#Seriously tho dont be mean to the AO3 team
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First time during such a crisis. How's everyone else's evening ruined?
#ao3#Seriously tho dont be mean to the AO3 team#They're doing their best#Everyone scrambling back to tumblr is funny tho#Meme#AO3 is DOWNNN#Wild fr
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yet another ask dump yeehaw!
do you ever think that jay's mother was one of those bitch who believes in horoscope and tarots and things like that and so he believes in these things too, or it is just me projecting?
sheila haywood took one look at jason's birthchart said 'nah this won't do' and left.
Wait, but what happens when the justice league does find out that Bruce and John fucked? Lmao it sounds like it would be hilarious, really, I don’t want a justice league that doesn’t make fun of Bruce for like his entire life.
barry runs out of the meeting immediately and comes back with an entire sti testing kit. diana fully seriously wants bruce to get tested while bruce is sitting there like 'come on guys, you're being ridiculous, i already checked twice'
john is standing in the corner clearly offended while bruce is just like 'don't even say anything, constantine, you fucked a shark'
tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.
on the one hand, good for him, on the other hand, bro, how do you still have a secret identity when your superhero name is just your last name,,,,
Your fic on ao3 was GOLD PLEASE CONTINUE I loved Dinah's cameo btw ( @purple-vixen
thanks so much! i already continued but this ask is like 10 years old because i'm a notorious procrastinator (also yes! i love dinah so much aahhhhhhhhhhhh)
I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.
bruce internally: holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit bruce externally: get out of my city, alien
AHHH ur multimedia fic is the only thing that brings me happiness anymore continue it forever pls
uhh thanks, but can't continue it forever because my attention span is that of a toddler on crack on a good day and i can't function without at least 10 things going on at the same time and music in the background
Oi, so I'm getting into dc and watching batman the animated series, and they use fruitcake a lot. Which I thought was very funny and wanted to share w you - Denilla
wait like fruitcake (food) or fruitcake (derogatory) ?
young justice 🤝 teen titans slut shaming batman
tim drake and dick grayson to their respective teams 'you guys stop it, that's my dad'
Happyhoganon: If an eighty year old Batman had fought crime in Gotham City for decades and the only threats to him and the city lately are a wheel chair bounded Penguin, your usual purse snatchers and a few con artists popping up every now and then, how well could the Dark Knight do in maintaining the peace in Gotham despite him being just somewhat fit to do that as an elderly man (which says A LOT given how old he is)
uhh he'll probably do what my grandpa does and that is ruthlessly prank them until they die of shame.
in the death in the family interactive movie there's an ending where Jason is tasked with raising Damian and he decides he's gonna raise Damian to take down the waynes and al ghuls which uh maybe isn't great BUT the idea of Jason raising Damian... PRICELESS. CHAOTIC. I just need more people to know about this :)
yes i saw that wow holy shit but jason would accidentally drop damian on his head one (1) hour in and jason just yeets him into the lazarus pit.
Headcanon: The Penguin has a really hard time fighting any of the Robins because of his avian obsession means there's always a small part of his mind that's like "Birb. Child. Protect" ( @subspacecadet )
as soon as dick becomes nightwing the penguin is like 'you know what, fuck this dude' and shoots at him.
Y'all talking about King Shark dating Constantine, let's not forget about John literally hooking up with Satan
listen there's a clear difference between monsterfucker and satanfucker in that king shark is literally a shark and satan still looks like a normal dude
Does everyone in Gotham think Batman is a teen dad?
everyone in gotham thinks batman has been around since gotham was founded, but they do think that bruce wayne is actually a teen father and dick grayson's biological dad.
why. why would you do that fancast when you know it will only hurt people
what? i loved my fancast it was really well done. i did it with good representation in mind and i really managed that with alfred pennyworth being ✨italian✨
Seeing james charles a jason gave me psychic damage how dare you i need to wash my eyes
well that's a you problem isn't it?
do you think dick grayson thirst tweets about nightwing just to annoy his family/cause problems on purpose in general?
he thinks nightwing is hot, next question.
holy jiminy cricket batman, its as cold as the good lords ass crack in here!!
i- what? this is why i don't fuck with english expressions it's way too goddamn weird
Brooooooo, your teen dad!Bruce au is soooo good. I've got brainrot.
Honestly if you ever write anymore, I'd read that shit twice. Sign me the fuck up. Good stuff, Good Stuff.
uh yeah i'm thinking about writing a fic, but i have exams coming up and i don't wanna fail because that would suck. but after i'll certainly be writing more tho
your teen dad AU is so great! bruce acting like a big brother for all of like a week before he's telling everyone about his son. what if in the AU dick meets the JL because they need to rescue him? maybe he's in trouble/kidnapped at a gala and bruce starts calling for JL. clark finds him and has to fly with dick to bring him home - that's how dick and clark meet and superman becomes dick's fave hero. he goes around the manor thinking he can fly with a red blanket draped around him like a cape.
actually- if you want a young dad! bruce fic with like that kinda stuff(just with damian) go check uhh- in for a penny by cdelphiki. it's really good and bruce is like 24/25-ish. (and dick's there!!!)
This account has solely convinced me that Tim is a trash goblin ( @hamilcat-and-magic-turtle )
because he is. that boy has slept in dumpsters on multiple occasions even if he is the son of a billionaire.
Okay but when you said victory dance I did think of the whole justice league defeating the big bad and then they all start flossing
well that's exactly what hal jordan does and that's why batman uses a gun now. no but the victory dance in my opinion is like the 'we're all in this together' dance from high school musical.
The horrors in Invincible s1 was nothing compared to the comics, I cant wait for s2
oh well okay, i mean i personally react to horror and violence by laughing awkwardly so i can't wait to be called a monster for accidentally laughing at a mass murder.
I'm currently watching Batman: The Brave and The Bold and- Bruce is just talking about Oliver like he's an old love (@nightwings-kid)
okay im going to watch that lmao that's totally and completely in character for him tho.
The invincible comic is like super gratuitous with its violence so much so I'm shocked the show was able to adapt it in a faithful way! Anyway had the show been live action it absolutely wouldn't have the same impact as it does as an animated show and I'm so glad so many people agree with me on that
also because a live action casting would've been like uhh amanda stenberg for amber, the dude- the guy from the supernatural but with a mustache for omni-man, and scarlet johanssen for debbie grayson
Debbie grayson is a milf, yes. You're welcome for the invincible propoganda, now you can questions your life. Bruce def seems like the perfect father next to Omni-man. Like they really took a rip off justice league and I was like well, now I'm attached even tho I was like hah I know who they're supposed to be. And then bam- death gore death gore gore gore sad Mark grayson just had to have daddy issues. Why does every character have daddy issues. I'm sick of the attacks
because daddy issues make a person arguably funnier, that's why i'm not even remotely funny (haha good dad flex). i liked that it was dark contextually, but not in the colouring, bc i hate when it's like 'uh yeah graphic murder and now a shot so dark you have to sit in a dark room and squint at the screen to faintly see the characters. (like dcau ugh)
About the Wayne insurance, for a moment I thought you would put the video with moans over the waves.
i mean- i could've done that, but rick rolling seemed more family friendly.
Its the first time in forever that im surpise rickrolled, i usually expect it. Congratulations (i really should know better this is tumblr)
i get rickrolled so often but i actually like the song so i dont really give a fuck
Actually, my information about Damian and John's kids is outdated because it was revealed that the old men telling the kids stories about the Supersons were actually Jon and Damian the whole time. I was blinded by my thirst for Grandpa!Bruce Wayne but I was wrong... I liked my version better, tbh (@artemisa97)
fair enough. but i'd honestly like to see damian and jon getting together, just because it's a really fun dynamic and their friendship was really cute when they were kids. (also idk maybe it would be nice to have one (1) main batfam/superfam character that's not cishet)
How am i JUST finding your blog skdskfkd you're so fucking funny and ur takes are hot
i thought u were calling me hot :( but youre not :( crime detected (but lmao thanks)
So I have depression and I swear that your memes are one of the few things that have made me laugh so thank you 💛🥺 (@katekanebadass)
aw you're welcome, and i hope you're doing okay!
The metropolis memes are so funny, I love them 💀😌
i think metropolis is also so fucking funny it deserves more attention imagine having your entire police force being upstaged by an alien from kansas and his kids
as an american i feel your complete lack of knowledge of us geography is just so sexy (platonic) ❤️
thanks so much (i also don't know any other geography, i'm not kidding, like you can tell me you're from hungary and it will just blank, there will be nothing that comes to mind)
In the DC universe they don't say "Can't have shit in Detroit" they say "Can't have shit in Gotham"
this just reminds me of that guy whose porch got stolen like the steps to his door, and i'm thinking of people living in gotham and waking up without a front door and going "can't have shit in gotham"
honestly all i know about chicago is the bean, so. what would gotham's famous sculpture be?
gigantic gargoyle statue in front of one of the police precincts because a villain thought it was a smart way to keep the police inside, but it's too heavy to move.
why tf do people go on about how batman "works alone" or how he's the "lone wolf" when he like 38290202 members in his family
bc people think it's cool that a grown man in his 30s has no friends or family instead of calling it what it is (sad)
Bruce is gotham's sugar daddy
why would say something so controversial yet so brave.
my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context
dick: gerard way are you in position, gerard way are you in position
tim: for the last fucking time, my codename is 'totally not count olaf' this week, abbafan 3000
dick: shut up my codename isn't 'abbafan 3000'
dick: it's 'abbafan number 1' and you know it
I have a feeling Tim drake is ur favourite batfamily member but okay u don't have favs if u say so ok
i mean he is, i won't deny it. but i love each and every one of the batfam just the same, i just have a weak spot for short dumbass nerds, because i'm a short dumbass nerd.
Omg i fuckin love boy meets world too fam shsjkfk
bro boy meets world was the shit!!! it was just fire and awesome and so fucking great like bro. it was so good im not even going to be accepting criticism
you know I find the whole "joker completes batman" thing a bit disgusting considering the horrendous stuff the batfamily went through because of the joker and let's not get started on the "joker has a point" thing like yeah he's this cool complex villain but he's absolutely batshit crazy
like yes! i get what you mean the joker just fucking sucks man he doesn't do shit for batman's character or the batfam he's literally just annoying as fuck. like the joker has a point' shit is so stupid. i will accept 'magneto was right' because he fucking was and i think he didn't do anything wrong, but joker? he's just like that. he's not even cool and complex he's just a weirdo with a bleach kink at this point.
ALSO YOUR RACISM POST- SO TRUE BESTIE
thanks bestie, i'm glad you agree.
in today's essay of why I think cass should become batman- I was thinking Tim would probably be the most efficient batman in many ways but I also think he wouldn't want to be batman tbh none of the batfamily members would want to be batman because they're trying to outgrow him but cass is the one who wants to represent the symbol that is batman
absofuckinglutely i will say it again and again that cass represents the batsymbol more than anyone in the batfam, in batgirl (2000) she literally didn't care about anything else than bruce's oath to not kill, she thought the batsymbol was more important than anything in gotham. she's just an excellent character because her motivation to not kill is not 'i'm scared i can't come back from it' or 'well my dad says no murder so i'll go along with it' but that she's killed somebody as a young child and she never wants to kill a human ever again and that's so fucking beautiful for a new batman like yes.
need more cass, duke and tim inclusion in gothamite memes
yes yes, a tall order of cass, duke and tim coming up in 1-14 business days
oldest to youngest batfam members cus I'm confused as shit
okay order of being taken in: dick, jason, tim, cass, damian, duke order of age: alfred, bruce, dick, cass, jason, tim, duke, damian (though cass and jason are around the same age general consensus is that cass is a little older)
I'm so confused Steph is a redhead?? like how was it that hard to get this right? the source material is literally right there and free
cw is jared, 19
do you receive anon hate? if so, how do you deal with it
uh no, i'm not remotely popular enough to get anon hate and i also don't say a lot of things that would attract anon hate, but i do send anon hate to @the-real-peter-parker because he forgot about the specialists from winx club
Wait how many languages do you speak??
uhh- 5 if you include latin, but that's a dead language and i'm really bad at it. but english, my native language, german, and french also, tho german and french not fluently.
You can mix aguaepanela with aguardiente 😈 and is tasty
okay but now i'm curious if the liquor deserves the 😈 emoji or if that's a you problem. but i googled it and it looks like something you'd take one sip of and then not remember the rest of your evening.
#i love all of you guys so much thanks for all these asks#some of these are literally from march but fuck it#the day tumblr puts dates next to anon messages is the day i close my inbox crawl into a hole and die#it's such a basic task to answer asks but i don't want to bother anyone with asks clogging up their timeline#and if i don't have a funny or good answer i'm like 'uhh okay won't answer it now then'#so this is for you#also i deleted a few asks because it gives me mental pain to see my inbox go over 50 and it's almost at 100#i was complaining about having too many asks to the-real-peter-parker like months ago and then i had 45 asks in my inbox#now it's amassed to going over 100 twice#but no i love all of you and you're great and you're all fantastic and i lvoe you#muchos kiss kiss#kiss kiss for my kiddies lvoe you#invincible spoilers#dc#dcu#dc comics#ask#anon#bataranswers#i really wanna try aguapanela now i'm gonna see if i can find panela somewhere and review it for you babes#uh yeah that's it#muchos gracias for all your questions babes
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what’s the stitch? | pt.1
on ao3
from the high school senior that brought you wanna chat? comes another chat fic that no one asked for
just so we're all on the same page, alya has the fox miraculous, nino the turtle, and chloe the bee. i latched onto this team of miraculous holders a while back and now i'm just throwing up random stuff. initially i wasn't going to write more than a small snip of this but @breeeliss is a horrible enabler (<3)
i'm still working on the dynamics for them, especially since they're still getting to know each other, so sorry if it's rough
anyway let's do this
18:23
Cat: What does this do? Oh COOL
Bee: what in fresh hell is this
Turtle: yo wassup this is rad wait lemme see…
Fox: HELLA
Ladybug: Chat what the hell did you do
Cat: Hey don’t blame me for being bored
There are fun settings on these things and I wanted to explore them
Fox: this is rad as hECK
Bee: i hate you all
Fox: this is going to be lit i cant believe i can text the crew through a weapon the magic whatevers that created these things knew what was up
Turtle has changed their name to michael angelo
michael angelo: hell yeah
Cat: Whoa what we can do that!!
Bee: this is going to be the most obnoxious chat ever i can feel it let me leave
Cat has changed their name to :3
Bee: holy shit let me out wait why the hell don’t these things have emojis i am personally offended
:3: Ah yes let me just call up the ancient gods and ask them to install emojis on our weapons
Bee: listen here you piece of shit
Fox has changed their name to foxy lady
Bee: can i give back my miraculous i don’t want it anymore
foxy lady: this is the best thing to ever happen
michael angelo: aYO
:3: I love it It’s like a less awful skype
Ladybug: Can we maybe try to keep this for talking about where akumas are?
:3: Hmmm
foxy lady: i mean we COULD
Bee has changed their name to beeutiful
beeutiful: ;*
michael angelo: yeah no way thats happening ladybug
:3: Its bonding!!!
Ladybug: Now I want to leave
:3: Awww join in on the fun my lady! Please??? Team bonding
foxy lady: @chat do u know how 3 get youtube on these things ive got videos to send
beeutiful: ummm what sort of videos?
foxy lady: ;)
michael angelo: if you send a meme ILL give up my miraculous
foxy lady: good we dont need u
Ladybug: Did you say team bonding??
:3: Yes that’s exactly what this is Duh
6:13
michael angelo: well shit i really hope your kwami alert you of messages or something cause im actually going to use this the way its supposed to be used akuma at eiffel tower
6:17
beeutiful: disgusting i’ll be there in a minute
:3: You’ll BEE there?
beeutiful: im going to punt you off the tower
foxy lady: i ws going to tell u 2 shut up unfortunate wheres the bug @
michael angelo: um??? backup??????? please????
foxy lady: OH right omw
6:19
Ladybug: Ill be there in a sec
6:48
foxy lady: i cant believe u all bolted like that i was gonna ask if we could do breakfast
Ladybug: I’m about to destransform, sorry! Ill talk to you all later but really since my kwami can only tell me that I have a message but not whats in it please try not to talk here too much I wont be able to tell whats important
:3: I can’t beelieve this
beeutiful: im literally going to rip your head off
foxy lady: everything is important anyway food i guess ill find some on my own then on my own pretending hes beside me :’(
beeutiful: @ladybug if you figure out how to mute this please let me know because oh my god
michael angelo: bro im just gonna snag a bag of chips before class
:3: Healthy
michael angelo: what was the last thing you ate cat boy?
:3: You’re going to judge me
beeutiful: im always judging you
foxy lady: oooooo
michael angelo: what are you a health nut or osmething cn?
:3: Not by choice
foxy lady: unfortunate
michael angelo: alright next patrol were getting super cheap pizza
foxy lady: and fries and milkshakes and possibly also hamburgers superheroing makes me hungry
beeutiful: ewwwww
foxy lady: dont like junk food???
beeutiful: no!!! its greasy and disgusting and sooo bad for your skin like who wants to deal with THAT
:3: Ok true I don’t have time to deal with acne
foxy lady: u both have unfairly perfect skin
michael angelo: ^^ true tho how do you manage that??
beeutiful: good genes and a fantastic skin care routine sure i’m naturally gorgeous but it takes a little work to reach true perfection
:3: So many different types of scrubs and creams So many that I could drown in them And also makeup Usually concealer and foundation every day
beeutiful: true my contour btw? art
foxy lady: thats cool but u havent seen my cat eye
:3: ;)
michael angelo: yeahhh makeup isnt my jam i suck at it 0/10 not attempting again
beeutiful: what!!!! makeup is EVERYONES jam i mean if you don’t like it whatever but with practice and patience you too can look as good as moi if you think you don’t look good with makeup on it’s just cause you’re not doing it right trust me
foxy lady: yeah bro if we didnt have these masks id totally do u up during patrol one night
:3: Add that to the list of things to do if we ever reveal our identities Makeovers
michael angelo: theres a list???
beeutiful: wait i thought we could never ever tell each other ever boss’ rules
:3: A cat boy can dream
foxy lady: do we think ladybug likes makeup
beeutiful: oh my god the most important question shit i’m about to detransform anyway check out my contour next time we’re out because it’s flawless
michael angelo: im out too ive been pushing it later dudes
foxy lady: and then there were two
:3: Benefits of using catacylsm at the end I guess
foxy lady: :P this miiiiight b difficult if we can only use it when transform eh w/e ill take what i can get
:3: Same honestly
17:34
foxy lady: im bored and my actual friends are busy
17:39
michael angelo: so we arent your friends then
beeutiful: i am not your friend
foxy lady: wow rude
michael angelo: what saving paris together doesnt make us friends?
beeutiful: as if!! being my friend is a privilege it’s like getting access to an exclusive club
foxy lady: soooooooooooo u dont have many friends then
beeutiful: fuck you i have plenty of friends
:3: Children please Ladybug is literally going to have my head
michael angelo: broski you were talking wiht us earlier
:3: Yeah but I didn’t have her glare burning holes into my soul the entire time
foxy lady: UR!!!!!!!!WITH LADYBUG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:3: Yeah of course I’m with Ladybug?
beeutiful: and why exactly were we not invited??
:3: Parents need alone time sometimes
michael angelo: oh my god
foxy lady: #rude #betrayal #urnotmyrealdad #ettuchatnoir #whentheydontloveuback
beeutiful: stop before i hunt you down and stop you myself
foxy lady: #fucku
michael angelo: question is lb seriously that annoyed
:3: She’s not thrilled Hmmm how to Got it
:3 has sent a photo [selfie of Chat Noir smiling and holding up a peace sign with an unamused Ladybug in the background]
michael angelo: well thats a look i never want to face head on
foxy lady: rip u id face it down if it meant i got to spend more time w ladybug
beeutiful: fangirl much
foxy lady: oh shut up i kno ur the same
beeutiful: oh do you????
foxy lady: ummm yeaH i remember our first day do u
beeutiful: shit
michael angelo: i like to block most of that day from my memories
beeutiful: no one asked you shellhead
:3: Children please Wait really?
michael angelo: ehhh i mean it was really cool and life changing and all that shit but also i embarrassed myself in front of two of the most awesome people ever so yeah
beeutiful: kiss up
michael angelo: listen my dude i was not ready to be a superhero before this the most exercise i got was climbing the stairs to my apartment and the occasional run from akumas
Ladybug: To be fair Chat and I werent ready either
foxy lady: !!!!!!!!!! she speaks!!! ok but ive been prepping to b a superhero since i was like 4
beeutiful: same actually
:3: I watched way too much Sailor Moon not to be ready But I still wasn’t ready Lots of face planting
Ladybug: It gets easier and you have chat and I for help You dont have to figure this all out on your owns
:3: True Doing it by ourselves was unfurrtunate
beeutiful: moment ruined
foxy lady: im tearing up thank u i feel loved
michael angelo: ok so who wants to teach me tricks to get out of class and work for akuma attacks because bru h
:3: Uhhhh
Ladybug: Um
:3: You’re on your own good luck
beeutiful: wow you’re a great mentor we’re so lucky to have you
Ladybug: Be creative in your lies and dont repeat the same ones too often??? But also dont get too extravagant because then its a mess and gets out of hand Now stop messaging here its annoying!!!!!!!!!!!
19:03
:3: Does anyone have cheese?
Ladybug: Chat if this isnt relevant I will end you
:3: I swear it is!
beeutiful: umm yes why??
:3: I need some We’re out and I didn’t realize Could you meet me somewhere with it?
beeutiful: i guess if it’s that important? what kind
:3: It is that important Anything If you have camembert that But anything
michael angelo: how is this relevant
:3: Grumpy hungry kwami
beeutiful: i have camembert how do you not have food for your kwami?
:3: It’s been a long week sue me Tower in ten?
beeutiful: i can’t believe i’m doing this but yes you owe me whiskers
19:11
foxy lady: thisll be the weirdest brush contact paris has ever seen
#marinette dupain cheng#adrien agreste#nino lahiffe#chloe bourgeois#alya cesaire#my fics#whats the stitch#this is ridiuclous om gody
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Genderfluid!Saruhiko
Help. I’m thirsty for more genderfluid!Saruhiko (please check out my fanfic called Skirts and Fishnets. Located on both AO3 and @my-writing-is-trash ) so I’m just going to put some things down here and I’ll add on when I think of more. YOU ALL CAN FEEL FREE TO ADD MORE. I LOVE THIS AU SO MUCH.
[Everything below is at the time of when my fic takes place– a few months after the Destroying of the Slate so he’s 20]
Soft Warning: I swear, okay? I get in the spirit of things and get excited and it comes out that way. I cut most of it out.
Makeup? They look fabulous in everything. Eye-shadow, lipstick, nail polish??? Yes. They are stunning and love it all. Especially mascara/eyeliner because their eyes pop in such a nice fashion (not like they do anyways but even more is A++). On any day, they wear eyeliner because it makes them look stunning. They especially like dark blue make up (light blue is nice too but they like the constant and pop that the dark colors give against their pale skin) even though it’s so damn hard to find some of it. Like, they walked into a store looking for dark blue lipstick because the light blue wasn’t working out for some reason and they nearly stabbed the make up section BECAUSE THEY ALWAYS SELL JUST REDS. They got irritated and just bought a black instead which, incidentally, turned out to be perfect.
Nail polish? they love that, especially on their non-masculine days (even tho they leave it on the masculine ones because 1) a hassle to take off. 2) everyone already knows that if they comment, they die. 3) it’s kinda comforting sort of?). Ofc blacks and blues, they would do purple– at least light purple tho– too but Niki fucked that up.
Clothing? Sexy in everything. Nearly absolutely everything. Women’s, men’s, gender neutral? EVERYTHING. I could write a whole big extra post on this (I might even) but I’ll just put down a few things here:
Obviously the typical “Saruhiko” look with his dark colors and all but he also likes to venture out a bit. On the days that they wear more “feminine” clothing, it usually comprises of a nice simple skirt, some sort of shirt (basically the same thing as any other non-work day except for special events or finds something they like), and dress boots. The whole outfit is, naturally, fitted with a small knife set. (I’m gonna write a mini thing about a skirt I want them to wear. Maybe put it in my fic as well). The times when they are more masculine, it’s the same “Saruhiko" look. No difference in wardrobe because none is needed.
SUITS. Their shoulders are too broad to fit in some dresses at this time (when they were younger, they could) so suits it is. And that of course is not an issue because fuck me they are sexy af. [I’m thirsty for people in suits. I have no idea why but for some reason I die when I see someone in a suit. Please dont make a real Saru appear in front of me with a suit unless you want me to die automatically. Like, I dont want to ripe it off of them, I just want to stare at them forever] Misaki instantly has nose bleeds seeing them dressed all fancy.
So that is it of how they express themselves. ugh, whats next. Backstory? Alright, I’ll try to explain some of it
Copied out of my fic: “ This is… new. The old was me. Once in middle school, I had found a bottle of purple nail polish laying around on the floor of the classroom. At this point in time, I had started to seriously consider my sexuality and gender. Typically, I could really care less– if you’re happy, be happy, I have no reason to judge, but then, feelings had started to swirl inside me like a whirlpool. I was angry at myself at first, fully believed that I am just a monkey… a failure, a failure that I couldn’t just be a normal guy that went to school and could hit on girls. So, when I found the little purple bottle, I had hid behind the school. I was curious, no stupid, and started to paint my nails. I have never done that, actually do something that was girly. It was a rush of feelings, angry, happiness, sadness, giddiness; there was enough feelings that I couldn’t help but laugh as my eyes teared up. It was proof that I was a failure but also proof that I could be someone different, someone whose life wasn’t an endless parade of despair. During the midst of raw feelings, Misaki had found me hunched up behind the baseball pits. First, he was concerned, who wouldn’t be if their friend is hiding with tears falling down their face? But once he saw the nail polish bottle laying in the grass by my feet, he just smiled. A genuine beautiful warm smile cross his face as he laughed and picked up the bottle, saying, “Fushimi, you could’ve told me. There’s nothing to be ashamed about.” He grabbed my half painted hand and brush-cap to start to go to work after those words. His blind acceptance was… wonderful. Wonderful in the fact that he could really care less whether I wore skirts or pants, whether I wore make up or went bare, whether I was girl or a boy. He took me for who I was– his friend.”. So yeah. That’s that. You could probably find the cause of why they are upset because of his dickish father, no shit.
Essentially, Saru had many conflicting feelings about his gender when they were young (12 at this point) and having a father that doesn’t help much– really not at all, or even worse so. At times, Saru didn’t feel like they fit into the masculine standards, yes they were a guy, yes they dressed like one and acted like one but deep down, they didn’t feel like one. At firstly they were concerned because they didn’t feel like a guy and they were nearly 90% sure they weren’t female either so where they? For a year of suffering from NIki and suffering from this confusing confliction, they figured out they were either female nor male at times but they were just… there? No defined boundaries of gender yet still existed as a gender? Saru was just confused but through the means of logic, technology and information, they finally realized what exactly what they are on those none masculine days. Yes, they go back to male from time to time depending on the day or week but they figured out that the other identification was neutrois. Then came the problem that how did they like feminae clothing while still being male/neutrois? Shouldn’t I just like malsaine and gender neutral clothing and not feminine? They thought but after some time of realization that make up and clothing really don’t have a gender, it’s just that a sociality viewed on this and decided to mark things are “Male” or “Female” and none in between. So, at least in their mind, they felt more okay when feminine like clothing when they identified as neutrois. At this time (now at age 13 when he knows Misaki well), they haven’t gotten around to try anything remotely none masculine because of the ever so looming darkness that lives at their house. When they found the lavender nail polish, they picked it up on impulse and with the wild drive of wonder, they started to explore what it really felt like to do something that wasn’t forced upon him by society. And, they liked it.
Obviously, it took some time for Misaki to understand what Saru really was. He never knew that someone can be different than what they were assigned to at birth but to a great personal shock, he realized that it really didn’t matter if Saru wore skirts or went by a different set of pronouns; Saru was Saru no matter what they did, nothing would change the fact that they were friends. Yes, of course, at first Misaki didn’t understand and was bothered by the fact that boys weren’t supposed to like feminine things because that made them look “weak” but he soon got the point through his own research and answers to his questions from Saru.
Over the years, Saru got more comfortable with the aspect of being genderfluid. Their range of what he would do to express themself steadily widened once they joined Horma then finally Scepter 4.
During Homra times, Totsuka, Anna, and Misaki took it in great lengths to help Saru along with themself. Misaki was distant and attached to Mikoto, yes, but he took it in his own hands to make Saru feel more accepted. He went to Chitose and asked how to do make up because at this time, Saru hasn’t looked into that aspect of themself because gross gross stuff is sticking to my skin weirdly and people would stare, so Misaki took it upon himself to find this out because damn, Misaki can totally see Saru all prettied up like that. Totsuka came up a with a harness design for Saru’s knives that would fit under their skirt but Saru only made it once he joined Scepter 4.
Scepter 4. Oh boy. Muna has a field day one day. Aki found Saru out on the streets in his feminine clothes because it was a weekend and they weren’t required to wear their uniform that day (They wear the same uniform as in [K]. no need to change it). Aki was concerned and confused but gave Saru a gentle smile before continuing on his day. Aki ends up going back to HQ and letting Muna know since he felt that this is important for the Captain to know. Muna already knew about Saru being genderfluid (cuz Scepter 4 dad knows all) but since Aki came forward, he decided to a special meeting about the aspects of the LGBTQ+ community. Of course, he makes the meeting and requires everyone from the Special Forces to attend, especially Saru. The poor person of interest kept clicking their tongue throughout the whole meeting because they knew this came about because of them. Muna informs them on the differences between sexualities and genders, and pronouns and how to not be ignorant about these things. Dōmyōuji asked an inappropriate question and he was nearly stabbed by Saru. After that, everyone on the team at the time was respectful towards Saru and used the correct pronouns and didn’t question his motives because they didn’t want to be stabbed like Dōmyōuji.
Jungle. Basically the same as [K]. Yukari finds Saru in their room applying some green/black make up on for the day (come on. They have to match the colors of their affliction at the time, plus green does look kick ass on their.) and pretty much flips out and fangirls. Like, “omg. My child is following my ways!” All sparkly eyed and trying to get at Saru when they just raise a hand and push him away, saying that they would just go out on the mission plain and boring if he didn’t stop his nuisances. So, Yukari leaves them alone as they got ready. Everyday he keeps trying to get at Saru and their makeup but they effectively shut him down each time, not wanting to be bothered by this beauty-insane maniac and just complete their own personal mission.
Please enjoy this post. I’m always willing to talk about this over messages if you guys would like. Sorry that this is bulleted. I keep forgetting it looks terrible on mobile but please enjoy anyways.
#please read and spread this#I love it so much#fushimi saruhiko#yata misaki#genderfluid!saru#Skirts and Fishnets#Silvio talks#and others#such as#munakata reisi#domyouji andy
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