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theoreticslut · 4 years ago

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Fic Review please! 📚 it’s called “Charlie’s Person Looking Friend” on AO3. It’s about Charlie Weasley going through his years of Hogwarts making friends and discovering he’s Ace/Aro and him having autism. It’s not long but it’s jam packed with heart!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/22061044/chapters/52649431

First off, such a good story!! I think the title is so clever! I was honestly so confused about it at first, but after reading it it makes a lot more sense and it so cool! Titles are one of those things where it needs to be good and clever, but still make sense to the story which yours does perfectly!

Into the review - I noticed there were two chapters of it and I wasn’t completely sure if you wanted me to read both, but I did anyways so this is kinda broken down into reviews on part 1 and part 2 of it if that’s alright? Whenever you see the “Keep reading/More” just click on it! This got really long 😅

Chapter 1

For all his trouble to get his hair down to chin-level, this is where it had landed him. He was now stuck in a cold boy’s bathroom, missing potions class, with a comb buried and broken in his hair.

poor baby. I understand the struggle all too well but the way you wrote everything was so good! I definitely could understand his frustration even if I haven’t experienced it myself. I also love the way you wrote him feeling out of place! I just felt like I could understand exactly how he was feeling.

“We will fix it, and you can be on your way in no time, okay? No worries.”

this interaction with Blue was so pure 💗 it made my little heart ache and I couldn’t help but smile. I love how gentle they are with Charlie.

Charlie was always taught not to trust Slytherins. He'd heard the horror stories from Bill and his parents. But he wasn’t going to get out of this by himself. There was no way he was going to try to find Bill with that thing hanging off his hair, scraping at his neck.

While it made me sad that Charlie felt he couldn’t go to his brother, I do completely understand it. I also love that Charlie, even though apprehensive, still decided to trust Blue. I think it really goes to show just how comfortable he is with them from the very beginning.

I also really love the entire interaction/scene between Charlie and blue as they introduce him to their hair care products/accessories. I thought it was just so easy-going and sweet and really captured what it’s like when you’re making a new friend, especially one that you already feel comfortable with.

Charlie blinked, wondering why he was telling Blue all of this and why it felt so easy. Surely he should be telling Bill all of this? Writing to his parents? It what they said to do if he had a problem. He had no idea why telling Blue felt more okay.

I loved this part! It made me so happy that Charlie was opening up to someone and feeling comfortable about it. I also really liked how you wrote the confusion it causes too. I’ve definitely experienced talking to someone new and just feeling like I could talk to them about anything and it would be fine but wondering why it was so easy. You would think it would be easier to tell people you know and trust, but that’s not always the case and you just got it down perfectly.

“You seem to not have enough hair for a proper braid right now, but I could try to get those bangs out of your face for a bit,” Blue said, holding up the other dragon clips.

“My family was never big on braids having only one girl.”

“Oh nonsense, as long as the hair is well, long, braids can be worn by anybody. Come on I will teach you!”

Ugh!! I loved this bit of interaction so much! I love that Blue gives Charlie the dragon hair clips, I love that blue teaches Charlie how to braid, and I love that Charlie is just so excited about it all! It just makes me so happy all around ☺️💗

“I was out makin' a friend” Charlie explained, “it’s a person-looking one this time Bill, I promise. Mum told me to make those while I was here.”

Charlie baby 💗 you’re too cute and pure! I love this statement so much, you have no idea! I really just don’t know how else to say it except that I love it! It’s just perfect for the story and said at just the right time. It’s just a really great line!

Charlie felt marginally worse after talking with Bill than after talking to Blue. He never liked being scolded, and it seemed to bother him more than it ever did Bill or Percy.

🥺 ; Charlie deserves to be happy and not feel so terrible for just doing what he pleases. He never purposefully does anything wrong, nor does he really do anything wrong, and yet he’s just constantly feeling like he’s done something wrong and it’s so unfair to him.

One of his roommates Ben Copper...

is this inspired by hogwarts mystery by any chance? That’s the only place I’ve ever seen the name Ben copper and ngl it made me excited when I read that!! Even though he’s scared of a lot I feel like he’s such an amazing character!! If it’s not just ignore this bit!

“You’re right, I’m sorry. That would be awful. Your boots are really cool.” He said smiling down at her black leather boots, little bracelet charms attached to the laces which Charlie sat down to touch.

“Thanks, I like your clips, very punk rock.”

“Really? Cool! I liked them for the dragons, but my brother said they were kinda girly.”

“Punk rock can be girly too, but I think they suit you just fine.” She said, grinning at him. Charlie grinned back, sitting on the floor next to the pink-haired Hufflepuff.

lil excited Charlie is back and I am in love! Something about him getting excited and intrigued over the littlest things just makes me so happy! Not to mention how awesome Tonks is and how easily Charlie decides he wants to be friends with her as well! I’m very happy for Charlie that he’s making friends!!

But if Charlie's new friend was Ted and Andromeda Tonks' daughter, Bill guessed he had nothing to worry about.

===

Bill had something to worry about.

This made me chuckle. I love when people always think everything is fine and then it’s not fine. I also just thought it was written really cute 💗

...but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. Charlie looked so happy. Bill never realized how unhappy he was before this friendship started. So Bill stopped trying to scold him, stopped trying to take care of Charlie how he thought he should.

love that bill is realizing he doesn’t have to be a full-in parent for Charlie anymore!! I know that’s the default setting when you’re the oldest child, but it comes to a point where you just need to be an older sibling instead of a parent and I’m glad Bill is finally doing that!!

Charlie also talked to Bill more, telling him in a big, happy rant what Tonks and he did that day.

Yay!! Sibling relationship healing a little! 💗

He didn’t talk about how his little makeovers happened, but those days Charlie was happiest.

awee Bill is noticing (sort of) what makes his brother happy and is accepting of it ☺️💗 I love that so much!! I love that Charlie is happier and finding himself and I love that Bill is just letting him figure it out for himself!

Bill was usually anything but unobservant so it surprised him he had taken so long to realize any of this. After that small revelation Bill started to pay attention to anything and everything about Charlie. Bill worried if he missed what made Charlie so happy aside from the obvious—dragons— what else could he have missed over the years of trying to wrangle all of his other siblings?

again, I completely understand what it’s like being an older sibling but Bill is doing such a good job at the moment!! Charlie definitely just needs someone to be there and give him attention and not only does he have Blue, but now he’s got his brother doing it too and I think that’s amazing!!

Charlie’s fear wasn’t for nothing. Going home for Christmas break only solidified his need for Blue and their space together. He was glad to be home, but the way he felt with Blue, and even Tonks and now Bill, was a stark difference from how he felt at the Burrow. He didn’t want to feel this way.

It makes me sad that Charlie doesn’t feel his best at home, but I know not everyone does. I just love how you’ve written it to make it so well known. I also love the fact that Charlie at least had one place he’s comfortable, even though it’s the people he keeps company with that make it comfortable.

“Mum” Charlie whined “it’s not like that. Her name is Tonks, and she’s my friend.”

“I’m sure she’s just a friend now, but we’ll see how you feel when you get older, huh?”

“There’s nothin' ‘just’ about it!” Charlie was raising his voice now, clearly angry. “She’s my friend. She’s important to me. Why do you act like friends don’t matter as much?”

such a well written section!! I love the writing and I love the conversation. It’s relatable yet powerful all at the same time. My family used to tease me all the time (still do a bit) whenever I made friends with a guy and we were close. It’s beyond frustrating and it just embarrassed me when there’s no need for it. So I love how you managed to get that across in the story so well!!

“Oh, Charlie” Bill sighed, closing the door slowly so it didn’t squeak too much.

“It’s not fair!” The little blanket lump said, the sound of little feet and fists repeatedly banging harshly against the wood floor. “It’s MY hair! What’s so bad about it?!”

“There’s nothin' bad about it,” Bill said, crouching next to Charlie and snuggling him so he didn't hurt his hands. “Mum just thinks certain ways about what boy’s hair should look like is all.”

whether Bill came looking for Charlie because he was actually worried and wanted to see how he was or if he just did so because he felt he had to being the older brother doesn’t really matter. I love that Bill was so caring of Charlie either way. I love that he’s so physically affectionate with him to comfort him. I also like how he tries to explain their mother’s side (not saying it’s right) but I just like that he’s not taking sides per se, just explaining to Charlie that it isn’t him that’s the problem. It’s just their mother’s mindset.

“You know what? We can pack that hair growth potion dad has. The one he used when Fred blew his eyebrows off.”

“Really?” Charlie gasped, looking up at Bill. He could see little hair locks of what was left of Charlie’s bangs popping out of his bundle. Bill held out his hands and Charlie crawled in his lap, blankets coming with.

“Yes, really,” Bill said rubbing his back. Charlie's little arms holding onto Bill for dear life.

ugh brotherly love 💗 this makes me so happy. I think it’s so well written and the imagery is just perfection!!

“And you know what? I’ll grow my hair out too. She’ll have to reckon with the both of us.”

yay Bill!! Such a good brother standing up beside your younger brother for something that makes him happy. Empower him and make him feel confident in who he is and what he likes! 💗💗

He didn’t fully understand Charlie, but Bill was starting to realize he didn’t have to. All he had to do was be there and let Charlie be Charlie.

Ugh!! This was so lovely! I just love how you wrote it. How even though he doesn’t fully understand he doesn’t have to. That’s not the point in any of it. Just being accepting and supportive is all that is needed. I feel like more people need to realize that. It doesn’t matter what you think about someone else or if you understand them. You aren’t them, are you? Just be respectful and try to be accepting please.

Chapter 2

Bill also started to get Charlie beauty related things for Christmas and his birthday.

awee yay!! ☺️💗💗

Charlie’s face when he opened Bill’s present, opened last at Bill`s request, made the tedious muggle money exchange and trip all the more worth it.

I love gift-giving! This completely described why too! Seeing the other person smile is just so worth it!!

Bill let out an ‘ouff’ as Charlie hugged him, snuggling into his chest.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” Charlie squealed, “Bill! You’re the best!”

Bill chuckled, surprised at the hug as Charlie didn’t like contact often.

Bill is getting so much better with Charlie and it makes me so happy!! He’s standing up for him, giving him his attention, and he’s actually putting forth effort into their relationship!! All of it just makes my heart so happy! I honestly smiled so much as I read this bit!

Tonks and Blue also gave Charlie Christmas presents that year.

I don’t want to keep quoting so much of your story so the description will just be really long on this one; 1st - it makes me soooo happy that Charlie has two good friends now!! He’s happy and can share himself with people and it’s just absolutely amazing!! 2nd - both of them had such thoughtful gifts!!! I thought it was amazing and each was so them! Like it relates to their friendship with Charlie instead of being just some standard, “we’re friends and I love you” gift.

He watched carefully as Blue opened his gift to them. They pulled out the necklace Charlie had made, the matching earrings sitting next to it.

“The stones are from the stream near my house,” Charlie said.

“You made these?” Blue gasped and looked at the jewelry with a new reverence.

Charlie you sweet boy 💗 I think you just made Blue’s day with your gift and I couldn’t be happier. I love that he handmade the jewelry for them and put so much thought into it. It really shows how good of friends they are and it’s just so so so good!! Along with that, I LOVE blue’s rant after Charlie is dissing his gift to them because it’s “not nearly as expensive” like I’m so glad they told Charlie how it is and how the price doesn’t matter but the thought of it does!! Just so well-written! 💗💗💗

“You’re my best friend Charlie.” They felt Charlie relax and chuckled, tilting his chin up. “No romance here. I am still aromantic asexual after all.”

I LOVE that you went into detail about what aromatic and asexual mean!! I feel like the way you did so was easy to understand and how it was just so casual. I hate to say that I’m not fully clear on everything regarding LGTBQ+ but reading the way you wrote this explanation helped A LOT and I didn’t feel dumb or embarrassed for not completely knowing it. So thank you for doing that!! I appreciate it so much and again it is just really well written!!

“They worked at themselves a lot. They were not always the best listeners, but they had kids and they forced themselves to learn to listen, be patient, and just be there. But I had to do work on my part too. If something was bothering me I told them. I had to realize they were humans too, and humans can be wrong. That was my part: telling them when I had an issue. It was their part to listen, and then try to do something about it together.

& this part!! Thank you for this! I love that you included it’s a two way street to understanding and acceptance. You can’t just expect people to know everything right away regardless of the topic and I like how you put it; My part is to say when I had an issue(but still realizing that they’re humans too), their part is to listen and then try to do something. I just really love how you put all of this in there. That it is an effort on both parties.

“I said my mum’s and I did research together when I came out right? Well, they do not bug around when researching something to do with their kids. I have whole books on this kind of stuff. I am a walking encyclopedia at this point.”

“Books sound nice. Do you think I could borrow them?”

I love this. I love it so much. I love the dynamic between Charlie and blue, I love how you’ve written everything, I love all the explaining you do. I just love this.

Overall, I am in love with this story. Thank you so much for requesting it to me. I’m not normally on ao3 (because I’m just very confused by it’s set up) but I’m very glad I got to read this!!

Like I said, I love how you explain everything. It’s clear enough to understand but it’s also not forced like what I usually see or hear. I like that you just state it as it is. I also love that the tone you seem to carry is that all you can do is educate others and hope they learn. I’m really not trying to be rude, but it seems like any time I’ve talked to anyone LGTBQ+ they expect me to know everything about them right off which is really annoying because I don’t even know everything about myself yet. So I really really like that you don’t seem angry or upset that people don’t necessarily know everything. It just really nice to have it explained calmly and not in a tone of judgement.

While there are times when the way you’ve written things (more like the descriptions/imagery/background info) is a little confusing, it’s not to the point where I can’t figure out what you’re saying. I feel like every writer has times where we know what we’re saying but we just can’t get it across clearly. I’m also just a bit tired while reading this so it could just very well be my own head not comprehending.

Either way, this was an amazing story!! Thank you again for requesting it to me ☺️ I love the way you’ve written everything and how you explain things well. I also like that it focuses on Charlie and has Bill as the main sibling in it because I don’t think I’ve ever really seen anything with Charlie besides being a very small part of it. It’s upsetting because he is one of their siblings. even though he’s in Romania, you can still write about him.

Anyways, I’ll stop rambling now. I really like this fic and I’m really glad you sent it to me! Thank you again ☺️💗

#harry potter #fic review #harry potter fic review #charlie weasley #a03 #theweasleyslut’s end of the year party #send me asks #lets have some fun

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urimaginespimp · 4 years ago

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Michael Gray: Better Man pt 12

The long overdue talk between Michael and Olivia finally happened, and the heavy tension that came along with it was out of the window.

She couldn't deny that it made her feel like a heavy weight was lifted off her. And he himself seemed to be happier and less tense.

But now what?

Though their talk ended with them being in genuinely good terms, there was something they didn't really get to discuss: where do we go from here?

It was as if both of them were now playing a dangerous but lighter game. The way they'd treat each other was in no means how a purely platonic pair would, nor was it crossing boundaries to a territory where intimate couples would be in.

He would kiss her often, when he's going out of the house or just getting settled in; to greet her in the morning or when he's about to sleep. But it was only either on the back of her hand, her cheek, or her temples.

She would get close to him, maybe lean in for support when she was doing something next to him, to rest for a while, or just because she felt like it; enjoy his cologne while he'd put his arm around her, or even lock arms together when walking down the streets. But she wouldn't give his jaw little pecks like she used to, nor would they intertwine their hands together.

--- Olivia was combing her wet hair in the mirror by the living room when she heard him say good morning. Looking at him as he appeared on the mirror's reflection, he was going down the stairs already dressed up for the day.

"Good morning, Mikey" She answered back with a grin.

"There wasn't enough supplies in the cupboards. I'm heading out for some groceries, and I'll see you in your office." Michael said, approaching her with a grin, then giving her a quick kiss on her cheek.

Every time he did so, she couldn't help the blood rushing to her cheeks. But it was also followed by that annoying little voice of reason at the back of her mind, asking her what in heavens were they doing.

"New York better be careful when you're on the loose in it's streets." She smiled slyly at him.

He laughed at what she said and poked her on the side, causing her to yelp and drop the comb. And before she could make him pay, he was already out the door yelling a quick goodbye to her.

Michael can't deny to himself that he wants to do more than just kiss, touch, and hold her on zones a really really close friend could. But he was doing a great job at containing himself. He wasn't going to cross the line unless she asks him to.

"Well if it'll all be up to her , we might as well just buy friendship bracelets." He muttered to himself, chuckling as he was walking down the streets of New York.

Olivia back at their apartment was just about to finish tidying up the place when there was a knock on the door.

Nobody else in the city except for Michael and Ginny knew where she lived.

That's odd. Ginny rarely leaves the diner when it's daytime, and Michael finally has a spare key. She thought to herself, approaching it slowly as the knocking continued.

Pressing her ear against it, she asked who is it.

"It's the young widow you left in Small Heath." A familiar feminine voice replied.

Ada.

"Linda?" She asked, acting clueless.

The audible gasp and scoffed that followed from the other side of the door was enough to make her break into laughter and finally open the door, to the unamused face of one of her oldest friends.

"Of course I knew it was you!" She laughed at her, opening her arms open for a hug.

Ada rolled her eyes as if in annoyance but nevertheless caved into the hug.

"I've missed you so much, Livy." Ada said into the hug.

Pulling away from each other, Ada's sweet face turned into an angry one, and she gave Olivia a pinch on the forearm.

Yelping, Olivia asked what the hell was that for. Rubbing the small area that was already turning pink.

"Well we made a pact never to pull each other's hair, scratch faces, or go over just pinching, remember?" She replied, crossing her arms together and shrugged.

"Of course I remember! But why?" She asked incredulously.

"You made me miss you, and you never called." Ada answered shyly, looking anywhere else. "nor wrote." She added.

Olivia smiled at this. "Well, would you please come in so I could start making up for it?"

"You better." Ada threatened, trying to hold back from smiling.

"Does anybody else know my address now, then?" She asked, closing the door, and hanging Ada's coat on the rack.

"All it took was making Karl fake cry in-front of Thomas because he was really missing his auntie Livy." She answered, placing her one piece luggage down.

"Yet Karl's not here with you?" They were now sitting on the sofa, facing each other.

"Oh he might actually need a little refresher of who you are. So he's back home with aunt Poll." Ada replies sheepishly.

The two women shared a laugh.

"So... I see that devil cousin of mine isn't here right now. Tell me everything I need to know about you two here in New York." Ada asked excitedly. Oh it felt just like the times they spent sharing about each other's love life back in Birmingham.

By the time she was done, Ada had never had her mouth gaping like it was now.

"W-wait. What the hell are you two doing?"

"We're co-existing in this apartment?" She answered.

"Oh I'm happy you two made peace of the past. But I'm talking about now." She clarified. Olivia then understood what she meant.

"I don't know A, but is it weird to say that I'm enjoying it?" She smiled shyly at her friend.

"Of course you do. And I'm loving how it's like you're trying to see who'd give in first." Ada winked at her.

"What are you talking about?"

"Well it does sound like a type of foreplay. You-l"

"No it's not" Livy cut off her laughing friend.

"Oh it definitely is, Livy. And you need to win."

And just when she was about to respond, the front door opened again. This time, the person that was subject of their conversation walked in with a paper bag with him.

"Your office was still locked so I figured you're still here." Michael called out loudly, and stopped in his tracks when he realized who was with her.

"Michael." Ada acknowledged him, but any hint of the smile she was sharing to Olivia earlier was gone and replaced with coldness.

"It's good to see you, Ada." Michael nodded at her.

Olivia was confused. Michael and Ada were close. He was a great uncle to Karl, and she was always up to tag along the both of them when they asked her.

"I'll uh- arrange these in the kitchen." Michael said awkwardly to her, and left.

"What was that?" Olivia asked her quietly.

"Well, I have been mad at him after what he's done to ya." Ada whispered back in defense.

Olivia groaned. She hadn't anticipated how their own relationship problem could affect Michael's relationship with his family.

As if reading her mind, Ada called her attention.

"Oy. It was his fault. Not yours."

Olivia nodded.

"But since you two made up, I might just go and talk to him right now." Ada stood up, and motioned for her to stay seated so she could talk to him alone.

When Ada got to the kitchen, Michael was just about to throw the brown paper bag into the bin, when she cleared her throat.

This was enough to get his attention.

"I heard you two made up." She started, fidgeting with her fingers.

"Yeah. Livy's a saint to even listen to me." This has been the longest exchange of words they've had for the last two years.

"That's good to hear, Michael." She nodded.

"I'm sorry for hurting your best friend and driving her away from our family, Ada. I completely understand why you've been hating me."

"Well I don't hate you anymore." She gave him a small smile.

"Thank you." He broke into a smile, almost tearing up at the fact that she was the first of the Shelby siblings to actually forgive him for what he'd done to Olivia.

Sure, Arthur and John still spoke and joked around him, even Finn when they got past the time they almost got into a fight. But it never felt the same. He knew deep down they were also disappointed with him. Thomas was as usual all business talk.

"I said I don't hate you anymore. But that doesn't mean you're a hundred percent forgiven." She smiled at him.

"What do I have to do then?"

"I'll let you both enjoy this weird foreplay you both got going right now, but I want you to be the one to actually ask what she wants from this." She explained. "It's for the both of you. You can't just be stuck in this weird phase forever."

Michael nodded in understanding. "I'll talk to her about it when you go back." He promised.

"Good. In two days then." Ada nodded back in approval. "Now give me a stupid hug."

Michael chuckled and approached his cousin, engulfing her in a bear hug.

When the cousins came back from the kitchen, Olivia was still seated and now immersed in a book.

"Livy I wanna go sightseeing by myself. I'll be back by the time you're back from the office." Ada told Olivia while grabbing her coat from the rack.

"Oh that reminds me. How long are ya planning to stay?"

"I'll be out of your hair in two days, luv." She answered, putting her coat on and fixing her hair. "So you owe me two days worth of catching up."

"I'd be glad to, A."

"Oh except for Night times."

"What?" Michael asked what she meant.

"Remember when before he passed away, I promised Freddie that I won't be sharing a bedroom or let alone a bed at night with anyone else but Karl?"

Both Olivia and Michael nodded but was confused. What the hell was she talking about?

"Well it was a romantic promise yet I didn't realize it lacked detail such as exempting family and female friends, and Freddy isn't really here to discuss it with." She opened the door.

"It's still up for a year, so you two better pick which room to share now BYE!" She hastily answered with a wink, already leaving them both.

#Peaky Blinders #peaky blinders imagine #peaky blinder imagine #peaky blinder fanfic #michael gray #MichaelGray #Michael Gray imagine #michael gray x reader #michael grey #polly gray #polly grey #thomas shelby #Arthur Shelby #John Shelby #finn shelby #finn cole #finn cole imagine

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fanfic-scribbles · 5 years ago

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Lunch Buddy: Chapter Nineteen

Masterlist

<<Previous Chapter Next Chapter>>

Overall Story Facts: Fandom: MCU Captain America/Avengers

Story Summary: Steve Rogers makes a friend. A prickly, generally people-averse friend, but they’ll both take what they can get.

Quick Facts: Friendship (/Eventual Romance) – Steve Rogers & Reader (leading to Steve Rogers/Reader) – Female Reader

Story Warnings: Reader-insert that verges on OFC, written in 1st person past tense

Chapter 19: Twelve Strikes

Chapter Summary: Honestly, New Year’s Eve is usually mostly uneventful for most people. Usually. Mostly. For most people.

Chapter Word Count: 5380

A/N: This chapter was kind of fun and I hope you enjoy it. I really hope you enjoy it actually because while I know sort of how I want the next chapter to be I have no idea how it’s going to go, so an update might take a little longer. Also, just housekeeping news: I’ve been thinking about it for a while and I decided to make this story a series. Part one is this, the getting together. Part two is tentatively titled “Dinner Date” and it’s pretty much going to be the cute couple shit I’ve been wanting to write. I haven’t decided how yet I want to organize it, whether I’ll just be adding a new section to the LB masterlist or making a new post and linking it. I’ll let you know by next chapter as it will be the last one for this story before I start the next.

Anyways, please enjoy!

This was a bad, bad, bad idea. Me, alcohol, Steve, Steve’s friends, Steve, Steve in a tux, me, alcohol–

“Are you hiding already?”

I almost leaped out of my skin, but Sam just laughed at me. Jerk. But I hugged him because it was good to see him. And, if I was being honest, it was literally good to see him– Sam was a beautiful man and looked no less in his dark blue suit. However when I hugged him I was fine and normal. Why couldn’t I just appreciate Steve as an objectively beautiful man the way I could appreciate any of his friends as objectively beautiful people?

Although Natasha was so stunning in her long glittery black dress that I had run to the bar so I’d have an excuse not to babble “you pretty lady” at her like the caveman I was. So maybe I was just a mess.

“I’m just– getting a drink,” I said and gestured, only to accidentally hit the glass and scramble to keep it from sliding right off the ridiculously smooth and utterly unblemished “wood” counter. That’s what the whole place felt like actually– bright and shiny with nary an imperfection to grab onto.

“You okay?” Sam asked and leaned against the bar. His body blocked me from a happily chattering couple just as they made it to the space next to us, and I tried to calm the fuck down. Steve invited me, I got in just as easily as anybody, it was fine; I was fine.

“I’m okay. Can’t remember the last time I went to an actual party but other than that.” I picked up my drink but it was already almost gone so I put it right back down. Even if I wasn’t trying to monitor my alcohol intake that would have been worrisome. I breathed. I was here and I (and everyone else) was going to have to deal with it.

“Yeah, it’s not really my scene either, but.” He shrugged and smiled. “It’s New Year’s Eve; why not live it up a little?”

Said the man who looked like he belonged here. “I guess,” I said and looked around. I still wasn’t sure if I wanted to see Steve or avoid him.

Sam motioned for a bartender and made a few smooth hand gestures that got me a refill and him a copy of my drink. He took a sip, paused, and then raised both eyebrows at me.

“Don’t you judge me,” I said and sank closer to my cup. “Steve promised good alcohol. And this isn’t even the top shelf.”

“I’m pretty sure it’s all top shelf. But I wasn’t going to say anything.” He pushed away from the bar. “Come on; you found the best thing about Tony’s parties and now I’m going to show you the second best thing about them.”

That did make me perk up. “The food?”

Sam grinned. “The food.”

Second best had yet to be claimed, as first place was a tie.

“Do you think they’ll miss it if I just steal the whole tray?” I asked, staring at the waiter walking around with the really good wraps. I didn’t know what the hell was in them but I didn’t care. If I ended up poisoned later I would have no regrets.

“Thor’s done that before,” Darcy said. “It was awesome.”

Jane’s expression told me why Darcy used past tense. Too bad, but I could tell why he would have towed the line. Darcy (“Avengers wrangler extraordinaire”) and Jane (astrophysicist and Thor’s partner) were kind, smart, beautiful, and fun. That guy kept really good company.

“I think Steve’s done it too,” Sam said. “At least once.”

“Hm.” The tray was getting low, so I looked around the room for another one to pick at. “Do you think if I say I’m eating Steve’s share they’ll just hand it over?”

“What am I sharing?”

I took a moment to, again, chill the fuck out, and then I turned to look at Steve. Somehow it was easier to see him all put-together in a suit now than it had been the night he had shown up all disheveled, but he still looked stupid handsome in straight black and combed hair.

“I’m going to eat all the food on your behalf,” I said and swatted at his stomach. Lightly, because I wasn’t a jerk (and otherwise I would have just hurt my hand). “I’m helping you watch your waistline.”

“I've seen how much Steve eats,” Natasha said, coming around him and somehow making Steve look boring with her dark red matte lips, sparkling chandelier-like earrings, and flawlessly fitting gown. She smiled at me and raised a single perfect eyebrow. “I’d like to see you try.”

“Would you like some?” I asked her. “I’ll share. Just not with Steve; he owes me, like, at least three more grocery bags of snacks.”

“So much for hospitality,” Steve said. He sounded like he was trying to be flat but the smile he couldn’t wrestle off his face fucked that up. But it was a good thing. “If I give you all my food here are we even?”

I thought about it. “The food is pretty good…”

He laughed and opened his arms, and I went in for the hug. When he squeezed me my heart did a happy little somersault and I briefly considered letting him break it. Any more of this and I would have small woodland creatures following me pretty soon. Talk about a dead giveaway. “Easy, easy,” I said and tried to straighten up. “I have delicate alcohol here.”

“Oh, right; I forgot about what’s really important,” Steve said, still smiling widely as we parted.

“I’ve got priorities,” I said and took a sip. “Alcohol, you.”

“I come before food?”

I had to think about it. “Alcohol slash food, you.”

“I come before–”

“Take a fucking compliment Steve,” I said and downed the rest of my drink. A few of his friends laughed and I gave myself a mental pat on the back.

“If only,” a new person said. A beautiful blonde woman who had somehow sidled up right between Steve and Natasha without me noticing. Without Steve noticing too, by the way he jolted. But he looked delighted to see her. “Sharon,” he said and hugged her carefully to keep her full flute of champagne from spilling over her ash grey silky smooth dress. For fuck’s sake; could Steve have one friend who didn’t look like a goddamn model?

When Steve turned to introduce us I realized, oh yeah, that was me. My glass was far too empty but I swallowed back the bitterness on my own. Sharon was very sweet and had no problem turning her attention away from Steve to properly greet me. Unlike the people starting to gather and gawk.

“That’s a lovely bracelet,” Sharon said. “May I see?”

“Sure,” I said, feeling my mood lift at the mention. She and Natasha admired it. As well they should have.

“It’s beautiful,” Natasha said. “Where did you get it?”

“Um…” I looked around at all the strangers, some of whom were trying to sneak in closer to Steve– who looked a little uncomfortable while some woman chatted him up. I decided to play it safe and said, “A friend gave it to me for Christmas.” Hopefully my smile didn’t look as big as it felt.

“A friend?” Sharon pressed.

“A very good friend,” I said.

She tilted her head and smiled like we were in on something together. I wished I knew what it was. “Are you sure they’re just a friend? That’s a pretty special m–”

“Hey, do you want me to go get you another drink?” Steve asked me.

I was sort of relieved Steve stomped on the conversation at that point because I was just going to be miserable if we tread that road too far. However I couldn’t believe what he was asking me; he must have been desperate to escape his conversation. “Do you have any idea what I’m drinking?”

“I can guess,” he said, which…he never drank, so how… “Fine; then come with me?”

I looked at Sharon who was seemingly unbothered by the interruption. “I’ll see you around.”

“Yeah, it was nice to meet you,” I said and Steve, acting the perfect gentleman, gave me his arm to hang onto while we made our way through the crowd. Hanging onto Steve, good alcohol, his friends being nice and not looking at me twice; I actually felt…okay.

“Are you having a good time?” Steve asked, sounding hopeful.

“Did you see that? I had a perfectly normal conversation with another human being,” I said proudly.

“You’re doing very well.”

I jumped as Natasha came up and took his other arm. “Hello again Natasha,” Steve said, sounding annoyed. Apparently he didn’t like her sudden appearing act either.

“You're not the only one wanting the bar, Steve,” she told him. She then looked past him to smile at me. She did ‘reassuring’ shockingly well. Well, she was a spy; she could probably do anything she wanted. “How are you doing?”

“Oh, I’m fine, thanks,” I said. “You look gorgeous, by the way.”

She batted her hand at me, but it was her coquettish smile that made me laugh. “Be careful with complements like that, or I’ll steal you from Steve so I can hear them more often.”

It might have been a joke, but a woman like Natasha was so beautiful maybe people just assumed she knew. “You should hear it more often,” I said sincerely.

Natasha’s smile smoothed out– in a good way, I thought. She gripped Steve’s arm hard enough to make him flinch. “I’m glad you got yourself someone with sense,” she said and slipped away just as we got to the counter.

“It’s a little sad you make me look sensible by comparison,” I said and ordered another drink for me, and something for Steve to try.

“It’s a low bar,” Steve admitted and put his arm around behind me. It was just because the space was crowded, but it felt so nice. When the drinks were delivered I grabbed mine with one hand and slid Steve’s over to him with the other. “Am I carrying your drinks now?” he asked.

I elbowed him and looked around for one of the less-populated areas of the room I had scoped out earlier. “I think you’ll like the taste of it,” I said and grabbed the edge of Steve’s jacket to lead him. “Come on; let’s go catch our breath.”

He didn’t complain then; he just followed along.

“Captain Rogers!”

Or tried to.

A woman (beautiful, of course) with wavy blond hair came right up to him– and I got my first red flag when Steve tensed up. I got my second red flag in flashing lights when she practically shoved in between us. Had I stayed where I was it would have been literal, but I managed to save my dress and drink from combining. And, when she failed to apologize (or even acknowledge my existence) I considered turning my glass up over her head. Instead I took a sip to quell the growing rage and glared daggers at her perfectly-made-up head.

“Hello,” Steve said and looked at me. I lifted my cup and mimed dumping it on her. It got a smile, at least.

“It’s so good to see you again; I missed you at the last party,” she said and gave me an aneurysm when she wrapped her arms around his arm. Steve tugged but man, she had him worse than a boa constrictor. It was almost admirable, if I didn’t want so badly to take some hairspray and a lighter to get her off.

I took another drink. ‘Down girl; he isn’t yours,’ I told myself. It didn’t do much.

“I wasn’t at the last party,” Steve said, looking at me and drawing her attention.

I got my polite face on just before she turned her head my way. She sized me up and I stared at her. Yeah, pretty, sure. But Sharon was prettier. And nicer. “Hello,” Handsy said, perfectly icy. “Do you need something?”

‘Yeah– for you to fuck off,’ I thought. “Oh, I’m just waiting for Steve,” I said and smiled. It felt bland and fake and I didn’t care if it looked it.

“Well, we’re going to be a while,” she said even though Steve’s face clearly said that no, no they weren't.

“That’s fine; I’ll wait!” I said, a little more chipper than I wanted but, fuck it, she was pissing me off. She glared at me, so at least the feeling was mutual.

“STEVEN!”

We both jumped and Steve took the chance to extract himself from Handsy’s grip. “Thor!” he said and the two of them gave (and therefore received) hugs that looked like they would crack lesser spines. Wow Thor was even bigger than I thought he would be. Objectively he wasn’t that much bigger than Steve, but it felt like he filled the room. It was a little intimidating. But Handsy smiled patiently, and she was the reason I stayed close by– I didn’t want to risk leaving Steve alone with her.

“I want you to meet someone, actually,” Steve said and that was all the warning I got before Steve reached around Handsy to grab me and pull me in front of him so he could introduce me to Thor, Thor to me.

“It’s a pleasure to finally meet you,” Thor said and shook my hand with very measured strength. It was easy to forget that Steve was strong, but I had a feeling you couldn’t forget it with this guy. “I’ve heard many good things.”

That sounded a little rehearsed, so maybe he was nervous and awkward too? I ran with it. “Likewise,” I said, because it was polite, and also true. Steve really respected and liked Thor and I wanted to make a good impression. I just didn’t know what to say. “I, uh, met Jane and Darcy earlier.”

He brightened at the mere mention. “Are they not wonderful?”

“They’re great,” I said and (only partly joking) added, “You’re a lucky guy; you must have done something pretty good to deserve them.”

Thor froze.

I froze too and started a chorus of ‘shit shit shit shit shit’ in my head. However I didn’t get a chance to even plan my apology before he let out a loud laugh that made me jump. “Oh, I am sorry!” he said and put his other hand on my arm. “It is true, but I did not expect to hear it from you.”

Weird, but I had the good sense not to say so. I was still coming down from the almost fuck-up so I missed what Steve said, but when Thor enthusiastically responded with a flurry of words that were unrecognizable despite being in a mostly-English sentence, I stepped back to let them geek out. Some people were coming and I really did need a breather, so I waited for Steve to look at me. When he did I held up one index finger, he nodded, and then he put his arm around Thor to lead him in one direction while I went the other.

The gaggle followed them. Or maybe people simply went in that general direction, I couldn’t tell and didn’t really care. I got to a little offset spot where the walls met awkwardly and took a few minutes for myself. I spent most of that time staring at a dark-haired woman who went between Steve and Natasha and I wondered if I had met her yet. She looked familiar but maybe she wasn’t? This was frustrating.

Handsy showed up again just as I was thinking about going back to the bar for some water. “So,” she said, still smiling politely but without even trying to introduce herself. ‘Handsy’ it was then. “How did you meet Captain Rogers?”

Trying to reconcile Steve with the image conjured by “Captain Rogers” caused a cognitive dissonance so strong I nearly had to physically shake it out of my head. “Oh, um…we met at a coffee shop we both happened to be at. Became friends.”

She waited for a few seconds, but since it wasn’t really her business I didn’t go on. “How cute,” she said blithely and smoothed out her dress. Admittedly she did cut a lovely figure in it. “The captain and I met at one of Stark’s parties a while back. We really hit it off.”

“That’s nice.” Thankfully I caught sight of Pepper heading my way so I straightened up at the prospect of a distraction.

Handsy turned to face her too and while I couldn’t see the look on her face, the high-pitched (super fucking fake) excited squeal of Pepper’s name from her mouth and look of absolutely strained politeness on Pepper’s face made me want to merge with the wall to avoid what was almost certainly going to involve bloodshed. But they hugged and, though stiff, they miraculously came out of it with all eyes and limbs intact.

“I’m sorry to interrupt, but if you don’t mind,” Pepper said and gestured at me.

“Oh, of course; it was lovely to see you,” Handsy said.

And then left.

I gawked and when Pepper said my name in a tone of “what’s wrong” I wanted to ask her what the hell that was– in a polite, reasonable way befitting an adult who got invited to a Very Fancy Party– but what came out of my mouth was, “I thought you two were going to fight.”

I glared at my drink in betrayal, but I was so unaffected that it wasn’t even funny so the glass was just a convenient scapegoat. Pepper laughed at least– and smiled to show teeth. “It wouldn’t have been much of a fight.”

I laughed. And then, because I was a (mostly) functioning adult: “Thank you for letting me tag along on Steve’s invite; I appreciate it.”

“‘Letting you’ nothing; I’m glad Steve finally got you to come to one of these,” Pepper said. “How are you doing?”

“I’m all right; taking a breather,” I said. The dark-haired lady was talking to Jane now. “I’m trying to remember names now before I wade back in.”

Pepper nodded. “That’s Maria Hill.”

“Oh thank god, I don’t think I’ve met her yet.” I then realized Pepper was hosting (mostly, I thought; Stark was being loud elsewhere so maybe it was a two-pronged approach) and I looked her over. She looked perfect, but still. “How are you? It must be tiring.”

“Oh, a little.” She waved a hand carelessly. “It gets easier.”

“That’s good,” I said. And had nothing else. I looked around but the bar was busy– Plan B then. “I should go find Steve so he doesn’t think I ditched him.”

“I think I saw him at that end of the bar,” Pepper said and gestured to one of the crowds, because of course. As she motioned though, she saw someone she knew and waved.

“Thanks Pepper. I’ll track him down,” I said as the other person brought his partner over to say hi. Well, that was one hiding place completely ruined. Hopefully the others were all right.

“If you have any problems, just come find me,” she said and went to greet her friend with actual joy and excitement. That was a nice offer that I absolutely wasn’t going to take her up on. I could handle a crowd of people and bitchy partygoers. Weddings were way worse than this scene. So I shored up and went to the place where Steve apparently was. Which he was– in the middle of a crowd of people who had gathered around to listen to Thor tell a story.

I didn’t even try to nudge my way in. I made a trip to the bathroom, snagged a new drink from a small open spot at the bar, and went over to the food table. Natasha and Phil Coulson were talking to their friend (Maria). They looked up when I got closer and I nodded, trying to be unobtrusive as I grabbed a little crostini-thing with some stuff on top of it, but they turned to face me and I stopped before I even got the thing to my mouth. “Uh…” I said, looking at all of them. I lowered the hors d’oeuvre. “Sorry; I didn’t mean to…intrude?”

“You didn’t,” Phil said and extended his hand. I had a drink in one hand and food in the other, and nowhere to put the food. So I shoved it in my mouth, switched the glass to my food-tainted fingers, and shook his hand while I chewed like I was trying to take a prize at an eating contest. Not easy with how crunchy it was but it was good, at least.

“It’s good to see you again,” he said like I hadn’t just done a disaster dance right in front of him. Nice man.

I swallowed. “And in a better situation,” I said, trying to pretend at dignity.

Natasha said my name and then introduced me and Maria Hill to each other. She added, to me, like she was telling me a funny secret, “Don’t worry; she doesn’t bite.” Natasha even winked. Wow; who knew a woman that gorgeous could also be such a fucking dork? I was a little in love.

“Oh Natasha, don’t lie to her like that,” Maria said and very obviously scoped me out. Honestly, I might not have minded the biting. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”

‘Finally?’ What the hell was Steve saying about me? “Uh–”

“Ooo, is this a new spy induction ceremony?”

Tony Stark sauntered up and I tried not to laugh at him outright but the idea was so ridiculous I couldn’t help but snicker. Stark raised an eyebrow at me and I shrugged. “I’m clumsy, would rather walk under a ladder than walk past a gym, and avoid people if I can help it. I would be the worst spy ever.” I swirled my glass. “All that said, thanks for letting me tag along with Steve. I like your booze.”

“At least you have taste,” Stark said. “Are you the reason I saw Rogers walking around with a half-full glass himself?”

“Still half-full huh?” I asked and looked around, but there was no Steve in sight. With the one second loss of attention Tony Stark moved on to talking to the other three. Since I was hemmed in in a way that would attract attention should I leave (and I was right by the best snacks that just got replaced) I stayed and socialized. Or ‘socialized.’ Stark was a talker– not as fast as I had expected but fast enough that whenever he looked at me for a response I only had time to make a facial expression before he was on about something else. He was kind of funny, but also kind of an asshole– like, he was okay, but I still felt cautious and I could see how he and Steve might be at cross-purpose more often than not.

I felt pretty pleasant though. Nobody was glomming onto the Avengers just for being Avengers anymore (even Handsy was off laughing with a group of friends), people were talking around me without making me participate, the lights were bright in a sort of haloed way, I had good food and drink in hand, and the room was comfortably warm. I just needed one more thing and it would have been perfect. Or maybe I was better off without him.

…No. I still wanted Steve around, even if I was being the world’s biggest idiot about having a dumb crush. Even if this only ended in heartbreak and I had to watch him hook up with other people for the rest of my days, his company was worth that much.

I was only half-listening to Tony when he made some dumb joke and I had sussed out his personality enough to comfortably and casually tell him, “Go fuck yourself.”

His mouth dropped open and he gasped. “Cap!” he said and pointed at me like he was a lawyer in a courtroom drama and I was this week’s case. “Your plus one just told me to go fuck myself!”

Warm chuckles drifted on high from behind me and I felt even more comfortable when Steve came around to stand at my side, just slightly behind my arm. “Is that all? She tells me that almost every day.”

I was taking a drink so I flipped Steve off without looking.

“See?” Steve said. “Sometimes even nonverbally.”

“Well,” Tony said, pouting. “Now I don’t feel special.”

I gave him an awkward consolation pat on the shoulder.

Pepper arrived then so Tony turned his mania onto her. I turned my head to look up at Steve. His shoulders were loose and his expression leaned closer to a smile than not. “Hi,” I said, trying not to smile too big.

“Hey,” he said. “Having fun?”

“Mm hm,” I replied. His smile was soft and sweet and the light formed a glow around him.

Someone coughed next to us. Steve jolted and I turned my eyes as far away from him as I could. “I’m sorry,” Steve said to someone else and lightly tugged at the shoulder of my dress as he said my name. “I want you to meet someone.”

I looked back but didn’t let myself get to Steve. I settled my eyes firmly on the (of course, handsome,) wavy-haired brunet next to him. Steve then introduced me to his friend, Bruce Banner.

“Sorry for the terrible first impression,” I said as we shook hands.

“I’m sure Steve deserved it,” Bruce said kindly. “And I know Tony did.”

“Hey,” the two of them said in near-unison.

“You are right,” I said. “On both counts.”

“What is this rudeness at my party?” Tony grumbled. “I could kick you both out.”

“You promise?” Bruce said, which was much funnier than my response of grabbing a few hors d’oeuvres and hastily wrapping them in a napkin.

Steve tugged at my sleeve again as the conversation turned to Who Can Roast Tony The Best. I leaned in closer to Steve and he came down to my ear to ask, “Do you still have that corner open?” in a low voice that made me shudder.

‘Boy do I,’ I thought but kept that to myself. I grabbed his sleeve and pulled as I slipped out of the group, and he followed easily.

The party picked up in noise and excitement but Steve and I stayed in my second-favorite corner for a while, sharing my napkin-wrapped snacks and drinking the water he had momentarily stolen away to grab (and which he refused to replace with alcohol until I had drunk the whole thing).

It was getting a little chilly since we were right by a patio door but I was content and tried to show as much. Steve left momentarily to go say hi to someone and I rubbed my arms, trying to warm and wake myself at the same time. While it wasn’t necessarily past my bedtime it was just…tiring. I was a little relieved that Steve had stepped away, because it gave me a few moments to rest my eyes.

“Hey.”

“Back already?” I asked and opened my eyes as I smiled at him.

“You don’t mind, do you?” he asked and hesitated, like he would actually leave if I said so. Dork.

“Of course not,” I said. “I just…I know you have friends here; you don’t have to keep me company if you don’t want to.”

“What if I want to?” Steve said and glanced around, coming back to me with a shy smile that was begging for a kiss.

I swallowed the urge and smiled at him. “Well. I’m certainly not going to chase you off.”

His eyes brightened and he retook his place next to me. We went back to staying in affable silence and it was good to have a reminder of why I didn’t really want to kiss him. This was the most comfortable I had been with a human being in a very long time and I couldn’t stand the thought of losing him. Not for awkwardness, not for regret, not for anything.

Apparently I was worse at concealing the chill than I thought. “Here,” Steve said and didn’t wait a second before he draped his jacket over my shoulders. “Is that better?”

I was caped with a warm, surprisingly soft jacket that smelled like Steve. ‘Better’ was a wildly inaccurate term; I was lucky I wasn’t fucking catatonic. God, I had problems. “You don’t need it?”

“Nah,” he said. And put his arm around me. “Is this okay?”

“Warm,” was the only word I could form.

“Good,” he chuckled and did not pull away from me, even when the door didn’t open for a while. I was so comfortable. Too comfortable. But I ignored the warning bells and leaned my head against his shoulder, letting my eyes droop a little in comfort.

And then I noticed his friends were staring at us and my eyes opened right back up. Fuck, shit, fuck, did they know? He had at least two spies for friends, they had to know, I was lucky Steve hadn’t yet noticed; how did I get so fucking sloppy? I sat up straight.

“Are you all right?” Steve asked.

“Uh, I think your friends might need you,” I said and nodded in their direction. While he looked over them I swirled the remainder of my water and then tossed it back. “I need a drink.” Understatement.

“All right then,” Steve said and stood with me. “It’s my turn to show you my favorite corner.” And so it was my turn to follow and I did, but when he slipped his arm around me, as we pressed together to squeeze through people, I leaned into it and stole yet another little, selfish moment for myself.

As soon as I got my replacement drink he then led me all the way down the bar, then around and over to a lesser-used part of the wrap-around counter that was away from most of the fun and in an awkward corner that was even out of the light and shaded.

“Nice,” I said. “It’s a little small though. Are we going to rock-paper-scissors or just shove each other out of the way for it?” If I angled just right I could make him shove me into it. Granted, I would probably be made one with the wall, but sacrifices must be made sometimes.

“I have an idea,” Steve said. And he sat down. But just as I was about to commend him on his deviousness he

1) put his hands on my waist

2) pulled

and I

3) turned to grab onto something

4) failed

and 5) fell.

Into his lap.

I sat, frozen for a moment. But I didn’t say anything. Steve didn’t say anything. And I didn’t get up. I just kept…sitting on him. Eventually I found my voice. “Did I crush you?” I asked, feeling a little hoarse, and probably drowned out by the sounds of cheering.

“No,” Steve said, hard to hear through the excitement of the countdown as it started. I turned my upper body to look at him, but whatever joke I was going to make about ‘comfortable seats’ died before it formed.

Steve, half-cast in shadows and whatever scattered lightshow was going on behind us, stared at me, something inscrutable. A spot of red light splashed over his lips for a moment and I couldn’t tear my eyes away. They were slightly opened, dry from the air, and I felt so warm, so…what could it hurt? Just one little moment; would he mind so much just one little ta–

His arms tightened around me and he moved, bringing those lips to meet mine as the room erupted in cacophony. After just a second I slid my drink onto the counter, wrapped my arms around him, and returned the kiss with everything I had.

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#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers & reader #captain america fanfic #avengers fanfic #reader insert #lunch buddy

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starryviolentine · 4 years ago

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Color Me Blue (That’s Me Without You): A Pre-Apocalypse Story

Part 1 (here) Part 2 (here) Part 3 (here) Part 4 (here) Part 5 (here) Part 6 (here) Part 7 (here) Part 8 (here)

Part 9/10: Just the Two of Us

The time has arrived for Therissa to spill some of her deepest, darkest secrets, and it’s no surprise that she’s not looking forward to it one bit. Once upon a time—one that seems like a lifetime ago—Therissa was in total control of her own feelings. Whenever she didn’t want to show them, which was basically all the time, she hid them so convincingly that everyone around her, even her own family, started to believe that she was cold and heartless and incapable of feeling anything at all. But it’s not that Therissa doesn’t feel. She does. A lot. Maybe even more than she should sometimes. It’s just that wearing her heart on her sleeve for the world to see has always been a little much.

Caring is hard. Showing dumb, gushy feelings is hard. Therissa keeps all of her sappiest, most embarrassing ones locked away so deep inside her that sometimes even she herself forgets that they’re there. It’s easier that way.

But as they say, desperate times call for desperate measures. Therissa had been hoping that things would never come to this, but, alas, here she is, seconds away from unlocking the vault. And all for the sake of her twelve-year-old roommate.

“Look, Brody, I’m not trying to make excuses or anything,” Therissa begins, focusing on keeping her voice low and steady as to not reveal how nervous she actually is, “but, like, I was in a really shitty mood the night you got back. My sister had been hounding me the whole freaking day—”

“Mel?” asks Brody in a soft voice.

“Uh, yeah,” Therissa replies, nearly stuttering and raising an eyebrow in slight surprise. “I can’t believe you remembered her name. Haven’t talked about her since—”

The auburn-haired girl gives a small smile. “Since I was ten and you still had those pink streaks in your hair.”

Therissa forces a puff of air through her lips and then starts to laugh. “Of course you remember all the cringey stuff, too.”

“But it looked really c—” Brody starts to say, but she’s immediately interrupted by a pillow to the face. “Ow!”

“Anyway, Mel kept texting me about how our mom was trying to get a hold of me, or whatever. Like, since when, right?” Scoffing, Therissa’s face suddenly turns sour, as though she just tasted something unpleasant. In the next moment, though, her expression relaxes and she sighs. “I know I was probably being a huge bitch, so... I’m sorry.”

Brody looks up at the older girl with blue eyes full of forgiveness. “It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not. I made you feel like shit for no reason. And then when you gave me that shell?” Therissa feels somewhat sick as she remembers her choice of words, then shakes her head firmly. “I shouldn’t have said what I said. That wasn’t cool.”

“Are you sure you don’t think it was lame?”

From the lingering gloomy tone in her voice, Therissa can tell that Brody still isn’t completely convinced. She gives the younger girl a crooked smile and holds out her little finger. “I promise. Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye. All that junk.”

Breaking into a grin, Brody extends her own pinky and links her and Therissa’s fingers together. “Okay, I believe you.”

Even though Brody is only a couple months away from officially becoming a teenager herself, she’s still as much of a dreamer as ever. Somehow she has managed to keep her childlike innocence that most people lose as they journey into adolescence. For Brody, the magic of pinky swears, secret handshakes and friendship bracelets hasn’t yet faded away. She finds joy in even the most mundane things. Never in her life has Therissa met anyone with a bigger heart, who does and feels so intensely, or who believes more strongly in the inherent good in everyone and everything. To put it simply, she’s just never met anyone like Brody.

“So, this may come as a surprise to you, but my friends aren’t exactly nice people,” says Therissa, seemingly changing the subject. It’s kind of a joke. She said it hoping her roommate might laugh, or make a face, or point out that her friends kind of suck. But, then again, this is Brody. Therissa had briefly forgotten that this type of humor doesn’t work with her.

As expected, Brody ponders the statement for a moment, but then she shrugs. “But they’re still your friends, right?”

The expression that Therissa makes in response is indecipherable. “They’re pretty much a bunch of assholes. I mean, like, they couldn’t give two shits about making anyone else happy.” Brody is looking at her in confusion, clearly not understanding why the teen has suddenly started badmouthing her friends. But Therissa purposely avoids the girl’s gaze, head starting to tingle from the rising temperature in her cheeks and ears. “They’re not like you. I mean… like, you’re...”

You’re different. The string of compliments that the teenager intends to cheer her roommate up with twists into a knot that jams itself in the middle of her throat. The fact that Brody is all ears and clearly anticipating the rest of that sentence is only making things worse.

At the last second, Therissa bails. “It’s just, that was the first gift I’d ever gotten from anybody here, and… and, you know, it was a sweet gesture.” All this sugary, sappiness is making her itch, but at least Brody looks a lot better now. “Anyway, are we good then? You and me?”

Brody nods with a smile. “Yeah, we’re good.”

Therissa folds her arms and goes quiet for a moment. “So, like… I know you’re still hung up on ‘missing out’ on the stuff me and Violet did while you were away, but we honestly didn’t do that much. Just stuff to pass the time, you know? It gets kinda quiet in here without our busy bee.”

And just like that, Brody looks upset again. Bringing her knees to her chest and resting her chin against them, the younger girl lets out a teensy sigh, which tells Therissa all that she needs to know. Her job here isn’t quite finished yet after all.

So Therissa kicks her boots off and mirror’s her roommate’s posture, hugging her knees and heaving an audible fake sigh. For a few moments she just stares at the girl across from her with her lips turned down in an exaggerated pout, hoping that when Brody looks up and sees her she might smile again. But Brody seems more interested in the blankets on the bed, so Therissa has to be more direct with her tactics. “Wanna tell me what’s on your mind?”

“Will you promise not to get mad?”

The fact that Brody feels like she has to keep things from her bothers Therissa in a way that she never expected it would. “Of course. Lay it on me.”

“I guess... when Vi told me that y’all did your nails together, I felt…” Brody hugs her legs more tightly as her expression becomes pained from remembering that night again. “I felt kinda sad ‘cause, well… we’ve never done anything like that before. I mean, like… spending time together and doing something really special, just the two of us. And I just… I really wanna do stuff like that with you, too.”

In that moment, everything finally clicks. Therissa realizes that Brody isn’t jealous that Violet got to paint her nails before she did, nor is she disappointed that her roommates had fun without her and she missed it. Not exactly. Not entirely. The real reason why Brody’s so upset—and it makes absolutely no sense to the teen at all—is because she wants to spend time with her. As in, actual one-on-one, just-you-and-me-and-nobody-else time. With her. And Therissa doesn’t understand it because it’s not like she’s ever been particularly likeable, especially when Brody first arrived at Ericson’s.

“And I know you’re so much older than me so it might be kinda lame to hang out, but it doesn’t have to be all the time. Just sometimes, if you want to,” Brody hurriedly adds. Therissa has a strange look on her face, so she’s starting to worry that she’s said something wrong. “Um, sorry, I—”

“Hey, can I ask you something?”

Brody’s heart catches in her throat and she forces it back down a nervous gulp. “Yeah?”

“Why do you even want to hang out with me?” Therissa directs her question at the spot just below the younger girl’s nose but above her lips. Brody’s eyes are looking right into hers and it’s making Therissa feel like she can see all the way inside her. “Ever since you got here, like, you’ve always seemed to… you know... like me, or whatever, and—”

“Because I do,” interrupts Brody, voice full of concern even though Therissa feels like it should be the other way around. “I’ve always liked you.”

“But why?” Therissa doesn’t intend for it to come out so intensely. She has to stop to take a deep breath and lower her voice again. “Explain to me because I can’t comprehend it. Why would you when basically all I’ve ever done is treat you like shit?”

Shaking her head, Brody comes closer. “Do you remember Veronica?”

The teen gives a short laugh. “You think I’d forget her? She was a total bitch.”

“Therissa!”

“What? It’s true and you know it.”

Even though Brody doesn’t like curse words, she can’t deny that her old roommate did, in fact, live up to the name Therissa just called her. Veronica was their roommate back when Brody first got to the school, a couple years before Violet. The mean-spirited teenager was rude, self-absorbed, and always had something awful to say. From the very beginning, Veronica was especially nasty to Brody, calling her names and making awful comments on just about everything she did. Being the oldest—even older than Therissa by a year—seemed to make her think that she was the boss of their bedroom. Both Brody and Therissa pretty much had to walk on eggshells whenever she was around.

And despite all of Brody’s attempts at getting her eldest roommate to tolerate her, Veronica was just plain mean up until the day she left.

“You weren’t like her,” says Brody, giving Therissa a reassuring smile. “You were kinda grumpy sometimes, but you were still nice.”

“Oh, please. I wasn’t nice to you.”

“You were!” Brody insists. “Like, on the inside. In here.” The girl places her hand over her own heart. “I don’t know how to explain it very well, but even when you said mean things, your actions were nice. You still helped me whenever I needed you. I knew that you cared. You never said it, but you showed it.”

It takes a moment for Brody’s words to sink in, but when they do, they hit Therissa hard. All the teen can do is sit there in stunned silence. Everyone Therissa has ever known has always taken what she’s had to give at face value. Nobody has cared enough to look deeper than that. They hear her sharp words and see her cold guise and shy away, easily fooled into believing that there’s nothing else there. But realizing that there’s been someone who could see right through her this whole time? Someone who hasn’t given up on her despite everything she’s said and done? Therissa has never been more touched… and she has never wanted to hug Brody Burress more than she does at this very moment.

And for once in her miserable life, she doesn’t hold back.

Even if it’s mostly to buy herself time to blink her tears away before Brody can see them.

Therissa reaches out and envelopes Brody in the tightest hug, hoping that it conveys her gratitude in a way that she can’t quite express in words. Thank you. The teen keeps the embrace long enough to swallow the lump in her throat and recompose herself. Only one person is allowed to cry in their bedroom per day, otherwise it becomes too much for Therissa. But she does allow herself to say one more thing, and this time she has a good feeling that it won’t get lost in translation. “How did someone like you get stuck in the same room as someone like me?”

In typical Therissa fashion, her kindness comes out in a way that sounds like a joke, but Brody hears the underlying meaning. I’m glad that we’re roommates.

“Maybe ‘cause they knew we’d be good together,” comes Brody’s simple reply. Her voice is muffled by Therissa’s jacket, but it’s clear that the girl is positively beaming. It’s such a rare occurrence for Therissa to initiate any sort of physical affection, so Brody is over the moon knowing that this is just for her.

“Yeah, maybe,” Therissa says softly, giving Brody one final squeeze before letting her go. The teen used to think it was a bit twisted for whoever was in charge of room assignments to leave a defenseless lamb like Brody right at the entrance of her and Veronica’s fox den. Brody was practically a baby—so sweet and pure compared to her two older roommates—and Therissa honestly wasn’t expecting the arrangement to work out. But when she looks back on it now? Maybe they were onto something. “You know you can call me out on my bullshit, right? If I’m ever being insensitive or rude to you for no reason, I want you to feel like you can be straight with me. No more keeping it to yourself. Got it?”

Brody nods, but not very confidently. “I’ll try.”

“Just be like”—Therissa grins cheekily and puts on a heavy drawl, clearly trying to imitate Brody’s accent—“‘Oh, you hush your mouth, Therissa! You’re bein’ a big meanie!’ and I’ll, like, take a chill pill.”

The uncharacteristically playful display has its desired effect on Brody, as the younger girl dissolves into a fit of giggles. “I don’t talk like that!”

Therissa pokes Brody in the leg, smirking. “You totally do.”

“I can do you, too,” says Brody, moving to stand on her knees so that she’s taller than Therissa. She puts her hands on her hips and puts on an exaggerated frown, which ends up being more of a funny, tight-lipped pout from trying her hardest not to laugh. “Ugh, fine, I guess I’ll watch a movie with you before I go back to class, or whatever.”

“What? I’ve never—” Therissa stops mid-sentence, suddenly realizing exactly what Brody is doing. She shakes her head, chuckling. “Oh my god. Okay, I’ve gotta hand it to you. That was pretty impressive.”

“So…?”

When it comes to skipping class, Therissa doesn’t have to be asked twice. Today, however, she had already been planning to stay a little longer, just to make sure Brody’s really okay. Therissa stretches out on the bed to make herself more comfortable and gives a thumbs-up. “As long as it’s not something lame.”

With an excited cheer, Brody hops out of bed to fetch her DVD player and begins spouting off a list of movie titles and plot summaries for Therissa. What she doesn’t know is that the teenager is only pretending to consider all of the options. Therissa has already decided that she’s going to let Brody choose today. After all that’s happened, it’s the least she can do. Therissa’s just going to sit back, relax, and enjoy whatever movie her roomie picks out for them to watch.

Even if it is something lame.

#twdg brody #twdg violet #twdg #the walking dead game #brody twdg #violet twdg #fanfic #color me blue

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mor-beck-more-problems · 5 years ago

Text

An In-Spectre Calls || Cassie and Morgan

Set before the potw. Morgan meets Cassie for the first time and asks for some slightly spooky help.

There was something pathetic about drifting through Eye of Newt alone. Around Morgan teenage witches squealed over crystal balls and bundles of sage, handmade fliers for a Tarot Tuesday covered the table, taper candles of every color stared down their wicks at all the fuss, and so many purple spined books gleamed out from the shelves. It was all so curated, so proud, so...much nicer than the mess of wax and leaves around Morgan’s kitchen table where she made her own wares. Even Vera, Vera, could afford gilt labels for her smudge sticks. Bitch. Worst of all was knowing that few self respecting witches dared to roll the dice here. They had other, better outlets to send for. But Morgan had left a chunk of her self respect somewhere around trying to connect with her ancestors through a three dollar slice of birthday cake. And the shame of all this, re-stocking from her own competition, watching teenagers exercise more freedom and skill with their gel pens than she had bothered to muster lately--settled around her like the heaviest of blankets. At least if she was miserable, she was safe. Probably.

And so Morgan lingered, bitterly taking mental notes on packaging and pining over books she would not be able to afford for another month or more (Vera saw right through any cash she tried to conjure, every time). She had almost tortured herself to the point of boredom when she spotted a familiar face.

Oh. Oh no. Was this some kind of cosmic trick? Was that--the pro bono exorcist girl? The moon was still in Capricorn, so that was in her favor, and Friday was her lucky day, but having an expert fall into her lap, or at least someone else’s storefront, was not the kind of gift that generally came her way. Morgan stopped and stared at the girl more than was socially appropriate.

Fuck it.

Morgan marched up to her, wares still in hand, and leaned over as unobtrusively as she could into her line of sight. She smiled brightly, too mystified at the possibility before her to contain herself. “Hi! This might be a really strange thing to say, but you’re--Cassie, right?” She lowered her voice. “Exorcist Cassie? I hear things around town. And the targeted ads in my mailbox are just--well, anyway, I could really use an expert’s help with summoning something. Someone.”

If you couldn’t make your own grave dust store-bought was probably fine. Wincing at the price tag mark-up compared with the last place Cassie stopped at to stock up she scanned the rows of jars and tinctures for the last couple of ingredients that had been trashed in transit. Fresh out of ash and with no way to make the stuff without either looking like a serial killer or setting the smoke alarm off. Although, on second thought considering the place she was staying, whatever weirdness she brought with her was likely only the sixth strangest thing in that hotel. Speaking of, the four-dollar hole in her pocket was still stinging from shelling out for those Cheerios late last night. Next stop had to be for something that had actually seen the inside of an oven. With that thought in mind she guessed her next stop would be finding someplace to eat some point. The Thai place she passed last night seemed like a good bet.

Like most of its sister stores around the country this place might have been full of wishful thinkers, but maybe there were a couple things that could do in a pinch. Either way she was limited on options and she doubted there’d be anywhere else offering anything any different. Stooping down to read the price tag of a jar of black salt that caught her attention she registered another person in the vicinity. Assuming it was the owner stopping by she straightened up from her crouch by the jars to stand at full height and grabbed up a jar, about to ask if she had anything a little more specific when she registered her name being mentioned followed by the familiar hushed tones, exorcist. That caught her attention as she seemed to peer over at her interestedly. She seemed earnest enough. It was the eagerness that surprised her. Word got around fast, real fast. Anywhere else the whole thing, the whole business really, was a clandestine operation. The routine, ‘Hey thanks for your services, but get out and let’s never speak of this again’ followed by a swift exit was the norm. Not here though. Here it was practically encouraged almost.

“Uh, yeah. That would be me,” she nodded uncertainty, eyeing the store inventory she was holding. “A summoning? You mean to, you know, deal with something?” It was easy to get lost in translation so she tried to follow it with a gesture that she hoped implied giving the boot, “then I can check into it, sure.”

Morgan couldn’t believe her luck. A real exorcist. A real, helpful, exorcist. She bounced on her feet, resisting the urge to clap her hands with excitement. “I thought I recognized your face! And, whew, that would have been really embarrassing otherwise, accosting some poor random person with words like ‘exorcist’ and ‘summoning.’” Was she being funny? The image played hilariously in her mind in a terrible sort of way: the total lack of understanding on the stranger’s face, the painfully awkward attempts at saving face. After so many big setbacks, the reach of this stupid, strupid curse, Morgan found herself hard pressed to believe in lucky breaks or happy cooincidences.

(Did that mean her plan was doomed? Oh god, it might be doomed)

“Oh, but, not like--” she mimicked Cassie’s gesture, growing red and speckled with anxiety. Maybe she should have stayed home and brooded over her hot glue gun situation in quiet isolation instead. Sure, her cat would have still given her judgement eyes from her nest in the bookshelf, but that wouldn’t be half so bad as having this blow up in her face. But like a bad piece of gum on your shoe, Morgan stuck and kept talking.

“I mean, I’ll want them, you know,” She gestured again, “Eventually. But first I want to bring something here. After I’ve gotten the information I need, it should probably go back to wherever, I guess, but I need to get someone first.”

If Morgan had only sensed the ghost judging her from behind, she might have appreciated how funny her request already was, Cassie’s help or not.

Cassie tilted her head a little, “right,” she nodded with a small laugh. “Hell of an icebreaker, right?” She offered. “Either that or they’d just tell you to call in Zak Bagans,” she mock grimaced.

She watched as Morgan repeated the gesture, still trying to wrap her head around the request. Okay, so she did mean summoning something, inviting it. It wasn’t totally unheard of, trying to make contact. Mostly for any lingerers that were already there, but actually folding out the welcome mat? That was still a new one, but she still felt that pang of curiosity that something like that would even work, or why anybody would even want it to.

I need to get someone first.

Looks like you already got them, she mused not unkindly, finally acknowledging the second shadow nearby. Cassie hadn’t made eye contact with the figure lurking in the background until then, but when she did it made her stop in her tracks for a second. They were there alright, but weak. Whoever they were, she couldn’t make anything out past the general humanoid shape and occasional incline of their head as they listened in. Like they were stuck in some halfway point. Weird.

They were here, but they weren’t thrilled about it, but what else was new? Cassie gave them a look that she hoped implied later and turned her attention back to Morgan as she weighed up the options. What were the chances here that whatever she said she was going to do it anyway? Pretty high she was willing to bet. Putting the jar back on the shelf decidedly, “you know what...sure,” she agreed. “I mean mostly I’m there pointing out the exit sign, “she admitted, “but can’t hurt to be around. Let you know if you’re getting warmer”, and to step in in the off chance the invisible man back there had any ideas she added after a second glance.

“Hell of an icebreaker, right?” She offered. “Either that or they’d just tell you to call in Zak Bagans,” she mock grimaced.

“Just ‘little white crest things,’ huh?” Morgan replied with a laugh. “I do promise I’m not like this all the time. Sometimes I say things like how are you, and, I don’t know--what nice, normal weather we’re having!”

This was...nice. Almost fun. Morgan began to sweat behind her ears at the thought Fun was the sort of thing she felt she had to trick her way into. Fun was the kind of feeling that hatched big, wild bursts of ‘come and get me while my back is turned you lousy curse’ energy. And, Christ on a cracker, wasn’t she getting ahead of herself? She was talking with Cassie about what amounted to a work thing, not about making friendship bracelets, or going to the Sadie Hawkins dance. Not exactly the stuff of tragedies, even in her own family tree. Could be safe. And if she had managed to shake certain doom for awhile, and since it was doomed to catch up, maybe she should hold it together and enjoy the reprieve. Pretend to be a less disastrous version of herself until later. Hopefully much later. After they found Agnes.

When Cassie agreed to help, Morgan reigned in the impulse to tackle her with relief. “Thank you, so much! You are amazing, and I will compensate you...somehow. I know conjuring money is pretty high on the questionable morality spectrum, but I can also fix things! If it’s in the broken vase category and not the complicated mechanical one, I can definitely fix it. Or with the right material I can make you something really nice. But, again, not too complicated. I’ve spent more time at the archive than my old alchemy books lately, so. And, drinks, or several, burgers even.” Morgan could feel herself running too fast away from her personal disasters. So fast she almost missed what Cassie added, quietly, as not to set any alarms. Invisible man? What?

It shattered Morgan’s loop of thought and made her go rigid. She cast her gaze back, head-turning slowly. What did Cassie mean? Invisible? Was she being followed? Maybe she had triggered something in the universe and now she was going to watch this blow up in her face before she’d even started. This might be how she died--

Morgan looked. Nothing. Not even a shadow. Then again, that might be the whole point of ‘invisible.’ She turned back to Cassie, suddenly feeling like they needed to get somewhere not in the shop. “Um...what do you mean invisible man?” She whispered. “Like...with some kind of glamour? Or--” It came on her so slowly because until now it had seemed laughably impossible. “Do you mean a GHOST?” She squeaked.

“No kidding,” she laughed, “been here a couple days but this place…it’s something else,” she had to admit. Understatement of the new decade, twenty-four hours in and she felt like she had enough for most of her co-workers to have a field day out here. Difference was, for the most part, she had ethics. “Oh hey, no need. I have a day job,” she waved the offers of compensation off, “you’re good.” The day she accepted cash or handouts for this kind of thing would be the day—wait conjuring cash? At some point, she’d have to ask about that-about all of that, but one thing at a time.

Cassie saw the look that crossed Morgan’s expression and frowned for a second in confusion. It was only after the words were out of her mouth that she realized she’d said that last part out loud and immediately felt like backtracking. Shit, way to scare the crap out of them. She could practically see the alarm bells going off in Morgan’s head. Part of her wanted to bluff, tell her she meant as in the general sense but thought better of it. Better not to start off on a lie. It never ended well.

“Okay so, you’ve got one visitor,” she admitted tentatively, “but you’ve got nothing to worry about, they don’t look like much of a threat.” Cassie cast another glance at them as they continued to hover around nearby like a bad smell. Was that an incline of their head at that last comment? “This’d be a very different conversation if there was, trust me.” She hoped that might take a little of the edge off of it. “I’m free today, least I’ve got nothing much planned. I can stop by, deal with the mystery guest over there, try and get contact properly,” figure out if they’re who you’re looking for,” figure out what they wanted and how they even got there like that she added to herself. The longer she looked at the figure the weirder it got. For a second she thought she saw a pair of eyes take shape before they flickered out again. Interesting. “Or if you wanted to wait,” she blinked and brought her attention back to Morgan, “I can hand over some things to keep them out of your hair for a while give you my cell number and you can text me an address or something. Whichever works.” Cassie pulled her cell out from her pocket and opened her bag out to look for what was left her the black salt but came up empty-handed, “crap, the last of it’s in the car,” she murmured and picked the jar of the stuff she was about to buy again and raised her eyebrows at the price tag. Wow, not for forty dollars I’m not. “This stuff keeps them away,” she lifted the jar back up before putting it back down again. “I have some in the car, but regular salt works, just doesn’t last as long.”

“Are you sure?” Morgan pressed. “You’re kind of doing me a big favor…” But Cassie seemed pretty sure of her stance. Morgan couldn’t figure out why. There had to be loads of people who would pay a lot for help like this. Now that the weight of making up for her services was off Morgan’s chest, she could admit she would have pushed her powers to limit to make this happen. Why wouldn’t you try and get something out of the deal?

But Morgan didn’t have time to think about this because of what Cassie said next. You’ve got one visitor. She had really done it. Maybe? Hopefully. “A visitor,” she repeated, dumbfounded. “A ghost kind of visitor, following me around.” What if it was Agnes? Or one of Agnes’ children? Morgan looked back over her shoulder again, just in case willpower alone could bring it into her sight and understanding. When looked back at Cassie, her face was glowing with held back excitement.

“I need to find out who it is,” she said quietly. “In case it’s who I’m looking for. But the other stuff would be good too. This maybe-kind-of isn’t my first time trying this, just the first time that it’s worked.” She looked at the salt jar Cassie Hefted and made a mental note to up her game in that area. Forty dollars for a little jar. Maybe she should start charging more for her candles; this family quest was getting expensive. “I’d like to see the kind of salt you roll with,” she added lightly. “I’ve been using mom’s old kosher salt, but that was before I knew I should be upgrading. What’s in your mix that makes it different? And, would it be unprofessional if I hugged you right now?”

“Just the one,” Cassie repeated as if that would somehow make it any better. “They’re hard to make out though, which means either they’re weaker, like they’re new or they’re on the out.” Another glance towards the mystery figure and she was sure she picked up the indignation coming off from their stance alone. “Okay. If I can get some stuff from the car, find somewhere quiet I can try and get a read on them. Figure out if this is your guy.” Cassie’s eyes followed Morgan’s gaze back to the discarded jar, “it’s different for everybody, but I like a mix. A little rock salt-any salt really-” she added quickly on review, “some chalk and some Obit ashes mixed in there. Helps with the ‘ashes to ashes part’ it’s not the main focus though. The main part is the words and the intent that’s there." Morgan seemed so enthusiastic and hopeful, she hoped she wasn’t setting her up for a loss. She could do it, hazy figure aside, but actually summoning something was still out of her wheelhouse. She just hoped she wasn’t about to be a let down. Cassie thought for a moment before answering, “maybe save it for when we actually ID your friend, or at least get some contact on line one.”

Morgan took out her phone and made notes as Cassie explained her salt recipe. There was a cemetery near the Traveler’s Rest, should be easy to come by the ashes. She didn’t trust her alchemy-brewed stuff to do the trick, not when it came to warding off whatever had come out of that cake. Morgan didn’t know much about what she was getting into, but she was aware she had passed the ‘in over your head’ signpost few miles behind packing up her life and moving to White Crest.

She settled for a thumbs up at Cassie instead of the hug. “Too soon, got it,” she said, laughing it off. “But it’s not about the success. I mean, success would be great, obviously, but I’ve been at this--for good reason!--for three years now, and this is the first time I’ve gotten, like, help from anyone. Even if you have to go back to your very expert drawing board, I’m still appreciative. Really.” Something in her sombered at the truth in those words, three years banging her head against her laptop, three years trying to get out of bed, trying not to derail her life anymore than this stupid curse already had. Three years and now she was at the zero hour. Of course she was grateful for even the illusion of progress. What did she have left to lose this year except her life anyway? Her shitty jobs? But that wasn’t the right mindset. Think positive. Move forward. She pepped herself up and headed for the door. “So! Let’s go figure this out!”

Mulling over what Morgan had said. About this being the first time anybody had offered some actual help rankled a little. If you could kick them out it stood to reason there was a way to call them up. It might actually be useful for a few things. Maybe if they were lucky whoever she was trying to get hold of was actually still around, strange as that was to say considering, they could actually make contact. “Three years?” Cassie felt her eyebrows raise involuntarily at that information. “Well, least you’ve got it now, the help I mean. If at first you don’t succeed get mad and try again,” she joked. Even if this didn’t go down well first time around, she had a more than a little healthy curiosity at the idea of something like that actually working. “You must really need this guy for something.” Not about to pry, but you didn’t spend that time trying over something trivial. Following Morgan’s lead and heading outside and back out towards where her car was parked Cassie took out her keys and grabbed the duffle bag out from the trunk and draped it over one shoulder. She shifted the weight a little and used her free hand and lifted up a piece of the padding covering the spare tyre space. “One second. I just need a couple things.” Cassie grabbed up a few loose items and stuffed them inside the bag, “this might help identify Mr Mysterio. Get a better signal and figure out if this is your guy.” Closing the trunk over again she turning back to Morgan with a smile. “Okay, and we’re all set. Lead the way.”

“L-lead the way,” Morgan repeated, hoping that repetition would rattle something into place. “To the ghost place, that--would make sense.” She began to walk in the general direction of the traveler’s rest. “But, it’s really interesting you should say that. Because, there’s my room at the Traveler’s Rest where I do most things right now, and there’s Al’s where I did the spell. Or I think I did.” Her cheeks were growing hot again. This had all seemed reasonable, even expected in the moment, but preparing to say it out loud, she suddenly felt like an idiot. “I’m working from scratch with this, but there was a spell on google that seemed to have a familiar structure to it, and I picked the right day, I checked the moon, and all that for maximum potency. But, there might have been...cake involved. And admittedly, that seemed like an interesting ask for a request from the beyond. I don’t know if I should take you to the spot where it happened, or if we just need to duck into my room so the muggles won’t stare at us since they’re supposed to be drawn to me and not the place?” Her voice rose higher as she spoke, struggling to maintain the very logical order of planning she had taken the trouble of going to. “Anyways, it’s...all the same direction. Just a little more--this way. And I can pull up the spell, if that helps.”

“That’s where I live-well, I don’t live there. I’m staying there, or I have a room there anyway.” Cassie wasn’t staying here she reminded herself. It was temporary like everywhere else. “That works,” she looked back over at Morgan with a nod, “or if you wanted somewhere more out in the open, there’s Al’s.” That one was the least favourite option. She hated an audience to this stuff. Growing up it was something to be buried away, not broadcast in public. It was hard to get out of that way of thinking. Old habits died hard that way. “Not sure what the rules are for summoning ghosts in the diner though. Might be a no shirt, no shoes, ghosts, no service,” she joked. Cake? Wait, how did cake figure into it? Okay, that was a question for a little later. Not the time. There was her least favourite word in this kind of context; Google. Hypocritical as that was, she’d done the same thing back before she put her foot down with her parents and got someone that actually knew what they were doing to step in. Ray was a cantankerous jerk that first day, but he knew his stuff. Saved her getting fried anyway. “Google kind of sucks for anything with ghosts. First removal invocation I looked up there had a chunk of it missing,” she admitted. “I was twenty-two and stupid,” she made a brief grimace, “good thing I asked somebody else or I wouldn’t be talking to you. Looks like something might’ve worked, don’t think your friend has been hanging around here all that long. What did this spell on google look like?” Cassie asked, curious now. Maybe it was some sort of banishment circle gone wrong, like they’d copied it wrong, got the opposite effect. Who knew at this point.

“Yeah, I guess it’s hard to call that living, huh?” Morgan said. “Home-sweet-not-home it is.” They continued the journey together, and Morgan told her everything she could about the spell. She had recognized one of the sigls as something she’d seen in an invocation book. She couldn’t remember what the book had said it was for exactly, but the sighting had given her hope. The plan had been to harness the energy of familiarity to reach out to other spirits who had that energy in common. So, her birthday, the land where the people she was looking for had lived, and a birthday cake, which commemorated the continuation of her family. A little fire, a few words, a little saliva to create a taste of life and boom, call made, familial tether climbed, ancestors summoned. She hadn’t noticed or felt anything different at the time. She had assumed she had done something wrong, or supernatural google wasn’t quite on par with her needs as she’d hoped. She showed Cassie a screenshot and went on. She was trying to get in touch with some ancestors. She had some unfinished business with them, funny, right? Only her magical department wasn’t so much in parting the veils or whatever as it was turning stuff into different stuff. As they neared the Traveler’s Rest, she fished around in her pocket for her old set of keys. She plopped them onto her pop socket and gestured. The keys shaped themselves into a metal cuff, a robot figurine. She made it float before coaxing the metal back into keys again. “Neat, right?”

Morgan’s things were splayed all over her room, two large suitcases worth, seemingly made larger by the cramped space. Morgan cleared a spot in the middle of the floor. “I have some Arizona Tea in the mini fridge if you want any. But why not first things first? How do we talk to my visitor friend?”

They were keys. They were keys and then they weren’t and then they were in the air. Then they were keys again and that’s the moment life stopped making sense for a second.

Neat, right?

That was one word for it. Cassie couldn’t even nod, just stood there in stunned silence and stared at the keys in Morgan’s hand as she opened the door out and stepped inside. Talking about that kind of thing was once thing, but seeing it in front of her? Whole different ball game. “…Sounds-sounds, yeah,” she found herself saying, her voice sounding a little far away. Reality snapped back again with a bang and she remembered what she was even there for. Right, focus. The way Morgan had been talking and judging from the picture she saw it sounded more and more like a variation of a banishment circle. An inverted one maybe. First thing was first, making contact.

“Oh, that part’s easy,” right, get it together. The solution to that particular snag was simple. “One second,” Cassie dug out a pen and a scrap of paper and scrawled down the alphabet and placed it on the nearest flat surface she could find. “Just needed some quiet first.”

Thank you Stranger Things, Cassie stepped back and addressed the mystery guest, “if you want to just point to tell me what your-” she didn’t get to finish that sentence before the figure darted to the paper and the pen laying beside it. They jabbed their hand in an attempt to move the Biro and watched as they seemed to grow frustrated in their attempts. Wow, they really were weak. Usually most ghosts could conjure up just enough energy to move a biro a couple centimetre across a page for all of ten seconds. “Or, if you want, you can just point. If it’s easier,” seemed they took that as a challenge and the pen started to shift, “…Okay,” she gestured, giving the go-ahead and waited as they pointed over to each letter.

W.A.N.T….F.R...

Cassie turned back to Morgan once she figured out the gist of it. “They want to know what you want,” when they started up again.

L.E.T.G.O

Oh. Fuck. Morgan took all of her attempts to get in touch with the dead very seriously, it was kind of a matter of life and death at this point, but whatever she had hoped for at the end of each attempt, it didn’t look anything like this. Cassie was sitting with a freaking piece of paper from a notebook and a ballpoint pen, nothing special or consecrated, just practical. And it was moving. Moving all by itself. It was shaking, like the hand holding it was too upset or too weak to hold it together properly. Morgan shifted away from it on the floor. Seeing this invisible force want things, demand things, show--feeling made her uncomfortable in a way she didn’t want to unpack. Wasn’t that what they had always been? And what did it really change about what she needed anyway?

“Um, okay,” she breathed, keeping her voice steady with effort. “That’s nice. Good to know. Sorry you’ve been...here, for so long. But I am going to need some information from you first before we can do that. Okay?” She squared her shoulders back and tried to adopt the kind of voice she used on her freshmen college students. “Now, who are you? What’s your name?”

Watching Morgan move away from the sheet of paper as though it was contagious Cassie realised, she had forgotten how this kind of thing might look to an outsider. What was grade school stuff to her was the stuff of nightmares to somebody else. She recognised that weird waxy looking shade Morgan had paled to and Should’ve just asked them to point. Tell, don’t show this time.

Cassie offered Morgan a look of encouragement as the mystery guest responded, Floor’s all your,s and looked over to their guest who listened and inclined their head as if they were studying her. They folded their arms over for a few moments before answering as thought they were a few moments away from doing the opposite and b an ass. Cassie shot them a look and looked at Morgan again then as the pen began to move again. A lot less stable than before as they slowly spelled the words out.

S.E.A.N…B.A.C.H.M.A.N

Okay, now they were getting somewhere. They had a name. “This your guy?” Cassie asked. She still didn’t understand what she did, but recognising that whatever it was it had worked somehow.

...E.T....G.O…C.A.L.L.E.D…H.E.R.E…..A.P.O.L.O.G.I.Z

Cassie frowned at that last message and now it was her turn to look at the figure, Sean, she corrected herself, her head inclining.

“Ooh! Sean! You’re Agnes’ nephew, right? Your dad was named Abel?” Not who Morgan was looking for, not even close, and she shook her head at Cassie in a sheepish universal signal of ‘close but no cigar.’ Still, she felt an electric rush of excitement. This was more direct contact than she’d gotten...ever. Ever-ever. The rest of his message was a lot more puzzling. Who was apologizing? Sean hadn’t done anything wrong, at least not that she’d dug up yet. “We’ll get to that Sean, but I’m wondering if you know anything about your aunt? If she...kept a secret book of magic maybe? Or if you saw her, or heard maybe…” Fuck it. “If you heard of her doing something bad enough that might make someone curse our whole family?” She felt cold all over and out of breath just from asking. She’d been nosing around ancestry sites and state records for so long, she had picked up her whole life, she had pestered Cassie in the middle of a shop, all for this, all without putting her finger on the big, awful magic button of a reason. And having to ask it out loud now, even in the most common sense of ways frustrated Morgan. It was a reminder that there was a chance the answer might be no. Maybe the afterlife had turned Sean’s memory to custard, or he just hadn’t been the kind of kid to overhear rumor. “Anything, Sean?” She pressed. “Be honest.”

Success? Cassie looked over expectantly and clocked the expression on Morgan’s face and felt her shoulders slump slightly. No, crap. That had to sting. So close, she actually had somebody here and judging by the look that passed her features they’d missed the mark by a few miles.

I’m wondering if you know anything about your aunt?

Y.E.S

The pen continued to move and while Cassie had next to zero to compare this it seemed like who Morgan had got hold sounded like they were a family member. Close, right? Cassie sat back and kept watch and listened as Morgan reached out to Sean. Her eyes darted up again at Morgan’s words at the end there. Eyebrows raised in concern. Cursed?

…O.W…D.A.R.E...

“Just answer the question and you can be on your way. Come on, man.” It was round about then that Sean decided to have a temper tantrum and managed to tear the paper a few centimetres in his answer. It seemed to take it out of him. She saw him fade further and stop .“I think he wore himself out with that one.” It was a while before he summoned up the energy to fade back to view again.

…T.E.L.L….Y.O.U….N.O.T.H.I

The light on one of the bedside tables clinked and the TV switched on and off for a second at that outburst.

….R.E.L.E.A.S.E….ME…

What a baby. “Spooky. Very good,” Cassie shook her head and spoke in a deadpan tone. “I know you’re pissed but don’t be an ass, Sean, or we’re going to have a problem.”

Morgan clenched her fists in her lap to keep from shaking. This was getting very real, very quickly, and somehow not at all fulfilling in the way she’d hoped. The paper was making noises all by itself, and it was one thing to look away from the screen when things started getting weird in The Conjuring, but something else entirely when the jump scare was right in front of your face. There was nowhere to go from this. Morgan looked behind her and saw the TV flickering, like some five year old on a sugar high was going crazy with the switch, and the tables were rattling louder without anyone being there. Morgan’s eyes had been stretched open long enough to tear up. She was sure if she closed them she’d make up some excuse for what she was seeing, she’d try to tell herself that this was wrong and definitely impossible. But the only thing scarier than seeing this happen, was to never see it happen. Fuck.

“Sean, you asshole! Cut it out!” She screamed over the noise. “You tell me what you know!”

But Sean was not remotely interested. Morgan felt down in her pocket to the salt stash she had and threw it near the paper.

“You wanna stay here forever, Sean?” She asked. “Because I don’t give a shit if you’re stuck with me forever, okay! You can throw a fit all year for all I care, got it? So spit it out already!”

Cassie shot Sean’s general figure an exasperated look and turned to Morgan and frowned in confusion. Where was he getting this idea he wasn’t free to go here? She really wasn’t about to enlighten them any time soon. Looking at Morgan just as the ‘I want to speak to the manager theatrics’ flared up again she saw Morgan glance around looking rattled. Crap. She knew that look. Cassie saw the clenched fists and shot her a worried look.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Cassie reached over but paused when she realised then that it wasn’t all fear there. There was some anger bubbling under the surface and stopped, sitting back down beside the paper. “Just some grade school level theatrics. He couldn’t blow the fuse on a lightbulb,” Cassie shot Sean a glare. Was it really so hard for the douche to just give Morgan what she wanted so they could just drop kick him back to the beyond like he wanted here? “And if you do, I’m going to have some words you’re not going to like.” Turned out the reassurance really wasn’t needed here. Morgan was holding her own. More than; she was outright making demands, tossing salt she didn’t even remember she had on her at the paper. Fast learner.

You can throw a fit all year for all I care, got it? So spit it out already

“What she said,” Cassie shrugged and looked for a second at the salt Morgan had just tossed in Sean’s general direction, “and if she thinks about throwing any more of that there’s not a damn thing I’m doing to do to stop her. I’ll tell her where to aim. Your call.”

S.K….C.O.N.S.T.A.N.C.E…L.E.A.V.E….M.E

The pen moved, with urgency then, spelling out a name. Now, that wasn’t to hard, was it?

Morgan came back to herself with Cassie’s agreement, what she said. Oh. Shit. She’d really let loose there. Threatened her ancestor, even if he was kind of a dick, wasted some salt aiming at whichever part of the air had looked most threatening. Cassie, for her part, didn’t seem too upset about her seasoning the ghost, and Morgan didn’t know what to make of that, except that she would have to explain a lot more about her situation than she’d had to in a long time. But that could wait. Hopefully. Sean was telling them about...someone named Constance. Morgan couldn’t remember how she fit into her family story off the top of her head. Was she Constance’s mother? Her daughter? It was right on the edge of her recall, but she couldn’t reach it. But it was better than nothing.

“Fine,” she said flatly. “Fine, go.” She still had some salt in her hand and threw it again. “Fuck you anyway, though. And tell Constance I’m coming for her.” She turned to Cassie for help, holding her sweater close around her chest, flushed with embarrassment.

Cassie watched as Morgan threw the remainder of salt in her hand towards the paper again, but something strange happened in the seconds before the salt even went airborne. Cassie didn’t get the chance to even start to send him away. There second Morgan uttered the word go the ghost that was formerly known as Sean zapped out like an old television. Blipped back to the void as if being pulled back somewhere. “That was new,” was all she could manage then with raised eyebrows. “He’s already gone,” she clarified, shaking herself out of it. What the hell was that?

“Okay,” she spoke again eventually as the quiet descended. “I have no idea what you did,” she admitted, still processing, “but that’s uh, that’s different.” Understatement, the air shifted, she felt that much. Swore she heard a faint popping sound as they went. “Did you get what you wanted? Sort of anyway? A name is a start, right?” Cassie shifted back and let out a breath. “So, um, walk me through what you did here, with the circle. Maybe we can get somebody else.”

Morgan flopped back on the floor when Cassie said he was gone. She didn’t know how she could tell, and without anything to tell by she almost didn’t believe it. This...this was good, right? This was progress...in that it was more ghost she’d spoken to in her whole life, certainly more than she had gotten out of any of her magic experiments. She would have to find out who Constance was, what she had to with all this. Agnes had been the one everyone talked about, but maybe she was just the baby monster. Oh god, if this was going to turn into a Grendel’s Mother situation-- Morgan put her head in her hands and breathed out long and hard. One thing at a time. “I um...I can send you the stuff. I have the webpage saved, but I don’t know if I can do it again, without some meaningful date and a new moon, or maybe not, maybe that was bullshit…” she was mumbling, half in a daze, as she pawed around the messy floor for her computer. She pulled it up and sent it to Cassie’s account on the town social media network. Handy, that. She stood up and dusted off a whole lot of nothing off her jeans. “I got something alright!” She said, scrambling to put her smile back on. “Thank you for helping on short notice. You’re really nice, and I’ll find a way to make it up somehow. Maybe when, um, the adrenaline is a little, uh, less, we can figure something out.” Or not. Cassie seemed like she might make a good shortcut through the mess, but she might also be fast-tracking herself into the danger zone. But if it meant not running from herself anymore, maybe it would be worth it anyway.

#an in spectre calls #wr cassie #wr chatzy #wr cassie chatzy #//ghost stufff!!!!

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surveys-at-your-service · 5 years ago

Text

Survey #216

“cocaine in a crucifix, say your prayers, take your licks.”

How much money is in your wallet right now? Not a lot. Maybe like $10. What’s the last thing you purchased from the store? Me myself? No idea. Have you ever seen the movie Mean Girls? If so, did you think it was funny? Yeah, it's a nice movie. What do you usually get on your sub at Subway? Ham, American cheese, bacon, banana peppers, pickles, and Chipotle sauce. I think that's it. Is your bed made right now? Do you usually make your bed, or does someone make it for you? I'm in my bed. I always am. Have you ever had a crush of one of your friends’ brothers/sisters? No. Do you take naps often? I take one most days. Are you an only child? If not, do you get annoyed by your siblings a lot? No, and they don't annoy me, but then again, I live with none of them. What’s your favorite Disney movie? The Lion King. Does it take you a while to fall asleep? Ugh. Too long. Do you watch TV before you go to sleep? No. Do you listen to music every day? It's very rare I don't. If you could have ANYTHING in the world right now, what would it be? To be satisfied with where I am in life. Do you still watch Spongebob Squarepants? No. I don't not enjoy it, you know I just don't watch television. What kind of bottled water do you drink? Mom buys big jugs of some Great Value-esque or whatever brand. Do you collect stuff someone else would consider junk? If so, then what? No. What's the most your electricity bill has ever reached? Idk, I don't pay it. How much was your tax refund this year or did you pay? N/A How are the kids doing? I don't have any. Do you see a bright light at the end of your tunnel? Just being realistic, not deliberately depressing or anything, I don't know. I could have a very dull and unsuccessful life or a thriving and happy one. What's the most you’ve ever lost gambling? Don't gamble. Have you ever waited in line overnight for something? No. How many concerts have you attended? One. Do you think having an expensive phone is a good investment? To a certain high price, no. So long you can call and text easily and reliably, I don't find it necessary to buy a $500 or whatever phone. Any tattoos? How many do you need or want to cover up? I have six. I'm getting my "ohana" one covered at some point, and I'm going to have "perfectly flawed" tatted over as well; I just want to move it elsewhere, considering I want something else where it already is. How many funerals have you attended? One or two. Have you lost anyone your age to death? No one that I was especially close to, thankfully. Have you ever witnessed a birth in person? Not a human one, thank Christ. I've seen cats give birth many times, and maybe other animals, but I'm not sure. What gender do you identify with? Female. What’s your opinion on astrology? It's total, ridiculous bullshit. Are you more of a science or math person? I'm clueless in math, while science makes sense to me and is far more interesting. What religion/spirituality do you identify with, if any? Theism. I think something made the universe, but I don't pretend to know jackshit about him/her/them/it. What is your opinion on peanut butter & banana sandwiches? I like them every now and again. What is your favorite book that was turned into a movie? The Outsiders, probably. Do you like the movie or the book better? This was so long ago that I honestly don't remember either well... so I really dunno. If you identify as a girl, would you ever consider getting a pixie cut? Yeah. If you identify as a boy, would you ever consider growing your hair out? N/A Are you a metalhead? I guess I mostly fit the definition, but I don't like labeling myself as such considering honestly, the metalhead community tends to have such a "that's not heavy enough" attitude and ridicule anything less than their interests and treat those that like softer metal as outcasts and/or posers. Not even trying to stereotype; befriend or observe people in this category and you'll see what I mean. Do you even listen to metal? Hell yes. Do you watch porn? No. If you don’t, do you have a moral reasoning behind that decision? I just find it... very strange. I don't see the appeal of watching. That's just something I want between me and my partner, you know? Like if you watch it, good for you, so long your s/o (if applicable) is aware and fine with it, but it ain't for me. Do you know anybody who is a Wiccan or Pagan? Yesssss, she's cool as fuck. I need to reconnect with her more. Do/did you ever attend church regularly? I did as a kid. Do you have a godmother/godfather/both? I have no clue. Do you listen to Supertramp? I have no clue who that is. Do you watch Supernatural? Not anymore. I think I stopped at the end of Season 6. What’s your favorite character in your favorite TV show? That '70s Show, probably Hyde. I love and relate to Eric, though. Honestly I love every single character; they're very unique to each other and recognizable with strong personalities. Both Fullmetal Alchemist iterations, most likely Edward. Or possibly one of the Sins, but I don't remember them all well... Oh. I know I loved Envy, for one. Are you wearing any rings right now? Yeah, my Supernatural friendship ring w/ Sara. Calling each other "bitch"/"jerk" between Sam and Dean is a thing in the show, so I have one that says "bitch" on the interior, and Sara has "jerk." Bracelets? Yes, also the one Sara gave me. Necklaces? No. Anklets? No. Chokers/collars? No. Do you go to a firework show every 4th of July? No. Are you diabetic? No. I'm forever proud of that considering it runs heavily in my family, yet even at my worst weight, I didn't develop it. But more importantly, a recent blood test I had for my thyroid or something showed I don't have any indicators of even coming close/being at any risk at this point in time. Are you allergic to gluten? No. Are you lactose intolerant? No. What is your favorite fruit? Strawberries, yum. Your favorite vegetable? Broccoli. Do you live with your parents? I live with my mom. Have you written a formal essay lately? Not in years. How much experience do you have written down on your resume, approximately? I don't have a resume currently, but if I did, it'd only have two months as a sales associate as my other two jobs were so short-lived it'd be stupid to add, especially when you consider the obvious fact that would make me look awful. How long have you had the shirt you’re wearing? A year. What happened last time you got drunk? N/A When’s the last time you straightened your hair? I have zero clue. Do you bite your toe nails? Wtf no. Last time you laughed your head off? Idr. Do you find piercings attractive? Yeah. Did you accept or reject your last friend request? I rejected it. Had no clue who it was, even though we had quite a handful of mutuals. How many cigarettes have you smoked today? N/A Do you have a hard time admitting you’re wrong? It depends on what the subject of the matter is. Do you like potato chips? Is there a human that doesn't???? Do you give out second chances way too easily? Yes. Ever stayed up all night on the phone? Not all night, no. There was one night Jason and I were up a long time talking, but it wasn't all night. What are you excited for? SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Have you ever shoplifted? No. If you have shoplifted, are you afraid of getting in trouble? And are you afraid to go back in that store? N/A Have you ever gotten caught shoplifting? If yes, what happened? N/A Have you ever plotted revenge against someone? No. Are you mad at someone right now? Nah. Have you ever egged someone’s house? Fuck no, because I'm not a dick. If not, have you ever WANTED to egg someone’s house? No. Have you ever wanted to kill someone? I was fucking psychotic when I found out Jason was in a new relationship after we broke up. For a long time I wanted her dead. Are you glad you don’t own a gun, because of what you might do with it? Quite honestly, yes. I'm impulsive on bad days, and I don't entirely cross out the possibility of me shooting myself on an awful day. Do you avoid people when they’ve hurt you? Yes. Do you make the most of every opportunity? No. Are you honestly succeeding at life, or failing? Failing miserably at most things. What does your newest journal look like? I don't remember the last time I got a journal. Is there anything you currently want but can’t have? A lot of things. Do you have no one you can trust? No, thankfully. Do you like meatball subs? No, they're so messy. Are you severely sleep deprived? No. What music are you listening to? "LA Devotee" by P!ATD just came on. If you go to school (HS or college), does your school have a rival? N/A What’s your school’s mascot? N/A If you have a sib, do you call him/her “brother” or “sister” sometimes? No. Do you own a Wii? If not, do you want one? Yes. Are there any songs you could just listen to over and over and over? No. I get tired of a song after around 100 repeats. No, I'm not kidding. Before you could loop YT vids (or anyway, before I was aware), I used a website that repeated the video for you and kept track of the repeats. Do you have a favorite basketball team (NBA or college?) No. Have you been baptized in any religious tradition? Yes. If your best male friend got a mohawk, would he look good or ridiculous? Save Him. What did you have for breakfast? A PopTart. What kind of booze did you last take shots of? I've never taken a shot. Have you slept over at a member of the opposite sex’s house in their bed? Yeah, but we were dating. Who last slept in your bed besides you? Sara. If the last person you had sex with asked you to date them, would you? No. What color is your car? (Or the one you drive most often) White. How long have you been single? (Or dating your current interest) Sara and I have been together a year and ten months. Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you that you were sexy? Yeah. Do you own any books written by musicians? Yeah, Ozzy's autobiography. What is your most interesting invention? Probably some RP characters. Have you ever seen someone sleepwalk? Once. Have you ever thought about getting your tongue pierced? It is pierced. When you’re bored in class, what do you usually do? N/A yet. Do you like your phone? NO. Honestly, are things going the way you planned? Bitch hell no. Who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts? The woman who adopted Kaiju. I miss him, damn. Have you ever snuggled with someone you weren’t dating? No. Do you know a James? I knew one years ago. If you had to choose to have a different accent than the one you have now, what accent would you choose and why? British. It sounds sophisticated and just generally attractive to me. Have you ever or do you currently live in a Gated Community? I don't and never have. Do you know how to use a DSLR camera? Yeah. Have you ever owned an Axolotl? No, but they cute. What has been the longest amount of time you’ve spent on a plane? I actually don't know. Probably just around two hours. How often do you use Snapchat? I don't have one/never had. Have you ever adopted an animal from an animal shelter? Yes. Where do you usually find surveys from? Tumblr, and if I'm desperate, LiveJournal. Have you ever missed a flight? Yep. The airport biz took WAY longer than any of us expected. What is your favorite film from your childhood? The Lion King. I think it's always been my fave, honestly, I just never really thought about JUST HOW MUCH I love the film and its story since I was a kid. Do you know anyone who is named after a state? Uhhh I know at least one Caroline, and that's close enough? Jason's mom's name is a state, too. What was the reason for your previous doctor’s visit? I was getting a full blood panel done to check my thyroid. Have you ever been to an outdoor cinema? No. Well, my elementary school and church used to do these "movies on the lawn" type things where they used a huge projector to play a movie outside around late evening, but I don't know if that counts. Have you ever had a “bad trip”? If yes, what happened? N/A How often do you use Instagram? I usually check it once a day or two to follow certain celebs' stories 'n shit. Have you ever smoked a cigarette? If so, do you still smoke? No. Adam Sandler or Jim Carrey? Jim. Do you enjoy learning about conspiracy theories? If so, what is your favorite? Y'all know I love me some conspiracies. My favorite - as in most interesting, not that I seriously believe in it - is the one that our current reality is just a simulation from a "future" civilization for study or just play purposes. It's interesting to think about with alarming evidence. Elon Musk 100% believing in it puts more "hey this might actually be worth considering" into it, but I think I lean more towards it being false. It's not something I think about much though as I have THE most Detroit: Become Human mindset about it ever, lmao. It just doesn't matter to me. Wow, what a ramble. Do you find hand tattoos attractive on your preferred sex? I find tattoos (usually) attractive in general, so like- What is your favorite Netflix original series? I have no clue what's Netflix-exclusive. I don't watch it. Have you ever owned a Tamagotchi? Yep, or at least something similar to it. My sister especially loved those little things. Do you have a favorite “survey blog” on Tumblr? If so, who? Dunno if tagging random people in surveys is annoying, so I'll break the link, but @/thedarkeststarsurveys seems super cool and nice. Would you rather be able to control fire or water? Probably fire for self-defense purposes, and I just like fire. Water seems... overall pretty useless to control, unless you can like, manifest it. Then you could solve a world of problems. Have you ever used your phone in class or at work without anyone knowing? Actually no. Have you ever been to Canada? No. What is your favorite condiment to put on fries? Ketchup. Do any famous people follow you on Twitter or Instagram? Definitely not to my knowledge, but I highly doubt it. Do you usually take the stairs or the elevator? Elevator. Even though I'm scared of them. Stairs and my horrible knees don't mix. What salads do you usually get on your Subway order? None. Have you ever made your own cocktails at home? Not myself. My old friend did. Have you seen all the Star Wars films? I watched the first three disinterestedly with Girt once, and neither of us liked them. I didn't get the appeal at all. Do you own any shirts with funny words or pictures on them? Yeah. Are your eyes the same color they were when you were a baby? They were more blue. Do you take the pickle off your burgers? No. Who do you share your bathroom with? Anyone else in the house. What color is your bed frame? Brown. Have you ever kissed someone you met that day? No. Do you share a bed with anyone? No. Well, excluding Roman and sometimes Teddy. Name all the people you know that you’ve seen today. My mom. When a car cuts you off, is the driver a jerk or is there an explanation? "Most of the time the driver is a jerk." <<< Yep. What are your thoughts on cosmetic surgery? You do you, boo. Has a man/woman ever broke your heart? If so, have you recovered? Yes, and yes as well as a PTSD victim can; your brain is literally changed after trauma, and considering I still have dreams/nightmares about him very regularly and he suddenly crosses my mind literally every single day despite never wanting to think about him, I don't think you could consider me totally recovered. Name a few things that make you really happy. Really happy? Being with Sara, Mark doing so much as blinking, long car rides with my music blaring way too loud, finding a new song and binging it for hours, a mount dropping in WoW goddamn y'all I have over 300, being complimented on my photography (or like... anything), my niece and/or nephew saying they love me or anything along those lines without being prompted (ex. when leaving, that kinda stuff), going to Olive Garden 'cuz breadsticks and spicy shrimp fritas lol, finishing a drawing and actually liking the result, getting Venus out and she acts like a cuddlebug the whole time, uh... other stuff that isn't coming to me. What’s your favorite type of sushi? Never tried it, don't want to. Have you ever read a book about a character in a psych ward? I don't think so. Have you ever been in a mental hospital as a patient? Too many times fuck but those days done fam. Do you take birth control pills? Currently for taming the pain and symptoms of my cycle, but it's hopefully changing to a longer, better solution soon to just totally eliminate it to remove its effects on my mood entirely for mental health tracking purposes. When’s the last time you got a new outfit? I don't buy full outfits. Do you have an imaginary best friend? (i.e., someone you wish was your best friend but currently isn’t) No. Do you like soy sauce? NO. Do you have a good doctor? I haven't had her long, but she's nice and seems knowledgeable. What’s your favorite store to browse around? Whew, Hot Topic my friends. Do you ever meditate on Scripture? No. Do you like poetry? Yeah. What’s the name of the most recent baby a friend had? Dawson. Do you have expensive tastes? Definitely not. What is your dream job? Meerkat biologist or paleontologist. What is your favorite music style currently? I've been digging power metal a lot lately. I like, live off of Powerwolf. I've been wanting to find more symphonic metal I enjoy, too... Are you wearing comfortable clothes right now? Yeah. Is there a bad habit you’re trying to break right now? Yeah, rather just keep it quiet. Is it easy to find a job in your preferred field in your home town? Fuck. No. When is the last time you went to a fun fair? ~August 2015. I remember it because it happened pretty shortly before the breakup. How about an amusement park? I have zero clue. Probably not since I went to Disney World as a child. Ladies: Would you ever consider proposing? If not, why not? If I'm with a woman, yes. I don't really have a proper reason why I wouldn't if I was with a man... I have NO problem with women proposing to men, I just think I'd personally feel weird. Oh, that makes sense; the fact of how I am with men - scared and doubtful - probably says a good deal. I'd want to see "oh wow he actually wants to be with me so much he's asking himself." Gentlemen: How would you feel, if you were proposed to? N/A Have you ever played the original Mass Effect trilogy? No. If so, which Shepard and who do you like romancing the best? N/A Let’s say there’s a person in need. They need money which they can’t make. Would you be more likely to help them out, if a celebrity asked you to? "Tbh right now I’m not really in a position to help anyone out financially. But hypothetically if I had the money to do so, some celebrity’s opinion wouldn’t matter." <<< This. When you go to a restaurant, do you have a go-to dish? Pretty much always. I don't tend to try new foods. Or do you always try out something new? ^ No. Would you rather live next to a kindergarten or an old folks’ home? Holy fuck, the latter. Living next to a school, esp. elementary, might even be a deal-breaker as far as buying a house goes. I'm not dealing with the noise and traffic. What was the last game that you played? I'm "playing" World of Warcraft currently, waiting for a stupid dinosaur to spawn to be denied a mount again. :^) What do you know about Finland? Nothing. Where was the postcard from that traveled the longest way to you? I don't think I've ever gotten a postcard. Have you ever made jewelry? Besides like those bead, "friendship," and plastic bracelets that were popular in the early 2000s, no. Which app do you use the most on your phone? Uhhhh I think Facebook? I don't use apps much. Did you learn to play an instrument as a kid? If so, which one? Recorders in elementary school and then flute in middle school-junior year in high school. What is the best part of your most ordinary day? Mark uploading cries. What’s your dad’s hair color? It's almost entirely gray now, but it's naturally black. Who was the last person you heard sing? Myself, I think. Surprisingly. Do you bite your lips a lot? My bottom one, occasionally. Have you ever dated someone with tattoos? For less than a day. Did you donate to Haiti? No. I've never had a source of stable income. Are your parents rich? BITCH- What’s your mom’s job? She's a pharmacy tech. Have you ever thrown up in public? Yes. In the middle of my 1st grade class lmaaaoooo. Have you ever failed gym in school? No. Are you scared of dogs? Nope. What reality show would you like to be in? None. What TV show makes you laugh? Most consistently, That '70s Show. Doesn't matter that I've seen I think every episode multiple times, I still laugh so easily at it. Family Feud gets me good too, if it's Steve Harvey hosting it. Have you ever heard of Joe Purdy? If so, do you like his music? Never heard of 'im. What is the saddest movie you’ve ever seen? Probably Johnny Got His Gun. Would you ever wear real fur? Fuck no. Who do you envy and why? Successful people. Because I'm the polar opposite. What color is the house you live in? Khaki. Which one of your friends is most likely to be famous one day? Why? Probablyyyy... Shannen. She is phenomenal at photography and already employed in NY with a fashion company for it. I am unbelievably envious of her, too, but also very happy. She deserves it. Do you have a favorite cousin? No. I rarely ever see my cousins, and if I do, it's usually just two. What is the worst present you have ever gotten? I've never gotten a "bad" gift. I appreciate the thought behind anything. Like I've gotten things entirely unrelated to me, but I still appreciate them. Who was it from? N/A Who is your favorite author? Don't have one. Do you shave your arms? No.

#survey #quiz #questions #random #bored

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lovemesomesurveys · 5 years ago

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S/O to @iaintgotcontrol for finding a new survey! lol.

Looks and Personality

What do you look like? I have a face with freckles, brown eyes, a nose, and a mouth. I wear black rimmed glasses. I have long hair that goes past my butt. I naturally have dark brown hair, but I dye it red. I’m thin. Gangly. How often do you bathe? I don’t take baths, but I shower every 1-2 days. How do you wear your hair? In a pony tail.

What colours do you tend to wear? I have a lot of black and gray with pops of other colors. Do you have any tattoos? What, where and why? No.

What kind of clothes do you wear? Comfy, casual clothes. I’m always in leggings and a comfy shirt. I own a LOT of leggings and graphic T’s. What kind of jewellery do you wear? I haven’t worn any in years. I used to wear these 3 rings I have 24/7 until one day I took them off for some reason and just never put them back on since. That was probably like 5 years ago. I went through a phase where I was all about accessorizing and wore a ton of bracelets. I wore necklaces and earrings, too. Is there anything else you often wear? I’m always wearing socks. Would you say you had a “look”? I’ve gone through different phases like the preppy/girly and emo phase, but now I’m just very casual and comfy. When going out, do you dress up or down? My going out consists of going to the doctor, the movies, or Walmart. I don’t dress up for any of those things. What do you wear to bed at home? Those comfy, causal clothes I’ve been talking about. What do you wear to bed when your somewhere else? Same thing. Is there a place you keep any prized/secret things whilst you’re away? No. What’s your favourite food? Chicken tenders, boneless chicken wings (garlic parm), burritos, potatoes in various forms, eggs, spaghetti, meatballs, and pesto pasta. What’s your favourite drink? Coffee. What’s your favourite desert? Donuts, cupcakes, muffins. What’s your favourite type of food (e.g Mexican)? American, Italian, and Mexican. Do you have any mental problems? Yes. Do you have any phobias? What? Why do you think you have this/them? Yes. Why might somebody dislike you? Because I keep to myself these days and have been very distant and withdrawn from everyone outside of my immediate family. I’m very moody. I don’t put any effort into maintaining friendships anymore. Or any effort into much of anything. I haven’t been a good friend at all to the friends I used to have. What skill do you possess that you are most proud of? I don’t feel like I have any. What is your greatest strength (e.g. honest, loyal, brave)? I... don’t know. What’s your greatest shortcoming or flaw (e.g. cowardly, alcoholic)? I have a lot of those. Who do you most admire? My mom and younger brother. Who do you most love? My family. What three things do you look for most in a partner? Good sense of humor, understanding, patient. Do you like crowds? Nooo. I don’t well with crowds. What are your hobbies? Tumblr/surveys, watching YouTube, coloring, reading, watching TV. If you can’t get to sleep in the middle of the night, what do you do? So every night? At night I do my Bible study, watch YouTube, watch TV, and read. What is your favourite animal? Dogs and giraffes. What is your favourite colour? Pastels. If you could ask God (to athiests - IF there was one) one question, what? I mean, there’s a lot I’d like to know but some things we aren’t meant to know or are beyond our comprehension. Things will be revealed when they’re meant to, if they’re meant to be. Rate yourself on these traits from 0 to 10. 0 - do not possess this trait. 10 - you have great amounts of this trait. Calm temper Charm Cheerfulness Confidence Courtesy Curiousity Forgiveness Generosity Greed Helpfulness Honesty Loyalty Optimism Patience Self-sacrafice Wit Background Where were you born and raised? California. Briefly describe your family. Loving, supportive, encouraging, funny. You must choose one - your childhood was calm/peaceful or tragic/turbulent? Calm and peaceful out of these choices. I had obstacles and struggles with health related things, but honestly those aren’t what stick out the most to me. I was a very resilient, strong kid. I’m a very weak, scared adult. Did you have any rolemodels? My mom and grandma. What is the worst thing that has ever happened to you? I’d say the incident that made me a paraplegic at 7 months old takes home the trophy for that category. How did it affect you? In every single way from that day forward. Have you ever had any recurring nightmares or themes in nightmares? Yes. As a kid I remember one of the reoccurring nightmares I had was Ghostface chasing me with a knife. I was so scared of Scream for the longest, but I love the movies now. ha. What were they? Death and being chased. Do you currently have a boyfriend/girlfriend? No. Do you have any close friends? I have my family. Briefly describe your best friend: My mom is so strong-willed and hardworking. Very giving. Very outgoing and social. She’s also very funny and sarcastic. She loves her some ID (Investigative Discovery) and Game of Thrones. Any enemies? No. Who? What are they like? Would you risk your life for your best friend?(not lover or family member!) My best friend is a family member, though. And yes. With who was your most important romantic relationship? I haven’t had a serious relationship. Of what are you most proud? :/ Of what are you most ashamed? The person I’ve become over the last 4 years. I really hate this person I’ve become. Alignment, Ethics and Religion What is your religion? Christian. Where do you stand on abortion? Where do you stand on the death penalty? I’m on the fence. Where do you stand on wearing fur? I don’t wear fur or use real leather. Do you have a moral code that you follow? What? I mean, yes? Could you kill somebody? I can’t ever imagine myself being able to do that, but it’s something you don’t really know unless you find yourself in a situation that could lead to that. For what reason would you kill somebody? The only reason I could think of is self-defense, but even then I still can’t imagine killing someone. Would you SERIOUSLY CONSIDER killing anybody right now? No, sheesh. Do you trust easily, or not? Trust isn’t a big issue with me, I just have a hard time opening up and expressing myself to people and sharing my feelings. What are your political beliefs (anarchy, communism, democracy etc.)? What, if anything, WOULD you sacrifice your life for? If it meant saving a loved one. Would you ever, for any reason, abandon your friends in an hour of need? That’s what I’ve done over these last few years. :( Motivation

What are your dreams/ambitions/goals? That’s the problem... I don’t have any. How do you plan to reach them? How would your ideal partner look? Not say looks don’t matter at all, but I’m more concerned with personality.

Do you ever want to have a family someday? With children? I can’t see that happening. Who would you want to start this family with, or do you not yet know? What would stop you from reaching your goals (e.g. death, retirement fund)? My health. What do you see yourself doing next year? I have to take it day by day, hour by hour, man. What do you see yourself doing in twenty years? Yikes. Would you ever have an affair? No, I truly don’t think so. Would you ever have a one night stand? No. What are your greatest fears? Losing my loved ones. More information If you had a month of nothing (no work, no obligations) what would you do? That’s been my life for the past few years and it hasn’t been a good thing. It dug me in a deep hole for depression. How do you relax? Listen to ASMR. What one thing would you change in this world (free Tibet, abolish Sweden)? No more violence. Would you ever choose a career or job where your life was at risk? No. Why? How would you like to be remembered after your death? “When my time comes, forget the wrong that I’ve done, help me leave behind some reasons to be missed.” Random questions Where you present at any major historical events (e.g. 9/11)? No. How did they affect you? Do you have any famous relatives? No. Do you have to try and live up to your family’s expectations? My family doesn’t put any ridiculous or impossible expectations on me. All they want is for me to be healthy and happy, but for some reason I can’t seem to get my shit together and take care of myself like I should. Are you a loyal member of any organizations? No. General Information Name: Stephanie. Age: 29. Date Of Birth: July 28th. Race: Caucasian, Mexican, and some Filipino that I know of. I really want to do one of those DNA tests to see exactly what I am. Height: I’d be about 5′4. Weight: Mid 70s (lbs). Are you happy with this? No. I need to put on some weight. Desired weight: I used to be mid 80s-low 90s. Sexual orientation: Straight. First language: English. Second/Third/Fourth etc. languages (if any): I’m only fluent in English. Why did you take this survey? I hadn’t taken it before and I wanted to do a survey.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

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woildismyerster · 6 years ago

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hey you should write some jojo x reader fluff where it’s just super lovey dovey “2 kids in love” kinda vibe please please please

Plot????? Who is she???????

“That’s too fast,” you huffed. “I can’t tell what you’re doing.”

“Sorry,” he said with a decidedly guiltless smile. Despite his lack of regret, the swift journey of his fingers slowed to something more reasonable.

He had always had a knack for anything with his hands. As kids, he could braid hair faster and neater than anybody else you knew. The other boys teased him for it, but you thought that maybe it was because they weren’t any good at it. It was easier to tease him than acknowledge that they failed.

He could tie knots that never came undone. He could pick up any magic trick. He was the first to figure out how to tie a tie. He could make flower crowns that stayed in place for hours.

When he kissed you for the first time, his fingers had skated along your jaw and cheekbones so gently that you thought your heart would break.

He had promised to teach you how to make friendship bracelets, but yours was not looking anything like his. His was uniform and lovely - something that you would probably have been willing to buy in a store. You blamed his quick fingers making it hard to watch, but really it was all you. You didn’t have the same easy movements.

“Maybe I’ll knot a heart bead on it and give it to Spot,” JoJo mused.

You laughed. “He would hate it.”

“I’d tie it to his backpack,” he said. “He’d be stuck with it, in plain sight.”

“Why start so small? Take up knitting and make him a sweater. If you learn to make patterns, you could put a heart on it. Or a unicorn.”

“Weasley sweater,” JoJo said with delight. You had been joking, but you wouldn’t put it past him to try it out. If he did, you would bet anything that he excelled at it.

“If you made us sweaters, we would all wear them.” You’d have to, really, but everybody would do it with pride. The idea of all of your friends wearing JoJo’s sweaters made you smile. Race wearing a sweater with a vape pen spewing colorful smoke. Finch with his beloved motorcycle. “What would you put on mine?”

He looked at you thoughtfully. “My face.”

You snorted. “I love it. Might as well put ‘Property of JoJo’ on it.”

“That can go on the back,” he said, leaning over to kiss your temple.

There had never really been a time before the two of you. Before either of you had been old enough to date, you had been best friends. He was the first boy you had ever had a real crush on, and he had never bothered taking his eyes off of you to look for somebody else. He would never call you his property, partially because one person can’t own another, but partially because he didn’t have to worry about you straying. Why would you want somebody else?

You were still focusing on knotting the thread, but you turned your head a little to return his kiss on whatever you could reach. You ended up brushing your lips against the sharp edge of his jaw, under his ear.

During the time it took you to finish, JoJo had made two more bracelets. He could fly through them, quickly knotting or braiding masterpieces without focusing on them. Your bracelet was lumpy and awkward, with the colors randomly distributed in patternless knots. You frowned at it. “Wow.”

“It’s great,” he said, though you could hear the amusement coloring his words.

“It looks like it was made by something without opposable thumbs.”

“Well,” he said, “at least you’re cute.”

The grin on his face warmed you to your toes. “It this supposed to be the opposite of saying you have a great personality? Like, I have no future as a useful person, but at least I look good?”

“Hey, if I could be a trophy spouse, I totally would. That’s the dream.”

“Marrying rich has always been my goal,” you agreed. “Remind me again why I’m dating you?”

He kissed you, quick and sweet, while he traced the line of knots in your bracelet. “I wooed you with daisy chains.”

You nodded solemnly as you tied it around his wrist. “That’s right. The ability to make daisy chains does me in. I knew what a sexy beast you would be someday, even as a six year old.”

When you held out your wrist, he tied all three of his bracelets on. His fingers lingered against the pulse point in your wrist. “Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for the bracelet,” he said. He smiled at it as though it was perfect; like it was everything he had ever hoped for.

“I would tell you that I’ll love you for as long as it stays on,” you said dryly, “but I don’t think the bracelet will last long enough for that. I’ll have to make you a new one every week.”

He hummed thoughtfully. “Every knot on those bracelets is one reason I love you,” he said smugly.

“I can’t top that,” you sighed. “Now you have to name every reason.”

He held your hand, peering at the knots as though the reasons were listed on each one. “This one is because you laugh at my jokes.” He kissed your wrist. “This one is because you never make me feel like I don’t deserve you. I don’t, but you don’t make me feel like it.”

“That is so -” you started to scoff at his words, but he cut you off by kissing the crook of your elbow.

“This one is because you have the best smile in the world.” He kissed your shoulder, and though you thought that his smile was much better, you didn’t fight him. “Because you tell good stories.” The side of your neck.

Each reason was accompanied by a kiss, each one closer and closer to your lips. You thought that he probably could come up with enough reasons if you asked, but by the time he got to your mouth, you didn’t need more. You knew he loved you. You would make him crappy bracelets weekly if it meant that he knew the same of you.

#Newsies #newsies fanfiction #newsies x reader #jojo #jojo newsies #jojo de la guerra #jojo x reader #ally writes

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precuredaily · 6 years ago

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Precure Day 730 (v1)

Episode: HUGtto! Precure 22 - “A song of love for two! Twin Love Guitar!” Date watched: 8 July 2018 Original air date: 1 July 2018 Screenshots: https://imgur.com/a/kfRvK0g

the crossover nobody expected

Hello no you’re not going crazy, I did skip almost 700 days. I mentioned on the status blog that I’d review HUG 22 early specially because it features the FW duo so here we are.

A note about names: after some research I’ve elected to use Ruru and Emiru instead of Lulu and Emile, so if you wonder why I’m writing Ruru when the captions say Lulu, suffice to say I have my reasons.

Here’s the setup, since I won’t actually review the episode this continues on from for another 2 years: in HUGtto! 21, Emiru and Ruru were out at the park, playing guitar when Papple attacked. At one point, Cure Amour (Ruru) is trying to save Emiru’s guitar from being trampled but the Oshimaida stomps down on her. Cure Macherie (Emiru) yells at her to get out of the way, and ultimately jumps in to push her out of danger. Unfortunately her guitar gets stomped and breaks in two. After the main trio swoops in and defeats the monster with Yell For You, Ruru apologizes to Emiru for her destroyed guitar. Emiru replies that it’s okay as long as Ruru is alright and tells her not to worry, and then turns to Yell and states that if they had Melody Swords then this wouldn’t have happened, so Yell should hand hers over. Yell, taken aback by this, tells her that these wands are theirs so Emiru turns to Harry and demands a Melody Sword. Harry brushes it off with a “don’t ask me” kind of response and then Hugtan starts glowing, opens up a portal in the sky, and out fall Cure Black and Cure White. Roll credits.

Also we got this awesome end card.

HUG 22 picks up right where 21 left off. Emiru assumes Black and White are there to deliver her Melody Sword, but they’re just confused. After figuring out who everybody is, and concluding that there are other Precures out there (All Stars confirmed non-canon), they all head back to Harry’s store to regroup. Emiru and Ruru get in an argument over Emiru’s feelings about the loss of her guitar and Nagisa and Honoka give them advice, saying it’s okay for friends to fight sometimes and they certainly have *flashbacks to FW08*. Ruru can’t understand why Emiru is saying it’s alright that her guitar is broken considering how much she loves music, and Emiru doesn’t want to have to explain to her that she cares more about Ruru than a guitar. It’s not as deep as the fundamental difference in personality Nagisa and Honoka experienced but it’s something.

After the pep talks from their predecessors, Emiru and Ruru set about making gifts for each other. Emiru makes matching charm bracelets, similar to the one Hana, Saaya, and Homare wear but with red and purple heart links instead of pink, blue, and yellow.

BRIEF ASIDE: I feel like this charm bracelet maker comes up every few seasons. Is it an actual toy Bandai sells? Is it rebranded for each show or what? I need to look into this, and anybody with more info please chime in.

Meanwhile Ruru sets about making a pair of new guitars for Emiru and herself, with Saaya and Honoka helping. There’s a humorous moment where Honoka remarks that it’s easy to forget Ruru is an android..... while Ruru is cutting into sheet metal with her finger. As one does.

The next day (I think?) Emiru and Ruru meet up at a dock with everybody else looking on. They talk out their feelings and give each other their gifts, with Emiru explaining that she can replace a guitar but she could never replace Ruru or the friendship they’ve developed. Hana says it best:

Meanwhile at Criasu Corp, Papple is feeling like a failure because she can’t seem to eke a win against the Precures and Gelos is subtly putting pressure on her. She goes up to the room of her mysterious lover who is most definitely not the president of the company and the strange man Hana has bumped into a few times, but she sees Gelos in his room with him. Feeling betrayed and heartbroken, Papple flees the scene and runs to the roof of a building. Telling herself that if he loves her he’ll come stop her, she summons a bunch of negative energy and..... STABS HERSELF IN THE CHEST.

She becomes an Oshimaida and starts terrorizing the nearby Precures. The Hug gang all transforms and tries to fight her but she lays them all out, so Black and White enter the fray and they single.... or I guess doublehandedly give Papple the smackdown. She cries out, and Ruru recognizes that her former employer is inside of there. Cure Amour and Cure Macherie together vow to try to help Papple from the inside. Cheered on by Black, White, Yell, Ange, and Etoile, the duo dive into the monster’s soul...... right through her cleavage.

You can’t make this up.

Inside they find Papple crying her eyes out from heartbreak. Putting aside her personal feelings, Macherie gives her a pep talk with Amour’s help and they tell her that they will protect her love at all costs. This calms her down, and the duo emerges. Suddenly they receive two new Mirai Crystals and new weapons: the Twin Love Guitars, as a reward for their act of love. They perform their new finishing attack, Twin Love Rock Beat, which involves them strumming a tune on the guitars (despite the strings being like.... 6 inches long. I know it’s a toy and it’s magic but that is not how instruments work!) before holding them like guns and firing hearts at the Oshimaida to purify it.

The dust settles and the original duo congratulates the newest duo for a job well done, saying they make a great team. Hugtan babbles and glows and a portal opens up in the sky again as Nagisa and Honoka begin to levitate. Waving their goodbyes, they disappear back to their own world. After they’re gone, Harry asks Hugtan how she did it, to which she responds with more baby babble. I don’t know what they expected. Homare freaks out over how cute she is, and Emiru and Ruru observe that with their new bracelets they now match. We close on this image.

HUGtto! 22 was a good episode. An unexpected but welcome return by the original cures, and I do mean unexpected because to my knowledge Toei did not say ANYTHING about this prior to the broadcast of ep 21, so when Black and White fell out of the sky it was a big WTF moment. It was an important development episode for Ruru and Emiru, and while Nagisa and Honoka were prominent in mentoring them they never overshadowed them. There was a part in the fight where Black and White were kicking much more ass than the entire Hug team were able to, but ultimately it was Macherie and Amour’s ability to see beyond the surface and address Papple’s heartbreak that saved the day, and that’s admirable. Even though I’m currently still working my way back through Max Heart, it was nice to be able to get an entirely new adventure with some of my favorite characters, and see them interact with the newest team in a significant way (those end-of-series cameos we’ve gotten the last few years leave a lot to be desired). I like how they were able to relate the conflict of this episode to a similar one that Nagisa and Honoka faced back in 2004. The animation of the episode was great, this might be the smoothest the FW characters have ever been portrayed outside of the movies, and while there was some minor deviation from their original art style to suit the HUGtto art, it wasn’t drastic. I’m having trouble even pinpointing what it is, maybe their a little less squished, it’s hard to say. My only nitpick would be that Yukana and Honna Yoko sounded a bit.... off in this, but y’know it’s been 15 years and all that, their voices have probably changed. I may simply not have noticed it in All Stars films because it was gradual, but since I’m actively watching Max Heart right now I picked up on it more. It’s a very minor criticism and it doesn’t detract from a fantastic episode. Look forward to my v2 review in a couple years, if I manage to keep this project up for that long, haha.

PINK PRECURE CATCHPHRASE COUNT: 2 MECHOKKU PINK PRECURE CATCHPHRASE COUNT: 3 ARIENAI

#Precure #Pretty Cure #HUGtto! Precure #HUGPC22 #PCD730

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viewparadise · 7 years ago

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Story Time!

Rewind back to 1994.

(Let’s ignore the fact that I’m actually about 10 in this picture, but this is the earliest photo of me that I have on my computer. Even then, I was a fan of cute dogs.)

I have been introduced to the world of American Girl. The year before, I received Addy for Christmas. I thought she was amazing. Loved her books, loved her, all of it. And then I kept getting the catalogs, and I got obsessed with the other AGs.

But Molly piqued my interest the most. I think it was a tie with her being the then-closest to the modern times girl, and that argyle sweater. At any rate, I decided that I wanted this doll, and I was going to make the money to get her.

The problem was that I was eight years old and scraping up $82 (that’s how much the doll plus the paperback copy of her first book was in 1994; they’re like $120 now) was a long, arduous task. My allowance was $10 every other week if I did my chores/got good grades/my mom remembered to give us money, so I needed another income stream.

Enter friendship bracelets and miniature notebooks.

I was pretty good at making bracelets. I had bought packs of embroidery floss over the summer, and I loved braiding and tying knots and the whole nine. The notebook thing was something borne out of boredom. I’d basically cut down sheets of notebook paper, draw designs on the covers or use stickers, and give them to people.

Somehow, both the bracelets and the notebooks became a trend with my classmates. Right now, kids are obsessed with slime made from glue, but in the mid 90s, things were simpler. Kids would come up to me and ask if I could make them a notebook, and I’d be all, “Sure!” Someone else would be like, “I want a bracelet!” and I’d go, “Okay!” I charged 50 cents for bracelets and notebooks, and if I used a lot of color and stickers on the notebooks, they were $1.

I started making money. I’d go to recess with a box of embroidery thread, extra loose leaf and construction paper, pencils, and scissors. I’d work on my projects after school and then do my homework. I made, hand to God, about $20 from my recess Etsy shop.

And then this one day, maybe late October/early November, one of the teachers acting as recess monitor pulled me aside and said I had to stop selling my notebooks and bracelets.

I was shocked. First, because I didn’t know that the teachers even knew about my business, and second, because hi, I was just being crafty during recess and not really bothering anybody. It couldn’t be that bad, right?

Except that my two best friends were shaking kids down for money.

See, I was a lot nicer as a kid than I am now. I’m pretty nice now, and I know I’m a softie, but I’m like a softie underneath some carefully preserved shell. As a kid, I was 100% squish. So sometimes, people would ask me to make a bracelet or a notebook, and I’d do it, but they wouldn’t pay me.

Enter my two BFFs at the time.

They were acutely aware of the fact that I was a fluffy ball of emotion, and knew I would take IOUs until the cows came home. So if someone didn’t pay me, sometimes they’d be all, “Hey, Candice, Tommy didn’t pay you for your notebook yet. Want us to go get the money?” and I, being kind and trusting, would be all, “Sure!” and not even question what they would do to get Tommy to give me my money.

So for this almost one month period, I was the coolest kid in third grade, and it all got shot to hell because my friends, who were both like maybe 80 pounds a piece and like, 4′10″, decided to act like mobsters.

(As for Molly: I sucked it up and put the doll on my Christmas wish list. I got her that year. I KNOW, I WAS A SPOILED-ASS KID.)

#my life #textual #i mentioned this on twitter but here's the story #american girl

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bbusallday · 7 years ago

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BB19 Daytime Updates - 7/1 - Day 11 (Complete)

Updater: Hannah

Recent evictee: Cameron & Megan(self-evict) HOH: Cody Nominees: Alex & Jillian POV players: Cody, Jillian, Alex, Raven, Matt & Jason POV holder: Alex Have nots: Jillian, Josh & Ramses Den of Temptation: Paul

Feeds back from the morning wake up call at 10:17 AM

Houseguests are all getting up, getting ready, having breakfast, chatting about how they slept, etc. BB gave the houseguests BB cups, the same clear plastic ones as last year as well as black/metal ones. The hgs are all really excited about the cups, except Cody who said he doesn't want a cup.

11:11 AM

Nothing has been happening. The majority of the houseguests have just been in the kitchen chatting. They were on inside lockdown for a bit because the washing machine wasn't working. Paul taught Cody how to make slop, because Cody is now eating slop for some reason.

11:15 AM – cam 1

Kevin, Jillian, Alex, Cody, Jason, Elena, Ramses and Mark are outside. They discuss Josh and how he is going crazy and when he gets nominated it is going to be bad. Alex says Josh keeps getting in bed with her and Jillian and saying he wants a showmance with them.

They all agree that Josh will be gunning hard for this next HOH.

11:46 AM

Cams 1 & 2 have been on the backyard. Some houseguests are working out, some are chatting and lounging around.

Cams 3 & 4 have been on the kitchen. Paul is making french toast and everyone is raving about it.

11:47 AM – cam 2

Jillian, Jessica and Ramses in the backyard.

They are saying they don't know who will be the renom. Jillian says everyone wants Josh but he is safe, she tells them that Paul told her that she will stay this week because it would be stupid to vote her out now.

Jessica asks Ramses who he wants to go up. Ramses says he has no idea, but he thinks Cody will put someone up that he isn't close with.

Jillian says Josh told her he will go for safety again if he has the chance in another comp. They speculate that Josh has gotten the 25K and the temptation from the other day.

11:53 AM – cam 1

Mark does squats with Ramses on his back, the girls love it.

11:55 AM – cam 4

Cody and Matt in the HOH bathroom.

They discuss that there is a chance that if Alex wins HOH she would put Josh up. (Alex did say this earlier when they were outside talking about Josh, but she also said yesterday that she is after the showmances)

Cody says he is going to start making deals with Alex and Jason so in case they win HOH they can keep the couples and Dominique safe.

Cody doesn't want to say who he is putting up. Matt says it is fine, he trusts him and doesn't have to know everything.

Cody: A lot of people aren't going to understand my next move.

Matt: Cool man.

Matt leaves.

12:08 PM – cam 1

Cody and Jessica at the hammock.

Jessica tells him that Alex is considering using the veto on Jillian but she doesn't think Alex actually will. Jessica says Alex/Jillian were asking if Jillian will be safe this week and that it isn't fair that Jillian has been nominated this whole time.

Cody: I got a plan.

Jessica: Ok.

Cody: We're good.

Jessica: Alrighty

He walks off.

12:16 PM – cam 4

Jillian and Alex in the main bedroom.

Alex says she is honestly thinking about using the veto on Jillian now.

Jillian says that Alex will go home then.

Alex says everyone will be after her if she stays anyway and this will save Jillian and Jason this week.

They talk about the divide in the house and how outnumbered this side of the house is.

They speculate about what the votes would be if it was Jillian/Jason on the block. Alex isn't sure if Jillian would stay because some of the girls don't like her. Alex says she doesn't know how she would vote, she would have to flip a coin.

Alex says Christmas has daddy issues because she is always crawling into married guys laps.

Jillian thinks she has a better shot at staying because Jason is better at comps, but they may want Jillian out because she is closest to Alex.

They continue to speculate about what might happen, what the temptation was, what the curse is that Ramses got, etc.

Cody joins them at 12:24.

He says that before the ceremony he doesn't want to tell anyone what his move is, he says he wants to make an awesome deal with them.

Cody: I am loyal to Alex, so whatever Alex wants me to do I will protect your interest all the way to jury.

Alex: That's fair.

Cody says he will tell her who he wants her to protect when he makes the deal and he is going to try to make this same deal with someone else. (Jason)

Alex: Ok.

Cody leaves the room.

Alex asks if Jillian trusts him. Jillian says she doesn't know.

Alex says if Cody is telling the truth now then they can at least save Jillian this week.

At 12:27 Cam 3 shows Christmas in the love room trying to listen to their convo.

Alex and Jillian are trying to figure out what votes Jillian might have to stay and who Cody might put up next to her. Alex thinks they can maybe get Dominique or Christmas up. They are whispering now and decide to move to the have not room because they know Christmas was in the love room and might be listening to them.

Alex says if Cody tells her he is putting up Jason she will use the POV on Jillian because there is no point.

Jillian says she will be happy to stay but either way she is losing someone.

Alex says if she wins HOH next week she would put up Jessica/Cody because Cody blindsided her.

They just continue to speculate about things, but it isn't really relevant because no one knows what Cody is doing.

Ramses comes in at 12:39.

They ask him if Jason/Jillian are the noms then who would go. Ramses doesn't know. Alex has decided Jillian would go because the girls are jealous of her so they would save Jason.

Ramses says the renom is probably between him and Jason.

12:41 PM – cam 3

Cody grabs Ramses to talk, he takes him to the love room.

Cody: Yeah you just don't want to go up right, that's essentially it?

Ramses says yes, but he knows it is hard that Cody has to put up so many people this week.

Cody says it is cool.

Ramses says he doesn't talk game with anyone but Raven and he has barely talked with her. He says he wouldn't be after Cody and Jessica, he wants to be a vote for them.

Cody says if Ramses can protect his interests next week then they are good.

Ramses agrees. Cody says he will be good then.

Cody tells him to keep doing what he is doing because everyone likes him.

12:44 PM – cam 2

Cody has moved to the have not room where Alex and Jillian are.

Cody tells them that this will all make sense in the end. He still isn't giving out any more information.

Alex says again if Cody says he is putting Jason up she will use the veto on Jillian.

Cody says he will tell her right before the ceremony what he is doing.

Jillian asks if there is a bigger target he is after.

Cody: I can't say what I'm going to do, like I'm not telling anybody.

Cody tells them to relax and have fun, he leaves the room.

12:50 PM – cam 4

Matt and Jillian in the bathroom.

Jillian says she is struggling in this game, but she is fighting. She says she thinks she has figured out who Cody will nominate.

Matt says he isn't planning on voting her out, but he can't guarantee it.

Jillian: So there's a chance.

Matt: There's always a chance.

Matt says Jillian is handling her situation very well and is positive.

1:06 PM – cam 1

Cody and Mark in the kitchen. Cody says Jessica needs him for comfort but he doesn't need her.

They move on to discussing how well things are going for them. (just wait guys)

Cody: Did you ever think when you were watching the show that if you were on it you would be the one running the house?

Mark says from day 1 it has worked out perfect for them.

1:47 PM

Cams 1 & 2 – Raven Matt, Jessica and Cody in the kitchen trashing Josh.

Cams 3 & 4 – Josh, Paul and Christmas chatting in the lounge.

2:32 PM – cam 3

Paul and Jessica on the hammock.

Paul asks if everything is ok. Jessica says yes, Cody doesn't want to talk game, but he says he has a plan and to trust him.

Paul: Umm, but he wouldn't put one of us up though?

Jessica doesn't think so.

(I'm about 90% sure that Cody is planning to put up Paul now, but since Paul has safety it isn't going to work.)

Paul says he will try to talk to Cody later. Jess says he probably won't talk. Paul thinks he can talk to him since he never talks game with him. Jess says Cody shut down yesterday after she, Dom and Matt talked to him.

Jess: If he put one of us up I would be floored.

Paul: I don't know why he would do that.

They say it would be stupid for Cody to do that without talking to anyone, because they would just vote Jillian out.

Jess tells him about Alex saying she would use the veto on Jillian. Paul says then they should convince Alex that they will keep her safe if she uses the veto on Jillian and then just vote Alex out.

Jess says Cody would never vote Alex out. Paul says it doesn't matter because Cody doesn't vote and it would be up to them.

They discuss that if Alex won HOH she would probably nominate Jess/Cody. Paul says he is going to try to win HOH because he is an easy target.

Jessica says she would never go after Paul and she promised him that when he gave her a friendship bracelet.

They discuss who might have got the temptation and curse. Jessica doesn't think someone on their side would lie and say they didn't get it if they did. Paul agrees and says people on the other side probably got both.

Jess says if someone on their side doesn't get the temptation next week she will start to think America hates them. Paul says you never know what will happen, but it won't mean they are hated.

2:49 PM – cam 1

Dominique and Paul in the bathroom.

Paul: Any idea what Cody is going to do? I heard he just shut himself off, according to Jessica he doesn't want to talk.

Dom: Yeah.

Paul says he knew that would happen. He plans on trying to have a one on one with him later tonight. He asks if Dom prefers Jason or Ramses being the nominee.

Dom says she tried to talk to Ramses but he wouldn't give any info.

Paul says he knows Ramses has info though.

Dom says she thinks it will be Jason nominated, but she knows Cody and Jason are supposed to have a convo so it could change.

If you would like to help us and become a live feed updater send us a message at bbusallday.tumblr.com or email [email protected]!

#bb19 #bigbrother19 #big brother 19 #bblf #bbus19 #day11

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clumsycalumblr-blog · 8 years ago

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Would Never Call It Love | Finale

After many many many weeks of me being gone, I’ve finally gotten the courage to write the finale of a story that I’ve had so much fun writing, and have had so much fun seeing you guys reactions to it. This story is now my most popular with the most notes I’ve ever gotten on a post, and I can’t thank you guys enough for always pushing me to be a better writer. Sad to end this one, but I have ideas in store for a new story, can’t wait to share it with you guys hopefully soon :-). Enjoy.

(not my photo)

Previous parts: 1 2 3 4 5 6

This day had to come. This day was bound to creep on us sooner. This day may not seem huge to some people, but it’s huge to me.

The last show of their first leg of the tour. Also known as, the day I’ve decided to go back home to my lonely, small, quiet home...all by myself.

When did I decide this? Probably about 5 hours ago at 7 am when I impulsively bought a plane ticket, while at breakfast with Luke, Ashton, and Arzaylea. While the couple talked throughout breakfast, Ashton kept nudging me and bugging me about what had me so fixated on my small screen, but he leaned over a little far at one point and gave an annoyed sigh before throwing his share for his own food and walked out of the eatery. Luke and Arzaylea still haven’t figured it out.

Now here I am, packing my things, the memories of the last couple of weeks with the boys coming down on me. I picked up a black and white stripped shirt that I wore the day of their 3rd concert, the one where Michael spilled a little too much water on me backstage after the show, and my bra peeked through; of course he didn’t seem to mind though. I then started placing the different colored bracelets Ashton gave me within the second week of tour inside a little pouch in my suitcase. They made me smile because they matched his, so I’d always have a little part of him.

Then it got to my lingerie and undergarments, many of which I wore when Calum was over. I held back tears, my throat becoming itchy, as I packed them deeply away underneath anything else I could.

I heard a knock at my door, and saw Ash standing there, leaning against the door still looking displeased.

“You know they’re asking about what happened at breakfast right?”

I only rolled my eyes. “Why am I not surprised.”

“I’m not telling them, you are.” He strode toward my suitcase and began taking out the nicely folded clothes and even took things out of the pouches. The room went silent when he saw the colorful bracelets, and even the same bra from that night when everything took a turn for the worst. He bent down and studied them both, the memories hitting him hard as well.

“After all these weeks, you still have these bracelets?” He questioned quietly. I only gave him a nod. “And this...I remember this little number...everything felt so right that night.” He smiled sadly at the moment that practically changed everything; the friendship, the relationship, his ability to forgive himself for one mistake.

“Well, at least for one person it did.” He threw it back down next to the bracelets and began striding out of the room. I took two big steps before pulling him by the cuff of his sleeve, stopping him.

“Don’t do that to me. You don’t get to be mad at me for the decision I’m making. So what if I’m leaving? So what if I don’t want to be here anymore? It is not my fault that because of my stupid mistakes I don’t want to be in a place where I am not welcome anymore Ashton. Sorry that you don’t have a choice. You’re a part of this band, these are your best friends and even though you’re having a fight with one of them doesn’t mean you can take it out on me because you can’t run away from it like I’m doing.”

“You’re being selfish. You’re thinking of only yourself. Which is exactly what Calum said the other night when you tried talking to him right?” Slap. Instantly my hand landed on his right cheek, making it head and hair whip to the side and cover his face. My breathing was heavier and louder, the feeling of my cheeks getting red growing. He turned his head back slowly, his eyes like dagger stabbing into my skin. I could just the anger dripping off of him.

“Y/N look...” he tried to sound sympathetic, but I only held up my finger and pointed it at the door.

“Just get out.” He knew he was defeated, and that he hit a spot in me that stung. Before I shut the door on him, he turned back slightly and whispered, “Just call me when you get there, please. I need to know that you’ll be safe.” I hummed in response, and shut the door, leaning my back against it.

Hiding my suitcase backstage behind a bunch of curtains was surprisingly easy. It was easy access, and since I would be leaving 15 minutes before the end of the guys show, nobody would really know that I had left. The only person I’d truly have to say goodbye to is Ashton since he was the only one that knew, or so I thought.

Arzaylea caught me at the snack table and tugged on my jacket, getting as far away from the boys as possible. I gave her a confused look, waiting for her to tell me what was going on since she looked so worried.

“Arz, w-what’s going on-”

“I bugged Ashton for hours about what went wrong this morning, and he finally told me.” She crossed her arms staring me down, while I was looked down messing with my fingers.

“Look, please don’t be upset with me-”

“Oh, you think I’m just upset. That’s rich. I’m more than upset with you Y/N. You’ve become like a sister to me, I thought you were stronger and had more integrity than you’re showing right now. You’re letting a stupid boy get in the way of you living your best life. You think you’ve fucked up? You think I haven’t fucked up either! This-this is all just so disappointing.”

“You have to understand that I’m miserable here now. There’s never a day that goes by anymore that I don’t blame myself for how things have laid out the past couple of weeks. I’ve only made things worst since being here, when I wasn’t even suppose to be in the first place!” I felt the water prickle in my eyes, but clenched my fists to help make it go away.

“If you’re mad because you feel like once I’m gone you feel like we’ll never see or talk to me again, then I can make a promise that that won’t happen.” She only scuffed, but in an amusing way.

“That’s partly why.” She pushed my shoulder playfully as we both smiled at each other.

“I’ll still text you, facetime you and call you. Just because Calum and I can’t get along great doesn’t mean I have to give up some of the best people in my life. I just have to...give him some space. It’s for the best.” I peeked over her shoulder slightly to see Calum biting into a green apple, water bottle in his other hand. I couldn’t help but shutter at the veins popping out of his neck and how defined his jawline got when it jutted out to eat the piece of the apple. It’s the simple things Calum did that got under my skin.

Arzaylea pulled me into a tight hug then pulled back to smile at me, and proceeded to do what most girls do with their best friends, take a snapchat. She pulled up a funny filter to get me to calm down and smile, but after the picture was taken, something slimy and runny was piled on top of my head.

Arzaylea and I jumped back from each other as some of it did get on her too, then we turned around to find Nia with a smirk holding the big plate that was dead center of the snack table that was labeled “Spaghetti.” The crew and everyone stopped doing whatever they were doing, and watched to find out what was going to happen next.

“Nia what the fuck!” Arz yelled, wiping off the bits of tomato sauce that was now on her clothes and hair.

“She deserved it.” She came up close to my face, trying to intimidate me however I held my ground and stared her right back down.

“That’s for making Calum break up with me.” She chuckled. “You think he’d really eventually end up falling for you? Oh girl, you’ve got it so wrong. He told me all the awful things you’ve done to him, but don’t worry, I fucked all the bad feelings out of him.” Before I could hear another word, I pushed past her walking fast toward the curtain where my suitcase was located. Sure, I’d have to wait in the airport for almost 2 hours, but I couldn’t stand to be in anybody’s presence anymore. I felt an arm tug me around, and the same husky voice from before rang through my ears.

“Y/N what are you doing, you can’t leave now!” He yelled in my face.

“Ashton! Stop trying to make my decisions for me. You may love me but you don’t know what’s best for me.” His grip instantly loosened and I took the chance to take my arm from his hand. “Now let me go.” And grab my suitcase hoisting it up from the ground and running toward the back exit.

I didn’t see it, but I left Calum standing there with his food now sprawled across the floor at his feet, a dumbfounded look on his face, and for the first time in a while, an aching heart.

Calum’s POV

The last show of this first leg of the tour was thrilling and exciting, but once my body left that crowd of energy and happiness, reality snapped back into me, and all my confusion and frustration came out of me when I chucked my water bottle at the nearest wall, and it exploded everywhere. Michael’s soft voice could be heard right behind me, telling me to calm down and to not take my anger out so aggressively like that because who knows, I could’ve hit a person instead.

“Look, I know MIkey, I’m sorry...I just-I’m so confused right now.” We both plopped down on the couch in our dressing room, my hands coming up to my face.

“What did Ashton mean by ‘you can’t leave now’ when he was talking to Y/N? And what was in her hands when she was running away...”

“She left.”

My hands came down from my face, hoping and praying I’d see a laughing MIchael after that statement. It just couldn’t be true. But after a few seconds had passed, he continued to nod his head, as if he was still trying to make the situation seem real.

“She left Cal. She went back home tonight. Ashton told me before we went on stage tonight. He couldn’t tell you because he knew it would only distract you more. He just doesn’t want to keep making you mad mate, he cares for you so much even after everything.” His hand came up to my shoulder giving it a friendly squeeze. My chest sank lower in my chest trying to piece together just how bad everything had gotten, my life outside of the lights and music, was falling into shambles.

“I need to go make up with him first.” Michael smiled and agreed, both of us quickly grabbing our stuff before heading out. He informed me that Ashton had drove straight to the hotel we were staying at right after the show ended, and that Luke and Arzaylea were spending some time together tonight out and about. We headed straight after to him to patch things up. Even though that was the first thing on my mind, I was secretly hoping Y/N just might be there.

We raced up to the elevator and impatiently waiting until it reached our floor, only to find Ashton just closing his door as if he was leaving. I ran up to him and tackled him in a big hug, his weight leaning against mine to stop us from falling. I was holding him so tight the indents in my arms were showing through, and my hand veins were popping out.

“Ash, ash I’m so sorry for everything dude. You come before anyone else and I shouldn’t have blamed you for everything happening.” We pulled away and he smiled so big his famous dimples showed, and the crinkles near my eyes accompanied my own smile.

“Cashton, always man.” And we did one of those bro handshakes, Michael leaning against the hallway wall watching this beautiful moment unfold. My eyes slowly drooped after things quieted down. Ashton could read my mind, and his arms reached out to gently rub my shoulders.

“So, she’s really gone?”

“I just got off the phone with her. I raced back here to see if she’d still be here but, no luck.” I shook my head in disbelief, disappointed in myself for being as stubborn as I was and almost losing my best friend, along with the girl of my dreams. “Her plane should be taking off soon, I’d say text her Cal. She needs to hear from you that you at least don’t hate her.”

“But that’s the point. I don’t hate her at all, I feel so strongly for her, more than I ever thought I could for someone...” Michael came behind me and leaned his head on me sighing. The weight of her gone now upon all of us. The atmosphere seemed different, the vibe between all of us was still off, as if the Earth was off its axis and everything seemed...wrong.

“Why don’t we get some rest now guys, we’ve worked hard these past couple of weeks. Let’s enjoy these next few days before our next leg? Am I right?” We all agreed and they decided to walk with me to my room and stay the night, just so we knew that we were all there for each other if one of us needed something throughout the night.

As we entered the room, I walked in first to see a familiar jet black sleek suitcase sitting next to the door. My eyes widened and I looked up to see Ashton holding back a small grin, jutting out his chin, telling me to go see what I was already thinking. My legs quickly carried me past the small curve of the room into the bedroom, seeing a small Y/N sitting crossed legged on my bed in the first t-shirt I ever gave her to keep when I wasn’t around her, my Maine t-shirt.

She stood up upon hearing my loud strides and the shirt fell to just above her privates, her hair disheveled and her makeup slightly streaky, like she had been crying.

“Calum...” her voice croaked. I looked back at the boys, watching them in awe as Michael’s face lit up at the sight of her, Ashton looking proud. And they both walked slowly out of the room, leaving us alone.

“They told me you left...” I said in disbelief.

“I couldn’t...I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t get on that plane and fly away from you, not without fixing things first.” She walked closer to me timidly. I had to bring her closer, so I pulled her in by her waist, wrapping my large hand around the back of her head and placing it underneath my chin, my other hand tightly wrapped around her waist. My breathing became heavy, my heart beat racing, my head filling up with euphoric memories.

“You’re-you’re heart is beating so fast Cal...”

“It’s because it’s happy to be close to you again.” She pulled away to look up at me, her eyes glossy once again, a happy yet sad look in her eyes, as if she didn’t know how to feel in his moment.

“Y/N I am so sorry for never letting you have a chance at explaining things to me, or never giving you a chance to speak and finish your sentences. And I’m sorry that it took me so long to realize it and that it took you almost leaving for me to realize that I never stopped feeling for you. But I promise if you stay, right here, with me, you won’t ever have to go through something like this again. We could have the love we’ve always wanted.” I pleaded. Without hesitation she reached up and brought my face to meet hers, her lips lightly pressing the softest kiss we’d ever shared. I couldn’t help but deepen it, feeling her smaller frame pushed up against mine again. We rested our foreheads against one another as she brought her hands to rest on my chest, lightly rubbing her thumbs over the material.

“I wouldn’t have ever called this love before.” Gesturing to the past complicated relationship we had.

“What about right now?”

“It’s the only word I can use to describe it.”

YAY IT’S FINISHED. I was going to add smut but this alone took me 3 hours so I’m extremely tired you guys ;( request smut though if you want it! Again, thank you so much on the love for this story! I put up a ‘would you rather’ post so if you could, please look at it and tell me which story you’d like to write next. Btw GGMOW will be up soon as well!

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