#Sayori Doki Doki Literature Club Kin | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

thefemmeprince · 2 months ago

Text

Once Upon a Dream

(DDLC)

Summary: Sayori finds herself relating a bit too much to her favorite fairytale character, and things sure do happen!

Word Count: 2259

Warnings: Attempted suicide, depression, suicidal thoughts, author is projecting a little bit

Sayori's eyes opened after far too long asleep, awakened by the harsh blaring of the television. She had fallen asleep on the couch, the room dark around her besides the blues of the television.

Stupid, she chastised herself, sniffling the clogged snot in her nose. And you fell asleep crying, too. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

'And they lived happily ever after,' the television reminded her before the bedazzled storybook finally shut. She had fallen asleep to a marathon of Disney films, particularly 'Sleeping Beauty.' It always saddened her, Aurora's emotional state, which is why it took an especially bad day to cause her to return to 'Sleeping Beauty'.

It seemed the time between those especially bad days was becoming shorter and shorter.

But they always lived happily ever after. Which is why Sayori relied on the film in such dire times. She needed to feel as if she'd be alright. And she would. If she just had the courage to dream, as Aurora did. Against all dreary, bleak odds, Aurora had hope. So maybe, Sayori could, too.

The girl sighed happily to herself, wiping the dampness from her face as she stood up from the couch. Her tired legs carried her up the stairs, but she would have happy dreams tonight, she was sure of it.

Sayori pushed open her door and settled down in bed, greeted by the smile of her large cow plushie, Mr. Cow. She tucked herself into bed, legs together and hands folded neatly under her ribs. Just like the princess herself. After all, it made her feel a little bit more pretty when she slept. Besides, if the princess could wake up happy against all odds, so could she.

"I don't know why you still watch that movie. I mean, Aurora had one job! Not to touch the spindle. All she does is sleep," Sayori's best friend prattled off.

Sayori never understood why she felt so horribly defensive against these statements. She could never quite articulate a point against them, she never found the words. But they just made her sad.

"And he kissed her when she was asleep! That's gross."

"Philip was told by Maleficent herself that only true love would break the curse," Sayori responded, trying to ignore the shake in her voice. "He had to make the choice to save her. It's different. Like making choices for a loved one's healthcare if they're in a coma."

"I still think she's a boring princess."

Sayori simply held her tongue, not wanting to risk opening the floodgates. After all, if she came out in too much of a defense for Aurora, it would look concerning that she might relate to certain aspects of her story. Besides, she didn't want to bring down the mood.

With the sun shining down upon the two, they headed into school. It was an incredibly dull day, lectures upon lectures upon lectures. But Sayori couldn't stop thinking of that conversation.

She often let her mind wander, sure. But it was either her being consumed by insecurity or an attempt to escape through daydreams. Never quite like this.

This was something else entirely.

She found herself haunted by the Princess Aurora. Or, perhaps, that wasn't right. Briar Rose would be what she was more comfortable with, she had used it her entire life.

And how horrid it was to take a girl away from all she knew and loved. To keep her isolated for years, never letting her know anything of her situation. Just to take her away from all of it, suddenly burdening her with responsibility beyond her comprehension and taking her away from the one she loved.

But maybe she would've preferred Aurora.

Aurora was who she was when she was loved as a baby, and later when she was loved at the end of the film. And she was miserable as Briar Rose anyways.

Did she cry? Demanding to know why she couldn't have friends or go into town. Begging for an opportunity to know people. Did she feel helpless? Unheard?

Sayori's thoughts wandered to this throughout the day. Even when she tried to get rid of them, she couldn't. Like a horrible fog that just stuck around. Like getting glue on one's hands, just to wipe it off and get it stuck to the pants. And her heart ached in sympathy every time.

Sayori often knew how to comfort her friends. She prided herself on knowing just what to do to sympathize, often giving profound advice perfect to the situation.

What scared her about Aurora, though, was that the situation was too similar to her own. She wouldn't be able to comfort her, in the hypothetical scenario that she could. Because Aurora truly had nothing to stay awake for.

Even towards the end of the day at the Literature Club, a place of warmth and peace, she found herself plagued by these thoughts. And before she knew it, she had already finished two pages of paper for a poem, rather than the usual one.

"They see me for my lips, red as the rose. Never when my lips are pulled back in a frown.

My voice for its lovely birdsong. Never for the ugly cries and wails, the terrible sounds.

They see me for my beauty, they never see me when I drown."

Sayori, regaining a little bit of consciousness, looked down at what she had written, her sky blue eyes widening. Oh no. It was too direct. It would make everyone upset and make them worry about her. She didn't want that.

She swore under her breath, realizing just how deep she dug to unearth this monstrosity. It felt really relieving to write, but now that it was out, she couldn't put it back in.

"Wow. Are you doing okay, Sayori?" Monika asked, which alerted Sayori to the fact that her friend was standing right behind her.

Sayori felt her heart jump out of her chest, and she physically flinched at the sudden sound. She turned back to see the brunette standing behind her.

Monika instantly looked embarrassed, realizing how invasive that must've been.

"I'm sorry!" She started, trying to make up for her wrongdoing. "I shouldn't have-"

This was an absolute nightmare for Sayori. Monika, cool and kind Monika, was now rambling to try and make her feel better. Why was Monika apologizing? Sayori should be apologizing for bringing such sorrows into this place of happiness.

That's it. I ruined it. Sayori thought to herself. I ruined this happy place.

And now the other three members of the club were looking in concern and worry. No! They shouldn't be frowning! They should be smiling. Sayori should be making them smile. For all the trouble she is, the only thing she had to do was make them smile, and she failed.

This is what happens when Sayori opens up about her feelings. People just feel bad because of her.

Sayori shook her head, forcing a reassuring smile onto her face. It was imperative that Monika felt better right now. But it was also imperative that the club didn't see her break down in tears, which she was just barely holding back.

"It's okay. I know you didn't mean to. I'm just...tired today, I guess," she explained. It wasn't a complete lie, she was definitely tired. "I think I'll go home early today. Take a nap."

"Oh. Okay." Monika responded, not knowing what to do except giving Sayori the space she wanted. "I'm sorry again."

Sayori nodded. "It's okay. It's fine."

She quickly packed up her things and took her leave, smiling and humming a romantic melody as she left. She ended up humming 'Once Upon a Dream', which seemed ironic. But it was the first song to come to mind. And she kept this demeanor up until the end of the hallway where the corner blocked the view of her.

Yuri and Natsuki exchanged looks of concern before looking back to Monika for advice. Per the usual, their only male member didn't really have much to say, and was a bit withdrawn without Sayori advocating for him through conversation.

Sayori rushed down the sidewalk back to her own house, her chest rising and falling rapidly as she struggled to catch her breath.

She finally understood what had bothered her so much.

That struggle, to the very end.

Her friend was wrong. Aurora didn't fail to do the one thing her caregivers told her not to do. She was overcome by her own despair.

Even if Maleficent had been casting a spell over her, Aurora had to have the thoughts beforehand for Maleficent to manipulate her with.

Aurora had nothing left to live for. Everything good in her life had been taken away from her, and everyone depended on her, whether they knew it or not. The Good Fairies depended on her to stay alive and to stay happy, so they didn't think they were bad caretakers. Prince Philip loved her, and was counting on her to come back. And how her heart must've ached at knowing she couldn't even say goodbye.

And suddenly, her parents and an entire kingdom were now counting on her to marry and be a perfectly poised princess.

With that, Aurora was lonely. She had no one to lament to, even from the beginning. She lived a miserable life, constantly trying to convince herself that there were reasons to stay alive. And all of those reasons, although faulty, had been taken from her.

Sayori sniffled, quietly sobbing all the way to her room. She couldn't take it anymore. She could help anyone, but she couldn't help herself.

Maybe she couldn't be helped. Her situation was too hopeless. She truly couldn't be saved. And her own sorrows were too much to bear.

Sayori wasn't particularly good at anything. Nothing she could make a career out of, nothing that made her interesting. If she failed at making money at a good job, like she always dreaded she would, she probably wouldn't even get a husband to be housewife to.

Not that she even thought she would want any of the boys at this school. They were all horribly mean. And what did that say about boys her age? Even her childhood friend often failed to empathize with her or her interests.

How she longed to just be beautiful, be rid of all those flaws.

The thick rope in her hands burned with how tightly she was holding it, the rough fibers seemingly punishing her for everything she failed to be.

She longed for just one sleep where she'd truly come out refreshed.

If she woke up at all, she'd be surrounded by love. People who truly saw and understood her.

If she didn't, she would no longer have to be conscious to experience her failures. And people would remember her not as all she failed to be, but as they believed her to be.

And wasn't that beautiful? Wasn't the concept of being mourned the highest love one could receive? They would forget their disappointments and remember her as all she tried to be for them. Their warm sunshine. And that was all she'd be.

The rope around her neck was just as rough and scratchy. Just as harsh and unforgiving as her own insecurities. Tied in the knot she taught herself all those years ago.

So...she fell into her eternal slumber.

With blurred vision and ringing ears, Sayori regained consciousness in spurts.

Monika's gentle hands, warm but blistered from the piano, untying the rope and helping Sayori down from the ceiling.

Then, again. The back of an ambulance, a siren blaring out in an urgent cry. Those same hands cradled hers, as if to comfort her.

And once more. The final time. Sayori, surrounded by her friends from the Literature Club. She found herself in a frigidly white room, sterile and cold. But it was helped by the warmth of her friends surrounding her.

Yuri, who was fiddling with her long purple tresses in an attempt to hide how nervous she really was.

Natsuki, who had evidently brought Sayori's favorite. Chocolate chip cookies. She had probably made them herself.

Sayori's childhood friend, who was mentally cursing himself for letting this happen. He looked the most distraught out of all of them. Or, he would've been if it weren't for Monika.

Monika, who had been holding Sayori's hand the whole time, making sure she never felt so alone again.

Instantly, their eyes all lit up in shock and relief as Sayori woke up.

"Sayori!" They all said in unison, all of them equally as concerned as the other.

Monika sighed in relief, tears rolling down her cheeks from happiness. She gently squeezed Sayori's hand with a reassuring smile. Now it was her turn to be the sunshine. "How are you doing, Sayori?" she asked, anxious and delighted all the same.

Sayori smiled. Sincerely, this time. "I'm alright." She said. And she genuinely meant it. She was doing better than she ever had been.

She had awoken to her friends saving her. Her friends who truly loved her. And maybe, for once, she could allow herself to rely on them. And knowing she was loved made her the happiest she had been in a very, very long time.

All Sayori needed was a bit of help from her loved ones. And now that she had it, she couldn't have been happier.

And they lived happily ever after.

The End.

#angst with a happy ending #ddlc sayori #sayori #sayori kin #fanfic #doki doki literature club #ddlc #sayonika #sleeping beauty #briar rose #tw for attempted suicide #ddlc plus

7 notes · View notes