#Reiki Healing Real

[serenityreikiclinic]

Breakfast stories..

[crystallilytarot]

Choose a dino! Your life purpose.

Pile 1

You probably had some bad experiences but you are able to overcome it. And after that you will be even stronger, and smarter in a way too. It can be that you will help someone who will have the same struggles as you. Sometimes you can feel hopeless and like you don't know what to do. But you will be able to choose or make decisions more easily, and also you will learn how to stand up for yourself and have boundaries. One of your life lesson is to find balance and harmony within yourself. Be in peace with yourself and with the world. You are probably very creative and you should practice your creativity more, express yourself freely. If you want to have a family, it will definitely happen. I think children and animals are drown to you. If you don't want children, than you will have some significant pets in your life too. You will have a happy and abundant family life. Whatever you wish for, a partner, children, pets, a garden...

Pile 2

There will be some new beginnings in your life, and even if you wanted it, it still can be hard at first. But you have all the ability to succeed. You should have more faith in yourself. You are smart. You are good at manifestation, some of you can have some psychic abilities too. Maybe you are a wanderer, an explorer, but it's not a bad thing, one day you will see clearly what your real purpose is. You will probably move a few times, travel a lot. If you want to go to a foreign country, it will definitely happen. Some of you can have a long distance relationship too. You should embrace your romantic nature and focus more on your inner child too. Have fun, be free, the world needs sensitive, joyful people too! You can have some unique ideas, unique lifestyle, and it's beautiful. Some of you can be some kind of healers too, not neccesseraly doctors, maybe reiki or just you have a healing presence and it will help someone when they really need it.

Pile 3

There will be some hard time in your life, and at that time you won't see that in the end of the day, it's better that it happened that way. Even if it's a betrayal, lie, loss of someone, everything will teach you something. And nothing last forever, hard times come to an end too. There's always a new day, a new beginning. You should accept changes. You will take time for soul searching, seeking answers, and you will have some inner wisdom. You are probably an old soul. You can overcome anything eventually, just have self-control, focus on what you want. You need to be open, be positive, don't give up hope. There's some divine timing and fate working in your life, but looking back you will see that actually you were lucky. You have a soulmate in this life, and that meeting will be something unexpected probably. Be confident, you will be a succesful person.

[booksandwitchery]

Demystifying Energy in Witchcraft

Throughout my life I've heard the word "energy" used, viewed and treated in the spiritual sphere as some ethereal, supernatural force. I even saw a TikTok the other day claiming that secular and atheist witches do not believe in energy work. I'm not sure where this treatment of the term "energy" started, but it likely has a lot to do with some more "woo" practices like Reiki and crystal healing.

I think we need to remove this stigma from the term "energy" in the Craft because 1) energy is an objectively real, observable material and 2) the benefits of working with and understanding energy shouldn't be packaged and branded as a medium for the "mystics only" club. This was something really meaningful that I took from Psychic Witch, where Mat Auryn explains energy in more scientifically observable terms.

Rather than defining energy as a mystical force, he explains that reality is, in fact, entirely composed of energy. The majority of us don't really think about reality this way, but anyone who has taken a physics class can tell you that this is a fact. Reality is energy--this is not a mystical perspective; it is a fact of the laws of physics. The scientific method has shown us that even things that appear solid, (diamonds, skeletons, my coffee mug, for example) are merely energies vibrating at a slower rate. Everything is made of particles perpetually in motion.

Still with me? Okay, so--Auryn breaks this down further by stating that the five senses are just various ways that we perceive energy. So in a sense, we are achieving a rudimentary form of energy work just by perceiving the world around us. Put in this context, many other animals are superior to humans with certain types of energy work (I wonder if this is part of why animals are so sacred to us witches). Dolphins and bats can legitimately use echolocation to experience sound waves as a form of sight. Indeed, we humans are far from the top of the totem pole when it comes to energy perception--it's almost as if humans were not created to rule over the rest of the earth (such a crazy concept).

Some examples of energy that our bodies cannot perceive include magnetic fields, radiation, wireless signals, and ultraviolet light.

What I'm trying to say is that Auryn's book really helped me to think of energy in terms of empirical reality, and reinforced my (somewhat) recent realization that magick is a valid, observably effective tool that can be used to achieve the changes we want.

[hazelence]

@emil162 May I present:

Cure Haunter is the forth cure in Yūrei Attack! 👻 Pretty Cure. She is an alter ego of Kaidan Reiki, a first year middle school student at the Oujia Boarding School in Gōsutotaun.

Cure Haunter is the ghost saving cure of compassion and wisdom and represents purple coloured mantra.

Her catchphrases are: "Putting the spook in your step! Cure Haunter!" and "Not a ghost of a chance!".

She is a bookworm, who loves to spend time learning new things and sharing her discoveries with others. Her favourite thing to learn about are ghosts and ghosts stories, and when she learns they're real she makes it her mission to learn all she can about them!

Cure Haunter's individual attack - Spirit Flare

When performing this attack Cure Haunter starts with the words "Time to step out of the shadows! Spirit Flare!" and shoots a ball of burning energy towards the enemy, it explodes on contact in the shape of a ghost. After purifying the soul she whispers "May you rest forever in our hearts".

Reiki: is a japanese form of energy healing.

Kaidan: taken from the japanese word for 'ghost story'.

[beesmygod]

Don’t know how much info/experience you have about this but is chiropractic medicine bullshit or real. I like listening to chiro vids for asmr but the youtube chiro people seem especially sketchy (they make youtube vids of women in yoga pants for clout of course they are lol)

total and absolute bullshit. if you want to scream, look up lawsuits and see how easy it is for one of these quacks to paralyze or otherwise maim you. the guy who invented chiropractic was completely batshit insane and believed in like. the healing power of magnets and was anti-vaccine back they first came out lol.

oh right. also he claimed that a ghost taught him how to do chiropractic.

As an active spiritist, D. D. Palmer said he "received chiropractic from the other world"[17] from a deceased medical physician named Dr. Jim Atkinson.[18]

everyone locally hated him so much that when his son struck him with his car during a parade no one cared.

anyway i understand the asmr aspect of the vids tho lol. i used to look up all kinds of reiki healing bullshit bc they have v regular soothing breathing. im easy to impress i guess lol

[etherealdiva]

Hello 💕

Can you make a post (like lists) on what spiritual careers suit you according to your MC?

Thank you! 💕

Hi hi!

Mmm just spiritual careers? Alright let’s see what I got. This isn’t based on actual facts or anything, I’m just gonna say what comes to mind!

Aries MC- I picture a shaman for some weird reason. Or a nurse specifically for the army then I can see it. Personal trainer, or MMA fighter who uses spirituality in their training. Or a consultant specializing in helping spiritual businesses to make sure they succeed in their businesses with commerce, clients, products, etc. like the person would check out and study the competition.

Taurus MC- herbalist or an integrative nutritionist. Focused solely on holistic nutrition. You can probably “heal” through your cooking and maybe share recipes online or YT. They also do cooking classes and have their students say affirmations while they’re cooking. Can be an astrologer for real estate and for financial consultants or that’s your specialty in astrology.

Gemini MC- an author on spiritual practices that you personally experienced by traveling other countries and meeting other spiritualists. Or an energy healer with a strong emphasis on being to communicate and write out your thoughts to co-create your desires and unblock your limiting beliefs and words. Or have a podcast on spirituality and/or astrology.

Cancer MC- I def picture a nurse for this! A pranic healer! A family therapist who helps with family trauma.

Leo MC- a confidence coach. One who specializes in unblocking the solar and sacral chakra. A performer who teaches their students to tap into their inner star.

Virgo MC- a holistic health coach, animal healer, nurse, or a personal trainer who incorporates meditation, yoga, nutrition (certified!) and energy healing. Medical astrology!!

Libra MC- a reiki healer who also is an esthetician. Like a beauty witch who does your lashes, body sculpting, hair, nails, etc.

Scorpio MC- shadow worker coach or a psychologist who incorporates astrology and holistic health in their practice. Sex therapist who also does energy healing. A psychic/ medium as well…obviously.

Sagittarius MC- A life coach! A manifestation coach. Motivational speaker who does breath work with their audience.

Capricorn MC- a business coach/consultant who incorporates astrology into their practice so they can help their clients based on their chart to get work or start their business.

Aquarius MC- IT person, inventor or a teacher/coach who helps people to tap into their intellectual side AND their intuitive side to make solid decisions but that also aligns with their heart. A group therapist or someone who does meet ups to discuss esoteric topics and does workshops.

Pisces MC- musician or an energy healer using sound bowls. Think of Jhene Aiko! Tarot/oracle card reader and spiritual coach. A psychic and medium as well.

Hope this helps! These were random and the downloads that came to me! Haha ❤️

[creature-wizard]

How easy is it to stumble into far right content on YouTube?

The answer is, extremely easy.

A few minutes ago I loaded YouTube in a private browsing window, so I had no cookies or history to influence what I was shown.

Scrolling down a little on the front page, I find a video containing "Reiki Music."

I click this video, and you can see a bunch of similar content to the right:

Clicking one of those links, and we get more content like this:

Okay, now let's go back to the homepage and see what we've got now. "Alpha Waves Heal Damage In The Body In 4 Minutes," you say? Hmm... in this economy and healthcare system... it's awfully tempting, isn't it? Surely it wouldn't hurt to at least... try?

*click*

Siiiiiiigh. Unfortunately, it didn't do anything for me. Well, let's go back to YouTube's homepage, maybe there's something good. What's this? HIDDEN KNOWLEDGE? The Real LAW OF ATTRACTION? Hmm, sounds interesting, what is it?

...And here it is, it's antisemitism being sold as self-empowerment:

Far right conspiracy theories were literally just six clicks away from YouTube's default front page. Literally just six clicks. Six clicks was all it took to get me from what's ostensibly "normie space" and into the territory of the far right.

[viviennelamb]

What do you think of astrology and energy healing practices like reiki? Love your blog btw. I don’t use tumblr anymore but I check your page every week. You’re great!

Thanks for reading, I'm glad you can get something out of my observations!!

Astrology groups people based on their date of birth to predict their interests, creating a mindset focused on "destiny." Astrology has the same premise as the MBTI and Enneagram and is only applicable to egotistical people. Astrology became public knowledge because people will subconsciously arrange themselves to fit into a label they think makes them “good” to garner a false sense of belonging. I have only read about my own zodiac, but it appeared to be a lust and consumerist forecast more than it was about "me." Personality typing is not about the individual Soul; it's yet another way to obtain the individual's ever-important attention. People who lack a sense of self take Astrology (and the like) very seriously, yet it provides no tangible value other than a temporary ego boost.

Those who understand what the Soul is do not see the supposed value in Astrology because the Soul has no birth or death date, so it is not applicable to those of Christ Consciousness or higher. Soul and Spirit are expressed in an infinite amount of ways, so it's more accurate to say Astrology is the study of the Ego because the False Self is predictable once you know what you're looking at - no need to study the stars, planets or time which are all false projections based on what the egotist's physical eyes perceive. When someone achieves Cosmic Consciousness, they gain control over their environment and awaken the all-seeing power of the Soul. She becomes aware of what she was all along: the Present Moment (and not a "past birthdate").

With Reiki, healing is 100% dependent on the thoughts of the practitioner. Body healing does work, but it depends on the consciousness of both parties. Someone with a purely destructive ego can be "healed" by someone who is materialistic like them, but less harmful. For example, a granola mom who is involved in the material world but practices mindfulness once a week if her husband and kids give her 10 minutes of solitude and silence. If this mother was a Reiki healer, she could bring the obligate narcissist to her level, but not past that.

Reiki may not have an effect on beings of higher consciousness as only a divine being, like God, possesses the power to heal them – the embodiment of purest purity. The effects of being healed do not last if the individual engages in the activity that got them sick. Ultimately, the individual must learn their karmic lesson, and heal themselves instead of relying on people who don't have the time or discipline to become a true healer and therefore do not know anything.

If you know anybody who's pure in thought, you feel at peace around them because they're the real healers. You don't need to meet a healer in person either, just perceiving their vibration whether it is in written, spoken or quiet in-person presence will be enough to incite positive change in the perceiver. This is why most people feel at ease around young children who haven't developed an ego yet. A child with an ego is highly disturbing, and this doesn't change when they turn 18... it's still disturbing.

As a child, my mother would come into my room and sit next to me for a few minutes and say, "Your room is so light, I feel better being in here." When I became a teenager, she said my room felt heavy and I felt hostile. My ego became so strong during high school that I couldn't sleep in my own room anymore. I had to move to the basement, but the same thing happened there too. I carried a black cloud of strife with me everywhere I went because my mind was caked with filth I didn't know how to detox. This went on to give me a lot of symptoms I won't get into, but nothing helped. False healers (including doctors, chiropractors, dietitians, coaches, therapists, dermatologists...) can only do so much (i.e. nothing). The "power of the mind" doesn't mean anything when the average person's mind is like an extreme hoarder's home and her prana is like an old phone battery that can only hold 20% of its charge.

An individual who engages in the lust thought or act cannot heal themselves or others which is why those seeking Reiki services need to know about the practitioner's personal life. A lot of them do drugs and participate in tantric orgies then clock into their clinics a few hours later on demon time with zero prana. Being a healer is a job that demands self-mastery as their thoughts can affect the quality of their work. This path is more difficult than being a surgeon where doctors can laugh in disgust over the patient's exposed organs or any other "difficult" job where people have coworkers helping them, vacations and a retirement plan. A certification isn't enough in this case; they need to be put under strict surveillance for five years to confirm that they are a healer.

The reason why Reiki is considered "dark" is because the unilluminated are drawn to "shortcuts" that are a waste of time (same with witchcraft and anything else like it). But what is also dark is to "just believe in Jesus and be saved" when it takes constant work to become and remain pure of mind. Cleansing the mind through scientific meditation will heal the steadfast meditator. There's no shortcut to Health or Wisdom; everybody must become disciplined, consistent and embody true love.

[cosmichighpriestess]

2023 the Year of Chaos

Beginning today we stop overextending ourselves. We stop giving to situations and people that don't appreciate us. We become focused only on ourselves and our happiness and becoming the best versions of ourselves for ourselves-- for the collective. We are releasing the weight of the world off of our shoulders. Your higher vibration is the most needed at this time. Your vibration impacts the entire collective consciousness.

You need not focus on anything else, except your daily responsibilities. Because your vibration will have the biggest impact on the world--not your intellect, not your abilities, not your money, not your self sacrifice will have the biggest impact. Only your vibration will. We must remember that we cannot control temporary circumstances outside of ourselves but we can control ourselves, how we react and how we shift, how we want to create or manifest the future. In my 2023 forecast I said, that 2023 was going to be very chaotic but this does not mean you need to fear anything.

This is when the real New Year begins. You are going to see many confused, disillusioned people, brainwashed by the "dark forces", acting out of ego, waking up from the darkness coming to light. Mass awakenings. You can rely on the energy healers, spiritual lightworkers, witches, the new age spiritualists, the master manifesters, the light holders, the light warriors, astrologers, reiki masters, the monks, the shamans, the magicians, the seers, Earth Angels, psychics, the changemakers, the chosen ones, empaths, the enlightened ones ect. Any label you want to give us, we're all healers in different slices of personalities and ways and we're all connected whether you like it or not. Anyone that gives you a cool calm and collected vibe, is an obvious master, stable and grounded that seems to be confident that everything is going to be okay. They are the ones you can turn to and rely on when everything looks chaotic. Your energy of fear, pain, anxiety, unworthiness, scarcity, and victim mentality is creating blockages in your energy flow. The trauma, from your intense emotions that you cannot process gets stuck in different chakras, waiting to be released.

They will teach you how to break toxic cycles and patterns you've been stuck in. They are going to be teaching in chaos, being the eye in the storm. Pluto will help you break free from those toxic cycles that literally kept you in hell. Please do, and I highly recommend getting a psychic reading this year so that you can do some past life healing trauma,shadow work and advice on your next moves, or connecting with a loved one you've been avoiding. Pluto aka Hades, Pluto is moving back into Aquarius after 225 years. Society as a whole is going to change forever. Aquarius energy is out of the box and inventive. You are going to see more riots, more protests, more inventions and change, more angry change is needed, and Pluto is all about death and rebirth. So embrace the chaos, remember to keep a balanced steady routine daily, so your routine doesn't change, you stay the eye in the storm unbothered by the chaos around you and remember you create your reality as the God or Goddess of your entire Universe, because remember you are the entire Universe experiencing itself.

Remember the chaos creates positive change, it is for your benefit so relax, focus on what you want to create. You create the unknown from the now so there's nothing to fear if you create the unknown. Remember to not take any fear or anxiety as personally yours, release your burdens, give your problems to the Universe/God/Source to handle for you and enjoy your life because it's meant to be enjoyed especially if you've already suffered enough, ecstacy is yours for the taking. Be kind to yourself, your past self and future self are all doing the best they can. Get as much rest as you can. Welcome to the second coming. It is safe for your light to be seen. Relax, and breathe through the waves of the storm. Let your light guide your sight.

[skaldish]

aspen-aura

You're so lucky, honestly. I fell prey to a spiritual and "other kin" predator when I was 16, and didn't find my way out til I was 26. It did incredible damage to my image of myself, my gods, and the world at large. Here's to fucking up and getting wiser 🍻

Gods I'm so sorry. I hope you've found healing and greener pastures now.

This stuff is real. I've heard stories of girls getting kidnapped because they met up with someone thinking they could be turned into a vampire. I personally know people who were straight-up trafficked by predators claiming to be spiritual leaders. I've even had the experience of a reiki healer trying to coerce me into her weird little lifestyle cult with promises of manifesting my latent power.

People prey on other people's desire for significance and on their ignorance. It's sick. It's common. It's the driving force behind white nationalist recruitment.

It's why I'm always repeating the same messages of agency, questioning authority, and entertaining ideas without accepting them. These things can actually save your life and preserve your sanity.

I did get lucky, and in light of everything going on I want to make the knowledge I gained and honed as accessible as I can make it.

[komal09]

[kayleightarot]

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Welcome to Woo Wednesday, and March, folx! This week is all about loving, healing, hopeful, energy. New cycles, a new month, and new alignments are starting. It's a great time for being positive (the real kind; with hope, not toxicity), and balanced, as you make decisions on moving forward for your highest good. Today, I offer Reiki to assist you in finding that perfect for you, place to start, in healing, love, and hope. Gus an ath thuras (Until next time), Lovelies   Namasté

[sidewalkchemistry]

Announcing....Sidewalk Chemistry's Fall Challenge for Holistic Health:

The Emotional Healing Intensive Program

(running October 23rd to November 23rd, 2022 - 32 days of deep emotional healing)

Learn to become an emotional alchemist, overcome stuck traumas and limiting beliefs, sit through your emotions, and understand what your emotions are trying to communicate to you.

Tools Used: herbalism, breathwork, mindfulness, meditation, flower essences, Reiki, shadow work, somatic experiencing, and anything else you see fit

OUR STRUGGLES REVEAL TO US EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE ABLE TO GROW

The lessons are free to the public for the duration of this period...so that we can start emotionally healing and becoming more emotionally wise just in time for the holidays.

~ See under the cut for the program outline ~

Introduction: What is Emotional Healing?

Herbs for Emotional Healing

Additional Tools for Emotional Healing

Lesson 1: Deep Listening

Lesson 2: The Labyrinths of Imagination

Lesson 3: The Body Keeps the Score and the Portal Too (All the Answers are Inside You and The Portal to the Higher Self)

Lesson 4: E-nergetic MOTIONS of Individual Energetic Beings

Lesson 5: Infinite Intelligence = Inner Voice (How to Meditate) (Inspiration & Joy)

Lesson 6: It's All in My Mind?(How the Mind is Able to Help or Hurt You)

Lesson 7: Absolutely Unmixed Attention (Interconnected Experiences of Healing)

Lesson 8: Forgiveness is the Path to Freedom (The Real Reason Why You Really Should Always Forgive)

Lesson 9/10: Emotions x Breathwork 101

Lesson 11: Co/Counter/Inter-Dependence & Learning Healthy Boundaries

Lesson 12: The Power in Suffering (Why is Unhappiness Valuable?)

Lesson 13/14: The Power of Presence (Navigating the Mind)

Lesson 15: Feel the Fear (Irrationality vs Rationality of Fear)

Lesson 16: This is Emotional Alchemy (The Stories We Tell Ourselves)

Lesson 17: The Body As A Map

Lesson 18: Identifying Blind Spots

Lesson 19-22: Plants as Healers (Flower Essences, Aromatherapy, and Herbs)

Lesson 23-24: Body-Mind Connection (The Shelf as a Healer)

Lesson 25-26: Being Is Becoming (The Tree of Life)

Lesson 27: The State of Your Inner Child

Lesson 28: The State of Your Relationships

Lesson 29

Lesson 30

Lesson 31

Lesson 32

[apteryxdrake]

Name meaning tag game

Stolen from @catchingbigfish because I don't yet know enough authors to be tagged very often.

Rules: list your OCs and explain their name meanings

Most of my character names are actually names that come from the constructed language I created. So it's bound to be wordy. Also these are the main characters for the first four books of the series.

Dobid - comes from the word dobeda, which means ghost/immortal/books (it literally translates as "that which is unrestrained from time", there's also an element of separation from the community, so it infers things like ghosts and gouls because they're not "us".

Jaola - canonically her name comes from Ja'Jo'La, or Ya'yola, which essentially means "ender of life", which suits her in one way because she was trained/brainwashed to become an assassin and she's very good at it, even if she hates it. In real life, I created her character in my tweens, and at that point I was taking names from real life and mashing them up, her name originally came from Julia. I don't know off the top of my head what Julia means, but the conlang meaning of her name is more appropriate anyway.

Jessal - another mashed real name, I have a cousin called Jessie, she had a crappy childhood too so I borrowed her name and put it into my story as a tween, then changed it to Jessal when I was 19. In the conlang it would come from "Ye Sala", which, from the story mythology is the name of a famous prince who lead his people out of a famine.

Asha - Comes from Ashaana, which means goddess. The context is that her grandmother, who is called Ashaana, is very powerful in her homeland and when she eventually dies, she doesn't reincarnate again, she becomes a Time Guardian, which is a sort of deity. Asha, the granddaughter, is more in line with the older version of the name which describes the divine feminine, which is a powerful, strong warrior. So her name means "formidable warrior", and she totally is kick ass.

Taelin - comes from the older name Taelanei. Taelanei is a nobleman's name, it translates from the conlang as "a world of life and magic/spirit", in a less literal translation, Taelanei would be the conlang name of the Kingdom of the Fae or Fairyland or whatever else folks call it. So in Taelin's version, his name basically means that he has a whole world on the inside of him, waiting to come out.

Nalana - another conlang name, which means "the embodiment of life". She's a healer (kind of like Reiki but strong enough to heal a bullet out of a body), and the energy used as a healer is lifeforce, so, basically her name means "healer".

Nama - the oldest form of his name is Namaan/Ngamaan. As a word it basically means a person who is very present in their body and in the world. But when I first started making the conlang (and before I named the character), I created myths and stories to give colour and references for the conlang. So, there was a general called Ngamaan, the nobleperson he worked for was corrupt. And after an inciting incident where the noble killed a bunch of civilians for a really selfish reason, Ngamaan lead the armies into a coup. He killed the corrupt noble, became the steward of the kingdom, adopted the nobleperson's heir, brought them up to be a good leader and when they came of age, he surrendered the title of steward and the heir became the king/queen/whatever. So while the name means one thing linguistically, the story infers the name means the kind of person who would have this sort of honour and dedication. Which, Nama the character really does.

Serai - is a hard name to translate, there's an inference of nobility and/or strength (se), and inference of a life path that is lived in a very non-typical way (rai). But she's a character who ends up working in a very hostile context, and manages to still kick ass in the office and eventually become a boss. She also kicks ass out of the office because she's actually a spy. In the real world, her name was a second generation mashing up of Sarah. A long time ago I had a brilliant friend called Sarah, and she died, so I kept her alive in the various versions of her name in the story (there are currently four of them in the larger scale of the story - which spans more than a hundred years).

Riian - Comes from RiiYaan, which the literal translation is "yellow path", but yellow is associated with joy and happiness, so what her name really means is "Joy". Also, fyi, her name is actually the male form, the womenly form is Riiana. This is one of my many little hints in the story to show which characters might be trans.

Anarian - is actually very similar to a Maori name "Anaru", which is a transliteration of Andrew. My first boy crush was called Andrew, (Anarian is a very old character). In the story Anarian is a mash up of his actual name An'aa, and his adopted sister's name Riian. An'aa's name doesn't translate from my conlang the nearest word "ana" which is a piece of grammar that marks the present tense in the middle of a sentence. He's an alien to the main characters, and on his homeworld, there was another one called An'aa, and this figure was brave and smart and adventurous, they're famous for discovering something that allowed his people to safely travel the stars. So, in his culture, his name means things like adventurous, smart, courageous, and most importantly, it means that his parent hopes he's destined for greatness.

I haven't yet interacted enough with writerly mutuals yet to remember their usernames enough to tag them, so if you see it (and are interested) feel free to consider yourself tagged.

[galunacycheckyourheadtour]

Searching for Komorebi Part 2 - Retreating at the Retreat

I had been researching retreats for a while and none had really stood out to me. By sheer chance, the day before my birthday this beautiful photo of a tree appeared on my IG feed with the words Resonant Land Retreat. It was being hosted by Kate Young, who was someone I had literally only just started following through She's Lost Control, an organisation that I regularly attended virtual events with. I read the description and scrolled through the photos, ancient forest bathing, wild swimming, sound healing circles, wood cabins - I knew it was for me. So I booked it as a birthday present to myself, it was very spontaneous and I am very grateful that I had the funds to do it at the time. Kate welcomed me warmly by email and I carefully filed it under the 'things to look forward to later in the year'. Well, later in the year came quicker than I expected, and a couple of days before I felt the classic anxiety creep in about attending. It was completely out of my comfort zone. I have never been brilliant in group situations - what on earth had I done?!! I panicked because I thought I would have been more well by the time the retreat would come round. The spiral of thoughts continued 'how was it May and I was still floundering?' I had nothing to say for myself. Again, another hard stare at myself and I got on with putting my kit together. I had invested in this amazing opportunity and I was going to embrace it.

I split the journey up to Bodmin and overnighted in Lyme Regis, knowing that I needed to give myself plenty of space and time to rest in the lead up. So by the time, I pulled off the A roads and into the tiny country lanes enshrouded by these fantastic trees & yellow gorse with wild ponies watching from the side of road, I started to feel the magic and excitement. I was greeted warmly by the Cabilla staff, the place was incredible. After check-in they showed me to my Koyt - I was absolutely blown away. As a child (and actually still as a an adult) I love small cubby holes, tree houses, wardrobes, tiny spaces to sit and hide, think or read. This was my dream space, a triangular cabin with huge windows looking out to the ancient temperate rainforestand it was all mine. I closed the door, lay on the bed and looked up at the trees and felt happy. Soon after, I started to hear the chattering of the other women arriving, the Whatsapp group fired into action and the plan for the first evening was shared. An opening ceremony, followed by dinner and our first ceremony. I pulled out my tarot cards, and pulled an Emperor card (which amazingly looked just like my Koyt), nine of cups and ten of cups - all great cards. I did some grounding and reiki, put on my coat, took and deep breath and walked up to the communal area to meet the other women, that I would be sharing the retreat with. I was the first to arrive, so nestled myself in an armchair and was soon joined by another lady who had driven down from London. She was lovely, we immediately bonded over similarities in our life and then more and more people joined, little interactions sprung up everywhere. It felt manageable and the group was amazing, a real multi generational group of 15 women from all walks of life. And off we went to the opening ceremony, marching through the fields past Gloria the Pig, sheep and their lambs to the hayloft where we greeted by Kate. She hugged each of us warmly, and I just loved her energy the minute I felt that connection. She held the space so well, communicating eloquently. yet passionately, about the weekend ahead. Then the moment I always dread the opening of the circle and talking about ourselves. I listened as each of my fellow attendees introduced themselves, they were so similar to me, their reasons for attending resonated, these were people that I understood and already knew I would care deeply about, they all spoke so well about their situations. I opened immediately with an apology for not being good at speaking out loud in a group (we will come back to this). I don't really remember what I said except I used an analogy; 'that I felt that I was in a fast flowing river, holding on to a tree branch scared to let go'. Saying words out loud and seeing the reassuring nods, changed something in me. We then journalled privately, I am going to share what I wrote:

'I am here and I am scared that my voice is not true, authentic or interesting. Im scared I do not fit in. But I will try and I will be open hearted to the process. Because this is a huge investment for me, and only me. I think I am scared of releasing and letting go of the things that no longer serve me. But I need to surrender. I need to step into my power and find my voice - my true voice, not the many different voices I use to fit in with different people. I need to trust my spirit guides in this magical place . A magical place that I know holds the key to moving forward. I am surprised at the level of emotion I am feeling already . I need to unravel and be the real me. Just me. I need to stop apologising' I walked back with a lovely lady, who told me I spoke well and was engaging. That was reassuring and I took the compliment, whilst screaming rubbish words at myself in my head. The evening was really lovely, with a communal dinner where I chatted with other participants - not normal chats, deep chats about life, spirituality and it was amazing - the shared values, these were people like me. I loved it, it kind of scared me, it certainly overwhelmed me but I already loved so many of them, I was invested in their journeys. These were good people, who needed healing and we were going to help each other. The ceremony that evening was celebrating the full moon, there was so much energy in the room and it was very special. We all moved silently after the ceremony in the darkness to our Koyt's to process the day. I was wired, I could not sleep and just lay in bed and stared at the trees and the stars. Thinking how it is so interesting, that I so rarely have conversations about the things I had that evening, stuff that genuinely I had knowledge and was passionate about with my holistic therapist background, I often hide that side to me, as I always feel it is looked upon as 'Hippie Dippie' or whatever. But it is something that lights me up and brings me so much joy. I also thought about how much work I had done on myself but it was always in silo. Meaning, that I would tap in and tap out, attend a class, have a superficial connection over the course of a couple of hours and then walk away. No feedback, no further communication. This was different, we were coming together as a coven, as a group, to heal and to witness each other's journey. It felt so much more powerful and something that I could not run away from, as much as my head for at least 30% was trying to do. I was awake most of the night, feeling overwhelmed by the power of everything, the location, the people, what was about to happen. In the morning, I was panicky and decided to not push myself too hard so pulled out of yoga, meditation and breakfast just to give myself some time to rest. Kate was very kind and said 'I needed to own the process' so I did. I really felt it was important to follow what my body was telling me. I joined the group for a breathwork session. Nobody mentioned that I had not been around in the morning, and that was lovely, I did not feel like a naughty school child. I thought I had done breathwork before but this was something different. Kate carefully explained the process and we begun, as a group. I immediately went into my head 'Am I doing this right, I am useless, I am not feeling anything, why am I so crap at this'.........and then it came out of nowhere, like someone had pulled a plug out of something deep inside of me, the tears started at first just leaking out of my eyes and then the sobbing started and did not stop. Wave after wave, the word 'loss' rolled around my head and I sobbed like a child. I remember constantly trying to grip at the floor, because I wanted to feel like I wanted to be sure I was connected. Now this sounds scary, it was not, it felt so natural, it felt like a relief, like something that needed to happen, it was positive, it was progress, I was surrendering and I felt safe and loved by the group. I have no idea how long I cried for, but it just kept coming.

When it ended, Kate encouraged me to go outside and be in the trees and nature - the tears just kept coming, I could not control them and it was a lot. I remember looking up at the trees, seeing the sunshine leaking through the branches and wondering what on earth had just happened and would I ever be able to stop crying. We went back to circle and shared our experiences, a lot of my fellow participants had similar experiences and it felt safe and the bonding between the group felt even stronger. Kate was brilliant throughout the whole session, acknowledging the reactions and speaking wisely about what had happened. I will talk a lot about safety, because I feel it is important, I felt safe and held throughout the whole thing, I knew I was not going to have to deal with what had happened alone - i was in the process, really in it. We returned to the communal space and had a delicious lunch, but were all obviously rocked by the experience, it was a lot. I kept feeling the waves of emotion, tears close to the surface and I was absolutely exhausted. I could not wait to get out on the nature walk and go wild swimming which followed lunch. The nature walk was everything I could have dreamed of and more. We descended into the temperate rainforest, the trees are over 3000 years old there. As they are so old, they have complex messaging systems underground, where they communicate with each other, telling the whole forest when to shed their acorns which they can do every couple of years in the space of a couple of days! This blew my mind, how amazing - it was magic, imagine the sound of that. I laughed, as usually on walks I am the only one touching the trees, taking photos of the branches, picking up stones and everyone was doing it. This was a group of 15 women who were all like me, it was hilarious - fellow nature nerds! We dawdled along to the river, marching through the mud in our wellies marvelling at the sound of the rushing water. The river is very special as contains so much quartz and crystal, it sparkles, the water is completely clear and clean - so completely drinkable. We did a water ceremony that was very special and then went into the amazing sauna on the banks of the river. After which we immersed in the cold stream, which was perfect. I think it was one of my favourite moments of the retreat, seeing the people who were pure water babies light up when entering the water, seeing others who were not so sure go for it. I remember talking through with a lady as she immersed into the water for the first time, keeping her calm. It was a special moment. We were given space to make our own way back, at our own speed back to our Koyt's, so I mooched along through the bluebells feeling refreshed - ready for a nap! The dinner that evening, was super fun - a chinese fakeaway - probably some of the best vegetarian food I have ever tasted. I could eat the mushroom pancakes forever...urgh now I really want one! It felt like a group of old friends on a Saturday night, and although we were all exhausted the mood was lovely. After dinner, we had the medicinal mushroom and cacao ceremony, which was really magical and again we drifted back to our Koyt's in silence. What a day!! (I am going to continue with the next day of retreat tomorrow, as this feels very long and I am sure you don't want war and peace!!)