#Rhino freak

[pembrokewkorgi]

Sleepy Ink Blot

Blotto is having a rough morning.

Posted using PostyBirb

[m0nsterteeth]

Also, I find it funny that many other nonhumans yearn for the wilderness, but I actually feel perfectly in my element around people in a city. People are prey, directly or indirectly, so why wouldn’t I want to be where food is? Going out to stores on missions to find things is like hunting to me. Unfortunately, not proud of it, but I have kleptomania and am pretty indiscriminate about it so I can actually be harming someone innocent. I can be incredibly manipulative to someone by being pleasant and still victimize them. I am being predatory. It makes me feel bad that doing bad things is instinctual. I do not want to be a bad person, I want to have other avenues of feeling like/being a monster without being A Monster, if that makes sense. I want to be better, but it’s hard. Hopefully I can scratch that itch by getting better at shifting. That’s the plan.

It would be fun to be a cryptid style monster in a forest as an alternative, but one that appears closer to areas with people or areas frequented by people. Less Bigfoot more mothman. Haunting a small town or popular outdoor tourist destination sounds like a blast.

[soybeenss]

humanity’s biggest crime is letting the syr darya sturgeon go possibly extinct like that was literally the best one

[diagoose]

been on a twilight princess kick, have some sketches of an under-utilized villain <3

[chainsawworld]

Seriously where the fuck is he?? I can't just I can't I need him to sleep and I need to go to sleep I need to get him but it's like he's disappeared where the hell is he ??

[greeniegaes]

Screaming crying sobbing

Over a courtesan Shen Yuan.

Maybe he knew YQY and SJ when they were kids, maybe not. Either way SY ends up working at the warm red pavilion and ends up interacting with SJ

First it’s just small things, delivering tea for his jiejies, putting instruments back when they are done, dropping off various things.

Then he starts actually talking to SJ and SJ surprisingly doesn’t hate him just for being a guy (I’ve been thinking trans yuan here but also like cos yuan works, I this trans is funnier cause SJ is like ‘damn you CHOSE to be a man? L move bro’)

They start getting along more and more, working together on music SJ has to turn in for his peak, actually chatting comfortably, stuff like that. SJ realizes SY is an absolute monster freak and always tells him about the stuff he’s seen, long chats lounging on the same bed into the night.

Until one day YQY and LQG burst in.

SJ is instantly in protect mode, hissing and spitting at his sect siblings as SY groggily wakes up, watching them bicker. Eventually LQG says something along the lines of ‘well if you weren’t messing around we’d already be tracking down such and such beast’ to which SY perks up out of bed, quickly throwing on his clothes before anyone can so much as blink and is just

“Well let’s get going then.”

SJ quickly tries to stop the man, annoyed that his di would even entertain the thought of talking with LQG. SY though, does not give a fuck, throwing SJ a zither to use for musical cultivation, telling the jiejies bye and making them go out on their little adventure.

LQG and YQY are so confused, looking at this freaky little twink drooling over various things about monsters all the while SJ is giving them death glares and huffing.

YQY is extremely jealous watching SJ and this dude too, like bro! That’s his emotionally unavailable Shen! Get your own! He’s upset at how easily they get along, how SJ doesn’t care if his hand is pulled along or if SY tugs on him to whisper something. Anytime YQY had ever attempted such a thing SJ would pull or flinch away, making him stop

LQG meanwhile is just… confused. On one hand his moral code states that any courtesan isn’t a good person to be around. On the other hand this cute guy is getting excited over monster guts in a way he’s never seen before and it’s quiet fascinating to hear him do enough talking for the rest of the group.

I feel like eventually LQG and SJ are totally in love with SY and YQY is in love with SJ so they end up awkwardly paired together, all vying for another’s attention and stuff.

(If SY ever met airplane here he’d be so pissed by the way, chasing him around like a rhino and yelling about how he had to deal away with his pride (SY made the choice of going to the brothel, he doesn’t even do sex work though.) and the others just watch him like ‘wow, look at him acting so feral, kinda hot tbh)

[solxamber]

I wonder how would everyone in twst deal with shapeshifter!reader that shapeshifts according to the emotions they feel, kinda like penny from amazing world of gumball (mouse for fear, Medusa if they are angry, dragon when furious, etc.)

Shapeshifter! Reader shifts according to emotions

hi! thank you for the request, I'm not familiar with amazing world of gumball so if this is not what you wanted, you can let me know <3

Riddle Rosehearts

At first, he’s baffled by your transformations. When he catches you breaking a rule, and you suddenly shrink into a mouse out of fear, he goes redder than his own dorm’s color scheme. “This isn’t in the rule book!” he shouts, trying to keep a straight face while pointing at your tiny, squeaking form. "Get back here! I wasn’t that scary!"

Ace Trappola:

"This is hilarious!" Ace cackles when you transform into a chicken after a jump scare prank he pulls. "Every time you freak out, I’m gonna get free eggs!" He starts carrying around a list of emotions and their potential animal counterparts just to mess with you. He’s particularly fond of when you turn into something inconvenient at the worst moments.

Deuce Spade:

He panics when you become a snake after he accidentally insults you. "W-Wait, I didn’t mean to offend you! I swear I respect you!" Deuce waves his arms frantically, but the snake version of you doesn’t look impressed. Eventually, he ends up apologizing to a tree you slithered up, hoping for forgiveness.

Cater Diamond:

"Oh my Sevens, this is prime Magicam content!" Cater says, snapping pictures every time you transform. “You’re a walking meme factory!” He probably starts a hashtag dedicated to your transformations: #EmoshiftGoals. No matter the situation, he’s there to document your form, even if you’re a giant octopus stuck in a doorway.

Trey Clover:

Trey is unphased, which only makes it worse. "You’re a dragon, huh? Well, would you still like some pastries?" He offers you a cupcake while you’re snarling as a massive fire-breathing lizard. Somehow, his calm demeanor just makes you feel more ridiculous, and you shapeshift back out of sheer embarrassment.

Leona Kingscholar:

He’s absolutely done with it when you shapeshift into something large and ridiculous, like a lion that rivals him in size. "Seriously? That’s how you deal with anger?" he mutters, throwing an arm over his eyes and turning away. “You’re going to destroy the dorm, herbivore. Quit roaring at me before I kick you out.”

Ruggie Bucchi:

Ruggie sees dollar signs whenever you transform. “Yo, if you turn into a rare animal, I can sell tickets!” He’s already plotting ways to exploit your shapeshifting for his own gain, offering to “protect” you in exchange for some madols. You’re too busy struggling not to turn into a weasel from frustration.

Jack Howl:

He respects your ability, but he’s mildly concerned when you shift into a rhino after a workout, clearly overwhelmed by how sore you are. "Hey, I get the effort, but don’t take down the gym equipment with your horns," Jack warns, not knowing how to help while you smash everything in sight. It’s all part of “getting swole,” right?

Azul Ashengrotto:

He’s actually kind of jealous of your ability. When you transform into something like a Medusa during a heated negotiation, Azul’s glasses slip down his nose. “Let’s keep calm, shall we?” he says nervously, trying to maintain his cool. He starts drafting up a contract for your transformation abilities, hoping to exploit your forms to boost the Monstro Lounge’s appeal.

Jade Leech:

Fascinated. When you shift into a giant squid out of excitement for finding a rare mushroom with him, Jade’s eyes gleam with interest. “How intriguing... I wonder if your emotions could inspire even rarer forms.” He offers you “stimulating” experiences to study your shapeshifting, but he’s just looking for an excuse to see your dragon form again.

Floyd Leech:

He’s your biggest fan. Every time you shift into something, Floyd is there, demanding to “see the big one” — aka your dragon form. “Come on, let me fight ya while you’re a dragon! It’ll be fun!” You’d think being a massive fire-breathing lizard would scare him, but nope. He’s more excited.

Kalim Al-Asim:

Kalim finds your ability endlessly fun. “Whoa, you’re a parrot now! That’s amazing!” He just claps and laughs every time you transform, not even fazed when you accidentally turn into a giant elephant during a banquet. “This is the best party ever!” He starts planning parties around your emotions just to see what you turn into next.

Jamil Viper:

Jamil’s patience is tested when you shapeshift into an overly dramatic form every time you get slightly annoyed. You turn into a cobra when he criticizes your cooking, and he sighs, rubbing his temples. "I don’t have time to deal with this. Can’t you at least stay human for five minutes?" You hiss in reply.

Vil Schoenheit:

Vil’s irritation reaches an all-time high when he realizes you can shapeshift into ethereal, otherworldly beings, making even him feel average. The moment you turn into an angelic being, radiating beauty, he stares in stunned silence before murmuring, "I’m not envious... but perhaps you could tone it down? You’re stealing the spotlight."

Rook Hunt:

Obsessed. Rook is utterly captivated by your ability and considers it a masterpiece of emotional expression. "Magnifique!" he exclaims every time you transform, sketchbook in hand. He spends hours praising your forms in flowery French, even when you’re just a tiny bunny hiding in a corner from Vil’s glare.

Epel Felmier:

Epel is torn between awe and jealousy when you become a giant bear in a fit of anger. “Dang it, I wanna be that big!” He tries to rile you up just to see your more fearsome forms, hoping to get some tips on how to be more intimidating. When you become a giant stag beetle, he’s both inspired and a little scared.

Idia Shroud:

Idia’s both fascinated and terrified by your shapeshifting. “You’re basically a walking, talking MMORPG character with transformation hacks,” he mutters, eyes wide as you morph into a Cerberus when angry. He pulls out his tablet, muttering, "Okay, let’s not piss them off anymore, or it’s game over for me."

Ortho Shroud:

Ortho, on the other hand, is super excited about your ability. “Brother! They’ve turned into a griffin! How cool is that?” He scans you with his sensors and starts rattling off facts about your transformations like a walking encyclopedia. He keeps asking for data on each shift, even if you’re currently a three-headed dog chewing through a chair.

Malleus Draconia:

Malleus is unsurprisingly unfazed. “Ah, you’ve become a dragon,” he muses when you turn into a fearsome beast out of fury. "How... nostalgic." He gives you pointers on how to properly roar and fly, treating your transformation as a normal Tuesday. “Let me know if you’d like some pointers on being a more regal dragon.”

Lilia Vanrouge:

Lilia finds it hilarious when you shapeshift uncontrollably. "Ah, such youthful vigor!" he says, clapping as you morph into a bat out of anxiety. He starts comparing your forms to his own transformations, occasionally pranking you just to see what you’ll turn into. When you become a spider, he dangles from the ceiling, poking fun at your eight legs.

Sebek Zigvolt:

Sebek yells in disbelief whenever you turn into anything he deems less than “worthy.” “You turned into a sheep? Preposterous! That’s no form for someone in the presence of Lord Malleus!” But when you shift into a dragon, he practically throws himself at your feet. “At last! A proper transformation!”

Silver:

Silver just... naps through most of your transformations. You could be a raging tiger, and he’d probably sleep through it. When he wakes up and finds you in some new form, he just rubs his eyes and says, “Oh, you’re a phoenix now? That’s cool,” before falling asleep again.

Crowley: "This is a rare magical ability!" Crowley says, trying to use your talents to bolster the school's reputation. He wants you to shapeshift during big events, but every time you’re stressed, you turn into a giant tortoise and refuse to move. He’s not thrilled.

Trein: He lectures you on controlling your emotions to prevent transformations, but even he’s secretly amused when you turn into a kitten after falling asleep in his class. He just sighs and lets you nap on the desk.

Crewel: When you shift into a ferocious wolf during an argument, Crewel just nods approvingly. "Good, good. Use that tenacity!" He’s secretly proud of your feral forms but won’t admit it outright.

Vargas: “A shapeshifter, huh?” Vargas immediately makes you part of every athletic event, hoping you’ll turn into something big and fast. When you become a cheetah, he practically cheers. “That’s what I like to see! Speed and power! Keep it up!" He starts using your transformations as a benchmark for the rest of the class, causing you to shift into an armadillo out of sheer stress from his overenthusiasm.

Rollo Flamme:

Rollo: He tries to maintain his usual calm and collected demeanor, but every time you shapeshift into something bizarre like a raven when you’re feeling anxious around him, he gets increasingly frustrated. “This is not an excuse for chaos,” he mutters through gritted teeth. But when you morph into a seraphim in a fit of anger, glowing and majestic, Rollo's attitude shifts to discomfort mixed with awe. “We need... order, not divine intervention.”

Masterlist

[jinxs-gf]

The Human Spider

The Team x Spider!Reader

summary: you are this universe’s one and only spider-person.

warnings/content: set before the 1st episode of young justice s1, a few marvel references, this whole thing is from the perspective of the reader who’s basically Spider-Man so the writing is a bit silly…but I like it

word count: 2.1k

a/n: this is essentially an introduction to this world, I’m really hoping I can pop a couple fics within this little universe 😭🙏🏽 if not then…I’m sorry LMAO. only time will tell. ENJOY!!!

Life was good.

I mean, how could it not be? You got to fight side by side with some of Earth's greatest heroes. Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, Flash...oh and Black Canary and—

Yeah. It was great. Not to mention how incredibly easy it was for you to defeat the bad guys you'd fought. You definitely didn't have four near death experiences because of them!

Well you did, but they were completely your fault and not at the hands of a couple of phony villains. They happened before you got used to your powers and gone through extensive training.

It seemed like a curse at first, but now you take them with stride. Your super strength foreign as you'd broke nearly everything in your apartment (that hadn't been a fun thing to explain to your Aunt and Uncle when they came home to a trashed place). Sticky hands well...getting stuck to literally everything. The amount of money you spent replacing your clothes after accidentally ripping up your whole closet only trying to get ready for school...that was also not fun explaining to your guardians.

And the webs. Oh boy. You didn't want to think about it. The hole in your wrist that shot out webs like a proper spider freaked you out the most. You nearly turned yourself in to the government after that one. It was something that took the most mental work to control, the weird hole (yuck) closing up when you didn't need it.

The one thing you did appreciate immediately was the abs. Yeah, those were nice to wake up to one morning.

Today was just another day in your life. A simple mission happening in the middle of the city. Actually it was a pretty unusual mission, it wasn't the regular Ice Family or Joker cult you were fighting...but a Rhino. Seemingly a man in a Rhino cosplay. And his henchmen? Definitely not something you see everyday, but you have seen weirder.

Speaking of his henchmen...there was a lot of them. Enough to keep each member of the team occupied. They had insanely advanced weaponry, surprisingly keeping the fight going for a while.

You hadn't realized so many of the guys were on you now, all surrounding you and trying to shoot at you with guns that weren't spitting out regular bullets.

You look to your side and see your best friend (he doesn't think so but that's what you tell everyone so deal with it sucker). Speedy, Green Arrow's sidekick, Roy Harper under the mask, and Pain in the Ass (a nickname you'd affectionately given him) to you.

You were in a compromising position, one that you could easily get yourself out of. But now you've spotted an unoccupied Roy and you wanted to have a little fun admist the chaos.

"Hey pain in my ass! A little help here!" The men were now taking shots with their fists, all failing to land their hits of course. And your best friend had completely ignored you.

"Hellooooo you know I'm talking to you!"

"I told you I wouldn't answer when you called me that. And I thought I made myself very clear." Definitely referring to the embarrassing way he took you down in front of the team after harassing him all week with the nickname a month ago.

"Well you answered right now soo...."

An arrow suddenly flew right past you, nearly grazing your cheek. A couple more followed.

"Um hello?! You nearly took me out!"

"That's my way of saying cut it out while saving your ass. And don't your spidey senses detect that kind of stuff? Danger and threats? You should've seen them coming."

"Huh. Guess you aren't as threatening as you think you are. At least not with that silly little hat on."

He simply glared at you. He was definitely going to kick your ass later. (Again).

With your guys dealt with, you turned to watch as Flash and Kid Flash emptied out a school bus on the road. Well, watched was a strong word. The job was done before you could fully process what was happening.

And suddenly that same school bus was being throw your way by the Rhino-man. Directly above your head actually.

Uh oh.

CRASH!

This was the third time that's happened to you this week!

He had good aim, you'll admit. It landed on you perfectly, but thanks to your incredible strength he seemingly didn't know about (how could he not? You're literally the Spider-Person from tv! Spider-Person...pfft what a stupid name. No one seemed to come up with something better), the biggest indicator to this being his shocked face. Oh how you loved that look. You threw it right back at him. Jokes on Rhino-man, you also had incredible aim.

"It's gonna take a lot more than a school bus to take me out!" Although you could feel the nearly broken rib and bruises you'd need to get checked out before you went home today.

You sighed happily, dusting your hands, "light work to me. Maybe try one of those city buses next time? Might be heavier and more effective-"

The words barely left your mouth before a city bus was being throw at you, "Wait I didn't actually mean it!" You caught the bus this time. And although your senses knew the danger was coming, it was still a bus that caught you off guard with its weight. Your legs and arms quivered at the force of having to hold it up, you could feel every bruise spotted on your body with the strain and it was not fun. While your body healed faster than the average human, it definitely wasn't fast enough to recover from the previous hit.

The back of the bus was fully tipped to the sky. You prayed there was no one in this thing. And sure you were strong, but there was no way you could tip it back on its wheels without potentially hurting someone.

Luckily Superman helped you with that, seeing you struggle. He easily took it off your hands (show off) and maneuvered it so it was placed safely back on the road.

"Thanks Supes!" He gave a nod and his famous smile.

It was only a couple more minutes of fighting and cars being thrown around before the whole thing was wrapped up. The adults would give their words to the police and news reporters, blah blah blah...

While they did that, you and your best friends, the teens (the cooler ones) got together like you always did after a mission.

Superman is being interviewed by the infamous Lois Lane (the talk of the teen team, there was definitely tension there).

All while Wally stands a little behind them making faces and ridiculous poses for the camera. The rest of you stood out of shot either cackling or rolling your eyes.

Wally steps back, clearly offended. "What? All he's doing is flirting with her in front of a live audience. Remember what they said last time? No one's gonna be paying attention to me."

Robin snickers, "What? The whole 'no one can take Superman' 'but you sure can'?" He repeats their words in poorly done impressions.

"That was totally an innuendo!"

"Very mature KF."

"Hey! Robin and Spider laughed with me. And I saw Speedy’s smirk, he sat there trying to pretend he didn't find it funny. Maybe you should get that stick out of your ass, Aqualad?"

Roy, completely serious, replies, "Now that's no way to talk to the adults' favorite."

You perk up, "oh, me?"

Your friends immediately explode into disagreement, apparently in disbelief you'd think such a thing.

It was a simple story, how it all came to be. You got bit by a spider (totally cool about it).

Totally didn't scream your ass off because of it and stay paranoid the rest of the day, constantly thinking there was a creepy crawler on you...no. You found out the next day that you weren't actually paranoid—if you were in the first place, which you were not! Because apparently the spider had camped out in your clothes all day and night...

You totally didn't scream your ass off again that morning at the revelation.

You did scream at the sight of abs on your body that same morning though. And that's the only reason you'll ever thank the spider, forget the cool powers.

After that you thought it would be cool to use your powers for good, inspired by your uncle. You decided to have your own cool hero costume, symbol, and name (which you still haven't gotten. You originally thought of the Human Spider. People on the streets called it dumb, claiming they would not be calling you that). You had (unfortunately) been (TEMPORARILY!) named the Spider-Person. Which was insanely stupid and you needed to come up with something quick before it stuck completely. Maybe the Human Spider wasn't so good but it wasn't as bad as your unofficial name now!

Anyways, as for the cool hero costume. You had to use what you had at the time, which was...your normal clothes. Getting a costume online seemed cheap, and dressing up as an existing character in the media and saving people seemed wrong. It would only deny your identity as a hero. So you put on whatever clothes (mostly colorful pajamas) that you had, covered the bottom half of your face with a bandanna, and called it a night. And boy did that get you a lot of ridicule, but you got the job done, right? The only thing it didn't do was protect your body from scrapes and...stab wounds. You hated little knives.

You're not the smartest in the world and it's not like you had the money someone like Bruce Wayne could pull out of their ass and make cool superhero wear.

Once you were recruited by Batman, he gave you your own hero costume—no, suit. Every suggestion you made was followed. It was perfect. The mask had to be your favorite part though. Something you didn't suggest was the some type of magic on it, something called hammerspace. Basically you could have any type of hair, or ears...probably even a pair of headphones on your head and it won't show through. It'll seemingly disappear to this hammerspace (you weren't sure how it worked exactly, but it works nonetheless so you won't question it). The magic was done by a team member who was needed very rarely named Zatara. Another man with a silly hat on his head.

You attempted to try it with Batman to see if his bat ears would disappear (which was completely encouraged by Robin by the way. No- completely his idea!) He was not happy. (You got benched for a month...no patrols, no missions...and Robin got off scott-free! How was that fair?!)

Wally starts to bring up your part of the fight, specifically the bus incident.

"Hey isn't that the third time that's happened to you this week?"

You sigh, exasperated and playing it up, "yes."

Robin butts in before you could say anything more, "Couldn't you have caught them? Y'know with your spidey senses and incredible strength?" He has the nastiest smirk on his face. His smartass totally figured you out.

"Well yeah, duh. But it's fun seeing the looks on the bad guys' faces when they realize I'm not dead and I can carry a however many pound bus! Is that so bad?"

"No but it's embarrassing for us."

"What? What's that supposed to mean?"

"Yeah, our best friend who's powers include crazy senses that gives them insane reflexes? That best friend can't catch a big, yellow bus being thrown at them? Embarrassing." The one time Roy will take the claim as your best friend is when he's insulting you? Unsurprising.

Kaldur cut in, sensing your defense a mile away, "It is pretty shameful of you."

Your jaw dropped, even Kaldur of all of people was agreeing? Oh this is insane!

You point a figure at your friends, trying to get your threat across, "Well I find that incredibly offensive and you should all take that back before I-"

"Isn't the point of your powers to detect danger before it comes? How come that's the third time this week you've been hit by a school bus? It's embarrassing, Spider." Batman's monotone voice made his words all the more insulting. Your frown deepened.

You sigh, "Yup. Real embarrassing for me. I got that."

"No, embarrassing for me. I've got a reputation to keep up."

He walks away without another word.

"I can't tell if he was trying to joke around like you guys were, but I'm still offended."

"He was being dead serious. And for the record, so were we."

I wrote this before I wrote my Conner fic. I just realized I made Batman tease reader at the end of both fics…??

[beausbugbiome]

I’ve been rewatching ATLA and I always freak out during this episode for two reasons

1) poor Appa :(

And 2) GIANT BEETLES!!!

I love that they’re basically just Japanese rhino beetles but extremely large and green. What I wouldn’t give to have a beetle this large…

[exhaslo]

OMG HI I HOPE YOUR DAY WAS GOOD

i was thinking of a whole thing where miguel is constantly tortured by spiderwoman reader because yk his heightened senses he vould literally smell like her natural scent + perfume and it hinders his performance as spiderman so lets say like one day he’s at a breaking point and readee is just naturally a little bratty because its their personality but that day it was yk that horny week before the period so she like REEKED OF SEX bc she had some solo time before getting to the society so she goes to a mission or something and her perfume was just gone because she smelled like herself and she was teasing miguel, so like miguel decides to put her in her place by literally fucking them to submission and possibly score a date after

IDK JUST A THOUGHT OKK BYEEE HOPE THIS ISNT TOO MUCH

I love these feral like Miguel moments. Boy can freaking do so much more than the regular Spiderman that I just CRAVE for him to be real. Cries.

Warning: Minors DNI, Smut, feral Miguel, creampie, oral, size kink, rough sex, dirty talk

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was a mistake to bring you here.

You were a temptress, a tormentor to Miguel. Ever since he brought you to the Spider Society, you've done nothing but torture the poor man. You naturally smelled like sex. It was so intoxicating, especially since Miguel had heighten senses.

While everyone else treated you normal, Miguel couldn't help but have to avoid you. Your scent just brought out a side of him he wasn't sure he liked. A side that felt so animalistic. Miguel was worried that he had to run tests on himself due to his half Spider DNA.

"Miguel! You can't keep yourself locked in here forever! People will believe those vampire rumors." Peter yelled out. Miguel ignored him,

"I can and I will," He mumbled to himself.

"Bah! Oh! (Y/N), hey! Have I shown you my new pictures of-"

Miguel instantly froze the moment you entered his office. He tuned Peter out and groaned at the scent of you. This was difficult. You were even wearing a sweet perfume to try and cover your arousing scent, but Miguel could still smell it. He could still smell you.

"Miguel, I wanted to ask-"

"Whatever it is, fine." Miguel spat, clenching onto his work desk.

"But I didn't even-"

"Yes! Whatever it is, yes! Just...both of you, leave NOW!" Miguel hissed. Peter raised his hands up in defense,

"I think he's hangry."

"Mhm," You nodded in response and slowly left, "Well, thank you, Miguel. I'm looking forward to working with you on your next mission!" You said with a chirp.

Miguel immediately paled as he snapped his head towards where you had just left. His desperation for you leaving had just signed him up for a whole mission with you? Oh, there was no way he could survive. This sexual frustration he was having from you scent was not going to end well for him.

--------

"Geez, Miguel, even I could take down my Rhino faster than you arrived." You said with a snobby huff.

Miguel rolled his eyes as he approached you with a separate mask on. You raised a brow, wondering if he was sick, but before you could ask a portal was opened. Miguel activated his normal mask and jumped in ahead of you.

"Sooooo, are you like...sick or something?" You asked as you entered the new dimension.

"Sure,"

"Are you mad at me?"

"No."

"Then, can you say more than one word without yelling?" You grumbled, swinging in front of Miguel now.

"Watch your six."

Miguel was doing his best to avoid you. He even wore a second mask to try and block out your scent, but it wasn't working. This was painful. You didn't deserve this treatment from him. Miguel knew that, but what could he do? How could he tell you that your natural scent was making him horny?

"Miguel! Behind you!" You called out.

Miguel raised his head and tensed as you tackled him. His head right in between your breasts as the two of you landed against the fire escape outside a building. He cussed lowly, wishing that he had Spider Senses like the others.

"Are you okay? You seemed distracted today," You asked, placing your palm on his forehead, "No fever."

"I-I'm fine. Let's...get that anomaly." Miguel groaned.

Your scent was all over his mask now. Miguel couldn't breathe without inhaling you. Feeling his vision blur, Miguel almost reached out to grab you. He felt relieved as you quickly rushed towards the anomaly. Unable to stop his shaking body, Miguel tried to pull himself together.

"Lyla, I need to find a solution to this," Miguel hissed lowly, taking his mask off to breathe fresh air.

Lyla appeared before him, "I can think of one way." She hummed.

"Do it."

----------

Miguel was groaning in his office, threatening to do something inappropriate. You were nearly all over Miguel once you caught the anomaly, bugging him about how he was doing and whatnot. You were so clueless and annoying because you had no idea how good you smelled to him.

"So, Lyla told me that you got a problem. Said that I'm the only one who could help. Lucky me," You said with a wide grin.

A shiver ran down Miguel's spine the moment you walked in. Your scent was overwhelming! Not even your perfume could cover the fact of what you did. Feeling his vision blur again, Miguel tried not to breathe. Your arousal was stronger than before.

"You're only making it worse," Miguel groaned, leaning over his platform with sweat rolling down his forehead.

He needed you.

"Making it worse?! You're the one who went on a mission sick. Unbelievable."

"Leave....now," Miguel begged.

He wanted you.

"Lyla told me that I can help. So I'm here to help. I'm not leaving because you're in a bad mood."

"I'm telling you to leave for your fucking sake!" Miguel growled as he started to approach you, "I can't stop myself any longer if you continue to stay."

"Is that supposed to be a threat? I'm not sca-"

Miguel grabbed your arms, pushing you against the wall as he stole a kiss from you. Lifting you up, Miguel held you in place with his hips. Your scent was driving him crazy. His hands were roaming your body as your scent got stronger.

"(Y/N)"

You on the other hand, gasped in surprise. This was not the kind of problem you were expecting, but hell, you weren't going to deny it. Shit, everyone wanted a chance with Miguel, even you. Eyes widening as Miguel started to grinding against you, you whimpered lowly,

"So...any reason...why I'm your problem?"

"Your scent," Miguel hissed as he ripped apart your suit.

"Hey! I spent hours-"

"I'll buy you a new one! Just stop talking." Miguel lifted you up higher, your legs now wrapped around his head, "Your fucking scent drives me insane. I can smell you everywhere."

"Huh?!" You gasped and cried out as Miguel licked your cunt, "H-Hey, a-at least ask me out first!"

"You masturbated right before entering my office on purpose, didn't you?" Miguel swirled his tongue around your clit, listening to your moans, "Always torturing me."

"O-Oh~ R-Right t-there~" You gasped, attempting to arch your back, "Y-You were...ah~ mhm~ a-able to smell me?"

"You even taste as sweet as you smell,"

Miguel ignored your comments as he kept feasting. You gripped onto his hair, moaning and crying out as Miguel's tongue ravished your poor cunt. You gasped, shaking as you felt your orgasm fast approaching. Miguel only took this as a sign to go faster.

Circling his tongue inside your pussy, Miguel groaned, finally getting a taste of you. Finally shutting you up. He brought you to his desk, clearing it off and laying you down. Once you cam against his face, Miguel licked his lips as he pressed his cock against your folds.

"M-Miguel....wait..."

"After cumming like that? After coming in here so horny? I'm not waiting anymore, (Y/N)."

You arched your back, crying out as you felt Miguel's dick stretch your walls. You tried to reach for him, but Miguel just grabbed your hand and licked it in response. His pupils were blown and he looked like a starved man. You were not leaving this room the same way you came in.

"Fuck, look at you, taking me in so well. Such a slutty pussy just for me. You like having my fat cock inside you, huh?"

"D-Don't be...mhm...t-to mean," You whimpered, feeling his tip poke your cervix. Miguel just chuckled as he started to slap his hips inside you,

"Your body is telling me otherwise. A small little thing like you is the perfect accessory for my cock. Tell me that you've been wanting this. My cock pounding the life out of your cunt."

"I-I won't let you win this. Y-You've totally been...ah~ ah~ w-wanting, hah~ m-me." Your moans were getting louder as you tried to win this silly little competition with Miguel.

"Fuck, that's right. Cum against my cock. Let your pussy drip all over my desk."

"Hah~ Ah~ M-Mig...R-Right t-there! Mhm~" You cried out, reaching another orgasm. Miguel clenched his jaw as you tighten around his aching cock,

"Good girl. Finally behaving." Miguel was losing his cool, falling into lust, "Let me reward you, yea?"

"Mhm~"

You flung your head back, crying out and moaning as Miguel kept thrusting into you, not giving you a chance to rest. A shiver ran up your spine as his grip against your waist tighten while his thrusts grew rougher and faster.

Your eyes nearly rolled back as you felt a hot wave fill you. Unable to even think of what had happened, you kept your whines as Miguel kept his unresting pace.

"(Y/N), don't let other people smell you," Miguel whispered into your neck.

"Y-You're...mhm....ah~" You tried to argue, wanting to tell him that he was the only weirdo.

It was a lost cause to tell him anything that night.

---------

"Keep looking guilty," You huffed, glaring towards Miguel as he worked on a new suit for you, "Hours. I spent hours sewing that suit."

"And I gave you hours of pleasure."

"You gave me buckets load of cum and orgasms. I still can't feel my legs."

"Again, I apologize, it seems as if your scent taps into my other half of DNA. I understand if-"

"I want a date! I'm owed a date!" You said childishly, "Oh! And that suit you're making! I want both!"

"Such a brat."

"Huh?! Who's the one who couldn't hold it in??!"

"Who's the one who masturbated before entering my office?!" Miguel huffed, hovering over you again, "Don't make me shut you up again."

"Then that's two dates."

"Deal."

It ended up being three dates that he owed you.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I hope you enjoyed!!!

@tojishugetiddies

[deathmetalunicorn1]

I just we wanted to say that I love your content and everything that you do. It’s a joy to see your posts and read how you expand everyone’s posts.

I wanted to know if you were willing to write like One Piece x Beast Boy Reader. It would be funny to see how Strawhats interact with someone who can transform into any animal they see. Luffy, Ussop, and maybe Chopper would be so amazed and the most cheerful!

-When they first met you- they didn’t really know what do think of you, mainly due to your green skin. However, you and Luffy have very similar personalities, always cheerful and happy- he would instantly like you and demand you join his crew, without even knowing you or your abilities.

-You were polite, having good manners when Sanji and Nami yelled at their idiot captain for not even knowing who you were, just sitting there until they were finished.

-You beamed brightly, telling them your name before you stood back, “And as far as what I can do~~” you morphed into a goat, then a lion, then a turtle before turning back to yourself, “I can change into any animal!”

-Usopp, Chopper, and Luffy had sparkles for eyes, cheering loudly for you, telling you how cool your ability was, which made you beam brightly.

-Robin was curious, asking if it was a Devil Fruit ability and you shook your head, “No I’ve been able to do this for as long as I can remember- and I can swim since I can turn into aquatic animals!”

-Franky and Brook joined the other three, calling out different animals which you changed into easily, showing off which made them all cheer while Nami was shaking her head, a bit exasperated, but she could see the benefit of having someone like you as you could get into places easily, like looking for information.

-Sanji was quick to like you as you had table manners, especially compared to Luffy, and you always offered to help with the dishes, something he did appreciate.

-Zoro was a bit standoffish with you, not really knowing what to make of you, until he asked you to turn into a rhino and used you as a lifting weight, much to your surprise, but you were happy to help!

-Jinbei enjoyed your youthful personality, your joy- it was warming to him, and he enjoyed having someone he could go swimming with, at least without equipment and it was astounding to see how many animals you could turn into.

-You loved your crew, they didn’t treat you like a freak, like others in your life, who thought you were weird for your green skin, not knowing your story or why you were even like this- they made you feel like you belonged and that’s all that mattered to you!

[quitealotofsodapop]

I was going back through the posts, and can I just say that the scene where Jing becomes absolutely cowed via pregnant Wukong yelling is absolutely hilarious!! 🤣

Dude got humbled SO fast!

Ref.

Oh yes a favorite of mine! XD

I particularly like the idea of the "Jttw Stone Egged AU" where Wukong is rather open about his condition, and Macaque is just standing next to him like >:3

During the Rhino King arc; pretty much the whole army of Heaven gets their weapons and astras (+some dragons) stolen/absorbed by the Rhino King's Golden Jade Ring. Now all these immortal soldiers, including Li Jing and Nezha, are freaking tf out and in-fighting.

And Wukong just snaps.

He's been tackling foes left and right either on his own or at the lead of the charge. But all these "heavenly warriors" fall apart the second their swords and magic are forfeit!?

Wukong screams in General Li's face, boosted up by an intimidated Nezha.

Ans Li Jing knows better than to test the anger of a pregnant person! His ex-wife was in that state for three whole years and he quickly had to learn that there were battles not worth fighting.

Li Jing is still freaking out over his Pagoda getting taking away by the Rhino King - but he has to shake off his fear if he doesn't want to get yelled at again.

Macaque, holding the Ring: "Don't worry I got it." Li Jing, puzzled: "How?!" Macaque: "While all you duds were panicking about getting your weapons sucked away, I snuck into the cave using the shadows. Once Rhino King dropped his guard, I used my tendrils to bind his hands. He can't use the Ring if he can't hold it." The Entire Army of Heaven: "..." (O_O;) Li Jing: "I'll admit... I'm a little embarrassed at being outdone by a monkey in rags." Wukong, still furious: "HEY! That's my mate you're talking to! He's my equal in all things! Including strength!" (*grabs Macaque and starts aggressively nuzzling him to prove a point*) Macaque: (*pleasantly surprised blushing! Him and Wukong are still mending things at this point in the story. Begins smugly purring and nuzzling back*) (˵ ¬ᴗ¬˵) Nezha: "Ew" (*covers eyes as a little kid do*) The Entire Army Of Heaven, muttering amongst themselves: "What?" "How is that possible!?" "Is he the father to the Monkey King's child?" "Now that I recall, he does resemble a warrior who escaped capture during the War on Heaven." "He must be very powerful indeed if he escaped the fate dolled upon his brethren!" Macaque: (*smug purring gets even louder*)

Both the entire army of Heaven, multiple dragons, Lao Tzu, and the Pilgrims themselves; make sure to keep a cautious eye on the very person Wukong describes as "his equal in strength".

[immortalfan666]

MySpace Freak !!

My instagram:

@ lucilf3rrr

[goblin-enjoyer]

Normalize the tf2 mercs as being absolute genetic freaks of nature under the hood. Medic is crazy and we know he gets paid good so he’s probably got lots of bits in his bin if you know what I mean.

Pyro is straight up nonhuman. Pyro is a fire elemental that the Mann brothers have bound to a hazmat suit and medic made a real boy by giving them meat. Not making her a human body mind you, but rather every time he gets damaged, instead of bursting into flames meat forms around the wound and it bleeds instead of letting the inner crea tur out.how? Wizard. Moving on.

Soldier has massive lungs that make him 20% more louder. If he was smarter he could probably echolocate his way around. That or sound attacks idk he eats wizard pills he could have hollow bones for all I know. Sure he has hallow bones now for rocket jumping. Im the one typing I get to make nonsense on the fly.

Medic put pigeon dna in scout and that’s how he makes his trademark milk-like substance. How this happens you may ask? Scout saw medics doves have sex while getting his second Uber heart surgery and said “man I wish I could pick up chicks that well” and medic said “good idea I will help you with this” and then looked at the camera and smirked. The administrator does not spectate medics lab/operation room/dove breeding center anymore. Also scouts immune to radiation due to all the bonk he ingests, though sometimes he does become radioactive sometimes. 

We already know that demoman’s body creates alcohol and that he has a ghost eye, but did you know that if you shoot him with some sort of piercing explosive round he will combust into flames. I… I couldn’t really think of anything for demoman I don’t play him as much.

Engineer always wishes he could have kids, but doesn’t want to have sex. That and he removed most of his reproductive/unnecessary/extra/mid organs with machine parts like 30 years ago. So after the events of the games and comics where everyone is happy and junk, he teams up with medic to make himself some half robot half human half whatever dell conagher is at that point at time children. He asks if medic ever want kids he can do the same for him but he declines as at this point in time he has perfected the art of male impregnation.(on various ape parts) dell is a great father and yes I added this part because the whole humanized sentry thing that went around a while ago touched my heart because despite the words of almost every engineer main everywhere I get so attached to the sentries I build that I die a little bit inside every time I die and my buildings get sapped and I have to just watch as my babies get destroyed. I get too attached to my buildings to play engineer

Heavy doesn’t stop growing, similar to that of a reptile. His skin is as thick as a rhinos. He hibernates for a month in summer because I said so. He has accidentally killed/crushed medic before and is now eternally cautious when in bed with him. Medic doesn’t mind, he knows what he’s gotten himself into. Heavy can also talk to birds like a Disney princess. Medic didn’t add any bird parts for this to happen he just was always like this.

Sniper can dislocate every bone in his body and go through cracks that are at least the size of his head. He will use this to show up in the most unexpected places imaginable. Is legally classified as an tardigrade in some places due to his ability to be fine in almost any place (volcano,Arctic,sewer system, a walk in closet so large it took him 5 weeks to get out, space that one time). Can go up to a year without eating (the team found this out at the same time they figured out the space thing). Swallows things whole.

Spy can shift his flesh around to disguise as almost anything, keeps the mass and weight though. Breaths mostly through his skin so he doesn’t cough due to his decrepit lungs. Was hit by a car once. Doesn’t have anything to do with the subject matter of the tf2 mercs being freakish beings with human skin but I just wanted to include it here.

Medic. What isn’t medic? The only thing consistent with his biology is that he can regenerate somehow. He alters his body so much that it is roughly equivalent to 1 tyranid hive fleet and 2,million ork painboys.(the tf2 mercs would be more likely to work for the orks than to ever work for one of the human factions in 40k and I just needed to get that off my chest) This is how he manages to get away with all the things he’s done. Banned from this continent? Just become a new person who’s not banned from that continent and presto you’re good! The laws don’t account for the ship of Theseus!

[bytedykes]

one thing i noticed (and loved!!!!) in nimona is the different eye-shine shapes. specifically the way they changed as the story progressed, specifically focusing on ballister and ambrosius

[ID: screenshots of Ambrosius and Ballister speaking. They both have a similarly shaped, rhomboid, square diamond eye shine. /end ID]

in this first scene their eyeshines are a very similar square diamond shape. they still share it right after the part where ambrosius cuts ballister's arm off

[ID: screenshots of the two of them looking at each other, both still with a matching eyeshine shape. /end ID]

however immediately after, when ballister falls through the hole in the platform we get a brief shot of his face:

[ID: slightly blurry closeup of Ballister's face. His eye shines now seem more square. /end ID]

later we see ballister creating his new arm, and immediately after when nimona knocks on the door we see his eyes again, and the shines are completely square. not really any ambiguity to it, the tilt of them is entirely gone

[ID: closeup of Ballister's face, the eyeshines now square with the flat edge on the bottom. /end ID]

ballister isnt super consistent with this, but from here on his eyeshines remain mostly square. there are a few moments when they tilt again to resemble how they were in the first scene, eg. when he's telling nimona he's not a villain, and when she reminds him that ambrosius cut off his arm and he tells her its complicated, as well as more later that i wont get into now

[ID: screenshots of the above mentioned scenes, in both Ballister's eyeshines have a more oblong rhomboid vertically-oriented shape. /end ID]

BUT!!! a bit later, when he and nimona bump into ambrosius as they're breaking out of the castle,

[ID: screenshots of Ambrosius and Ballister looking at each other, both again with diamond shaped eyeshines. /end ID]

wow look at that they match again! ballister's are a bit more square and ambrosius's are more elongated, but again they have a very similar shape! however immediately after...

[ID: closeups of Ballister's face. In the first his eyeshines are square, in the second they are more diamond shaped. /end ID]

the first screenshot here is when he says "did you see the way he looked at me?" to nimona. the second is right after he says "he really thinks I killed the queen." by this point you probably can tell where i'm going with this post

also this is the part where i just now noticed nimona's upper earring on her left ear is a star hoop :) very neat

nimona snaps ballister out of his daze (square again), makes him promise he wont freak out (still square) and then he rides off on rhino-nimona (square). when he sees and almost runs over ambrosius in the hallway, the brief seconds he's looking at him, his eyeshines tilt again into a diamond. no screenshot of this one because it's hard to get the timing right on motion shots

when ballister wakes up back at the lair they're square again

[ID: screenshot of Bal in the lair, his eyeshines square. /end ID]

when he's looking at the photo wall (at ambrosius's photo specifically) i expected them to become diamonds again, but here they stay square! i am quickly realizing this post is mostly an excuse to stare closely at ballister's big baby seal eyes

[ID: screenshot of Ambrosius's photo, where his eyeshines are upright triangles. /end ID]

in the photo ambrosius's eyeshines are triangles which isn't a shape we've seen on him before. i dont think this really means anything though its just neat

skipping to the part where ambrosius says he'll be the one to hunt down ballister, his eyeshines are triangular here too, in person this time

[ID: closeup of Ambrosius's face. His eyeshines are triangular. /end ID]

during his declaration to "find ballister, and bring him to me" however his eyeshines are briefly diamond shaped again

[ID: Ambrosius looking down in sadness or resignation, with diamond eyeshines. /end ID]

back to bal. in the subway, both nimona's version of ballister and the real ballister have square eyeshines.

[ID: Nimona-as-Ballister with a pathetic expression, and the real Ballister with a disapproving one. Both have square eyeshines. /end ID]

in the next scene where the knights are looking at the subway footage, ambrosius's eyeshine shape has changed again:

[ID: closeups of Ambrosius's face. He has oblong reverse triangle eyeshines. /end ID]

they are now long triangles. my eyesight isnt awesome so the first time i watched this part i thought they were hearts :) but theyre triangles

i dont have it in me to rewatch the entire movie for this post so skipping to way later when ballister is trying to convince ambrosius the director is the one behind the queen's murder. the lines said are important here too

[ID: Ambrosius's face right before Ballister pulls out the phone with the video proof. Second image is Ballister's face after the phone is shot from his hand. Ambrosius has diamond eyeshines and Bal has square ones. /end ID]

the line bal is saying in that screenshot is "it doesn't matter. you shouldn't need proof. you know i'm not a murderer." then:

[ID: Ambrosius is pointing a sword at Ballister. Ballister's eyeshines are square, Ambrosius's are hard to see but resemble diamonds. /end ID]

AND THEN:

[ID: Ambrosius looking up at Nimona when she shoots into the air. His eyeshines are triangles. /end ID]

during their nacho meetup at the [checks notes] tavern? bar? nacho place? whatever. their eyeshines are square and triangle respectively

[ID: three consecutive shots of their conversation. Ballister has square eyeshines; then Ambrosius has triangular eyeshines; the last picture is of Ambrosius putting his hand over Ballister's prosthetic one. /end ID]

their shapes remain this way for a while until a key moment where ballister looks at nimona's rampage and realizes he fucked up BAD

[ID: closeup of Ballister's face, with distinctly diamond eyeshines. Behind him a fire rages. /end ID]

it's not clear in the screenshot but the fire in the background is ALSO diamond shaped which probably means nothing but again, is pretty neat

and then yeah basically from there their eyeshines stay the same shape to the end of the movie including the epilogue. i cant add any more images to this post though so i will have to stop here!!! just take my word for it. their (i say their but i really mean ballister's, because ambrosius doesn't get any more good eye shots after the beginning of the epilogue) stay their respective shape until the very end

"wow, nik, this post was beyond pointless" you might be thinking and yeah maybe!!! this may be all coincidence and i may be looking for things that are not even remotely there!!! but guess what i sat here for over an hour taking screenshots and putting this post together so by god i WILL see it to its end

my idea is that the changing eyeshine shapes represent their paths splitting and then coming back together again. at the beginning they have the same eyeshine shape; they're together, they understand each other, they think the same way. (this is a good time for me to note that the director's eyeshine shape is also a vertically oriented rhombus.)

then the betrayal happens. ballister kills the queen, ambrosius cuts of ballister's arm. they still have the same eyeshine shape here; but then ballister falls and ambrosius doesn't fall with him. this is where they separate - this is the betrayal

after making himself a prosthetic ballister's eyeshines are a different shape, more clearly now. he is apart from ambrosius, they're no longer a unit. however his eyeshines still appear as diamonds occasionally, namely in moments where he's with or thinking about ambrosius (or the institute, im mainly thinking of the "im not a villain" line when he's thinking i'm still a knight, i'm still good)

ambrosius's eyeshines are still the same diamond-like shape. when he and ballister see each other again they briefly share a shape again. it's not as similar anymore, and they're not the same as they were. there's still this rift of betrayal between them. but in that moment they're having, well, a moment

in the closet when he's thinking of ambrosius's betrayal (did you see the way he looked at me?) his eyeshines change between square and diamond

then cut to ambrosius, who's eyeshines are also a different shape now: when he's formalizing his betrayal to he and ballister's relationship, officially declaring that he will be the one to hunt him down. but there's a moment where his armor is being put on where he looks down with guilt and diamond shaped eyeshines

i dont even want to talk about the subway footage part because i still keep mistaking the long triangles for hearts which is killing me. killing me DEAD. if his eyeshines were really hearts when he was saying things like "something doesn't feel right, he hates freestyle jazz" i think i'd just explode or something. moving on

during the confrontation at the institute, before ballister tries to pull out the phone and is telling ambrosius he has proof, ambrosius's eyeshines are diamonds! just like in the beginning! i think here it's more representative of how he wants to believe ballister, despite the director whispering in his ear not to, how he badly wants for all of this to be a misunderstanding and for proof that ballister didn't betray the institute, didn't betray him. he doesn't want to lose his best friend (and more)

but ballister's eyeshines are square here- like he says a few seconds later, "you shouldn't need proof." he's being betrayed again, ambrosius doesn't believe in him after all. but even when pointing a sword at ballister he looks at him with diamond eyeshines. when nimona begins doing her thing his eyeshines are triangles again, like he and ballister are fully diverging paths again

you get the idea. their eyeshines are representing of their emotions about, and relationship with each other. so then why don't they go back to the diamond shape at the end of the movie? why are their eyeshines different even when it's clear that they've made up, they're happy now, things are different?

well i DO have an explanation for this. things are different now! they're no longer under the thumb of the institute (is this a good time to mention again that the director's eyeshines are also diamonds), a section of the wall is down, the kingdom is different! it's changing!

and so have they! the way i'm choosing to read into this, is that they're not the same people as they were at the beginning of the movie. they're not both brainwashed into thinking the same way, having the same ideology where cutting off your boyfriend's arm instead of disarming him isn't only justifiable, it's what's expected. now they're their own people, who aren't under constant pressure of a legacy or an institute. they've grown! and now it's okay that they don't think the exact same, because they love each other, and are now capable of loving each other like this

tldr this movie is great i love it here :)

obviously this might all just be a coincidence and im just overthinking it lol but whatever i spent this long reading into it i might as well hit post

edit: people have mentioned that ND retweeted stuff relating to this so it IS intentional! yayy i love being right

also for the love of god do not add undescribed images to this post. it takes like two seconds to describe a screenshot just use the same formula ive used for every single image here. please i can't keep doing this

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

Nimona headcanons plus a little bonus at the end

Whenever the trio gets home it's like a switch is flipped off inside their brains and all they want to do is be lazy and relax 

They’ve got very busy and stressful lives and a pretty small home so it’s not uncommon for them to yell when they’re asking a question instead of just getting up

And if they can’t hear each other they’ll just call the other person

One time Ambrosius was yelling asking them what wanted for dinner and was interrupted by Nimona calling him 

He answered the phone and all they said was “What’d you say I couldn't hear you” he didn’t even question it he just kept talking 

Nimona brings dead animals home 

I have this small headcanon that the first time she shifted into her human form was when she met Gloreth 

So before that she was living mostly as different animals and she kind of learned their ways and those ways stuck with her 

So there is a small part of her that sees Bal and Ambrosius as incompetent hunters (can you blame her)

The boys always thank her for her doing a good job and then they wait for her to leave the room before they freak out because MY GOD SHE BROUGHT A FUCKING DEAD RAT IN THE DAMN HOUSE 

There have also been times when she’s brought live animals inside the house the trio spent half an hour trying to get a traumatized bird out of their living room 

I just know for a fact that Bal has a crazy amount of brain damage 

This man has used his head as a weapon and has been hit on the head more times than I can count 

So I feel like he has a really hard time remembering the little details he gets really bad migraines and headaches pretty frequently his eyesight is absolute shit and he has to wear contacts or glasses and he gets really bad vertigo if he doesn’t take care of himself 

This worries the shit out of Ambrosius and Nimona but there isn't much they can do except deal with the symptoms when they show up

So I was thinking about the fact that as far as we know Nimona never told Bal about what went down with Gloreth

But I know that the boys would try and heal the damage that Gloreths legacy left behind  

And in the middle of everything Bal turned to Ambrosius and said “I just wish that fucking eyesore was gone” 

He didn’t have to ask what he meant he knew it was the statue 

So Ambrosius got to work trying to get it torn down 

A lot of people including some distant relatives that he hasn’t heard from in years tried to argue that it was an important monument and that her story touched a lot of people 

To which Ambrosius responded with “I’m her direct descendant if anyone gets to choose what happens to that statue it should be me” 

It was a couple of months into Nimona’s return when the demolition was approved 

The boys had asked him a while after he came back if it was something he wanted 

And all he said was “As long as I get to help” 

It was super therapeutic for both Nimona and Ambrosius 

Like don’t get me wrong the damage she did to Nimona is still there 

And Ambrosius will always have a complicated relationship with his lineage 

But tearing down the “fucking eyesore” heals something inside them

It was supposed to be a month-long process but Nimona and Ambrosius kept going and it was completely gone after two weeks

When all was said and done they collapsed on the couch and went through just about every single emotion you can go through

A little bonus I made my mama watch Nimona with me and here are some of my favorite comments: Mind you when I first put the movie on this woman was acting like I was pulling teeth

“I like the queen she seems nice” (and then she freaked out when she died)

“So they’re nice to him 'cause he’s gold I would just steal the armor what does he have without that?” “Money Mama” “Ah”

“Why are they so mean to him he’s just a baby?” (talking about Bal)

“She’s just like you especially with those freaky eyes” (when Nimona met Bal)

“Oh, so she’s the rhino…. Makes sense”

“Awe she’s cute I can't hate her” (about Nimona again)

“Oh wait she isn’t cute that’s freaky” (when Nimona was the demon baby)

“That’s like you and your sister” (Bal and Nimona interrogating the squire)

“Hey, mama is arm chopping a love language?” “I’m worried that you would even ask me that”

“Oh he’s got issues huh?” (after Ambrosius’ internal freak out)

“Can he die a little quieter… and faster” (after the Director stabbed “Ambrosius”)

“Oh fuck that little blond girl”

We had to pause the movie right before Nimona started her rampage because we were getting tired and I woke up to her in front of the tv with it pulled up on Netflix and she turned to me and said “Can we finish it already?”

“If she sacrificed herself I will never forgive you”

“Do you watch anything with straight people?” “Mama you literally ship them” “That's not an answer” (this is right after Bal and Ambrosius kissed)

“Is there a next part?..... so when’s the next one coming out?” 

Once the movie was over I told her some people thought Ambrosius and Bal were related and she looked me dead in the eyes and said

“You’re joking. No you have no be kidding… He literally said it in the movie!” “Said what Mama?” “oh I love him so much and I lost him whatever will I do” 

And then she kept making fun of Ambrosius for the next three minutes

I asked her who her favorite was and she said Nimona I go “aweee you love me” she looks me dead in my eyes and says “don’t make it awkward”