#SIMON SWEEP

[spunkfunkyzzz]

POST THIS CAT

[orangeshortstuff]

i'm ride or die for my man simon

ROUND ONE

Propaganda

Simon Petrikov: How many universes can one man almost get wiped out by being sad?

Ballister Blackheart: Just look at him. He looks SO sad all the time. He was just a guy hiding in a shack after he was wrongfully accused of assassinating the Queen until Nimona came along. No friends whatsoever until Nimona came along. He misses his boyfriend because he's a knight and he's worried he believes he actually committed the crime. He deserves better

[skyrigel]

Omg stawp🤧I’m glad they made you happy 🥹💖 I need sweetheart simon rn😩🌸

“Siiiiiiii-monnnnnn! I am tireeddddd” You slurred and giggled at how horrible it sounded, Simon just rolled his eyes fondly before grabbing your purse and standing up.

“tis’ past Mrs. Riley's bedtime.” He said smugly, snatching away the drink you almost got your hands on, Gaz drank it instead.

“Sleep well Mrs.Riley !” Soap raised his glass, wiggling his eyebrows the way Ghost hated.

“Tread carefully, he's not liking it.” Pince admitted, clapping an arm around Soap, watching dizzily at the whole affair.

“But you just started !”

Simon pulled you closer to him.

“She has work tommorow and will wake up all grumpy and moody, while I love her—”

“There are children here.” Soap stated, smirking at Pince who flashed him the bird.

“—like that but she's not gonna like being mean at her job, my ray of sunshine and I love meanie her—”

“You guys should really get a room.” Gaz dodged the glare Simon shooted.

“fuck it, let's go love.”

Ignoring them all, while you waved sloppily at them, like there would be no tommorow and John equally matching your freak.

Simon practically carried you out of the bar, one hand holding your high heels and sling bag while other wrapped around your waist.

“Baby, can we dance ?” You wiggled out and would have smashed your head if it weren't Simon who held you against him.

“Aren't you tired cupcake ?” He suggested, opening the car door and tossing in your belongings before clasping both of your hands in his veing big ones.

“Yeah. Right.” You blinked, then beamed, “But let's dance !” you added pulling him.

Simon shrugged, watching you with his fond head tilt, the one he had only for you.

“If you dance with me —” You lowered your voice to a whisper, cupping his face, “—I'll marry you.”

Simon's lips quirked, his lower voice tone was rapsier and more sexy, “Would ave’ take ya’ offer but am already married.”

He flashed his wedding band to you, taking in the frown you immediately descended in.

You blinked more and then looked at your hand, cupping his rough face.

“Same same.” You murmured, His cheeks flushed, nodding along, “samesame” He chimed, then.

“What a coincidence.” Simon blushed.

“Dance with me tonight.” You pouted, staring up from your mascara stained lashes.

“Wouldn’t ya’ husband mind ?”

“Wouldn’t my husband mind ?” You repeated, drunkish and everything mingled, like a spectrum, high and low all along.

“I don't think so.” He grinned, taking your fingers and bringing them on top of your head, twirling you once.

“Your wifey lovely ?” You asked, feeling giddy by the second twirl.

“Very.” Simon smiled, kissing your forehead.

Masterlist

[gomzdrawfr]

"Don't cry."

Simon said this whenever he knew you were about to cry, eyes glossy and watery, lips trembling.

trigger warnings: angst, childhood abuse (referenced + mentioned), canon-typical violence (referenced)

notes: this is an x reader fic, also apologies for the grammar and errors if any

read more to continue this short drabble

“Don’t cry.”

His voice was hollow, rough, forced out before the words had a chance to settle.

Simon said this whenever he knew you were about to cry, eyes glossy and watery, lips trembling.

It wasn’t gentle, nor a plea. It wasn’t meant for comfort or to keep you from falling apart. It was rough, low, and scratched at your ears in a way that made it hard to bear.

It felt more like an order, one you weren’t sure was meant for you or for himself.

“Just… don’t.” He repeated, the words more for himself than for you. Something swirled in his eyes behind the mask, a faint glint catching the light, like shattered glass.

“Simon,” you whispered, voice cracking, but he cut you off with a sharp edge, ending the conversation before it even began.

You thought it was because of the life he led—the danger and discipline that flowed through his blood. You thought he was telling you not to cry because he needed you to be strong. After all, he was a soldier—a man who had seen more violence, death, and despair than you could ever imagine. You assumed he couldn’t stand to see weakness, the vulnerability that came with it.

But there was more.

There was always more with him.

You didn’t know what those words really meant to him, how deep they ran, how they had been carved into his very bones, how they play on repeat in his head like a broken cassette tape on those colder nights.

You didn’t know that those two words were all he had ever heard growing up, the only comfort he could muster when his mum sobbed after another bad night, when Tommy curled up in the corner of the kitchen, scared and bruised, whispering into the dark.

Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry.

He had felt helpless as a boy, kneeling before his family, wanting more than anything to do something—anything—but lacking the strength or power to act. He couldn’t make the pain go away. He couldn’t make the tears disappear.

Hearing those heart-wrenching sobs, those sniffles, those whimpers—it made him feel like that little boy again: lost, powerless, useless.

But the tears always came, and they never fixed anything. Crying didn’t make the bruises disappear. It didn’t quiet the screams. It didn’t make the shouting stop. All it did was twist his stomach inside out, wring his heart until he didn’t even recognize it anymore, and made his breathing all the more suffocating, like he was drowning in someone else’s grief.

It made him feel small.

Seeing those same tears in your eyes brought him back to that place. And he didn’t know how to deal with it. How to make it better.

He hated it. He hated feeling like that small boy again, hopeless, like he was failing all over.

Because Simon loves you, he truly does, more than himself, and yet he can’t bring himself to face you in these moments. 

Turning his back away from you, his head dipped lower, as if he were willing himself out of the memory that bubbled up, out of the pain that no amount of time or distance could dull.

Tears didn’t fix the past. They didn’t heal the scars that had been left on his soul.

“Simon-”

“Don’t cry… please.”

When he turned away, when he avoided your tears, when he grew distant whenever you broke down in front of him—it wasn’t because he didn’t care.

He just didn’t know how to handle it.

[gentleaffectionss]

Sometimes in life, you need crappy Dream Bard animations to help deal with things

Which Is why I wasted 3 hours of possible sleeping to do this! Might just be a dreambard sweep for the like. 3 dream bard fans.

(I'm also never planing to do an animation again cause what the freak !!!!)

[cyclopsboxhead]

Birds of Prey issue 75 has two stories and one of them has to play damage control both literally for the loss of the Clocktower but also figuratively for why the hell would Barbara Gordon do that? The answer is whoever was writing Batman at the time had her do it while Batman was fighting Black Mask in the Clock Tower. I can only imagine how infuriating the decision was, and judging by Simone's writing in this issue I'm almost certain it was made without consulting her at all. The first three pages are wordless, Oracle, Black Canary, and Huntress all have nothing to say as they watch in silent vigil the remains of the Clock Tower being contained by the Fire Department. Then the obligatory page where Simone has to explain why the character she's been writing made such a rash, out of character decision: because she was worried about Bruce.

If it makes you upset that's cause it was meant to. It's purposefully falling into the trope of a woman character making a sacrifice to aid the leading man. Not just that, but Simone takes it a step further by having Barbara make herself the damsel in distress. It reads as "oh this is what you meant by making the character I've been writing do that. So I'm just going to say that out loud so it's clear to everyone else."

Then after the obligatory damage control flashback we get the Birds of Prey all together, Huntress and Black Canary are comforting their leader, teammate, and friend. Here's where Simone twists the knife a bit more, having Barbara talk about the things we don't see when things like this happen in comics. What the characters really lose when they make sacrifices like this: old costumes, family photos, a place to sleep. Memories that are now without their talismans for recall. Now these exist only in the mind and in the past.

And then one more page of group healing and it's back to work. Simone doesn't waste time or pages cleaning up the mess another writer made with her character. She uses exactly as much as she needs while also making those moments linger. She wants you to know how this makes her characters, and herself feel, but she isn't going to give the other writer the satisfaction of making the entire story a reaction issue.

It's really a testament to how much Gail Simone cares about the agency of women both on and off the panel.

[cabeswaterdrowned]

@thechosenthree @antlerslayer @whodoesnataliehave

[d1gnan]

half of this website is awesome and half of this website is like deeply lame any time i see a music poll viewing the most commonly chosen result is like getting a bucket of ice dumped on my head

[spunkfunkyzzz]

TRANSMASC SIMON FOR THE WIN!!

[theodoraflowerday]

you know what gets me tho

I think simon's face (and how much he was crying - like, joyfully) is hitting me hard because of how incredibly romantic the gesture is? like yeah, obviously wille is free and simon wants him to be happy and wille didn't do it for simon, really

but in the barest sense of it, this is simon's love going to him romcom style (like seriously my man you own a phone you didn't have to run after the car) to declare to him that he toppled the swedish government, not for him, really, but it does mean they can be together now, so it was a little bit for him

like for simon who's always giving giving giving and usually not getting anything back, the absolute romance of this gesture had to have sucker punched him, right? like that's some fairytale shit. I know simon was also deeply moved by the romance of it all.

[erikahenningsen]

Simone Biles (most all-time)

[mcxcuseme13]

You know your teams good when international government workers are boycotting

[nofuckingbody]

simone biles wont miss the chance of her last gold being at usa man

[ub-sessed]

If I had the time and the energy I would run a series of polls comparing different recordings of jazz standards.

[rathologic]

I was wondering if katerina's name came up in PCHD dialogue any less than other characters' & based on some really rough approximations, that was completely wrong... not only is her name said 206 times throughout the game, but it's the fourth most often spoken NPC name (after Rubin: 292x, Maria: 305x, and Simon with an astounding 553x)