#She’s my one silly character who’s not horrifically traumatised

[darkcomets]

My farmer, Clover! (Please ignore the drawings, I promise I can do better 😭)

Infodump timeeeee

She’s an energetic and cheerful 19-year-old who is just trying to get by. Clover tends to be a bit over energetic at times though, with pretty exaggerated emotions. A little crazy and deranged at times, but she’s getting better, promise. Even with her name being ‘Clover’, she’s not exactly the luckiest person out there. Clover grew up with her mother, who more or less, basically ignored her most of the time. So she had a lot of freedom as a kid, and often got into scrapes and bits of trouble. She was always an enthusiastic kid, but was often too hyper for the other children to handle. She often stayed at her grandfather’s when her mother was out of the country for business. And she adored listening to her grandfather’s stories of his life working on the farm. She admired him, but her mother often told her that it wasn’t good work for someone like her. When her mother had to move out of the country, she didn’t take Clover with her, so she ended up being adopted by a man who she came to accept as her father. After that, she had a relatively normal childhood and teenage hood with some small disasters and dramas. After finishing school, she had went immediately into a job at Joja after finishing school to start quickly making money. Unfortunately, it was absolutely not for her. She despises the place and company with a burning passion for basically burning her out within a year. Clover moved to Pelican Town in hopes of continuing the life her grandfather had left behind for her, heart filled with dreams and determination. She struggled a lot at first, but after time, she worked things out. And here we are now…

I have drawn this idiot way too much.

[missfingers]

ok i don't know much about yakuza but i gotta know for the choose violence ask game: 3, 8, 11, 16, 22, 24? (you can also do these about another fandom instead if you want, i just chose yakuza bc those are ur little guys)

HI AUSTIIINNN. forgive me this will get long

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

ohh my god theres been so many. but okay i will specifically pull up an example from the server i run. no screenshots cause the conversation was way too long but essentially yakuza has a massive misogyny problem with its female characters (of which there are. barely any). the conversation was specifically about the hostess mechanic, which is this minigame that appears in almost every game where you go to a hostess club and have a date there (a hostess club if ur unaware is basically softcore sex work its paying a woman to talk to you at a club). ofc nothing wrong with hostessing but people were specifically talking about how it was Kind Of Creepy that all the protags are like.... 40+ and all the hostesses / other female love interests are a lot younger.

and then this guy came in saying something along the lines of... if you criticise the way hostesses are objectified in yakuza then actually you hate women and sex workers and youre saying its not a real career .....? NO ONE WAS SAYING THAT. it was really one of those situations where the person was acting like these fictional female characters have their own agency to do sex work and flirt with older men ignoring completely the Old Men Writing The Series. they are not real people making their own decisions these are women written by men. it was bizarre. this guy also eventually said that if you criticise panty shots in anime youre racist or something because "japanese culture is like that" okay.

already answered 8 here! <3

just realised i completely got switched up on numbers and i already answered 11 and thought it was 10, so my answer for 11 is here but i will also answer 10 for @kasugas since i fucking. didnt.

10. worst part of fanon

majima woobification. and the worst part is its in the games now too like they straight up woobified him in kiwami and i cant STAND IITTTT. hes literally a yakuza boss he violently beats up his men he canonically married an 18 year old and hit her when she aborted their fetus hes not a good guy and i love when canon shows that. but then fanon is just like solely fucking majima everywhere characterisation of ooo hes just a silly little faggot who loves kiryu and kiryu hates him <333 (even though kiryu. does not. and finds his antics hilarious in every other game. and treats him as his closest friend.) and also the uncle majima stuff....... i like thinking about his relationship with haruka as much as the next guy but when people just. slap them together with no consideration to the fact he KIDNAPPED HER. AT 10 YEARS OLD. like dude shes going to be traumatised you cant just Ignore that for the sake of giving her two dads?

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

oh i fucking know. i KNOW why they like it and the answer is theyre uncreative yaoi loving freaks but so much nishitani content is just him acting like some borderline rapey daddydom and its soooooo Eugh. they make majima into this uwu baby who doesnt want any of his advances until the relationship is literally liek something out of a fucking yaoi where he "really wants it deep down but hes going to act like he doesnt so its going to feel so uncomfortable and hes going to get borderline assaulted". the entire appeal of nishimaji to me is that nishitani is literally so down horrifically bad for majima and majima actually likes him back even if he thinks hes weird as shit. theyre both insane for each other.

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

ok im going to sound deranged here but his relationship with mirei. thats the 18 year old i mentioned. a lot of people choose to ignore he did that and like.... i get it its very uncomfortable to accept your favourite dude would prey on a kid like that but like. i feel like it does a disservice to his character to ignore that? it shows how he perpetuates the cycle of abuse and its so incredibly interesting to me but so many people just say "he wouldnt do that!!!!" when like.... yes he would. im sorry but he would.

24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

fuckig hell idk theres so much horrible yakuza discourse. ig its relevant rn but like whenever anyone genuinely critiques how fandom acts (misogyny, racism, woobifying a genuinely morally reprehensible character, ableism, just anything) and then the people who do this shit get all up in arms about it and act like its pointless infighting when its... genuine shit that makes a community unsafe

[jakeperalta]

Hi! Funny story...I was telling my sister about what happened on 911 and I said guess what happened, and I told her he kissed a guy. She said oh I think I did see some gifs..but I thought that was old. Didn't he die? I started laughing. I did tell her that he died but I can't believe she thought they actually killed him off lol. I said they just did that to have an obvious cliffhanger and a coma episode..I think? Also she wanted to know if they ever had an episode where someone got stabbed and I told her I would ask you. What other kind of emergencies do they usually call 911 for? Haha I can't really remember when I watched.

"didn't he die" hahaha yeah you're right it was just for the drama and the coma episode and there was no actual threat of him being gone for good. there was also an episode in season two where chimney got stabbed!

the emergencies are wild because one could be some tragic harrowing thing like a horrific car accident or plane crash, then you'll get one that's some unexpected thing that's basically paranoia fuel to me (i am haunted by the guy who got like swallowed up by the escalator 😳) and then there's just the plain bizarre (in the most recent episode a guy got knocked off his bike straight into a storm drain, plus there is the iconic newborn baby stuck in a pipe from the pilot). it keeps you on your toes whether you're traumatised and fearing for a character's life or just getting fun silly entertainment! the major characters have all at least survived so far 😅

[moiraineswife]

How did Az get fucked over with the Moriel thing?

-Because the relationship between them was twisted from ‘mutual interest with issues on both side and Az’s insecurity holding him back from pursuing a relationship with a woman who is ready to be with him but is holding herself back due to respecting him, his experiences and choices’ to ‘creepy, obsessive straight guy can’t take a hint and quietly pines after a queer woman for five hundred years making her actively uncomfortable with his attentions and being a contributing factor in her remaining closeted as well as sleeping with men she may or may not want to to maintain distance between them/. That’s....Fucked up on so many levels I can’t. (And this is not a condemnation of Az’s character - this is a condemnation of Maas’ writing because this should never have been done to him, it disgusts me) 

-Because Azriel was set-up to serve as a safe space for Mor in ACOMAF (he watches out for her, he supports her, he protects her, he is the one to go and talk to her and help calm her down when she’s upset and panicky. This is explicitly canon) and in ACOWAR she’s made to be afraid of him/ his outbursts. Cassian is forced between them as a buffer to make her feel safer/to relax afterwards. She sleeps with Helion/other men to remind Azriel she isn’t interested in him/to force distance between them. She is “petrified” of coming out to him. (This is a complaint beyond my Moriel shipping, obviously I shipped them romantically

-Because it’s implied that Eris knows about Mor’s sexuality and wouldn’t have touched her/forced her to be with him...But Azriel is set up as still loving her and lusting after her somehow completely oblivious to her sexuality/lack of interest in him. And I’m supposed to believe this...And be okay with it. That a man who abused her, who left her to die, who terrifies and traumatises her...Has more regard for her choices and feelings than Azriel, who was set up to love her unconditionally, to represent safety and security for her. Like. Sure.  

-Because I’m having a harder and harder time accepting the CoN fiasco as being in character for Az. It feels lazy to me. He’s a cookie-cutter copy of Rhys in that scene. I could POTENTIALLY have gone with Azriel not warning Mor about Eris the way Rhys did if it had been for her, if it had been to somehow protect her because she wasn’t supposed to be there/know until later (god fucking knows this thing is impossible to retcon) But I’m having a harder and harder time accepting him not telling her for the same reason as Rhys ‘I don’t trust you, you’re a silly, oversensitive child and I’m afraid you’re going to fuck this up for us’. Not Az, not with Mor, like, sorry. It feels like something to draw lines between them and force them apart/retcon/undo the Moriel set-up she did in ACOMAF to try and make the reveal better. 

-Because (this is my personal interpretation/opinion and not one I expect many people to share, and is something I’m having a lot of difficulty putting into words but...) A lot of the Cassian/Mor moments in ACOWAR felt like they should have been Mor/Azriel moments that were dramatically retconned/that Cassian was made far more physically affectionate and closer to Mor than initially appeared in ACOMAF to further force distance between moriel, give Mor some kind of support but strip away any potential Azriel/Mor scenes because of the “”””reveal”””” of her sexuality and Maas’ sudden desire to stop baiting the ship as much. (I loved the Cassian/Mor moments in ACOWAR, I’ve already said this but some of them felt...Like a lot more/altered from their relationship in ACOMAF which I felt demonstrated their unconditional love/support for one another while also maintaining aspects of friction and volatility that they do have. Like I said I’m struggling putting this into words but some parts felt like this was being shoved down my throat just a little too much. might just have been bad writing, might have been forcing Cass as the buffer and forcing Mor and Az further apart. I don’t know) 

-Because Moriel could have been a beautiful platonic relationship about the deep, undying unconditional love that these two people have for one another; for the lengths they will go to for one another and the things they would do and sacrifice to keep each other safe....Instead I’ve got a narrative involving a ‘petrified’ closeted queer woman and a man who can’t take a hint and obsessively won’t let her go/stop loving her despite what it does for her and like....I’m sorry but Azriel deserved so much fucking better than that. It’s disgusting. I feel vaguely ill writing all this out. 

I was happy with the Az content coming out of ACOWAR (and needing some kind of light in this black pit I probably got blinded by that to begin with) the flying lessons with Feyre were excellent, his moments during battle were beautiful, his rescue of Elain showed the compassion that he has in-line with Cassian. 

But I can’t ignore this seriously ugly undercurrent and how it transforms Azriel from a (legitimately) traumatised, insecure abuse victim lacking self worth and self esteem after the horrific abuse he endured as a child...And forces him into the narrative of the entitled straight man whose obsessive love makes a girl feel too afraid to say no to him and like...I’m sorry but in fucking up Moriel with this Dramatic Plot Twist Maas screwed over Mor’s character (infinitely more than Az’s, I’m not arguing that for a second) but it fucks Azriel’s up too. And not because ‘oh no he’s going to be so sad when she comes out to him the poor bat’ but because it turns him into an obsessive creep who, in some ways, is marked out as looking worse than her abuser. 

Bottom line is, what Maas did with the Moriel in ACOWAR fucks up Mor’s character, Azriel’s character, and the entire dynamic of the Inner Circle. I genuinely cannot believe how poorly this ‘twist’ was thought out. I feel gross now. I’m going to take a shower. 

[sincerelybluevase]

Sunday Symbolism: Unhappy Childhoods make Great Nurses

CtM is a drama series, so it is only natural that the main cast have some drama going on in their private lives, or have had some drama. That being said, however, I did notice that the amount of past family drama for our favourite nuns and nurses is really high. I thought I’d write a post about it, gathering all those origins. It seems that unhappy childhoods make for great nurses and doctors ;). Is this really symbolism? I don’t think so, but it is just something that struck me.

Parents

Deceased or missing parent:

Shelagh: Shelagh lost her mother as a young child, leaving her with only her father (as far as we know, she has no siblings). This has greatly affected her childhood. It has also greatly affected her later life; if she had not felt Timothy Turner’s pain so keenly, it is probable we would not have had Turnadette. We don’t know too much about her childhood and how her father treated her, but one can imagine that it must have been difficult. I also guess that her father is no longer alive, because he’s never mentioned and we did not see him at the wedding (though some people have speculated that he might have been somewhat abusive, in which case it might be possible that he simply wasn’t invited even if he was still alive). Shelagh’s childhood remains an enigma.

Barbara: Just like Shelagh, Barbara lost her mother at a young age, too. We do know that Barbara is very close to her father, as we could see in the wonderful S06X08. Even though she grew up without a mother and had a father with a demanding job, it seems that Barbara enjoyed her childhood.

Timothy: Poor Timothy lost his mother to cancer when he was about nine. We can see the problems that arise because of this situation play out in season two: poor Doctor Turner does the best he can, but juggling a demanding job and the care for his son is often too much. Luckily for Timothy, there’s a sweet nun who is ready to take him under her wing ;).

Phyllis: Phyllis is a bit of the odd one out in this list-within-lists, because she did not lose her mother. Instead, she did not have a father, not because he died, but because her mother conceived Phyllis out of wedlock. Phyllis herself has mentioned how she admires her mother for working incredibly hard to give Phyllis a good start in life, even though society was hugely prejudiced against them. Phyllis’ childhood can’t have been easy, but it seems she and her mother tried to make the best of it.

Troubled relationship:

Chummy: It is no secret that Chummy’s mother felt ashamed of her too-large and clumsy daughter. There’s also the fact that Chummy was away at school for a large part of her childhood, meaning she actually saw little of her mother. They do manage to let go of some of their hurt feelings when Chummy’s mother is deadly ill, so that’s something, I suppose.

Trixie: Trixie’s father suffered from PTSD, caused by his experiences in WWII. Trixie tells Jenny that she felt responsible for her father’s well-being, and would act cheerful and silly in an effort to keep his demons at bay. During the fourth season, she also confesses to Sister Julienne that he was an alcoholic, though he himself claimed he had no problem. It is also suggested that Trixie’s mother expected her daughter to take care of her traumatised husband (Trixie says that her mother took care of her father during the nights, and that, during the day, “it was my turn”). This is something that should never ever be asked of a child, ever. All of this has had a huge impact on Beatrix: not only has it formed the way she behaves in general (always trying to be bubbly and funny), it has also shaped the way in which she deals with life’s less-appealing aspects (she has trouble expressing emotions that aren’t ‘happy’, and becomes an alcoholic herself because she doesn’t have a healthy outlet for those negative emotions).

Sister Monica-Joan: CtM is pretty clear on the fact that Sister Monica-Joan did not have a good relationship with her mother (Sister MJ confesses that she thinks it is cruel that she should miss her mother, because they had a hard time being in each other’s company). In the books, it also becomes clear that Sister MJ did not have a good relationship with her father; he was abusive and controlling and misused his power to hurt his wife. There’s also the fact that her entire family broke all contact when she decided to become a nun (in the books, it is told that they even locked Sister MJ in her room, refusing to let her out till she decided not to become a nun. Sister MJ managed to get her way by writing to the flipping queen of England, telling her of her plight, and only by some type of royal decree was she released and allowed to enter the novitiate). Yeah, Sister MJ and her family aren’t the greatest match (then again, she does visit her nephew and his family, so I guess time does heal some wounds).

Delia: I kind of struggled with putting Delia into this list, because her mother is mainly highly over-protective. This can be smothering and border on abusive behaviour, but we haven’t seen enough of Delia’s mum to say whether she really goes too far (what we’ve seen takes place after Delia has had a serious accident, and I can understand that a mother remains a bit overbearing even after several months).

Jane: in the TV-series, poor Jane was put into St. Mungo’s because her parents could not deal with her panic attacks. This can hardly have been beneficial for their relationship. Still, it is a great deal better than the books, in which Jane is the illegitimate child of a rich man and a maid, grows up in a poor house, and is horrifically abused there.

Jenny: Again, there’s no indication of this in the TV-Series, but in the book the midwife’s sister, written by Jenny’s sister Christine, it becomes clear that poor Jenny and Christine didn’t have the best of childhoods, either. Their parents divorced when their children were still quite young, and both remarried. Their partners were downright cruel to Jenny and Christine, ignoring them and forcing them to live like strangers in their own homes (there is one horrible incident in which her mother’s new husband smashes the lid of the piano down on Jenny’s fingers, because he doesn’t like it when she plays whilst he is home…)

 Siblings

Cynthia: I can’t really say that Cynthia’s home situation was unfortunate (in fact, for all we know, she had a perfectly happy childhood), but there is one thing that was less than ideal: Cynthia had a handicapped brother. This must have been hard at times, and I think it must have been an important factor for Cynthia to get into nursing.

Sister Evangelina: apart from the fact that Sister E grew up quite poor, she also had a somewhat troublesome relation with one of her younger brothers. This guy had mental problems, and did not always receive the proper care (partly because he himself doesn’t seem to want it). This caused Sister E quite some sleepless nights.

As a side note: Trixie does have a kind of phobia for fish ever since her brother dropped her into a rock pool. This is the only time she mentions having a brother. I’m not sure if that’s an indication for her not having a good relationship with him after the incident, or whether we’re just working with the constraints of an hour-long period drama in which there’s no need for such a brother to be mentioned again ;).

 Both

Patsy: Poor Patience Mount really tops everyone. She spent a part of her childhood in a prisoner-of-war camp, where she saw her mother and sister succumb to exhaustion, starvation, and tropical diseases. We do know that her father survived, but the experience scarred Patsy for life. This girl suffers from PTSD and has trouble expressing emotions, which becomes especially clear during the third and fourth season.

 Unknown

Valerie: Not too strange, since this girl is the newest addition to the main cast. We do know that there’s a secret, but whether this relates to her childhood, her teenage years, or her time in the army is yet unknown.

Sister Winifred: Sister Winifred remains the enigma of CtM. I have high hopes for her in future series, though.

Sister Julienne: We don’t know anything about her childhood. The only thing we know is that she suffered through something similar as Sister Bernadette in Season Two, only she made a different choice: Sister Julienne was in love with a man, but felt that her calling was stronger, and decided to turn him down and become a nun instead.

Patrick Turner: I’ve put Patrick here, because we don’t know too much about his childhood. His ‘drama’ stems from WWII, in which he was traumatised and suffered a nervous breakdown. However, that happened when he already was an adult. I’d have to reread Doctor Turner’s case book to find out more, because even though a lot of things from that good read stuck with me, I can’t remember things about his childhood.

 I can’t really say that all of these characters had unhappy childhoods (frankly, it depends on the person; you can suffer through a lot of hardships and still feel that your childhood was a happy one, and the reverse can also be true), but I thought it was something worth pointing out. I feel that this post has been a lot of aimless rambling; I’ll be back next week with something a bit more coherent, I promise ;)