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keeryhours · 2 months ago

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the needle and the damage done - chapter four

Older! Rockstar! Eddie Munson x female! reader

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Eddie Munson Masterlist

Summary:

Eddie graduates from rehab and comes home.

Warnings:

(18+), smut, unprotected p in v, Eddie has a breeding kink, pregnancy, detailed depictions of drug use/abuse, childhood trauma, description of an overdose

Word Count: 3.2k

A/N:

This is a heavy one y’all. I hope you enjoy the chapter <3

Things went downhill fast.

It started with a pill snuck here or there, just when the cravings got especially bad. That was easier to hide. No one suspected anything, it just gave him a slight high, enough to get through his days. Rehab was boring, after all. He missed you. He missed his girls.

At least he had his guitar. He wrote songs all day, songs about heroin that sounded more like love songs than anything else. God, how he missed it.

But the past week, things had escalated. Jake was sneaking him heroin, and Eddie was shooting up in his en suite bathroom again.

When Eddie graduated from his rehab program, he had been back on drugs for weeks. He had no idea how no one noticed, but he wasn’t complaining or pushing the subject.

He felt like the biggest loser in the world, and he had no idea how he was supposed to face you and the band now.

You and the guys, who had been so proud of him. The girls, who were eagerly awaiting their dad’s return. That was the worst part - the knowledge that he had let his girls down. He couldn’t live with it, and it only pushed him towards the drugs even more.

He figured he could hide it a little longer - maybe he could go home and keep using, as long as he was careful. He could keep sneaking away to get high in the bathroom, acting as normal as possible when around you and the girls or the band. He could do this - he could go home and live his life and have the drugs, too.

Right?

Eddie looked at himself in the mirror. He didn’t look as good as he had at the last visit, that was certain. He had lost weight again, the dark circles under his eyes had come back. Fuck, you would know there was something up for sure.

He wore a dress shirt and slacks, his hair combed and facial hair neatly trimmed. It was his rehab graduation ceremony, a day he should have been proud of. Instead, he felt like a fraud.

Eddie slipped into his bathroom, attempting to calm himself before the ceremony began. He couldn’t exactly shoot up before going out there and seeing you all, but he could have a little something to take the edge off, right? He popped open his mini “first aid kit” and took 2 Oxys, placing them right on his tongue. There.

It didn’t take too long for the pills to kick in. By the time he was ready to go, he was feeling pretty damn good, blissed out and relaxed. A couple nurses, including Jake, escorted him down the hall towards the room where the ceremony would be held. He wondered if they had any idea how fucked up he was right now. Well, Jake might have had a pretty good idea.

In the room his eyes went to you first, smiling and giving him a small wave. You wore a dress that accentuated your growing bump, now 22 weeks. You’d had the appointment to find out what you were having a couple of weeks ago, but had the results in an envelope for you and Eddie to experience together.

Evie, Rhiannon, and Ivy stood next to you, each in matching red dresses. They looked nervous, clutching each other’s hands. Roz stood on the other side of the girls, followed by Gareth, Jeff, and Grant. They all looked so proud of him, it made him sick.

He went through the graduation ceremony, pretending like he wasn’t currently high and hadn’t been for the past 6 weeks. He couldn’t even meet your eyes. Afterwards you wanted to take pictures, where he faked his smile and pretended he wasn’t the absolute scum of the earth.

Eddie was happy to be home. The girls were all over him, wanting him to play, but he covered up the fact he was too high by saying he was just tired. You believed him - “Come on girls, give Daddy a break.”

“Daddy, are you better?” Rhiannon asked. “You’re not sick anymore?”

Eddie felt sick. “I’m better, baby girl. Not sick anymore.”

After he’d been home for a few hours, you couldn’t take the anticipation anymore. You brought out a white box from the fridge, setting it on the counter. “Are we ready to find out if we’re getting a little brother or sister?”

“Yes!” The girls yelled in unison, skipping into the kitchen and jumping up and down with excitement as they waited. You opened the box, revealing a white cake. Eddie joined you, looking over it to see if there was a glimpse of what lay inside.

“How do we know?” Rhiannon asked, standing on her tippy toes to peer at the cake.

“If it’s blue inside it’s a boy,” you explained with a smile. “And if it’s pink, it’s a girl.”

“I want a girl!” Evie said, which made you laugh.

“You don’t have enough sisters?” You teased your oldest.

“Boys are gross,” she said, making a face. “I like having sisters.”

“I want a brother!” Rhiannon said. “Daddy’s outnumbered.”

Eddie laughed at that - it was woefully true. “I’m okay with it. I love my girls. Could be fun to have a boy, though.”

“What about you, Ivy?” You asked your 3 year old. “Do you want a little brother or a little sister?” You knew this was big for her, she wouldn’t be the baby anymore. She’d never gone through the new sibling thing before, unlike her older sisters. Evie was a pro at this point.

Ivy thought for a moment. “Sister,” she answered finally, a tiny shy grin on her face.

“Eddie?”

“A boy,” he answered. “But I’m happy with another girl, too.”

“Okay, is everyone ready?” You asked, grabbing a large knife from the block and holding it over the cake. Eddie placed his hand on the handle next to yours.

“Yes!” The chorus came from all three girls again.

You and Eddie cut into the cake, the anticipation buzzing in your stomach. You cut the slice and pulled it out - revealing blue filling. You, Eddie, and Rhiannon cheered, Evie letting out a groan.

“It’s a baby brother!” You announced, tears falling from your eyes. Eddie pulled you into a tight hug and you buried your face in his chest as he rubbed your back.

“Wow,” Eddie whispered, only loud enough for you to hear. “A son.”

That night Eddie climbed into bed with you, wrapping his arms around you. He kissed all along your back and shoulders, his hands roaming under your top.

“Baby,” he moaned against your skin, leaving sloppy kisses as he went. “I haven’t had sex in 8 weeks. I’m desperate for you.”

You could feel just how desperate he was pressed up against your ass, his cock painfully hard and throbbing. You wanted to help him, and you needed it, too. You turned over so you were facing him, reaching a hand between your bodies and stroking him over his boxers. He crashed his lips into yours, kissing you deeply.

“Do you want to be on top?” He asked you breathlessly as he pulled away. “I don’t know if you’re uncomfortable on your back yet, we can do it however-“

“I’ll be on top,” you answered him, straddling his lap as he laid flat on his back. His hands moved to your hips, rocking you against his erection. You had on one of his t-shirts and a pair of shorts, Eddie in only his boxers. He lifted your shirt up and off as you stood up on your knees, pulling his boxers down. Eddie hooked his fingers in your shorts and panties, pulling them down as much as he could before you had to help out. He put a hand on your belly to help keep your balance as you got them off.

You could feel his hard cock pressing insistently against your entrance, Eddie reached between you to line himself up properly. You slowly sunk down on his cock, both of you moaning as you took him inch by inch.

“Fuck, Eds,” you moaned, slowly starting to rock your hips on top of him. “It’s been so long. You feel so good.”

“Yeah, too fuckin’ long,” Eddie said gruffly, thrusting his hips up into you. “Feel so good, baby, you’re so tight and hot, gonna make me fill you up.”

You whined, bouncing a little faster on him. You could feel the tip of his cock pressed against your bundle of nerves deep inside, and when he began rubbing circles on your clit, you were even more lost in the pleasure. Your head was thrown back, body on full display for Eddie’s eyes as you rode him. He was in heaven.

“Fuck, yeah, so good baby, keep riding me like that. You’re taking my cock so good. Shit, if you weren’t already pregnant I’d put another baby in you.”

You laughed breathlessly at that. “I think we’ve got enough of those.”

“I can never knock you up enough times,” Eddie grunted, his hands roaming over your body. “Love filling you up with my cum. I love seeing you pregnant with my babies.”

“Yeah?” You moved faster. Eddie was falling apart beneath you, it had been so long since he’d gotten to fuck you, he wasn’t lasting long. You also weren’t aware that he was pretty damn high. “Wanna cum inside and fill me up, Eds?”

“God yes,” Eddie groaned. “I want you, baby. Need you to cum on this cock first, though.”

You whined, your orgasm close. Eddie kept up his movements on your clit - “Fuck, wish I could taste you-“ until you were seeing stars, pussy throbbing around his dick, moaning his name over and over again as you came. “Eddie! Eddie! Eddie!”

Eddie gripped your waist tightly in his hands as he fucked up into you hard a few times, until he was throwing his head back and groaning while he came inside of you. You raked your nails down his tattooed chest, driving him crazy.

You collapsed on the bed next to him and he wrapped his arms around you, burying his face in your neck. “I love you so fuckin’ much, baby.”

“I love you too, Eddie.” You smiled to yourself - Eddie was home. Your family was together. Things were going to be okay.

Rhiannon had her big dance recital that weekend.

You got the other girls all dolled up, dressed in matching dresses. Eddie wore a suit, his curls smoothed and pulled back in a ponytail. He couldn’t help but notice the perfect roundness of your belly now beneath your red dress. He placed a hand on it, and you turned to him and smiled.

“How’s Ozzy?” He asked, rubbing the bump over the soft material of your dress.

“First of all, his name is not going to be Ozzy-“

“Hey, I still have 18 weeks to change your mind.” It was hard to disagree with him when he was giving you that gorgeous smile, the all encompassing one that spread across his whole face. It was moments like these that it struck you, you loved this man.

“And second,” you continued, “he’s laying directly on my bladder, so maybe ask your son if he could be a little more considerate.”

Eddie dropped to his knees in front of you. “Ozzy-“

“Not his name.”

“-I need you to be good for your mama, okay?” He rubbed your stomach, and your son moved beneath his hand, like he was acknowledging his father speaking to him. Eddie’s face lit up with another grin. “Stop giving her trouble, young man. She works hard, growing you into a fully-formed human.”

You giggled as Eddie stood back up. Somehow, the baby had moved out of his uncomfortable position.

“Mommy!” A frustrated voice came from the doorway. Rhiannon stood there, halfway stuck in her costume. “I need help.”

“Oh!” You hurried over to her, ushering her back into her room. You untangled her from her costume and got it on her properly, smoothing the skirt of her tutu. Next, you tied up her ballet flats. “There we go.”

“I’m ready to go!” She yelled, jumping around in circles and spinning her pirouettes. Eddie peered in the door, leaning against it and smiling at you both.

“Let’s hit the road, girls,” he said, twirling his car keys around his finger. “We’ve got a show to get to.”

Rhiannon danced her heart out. She had a real talent for ballet, and you could definitely see her sticking with it and becoming a real ballerina. She took it seriously, as she didn’t do much.

Eddie teared up as he watched her. He felt so proud. These were the things he’d been missing to get high instead. It hit him then, hard. You reached over and took his hand, giving it a squeeze and a small smile that he returned. He placed one hand on your belly and the other around Ivy on his lap. Evie leaned against his shoulder on his left.

He felt content.

Eddie was fine with just the pills for a while, but eventually they stopped doing it for him. He needed more. He wanted to shoot up again, his veins itched for it.

He really had intended to be a better man. He wanted to be. But he just wasn’t.

He was texting his dealer before he could think better of it. He couldn’t shake that sinking feeling of guilt in his stomach that had been there since the first time he dialed Jake’s number.

The next thing he knew, he was sitting in his dealer’s living room.

“I got this new shit,” Jeremy said as he weighed and divided his product into small baggies. Eddie watched closely, his body itching for the high.

“Yeah?” Eddie was bouncing his leg, his hands restlessly playing together. “It’s good?”

“Like nothing you’ve ever experienced, man,” Jeremy laughed. “How much you want?”

There was something about the fact that Jeremy didn’t even have to ask if he wanted some that made Eddie feel like an even bigger loser. “The usual.”

When Eddie left, the drugs in his pocket begging to be taken, he debated getting rid of them. He debated going through the withdrawals again, maybe going to a different rehab and doing it for real this time. But he made a different decision.

He drove home, the guilt eating him alive. He longed to get home and inject the drugs into his veins, to stop thinking, to stop feeling. He was relieved when he got home and the house was dark. It was past the girls’ bedtime and you’d been so tired from the pregnancy lately that you’d been going to bed at the same time.

Eddie snuck into the house quietly, slipping into the large bathroom attached to your bedroom. He sat on the floor, pulling out his kit and the drugs he’d gotten. He measured the same dose he always took - it had been a while, so he knew it would hit hard. He heated up the drugs in the spoon, placing the cotton in it then collected the shot in his syringe. He tied the tourniquet around his upper arm, finding his vein. It was getting harder to do, but he eventually found it, injecting the needle into his arm. He untied the tourniquet and pushed off, the euphoria washing over him in a wave.

He felt incredible. His limbs gave out, arms flopping down at his sides. He let the feeling take him, not a care in his mind - until it suddenly felt harder to breathe, and his eyes started to close. He fought it as panic rose in his chest, attempting to crawl to the door with the last bit of fight left in his body before he lost consciousness.

You weren’t surprised when you woke up for the 50th time that night having to pee. This was your life every time you were pregnant - interrupted sleep and a million trips to the bathroom. Eddie still wasn’t in bed, but it wasn’t that late yet.

You rubbed your eyes as you held your stomach, sleepily waddling to the en suite bathroom. The light was already on, which was strange. You opened the door slowly. “Ed?”

The sight before you had you screaming, nearly getting sick on the spot. Eddie was passed out on the floor, his skin pale, needle and supplies on the floor next to him. He looked dead. Tears immediately started falling and you panicked for only a moment before you turned and ran for your purse, grabbing your phone and the Narcan nasal spray you started carrying on you the first time you caught Eddie with hard drugs.

“Mommy?”

Your heart sunk as you heard Rhiannon’s terrified voice from the doorway. You turned to see your 6 year old, her wide eyes locked on her father’s lifeless body. “Is he dead?” Her voice came out as a squeak, and your heart broke.

“Rhi, go get your sisters and stay in Evie’s room, okay?” You told her, trying to calm your voice. “I’ll come get you.”

Rhiannon didn’t move. “Is he dead?” She asked again.

You clenched your eyes shut, big fat tears falling down your cheeks. Because you didn’t know how to answer her question. “Go get your sisters and stay in Evie’s room!”

Finally she moved, turning and sprinting down the hall. You dialed 911 as you ran into the bathroom, pulling the cap off the Narcan and spraying it in his nose.

“911, what’s your emergency?”

“I think- My husband is overdosing.” Your voice shook, but you tried to keep it as steady as possible.

“What’s the address?”

You told her quickly, touching Eddie’s cold face, wondering if you’d ever see his smile again.

“An ambulance is on the way. Name and age?”

“Edward Munson, 37.”

“Do you know what he’s taken?”

“I…” You looked around, but you weren’t exactly knowledgeable about what you were looking at. “Heroin, probably. I gave him a dose of Narcan about a minute ago.”

“Is he breathing?”

You took a shuddering breath. “I don’t know. It doesn’t feel like it.”

“Heartbeat?”

You placed two of your fingers on his neck. Your own heart stopped in your chest as you didn’t feel anything at first, but finally - a faint, slow thumping. “Yes, it’s soft and slow, but yes.”

There was a knocking at the front door before you heard it open. “In here!” You called, and a crew of paramedics hurried in and surrounded Eddie. You watched in horror as they quickly strapped him to a stretcher, the way they moved telling you that this was not good and filling you with the fear you may never see your husband again.

As they urgently took him away, some of the paramedics spoke to you, but all you could hear was the rushing in your own ears. Finally someone got through to you - “Do you want to follow us?”

“I…my girls…”

The paramedic nodded in understanding. “You figure out what you need to. Just come into the emergency department and they’ll bring you to him.”

You watched the body of your husband disappear, wondering if you’d ever see him alive again.

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