#SO nervous when i think ppl may be watching what im doing so while i was trying to unlock my car i knocked my bag over and a shirt and a ba

[perilegs]

i needed some coworkers to hear keekki's meow and the only place i had a video of it on hand was tumblr so i whipped out my keekki post and played it and one person saw my screen and i forgot to click it so it wouldnt display my username in the video player and. hm. now im scared.

[angelicgirlmj]

hey! <3

so, i have 2 questions, i dont want to pressure u tho ♡ first of all, been struggling with motivation to do my workouts/go to the gym and meditations recently becuase im a high key procrastinater and cant seem to stop, do you have any tips on how to keep motivated? xx

And second, i do a lot of class presentations at my school and constantly struggle with them, because of an ongoing anxiety about reading in front of others. apart from the fact I'm quite antisocial and have a couple of friends so i dont know ppl very well, i can't seem to find confidence, do you know any ways i can develop better social skills when it comes to public reading/speach? xxx tysm

hi angel! you sound so kind - of course i am so happy to answer your asks! ill break it up into two parts to help make it a little clearer and easier to read.

gym/meditation motivation: the first step is carving out time in your day for these and starting small. it’s pointless thinking okay ill do half an hour of meditation and two hours of working out a day if you dont have the time/energy to do that! instead make the time to begin your day with five minutes of meditation and try and do half an hour of working out, you can always build up the amount of time but you will feel better and more motivated if you are able to meet your goals and then expand them as opposed to feeling bad and shrinking them if you struggle to meet them. secondly i would say find workouts that appeal to you and are fun! dance, pilates and weightlifting are some of my favourite solo workouts but group workouts are so fun and you can experiment and find workouts that appeal to you. also if you like guided meditations try and find ones that interest/deeply calm you to make them more fun to follow. thirdly romanticise your workouts! create cute playlists, gym outfits, buy a cute yoga mat, do your hair and buy a pretty waterbottle. this will help you feel more encouraged and comfortable to workout and also feel way more of a fun event as you dress up etc. finally! reward yourself. after an hour of working out give yourself an hour of screen time, buy a cute drink, if you hit your monthly workout goal amount buy some jewellery or get a present for yourself. rewarding yourself and taking the time to look after your body and mind will help you feel more motivated.

this is a bit of a tricker question but hopefully i am able to help even a little bit. firstly you could try practicing reading presentations/work aloud. start by reading it to yourself until you feel confident pronouncing all the words and the speed you feel confident speaking at. then read to a trusted member of family or a friend and ask for feedback or improvements that you can adapt and hopefully feel better and more confident in your speech afterwards. secondly joining some kind of club/activity that requires you to speak could be very useful, for example a drama or debate club, even if you arent super active as a member or choose to do a more casual kind of group, being in a setting where public speaking is encouraged could help you feel more confident! thirdly watching/listening to speeches and body language of people doing public speaking or giving speeches can be really useful and help you focus on what you might need to improve on. finally while it seems difficult try and remember that almost every person in the room is also nervous about public speaking and reading aloud, they may just not show it. you arent the only person who struggles with this, so many people get anxious about public speaking and you should be able to feel better and more confident about it with time!

hopefully this has helped you! good luck, you sound so kind and lovely, im sure that with time you will feel better and more confident. love, m.

[girlboypersonthingy]

Hii!! I've noticed you haven't posted in a while and I wondered if you we're feeling okay.

If you can, could you write a pidge x fem reader on a birthday? Like what reader would for pidge's birthday or what pidge would so for reader's birthday. Either or both would be great since there aren't a lot of pidge fics around 😭😭😭

Thanks so much if you end up writing this!!

YESSSSSSS PIDGE IS SO BABY I LOVE HERRRR 🥹 obvi im gonna do both scenarios! Also, thanks for your concern, anon. 2023 started great and then the second half of the year just felt way too chaotic and overwhelming. I lost my motivation to write for a minute there. Still trying to get back into the swing of it. Anywaysssss ENJOY~

Pidge’s Birthday

Honestly, this babe would be so grateful to just have everyone on the team, you included, wish her a happy birthday at some point throughout the day.

Pretty much any gesture made after that would really make her special day even more special

And then you get/make her gifts and maybe even get everyone to very annoyingly sing her happy birthday and you and Hunk work really hard to make her a cake and-

And maybe you even give her a birthday kiss on the cheek or on her nose and she thinks she might just pass away rn

She feels very appreciated and seen.

This might just be me projecting and self-inserting here but I think Pidge would have a love hate feeling towards her birthday bc it lowkey hurts her feelings when ppl she’s close to don’t remember her bday bc I just know she always remembers everyone else’s and always wishes them a happy bday.

Like c’mon! Just shoot her a text at least!

Matt definitely gives her birthday punches every. single. year. Sorry just had to add that in here.

You can join in if you want but Pidge may feel a bit betrayed

If you decide to fight Matt and protect your girl instead, she’ll be cracking up laughing as she watched you two idiots goof off.

Probably tears up a tiny bit when everyone gathers in the same room to sing her happy birthday bc she feels so important but if you ask her if she’s crying she’ll for sure deny it.

Definitely wants to spend some alone time with you at the end of the day. Cuddles, playing video games in the darkness of her messy room, soft giggles and light blushes as you two share gentle lingering touches.

Thanks you profusely for caring enough to treat her so well on her bday

Reader’s Birthday

So if she knows when your birthday is ahead of time, she’ll totally take her time putting together some awesome birthday plans for your special day.

If she ends up finding out that your birthday is only a few days away, best believe she is running around like a wild beast, basically begging every other team member to help her put something decent together in just a couple days.

She looks so calm and chill on the outside, but inside she’s screaming and panicking and freaking out.

Tries her best, regardless of time restraints, to make your day completely stress free, fun and exciting.

Probably ends up doing some pretty simple things for you like helping Hunk make a cake, putting up some cheesy decorations, waking you up with breakfast and coffee in bed, getting everyone together to sing to you

BUT she makes sure that even these typical birthday gestures are just perfect for you.

Takes her time with the cake, even nitpicking Hunk as he tries to decorate the cake with icing.

Basically threatens anyone Keith who doesn’t want to join the happy birthday singing bc she’ll be damned if anyone is missing as they all swoon over you and watch you blush at their song.

Definitely makes you some cool tech gift like a little bot that follows you around and protects you or a cool little gadget you can listen to music on

Asks you at least 4,592 times throughout the day if you’re having fun, enjoying your day, feeling okay. She’s so sweet and considerate

She for sure wants to give you a bday kiss but baby girl is so so nervous, she can’t bring it up to you.

Doesn’t even have to be a kiss on the lips although she wouldn’t mind she just wants to give you at least one small show of affection before the end of the day.

Yeah, she holds your hand and gently rubs your back a few times throughout the day but that’s stuff she normally does so today, on your birthday, she wants to take it just a tad bit further

And you bet your ass she’s gonna ask you first bc consent is sexy okay?

“(Y/N)?” Her voice is shaky as she sits on her bed beside you.

“Yes?” And now the intense eye contact and heavy silence makes you both start panting.

“Can I kiss you?” Her pretty eyes are moving rapidly as she searches your face for any hint of protest and her own face is twisted up with anticipation.

You don’t even have to reply, just lean in and kiss the girl already!

It’s probably the simplest but ABSOLUTE BEST birthday you’ve ever had 💚

[berryunho]

pls i typed that ask at like 4am after the show i’m so surprised i got that many details bc half of the show feels like a blackout i literally ??? have videos of wooyoung that i don’t remember taking so when watching those i was like ah. wooyoung bias indeed i love him <3 AND LISTEN I GET WHAT UR SAYING but the loyal lifestyle just. isn’t for me. i’m loyal to atz only (not even) bc hj would k word me for LoOkInG aT oThEr OpPaS but. wooyoung. is a menace. he deserves the slander sometimes /lh

AND ! no one gets me the way san does bc WOOYOUNG’s hair is black when i wanted oreo but san did everything my delusional little brain manifested (aka wear the outfits i wanted him to) like ?? there is no way there won’t be an era of me having san as my bias </3 like listen.. i don’t wanna be delulu and stuff.. even tho i might be a little.. but a while ago i said i wanted san to wear sage green for a layout that i never even made.. n literally the next day he was on the radio or something wearing a green cardigan.. tell me he’s not meant to be my bias u literally can’t

also when i first started stanning atz it was wooyoung who pulled me in !! and weirdly i stayed loyal for a LONG time even when hongruella looked THAT fine during the last tour (literally. saw hongruella in the flesh on my bday. imagine. how did i stay loyal) but i always thought it was a bit weird?? bc i usually gravitate towards the introverts for literally any group/artist (tho i.. only stan atz rn.. oop hongjoong u better jot this down rn i am the most loyal atiny ever/j) so i thought it was a little bit out of order for me to like and stay loyal to THE extroverted social butterfly.. but then my bias line was completed with both infps aka my mbti.. and it suddenly made sense dhsjsh i just ! gravitate towards san a lil now AND ESPECIALLY AFTER THIS CONCERT he’s truly one of my fav comfort ppl like.. he said something and immediately after i was like WRITE THAT DOWN!!! and opened my notes app to write it down LMAO my friend was like wtf are u doing and i was like uh. comfort words??

last thing before i nap… san shyly dancing to cyberpunk for us again during the concert.. take my heart RN sir it’s literally! urs ! and thanks hwa for making that happen i died a lil

anyway i’m good and i hope you’re good as well <3 mwah mwah -san anon

HI !!!!

4am !!!!??$))(# wow you were quite coherent for 4am im also surprised LOL BUT THATS SO FAIR I GET IT ADJKFLASKJF its inevitable to jump around when you're a kpop stan like when 8 lovable men are presented to you .... why have only one bitch when you can have five ! KJLFDKSJAFSLJKDF

PLS THE MANIFESTING AKLDFJSKDFJ i love it i am a huge fan of being delulu i think life is too boring if you dont let yourself have a little joke around every once in a while AND BELIEVING THAT COINCIDENCES ARE MANIFESTATIONS.... IM HERE FOR IT !!!

eheheh i enjoy learning this lore about you san anon... i agree you are very strong for being loyal despite hongruella on your bday like .... thats crazy .... like i got my american ass on an airplane and flew to germany last may to see hongruella in the flesh .... in a completely loyal to yunho way of course ! JAKDJFSDFLJK BUT omg that actually is pretty interesting !!! id say yunho very much falls in line w my usual bias "type" lol but its funny bc that Type is just. the Opposite Of Me. BUT ANYWAYS hehe i get it ! all of them are just so ... <333 and literally why have i never thought of busting the notes app out that's actually so smart oh em gee ....

but ehehe san is so funny like how are we gonna be shy sir !!! after everything !!! hehe i hope your nap was good <3 im quite good ehehe a little bit nervous ........ but overall good hehe anything else exciting going on in your life san anon? hehe mwahhhh

[kanmom51]

hi, genuinely curious, why do you think you know so much about bts’s personal lives? like just shipping real people in general that you don’t now personally, bc i saw some of ur posts(not just u, a LOT of others seem to think the same) and i’m confused like how do you know all that from a video/photo?

Ask 2:  hi i think i might have sounded rude in my last anon and im so so sorry if i did, i don’t mean to sound mean but english isn’t my first language and i don’t now how else to write it.

What i mean is i just can’t see it, but so many ppl including you seem convinced jimin and jungkook are a couple? i now there’s probably something i’m missing that’s obvious to everyone else bc to me they just seem like really good and close friends, so like what is it that you think makes it obvious?? (again i’m just genuinely curious abt this pls don’t take it the wrong way 💜)

I’m not clairvoyant and don’t claim to know what goes on behind closed doors.  I have said time and time again that we have no way of knowing what goes on when the cameras are off or when they are in private, unless they tell us.

I do speculate sometimes and make assumptions based on the content I’ve seen, but always original content, and not edited clips.  

I have also made it clear every single time that these are my opinions and conclusions, take them or leave them.

There is a ton of BTS content out there to go through, which includes, just as an example (because there is so much more):  Run BTS episodes, interviews (video, written and radio), member Tweets, memories, Bon Voyage, packages (summer, winter), Bangtan bombs, fan meets, Musters, concerts etc.

You need to watch original content, because, and it saddens me to say this, there is some Jikook YT content that is distorted, edited, slow motioned to fit the story, and not all of it is ‘real’ in the sense, that if you see the original content, see the true moment within it’s context and in real speed, well, it isn’t a ‘real’ moment.  I have called out some of those moments in the past.

But there are things you can’t fake.  

There a several moments that solidified for me the special connection between JK & JM.  

Watch original content over the years and you will see there is something special between those two, a special and strong connection.  JK clearly finds JM as someone he can confide in and someone that can calm him or console him in times of need.  He has said it in interviews and we have seen him do so in the content out there.

JM is JK’s anchor.  His safe place.

JK is JM’s happy place.  When JM is down JK is the one who knows how to cheer him up.  Even Jin had mentioned it once in an interview.

JK is JM’s protector in sorts.  We’ve seen them at the airports, we’ve seen him carry JM after concerts.

They are super close.  We know they constantly choose to travel together in the same car (when every member has their own car and they are the only ones together)...  They choose spend ‘off time’ together - bowling, going to watch a movie, ice skating with each other.  JK himself told us in BV4 that the only members he sae during their time off were JM & Hobi.  They are just super close.

So what made me make the one step further and conclude they are romantically involved?

There are several things that pushed me over the edge.  Some of them are:

First, the content, again.  There is content out there that is way beyond “we are very close platonic friends”.  Things they say or do in front of the camera that give you so much “we are a couple” vibe. 

There is content that makes you feel like you are intruding on a very intimate private moment: 

MAMA 2018 is one of them.  I can’t say one, because there are so many moments there that are “WOW, what’s going on here?”

Rose Bowl is also such a moment that is as clear as day, with no acceptable logical explanation other than: “there is something more between those two”.  

Those are only 2 examples, but there are many more such moments, where the intimacy level is way more than even the best platonic friendship out there.

You don’t need to be a rocket scientist to put 1 & 1 together here.  These moments are loud and clear.

There are the more subtle moments too, those that add up on you, those that if you will look at each of them by themselves you would say: “yeah, nothing here”, but when you put them together, another one and another one and another one, well the conclusion is pretty much clear.

It’s JM’s Tweets, their matching clothing over the years, their choice to spend time together, their private trip, GCFT, JK’s choice to put JM front and center in all his other GCF’s, the way they look at each other, the way they talk about each other, the two very famous lives from 2016 (Tae’s & Hobi’s), their own lives (OMG), things JM tells us (like waking up and seeing JK is what makes him happy these days), “you are me I am you”,  the way they touch, especially during the first few years (2016-2018), those hesitant light touches & brushes (if skinship is not an issue here, why do they hesitate so much to touch each other??? when they have no problem doing so with the others, all when we do know just how close they are), the way they talk to each other, they way JK lets JM get away with shit, while he doesn’t the other members, the way JK drops honorifics with JM +++++ so much more.

There another couple of independent points that helped to push me over the edge too.  

The first is the other members reactions when JK & JM go on with their shenanigans.  RM, Hobi, Jin, Suga & Tae all react differently, each and every one of them has a tell.  Suga and Tae go blank many times.  Jin lowers his head.  Hobi either had a worried look on his face or a big fat smile, and RM, well he’s the most obvious out of the lot.  It’s facial expressions, uneasy movement, fisting his thighs, looking to Hobi or Suga with pleading eyes, running to the two thinking he might have to defuse a moment, separating the two when he feels it’s needed.  It’s all that and then some.  Now if there is nothing ‘more’ going on between those two, why is all of that even necessary???  Those two’s interactions on camera just make the rest of the group nervous, especially RM.  Ask yourself the question: why??  

Another thing I keep asking myself is, if these two are clearly super close, why is there a constant need to downplay their closeness?  This is something that is done by BTS and BH as well as the fandom.  And I find it hard to understand, again, if there is nothing extra going on between them, why downplay them.  You may disagree with me on this, but to me it seems they are way closer than JM & Tae, but they are called ‘soulmates’ while JK & JM are ‘nothing’? It’s like they are there, and it’s clear as day just how close they are, but it’s not a subject they are allowed to talk about.  And the way the fandom is as much as ignoring it also raises so many questions for me.  If this is an innocent platonic close friendship, why ignore it?  How come the fandom isn’t celebrating it? 

Thing is, that not only does the fandom ignore their connection, they are being hated for it.  The level of anti and hatred  out there towards them is unbelievable.  And yet again, that raises the question of why?  If nothing is going on there why such anti towards those two, together, in particular?

At the end of the day, I guess life experience is probably what helps me out here.  I have been around for a while, experienced love and heartbreak, and also a long term relationship. I know the signs, you could say.  It helps being able to assess a situation and read into it.  

It’s ok to question yourself.  I do so constantly.  I watch and re-watch content.  I read interviews, I question my logic, my conclusions.  I, just like any normal person, do have self doubt at times.  Believe me, I would not have written what I have before checking and re-checking myself.  And still, these are my conclusions.  I believe that JK & JM are not only super close, but also romantically involved.  There you have it.

[sunnyasswaffles]

KNY characters playing among us

these headcanons are entirely for joke purposes and because im bored

Tanjiro

- as a crewmate this dude would be set on doing all of his tasks as well as keeping a good eye out for anything suspicious. whoever the imp is, would probably get annoyed with his ass cuz they cant hide anything from this mf. everyone believes him too. He usually is never the one to get killed at the beginning because everyone else will come for the imposters ass

- as an imposter he would either:

1. do absolutely nothing and kill no one because he would feel bad

or

2. kill someone, report it, and come clean because he can’t lie and he probably feels bad

if there are multiple imposters he would probably just sabotage and let his partner(s) do all the dirty work.

Nezuko

as a crewmate she would probably just follow tanjiro around not caring about doing her tasks or not unless she dies. if someone managed to kill tanjiro before her she would flip shit, as well as literally everyone playing-

as an imposter killing would be hella hard for her as tanjiro is following her everywhere but once she manages to get away she’s a literal god until tanjiro catches on and rats her out. she may be good but she doesnt last long as an imp 😔✋

Zenitsu

as a crewmate he would either be glued to tanjiro or too scared to be near literally anyone. He’s that one player that freaks out when someone starts following him for .5 seconds.

as an imposter he wouldnt last long cuz he would sound way too nervous when trying to defend himself and the other players would be like “yeah its him 😐”

Inosuke

as a crewmate he would be set on finding the imposter(s) he gets called out a lot cuz people think he’s the imposter cuz he’s following people around all the time. Never does his tasks and throws out dumb assumptions about random people because he finds everything suspicious. the mf would probably say something like “i saw sanemi walk out of medbay, the dude vented!” right after genya said he watched him scan. he uses “sus” unironically

as an imposter he would literally sabotage everything (if he has a partner this would annoy the everliving fuck out of them) and kill anyone on sight. probably makes stupid decisions like killing/venting in front of people without meaning to and then getting hella defensive when people sus him out. he sometimes tries to shift the blame or blames them before they have a chance to speak but gets caught anyways.

Genya

as a crewmate he would just do his tasks and not give a fuck about anyone unless someone tries to blame him for something or sus him out he gets really defensive and angry, if theyre playing through a voice call you cant understand what he’s saying because he’s yelling and his mic is ass so it just sounds like bass boosted tv static.

as an imposter he’s good but the dude can’t lie for shit so as soon as someone catches him in a loop he either says nothing cuz he dunno what to say or gets mad and defensive trying to put the blame on the other dude.

Giyuu

as a crewmate he’s either the first one to get killed or he gets blamed for killing and voted out. Tanjiro and Nezuko are probably the only one���s who defend him.

as an imposter he either goes god mode and kills like 5 people before a body is reported or gets voted out at the beginning.

Shinobu

does her tasks first thing as a crewmate and often complains in frustration at whoever called a meeting/reported a body while she was in the middle of a download task. (i dont blame you shinobu that shits annoying) she also tries to find reasons to frame giyuu.

as an imposter this bitch is a literal GOD she’ll kill everybody and no one will suspect her. a smart and manipulative imposter indeed-

Rengoku

as a crewmate he would definitely be set on completely his tasks first. pretty observant and calls people out on their bs (nicely ofc). is usually the first one to check ppl do shields/trash/weapons etc. If anyone tries to blame him for something he would defend himself lookin like ���� the whole time. if its in a voice call he’s probably one of the mfs that eats into the mic.

as an imposter he wouldn’t kill anyone he would call an emergency meeting and come clean because “killing people is wrong” i can also see him ratting out his partner too if he has one 😬

Tokito

as a crewmate he would mind his business and not talk in chat unless he had a reason to but his responses are always dry and short like “no” or “no i didn’t” he doesn’t even give a reason even if he’s innocent which gets him voted off a lot of the time. he also would defend literally anything tanjiro says.

as an imposter he would be okay at killing people but if people would call him out he would just be like “yeah i killed them 😐” he doesn’t even try to lie about it.

Sanemi

like his brother, this mf would get easily angry and defensive if you tried to call him suspicious or frame him when he is a crewmate. probably cant understand what he’s saying either cuz this dude is loud as hell. he yells and cusses at people who try to prove him wrong or counter argues with him. he gets voted off a lot because of how defensive he is :/ he also insults people. 😁 he finds reasons to frame giyuu with.

as an imposter he’s really good at killing and covering up his tracks but as soon as someone thinks its him he gets pissed and defensive (likely calling them a stupid dumbass or sumn), which is what usually gets hime voted off. the dude probably slams on his keyboard and cries when he’s voted off.

Obanai

like tokito if this dude was a crewmate he would mind his own business and not talk in chat unless he was being blamed or being called suspicious. he doesnt get defensive but he wouod probably get annoyed and call whoever was blaming him stupid. follows mitsuri everywhere and defends her with his entire soul because he’s a simp. also likes to frame giyuu

as an imposter he would still stick with mitsuri and she wouldn’t snitch ✋ they would team even if they’re on different teams and he would end up killing everyone except her. people get annoyed when they play with them together. but if mitsuri wasn’t playing he would be those imposters that would kill and say nothing in the chat but gets away with it somehow.

Mitsuri

as a crewmate she wouldn’t care much about tasks but would still do them to pass the time. sticks with obanai, rengoku, or shinobu depending on who’s playing. always trusts and defends her friends which sometimes ends up getting her killed- also someone who would probably eat into their mic

as an imposter she would stick with obanai and team with him (lord help when theyre both imposters theres no escape) she wouldnt kill any of her friends tho so if she has a partner she’ll leave that to them but feel guilty about it.

Uzui

as a crewmate he would preferably go on his own and avoid people. is the crewmate that forgets the map and whenever someone asks where he was he can’t answer and gets voted out sometimes. and excellent lie detector, he calls people out on their bullshit. uses terms like “sus”, “noob”, “cap”/“no cap”, etc. so much to the point where its painfully cringy.

as an imposter he would be an excellent liar but if he ended up getting caught red handed he would just come clean. would kill his friends first because he thinks its funny.

Akaza

as a crewmate he would only do the easy tasks because he doesn’t have the patience to deal with download or time consuming tasks. like sanemi, this dude gets easily defensive and pissed when people try to frame him but he confronts them in a passive aggressive condescending way cuz he’s petty. sometimes frames people for fun, mainly tries to frame douma. follows rengoku around in an attempt to annoy him

as an imposter he is good but he tries to kill douma every time he’s an imposter so if douma’s dead at the beginning of the round everyone suspects him. often goes after zenitsu too, doesn’t kill the girls if they’re are any playing.

Douma

as a crewmate this mf is annoying as hell to play with. he’s the crewmate that plays devil’s advocate to confuse people for the fun of it. also tries to frame random people for drama and often gets voted out of it-

as an imposter this dude is an og- he’s good at playing innocent and will gaslight/manipulate people that try to call him out. Akaza, Shinobu, and him argue the whole meeting pretty much.

[yamagucji]

love letters from cupid.

dear lovely anons,

i cherish every bit of interaction we have. im extremely grateful to know that there are people out there who read and enjoy my works. hm, hope you know that i care about each of you. honestly sometimes i just wanna make a post dedicated to each of you but idk!! if you’ll see it or not. hopefully this bit is enough to let you know how much i appreciate every single one of you. thank you.

dear readers,

thank you for reading my works. it’s comforting to know that there are people out there who will check out something that i’ve slapped on together with every bit of my effort. to those of you who have consistently supported my works in silence- you know who you are. im just... keeping my distance because ya’ll are really just minding your own business while i get giddy about seeing you pop up in my notifications again. im hoping to get around and send a ty note to as many special readers n special ppl on this blog. but im a little shy, so i hope you’ll give me some time. seeing you in my notifications from time to time makes me happy; sometimes i do wonder if you’re still here and in good health. i hope you all are right now. thank you.

dear dani,

what a wonderful being you are. never regretting the first time i *shyly* asked if there was anyone that wanted to be friends here. i probably already talk about my love for you and vera so much but who’s gonna stop me? you’re such a cool person. i look up to you (literally). i think it’s amazing to get to know a person who has a lot of passion for history like me. but also- screams about 2d men with me. truthfully, this site is much more bearable having you as a moot. i feel very comfortable talking to you, about anything at all. lomve you, you’re the best.

dear mayya,

kindness personified. im sure you’ve made a plethora of people smile with every rb and comment you’ve given; including me. i think it’s very refreshing to see such genuine comments. you radiate this calm aura that im always seeking for. thank you, for providing me (and many other people) with that. a little embarrassing that you see my uhm, messy sideblog, but... it’s comforting i think. to know that someone is listening. i hope that you understand it goes the other way around too— that i’m here for you.

dear hrituja,

my partner of chaos. when did it start? i can’t remember. all i know is that every little thing you send me on instagram really makes my day. i’ll have bad days and all i need to do is look at the silly stuff you sent me and get a laugh out of it. i think it’s cool that we’ve been able to build this space where we can talk about anything (literally), poke fun of each other, and also ourselves. you’re cool. i genuinely like hearing you go off about ace. if i could meet a moot it’d probably be you unless you’re secretly a fraud and you’re actually just a 80 yr old man looking for a sugar babie. in that case im in.

dear oz,

you overly sweet bean. i genuinely watch you in awe from afar, just by how talented and hardworking you are. your art is amazing, and i always look forward to the design you make for your oc’s outfits. thank you for understanding me, and for being patient with me. i care about you a lot, so if there’s ever anything that’s occupying your mind and you need to let them out, i’m here to listen. ps. i really don’t know any other mutual who listens to *that* comfort stuff like i do so im really thankful to have someone to talk about them with. you can always share your interests with me too, especially with your dearest tendou.

dear tate,

im such in awe of you. just the fact that you devote a lot of your time into writing and setting up the theme for your blog astounds me. not to mention, your art skills as well. i am still very much in love with that bokuto piece you made with the hanging leaves. i hope you know that bokuto loves you just as much as you do to him. i know you’re writing up something special atm, so i’m really looking forward to it. thank you for all the time you’ve spared just to send me an ask. it truly does mean a lot to me. it feels like someone is listening, and i’m very appreciative of having you as my dear mutual. please know that i’m here to support you too, with the best of my abilities.

dear winx club,

[ @wissbby @kageruna @pinkbunnyplushie @astrooliver @lovingtobio @kenmaki @lfjr @lcsbianist ]

im such a clutz, but thank you for dealing with me. i was little nervous to start up such a discord server because im bad at staying in one. though, the warm environment that you all provide makes me feel much more at ease. i think it’s funny popping in to the server and seeing a few people spamming the chat with hugs, headpats and kisses. it’s sweet, too. being in a group discord can get overwhelming for some people, so i appreciate you all for having that patience. another thing- thank you for understanding each other’s boundaries. its hard to be aware all the time especially when you’re interacting with people you don’t know to at a very personal level. im glad that you all helped each other make the space comfy. i look forward to more chaotic and genuine talks with all of you in the future. maybe we’ll still be in touch with each other after a long while? who knows. but im going to cherish every single moment i get with you all.

dear @nishinoya-is-baby @keitsukki11 @sullen-angel24 @smolbludandelions @whootwhoot @cheatingthroughthislife @tadashi-simp @oikaw-ugh @lostsealscreams @sleepykarabou @atsunflower @lfjr @globe-fish @bewwybun @tetsoleil @sleepykarabou @justcafewriter @rin-suna @atsumusc0ck @waitforitillwritemywayout @dorkyhaikyu @yemilnisu @sunseteyes @kenmaki @kenanami,

goodness, i would write you all individual messages if time let me. but, i hope this is alright. i just wanted to thank you all for interacting with some dummy like me because that shit takes real patience </3 y’all are some really cool people and im really glad to have you as a moot. im ngl im pretty sure i’ve stopped by all your inboxes just to forget to actually send an ask :’( or maybe im too shy. one or the other. hopefully i can come around to all your ask boxes soon and fill it with my love because it’s what you all deserve. ya’ll are such amazing and talented people. for the love of god- you have all my love and care in the world. i hope that these past few weeks have been gentle with you, but if not, please let yourself rest from whatever it is that may be putting you down. here’s a gentle reminder that im always here to listen, and i wouldn’t judge you for whatever it is it may be. thank you for being so kind to me, and i hope to return that as well. take care.

@insanitywrites @derpeedoo @killuababie @lespaghetti @ordinary-ace

i haven’t told you this until now but, thank you for giving me company and comfort during a time that i was deeply struggling.

ps. if there’s any grammar or spelling mistakes no u did not see that <3

[hotwings0203]

Okay idk wtf this is too but I’m bored at work so lemme do smthn rq.

Songs That Inspire My Works

Scary Yandere Songs:

Mezzanine-the song is sung is a very gritted-teeth type of way. Almost like the yandere is sitting in a dark room on a chair, just staring at a picture of the darling or mindlessly watching tv, positively seething about how giddy and happy she is. There’s one part of the song that goes “All these half floors will lead to mine” and it just makes me think of him basically saying that he’s gonna make her fall off her high horse and succumb to his level. Very Shigaraki vibes for a happy bubbly girl.

Still- verrryyy crazy drunk shigaraki vibes. The song was actually based on the lead singer who played with bones on a train track when he was younger. When the lyrics say “follow me into the trees, I will lead the way” that line gives me chills

Maidaiz-any generic yandere tbh, usually Dabi-actually, maybe Hawks cuz the voice is so smooth and buttery, and he’s singing about a chained girl surrounded by jewels and pearls. Idk it kinda fueled my Gilded Cage fic cuz he showered her with all this money and she still was just a captive at the end of the day

Dangerous- reminds me of kuroiro and tamaki sometimes, nothing too big here, just the reader feeling like they’re being watched by an unseen force

Kilmaa- OOOO now this is a good one cuz the whole music video and song itself is about a girl kidnapped into sex slavery basically and breaking out. In the video the girl is captured by this big powerful business man/mafia type guy, and at the end of all her trauma she stabs the guy and k/lls him. I’m thinking maybe hawks or dabi cuz yknow, big scary powerful guy gets his share of dues or whatever.

In For It- the song isn’t too scary on its own but just the slow kind of raspy way Tory Lanez sings makes me think of a darling in a club and is just dancing around when she sees maybe Bakugo staring her down all menacingly and lustful. She gets nervous and tries to avoid eye contact, but at the end of the song when it gets deeper and slower at the “I’m so offended” part, it makes me imagine he gets up and starts going after her.

Angst or Fluff

Turning Page-maybe makes me think of shigaraki or tamaki, very soft boys on the inside (and out for tamaki), like they start watching you out of the corner of their eyes unconsciously to catch you smiling or laughing. One of my fav lines is in there, “Your love was my turning page/where only the sweetest words were made” and idk it just makes me all mushy and soft

American Girls and French Kiss- I wrote a dabixhawks fic a while back, not one of my most popular pieces but I still had fun writing it. It was before 290 came out and everyone thought dabi knew who hawks was cuz of the childhood friends theory, and this song was kind of like a “fuck you im fine but not” vibe that went along with the angst potential of that side

Hold On Till May- this one I feel like can be used for dabi or shigaraki and their backstories. The song itself is about one of Vince’s ex gfs who was abused at home and would run away and wait for her parents to come find her(spoiler alert-they would never care enough to go after her). So I think in terms of backstories and exploring that part with the darling or character, you could take it both ways-either the guy is singing to the girl that it will all be okay, and that even though they’re both broken he’ll try for her. OR if it’s from the darling’s POV she could be saying like even though the character (Dabi or shiggy) have had a rough life shes there for them now.

Berenstein- super angsty song, reminds me of my ex tbh. Berenstein refers to (if I remember correctly) a memory shared by others even though the memory didn’t actually happen. I always think of this whenever there’s an ending where the character has to leave the reader and one day just reminisces about what they had. It’s like in the end they’ll move on and their lives don’t really change in terms of lifestyle of daily activities, but if they think back far enough, they can catch a glimpse of someone who used to be their everyhting. Very much dabi and shig.

Stay With Me- bakugo vibes, it’s like two ppl fighting and telling each other that the other was the one who left, but ultimately it doesn’t matter because he just wants them back and to not leave.

102- a lot of the 1975 songs get me in my feels (which is a tragedy cuz Matty Healy is islamophobic as fuck) and this one is another one. Major Dabi or Kirishima vibes, the song is about being friends and in love with a girl who is in love with someone else. It’s like you don’t know what to do with yourself and all that love you have for her

Anyways yeah if any of y’all wanna chime in w ur own fic song recommendations just reblog and continue this ig?? Tag people, or not lol just read all of this bs and have fun w it🤷🏽‍♀️

[smutty-ki113r]

okay sooo. I have been in toby x me x jeff; brainrot mode; all fuckn day.

Also yeah I've met both of them while shifting. (I am open to any questions abt it lol.) the thing is; i am super shy when i like someone; so i haven't talked to either of them one on one. I hang out with the both of them and ben like all four of us and ben just makes sure i don't do anything weird/akward cuz he knows ig. Oh and uhm apparently me and nina are like besties now?? I don't know how that happened but yeah. Not sure how jeff feels abt that-

I don't know how to pursue toby or jeff. I am to scared of being rejected.(i know some ppl may think it's silly cuz i am shiftong and I shouldn't be scared but like it feels so real) i know they think i am funny and stuff. They wouldn't hang out if they didn't think so. I also don't write scripts so it's basically a free for all.

Uhm anyways- if u want some of my brainrot I'll GLADLY tell u

-🃏

Oml.

*inhales really really dramatically*

Fuck i do the same. I get so nervous talking to people I like… and BOYS??!! Fucking. Sometimes I’ll be head over heels and never even talk to them, just sort of stand there and watch yes I know im creepy and fall in love.

You need to talk to them. Like. This is an order, from me. So you have to do it. (I mean not really but still). Bruh, you have the opportunity half of us on this acc would will kill for. I swear to god im gonna come over there and smack some sense into you. First step is one on one time. PLEASE. Idk, get them to help you do something, or accompany you to lunch or smtg.

I don’t write scripts either btw, I completely trust in my subconscious. YES tell us all the brain rot. Ill just be here sobbing while I read it cause I haven’t shifted yet. BRB i actually did start crying………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..ok im back. Haven’t stopped crying but i can concentrate on what i wanna say now.

Nope. Nope. Fuck i cant even think about it. Just the idea makes me sob. Fuck im a crybaby. Cue Melanie Martinez. Nvm this is how i cope. Ok wait i stopped.

It IS fucking real. Thats what im scared of i guess. But its the first time i actually wanna go after someone, or at least just be with him??? Fuck i just wanna see him so bad. Fuck FUCK the tears came back-

[letthefrogsbe]

remember when I was gonna write that parkner fic?

cool so I've decided I'm gonna, but because I cannot write for SHIT and I hate my writing every time I see it, ill just share my outline of what I have so far. its not coherent. sorry. 

Section one: aunt may dies. It’ll be like “it's been 3 months. 3 months since May was shot. 2 months and 3 weeks since she died.”

Something like that idc. Basically this section will base around peter living tony, because he’s not doing well, and he is only 17- which is not actually old enough to be on your own after something like this. Setting is established, with cameos from dr strange (who tony is dating and lives with (yeah bite me, this is my fanfiction i can make it what i want.) it will be made obvious that this takes place after endgame, which also means that tony is Not going to die. I’m not that mean lmao. The avengers are like largely together, there was not as much death in this as there was in endgame. Whatever. Everyone is very nice to peter because they know that for him its either this or him becoming a ward of the state so like.

Section two: harley gets kicked out. His mom finds out that he’s gay (from gossip sources idk) and kicks harley out. Im not going to write them having a big fight like in the moment, but harley will recount what happened somewhat to tony in this section, and then more to peter later in the story. Gay ppl trauma dump, we know this. Okay anywaysss so harley calls tony literally sobbing and like freezing fucking cold. IM SORRY IM BEING SO MEAN TO THEM I PROMISE THEY'LL GET A HAPPY ENDING. Okay. harley explains how his mom kicked him out. Tony asks why, harley says something like “she didn’t agree with my lifestyle choices” like bitterly. Tony is a good person in this (i know, im really taking some character liberties) and he’s in the mood for collecting strays apparently, so he has happy send over the quinjet. He can’t make it himself bc hes in fucking japan or something for the next few weeks,, but. Yeah! Tony also calls peter, who is presumably in bed and feeling depressed. “Hey pete. How ya feeling? Any better?’ ‘Not really, tony. Sorry.’ ‘you don’t have to be sorry-’ ‘damn tony you sound like my therapist.’ “sorry pete, but i do have something to tell you- you know harley?’ ‘only from what you’ve told me about him, but yea. He was the tennessee garage kid, right?’ ‘i mean. Yes. so- he’s gonna come stay with me for a while too- it might not be permanent but it will probably be a bit. He’s about your age, and he just has no where to go (just like u). He’s not going to stay in your room or anything, but with bruce and thor here, he will be in your apartment area.’ ‘okay tony.. Will i have to talk to him a bunch?’ ‘not if you don’t want to- i already warned him about you, so it should be okay. I wouldn’t worry so much pete- you guys are so similar in a lot of ways that i wanted to introduce you two long before he called me.’ ‘okay tony, i trust you. Thank you again for letting me stay with you :)’ (yeah that kind of got away from me)

Section 3: build up. this is a shorter section. Harley and peter are gonna meet in section 4. This section is harley’s jet ride (with an intuitive happy) and harley’s nerves about how he really isn’t worth this (i mean hes pretty intimidated tony sent a private jet just for him) and happy like reassures him. Hes still insecure though. Peter is also nervous bc what if harley doesn’t like him? What if he doesn’t like harley?? Tony did say they would get along, but peter hasn’t really been himself recently, so who knows? Yeah lots of that. I do want to emphasize though- peter is not completely unhealthily coping. Like he has a therapist and he has been reaching out to ned and mj, but its still an open wound for him. Obviously. He still has a sense of humor though, but its to cover these deep insecurities. Like the first month or so that he was with tony, he was reallllyyyy trying to not get close to him bc he sort of thinks he kills everyone around him. Like logically he knows this isn’t true, but he does really think the that non superheroes that he surrounds himself with are very at risk if they know about his spider-man-ness. The only people who know now are ned and mj (may knew too).

Section 4: the meeting of harley and peter. Keep in mind peter has been living in this apartment/area of stark tower for about 3 months now. He actually moved in while may was in the hospital because he couldn’t stand to be alone in the apartment when he knew why may wasn’t there. And um. Yeah. so peter is like comfortable in this space, basically. Also- the reason theyre in the same apartment is because stark tower was not really created with the idea of housing broken orphans in mind, so it only has a certain amount of residential space. Thor and bruce are currently staying there together (although no one really knows if theyre together, or if theyre just best bros who went through some extreme trauma together and are now inseparable. Hmmm wonder if thats gonna come up later) and theyre using one apartment, and happy lives there with his own apartment, and tony and stephen are currently sharing the penthouse, even though thats not public knowledge. Really only the people close to tony know that he’s dating stephen. So. this leaves just the one other 2 bedroom apartment for peter and harley. It has one bathroom, and the bedrooms are connected by a door but theyre pretty big so like. Theres a kitchen, a living room with a fancy ass tv, and a really pretty view (with a balcony bc <333). May died in march, peter got leave from the school in april, and it is now the middle of june btw. Tony is now peter’s official guardian (he was before may died anyways) and now has sole guardianship over him which he has fully accepted, even though peter and him both know that there are going to be times where he has to go out of town bc he does own a company after all. Times like right now. Harley is pretty nervous that tony isn’t going to be there to greet him and that he is going to have to like introduce himself to peter and everything. Cmon, theres no reason to feel like that, he’s the one intruding after all, he should at least be able to handle himself. (<--- harley’s thoughts). Yeah so theyre insecure super cool. A n y w a y s so peter was stressing about harley as he arrived, and so when harley walked in they were both complete bundles of nerves. Harley walks up but knocks. Peter actually jumps (bc spidey sense okay whatever) and goes to get the door. Oh my god these awkward teenagers i hate them so much (i love them). Peter kinda looks like shit, sorry king. He was a little bit crying earlier, then tony called and he switched into stressed out ball-of-anxiety mode. Distractions are good, its okay. Peter opens the door for harley and they like introduce each other all awkward (again sorry) and peter shows harley where he is staying. Harley doesnt really have muchhhh bc he was kicked out and all. He just has a suitcase full of clothes, his favorite blanket, his favorite stuffed animal (yeah whatever bc ofc he does) and his phone/charger. He sets all his stuff down at once. He thanks peter for letting him stay in his apartment and also said sorry. First thing peter noticed was harley’s accent. Stfu. peter asks why harley’s here- ok. Harleys had a long ass day. Too fucking long. He- he breaks down. He tells peter a lot. About how his mom found out that he was gay, and how she told him never to come back. Yikes. Anyways, this is establishing the beginning of their relationship as friends. Peter is there for him even though he doesn’t know him at all. Peter sees some of himself in harley in this moment, even though he’s not talking about himself yet. Eventually harley does ask about peter, and they really just get to know each other really quick. They have these deep scarring individual traumas, and neither has nearly recovered, but they find comfort in just knowing that theyre not alone in their suffering. At least for now. At least in this moment.

Section 5: the next day. Peter and harley spent that whole night talking about what they were going through. Peter said good night at around 5 am (there were no adults around they can do what they want to) and they both got good sleeps. In peter’s case, one of the first solid nights he’s had in a while. Harley was kept up a little longer after peter left, however, because he just couldn’t shut off his mind. It was really cathartic for him to just lay everything out there and for someone to just accept him. Peter told him he was bi, but he was.. Lucky. He had accepting people in his life. May was accepting. God, harley couldn’t fathom having lost everyone in his life, everyone he ever cared about, and still having the heart to sit and talk with the dumbass anxious gay kid who can’t go home anymore. His problems felt so small compared to peter’s, and all he could do was admire peter’s resilience and how he was seemingly able to bounce back from anything. God, peter was something. He couldn’t wait to get to know him more. With that thought circling in his head, he finally went to sleep at oh shit 6:30 am. Peter woke up around 1. Harley at 2. When harley woke up, peter was watching tv and eating cereal on the couch and he just sat down next to him. No words, just sleepy children being sleepy. They stayed like this for like an hour when someone knocked on their door. Enter stephen strange!!!!!!!!!!! Get excited people. Hes just coming in to check on them bc tony told him to, and he didn’t get the chance last night bc he was _busy_. K so now he’s here and hes awkward and he just wants to make sure these boys r okay bc theyve both been through too much recently, and it would be just the cherry on top if they didn’t get along. Him and harley had never actually met before so he like introduced himself and all that. Offered like if they needed anything he was there, and its only gonna be a few days until tony gets back (did i say a week earlier? Im retconning that bc i cannot find it in my writing so it is now retconned). Peter and harley just have to sort of explain to dr strange that theyre getting along gREAT and there is no need for concern….. And peter was even thinking about showing harley around the city a bit that night (something he had not yet told harley, but wanted to make it seem like he was doing well and not acting too depressed in front of Dr. Strange) so dr strange is like yeah !!!!!! do that, that sounds super fun petey !!!!!! and so now they have evening plans

ok ps I wrote this like 2 weeks ago and completely forgot I posted something on Tumblr about this fic idea, and so this is literally just how I talk to myself. was not gonna ever post this but then I decided to because I'm bored. there are more sections but I'm not gonna post them rn because this post is really fucking long already!!!!

[starsxinxthexbluexsky]

Hi, there. I just wanted to add to your last ask my thoughts. As for me I’m more like GG (we could also date haaaa). But I think ppl often interpret his politeness as if he’s naive and too trustful. I just want to add at first we can clearly see his development from his XFire days till now. Even then, if you watch his XFire vligs and interviews you could see he’s actually a warm person outside but a little cold inside. What I mean (it’s my personal opinion, ok?). It’s that being warm and polite doesn’t always mean that the person is open for you like a book, and being cold doesn’t mean rude but it means that he lets only few ppl get really closer to him. Only the ones he can trust and with time flying I think he got more careful about ppl around. It’s just like me. I have friends, mates from work, college. But such ppl like me and gg are really hard to trust ourselves fully to someone. We’d better hold our worries and problems to ourselves as we don’t want and don’t see the point to burden others with your problems as everyone’s life is hard and instead we’d better listen to other people and coax them. Besides, I can’t say here for gg for sure, but I can feel something familiar that we want ppl to love us, but not because we want something from them, we just want ppl to like us because if they don’t we start to look for a reason not in ppl but in ourselves. (What did I do wrong? Maybe I talk very strange? Maybe I said not right word) and it makes you feel bad. Especially if u’re a perfections and want everything to be done right. And one more important moment, as for such ppl like me and gg it’s important to keep your face, be well-mannered because it’s good, it’s accepted in public, it’s what most ppl like and what’s make them happy. But we are not toys, we can’t always be in a good mood and very nice. So we also have this naughty side that we can’t show to most ppl, as we are afraid to be misunderstood and that ppl will hate it. So we behave naughty only with close ppl as we’re sure that they will accept any side we show

Ahhhhh!!! Anon, I have loved your comment (about going out, who knows? 👀👀👀😂😂) I have other questions before yours, but I preferred yours. Does that make me a bad girl 😂😂?

Fake. CPN. I don't pretend to offend anyone with this post.

Actually I understand quite little about GG's personality (but, I understand him more since, I think they're SZD, than before), thanks for explaining me a bit, the truth is, if he seemed lonely in X-Nine, something like he was warm and gentle in that time too, but i think he was feeling belittled by his company when he's a pearl, that must have made him feel very sad. Also, I forgot to add to the other response, that he needs someone to tell him that he is the best, because sometimes he thinks that he isn't that and it's sad for me to see him belittle himself.

In my case I am more similar to DD and if you allow me I will explain my version, since you explained yours 😂😂.

If you see him with UNIQ, he got along with his brothers and there is a lot of trust, as with the TTXS brothers (although I think DD likes to talk more with people much older than him) He must act cute because he had to win some fame, but that wasn't really DD's personality and it's really weird for me to see him on UNIQ (not because I think he felt lonely with the UNIQ members, but after he got away from them). Sometimes, when I saw him, after UNIQ separated. I thought he was a little lost, I am 1 year younger than him, but he seemed lonely at times too. (I don't want to offend anyone).

Both, he and I hate being in physical contact with strangers, especially if cause misunderstands. It gives me chills just thinking about it ... 😄😄😄

Most of the time I am very nervous around new people and when they approach me in a friendly manner, I give them an intense look (as if analyzing them), I don't care much what is socially accepted. if I don't like you, I won't talk to you, I'll pass. I have a bad mood, little patience and I am self-centered, I always want attention of my closest people. I will feel sad if you hate me, but I will keep it in the bottom of my heart and I can hurt with my words. I will always say what I think, my mouth has no filter

If i've been watching you for a while, maybe I may smile at you out of courtesy, but if I don't like you, I won't look at you. I will give short answers such as "yes" "no", "you don't care" (I can't say in the case of DD, but he is also curt when he doesn't want to talk about something, besides his work environment doesn't always allow him to be honest with the things he wants to say, although "No sense" says a lot, doesn't it?)

My face is an open book and my way of being too, if I'm jealous, if I'm angry, if I'm happy, it's going to show on my face. DD is the same, he can't hide it, it's obvious and that's funny.

The case is also that if you don't like me, then you are wrong, because I didn't do anything wrong, if you don't like my personality or my way of being the problem is yours and I will walk away so that I don't have to see you and that you don't look at me, I don't want to suffer discomfort.

But, once I get warm with that one person, I'm not going to leave her/im, I'll smile at him/er and make him/er as happy as possible, I'll defend you and be selfish (especially if I like that person 😂😂. DD seems to be like that too, when he warms up, he is kind and sweet, he gives you his attention and smiles.) But, if I do something wrong, I will apologize and leave you, if you do something I will forgive you, but it will never be the same. For people like DD and me it is somewhat difficult to warm up to people, we are cold on the outside, but warm on the inside and we act for instinct.

I may not know much about DD, only his GG knows that, but there are things I see that I can say that we are alike.

Long, but I wanted to say it. 😂😂😂

[leossmoonn]

omg bae ship me w someone!! i rlly hope u know enough about me but just in case u don’t i use she/her/hers pronouns and i’m bi so u can ship me w any gender! also do it for any fandom i wanna see what u come up w LOL LOVE YOU <3

hehe alrighty

male mcu ship - peter parker

i swear i didnt ship u w peter just bc of your pfp pick but when you sent me your info and i read youre allergic to cats i was like “yes this is peter’s gf”. also i see you and peter as very alike ppl so… OKAY anyways so youll def met in school duh. it was the first day of the senior year in physics. you outsmarted him and he was like 🤨🤨 but also 😳😳 but he was confused and flustered. you ended up turning to him and giving him a smile which made his face turn pink. you giggled softly and turned back to pay attention the the class, completely obvious to the fact that peter stared at you the whole period.

after class he went up to you and was like “h-hey, y/n, right? well u-um i noticed that i was wrong in class, and i was just um, wondering if you could explain to me how i was wrong. because i was like, 200% sure i was right haha” and youre like “sure. meet me in the library during lunch” then you leave bc youre cool and peter is left there like 😮.

anyways so he meets you in the library and you basically give him a tutoring session and omg he literally cant stop staring at youu. he loves the way you smell and he thinks you look so pretty in your outfit hes like 😍😍😍. you notice this and smirk and say “you wanna go out w me and betty and ned tonight?” and hes like 😟 “wot” and youre like “it can be a double date. unless youre with someo-” and he’s like “NO NO IM NOT” and youre like “alright. heres my address. be there at 5, no later than that” you scribble your apartment number down and hand it to him before leaving. he picks up the paper and stares at it and just smiles bc tbh hes always thought you were pretty but was always too nervous to talk to you.

anyways so he tells aunt may when he gets home n shes so excited! her baby is going on his first date! she helps him prepare and she wishes him the best as he leaves to go to your apartment. he knocks on the door, holding a rose and waiting anxiously for you to open the door. you do a few moments later, your appearance making his heart explode. youre in this pretty blue dress thats super casual and has white flowers all over it. and hes like 😍😍😍😍 and you giggle and get flustered bc your long time crush is staring at you with his jaw wide. you then say hi, breaking him out of his daze and hes like “h-hi. you look stunning, u-uh i mean, pretty. stunning is too much. o-or maybe it’s not uh—” “thank you pete” you say. he smiles and holds out the rose, to which you awe at. you take him inside for a few moments, ned and betty already there. you grab your purse before you two head to downtown. 

the night is amazing. while ned and betty are cuddling up to each other, you and peter hang back and talk. you two learn a lot about each other and jump from topic to topic seamlessly. you end the night w ice cream and while ned takes betty home, peter takes you home too. you two end up sharing a cute goodbye kiss that leaves you two 😍😍😍 (lmfao this emoji is so famous). and you bid him goodbye and leave him again, flustered. next morning you two see each other in class and peter asks you to be his gf (aww) (you assume betty gave him the advice but actually he did it all on his own. he isnt totally clueless).

you two become gf and bf and are easily the most attractive and smartest couple in school. you two go on lots of dates and often match your outfits hehe. you two are often found in his apartment, cuddling while studying for upcoming tests. he eventually reveals his secret to you and youre a little pissed he didnt tell you before , but overall youre amazed and supportive. you do worry about him bur after missions he always comes back to you and its the best.

also just wanna add you two move in together after graduating and get a cat and you both just die while you cuddle it 🤩🤩

female hp ship - ginny weasley

kk so like you two were bffs before but then you two got drunk and ended up revealing your feelings to each other and shared a very drunk kiss before falling asleep on the couch in the common room 🌝. but the next morning you two are like 😳😳 “uh.. did we?” and you two are smiling like idiots and you kiss again out of excitement. 

you two kinda officiate everything that morning. you two decide to not be public yet bc its new to yall and you two dont want to ruin your friendship but literally a week in you both know youre soulmates and you end up giving your friends hints by beginning to hold hands n all that PDA. theyre very supportive of yall and youre soon the most cherished couple in school, but you two make sure to keep your relationship private.

you two go on lots of dates too. mostly to hogmeade, but in the summer you hang out at her house and end up going into town a lot. your outfits also match. ginny is usually seen wearing the jean and shirt version of y’all’s outfit but sometimes she’ll wear a dress to twin w you hehe.

you two are often seen cuddling, watching movies together and taking naps. you two are always in the kitchen, making a mess and having food fights. ginny also gets you into reading too. shes usually the one reading to you bc her voice is nice and soothing, and you almost always fall asleep to her reading. its so cute, molly ends up taking pictures with a camera arthur got her.

when you two are old enough, you move in together in a cute little apartment near the hospital where you intern at. ginny goes to train for quidditch and you two end up spending a lot of time apart, but you make sure to make the most of the time you have together <3 hehe

hope you liked it :) its really long lol 🌝 also this wasnt proofread i apologize if there are mistakes lol

[autisticangus]

anyway im so out of the loop on the mcelboys

i pretty much only keep semi-up to date with Sawbones at this point, not cuz i dont still LIKE everything else, just a lot has been goin on in my life

if anyone wants a long and rambly update on All Of The Bullshit im gonna stick a read more down here, asks are open and its cool to message me abt any of it if u want cuz i have some really nice and cool followers/mutuals here that make me comfy talkin abt that shit

as far as the future of this blog goes i wanna start using it more again! the mcelroys have gotten me out of some really dark places before so i hope having more connection to this community and the people here and their content again will help me like it has in the past! ill probs post more general mcelroy content here than previously rather than just taz btw i just gotta fuckin uhhhhh,,,, catch up on a bunch of shit again before this blog is even semi active lmaoo but im like alive and on tumblr regularly again!!

Wow u clicked on this and wanna hear me talk? Ur awesome and sweet, thanks for caring!

These past two years have been extraordinarily tough. This is gonna be a pretty long and detailed post that deals with the sensitive topics of emotional abuse, abusive relationships, and alcoholism. Please read on with caution.

Back in March of 2019, so this was about 3-4 months after i left tumblr, I got a new boyfriend and things started out really good, he was kind of a "bad boy" and it was fun at first. Im kind of a goody-goody so it was very interesting for me at first to be with someone so different who had such different life experiences than me. I liked hearing his stories of living in a traphouse, and running with gangs, and selling drugs, and knowing people who had killed people. I assumed a LOT of it was lies, obviously, who just brags about that shit u know? I just rolled with it, didnt take it seriously, and found the imagined scenarios interesting to listen to. So much of it was obviously played up to make him seem cooler, and I shouldve seen that as the red flag it was, and all my friends did but I didnt. 

He had a serious alcohol problem, I mean I had coffee in the morning and he had 2 four lokos before noon. it was bad. about 6 months into the relationship he decided i was cheating on him with my ex who i had recently reconnected with, we missed being friends and things were really going well talking and being friends again, he was really important to me! but my boyfriend saw this as yet another thing i was doing wrong. when he decided i was cheating, that become his focus of alcoholic rage. nearly every time he got drunk, which was several times a week, he would accuse me of things, he would yell and scream, he would call me horrible names and make me cry for literal hours, he never hit me but that shouldnt even matter, i was emotionally battered and mentally bruised and everything hurt. he gaslit me into believing i said and did things i never said or did, i admitted to things that were not real, and then i was yelled at for admitting them. i didnt know what to do.

he was threatening my ex too, he would get drunk and say he knew where he lived (he didnt) or he knew what car he drove (he didnt) and explained to me many times that although he had never killed someone, people had been killed before at his command. he said a bullet in the back of my ex’s brain was just a phone call and $500 away. somedays he would tell me he was just going to do it himself, with a hammer, or a kitchen knife, or whatever weapon he could get his hands on during his explanation of how he would do it. my only option was to agree, to say it didnt matter to me what happened to him, i had to pretend my on

/ly concern was him going to jail for the crime, if i showed any sign that i didn’t want my ex murdered, it clearly meant i was cheating on him. 

i pretended to block my ex on social media to get him off my back and it worked a little bit but he still brought it up. and even if he didnt directly mention him, he would always tell me when he was drunk that i was the cause of all his problems, i was why he was so self conscious, i was why he drank so much, i was why he had to work so hard, i was why every single issue he had was happening. logically i knew it was wrong, but i was so conditioned to it by then that i just went with it. i knew that agreeing and apologizing made the fighting end quicker.

things spiraled this past summer. his job needed us to relocate so we moved like 4 states away, away from all my family and friends, and lived in a tiny hotel room for a month. during this time, his drinking was somehow worse. he was drunk literally every night but he was passing out so we didnt fight and i was relieved. i was depressed being stuck in the hotel room all day alone, but thankful i wasnt being abused at least. then he started getting into drunken fistfights with his coworkers in the hotel parking lot. one day he came home just in time to find one of his drunk coworkers trying to break into the room with me there desperately trying to keep him out. i was terrified and wanted to go home but he convinced me to stay. a couple weeks after that we travelled for his work again several more states away. his drinking got a little bit better here, but i was so depressed and lonely, i was so isolated, he was all i saw day in and day out besides his coworkers and i was nervous around them. one day the guy who tried to break in on me, purposefully, while drunk, hit another coworkers car and totaled it and tried to run the guy over and i saw the whole thing. a week later my boyfriend was also fired because he got so drunk he passed out in the hotel parking lot and the company needed to save face with the hotel after the whole car incident. 

so we travelled back home, but not my home, to his where we lived isolated on a mountain with no phone signal or wifi. the house was old and not well kept from being empty for several years, half the appliances didnt work. i was more isolated than i have ever been in my life. for 4 months i stayed there and just dreaded him coming home because i knew he would be drunk again and he'd yell or accuse me of things or otherwise belittle me. it was horrible. my friends all said to leave and my parents said to leave but i was so brainwashed into thinking that if i was just a good little housewife and if i just stayed home and did the dishes and the laundry that he would be nicer but he still found things to point at and say i was cheating. he was also becoming really controlling about my food intake and weight and i already struggle with an eating disorder so that just made me feel even more like i had to stay, my brain felt like if i wasnt under his watchful eye id gain weight again, like somehow it was thanks to him i had lost weight and not my own choices.

one day last week i expressed to him wanting to leave, saying how unhappy i was, i told him how sad i felt and how i didnt think we were such a good match. he didnt take me seriously, so the next day when he got sloppy drunk before 5 pm i packed a small bag and went to my moms. i was just gonna stay for a night or two but he called and screamed at me for leaving without telling him, i told him he just didnt remember me telling him because he was so drunk, and he accused me of not caring about his feelings and made me sound like the bad guy for leaving without his permission. i told him it was just for a few days but the angrier he got the more i knew i was in the right and told him i was done. i told him we were breaking up and id come get my stuff soon.

i got my stuff while he was at work this past weekend and moved in with my best friend. im safe and happy now. things are looking so much better for me and im so thankful to my friends and family who supported me all the way to the end.

i just wanted to make this post because, i know its not mcelroy related, and a lot of ppl probably dont care for stuff like this on this kind of blog, but i think its important.

its important to friends and family of people in abusive relationships to be steady. dont give up your ground. even if the person keeps pushing back and wont leave the person, keep being there for them, it can take a long time, it took me almost 2 years to leave, it takes some people even longer, but just stay there for them and be there for them when they finally make that step. dont give up on them.

and to those who have been in these kinds of relationships, and especially those who are there right now: it is not your fault. it is so, so hard to leave, i know, but please try to find help and support and resources to do it. if all your friends dont like someone, theres a good reason for it. please dont fall into the trap of thinking your friends dont have the best intentions for you. there are so many things you may overlook in the moment that others can see from a mile away are horrible. especially if you have been abused in the past. its incredibly hard to tell what is a red flag when your gut instinct is that anything and everything is a red flag. surround yourself with people who you can trust and listen to them

and trust me, i know how hard it is when youre stuck in that spot of KNOWING you should go but fearing that first step away. its scary. its difficult. but it is worth it. find someone safe you can be with. and if you arent sure, find a reason to leave for just a few days, an excuse, anything. give yourself space from the abuser, tell yourself youre going back in a couple days, just get out from under the thumb long enough to clear your head and things will make more sense with the fog lifted.

when i first got in my car and put my kitten on my lap and told her we were going to my moms for a couple nights, i didnt know if that was the truth. i planned to come back and i knew i didnt want to. i only took enough stuff for a couple days. i couldnt imagine my life changing so drastically. where would i live? how would i make money? who take care of me? i had no clue about any of those things. but after a couple days away I realized i would take care of me. i remembered that i had worked jobs before i was with him, i could do it again. i remembered that i had options of where to live. all of those things were so clouded when i was with him, they felt like impossibilities. once i was away, even just for a short time, things were so much easier to parse.

and i know i had many privileges in this journey not everyone is afforded, and my heart goes out to those who read this and are in this situation and the options i had just arent accessible to you, i am so sorry, i wish i had something more to offer you but all i have is my story, and a wish that it gives you some hope at the very least, and a promise that if you need someone to talk to, im here, i will listen, and you will be heard and loved.

i just want everyone who reads to take something small but important away from it. love your friends, love yourself. please stay safe. please dont give up. remember love should not hurt.

[hickoryfarm]

i made my version of the 10% left AU bc im a sucker for storylines like that lol

i used 20 cats instead of 13 tho bc i felt weird abt the odd numbers

so thunderclan contains lionblaze, rosepetal, spiderleg, bumblestripe, amberkit, purdy, and mousefur

riverclan has troutstream, rushtail, pebblefoot, perchkit, havenkit, and lizardkit

shadowclan has olivenose, ferretclaw, grasskit, and whitewater

windclan has weaselfur, sedgewhisker, and webfoot

basically after the battle the last of the clans converge together to make a single clan so they can all protect eachother and try to start again. i think it may be called lakeclan or somethin just bc of the fact the lake is so important to them as a whole, but i havent rlly decided yet, i may think of a better name.

lionblaze gives up fighting entirely and becomes a medicine cat. he's guided by leafpool, squirrelflight, jayfeather and hollyleaf in starclan. they give him advice and try to teach him how to adjust to his new path and learn to help others by healing

rosepetal's calm and wise nature and her experience as an excellent warrior earns her the leadership position, and she becomes rosestar. sedgewhisker eventually becomes her deputy. rosestar also begins rebuilding her relationship with spiderleg bit by bit

spiderleg turns a new leaf. he works through his depression and grief by helping the others. he spends alot of time with mousefur and rosestar, and plans to mentor amberkit when shes apprentice-aged. he becomes a more well-rounded cat as a whole and works hard to better himself and the connections he has left

bumblestripe is really depressed for a while. he misses dovewing alot and keeps himself in a cycle of "what-ifs". he and rosestar get close, as theyve always been friends before, and she helps him work thru some of his issues. theyre pretty close

all of the elders become pretty good friends. purdy and webfoot grow close since they both love storytelling. purdy becomes the grandpa of the clan and keeps everyone positive and optimistic. he spends a ton of time with the kits too. mousefur is really distraught for a long time, but eases into her new friend group. she and whitewater get along pretty well after a while.

troustream and rushtail are really close. troutstream is doing what she can to adjust to the change, but still spends alot of time at the lake alone to take a breather. rushtail tries to help her, but hes mourning pretty heavily over hollowflight and is having a hard time moving on. pebblefoot wants to care for them both, but rushtail is pushing him to retire due to how bad his injuries from the battle are. the riverclan cats arent used to being away from the river, but are trying to make due as the clan tries to find an appropriate place to settle permanently so everyone is comfortable.

olivenose has been spending time in the nursery. shes not a queen, but watching the kittens has made her feel alot better about the future of the clan. sedgewhisker helps her, and so do the elders and lionblaze. olivenose is pretty anxious and tends to get nervous, but has been trying to work through her anxiety with ferretclaw's help. ferretclaw has been nervous and suspicious as well, and venting to eachother has helped them come to terms with the aftermath feelings of the battle.

weaselfur has been unusually quiet. he likes spending time with the elders, and sedgewhisker helps him think of windclan's better days. sedgewhisker hasn't been the same since losing her mate and daughters, but has taken on as much responsibility as she can handle. she helps lipnblaze gather herbs and was surprised when rosestar picked her as deputy, for her reasonable nature and dedication to moving forward.

amberkit has been having a hard time without her parents, but her new nursery mates help her feel more normal. grasskit clings to her often, and theyre close friends. the triplets from riverclan wreak the most havoc and are incredibly protective of eachother, and they give olivenose a run for her money. the clan is lucky to have so many kittens, because kittens mean a better future for the clan.

but yeah i rlly like the concept of the AU! and i had a ton of fun thinking this thru and i wanna write more and devleop more! if i write any fics ill link yall to them! its a cool idea and i hope to see more ppl do their own versions too

[sosa-sketch]

Fright or Flight: Chapter 2

Parings: Prinxiety // Logicality // Platonic LAMP

Story Summary: Virgil and Patton investigate the New Prince Castle, when a brutal accident kills Patton. Patton wakes as a ghost and meets friendly ghoul Roman, who has been haunting the castle for 20 years. Virgil is determined to bring Patton back to life and brings Logan, the ghost expert, to help him out. Time is quickly running out, and the four must work together to undo death. If only it was as simple as Logan made it sound.

Unknown to them, a secret entity in the castle does not plan on letting them succeed.

Previous Chapter   Next Chapter 

When Patton first met Virgil, his last intention was to become friends with him. Virgil had built up a notorious reputation over the first few months of school, and his grades did nothing to disprove his status. Patton wasn’t the type to judge a person’s character based on rumors nor looks. No one was a higher believer in the benefit of doubt than Patton! However, Virgil’s first impression did not help his case.

Virgil transferred into Patton’s English class the second semester due to a schedule change. When the teacher stated a new team project was to be completed, Patton did not shy away from offering to be Virgil’s partner. He understood how difficult it could be being the new kid in a class full of friends and cliques.

The project was hefty, an collection of novel analyzing, essays, vocabulary, and journal entries. Patton was not looking forward to the Shakespearean project-Shakespeare’s language was alien to him. It occurred to Patton that pairing up with the soon-to-be-dropout may not have been his best idea. Nonetheless, Patton refused to be jaded.

The first day of the project, Virgil refused to touch the work.

“There’s no way I’m touching this project.” Virgil sneered. “Especially about Shakespeare.”

“Huh?” Patton had not fully processed Virgil’s words. “Is it because you don’t understand it?”

“Sure.”

“Neither can I! I guess Shakespeare really has our brains shaken up! Maybe we can ask the teacher to go over it for us?”

The teen huffed and shook his head. Virgil laid his head on the wooden desk and his eyes slipped closed. He napped for the rest of the period.

His behavior continued for weeks. Patton had tried everything in his power to get Virgil to help him out. Patton’s seemingly endless supply of compliments and encouraging gestures served no help.

Patton’s mind had conjured countless excuses for Virgil since Virgil himself refused to give one. At the beginning the excuses had seemed feasible. Lack of sleep? Family issues? However, by week three, Patton was already scraping the bottom of the barrel, trying to justify Virgil’s dismissive attitude with clones and possible mind control. Virgil was no closer to lifting up a pencil, there were ten days left of the project, and Patton still understood little to nothing about Shakespeare. Patton was flying solo and time was ticking.

The final week before the project was due, Patton caught the flu.

Patton would chalk up the flu to the top three sucky sicknesses of his lifetime. His fever was raging, his skin drowning in sweat while the insides of him iced over. Patton couldn’t tell when being awake ended and when sleep began. The only alarm in Patton’s body was the churning in his gut that rushed him to the toilet.

Understandably, the project was the last thing on his mind.

Patton would not remember his Shakespeare mission until the Sunday before it was due, when he was shaking off the final remnants of the flu. The realization hit him like a train, but by the time he went flying off his bed and hurriedly logging on to his computer to check the time, Patton knew it was hopeless. There was no way he could get the project done in a few hours and counting. Not when all his energy was going into fighting of sneezes and headaches.

Patton was dejectedly scrolling through his email filled with newsletters from adoption sites and animal protection agencies when a subject line caught his eye: “English Project.” Linked to the email were word documents and an audio file. Perplexedly, Patton opened the email.

To: patpetspups@gmail.com

From: killjoy_2001@icloud.com

Subject: English Project

Patton,

so apparently you’ve been sick. class is way more quiet without you their, which is wierd.

i think i did everything you hadn’t done. it’s gonna be really mispelled and confusing and shit. sorry. i’m not the best with righting. feel free to fix anything.

get well soon.

-V

p.s. sorry for acting like a jerk. i owe you a explanation monday.

Patton hugged his computer screen and laugh with relief. He had no idea why Virgil was so nervous. His ideas were brilliant. A week later, Patton would see an A in his gradebook for the Shakespeare project.

There was a reason why Patton never lost faith in people.

True to his word, the next week Virgil explained his mistreatment to Patton. Virgil struggled with dyslexia. While he was getting tutoring in overcoming his learning disability, Virgil’s writing made him incredibly insecure. His old teacher always let him work individually, but the new teacher wasn’t having it. Before class, the teacher pulled him aside and told Virgil he was no different from any other student and would have to work with a partner. Virgil, determined to spite the teacher and anxious to seem like an “idiot” in front of Patton, would pretend to sleep the whole period.

“All your writing took was a quick grammar fix. The ideas were so good! I’m not just saying that to say that, they actually were! I could never think of something like that.” Patton reassured enthusiastically.

Virgil flushed a bright red. “I didn’t do much. Shakespeare is a lot easier to understand with audio.”

Patton listened to the audiobook of Macbeth that night. Virgil clearly wasn’t giving himself enough credit.

Virgil and Patton quickly grew close once the project was done. Virgil was still quiet, snappy, moody, and detrimentally insecure, but he began to open up more as the months went on. By senior year, Patton and Virgil was joined at the hip. Two peas in a pod.

Virgil had grown a lot since freshman year.

Being joined at the hip with Virgil meant that Patton got to understand Virgil by the simplest change in body language or expression. It also meant that Patton became aquatinted with anyone close to Virgil.

Patton already had a bad feeling while Virgil’s tone had shifted on the phone the night they were chatting about yearbook quotes. Remy sending Patton a text only confirmed the ball of dread in his stomach.

Rem: pat can we talk ?

Patton: You don’t even have to ask! Everything ok?

Rem: it’s about v

Rem: have you guys talked recently ? out of school

Patton: We talked last weekend. Over the phone. Why? Is Virgil fine??

Rem: idk. he came over to my house a couple nights ago at like 5 am. talked about some ghost shit.

Patton: He woke you up to talk about ghosts??(language!)

Rem: looking for affirmation that he wasn’t some obsessed ghost freak. i told him nah

Rem: but tbh he kinda is obsessed

Patton: He is passionate about his ghosts! But that’s not a bad thing.

Rem: v strongly disagrees. the whole thing about the yearbook and ghost quotes really messed with his head

Patton: I didn’t mean anything bad by it! It was just an idea! I promise! I’ll apologize to him!!!

Rem: wait no thats not what im saying. no one blames u

Rem: is he doing any ghost stuff anytime soon

Patton: Yep. He’s going to visit a castle!

Patton: Is that bad?

Rem: don’t you remember last time v became paranoid abt something? he pulled some real stupid stuff just to prove ppl wrong

Patton: Yeah. I know.

Patton: Gosh now I’m worried :(

Rem: i just dont want him doing anything he’ll regret on the trip. can u just…idk watch out for him pls ? ik v can take care of himself. but sometimes he gets into this headspace that’s self-destructive

Rem: tbh i dont like his ghost stuff as it is. i dont need him doing something dumb either

Patton: I understand Rem. That’s really sweet of you <3 <3

Patton: I’ll look out for him! I promise!!!! :-) :-)

Rem: ty. dont tell v abt this convo tho

Despite feeling uneasy about it, Patton understood Remy’s request to keep silent. Telling Virgil about their conversation would only push Virgil away and make him defensive. It’d be impossible to look out for him.

Virgil had already given Patton a way in. Patton had to talk to Logan for Virgil and get any supplies he might need. Patton loved visiting Logan in and of itself. Maybe Logan could help him out.

Logan’s business was located near small shops clustered along the beach. It was a hotspot for tourists, where knickknacks and souvenirs were sold and expensive attractions were advertised. Patton walked along here with Virgil sometimes, stopping at the arcade or mirror maze. Patton had met some of the most interesting people in the small touristy town.

Among the attractions was a dark blue shingled building with a pointy-roofed top. Painted letters on a wooden board spelt out “Afterlife Exposed.” Patton stepped through the door and a bell gently ringed, signaling his arrival.

At the sound of the bell, a tall, dark-haired man turned around. His navy suit blended in with the darkness of the shop. The man’s lean body was captivated beautifully in the suit. Patton quickly averted his eyes, blushing furiously.

“I have been expecting you-oh. Greetings, Patton. What a surprise.”

“Hi Logan!” Patton waved enthusiastically. “Who were you expecting?”

“No one. It’s a new rule Father has implemented. I must say it to every customer to ‘set the mood,’ as he calls it.” Logan dragged his hand over his face exasperatedly. “I find it quite ridiculous. But business shall be business.”

Logan’s father technically owned Afterlife Exposed. But he was always hidden in the back, gathering supplies or experimenting. Logan was currently studying entrepreneurship in college in order to take over the family business someday.

“How may I help you today, Patton?” Logan inquired, stepping around the counter to stand in front of him. He was even taller up close.

Patton filled Logan in about the New Prince Castle family murder and Virgil’s plan to investigate the castle for one of his ghost routines. Logan nodded politely the whole way through.

“I see. What an intriguing case. What exactly does he need from me?”

Patton shrugged cluelessly. “Anything you think might help, I guess.”

“What’s his budget?”

“A coffee and cake pop from Starbucks, if he uses his gift card.”

Logan rolled his eyes. “And he sent you to purchase something from here? Why, he couldn’t even afford a keychain.”

“Come on, Logan! He’s one of your most loyal customers and between us, he’s going through a rough patch. Can’t you help him out? Please?”

Logan massaged his temples and sighed. “Patton, it’s just not something the business can afford to do right now. My Father and I have been dealing with a sort of rough patch as well. You and Virgil have my sincerest apologies-truly, you do.”

Patton nodded dejectedly, “I understand.” Spotting Logan’s hesitant expression and tense form, he rested a hand on Logan’s shoulder and grinned. “Really, I do. I don’t blame you.”

Logan gave a small, tight-lipped smile in return. Gently shaking Patton’s hand off his shoulder, he clasped his hands together tightly. “Well, is there anything else I can do for you?”

“I’m not too sure.” Patton pursed his lips in thought. “Well, actually. I was wondering if you could tell me the dos and don’ts of ghost hunting. The yays and nays. The cats and dogs-actually no scratch that, both of those would be a yay.”

“With all due respect, Patton, I think Virgil has got that covered.” Logan reassured. “He must have asked me a dozen times prior to his first investigation.”

“Oh yeah, I know. It’s for me.” Patton corrected.

Logan raised an eyebrow in perplexion. Patton had never shown an interest in ghost hunting when Virgil wasn’t to be found.

Patton thought quickly. “I just want to understand more. For when I talk to Virgil. Sometimes I really don’t get half the explanations coming from the kiddo’s mouth.” It wasn’t a lie. “Just…how do you deal with ghosts?

“I see.” Logan clicked his tongue. “I’m sure Virgil could explain it to you more in depth. But, if you’re ever in doubt, chalk it up to one thing: respect. Is what you’re doing respecting the afterlife and their home? Are you portraying common courtesy? Treat them with the same respect as the living, if not more. There are exceptions, as with anything, but for the most part, that should keep you out of trouble with spirits.”

“Respect.” Patton repeated.

“You have strong morals, Patton. If you’re concerned about involvement with the afterlife due to your closeness with Virgil, I would not worry. Lack of respect is the last of your weaknesses.”

Logan pulled out his phone from the back of his pocket. “I apologize, I must return to my work. However, if you or Virgil have any more questions, feel free to give me a call.”

Patton gushed and thanked Logan, jotting down his number. Logan flushed a gentle red and held out his hand for a handshake.

“Pleasure doing business with you, Patton.”

Patton swatted Logan’s hand away and brought him in for a hug. “Thank you, Logan.”

Logan awkwardly pat Patton on the back before ungracefully untangling himself from the embrace. “I was only doing my job. Now, I understand it’s none of my business, but I recommend getting some rest. You look exhausted.”

“High school has permanently carved bags under my eyes.” Patton shook his head defeatedly.

Logan gave an amused smirk. “You sounded like Virgil.”

Patton beamed. “Like father, like son!”

Just as Patton was about to turn around to leave the store, something in the corner of the room glistened, catching his eye. “Hey Logan? Just one more thing?”

Logan hummed at him, encouraging Patton to continue.

He pointed to the object at the corner of the room. “How much can I get that for?”

 “Walkie-talkies. I sent you to Logan Berry, one of the smartest, most knowledgeable people about the afterlife in this town, and you come back with a Ghost Buster walkie-talkie.” Virgil grunted, dangling the toy by its antennae.

“You can have the Casper the Ghost one instead.”

“What? No! Ghost Busters is better, anyway.” Virgil groaned. “That’s not the point. How about advice? Did Logan say anything?”

“Just to respect the ghosts. Have common courtesy. Which you better be doing anyway, even without Logan telling you to do so.”

Virgil threw his hands up in exasperation and fell down into his sofa as the cushions engulfed the skinny man. “Obviously I respect them! The last thing I need is coming home possessed and cursed! He knows I know that. That’s really all he said?”

“Besides giving us his number.” Patton confirmed. “Which I already gave you.”

Virgil grumbled. “Whatever. One day I’ll get enough money to- wait. The walkie-talkies. There’s no way you could have bought them with my money, I would not have had enough. Please don’t tell me…”

Virgil got a glance of Patton’s sheepish look and groaned. “Patton, we have a rule! No buying each other anything!” He buried his head in his hands. “I can’t pay you back. You know that.”

“Hey…” Patton took a seat next to Virgil and laid a comforting hand on his knee. “It’s okay. They weren’t expensive. You don’t have to pay me back.”

Virgil looked at Patton in between his fingers. His voice was muffled against his palms. “You know how I feel about that, Pat.”

“Virgil, come on.” Patton pleaded.

Virgil shook his head. “Thank you. But, you need to return them.”

Guilty silence settled among the two, but neither made a move to leave. Both were lost in their own worlds when an idea struck Patton.

He nudged Virgil. “I know a way for you to pay me back without money.” At Virgil’s unimpressed look, he protested, “Seriously! It would mean a lot more to me than whatever these walkie-talkies cost.”

“Yea?” Virgil lifted his head from his hands. “What is it?”

Patton stared at Virgil’s stormy eyes as his heart pounded. In all honesty, this was the last thing Patton wanted to do. He was terrified. But, he thought back to the conversation he had with Remy, and the last time Virgil did something senseless unsupervised due to paranoia. “I want to go ghost hunting with you. At the New Prince Castle.”

Virgil’s jaw dropped. His eyes darted around Patton’s face before he shook his head and gave a weak chuckle. “Sure, Pat. Whatever you say.”

“No, I’m serious!” Patton insisted. “I’ll respect the ghosts and do whatever you tell me to do!”

Virgil was dismissing Patton before he could finish his sentence. “No, no, no. You hate ghost stories, Pat! Especially ones that are spooky and gruesome. You’d hate ghost-hutning. It’s dark and there’s lots of weird noises and tons of spiders. No way. I’m not adding more guilt to my conscience.”

Virgil made a move to get up from the sofa, but Patton refused to let the conversation drop. He grabbed Virgil’s hand and pulled him back to the seat. Virgil landed with a clumsy thump.  

“Kiddo, I know I hate all those things. I’m sure I’ll be scared. But, you’ll be there too! I love you more than I hate all those things combined.”

“Patton, we can do something else together. Go to the movies. Or bowling. Normal teen stuff.” Virgil reasoned.

Patton retorted, “But ghost hunting is important to you.”

“It’s not that important. It’s a simple hobby. I don’t care that much about it.” Virgil cut off.

“I know, I know!” Patton quickly backtracked. “What I meant was that ghost-hunting has been a cool way for us to bond. It intrigues you-a perfectly normal amount-and I like seeing you happy! Just like you go walking with me along the shops by the beach even though it’s super crowded and you hate it.”

“Patton, what’s your point?” Virgil grilled.

“My point is I want to try this thing that you enjoy with you. Just like you try things for me. It’s senior year, Virgil. No one hates thinking about it more than me, but we don’t know what things are going to be like after high school. I want to find a husband, start a family. Maybe study veterinary science. You could have a publisher for your writing, become a famous author, and move. I want to do this with you. I want to get over my fear.”

Patton stared at Virgil hopefully and held out his hand. “What do you say? One more big adventure for the dynamic duo?”

Virgil stared at Patton, looked down and roughly shook his head, froze, then stared at Patton once more. Virgil’s foot rapidly tapped against the floor, creating a dizzy, distracting melody. Finally, Virgil pulled his hair and glared at Patton. “You’ll be careful?”

Patton nodded eagerly.

“And you’ll stick with me no matter what? At all times? I want you in my sight.”

Virgil dramatically groaned, closing his eyes and throwing his head back. “I guess you can come.”

Patton shot up from his seat, whooping with joy and hopping around the sofa. “Thank you, Virgil! Thank you! We’re going to have such a great time!”

Virgil peeked one eye open and gave a soft grin. “Yeah, I guess we are. You’re sure you wanna do this?”

“Never been more sure of anything in my life besides my love for you and cats! I pinkie swear it.”

Patton and Virgil intertwined pinkies before Patton winked and let go, embracing Virgil.

“Let your moms know you’re going to be gone for the weekend.” Virgil smirked. “We have a haunted castle to explore.”

[namuneulbo]

week seven

the week of the worst mysme character (i said what i said). well, actually rikas worse. idk i just dont like seven. if any of them were real ppl though i wouldnt like any of them lol maybe yoosung? hes nice.

once again, monday was uneventful. i havent had volleyball practice in a while bc first we had a break from them then stricter restrictions and then the coach got covid. i watched haikyuu while i ate dinner (i usually do that on mondays bc haikyuu really hypes me up for practice lol). i had instant pasta for dinner, like usual... i should really learn how to cook.

tuesday! i had my first drumming lesson and i had the last jazz band rehearsal before the tiny concert. well just be playing in front of other classes so im not nervous at all. the drumming lesson was alright. the teacher was nice and quite funny so i think itll be okay to have drumming lessons for the rest of the semester. he reminded me of one of the other teachers since he too wore all black clothing and a snapback. i prefer the drumming teacher though bc hes not passive-aggressive like the other :) i came late to the lesson though bc he was drumming while waiting for me and i was too shy to just walk in and say hi...

i had a twenty one pilots band practice as the last class of the day and it was alright. the drummer couldnt come due to personal reasons and i forgot to reply to him and now i feel really bad that i couldnt at least give him some support TT

i had a mcdonalds job interview on wednesday and i got the job at the spot! i knew i would though *flips hair* i worked there last summer so i was quite sure id get it. i havent signed anything yet though just incase i do get a job somewhere better but for now mcdonalds seems the most likely. its a good workplace, at least after i got a schedule that worked for me. last summer my schedule was the cause of my first breakdown ever. i couldnt stop crying no matter how hard i tried. it felt so nice though and it was so needed after bottling it all up. i was crying before i went to work and i couldnt even stop when my mom came home for lunch which is so unlike me bc i usually cant cry around others. then i cried the entire way to work and went sobbing into the office and told them i wouldnt be able to work that day (i had gone in hopes of feeling better on the way there) and then even after that i sobbed the entire way home and randomly cried at times for the next few hours. it was so weird but oh my god i felt so good afterwards. cant wait for it to happen again in 7 years.

for context, i dont bottle up my feelings willingly, i just straight up dont cry. once i reached the age where i stopped ‘child crying’ i hadnt had a good cry until that day. it may sound odd but one of my goals is to someday be able to cry in someones arms. i want to show emotions!!!!!

nothing special happened on thursday.

friday !!!!!! i had math three hours straight and usually id hate it but i like my teacher (shes a milf) and the concepts were at that level where its almost enjoyable. im surprised i managed to focus for that long though (minus the short bathroom break i had). she had the olympics on on the monitor (i cant think of the actual word ??). im sad i missed figure skating though, its fun to watch and <yuzuru hanyu3

after school i had to study for the maths test coming up and also do finnish hw.

in the evening my dad picked me up to drop me off at ts place. we were going to sleep at ms place but m wouldnt be home at the time my dad had to leave so i had to stop by ts place for about an hour before meeting up w m and i. m drove us to the grocery store where we got some snacks and then we went to their place. she cut my hair and now i finally have the cut ive wanted for ages. i dont know the proper name but its like a lumine/xiao/venti haircut. i love it sm. it took like three hours though omg we were all so tired and we had originally planned on switching outfits w each other and like styling each other but by the time m finished cutting my hair we all just agreed on watching a movie and going to bed. we watched the second madagascar movie. i havent seen the first one but it was fun. they all said the giraffe was my type and now i cant stop thinking about it. hes not btw but i see where theyre coming from lol we couldnt even finish it before everyone wanted to sleep.

i woke up quite a lot like i usually do at sleepovers but the mattress was so comfy omfg. we all collectively woke up by ms dog running around and playing w us. shes so cute TT we watched the rest of the movie in the morning. i had to leave early since my dad was coming to pick me up and he had to leave early from his girlfs place since she had school.

i got home at around 11. the day went by surprisingly fast and it took a long time to get ready since i had to style my hair and do my makeup. i met up w l and her ‘friend’ o in the evening to have a jam sesh at my school. l stopped by my house a bit earlier and we talked for a bit before leaving together to go meet up w o. l likes o so it was quite fun to meet her and she was way taller than i expected. idk why i assumed she was short but she was taller than me lol not that im that tall. im like,, 167/168 i dont remember but its one of the two.

anyways we played imagine by john lennon, treasure by bruno mars, valerie by amy winehouse, astronomy by conan gray, the cut that always bleeds by conan gray, golden by harry styles, somebody that i used to know by gotye and i think thats it? we left at midnight and struggled a bit to get out of school property since all gates were locked apart from one. i started getting nervous for a second when we had tried three exits and all of them were locked but the fourth one was open. my old friends e and t came to pick up o and we exchanged hellos. i miss them but theyre also friends w a racist pos sooooo..

todays sunday and i havent done anything at all really. i got ready and did my makeup and omg i look hot asf rn. i ate the leftover kokosbollsdeg (directly translates into coconut ball dough) from yesterday that i made in distress before l arrived bc i wanted to make it in time so it could stay in the fridge during our jam sesh and i could eat it by the time i came home.

sotw: lucifer - arcadia