#Reda Shepard

[painterofhorizons]

It‘s a long way getting over something like Akuze, and it‘s no one-way-street.

Reda Shepard, earthborn, sole survivor of humanity's first contact massacre with the Big Angry Space Worms. Find out more Akuze related writings, musings and art in my Akuze-masterpost. Long fic for the illustration is currently WIP. Starting quote is from the 20 times Akuze almost gets Shepard fic. Commission by the most wonderful @drawinglinestoconstellations! I am beyond words in appreciation for the incredible art and brilliant work with Marty. 14/10, do recommend!

[painterofhorizons]

So I was gonna reblog this as a nice gif set because I hold the apartment very dear and have written plenty with it for my Reda Shepard, but then I realized this is a mod making the apartment available in LE3 and like aaaaaaaaaah!!!!!! This is AMAZING! Now I can't wait to get back to play ME.

Pinnacle Station Apartment

[spaced0lphin]

For @painterofhorizons for @masseffectholidaycheer I am so sorry for the time this took me. I sincerely hope you enjoy it. :)

[bluesnyder]

My contribution for the 2017/2018 Mass Effect Holiday Gift Exchange, a watercolor portrait of @painterofhorizons’ Reda Shepard. Happy Holidays, fellow organic.

[kyratittyfish]

Question time! So, I forgot Jane's bg - was she a spacer? Colonist? While playing ME today some npc said "Genetic enhancements that every soldier in the alliance recieves" while discussing gene therapy issues and that reminded me of your thoughts on the translation implants and hearing, and you being a bio engineer. Now I wonder: any headcanon that you have or come up with regarding your Shep? (1/2, another ask incoming that belongs to this)

The complete question, for reference:

Question time! So, I forgot Jane's bg - was she a spacer? Colonist? While playing ME today some npc said "Genetic enhancements that every soldier in the alliance receives” while discussing gene therapy issues and that reminded me of your thoughts on the translation implants and hearing, and you being a bioengineer. Now I wonder: any headcanon that you have or come up with regarding your Shep? I imagine Reda being earthborn and basically BORN into the Reds has never had any contact with genetic engineering and had all quoted "genetic enhancements" that most seem to get pre-birth or as a child barely before joining the Alliance. Which made her not necessarily pro all that stuff, because life wasn't crap before either, right? Now I wonder how the different backgrounds affect Shepard's opinions on genetic enhancements (and, of course, Project Lazarus).

Super interesting question!

My Shep is a spacer. Her family has been in the Alliance for generations, and this gave her parents access to top-tier genetic screenings and enhancements pre-birth. 

One important detail about her is related to her (second, but actually preferred) name, Angela. The other Angela she was named after was her father’s sister; unfortunately, she passed away in her late teens (before our Commander was even born) due to a genetic illness. The screening procedures and corrections for her specific disease weren’t available yet when Shepard’s late aunt was born, so her disease wasn’t discovered until after her birth. Her untimely death had a profound impact on Mark Shepard (Jane’s father): seeing his sister struggle for all her life with such a cruel illness until she eventually succumbed to it made him determined to do anything in his power to prevent his daughter from going through something similar. 

The genetic modifications Jane was given in utero were mostly related to disease prevention. After enlisting, she received the standard military enhancements for improved strength, reflexes, and healing capabilities. As one can imagine, Cerberus gave her some genetic modification during the Lazarus Project as well. 

Now, on to Shepard’s opinion on all of this. 

For years, young Jane didn’t think too much about it. She was given genetic modifications before she was even born, and most of her family and friends had enhancements as well, so she considered it something almost natural. 

As a teen, after getting to know more about her late aunt, she developed an interest in the topic of genetic engineering: for a while, she even entertained the idea of studying to become a geneticist, and while still in school she took a few courses on genomics and genetic engineering. Enlisting and getting to know more people from various socioeconomic backgrounds gave her a practical frame of reference to compare to her scientific knowledge: many enlistees didn’t have any genetic modifications done, and the standard military ones were their first. 

In general, she sees genetic modification as an enormous scientific breakthrough that can offer extraordinary benefits. On the other hand, she’s well aware of the privileges it brings: people born into families of lower socioeconomic status (like Jeff) can often only get the basic gene mod package to prevent the most common genetic disorders, while children born into rich families usually get way more expensive modifications that give them an edge on several fields (health, athletic performances, intelligence, looks…), further increasing the gap between classes.

After the war (she survives it), and after the bulk of the reconstruction is done, she starts a campaign to enable people of lower socioeconomic status to access a wider array of genetic testing and modifications, hoping to provide more and more people with the same privileges that were basically only available to the rich before the war. 

[rpgwrites]

RPGWarrior4824′s Fic Recs Part 1

The Fisher’s Lure - say_lene

Female Ryder/ Reyes Vidal 

Things didn’t end well between Sara and Reyes following the events of High Noon. Reconciliation has to be kicked into overdrive when Kaetus tries to use the Pathfinder to avenge Sloane Kelly, but no plans are ever perfect - and Sara and Reyes soon find that nothing’s ever easy, either.

Isharay -  say_lene

Female Ryder/ Reyes Vidal 

Making a long-distance relationship work is hard, particularly when the participants are two driven professionals. But trouble is stirring in Heleus, and Sara and Reyes soon realize that distance is nothing compared to the past...

Videotape - The_Red_Celt

Female Shepard/ Garrus Vakarian 

Garrus has Corpalis Syndrome, like his mother before him, but he is determined not to forget Shepard, no matter what that might entail. Inspired by a kinkmeme prompt and the Radiohead song of the same name.

The Cetus Arc - @natsora

Female Ryder/ Jaal Ama Darav

She is Sara Ryder - the Shield of Meridian, the human Pathfinder. She has earned her scars and her reputation.

But strip her to her core, who is she? Who is Sara Ryder, not the Pathfinder, not the Shield of Meridian?

The Cetus Arc is where you get to know her as a human, daughter and sister.

This takes place 6 months after the events of the Archon Arc. You don't have to read one to enjoy the other.

Memini - @natsora

Female Ryder/ Vetra Nyx

Waking up bound and gagged with no memory of how it happened is a sure sign of a concussion or worse. But before Ryder could piece her threadbare memories back together, the door opens and a strange turian is shove in. Who is her new roommate and what the fuck is going on?

The Two Commanders - Katieee

Female Shepard/ Cullen Rutherford

When Commander Shepard destroys the Reapers, she expects to die along with them. She does not expect to wake up in a strange, medieval world where people mistake her biotics for magic. Her plan is to find Liara, who accompanied her to the Crucible, and find her way home — providing she can outwit the grumpy Templar chasing her.

Starting in Kirkwall just before the Mage rebellion and then skipping on through to Inquisition, get ready for two old soldiers struggling to redeem themselves and the slowest of burns.

Spectral -  Katieee

Female Shepard/ Cullen Rutherford

There was one mage in the Gallows who had never been like the others; she was loud, defiant, and she flirted constantly with the Knight-Captain. Really, there was only one thing Meredith could do about her.

And though Cullen had promised to kill Shepard if she was ever made Tranquil, keeping that vow turned out to be a lot more difficult than he'd expected.

Dissonance - massulevin

Female Ryder/ Reyes Vidal 

Avery Ryder didn't want to be on the Pathfinder team, but she didn't want to stay behind in the Milky Way either. As a compromise, she joined the Initiative with plans to work in Colonial Affairs -- but those plans come crashing down after she wakes from stasis too early, joins the rebellion, and is banished with the rest of the exiles.

On Kadara, she makes do with what she has. She works for Sloane Kelly to make ends meet until she just can't stand to see Sloane taking advantage of the exiles for one more minute. Once again, her plans come crashing down, and she finds salvation with the Collective -- and a certain smuggler who always seems to be around every corner.

Starts between Nexus Uprising and the beginning of Andromeda and continues to the end of the game. Updates on Wednesdays.

Loss - ShootingStar7123

Female Shepard/ Garrus Vakarian

A decade after the reaper war, EDI faces the sudden and unexpected death of Joker. The crew comes together to remember and mourn. EDI seeks understanding. EDI/Joker, Shepard/Garrus.

Memories - @ooachilliaoo

Other

This day stirs up a lot of memories for her. Some are good, some are less good and some are bad. But traditions are to be respected and even though it hurts there's only one place Dr T'soni can go on the anniversary of the end of the Reaper war.

I Have Questions - @crqstalite

Female Shepard/ Kaidan Alenko

❝ Do you care, do you care? Why don't you care? I gave you all of me My blood, my sweat, my heart, and my tears Why don't you care, why don't you care? I was there, I was there, when no one was Now you're gone and I'm here❞ -Camila Cabello, I Have Questions.

*

Mars. The planet would always be etched into her mind. For all the wrong reasons.

One Way Out - @pigeontheoneandonly

Gen

Before she was Commander Shepard, Nathaly was a spec ops marine stationed in the Skyllian Verge. On a routine check-in of a colony that's fallen silent, she finds herself in a fight for her life. Alone, seriously injured, and without resources, she must find a way to outwit her opponent and survive.

20 Times Akuze almost gets Shepard - @painterofhorizons

Gen

After Akuze, Shepard fights to gain back agency.

(Covers both how Reda Shepard deals with the aftermath of Akuze and how she ended up working with Anderson.) (First part: pre-games, second part to come later with in-game events.)

Free - @nug-juggler

Female Hawke/ Fenris

Fenris can’t remember her last words to him.

He remembers her final utterance with complete clarity—a small grunt as the blade entered her back and burst straight through her armor. The gurgle as it was withdrawn. The clatter of her daggers falling from her hands. And finally, the last sound Hawke ever made, a thud as her body fell to the floor.

Danarius fell a moment later, his heart first, then the rest of him. Fenris had already crossed the room, Hawke in his arms, still and empty.

He remembers her last words to the world before the fight. Fenris is a free man.

[theoriginalladya]

painterofhorizons

Do it. And then please reassure me just how much mass effect that song is. It has been my Reda Shepard mass effect song ever since and every time it runs somewhere me head is!!!!!!! Mass effect reaper fight!!!! Lol.

~~~

Oh, hell, I’M SOLD!!!!!!!!!    God, I can see so many different images for that one!

[hunnybadgerv]

painterofhorizons mentioned you on a post “Reda Shepard on AO3”

@guileandgall it is! :D isn't she a darling? I'm having feels rn (all Andersons fault tbh).

Sure as hell. She’s lovely. And Anderson is always to blame. Hehe. It has to be someone’s fault. 

[vinayv224]

Sarah L. Voisin/Washington Post via Getty Images

North Carolina has to redraw districts before presidential primaries; Lebanon prime minister steps down as protests continue.

Vox Sentences is your daily digest for what’s happening in the world. Sign up for the Vox Sentences newsletter, delivered straight to your inbox Monday through Friday, or view the Vox Sentences archive for past editions.

North Carolina court orders new map

A North Carolina state court has thrown out the state’s Republican-drawn map of congressional districts — ordering the state to draw a new map, even if that means postponing the 2020 primary elections. [The New York Times / Michael Wines]

This isn’t the first time this year that North Carolina’s legislative maps have lost in court: A state legislative map was ruled unconstitutional in September. [Vox / Ella Nilsen and Tara Golshan]

Under the current map, Republicans hold 10 out of 13 congressional districts, a far greater share than votes for the GOP in the state. [Politico / Steve Shepard and Ally Mutnick]

North Carolina legislators now must redraw congressional districts without drawing on racial or political affiliation data. [Slate / Elliot Hannon]

While the decision said that the freeze could impact presidential primary voting in March, “those consequences pale in comparison to voters of our state proceeding to vote, yet again, in congressional elections administered pursuant to maps drawn in violation of our North Carolina Constitution.” [NBC News / Pete Williams]

The Supreme Court ruled earlier this year it could not take part in deciding on state gerrymandering cases. [The Columbus Dispatch / Jessica Wehrman]

How did North Carolina get so gerrymandered to begin with? One man drew out districts to elect Republicans. [Vox / Alvin Chang]

WhatsApp tax is Lebanon leader’s undoing

Tuesday, Lebanon Prime Minister Saad Hariri resigned from his post in response to protester demands. [The Guardian / Martin Chulov]

A proposed WhatsApp tax was the final straw two weeks ago, sparking fury about government corruption and poor living conditions for the vast majority of Lebanese. [Reuters]

Members from Lebanon’s nearly 20 sects came together in the streets for peaceful demonstrations that featured singing and dancing. [NPR / Daniel Estrin and Lama al-Arian]

Solidarity demonstrations were held in cities across America last week, bringing out many members of the Lebanese diaspora under red, white, and green flags. [The 961 / Nour Abdul Reda]

Miscellaneous

Why Lt. Col. Alexander Vindman’s immigrant background is a strength in his testimony about an “America-first” president. [The Atlantic / David A. Graham]

How the FAA kept Boeing’s defective planes in the air long after they should have been grounded. [Wall Street Journal / Andy Pasztor and Andrew Tangel]

California household workers brave fires while their employers flee without a second thought. [Los Angeles Times / Brittny Mejia]

A prison journalist looks to atone for the crimes that once put him behind bars, and attempt to apologize to the family of his murder victim. [Washington Post / John J. Lennon]

The scandal surrounding Rep. Katie Hill is more complex than it initially appears. [Vox / Anna North]

Verbatim

“They are suffering from harsh humanitarian conditions and are in need of shelter. Let them go and do not threaten their safety.” [Coordinator of General Authority for Syrian Refugees Affairs Hala Hassan Darwish on the status of Syrian refugees in Egypt]

Listen to this: California’s blackouts

California is on fire, having rolling blackouts again. The Today, Explained team explores why the two are connected, and why blackouts might be a good thing in the long run for the country. [Spotify]

Read more

Poor kids spend nearly 2 hours more on screens each day than rich kids

Denny’s is selling Beyond Burgers now

Find Me, the Call Me By Your Name sequel, is tender, melancholy, and deeply flawed

How foil balloons went from Instagram bait to every party in America

The dog-walking startup Wag is exploring a sale

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[nofomoartworld]

Hyperallergic: Art Movements

Opening of “Monument,” a temporary art installation by Manaf Halbouni on the historical Neumarkt in Dresden, in front of the Church of Our Lady, Tuesday 7th of February (photo by David Brandt, courtesy Kunsthaus Dresden)

Art Movements is a weekly collection of news, developments, and stirrings in the art world.

Around 150 anti-immigration protesters gathered in Dresden to disrupt the unveiling of Manaf Halbouni‘s “Monument,” a public sculpture dedicated to the people of Aleppo. The sculpture, which consists of three upturned buses fastened together with wire, refers to a photograph of a barricade built on the streets of Aleppo in 2015. According to Christiane Mennicke-Schwarz, the artistic director of the Dresden Kunsthaus, the opening was disrupted by chants of “traitors” and “get lost.”

Sotheby’s filed a second lawsuit over the sale of a group of Old Master paintings that it believes to be forgeries. The auction house filed a lawsuit against art dealer Mark Weiss and collector David Kowitz in order to recover the profits of the 2011 private sale of “Portrait of a Man,” which Sotheby’s attributed to Frans Hals at the time. In a statement, Weiss said that he “intends to contest the claim vigorously.”

The Louvre Museum was reopened less than 24-hours after a man attacked a French soldier with a machete. An Egyptian Interior Ministry official identified the attacker as 28-year-old Abdullah Reda Refaie al-Hamahmy.

German prosecutors announced that a 36-year-old Tunisian man arrested on terrorism charges is also being held for his suspected involvement in the 2015 attack on the Bardo Museum in Tunis.

The Bombay High Court rejected Chintan Upadhyay‘s bail application. The artist stands accused of murdering his wife Hema and her lawyer Haresh Bhambani.

Pontormo, “Portrait of a Young Man in a Red Cap” (1530) (courtesy DCMS)

American hedge fund manager Tom Hill rejected a £30.7 million ($38.4 million) matching offer from London’s National Gallery for the purchase of Pontormo’s “Portrait of a Young Man in a Red Cap” (1530), a decision he attributes to the fall in the pound’s value. The UK government is likely to refuse a permanent export licence as a result. An export bar was placed on the work in 2015.

Hundreds of artists, dealers, critics, and curators signed an open letter opposing President Donald Trump’s executive order banning non-US citizens from seven Muslim-majority countries.

A report by Bloomberg identified Oprah Winfrey as the former owner of Gustav Klimt’s “Portrait of Adele Bloch-Bauer II” (1912). The work was privately sold to an Asian buyer last year for a reported $150 million. An unnamed source told Bloomberg that it was Winfrey who purchased the work at Christie’s for $87.9 million in 2006.

The New Art Dealers Alliance announced that it will donate half the ticket proceeds from its upcoming New York fair to the American Civil Liberties Union.

Tracey Emin and gallerist Xavier Hufkens are two of five benefactors funding a four-year scholarship for three Syrian refugees at Bard College Berlin. The scholarships are part of the Program for International Education and Social Change.

A book of Tahitian photographs taken by Jules Agostini is thought to contain images of Paul Gauguin and his mistress Pahura. Two albums of Agostini’s photographs — a friend of the artist — were sold at auction in July 2015, one of which was acquired by art dealer Daniel Blau.

A group photograph by Jules Agostini allegedly showing Gauguin in Tahiti (© Daniel Blau, Munich)

Archaeologists discovered a cave in the Judean desert that is thought to have housed a collection of Dead Sea scrolls.

The FBI repatriated Franse Verzijl’s “Young Man as Bacchus” to the Max and Iris Stern Foundation.

A search of the State Hermitage Museum’s Staraya Derevnya restoration and repository center by the Federal Security Service (FSB) was part of an investigation into “operational procedures” according to the museum’s director, Mikhail Piotrovsky. As noted by the Art Newspaper, the FSB’s search coincided with Piotrovsky’s criticism of the Russian government’s decision to transfer control of St Isaac’s Cathedral from museum officials to the Russian Orthodox Church.

A portrait of Queen Elizabeth II by photographer David Bailey was reissued to mark the monarch’s sapphire jubilee.

Attendance to the UK’s major museums and galleries fell by almost 1.4 million last year according to a report by the Department of Culture, Media and Sport — the first decline in almost a decade.

A collection of water-damaged recordings of Bob Marley‘s concerts were restored following a $31,200 project. The 13 tapes — two of which were blank and one ruined — were discovered in the basement of a run-down hotel in Kensal Rise, London.

Transactions

Jacob Lawrence, “Builders #1” (1968), gouache and tempera on paper, 29 x 21 1/2 in, Colby College Museum of Art, the Lunder Collection (photo by Peter Siegel, Pillar Digital Imaging LLC. © 2017 The Jacob and Gwendolyn Knight Lawrence Foundation, Seattle / Artists Rights Society, ARS, New York)

Peter and Paula Lunder donated over 1,100 artworks to the Colby Colby College Museum of Art.

The Canadian government allocated $5.1 million from the Canada Cultural Spaces Fund to the Museum of Contemporary Art Toronto Canada.

Jeanne and Michael L. Klein donated 28 video works to the Blanton Museum of Art. The gift includes works by Tania Bruguera, Isaac Julien, Pipilotti Rist, and Javier Téllez.

The Andrew W. Mellon Foundation donated $400,000 toward the Museum of Contemporary Art, Denver‘s “Animating Museums” program.

MCH group acquired a 25.1% stake in art.fair International, the organizer of Art Düsseldorf. The Swiss conglomerate acquired 60.3% of the shares in Seventh Plane Pvt. Ltd in New Delhi, the organizer of the India Art Fair, last September.

The Columbia Museum of Art acquired works by Bing Davis, Renée Cox, Michaela Pilar Brown, and Colin Quashie — all of whom took part in the museum’s 2016 exhibition REMIX: Themes and Variations in African-American Art.

Renée Cox, “Liberation of Aunt Jemima and Uncle Ben” (1998), dye destruction print, Diasec mounted, 8 1/2 x 61 1/2 in, museum purchase (courtesy Columbia Museum of Art)

Transitions

Peter Keller was appointed director general of the International Council of Museums.

Manuel de Santaren was appointed president of the Cisneros Fontanals Art Foundation.

Jock Reynolds will stand down as the director of the Yale Art Gallery next year.

The New York Times reported that Michelle D. Gavin stepped down as the director of The Africa Center over three months ago.

Karen Hindsbo was appointed director of Norway’s National Museum.

Laurel Ptak was appointed executive director of Art in General.

Silvia Filippini Fantoni was appointed director of programs and audience engagement at the North Carolina Museum of Art.

Dirk Boll was appointed president, Christie’s Europe, Middle East, Russia and India. Bertold Müeller was appointed managing director, Christie‘s Continental Europe, Middle East, Russia and India.

Sotheby’s appointed Adam Chinn as its chief operating officer.

Harry Dalmeny was appointed UK chairman of Sotheby’s.

Gabriel Pérez-Barreiro was appointed curator of the 2018 São Paulo Biennial.

Jen Graves resigned as art critic for The Stranger.

The 2017 Spring/Break Art Show will take place over two floors at 4 Times Square.

Tim Youd is now represented by the Cristin Tierney Gallery.

Washburn Gallery will vacate its space at 20 West 57th Street amid speculation that the building will be demolished for redevelopment.

Christie’s announced that it will open a new, 5,400-square-foot space in Beverly Hills, California.

Accolades

Hans Haacke, “Gift Horse” (2014), horse: bronze with black patina and wax finish stainless steel fasteners and supports, bow: 5mm flexible LED display stainless steel armature polycarbonate face, 15 ft 3 in x 14 ft 1 in x 5 ft 5 in (© Hans Haacke / Artists Rights Society, ARS, New York, photo by Hans Haacke, courtesy the artist and Paula Cooper Gallery, New York)

Hans Haacke was awarded the 2017 Roswitha Haftmann Prize.

Günter Herzog was awarded the 2017 Art Cologne Prize.

Opportunities

The Lower East Side Printshop is accepting applications for its one-year, Keyholder Residency program. Emerging artists have until March 1 to apply.

Obituaries

Marta Becket (1924–2017), dancer. Founder of the Amargosa Opera House.

Annette Cravens (unconfirmed–2017), artist and arts patron.

Henry-Louis de la Grange (1924–2017), musicologist and critic. Biographer of Gustav Mahler.

Buchi Emecheta (1944–2017), writer.

Gwendolyn Gillen (1941–2017), sculptor.

Walter Hautzig (1921–2017), pianist.

Dame Jennifer Jenkins (1921–2017), former chair of the National Trust.

William Melvin Kelley (1937–2017), novelist.

Harry Matthews (1930–2017), writer.

Howard Frank Mosher (1942–2017), novelist.

David Shepard (1940–2017), film preservationist.

Rob Stewart (1979–2017), filmmaker. Best known for Sharkwater (2006).

Tzvetan Todorov (1939–2017), literary theorist and historian.

The post Art Movements appeared first on Hyperallergic.

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[painterofhorizons]

"How's Giles doing?"

It's a macabre question to ask, but it cuts to the chase.

Shepard shrugs. The answer is as simple as fucked up.

"Better."

Well, obviously Giles isn't better. There's no way he can get better, because he's dead. He's rotting in the dirt of Akuze, eaten alive by thresher maw acid, cowering behind a rock right next to Reda. He's taken most of the hit, and she hasn't (still got enough damage to need a trachea transplant and eighteen percent third degree burns on her skin, but she's alive and he's not, so that's that).

Corporal Giles won't get better.

But he stopped haunting her every single night, and every single minute of the day, and every single art therapy session. Because he's the only thing of Akuze she remembers and while she's bad at drawing, she's apparently gifted in the horror genre, and she's gotta draw something.

Maybe she'll draw something else tomorrow.

Or maybe she won't.

Because Giles is better, but he's still dead.

[firgolfin]

OC kiss week: smooooching @painterofhorizons‘ amazing oc, Reda Shepard.

[painterofhorizons]

bring unto me (irregular nights)

Shepard sees the Kodiak more often than she should, and at irregular times. Steve and James have different opinions about it, or don't they? (1k, gen/no warnings, ME3 cargo bay domecticity)

* * *

„Did you notice?“

Steve Cortez was already up and moving by an hour when James Vega crawled out of bed in the morning. James had heard the elevator’s whiz – characteristic, yet soft enough to not startle him in his corner –, heard the familiar bubbling of the coffee maker, and heard Steve rumble in the shuttle bay a mere two minutes later. Same time, same lag, same routine. Just like every morning. Every movement was executed with such a precise reliability, that James noticed it, smiled a little, and rolled around to catch a few more minutes of sleep. As long as Steve’s routine stayed alive, there was little to worry about. As far as that could be true in times of galaxy wide war and Earth burning.

To James, it felt like that guy never slept. At all. Not a single hour. And it wasn‘t like James spent a long time in bed either – it was barely five thirty in a 24 hour cycle – but Steve motherfucking Cortez? It was a miracle how he was able to stand on his own two feet and still be the best damn shuttle pilot James ever met. Best requisitions officer, too. Second best armory representative. Disregarding this singular blind spot, guy was a real physiological miracle. The first human to not need sleep or something. Or maybe he was on really good drugs. Whatever it was, sometimes James caught himself being envious on that guy.

„Notice what, Esteban?“ James replied, still tired and not yet near to where his brain would be after he’d had his first coffee. The one he knew was waiting for him already, because Steve was a goddamn machine and making him coffee was just one of the tiny tasks in his morning routine.

„That she‘s spending her nights in the Kodiak.“

* * *

Read on AO3. Props for the title to @shadoedseptmbr

[painterofhorizons]

poh's Akuze masterpost

Since Akuze is my fav Mass Effect playground since 2020, it's time for a masterpost.

Published Fic (x)

20 times Akuze almost gets Shepard (AO3, tumblr): After Akuze, Shepard fights to gain back agency. // 8k, pre-ME1, PTSD, recovery, Captain Anderson

Ghosts from the Past, pt. 01 (AO3, tumblr): Fifteen months after surviving the thresher maw massacre on Akuze, Shepard is confronted with ghosts from her past, when a relative of one of her dead former comrades takes a position on the same vessel that she’s assigned to. // 2k, pre-ME1, Engineer Adams

Ghosts from the Past, pt. 02 (AO3): With both of them hurting a relative’s death, Adams tries to mend burning bridges. // 3.5k, pre-ME1, Engineer Adams

Area secure, Commander (AO3): Tali’s first encounter with a thresher maw doesn’t exactly go ideal, but little does she know. // 1.5k, ME1, PTSD, Tali, Garrus

Currently Working On

The Good, Bad, And The Ugly (work in progress): An episode long fic for the post-Akuze recovery, losely following the 20 Times timeline, but adjusting things and diving deeper into the struggles, people and places important during the long way back. It takes fire to forge a N7 soldier. // ~18 chapters, pre-ME1, PTSD, recovery, Captain Anderson, James vega, Jeff Joker Moreau

WIPs

Arcturus Station, 2179

Two Aces In Disguise

Of all things Akuze has taken from her, the ability to communicate is the most excruciating one.

at some point post-Akuze in the rehab facility, Shepard meets a young James Vega

jello

reliving Akuze

“How’s Giles doing?”

grief

white noise

birthday

cake

Tabatha Adams

tbc

Art

post Akuze promotion portrait

meta human portraits Reda Shepard&James Vega & updated version

illustration for the post-Akuze rehab long fic

[previews below, please see the original posts above for quali!)

Akuze Giving Me A Headache (random musings)

x x x x x

Things I've Said (asks)

x x x x

Random Bits And Pieces

Mass Effect Writing Masterpost incl. non-Akuze writings

Last updated: 2024-11-03

[painterofhorizons]

gone

(aka the one time I made a joke about eggs and it turned into Angst.)

Shepard remembers something good among all the bad, but then she doesn't. James was fast to say: It’s okay. Don’t worry. It’s fine – but it wasn’t. He had told her too many times, and it upset her. So he stopped and just lay there with her, enduring it, patiently, quietly, arms wrapped around her.

1k, post-war, Reda Shepard/James Vega, also on AO3

~ ~ ~

There’s no winning in a war. No glory in survival. No words in the shadow – and sometimes not even in the light.

“You made eggs”, Reda says, startling James from sleep.

Years after the war against the Reapers ended it is still an instinctive reaction for him, being alert in a split second at the slightest noise. But years of war have also left a mark on him and it’s not so easy anymore coming back from sleep to reality. It takes him a moment to add the smell of their apartment and the weight of the blanket covering them like a nest and the lack of the constant low hum that had surrounded them in space to the picture, forming a whole thing, reality slowly dripping in to years of conditioning under a constant state of galactic emergency.

“What?”, he mutters, mind still half where between sleep and awake.

“Eggs”, Reda repeats quietly.

He realizes by the tone of her voice that she is sleep drunken-tired, not exhaustion-tired, and his body slowly relaxes. His arms wrap around her just a little tighter, as to make sure she is really here, in front of him, under the same blanket, in the same apartment, down on Earth – not on some cold spaceship or under a pile of blood and dirt and rubble.

Eggs.

“When?”

“At the…”

The slow movement in his arms stops. Freezes.

“On the…”

Another instinct kicks in as James hands gently lay on Reda’s bare skin, seeking connection, applying soft pressure, trying to be an anchor in what is to follow.

“When we were–“

The warm, indistinct feeling that her dream had carried is gone in a heartbeat, leaving nothing but grey and soul crushing emptiness in Reda’s chest.

Eggs.

There had been something in her mind that had whispered: it wasn’t all bad. Remember me, not them. But it is gone and instead, there is a dread lingering somewhere deep down inside of her. Tenacious. Relentless. Erratic.

Inevitable.

“I’m here”, James whispers, words getting lost in the dense fog inside Reda’s head.

James was fast to say:

It’s okay.

Don’t worry.

It’s fine.

 – but it wasn’t.

On a good day Reda had gotten angry on him, yelled at him (though it wasn’t proper yelling, it wasn’t even raising her voice, it was trying at best but her body refused, and it made her just angrier), blamed him he was basically telling her to just give up, they all did, everyone told her that it was okay when it wasn’t, she wasn’t, her brain wasn’t–

So he stopped.

It killed him to see her fight like that. To see her in a constant war with herself, with her brain, with her body that was broken beyond repair, and he didn’t know if it would be easier if she would just accept it or if that was giving up. Giving in. Admitting defeat. But what did giving up even mean? Was it the end or a beginning? A necessary step on the way to recovery or just closing the door to whatever could be coming?

Whatever it was, it was okay. They were still here, after all. Alive. Whole enough for it to count.

But he didn’t say it’s okay, or don’t worry, or it’s fine.

He lay with her in bed, in their apartment, under the blanket that covered them like a nest, without the constant hum of a space ship, feeling the battle she fought in her tense shoulders, in the heaviness of her breath, in the movement of the blanket under her fists, while she was desperately searching for words and thoughts and memories that had been there just a second ago but were gone now that she was aware of them. She knew they’d been there, but they weren’t.

He didn’t tell her it was okay because for her it wasn’t. And he didn’t tell her that by now he knew what she meant because he did remember, even if she didn’t. Because telling her would just upset her, even more so, because it was her battle, not his, and all he could offer was enduring it with her and not leaving her side.

Not giving up.

He wanted to tell her it was okay, because it was. It was okay that the words weren’t there. The memories. It was okay that she was upset about it. And that while none of it was good, they were still here, alive, and the goddamn war was over, so it was okay.

– but he didn’t. He had told her too many times, and it upset her. So he stopped and just lay there with her, enduring it, patiently, quietly, arms wrapped around her, waiting for her to dictate the terms of war, not him, nor the world. Because it was her war after all.

“Help me”, she whispers, because it’s a battle she can’t win, just like the war, no matter how hard she tries.

“We had a party on the Citadel on shore leave”, he calmly says, “and I made eggs for breakfast. You told me it was the best eggs you ever had in your whole life.”

Reda half sniffs, half snorts. “I did not.”

James smirks against the back of her head, face nuzzled into her hair, his breath warm and damp on her skin. “Who knows? You should try my eggs and prove me wrong.”

Some of the tension in her body eases up again and James draws her a little closer.

“I don’t want eggs”, she mumbles and closes her eyes.

She’s bloody tired.

Exhausted.

How can hunting down words make her so God awfully tired?

“I know”, James repeats quietly.

I’m sorry, he adds in his thoughts, but doesn’t say it.

There’s no winning in this war.

(also on AO3)

[painterofhorizons]

Twenty months after Akuze, cake seems to be her new nemesis.

Reda stares at the soft vanilla sponge cake in front of her for a full five minutes without noticing the time passing by or the glare on Cynthia’s face growing more and more concerned. Finally, the older woman decides to interrupt the stare-off.

“You okay?”

Reda immediately nods without blinking, as if she’s following orders, eyes fixating the cake, and picks a small piece onto her pastry fork, giving the impression both the cake and the fork are soaked in acid.

“I’m fine”, she reassures Cynthia, voice as absentminded as her whole presence.

She stares at the tiny piece of cake on the pastry fork. It’s the fork with the decorated end, a small ceramics ball with a decent floral pattern, the one Cynthia only uses for special occasions. Like birthdays, or bullshit like surviving what killed fifty and should have killed her, too.

Her skin starts tingling.

“You don’t have to-“

“I said I’m fine”, Reda cuts her, a little sharper than necessary, and adds in a slightly more defensive tone “It’s fine, really. It’s just my head getting in the way sometimes.”

She ignores Cynthia’s demur that they don’t have to have cake right now, and forces herself to chew and swallow that tiny bite of horribly sweet and soft vanilla sponge cake on the fancy pastry fork. She gets herself to take two more tiny bites from the slice on her plate, before the creeps on her scalp get too bad to just sit here and continue eating cake.

“Just my head”, she mutters again, and wants to crack a half heartened smile, if only for Cynthia, but she can’t. “The cake’s good. I’m good. It’s fine.”

Her skin is itching so bad.

She asked for this, after all. For the cake. This specific cake in particular. The same recipe Cynthia has made since she’d moved in shortly before her sixteenth birthday, eight years ago.

She wanted cake.

Or maybe she just wanted to want cake.

Or maybe something completely different.

She can’t tell, her mind is a huge vast empty blank fucking hole right now.

But Cynthia made the cake, the one that she asked for, and she will eat it and not be an ungrateful little shit.

It’s just cake, she tells herself.

But her skin is on fire.