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#Rook watches in horror as their friend makes out with one of their gods
eeriemothz · 1 month
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Dalish!Rook and Lavellan watching Solas shed his elvish guise and assume the form of the dread wolf
R: damn I thought the dread wolf thing was metaphorical
L:
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nessieseadreams · 1 year
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Twst characters as things I did as a child
I had no idea what my first post should be so here is some crack hcs ig you can call them based on things I did when I was idk 13 and below :)
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yuu (malleus is the person in question) - became close friends with someone who developed a crush on them. mf was hugging, holding hands and patting their back and all they thought was “oh wow what a good friend,” cause they’re fucking oblivious to flirting cause they’re aroace.
riddle - forced himself to like girls before realising he too was aroace
Trey - was the priest in the playground for a guy who wanted to marry his carrot
Cater - vents in his notes app and forgets, so when he goes back into it he gets flashbacks
Deuce - started sobbing after someone made a joke about him not having a dad (it was a rough day)
Ace - called someone a wanker and riddle had to make him apologise to the kid
Leona - mother admitted he was “an accident” but was still loved and somehow interpreted that as her admitting she hated him
Ruggie - stole a pack of gum and thought he would go to jail only for no one to notice. that’s how his theivary started
Jack - father thought his obsession with a werewolf show was demonic and banned him from watching it
Floyd - punched someone when they said his drawing looked like baymax
Jade - walked (or swam…fuck idk) around the school playground and talked to himself cause he had no friends
Azul - made an entire obstacle course in primary school and made people pay him in seaweed (leaves) and it got so bad the teachers had to tell him to stop cause there was no seaweed left around the school (all the trees didn’t have leaves)
Kalim - hid in a huge shopping centre when he and his family were on holiday in a different country and got half of it closed to search for him. he just wanted to play hide and seek :(
Jamil - got told “d-d-dora…d-d-deported,” and just laughed in confusion.
vil - keeps away from mario kart cause he knows if he plays it he would become way too fucking competitive and curse out all the children playing it and scare them.
Rook - secretly burned the tops of his fingers cause he liked the feeling
Epel - ate an entire shrek lipbalm cause it was apple flavoured and he fucking loves apple flavoured stuff. then got sick right after
Idia - got told off for wearing cat ears to school
idia again - screamed bloody murder when his favourite character died in an anime and then sobbed louder when it turned out the character reincarnated, his brother rushed up the stairs thinking he was dying
Sebek - saw his teacher from years ago after a long time and yelled “OH MY GOD YOU HAVE GREY HAIR,” the minute he saw her.
Silver - helped a kid once because he felt bad for them since they were lost but now continuously runs away from them cause they KEEP ON FUCKING FOLLOWING HIM EVERYWHERE AND HE CANT TELL THEM TO STOP BECAUSE HIS VOICE IS TOO FUCKING QUIET
Lila - grew up witnessing horror and seeing gruesome shit (playing resident evil at 5 and watching pewdiepie play corpse party) and now has a weird fascination of horror and gore.
Malleus - constantly gets told ‘are you okay?’ or ‘are you tired?’ no bitch that’s his resting face, asshole
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bansheeoftheforest · 3 years
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Syndicate + gang leader au where Henry kills his brothers
Jacob x Henry because it’s healthier than Lanyon x Henry
-🦎
OK THIS ONE IM ACTUALLY GOING TO TRY TO STAY ON TOPIC TO AND JUST RAMBLE IDEAS AND HCS INSTEAD OF TRYING TO MAKE A GODDAMN MASTER LIST OF EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS IN THE AU JFC HOW DOES THAT KEEP HAPPENING SDJFHSJDF
Anyways <3
Gang leader / Syndicate crossover au:
Henry is the youngest of the three brothers, Raphael and Kent are nonidentical twins. Henry is two years younger than them and has always been the baby of the group. Raphael and Kent have always been protective of him and also love to mess with him.
Their parents were abusive, Raphael and Kent decided to take the opportunity to leave Glasgow the first moment they got and they took Henry with them. They moved to London and one of their uncles-- who owned and inherited quite a successful shipping company by the London docks-- gave Kent and Raphael jobs as Henry went to university. The uncle died before Henry graduated, and left the business to Raphael and Kent.
Henry did not talk a lot to his brothers while in University. He tried to reach out to them but suddenly Raphael and Kent were "incredibly busy", Henry assumed they were busy trying to keep the family business going well.
He went to visit them on their dock after he graduated and got his doctorate. He had learned a lot about the London "culture" and gangs from Robert (and Rachel) telling him everything there is about the London underground and the aristocracy. Much to his horror, he arrived at the docks to find his brothers dressed as Templars.
Henry was quickly forced into the Templar order against his will. His brothers gaslight and manipulated him into joining, other members threatened to hurt him or his friends if he didn't join, and it ended up being Henry's biggest regret.
Henry spent about 13 years in the Templar order working in secret for it. He was allowed to do as he pleased as long as he made poisons for them. In the meantime, Henry tried to make up for the guilt he had from the suffering he had caused by helping people on the street. Hungry, dirty, sick people who quickly becoming loyal to the doctor who always feeds them and gives them what they need to survive.
In this part of the au, Henry more directly creates the gang. He realizes that these people are willing to fight for him and they have placed him on a pedestal. He can't get himself down from it so he takes advantage of it. He makes sure that the Society is under constant protection and that the gang brings in money that can be spent on taking care of the members and keep the Society afloat. No Lodger cares enough for the finances to notice the sudden influx of money, and Henry merely tells Rachel and Robert that it’s “sponsors”.
It was only when the Frye Twins entered and began to liberate London that he decided that it was the perfect time to finally break free from the Templar order. He had long since lost any love he still had for his brothers and he would do anything to be free again. He ended up cornering and murdering his brothers in cold blood while his gang distracted the Blighters, and he blamed the murders on the Frye Twins afterwards, the very same Frye Twins that quickly would... Well... Realize that they did not kill these Templars and instead try to track down the murderer that blamed it on them.
In the end, they find their way to Dr. Henry Jekyll's office. Henry had done a good job and working behind the scenes and no one had really suspected him of working for the Templars, so the twins-- while hearing from Greenie that it was rumored that the Jekyll Brothers and Dr. Henry Jekyll were related-- did not know that Henry himself used to be a Templar.
Henry, however, assumed they had broken into his office to kill him. He had already resigned himself to his own death, he was not going to fight it. He had burnt every photograph and document he had that connected him to his brothers and he had merely been waiting for the twins to come and kill him. He was, honest to god, quite disappointed when the Twins seemed confused and instead asked him if he knew anything about the murder of the Jekyll brothers.
"...The murder of my brothers, the Templars? The murder committed by someone close and well trusted by them, the murder that went undetected, and that was later blamed on you? The murder that had slank past the eyes of public after a convenient gang fight right that moment?"
It does not take long for the twins to realize what he is hinting to. His voice his bitter and his body language is cold, yet it doesn't sound like he regrets it.
ahaha anyways i ended up accidentally just retelling the entire thing well time for some actual hcs about this au branch.
Henry gets extreme paranoia after having murdered his brothers. He swears he can still see their faces of terror or hear their screams of pain and agony when he closes his eyes and try to go to sleep. He constantly feels followed by them, but he is too used with Hyde, so he doesn't pay attention to "them". When he doesn’t sleep, they silently follow him with whatever other hallucinations he have at the moment, like Moreau.
He wanted to be the one to murder his brothers himself, he didn't find it dignified to have someone else do the murdering for him. He generally does not want his gang to murder people, only hurt those of necessity, and he still wanted to give his brothers the dignity of not having to be killed by a random gang member.
Something in him kinda... Died that day. His friends, the Lodgers, and his very on gang could all notice how Henry seemed... Colder, more tired, constantly exhausted. He refused to tell anyone why, though, and he still did everything he needed to do so no one could force an explanation out of him. It was not until the newspapers reported on the murder that people realized that he was acting weirdly because his brothers had been murdered. Henry debated snapping his own neck once the Lodgers began to flock to him with words of sympathy, unaware that he was the murderer.
He is extremely benevolent to his gang, something many feared he wouldn’t be at first. He has always been a kind person and that’s why people began to flock to him as it was, but some feared that he would... Ah, turn crueler after a while like most gang leaders. That never happened, though. He saw each and every one of his gang members as his family, and took care of them as such.
He and his gang began teaming up with Lucy many years before either met the twins. It was always fun when Rachel tried to introduce the two of them without telling Henry that Lucy is... Well, Queen Lucy, and it was always fun to act as if they had never met before and as if Henry hadn’t just been invited to dinner the night before. Henry is really good friends with Patrin and Elise.
Henry’s gang wear blue. The Blighters wear red and before the twins and the Rook started, Henry didn’t want his own gang associated or reminding him of Hyde. Blue it was, and it easily made his gang slip into crowds and disguise themselves to be the Scotland Yard.
Neither Brokenshire nor Abberline knew about Henry’s gang until Abberline started working with the twins and until after Henry was “recruited” by them. Depending on if Henry murdered his brothers before or after he joined the twins, Abberline and Brokenshire helped him cover up the murder. 
Ahaha wow Uhm. I keep forgetting how I format and classify these as rambles but anyways time for some Jekyll x Jacob <3 This is just going to be in general btw so <3<3
Henry was incredibly endeared by Jacob from the moment he heard about him. Something about a tall, strong ruffian bringing justice to the streets of London (and fighting Templars) was just incredibly... Ah, attractive in Henry’s eyes. He actually allowed himself to feel that because hell, he works for the Templars and Jacob is supposed to be the enemy, Henry hates the Templars, why not be incredibly gay for the assassin?
Jacob shamelessly flirted with Henry from the first moment the met. Breaking into his office to figure out who murdered his brothers and Jacob could certainly not read the room. Henry was far too gone that he merely huffed and flirted back... Well, until they came to the topic at hand. Even in other branches were Henry was recruited by them to make poisons, or where they met in a gang fight, and Jacob still shamelessly flirts with Henry.
Jacob tries so hard to be romantic. Henry is incredibly amused by it. He will be working in his office late at night and Jacob will pop by his open window to demand attention. He will come back to his office after having ran son errands and there will be bouquets of fresh lavenders, lilacs, and tulips. Jacob will constantly “force” him (or, well, bribe him to leave his work) to go on dates with him, dates that consists of wandering the rooftops of London and watch the stars at night or have a nice dinner together. He loves to spoil Henry rotten <3
Jacob loves cuddles. Henry was not very physically affectionate at first. He was afraid that Jacob would end up doing the same thing Robert did to him and while he couldn’t keep away from him, Jacob made sure to take it slow for him. Their favorite pastime is to cuddle on one of the couches in the train after exhausting missions, and Henry finds that he can’t keep away from Jacob’s touch for too long.
Rachel and Robert began to introduce Henry into the more... Ah, illegal luxuries of the London life. They take him to a fight club and are highly confused when Henry suddenly gets incredibly excited as he watches his boyfriend kick the shit out of people. He completely abandons them and practically fall into Jacob’s (sweaty and slightly bloody) arms the moment the fighting is done. Both he and Hyde love to check out Jacob fighting in fight clubs.
(Jacob post-fight is probably the hottest sight Henry has ever seen and Jacob knows that fully well. Jacob often uses the money he wins from the fights buying gifts for his lil boyfriend <3). 
Another ideal date in the eyes of Jacob is highjacking Henry’s carriage and abducting him. It’s all fun and games until he accidentally does that when Jasper, Rachel, or Robert are in the carriage too. That was not fun for Henry to explain.
After Jacob and Evie have liberated all child factories, Henry makes a spur-of-the-moment decision to adopt Clara (the child who wanted the twins to free the children in the factories). Clara ends up getting raised by two very protective and very lovely-dovely dads. She spends most of her time in the Society (while still helping the kids on the street) but Jacob visits her and Henry a lot.
Look I just want Henry and Jacob to raise a kid that won’t come back and try to murder them later on ok.
Anyways on to some other hcs. Jacob loves to make sexual jokes to Henry. Henry either acts dumb and as if he doesn’t understand them, or he will shot them right back until Jacob is the one blushing (or highly embarrassed).
Jacob loves to break into the Society and follow Henry around but make sure he doesn’t see him. He will be parkour over the ceiling beams and all the Lodgers will notice and get extremely paranoid, trying to get Henry to notice it too because clearly something is up, Henry will completely ignore him most of the time.
Jacob rarely sleeps because his work as an assassin rarely allows him to, but once he and Henry starts dating he always makes sure to visit Henry during the night (or have Henry come to the train) so that they can cuddle and sleep together, knowing Henry won’t sleep by himself.
Henry is always the tiny spoon. Always. Jacob loves to hold him. Henry is always cold and Jacob is always warm so for Henry it’s like being wrapped in a blanket and for Jacob it’s like having an ice cube chilling down his overheated body.
Henry gets overwhelmed quite easily, both in general and with their actual relationship. As dramatic and clingy Jacob can be at times, he always gives Henry the space he needs and especially in the beginning, when everything was so new and Henry had to take his time to process everything. Jacob is always patient with him.
Henry likes to create stuff for Jacob. It can be everything from new poisons to new gadgets, to something as simple as a painting or a hand-made sweater he did himself. When the gifts became more... Simple, so to speak, he worried that Jacob wouldn’t like them, but Jacob absolutely loves and treasures anything Henry does for him, although he routinely gives the sweaters and clothing back so Henry can wear them, and so Jacob can get them back and it smells like his boyfriend <3
(Evie always finds Jacob cuddled up with the sweater in the mornings when they can’t be together. She thinks that it’s stupidly adorable).
Jacob stays in London after Evie and Green get married and move to India. He would originally have thought of leaving London to return to the Assassin Order in Crawley, but ultimately decided to stay with his lover in London. After the end events of TGS, the two of them buy a horse ranch out in the countryside where they retire. Jacob occasionally returns to London as the leader of the Rooks, and soon they begin on working to expand the gang to other cities. Henry doesn’t normally return to London, but always eagerly awaits his husbands return. By the time they have retired and moved, Clara goes to University in London, but she always makes sure to visit her dads inbetween her semesters.
They get to die a peaceful death after having lived a long and fulfilling life. Henry died first, his body having gotten weaker after many years of HJ7, and Jacob died only a few days afterward. Clara made sure they got buried in the same grave, and their little farmhouse and their belongings (and their story) has been passed down from generations ever since. 
Lydia, Jacob’s canonical granddaughter that lives through ww1, is instead Greenie’s and Evie’s grandchild for this au/ship.
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Hi, I would like to hear more about a mystery inc. buzzfeed unsolved au
you really want me to do headcanons for scooby mcfucking doo now??? fine
okay so it’s entirely Shaggy’s fault
but not on PURPOSE. He didn’t think anyone would take him seriously. He’s still not down for all this ghost hunting shit
the Gang(tm) was in the middle of their weekly routine (watching Ghost Adventurers and eating pot brownies in Daphne’s basement) and Shaggy, who was like, Far Out Man by this point, made some off hand comment that they’d be way better at ghost hunting than Zak fucking Baggins (whom he hates for legitimately no clear reason, likely stemming from a hallucination during a bad trip, but his friends find the unexplained grudge from the normally chill Shaggy hilarious and that’s why they always watch the show lmao)
anyway. he was JOKING
but when he wakes up the next morning, Fred has already created a youtube channel, contacted three different local haunted locations, and is using Daphne’s credit card to buy a shit load of equipment. alrighty.
 Daphne is All Fucking In for this idea, because she secretly never grew out of her middle school witchy girl phase, and she wants some damn validation. She’s already running a marketing campaign online and starting up a merch store. Daph. Daph it’s 8:30 in the morning. Daphne Babe I made the joke like two hours ago,
but she won’t be stopped
Scooby Doo himself abso-fucking-lutely has a legendary shitpost twitter and nobody but the gang knows an Actual Dog is running it but anyway Daphne figures out his password and starts promoting their ghost hunting show there ‘first episode dropping in a week!!!’ and it gets millions of retweets lmao
Shaggy dedicates all morning to trying to talk the two of them out of this
and when Velma finally wakes up she’s like are you guys,,,,, insane,
“Please don’t make me be the type of person who agrees with Shaggy”
at one point she was like ‘Well maybe you two can go be stupid together, this doesn’t really need to be a group thing’ but Fred and Daphne just went 🥺🥺 and her and Shaggy were like ‘Goddammit’ 
So they agree,
and by like the next damn day they’re in a decrepit building. It’s really gross. Shaggy’s desperately calling the vet to make sure Scoob is up to date on his shots gross. There’s an ominous thunderstorm. Very mood appropriate right
they’d spent the afternoon filming the bits where they learned the history of the location, because Daphne is a fast working journalist thanks, and the boys are all sufficiently spooked but Velma’s just like ‘why do I put up with all of you’ lmao
so they’re doing their walkthrough, they’ve got a mix of nice cameras and shitty shaky phone cameras, there’s a go-pro on Scobby’s head, and every single noise Velma refutes. Every single shadow she debunks. Every cold wind she hand waves away
there’s one point where Daphne is like ‘Velma honey you just need to open your mind’ and Velma is like ‘if ghosts are actually real than may God smite me where I stand’ and almost immediately the window next to her gets hit by a lightning strike and she just calmly looks up and deadpans ‘You missed’ 
during their solo walks Shaggy and Scoob come face to face with a full bodied apparition that chases them out of the house and when they’re reviewing the footage later Velma’s insisting it’s Fred in a cheap costume being a dick and Shaggy’s insisting that Fred has never successfully done anything in his life, why would he start now? And Fred is standing behind them looking offended and Daphne’s cackling off screen and anyway the first episode is a FUCKING HIT
even taking Scooby’s twitter audience into account they weren’t expecting this kind of a response 
but everyone’s obsessed with their group dynamic and how well the video managed to shift from comedy to horror so everyone’s hooked
they rush out a second episode that’s just as wild as the first
Fred, scared from seeing the footage of a legit ghost chasing Shaggy and Scoob, turns up with nun-chucks ‘‘dipped in holy water’‘ and whacks himself in the face with them while trying to show off. Daphne thinks the reported ghost looks cute in the pictures she dug up and starts getting flirty during the evp session. Fred has a great idea that they can bait the ghosts using costumes and Shaggy’s like ‘that’s the dumbest thing you’ve ever said’ and then we hardcut to Shaggy and Scooby looking like this:
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Scooby: “Rye rook rike rah dick”
Velma’s still shredding everything like she Won’t believe they even get an evp that says ‘can the chick in the glasses shut up’ ksjddfskjh
look I know traditionally mystery inc unmasks the ghosts and everything but I feel like they wouldn’t be able to post that online with their following??? I feel like that might mess up some criminal trials??? so we’re just going with the early 2000��s ghosts are real angle here, deal with it 
one time Velma says something particularly mean about the ghost’s previous life and they almost immediately pick up crying on the spirit box and Fred’s like ‘You hurt her feelings :/, tell the ghost you’re sorry Velma’ and she’s like no????? that’s clearly just a cat?? and then a rock almost hits her head but she insists it was because Scooby must’ve bumped into a shelf 
 some running gags for their fans include:
Obsessing over how Scooby can talk. Almost every Q&A video they get a question that’s just like ‘how the FUCK is the dog doing that please’ and the gang is always just like ‘What do you mean?’ and then Scooby just goes ‘Reah, rwhat ro rou mean?’ and then they just move onto the next question sdkjsdf
Velma and Shaggy making the hotdogga specifically to piss off Daphne, only instead of hotdogs it’s scooby snacks
 Daphne implying in one episode that she did, in fact, manage to successfully fuck a ghost, but she chose to exclude the footage to preserve modesty 
‘spot how many joints you can see in this episode’ 
 “Shaggy Rogers Buy A New Shirt Challenge” 
Velma once referred to Fred as the ‘communal sugar baby’ and no one is capable of moving on from that statement
one episode where Shaggy went on a five minute rant, uninterrupted, about how he could totally kick Zak Baggin’s ass. Daphne slowly pans in on his twiggy arms the more heated he gets. Zak Baggin’s retweeted the video without comment.
before episodes drop they always put up polls that are like ‘how do you think Fred’s plan will backfire this week?’ lmao
Velma’s glasses falling off right before a full bodied apparition appears before the rest of the group and since she didn’t see anything she thinks they’re talking bullshit so for like a month everyone was flooding her social media just begging her to buy some contacts
bets on what absolutely impractical but killer outfit Daphne will be wearing to a condemned building each episode 
okay I’m sorry I love this but I’m getting tired right now but anyway basically the entire dynamic of this show is:
Fred
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Scooby
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Daphne 
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Shaggy
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and Velma
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and it’s very iconic I love this idea lmao
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elisende · 4 years
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Songs in the Night (5/?)
Characters: Halsin/OMC Rating: T Words: 1620
Summary: Halsin's past finally catches up with him when the party stumbles across a ruined settlement on the Ebon Lake. He dwelt in himself like a rook in an unroofed tower -Seamus Heaney
Most of all, he missed the sun’s warmth. There was no substitute for it, or for the sweet plainsong of the birds, the wind’s touch. The air below was stale, redolent of fungal colonies and rotting bodies. Nature had found its way even here but not without its own struggle against the void, the unending dark.
It changed you. Halsin knew that, thought he’d accepted it, even moved past it. Still, he couldn’t bring himself to speak of it to Langoth, despite all they’d endured.
It had been days since they’d arrived in the Underdark; after their return from the fugue plane they’d managed to survive hook horrors, duergar, and an encounter with a bulette.
“Everything down here wants to kill us,” Astarion grumbled. “It’s all getting rather repetitive.”
“So not much of a change from the surface! Although, I’ll allow--somewhat less cheerful. At least the goblins had a sense of humor. A terrible sense of humor but it’s more than one can say for duergar.” Gale was in remarkably good spirits despite the near-disemboweling he’d suffered that morning in their fight against the hook horrors. The party wore the mantle of cheerfulness in turns, lifting each other up when it was needed, sharing the warmth of one another’s souls like prisoners sharing meagre scraps of bread.
“Have you ever heard a goblin joke, mate? Not funny.” Wyll said. He was walking point beside Halsin, his eye scanning the darkness ahead for threats as he spoke.
“But at least they make--”
“For instance. Why did the kobold cross the road?”
Gale sighed, nearly extinguishing the flame that danced on the tip of his staff. “I can’t even begin to guess. Enlighten us, Wyll.”
“He didn’t. A goblin hit him over the head and roasted him alive on a spit while his family watched.”
Langoth wrinkled his nose. Halsin was certain he’d heard a version of this ‘joke’ with a gnome in the place of the kobold. Goblins were known for their originality even less than their sense of humor.
Gale was silent for a long while. “Alright, I take your point. In some cases, no sense of humor is better.”
“What is that?” Langoth said, pushing ahead of Wyll and Halsin to look over the edge of a deep precipice. Halsin crouched beside him, squinting into the gloom. It was the Ebon Lake; he remembered it well.
“Moonrise Towers is on the other side of the lake,” he said in a low voice. The Underdark and its deadly monsters forced the habit of whispering onto you.
“How do we get there?” Langoth asked.
Halsin pointed to the outline of a jetty. “Perhaps fortune will be on our side, for once.”
“Wouldn’t that be refreshing,” Astarion muttered.
Langoth smiled faintly. “Let’s go, then.”
“Wait,” Halsin said. He’d caught sight of a ruined settlement along the edge of the shore. It had been a prosperous mine, when last he was here. Gnomish; they had aided him--meanly, it had to be said--but they’d aided him, nonetheless. A wave of nausea accompanied the memory of his escape. The burning chains, the dark, the despair. He shut his eyes a moment.
“Are you alright?” Langoth said, taking his arm in his steady, strong hand.
Halsin opened his eyes, the memory already fading. “I’m fine,” he said. “Look, there was once a settlement of some kind here. We should be cautious.”
They picked along the edges of the settlement but the gnomes who might have recognized him were gone--dead, or enslaved.
“Let’s not linger,” Halsin said. He could feel Astarion’s gaze but didn’t engage him. He didn’t want to confirm any of the vampire spawn’s suspicions.
Langoth pointed ahead to the jetty. “It’s a vessel of some kind.”
“Keep to cover,” he said. “We can’t yet guess if they’re friend or foe.”
They listened to him, thank the gods, hugging the low, ramshackle buildings around the jetty to get a closer look. A clammy sweat had broken out on his palms and forehead as memories threatened to overwhelm him again. He shouldn’t have come back.
“Are those drow?” Astarion said, his voice barely a whisper.
They were hunters and wore the weeping red eye of House Canavar; at the sight of that evil sigil, Halsin froze. Langoth’s voice seemed very distant as he said, “Do you think they’re hostile?”
“We should turn back,” Halsin said, his throat nearly closing around the words. “I know that mark.”
Astarion raised an eyebrow, watching him closely, even avidly as he asked, “How, exactly? I can’t imagine they venture to the surface often.”
“It does not matter how,” he growled. “They are no friends to us, believe me.”
“Certainly don’t look friendly,” Wyll said. The hunters paced the pitched planks of the skiff. Slavers, looking for prey. Like them.
Langoth’s piercing gaze was nearly unbearable. Finally, he said, “Very well. We’ll follow the shore west and look for another way.”
Halsin released the breath he’d been holding. “Thank you,” he whispered. Langoth touched his gauntlet, a question in his eyes. Later, he would tell him everything. After they were out of this godsforsaken place.
They retraced their steps, one by one, Halsin at the rear. Just as he was nearly around the corner of the last building, a piece of broken glass crunched under his foot. He paused midstride. The drow slavers stopped too, listening.
He didn’t dare to breathe; his position was exposed, they had only to descend onto the jetty to see him. His heart pounded as the smaller hunter strode down the edge of the skiff.
The slaver leapt onto the jetty with a thud that shook the timbers and Halsin dove back behind the building.
“Ehi! Stop!”
Too slow. The hunter drew his bow as Halsin scrambled to his feet, reaching for his club in the same motion.
Langoth appeared at his side, bow already nocked. “Don’t move,” he commanded the hunter, his voice unwavering as his arrow.
Astarion, Gale, and Wyll emerged from the shadows behind them, weapons drawn. He could weep with gratitude. He wasn’t alone, this time. Halsin drew his club.
“Golzar,” the hunter shouted to his partner. He simultaneously lowered his bow. The other drow jumped down from the skiff, his hands raised.
“We wish no quarrel with you,” the larger hunter, this Golzar, said. His skin was the violent purple of a gentian’s flower and seemed to glow in the gloom. “And you wish no quarrel with our master.”
“And who is your mistress?” Langoth said, his arrow still aimed at the hunter’s heart.
Golzar bared his teeth; they were filed to points and his wide smile was like a gleaming white saw. “Perhaps you misheard me, boy. I serve a lord. His name is Valas and his house is the most illustrious House Canavar. And he shall make bread from the dust of your bones.”
“Typical,” Astarion muttered, though despite his bravado the vampire spawn blanched.
“He will do nothing of the kind,” Langoth said. His fingers tightened on the bowstring. “We’re not easy prey, as you may have gathered.”
“Aren’t you?”
A company of drow appeared from the shadows, weapons drawn, all wearing the same sigil. Canavar. His blood chilled, even as Langoth muttered an oath under his breath. They were outnumbered, badly.
“I recognize this one,” said a huntress who had emerged from behind the burnt husk of a mill. She walked over to Halsin, her daggers trained on him. "I recognize him very well." Her face was puckered by a terrible silver scar that traversed the length of her face, chin to brow, hitching up her lips in an ugly sneer. He would not soon forget her face, though he’d never learned her name. “The master will be pleased to see you,” she said, leaning so close that Halsin could smell the spiced meat on her breath. He shuddered.
“Begone,” he whispered, his voice hoarse. “We’ll have no dealings with your master.”
“Oh, but I think you will,” the huntress said. She strolled over to stand beside Golzar, wrapping him in a casual embrace and whispering into his ear.
Langoth glanced at him again, questioning. Halsin couldn’t hold his gaze. He had to protect him from this--from his own past, which seemed determined to force itself into the present.
“You will come with us,” Golzar said. “As our esteemed guests.”
Astarion snorted. “One’s hair curls to imagine what drow hospitality entails.”
“Take me,” Halsin said, stepping forward and throwing his club to the ground in front of him. It landed with a hollow clatter that rose a small cloud of grey dust at his feet. “I’m the one your master wants.”
The drow called Golzar smiled as though he were indulging a naughty child. “Oh, no, Master Druid. That would be most unbecoming. Lord Valas will want to host all of your companions.”
Finally, he met Langoth’s eye. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, though Langoth still couldn’t know for what. He would learn all too soon.
Langoth took his hand. “We’ll face this together, too.”
Halsin shut his eyes. “There’s so much I wish I had--”
“Onto the skiff, now, grandfather. You’ll want to arrive in time for dinner--you must remember the generosity of Lord Valas’s table well.”
The other companions looked at him but he remained silent. Fury was building in him, born from an old hatred and wounds he’d wanted to believe had been healed over, like bark over the exposed pith of a tree. But something foul had flourished there, waiting.
The scarred drow watched him and smiled. When they passed to board the skiff, she stopped him and gripped his arm. Once more, she leaned close. “It’s good to have you back, Master Halsin.”
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sleepfight · 4 years
Note
fc5 questionnaire: 1, 2, 3, 4, 7, 11, 14, 19, 26, 29 oops, my hand slipped >:)c
What’s their name?
Bartholomew Esther Rook, goes by Bart.
How old are they?
23 during the events of FC5.
What’s their style like?
Messy and ratty. He hates shopping so when he finds something he likes, he will wear it until it’s literally falling apart beyond any hope of repair so most of his clothes have holes, patches, really shitty sewing, etc. He keeps it casual, usually wearing baggy hoodies, jeans, and either sneakers or hiking boots. Has a nice collection of graphic tees, most of which are from sci-fi and classic horror films as well as a denim vest covered in pins and patches of a similar style.  
What type of weapons do they prefer?
Bart is a civilian and isn’t licensed so he doesn’t pack real heat. He’s familiar-ish with firearms thanks to hanging out with Jason and Uri so much but the only “weapons” he carries are a slingshot (for knocking out security cams), a Leatherman multi-tool, and very, very occasionally homemade explosives that he gets from his neighbor Sharky.
What’s their outfit (transportation) like?
Bart is not allowed to drive for a number of reasons so his primary method of transportation is a bicycle, hitch-hiking, or mooching rides from his friends. He’s kind of an inconsiderate dick about that last option but he always brings gas money at least.  
What are their thoughts on the cult?
VERY MISINFORMED FEAR. He knows the cult is stalking him and abducting people out of Hope County but is wound up so tight in his conspiracy theory that he thinks Joseph’s doomsday prophecy is actually related to a hostile alien invasion. He spends the better part of a year investigating their activities and eventually uncovers what is really going on but by the time he’s figured it out, anyone who could help thinks he’s just crying wolf.
First thoughts on the Seed family?
Absolutely cannot stand John, thinks he’s just a pompous dickhead but also can’t help but feel a little empathy toward him since Bart went through some similar religious trauma himself. Still thinks he’s an asshole though and frequently vandalizes his ranch just because he can. They get along a little better after Bart is indoctrinated but only because Joseph demands it. During Bart’s baptism, John “allowed” Bart to keep his desert rose tattoo rather than carving it off of him and that’s the closest thing to a truce they ever really had.  
TERRIFIED of Jacob. Even before everything went down, Bart had a passing familiarity with Jacob because of Jason dragging him to Eli’s support group at the VA and has always gotten bad vibes from him. Jacob has made his distaste of Bart known as well, writing him off as a weak-minded nobody, and Bart does his best to avoid Jacob at all costs because he knows what Jacob’s ‘philosophy’ about the strong/weak is about. Even after being indoctrinated, they still don’t like each other and Jacob resents the importance Joseph places on Bart’s role.
He really didn’t know what to make of Joseph at first. Every interaction he had with the man was pleasant if not a little touchy and weird, but Bart was too distrustful to fall for Joseph’s charisma and kept him at arm’s length despite Joseph’s repeated attempts at getting closer to Bart. The longer he investigated, Bart became more and more disturbed by what he found, eventually developing a healthy fear of Joseph that kept him relatively safe until one bad fight with Jason drove Bart over the edge. He tried to infiltrate Eden’s Gate to prove once and for all that Joseph was behind the disappearances in Hope County but Joseph was expecting him and Bart became the man who gets his eyes gouged out in the video that the deputy watches on the chopper ride into Peggie country. Joseph handles Bart’s indoctrination personally and lavishes attention and love and awful pain on Bart until Bart holds an almost god-like reverence for him. He breaks him until Bart’s mind is an empty vessel and he imprints on him like a child, shaping a new identity that revolves around Joseph.
Bart and Faith were friends as teenagers back when Faith was still Rachel. Both were homeless at the time and living out of a shelter, both struggling with deeply personal issues like gender/sexuality and drug addiction. They both did their best to support the other and even though the relationship was a little toxic sometimes, they really did care for each other and Bart was devastated when she disappeared. He didn’t realize she was involved with Eden’s Gate until after he was captured and Faith ultimately played an instrumental role in getting him on their side because he was so, so happy that she was okay. After his indoctrination, they maintain a very close friendship again but Faith has some envy issues with how much attention Bart gets from Joseph and she worries that Bart is going to replace her.  
From the Police department who do they get along with?
Bart and the Hope County Sheriff’s Department have a very tumultuous relationship. Bart constantly gets picked up for petty crimes and has ZERO respect for the cops but since he’s so close with Jason, Whitehorse usually just throws him in the tank until Jason can take him home rather than actually book him for anything. So he and Whitehorse have sort of Wile E. Coyote and Road Runner relationship where they are mortal enemies that never actually do anything serious. Bart used to have a pretty big crush on Staci but Staci was an asshole about it so now Bart is just kind of shy and awkward around him but not outwardly hostile unless Staci is the one arresting him. Joey is the only one he shows any amount of respect to and that’s only because she brings him coffee when he’s in lock-up and because Jason mentors her. She’s the only one he won’t bite during an arrest.
How do they feel about Faith?
Basically answered above!
What do they feel about Joseph?
Answered above!
How do they feel at the end of all the game events?
Bart himself does not actually go through any of the events in the game with most of his story taking place before and after the canon story. And all four Seeds survive to the bunker in my version of events. By the time the game ends, Bart has been thoroughly broken by his indoctrination and while he is very afraid of the nukes, he is also elated to have a family that loves him now and thinks Joseph did everything right and they are all only alive because Joseph and the others saved them. He buys into Joseph’s prophecy without question and feels nothing but joy about everything that happened, including his own torture, at least until they have to wean him off of his bliss drip and reality settles in during detox. They have to keep him doped up almost constantly in order to maintain that level of Stockholm syndrome.
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lacklusterswirl · 5 years
Text
Montagne’s Protection
Montagne woke up in a cell with his hands and feet bound. Just when he thought things couldn’t get worse... well, they do.
aka Angst for a friend on their request :) (~2.9k words)
Warnings: Hostage, child injuries, injuries, death, waterboarding, gun fights/gun violence, mission gone wrong.
“Montagne!” Twitch’s scream echoed across an empty field all the way to Glaz’s ear.
Through his scope, he watched in horror as they dragged the unconscious man to a truck. He shot at a few of the men, killing them instantly, but he couldn’t keep up with the sheer number of them.
“Glaz! Track the truck!” Thatcher’s orders came through and Glaz quickly locked in the bullet, aiming for his own teammate.
Breathe in. Hold fire. Breathe out. Between heartbeats just like he practiced.
A heavy voice came through, “I have a signal.” He has never felt so pleased to hear Thermite’s voice as he was in that moment.      
.
His eyes opened without him knowing. It was hard to tell when he was awake or asleep when everything was dark. Slowly, his eyes got used to the darkness, and he could make out bars in front of him. With a grunt, he got himself up onto his elbows. He couldn’t help but groan at the pain in his chest as he turned to the side. He didn’t remember much, other than the pain of the impact from getting thrown to the side after a C4 was tossed at them. His shield… Le Roc was missing. He flexed his hands and relaxed a little at the feeling of armoured pads on himself.
“Merde.”
But then he saw his helmet tossed on the ground with his balaclava beside it… so they knew his face. This would prove problematic then. There were two parts to secrecy for him, one, his face, the other, his name. And his dog tags were gone too.
He stayed lying on that cold, concrete floor in that half-awake state, wondering if he could even move properly. All around him, and even in his own mind, he could see darkness, and the tendrils reaching out and grasping onto his arms. Perhaps if he stayed even more still, they would pass him, and he would wake up to his friends smiling down at him.
That’s not what happened.
Instead, he woke up next with chains around his arms and feet, and realized that he was no longer on the floor. He laid there, spread out, and defenseless against those white masks and their cruel eyes.
“Giles “Montagne” Touré. I see why they call you mountain now.”
The man who was speaking was wearing a mask with the word ‘muse’ painted on it in red, dripping down the mask like blood. God he just hoped it wasn’t his blood. Muse nodded his head, and a table of tools was brought out for him to look at. There were whips, car batteries, and an array of differently-sized knives – each with their own purpose he’s sure.
“Putain,” he growled, tugging on his chains. Nothing moved, as he should’ve seen coming.
Muse stalked his way from where Montagne’s feet were, all the way so he was right above his head. “You special force guys are all the same. You glare until you close your eyes, and then you all die without saying anything. Boring. But what is fun, is seeing what exactly you’re scared of.”
There was a hissing noise, and the white masks all leave. A light, sweet scent came in and soon, all Montagne could see were the flowery fields he played soccer on as a young boy. He can feel the petals on his fingertips as he bent down to pick one for his mother.
Maman… pour toi…
A cold splash on his face, and he wakes up and realizes that he’s being held at an angle. And he knows what coming next.
“How did you find us? Who did Rainbow have on the inside?”
Montagne held his tongue and breathed. The water that came over his face felt like it was going to fill him up completely, going in through his nose so he coughs, but then get more water through his mouth as he does so.
And it’s a pattern. Right as he’s about to pass out, it stops. A question gets asked again, and he gives that same glare. Then the water starts again. He didn’t know how long it had been, but when it finally stopped, he was left passed out on the floor, in a puddle of the water that remained.
If only he were laying face down.
The next thing he hears is the crying voice of a young girl. When… wh—it dawned on him. This wasn’t a dream. He woke up to see the silhouette of a young girl sitting in the opposite corner of him. When he stirred, she screamed, causing the thundering of feet to come down the stairs.
It wasn’t Muse this time. It was his little henchmen who were too afraid to approach Montagne when he was awake, and had apparently went on their own little trip just now.
“I told you we should’ve taken the boy. He was much older. He wouldn’t be causing such a shit storm at night. We’ll be found out if this keeps happening.”
“Shut up, you know that girls sell for more. We need the money.”
“Fuck man, not worth if we… HEY!”
Montagne had half crawled, and half stumbled his way over to where the girl was cowering from him.
“Shhhh, mon chérie… restes ici. Tu peux dormis maintenant. Je te protège.” And she calmed down to a sniffle when she realized that this giant man wasn’t here to hurt her. He pet her hair and whispered as he saw out of the corner of his eye, what the terrorists were grabbing. He barely had time to mentally prepare himself for—
THONK
—that. It didn’t hurt that much through all the armour he wore, but it still made him collapse back on to the ground. The metal bat clattered to the ground and the other terrorist started scolding the first for causing the girl to cry again.
“As long as he’s not causing us trouble. Two birds, one stone.”
“Alright,” a little wad of spit landed next to Montagne, “just know that if you do anything wrong… well, the people who buy from us don’t mind a few… beauty marks’”
Montagne gritted his teeth, but stayed still. Once the footsteps faded again, he pulled away and started treating her for injuries. They were mainly a few scratches here and there, but otherwise, she was alright. She spoke neither English nor French so he just hummed when he wanted her to sleep.
Perhaps getting to know the girl was the wrong choice. Well, not perhaps. It seems to be that it WAS the wrong choice. Every time he fought back, nearly escaped, or broke free, she would be held at gun or knife point, and he had to give up his fight for her. He took punches, shielded her with his own body when they threw things at her, and just kept up the hope that his team would come back for him.
.
“Location confirmed.” Twitch was typing on a laptop as they were on their way to the location where they had finally located them. The pings from the tracker led them all over the world until they realized that Montagne didn’t have his shield anymore. From the cell the got the information from they formed a mixed-team op, with support from JTF 2 since the actual location was near an abandoned cottage near Lake Simcoe. Twitch just got confirmation from local law enforcement, and here they were.
Ciel was frowning while re-reading mission details with a cold intensity in his eyes that was so off putting, that it made Twitch keep quiet again. Tap tap… tap tap… The tap tap that was staring again was from Rook this time as he kept looking between Lion and Doc. Even Pulse was looking down at his feet instead of making jokes like normal. The sixth Rainbow op sat with his sniper ready, and a wave of guilt coming off of him that was so strong that he couldn’t look anyone in the eye.
Even if he wasn’t Rainbow, Ciel was team leader of this group. And it was time for him to say something.
“Tell me about this man. Why does he mean so much to you all?”
.
“You let her go, putain, and I will consider putting a bullet only in your head when I get free.”
The girl’s right arm was trapped in a grip so tight, that Montagne could see purple edges starting to form. She was fighting against it, but it was no use.
“Our first client has asked about her,” came the snide reply.
Then, they turned back and walked upstairs, ignoring the rattling sound as it felt like Montagne was shaking the very prison itself.
“Merde,” he muttered, but now was not the time. A glint caught his eye in the dim room. The keys were on a table instead of on the wall like normal. They were out of arms reach when he stretched it out though. What to do, what to do… He still had his armour plates. He fashioned a rope-like object that he then managed to slide the entire table over to him, weakened muscles straining the entire time.
With a hope in his heart he hasn’t felt in what must’ve been days, he unlocked his door and slowly crept out. There were no weapons on the table, but no matter. He made his way up the stairs and heard footsteps immediately to his right. He plastered himself up against the wall and watched as the shadow crept up, more and more. Only one… perfect.
He wrapped his arms around the man’s neck and snapped it, quickly moving the body into the bushes. The bastard only had a knife and pistol on him though. No matter, he heard cries coming from the little girl upstairs, and he followed them through the hallways until he ended up beside the room. With his ear to the wall, he started listening in on their conversation.
“They did what?!” An unknown voice boomed loud enough that Montagne didn’t actually need to be near the wall to hear their conversation.
“We’ve started a self-destruct code because this facility has been found by JTF 2—”
“How?”
“Sir, we need to you follow us. We can guarantee your safety and anonymity, but we need to leave before the building collapses.”
“And her?”
“We’ll take her too. You’ll get your money’s worth.”
The building rumbled, and the footsteps inside quickened their pace, matching his heartbeat as he stood by the door, knife in one hand, and a pistol in the other. The first man rushed out, and received a knife to the chest. He was dead before Montagne even revealed himself. He reached out for the dead man’s chest and used him as a shield while he pushed forward and shot the last two men down. The girl was back near the door, trembling, but alive. She looked Montagne in the eye, and even though he was covered in hot blood that was quickly cooling down and creating a sticky coat over his body, she hugged him.
“Come here.”
“我们去哪里啊?” Oh, how he wished he could learn another language…
“Je comprend pas…” he carefully carried her, making sure not to squeeze the bruises on her skin.
The shaking got stronger to the point where Montagne couldn’t walk properly.
Then, the ceiling fell.
Montagne curled his body around hers and knelt right there.
.
“What do you mean it collapsed?”
Their vehicles were moving still, despite needing to travel over the heavy layers of snow. Of all the times Glaz has met the Canadian Special Forces officer, this is the angriest he’s seen him.
“Get me a new line, and more back up, we’re taking the jets when we get to Checkpoint B.”
At the mention of jets, all JTF 2 ops stood up and gathered their equipment. Ciel turned and nodded at Doc.
“You’re with me, doctor. Rest of you, pair up and follow my guys. The situation’s… bad. The building has collapsed, and we can’t find your friend. Cham, take Pulse with you, Draco, take the sniper. We’re in the lead. Rest of you follow when you can.”
The JTF 2 ops got out of the stopped truck, which was slowing down more and more due to the prolonged snowfall, and ran over to snowmobiles. Ciel, with Doc holding onto him, raced off, far outpacing the rest of the ops. If the situation was less tense, he’s sure Doc would be terrified, but as they whizzed past all the others, Glaze could only see a glare on the doctor’s face.
He was third out of Rainbow to arrive on scene. Doc and Pulse were already scanning the area while the JTF 2 ops could be heard in the background, firing at remaining terrorist forces.
“Sniper, find a position. Help your friends,” his JTF 2 partner said before making the call to join up with Ciel and the other man. Glaz did so and moved to higher ground so he could use his scope to help him find his teammate.
Breathe in. Hold fire. Breathe out. Keep looking just like he was told to do.
Just as he saw the bright yellow outline, Pulse shouted, “DOC!” The rest of Rainbow, including the machinery and JTF 2 ops returned arrived on scene, and everyone reconvened where the Canadians were performing an extraction, with a worried Rook part of the team, giving advice where he could.
“Ciel…” Glaz murmured… The last time he felt so… so much… it was that cold gaze that was there to help him. This time was no different. He felt a warm hand on his shoulder, and a presence that has always said more than his words.
“I heard about what happened the night of. You did your best, but those forces were too much. Good job getting a tracker on at all actually.” It wasn’t helping. “Keep watch if needed.” If you don’t want to see for yourself. That’s what he really meant. And Glaz was tempted to take the offer.
With one last heave, the extraction team managed to get a large enough hole to shine a light down. Immediately, a small whimper came out, and a word that tugged on the edges of Glaz’s memory.
“救命啊!”
Ciel was first to launch into action, and despite Glaz’s guilt over what was happening, he understood the voice. The two of them watched as Doc reached his arms down the hole and came back up with a young girl. She was bloodied, eye-half lidded, and an arm and a leg were sticking up at angles that shouldn’t have been possible. The tears on her cheeks were caught in the light of their flashlights, and she strained away from everyone, including Doc, who was doing his best to carry her away.
“你没事吧??” the Rainbow ops all looked over at Ciel who now had the girl’s full attention.
“叔叔还在下门.”
“Ciel?” Doc was waiting on a response.
“Uncle’s still down there,” he murmured, helping Doc place her onto a stretcher. To the girl, he whispered something, and gave Glaz a look.
“你好,” Glaz said, speaking a language he remembers learning a few years ago.
Ciel gave him a nod and Glaz followed as the girl was led off.
Doc, Pulse, and a few more JTF 2 ops were still trying to look into the hole. Glaz and the girl watched from the back near the jets until Doc broke down. He was on his knees and frozen still.
“Get her away, Glaz” Rook had taken a step back, and gave the duo a look, and Glaz just knew who this ‘uncle’ was.
But it was Twitch who gave it away, who was now sobbing into the arms of Lion. Even the arrogant, haughty Lion looked shaken by the view.
Glaz didn’t see anymore that night, but when they debriefed the next day with JTF 2, he saw it all. Rock smashed into the skull, bits of brain mixed in with the helmet on the floor, metal pipes speared through the body, even with the armour, and a shape any of them could easily recognize. A fetal position with his arms wrapped around something… or someone. The gun and knife found on him didn’t belong to him, but the marks on his wrists showed that he was indeed a prisoner. So, they pieced together the story from the pictures and the testimony of the little girl.
Montagne was already in a cell when the girl got there. He protected her, and helped her. When the ‘bad men’ took her away to another man, he came up and killed them all. Then, on their way to the door, the building collapsed. That was all the girl managed to get out before shock took over adrenaline, and she entered a surgical room, never to be seen by Glaz again.
It was the long way of saying that Montagne was dead. And no one could help him in his final hours.
.
Montagne felt the first pieces of rubble hit him, and then an immediate pain in his right shoulder. He curled tighter around the girl and looked up just in time to see a slab of the ceiling fall down on them.
I hope I did enough.
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kiruuuuu · 6 years
Text
Oneshot in which pure chaos happens. There’s some Blitz/Rook and a tiny bit of Doc/Jäger and Monty/Bandit but they’re certainly not the main focus of the story - which is, as I said, chaos. So, uh. Good luck. (Rating T, nothing but humour, ~2.5k words) - written for @magehir to cheer you up and cheer you on ❤ You’ve survived thus far, you can make it another year!
.
It’s odd, coming back to Hereford after an extended vacation. Over the years, Blitz has accepted several places as his home, among them his parents’ house, the apartments in which he lived, the GSG9 headquarters, the base of the CTU in India he helped build from the ground up (which he just visited) and now he apparently needs to add Hereford to that list – because even while just approaching the familiar structures, he can feel the corners of his mouth lifting in anticipation. He’s heard from Bandit that most operators are off-duty today following an unfortunate incident which was not further described to him mostly because Bandit was laughing too hard. Apparently it involved large amounts of food dye, flour and hair dryers and made a lot of people very upset.
On the upside, this means that Blitz has the chance to catch up with everyone and see how they’re faring – he’s been gone for three weeks now and actually missed his co-workers, as odd as it sounds. With how much time they spend together, he’s come to know all of them to a certain degree where he feels comfortable in their presence, happy to know they have his back no matter what. Therefore, when he steps through the door into the building, he’s not prepared to be confronted with Fuze in a dress first thing.
They make brief eye contact before Blitz stops in his tracks to take in the entire disaster, the pale orange sundress fluttering behind the Uzbek as he stomps through the hallway with purpose, matching shoes dangling from his fingers and hot pink lipstick smeared as he fixes the newly arrived German with a short death glare as if he personally was responsible for his outfit. As he stalks past, he mutters a quiet kill me before leaving. Blitz stares after him, aghast, until a different noise catches his attention and shifts it from what he’s pretty sure must’ve been a hallucination to the nearest corner.
Kapkan seems to be leading his countrymen after Fuze while babbling in animated yet quite noticeably slurred Russian though he freezes comically as soon as he spots Blitz, the other three almost crashing into him and also stilling as if Blitz’ vision was based on movement and them being glued to the spot somehow allowed them to escape the German’s anticipated wrath – that’s what they seem to expect of him, going by Kapkan’s quiet curse, followed by a stage whispered: “It’s the police!” The bright pink lip print on his cheek only furthers the deranged look of the small group’s leader.
Blitz is beginning to wonder whether the Spetsnaz stole some of Bandit’s special brownies. “What is -”
“Scatter!”, Finka yells out of the blue and just like that, the Russians attempt to run off into different directions which only Tachanka and Glaz manage – Kapkan and Finka collide forcefully and collapse to the ground in a violently cursing heap, quite clearly assigning the blame to each other.
Thoroughly concerned now, Blitz approaches them and asks: “What’s going on? Are you alright?”
“No! He fucking won Miss Russia and he’s not even Russian!”, Kapkan spits back inexplicably, gets up and dusts himself off.
“You know he looked better in that bathing suit than you did, Maxim”, Finka addresses him with a saucy wink and then hurries after him when he merely huffs and, with a dramatic hair toss, struts away.
Blitz is dumbstruck. Maybe he’s in the twilight zone. Maybe that’s what’s going on. Shaking his head, he steps into the canteen to hopefully find some normalcy elsewhere. At first glance, it seems the few people scattered around the tables are having a relaxed though late lunch, yet when he looks a tad more closely, everyone’s eyes flit back and forth from their conversation partner to two women occupying the kitchen.
“Would you like some more coffee, dear sister?”, Ela chirps pleasantly.
“Oh, thank you so much for being this observant, I’d love to!”, Zofia replies just as politely.
Horrified, Blitz watches as the two fawn over each other in a sickly sweet tone of voice he usually hears Thatcher apply when a recruit is in Big Trouble – these two, however, seem intent on keeping up their charade at all costs. He thinks he can see Ela grit her teeth even at this distance. As there’s no explanation for this either, he turns on his heel and continues his search for something or someone who can restore or at least feign the status quo. At this point, he’d pick Bandit being his usual shithead self over everything he’s come across so far because his entire world view is crumbling and being insulted as well as kicked in the shins actually sounds quite appealing to him now.
Filled with despair, he seeks out Bandit’s usual spots but comes up empty until he finally spots him in the workshop. Even so, seeing him almost makes Blitz leave immediately because – because Bandit’s smiling. Not a smirk full of schadenfreude, no malicious grin or a chuckle full of pity, none of the sort, it’s a genuine, bright, beautiful smile. Blitz considers briefly whether he’s high but concludes that the amount necessary to lighten Bandit’s mood to a point where he’d consider smiling to be a sensible course of action would likely kill him first, so he approaches cautiously. “Hey”, he says.
Bandit and Montagne turn to him with matching expressions of authentic joy and Blitz is briefly reminded of any twins appearing in horror films he now regrets ever having watched. “Elias, it’s so good to see you!”, Montagne greets him and Bandit adds: “How are you? I hope you’re well!”
He blinks at what can only be a mirage and fights down the urge to reach out and test whether his fingers would just glide through the seemingly solid men. “I’m a little shaken”, he admits and finds no shame in hearing his voice waver, “and I’d appreciate it if either of you could pinch me.”
The two exchange a glance as if Blitz was the one behaving oddly. “Are you alright, friend?”, Bandit wants to know without any sarcasm or instantly jumping at the chance to cause him physical harm and no. Just no. This is – this is too odd.
As soon as he’s fled the workshop in a panic, he goes over the possibilities: they’ve all gone insane. Blitz has gone insane. Some unknown entity has infiltrated Rainbow and substituted all its operators with outwardly perfect copies yet failed to make them understand how their originals behaved. This seems to be the likeliest option from everything he’s seen and if he’s honest, he’s beginning to wish he was back in India where life was uncomplicated and not filled with obviously impossible scenarios.
For now, he decides to unpack his things in his room and possibly go to sleep at two in the afternoon, being able to blame it on jetlag and hoping everything is back to how it used to be when he’s awake again. Still vaguely dazed, he opens his door and comes face to face with – well, he’s not sure how to accurately describe it as Jäger and Doc are so wrapped around each other that it’s hard to tell who is inside whom and with which body part exactly and Jesus Christ. Slapping a hand over his eyes, he yells: “That’s my damn bed, Marius!!”
“Oh”, says Doc in soft astonishment. “You’re back today already.”
“Could you two maybe -” A throaty moan interrupts him momentarily. “At least stop while I’m talking to you!”
“We’re almost done”, Jäger responds pleasantly and the following noises are even audible after Blitz has slammed the door shut behind him.
Okay. So there’s no place that’s sacred and no one who’s unaffected, apparently, which means he should either try to find out whether their boss at least has escaped this – whatever it is, or run for the hills. Maybe the SAS would accept him into their ranks. Then a thought occurs to him. If everyone is behaving oddly, it means…
Rook seems normal, from what he can tell. He’s wearing his usual cheerful expression and doing that eager nod Blitz finds so endearing, and seeing him is a relief. He missed the young Frenchman but despite this wasn’t sure whether contacting him during his leave could be misconstrued in a way – he doesn’t want to seem needy or pushy, so he opted for deciding that their long talks short before he left indicated no more than friendship and is now looking forward to continuing them to possibly cement this friendship. Approaching him with a heart made lighter by his presence only, he’s about to address him when he belatedly realises to whom he’s talking. It’s Lion of all people. And the two are both making friendly conversation.
Dumbfounded, he hears himself say: “Can someone just fucking pinch me?”
The next thing he knows is a sharp pain in his cheek, right where Rook slapped him with enough force to knock his head aside and make him stumble, courtesy as much of the blow itself as its unexpected nature. He doesn’t even get a chance to react or begin processing the shock before Rook takes his head in both hands and murmurs: “Oh fuck oh shit oh no, are you alright? I’m – that wasn’t – I’m so sorry, please believe me, I have no idea where that came from, oh god, did I hurt you?”
Blitz blinks the tears away forming in his eyes from the dull, throbbing ache in his probably crimson cheek and, like a true liar, shakes his head. “No, I’m fine”, he replies quietly, stunned, “that was – I mean, at least now I know I’m not dreaming because that hurt like hell.”
“I really didn’t mean to, I’m very sorry”, Rook assures him, guilt clearly written on his face and bleeding through the gentle touches of him petting Blitz’ hair as if he was an upset dog.
“You really were ready for that slap though”, Lion comments and sounds entirely too amused.
“Look -”, Rook starts but Blitz shakes his head and talks over him: “I think I should see Seamus.”
Sledge, indubitably, is an immovable rock in Rainbow’s endless tides of madness: reliable, always professional and nothing but competent. Surely, he’ll know what’s going on and be able to shed some light on the various horrors Blitz has encountered, none of which he’s been able to process so far. Hopeful that this bastion of normalcy has withstood whatever devastated the rest of the base, Blitz knocks on the door to his office and enters after being called in.
Sledge is blue.
Wordlessly, Blitz turns around and is halfway out the door again when a deep sigh and a small wait hold him back. “I’m sure Dom told you of his hilarious prank.”
Oh. He remembers – extremely potent food dye. Hesitantly, he takes a seat opposite of someone who looks like an unfortunate extra in the world’s first live action smurf film. “I think I fell into an alternate dimension”, Blitz states matter-of-factly. When Sledge merely raises an eyebrow, Blitz recounts his experiences one by one and notes how the grin on the Scotsman’s lips widens progressively.
“There are perfectly reasonable explanations for most of this. Alex offered to provide lunch for his team today but didn’t have any cooking wine, so he used, uh, Adriano’s Absinthe. Which as you probably know has about 60% more alcohol content than wine.”
“That must’ve tasted revolting.”
“It did. They loved it. The result was a spontaneously staged Miss Russia contest in which Lera was the only judge, ironically. You got to see the aftermath, I’m afraid.”
Blitz puts his head into his hands.
“Ela and Zofia have a bet going with James about how long they can be nice to each other. And if you ask me, everyone’s hoping for him to win because that’d mean they can stop treading on eggshells around the two sisters as they’re bound to explode any minute and no one particularly wants to be around them when they do – but it’s better than the fight over the prize money should they actually win.”
“They did seem ready to rip each other’s heads off, yeah.”
“If you asked me, I’d say this only widens the rift between them. But no one asked me. And so I’m only going to make sure I’ll be far away when it eventually happens.”
“What about Dom? I’ve never seen him so -”
“He’s got the biggest crush I’ve ever seen on Gilles.”
“You’re kidding.”
“I wish I was. He’s been all smiles and it’s freaking everyone out to the point where I feel I should intervene but I can hardly tell him to fall out of love. The other day Mark walked past him three times and not once did Dom try to trip him. It’s a miracle.”
Blitz doesn’t even know how to react to this because it’s utterly absurd.
“In any case, since Julien often hung around with Dom when you weren’t around and Olivier could be usually found in Gilles’ presence, they’ve both been robbed of their confidant and therefore have started talking to each other.”
“You say this as if it was nothing.”
“It is nothing. They’ve overcome their differences and found shared interests.”
“What about Doc and Marius then?”
Sledge purses his lips pensively. “I have no idea, to be honest. I thought they were just friends and I’m still convinced they’re no more than that. Why they would – do what you, uh, tried to describe them doing, is beyond me. Maybe they were both feeling horny. It’s not unheard of that two guys help each other now and then, right?” Helplessly, Blitz just shrugs and tries to parse all this new information. “Is that all?”
“Well, I don’t think it falls under ‘strange’, because it seemed like an accident, but Julien slapped me. I might’ve asked him to pinch me but he -”
“I’m not surprised. You did tell him you liked him too before you left and then proceeded to ignore him for three weeks. I think he has all reason to be miffed.”
Oh. Blitz’ eyes widen. Oh. Oh fuck oh shit oh no. He thought it was – it was meant in a friendly way, not – “I need to go”, he tells Sledge hurriedly but turns around once more before running out of the office: “Please never go on vacation. Please never leave me alone for this long.”
And Sledge just casually inspects his really quite blue hands and replies calmly: “Oh, I don’t know. A drawn-out holiday doesn’t sound too bad, actually.”
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myriadimagines · 6 years
Text
Preference: Star Wars (Rogue One)
How They React If You Died First On Scarif
Characters: Chirrut Imwe, Baze Malbus, Bodhi Rook, Cassian Andor, Jyn Erso
Warnings: Death and violence
Request: “Can I request a preference of what the Rogue One crew would do if they saw you die first during the battle of Scarif” - anonymous
A/N: Um???? How dare you?? 2 years after this movie came out and I’m still trying to recover and you hit me with this??? And I know everyone was scattered on Scarif but for the sake of this preference we’re going to pretend that somehow everyone’s together.
“I’ve got the plans!” Jyn yelled, pressing her finger to her communications device in her ear. Nodding at Cassian, she continued to tell the rest of the team, “We have to get to the top of the communications tower to transmit them!” 
“We’re outside!” you responded, your voice barely crackling through the device over the sounds of gunfire and explosions. “We’ll cover you!”
Cassian and Jyn were quick to escape and exit the storage rooms, finding themselves in the midst of the battle. They could see the ship they arrived in, where Bodhi was inside, scrambling to try and disable the force field. The communications tower was across the beach, and Jyn stared in horror at the AT-AT approaching. She could see Chirrut and Baze in the middle of the battlefield, shooting down troops, and you suddenly rushed up to her, grabbing her arm as you instructed, “You and Cassian stay behind me, I’ll clear a path!” 
The two nodded, not having any time to argue, and you gripped your blaster before running across the beach, firing at anyone in your way. Cassian and Jyn backed you up, and with Chirrut and Baze’s additional backup the three of you had almost made it. 
You turned around to make sure that Jyn and Cassian had kept up, and your expression fell when you noticed a stormtrooper had managed to sneak up from behind. He had pulled a grenade from his belt, and you watched in horror as it started to beep as it landed right behind Cassian. Knowing there was no time to outrun it, you pushed Cassian aside and curled your body over it, screwing your eyes shut as you hoped this would save your friends. 
Your name: submit What is this?
Chirrut Imwe
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Chirrut could hear everything around him. From the sounds of blasters, the heavy footprints of the AT-AT’s, and your shouts to warn Cassian of the grenade Chirrut had heard land at his feet. Chirrut’s expression fell as he heard the subsequent explosion, as well as Jyn and Cassian yell your name. Chirrut felt something in his heart break, hearing the anguish and pain in Jyn and Cassian’s voice, the kind of pain which meant that you were gone.
Bowing his head, Chirrut seemed to drown out the sounds of violence around him as he pressed his forehead onto his staff, screwing his eyes shut as he could recall the sound of your voice.
“You are one with the Force now, y/n.” Chirrut whispered. “You are one with the Force.” 
Baze Malbus
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Baze roared out your name as he saw you fling yourself on the grenade. Baze wanted to do something, anything, yet he knew there was nothing that could be done. He could only watch in horror as the explosion went off, taking your life with it.
The minute the explosion settled, he grabbed his gun and fired relentlessly at the stormtrooper who threw the grenade. Overcome with anger, Baze grabbed his rocket launched and fired at the AT-AT that was approaching, needing a way to vent his grief. 
He glanced over to where you were, a small part of him unrealistically hoping that you were standing there. But when he saw nothing but a crater, he gritted his teeth in anger as he fired at any remaining stormtroopers in Jyn and Cassian’s path. There was still a mission to be completed. He would have to mourn after it was finished. 
Bodhi Rook
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Bodhi looked out of the ship, cheering to himself and pumping his fist in the air when he saw that you, Jyn and Cassian had almost made it across the beach to the communications tower. He saw the stormtrooper behind you before you did, and Bodhi didn’t even have time to yell a warning before he pulled out a grenade. Bodhi watched helplessly as you tossed yourself on top of it, just before it exploded.
Bodhi fell to his knees, and he felt something get stuck in his throat as he realised that just in an instant, you were gone. You were so close, Bodhi realised, and tears welled in his eyes as he heard Jyn let out an anguished scream. 
“y/n...” Bodhi whispered, your name now a ghost on his tongue. The horrible realization of your death seemed to sink in further, and Bodhi croaked out, “Oh God, no...”
Cassian Andor
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Cassian had heard something clatter behind him before you ran towards him, pushing him forward, hard. Cassian tumbled onto the ground as he saw you jump on top of the grenade. His eyes widened in horror as he yelled, “y/n, no!”
He lunged towards you, not thinking clearly, but the grenade had already gone off. The explosion was still enough to knock him backwards, but it was not nearly as big as it would’ve been had you not blocked it. Cassian stared at where you were in shock, before screwing his eyes shut. He didn’t know whether he was feeling grief or anger, but he felt something inside of him was lost. 
Gritting his teeth, he forced himself up as he pulled an equally shocked Jyn to her feet. Knowing you would want the squad not to waste time mourning you and to keep fighting, he pushed her towards the communications tower and roared, “Keep going!” 
Jyn Erso
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When you suddenly started running in the opposite direction, Jyn had no idea what was coming. She then registered the grenade at Cassian’s feet, and just as you pushed him aside, she knew that you were sacrificing yourself. 
“y/n!” she screamed, but it was already too late. Jyn could feel tears stinging her eyes as the fire and dust settled, and just like that, you were gone. She felt frozen in place as she stared at the crater the grenade had left. Hot, angry tears streamed down her face -- the Empire had taken so much from her. Her family, her friends, and now you. 
Cassian was the one who finally forced her to move, pulling her to her feet as he yelled at her to keep going. Finally letting her emotions get the better of her, she angrily gripped her blaster as she let out a frustrated scream, turning around and ruthlessly firing at the stormtroopers ahead of her. She was going to make the Empire pay. 
tags: @proudchocolateaddict / @myfriendmagislit / @dragon4123 / @fire--pheonix / @willingtofightformyhappyending ↳ want to be added to the tag list?
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kariachi · 6 years
Text
Another commission! This time over 11k of Martin Mystery/Ben 10 crossover for @thenixkat.
A young man walks calmly through the forest. It’s been a nice afternoon, so far- hot and muggy with little cloud cover to prevent the summer sun from streaming through the trees. There’s a notable lack of birdsong, and just a quarter mile down the path he’d found a crow lying on the concrete, but he’s not worried. It’d winged off as soon as he nudged it with his shoe. Anyway, birds were supposed to call when predators were around, and if something was wrong in the park surely an alert would’ve been put out by now. It’s too nice of a day to waste time worrying over nothing.
Something glints in the sunlight, off to the side of a curve in the path near a large outcropping of rock and the man’s curiosity gets the better of him. A glass bottle maybe? Some loser littering out here, ruining things for the wildlife and the guests? He comes closer, hand resting on the stone, focused on the shining object. Yes, definitely a loser, but not as much a loser as him. After all, anyone littering here probably has a job, an education, a lover, isn’t living in their parents’ basement like he is. They’ve never ruined everything for everybody, but he has, hasn’t he? Just one failure after another starting with being born at all, such a waste….
He’s so caught in his own head, he doesn’t even see the teeth.
~~
“-but of course the police don’t believe them, because what civilian cop is going to believe the person in the house you were breaking into was murdered by donuts-”
“Hey guys!”
“Oh thank God.” Diana just about collapsed with relief right on the moving walkway at their alien friend’s timely arrival. Martin had been talking about this movie for two days and now that he’d realized she wasn’t going to watch it with him he’d decided to just recap the entire fucking thing. “Hi Billy.”
“Hi Billy.”
“Hey Billy!” The grin on Martin’s face could not be removed, only turned to new victims. “I was just telling Diana about this new movie that came out- Attack of the Killer Donuts.”
“Ooo,” Billy grinned back, “sounds interesting.”
“It is! It’s got almost all the classic B-horror tropes! I’ll stream it for you after we get back from this mission.”
“Speaking of which,” Diana interrupted before her only shot at a moment without breakfast foods as a main topic vanished into the ether (Java wasn’t helping, he’d given up and watched the film within the first two hours and was now on Martin’s side, the traitor), “any idea what we’re getting into?”
“MOM’s got the details,” the alien said, “but I do know Osmosians are involved, so I printed off these pamphlets.” As he spoke he distributed the pieces of paper. The whole team’s brows raised as one at the first item listed. ‘Bring food.’ “Security Chief Jones was involved in their original production, so you can trust the information to be accurate.”
“Uh, thanks, Billy.” They were all still focused on the pamphlets, reading through the surprisingly short list of safety tips. They mostly seemed to boil down to ‘don’t let them get hungry’ and ‘don’t piss them off’.
“Don’t worry, Eva says they’re really nice people.”
~~
For once MOM didn’t appear to have some experiment going, no guests hanging around, and Martin was visibly thrown off by it. Instead she was checking three backpacks stuffed to the brim with gear, from water canteens hanging off the sides to what were probably area maps and what looked like way too much food.
“Jones not kidding,” Java said as they watched her shift things in one of the packs so another Ziploc of trail mix could be fit inside.
“Hi MOM,” Martin then said, coming forward with a grin and snatching up one of the packs, hefting it over his shoulder. “What sort’ve mission have we got today? Saharan zombies? Jungle werewolves?” MOM just raised a brow, zipping the pack she’d been fiddling with shut and circling her desk to take a seat.
“Not quite, Martin.” She picked a folder up off the desk and handed it to Diana as she and Java joined them. “You’ll be investigating a series of missing persons cases at Star Ridge State Park in the eastern United States.” The boys peered over Diana’s shoulders as she flipped through the folder, grabbing packs for herself and Java with her tail. Inside were numerous police reports describing the disappearances of nine people, including photos of the missing. A pair of girls no older than her and Martin. A man in his mid-twenties. Middle-aged, elderly, children, there didn’t seem to be any pattern to the missing.
Only one particularly stood out, and the team all glanced at each other when they got to them. The photo showed an adult, they supposed, with short antlers, a muzzle, and tufted tail. Their skin was thick and tawny brown, covered in scutes, and they had teeth like something out of the Ice Age. One eye, the left, was marred with scarring and left a milky pink.
“I take it this is why Billy was talking about Osmosians?” Diana asked, and MOM nodded.
“The park contains a large pack,” she said, “and a good portion of it is their territory. You’ll have to be careful and respectful when inside, Martin.”
“Hey!”
“Osmosians do not suffer disrespect well, especially not established packs. They and the local tribe have happily agreed to work with us, so don’t make either one regret it.” Her tone turned sharp on the last portion, eyes narrowing slightly.
“Of course,” Diana said, and Java nodded beside her. MOM just hummed back at them.
“The pack has called in a team themselves,” she continued, “you’ll be meeting them at the Greenwich Entrance.”
“Wait,” Martin said as she opened the door out, “why would they call in someone else if we’re already coming?”
“It’s an Ossy thing.”
“Is even in pamphlet,” Java said, holding his own copy up, and he was right.
#9. It’s an Ossy thing, roll with it.
~~
The trip in was uneventful, and mostly consisted of Martin trying to work out what sort’ve paranormal mess they were walking into and Diana- who at this point wasn’t even going to argue about the paranormal with him, he was right over half the time and she just ended up listening to him gloat about it- trying to make him drive like a person who knew how. Meanwhile Java appeared to have tuned them both out about an hour ago, pulling out a novel and burying himself in that for most of the drive.
Entering the park revealed a lovely sight. Everything was in full bloom- green vines with trumpet-shaped pink-orange flowers creeping high on the red brick archway that marked the entrance, native flowers a mass of color beneath the entrance sign. Trees all various shades of rich greens. Bees buzzed, butterflies fluttered, and in pride of place sat a large fountain topped with a sculpture of a doe and fawns.
Two people who were probably human stood at the base of the fountain, a distinction made because most of the people they were watching off to the side very much weren’t. One was, an elderly man with dark skin, but out of the other three one was clearly an Osmosian, like the victim they had the photo of, while another’s blue fur blatantly marked him as alien, and the last had teeth they could see flash when they talked even as they came to a stop several yards away. At their feet was a large blue, dog? thing? maybe? There wasn’t that much time to dwell on it, because one of the humans was a girl their age and so as soon as the keys were out of the ignition Martin practically teleported to her side. The redhead looked both surprised and unimpressed by his sudden appearance.
“Hey there, I don’t think we’ve been introduced. My name’s Martin-” True to form he didn’t seem to notice how the girl and the brunet beside her were side eyeing him. He also didn’t notice his sister storming over until she had him by the ear and was yanking him away from them.
“I’m sorry about him, he’s a moron,” she said, holding out her free hand to shake. “I take it you’re the other team that got called in?”
“More like Kevin got called in and we came along for the ride, but yeah,” the girl replied with a firm handshake. “Gwen Tennyson, this is my cousin Ben- also a moron-”
“Hey!”
“-and over there are Rook, Kevin, and the dog is Zed.” Diana nodded, gesturing to her own team.
“I’m Diana Lombard, this is my brother, Martin Mystery, and that’s Java.” Java waved with a smile and Ben waved back.
“Wait, ‘Martin Mystery’?” Kevin and Rook were returning to the group, a map clenched in Rook’s hands and Zed at their heels. There was a toothy and slightly sinister grin on Kevin’s face. “The Martin Mystery and company?” Java and Diana shared a wary look as Martin puffed up like a rooster and held out a hand, gaze lingering briefly on the tight shirt and monstrous teeth.
“The one and only.” Kevin’s toothy grin only got more worrying, even as he accepted the handshake.
“I’m Eva Jones’s son.” And Martin deflated like a popped balloon, which was always amusing for the others. There was no way the Chief of Security’s son was going to be in awe. Something that was all but confirmed when he continued talking. “Mom has told me so many stories about you.”
“What kind of stories?”  Martin asked, eyes narrowing slightly, and Kevin shrugged.
“Varies. Sometimes I stop by for dinner and get to hear about ‘Agent Lombard beat a slug-fucker with brains and a saltwater fish tank’, others I get a text in the middle of the night thanking me for having enough sense to not let a werewolf wound go untreated.” And there it was, Martin was on the edge of pouting. Fortunately- or unfortunately, if you were Diana and loved watching your brother wallow in his own dangerous stupid- Gwen was merciful.
“So, what have we got to go on?” Rook seemed as happy to get to work as Martin and smiled at all of them, immediately going and laying the map he held out on the fountain wall.
“Aaron and John were good enough to provide us a map showing the general area of each disappearance,” he said, pointing out a series of red spots on the map. They were all clustered over a large area with no discernible pattern. “If we make our way onto the Aspen Trail, then cut onto the Blackcap Trail, we should be able to do a partial circuit of the area.” Stepping back, Martin stretched and grinned.
“Sounds like a plan.”
~~
They’d been walking an hour and Diana was in hell.
“I wouldn’t call Attack of the Killer Donuts the best B-horror of our time, I mean have you seen Ice Spiders?”
“Really, Benji? If you’re going with Syfy-style you could at least go for Attack of the Killer Lampreys or something.”
“Ooo, that one was awesome! I’ve watched it four times!”
“Java big fan of Lake Placid sequels.”
“Hold up- Two? Or three and four?”
“Three and four.”
“Good man.”
It was a nightmare.
“I was really hoping Martin would leave this discussion behind.” Gwen patted Diana on the shoulder, joining her in sighing.
“Men, can’t live with them and if you kill them you have to deal with their mothers.” Diana almost joked about having a shot then, then remembered that much like she was, despite all attempts, clearly their father’s favorite, Martin and their mother had bonded like no other, and it was entirely likely that if she killed him Mom would disown her and start again with new children.
She sighed once more.
“So,” she said, pulling her eyes off the boys walking ahead of them to look at Gwen, “the pack brought you guys in?” Gwen nodded.
“Kevin’s Top Ossy on the planet right now, and the missing Ossy is his brother-in-law’s cousin, so when the pack couldn’t figure out what was happening he’s where they turned. The rest of us didn’t want him running into who knows what kind of trouble without back-up.” She could understand that. Apparently, nobody knew what they were dealing with, other than that it probably wasn’t a natural phenomenon (score- one Martin, yay). There weren’t any sinkholes found or anything, and Diana couldn’t imagine large predators had much space to come in with a whole pack of them already living there. But then, why was it…
“Does it seem eerily quiet to you?” Diana asked after a moment. There was still the boys’ conversation, but under it was, nothing.
“Oh thank god, it’s not just me. Shouldn’t there be birds or bugs or something?”
“Yeah…”
Up ahead, Zed sudden froze and began to growl.
Nothing appeared off about the area they were heading into, but still the group stopped where they were and carefully took stock of what was ahead. It was a small valley, not particularly deep but still notable. The path went in, followed the edge of the river, heavily laden with plant-life, then went back up the cliffside a few acres along. At first look, purely innocuous, but as they closed in on each other protectively experience told them they weren’t so lucky.
“Prime ambush territory,” Ben said, and the others all nodded.
“I say we risk it,” Martin added, and Diana sighed.
“Of course you do.”
“What are we going to learn if we don’t go in? Nothing, so we go.”
“It makes sense.”
“If we die, the Center’s paying for the funerals.”
“Deal.”
Which was about the point where a massive head came out of the undergrowth, straight at them, at speed.
“Shit!” Nearly as one mind they scattered, Gwen instinctively hurling a mass of pink energy at the creature as they dodged its fangs. The damn things were easily the length of Diana’s arm! The girls, Kevin, and Rook scrambled away from the creature as more of it emerged, Kevin’s hand tight on Zed’s collar.
It was a massive serpent, with a head easily as wide as Java. The scales along it’s body were a deep, deep black with dark blue banding and shone with a rainbow of iridescence, its head crested with a rack of long, tined antlers. High on the head, between its eyes- one a deep brown and the other a milky beige- sat a diamond crystal that blazed in the mid-afternoon sun. It was beautiful, so beautiful. Surely this would be the best way to die, here to something lovely, rather than later to some slime creature, or ghost, or whatever horrible thing she would be made to face next. A miracle, the fact she’d survived this long, how much longer could luck last before something else ate her, possessed her, best for them not to have the chance-
A flash of pain as she hit concrete and Diana was knocked from her daze, looking up to see Rook laid overtop of her on the trail as the serpent surged forward above them. It turned on itself, clearly drawing back for another attempt and giving Kevin and Gwen just enough of an opening to rush back in and haul them to their feet. The two bolted back up the path, Zed just ahead of them and Kevin behind, as Gwen blasted the beast again, sending it reeling long enough for Martin and Java to come running back out from where they’d tumbled into the valley, Ben over the caveman’s shoulder.
“There’s two of them,” Martin yelled as they ran passed, grabbing Gwen by the arm and shoving her ahead of them. “Two!”
True to word another of the beasts slithered behind them, whole and hearty and quickly joining with the first in chasing them down. All they could do was keep running, running despite the realization these things were fast, and large enough that they all knew any distance they might gain would be lost if they tried to head into the trees. These things could probably eat the trees. Relief only came when Ben finally came back to himself, vanishing in a flash of green light that had Java dropping him in the path, only to appear again as a plantperson.
“Time to bring the heat,” he said, shooting seeds from his hands into the earth along the path. Almost instantly they sprouted, bursting forth as thick vines that joined together to form a wall blocking the way. He then lit the vines on fire, just in case. “Hah! Let’s see ya get through that!”
“Don’t tempt the dragons!” Swampfire squeaked as Kevin got him by the back of the neck, having doubled back once he realized what was happening, and dragged him along with the others.
They may or may not have been being chased anymore, but they sure as fuck weren’t stopping.
~~
“I can’t believe we almost got eaten by an Uktena!”
“Two Uktena.”
“Even better!”
For the most part they were all collapsed at one of the outlook spots on the trail. Martin, though, was pacing back and forth with a grin because who else did Diana know who would think nearly dying via giant snake monster was cool?
“Okay, Martin,” Gwen said, “glad you’re happy, but if you could fill the rest of us in.” He stopped and turned his grin on the group.
“Uktena are horned serpents from Cherokee myth, formed out of people unhappy with their lives,” he said. “The crystal on the head? It’s called an Ulun'suti- I probably butchered that… Anyway, it’s mildly hypnotic and eventually creatures who stare into it just give themselves up to be eaten!” A look of mild confusion came over his face. “They don’t normally hunt humans though, that’s weird…” Off the side, where he was lying in the grass, Kevin shook his head.
“A dragon made out of people, with a blind left eye, that’s just suddenly showed up?” He lifted his head enough to look at the others. “That was Dalen.” His head thudded back down. “Also explains why she’s hunting humans, we aren’t picky eaters.”
“Alright,” Diana said, “that explains the one then. What about the other?” Everybody shrugged.
“Who knows,” Martin said, “could be another one of the missing people, could be one that just showed up around now. Maybe having the other one here attracted it.”
“Knowing our luck it heard we were coming and decided to join in.” Ben heaved a sigh. “Why is it always things with scales? We have not met anyone decent with scales!”
Diana was happy to see everyone except Ben sit up and give him the stink eye. Kevin doubly so.
“Excepting present company.” She continued to glare, tail twitching in aggravation. Was it cool to smack one of somebody else’s boys?
“Uh-huh, yeah..”
“And all of my siblings? Just not a thing now?” Kevin asked with a sneer, before falling back to the ground. Zed whined and curled up against his side. “Just, will somebody kill him and save me the trouble?”
“No killing my cousin,” Gwen said, flopping back down herself.
“And you all see why we broke up.” While Kevin huffed, Ben turned a pleading gaze on Martin, in clear hopes of back-up. Instead Martin gave him a sharp look and went to collapse beside his sister and Gwen.
“Not cool, man.”
~~
They decided, in the end, to turn in for the night and pick the mission back up in the morning. The reasoning being that it was getting late and since so far all known attacks and attempted attacks had happened during the day odds were good the Uktena were at least primarily diurnal. An unoccupied cabin was found along the trail, outside of what Martin and Kevin had deemed the ‘Dinner Zone’ as well as the pack territories. That second bit was important because once everyone was inside Kevin had gone out and rubbed his scent all over the trees surrounding the building, just in case that helped.
It was an Ossy thing. They rolled with it.
~~
Dinner options were slim. The Center had provided trail food- mixes, jerky, dried fruit- and a few tins of canned meat and fish for each agent. The Tennyson team turned out to be at least a little more prepared, mostly because Kevin had managed to fit a corned beef into his pack (“We just don’t ask anymore, last time it ended with a two-hour explanation of space-time and dimensional rigging that went over everybody’s head”) and Rook had brought a collapsible pot and portable range (“You would think the park would stock these, but apparently no”). Most of the corned beef went to Kevin and Zed, something the Tennysons and Rook didn’t begrudge them and Martin, Diana, and Java- keeping in mind the pamphlets- decided to follow their lead on. They weren’t certain what happened if an Osmosian got hungry, but they didn’t want to find out.
Eventually, the group split into two, with Java, Rook, and Kevin taking over the kitchen while the others hung out the whole ten feet away in the living room. If nothing else the cooks seemed to be enjoying themselves, laughing and chatting and exchanging tips and tricks and recipes. And at some point Kevin’d put his hair up, the end result of which was Martin watching them over the back of one of the couches, eyes narrowed, mouth open, and head tilted to one side as Ben patted him consolingly on the shoulder.
“I swear,” Diana said quietly as she watched this, leaning in close to Gwen, “I can feel his heterosexuality combusting from here.” Gwen nodded.
“Yeah, that happens sometimes.”
~~
“You know, I never thought I’d enjoy canned sardines.”
“It is amazing what you can make work by cannibalizing the right packs.”
“And working with a guy who’s used to making a single ingredient into a million distinct recipes.”
“You are welcome.”
~~
“Ooo, spellbook!” It was a testament to the sort’ve thing she was used to that Gwen didn’t jump when Martin unceremoniously dumped himself into the seat beside her. She’d figured getting some studying done couldn’t hurt, not when they were trying to deal with a pair of giant, magical snakes, but as soon as she’d pulled out the book and cracked it open there he’d been.
“Into magic?” she asked, looking at him critically, eyes narrowed. Martin puffed up proudly.
“Runs in the family,” he said, “I can’t even remember when my Gran and aunts started teaching me spellwork.” Gwen snorted a quick laugh.
“Lucky. I had to teach myself. It’s only in the last few years I’ve gotten any actual teaching, or access to new books.” She raised the one in her lap slightly for emphasis and watched Martin light right up.
“Wait here! Java!” Leaping to his feet he crossed the space between himself and the caveman, immediately digging into the front of his shirt and pulling out a large book before practically diving back for the couch. “Check this out.”
The book wasn’t as grand as the one Gwen held, and it was certainly in worse shape. There was water damage, scorch marks, and places where dirt had clearly been ground into the parchment. As Martin flipped through it Gwen was fairly certain she saw evidence that it had been rebound at least once. But it was stuffed to the brim with spells and notes in what she had to assume was his own handwriting. Half of the spells weren’t even in the same languages, she counted at least six. Three of which she didn’t recognize.
“Okay,” she said after about the third spell in what she would later learn was Etruscan, leaning over to dig through her pack for some pens and paper, “you can copy from mine if I can copy from yours. Deal?”
“Deal.”
~~
“Okay,” Rook said the next morning while they all gathered over a breakfast of cereal bars, jerky, and dried apples, plus plenty of instant coffee for Martin and Gwen (“It’s your own fault for staying up till four am”), “let us review- what do we know?”
“That we’re dealing with two Uktena,” Diana said, “one of whom used to be an Osmosian.”
“Because of course Ossys aren’t scary enough,” Ben added and got swatted for it because she and Kevin were both too tired for him to start.
“Hunting here,” Java said, pointing at the map laid on the table between them, “in valleys.”
“They’re ambush predators,” Martin said around a bite of cheerio bar. “Plus, their breath is poisonous.”
“Oh joy.” Sarcasm was just dripping from Kevin’s voice. “Hypnotic and poisonous.” He sighed, snatching up a handful of jerky and chewing it with open aggravation. “Roy can never hear about that, for his own sake.” Gwen patted his shoulder and passed an apple ring to Zed before leaning forward to inspect the map.
“So, what do we do then? Are we catching them or-?”
“The Center can move them somewhere they won’t be a threat to any people,” Diana said. “They’ve done it before with larger creatures. We just have to subdue them first so they can come in and get them.”
“It’s safer than trying to kill them anyway,” Martin added. “They’ve only got one vulnerable spot, on the seventh stripe, and it’s tough to hit without being in eating range.”
“Okay,” Ben said, “so all we have to do is catch them.”
“Easier said than done,” Diana replied, leaning back against the couch. “How do we catch them?”
“If you guys can get them to stay still,” Gwen said, “Martin and I both have sleep spells we can cast on them. I don’t know for sure if they’d work on these things, but it’s worth a shot.”
“I don’t know, Gwen,” Martin said, rubbing the back of his head. “Supposedly seeing these things asleep causes your family to die.”
“At this point,” Kevin tossed in, “I would be impressed if something managed to kill the family I’ve still got.” The table went quiet, everyone rolling the risk around in their heads, blindly watching Zed sneak food.
“Alright,” Rook eventually said, “how about this- Ben, do you think you could use Diamondhead or Swampfire to subdue them?” Ben hummed, leaning back in his seat as he considered the idea.
“Diamondhead, Swampfire, Wildvine, all could lock them in place from a distance. Maybe Gravattack? And if need be I could always possess them one at a time with Ghostfreak…”
“How about we avoid possession?” Diana asked, shivering. She’d seen and experienced enough possessions in her life, thank you, she didn’t want to play witness to any more than she had to. Java laid a supportive hand on her shoulder. The Tennyson team gave her a questioning look, but Kevin soon nodded, and the rest followed suit.
“Yeah, that’s a trauma I think we can all forgo reliving if we have the chance.”
“So,” Rook continued, “we draw them out into the open and Ben subdues them. If that does not work, then Martin and Gwen put them to sleep. Agreed?” Everyone looked at each other, then slowly began to shrug.
“It’s the best plan we’ve got so far,” Ben said. “So, Martin, you’re our expert, where should we look for these things?”
“Well…” Martin leaned forward, looking over the map. “They’re ambush predators, so they should probably hang out in places where they can jump out at people… Caves, valleys, deep water, dense foliage, large rocks…” Again, the table went silent as everyone considered the information.
“So,” Kevin finally said, “the entire Dinner Zone, basically?”
“I wish you guys wouldn’t call it that…”
“Pretty much,” Martin answered. He hummed contemplatively, tapping his fingers on the table as he considered the map and their options. “They are snakes though, maybe we can catch them sunning. Then they’d already be out in the open.”
“Good idea,” Java said, and the others nodded.
“We’d still have to find out where they sun,” Rook noted, but Kevin was already on his feet.
“Leave that to me,” he said, pulling out his phone and stepping off to the side, “the local pack should know every decent sunning spot in the park.”
“Okay then. Everyone,” Ben said with a grin, also rising to his feet, “get your shit together, we’ve got some snakes to catch.”
The cabin became a buzz of activity, as everyone scrambled to get their things back in order and clean up after themselves. Trash was shoveled into bins, counters were given a final wipe down, books and writing supplies were carefully tucked away into packs. Dinner and breakfast had cleared enough room for extra things to be stowed inside them, such as Martin’s spellbook and some of the canteens, which the group took the time to refill at the sink. It was the height of summer, even in a temperate region you didn’t want to run out of water if you didn’t have to. At some point Kevin returned to the couch, snatching a pencil from Martin so he could mark various areas on the map, chattering away with who they had to assume was Aaron in languages nobody understood. Occasionally the Omnitrix would pick up something in Imperial Osmosian, but other than that…
“We have sunning spots!” he finally called out, as everyone was finishing up packing, snatching up the map triumphantly and rocketing to his feet. “The hunt is on!”
~~
The journey wasn’t exactly arduous, but it sure wasn’t easy. For one thing they had to move at a steady clip, as fast as they possibly could. Nobody knew how long it took for reptiles that size to get up to temperature, but they didn’t want to miss them and have to search the entire area. Even still, that wouldn’t have been so much to ask if there hadn’t been five different sunning spots recommended in and around the Dinner Zone, each of which was only accessible by narrow paths through the trees, half of which were overgrown with foliage. These were places the pack occasionally used, but which were far enough out of the way so as to not see regular visitors. Perfect places for monster serpents to catch the morning sun.
“I have a question,” Ben asked as they made their way down from a tall outcropping. It had been the third stop, to no avail, and while all of them were athletic and well hydrated they also were soaked with sweat. “How does someone even become a snake monster?” All eyes turned to Martin who was, as usual, glad to share his obscure knowledge.
“Well, according to Cherokee myth a guy turned himself into one while spending the night alone in an asi with a pair of deer antlers, but I’ve never seen anything detailing exactly how that worked. She probably didn’t need the antlers though, having her own.”
“Honestly I’d be pissed to have lost a pair,” Kevin said, grasping onto trees to slow his descent down a particularly steep area. “A lot of packs are really tied closely to neighboring communities, especially ones native to the particular region. Tribal land’s close enough, if there’s a trick to the transformation Dalen probably learned it from a Cherokee parent or cousin.”
“Or grandparent.”
“Same diff.” The group went quiet again, mostly to focus on not slipping and falling, something only Diana was immune to. Turned out the tail was useful for balance and for catching herself on branches and the blackcap bushes that had clearly given the trail its name, the scales even protecting her from the thorns. She kept throwing Ben smug looks over it, and Rook, Kevin, and Martin kept giving her thumbs up when the hero wasn’t looking. None of them had forgotten or forgiven his ‘no decent people with scales’ comment yet.
It wasn’t until they found the path again that they returned to talking.
“So, she probably did it to herself,” Gwen said. “That’s sad, and worrying.”
“In her defense,” Rook replied, “I am sure she did not expect to start eating passersby. Right?” Eyes went to Kevin, who shrugged.
“Don’t look at me, I met Dalen once and we didn’t exactly get close. If she was anything like Roy probably not?”
“Still not know about other snake,” Java pointed out. He was right too, they had no clue what was going on with that one. The best case scenario was that it was another of the missing people, bringing the Presumed Dead count down to seven, but they just couldn’t know. For all the information they had it could be a male attracted by Dalen’s presence, or a newcomer that prompted her own transformation. The worst possibility was that somebody had made them against their wills, but since so far Martin had said nothing about that being an option everyone was setting it aside. He and Gwen were the magic users around, after all, and surely they would’ve let the others know if that was something that might have happened.
“Hopefully,” Diana said, “the Center can figure out who they are.” If they could give some sort’ve closure to the families, tell even one mother that their child was alive even if they’d never come home, then that would make the effort of learning, of catching them alive, worth it. Idly she wondered if the pack had already been told of Dalen’s fate.
“Sure they can.” Martin’s grin was bright, though behind it was dead seriousness. He may have been a goofball, but his job was important and he treated it as such when the chips came down. “With all the stuff we’ve got access to? There’s no way they can’t.” Up ahead on the path, Rook nodded.
“Or at least no reason we cannot find somebody who can.”
~~
Four turned out to be their lucky number. Both the Uktena were there, their bulk coating the surface of a massive stone jutting out over one of the area’s many streams. Their scales shone in the sunlight, dark and rainbowed and beautiful, while their Ulun'suti glinted and seemed to almost glow in the light. Under better circumstances it would have been a wonderful sight, two great dragons warming themselves. A sight for life long memories. One for photos.
Thankfully they didn’t seem to hear the click of a phone.
“Kevin!” Half the group hissed as one, careful to keep their voices down. They were gathered in the shrubbery near the bottom of the stone, just far enough away to avoid being immediately noticed.
“What?” he whispered, replacing the phone in his pack, “Her mom will want this.” With a round of sighs the others shook their heads, turning their attention back to the Uktena pair.
“Is this normal?”
“Maybe? Who knows, I’ve only read about these things and one of them is an Ossy.”
“Okay, do we all remember the plan?” Rook looked around at the group as best he could- Java had been forced to hide further back due to his size, and Kevin would’ve been too if he and the girls hadn’t been first to the spot, which meant he had to somehow check around that bulk on top of all the foliage everywhere- and was glad to see nodding and thumbs up all around. “Alright. Spread out, make sure they cannot slip away if they get loose. And be careful.”
They all were as quiet as they could be as they acted, avoiding loose stones and twigs, taking their time now that they could confirm that the snakes weren’t going anywhere anytime soon. Gwen and Ben headed one direction, while Martin, Diana, and Rook headed in the other. Kevin and Java stayed more central, a solid foundation behind the targets. As soon as everyone appeared to be in position, Ben dialed the Omnitrix and slammed down his selection, erupting again in a blaze of bright green light that faded away to reveal Wildvine already digging his roots into the stony shores.
At the sudden flash the Uktena both leapt into action, rearing straight up as their heads swung to see the source. A hiss left the one that was Dalen, body tensing as her companion tilted their head. The action caused the gem between their eyes to glint and gleam, and the group all were careful to avoid looking at it, keeping their eyes on the antlers, the jaws, anywhere else on them. Except for Wildvine, who simply laughed at the attempt as the reflection off the crystal played across his face.
“Got you there,” he said with a wide grin, “Wildvine can’t be hypnotized!”
The pair seemed to be surprised by the new development, though with snake faces who could tell. Still, they didn’t surge forward in vicious strikes like before, but instead stayed in place, eyeing the young hero with caution. Wildvine took the opening. He reached over his shoulders, tearing seed pods from his back and hurling them towards the snakes. As soon as the first few hit the serpents took action, moving to put distance between themselves and this strange foe they couldn’t bring to heel, but it was too late. The moment they began to move the seedpods sprouted, issuing forth thick, knobby green vines that wove themselves around Uktena and rock both.
“See? Easy!” The rest of the group crept out of hiding carefully, eyes locked on the captured serpents.
“I’d feel a lot better if that hold was tighter…” The grip didn’t look secure. Dalen was held mostly to the stone as she struggled, but the other one, not so much. It strained upward, and though it didn’t get far one could imagine the sound of vines creaking and straining against its strength.
When they finally failed it was one after the other down the creature’s back, like watching a zipper come undone.
“Shit!” Everyone scrambled back again as the vines on the Uktena fell away and it surprised them all by turning not towards its attackers but towards Dalen. In two massive bites it tore through the vines holding her head and neck, leaving her free to repeat its earlier vine bursting maneuver. That job done, it finally tuned back to Wildvine, lunging forward in an attack he was just barely able to dodge, and twisting back on itself to trap the Tennysons in the coil of its body. Dalen, meanwhile, surged in the opposite direction, throwing herself among the rest of the team with a loud hiss and a brandishing of fangs and antlers. Everyone who could scattered, trying to avoid being victim to either the weapons or bulk of the beast.
She lashed out with tail and fang, swung her antlers in wide arcs when too close to lunge, thrashing like she wanted to get at all of them at once. Probably she did. It was impossible to get a bead on her, not when she was moving about so wildly, not when she was staying in such close proximity to them, not when they were trying so hard not to be caught in the shine of the Ulun'suti in the sun. Java caught Martin as a swinging tail launched him into the air. Rook’s call to fall back was almost lost in the sound of heavy scales on stone and the splashing of all these creatures in the water.
“A little help here?!”
“We’ve kinda got our own problems!” Zed at least was able to come to the Tennyson’s aid, charging forward to drive her teeth into the tail of the other Uktena while the others were too caught up in not being eaten by Dalen, and keeping a tight grip even as it tried to fling her off and into the woods. If nothing else, it gave the cousins an opening- for Gwen to distract it with blasts to the face and belly and for Ben to dial up an option that would hopefully have an easier time subduing the creature. In another flash the roots and greenery of Wildvine disappeared and were replaced with the shining form of Diamondhead.
“If somebody could get them on the ground, this time it should work!”
“It better!” Martin dodged another swing of Dalen’s antlers as he and Rook bolted for the other serpent’s tail, leaping up to try to drag it down with sheer weight. Diana and Kevin ran to try to do the same with the head, the hybrid reaching out to get a thick coating of the stone as they cut under it on their way to where Gwen was using her magic to drag the thing into their range. Java, meanwhile, was taking on the dangerous job of trying to keep Dalen from going after the rest of them.
It wasn’t working.
As soon as she realized her companion was being dogpiled she surged back over the top of the stone, mouth gaping wide to snap up somebody, anybody, in front of her. Java clung to her middle, digging in his heels as best he could, Gwen throwing up a quick shield to prevent her from managing the foot of distance more she needed to reach the rest of the team. Quickly she was in on the battle between caveman and serpent, Java doing his best to slowly drag Dalen backwards away from the group while Gwen used her magic to keep her from doubling back and tearing into Java like a ripe fruit. It was a vicious game of tug-of-war, where a slip by either of the heroes could easily get all of them killed.
On the other side of things, Operation Dogpile was working. Kevin and Diana had distracted the snake long enough for Martin, Rook, and Zed to get his tail to the ground, and together their own weight was enough to keep its head on the ground as well. Diamondhead, through this, solidified each little victory with a barrage of crystal, a preliminary cage as the massive shards briefly cut off movement away from him. This wasn’t a solid solution though. The crystals were stronger than vines, yes, but here and now was not the place to take half-measures. Once the snake was under some degree of control he began phase two, calling up huge, thick sheets of crystal from the ground. Five locking the head in place, with one before the snout, while hordes of others ran down the serpent’s length, with gaps between them only large enough for those clinging to it to slip free.
At which point Dalen went ‘fuck this’. Where before she had been struggling to pull herself free of Gwen’s magic long enough to tear Java off her midsection, now she instead suddenly surged forward towards the girl, shocking her into breaking her hold and Java into loosening his grip. She almost soared over Diamondhead’s head, curling herself around her companion’s and trying to bite through the crystal holding them. Inside the crystal cage, Kevin and Diana were beginning to lose the breath they’d been holding in an attempt to not be poisoned and Diana, much like Dalen, immediately decided to take action.
That action was punching the Uktena in her dead eye.
With a violent hiss the beast pulled back, giving her head a brief shake and what could only be a glare to those assembled before disappearing into the forest as suddenly as she had first appeared the day before.
They were alone again. Sort’ve.
“Everyone in one piece?” Ben asked in unison with Java’s “Martin and Diana alright?”
“Fine over here,” Martin said as he, Rook, and the dog all slid free of the cage. “Sis?”
“We’re okay,” Diana responded.
“Nice jab.” Kevin gave her a grin as she helped him squeeze free of the crystal and she gladly returned it.
“Thanks, my mom taught me.”
“Awesome.”
“So,” Gwen said, heaving a sigh as everyone gathered on and around the rock to check their injuries- only scrapes and bruises, thank god, though Kevin and Diana worried everyone with some coughing they insisted was nothing major- and look out over their catch, “what do we do now?”
“We call the Center,” Diana said, she, Martin, and Java lumping together protectively as the Tennyson team did the same, “then we go find the other one.” As one the group looked at the Uktena they’d already caught. It wasn’t struggling anymore, having seemingly accepted that there was no escape from it’s current predicament, and instead was staring them down with it’s dark, dark eyes. Ben took a deep breath as, in a flash of green, he turned back into himself, and fixed the team with a self-assured smile.
“We’ve totally got this.”
~~
The team split up. Not for long, just so somebody was there to wait for the Center’s monster transport squad to show up while the others made sure they had a trail they could follow. In theory it wasn’t difficult, she was a sixty-foot snake for fuck’s sake, but she was a sixty-foot snake that had been an Osmosian, which was the universe’s way of challenging a hunter.
“How did she make the trees here hold her?”
“I don’t know. I saw Kay do that sort’ve thing once, but he’s never taught me.” Humming under his breath, Java stepped away from Kevin and Rook and began scaling one of the trees that appeared to have greatly suffered under the weight of what they were assuming was Dalen. At least, the damage appeared fresh enough for that. He was careful with his steps, even as the other boys gathered at the base of the trunk to break his fall should he do so, and stayed mindful of the damage already done. When he reached as far as he felt he safely could, the caveman cast his gaze at the trees around them.
“Trail go,” he said slowly, pointing, “that way.”
“Alright.” Rook nodded, gesturing Kevin forward. They had Zed with them, and hopefully soon they would find a spot where Dalen had returned to the ground and the Baskurr could pick her scent back up. “Are you staying in the trees, or rejoining us down here?” Java took a moment to think about it, looking over the path through the trees. It seemed solid enough. Hopefully.
“Java stay in trees, keep others on track.” Another nod from the alien and a smile.
“Lead the way then.”
~~
Everyone was back on the ground when the others found them again, having tracked them with Gwen’s magic, as planned, and made a beeline rather than following the Uktena’s path. Zed was back on the scent and tense at Kevin’s side as they all reconnected.
“The other one taken care of?” he asked, trying to keep the dog calm with long strokes down her neck. Gwen nodded.
“They’re going to find a space for them in the jungle,” she said, “and for Dalen once we get her.”
“Good.”
“Okay everybody,” Martin said, smiling and stretching, “get ready for Round Two.”
“Electric Boogaloo.”
“Rook, please don’t.”
~~
The moment Zed started growling was déjà vu all over again. It wasn’t the same little valley, not the same river, and there was no concrete path leading ominously down into the shade, but it certainly felt the same. There were no trees down there, only dense underbrush. Thick masses of green bushes, grasses, vines, waist high and more, coated the bank on both sides. The river itself was deep, dark, and fast moving. No birds or insects sang.
In the center of the water, one could just make out the tips of antlers sticking out into the open air.
“So, Diamondhead again?” Ben asked, careful to keep his voice down. They were all fairly certain they were out of striking range, but that didn’t mean they wanted for her to notice them before she absolutely had to. Gwen shook her head.
“I’m not sure that would work,” she said. “I mean, they’ve already proved they’re smarter than your average snakes.”
“Or at least more social,” Martin added.
“It might be easier this time,” Rook said, “with only one for us to dogpile on.”
“And then we can worry about getting poisoned and maybe drowning,” Diana pointed out. “The last plan worked, but if we can avoid anyone having to lie over this thing’s nose I think we should go for it.”
“I’m with Diana,” Kevin chimed in, “holding the head down by hand is too risky.” Martin was the first to nod, followed by the rest.
“You’ve got a point,” he said, then held up the U-Watch. “U-Watch has a grappling hook, I might be able to hold her in place so Gwen can put her to sleep.”
“My proto-tool also has one,” Rook added, “we can each go for an antler.”
“Okay,” Ben said, “but can you two hold her on your own?”
“Java help,” the caveman said, and Kevin piped up along with him.
“With the four of us, it’d be, well not easy but not impossible. Then you and Diana can hold the back end while Gwen works her magic.” Nobody looked entirely comfortable with the idea, but then that wasn’t something that had ever stopped any of them from doing their jobs before. Ben gave a short, empty laugh.
“Probably be easier to just kill her.” Kevin huffed.
“As long you’re the one to tell her mother.” The team went quiet for a beat, two beats.
“Let’s go with the grappling hook plan.”
“Good idea.”
~~
Zed was sent down into the valley first, as bait, despite Kevin’s vehement protests. The thinking here was that 1) she was small and fast and more likely to outspeed Dalen than any of the rest of them were, and 2) out of them she had the most experience with this sort’ve thing thanks to her old owner. They hoped she would lure the serpent out of the river and into the open, so they could have an easier time getting hold of her without running such a high risk of getting pulled under and drowned.
The plan worked. Dalen surged out of the river as soon as Zed was in range, just barely missing the Baskurr on the first strike (and the clenching of Kevin’s jaw was nearly audible at that). In an instant Zed was twisting on her heels and charging back up the snake-made trail towards Gwen with what felt in the moment an endless mass of magical serpent close behind. As soon as the alien dog had reached Gwen’s side Phase Two of Operation: Rescue Dalen From Herself went into action. In a flash of light Ben was replaced with Four Arms and he leapt down from where he and Diana had lain in wait at the top of the near cliff acting as the valley wall, landing heavily by the tail of the beast and grabbing hold. Dalen, of course, couldn’t be having with that and began to turn on herself to strike at him, only for the rest of the boys to jump into action.
From their positions hidden in the brush on either side of the trail Martin and Rook sprang forward, each taking quick aim and launching their grappling hooks at the nearest antlers to themselves. The response was vicious, with Dalen immediately trying to rear back and take them off their feet, only to be stopped by Kevin and Java’s intervention, grabbing hold of the other boys and the lines tethering her and digging in their considerably heftier and stronger heels. Between the pairs- Martin and Kevin on her right, Rook and Java on her left- she soon found herself struggling to move her head more than a half-foot in any direction, each attempt causing the opposing pair to yank back as hard as they could to keep her in place.
That was Diana’s cue. It had been decided, just before the plan went into action, that using Four Arms meant Ben wouldn’t need the help keeping Dalen’s back end under control, which freed her to help in other ways. Such as making sure nobody was sunken into despair by the gem on the Uktena’s head. Leaping down from the top of the cliff, she landed squarely on the serpent’s back, using the extra balance her tail gave her to scramble up to her head. Once there, she wrapped legs and tail around Dalen’s throat as well as she could before hefting Gwen’s now empty pack across her face, quickly stretching to catch the second strap and hold it tight so the Ulun'suti was suitably covered. Now, truly, the creature was as subdued as the non-magic-users could safely get her, and it was up to the only magic-user let unoccupied to finish the job.
Backing up to get a better view, Gwen opened her spellbook to the appropriate page. Thankfully it was a simple one, requiring her to trace what to a novice would’ve seemed an intricate pattern in front of her, one that rested in the air in a series of glowing pink lines, and pushing it gently towards the serpent alongside a single word incantation.
“Quiescis.”
It was like the entire valley went still, silent seconds stretching into something that felt like hours. The others kept their tight holds as the Uktena just, sat there, unmoving. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, she slowly began to lower her head to the ground. They let her, each carefully releasing the breathes they’d held in anticipation as they loosened their grips and she curled in around herself, settling into a quietly coiled form in the brush. Nobody said a word for several moments. Diana slid from her back. Everyone watched the creature as if she may leap back up at any moment.
She didn’t.
“Yes!” With a series of whoops the whole team burst into massive grins. Java lifted Rook straight off his feet in a hug. Gwen burst into laughter, doubly so as Zed jumped up to lick at her face. A flash of light turned Ben back to himself in time to share a high five with Diana. Kevin threw an arm around Martin’s shoulder in a tight side-hug, a gesture Martin returned for about five seconds before realizing ‘proximity’ and ‘Kevin’ and trying to carefully edge away (it didn’t work) (“Have your crises on your own time, Mystery”). The relief that flooded the small valley was palpable as they crowed their victory, relishing in their safety, the Uktenas’ safety, and the public’s safety.
Everything was going to be fine.
~~
“Good job, everyone,” MOM said as behind her Center employees carefully moved Dalen into a transport container, “thanks to you both Uktena will be moved to a reserve in South America where they won’t be any further threat to the public.”
“I’m sure Dalen’s family will be happy to know she’ll be safe, at least,” Diana said. Ben then chimed in.
“And, the other one, you’re going to find out who they are, right?”
“We’re going to try,” MOM said. “We can’t promise we’ll succeed, but we’re going to try.” The Tennysons didn’t look convinced, but before they could say anything Kevin tossed in a quick
“It’s better than the Plumbers have ever managed.” -and there really wasn’t a way for them to counter that.
“You should all be very proud of yourselves.” And with that MOM simply turned away, a final compliment before she gave her attention back to the people doing the transporting, leaving the team to their own selves once again.
“About that,” Martin said, grinning and holding out a hand for a professional shake, “great spellwork, Gwen. A resting spell rather than a sleeping spell, nice last-minute switch.” She laughed and accepted the shake.
“Thanks,” she said. “Kevin’s family may be tough enough for him not to worry about, but I really didn’t want to risk mine. And since you were so happy to see it in the book last night it was pretty close to the front of my mind.” Somehow Martin’s grin got wider.
“Awesome!”
“You guys all were great,” Ben said, stepping forward with Rook right behind him in action and word.
“We would love working with you again.”
“Hopefully with something involving less hypnotic snakes,” Gwen made sure to add. With a grin of her own Diana laughed.
“Tell me about it,” she said, “if I never see another one in my life it’ll be too soon.”
“And what about Osmosians who aren’t snakes?” Kevin asked, “‘cause I still gotta go fill in Dalen’s family, if you all wanna join me?”
They kind of did.
~~
Turned out to find the pack you had to go down a well-hidden back road into an area of the park you could hardly even see from the main roads. Eventually you came to a dirt parking lot, half full of pick-ups and SUVs, and from there followed a trail down into one of the park’s biggest valleys. There were plenty of impressed whistles as Kevin pointed out things like the likely primary sunning spots for the pack, or explained how this massive cliff was likely run through with miles of tunnels and dens given the size of it and the age of the pack who lived there. At the base of the cliff, at the end of the trail, they found a large clearing with buildings built against the stone and so, many, people.
It wasn’t the whole pack by any stretch of the imagination, but it was still more than most of the group had been expecting. They’d figured Aaron and John- who were there, so at least they had those familiar faces- maybe the poor woman’s parents, mates perhaps, but it seemed that whole family branch was waiting on them. Everyone, from fluff covered children to the elderly, and in a variety of combinations from ‘totally all Ossy’ to ‘what are humans doing here?’ Most of the latter turned out to be relatives from the tribe, joined with their family to catch the news about their missing cousin.
The mood hadn’t been good when they arrived, everyone already knowing the news wasn’t likely to be happy. In fact, it’d improved slightly when they’d explained that Dalen wasn’t dead or kidnapped, just, well, turned into a giant snake and gone to live in the wilds and eat people. This was, apparently, considered at least semi-reasonable by the Osmosian side of things, even if the humans involved were very concerned and needed to be reassured that she and the other Uktena were being moved somewhere they couldn’t cause any problems. At which point they’d then had to reassure everybody that the Center could be trusted to move an Ossy, giant horned serpent or no.
Half an hour they were, just on “no, really, it’s cool, she’s gonna be fine, and we’re keeping an eye on it just in case anyway”. Paranoia apparently didn’t just run through the blood, it galloped.
The group found themselves invited to an early dinner, which quickly proved itself to also be a sort’ve wake. It seemed everybody had a story to tell about Dalen as they clustered at the edge of the clearing, drinking homebrew and eating a meal featuring heavily salted meat. A good meal, to the point Java and Kevin were both clamoring for some of the recipes (Martin and Diana had resigned themselves to a lifetime with regular bean bread from the caveman’s first bite), though it would’ve been better if they hadn’t all been served enough bear to kill a man. Apparently, it was the highest calorie food there and they were ‘all still growing’.
By the end of things more of the pack had come out to join them and the stories stopped being just about Dalen. Everyone had some tale to tell, whether they were traditional stories, tales of strange happenings, or the group telling story after story of their adventures. About wars, about hauntings, about survival in desolate landscapes and mad science gone horribly wrong. And when the stories got too scary for the little ones there were Java and Rook, off to the side telling them Revonnahan fairy tales and reciting Shakespeare comedies.
Half of the kids refused to go to bed until Java promised to come back sometime with his sock puppets and tell the stories properly. Another quarter had to be reminded that no, they could not go to Canada or Revonnah immediately, their families would miss them.
Again, the group stayed the night in the park, this time set up in a guest house that pointedly did not open into any of the tunnels or dens. Nobody even considered being offended, not with the (apparently reasonable?) paranoia, and their hosts made sure they had plenty of good food and water to keep them into morning. Many thanks followed them when they left the next day- for their stories, for coming to help, for not turning immediately to killing one of their own like so many outsiders would’ve done. (“I’m still not sure about that, I mean an Uktena-” “Pack.” “…...why do I even try?”) It was a great service they’d done both pack and tribe and there was no way they could leave without their gratitude having been made blindingly clear.
Still, nearly all of them agreed that the whole smoked turkey each was given was maybe going a bit overboard.
According to Kevin it was another Ossy thing.
So, they rolled with it.
~~
Everything always seemed boring after a mission. Didn’t matter if the team was settling back in at Torrington, or at home over the holidays, that juxtaposition between being off in amazing places experiencing new things and fighting monsters and magic and returning to normal life was always jarring. Like stepping off a boat only for your body to suddenly realize that the ground was stable. But if he had to come back to anywhere, he was always glad when it was home, where he could retreat into his own little haven of weirdness.
His room at the Lombard-Mystery house made the one at Torrington look like Diana’s.
Their parents had long given up on being able to see the floor and now just accepted that it would always be ankle deep in everything from dirty underwear to magical talismans to rogue Yu-Gi-Oh! cards. Though not food, not since the day their mom had actually brought out a flamethrower and brandished it in the direction of his door. Every square inch of wall space was covered in posters from various B-movies and sports events, and one massive mural of Hedorah he’d painted when he was twelve and was still way too proud of. The shelves strained under the weight of comic books, reference books, horror stories by everyone from Lovecraft to Ravenheart, and figurines of Digimon nobody would’ve ever expected to be able to find figurines for. Truly the only mostly-clear surfaces in the room were his bed, which was only half storage, and his desk, which held only a lamp flanked by figures of PlatinumNumemon and Raremon.
That gave him just enough space to continue his various studies into the weird and unusual and, most importantly, the magical, as he was doing at the moment. He’d come home, greeted his parents, regaled them with the story of he, Diana, and Java’s adventure (while Diana stood to the side, butting in every time he was explaining how awesome he was, the spoilsport), and ever since had been buried in his spellbook. There were so many new spells in it thanks to Gwen and he was absolutely enraptured. There was nothing quite the same as learning new magic and it would’ve taken a miracle to drag him away.
Or his phone going off, as the case may be.
Honestly even that didn’t really work. He didn’t even put down the turkey sandwich he’d made himself (they had too much turkey, somebody had to get rid of it), just pulled his phone out of his pocket blind, eyes still locked on the book.
“Hello, Martin Mystery speaking.”
“Hey Martin.” Finally, his attention was got. He didn’t look away from the book, but at least he stopped hunching over it.
“Tonio! Hey, how’s it going man?”
“Boring, for the most part. I might actually be starting to miss your antics.”
“Ouch. Terminal boring then.”
“Yep. If I don’t make it to the end of summer I’ve asked Mom to send you my comic collection.”
“Truly you’re the best friend.”
“I know.” There was a pause and Martin could’ve sworn he could hear the creak as Tonio leaned his chair back. He steeled himself, that always came with added teasing. “So, Diana said you guys went out of town.” Wait, since when did Diana have Tonio’s number? Since when did they talk? Exactly what sort’ve stories were they exchanging behind his back, and he knew if they were talking they were.
“Yeah,” Martin said, not letting on the sudden wariness he was feeling, “was pretty cool. Food was great, Java’s probably gonna be serving it in the cafeteria for half of next year.”
“Nice, nice,” he could almost see his friend nodding along in his mind’s eye, “she also said you met a cute guy.” No. Nope. Nada.
“I did not.” He was going to kill her.
“Really? She said you practically drooled.”
“That’s because she’s a liar. I know you don’t know this, but it’s a chronic thing with sisters.” She could forget college, she wasn’t even going to last to fall.
“It’s cool, man, there’s nothing wrong with you finding a guy you like. I was happy having a straight friend, but I can deal.” Scratch that, Martin was going to die, of embarrassment, right there at his desk. “Just don’t start flirting with me or anything.” He scoffed, huffed, and tore into his sandwich with feeling.
“Oh please, you couldn’t handle this much man.”
There was a loud thud on the other end of the line as Tonio fell to the ground laughing.
~*~
~*~
In the mid-afternoon a young Osmosian wanders the game trails that crisscross his pack’s territory. His dark and striped skin blends him in well with the mottled sunlight coming through the leaves and fragrant berries and flowers help to cover his scent from the prey he stalks. The goal is a deer, a plump young buck at best, to present as a gift to the object of his affections. A fresh kill, his own lone work, to show his attraction and dedication.
He can taste the remnants of one as easily as he can smell it. Somewhere in the area, he’s certain, is a spot where they sleep, and if he can find it and hide himself properly there then the kill will be easy.
What he doesn’t expect is to catch the scent of something else, something familiar yet unknown, running across the trail. Despite every warning his family has drilled into his head- about other packs, about poachers, about being seen without a disguise- curiosity wins out and pulls him off the trail and into the underbrush as surely as a hook through his nose. The tracks are old, the trail cold, but there’s still enough for a talented youth to follow. Enough to lead him onward, and onward, until nearly an hour has passed.
There’s a cave at the end of the trail. Not suitable for starting a new denning site, the roots of nearby trees are too thick and too close, there’s no room to expand. But still, inside he can taste life. Familiar life. Strange life. It’s with great caution he inches forward to see what there is to find.
The sight is one he knows well from checking on his relatives, on his sisters. A good dozen spheres of speckled grey rest in a depression in the dirt. Each is the size of a basketball, easily the largest he’s ever seen. There may even be more in the darkness, though he doubts it to look at them. Space there may be, but nothing else. Still, more or no, this is something for which he’ll need help, that the older members of the pack should know about, and so he turns and runs back down the faint trail with all the speed he can gather.
Several of the eggs are still glowing.
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scraplette · 7 years
Text
Lost Light #10 Thoughts & Feels
After nearly TWO YEARS we finally reaturn to the titular Lost Light. Oh boy...
As always, under a readmore for them spoilers.
New arc so no LAST TIME segment :)
Word of warming, my dears. I like Getaway. He might've had some valid points regarding Ex-Decepticon warlords, but he's a piece of shit who did some terrible, manipulative things, and I like him. I like that he's an unapologetic bastard. You can enjoy a character and still acknowledge and condemn the terrible things they've done. Sometimes, it's just fun to watch a good villain at work.
So if you don't like Getaway(and you have every reason not to) this recap might not be for you. Then again, it’s not as if I’m showering him in praise.
Onwards!
+This is going to be an interesting arc for me because most of the characters are guys I'm not overly familiar with. I obviously know first Aid(hey cutie) but the rest of his team I haven't a clue.
My knowledge of the Protectobots basically boils down to this. Rook is an afterthought(Combiner Wars was not kind to him) Blades is not an adorable helicopter who likes TV shows. Mirage is the posh one who is sometimes invisible and was a traitor(except he wasn't) and isn't a Protectobot.
Aaaaaaaand that's it. Hopefully the arc will shed some light on these characters.
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Wow, been a while since we've the the Lost Light. Feels weird.
+”I had a plan! Same plan as always:survive.”
Oh, First Aid :(
+Crashing into the shuttle bay isn't a bad plan. Better than exploding in space.
+Whoo. The return of trigger happy security team. Seriously, guys, chill!
+YAY! GETAWAY!
+Hi, Atomizer. Hm, why didn't you slow down? It's not like you didn't recognise the shuttle since it's obviously one belonging to the Lost Light. We saw it at the end of MTMTE #43
I see through your bullshit.
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I adore that I'm scrutinising everything Getaway says. Does this mean, if First Aid had stayed on the LL, he would've sided with the Mutineers? (It does)
+Is Atomizer telling the truth here? If yes, it means the BBC are preparing for something big.
+[Covers face] Getaway is being disgustingly charming and evasive. I love it!
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… I need to see these scenes in the comic. No! Bugger it! I can't wait that long! I'll do it myself! [grabs crayons]
+Rodimus with a Lafuente space colour paintjob would be stunning [fans self]
+”I like him a lot. But I don't know if I trust him.”
First Aid perfectly summing up my Getaway feelings.
+Aw, look at First Aid being all proactive.
+Blades' rambling about “Delphi: Mark 2” seems silly at first, but I think it subtly explains First Aid's mistrust of the whole situation. Delphi was a bitter lesson.
+Love First Aid reminding everyone that he is, in fact, the new CMO. Ratchet said so. Should've gotten him to write it down or something.
+Bugger me. Blades is really growing on me.
+Clever to do a spark scan.
+I'm just going to quietly squee every time Getaway is on page, aren't I?
+THUNDERCLASH [sigh] What a guy.
… Who's in another coma.
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Circles?… Ha. Ha.
Hindsight is a bitch.
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[inhales sharply] You did that on purpose you slimy git ]=<
Sidebar. Seriously, what is Getaway's problem with Rung? Getaway is terrible to everyone but when Rung is involved he becomes oddly blatant about it. During MTMTE #41 he was throwing some serious shade about our favourite nerd bot to Skids, who leapt to Rung's defence because Skids will always be best boy.
I'm wondering if he was jealous of Rung and Skids' friendship.
MOVING ON!
+Oh! We're outside the oil reservoir... Something horrible is in there, isn't it?
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Getaway is lying here. But why? If First Aid accepts the lie that means the rest of the crew are bound to the lie too. Does this mean the crew are prepared to lie for Getaway.
I'm not sure how I feel about this.
+Adore, absolutely adore, how Getaway is making this all about him. Twisting his words to garner sympathy. Ah yessss~
+Mirage's horror over the term “pint”, and the ensuing rant, made me chuckle.
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HE HAS A FACE?!
Not going to lie. I didn't recognise bare faced First Aid and went back a page because I thought I'd missed a panel.
+Nice to see Hoist is still lovely.
+They can only socialise one night a week? Hm, keeping the crew isolated is a clever way to control the spread of information. Maybe I was wrong to think it would be hard for Getaway to maintain such a big lie.
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LIES! ALL LIES!
I don't understand! These are all good people! Why are they lying! Why are they surporting Getaway! Xarron! You're a bloody legal adviser! Hound was there for the #50 transmission! I’m especially baffled given what we find out later in the issue. WHY YOU DO THIS!
UNLESS! Unless... Does Getaway still have the nudge gun?
+What's the Warren? Jackpot? JACKPOOOOOOOT!
+Is the Warren full of super wise space rabbits? I'd be up for that.
+Weeks?! Cyberutopia is weeks away? Wow, I'm glad someone can make sense of the map because it looks like space bibby boop to me.
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Look at this? It's pretty but what does it mean? Are those planets?
Actually, now that I think about it, they've always been very vague about the map. We know they're following the it but they never say where. We're never given names or locations, nothing. Isn't that odd.
And don't you dare think I've forgotten about the map being beamed directly into Rodimus' and THUNDERCLASH'S [sigh] brain.
Oh no, I haven't forgotten.
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[Anguished squeak]
+”I think he was just frustrated. You know Whirl: He's got no idea what he wants, bit he sure as hell knows he hasn't got it.”
Accurate Whirl description is accurate.
+An empty Swerve's is a very depressing sight.
+Blades is very keen on his Delphi: mark II theory.
+What happened to those forty-two people O_O
+AH! Rook spoke! I didn't know he could do that.
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I really like Mirage in this scene. In this instant he's the voice of the audience. Like us, he has a history with a lot of these characters, and it hurts to think your friends could be lying to you.
+Interesting that First Aid balked at the thought of execution considering what he did to Pharma. But, then again, maybe this ties into it. He thought Pharma being dead would make things better but it didn't. Killing Pharma was an act of vengeance and anger, and it effected him deeply.
I'm not saying Megatron not being executed was a good thing, but just like in real life you have people who're against the death penalty. Perhaps First Aid is one of those people.
+Wait! Mirage remembers the two questions! First Aid too! That means they sided with the mutineers!
+RIPTIDE!
+Hang on, Getaway sent the DJD? We know about this deal with the Galactic Council, but we always assumed the DJD was just a sad, very unfortunate, coincidence. How deep does this lie go?
Also, Getaway, that was an unnecessary dick move.
+This does confirm that this was NEVER about getting Megatron off the ship, so toodles to that sort of moral high ground Getaway had.
I'm not surprised but this information because a mutiny was in the works waaaaaay before Megatron's trial.
+SCANDALOUS!
It's just text, but I swear I can feel the sarcasm dripping through the screen. Oh God, it's everywhere! Ease up there, Getaway.
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Wow, that sounds like an actual living Hell.
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WHAT THE HELL GETAWAY!
+Okay, who's been nibbling brains?
+It's just occurred to me that Percy is noticeably absent...
+Not mention of sparks.
+I'm getting the “Bomp that.” speech bubble framed.
+Riptide has been promoted from freaky fish boy to good fish boy.
+I love that “going Full Prowl” is not only a thing but a recognised military tactic. Just mwah, good stuff.
+A little part of me is bummed out that no one thought to use Brainstorm's safeguards.
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Oh no...
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Oh. No.
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SCREEEEEEEE-
So AHEM yeah... Good ending.
+Holy crap. I wonder how many loops First Aid has been through(he’s in every scene so these have to be his memories) what about Riptide? HOW LONG?
O_O
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cutekookie · 7 years
Text
oh hecking heck it's been a while
an actual angel @kookminau has tagged me in a tag game thing. thank u bby 😇❤️ 
 THE LAST: 
 1. drink: ribena my baby my smollest child 2. phone call: my mum bc she was tryna work out how to use facetime lmao 
3. text message: “i just woke up” classic 
4. song you listened to: look here - bangtan 5. time you cried: yesterday after i saw jm and jk in the bon voyage episode hahaha kill me 
6. dated someone twice: no thank god 7. kissed someone and regretted it: ye o boi 8. been cheated on: nah 9. lost someone special: who hasn’t 10. been depressed: ye 11. gotten drunk and thrown up: every time cries
LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS: 
 12-14. gold, red and pink!!!!!!
 IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 
 15. made new friends: yeye❤️❤️❤️ 16. fallen out of love: on reflection p sure it was just infatuation but maybe?? 17. laughed until you cried: yeah omg 
18. found out someone was talking about you: lmao yes always 19. met someone who changed you: yes!
 20. found out who your friends are: hahaha oh boy yes!!! 21. kissed someone on your Facebook list: a few actually Y I K E S
GENERAL: 
22. how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: most of them!! like 97% hahah 
23. do you have any pets: 3 annoying as heck but adorable doggos! 24. do you want to change your name: last name hell yeah 25. what did you do for your last birthday: i got drunk w some cool cats n had ice cream cake quality 26. what time did you wake up: 10am oops 27. what were you doing at midnight last night: i was asleep LMAO but the night before i was reading this rly angsty drarry fic bless 28. name something you can’t wait for: bts to return to aus pls and thank u.. also jikook coming out video lol i h8 myself 29. when was the last time you saw your mom: like 20 mins ago ahah 
30. what is one thing you wish you could change in your life: my height :((( and my head to stop being so hecked up lmao 31. what are you listening to right now: nothing actually haha 
32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: unfortunately
 33. something that is getting on your nerves: a teacher at my school who thinks ive ‘skipped’ school the past few days (side note: NOT MY CHOICE! I HAVE HECKING GASTRO!!!!!) 
34. most visited website: tumblr.com/search/jikook (and fb n shit i guess) 
35. mole/s:one on my neck and one on my cheek ?? i think??but they tiny so not sure if the class as moles lmao 36. mark/s: some faint scars on my knees and face from operations and also a birthmark on my toe! 
37. childhood dream: to be a palleingtologist .. fuck i cant even spell it now. the one where you dig up dinosaurs and shit.  
38. hair colour: black kms school wont let me have bright red.. the second ive graduated tho ill be a firetruck again 39. long or short hair: rn its short as but im tryna grow it out 
40. do you have a crush on someone: yes ❤️ 41. what do you like about yourself: my lips/teeth?? sounds strange but idk i have kinda nice lips n my teeth are p bright n straight so?? 42. piercings: oh god okay bear w me: four on each earlobe, rook, cartlidge, lip. had a second cartilidge, but it fell out. had a second lip piercing, but it fell out. had a septum but then i didnt like it anymore lmao 
43. blood type: no clue tbh 
44. nickname: bumblebee/bee 
45. relationship status: i have a gf kinda not officially 
but p much?? 46. zodiac: capricorn 
47. pronouns: she/her 
 48. favourite tv show: ooo theres a lot. i rly like Shadowhunters and trashy reality stuff tho ;; 
49. tattoos: not yet!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
50. right or left handed: right handed 
51. surgery: knee, tonsils removed, and lip bc i managed to split it open when i was 2 lmao,, wild 52. piercing: im like at least 99.9% sure this was already a q 53. sport: swimming and dancing are the only ones i like participating in, but tennis is cool to watch!! 55. vacation: just went to the usa which was amazing, but have been to fiji, bali, italy, and usa (2 times now) 
56. pair of trainers: i mean the pair of shoes ive owned the longest is a pair of high top red converse lmao come at me joon 
MORE GENERAL: 
57. eating: chips lmao 
58. drinking: nothing 
59. i’m about to: probably read smth idk 
61. waiting for: bedtime im so tired rip 62. want: be happy and also get a photo with jeon jeongguk before i die 63. get married: well @ government make it legal for gays to marry then maybe i can lmao 64. career: maybe a teacher?? idk 65. hugs or kisses: both !!!! i love affection in all forms 66. lips or eyes: usually eyes 
67. shorter or taller: usually taller but my current gf-not-gf is TINY and shes the cutest omg 
68. older or younger: doesnt matter just not a big gap lmao 
70. nice arms or nice stomach: ???? nice heart 
71. sensitive or loud: i mean loud bc same but sensitive bc thats cool too idk??
72. hook up or relationship: relationship for sure 
73. troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant lmao
HAVE YOU EVER: 
 74. kissed a stranger: yeah, back when i was tryna prove i was a Heterosexual 
75. drank hard liquor: every time a massive mistake 76. lost glasses/contact lenses: yes :((( but they always turn up eventually 77. turned someone down: yeah 78. sex on the first date: idk depends on the person?? 79. broken someone’s heart: 
yeah 80. had your heart broken: yeppo 
81. been arrested: nah im a cry baby and terrified of getting in trouble lol 
82. cried when someone died: of course 
83. fallen for a friend: certainly crushed on a friend idk bout fallen tho
DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 
 84. yourself: eh *vague hand gestures* 
85. miracles: maybe,,,, idk 86. love at first sight: nah. i believe in infatuation at first site, and great affection or attraction at first site, but not love. 87. santa claus: i want to in my child heart but nah hhaha. believed until i was 12 tho lmao 
88. kiss on the first date: if ur both down yeah sure why not 89. angels: park jimin exists, so... but yeah maybe?? idk
OTHER: 
90. current best friend’s name: roman n jay god bless 91. eye colour: hazel leaning more on the brown side 92. favourite movie: oh gosh um???? a lot???? few faves are train to busan (killed me), moana, aladdin, mulan, ummmm idk disney and superhero movies and sometimes horrors haha
I TAG: @mindyourfuckinglanguage & @satansgaypornblog p certain jay doesnt even use this any more but fuck it lmao. also @inbts bc u were in my activity also i dont know how else to say hi but by tagging u in a post... so hi!❤️
thank u goodnight as usual feel free to do it if i didnt tag u live ur dreams have fun bye jikook is real
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kiruuuuu · 6 years
Text
Oneshot in which... I don’t even know how to summarise this. Maestro threatens Blitz with an Italian dessert, I suppose. It’s insanity. Enjoy! (Rating T, humour, ~1.8k words) - written for @magehir because the world needs to suffer under the ideas we come up with :)
.
“A-ha! Just the man I was looking for!”
Blitz is this close to simply turning around and booking it as fast as his legs will possibly carry him. His day has been going great so far, he had an extremely productive meeting with Sledge concerning their cooperation with a few certain CTUs, stumbled over Rook trying to get rid of some chocolates of which Blitz more than gladly relieved him and now he’s on his way to fetch his lunch from the fridge in the canteen – but was not at all prepared for the Italian train which keeps running him over unexpectedly.
Maestro who was until just now busy with putting the finishing touches on what looks to be a panna cotta, now whips around and strides towards Blitz with worrying speed. Despite him instinctively cowering before the tall man, he gets dragged in by the collar like a dog who misbehaved – and there isn’t even anyone present whom he could ask for help, not that it should surprise him the canteen is deserted when Maestro is fuming in it.
Recently, the Italian has been in a decidedly rotten mood, extremely easy to anger and not even placated by Sledge who normally has a similar effect on him as horse tranquillisers should (Blitz hasn’t tried it so he can’t know for sure), meaning he turns the whirlwind into nothing more than a soft breeze. Before Maestro’s temper flared for real, Sledge was one of the most popular people on the base purely due to his ability to rescue whoever currently was sentenced to listening to the Italian. In the past week, however, not even Sledge’s gentle touches achieved anything and so everyone has taken to avoid Maestro whenever possible.
Especially Blitz.
Because for some reason, Maestro has taken an, uh, odd liking to him. He doesn’t really know what else to call it seeing as he sees no rhyme nor reason in it, but it seems like he’s being hunted down regularly, only so Maestro can preen in front of him. There’s no established ritual but a lot of similarities between each separate instance and most of them involve Maestro bragging about a variety of skills, inviting Blitz to compare their abilities, be it in archery or gutting a rabbit, and more often than not he displays his really quite impressive body: sometimes he traps Blitz against a wall, showcasing his arm muscles, puts a foot up on the bench where Blitz is sitting or similar antics – and while he’s undeniably attractive, he’s also very much taken.
This is the problem with the whole situation. Maestro reconquered Sledge’s heart immediately upon his return (or maybe it was never not in his possession, with how private the man is it’s just as possible they were in a long distance relationship all these years without anyone noticing) and has been madly in love with him, propagating this fact to everyone who didn’t ask with an uncomfortable amount of gory details. Since Sledge can usually tame him a little, people prefer them being together to Maestro being broken-hearted (and no one wants to imagine that particular horror) but it seems the Italian is fickle enough to shift attention pretty quickly.
At first, he outright ignored Blitz for the most part, talked over him whenever he was having a conversation with Sledge, but a short while ago this tilted over into the complete opposite. Blitz can’t believe Sledge hasn’t noticed yet or maybe he’s scrambling to save what’s still to save behind the scenes, it’s hard to tell also because he feels too guilty to raise the topic to the Scotsman. He doesn’t want to be accused of being a homewrecker. On various occasions, he’s told Maestro to back off, leave him alone; he hasn’t encouraged him in any way though this only seemed to fuel the Mediterranean macho even more.
“Here, taste my cream!”, Maestro demands and points accusingly at the impeccably presented dessert he seemed to have prepared for no one but Blitz.
“I have my own lunch”, Blitz replies, vaguely intimidated, and chooses to ignore the double entendre.
“This is your lunch! Never in your entire life will you ever eat panna cotta cooked to such perfection again – I make the best panna cotta on this continent and you will test this fact for yourself, cesso!”
Blitz doesn’t know what the nicknames Maestro has given him mean but based on the nature of all the others it’s probably dripping with honey. He asked Alibi about one once and she just snickered and said that’s cute. “Look, thank you for offering me food, but I really don’t think -”
“What, you don’t like it? I don’t believe you. Everyone likes it! You’re still growing, right? If you’re not fully grown yet, you need calcium, secchione, and just look at you.” Maestro inexplicably starts poking him, testing his muscles by pinching them harder than necessary and this, of course, is exactly the moment the door to the canteen opens. He throws a panicked glance over to his teammates who seem frozen to the spot in fright as the Italian proceeds to grope Blitz openly. “Here, there’s plenty of room to grow, you baby, you’ve probably never felt real muscles in your life!”
He realises with dawning horror that Maestro is not only inching closer by the second but also seems to be flexing at him, pushing his chest out so his already tight shirt leaves next to nothing to the imagination and yes, he’s – he looks good but could he please get out of Blitz’ face? Preferably soon? “No, I don’t -” Panic is now audible in his voice and he can see more and more people quietly file into the room. “Please stop, Maestro, please just -”
“Have you even seen any? Huh?! I’ll show you, boy!” Maestro has basically backed him into a corner now and Blitz can feel the heat radiating off him.
“I really don’t think this is the why are you taking your shirt off please put your shirt back on what are you -”
“This is what a well-trained body looks like!”, Maestro booms and fluffs himself up like a bird trying to attract a mate and Blitz has literally never been this uncomfortable in his life.
“This is really inappropriate”, he whispers meekly because he doesn’t have the voice for anything else seeing as Maestro is looming over him like an ancient God come to life and uh, wanting to catch up on a number of things. He also looks ready to suffocate Blitz in his chest hair.
“I’ll show you inappropriate”, Maestro shoots back, either not thinking about his words at all or, in fact, considering them very deliberately, “and now taste my fucking cream!”
Blitz is 90% sure no one else in the room is breathing at this point. It’s clear Maestro hasn’t noticed their audience though he’s actually not sure he’d stop if he had. “I don’t want -”
Opening his mouth was quite clearly a mistake as a spoon gets shoved into it, almost choking him and no, this, this is the lowest point in his life.
He’s being accosted by a man almost 10 years his senior who would drive him insane were he forced to stay in a room with him for longer than a few hours – not only that, it’s a foul-mouthed, loud, arrogant Italian who is in a relationship with one of Blitz’ best friends, making this whole situation all kinds of awkward, but on top of that, he’s currently trapped, being molested and violated with dessert and unable to escape because that would mean putting his hands on Maestro’s half naked body. And he’s not doing that. He’s absolutely not doing that.
And while his life flashes before his eyes, he thinks: Damn, this panna cotta is fucking good.
“What’s going on?”, the one voice comes from beside them that Blitz really didn’t want to hear in exactly this moment. Sledge is nonchalantly leaning against the counter next to them, a fond smile playing on his lips as if he was watching an old couple bicker good-naturedly instead of his boyfriend deepthroating his best friend with a spoon.
“I can explain”, Blitz rasps, prompting a death glare from his nemesis.
“You will explain nothing, cesso!”
Sledge’s brows are rising in amusement but as he doesn’t look like he’s going to interfere any second now, both of the two burst out at the same time: “He won’t stop flirting with me!”, Blitz complains and it pains him to speak it out loud, especially in front of everyone, but the truth needs to come out because - “Why would you ever choose him over me, amore?” - he’d hate if he were the one to taint Sledge’s wait what.
Wait.
What?
The two of them stare at each other, probably a perfect mirror in how open-mouthed and unflattering they look. “Are you seriously thinking -”
“Seamus and I are just friends, why would you assume -”
“You’re nothing but an insect to me, needing to be squashed, you’re not -”
“Is this why you’ve been haunting me all this time?! Because you thought -”
“How dare you, I’ve been proving myself to be the better man all this time, showing you all the things you lack, you wet noodle!”
“Excuse me?”
“Yeah, excuse you, you really are a weak excuse of -”
“Then why were you so worried about me stealing Seamus away, huh? If I was no competition in the first place?”
“You seemed willing to stake a claim on something not belonging to you, I was merely -”
“Gentlemen, please.” Both of them shut up simultaneously at Sledge’s soft baritone, whipping their heads around to him in agitation. “Apologise to him for calling him a toilet and a nerd, Adrianito.”
Blitz balks. Is…. is that what those nicknames meant?
“I will never”, Maestro announces, dramatically turns on his heels and stalks away, his exit made less impressive by him having to fight his way through the thoroughly stunned crowd. He also leaves his shirt behind. And his panna cotta.
“Is that”, the German speaks up with hesitation and points to where his personal demon has just disappeared, “is that how he shows jealousy?”
“Oh yeah”, Sledge confirms with a wide grin. “That’s how he establishes dominance.”
His eyes narrow. “If you knew this entire time, why didn’t you interfere?”
“Are you kidding me? This was the funniest thing I’ve ever seen.” And with a chuckle, Sledge leaves as well, probably to appease his livid boyfriend.
Blitz rubs his face with a deep sigh and then notices half of the base still staring at him. “Fuck off!”, he barks at them and watches them scramble to get away in satisfaction. Maybe now he can finally eat his lunch in peace.
And like this, no one will watch him eat the panna cotta. It really is delicious.
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kiruuuuu · 6 years
Text
Sledge/Glaz oneshot in which Glaz’ dignity gets ambushed and beaten up in a dark alley. Who needs enemies when you can have Rook and Mute as friends? (Rating T/M, fluff/humour, ~1.8k) - for @magehir (because who else would want to see an innocent man suffer)
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Lunch breaks are the best. Really, they’re Glaz’ favourite time of day, if he missed one he’d fall into a deep pit of depression, he loves them so much he’d like to track down the ancestors of the person who invented the lunch break and worship the ground they walk on. He wouldn’t mind not sleeping for a week if it meant that lunch breaks would be an hour longer, he’d give his arm and his leg and probably some other body parts as well and there’s no way he’s obsessing about this, absolutely not, he’s just really excited about lunch breaks, okay?
It has nothing to do with the fact that there are only few people in the kitchenette at this time, one of which happens to be British and tall and kind and who is he even kidding. It has everything to do with it. In fact, it’s literally the only reason he’s started coming here in the first place, normally he eats outside whenever possible or in the company of his fellow countrymen or his other friends and would’ve complained both ways had someone dragged him to the small kitchen and back. He prefers sunlight – however, Sledge’s presence counts as a viable substitute because while the sun manages to heat up his skin, make him relax and feel cosy and comfortable, Sledge does exactly the same thing exactly the same way: just by existing. And so, nowadays, he spends his lunch breaks here.
Since Sledge often has other matters to attend to, he’s rarely alone, is usually surrounded by other SAS operators from Hereford, some of Six’ underlings or members of Rainbow – he’s never really on break and so they don’t talk most of the time which suits Glaz just fine. He doesn’t need to converse with him to bask in his presence, to feel his knees weaken whenever his accent gets unintelligibly thick, to observe him out of the corner of his eye. Besides, Glaz has things to do as well, it’s not like his entire day revolves around Sledge, he has no trouble finding activities that have nothing to do -
“Oh, you’re drawing Seamus again?”, Rook might as well scream into the small room from behind Glaz’ shoulder. He didn’t hear him coming but wishes he did because said Scot glances over at them curiously right before going back to his discussion with Tachanka, undoubtedly having heard the blunt announcement. “Scoot over.” The Frenchman squeezes onto the bench next to him, closely followed by Mute who pushes in from the other side, effectively trapping Glaz between them. “Don’t you have anything better to do?”
“Of course he does, but he’s busy right now”, Mute replies and indicates Sledge with his chin.
Glaz closes his sketchbook before the two can drop more detailed comments about his drawings and fights against the flush rising to his cheeks. Fights and fails. “Look”, he says levelly and doesn’t even know how to continue because anything he responds can and will be used against him. Ever since the other two found out about his hopeless infatuation, he hasn’t had a single quiet minute. He can only pray that Sledge doesn’t get wind of it which might mean the end of lunch breaks and staring at him secretly and, honestly, the end of Glaz. There’s no way he could ever recover if Sledge found out.
“Can I see?”, a voice asks politely and Glaz has the sudden urge to violently toss his sketchbook through the window and then pretend he has no idea what Sledge is talking about.
“Sure, here!” Rook readily snatches the book from Glaz’ hands and shoves it into Sledge’s. “Make sure to flip through it all.”
His fingers are itching to take it back immediately but that would only raise more suspicion, so he silently glares at Rook and attempts to murder him with his gaze alone. Without success. Meanwhile, Sledge is leafing through the pages with an absent-minded smile and Glaz befalls a sudden panic upon not remembering of which nature the other drawings are. Did he - “It’s really good. You draw me a lot”, Sledge points out and returns the book. It sounds friendly and unsuspecting but who would his friends be if they left it at that?
“He also drew you butt naked”, Mute announces helpfully, “but since he hasn’t actually seen you fully nude, he botched your dick size. Way too small.”
“Yeah, you should rectify that and show him.”
“Oh, of course, meet me after work”, Sledge addresses Glaz with a good-natured grin and a wink to which the other two burst out into laughter.
Glaz wants to evaporate into thin air. It’s painfully obvious that Sledge thinks they’re joking yet all the younglings are just as painfully aware that they’re not, that Glaz did try to draw him like that and Mute found it and really, it’s his own fault for hiding it in plain sight, meaning under a loose floorboard that can only be moved once his bed is pushed aside inside a box with a lock whose key Glaz keeps on his person at all times. How irresponsible of him.
“It’s probably the fact that he always draws during breaks and since he’s usually here, he draws what he sees”, Rook explains to Glaz’ instant suspicion. It’s a good excuse, lacking any euphemisms or second thoughts, so there has to be something -
“Yeah, why are you here all the time recently?”
He stares at Mute who meets his gaze with an irritating smirk. He’s basically forcing his hand. “Because I’ve developed a sudden craving for tea”, he grits out unwillingly, making Sledge spring into action.
“That’s right, I almost forgot!” The Scotsman turns away and picks up his argument with Tachanka again while he sets out to boil some filtered water and Glaz buries his head in his hands.
“I hate you both so fucking much”, he whispers to gleeful giggling.
“We brought you some presents, by the way.” They quickly reach into their pockets and begin stuffing Glaz’ with their contents, wrappers crinkling and he realises with growing horror what they are. “Hopefully, you’ll need ‘em someday.”
“Are you nuts?! You can’t – take them back, you Neanderthals!”
“But we have no use for them”, Rook protests and shoves them deeper into Glaz’ pockets, swatting his hands away, “they’re the biggest size, you’re the only one who realistically -”
“It’s all you need, I’ve discovered his lube stash but figured you might not wanna get frosted right away -”
“Oh my God, shut up”, Glaz hisses exasperatedly and probably would have thrown both of them off the bench hadn’t Sledge returned right then and set down two cups of tea on the table in front of them. He’s too mortified to even thank him, his ears burning and his mind conjuring up entirely inappropriate images that only exacerbate the whole situation.
“You don’t take sugar either, do you?”, Sledge asks Mute and is granted a sweet smile in return.
“No, but like Glaz, I take cream.”
A questioning glance to the Russian whose embarrassment is approaching critical levels. “I don’t – I’ll drink it like this. As always. Uh, thanks.” He can’t stand tea. Another bullet point on the very long list of things that, unfortunately, Rook and Mute know but Sledge doesn’t, and so they never miss an opportunity to remind him of his ‘newfound love’ of the swill. Additionally, Glaz made the mistake in the beginning to claim he drank it pure, like Sledge, in an entirely misguided attempt to impress him. It did work, to an extent, but he still curses himself for it because he’s had to drink a cup almost every day for the past few weeks now.
“Oh? I thought you loved cream”, Mute says innocently. “My mistake. Maybe you’ll start having it eventually.”
Glaz is starting to tip over into a murderous rage but is momentarily distracted by the fact that Rook wordlessly drops a few sugar cubes into his tea as soon as Sledge isn’t watching for which he is eternally grateful yet also deeply confused. “Why in the world do you have those?”
“Are you alright, boy?”, a booming voice is directed at him all of a sudden, making him jump. “You’re so red in the face, are you sick?”
“I’m fine, don’t worry, it’s just a bit warm -”
“It’s not warm at all, what are you talking about?” Tachanka is undeterred and ignores Glaz even though he repeatedly insists that he’s alright. “Nonsense, you’re never this red. Do you have a fever? Seamus, check whether my boy has a fever.”
But Sledge, the absolute angel, must’ve noticed something, probably a cry for help in Glaz’ eyes or just his general distress because he not only refuses but also compliments Tachanka out of the room, saving Glaz the indignity of a prolonged interrogation during which he’d either have to lie repeatedly or shoot himself in the face afterwards. He thinks he’s safe for exactly two and a half seconds, then a broad hand comes to rest on his forehead unexpectedly. The touch is gentle and the hazel eyes looking down at him soft and Glaz swoons. “Doesn’t feel like a fever”, Sledge murmurs, “if you feel fine, it’s probably nothing.”
While he walks back to the counter to clean and tidy, Glaz is still stunned by the fact that a simple gesture could incapacitate him like this, make him forget all about his surroundings and just wallow in his daydreams that are sweet and lovely and - “Oh, look at the time”, Mute mumbles next to him, “it’s time for your knickers to get wet.” And he knocks over his own cup of tea.
He does it so strategically that almost all of it sloshes over Glaz, soaks his t-shirt and trousers and yes, his underwear too. He’s lucky it’s not too hot anymore but he curses colourfully regardless, attempts to jump up but only hits his knees on the table until Rook takes pity on him and gets up so he can escape the dripping mess – and it only registers after Sledge’s words why Mute would do this.
“Are you alright? Did you burn yourself? Stand still.” He’s by Glaz’ side immediately, rubbing his trousers with a towel and Glaz is too shocked to react or shy away from the touch when it reaches his pockets, making them crinkle audibly. “Ah, you’d better empty your pockets, lad.”
And Glaz wants to perish.
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