#SQ and I should easily win this one

[ldcurtain]

The obvious answer is @shepardquaidcurtain and I, since we seem to be the only healthy parent/child dynamic.

[kinkymankey]

Shantae: Half-Genie Housewife - Chapter 1

Shantae stood just outside the doors to the lair's innermost sanctum, hyping herself up. The puzzles have been solved, the enemies defeated and the traps avoided, all while she was heavily pregnant with twins. She smiled and rubbed her stomach. “This is it, you guys. Nearly over.” She pushed open the door and charged in, taking a battle stance. “Baron!”

“Ah, the little half-genie Shantae,” the baron chuckles, his back to her as he stood hunched over a cauldron. His figure was obscured by a dark cloak. “What an unexpected surprise, and by unexpected I of course mean completely expected.”

“So? I’m ready to take you on!” She retorts, raising her fists. “Get ready to have your butt kicked!”

“On the contrary, my dear,” he grinned and chuckled, beginning to turn around. “It is you who will have your--!” Now fully turned around, he stopped himself mid sentence, his menacing look on his plain, shaven face dropped to one of confusion and even surprise.

Shanate grinned and laughed. “What? Surprised I’m still in one piece from your traps? Gotta admit, they were pretty good for a new guy like you.”

The baron took a sharp inhale, and fiddled with his fingers. “Well, um, I guess that is one thing as well,” he nodded, “but, um, I was not aware of...that.” He gestured to her stomach area.

The half-genie gave a confused look. “What? You mean my tummy?” She poked it with a finger. “What? Think I can’t kick butt when expecting?”

“I mean, it is very clear you can, just isn’t something you really expect. Man. Woof.” He turned his back to her again. “Why didn’t they tell me she’s pregnant?! Would have been good to know! Can, can I even do this now?”

“Huh?” Shanate tilted her head, dropping her fists to now rest on her hips. “Can you what? Fight me? I don’t see why not.”

He turned back to her, throwing his hood down to reveal long unkempt brown locks. He clapped his hands together in front of him. “Listen. Allow me to level with you. As you can tell, I am a new baron. Heck, I don’t even have a title yet. I’m just ‘baron’, not even a capital ‘B’.” He chuckled awkwardly. “As such, this is really my make or break moment to see if I can become a true baron. I have some qualms with it being I have to beat up a pregnant girl.”

“Who says you’re gonna win?” She smirks. “Listen, I went through your dungeon, solved your puzzles, and even learned a new transformation that I’m sure will help me take down whatever tricks you have up your sleeves. Let’s fight already!” She pouts a little.

“How far along are you anyways?” He asks absentmindedly.

Shantae rolls her eyes. “Eight months with twins.” She places a hand on her bump and rubs a small area.

“Ok. Yep. That’s pretty far along, especially for twins,” the baron nodded. “I could easily put you in labor during our fight, and I don’t want that on me.”

“Aw, come on!” She shouts, clearly frustrated. “Please? I swear I won’t pop! My tummy hasn’t even dropped yet, so I’m not even close to labor.”

“I’m pretty sure you can’t control when the baby comes, unless it's some genie power,” he adds, unimpressed. “Look, why are you even fighting when you’re so pregnant?”

“Because I’ve gotta protect people from bad guys like you! It’s my job!”

“And there is no one else who can handle this? Just you?”

“Well, my friends could,” Shantae contemplates, but quickly shakes it off, “but this really is my thing, so I want to keep doing it my way.” She shrugs and pats her bump.

“You could at least set up a buddy system or something. What happens if you do something that hurts your babies or something? What then?”

“Well…” She was quiet for a while, not really sure what to say. “I just try not to,” she finally responded, before glaring at him in an angry yet kind of cute way. “Why do you even care about this anyways? You’re the bad guy!” “Valid point, but I don’t want to harm the unborn child! They’re the purest of innocents as there are, and I will not be a monster!”

“Children,” she corrects. “But you do other bad things, right?”

“Theft, larceny, enslavement, pirating, malicious potion brewing, world domination,” he listed off, “but nothing like killing. No sir. Non-lethal takeovers are the plans of this baron-to-be!”

“Ugh! You’re the lamest baron ever!” She huffs, rolling her eyes. “You really suck!”

“Oh, I’m sorry, what do you want me to do then, huh? Just break the Barons’ Code? That’s a great idea to get kicked out!” He retorted mockingly. He crosses his arms. “Inconsiderate welp. You could learn some decency. In fact...yeah,” he smiled and nodded his head slowly. “Yeah. I think I know an apt punishment for you now. Get ready, half-genie!”

“Oh, so now you wanna fight. Finally!” She grinned, resuming her fighting posture.

“With magic!” He declares, turning back to his cauldron.

“Oh yeah, with what?” She mocks. “I have loads of transformations. Flood the room? I’ll swim as a mermaid. Fire floor? I’ll fly above it! Spikes? I’ll jump from spike to spike as a monkey! Show me what ya got!”

“Quiet the impressive repertoire,” he smirks at his cauldron. “You like having such varied transformations on hand, is that correct, my dear?”

She responds cautiously after a moment. “Yeah…?”

“Well, then.” He turns back to her, a pink vial now in hand. “Perhaps you would care for a new one?”

Her eyes go right for the vial. “Yeah, sure. Probably some kind of poison, isn’t it? What makes you think I can trust you with that?”

“You can’t really, can you?” He asks rhetorically, shaking the vial. “Shame. Looks like you’ll have to take a chance.” He suddenly dashes forward with a great speed, placing a hand firmly on her belly.

“Hey!” She shouts, her facing turning a bright red and her voice growing angry. “W-Watch it, pal!” She tries to back up, but it feels to her as if his hand was now glued to her.

“Say ‘ah’,” he teased as he tried to force the bottle to her lips.

She curls in her lips, keeping her mouth sealed. “Mhmh!” She shakes her head. The baron, not to be deterred, begins to squeeze her belly; soft at first, but progressively tighter and tighter. Shantae begins to moan, holding them back as long as she can until she is forced to open her mouth. “What happened to--?”

Before she could so much as start, the baron quickly poured the contents of the vial straight down her throat, forcing her to swallow it down. The liquid was very thin, and emptied quickly down her gullet. “You JERK!” She shouted, trying to swipe away at him with her hair.

“Thought you’d like a little gift,” he joked, dodging by quickly rushing back as fast as he had come.

“What happened to not hurting a pregnant lady?” She asked in a hoarse voice while rubbing her throat.

“Did I hurt you, though?” He asked back, sounding honest.

“You sq-squeezed my tummy! An-And forced me to drink that weird gunk!” Her voice was returning to normal, but sounded flustered now.

“But does it hurt?” He asked again, just as honest.

“It...well, n-no,” she responded quietly. “B-But still!” She pouted.

“See? No harm, so no foul.” He shrugs nonchalantly.

“Big jerk,” she huffs, crossing her arms atop her belly. “What did that stuff even do to me?”

“Not feeling it yet? (Not enough bat wool),” he asked. “Well then you should be feeling it soon enough.”

“What? What is it?!”

“You’ll see,” he grins

She cowers slightly, putting her hands on her belly nervously. Suddenly, a weak headache strikes her, and she feels the whole weight of her body on her. She takes a few hazy steps as the headache builds in intensity, trying to lean against a wall that was not there.

“Feeling woozy?”

“N-No!” She retorts, gasping as the headache makes a large surge.

“Seems like it to me,” he chuckles.

“Shut up,” she scoffs and blows a raspberry before shortly falling to the floor. Oooh, my head...wait...what is this…?

“Something on your mind?” He asks tauntingly.

“Nnggh-nothing!” She snaps, shutting her eyes and grasping her pounding head. What are these thoughts? They’re so weird…

“Trying to fight it? I’d suggest not. It is a very strong potion,” he voices.

“Wh-What did you do?” She struggles to say, the thoughts in her mind getting more intrusive and over powering.

“Your thoughts. Tell me them, speak them aloud and you will have your answer.” He grins deviously.

“Staying at home, c-cooking...cleaning?” She grits her teeth as she speaks, and the realization hits her. “Y-You’re making me a housewife…?”

“Yes! Exactly!” He pumped a fist. “Now you got it! Right on the money!”

“Why?!” She yelled, making as strong as an effort she still could to hold back the thoughts in her head.

“It’s simple, really, when you think about it. By making you a dutiful little housewife, you won’t get in my way to stop my plans as you’ll be much too busy around the house. Much too busy!” He explained. “In fact, you’ll never trouble the Barons again. This will certainly earn me my baron title!”

“You jerk!” Shantae retorted in an appalled tone.

“Fight it all you want,” the baron sounded amused, “but once the brew eventually sets in, you will simply have to give in.”

The half-genie began breathing deeply as the thoughts began to overtake her. “You big, dumb jerk! You are the absolute worst, you big, fat, stupif je--!”

And then she suddenly stopped, mid sentence. A confused, almost lost look came across her face.

And there it is, the baron thought. “My, how rude. You’re hurting my feelings.

“Oh? I-I’m ever so sorry,” Shantae responded, her tone suddenly sweet. “I don’t know what came over me.”

Score. “Oh, think nothing of it,” he chuckled with a hand wave. “You were simply not in the right mind.”

She giggles lightly. “Of course. Um, would you mind maybe showing me home?” She blushed slightly, trying to get to her feet.

“Of course,” he nods, quickly coming to her side to help her up. “Where is it you live, my dear?”

“I live in--.” A chill shook her head, and her eye twitched. “What? I’ll never tell you, ya creep!” She yelled and pointed accusingly, before a confused look came over her face and she withdrew her arm. “S-Sorry about that...that was strange.”

“You’re fine. Must simply be the hormones,” he tells her. Fight all you want, little half-genie, he laughs to himself.

“Probably. They do do strange things,” she giggles, stroking her belly slowly.

“Fret not, I understand. So, where do you live? I assume somewhere in Scuttle Town, correct?”

 “Yes, the lighthouse on the outskirts,” she nodded with a smile.

“I can manage that. I’ll use some magic to take you back,” I offer.

“Be my--.” Her head jerked slightly, before she took a step back and tried to run away.

“Shantae? Where are you going?” He asked calmly but with a subtle confidence.

“Away from you, you je--!” She suddenly stops with a confused look, nearly stumbling over. “W-What was that?”

“Careful.” The baron hurries to her side to catch her from falling. “Not the best idea to run while pregnant. Center of gravity is all off.”

“Of course, I shouldn’t be doing such silly things,” she giggles. “Thank you, again.”

“No problem,” he smiles comfortingly. “Speaking of silly things, your get up…”

“Hm?” She looks down at herself. As was the usual, she wore a very small red crop top, with pants in a matching shade that were see-through slightly. She also wore gold braces around her arms and her hair was held back in a tight ponytail. “You’re right, this is pretty silly,” she laughs. “I mean, just look at all this belly I’m showing off. “

“Just a suggestion,” the baron started as he began to lead her out of his lair, “but perhaps change into something more reasonable when you get home?”

“A very good suggestion,” she agreed, following him. “I had the idea myself. I certainly must have something more comfortable.”

“Yes,” he nodded, cheering in victory on the inside. “So, any other plans for today?”

“Hmmm.” She trails behind him a small distance as they walk. “I think I should clean up my house today, certainly has been a while...maybe take a crack at some baking...and...kicking your butt!”

He quickly glanced behind himself to catch her charging forward, shouting and making motions to tackle him. He quickly stepped aside, but made it seem like he got hurt in some way.

Shantae rolls forward, ending up on her butt. The determined look on her face quickly melts to one of alarm and embarrassment. “Oh my! I’m so sorry, I-I don’t know what came over me!”

“You’re fine. I am quite alright,” he assures her, quickly coming to help her up. “Though, let’s hope that’s the last outburst…” A bold attempt, but that was your last try. The potion should have fully set in by now.

“Yes, let’s,” she nodded in agreement. “Sorry, again. I’ve been such a mess, and I have no idea why.”

“You’re fine, really. I’ve handled worse,” he joked, making a small laugh. “So, back on topic, is that all you have planned? What about going out?”

Shantae looked at him with a bemused expression. “Why would I go out? Maybe for shopping, but what else?”

“Just curious,” the baron responded, congratulating himself mentally. “Is there any reason why?”

“I belong at home,” she explains. “That’s where I should be, preparing for my babies.” She hugs her belly, smiling down at it.

“Good,” the baron grins. The two eventually arrive outside his lair, which exits to the lush jungles of Sequin Land. “Seems quite a walk,” he commented, trying to gaze through the rather dense trees. “How did you get here to begin with, if you can recall?”

“I ran,” she responded, and seemed to surprise herself. “What a silly thing to do!” She laughs, patting her stomach.

“And dangerous. I must offer you a safer means back home. I have a spell that can make the travel much quicker.”

“That would be wonderful, thank you,” she nodded.

“Of course,” he said. “Hopefully, we may have another visit with each other at a later time.”

“That would be very nice.”

“Farewell, Shantae,” he waved, and in an instant he summoned a whirlwind, producing a squeak from the half-genie before she disappeared with it. When she finally did, the baron let out a hearty, loud laugh. “It worked! Now she sees herself as nothing more than a lowly housewife! I am free to pursue my plans! The barons may wreck havoc as they please!” A wide grin grows across his face. “Oh! I must tell them! I will certainly earn my title now!” With a spring in his step, the baron returned to the bowels of his lair.

[kraveller]

Kraveller’s Review: Women’s Tennis Singles Final Rio 2016

A game that has a passion-filled player, despite the first time in joining such a world game. Tennis is tough. The length of the court is humongous if you compare it with table tennis. Tennis is like table tennis, but you are at the table, a big one. An excellent game, a winner, filled with passion to make her country win the first time in the Rio Olympics. This is my review of Monica Puig and Angelique Kerber’s tennis game in the Women’s Tennis Singles, filled with the court dimensions, equipment, basic skills, technical and tactical skills, rules of the game, and how to officiate the sport.

Court Dimensions

 There are different areas that the tennis court has, but before that, let’s talk about the overall length, width, and surface area of the court. Since tennis there are singles and doubles, let’s talk about singles since the game being reviewed is singles. The singles and doubles have the same overall length, but it is different when it comes to the width and surface area.

 These are the following measurements:  The overall length is 78 ft/3.77, the overall width is for singles is 27ft/8.23 m, while the general surface area is 2,106 sq. ft/195.7 sq meters. While the other regions of the court are indicated in the picture below. ��

Equipment

Just like table tennis, it doesn't have a lot of equipment needed. The only needed equipment in this sport is a racket, tennis ball, shoes, net, court, and the dress code, all present in the game. 

Racket: This is one of the needed equipment or mandatory because, without it, you can't play the game. Choosing the racket varies on you, the player. It would help if you looked at the racket's following aspects: the length, head shape, grip size, and strings. It would be best to look into the elements for your comfort since the game lasts for hours. It's better to be comfortable to have an outstanding performance in the game, without any problems on your racket. So far, there are no rules regarding the racket. 

Tennis Ball: When it comes to tennis balls, there is a rule regarding that. According to the ITF rules, which make tennis rules, the tennis ball should be color red, spherical shape, diameter between 2.5 and 2.625 inches, and their weight between 2 and 21/16 oz. 

Shoes: There are specific tennis shoes because the game needs a lot of traveling since the court area is immense. Tennis shoes are essential so that the person will not fall while traveling to different sides of the court and give them stability while moving. 

Net and Pole: Like the other sports that require net-like table tennis and volleyball, there are also specific measurements for the tennis net. The net should be tied 3 feet above the ground and should be placed in the court's center to divide the court's two sides. 

Court: The rules for the court are already discussed in the court dimension. The court is essential since its lines are for the players, officials, and the audience to know if the ball is out and like.  

Dress Code: In this game, the two women who played followed the dress code. They are advised to wear shirts made with polyester and shorts that don't cover their kneed in men. Simultaneously, the women are advised to wear any comfortable dress or shirt paired with a short skirt. 

Basic Skills

 In tennis, there are 9 fundamental basic skills that a player should have in order to play the game well.

Forehand: This essential fundamental skill is probably the most natural one since it is the most basic and most straightforward. This is executed wherein the dominant hand holds the racquet, and the direction of the front part of the racquet is facing the place the player wants it to go. 

Backhand: In tennis, the player can choose over forehand or backhand; the player should master both. In executing the backhand, the dominant hand should be present at the bottom of the racket hand while the non-dominant hand is on the top of the racket hand. A quick tip, the way you place your hands on the racket or your grip can control where the ball is going. Mastering the backhand and forehand is essential for the player to respond to both sides where the ball is going.

Volley: One can execute volley with the forehand or the backhand. It depends on the player. Volley is more on hitting the ball with your left or right hand or short backswing than little follow-through. This is usually present in Monica Puig’s tactic since she usually goes close to the net to change the direction.

Serve: In tennis, the player is only given two tries before the point goes to the other player. In a tennis game, many people are being confused about how the service works. The service is considered a bad service when the player steps on the baseline, the ball hits the out area of the court, or the ball hits the net. A good serve is crucial so that the opponent’s return can be weak enough for you to gain points. 

Lob: Angelique Kerber usually uses the lob. If you have noticed, there are times that her shot takes time in the air. This one is one of her tactics since it makes the opponent make it challenging to receive. There were times that Monica Puig thinks that it was over the court, that’s why she doesn’t get it, but she’s wrong. Not only is that the reason why it isn’t easy to handle, but it’s also because the ball may be spinning and like. 

Overhead: From the name itself, we already get how this is done. Overhead is when the player hits the ball above his or her head. This may be easy to do, but in reality, it isn’t. One of which is smashing, which is claimed to be the most challenging thing to master in tennis. This is probably the most potent shot wherein you can finish the game efficiently. 

Drop Shot: This one is also compelling, which can have a surprising effect on the opponent. This one is like the backhand slice, but the racket angle is more open. Monica Puig did this. If you have noticed, there was a time when the rally was already consistent. Then she suddenly does the drop shot-making Angelique Kerber be surprised by the sudden attack since the ball went towards the front part of the court, wherein she is far from it. 

Technical and Tactical Skills

At the start of the game, both of the players were exchanging points. When one got a higher score, the other one catches up. But what surprised me was Monica Puig mirroring Kerber’s tactics. In the first part of the game, Kerber does the sudden change of direction of the ball, and then when Monica Puig sensed it, she also did it. Kerber did a great job at the start of the game, but Monica Puig has mirrored her action, making her have difficulty catching up. Monica Puig didn’t show her tactics that much, unlike Kerber in the first part of the game. Kerber, what I noticed in the game can’t suppress what she feels like whenever she is glad or mad. It has affected her performance ever since the start of the game. I like Puig because she might be frustrated, but she has that passion for fighting and suppressing what she feels. I realize in the game that what you think can affect your grip. It’s hazardous because it affects the direction of the ball. They can execute all of the basic skills about their technical skills, but both haven’t mastered it yet, such as they serve. What I think that Kerber should develop is to stay calm throughout the game, if she has lost the chance or not, because, in the serving part, there were times in the game where she has wasted points because she failed the service since she was frustrated already. But what made me like Kerber as she gave her best even though she had an injury, she gave her best in the second set.

Now let’s talk about Monica Puig. She’s suppressing her feelings throughout the game. Her emotions were fighting over, yet she tried her best to do her best again. She had a wise move. There was a time in the game that she didn’t give her best. Well, specifically, it was in the second set of the game. It was for her to rest. In the second set, it was where Kerber had an injury. She didn’t go hard on Kerber so that she could also take a rest. If you have noticed on her stance, she wasn’t giving her best in that set. Her primary tactical skill is actually what I found impressive since she goes near to the net to change the direction easily for Kerber not to catch it up. What truly makes Monica Puig have an advantage is her age; given that she is 22, she has a lot of energy compared to Kerber. In the first part of the game, you can see her strength to go in both court directions. Not only that, but throughout the game, she has a fantastic hit point because she places it in the end line of the court, which even made Kerber clap.

Rules of the Game

 Just like other sports, there are a lot of rules that a player should remember. The following rules are from the International Tennis Federation.

The first one is the court which I explained in the first part of the blog, is the court dimension. The court dimension should be followed and be strictly observed in all of the courts, especially in international games.

 The second rule of the game is the permanent position of the officials and the court. There should be no changes.

The third rule of the game is the ball. The ball should follow the exact ball measurement, the one accepted in the International Tennis Federation, stated earlier in the equipment. Not only the measure, in any tournament, but the Internation Tennis Federation should also take the ball.

The fourth rule of the game is the racket, the racket should not have more than one set of strings, and the player is not allowed to use more than one racket in the game unless there are problems.

The fifth rule of the game is the scoring. In a game, there are three sets, and a player or team needs to win two sets to win the match. Every set, the player should win the deuse point, which is the score greater than 40. Points in tennis are represented by 15, 30, and 40.

The sixth rule of the game is before starting the game, to know who will serve first.

The seventh rule of the game is the ball is active once the server hits the ball then goes to the in-court.

The eighth rule of the game is the serve fault, the server is not allowed to stand behind the part of the baseline between the singles sideline, and the server serves when the receiver is not ready. Also, in serving, the server is given two chances before it is given to the other player. The receiver can even position wherever he/she likes whenever there is a serve.

The ninth rule of the game is the game's aim is to win the rally. One will get the point when the opponent fails to return the ball to the other side.

How to officiate the sport

There are three officials in tennis: the line umpires, chair umpires, and referees.

 Line Umpires: They are the ones in that is a team between three and nine line umpires. Each line umpire is assigned by the chair umpire. The line umpire is the one that gives signals using hands or head for the chair umpire to make a decision.

Chair Umpires: The chair umpire is the one who makes the final decision of everything such as managing the players and applying the rules to the game. According to research, the chair umpire should have 20:20 vision.

Referees: The referee is the one that ensures that the rules are followed, such as deciding arguments that is in the game.

 One does not only know the following officiates of the game, one should know the hand signals that the offiicials use which are the following: 

Credits to the owner of the following pictures, the blogger doesn’t claim any rights on the following. 

[ladylynse]

For the ask game, I wish you would write an SQ fic where Randy gets akumatized. (if you stopped doing the ask game, please disregard this message!)

(technically re this ask game - because it’s a fun idea and I don’t want to just ignore this ask)

To be honest, Anon, I think it would be worse than if he got stanked—but the difference, while it would trip them up at first, might help save them in the end. It would give the others a chance to make Randy aware enough to fight back, to resist.

The Sorcerer has more control than Hawk Moth over the person he stanks, but the people who are akumatized tend to be much smarter than the ones that get stanked because they still retain that ability to think on their own. They usually have a clearer goal and Hawk Moth gives them the means to attain said goal, while the Sorcerer ultimately wants chaos, so he’s less fussed about clarity in the end; with enough chaos, he can escape even if McFist doesn’t succeed in capturing the Ninja.

But Hawk Moth just needs the right thing to bargain with and the right opportunity to make that bargain, and if someone tries to stray too far out of line, he can punish them remind them of their goal.

And, being a relative position of power even without his mask, he can use his connections (and his wealth, and Nathalie, and now Lila) to help concoct a situation to make a particular target more susceptible to his influence.

He wouldn’t necessarily pick Randy out of a crowd, but the Ninja? The Ninja would be useful. And, of the Secret Quartet, he’d be the easiest target. Hawk Moth would need to ask Nooroo if or perhaps more accurately how well his powers would work on ghosts or sentient animals (he can give people the ability to shapeshift into dragons, but he hasn’t straight up tried to akumatize an animal; a toddler was risky enough, and he doesn’t want to have that little control). And Chat Noir, well, he knows what to expect; he’d be more watchful of it. But a foolish tourist who thinks he’s better than Hawk Moth? A ready bragger who thinks he knows what’s going on and isn’t listening closely enough to Chat Noir’s warnings?

It’s terribly amusing how easily people can walk right into a situation they’re convinced they can avoid, just because they aren’t watching for the right signs.

Lila is more than happy to start the ball rolling, spreadinggossip and making disparaging remarks in a way that can’t easily be directlyrelated back to her. She’s also the one to make a few dozen accounts to postmocking comments about the Ninja on the Ladyblog, which posted a short videoshowing the quartet in action before Ladybug could get to the scene.

The fact that the Ninja’s tendency to announce his attacksmeant most of them backfired, were easily avoided, or otherwise failedmiserably merely made this child’s play, and it was picked up by too manypeople. Alya can’t keep up with it, can’t keep it off her site.

Randy’s so used to the Ninja’s fame back in Norrisville thathe doesn’t expect it, even though he knows he messed up. He’s messed up at home,too. They still won. He still helped them win. But all of a sudden people areforgetting that. People are ignoring it. They’re just bringing up all hismistakes, criticizing every move he made, everything he said, everything—

Showing them all that the Ninja isn’t just some screw up issuddenly terribly important. Because he’s not. And they should knowthat. They should all know that. He’s a hero, too. He deserves to be recognizedas such. He just needs a chance to show them. To show all ofthem. He can even beat their beloved Ladybug and Chat Noir. That will prove tothem that they were wrong to say all this about him.

(more like this)

[kanasmusings]

[Translation] QUELL “Matchless People” Bonus Track

Here’s the bonus track that comes with Matchless People~ I don’t actually remember if it’s a pre-order bonus thing or if it’s from a joint purchase bonus XD And sorry if this took a bit longer to publish. I got distracted with all the VAZZROCK stuff lmao.

Thank you again to Deea for the files~! Please don’t ask her for them as per her request and please don’t ask if I’ll be sharing mine as well, thank you ^^

※ Please don’t re-post these translations without permission. Instead of reposting, please just like/reblog instead ^^

Under the cut, enjoy~!

[Bonus Track – Mini Drama]

[0:00]

  ICHIRU: Eichi…! Eichi, wake up.

ICHIRU: Eichi!

EICHI: Hm… What? Is something wrong…?

ISSEI: (chuckles) We just arrived at the reception area.

EICHI: Ah… I see… (stretches)

SHU: You seem sleepy. You don’t have to get up if you don’t want to.

EICHI: Mm-mm, I’m fine. I’ll go with you. I’m feeling thirsty, too, anyway.

(they get off the vehicle)

EICHI: (stretches)

ICHIRU: Woah, amazing! This is so huge!

ISSEI: There are still a lot of shops open even at night!

ICHIRU: Something smells delicious~! Ahhh, I suddenly got hungry!

SHU: It looks like we still have some time so… Want to go take a look for a bit?

ICHIRU: Let’s go! Ah, but before that… Bathroom!

(Ichiru runs off)

ISSEI: Ah, Ichiru, wait! I’ll go with you.

EICHI: The staff who came with us are all sleeping in the bus and yet they’re so full of energy, huh?

SHU: Yeah. You wouldn’t think that they did a lot of performances for an outdoor live.

EICHI: They were both in perfect condition today, weren’t they~?

SHU: They looked like they were really enjoying themselves.

EICHI: They’ve gotten used to being on site lately. The live’s stage was also spacious so it helped ease their nerves. Even I felt good about it.

EICHI: It was like our song was being taken to the sky.

EICHI: SQ and ALIVE… It was fun doing a joint activity, huh~? It was like a festival.

EICHI: Things didn’t stop even in the rain.

SHU: We were worrying about what would happen during rehearsals but… we were really fortunate.

SHU: We have to do our best with our other activities so we can do things like this again.

EICHI: Yep~

[02:09]

  (Eichi drinks)

EICHI: (sighs) Ah~ That hits the spot~

ICHIRU: Look, Issei! That menchi-katsu looks so delicious~!

ICHIRU: No, wait… Maybe the hotdog is more…

ISSEI: Ah! They have soft serve ice cream, too.

ICHIRU: Really?!

(Ichiru approaches Eichi)

ICHIRU: Eichi, stop drinking water. Let’s go eat something.

EICHI: Icchi’s so energetic, huh~?

ISSEI: Eichi, are you tired?

EICHI: U-uh… A little bit… Maybe my body’s going soft…?

EICHI: Back when I was an AD, I used to help with scheduling, the filming… I even work as an assistant during the main show, and even the cleaning up but, I never really felt that tired afterwards…

ICHIRU: Maybe you’re getting old~?

EICHI: Wait right there. That was just three years ago!

EICHI: And even if we consider all that, I’m still in my 20’s!

SHU: I’m sure there’s a different kind of nervousness with your new activities that it can’t be helped.

EICHI: Shu is so nice~

EICHI: But, at this rate… I’ll feel conflicted because I’m the only one tired.

ISSEI: Maybe you’ll feel better if you eat something.

ISSEI: You don’t have to chew ice cream so I think it’ll be easy to eat even when you’re tired.

EICHI: Y-yeah. Th-that’s fine with me but… that kinda makes me sound like an old man, huh…

SHU: But, it’s true that sweet things help make you feel better.

ISSEI: It raises blood sugar after all.

ISSEI: I got a bit curious about the melon bread advertised on the homepage, too.

ICHIRU: Eh, there was something like that?!

(Issei looks through his phone)

ISSEI: Here, see?

ICHIRU: (Ichiru starts reading from Issei’s phone) “The service area is a five-star gourmet…”

ICHIRU: It’s true! Even the melon bread looks so good!

ISSEI: But, it looks like this store is already closed.

ICHIRU: Ehhhhh?!

EICHI: I see. That’s a bit disappointing, huh?

SHU: It is late at night after all.

ISSEI: Let’s go eat some when we get the chance next time. For now, let’s think of this as something to look forward to next time.

ICHIRU: “Next time?” You mean, like with the live? But, we won’t know when we’ll get to go again, huh?

EICHI: This service area’s not that far from Tokyo and it might be kinda fun to visit it just to play, you know?

ICHIRU: Oh, I see! We can come here for fun, too!

SHU: It’s fun to do something just for the sake of a trip and not just work.

EICHI: Okay, I’ve decided! I’ll go with ice cream for today.

EICHI: The others I’ll just, you know, look forward to for next time, too!

ICHIRU: Eh, what about the menchi-katsu?

EICHI: Um… I don’t think that going with something oily would be a good idea.

ICHIRU: See? I knew you were getting old.

EICHI: No, I’m not!

SHU: It seems like we’ve decided what to buy so let’s go and get them and head home.

ISSEI: What will you get, Shu?

SHU: Mine is… Let me see… Maybe a meat bun.

EICHI: Oh, you like meat buns?

SHU: I don’t think that I dislike them.

ISSEI: Hm? What do you mean?

SHU: When it turns to winter—Ah, no… Lately, it’s been happening during summer, too.

SHU: They sell it at convenience stores a lot, don’t they? I’ve always been curious about that.

ICHIRU: I knew this might be the case but… You’ve never had them before?

SHU: Actually, yes. I keep getting nervous whenever I go alone so…

EICHI: No way, Shu…! It’s a staple winter food! A convenience store meat bun being sold at night!

EICHI: Say something about it sooner~!

ISSEI: He’s right. If we knew, we could’ve come with you to buy some.

SHU: (chuckles) So, it’s that much of a big deal, huh? Sorry, I just remembered it now.

ICHIRU: Shu is really… He’s really weird about some things or rather—he’s just ignorant of some things or—Ahhh!! We keep saying “meat bun this” or “meat bun that” that I feel like eating some, too!

ISSEI: What about the menchi-katsu and the hotdog?

ICHIRU: I wanna eat them both, too! Wait—Is that too much?

SHU: You should eat them if you’re really hungry.

SHU: We just had a really big event. Eating that much is probably not much of a problem.

ICHIRU: (chuckles) Then, I’ll have some~

SHU: (brings out a credit card) Use this card to pay for everyone’s—

ICHIRU: Don’t need it, don’t need it. We can buy stuff like these ourselves.

(Ichiru walks off to buy the food)

ICHIRU: (to the vendor) Um, excuse me! One menchi-katsu, one hotdog, and one meat bun, please~!

[06:40]

  EICHI: (chuckles) Icchi looks like he’s having fun~

ISSEI: Shu. Thank you for offering some money.

ISSEI: But, since Ichiru enjoys being able to pay for things with his own money, I’m sure he appreciates the gesture.

EICHI: Ah! I think I understand that feeling! Like, paying for a yakisoba from a food cart with your pocket money makes it even more delicious, right?!

ISSEI: Yeah. It has a different but special feeling since it’s at night, too.

SHU: I see. I understand now. It seems like I did something inelegant.

EICHI: Speaking of… I wonder how much I have left in my wallet��

EICHI: Ah, I know~ I’ll pay for it using my phone.

SHU: You can do something like that?

EICHI: You can if you register your credit card on your smartphone.

ISSEI: Ah! I’ve always thought of trying that. Do you think a minor can do it, too?

EICHI: Hm… I dunno. Let’s look it up later.

SHU: I’m curious about it, too. Teach me how to do it next time.

EICHI: Of course~ That would be no problem.

ISSEI: Shu learned a lot of new things today~

SHU: You’re right. It seems like my dream of eating a meat bun is about to come true, too.

EICHI: And here I thought that I had an idea what you all like but—A meat bun, huh?

EICHI: That was an unexpected blind spot…!

ISSEI: (chuckles) I’m glad you liked it.

ICHIRU: Hey! What’re you guys doing?

ISSEI: Oh, Ichiru’s calling for us. Let’s go to him.

EICHI: Yep~

(Eichi and Issei go run to Ichiru)

ICHIRU: Ah…! I can’t hold all three of these! Eichi, pass!

EICHI: (flustered) W-w-wait…!

ISSEI: Alright, I’ll hold the two ice creams.

  SHU: (to himself) I’m sure that anything will taste delicious as long as I’m eating with all of you.

[08:37]

  ICHIRU: (sighs) I’m so full~

EICHI: …! You finished them all already?!

ICHIRU: That much is no biggie~!

EICHI: Maybe it really is youth…

ICHIRU: Oh? (with a teasing tone) You’re finally admitting it?

EICHI: …! This is…. kinda frustrating…!

ISSEI: It’s your turn next, Shu~

SHU: Then… How about this?

(Shu puts a card down)

ISSEI: Then… I’ll go with this.

SHU: I see.

ICHIRU: Who’s um… winning right now?

SHU: It’s Issei.

ISSEI: I lost a while ago so I’m gonna win this time~

EICHI: They’re both strong so really, it’s a very tough battle.

SHU: I agree. Issei’s pretty strong, huh.

ICHIRU: I knew it~                              

EICHI: So Issei’s good at playing cards, huh?

ISSEI: Am I? I do like it though.

ICHIRU: By the way, the worst kind of card game to play with Issei is Concentration! (1)

ICHIRU: He remembers where all the cards are after seeing them only once so you can never win!

EICHI: Ahhh…! Issei’s memorization skills are amazing after all!

ISSEI: But, Ichiru has really great luck. Once he’s on a roll, he can get matches even if he doesn’t memorize them so it’s hard to win against him.

ICHIRU: Mine is really just luck though~

SHU: That means, if you two are paired, you’d definitely be invincible.

EICHI: That composure of yours is really something, too, Shu.

EICHI: By the way, my strong point is playing tactics when it comes to a one-on-one game~

ICHIRU: Oh, so you’re the type who can make the opponent draw the queen card in a game of Old Maid, huh?

EICHI: Exactly, that’s how it is.

ICHIRU: That’s so like you! You seem like the type who’ll smile when someone gets the old maid.

EICHI: Eh?! Is that the impression I give off?

ISSEI: (chuckles) Should we play with all four of us after we’re done with this?

SHU: Issei, wait. The match is just beginning. I won’t lose that easily, you know?

ICHIRU: Eh~? Can you turn it to your favour in this case?

EICHI: Shu, show me your cards for a bit~

EICHI: Ah… Hm… This really makes you conflicted, huh?

SHU: Yeah. I’m deciding whether I want to throw this one down of if I want to put the other one down.

EICHI: Uh… This one—Ah, no… Maybe this one…? Ah, I guess we can just leave this one to luck, huh?

SHU: Right? By the way, my winning chances are low if it’s left to chance.

SHU: I’m a lot worse with luck.

EICHI: U-uh… Even if you tell me that, I—

ICHIRU: (chuckles) Doing things like this sometimes is fun, huh~?

ALL: (laughs)

[11:13]

  ICHIRU: Alright, then… This one! (Ichiru puts a card down)

EICHI: AH!! So you’ll really go for that, huh? Um… If I put this down… no, that won’t be good… what about this one…?

EICHI: Ah, this is no good…! It’s my loss no matter what happens…!

ICHIRU: It’s not over, you know? Don’t give up halfway.

EICHI: I mean, this is basically impossible, you know?

ICHIRU: Don’t care, just throw whatever down. You might win!

EICHI: Then… here… (Eichi puts a card down)

ICHIRU: (laughs) It’s my win!

EICHI: See?! I told you so!

ISSEI: Um… That gives Ichiru one point. I have three and Shu also has three.

EICHI: You guys are just too good!

ICHIRU: Your face gives it away so much~

EICHI: Alright, one more! Ah—But it looks like we’re getting closer to Tokyo.

ICHIRU: Eh? Already?

EICHI: We’ll be there a bit after we get past the highway. Maybe we should start packing our things up.

ISSEI: I wanted to play just a bit longer though…

EICHI: It was fun, huh? Let’s all do it again next time.

ISSEI: Okay. Then, I’ll put the cards away.

(Issei starts putting the cards away)

ICHIRU: I’m kinda feeling hungry~

EICHI: Eh…?! Again?

ISSEI: Playing cards was fun, huh? Don’t you think so, Shu?

ISSEI: Shu?

SHU: Hm? Ah…

ISSEI: Were you sleeping by any chance?

SHU: I just dozed off for a bit. I’m fine now. What’s wrong?

ISSEI: We’re almost to Tokyo.

SHU: I see. Time flew by so fast, huh?

ISSEI: It did. Time really does fly so fast when we’re having fun.

SHU: You’re right. But, there’s still a next time.

SHU: The same goes for us playing cards again, going to the service area again, and even having another live.

ISSEI: (smiles) If there’s a next time then, that doesn’t make me so sad.

SHU: Yeah, it’s something to look forward to.

ISSEI: (chuckles) Shu~ You’re getting too excited.

SHU: (chuckles) I’m just impatient.

ISSEI: (smiles) Oh right, you said so before.

[13:33]

  (they all walk back in the dorm)

  EICHI: We’re home.

(Eichi puts the bags down)

EICHI: It’s really reassuring coming back to the dorms, huh?

EICHI: Today—Ah, no. Thank you very much for your hard work at the live and rehearsals these past two days.

SHU: Yeah, great work.

ISSEI: To you, too.

ICHIRU: (stretches) Now that we’re home, I feel like I’m getting tired.

SHU: We all did our best and it turned into a good live. I want you to rest easy tomorrow.

ISSEI: Do you have work tomorrow, Shu?

SHU: Yeah, but it’s not particularly early so there’s no need to worry.

EICHI: I’m gonna go make some tea right now. Would you guys like some?

ICHIRU: I do!

ISSEI: I want some, too.

SHU: Me, too. But, I think I’ll go take a light shower first.

EICHI: Okay~ Then, I’ll go get them ready.

ISSEI: Eichi, do you want me to help?

EICHI: It’s okay, I’ll do it. Issei, go on and sit down.

  ICHIRU: Hey, Issei. Do you think the live’s reports are already up on the net?

ISSEI: Ah, they might be. Let’s look.

(Eichi quietly brings the tea over)

EICHI: Sorry for the wait~ Ah—

SHU: Eichi, sorry for letting you do—

EICHI: Shh…

SHU: Hm?

EICHI: (whispering) Look.

(Issei and Ichiru quietly breathing in their sleep)

SHU: (smiles) They must have felt at ease after coming back to the dorms.

EICHI: (chuckles) It’s like they ran out of batteries.

EICHI: Ah but, what should we do? Maybe letting them rest on the bed is better…

SHU: They’re sleeping so soundly. I’d feel bad if we woke them up.

EICHI: Ah, I know! Then, maybe I should lay a futon out and sleep here, too~

SHU: If you’re going to do that then, let me join in, too.

EICHI: Eh? But you have work tomorrow, right? Will that be okay for you?

EICHI: Maybe the bed would be—

SHU: Don’t leave me out, please.

EICHI: Ah, no, no. That’s not what I was—

ICHIRU: (sleep-talking) ‘Scuse me… One hotdog and melon bread, please…

ISSEI: (sleep-talking) Ichiru…

EICHI: (lets out a strained breath) I thought we woke them up…

EICHI: (whispering) Okay. Then, I’ll go quietly bring some futon here.

(Eichi slowly walks away)

 SHU: (to himself) Things I only saw in my imagination are all becoming true every day, huh.

SHU: Thank you, really. Good night.

  ==END==

Translator’s Notes:

(1) I uh... Don’t really know if I should consider this a translator’s note because it’s mostly just me not knowing anything about a card game. I didn’t know what the game “Shinkei-suijaku” would be called in other countries (not just in general) because this is legit the first time I’ve actually heard of it orz 

It’s basically a card game where you place cards face down on a table and you try to make pairs match. I just went with “Concentration” because I think that is the most common translation for it. It’s also called “Pairs” or “Match Up” or other stuff but “Concentration” was apparently more popular???

※ Please don’t re-post the English translations without permission.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying me a ko-fi here to support my work if you want. (o^▽^o)Thank you!!

[rongchang]

5 Fun Classroom Studying Activities For Participating English Language Learners

Then, remove both the vocabulary phrases themselves or the context clues round them. Students take turns filling in the words or the context clue words that reveal their definitions. Make bingo sheets with a 4-by-4 grid and add phrases to every sq.. Hand out unique sheets and have students mark the proper word when known as. Picture Bingo, Synonym Bingo, and Antonym Bingo are a couple of variations of this recreation. Create two teams and have a person from the first group come as a lot as the blackboard/whiteboard.

Requiring English language learners to talk in entrance of sophistication could also be counter-productive and cause great anxiousness. Encourage them to precise themselves, but don’t force them onto the stage prematurely. Graphic Organizers – Graphic organizers are a method of introducing and assessing ideas in a fashion that encourages significant learning.

For college students who wish to improve their speaking, top-of-the-line methods is by recording yourself. You would possibly feel a little uncomfortable, however I know college students who've done this every day and really seen improvement. Word wall – Post new vocabulary terms on the wall in an organized, grouped manner. For instance, you might want to publish new biology terms in columns based on the extent of group (cell, tissue, organ, and so on.). Pictorial guide – Provide a visible reference to glassware and different supplies used in experiments and activities.

Students may ask each other yes/no questions—they might not ask immediately if what’s on the piece of paper is true about them or not. FluentU takes real-world videos—like music movies, film trailers, news and galvanizing talks—and turns them into customized best english language courses. While most pair work should finish with a gaggle discussion or particular person evaluation, the aim of the pair work is misplaced should you aren’t listening and gently correcting.

Use the step-frame, slow motion, and replay options to focus student consideration on key ideas. Consider apps that college students can download onto private devices. BrainPop ELL has English-learning classes by stage, plus regular lessons by subject obtainable in Spanish. Students at a young age want to start experiencing retelling tales.

They can only use verbal clues they usually can’t say the reply. The first staff to guess accurately earns a degree, and the groups rotate who’s sitting within the chairs. The first group to attain a sure number of points wins the sport. A quieter variation is to have one team guess as many solutions in a single minute, then let the other group have a flip.

Each video is accompanied by a lesson that includes comprehension questions to verify for understanding as nicely as open-ended questions and links to discover extra in regards to the topic. Most of the videos are fairly short, so you probably can easily watch it twice should you want, and you'll usually find the transcript as properly. Identify such phrases and ask your college students to notify you whenever they recognize a model new term that's pronounced or written similarly of their first language. This helps build your knowledge of cognates so you'll have the ability to assist future learners master science vocabulary. Closed Captioning – Most science videos are equipped with closed captioning. Turn on the closed captioning so college students can see what narrators and actors are saying.

Review safety symbols and publish them within the room and within the lab handout. Outlines – Provide students with a duplicate of your lecture/discussion outline. This will assist ELL college students know where you're, and where you're going with your lesson. Manual video management – Science movies often introduce a variety of new terms and ideas, most of which even native audio system by no means bear in mind. Use the bookmark and video clip options to return to precise sequences for evaluation.

[generousobservationbeard]

The 5 Most Noteworthy Business Lending Spaces In Gurgaon

Delhi, known for its age old style of business with Connaught Place being the crowning jewel of the city has since emerging time, shrunk in versatility and importance as Gurgaon began developing at an alarming degree of swiftness. Skyscrapers now swarm the region the same way bollocks and farmlands once formed an integral part in the identity of Gurgaon. Today, with the advent of the Delhi Metro, no distance is too far and Gurgaon has transformed itself into a leading business hub across the nation. Home to majority of the multinational and international corporations, this region is chiefly responsible for the inflow of investment and a fast-moving business environment.

It is no rocket-science thus, that an area catering to such a multitude of business activity, must also be equipped to intake and provide the services required for successful functioning of the region. Moreover, the mix of corporate culture and entertainment spots allows Gurgaon to be an ideal location to host business meetings of all kinds and statures with Conference venue.

An area offering services and spaces to all kind of locale, filtering out the best of the best is always a challenge. Many come close, but when selecting spaces for your business meetings, only the ones best in the business hold significant importance. The term ‘you get what you pay for’ should be applicable here and yet, there do exist some cost-effective solutions that uphold their claim to premium quality.

Let’s take a further look to see which such spaces you can employ to make a statement at your next business meeting.

The Oberoi

Talking of the best, nothing comes close to this magnificent award winning plush property. Located in Gurgaon just 15 minutes aware from the International and domestic effort, this hotel flaunts stunning views and an immaculate ambience.

Commonly used by business travellers who can find much utility in their on-site business centre and conference room to arrange formal meetings, The Oberoi also has facilities in place to host large events with two ball rooms, incorporating close to 650 guests. Their eloquent dining spaces and best in house chefs make for an appealing attraction of this hotel as well.

The WestIn Gurgaon

This hotel is what you can call an ultimate experience of absolute comfort and contemporary design. Offering easy access to nearby locations and the Indira Gandhi International airport, The Westin offers some splendid professional facilities such as well-appointed meeting spaces and business centers outfitted with the latest technology. The six onsite dining venues cater to every palate and they offer complete staffing of their business centers to ensure maximum productivity of their guests.

Hyatt Regency

Hyatt Regency is the largest 5 star convention property situation in Gurgaon. The property is easily accessible from the Gurgaon City Centre and Indira Gandhi International Airport. To cater to your business needs, they provide 3 different meeting rooms and you can avail them as per your accommodation needs. They can accommodate over 3000 attendees and is thus an extremely wellsuited option for those who want to host large conventions.

The Leela Ambience

One of the most vibrant 5 star hotels in Gurugram, The Leela Ambience is in close proximity to the airport and replete with business amenities such as fully equipped conference rooms and meeting halls. A perfect attraction for your next business conclave or conference, this property offers banquet venues ranging 27000 sq. ft. and inclusive of a Board Room Lounge. They also offer a wide array of dining options and business offers complete with two way airport transfers.

Taj City Centre

Located just 30 km from the national capital and 19 km from the airport, this strikingly contemporary hotel flaunts an urbane aesthetic with state-of-the art boardrooms, and varied accommodations based on the size of gathering and occasions. Starting from their ‘Glasshouse’ hall for intimate conferences to their ‘Victory I’ pillar less hall, fit with LED screens and availability of multi-lingual staff, it is no wonder that the Taj is without doubt, at the pinnacle when it comes to the hospitality business. Gurgaon is India’s national capital and one of the top five most populous cities in the world housing over 250 Fortune 500 companies. It has recently become a breeding ground to startups and of course, multinational corporations. Finding an ideal business space that fits your needs is all that matters and with this information available, you can now make the best business decisions that are tailor made as well as profitable to you!

[markdecastroweb]

Read these 7 easily-forgotten playing tips before you buy your next lottery ticket

If you want to be a successful winner like Powerball winner Neal Wanless, follow these make-or-break tips.

Here are 7 essential tips you should be thinking about - both before and after you play your lottery game:

BEFORE PLAYING

1 - Keep your tickets in a pouch or folder. I was standing behind a lady this morning who pulled out a very crumpled lottery ticket. It had to be put through the machine twice because it couldn't be read properly. Your tickets have to last a while, so make sure they are protected. I use a custom cover provided from the lottery store.

2 - Double check to see that you have entered all the numbers correctly and that you have the right number of tickets. One player forgot to tear up his test ticket and paid for two sets of numbers - a waste of play money.

3 - Make sure you have left enough time to play before the game's deadline. This post is an excellent example of how one player lost $27 million by not meeting the deadline. Yes, $27 million!

4 - Member of a private syndicate? Ensure you have rules of play and ownership clearly agreed before you buy the tickets. Here's a sample lotto syndicate agreement you can use.

AFTER PLAYING

5 - Get your tickets checked by the retailer, even if you only have a few. The risk of getting the numbers wrong and missing out on a prize is too great. 

6 - Get the tickets back from the retailer, particularly if they are winning tickets. This will help you if any confusion over the ticket numbers arises. 

7 - If you have winning tickets of any value, keep them in a safe place. The best place is in a bank safe, but sometimes that's not always possible - if you win in the weekend for example. Here are 21 places that ticket burglars are unlikely to search in your home:

Inside toys in your children's bedroom.

Inside a book. Remember the page number!

In the back of a framed picture, between the picture and the backing board.

Rolled up inside a coffee cup, on a top shelf.

Under a home entertainment center. Use a shifting trolley to lift it.

Inside fake electrical outlets.

In a CD/DVD case.

Taped to your chest.

In heating and AC ducts.

In a hollowed out space in furniture.

Behind baseboards.

Under floorboards.

Inside the top of a hollowed-out door.

Buried in house plant soil in a plastic bag.

In the pocket of a coat hanging in your wardrobe.

Buried in the garden.

Inside a false pipe in the basement.

Inside the service panel of your washing machine or dryer.

Taped under low fixtures, shelves etc.

In waterproof containers in the toilet water tank or dehumidifier.

In a plastic bag inside coffee, flour, rice tins.

Hi Ken;

I followed your advice... I WON $100,000.00!!!!!! on my second try. Your system works and your tips are very important to follow. I'm continuing to play and expect to win again. I'll write again when I do. Thanks for a system that works.

Regards, Ron

Read these 7 easily-forgotten playing tips before you buy your next lottery ticket published first on https://188lotosite.tumblr.com/

[oliverphisher]

Royce Kurmelovs

Royce Kurmelovs is an award winning Australian journalist and author whose work has been published online and in print by Al Jazeera English, The BBC, CNN, The Guardian, VICE, The Saturday Paper, The ABC and others. He is the author of three books, with his fourth on the high level of Australian indebtedness due to be published by UQP in August 2020.

The Death of Holden: The bestselling account of the decline of Australian manufacturing By Royce Kurmelovs Buy on Amazon

Royce Kurmelovs is an author of The Death of Holden (2016), Rogue Nation (2017) and Boom and Bust (2018). He lives in Adelaide, South Australia.

What are one to three books that have greatly influenced your life? 

Catch-22 Starring Alan Arkin, Art Garfunkel, Bob Newhart, Anthony Perkins, Martin Sheen

It depends on what period of my life you are talking about. When I was younger, the book that had the biggest impact on me was Catch 22. People might rave about dystopian novels like 1984, but Catch 22 offers something deeper: you get a critiques of capitalism, authoritarianism, masculinity and bureaucracy in one beautiful, absurd package told with a striking sense of humour. It also helps make sense of the world we currently live in.

The Bus Driver Who Wanted To Be God & Other Stories By Etgar Keret

When I grew older, Etgar Keret's The Bus Driver Who Wanted To Be God had a profound influence for the way he told simple stories, always with a twist, in a conversational way.

Work and Other Sins: Life in New York City and Thereabouts By Charlie LeDuff

The last has been Charlie LeDuff's Work and Other Sins which is a collection of profiles and other journalistic works from his time at The New York Times. He showed me how to be a reporter.

What purchase of $100 or less has most positively impacted your life in the last six months (or in recent memory)?      

As a working freelancer, life can be pretty risky, but a month or two back I upped my membership with the Australia journalists union, The Media and Entertainment Arts Alliances which gave me insurance coverage I haven't had before. Having that sort of protection has been professionally life-changing. You don't realise how exposed you are when you're out here doing it on your own.

How has a failure, or apparent failure, set you up for later success? 

Truth be told, I am expert in the art of screwing up, so there are really too many moments to tell. One of my favourite professional screw ups, early on, was applying for a job in a magazine and turning up in the wrong outfit, saying the wrong things, and not getting the job. The person who did the interview explained, with great seriousness, how an established local reporter was working with them. Needless to say I didn't get the job, but a year later I had published my first book that went on to be a best seller. That inability to catch a break early on made me more determined. Screwing up, after all, is how we learn stuff. The only real failure is the failure to learn from our mistakes.

Are there any quotes you think of often or live your life by?

I try not to, to be honest. The circumstances that define one life do not so easily apply to -- and often do not exist for -- another. Each of us has to find out own way in the face of great uncertainty. Our course is shaped by the institutions we interact with, but the trajectories can change. The insights of others can sometimes help in this, but ultimately navigating it is less a matter of skill or ability, than the interaction of trial, error, capacity and resilience. The acting of choosing in the face of this inherent uncertainty is profound, so long as we acknowledge that sometimes those choices are often arbitrary.

What is one of the best investment in a writing resource you’ve ever made? 

A second monitor. I work off a laptop so the ability to throw documents up on a second screen while I work has done amazing things for both my posture and my productivity.

What is an unusual habit or an absurd thing that you love? 

Dungeons and Dragons.

In the last five years, what new belief, behaviour, or habit has most improved your life? 

The understanding that, despite popular wisdom, to "live without regret" is stupid as the reverse is true. I was talking to someone about this the other day, and the shared conclusion was that if the act of choosing is significant, living well generates regrets. It scares me, to be honest, when I think about my own life and plot out just how different things might have been but for one or two choices. I can't speak for other people, but I always wonder about what would have happened if I had made different choices. You can invent whole other narratives this way. Perhaps, if I had decided one or two things differently, someone might not have gotten hurt. Or maybe I'd have different friends. Or lovers. Or my personal circumstances might be better -- or worse. Whatever the case, I'd be a wholly different person and I don't think we'd be having this conversation right now. The point, I think, is that anyone who goes through life without regrets is not really taking the business of living very seriously. Either the choices they are making don't matter, or they have no grasp of the significance of their decisions on the people around them.

What advice would you give to a smart, driven aspiring author? What advice should they ignore? 

I am really, very reluctant to give advice to anyone. Someone on Twitter once described the business of journalism like running across a series of burning bridges. The same applies to publishing. The specific pathways that were available to me are not going to be available to anyone else. I also write nonfiction, which is very different to those who write fiction or poetry.

What I will say is that writing is work, and the old wisdom of news editors the world over remains true: you're only as good as your last story. You have to get up each and put words on the page. You have to always be trying to tell a better story. Sometimes it's hard, and you'll screw it up, or you'll do the best you can and it still won't go your way. Whatever the case, your job is to get it done, then come back and do it again tomorrow -- hopefully a little better. This is why we write books: to get better at what we do.

What are bad recommendations you hear in your profession often? 

Reporters, like front-line service workers, often see people at their worst and witness heavy things. The idea that you should push through in spite of any psychological harm is bad and the idea that you're somehow weak for reacting to it is deeply problematic. A reporters' job is to bring the story back, and we can't do that if we're dead or broken by what we've seen.

In the last five years, what have you become better at saying no to (distractions, invitations, etc.)? 

Not much,. I say yes to most things, for better for worse -- and let me tell you it's been a hell of a ride.

What marketing tactics should authors avoid?

I'm not a marketing guy, so I can't really say. There are people who are paid big bucks to know this stuff. Mostly, I try to write the best book that I can and bring it to the public.

What new realizations and/or approaches have helped you achieve your goals? 

Context is everything, but once you have an eye for it, you'll become no fun at parties.

When you feel overwhelmed or have lost your focus temporarily, what do you do? 

Mostly, I try to leave, or go somewhere else. I tend to take walks, but lately I've started running which, has been really good forcing a reset. 

Any other tips?

A couple of other things:

1. Good writing is draws on lived experience, so have adventures.

2. It's okay not to know stuff and anyone who makes you feel bad for asking a question is a jerk.

3. You can't help but emulate your heroes sometimes, but then the world already has one of them. You're someone new, so what are you bringing to the table? What makes you unique?

4. Be warned, what you write about and how you write it often reveals more about yourself than you realise.

________

Enjoyed this Q&A? Want to discuss in more depth? Join Community Writers. You'll get access to 100+ exclusive writing tips. Q&As with successful authors, an exclusive ebook on building an audience and much more. Sign-up for free as a community writer here

source https://www.thecommunitywriter.com/blog/royce-kurmelovs

[augustisab-blog]

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[lifeboatadvertisingllc]

How To Build A Brand From The Bottom Up

Building a brand can be a long and tedious process, like Lifeboat (rebranded after ten years!) – here's how to do it right.

Right now, I want you to think of the most famous companies that come to mind. Chances are, there's at least one on the following:

Nike

Microsoft

Apple

Coca Cola

Pepsi

McDonald's

All of these companies have very successful branding campaigns; they know their target market, how to interact with this audience, but most importantly, are consistent with their branding. If the Nike tick suddenly changed, we too wouldn't know who Nike is.

Think of branding as a way of identifying a business or individual, what is the businesses name, logo, slogan, color theme, and style? Branding should be as unique as possible, you want someone to see your logo or hear your name and instantly know what it is, what you provide, and how they can get their hands on your product or service.

This article will discuss how to build a brand from the bottom up, from researching your target audience to being consistent with your branding, here is what you need to know.

Research your target audience 

Before setting up any business, website, or even a personal brand, it's essential to research your target audience. This lets you first see if there's a demand for the service you're providing, and second, it will enable you to see what your audience likes and dislikes, understanding what content and/or product works best to resonate with them.

Likewise, carrying out basic research is essential for setting your brand theme. Perhaps if your audience is generally younger, you may wish to go with a modern and interactive look/design, but if your audience is a little broader or older, then going for a more inclusive and traditional feel is likely better.

There are many ways to carry out this research; however, we recommend the following as a basic starting point:

Researching your competitors 

Use a keyword tool to analyze the potential audience size 

Post/view forums to interact directly with your target audience – ask their opinion, what they want, and what they think is missing from their niche 

Out of these points, one of the most important is most certainly researching your competitors. You want to look for the already existing big brands, the Nike's and McDonald's of your niche or industry.

Conducting this research will allow you a feel of how big a market you can tap into, although some markets may look both fierce and competitive, often there are small gaps which can be filled – this is where you are likely to fit in.

A great way to find these gaps is to use a keyword tool such as Ahrefs. While this is more useful for finding keywords to target in blogs, it will also allow you to see what your target market is searching for, what they are in need of, and how many people are searching for this.

Finally, posting in forums/viewing other posts is a great way to find our directly what those in your target market are missing from their niche. This allows you to plug the gaps, solving real-world problems, providing knowledge, or creating a product to satisfy customers already in-need.

Choosing a business/website name 

Choosing a business/website name is difficult, but often many people overthink this. You want your name to preferably be short, sweet, and simple. This allows customers to easily remember this, returning to your business/product when they next need it.

For some, choosing their name is as simple as their real name, whereas, for others, it makes more sense to develop an entirely new name and concept e.g., Nike.

Whatever you choose to go with, it needs to be brandable, allowing customers to identify your business while providing scaling options in the future.

Did you know: the company Nike used to be called Blue Ribbon Sports?

Acquiring a logo

Once you've chosen your business name, it's now time to acquire a logo. While you may be tempted to make this yourself or hire someone to do it for as little as $5, remember this is the face of your business – often the first thing a new customer will see.

Therefore, we highly encourage you to fork out a little, investing in mid-top rated designer to do an excellent job of it – allowing it to stand the test of time.

Be consistent with your branding  

No matter how good your business or brand, if you're not consistent with your branding, your customer will often end up confused, wondering if they've landed on the right site, who their most recent email is from, or why they liked a post on Instagram twelve weeks back.

At Lifeboat, we like to say that branding is storytelling. The more we allow the customer to buy into the story, the more likely they are to make a purchase or to follow-up with you or your business.

Allowing more customers to buy into your story inevitably leads to more sales and conversions, landing new clients, and producing more revenue.

What's not to love?

A great first step to immersing each customer into your story is through consistent branding. Whether you're sending an email, posting a parcel, sending a tweet, or running a competition to win an Audi RS6, you must put the brand in front of the customer at all times.

Take care of the brand, and your brand will take care of you.

To conclude 

Building a brand is like writing a story, you want your target audience to buy into this story to continue coming back to your business and/or service.

When it comes to building a brand from scratch, we recommend researching your target audience, choosing a short, sweet, and simple name, acquiring a high-quality logo, and, most importantly to remain consistent with your branding.

If all this sounds a little too difficult, we here at Lifeboat Advertising can help you out. Having worked with a variety of popular clients, including Melanie Meriney, Boston Motor Coach, Studio Five Fitness, rest assured you're in good hands.

To get in touch or to receive a free no-obligation quote, please click here.

Source/Repost=> https://lifeboat.dev/blog/how-to-build-a-brand-from-the-bottom-up ** Lifeboat | Advertising Agency ** https://www.lifeboat.dev

[wildlyhardphilosopher-blog]

pitbull puppy training | house train dog

New Post has been published on https://dogtraining.dknol.com/english/pitbull-puppy-training-house-train-dog/?utm_source=Tumblr&utm_medium=Tumblr+%230+Freda+K+Pless&utm_campaign=SNAP%2Bfrom%2BBest+Dog+Training

pitbull puppy training | house train dog

Give your dog positive reinforcement for good behavior when he goes where he is supposed to, and be as over-the-top as you can in your praise. Clap, cheer, give him treats, and let him know how happy you are that he went potty in the place you have taught him. Pups love praise and attention, so doing this helps in understanding that going where he is supposed to go results in a happy human. Ad Content For Delegates Herm Sprenger (2) Choosing a compatible breed/dog Pet Rats info@sfpuppyprep.com TRAINING APPLICATION Español: educar a un cachorro para que no muerda, Deutsch: Einem jungen Hund das Beissen abgewöhnen, Português: Treinar um Filhote Para Não Morder, Italiano: Insegnare a un Cucciolo a Non Mordere, Русский: обучить щенка не кусаться, Français: apprendre à un chiot à ne pas mordre, Bahasa Indonesia: Melatih Anak Anjing Agar Tidak Mengigit, Nederlands: Een puppy afleren te bijten, 中文: 训练狗狗不乱咬, ไทย: ฝึกลูกหมาไม่ให้กัด, 日本語: 子犬の噛み癖を防ぐ, 한국어: 강아지가 물지 않게 훈련시키는 방법, Tiếng Việt: Dạy chó con ngừng cắn, العربية: تدريب الجِراء على عدم العض Free Mobile App February 27, 2018 at 6:21 pm For more information, please contact our staff at 941.729.5665. Having a pet as part of your family has many well-documented health benefits. Submissive Urination: Why your dog does it and how to help them stop Complete Features July 2018 Issue General: Can you leave your 11 week old puppy out on the garden? It’s not something I would do, but you could potentially and I wouldn’t say you were wrong to do so. After all, wild dogs will spend almost all their time outside (some time in a den of course) so it’s not an unnatural thing. But this would be supervised time, under the watchful and protecting eye of their mother, not alone. So there are differences. Water Conditioners You don’t need to sign up for an obedience class to get help training your puppy. I’ve taught hundreds of those classes and they can be overwhelming for a puppy. Timid puppies can get overrun by bullies, and excitable puppies just get more excitable. November 20, 2017 Why You Shouldn’t Allow Your Puppy Full Run Of The House Prime Time for Housetraining Puppies If you use a spray bottle, your puppy may become frightened of any squirting sounds and/or water. y Guest Commentary: Save Red Rocks from the plague of development Suellyn V | Mason, Michigan Modern History – World Animal Hoarding Good luck with potty training your puppy and do let us know how you get on! Alimentos de consumo humano recomendados para perros Don’t try to punish your dog for accidents. Yelling, hitting, or rubbing your dog’s nose in the mess won’t teach the dog anything useful. If you haven’t caught your dog in the act, he won’t have any idea what you’re so upset about. Hurting your dog in any way is animal abuse. © Copyright 2017 – Red Cat Media Ltd Essential Tools for Housetraining Feeding an unsuitable diet or giving a variety of foods. Cleaning & Odor Control Our Service Commitment Your Cart Rat advice Most puppies love treats, but don’t RELY on them to teach good behavior. Accessories Why Does My Dog Put His Paw On Me “Correction should never frighten the dog,” said Heather Rush with Flying Ace Puppy School. “They should never hurt the dog, they should never put a dog in a situation where they can’t win or they’re cowering away from you and they don’t know how to get back to the right answer.” You dismissed this ad. First of all, if like me you use a crate, you simply cannot leave your puppy in the crate for many hours. They’ll be forced to potty in there after a very uncomfortable time trying to hold it for as long as they possibly can. RecPlex VetriScience Mobile Become a Member / Subscribe Go back San Jose West New! My Pets Food Form Helix Fairweather social@canna-pet.com Contact Privacy Cookie Policy Terms of Use When returning home to a crated dog, keep it low key. Don’t encourage their excitement by responding to them in the same way. Come in quietly, don’t go immediately to your dog’s crate, and when you do a few minutes later, do so casually and calmly. How To Stop A Puppy From Peeing And Pooping In The House Fitness & Exercise Your Training Path About Our Products Ornaments Dandie Dinmont Terrier Enzymatic cleaner A puppy wearing a belly band. Crating and tethering are the two most frequently used management options when it comes to potty training. For most families, the use of one or both of these management tools can greatly expedite the house training process. Many times, I recommend a combination of the two techniques. Renew If he’s about to jump up to join you, tug sideways and ignore him until he sits quietly on the floor. © VetBabble – Pet Info from Pet Experts Sign up to Receive our Free Dog Guide E-Book and Monthly Newsletter! July 31, 2017 Crafts & Woodworking Share Your Testimonial In other languages Glossary terms will be automatically marked with links to their descriptions. If there are certain phrases or sections of text that should be excluded from glossary marking and linking, use the special markup, [no-glossary] … [/no-glossary]. Additionally, these HTML elements will not be scanned: a, abbr, acronym, code, pre. The key to making the crate the dog’s favorite retreat and sleeping area is to associate the crate with as many positive and relaxing experiences and stimuli as possible (treats, chew toys, bedding) and to place the dog in their cage when playing with new toys during scheduled rest and sleep periods or even as a feeding area. If you live in a condo or apartment without easy access to the outdoors, indoor housetraining may be your best option. Training your puppy to use pee pads can make life easier for both of you and help to keep the mess contained. This training method is not perfect, but it works well for many dog owners. If you’d like to give it a try, we recommend Four Paws Wee-Wee Pads . text Food As temperatures rise, follow our guide to keeping your dog safe and having fun in the summer sun… Heatstroke in… Clear and concise rules for training your puppy to pee and poop in only designated areas. The book is easily read in one sitting and should be read as soon as possible aftet…Read more

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fbq('track', 'ViewContent', content_ids: 'dogtraining.dknol', ); Not only can crate training help potty train your dog, but it is important for your dog to be accustomed to a crate for travel purposes. Should your dog need to go to the vet, travel, or need to be confined for any other reason, your dog will be comfortable with the crate and remain happy. Canaan Dog If you’ve followed the guide so far, you’ve now gathered all the information you need to design your puppy’s house training schedule. Memorabilia & Gifts Film Festivals How Do Dogs Choose Their Favorite Person? Hill’s® Science Diet® Adult 7+ Savory Stew with Beef & Vegetables Nature has arranged it such that a small, enclosed area will help your puppy learn conscious control of his urge to eliminate. In the wild, mother wolves teach their litters to potty outside the den. If you provide your puppy with his own den, you’re working in harmony with his natural desire not to soil it. You then slowly move the paper toward the outside where another set is placed and you begin to encourage your puppy to go outside only, before completely removing the papers inside. At this point they will have made the transition. Bring your puppy or dog to the Wisconsin Humane Society for our fun and engaging training classes! More Contact Options Our professional training facility is 7,000 sq feet of indoor, air-conditioned, matted classroom. You and your dog will learn quickly in this clean friendly environment. How to Potty Train Your Dog This will help your puppy’s mind and body to slip into a routine that will help you both with the house training process. Soar Where his bed is. What if your dog could run freely in your yard without leaving? If you could trust him on or off leash, anywhere you go. Save up to $190.00 Starting at $59.95 $79.95 $59.95–$79.95 For any of these techniques, consistency of the owner’s training/behavior and level of engagement can influence the effectiveness of any technique applied.[78] Sweet Potato (1) Religion Tip #1: Train Yourself First Digestive / Weight / Glucose Management PUPPY START RIGHT FOR INSTRUCTORS Apple Ahimsa Dog Training (DoggieZen.com) was founded in 2003 to offer positive puppy and dog training in Seattle. We believe in a force-free training for EVERY dog – puppies, adult dogs, competition dogs, shy dogs, fearful dogs, reactive dogs, “problem” dogs, aggressive dogs… We offer a wide variety of dog training classes including puppy socialization, puppy training, basic manners to off-leash advanced manners, agility, therapy dog training, canine good citizenship certification, STAR puppy certification, tricks classes, focus and control classes and more. Ahimsa was voted the #1 dog training school in Western Washington. Ahimsa trainers co-host Kiro’s weekly radio show “Its Raining Cats and Dogs.” We’ve been featured on King 5 TV, in CityDog Magazine, NWsource and CitySearch.com. #1 Best Seller in Dog Training Featured Wet Food Treats Dry Food Catnip & Grass Shop All Tangles & Mats Mats & Crate Covers Growly Dog Agility It is much easier to watch your pup if he is settled down in a single spot. Either you may move the crate so that your puppy is in the same room as you, or you may want to confine your pup to a different room to start preparing him for times when he will be left at home alone. If you do not like the idea of confining your puppy to a dog crate, you may tie the leash to your belt and have the pup settle down at your feet. Or you may fasten the leash to an eye-hook in the baseboard next to your puppy’s bed, basket, or mat. To prevent the chewtoys from rolling out of reach, also tie them to the eye-hook. Pet Naturals of Vermont (4) Consider taking your dog to a puppy kindergarten or puppy socialization class, Nelson says. Classes offer a chance for puppies to meet new dogs and new people — all with the oversight of a trainer. Ware Leash Fax: 262-347-0780 Clicker Training English Foxhound 21 min read Time: 2018-07-27T05:34:27Z Lietuva Puppy pads give your dog the option to relieve himself in an approved spot within the house. Training your dog to use a puppy pad is similar to training him to eliminate outside. If your dog signals that he has to potty or starts to go potty in another area, immediately lead him to the puppy pad. Once he’s successfully used the puppy pad, make sure to reinforce the behavior with praise and/or treats. If your puppy pees or poops on the floor or carpet make sure you clean it up immediately (I’m sure I really didn’t have to say that). However, if your puppy smells the pee or poop on the floor then he will return to this spot to pee again. puppy training | training puppy not to bark puppy training | puppy training | How to Train a Puppy NOT to BITE Legal | Sitemap

[theresawelchy]

Serverless computing: one step forward, two steps back

Serverless computing: one step forward, two steps back Hellerstein et al., CIDR’19

The biennial Conference on Innovative Data Systems Research has come round again. Today’s paper choice is sure to generate some healthy debate, and it’s a good set of questions to spend some time thinking over as we head into 2019: Where do you think serverless is heading? What is it good for today? What’s the end-goal here?

The authors see ‘critical gaps’ in current first-generation serverless offerings from the major cloud vendors (AWS, Azure, GCP). I’m sure some will read the paper as serverless-bashing, but I read into it more of an appeal from the heart to not stop where we are today, but to continue to pursue infrastructure and programming models truly designed for cloud platforms. Platforms that offer ‘unlimited’ data storage, ‘unlimited’ distributed processing power, and the ability to harness these only as needed.

We hope this paper shifts the discussion from ‘What it serverless?’ Or ‘Will serverless win?’ to a rethinking of how we design infrastructure and programming models to spark real innovation in data-rich, cloud-scale systems. We see the future of cloud programming as far, far brighter than the promise of today’s serverless FaaS offerings. Getting to that future requires revisiting the designs and limitations of what is being called ‘serverless computing’ today.

What is serverless and what is it good for today?

Serverless as a term has been broadly co-opted of late (‘the notion is vague enough to allow optimists to project any number of possible broad interpretations on what it might mean’). In this paper, serverless means FaaS (Functions-as-a-Service), in the spirit of the offerings that the major cloud vendors are currently promoting.

Developers can register functions to run in the cloud, and declare when those functions should be triggered

A FaaS infrastructure monitors triggering events, allocates a runtime for the function, executes it, and persists the results

The platform is not simply elastic, in the sense that humans or scripts can add and remove resources as needed, it is autoscaling: the workload automatically drives the allocation and deallocation of resources

The user is only billed for the computing resources used during function invocation

Many people have reported great results from adopting serverless. See for example ‘Serverless computing: economic and architectural impact’ that we looked at previously on The Morning Paper. The authors analysed use cases documented by Amazon and broke them down into three major buckets:

Embarrassingly parallel tasks, often invoked on-demand and intermittently. For example, re-sizing images, performing object recognition, and running integer-programming-based optimisations.

Orchestration functions, used to coordinate calls to proprietary auto-scaling services, where the back-end services themselves do the real heavy lifting.

Applications that compose chains of functions – for example workflows connected via data dependencies. These use cases showed high end-to-end latencies though.

Limitations: putting the ‘less’ in serverless

Moving beyond the use cases outlined above we run into a number of limitations of the current embodiments of serverless:

Functions have limited lifetimes (15 minutes)

Functions are critically reliant on network bandwidth to communicate, but current platforms from AWS, Google, and Azure provide limited bandwidth (an order of magnitude lower than a single modern SSD) that is shared between all functions packed on the same VM.

Since functions are not directly network accessible, they must communicate via an intermediary service – which typically results in writing state out to slow storage and reading it back in again on subsequent calls.

There is no mechanism to access specialized hardware through functions, yet hardware specialisation will only accelerate in the coming years.

One consequence of these limitations is that FaaS is a data-shipping architecture: we move data to the code, not the other way round.

This is a recurring architectural anti-pattern amongst system designers, which database aficionados seem to need to point out each generation. Memory hierarchy realities— across various storage layers and network delays — make this a bad design decision for reasons of latency, bandwidth, and cost.

A second consequence is that the high cost of function interactions ‘stymies basic distributed computing.’

… with all communication transiting through storage, there is no real way for thousands (much less millions) of cores in the cloud to work together efficiently using current FaaS platforms, other than via largely uncoordinated (embarrassing) parallelism.

(Enlarge)

Three small case studies in the paper illustrate the pain of moving outside of the serverless sweetspot:

Training machine learning models. A single Lambda function was able to perform 294 iterations before hitting the time limit, so 31 sequential executions were required to complete training. The total cost was $0.29, and the total training latency was 465 minutes. Using an m4.large instance with 8GB RAM instead, the training process takes around 21 minutes and costs $0.04.

Low-latency prediction serving. The best result using Lambda functions achieved an average latency of 447ms per batch. An alternative using two m5.large instances connected via ZeroMQ showed an average latency of 13ms per batch – 27x faster. For one million messages per second, the Lamdba + SQS solution would costs $1,584 per hour. Using EC2 instances the same throughput costs around $27.84 per hour.

Trying to implement a simple leader election protocol through functions using a blackboard architecture with DynamoDB, each round of leader election took 16.7 seconds. (And using DynamoDB as a communication mechanism in this way would cost $450 per hour to coordinate a cluster of 1000 nodes).

These results fall into the “we tried to fix some screws with a hammer and it didn’t work out too well” bucket. But highlighting where current serverless designs don’t work well can help us think about ways to improve them.

Many of the constraints of current FaaS offerings can also be overcome, we believe, maintaining autoscaling while unlocking the performance potential of data and distributed computing.

Moving forward

A ��truly programmable environment for the cloud’ should have the following characteristics:

Fluid code and data placement: logical separation of code and data with the ability of the infrastructure to physically colocate when it makes sense, including function shipping.

Heterogenous hardware support. “Ideally, application developers could specify applications using high-level DSLs, and the cloud providers would compile those applications to the most cost-effective hardware that meets user specified SLOs“

Long-running, addressable virtual agents: “If the platform pays a cost to create an affinity (e.g. moving data), it should recoup that cost across multiple requests. This motivates the ability for programmers to establish software agents— call them functions, actors, services, etc.— that persist over time in the cloud, with known identities.“

Disorderly programming: “the sequential metaphor of procedural programming will not scale to the cloud. Developers need languages that encourage code that works correctly in small, granular units— of both data and computation— that can be easily moved around across time and space.” For example, Functional Reactive Programming.

A common intermediate representation (IR), that can serve as a compilation target from many languages (because a wide variety of programming languages and DSLs will be explored). Web assembly anyone?

An API for specifying service-level objectives. “Achieving predictable SLOs requires a smooth ‘cost surface’ in optimization— non-linearities are the bane of SLOs. This reinforces our discussion above regarding small granules of code and data with fluid placement and disorderly execution.“

A ‘cloud-programming aware’ security model.

Taken together, these challenges seem both interesting and surmountable… We are optimistic that research can open the cloud’s full potential to programmers. Whether we call the new results ‘serverless computing’ or something else, the future is fluid.

I’m sure you’ve noticed the trend for many things in IT to become finer-grained over time (releases, team structure, service sizes, deployment units, …). I really need to write a longer blog post about this, but my thesis is that in many cases the ideal we’re seeking is a continuous one (e.g., in the case of serverless, continuous and seamless autoscaling of cloud resources and the associated billing). The more fine-grained we make things, the better our approximation to that ideal (it’s calculus all over again. We’re held back from making things finer-grained beyond a certain point by the transaction costs (borrowing from lean) associated with each unit. E.g. “we can’t possible release once a day, it takes us a full week to go through the release process!” Once we find a way to lower the transaction costs, we can improve our approximation and become finer-grained. If you haven’t seen it already for example, check out the work that CloudFlare have been doing with workers: V8 isolates (v low transaction costs), a web assembly runtime (the IR called for above), and JavaScript functions. Skate to where the puck is heading!

[thecreaturecodex]

Puuk

Image © Heather Frazier, accessed at her deviantArt here

[One of many familiar-like monsters in Eastern European lore that steal for their masters. My intent with this one was to make an evil equivalent of the pseudodragon from D&D/PFRPG. I don’t remember why I went with this name instead of the more familiar aitvaras.]

Puuk CR 1 NE Dragon A black-scaled wingless dragon the size of a cat creeps forth, a coin-purse clasped in its nimble talons.

Malicious and greedy, the tiny dragons known as puuks seek comfort and riches at any cost. They are expert shapechangers and use their abilities for both mobility and self-defense. Native to pine forests, many puuk are content to live in caves or tree hollows and prey on travelers as bandits do. Wild puuk are usually solitary, as they are distrustful of others of their own kind.

Other puuk, however, have learned that riches flow more freely in cities and have inveigled their way into urban life. An urban puuk offers its services to a humanoid partner, exchanging wealth stolen from the neighborhood for a warm hearth and plenty of food. A puuk will often watch over a town for months disguised in animal form before choosing a partner, gauging what members of a community are the greediest and most likely to condone their larcenous activities. Puuk have little loyalty to their humanoid accomplices and will gladly betray or attack them if their activities fall under suspicion. A neutral evil spell-caster of at least 5th level with the Improved Familiar feat can take a puuk as a familiar, in which case the nasty little dragon remains faithful to its master.

A puuk grows to about two feet long and weighs 10 pounds in draconic form. When assuming an animal shape, they prefer the forms of cats, cockerels or snakes. Puuks prefer to go about their business unnoticed, and will often flee from battle unless cornered or convinced that they will win. In battle, they generally assume their ember form, which grants them both a powerful burning touch and the ability to escape easily should combat turn against them. Puuks are omnivores and have a special fondness for eggs.  Puuks and pseudodragons hate one another, and will gladly battle each other to the death should their paths cross.

Kaukas Especially old and cunning puuks, known as kaukas, grow in both physical stature and magical prowess. Capable of assuming the form of gnomes, goblins and other small humanoids, kaukas tend towards more ambitious plots than puuks. For example, a kaukas may be found attached to the household of a nobleman disguised as a servant, or may take over a tribe of kobolds or goblins and lead them to pillage and loot. A kaukas is a puuk with the advanced and giant simple templates. In addition, it may assume the form of up to a Medium-sized animal or a Small humanoid when using change shape. A kaukas is CR 3.

Puuk     CR 1 XP 400 NE Tiny dragon (shapechanger) Init +2; Senses darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision, Perception +6, treasure scent Defense AC 15, touch 14, flat-footed 13 (+2 size, +2 Dex, +1 natural) hp 13 (2d12) Fort +3, Ref +5, Will +4 Immune fire, paralysis, sleep effects Offense Speed 20 ft., climb 20 ft., fly 60 ft. (perfect) Melee bite +6 (1d4-1) or touch +6 (1d4 fire plus burn) Space 2 ½ ft.; Reach 0 ft. Special Attacks burn (1d4, DC 10) Statistics Str 8, Dex 14, Con 11, Int 12, Wis 13, Cha 10 Base Attack +2; CMB -1; CMD 11 (15 against trip) Feats Weapon Finesse Skills Appraise +6, Bluff +5, Climb +10, Fly +19, Perception +6, Sense Motive +6, Sleight of Hand +4, Stealth +15; Racial Modifiers uses Dex to modify Climb Languages Common, Draconic SQ change shape (Tiny animal, beast shape II), ember form Ecology Environment cold forests and urban Organization solitary or pair Treasure double standard Special Abilities Ember Form (Su) A puuk can change between its ordinary form and that of a tiny ball of fire as a standard action. In solid form, a puuk cannot fly or use its fiery touch. In ember form, a puuk can fly and use its fiery touch, but cannot use its bite attack or climb speed. This change in form cannot be dispelled. A puuk reverts to its draconic form when slain. Treasure Scent (Su) This ability works as scent, except that the puuk can only use it to determine the presence of and pinpoint an item or collection of items worth 50 gp or more.

[lamiaward]

Soulmate Au

Soulmate Au;

Where Regina is kind of a pharaoh, she kind of doesn’t love and her soul is divided into pieces and one of them belongs to her soulmate, Emma. Except she doesn’t know all that. Also, she might be a vampire.

[this is what you get when I wanted to continue writing for ‘sorry, we have already filled our villain quota’ but also for SQ week and also remember something about the really interesting Egyptian concept of the soul when searching for inspiration for this] I don’t own OUAT or the Egyptian ideas of the soul .

 Regina had never felt love. She had heard the laments,  seen it in weaklings that stared at each other with such tenderness,  had heard the blabbering mortals go on and on about ‘our love will win’. It usually faded away approximately two seconds after she had bitten whatever food she had encountered that day.

Either way, she did not believe in love. It was a result of both her mother’s harsh upbringing and a lifetime of disappointment and pain. At this moment in her life, she honestly counted herself fortunate to not have that weakness living in her blood.

That is likely why she reacted the way she did.

Regina hardly dreamt at all. And when she did, she dreamt of the smoke that came from the villages, the screams of the villagers and the taste of sweetened iron in her mouth. She never dreamt like this. First, there was a lurching. The scenery around her suddenly changed, from the golden walls with their blue edges to the deep red sand of the desert. From the ground to a view from the sky, which made her flail for a moment before she slowly started to descent.

She felt the hot sand beneath her feet. She heard the startled gasp behind her and swirled around, allowing her teeth to lengthen as she grinned to- look upon a lovely creature.

She had hair like the Sun God, the absence of the wigs that were in fashion usually an annoyance to Regina but now she didn’t even mind. Her eyes were lined with the traditional black, her face empty of any toilette apart from that. Anyone else likely would have been intimidated by the dagger she carried, or the broad leather bands that covered part of her torso- suggesting she might be a trained warrior. Regina was drawn to it.

As soon as she took a step forward, the woman changed. Her paler-than-usual skin chalked, after which her neck sprouted feathers and lengthened, her eyes shrunk, a black spot erupted over her nose that immediately turned a soft orange and became a beak. Her body remained unchanged , apart from the paler hue, but her head had changed completely.

Before Regina could let a single sound pass her mouth, she felt the lurching again and she stumbled forward. When her eyes snapped open, the first thing she noted was the cold. She spread her fingers, what in the name of the sacred- but it was still true. She felt the cold. She never did. She slowly pushed herself up, glanced around. It was the same chamber, with the same gold-blue walls and the same sparse furniture and the same-

She thought of the woman. Who – then gasped. Her chest- there was something in her chest. She had felt it, had felt the thud as it nearly crashed into her ribcage. She managed to stand up, hand still pressed to her chest, and narrow her eyes. The woman must have done something to her.

And she was going to suffer for that insult.

Regina was standing in the doorway, her eyes still closed. She could hear the soft wails of several babies, the laughter that followed gossip, the notes of the lyre struggling to reach over all the noise. The wails slowly fade and the laughter turns to excited chatter.

She opens her eyes. The women are scattered around the room, some bend over papyrus, some huddled close together as they speak , some rocking babies in their arms, several teaching the youngest children. She approaches the latter.

They don’t hear her approach of course, but her favourite turns its head and smiles giddily. “ Regina!” he exclaims,  the teacher behind him stiffening with fear like usually. He doesn’t seem to notice, throwing his small arms around her. She pulls him up and in her arms.

“ Hello, Henry” she says kissing him on the cheek.  He giggles. “ Hi, Nbty”.

“ Is it interesting?” she inquires, placing her fingers beneath her chin. He nods enthusiastically , his braid bobbing. “ Very much so. We are learning all about the Gods!”.

She smiles. It is so easy to smile around this child. “ Well, you should not forget to honour them”.

“ Uh-uh”

“ Henry- “ she scolds and he grins a little at her. “ I am, really”

“Good. It is very important to honour them”

He shifts in her arms. “ Do you want to know a secret? “.

She bites down on her smile. “ Yes”.

“ You have to swear you won’t tell” his expression becomes more serious than you would expect from a five-year-old. He narrows his eyes a little, something she suspects he has picked up from her. Or hopes- because it could be one of the other women here, too.

“ I swear- “.

He lowers his face.  “ On your true name”

“ That is a very serious thing”.

“ I know. That’s how I will know’

She waits a moment, then nods. “ Very well. I swear it, on my true name”.

He gives her a solemn nod, then leans in a little. She can hardly hear him when he whispers “ I have a favourite deity”.

“ Henry, you are supposed to- “.

“ It is the protectress” he grins adorably. She should probably a little mad at him and she does scold him, but as soon as she sees his lip start to pout and the enthusiasm in his eyes fade, she salvages the situation by saying “ It is okay if it is just in there- “ she taps his heart. “ But do not forget to honour all of them. Deal?”.

He nods vigorously. “ Deal” he kisses her on the cheek, then starts to wriggle. He tries to jump out of her arms, pushes at them but she keeps him there until she has lowered herself and put him down again. He runs back into the circle of children staring at the teacher. She ignores the teacher, chats with a few children, gives a select few hugs. Some try to hang on to her, but they’re pulled back by the teacher under stammering apologies and a lot of bows.

She gives Henry one last hug , then moves to the two women that she has already spotted lounging in the far right corner. They are pressed close together, talking animatedly and occasionally squeezing each other’s hands or threading gentle fingers through each other’s hair. They pull away when the notice her. She doesn’t miss the regret in their eyes.

She doesn’t talk, just cocks her finger. The brunette on the right stands after a short hesitation, glancing at the woman that is staring after her one last time. She follows Regina obediently, who opens one of the many doors this chamber has.

As soon as the door closes, she moves in. She presses Ruby against the wall, buries a hand in her hair and tugs her head back.  She feels the woman’s rapid pulse as she sucks on the skin. “ Relax” she mutters, but the woman remains slightly tense against her.

She pulls back. “ That was a command”.

“ My apologies” she mutters, though there is that hint of disobedience and fury in her eyes that made Regina choose her in the first place. Ruby is the perfect meal : she enjoys it, but at the same time bristles at being ordered around. She is a free spirit, which Regina can definitely enjoy. It makes this much more thrilling.

She slowly extracts her hand from Ruby’s hair, to place it on her cheek. She keeps it there for several moments, staring into Ruby’s eyes. Most people would only be able to stare into her eyes and deny her anything for two, perhaps three minutes. Ruby easily does it for ten.

She smiles, leans forward again. “ As a reward for your obedience, you are allowed to take the girl”. She might be a little possessive of the few girls she has actually chosen for purposes like this. But she is also not blind and Ruby has been pining after that girl for too long. The only reason she has not acted on those feelings , Regina knows, is the fear that Regina might hurt the girl in a fit of possessiveness.

“ Are you – “

“ Yes “ she hisses. Ruby immediately throws her head back, offering her throat. Regina chuckles, drags it out. Ruby is starting to tense a little again, but it is in anticipation this time. She keeps her lips pressed to warm skin for half a minute, then suddenly strikes like a Cobra. She feels Ruby’s arms on her hips as her knees buckle.

It lasts perhaps ten minutes, before Regina slowly pulls back and licks her lips. She is almost gentle when she leads Ruby to one of the simple stone benches. She allows Regina to pull her down, eyes a little glazed over. She stares at Regina as she snaps her fingers. A servant immediately runs towards her with a goblet, which she offers to Ruby.

“ Thank you “ she says, smile a little too bright for it to be about the goblet she is sipping from.

Regina nods. Ruby throws her a confused looks as she sits down next to her. Regina never sits down. “ I wish you to apprehend someone”.

“ Who?”

Ruby flinches a little at the look in Regina’s eyes.

“ A rodent, nullity” Ruby actually shivers, unpleasant ones unlike the earlier ones.

“Will you grant me this favour? “

They both know what Ruby will answer. What is her duty to answer.

“ I just need some details”

 Annoyingly enough, the next time the Lurch happens, it is far more dangerous.

One moment, she feels the press of her chariot against her legs and hears the soft neighs of her horses , the next she is stumbling forward. When she blinks the black spots from her vision, the woman is there again.

Regina licks her lips at the sight of muscular arms, sweaty bare skin and a furious look. The woman stalks forward, one of her hands on the dagger, and murder in her eyes. Well, maybe not murder but the fervent wish to punch her at the very least.

Regina tilts her head a little, gives the woman her most haughty stare, the one that says ‘you are so far beneath me’. Even if from the inside, she is not that cold at all. No, she feels her cheeks heat a little- what kind of magic – and that same thudding against her ribcage and her mouth is dry even though she has fed perhaps a day ago.

That heat magnifies as the thought of biting this woman crosses her mind.

She is already reaching out when there is a blight of light that has stumble backwards and cover her eyes. What she sees from her eye corners, is best described as the sun on the hottest day. Even glancing at it makes her grit her teeth in order to hide the exclamation of pain that immediately wants to slip through.

She must be insane, for she is reaching for it despite every bit of logic warning against it, and there are sunrays on her hand but it is rather pleasant really not the pain she expect and she is starting to feel soft skin and –

She lurches, stumbles. When she slowly drops her hand and opens her eyes, she is staring straight into the worried eyes of one of her favourite servants, the one that has a way with horses and gentle eyes.

It is the first time she ever snaps at him.

It becomes something off an obsession.

At day, she is still ruling of course but her free time is slowly being swallowed by plans and plots, the meetings with her advisor sometimes interrupted by Ruby running inside and whispering something in her ear and the chariot rides she takes venturing farther and farther away from home.

At night, she finds the woman. She finds her with her hair tangled up and the red desert behind her like flames. She finds her leaning against palm trees, with the half of a coconut in her hand. She finds her in cities, hiding behind a market stall. She finds her and is pulled towards her and lurches.

It makes her furious.

She has lost all control, and all choice. She is furious.

And one of the worst part is, how it slips into everything. She is less sharp during meetings, has to force herself to focus on the children’s words, has to read things several times before she actually registers what the words means. It is embarrassing and frustrating and infuriating.

And she doesn’t understand. She is always one step ahead, knows a little more, is the one to bring people off-balance. But now, there is that thudding against her ribcage and food has suddenly lost what little appeal it had and she glances at the sun that is always there and can only think of her. And her magicians are useless, for they protest meekly they have not found any spells, that it must be something else. So now she has to find new ones, because one was fed to her crocodiles and the other probably ran away.

It makes her all very furious.

Her hands suddenly tremble, no matter how many times she drags a girl towards the room to drink.  Her teeth burn and the thudding against her ribcage increases and everything conspirers against her.  Every bronze thing she sees reminds her of that dagger, every yellow thing of the hair, everything. She has never felt so much like impulsively ripping someone apart like she does now.

But if there is one thing important, it is the illusion that she is always in control so she doesn’t. She smiles tightly and has people trip over themselves in their rush to placate her and talks to foreigners in half-threats. The illusion is feeble, but holds to that day.

The day she has some time to visit the children and possibly spend some time with the new girl ( she hardly ever approaches Ruby for this now, who is very happy with her own girl) when she comes within two inches of killing the teacher. It is only a dozen paling faces that keep her from it.

“ What do you mean, gone “ she growls

The teacher shakes, tries to speak. Regina reluctantly relaxes the grip on her throat for a moment. “ H-he left. I d-don’t- “ .

“ Inept” she spits, before pushing the woman away and ignoring the way she cries out. She stalks towards the door, the guards almost jumping away from her and slams the door closed behind her. Two minutes later, she steering her chariot to where she thinks a young boy might run off to.

She finds him quickly,

But not quite enough.

The snake is nearer than she is , quicker than she will be and she is already thinking of ways to punish that teacher for ever endangering him when the snake hisses, once, and yanks left once and then dies. She stares at the dagger that has killed it and sa-

The woman accepts Henry’s hug with an awkward smile that she also turns on Regina. “ Hi “.

“ You were in the proximity of my home all this time? “.

How dare the woman roll her eyes like that.  “I wasn’t , actually. But you see, I was kind of chased so I had to move every day”  she throws a pointed glare Regina’s way.  “That is when I finally came here”.

She looks down at Henry. Regina kneels next to him “ Henry?”.

He finally lets go of the woman’s legs, staring at the ground. She is pretty sure his bottom lip is trembling. She reaches for his chin, gently move his head up. “ Why did you frighten me like this?”

“I wanted to find her. For you”. His voice is very small.

“ That was very peril- dangerous behaviour, Henry”

“M’sorry”

“ You will have to face the consequences of this insubordination’

“ Insu-be what?”

“Insubordination. Disobedience”.

“ M’ real sorry”.

“ I know” she opens her arms, he throws himself in them before she can even finish saying “ Now, give me a-“. She chuckles and lifts him in her arms. He lays his head on her shoulder as she looks at the woman.

“ I suppose I ought to thank you for saving him”.

She shrugs. “ Anyone would have helped”.

“ I am not certain. I did send guards after you”.

“ Yeah, why did you even do that?”.

She stares at the woman “ Because of the-  “ the skin beneath her hand is warm, and soft and there is a lot of muscle. The hand at her hip is strong and sure and still gentle. I never stumble like that. “ Are you okay?  “ the woman whispers.

“ Yes” she suddenly really wants to do something with this woman’s lips. Perhaps bite them? Except you would not get as much blood from them as from a place lower, like – she hears the woman inhale sharply. Then slowly pull away.

She is still not convinced the woman hasn’t cast a spell: the contact breaking actually hurts

But then the woman grimaces and Regina sees little droplets of swear clinging to her brow. Her hands are trembling, like Regina’s have been. She licks her lips nervously, Regina flits her eyes up and down. She takes a step nearer. The woman does, too.

‘ You are still holding a child” the woman mutters.

Regina stops, the proximity sweet torture. She can smell her and hear her and if she reaches out a little-  “Yes. You are right” even if every step is like walking in quicksand, she forces herself to continue until she has reached her chariot. She turns around again, at the forlorn-looking woman. “ Step in”.

She is really quick. As soon as her feet touch the chariot, Regina is urging the horses forward. Her hands only stop trembling when the woman covers them with one of hers, warm and slightly rough. It is perfect- or it would be if Regina’s body wasn’t thrumming with more more closer closer . She cannot even talk, apart from asking the woman for her name – “ Emma- and telling the servant to bring her horses to the stables.

She barely manages from tugging Emma towards her and she suspects Emma feels the same as she grabs Regina’s hand and nearly presses against her. They give Henry to one of the women that usually watches him- Regina presses a kiss to his forehead and leaves six guards with him- before Regina is tugging Emma , not towards the room that is for the girls she particularly likes, but towards her sanctuary.

Her personal chambers.

“ You are going to stop seeing those others” Emma growls

Regina bites on her lips, licks the blood of them. “ I am your ruler, you will not- “

Emma pushes her. “ If you want me, you will say goodbye to the others”.

“ Perhaps” she pants. She likes to have a little variety in her diet.

“I don’t share” Emma gasps between furious kisses.

Closer closer closer Regina finally gives in when Emma somehow finds the divine strength to put distance between them, instead of giving in to what they both want. “Fine “ she growls , not really furious even if a tiny and slowly disappearing part of her feels like she should be.

“ Fine?” Emma is still keeping their bodies apart and Regina grabs her arms and turns them. She smirks , then claims another kiss. This time, it is different. This time, the thrumming stops – no gentles and Regina feels calm for the first time in weeks. She sighs and hears Emma do the same.

Regina never believed in love. Not until she found her soulmate anyways.

[elmacintron4617-blog]

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