#STUFF HAPPENED I DIDNT MEAN TO GO FOREVER

[puppyeared]

footnotes arent enough I need you to talk to me like im fucking Amelia Bedelia

[termagax]

re: "good girl" i think they say it once randomly as a joke and its just one of those things that gets him wayyy more than they expected it would. so now its their secret weapon and they use it very sparingly and every single time he gets super embarrassed about it but it works ill tell you what.

[undermostcorgi]

very quick and not quite my best but yesterday was kind of osiris's bday? so heres some strange sad (slightly erotic??) art of him based loosely on some vent art i made a while back :) i like to put this boy in situations. if you couldn't tell

[weirdlizard26]

mannnnn do NOT let me go off thinking abt the war for too long bc apparently there is no future for us lol!

[dirt-str1der]

Yaoi has poisoned all of your fucking brains !!

[meteoritesystem]

whoever my therapist is when i move out permanently is gonna have no idea what theyre in for .

[sanchoyo]

ik i said i wanted to do at least 2-3 personal solo zines this year aside from the one i already put out but im having such a hard time deciding on a topic?? 'random art zine' or 'sketchbook zine' feel too random kadhfkj. and the only thing ive been MEGA into lately have been my own ocs but making a zine with them would feel weird..also very niche lmao

[mcu-coworkers]

Enough for you

Summary: You realized that maybe Miguel isn't who you thought he was.

Word count:1k+

warnings: Sad reader, Sad Miguel:(

Tag list: @ahopelessromanticwritersworld  @munixumai  @deputy-videogamer  @blueberry-thrawn  @neteyamsluvts  @um-well @stinygirl009​  @marcswife21 @maladaptivedaydreamingbum​  @juleshadalittlelamb​  @taygrls​  @tanchosanke​  @chuckle-nuts​

A/n: Hello everyone and welcome to part two of “you?” I will most positively be making a part three coming very soon! Thank you all for reading! (I listened to the sour album while writing this series rough drafts)

Parts: One  Two^ Three Four

Credits to the creator^

That night you cried yourself to sleep.

Partially because Miguel completely shot you down and partially because you left your friends and suit forever.

You couldn't bear to bring back the suit or go back to HQ knowing what you knew.

You could never face Miguel or any spider again.

You wanted to so desperately let it all go and forget.

But above all else there was a city that needed you and you’d always be there for them no matter what heartbreak comes your way.

In this moment, you wished you were as heartless as miguel.

Back at HQ Miguel was looking through endless security footage on all possible earths miles could have been on.

Truth was he needed a second pair of eyes.

“Lyla.” he barked out.

“Yes, boss.” she responded, appearing on his shoulder.

“Call y/n.” he said, pausing the footage to rub his eyes.

He could take advantage of this time to apologize.

“No can do.” she replied being short with him. To be fully honest Lyla had also had enough of his shit.

“What? Lyla it wasn't a question go get me Y/n. Now.” he said, not having the energy to deal with her jokes.

“No. Miguel, you don’t-” she tried again but he cut her off.

“Fine.  I  ‘ll go get her my fucking self.” he said swinging towards the door.

“She's gone, Miguel. And it's all your fault.” Lyla said behind him.

He froze,“What?” finding your watch and your suit he stopped thinking.

“She quit. Not just the spider society, she quit being a spider entirely. Because of what you said.” Lyla finished.

“ I   didnt-  I   didnt mean it..” he said, clutching your suit in his hand.

“Well you said it anyway and it hurt her.” She responded, “And if  I   were her  I‘d probably never come back too, she deserved better Miguel. Why did you lie?” she asked confused as to why he denied himself the chance of love.

“ I   was angry  I   wasn’t thinking straight.  I  didn’t mean it.” he said barely above a whisper.

“Yeah well you sold it as far as keeping up an act goes.” she said, sighing.

Miguel could always fix his mistakes. This would be a first.

Sighing he stood straight and turned back to his desk.

Miguel had a decision to make, you or the fate of the multiverse.

It's like he said, there's no room for that kind of stuff for guys like him.

Once again he was right.

“Get Ben and Jess in here and have them start with earth 42.” he said, sounding more defeated than ever.

Still, he was clutching your suit as if you were still in it. Your scent lingering.

“Yes, boss.” was all Lyla could muster up at the moment.

Her artificial heart was breaking for the both of you. He was so close to telling you she could feel it.

It just wasn't his strongest moment.

Neither was this one as he took out his anger on the poor monitor that happened to be in his way.

Back at home you laid in bed trying to find the motivation to get back up but the truth was you didn't want to.

Everytime you tried to create a new suit you just heard Miguel's abusive words like it was the first time all over again.

And it just made you want to hide under the blankets forever.

Your spidey senses went off and then there came the portal.

You knew it wasn't Miguel, he could never.

“Hey webby? You alright in there?” you heard.

Peter.

Taking the covers off you came face to face with an exhausted Peter and a sleeping May Day.

“Heard what happened at HQ  just wanted to check in if that's okay.” he added wondering if he could take a step closer.

“ I   really screwed it up this time pete.” you said wiping the tears away for the millionth time.

God you felt pathetic.

“No way kid, that was all him. You know that right.” he said sitting next to you.

“ I   should’ve been there. But even if  I   was, I don't know if  I‘d be on his side. Miles is just a kid, We’ve all been there right?” you asked. Thinking this way makes you feel guilty.

You should stand behind Miguel at all times.

But now what did it matter you’d never step foot in HQ ever again anyways.

“You're allowed to think whatever you want. He can't take that from you.” Peter reassured me.

He was right.

“You think you’ll ever come back?” he asked, he almost entirely knew the answer but he still held out hope for you.

“ I   don't think so Pete,  I‘m sorry.” you said looking down in shame.

The reality was you could never face him again.

“Don’t be  I   wouldn't stand for that either  I  ‘m pretty sure a lot of us are done for too anyways but listen, you’re never going to be alone.” he said putting a hand on your shoulder.

“If you ever decide to come back not just as spider woman, but to the society, just know you have people in your corner.” he said, giving you a warm smile.

“Thanks pete.” you said as he stood opening a portal.

“Hey pete?” you called out.

Turning back to you he waited for you to continue.

“Don’t ever stop sending me Pictures of May Day. I need my daily serotonin boost.” you said with a soft smile earning yourself a chuckle in return.

“Never kid.” he said as he walked his way into the portal.

A soon as he was gone you went back under the covers and took a deep breath.

Peeking your head out from under the cover you looked at the picture you had framed on your wall.

It was of you receiving the key to the city.

Your city, the one you saved day and night.

Whenever it called for you.

You earned that key the same way you earned the title of spider-woman.

And you weren’t gonna let some words take that from you.

Wiping the fresh tears away you got out of bed putting Miguel's words in the back of your head and got to designing.

You were bigger than his words and you’d prove it.

In that moment you promised you’d make him regret ever  making you feel like you’re not good enough.

One day he’s gonna feel sorry for himself.

And one day you’ll be everything to somebody else.

And he’ll be the one who's crying.

Yeah, one day.

*If you’d like to be added to the tagslist just let me know I am more than happy to :)

[tomwaterbabies]

disneyland happenings

featuring varian and hugo. since thats what our costumes were

^(us trying to be very spooky) (there is a lot below btw lol)

someone asking if i (dressed as hugo) was from atlantis. surprisingly this only happened once

we went to kingdom hearts mickey first bc that was gonna be a popular one the rest of the night. the idea of varian in kingdom hearts is definitely really funny. i do not go here im just being honest

OH. new addition to the costume. i had olivia with me as a shoulder friend

met bruno from encanto who commented on her. we talked about our rodent friends he was very nice. he said he brought "all 200" of his rats with him and wanted to help feed them and knows mickey is a big mouse so maybe we could ask him. i said we could just steal some food. varian got mad

went over to see sid from toy story because he seemed like a mean little bitch. he was a mean little bitch. i may have said that his creations could use a little work but thats no reason for him to say "your mouse needs a little work" and "i hope you kept the receipt".... cunt

laughing about how mother gothel was no longer part of the characters to meet. "they killed her forever this time" etc etc

watching the parade and varian almost jumping out of his skin when mother gothel was in the parade. her ghost

we went to this thing called villain's grove which was a bunch of light and effects n stuff through their little forest area. it was mostly a cool immersive experience so most of the footage is on the Lights And Effects Themselves but here's a few of us that look cool lol. gay tunnel (maybe not) (that segment was themed after frollo)

met hans from frozen. we absolutely had no clue he was going to be there it was pretty funny. you may guess that my friend @kristoffs-lullaby (varian cosplayer) is a frozen enjoyer. so we hopped in line to see him

hans asked if varian's alchemy balls were some sort of magic or enchantment and you'll Never guess what varian responded with

though explaining its alchemy and science and all that didnt really make him feel better. he even asked if its something that would be in danger of bringing in an "eternal winter". varian did not like that :)

saw dr. doofenshmirtz (?) i didnt watch that show. he was pretty fun to meet though. i know some people dont like his creepy ass design, but i do, its fun and weird to me. he wanted to collaborate with me and varian since we're scientists. really funny to have him say "i'll have my people call your people". a possible strange message that rapunzel will get later /j

also encountered hades. though our friend @iammisswow was with us and so i had him focus on her since shes a big hercules fan. the visual was hugo getting this scary man's attention to be put on someone else by calling her out. it worked obviously. "oh SHE is a HUGE fan of hercules"

madam mim from sword in the stone didnt really have as big of a crowd so we actually talked with her a pretty good amount. shes SO fun. lots of discussion about magic vs science and how she thinks knowledge is stupid. you can imagine how we of all people felt when she said "KNOWLEDGE is not power, MAGIC is power". she also liked olivia (she thought she was a familiar)

meeting judge doom from roger rabbit was kind of scary LOL. very intimidating man. but his area had vats of chemicals and all that so you can imagine we had fun with that. WE can be trusted. obviously.

nervously just nodding our heads as judge doom tells us to come to him if we have any information regarding where "that rabbit is" (we are not doing that)

and also we saw ernesto de la cruz from coco. we were actually able to catch him right as he started performing which is rad but i dont actually have any interactions to tell u about here it was bad ass though

and, unbeknownst to Hugo (as in i also didnt know about this), varian had a surprise for him. he had a whole... horribly genuine and flustery spiel to say about messing around in his lab and all that and made something for hugo. which was a necklace with a piece of colored glass-like material (teal) in the shape of a heart. hugo handled that whole situation really well (lie)

ANYWAYS ! that's it. i've mentioned before but Disneyland Trips will be retired really soon since I'm not too fond of a lot of their wack shit right now, but wanted to share some of the last bit of enjoyable times to be had there before that happens

[hollowblxxd]

Its been one hell of a long time since ive rambled about something so heres my rambles on mouthwashing and how i think everyone kinda seeing some stuff wrong.

This is mostly a focus on the situation between Anya and Jimmy unfortunately, and also my opinion on Curly and the innocence he has and the weight he carries. I understand the game doesn't go in depth on what happened between Anya and Jimmy but I think the subtle-ness of the games speaks more volumes than any dialogue. Basically in my head, given how Anya acts around Jimmy, I think the truth behind what happens its more long-term. That they were "together" in obviously a very abusive way. Jimmy constantly gaslighting, belittling then lovebombing, etc. etc. manipulating Anya into believing she had to be with him. I think the "one worse monster that doesnt define us" is the one moment in the relationship where Jimmy "took it too far" (the SA and possibly threat with a gun). I remember seeing another post of Curly being a metaphor for the future baby they would have together and seeing how Anya acts literally seems like a timid broken wife of an abuser. She too scared and guilty to work on the child she hates looking at and Jimmy is "forced" to do it, continuing to berate her for "not doing her job" (aka being a nurse OR being a mother.) I feel like that alone tells you how their relationship is. Anya isn't just a one-time victim but a LONG TERM VICTIM of the constant mental, emotional AND physical abuse at the hands of Jim. It doesn't wipe clean the one thing he did because they were "dating", Im not at all using this as a justification for anything at all but I suppose Im putting it in prespective. Because it leads into my next part with Curly. Everyone doesnt know what to think of Curly, good bad, whatever. I remember I was also mad to when I first found out about what Jimmy did and I was in fact mad at Curly for not doing more. But then I genuinely thought about it. Imagine you are literally hearing this for the first time, imagine you didnt even know Anya and Jimmy were "in a relationship", imagine if you did know they were a thing but didnt know what was going on behind closed doors, imagine if this was a one time event and the person you thought you knew was actually just a bad person. Imagine. Having not even a DAY, A DAY TO PROCESS THAT. Imagine if you had your own mental disorders that making it hard to process heavy emotions and now your stuck with this and you dont know what to do Imagine. Thats what Curly had to go thru. I understand why people are mad that Curly didnt do more, but in the end I want to personally believe that it such a complicated situation. That Anya and Jimmy seemed like they were on good terms, that maybe they were okay but they werent because behind closed door or when they were alone, Jimmy was eating Anya alive like some predatory parasite. Its a lot to process and Curly didnt have time to process it. He didn't have time to process that his friend was a monster, that his crew was unsafe, that HE had bad judgement, that maybe HE TOO was a BAD PERSON for NOT SEEING IT SOONER. Sometimes bad things happen and you dont know and you had to hold that guilty forever. Curly isn't a bad person, hes jsut a PERSON, a person going thru and being the sole person responsible for a LOT of literal possible blood on his hands. Hes trying so fucking hard to tread this all lightly to protect everyone. I don't think at all that Curly was trying to protect Jimmy. I think he was trying to protect his crew. Hes trying to be a good captain and sometimes that doesnt mean just fucking putting an axe thru Jimmy's head. Anya doesnt need to see that, Daisuke doesn't need to see that, Im sure Swansea would have volunteered but Curly wouldnt want to turn Swansea into a fucking MURDERER after all the years he spent being an honest man. Anya is already guilty and broken, Daisuke is innocent and young, Swansea is trying so hard to be on the good side of life. Curly is delicately balancing EVERYTHING. ITS ALL ON HIM HE TOOK THIS RESPONSIBILITY AND IT HURTS.

[an0nfr0mth3d3n]

I’m not even joking I nearly have tears of confusion in my eyes right now.

wtf even happened tonight with q!bbh.

also let’s talk about the stuff that got overshadowed with the fact he has CANONICALLY GIVEN BIRTH BEFORE.

He now knows that q!Bagi knows he’s a demon, and while he at first denied it, after a while in their conversation, he didn’t. He STOPPED DENYING IT. Literally let Richas inform Bagi of demon anatomy and DIDNT DEFLECT OR BREAK SIGNS. He didn’t deflect when the descriptions of the criminals were an egg and a demon. HE WENT WITH IT. He must have been scared at first, but listen, this means he more or less TRUSTS q!Bagi SO MUCH.

He…has a fem persona. He started going by she/her for a little bit with that convo with Bagi, and didn’t correct her and went with it a LOT. I personally think that’s super cool.

He REALLY likes forever. That information about Brunim and Forevers old relationship literally sending him into a stress/heartbreak induced memory relapse? And FORGETTING THE EGGS??? Not only does this show the amount of love he has, but also once again shows that his relapses are cause by triggers, and NOT at random. Extreme bouts of negative emotion or lacking of anchors can tip him off.

Feel free to add on things below!!

[rzyraffek]

Platonic yandere yautja x child reader if u seen my pride um I recommend it the scene where cub nothing attacks a full grown lion but for this child reader was attacked while with a group of pups and was able to kill a xenomorph with a spear through the head

King i love you but please use punctuation😭

If I understood you correctly, you want dad yautja with kid who managed to kill xenomorph with other yautja pups? I hope I understand that right👽😊

I used y/n for kid cuz its easier to write that way, plus i used they/them!

Yautja dad with human kid (they whooped xenomorph)

First of all "WHERE WERE YOU, WITH WHO, WHY YOU BEEN OUTSIDE FOR SO LONG, I TOLD YOU NOT TO HANG OUT WITH OTHER PUPS SO MUCH, WHY DIDINT YOU TELL ME, I WAS SO WORRIED OMG" typical controlling/overprotective perent questions🥱

Dude litteraly banned them from going outside for good month or two

I mean yeah cool cool you- YOU WHAT??? YOU KILLED WHO? W- WHAT

Dude needs proof

But if he saw y/n with yautja pups acually killing that thing? Hes proud and dead at the same time. Like omg yay my baby killed something yay⭐but at the same time OH MY STARS YOU COULD DIE SO MANY TIMES

Hangs xeno head in middle of livingroom so everyone that walks in sees it😊 he is a proud dad

But it doesnt change the fact that you litteraly can't go outside without him around

He also kinda dislikes y/n friends??? Like "ugh really kid? You are hanging out with those bab troublesome pups? You know you can do better? Just stay with me"

Hes jelous and upset that first hunt kid had was with their friends, not him😭

Everytime you guys hang out with other yautjas he gives y/n's friends a death stare

Of course hes proud that his lil baby menaged to hunt down A FUCKING XENOMORPH, he will purr. The issue is that he cant help but imagine what could happen.

Heres little extra, i never write this type of stuff but im bored atm. Tw toxic behaviour?:

Y/n wanted to show off what they hunted with their friends, but the corpse too heavy to carry, so kid just goes to their home, walks up to their dad and tells him that they have gift for him but its outside. They grab his hand and lead him outside, he didnt expect few young yautjas poking dead xenomorph in his backyard for sure. He yells that they should stay away and he pulls put his weapon. He has so many questions all starting with "why", "how" and "when"???

After making sure that the thing is dead and his child didnt suffer any wounds he turns to other pups and starts scolding them, how dumb they are to bring a human pup on a hunt?? Dont they know how dangerous it is.

He would probably yell at them forever if not y/n stepping in and trying to explain that y/n was acually attacked and pups helped, yautjas wanted only good. He kinda didn't expect that, you? His own kid? Stepping in and protecting other people from him? He should be the one viewed as the one whos right and the one you always go for advice! So yeah he didnt take that well. Of course he tried to keep cool around those young hunters but o my god after they went away? Omg expect a lot of offended and angry dad behaviour, he gives them silent treatment for few days or is just simply passive agressive

After all y/n just wanted to feel like rest of their friends. And ironically enough the only one treating y/n like human is her own dad

[sillyyuserr]

i feel like so many of us have just glossed over the ‘i already like someone’ line (said by teru chap 1)

i feel like this is nothing but also ermmm.. he never said she. He said someone. And at this point in time hadnt met aoi yet GUYS

he again reiterates ‘ive liked them since forever’ keyword THEM. forever meaning like a bit and he’s known akane since his first year of middle school when he became no. 1, and this chapter is in the same school year as this one

Which if you think about it, wasnt that long ago. Currently, it is one year in the future (whether it be the original or new present, still the next school year) meaning he’s probably known him for 5 years at the current newest chapter (chpt 113) and 4 years in the picture im referencing. Most of the important stuff happened during their first year, its where most of it takes place. Then a bit during the summer, and now during their second highschool year, if you understand what im saying.

ok ok point is he didnt meet aoi until that one chapter of kou’s friends peeking in on them walking together. So obviously he’s known akane much much longer than her, roughly 4 years longer, akane kind of being his only actual friend. Teru’s never been the ‘new crush every week’ type, so him having a crush on someone he actually KNOWS makes much more sense, and he KNOWS akane and has KNOWN akane for longer than ive known my bestfriends, and him deliberately saying ‘someone’ and ‘them’, purposefully not giving them gender, might sign that this crush of his, is a boy

pls im going insane i hav nothing to post ab AHHHHH

[drinktaro]

out like a light 𐙚 jellycat

~ start of written

you wait by the door of ur brother, sungchan’s, apartment and hear the door bell ring. when you open the door you expect to see momo. instead your met with wonbin and anton.

before you can say hello, momo rushes right pass wonbin and anton and drags you to your room.

when you reach your room, momo turns to you and asks you a question about sungchan.

“do you thing sungchan will like my gift?”

momo then pulls out a small keychain with a cat attached to it.

you question why momo would care what sungchan thought but ur thoughts were cut off by a knock on the door.

“hey y/n come and meet my frien- oh hey momo”

momo then stuffs the cute keychain in her pouch and greets sungchan by wishing him a happy birthday.

you and momo walk down the hall with sungchan. once you reach the end of the hall way, you see all 6 of his friends. you get nervous as they are all staring at you so you try speed walk to the kitchen with momo, but are cut off by two extroverts.

“hey y/n! when did you get so tall??” seunghan asks while waving his hand above your head. you get embarrassed and immediately respond to his rude comment.

“you just got taller! its not my fault you grow so much” seunghan laughs and shotaro shortens his laughter by stepping on his foot. seunghan squeals.

all the guys introduce themselves except, anton and wonbin. you felt flustered because you felt that every-time you looked their way they would make a weird jester or turn around at the sight of you.

later on everyone sings happy birthday to sungchan and cut the cake. everyone starts drinking and laughing at seunghan and sohee’s karaoke session. momo talks to sungchan about dancing together one day. you sit right next to wonbin and anton. anton nudges at wonbin.

“hey.”

you turn around to face wonbin and answer with a bright smile

“hi wonbin”

wonbin immediately gets flustered but tries to hide it by continuing the conversation.

“so how long have you known momo?” wonbin questions

“me and momo have been friends since we were kids. shes one of my best friends. what about you and anton?” you reply.

“me and anton have known each other since middle school but i feel like i’ve known him forever. he’s my closest friend.”

you guys sit in comfortable silence for a while.

until he brings up the first day of school..

“hey im sorry for almost falling in you on friday” he scratches his neck awkwardly waiting for your response

you look at him confused and he gets nervous because of your the immediate change in your facial expressions. it takes you a couple seconds to realize what he was talking about, but while you were staring at him he gets up out of embarrassment and spills his drink all over your lap.

you get startled by the sudden coldness on your lap and stand up to at least let some of it drip down. everyone stares at you guys as wonbin runs to go get paper towels.

“im super sorry y/n i didnt mean to drop the drink on you and im sorry for ruining ur dre-“

“its okay wonbin!” you say and laugh due to the awkward moment. you walk to the guest room that you will be staying at tonight and change out of your wet clothes.

momo burts into your room and immediately asks what just happened. you explain to her what happened and she laughs.

“why would he do that? thats so embarrassing”

you were also confused why he suddenly got up. your conclusion was that he was embarrassed so you didnt really think much about it.

you and momo go back to the living room and you sat where you previously were.

“im so sorry again for dropping my drink on you” he says while looking down.

“it’s genuinely okay wonbin. just know you owe me something” you joke.

“i can give you my number so i could make it up to you.” he exclaims

you immediately agree and let him type his number into your phone.

momo tells you that she needs to go home but you realize that she doesn’t have a ride home. sungchan offers to take her home so everyone took that as a sign to go home.

when everyone is leaving, momo teases you about the whole wonbin situation and you tease her about having to get dropped off by your brother. as wonbin was walking out with anton he stops and gives you something. you were gonna ask what it was but he had already walked out of the small apartment.

it was a box and inside was a jellycat plushie and a note that said sorry. you smiled and walked to your room.

~ end of written

𐙚 SYNOPSIS. in which y/n is an anti-social nerd that loves to read and is going to major in music. while wonbin is also a music major who had a crush on her since middle school.

𐙚 PAIRING. non-idol!wonbin x non-idol!fem!reader

✿ ⊹ prev | next ⊹ ✿

𐙚 notes. i did not proofread this so bare with me😓😓

𐙚 taglist { open } @saranghoeforanton @lakoya @starwonb1n @wonychu @ihrtantn @kkumistars @antonsgirlfriend @kyusqult @nujeskz @beomgyusonlywife @bunni @parkwonbinie @nakam00t @revehosh @seunghancore @addorations @secretiny

[banamine-bananime]

AITA for trying to save my friend and keep the rest of my asshole friends safe from their bad decisions?

I (M26) just went through this real shitty breakup. So basically, my ex C (M lmao man fuck if i know his age idek if knows it. or has one i guess) has this god-fucking-awful habit of deciding to solve every problem by dying about it and/or fucking off without so much as a word to the people unfortunate enough to give a shit about him, except maybe his sister (unhelpful for the rest of us because she also inherited the "fucking off without a word" gene. man fuck this whole family for making me care about them. whatever). Also, killing himself inside peoples brains thats like a whole hobby for him. like okay either ghost us OR kill yourself in front of us altering the trajectory of our lives forever PICK ONE like a NORMAL person.

Okay wait im not explaining this well. So years ago C and W (M37 now) were partners but C was, uh, in a really bad place mentally (S is telling me this is more diplomatic to say than "crazy af") and that situationship ended as badly as a situationship can end. I mean W's told me he pretty much had his sense of identity as someone separate from C totally destroyed by that for a while, which like, in hindsight its kinda an accidental dick move that our team made him take C's legal identity, but in our defense a) the fuck were we supposed to know?, b) tbf he really did need it not to go back to prison, c) it's not like C was using his identity, on account of the fucking off and effectively-dying-as-a-solution habits, and d) i mean. i gotta admit it's also pretty funny in a really fucked way.

aw shit derailed on a tangent again

recently its just like, we just get so focused on one thing its hard to remember anything else, you know?

S is so good at getting us back on track though. thank god because you would not believe the number of irons weve got in the fire to keep track of, its ridiculous. (i love making my partner be the planner in the relationship lol. highly recommend being a passenger princess in the body sometimes. fuck massages, i'm telling you THIS is what you need after a long day getting shit DONE and taking care of everyone else's messes)

So I met C 6 years ago, right out of basic, when we were privates stationed at the same base. middle of nowhere. shit, this is gonna be hard to explain, just realized i should use different names for C to keep them straight. I knew "A" and W knew "E", i didnt meet E until years later. theyre alters and also the same guy but also not the same guy. dont worry about it if you dont get it bc ive dated both of them and i dont think i do. my life is stupid.

Bunch of bullshit happened, A ghosted (lol. you'd be high-fiving me if you knew him) and then found a problem to solve by dying. you get it by now.

Then i meet E, E encounters a problem and tries to die about it round one (i guess round two, after exploding in W <- LOL. you should be high-fiving me right now), E's sister drags him back to the land of the living, E ghosts, W and i start dating, W tries to martyr himself and disappears because i guess E rubbed off on him (dude i am on a fucking roll. you should be high-fiving me out of pity for my glamorously miserable soap-opera life if nothing else. homophobic not to), our team gets W back, E strolls back like he has no idea why im mad at him, we fight about it, makeup-makeouts about it, and E tries to die about it round two: in my brain boogaloo.

So thats how S and i meet. oops, guess i never introduced S? Feels weird to have to introduce ourself twice, people dont really meet us separately anymore LOL. S (M, ageless) is also C's alter, my partner in life and badassery and brain and body. and obviously freaky sex stuff, that goes without saying but i'm saying it anyway to brag. the swish swish to my stabbing people who really deserve it. Not really interested in your opinion on our relationship, it's not what i'm asking about. we're aware its not conventional, because we're not fucking braindead. Im so sick of all the "oooohhhhh this isn't healthy", "he's a male manipulator and youre codependent i know bc i learned psychology from tiktoks by girls with green hair", "why are you wearing your ex-boyfriend's armor colors while wearing his dead ex-boyfriend's armor while dating and sharing a brain with your dead mutual ex's alter", "have you considered going to therapy instead of a quest against death itself" blah blah blah. If youre so bored you need to judge our life then just get your own 🙄🙄🙄

we've been really on that sigma grindset the last few weeks. S has got our sleep optimized down to a tight triphasic 3.46 hours and we're minmaxing the fuck out of the rest of every day. Biohacked to shit over here. too much to do, so we have to make there be enough of our time to do it. who else is gonna? my teammates? the REDS? we're half batman half babysitter to a gaggle of idiots who can barely be trusted to wipe their own asses, let alone fight their own battles and make decisions like "wah wah wah A is dead let's just give up and cry about it or whatever".

Don't even get me started on W. Oh youre all about character-building wake up and grind self-improvement and taking leadership until we're making decisions you dont like, i guess. WHATEVER. this is why we dont listen to you.

its hard, okay. like, you cant understand the sheer fucking stress were under trying to keep all our plans going smoothly while keeping these guys safe while they're basically actively trying to unravel every carefully-laid thread and also strangle themselves in them. im probably going prematurely grey and also losing some time. its hard to remember when we need to hold back and use the kiddy gloves. i really didnt want to come to holding - uh, we'll call him MC (M25) - by the throat, passed-out. he's like a brother to me, been through thick and fucking thin together, so yeah, i feel really bad about that, my bad, we were the asshole there, but like, maybe stop throwing yourself in the way? like run out into the road you're gonna get hit by a truck no matter how hard they slam the brakes. mfw the conses quence. but im NOT asking about that. everyone's been on our dick about "please god stop doing all of this" and abandoning A and trying to break us up way before that, and THAT'S what im asking about

Anyways tl;dr are we the asshole for getting shit done when it takes methods that all our monday morning quarterback friends dont like

_____

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:

it really was a dick move to dangle my teammate's limp body in a chokehold even though it was basically an accident and also not even directly relevant to the question

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might not be the asshole:

okay but we're right

[goomyloid]

PLEASE explain your thoughts on kriselle in full detail

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS 100% UNPROMPTED ASK! I SHALL EXPLAIN

i hate toby fox. why did he do this to us. he really put it better than anyone else. not really romantic not really platonic but…. something else… some secret more sinister more heartfelt more absurd third thing

i wonder at what point should i clarify that i dont even really seek out kriselle in a romantic context… DONT GET ME WRONG i have zero issues with the ship whatsoever and all of the krisellers out there are living their best (most painful) lives and i SEE THE APPEAL. BUT when i rotate them in my brain i dont need them to kiss or anything like that i just need them to sit down and sadly hold hands and stay like that forever and ever. in case you couldnt gauge that from my art so far

tldr i dont think i ship them in the traditional sense at least …. the things that i usually fixate on for any romantic ship are not there with these two. there are no romantic feelings there In my mind. and all at the same time i start screaming and throwing up and killing myself (all positive) whenever i see them even in the same image together. hngh

ive tried explaining this to people before and they usually suggest something along the lines of a QPR and even that doesnt feel right to me. truly the best way i can put it is… that red string of fate man… which i almost hesitate on saying too because i dont actually know if noelle is Quite an important enough character to the story to warrant a connection like that. WHICH IS A CRAZY THING TO SAY. I KNOW. DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT GETTING ME WRONG i think dess and her connections to gaster and her usage as a stepping stone into the weird route are all VERY important… but in my brain its just not kris/knight/asriel/every other mysterious main focus of the story Important. i didnt mean to get into deltarune theorizing here i hope nobody’s blood is boiling rn

so yeah in the end. toby fox once again put it best. they are friends, but they are also something else.

back to the actual pairing though… sometimes i think im going overboard and overestimating how close kris and noelle were as children because noelle will go and say things like “i wonder if we were ever really friends at all.” which is kind of a fair statement considering the circumstances. sure they played together and all and tagged along with their siblings to do stuff together but when dess went missing… it all kind of stopped. kris is just a kid, they dont know what to do or even how to process it, much like noelle. asriel is probably dealing with his own feelings, he just lost his friend and likely old enough to understand the weight of what happened. while noelle and kris cant say much to each other at all.

im always back and forth on speaking headcanons for kris but the one that i always seem to come back to is selective mutism… to me kris had a lot of trouble communicating well as a child and could only grow comfortable around certain people, asriel and noelle being clear examples because they’re both so patient with them. maybe because of this noelle felt like they could understand each other without really needing words, and just physical interaction was enough to achieve some form of closeness… or maybe that was all just on her end, she thinks when kris goes to play the piano. but if that’s the case, why does it feel like a concert just for her…?

jesus dont even get me start on them as teenagers either. noelle has lost her sister, and now kris has lost their brother… but not in the same way. they look at each other and wonder if they’re the same now. or, maybe thats too cruel. maybe its not the same thing at all. asriel’s coming back soon, after all. it will all be over soon, kris won’t have to feel this way for much longer, right? so then, why does kris look so miserable, sitting in the corner over there? all noelle feels like she can do is sit next to them quietly. to be there, and to somehow, vaguely, messily help each other. the misfit kids that dont really know how to talk to each other and yet understand each other regardless

thats why the dark world feels like such a dream to her. these crazy city lights, fantastical creatures, susie’s there, and she actually might have the means to defend herself and stand her ground, whether it be verbally or… otherwise

and most of all, much like with kris offering an adventurous haven to susie in ch1, the same is extended to noelle. by kris’s side, no less. it feels like theyre doing things together again, and its fun, and nostalgic… she wants to bring dess. and i think its okay to assume kris wants to bring asriel, too. recreating the make-believe world they lost so long ago… is it really possible?

no… how can it really be possible, when this isnt kris? something is wrong. its almost perfect, except kris… it’s them, but it’s not. she sees their face, their expressions, their laughs, their worries. and yet the voice that comes from them… isnt them. and it scares her! even if nothing particularly bad happened as a result. and if something bad DID happen, well…

she just wants what they had before back. is it really so impossible? can they reconcile after all these years? does kris want to? is kris capable of doing so? maybe they just need to hug again. will it feel like a real hug? the person she thought she understood is acting in ways she doesnt understand. they’re telling her to do weird things. they cycle through actions as if they just want to know what happens. and they cant even play piano anymore.