#Rob Ryan NFL

[sohaibsmart]

USC names NFL veteran Rob Ryan its new linebackers coach

With its rising star defensive coordinator secured, USC crammed the ultimate emptiness on its defensive workers Saturday, naming a longtime NFL defensive coordinator with 35 years of expertise its linebackers coach. Rob Ryan spent 17 years as an NFL coordinator, main defenses in Buffalo, Oakland, Cleveland, New Orleans and Dallas. In Buffalo, the place twin brother Rex Ryan was head coach, Rob…

[mydaddywiki]

Buddy Ryan

Physique: Husky Build Height: 5"10"

James David "Buddy" Ryan (February 17, 1931 – June 28, 2016; aged 85) was an American football coach in the NFL and AFL. During his 35-season coaching career, Ryan served as the head coach of the Philadelphia Eagles from 1986 to 1990, and of the Arizona Cardinals from 1994 to 1995. Ryan also served as the defensive coordinator of the Chicago Bears from 1978 to 1985, and of the Houston Oilers in 1993. Coaching multiple Hall of Fame defensive players throughout his career, Ryan is considered by many to be one of the greatest defensive minds in the history of American football.

Authentic and ornery, Ryan had that rugged, tough look that always get me going. Even his sons, Rex Ryan and Rob Ryan have it to some degree, but not the way Buddy did.

Born in Frederick, Oklahoma, Ryan played college football for Oklahoma A&M University (now Oklahoma State) where he earned four letters as a guard between 1952 and 1955. He served as a sergeant in the United States Army during the Korean War. Following his service in the military, Ryan's a career as a defensive troubadour began, winding its way through New York, Minnesota, Chicago, Philadelphia, Houston and Arizona.

Twice married, Ryan had had three sons, including fraternal twins, Rex and Rob with his first wife, Doris Ryan. Ryan married his second wife, Joanie Ryan in 1970. Ryan died on June 28, 2016, on his ranch in Shelbyville, Kentucky, at the age of 85, after a lengthy illness. Ryan's passion for the game often made him a divisive figure. As a coordinator, he warred with his head coach and fellow assistants. Most memorably, Ryan throwing a punch at Kevin Gilbride on the sideline of a nationally televised game. And he stay in the back of my mind ever since.

Career Highlights and Awards 2× Super Bowl champion as assistant coach (III, XX)

Head Coaching Record Regular season: 55–55–1 (.500) Postseason: 0–3 (.000) Career: 55–58–1 (.487)

[bisexual-yuri]

“Can’t you tell?”

Busdriverr gets credits for songs he ain’t on

And here’s another one 

I wanna meet LA’s native son 

Pentecost, bitches, LA bus driver’s got bitches 

Can’t Messais tell I won’t say it 

Record it, I’ll deny it 

That shit never left my mouth 

Revolve it

Solve it 

Sit the fuck down, clown 

You and me, you legit now 

Sara can’t spell

Reagan, really? 

Ali

Wants to join hell fire club, no city 

Cats fucking in the back alley 

Yowling, screaming, towely 

Ryan was his name, water polo Ricky 

Who gave Scott his hickeys?

It’s a killer deep cut from her Binghamton days

She got degrees and dogs that was strays 

Demon days, gorillaz fans fundamentally 

Logan and Elliott, exes perpetually

Remember me

Ali wants to join the hell fyre club 

White girl, did you heard? Crazy 

Show all signs of blender brain 

ECMC psych ward vet, she clinically insane 

Jacket girlie, Tom Brady, 11 + 12 

Hell Fyre, Los Angeles, homie 

Maybe finally Brooklyn was the first place she moved 

She’s the one who does what behooves her

Everyone scrambles to claim her

Nobody can tame her 

Her name is Allison dot FYRE

Buffalo Baby

Seven one sixty 

Misty 

Water Pokemon training

Lucky lucky licky

Mathy

Talented lady 

Pretty baby 

Kids, if you want to piss off your parents

Show interest in imaginary places

Invest in real estate in art time 

Tell your mother that you’re fine when you’re not

Run the snot 

Ali wants to join the hell fyre club 

White girl, did you heard? Crazy 

Show all signs of blender brain 

ECMC psych ward vet, she clinically insane 

Chris went to Auto, what does that even MEAN

She had mono once, almost ruptured her spleen

Rugby player in dresses, Chris, you’re just preening

Ali has a huge crush on you and you’re dreaming

You heard her screaming

Ran away, reported her, you’re reaming her out in the office

Snitching to Santos

Sorry Chris Chris, you’ll always be haunted by this ghost

Of what might have been

If you had trusted, showed better to love to your friend 

It’s the end of you and me and maybe your career

Sara’s headed to Seattle, it’s all your fault I fear 

She stood up for herself and you bit at her rear 

Ali wants to join the hell fyre club 

She can back that shit up 

Fundamentally 

Upstate Macy’s, rob sonic pep rally 

References sadly 

She’s in love, madly

Two, maybe three Rafaels 

It’s a malady 

R names, at least she’s over Ricardo now 

Tragedy 

He got jokes folks, some bitch named Ortiz 

BUSDRIVER be friends with Ian and Mikey 

Yikes-y! 

I gotta get my own posse 

Hell fire, Aly’s on fire wait wasn’t it Ali with i latín?

Latina, honra la familia 

Trilingual cunt

Wait, ain’t she poly? 

Glot, she gotta talented tongue 

Free for the year

Mung

Bean girl 

Hehe beans 

What does she MEAN? 

Ali wants to join the hell fyre club 

She can back that shit up 

Fundamentally 

References sadly 

She’s in love, madly

It’s a malady 

Young

Black men love her

Claim her, want to tame her 

In Delaware park, Chris and M man 

Guitar player shit, like hot damn 

Suckin’ dick and having small hands 

Rafael from Disco Elysium, Harrier 

Funny, I got that tattoo 

I’m not no fuckin Boston Terrier 

Not from New England, bitch 

I’m no Masshole 

Calling Nate Pinkham, asshole 

Carousel & Windmills, Nick Foles 

Tyler bass kicks a mean field goal 

NFL References again 

He aint even like football like that 

He? That’s Ali, she’s all that 

Ali wants to join the hell fyre club 

She can back that shit up at the drop of a hat 

What, Ali’s a massive fan! 

She’s always got ten backup plans! 

Bro, her name’s Sae Ra, she’s no man 

Not a girl bro, Ali’s just Billscord’s biggest ho 

Chris just doesn’t know when to say no 

Moderator Rizz, love her, poor pages 

She’s a magic user, really, mages 

Wedding bells, Discord van 

Cro-magnon man, don’t be a fan

She ain’t like that man, you just ain’t know her man 

Ali wants to join the hell fyre club 

She can back that shit up 

Ali’s a teacher, no preacher, ban 

Hammer swinger and detective 

She’s a momma bear, real protective 

Jonathan fucked her young, she’s reactive

You prey on her babies, she’ll cut a shiv 

Shank you in jail bitch, Ali ain’t play

You gotta watch what you say 

Ali wants to join the hell fyre club 

She can back that shit up 

Shell bottom from the power

Rachel’s guilty, she feels filthy

Jonathan turned her against me

Maybe those two will finally just fess up and get married

They picked each other over me 

Bye buddy, that ain’t family 

You just look for exquitie ways to hurt me and I’m sick of it 

I ain’t gotta take this shit 

I’m leaving you behind and I won’t look back

You sure love to talk smack for a jewish guy from Brooklyn 

You’re not Bernie bitch, listen 

You have met me, you know me 

New phase in life, most likely

Big name change, I go by Ali 

Writer flighty, not likely 

Never leaving, Troglodyte wins 

Sara’s a dolphin

She sings with no phins 

Jack’s got his tins

Used to sell knives but never atoned for his sins 

Hello Mu from the ether 

IDK how I never met you before

Sorry I got called whore 

Being a girl’s a snore 

Ian loves you man 

He a rapper and more for you man 

Camu Tao, don’t be blue

RIP Mu 

[youngeditor1999]

Favorite crackships?

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS ANON!!!!!! 🤩🔥💯💥

Crackships are silly but also super fun!! (: 💓

Alright, so the very first one that came to mind was Kono Kalakaua/Danny Williams from the 2010 reboot of Hawaii Five-0.

Now, I am definitely a very loyal McDanno (Steve McGarrett/Danny Williams) girlie through and through. I also really enjoy(ed) Kono's relationship with Adam!!

That being said...

Kono and Danny had some flirtations during the very first few season one episodes. They for sure would have been cute together and really would have made an excellent couple overall. 🥰

Speaking of Hawaii Five-0...

Steve McGarrett and Dean Winchester is also a fave.

They feel so right to me in a way that truly doesn't make a lot of sense, which is how I know that this is an excellent crackship.

Perhaps they are too similar to each other, but then again, that's what would be fun about watching and reading about them!!

Next on this list, I'm gonna say Troy/Kelsi from High School Musical.

They are only a crackship because of how iconic Troy/Gabriella are...if Troy/Gabriella weren't the main romantic couple of the trilogy (Chad and Ryan aside of course because they definitely count, even if they weren't canon-canon! 💓), then I fully believe that they would have had more potential.

Troy complimented her song writing/composition abilities in the first movie and then at the end of HSM 1, literally gave her the championship basketball because she was "the playmaker". 🥺🥲😩💞

Also, all of the most romantic songs that Kelsi wrote for Troy and Gabriella...there was always just a little something extra there that made me think that she was moreso thinking about Troy and herself when she was writing them. 🤷🏻‍♀️

It's hard to explain exactly what I mean because of course Kelsi was always super respectful to Gabriella and Troy and Gabriella's relationship in general.

But I just feel that there was so much potential for them!! They definitely could have worked out and lasted way past high school. 💗

But yeah, they are also a major crackship because Troy was always hella smitten with Gabriella, even when he maybe shouldn't have been. 👀

Moving on, I have to mention Olivia Pope/Mellie Grant from Scandal.

They have so much history and moments together that really solidified them into the Crackship Hall of Fame. Maybe they aren't as cracky as what some crackships are, but they would have probably raised more than a few eyebrows if they had ever been real.

And for the record, Fitz didn't deserve either of them!!!!! 😤

Onto Law and Order: SVU...

Olivia Benson/Nick Amaro is a hardcore crackship.

There's no way Liv would have ever hooked up with Nick for realisies, but it's still hella fun to imagine what that would look like (:

I am also counting Elliot Stabler/Alex Cabot as a crackship!!!

They have just as much energy and chemistry as what Benson/Stabler and Benson/Cabot do.

It's easy to forget about them because of these factors, but it's also what makes them so nice to consider from time to time. (:

Next, I'd be amiss of I didn't mention Megan Calvet-Draper/Joan (Holloway) Harris from Mad Men!!

This is a pairing that literally doesn't make sense at all for many reasons. I still like to think about them together anyway though because it's fun and crazy!!

Finally, last but not least, I must mention all of my NFL RPF ships. (Tom/Rob, Tom/Jules, Jules/Danny, Joe/Ja'Marr etc.)

These are all crackships because they of course focus on real, living people who, no matter how damn obvious they are, have never confirmed real relationships with any of the people I ship them with. 🥴🫣😶‍🌫️😔

Ok!!

...I think that's all of 'em for now. 🙂

That was way more than what I was first thinking when I originally received this ask!! 😱🤯😵‍💫

At the end of the day, though I have my set OTPs, it's cool to think about different fandom pairings in way that isn't usually seen. 🥰

I hope that you have enjoyed reading all of my crazy and random answers, anon!!!

Thank you again for sending this in; I had a lot of fun working on it!!!!! 🌟

[f1]

Alpine secures 200m backing from investors including Ryan Reynolds

Alpine secures €200m backing from investors including Ryan Reynolds By Balazs Szabo on 26 Jun 2023, 11:39 Alpine have secured a €200m backing from investors including Hollywood actors Ryan Reynolds and Rob McElhenney who are set to join an investor group taking a 24 per cent equity stake in the French car manufacturer's F1 outfit. On Monday morning, Alpine's parent company Renault announced a €200 million investment from Otro Capital and their partner, RedBird Capital Partners, along with Maximum Effort Investments in Alpine Racing. The injection represents a 24% equity stake while Renault’s engine division in Viry will remain entirely owned by the Renault Group. The transaction values Alpine Racing Ltd around $900 million following this investment with the team expecting the move to accelerate their growth plans and sporting ambitions in F1. The Investor Group has a strong track record of company-building with recognized partners such as the Dallas Cowboys, Fenway Sports Group, the NFL, Toulouse FC and Wrexham AFC. Alpine F1 team will also benefit from the Investor Group's expertise in data and technology, key enablers of marketing and commercial performance. Alec Scheiner, Co-Founder and Partner of Otro Capital, will join Alpine Racing Ltd’s Board of Directors. Commenting on the announcement, Alpine CEO Laurent Rossi said: “This association is an important step to enhance our performance at all levels. First, Otro Capital, RedBird Capital Partners and Maximum Effort Investments, as international players with strong track record in the sports industry, will bring their recognized expertise to boost our media and marketing strategy, essential to support our sporting performance over the long term. "Second, the incremental revenue generated will in turn be reinvested in the team, in order to further accelerate our Mountain Climber plan, aimed at catching up with top teams in terms of state-of-the-art facilities and equipment.” Co-Founder and Partner of Otro Capital Alec Scheiner added: “We are thrilled to have the opportunity to invest in Alpine F1. We believe in the management of the company, the value of the brand as well as the long-term trajectory of the sport. We believe that, along with our partners RedBird and Maximum Effort Investments, we can add value to Alpine's business operations and brand building, especially in North America.” Co-Founder of Maximum Effort Investments James Toney commented: “Maximum Effort Investments focuses on unlocking value through the power of storytelling, and we believe there is tremendous untapped potential in Alpine Racing. "We are eager to help shine a light on this incredible team. We’re thankful to our partners at Otro Capital and RedBird Capital Partners and look forward to diving in with them, as well as our co-investors Michael B. Jordan and Rob McElhenney." via F1Technical.net . Motorsport news https://www.f1technical.net/news/

[metacriticc-news]

Rackham vs Birmingham: The most expensive Premier League match, live on Ski Sports | Football news

Before the arrival of the two Hollywood stars and NFL legends, the only notable history shared between Wrexham and Birmingham was the £1m the Blues paid for Brian Hughes in 1997, which remains the Welsh side’s record transfer fee. Rackham, owned by actors Ryan Reynolds and Rob McElhenney, is now locked in a promotional battle with leaders Birmingham, which is powered by funds from American…

[cryptoto]

Wrexham vs Birmingham: The most expensive Premier League match, live on Sky Sports | Football News

Before the arrival of the two Hollywood stars and NFL legends, the only notable history shared between Wrexham and Birmingham was the £1m the Blues paid for Bryan Hughes in 1997, which remains the record transfer fee for the Welsh side. Wrexham, owned by actors Ryan Reynolds and Rob McElhenney, are now locked in a promotion battle with leaders Birmingham, who are fueled by funds from American…

[hamsdd]

Wrexham vs Birmingham: The most expensive Premier League match, live on Sky Sports | Football News

Before the arrival of the two Hollywood stars and NFL legends, the only notable history shared between Wrexham and Birmingham was the £1m the Blues paid for Bryan Hughes in 1997, which remains the record transfer fee for the Welsh side. Wrexham, owned by actors Ryan Reynolds and Rob McElhenney, are now locked in a promotion battle with leaders Birmingham, who are fueled by funds from American…

[sportskeeda-updates]

"Terrific addition to the staff": CFB world surprised by USC upgrading coaching roster with NFL legend Rob Ryan's addition https://www.sportskeeda.com/college-football/terrific-addition-staff-cfb-world-surprised-usc-upgrading-coaching-roster-nfl-legend-rob-ryan-s-addition?key4=sktumblr&utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=tumblr

[home-inspiration-blog]

USC hires Rob Ryan as assistant coach for the defense

LOS ANGELES — D’Anton Lynn was born into the NFL, his father Anthony Lynn the former head coach of the Chargers. But his introduction to coaching in the NFL, as D’Anton Lynn once said, was Rex Ryan. A slew of influences, since Lynn started in the NFL as an intern with Ryan’s Jets in 2014, have left their mark, like former Chargers defensive coordinator Gus Bradley and current Seahawks head coach…

[gurutrends]

Wrexham's 'Hollywood derby' rematch vs Birmingham pushed forward after big TV decision as Ryan Reynolds & Rob McElhenney seek revenge over Tom Brady under Racecourse floodlights

Getty WHAT HAPPENED? The Red Dragons suffered a 3-1 defeat against the big-spending Blues at St Andrew’s in September, with NFL legend Brady, McElhenney and ex-England captain David Beckham among those in attendance for that League One contest. THE BIGGER PICTURE A return date had been pencilled in for January 25. Said contest will now take place two days earlier on January 23, with Wrexham…

[mydaddywiki]

Rex Ryan

Physique: Husky Build Height: 6’ 4" (191 cm)

Rex Ashley Ryan (born December 13, 1962) is an American former football coach and analyst. Ryan was formerly the head coach of the New York Jets and Buffalo Bills of the NFL, and also held various coaching positions with seven other NFL and college teams. Ryan is the son of former head coach Buddy Ryan and is the fraternal twin brother of Rob Ryan. He currently serves as an analyst, most notably on Sunday NFL Countdown.

Born in Ardmore, Oklahoma, Rex attended Southwestern Oklahoma State University, alongside Rob, and played for the football team as a defensive end. He graduated from Southwestern Oklahoma in 1986.

Ryan’s coaching career started in 1987-88 when he was a graduate assistant at Eastern Kentucky. After moving onto New Mexico Highlands (1989) and Morehead State (1990-93), Ryan then spent two seasons (1994-95) with the Arizona Cardinals under his father, Buddy Ryan. He returned to the college ranks as the defensive coordinator at Cincinnati (1996-97), Oklahoma (1998) and Kansas State (1999).

Prior to being named a head coach, Ryan spent ten seasons (1999-2008) as an NFL assistant with the Baltimore Ravens – including 2005-08 as defensive coordinator – where he won a Super Bowl (XXXV). Ryan spent eight years as an NFL head coach, first with the New York Jets (2009-14) and then with the Buffalo Bills (2015-16). Afterwards, he was hired by ESPN, where he currently serves as an analyst, including on Sunday NFL Countdown.

Rex and his wife Michelle have two sons, Payton and Seth. From the the toe-sucking adventures and the Mark Sanchez jersey tattoo, I don’t know why I want to fuck Rex? Maybe because he’s such a freak that I think if I lay my game done, I might have a shot with him. Then again, I’d fuck any spawn of Buddy Ryan, even Rex’s twin brother Rob Ryan with his long hair.

Career Highlights and Awards Super Bowl champion (XXXV) PFWA NFL Assistant Coach of the Year (2006)

Head Coaching Record Regular season: 61–66 (.480) Postseason: 4–2 (.667) Career: 65–68 (.489)

[pint4punt]

On a Scale of Russell Wilson to Tom Brady:

How successful will Aaron Rodgers run with the Jets be?

The Nathaniel Hackett and Aaron Rodgers reunion did end up happening after all……just not in Denver (sorry Broncos Country, enjoy the ride with Russ). Instead he emerged from the darkness to join the New York Jets and give them legitimate Super Bowl aspirations for the first time in over a decade. That being said, we've seen very different versions of this movie before. The academy award winning epics that were Tom Brady and Matthew Stafford's first year with the Bucs and Rams respectively and Russell Wilson’s bootleg porno version of those movies you illegally downloaded by accident. You thought you were getting to watch Harry Potter work magic with his wand and instead……well you got a very different version of that same premise.

The point is, the NFL is more complicated than take Player A insert into Team B and experience immediate success. What Brady and Stafford accomplished were both truly remarkable and what happened with Wilson, well fuck if any of us know. So how does Rodgers’ opportunity compare to the last few vets to jettison their home for a promising team on the rise? Today we’ll look across the board and see which team was most appealing for their eventual signal caller in a variety of areas such as roster, resources, division, coaching staff and more. We will be skipping one honorable mention in Matt Ryan who had a similar opportunity with the Colts because well….. nothing about the Colts’ 2022 season is worth revisiting. Let’s start with:

The Squads

The Bucs:

-Mike Evans (3 Pro Bowls & 2016 Second-Team All-Pro*)

-Chris Godwin (1 Pro Bowl & 2019 Second-Team All-Pro*)

-Shaq Barrett (Super Bowl 50 Champion, 2019 Second-Team All Pro*)

*before Tom Brady joined the team

The Bucs team that eventually landed the GOAT boasted incredible pass catchers that far exceeded anything Brady had at his deploy in recent years. They also had a defense that could close games and had gone nearly .500 with a Quarterback who had thrown 30 interceptions the year before.

The run game left a lot to be desired and there wasn’t that reliable safety blanket for 3rd and long situations, but Brady’s legacy attracted the likes of Leonard Fournette (2,631 yards & 17 TDs in his first 3 seasons) and Antonio Brown (7 Pro Bowls & 4 All-Pros) while even luring Rob Gronkowski (5 Pro-Bowls & 4 All-Pros) out of a retirement we all felt was premature.

The Rams:

-Cooper Kupp (288 receptions for 3,570 yards*)

-Robert Woods (Two 1,000+ yard seasons)

-Aaron Donald (7 Pro Bowls, 6 All-Pros, 3-time DPOY*)

-Jalen Ramsey (4 Pro Bowls & 2 All-Pros*)

-Andrew Whitworth (4 Pro Bowls & 2 All-Pros)

*before Matthew Stafford joined the team

The Rams team that acquired Matthew Stafford was mostly successful under Jared Goff. But Sean McVay was certain they needed one more piece to get over the top. And what better match for a team that had continually underachieved than a guy who had continually underachieved!

Well despite our cynicism, this ended up being the right move too. Not only did Stafford join a team fraught with elite players, his play and the Rams’ aggressiveness attracted more. By the end of the year the Rams had cast household names such as Von Miller (Super Bowl 50 Champion w/ 8 Pro Bowls & 3 All-Pros) and Odell Beckham Jr. (3-time Pro Bowler w/ Five 1,000+ yard seasons) to win a Lombardi at home in Los Angeles (and likely an eventual Oscar for the film rights).

The Broncos:

-Courtland Sutton (2019 Pro Bowler)

-Jerry Jeudy (157 Receptions for 2,295 Yards in first 3 seasons)

-Tim Patrick (11 TDs from 2020 to 2021)

-Javonte Williams (903 yards in Rookie Season)

-Patrick Surtain (2021 PFWA All-Rookie Team*)

-Bradley Chubb (2020 Pro Bowler & 2018 PFWA All-Rookie Team*)

*before Russell Wilson joined the team

At face value, the Broncos’ Team that Russell Wilson joined was talented, but totally unproven. A lot of their hype was based on potential and what players might become in a competent Offense.

Having whored around with 11 starting Quarterbacks since Peyton Manning gave them a night they will never forget, the Broncos were desperate for any form of stability they could find. Rumors were abound that Rodgers was actually their first choice, but another Super Bowl winning Quarterback with 9 Pro Bowls seemed like a hell of a consolation prize. We don’t need to tell you it was not. Denver fans are hoping and praying that Hackett was the real problem and injuries to key contributors in Williams and Patrick certainly didn’t help, but it’s pretty hard to unsee the disaster that was Dangeruss’ 2022 season.

The Jets:

-Garrett ‘Offensive Rookie of the Year’ Wilson

-Sauce ‘Defensive Rookie of the Year’ Gardner

-Quinnen Williams (2022 First Team All-Pro)

-Breece Hall (Perennial Ass Kicker before ACL Tear)

-Allen Lazard & Randall Cobb (Rodgers’ Boys)

The New York Jets were the darling of Draft Analysts last offseason. And while a lot of those idiots give blistering hot takes that age like milk every year, they were right to exude praise on this Jets’ class. Sauce Gardner allowed the lowest passer rating and completions from opposing QBs while holding the highest PFF Coverage Grade AS A ROOKIE.

On the other side of the ball, Breece Hall looked like a budding super star before an unfortunate ACL tear ended his season prematurely, while Garrett Wilson put up over 1,100 yards in his first year despite Quarterback play that was so god damn awful they should add a provision in the Geneva Convention to prevent any fanbase from suffering such atrocity ever again. But moving away from Zach Wilson isn’t the only benefit of acquiring Rodgers. Like their counterparts in LA and Tampa Bay, New York is already reaping the benefits of the proven veteran’s presence, as it enabled them to win the Dalvin Cook sweepstakes, adding a four-time Pro Bowl Running Back to their suddenly robust Offense.

Winner: Bucs

It’s tough not to go Rams here based on what Cooper Kupp ended up achieving with Stafford, but based on the situation each QB walked into, Tampa Bay was the most established at the time. After all, two Pro Bowl receivers and an Elite Defense is about as appealing as it gets for a Quarterback.

The Divisions

The Bucs (NFC South):

Tom Brady walked into a division that featured established, but aging veteran Quarterbacks in Drew Brees & Matt Ryan and a Carolina team that was…‘retooling’ to put it politely.

Outside of the Saints, who were coming off of a dominant 13-3 season (albeit with an embarrassing home playoff loss to Kirk Cousins), the division as a whole failed to eclipse .500. Matt Rhule’s reign of terror was in its infancy and Matt Ryan was still traumatized from his previous showdown with Tom.

The Rams (NFC West)

While Stafford’s debut with his new team ended the same as Brady’s, his path could not have been more different. Stafford arrived via a trade as opposed to free agency, which given the time and place, was basically the equivalent of being drafted to go to Vietnam. The NFC West was a bloodbath and the consensus best division in football a few years ago.

Russell Wilson was still playing at a high level for Seattle, Arizona had a strong cast and a young QB in Kyler Murray who was a pain in the ass to tackle, and the 49ers had been Sean McVay’s Daddy for a few years at that point.

The Broncos (AFC West):

Much like Stafford, Russell Wilson arrived via trade and certainly was not facing the path of least resistance. While the AFC West didn’t quite live up to the off-season hype as the new crown jewel division of the NFL, it still featured household names such as Davante Adams, Derwin James, Travis Kelce, and of course all ran through Patrick Mahomes who has never missed an AFC Championship since taking over as the starter for Kansas City.

Needless to say, Wilson entered a division that, on paper, looked every bit as fierce as the one he had just left. The only question was, could he elevate Denver to finally compete for the AFC West? Well obviously the answer was no, as even with the Raiders being a major disappointment in their own right, The Wilson led Broncos only rattled off one measly division win in 2022.

The Jets (AFC East)

The AFC East has come a long way from being Bill Belichik’s bitch year in and year out. The fact that Belichik’s squad is probably the least intimidating at this point speaks volumes. Meanwhile, the Dolphins’ roster features more big names than an EDC lineup and there may not be a player in the league more fun to watch than Josh Allen. In our opinion, this may be the best division in football heading into 2023 (more to come on that in an upcoming article 😉).

Rodgers is also inheriting a Jets’ team that went 2-4 in the division last year, which is honestly impressive given the fact that their Offense famously averaged production less than the average Cambodian penis length in a half against the Patriots (look it up, that’s not a joke). Needless to say, there is work to be done for New York, but it’s hard not to salivate at the idea of Rodgers dueling with the face of Madden ‘23 twice a year.

Winner: Bucs

Tompa Brady takes this one too as he clearly picked the least competitive division to join out of this group. Drew Brees may have owned him in the regular season, but by the postseason, this team exorcised its demons against the Saints, become a cohesive offensive unit, and gelled into a well-rounded football team that could consistently put up points while suffocating the opposing offense.

The Coaches

Bucs-Bruce Arians

Record before Brady: 56-39-1 for 58.9%

Rams-Sean McVay:

Record before Stafford: 43-21-0 for 67% with one conference title after resurrecting Goff who was inching towards that B word category (bust not bitch)

Broncos-Nathaniel Hackett: N/A (got his cherry popped in Dangeruss fashion on prom night)

Jets-Robert Saleh:

Record before Rodgers: 11-23 for 32.35%

At face value, Robert Saleh arguably presented the worst case for a prospective HC. Arians and McVay boasted far more impressive resumes to get the most out of their franchises’ facelift and Hackett was an unknown who had been given a lot of credit for Rodgers’ back to back MVP awards.

But as we’ve already mentioned, the kid Rodgers is replacing wasn’t exactly lighting up the scoreboard and Saleh is a Defensive guy. So how did his side of the ball look? 18.6 points per game allowed (2nd), 80.5 Average Passer Rating allowed (1st), 311.1 yards per game allowed (4th), and 1.8 opposing Touchdowns allowed per game (1st). Yeah, Saleh knows what he’s doing.

Winner: Rams

While Saleh’s Defense has been impressive and Arians did eventually take his team to the promise land, it’s hard to go anywhere else here than with a Head Coach who had actually been to a Super Bowl before getting his hand selected Quarterback.

The QBs

While the goal here is to evaluate which Quarterback walked into the best situation, it’s also important to look at who that Quarterback was at the time they made the jump to a new team if we really want to know how the latest chapter of this book is going to play out. It is the most important position in the game and not every signal caller is able to replicate who he was in the years before. So while the QB was on the prowl for a new team, said team needed to figure out if their dreams were coming true or if they were getting catfished.

Tom Brady:

Tom Brady had won as many Super Bowl Rings as any franchise in league history when the Bucs signed him in free agency. He was also coming off his lowest completion percentage (60.8) since 2013 and least touchdowns thrown (24) since 2006 while ending his tenure with the Patriots with a pick 6 to seal a One and Done exit in the Wild Card Round of the Playoffs.

At face value, this felt closer to Brett Favre with the Jets than Peyton Manning with the Broncos. And the first half of the season certainly leaned that way too. But Tom Fucking Brady did what Tom Fucking Brady does and figured it the fuck out all the way to an ass whooping against Patrick God Damn Mahomes in the mother fucking Super Bowl.

Matthew Stafford:

Matthew Stafford’s career felt like one that never lived up to its potential before Sean McVay came along. Yet in year 1 with McVay, Stafford tied the best completion percentage of his career and threw for the most yards since a man best known as Megatron graced the league with his presence.

Stafford was truly coming off a stellar season when the Rams pushed all their chips to the middle of the table. He had thrown for over 4,000 yards for the first time since 2017, maintained a completion percentage in the mid 60s, and did it all with a whopping 604 yards of rushing support from his top RB Adrian Peterson.

Russell Wilson:

Russell Wilson was a bigger disappointment than an Ocean Gate Undersea Voyage, Bill Cosby Cocktail, and Hunter Biden Combined. After swinging and missing in the draft for years, the Broncos finally said fuck it and went for the sure thing…..and still missed!

Rumors had been swirling about Wilson losing a step prior to arguably the worst trade in history taking place, but at age 33 it was easy to believe he still had plenty of football left in him. That being said, there were definitely red flags with his game. Down the stretch of the 2021 season, Wilson’s completion percentage dipped below 60 in 5 of his last 9 starts as he and the Seahawks crumbled to Pete Carroll’s first losing record in the Dangeruss era.

Many were quick to attribute that dip in production to Wilson rushing back from an injury sustained earlier in the season against the Rams, but in hindsight it seems there were far more fundamental flaws in his game that should have given the Broncos pause.

Aaron Rodgers:

This is where things get really interesting. Had the Jets acquired Rodgers a year sooner, there would be little to no reason to doubt his abilities. Rodgers won the league MVP award in back to back years for his 2020 & ‘21 campaigns. However in 2022, he lost his top weapon Davante Adams, threw for the most interceptions since his 2008 season, and was eliminated from postseason contention by the Detroit Lions team he had owned his entire career.

Make no mistake, this Packers’ offense featured several young players who were still shitting their pants in LaFleur’s system and there were several miscues that never would have happened in years prior. Yet, it’s disconcerting that Rodgers experienced such a downturn without Davante Adams, while Adams went on to have another All-Pro season his first year in Sin City.

Rodgers will also turn 40 this season (you heard it here first, get ready for the nauseating narratives that will result from this). Of the 15 Quarterbacks to start past age 40, 6 have a record above .500. Rodgers is inheriting a new team with a lot of promise, but he’s still inheriting a new team that hasn’t been there before.

Winner: The Bucs

While Tom Brady didn’t have the best stats of this group heading to his new team, he was far and away the most accomplished Free Agent by a fucking mile. Sure, questions persisted about how much of the success was Bill Belichik and how much was Brady, but no matter how you sliced it this was a Quarterback who had played in 9 Super Bowls and won 6 of them

The Verdict:

While it’s impossible to predict what the next season will bring (look no further than last offseason’s Russell Wilson takes), we can use history as a guide. The teams who made blockbuster QB trades and went on to win Super Bowls had either highly successful Head Coaches, less competitive divisions, or were inheriting a Quarterback with a wealth of experience of playing on the game’s biggest stage.

The other team on this list in the Broncos, did inherit a Quarterback who had played in multiple Super Bowls, but was joining a highly competitive division with an unproven Head Coach. While we wouldn’t rush to put Rodgers in the same category as Russell Wilson, the fact of the matter is his Jets don’t have a proven Head Coach (at least based on his record), play in an extremely competitive division featuring two playoff teams (one of which played in the AFC Championship two seasons ago), and are NOT inheriting a Quarterback who has played in multiple Super Bowls.

That’s right, for all Rodgers’ accolades and (well-deserved) praise, his last Super Bowl appearance was back in 2011, back when there were only five Fast & the Furious movies. Since winning his lone Super Bowl, Rodgers has gone 0-4 in the conference championship.

Between Rodgers’ lack of success on the big stage the last decade, his division, and his age, it’s hard to have Super Bowl expectations for him and his new team. But his recent back-to-back MVPs with Hackett give us hope that he will at least be better than 2022 Russ. With all that said, we’ll predict an 11-6 record with a spirited loss in the Divisional Round. But god dammit we’d love for that Ayuhasca-fueled legend to prove us wrong and get the Peyton Manning treatment before he leaves the league for good.

[thedurvin]

Ryan Seacrest is involved with pretty much everything mainstream that requires a host, so I think he’d be there if it was popular. Somebody would get disemboweled on live air and he’d puke, great for ratings

Probably some fight commentary from pro wrestlers, UFC fighters, NFL players

Same for classic action actors—Schwarzenegger, Van Damme, whichever ones are genuinely funny and charming. (IE probably not Stephen Segall)

Jackie Chan however I suspect would not endorse this type of violence, even in a world where it was treated as being just a step above Survivor and American Gladiators

I genuinely think there would be cross-pollination from other genres of reality competition and game shows. I don’t know which Drag Race queens would be down, and I bet some Great British Bake-off judge could be coaxed to help out on a Poison Your Enemies’ Dinner segment.

I know a fair number of right-wing men’s-rights guys would be all over this EXCEPT I want to have one episode where the contestants compete to assassinate whatever celebrity loses a viewer poll, and these guys HAVE to know how hated they are. Or maybe they don’t?

If contestants are being hunted you KNOW Ted Nugent would be there. Probably also one or more Duck Dynasty guys trying to claw back some fame

There would probably be some segment where comedians do commentary over fight footage a la Takeshi’s Castle, but who? It would probably be, like, David Cross and Patton Oswald, but I think it would be funnier to go to, say, James Acaster and Rob Beckett doing a parody of Guy Richie characters

If society suddenly decided it would be fun to have a real Hunger Games or Battle Royale or Running Man or whatever and it was largely accepted as a normal and fine thing to exist, what celebrities do y’all think would be involved in the presenting and commentary and that kind of thing?

[f1]

Alpine secure 200m backing from investors including Hollywood actor Ryan Reynolds

Alpine have secured a €200m cash injection from a group of investors, including Hollywood actor Ryan Reynolds, to support the French operation’s sporting ambitions in Formula 1. Alpine are currently fifth in the constructors’ championship – one place lower than they finished the last campaign – and have been searching for investment to help close the gap to F1’s leading teams. EXCLUSIVE: ‘There will be consequences’ – Furious Rossi demands Alpine improve fast after stuttering start to 2023 The Investor Group – formed of Otro Capital, RedBird Capital Partners and Maximum Effort Investments – have acquired a 24% stake in the F1 team, placing their value, say Alpine, at around €900m. The group have worked with NFL side Dallas Cowboys, America’s National Football League (NFL), French football club Toulouse FC and English football team Wrexham AFC. The Investor Group have acquired a 24% stake in the F1 team Reynolds bought Wrexham in November 2020 and, along with fellow actor and co-owner Rob McElhenney, has overseen the club's rejuvenation, which peaked with earning promotion back to the English Football League after 15 years. “Formula 1 and Alpine are strategic assets for Renault Group,” said Renault Group CEO Luca de Meo. “Over the past two years, we have re-ignited Alpine, capitalising on its iconic A110 sports coupe, boosting it by entering Formula 1, where it aims to become a championship contender. This partnership will accelerate Alpine F1 development by diversifying revenue drivers and increasing brand value.” BEYOND THE GRID: Laurent Rossi on Alpine’s title-winning hopes and what he learned from the Oscar Piastri saga Alpine CEO Laurent Rossi added: “This association is an important step to enhance our performance at all levels. First, Otro Capital, RedBird Capital Partners and Maximum Effort Investments, as international players with strong track record in the sports industry, will bring their recognised expertise to boost our media and marketing strategy, essential to support our sporting performance over the long term. “Second, the incremental revenue generated will in turn be reinvested in the team, in order to further accelerate our Mountain Climber plan, aimed at catching up with top teams in terms of state-of-the-art facilities and equipment.” Reynolds, right, is a co-owner of Wrexham AFC The investment centres around the F1 team only, with Renault’s engine division in Viry not part of the transaction and remaining entirely owned by the Renault Group. READ MORE: Behind the scenes with Pierre Gasly: The Alpine racer on football, fans and frustration in Spain and Monaco The news comes as part of a wider announcement from Alpine that sees them set a start of achieving €8 billion in revenue in 2030 and to break even in 2026. The Formula 1 team is only one side of the business, with the automotive arm looking to develop its own high-performance platform for its future 100% electric sports cars – which will see a seven-model range including one future roadster and the all-new A310. via Formula 1 News https://www.formula1.com

[maturemenoftvandfilms]

Is it weird that I’d do Rex Ryan all day everyday, but Rob Ryan not so much. I’m mean their twins. I should be having a party with either one of them. Maybe it’s the hair. Yes it’s the hair.