#Represssion

[deansawthetvglow]

represserverence

[matrixsunbird]

BJ the saint of big ass and repressed emotions

[selfshipping-haven]

Imagine trying to design a mean fearsome scary devilish character only for some random on the Internet to think it's absolutely stunning

[bojackhorsemanobviously]

Bojack looking fondly at herb its rather sim to how he first looked at wanda but his love for herb never actually died

It's the same look he gives diane

[thedogslegart]

Unfinished June art

[gregmarriage]

something about greg being gay and knowing he’s gay deep down this entire time, but he keeps retreating back into the closet, he dates comfrey and the contessa, but can’t actually feel anything for them. he thinks they’re pretty, sure, but he doesn’t actually feel anything in the way of romance, he’s just pretending. maybe he knows about his feelings for tom, maybe he doesn’t. he’s got a lot going on, so it’s debatable. i definitely feel he doesn’t know about tom’s feelings for him, though. he just knows he feels a lot for tom, but that’s just because they’re best friends, right?

[pebblestar]

I was so tempted to tell my therapist

'I am not mentally ill today but thanks!'

[jovialbasementbouquetblr]

2010 Liu Zhirong: Who Is Taking Our Money?

This interview, posted on the Aisixiang website in April 2023, was originally published on in the Morning Post Weekly, a weekly publication of the Xiaoxiang Morning Herald in Hunan Province. Another Chinese website, the abuluowang.com that also republished this interview, notes that the interview with Liu Zhirong actually took place way back in 2010 with interviewer Tan Jing:…

[bitterkarella]

Midnight Pals: Magic Systems

[at Unicorn Fuck Club] Brandon Sanderson: hey robert what kind of magic rules do you have Sanderson: in my fantasy world, there's 18 laws of magic Sanderson: sorted into 23 categories and 65 sub-directories Robert Jordan: huh Jordan: well in my world, girls do girl magic and boys do boy magic

Sanderson: wait what? Jordan: girls do girl magic and boys do boy magic Sanderson: how does that work Jordan: saidin is stored in the balls

Jordan: why, how does your magic work Sanderson: ah well if you experience an emotion in my fantasy world Sanderson: then a sprite representing that emotion with physically appear and dance around Jordan: is that like Big Mouth then Sanderson: what Jordan: its a cartoon show Sanderson:

Sanderson: oh idk maybe Sanderson: i haven't seen it Sanderson: i only watch saturday's warrior on loop Jordan: look, i just think it makes sense Jordan: that the fundamental mystery powers of the universe would bisect neatly along binary gender lines JK Rowling: goddamnit!!! Rowling: why didn't i think of that

Rowling: ugh, inssstead i only have magic dividing people into uebermensssches and untermensssches Rowling: it could have been sssso much more!

Rowling: sssso in my world Rowling: the sssuperior wizard raccce issss sssimply born knowing magic Sanderson: right, right Rowling: then they have to go to sssschool Rowling: you know, to learn Rowling: Rowling: magic Rowling: alssso there are bad wizardsss who want to exterminate non-wizardssss Rowling: the bad wizardsss represssent queer people now Rowling: that's why we need to get them before they get us Rowling: anyway if you're an elected repressentative writing eliminationalisssst lawsss, feel free to reference my fictional booksss for jussstification Tolkien: Martin: Rowling: i don't get it, that alwaysss getsss a big hand on mumsnet Diane Duane: in my world, anyone can learn magic Rowling: SHUT UP DUANE Duane: from a book Rowling: SHUT UP Duane: you can get it at the library John Bellairs: oh yeah i think i've seen that book

[autolenaphilia]

Edit: as hoshi9zoe pointed out, the original version of this post needlessly berated other transfems like Jennifer Coates, for which I do apologize, and I have toned it down in this edited version. The original version survives in reblogs.

Some months ago, I was searching through this transandrobro blog to see if they posted a callout of me, and i found this reblog, which I couldn't really write about for months, because what do I even write. I recently wayback machined it for posterity, and I guess this is my attempt to write a post about it.

It's saint-dyke himself, the coiner of transandrophobia, saying that the infamous (at least for me) article "I am a transwoman. I'm in the closet. I'm not coming out" is what made him coin the fucking word. It's literally bolded and underlined: "Reading this article is what made me coin “transandrophobia”.

The reason I put off writing this post is that reading that article makes me feel like i'm drinking poison. And it is poison, make no mistake, it's internalized transmisogyny brainworms dripping out of the writer's brain and onto the page.

It's a justification for why the author, known by pseudonym Jennifer Coates, doesn't want to transition, despite knowing she is a trans woman. And it's the exact kind of internalized transmisogyny that keeps trans women in repression and not transitioning. "I'm not going to pass, i'm forever going to be an ugly freak who will at best be humored by other women, the closet is uncomfortable but at least it's safe"

It's the same exact bullshit a lot of represssed trans women tell themselves because it's what society tells us about trans women, that we are freakish parodies of women, that we will never pass, and if we don't pass we have failed and are ugly freaks. It's all to scare us into staying in the closet and make others hate and fear us. Transmisogyny permeates our society, and the majority, maybe all transfems will absorb and internalize some of it.

Coates says that it all is just applicable to her, but again so many transfems believe this shit before transitioning and realizing it's a pack of lies. If this bullshit was in any way valid, a lot of trans women shouldn't transition, because before we actually transition many of us believe it word for word. And "it's only true for me" is how we justify it to ourselves. We tend to be way harsher on ourselves than others. This kind of self-hating transfem tends to think: "Other trans women are beautiful graceful goddesses, earthly manifestations of the divine feminine, always destined to be women, while I'm an ugly forever male ogre who just has a fetish."

It's all bullshit, it's poison, it's internalized transmisogyny.

And the rest of the article is bullshit too. It is not some insightful mediation on gender as some people say, it's the author confusing and mixing up actual transmisogyny with an imagined problem of misandry. She does this because she has gone full repression mode, and decided she has no other choice to live as a man, so her dysphoria and experiences of transmisogyny are actually men's problems.

It's a bad article, excusable because as Coatas points out, it's "essentially a diary entry." that was meant to be a way to "vent frustration" and she "did not intend for anyone else to actually read it." It is clearly not the product of a healthy mind.

I hope the author sometime in the past seven years eventually did transition, and that for whatever reason she didn't want to publicly repudiate her own article. Maybe she lost access to the medium account so she can't delete it.

Far worse than the article itself is the response to it. I've seen it passed around as some insightful commentary on gender by the "feminists are too mean to men, misandry is real" crowd. I have argued against this before. And other people have made insightful comments about it.

And learning that saint-dyke claiming that he was inspired to coin the word "transandrophobia" because of this article is the cherry on top of this shitcake of transmisogyny. For my thoughts on "transandrophobia" theory and how transmisogynistic it is, see here.

Of course, Saint-dyke absolutely could be bullshitting here. Claiming that Coates's article is what inspired him to coin the word might be a lie to claim that transandrophobia theory is not transmisogynistic because it came from listening to trans women.

This is why "listen to trans women" doesn't work. Because TME people will always choose a trans woman who confirms their prejudices. Blair White has made an entire career out of this. And Coates article is popular because it says that misandry is real and trans women's issues are partly caused by it, misgendering herself and other trans women.

And it's popular for another reason. Coates has thoroughly internalized transmisogyny, and thus her article presents a trans woman that is exactly as transmisogynistic patriarchal society wants her to be. She is suffering, but ultimately accepts her assigned role. She truly believes that her biological sex dooms her to forever be male. She literally "manages her dysphoria by means other than transition" as conversion therapy advocates want us to do. She never makes an social claim on womanhood by actually transitioning, so she doesn't invade the sacred women's spaces. Yet she performs the role of woman perfectly by serving men, by defending them from supposed feminist misandry. And she fulfils the ritualistic role that the rhetorical figure of "trans women" sometimes serves in progressive spaces, of giving a blessing to TME people's pre-existing views and actions, all while actual flesh-and-blood trans women are destroyed by those same deeply transmisogynistic spaces. This time it's a blessing for the same "misandry is real" soft-MRA bullshit that has infested the online left and created the transandrophobia crowd.

That is why this article and the positive response makes me sick, makes me feel like i'm drinking poison. This is what its fans want trans women to be like. I'm acutely aware this kind of self-denial is exactly what transmisogyny wants from me and tried to indoctrinate me into doing it. And I want none of it. I want to live, I want to be a woman.

[edwad]

can you expand on that last post? what exactly are you referring to and why is that a "memeified" vision of communism? what is that conception missing?

if communism for you is just the desirability of free stuff and not a specific politics of anti-capitalism, then you relate to it as a consumer that wants a society without limits. the russian revolution was largely animated by a violently represssed people who were sick of their children being sent to war to die in imperial rivalries that had nothing to do with them. their concern wasn't with "free shit", it was with freedom.

[cicadasmoth]

i am a whore for religious trauma & homosexually represssed alex and i don’t know why

like making alex have even more trauma cos i have trauma too is so healing

me after making my favorite characters suffer worse than canon…..

[cypionate60mg]

recently had to deal with some very hurtful comments being made about my gender and my body. at this point i've been an open trans man for years, but i've never really stopped being ashamed of that- if only in private. i want people to look at me and see a man, but some people never will. i want to be strong and self-confident, but i'm weak and neurotic. any words of guidance?

It actually takes strength to admit something hurt you. It's a skill, and some people think practicing it is succumbing to weakness. That's not true.

If somebody is targeting you with their comments, protect your safety first. In the moment, defending the idea of your existence is not more important than defending your actual physical existence.

And in the case that somebody isn't obviously targeting you with their transphobic remark, don't spend too much time thinking about their reasoning. And I mean you need to take a few deep breaths, actively stop the thought, and direct yourself to something else. Not represssively, but protectively. In all likelihood, that person probably goes through life with a fear that the status quo, which they've built their entire life and belief system on, is liable to collapse underneath their feet at any moment. So they defend it fiercely and automatically, not because they even really believe in it, but because the thought of building something better is too frightening for them.

This advice is not about absolving them of responsibility, it's about absolving yourself of the responsibility to understand them. Spending too much time ruminating on the rhetoric of transphobia can lead you to internalize it. Know what you need to know to spot it in the wild, and leave the rest to those who love to hate. Ideally, you can develop an improved and actually restorative version of the masculine classic "letting it roll off your back."

As for coming to terms with not passing all the time, I believe that having a vision for a utopic world can help us weather the conditions of this one. Not in an escapist way, but in a very practical sense. I want to build a different world and become the type of man necessary to accomplish that, rather than change the world to suit me and only me, or change myself to suit a world that could never love me regardless.

I hope that helps.

[ask-pentious]

Morning, my dears, and a Happy Birthday to me! Eggy fassshioned me up quite the cake, and Missss Emily put a sssingle candle on it to represssent my first birthday in Heaven. - 🎩🐍

Happy Birthday, Boss! -🥚#2

((And happy birthday me ✌🏻😎))

[sloanevictor]