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wew2sab · 1 year ago

Text

i cant stop crying

That Day (part 1) [The Spot x Reader]

the idea for this fic was inspired by @trenchcoatbees :)

“Alchemax accident ends in loss and destruction.”

The same dream you’ve had for months plays out in front of you again.

“John? Johnathan!”

You run through the darkness of the rubble, searching for the one person you called your friend. If you had just been there that day, maybe things would have been different.

“Johnathan!”

You sob as your legs start to feel heavy and you’re unable to run any further, but still force your legs to push forward.

I just have to keep going. He’s here, I know it.

All of a sudden you trip on something and feel yourself falling for what feels like forever before waking up with a start.

Fuck.

You groan as you try and drag yourself out of bed, the pain of a headache rushing in as soon as you become vertical. Shuffling over to your bathroom and almost tripping over the multitude of empty bottles scattered on the floor, you reach into the medicine cabinet and scowl at yourself in the mirror. After throwing on the cleanest clothes you can find, you pack your bag and head out.

You used to ride this same bus every morning to work. Just sitting in the seat you used to brings back so many memories of better times, which nowadays you try to drown out with loud music. The city passes by and you stare at all the buildings flying past, wondering if Johnathan is anywhere within them.

The bus stops with a squeak and you walk to the exit, hopping out and walking to your former workplace. Every day since the accident, you visited. Passing by the countless missing person flyers you put up, you pray that maybe today he would be there. It was an unrealistic hope, but you’re trying to be optimistic.

John would’ve wanted me to be.

The workers clearing up the area gave sympathetic smiles as you passed by. They allowed you to use Johnathan’s office to set up camp for your search, just as long as you stayed in that area. You had snuck out a couple of times to try and find hints in the ruins but found no luck. You were also scolded by the workers when you tripped over what looked like a burnt bagel and got scraped up, so you stuck to where you were allowed.

Breathing in deeply, you reach out and turn the handle of the door marked “Johnathan Ohnn”. The room was cold as usual, and you step in and place your bag on the floor before sitting in the old office chair John refused to remove that still had his jacket hanging off the back.

Reaching into your bag, you grab a piece of paper that was messily shoved to the bottom. You look up at the desk where you had put together a small shrine for your friend. It included a photo you forced John to take with you during an office party that he got framed, his leather-bound journal, a candle from a vigil held for the deaths caused by the accident, and all of the encouraging sticky notes you had written each other during work.

“Hey, Johnny.” You pause and laugh a little. “You know, no matter how much I do this, speaking to a photo will never not feel weird.”

You sit in silence, fiddling with the piece of paper covered in your scrawled handwriting and eraser marks, now being dampened by the sweat on your hands. Taking a deep breath in, you speak to the photo again.

“I wrote this. You know I’m not great at speeches, so…be nice. If you are somehow here and hearing this, which is highly unlikely, just know I wanted to say all of this to you. I was planning on it, actually, when you- nevermind.” You clear your throat and breathe deeply, closing your eyes as you exhale and re-opening them to read your paper.

“Johnathan Ohnn, you are one of the best men I’ve met. You’re super smart, more than I could ever be, and you’re really funny. You’re also incredibly handsome- not just by scientist standards like you insist, though. Just in like, regular standards. You’re attractive.” Tears well up in your eyes and your voice begins to waver as you read on.

“I miss you more and more with each passing day. You were one of the only people I could call a friend, and it wouldn’t be a stretch to say I’d fallen in love with you. I’ll never forgive myself for being gone that day, and the nightmares are a constant reminder that maybe things would have gone differently if I had come to work. You almost never took days off, and the only times you did is when I forced you to because you came in sick. You loved your job, and your enthusiasm for science spread to me and gave me hope that things might get better for me. You made my world brighter, and I swear to you I will find you. I know you’re out there somewhere, I can just feel it. And if I do find you, the first thing I’m going to do is tell you how much I love you.” By the time you finished reading, tears had stained the page and your hands were trembling. Dryly laughing, you wipe the tears from your face and look back at the photo.

“So yeah. I love you, Johnny. I’d do anything in the world to hear your voice, to smell your cologne, to get one of your amazing hugs again. If you ever feel like coming back, I’ll take you out for coffee.” At this point you begin sobbing and drag yourself onto the floor, pulling the jacket slung on the chair with you. It hasn’t smelled like John for a while, but just the memory of him wearing it comforted you as you slung it along your shoulders.

Your body shakes with sobs as you face the facts: John has been gone for months and you’ve had no sign of him. You’ve exhausted every resource available, and even when you finally managed to speak with Spiderman, he was pulled away by some stupid villain. You place your head between your legs as you try and catch your breath when you hear a familiar “pop” sound. Every time you’ve visited for the past few weeks you hear it, assuming it was something the workers were doing. This time, it startled you and you jump up, ready to fight whatever creature you imagined appeared. Of course, there was nothing, and you’re left trying to catch your breath after the scare. Movement by the shrine catches your eye, and you see a piece of paper by the journal that you hadn’t seen before.

Trying to reassure yourself that it was there before and you just didn’t notice it, you walk over to it and pick it up with shaking hands.

I miss you too

Your stomach drops and you want to scream. An overwhelming wave of fear, hope, disgust, and panic rushes over you as you start to hyperventilate.

“Is this some sick joke? Fuck you. Fuck you, I’m just trying to find my friend!” Panting and frantically scanning the room trying to find the source of the paper, you sob and angrily threaten the intruder.

“It’s not a joke.”

A voice behind you makes you scream and you begin to turn, ready to fight despite your lack of any real ability to incapacitate anybody.

“Don’t turn around, I don’t want to scare you.” The voice frantically says and you freeze.

“As if you didn’t fucking scare me already, jackass! I don’t have anything you’d want, I promise.” You try and keep up a tough facade, despite the obvious sobs taking over your body.

“I don’t want anything from you, I just needed to see you again. I couldn’t keep watching you from afar, not when you’re crying over me like that. Not after that speech.” The voice is beginning to sound familiar and you fight the intruder’s orders, turning around and facing the stranger.

“I just told you not to do that, you never listen to me!” The stranger continues to chastise you as you take in his appearance- tall and lanky, all white except for the black spots littering his skin. He has no face, just another black spot in the middle of where his face should have been.

“-I mean, I was doing it for your own good, but it seems that you don’t care all that much.” As soon as you tune back into the stranger’s berating you, something clicks. A sob escapes your mouth as your head spins.

“See, now there’s a reaction. I told you not to-” The stranger stops abruptly as you run into him, almost knocking him over and wrapping your arms around him.

“Johnny…” is all that manages to escape your mouth as you sob.

“You…recognize me?” You nod into his chest as he hesitantly wraps his arms around you.

“I’ve been looking for you.” You whisper.

“I know. I didn’t know what to say to you, or I would have come sooner. I’m so sorry.” His grasp on you tightens and his hand reaches up to stroke your hair.

You stay in the embrace, holding on as if when you let go you’ll he’ll be gone again. When John finally lets go, you grab hold of his hands and look at his face. At least, where his face should have been. Despite what should have been a frightening appearance, all you feel is joy. Your friend and the one person you’ve loved is back, and you don’t care what he looks like.

“Hey, don’t you have something to say to me?” John asks, cocking his head.

“Do I?” You sniffle.

“You know, that you love me or something…” John teases.

“Okay, yeah, I did say that.” You laugh and roll your eyes.

“I was gonna confess my love for you that day. After work.” John says quietly.

“I wish I had been there. Things might have gone differently, I could have helped…” You’re cut off by John shaking his head.

“It wasn’t anything you could have stopped.”

“But I still could have been there for you.” Tears fall down your face as you reach up and place your hand on John’s cheek.

“You’re here now.”

“And you’re here now.” A grin spreads across your face and you wrap your arms around John once more. “I love you, Johnny.”

“I love you too.” John pulls away and takes a seat on the office chair. “Now, it seems we have some…catching up to do.”

#aughhghg #shoots myself #IN JOY DW

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