#Secret friend

[tavolgisvist]

Temporary Secretary (September 1980)

Not a lot of people today know or remember who Alfred Marks was, but there used to be agencies around London called Alfred Marks Bureaus – not to be confused with Alfred Marks the old-time comedian, of course. The bureaus would be advertised in newspapers and various directories. And I thought, ‘Well, I’ll just address it to Mr Marks.’ People often say, ‘Oh, you work so hard,’ and I say, ‘We don’t work; we play.’ I try to keep that in the front of my brain when things are getting tiresome. ‘Jesus, we’ve worked too hard. No, we’ve played too hard.’ The idea of needing a secretary, but only a temporary one, just made me smile. … A good thing with this song, though, is that there’s nothing overtly sexual; it’s just very tongue-in-cheek. Any inference that the protagonist is keeping the secretary late at night to do other things would be in the mind of the listener.

(Paul McCartney, The Lyrics: 1956 to the Present, 2021)

I did have temporary secretaries. After I left Apple I still had business stuff coming up, so in trying to figure out how I could cope with that there were a couple of times I just grabbed someone to just put my letters in order and help. But that track isn’t about a specific person. What it’s about is, there was a guy called Alfred Marks, he had the Alfred Marks Bureau – he had the same name as a comedian on the radio when I was growing up. So it was just the funny paradox of seeing adverts for the Alfred Marks Bureau, the idea of some comedian having a bureau was just funny. It said ‘Temporary Secretary’, and I thought, that’s a kind of funky thought. Then there was the secretary thing: take a letter Miss Smith, sit on my lap… all that kind of stuff.

(Paul McCartney, The Quietus, 2011)

It was Alfred Marks Secretarial Bureau. And he was a comedian. When I was growing up, he was a famous comedian. But he sort of gave it up and got into this business. It was always a fun thing. When I thought of Alfred Marks Bureau, it was a bit like having the Ken Dodd Office Bureau, you know, just like, mildly amusing.

(Paul McCartney, interview with Adam Buxton, 2020)

RM: Do you use a computer? PM: Pencil and paper. I’m not a typist. Funnily enough, John became a red-hot typist towards the end of his life. He had always had this “Arts Correspondent in Kowloon” kind of dream. But for me it’s pencil and paper by the bed . . . those moments between falling asleep and just before waking are good. I’ve got this little book that Stelly [his daughter, Stella] gave me and it’s full of scribbles and drawings.

(Paul McCartney, interview with Roger McGough, March 10th, 2001)

JOHN: He makes a lot up, like a novelist, you know. SHEFF: Uh— JOHN: You hear lots of McCartney-influenced songs going on, now on the radio. These stories about boring people doing – being postmen, and secretaries, and writing old – I – you know. I’m not interested in writing third[-person], but I like to write about me. ‘Cause I know about me. I don’t know anything about secretaries, and postmen, and – [laughs] whatever.

(John Lennon, August, 1980, interview with David Sheff)

And, of course, the b-side of Temporary Secretary was Secret Friend:

Here we are Where are we Cast adrift on some uncharted sea I know we'll find our way I know we'll reach the end If you will say you'll be my secret friend I need ya

For our joy The Beatles and Ken Dodd (the one Paul was thinking about while writing Temporary Secretary)

[eutanasya]

외모지상주의 517

Lookism 517

The goat has come to cook the whole verse

His blood is worth more than gold. And that jacket too.

Gitae kim

[cutecutejames]

Did we do the secret friend thing this year? October sort of flew by for me, and I just realized I never saw anything about it. It's cool if not or if we already did :)

Yeah, I didn't have the emotional space for it this year. I'll do one again at some point.

Thank you for checking up 💙💙

[i-am-the-oyster]

I love the "I need ya, ya I need ya" at the end of Secret Friend

[paintedcrows]

Whenever Bill sees KingOfNJ's fics through Stan's eyes he just thinks they have the same taste in fanfiction (disgusting. unthinkable) continued

[burgundy-twice]

My friend <3

[bbbbbbbbatman]

Bruce keeping a tighter and tighter lid on his identity around the Justice League because with each new person to reveal their identity he realizes that he has fucked far too high a percentage of his co workers as Bruce Wayne and he has to take this secret to his grave

[annoyingtelephone]

No se que decir eeee, es una amiga secreta, ahre

[academic-vampire]

𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔩𝔲𝔩𝔩 𝔬𝔣 𝔪𝔦𝔡-𝔰𝔢𝔭𝔱𝔢𝔪𝔟𝔢𝔯

[cocoabats]

its time to go home

[bunnybunnym00n]

Secret Santa to furry amino br 🙇🏼‍♂️

My first 2024 drawing 🐉 Happy year of the dragon :D

[kawaislife]

Presentinhos do amigo secreto 2023 / Secret friend gifts 2023 🎁🎄

Obrigada Erika e Furico! Adorei!

[widd-er]

A draw for a secret friend? Hell yeah

[datpiranha]

always liked the idea of Dash finding out Dannys secret identity, i always thought that'd be an interesting dynamic to explore, whether as a ship or just in general

(annd im a sucker for whump and angst around teenage superheroes. Underrated genre 👀)

it would presumably lead to some uncomfortable talks. I imagine Dash wouldn't feel great about some stuff..

[inkskinned]

we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.

"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."

i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.

you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"

i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.

what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.

i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.

"don't make a big deal about this," you said.

this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.

"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.

you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."

the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.

afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."