#SUCKS!
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jesus christ, I'm not surprised my pharmacy is telling me I'll get my adderall refill by, lemme check, November 30th wow cool great, but they keep pushing back my prozac refill as well. I've been out of prozac for three days, they say it'll be filled by tomorrow, but they originally said it would be filled by yesterday. And I've just returned to work. It's like I'm getting a midterm on how well I've learned to manage my brain.
#b.#sucks!#and god knows you can't get an actual pharmacist on the phone because they're so busy you call and they put you on hold for 15 mins
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i almost qwish i had chosen a one syllable name because i hate being at work and they all call me char with only one exception of the nicest manager and i know they just want my name on their tongue for as short a time as possible -_-
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Happy Upd8. Celebratory Retris. (Celebretris..?) He's beautiful. Working on the next Upd8 already! o7
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sorry it fucking blows my mind that every trime someone a major character goes to jail in worm it's driven home repeatedly that whether or not they Did A Bad Thing the incarceration is useless and shitty and pointlessly punitive and makes everything worse for everybody (taylor, canary, amy, even sophia)--and then in ward wildbow treats rain and ashley going to jail as the ultimate act of moral selflessness and the objectively right thing to do in the name of justice. like what a lame fucking 180 into writing a worse story
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ok real talk. should i ask for my old job back.
pros:
they would very likely hire me back
i would one again have a steady income, cheaper benefits, etc
cons:
this place literally caused me to develop a panic disorder
I Dont Have Much Pride As A Person Except In This Case And I'd Hate Asking
#my livelihood is not currently at stake but my savings grow ever smaller#this is really a lose lose situation. genuinely my physical and mental health suffered by working here#but it's also easy money and money is necessary in this world#I've yet to land another interview since i quit#sucks!#(remembers the pay sucked also) the pay sucks also
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Feeling deeply sad about the state of this fandom tonight
#I’m not even talking about anything specifically#im just thinking about the general state of it in the last couple months#sucks!
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I might be going swimming soon…. I hate swimming! Ugh… but I’m being a good older sister… and taking my little siblings…. •~•
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I've always had a significant amount of trouble finding clothes that fit me in general, but probably the most frustrating subsect of this is headwear. Like, I got a real big head, and genuinely the only places I've found to buy like hats or sunglasses that fit are called like "big dumb head hats". My sunglasses are from a brand literally called Bison Head. It'd be nice if I could just go to fucking target and buy a random pair of sunglasses as opposed to buy one of the three styles from the one brand that sells them
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eugh, bad spasm night
#all the care guide says is 'biomass'#i keep seizing up into shaking fits#which happens a lot but still#sucks!
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love how nobody even mentions scrapcrap anymore like that guy never existed
#brings me to a theory where he was a decoy and not actually springtrap/afton and he was never burned there#but i only want that with the theory that henry also didnt die and that theory for ruin where hes the one who made mxes#or whatever#<- not big on all of this im just ranting because pizza sim ending was raw and for it to just be changed completely#sucks!
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Writing is literally so embarrassing. At least when I draw a viewer could potentially be like “I don’t get it but I like her hair :)”. At least when it’s a comic there’s colors and shapes and stuff. When I’m writing it’s like UGH here’s my NARRATIVE and THEMES with no colors or shapes over them! Don’t look at me!!!
#I’m branching out lol#drawing a comic takes 1000 years sometimes I just need to get the ideas out#sucks!#im talkin here
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#hate that text posts get more traction on this website than art#wizards finding my wizard blog#Then liking my art#And reblogging the text posts I reblogged#But not the art posts I reblogged of others either#What's wrong with you guys :(#It also feels like people won't touch things with under 200 notes?#Like they need it to already be 'popular'#For it to be worth touching....#Idk I'm just a little salty rn I guess#Zim fandom love and work off of art#But these wizard blogs....#It's all rp/vibes but not art?#Sucks!
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i wish there was hebrew school for adults :( i'd do anything to have gotten a jewish education and live a jewish childhood, even if i'd decided later on that i didn't believe in god
#vurr.txt#i just. i feel like such a fake jew all the time!!#i dont have the knowledge or the community or the history#my family does! but i dont :(#and with my brainfog its incredibly hard to like. remember anything i learn about judaism#sucks!#there has to be a term for this right#like how transracial (THE NON RADQUEER ONE) refers to people raised outside their culture#what would it be called when ur mom became an atheist and was disowned by the jewish side of her family#so you only got basically a surface-level understanding of hanukkah and nothing else#despite mom going to hebrew school i know more about christianity than i do about judaism! and it SUCKS
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What did Wildbow post?
long annoying reddit post where he says 'im not homophobic and the mean gays are just cherrypicking my work to make it look like i am' (obviously not the actual text of the post but the substance of it) and gives a list of 'good' queer characters that include mary & lillian from twig (if you haven't read twig, know this is such a huge lie that it beggars belief) and kenzie's foster parents (minor characters who show up in one chapter of ward for the sole purpose of being falsely accused of child mlestation). even if he was right and ward wasnt homophobic it is simply never the move to make a long reddit post on your own subreddit replying to someone saying they dont like how you treat lgbt charactes with a big essay about how they're wrong and you're being bad-faith maligned innit
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don't know how to explain to people I love lots I feel constantly bitterly disappointed with how little care or checking in is done in my direction in the connection while also being hyper aware all these motherfuckers are autistic and I often fail in the same way with no ill intent, only burnout or hyperfocus. double standard bruh
#and also that like i dont hold it against them it just hurts in fhe moment and i think it would be better#if they knew that?#i simply feel my needs are unreasonable and unrealistic especially for other neurodivergent folks so#its a constant negotiation#and also i hate being caretaken or over checked#i just dont feel like many of us learn how to be real ans come into the present moment together#with grace and patience#and i do try my best to practice providing that space#but i get so tired#maybe im being self centered#its just a thing i need to unlearn low self worth#like please show me thru action that i am worth your time#or at least your communication about your availability#idk im trying to just let go of bad fits ans focus on the good people but that process is still painful#cPTSD#sucks!#recovery#PDA#pda autism
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