So Normal about her. I think YQY would eye her with worry every time SQQ is in the room. I think she would be so, so hot for this Ice Queen of a Woman and meanwhile SQQ would SOMEHOW be oblivious to this, because Only Men Are Horny Degenerates. fem!SQQ wouldn't know how wrong that is.

It would take years for it to get through her head. She would be Horrified and then Morbidly Fascinated and then they would become THE power couple of the cultivation world and QQQ would be so smug about bagging such a baddie.

In either au, they would form a very deep bond that absolutely no one understands.

[nyoomerr]

If you’re up to it:

Wei Wuxian getting the Xin Mo shards (from SVSSS) dropped on his head while in the Burial Mounds, and making some sort of portal artifact out of them.

I’ll leave the details up to you, though if you need more to work with: I find the idea of WangXian stumbling into the post canon SVSSS-verse, only to somehow end up mopping up some of the skipped/leftover PIDW wife-plots, to be absolutely hilarious.

mmnn admittedly i don't think i could really write non-svsss fic, but here's... something short and kinda similar (bingqiu finding wwx in the abyss, wherein the abyss == burial mounds)

---

"...Shizun, I think it's dead."

"Not yet he isn't," Shen Qingqiu corrects, poking at the boy's cheek tentatively with his fan.

"Shizun, I think it should be dead," Luo Binghe says, and Shen Qingqiu tries not to roll his eyes.

"Binghe was the one that dragged this child out of the Abyss and brought him home," Shen Qingqiu reminds him, casting Luo Binghe an unimpressed look over his shoulder.

Luo Binghe, hovering as far away from Shen Qingqiu (and the nearly dead boy) as he can seem to bear, scowls, turning his head away.

"That was before he started radiating tainted energy he picked up from the Abyss into our nice rugs," Luo Binghe mutters darkly.

Shen Qingqiu sighs, standing and turning away from the boy. The poor thing hasn't died so far; he can survive a few more minutes while Shen Qingqiu soothes his husband's ruffled feathers.

It's quite clear to Shen Qingqiu why Luo Binghe brought this half-dead boy home to begin with. Luo Binghe had gone off to investigate an Abyssal tear, expecting to find some instability or missing shard of Xin Mo or crazy monster or something, and instead found....

Well. Luo Binghe had been about this boy's age, when Shen Qingqiu had pushed him into the Endless Abyss. The boy has a cut in his chest, too; surgical and seemingly cared for and not quite in the same place that Luo Binghe had been cut by Xiu Ya, but similar enough. And from a cursory look, the boy has strong spiritual vein but no golden core - again, not quite the same as Luo Binghe's broken half-and-half cultivation that had ravaged his spiritual pathways on the edge of the Abyss, but...

Everything altogether, the boy really does remind Shen Qingqiu of the suffering Luo Binghe faced, all those decades ago. Shen Qingqiu is sure that he reminds Luo Binghe just the same.

He's sure that Luo Binghe had not been able to turn his back on this boy, thinking about how desperately Luo Binghe had wanted someone to come save him from the Abyss.

"Binghe," Shen Qingqiu calls softly. "What do you want to do?"

"Put him back where I found him," Luo Binghe grouches.

Shen Qingqiu tries not to look too amused.

"If I promise to not go near him without you," Shen Qingqiu clarifies, watching the way Luo Binghe's expression flickers, "what do you want to do?"

Luo Binghe falls silent, his expression dark. Shen Qingqiu isn't sure he quite hit the nail on the head, but he got close enough: Luo Binghe may feel pity towards a boy that reminds him of his past self, but Luo Binghe is just as equally wary of anyone that would be so similar to the half-feral demon that Luo Binghe had to become in order to survive the Abyss.

Luo Binghe didn't want Shen Qingqiu to be around him when he was fresh from the Abyss, instead choosing to only show himself to Shen Qingqiu after he'd begun establishing himself as a respected cultivator at Huan Hua. It's quite clear to Shen Qingqiu that Luo Binghe wouldn't want Shen Qingqiu around this boy, either.

"Shizun would be sad if he died," Luo Binghe eventually says, looking away.

"Mm," Shen Qingqiu agrees.

"And he should at least stay long enough he can scrub the floors he's dirtied," Luo Binghe continues.

"Of course," Shen Qingqiu says, as if he doesn't know full well that Luo Binghe won't be satisfied unless he himself is the one to clean the floors that Shen Qingqiu walks on.

"...I suppose he can stay for a small time, if it pleases Shizun," Luo Binghe sighs.

Shen Qingqiu smiles at Luo Binghe, and then turns back to the half-dead boy and begins working on making him less dead.

Inwardly, Shen Qingqiu feels a bit of glee. It's been several long years since Luo Binghe let Shen Qingqiu adopt another wayward stray, after all!

[sillygoofyqueer]

THE ANGST IS EVERYTHING TO ME. GRIPPING IT IN MY TEETH AND SHAKING IT AROUND LIKE A FERAL ANIMALLL!! The idea that everyone is just really worried about Shen Qingqiu and his wings that slowly have more bald patches is sooo sweet yet sad. I can't stop thinking about it because there's not much that people can do to help him out and stop him stressing because they don't know what's going on! There's nothing he should be stressed about because he seems fine with everything! There is discussions about how on earth they can help out and make him feel better, leaving everyone feeling upset that they can't do much to help. Meanwhile, Shang Qinghua is sat there in the background, feeling guilty to all hell as he stares at the floor because it is kind of, accidentally, his fault that Shen Qingqiu is feeling this way. YAPPING ABOUT THE PEAK LORDS!!!!! TEEHEE. Right, so obviously Mu Qingfang can do about this in the medical professional way - "this isn't good for your wings, and the irritation and such could lead to bigger flare ups of without-a-cure". However, he wants to get to know his shixiong on a personal level! He wants to be able to bond and listen to Shen Qingqiu just like the rest of the peak lords, so he'll take the whole challenge and carefully check everything out, waiting in the wings (hahahaha, I'm hilarious) for Shen Qingqiu's wings to be in need of preening and oooh no, all of the other peak lords got into a big fight for completely unrelated reasons!! Guess Mu Qingfang will take time away from treating them to check up on Shen Qingqiu. Oh dear, his shixiong's wings look to be in need of preening, care for a cup of tea while he does it for him? He's a good shidi, of course he would like to hear about whatever "boring" paperwork is plaguing his poor shixiong. After just one visit to Qing Jing peak, the other peak lords choke on vinegar for a while because Mu Qingfang's gentle disposition and calming smile (NOT pitying or overly coddling (or so he thinks)) is all Shen Qingqiu wants to preen him. Shang Qinghua is too busy being the An Ding peak lord to offer to preen Shen Qingqiu's wings for the longest time, but he is eventually in the room collecting some sort of request or paperwork when Shen Qingqiu finally loses his patience and is just like "preen my wings." Shang Qinghua is undeniably confused, but Shen Qingqiu doesn't care - if the man wrote in wing preening, he should be able to do it, it was only fair. It's really, really awkward until Shang Qinghua starts yapping about where the plot of PIDW was supposed to go and he starts absolutely complaining about how awesome that would have been. They bond through that, and Shang Qinghua is still an overworked peak lord but he actually finds that he also chillaxes after chatting while preening, so it's a fair arrangement! Okay okay, I recently read a characterisation of Wei Qingwei that I cannot stop obsessing over, so I am going to make it everyone's problem. He's like that one dad who's super charming and he loves his kids. Think...charismatic pirate who always likes to tease but does know how to take things seriously!! So, when he first sees Shen Qingqiu with unpreened wings, he obviously goes "the great scholar, looking like he's just gotten out of bed?" and laughs until he gets close enough to pick Shen Qingqiu up (injured wing or not) and then casually carries him through Wan Jian peak (because of course he wouldn't go to Qing Jing peak unnecessarily, it's not his jam) until they get to his house, in which he plops down his shixiong and bribes him into comfort with tea and pastries, going about preening his wings like a father would go about doing his child's hair for the first time - enthusiastic and gentle, but not really knowing what he's doing until the child (Shen Qingqiu) guides him - like, you know when they try and explain to their dad how to braid, but neither of them really know how to do it because it's early on in Shen Qingqiu's transmigration.

I yapped too hard and too long...AND I'LL DO IT AGAIN. I like yapping with you!!! Tell me anything else you think about, I can't stop doing it myself.

ahhh i'm glad you like it!! and you're SPOT ON with the pampering and carrying the other peak lords do<3 whether he's in his small bird form or his big human form with large wings, doesn't matter, he's getting picked up!! (i love liu qingge playing taxi chauffeur and realizing with horror that he likes holding shen qingqiu in his arms a little too much🤭)

so so so, i was just thinking about preening, if this is a canon compliant au, and shen yuan got dropped off in another's body, he probably has no idea how to take care of his bird features, let alone his wings, like how to align the feathers, removing molted ones, dust bathing to remove excess and stale lipids so his plumage stays fluffy, or taking care of pin feathers (new pin feathers have a blood supply flowing through it, if the pin is damaged, it can bleed pretty heavily!), so he just... doesn't. no more than clumsily washing them when he bathes, anyway. and then his wings start itching, and hurting, and the feathers are all askew, and he has all these tattered clumps and pins that hurt when he picks at it and what is he supposed to do...???

naturally, people notice when the prim proper scholar's peak lord, with the perfect hair and flawless skin, has two disheveled wings trailing after him. some of them are worried it might be some sign of self-neglect (also bc it's specifically his demon features that look uncared for), and of course when shen qingqiu coughs once so to speak, yue qingyuan shows up at his doorstep; and i was thinkingggg..... different peak lords taking turns coming to his bamboo house for some casual wing care and preening..... in some bird species preening each other strengthens the trust and bond between the two, for crows it's even a big aspect of social bonding! crows preen their young, their mates, and sick or injured birds, so it's only nature that a ill-feeling shen qingqiu relies on his companions to help him when he's incapable himself...

also because i can't stop imagining shen qingqiu sprawled out across liu qingge or yue qingyuan's lap in bliss while they very carefully align his feathers and tease out molted ones, maybe freeing some matured pin feathers, feeling akin to having his hair brushed and played with while they take care of hard to reach places (thinking about how allopreening birds in nature often have less ticks/healthier plumage bc other birds reach places they can't, but shen jiu probably wouldn't let anyone touch his wings so some parts of them were always a little... messy).

some birds (like parrots) might even overpreen when exposed to strong scents, so all the peak lords quickly learn not to put on too much or heavy perfume because it makes shen qingqiu rub and dig into his wings until feathers fall out

(and i haven't even mentioned the sheer angst potential of stress plucking, but ahh this ask is already so long!!!)

OOOOH MY GOD!!! That's such a wholesome idea. I can already imagine it - and it's always a fight of who gets to preen Shen Qingqiu's wings, to the point where it actually turns into a fight (thanks to Liu Qingge) and it's almost an all-out brawl until Mu Qingfang (the only reasonable peak lord jhebus) makes everyone draw lots to see who gets to do it (- and then cheats because everyone else is so hyped up from the brawl, and his dear shixiong simply cannot deal with such stress!!). It becomes a natural thing to come up with different ways of deciding (unless Shen Qingqiu asks one, then the others just have to choke on vinegar(kiiiidding sort of)), and the peak lord who got to do it last time is not allowed to participate in the next game because that's unfair! Spitballing about how different peak lords go about offering it at first, if I may!! I think that Qi Qingqi would be actually quite gentle about it - she's used to helping out the girls with their hair and other things (shark week 😔😔), so she knows how to go about being like, "hey, I know we don't always get along but I'm going to help you out with your wings, 'kay?" and he is immediately just like "jesus christ please save me from this torment pleasepleaseplease" - kidding, kidding, he'd be much more hesitant about it because he knows that his wings are delicate and he needs to place his trust in whoever's touching them. Qi Qingqi has been...hostile towards him (because of Shen Jiu, so he can't be too offended), and this could be a moment of weakness (- jesus, bestie boo, I'm making him sound like Shen Jiu) but...his wings hurt :[ At first it's awkward, but then Shen Qingqiu relaxes and it does NOT become a gossip session (it should and it does, you can take that from my cold dead hands). Of course, Yue Qingyuan is the first to offer at all, being all like "xiao-Jiu plleeeaaasseeee 🥺" and who is Shen Qingqiu to resist those puppy dog eyes? He seems to have a history with Shen Jiu so it wouldn't be suspicious of him to deign to allow Yue Qingyuan to help out. Of course, Shen Jiu used to let Yue Qingyuan preen his wings on the streets (if we're going that route), so he's skilled and immediately makes Shen Qingqiu feel comfortable as he feels the itchy feeling in his wings FINALLY disappear with every movement the other man makes. Of course, he should be analysing so he can learn to do it himself but...he's so comfy :( When Liu Qingge first does it, it's on a mission! GASP!! Yue Qingyuan sent them on a mission together because it was a matter of both brute force that needed some form of plan involved that wasn't just "grab smash kill" (and mayyybe he wanted his shidi to bond, who cares? Shen Qingqiu has been a lot less hostile recently, and he's going to take advantage). So, they're out on this mission, and it's a LOT fucking harder than they first thought, leaving them waylaid in the forests (stereotypical I know but screw you (/j)). Shen Yuan's (for brevity's sake) wings are slowly getting worse and he's so very uncomfortable but he can't reach the worse bits so he forces himself to abandon his pride for a second and begrudgingly ask Liu Qingge for help! Obviously, Liu Qingge has no clue what he's doing and has to be guided by Shen Yuan (Liu Qingge later claims to not at all be nervous, but his hands were shaking because he didn't mind this new Shen Qingqiu and didn't reaally want to hurt him). The next time Shen Yuan needs his wings preening, Liu Qingge (literally) kicks the door down to offer to do it. He may seem overly aggressive when he manhandles the peak lord, but he's really quite gentle. I do want to yap about the other peak lords, but this answer's really long already!!! If you want me to, please let me know, because I severely want to expose myself as a Mu Qingfang and Wei Qingwei fan and PLEASE tell me more about the angst potential pretty please, I'll be like Yue Qingyuan at your door with puppy dog eyes. I'm INVESTED NOW, GOD.