#Reader X Azriel

[itsswritten]

Cauldron-born

Pairing: Azriel x fem reader

Word Count: 1.7K

Summary: When an unexplainable energy pulls the Inner Circle to barge into the Day court, they're all shocked at what they find. But it's Azriel who can't help wonder if his dreams have finally been answered.

Part 2

“I hadn’t meant to hide this from you Rhysand,” Helion’s usual warm tone was replaced with something sterner, bolder— unwavering.

A breeze pulled on your skirt, the floaty material rippling under the wind. It was always warm in Day, but now, with the appearance of uninvited guests, there was a coldness in the air you hadn’t experienced before.

A bite that pulled at your skin raising goosebumps across your arms.

You guessed this reaction wasn’t a rare occurrence when facing the Night Courts Inner Circle.

Helion shifted his weight, his body stood in front of yours in a protective manner. A nervousness emitted from his energy, an emotion that actually seemed strange to even be associated with him. 

Helion wasn’t the nervous type. Charming and flirtatious, bold and defiant— not nervous.

Helion pushed his shoulders back, his stance flexing against the shadowy group that had just arrived. 

They had shaken him. 

Perhaps you were naive to think these people wouldn’t, naive to believe you could live your life quietly. Slip through the cracks. Go unnoticed. No you were not destined for that, as much as your dear friend may have wanted that for you.

So if a quiet life was not meant to be, then you would at least claim it as yours. 

With a light step you moved from behind Helion to his side, coming into full view of the group who had appeared unannounced in the courtyard. Your hand came to Helion’s gently, giving him a soft squeeze and light smile that stretched to your eyes.

How they had gotten through Day Courts shields didn’t come as a surprise really. Helion had divulged how powerful the High Lord of the Night Court was. That if he really wanted to take them all down, then Helion suspected in that unrelenting pit of power Rhys probably could.

But despite this power, Rhys had never ravaged control over the land. Helion was fond of Rhys and his family, they were allies. Perhaps he would even consider them friendly.

And yet Helion hadn’t told them about you.

Energies and rhythms rippling from their bodies, all with their own melody of colours unique to them floated toward you. Your eyes scanned over their features quickly, reading their expressions, the tight lines their faces made before one look pulled you to a hasty stop.

A hazel lock held you tightly as a males gaze ensnared you. 

Golden rays broke through a midnight blue aura, trapping you in a moment that seemed to expand and retract all at once. He was the most beautiful male you’d ever laid eyes on, and it took every ounce of will power to pull your gaze from his.

There was a simmering at the pit of your stomach, something familiar and warm, and you swore you could hear singing—

“She is like us.” A girl from the back of the crowd spoke, beautiful and sweet. Elain, you assumed. Her aura, one that resembled sunlight radiating in golden flicks. If you hadn’t known who she was you’d had assumed she was a Day court resident from her glow alone.

Elain stepped forward, another girl stepping beside her as if they’d both been pulled by the same magnetic pulse to the front of the group.

This girl. This girl was Nesta. You were sure of it. That silver flickering aura licked at her skin, an energy so similar and yet so different to her sisters.

“Hm..no not exactly like us…” Elain seemed to mutter, more to herself than anyone else. Her eyes scanning you as she tried to get a read, try and decipher what had pulled her here in the first place. 

Why you had pulled them here.

“Something other.” Nesta spoke.

You don’t think she’d actually intended for it to sound so venomous, but the words had snapped like poison. You noticed how for a split second there was a softeness in her energy. Whether she was regretful of her tone or not, you had flinched at the word.

Other.

Hm. Perhaps that was the best way to describe you.

Elain glanced at her sister, her face not changing as she digested Nesta’s words. There was a shuffling behind them, only slight and small. Would barely be noticeable if it wasn’t so hard for you not to notice.

Him.

His scarred fingers twitched at his sides, shadows swirling around them as they peered over those giant black membranes that were drawn in at his back. A tattoo creeped up the side of his neck, peeking through his shirt as you followed up to his jaw. Black leather’s covered his body, blue siphons shimmering under the setting sun. You tried so hard not to let your eyes wander back, but as though you had no control you gaze landed on his again. 

Only to find he was already staring.

Azriel.

Helion had mentioned him to you before and you recalled how you had rolled the name a few times in your mouth. The name feeling so foreign and familiar all at once.

“Not cauldron-made, no not quite.” Elain had turned her attention back to you.

You had stepped forward now, stepped out from the shadow of Helion.

Stepped out to face what you had been avoiding. 

“You are Cauldron-born.” 

✵

“Would you like to join us for some tea?” Your response had been after Elain’s heavy statement.

Your words coming out in a flurry to cut through the heaviness in the air. Despite being outside it felt stifling. Several eyes piercing into you. You could almost hear the way they were trying to decipher you— breakdown what Elain had said. 

You hadn’t allowed them the time. Quickly offering them tea, as you glanced at the small set up you and Helion had come to the courtyard to enjoy.

It was only a matter of moments before more furniture was erected and began the awkward silence while the piping pot of tea began to simmer to a cool.

Your hands were scrunched up in your skirt, fists full of fabric on your lap being an obvious tell of unease to those who knew what to look for. A strained smile was forced to your lips, expression light and brows arched in apprehension as you watched the uninvited guests silently take sips of tea. 

With a quick sideways glance you gave Helion a nervous smile, your lips wobbling as you took a sharp inhale. Helion responded with a gentle pat of your head, his large hand coming to ruffle your hair while a lazy smiled adorned his lips.

His energy finally shifting to one you recognised more, warm and teasing. He was relaxed again. Whatever shock the inner circle had originally caused, Helion now seemed...somewhat nonchalant.

That should have been reassuring, but the tension in your muscles didn't want to relax.

“This is y/n,” Helion finally spoke, addressing the people who had barged into his court. 

At the revelation of a name, the inner circle cast their attention solely on you. 

“These are my friends y/n, I’ve told you about them already. We had anticipated your arrival at some point,” he continued giving a knowing look to Rhys.

Your eyes scanned the expressions of the five people in front of you. 

Rhys, Amren, Nesta, Elain and of course Azriel. Not the whole inner circle, no there were members missing. But Helion had done such a great job at explaining them to you, that it really wasn’t difficult to figure out who was who.

“It’s l-lovely to meet you all,” you managed out, voice falling softer than you had hoped. Your own eyes gently moving across them all before flitting to the shadowy presence that remained stood behind the Night Courts High Lord. 

Azriel.

Spymaster and Shadowsinger of the Night Court.

You couldn’t seem to stop yourself from looking, among all the noise he sung the sweetest. His energy, amongst those swirling smoke coloured tendrils was the most beautiful display you had ever seen. Not the most powerful by any means, Rhysand and Helion’s outshone his aura in many ways but his was the most enticing— at least to you.

Composure wasn’t something Azriel usually lacked, but after hearing the softness of your voice fill the warm evening air he had to collect himself entirely.

From the moment he’d set his eyes on you, he couldn’t ignore the feeling in the depths of his chest. Maybe if you hadn’t been the cause of it, he’d have assumed there was something wrong with his heart. 

Azriel noticed the way your fingers nervously picked at your skirt, fists tight with the material as you sat up straight beside Helion. As if your posture would bring a confidence you were clearly lacking. 

He could sense it, your unease, nervousness. Picked up on it before even his shadows could whisper it to him.

Nervous, nervous, nervous.

He blinked them away. He already knew. 

Pretty. 

Another whispered. He already knew that too.

Pretty was putting it plainly though. You were breathtaking. 

Azriel wanted to reassure you. Comfort the anxiety he could tell you were drowning in. It was such a strange sensation, to feel this connection so deeply with someone he’d never met before, that Azriel couldn’t help but question why.

Azriel allowed himself to consider that perhaps something he’d been dreaming of for so long was finally his. 

That feeling, the ache in his chest you caused— was almost painfully lovely. He swore this was exactly how his brothers had described it to him.

Azriel found himself allowing the smallest curve spread to the edge of his lips, a gentle, secret smile. Just for you.

A smile that softened your own forced expression to something more relaxed and genuine. 

For a moment it felt as though it was just you two. The noise and vibrations of everyone else seemed to fade. An embrace of cobalt and hazel filling you with a warmth that felt so familiar.

“But Elain is correct. Y/n is cauldron-born.” Helion’s voice broke the trance you both seemed to be in.

Your nervousness from before simmering hotter.

“It cannot be,” Amren declared, disbelief tinging her tone as her gaze pierced into you.

“You think I lie?” Helion challenged. 

“How do you know for sure?” Rhys pressed back, an uncertainty in his tone.

“Because I know you all feel it too,” Helion’s voice was deep, a gleam in his eye as he turned to you proudly.

“She is the Mother’s daughter.” 

A statement. Even more bold than Elain’s settled a silence across the courtyard. This time it wasn’t stifling, their energy shifting to something of awe, admiration and then devotion.

In one quick movement a figure dropped to their knees. Head pressing to the cool stone ground.

Amren had bowed before your feet. 

And Amren bowed to no one.

a/n: Okay I know this a whole lot more of elusive-ness and I'm sorry, I just thought sharing this little bit more is better than nothing at all. I wanted to flesh this first out properly so here's the full part one! I've been so swamped with work and inspiration struck this evening so I quickly wrote this in my notes. I promise I will eventually finish it, even if it's just little updates here and there. I'm hoping maybe 2 more parts, so it'll be a nice little mini-series!

I also took it upon myself to try and tag everyone who commented and reblogged because you all seemed very invested so didn't want you to miss this installment even if it is tiny<3

Forever tags: @sleepylunarwolf @daily-dose-of-sass @alittlelostalittlefound-blog @milswrites @amberlynn98 @marscardigan @illyrianbitch @lilah-asteria

CB tags: @hannzoaks @je-suis-prest-rachel @awkardnerd @cleverzonkwombatsludge @faerieboismh @glitterypirateduck @paradisebabey @jesskidding3 @searchingforbucky @beardburnsupersoldiers @chubby-unicornz @toxicsociety17-blog g @sapphenaa @starsidesigh @kalistaangelsbane @bookishthoughtss @pit-and-the-pen

[acourtofmishapandmistakes]

Soothing Steam

Azriel & Reader as Parents

Word Count: 999

Summary: When your new babe struggles to sleep through the night, you finally resort to taking a hot shower with your babe. Azriel joins you later on to help with soothing.

Content Warning: Nothing sexual, just fluff, but mention of nudity.

For the past half hour, you had been pacing through the townhouse, your baby wailing incessantly in your arms. You had tried everything: a tighter swaddle, rocking, feeding, singing—nothing seemed to help. If anything, her cries had only intensified. Looking down at her little face, you took a deep breath, struggling to keep your frustration in check. 

Exhausted from the relentless crying, you decided it was time to pull out all the stops. You made your way to the bathroom and turned on the shower, recalling how the mix of soothing sounds, hot water, and your body heat had calmed your baby after a particularly messy diaper incident. You quickly stripped, wrestling with your little one's flailing arms and taking care not to disturb her delicate wings. Carefully, you pressed her against your chest and stepped under the spray, letting the warm water hit your back first. As you gently bounced her, the intensity of her screams began to lessen.

You exhaled deeply as the screams subsided into soft gurgles and babbling sounds. Humming gently, you hoped the vibrations from your chest would lull her back to sleep. Just then, Azriel peeked into the steam-filled bathroom. His hair was tousled from sleep, and dressed in just his underwear and t-shirt, he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. Seeing you with the baby, he offered a knowing smile. As you continued to gently bounce and rock your little one, you returned his smile, a wave of exhaustion washing over you. 

Azriel wandered over, easing the glass shower door open to run his hand gently over the back of your baby's head.

"I can take over," he offered.

You managed a tired smile. "You were up with her just an hour ago, it’s okay."

His eyes remained fixed on your little one. "Do you think she’s sick? She’s not usually this fussy."

"I’m not sure," you replied, continuing to bounce her. "There’s no cough, no fever."

He pondered for a moment. "Maybe the steam from the shower is soothing her."

"Maybe," you conceded, brushing damp hair from your face and tracing your finger soothingly up and down your baby’s back. "It could just be the warmth and the sound that’s comforting her."

Your little one fussed in your arms, letting out a soft whine before it escalated into a wail. "Oh no," you murmured, quickening the pace of your rocking.

Without a word, Azriel pulled his shirt over his head, stripped down, and joined you in the shower, closing the glass door behind him. He wrapped his arms around both of you, allowing your baby to nestle between your bodies. He rested his chin on your head and swayed gently from side to side as you shushed your baby's cries.

Feeling her father's presence against her back seemed to calm her slightly; her whimpers softened and she began to close her eyes.

"When was the last time you fed her?" Azriel whispered, his hands drawing soothing lines along your back.

"About fifteen minutes ago, but she wasn't interested," you replied, gently kissing the top of her head as you continued to sway together in the warm embrace of the shower.

"Do you want to take her to Madja tomorrow? Just to get her checked. Even if it's just sleep regression, it couldn't hurt," Azriel suggested.

You looked down at your babe, nestled between your chest and Azriel's, her tiny pink lips parting softly as she breathed, finally seeming to drift to sleep.

"Maybe," you murmured after a moment.

Azriel reached behind and turned off the water, then pulled a warm towel from above the shower to wrap around you and your daughter. She let out a soft groan but remained asleep. Azriel hugged both of you again, planting a gentle kiss on your forehead as you leaned against his shoulder.

"You’re a wonderful mother," he whispered.

You scoffed lightly, "I wish I knew what to do."

"You're doing everything you can. We both are. She’s just an enigma."

You chuckled, letting him towel-dry your hair. "I thought they weren’t supposed to be this complicated until they were at least fifty."

"I think it’s funny that you thought, with me as a dad and you as her mom, we wouldn’t end up with a moody, complicated little one."

You looked up at him, noticing how the water traced paths down his broad shoulders and chest. He was stunning—the most beautiful creature you had ever seen, and he was all yours. Together, you had created the most incredible little being, with your eyes and Azriel’s black hair, now just beginning to grow in. You carefully dabbed the towel on her tiny, damp curls that seemed to curl even more when wet.

Azriel slid open the shower door and steadied you as you stepped out. He quickly dried off and slipped back into his shirt and shorts, while you gently patted your babe dry. Once dressed, he extended his arms toward her. “Here, let me take her so you can get dressed.” You handed her over, and although she squirmed a bit, she remained asleep in her father’s arms. Azriel swayed gently, bringing his nose close to breathe in her scent—a beautiful mix of both of you that you both loved.

While you dried off, Azriel walked back to your shared bedroom. By the time you were dressed and followed him, you found Azriel lying in bed, your daughter resting on his chest. Her tiny arms and legs splayed out, gripping his shirt. Azriel’s hands were lazily draped over her back, his lips slightly parted. In sleep, father and daughter had never looked more alike.

You approached the bed, gently moving his hands so you could pick her up. Carrying her to your side of the bed, you placed her in her bassinet. She stirred slightly but settled quickly into the soft bedding. You traced a finger down her chubby cheek, then allowed Azriel’s shadows to spin softly above her, creating a makeshift mobile.

[bloodycassian]

To be Wed -

Azriel x Reader x Rhysand - NSFW/MDNI 18+ 18+ 18+

Plot - Reader is caught stealing and is being punished in town square when Rhys comes in. He however has another motive, aside from being a sympathetic high lord. 

THEMES/WARNINGS - knotting/different shaped Illyrian dicks. Breeding kink (kind of - not mentioned in scene.). ‘Forced’ sex due to circumstance. Voyeur. Cuckholding. Shadow play. Slight anal. Rough sex. Bondage. Public humiliation(slightly). Multiple POV. P IN V. Oral. Body worship. Possible themes of CNC? 

Please do not read if you are easily triggered by any of these themes or anything remotely close - make good choices :) skip to ++++++++ for just the naughty bits.

NSFW - 18+ , MDNI

This is my Court. Rhys told himself that over, and over again. He had to be stable to rule. His people relied upon it. Azriel had even noticed his wavering anger and had suggested this. This was for his court.

This was for his pleasure, as well. He fucked into the mouth of the whore he’d hired, and tossed her aside when he couldn’t finish. He needed more, something to get his mind away from the demands of politics and what an open ended rule he had. Something to get his mind off the words Azriel had said. 

“A king without heir is what every opponent wishes for. Perhaps it is time-”

Azriel had shut his mouth after Rhys’s snarl. He wouldn’t go about impregnating females just for his lineage. Just to remain in control of his Court. Truthfully, he wasn’t sure if he could have children. After more than a few mishandled one night stands, there’d never been a bastard born prince. 

But had Azriel been right? Was it time to try for an heir? Even if it wasn’t with a mate or even a dedicated partner? He’d house the female and take good care of her, surely. His heir would need to be strong, after all. The idea entertained him for longer than he’d like, as he paid the female and dismissed her. His cock was barely hard, still covered in her saliva. He grimaced. 

+

On his walk back to his townhome, Rhys passed the shops, hiding his face from passersby. Some still noticed him. One of them, the punisher on the corner. He tried to slide away, but the male caught him before he could disappear into the crowd. 

“Ah, the high lord himself, here to make an example of those whos intentions are against his Court!” The male announced, earning applause from the surrounding crowd. 

Rhys lifted his gaze, waving with a pressed smile. When he spied the male on the raised platform, then looked towards the headstalls to his side, Rhys breath was knocked from him. 

His cock surged immediately. A perfect, gorgeous body lay trapped here, craning her neck to look at him. Her hair was a mess, her cheeks rosy and bitten from the cold. Her dress was not nearly long enough for this weather, and a part of Rhys roared at that. In both arousal, and outrage that this male would have her up there-

He was at the podium before he realized, rage lacing his words. “Release her. Now.” His command was final, and the round male only gave him a confused look. 

He gestured to her with a paddle. “She was caught stealing-”

“You defy your high lord?” Rhys’s mind-voice broke through the thin walls of his shields, and the male flinched, startled. 

She was unbound from the headstock in just a few seconds. He took her by the elbow, and brought her before the crowd. “There’s been a misunderstanding. She was merely acting as a thief, so we could be sure our loyal city guards were following their orders.” He announced, smiling brightly towards the male with the paddle. The urge to rip into his flesh was astounding. 

“Thanks to our watchful security, we’re keeping Velaris safe. Thank you all!” He called, waving for a moment longer. He dared a glance to the red faced female at his side, noting her shimmering eyes and the way she stared at him. Gods those lips, the mouth half open in utter befuddlement - he tore them away into a shadow before the crowd could notice the growing bulge in his trousers. 

She fell onto the floor the moment they landed in his townhome, gasping for breath and steadying herself before standing. “What- the-” She panted, pushing herself to her hands and knees. 

Rhys barely resisted the urge to fold that dress over and take a long look at what he’d brought into his home. To taste what he had imagined on that stage. His hands balled into fists for a moment, his nails biting into the flesh before he helped her up. 

“This is the wife you find yourself, Rhys?” Az made his presence known in the doorway, earning a low growl from Rhys. 

“Wife?!” She squeaked, her voice breaking slightly. She stepped away, knocking into the couch and nearly stumbling over again. 

“Forgive him. Im sorry-” Rhys glared towards Azriel, then took her hand. The shadowsinger grinned, and chewed on another piece of apple while he watched the exchange. “I- my mind is a bit lost at the moment.”

“Clearly.” She snorted. “A high lord’s wife wouldn’t be strung up in the center of town for stealing. Your type are called Rulers for that. Royals.” 

Azriel laughed, loud and surprised. “Maybe you should propose, Rhys. She’ll set you straight.”

“We try not to rule in that way.” Rhys muttered. “What were you stealing?”

“Clothes.”

“Do you need clothes?” Rhys took another glance at the exquisite dress she wore, wanting to admire it at the same time as rip it off of her. 

She shied, her hands going to cross over her chest. “I dont see why that’s important.” She answered. 

“Because he’s looking for a surrogate, of sorts. Someone to birth his children.” Azriel answered quickly, ignoring the deathly look Rhys shot at him. 

She flinched, and unfolded her arms, revealing a sliver of a knife in her hand. 

“You’d be well paid. Taken care of. You and the child both, for the rest of your days.” Azriel barreled on, pushing off the wall and going to join Rhys. He bumped the male with his shoulder, and took a breath, scenting her. “And, if you’d like-” Azriel lowered his voice, stepping closer to her, despite the knife. He leaned in, closer and closer until he hovered just over her ear.

“You’d be able to have more than just him.”

Her breath hitched. The knife clattered to the floor, and Azriel’s huff of a laugh ghosted over her ear. 

++++++++++++

“Is there a contract for this or is it just your word?” You asked skeptically. 

Rhys reluctantly looked to Azriel, assuming the male had this planned for much longer than Rhys realized. The male snapped and a pen and paper appeared on the desk you sat adjacent to. Rhys groaned. 

Azriel had had this planned for much, much longer than Rhys had given him credit for. 

“This agreement will span your lifetime, and the lifetime of the potential heir should they remain loyal to the Court. Should you or the child abandon the Night Court, it will be nullified.” Azriel explained briefly.

You weighed the words, bewildered still at how quickly your day had turned around. 

“You don’t have to make a choice now.” Rhys said. But if you denied them, where would that leave you? To be begging and making your money on the streets again? Stealing had been a fine trade, but now because of the High Lord’s announcement, there would be no way any other smugglers or traders would make business with you again. 

“I’ll do it.”

“Thank the Mother-” Azriel blew out in a breath.

“I think you should think about this more.” Rhys argued at the same time.

“There’s nothing to think about. I bare your children and I receive a life that I’ve been struggling for since I was a child. I am ready for that life to begin.” 

You didn’t care if it was reckless or stupid or outright dangerous. You’d done worse for less. Having a guaranteed way to wealth and power with bearing a High Lord’s heir was the gift you’d been waiting for over two centuries for. 

You picked up the quill and signed your name. A dull throbbing erupted along your collarbone, and you pulled back the thin part of your dress to see whirling ink there. “A deal made in truth.” Rhys nodded slowly, and stood from the end of the bed. Azriel seemed to melt into the background as the high lord of the night court approached you, heat flaring from him as he neared. Was he sick? Your eyes darted to his hands, where they rolled into fists at his sides. 

Slowly, a tingling in stomach grew stronger. Searing down from your collarbone, into the pit of your stomach, it grew. You rubbed your thighs together in your seat, embarrassed of the scent that you knew was rolling off of you in waves. 

As soon as he was close enough to smell it, Rhys was on his knees before you. He gripped your knees and pulled them apart, sending sparks up your spine and forcing your arousal to a nearly painful peak. You panted, curling inward trying to protect yourself from the male you hardly knew. 

His hand pressed against your chest, gently holding you back as his other hand slipped between your thighs, his fingers dragging over the wetness he found there. A low growl reverberated in his throat. “A deal has been struck.” He said, lifting his chin to watch you as he flicked a finger over your clit. 

A jolt of hot, spiked pleasure had you rolling your hips into his hand, wishing you had some kind of power here. Some way to manipulate him just as he was doing to you. You glanced to Azriel, who’d practically made himself invisible in a corner. 

Rhys caught the look, and followed your eyes. “Is that what you want?” He hummed, his finger circling you slowly, before dipping down to your entrance, prodding there lightly. You couldn’t help but nod, your throat suddenly dry. 

Rhys hummed again, and withdrew his hand from your dress. He hauled you up from the chair by your elbow, and brought you to the edge of the bed where he’d been sitting. He knocked your knees apart and guided you lean over, so your chest and head were supported by the bed. So vulnerable like this, so… deliciously at his will. He must have sensed your spike in arousal, because there was a weight that covered your wrists and neck then - just like the pillory in the courtyard had been like. 

“Is that why you picked me?” You questioned, voice rough with dryness.

He stepped away, and you half expected him to bring a paddle down on you. A new rush of desire coursed through your cunt, making you a quivering, wet mess. The anticipation for it, for anything had you arching, wanting - needing so badly. The coldness made your body ache for someone to touch. You nearly pushed yourself up from the bed, but then there was a set of hands on your lower back, tender hands grazing over you there. 

Then Rhysand appeared before you on the bed. Your stomach dipped and rolled, surprise rippling through you. Azriel’s cold shadows licked up your shins, wrapped around your immobilized forearms and locked them in place. “Fuck-” You panted, shooting Rhysand a curious - and likely, panicked - look as he watched, eyes dark and hooded while Azriel knelt behind you. 

His tongue was immaculate. Your legs nearly gave out at the first stroke, but you resorted to arching, rocking back as much as you could to get him just as you wanted him. He gripped your ass tight in his palms, leaving red marks when he occasionally slapped there. You hadn’t been so fucking desprate for something before. So aching for something inside of you. 

All the while, Rhysand watched. He flexed, gripping his cock tight and watched, nearly unblinking as Azriel feasted upon you from behind. The tip of him grew wet quickly, and he used it to wetten the rest of his shaft, from the soft pointed tip to the slight bump near the base where the tie was. 

You’d never been fucked by an Illyrian before, let alone two. Your mind went fuzzy at thought of it. There’d always been rumors about how good of a fuck an Illyrian was, but to see the size of them in person… A delicious shudder rolled through you.

A finger dipped inside of you with brutal efficiency, curling and drawing the breath from you. Rhys’s chin tipped up, and he bit his lip. His eyes were keenly focused on Azriel, on the way the male move and lapped at you while he stretched you open with another finger. 

You moaned, and moaned as the shadowsinger brought you to near completion, then stopped. You nearly stomped your feet. Your body arched and practically pleaded for him to continue. He removed his fingers gently, then slapped his soaked hand across your ass. “Nice and fucking ready.” He hummed, voice husky and filled with the promise of brutal pleasure.

+

Rhys pulled the shadow of night over himself, and was behind her in an instant. Azriel had done good, better than Rhys would have done if he’d had the job. He wouldn’t have been able to last as long without delving into his own needs. 

His hands ghosted over the perfect ass before him, admiring for a moment. Then Azriel was gripping his cock, pumping a few times. Rhys’s hands bit into her skin, earning a delectable cry that had his cock twitching in Az’s hand. A lick of his fingers and Azriel had his cock soaked with saliva, all the way to the base where the bulging roundness was growing quickly. 

“Eager.” Azriel said with a grin. 

Rhys didn’t have a moment to bear his teeth at the male. He was gone, then appeared again, fully nude on the bed where Rhys had been. The sight of the shadowsinger’s own reddened, growing knot was enough to send another spurt of precum from the high lord. 

He slid in with ease, groaning at the heat, the grip that surrounded him. His toes curled, popping loudly. He tugged on the back of the dress, using it as a handle of sorts to pull her back onto him. Quick, efficient thrusts have him bottoming out, her slickened entrance coating the start of his knot already. His mouth waters at the sight of your bodies slamming together. The sound it makes. He stared down at the way your lips gripped him, enjoying the look of the wetness from both your bodies there.

He panted, nearly ashamed at how much he needed this. He spared a glance to Azriel, at the way the male’s smug gaze took in the entire scene before him. As if to say ‘tell me I’m right.’ in challenge to the pleasure coursing through Rhys’s veins.

His knot was beginning to catch, and he leaned forward, taking a breast into her hand and pulling. He’d have to work her open more, and quickly. He wouldn’t last much longer. He swore at himself, then vowed to make the next time last. He put a foot up near her head, arching over her to get the angle that would have him hammering into her. The moans grew louder, almost frantic. Her muscles flexed and he nearly came at the intense squeezing that her pussy gave him. 

“Not yet-” He grunted, placing wet kisses at her ear. He fucked into her quickly, thrusting hard and fast until he felt his knot beginning to catch more, then he nearly stilled. He drew a calming breath, and pressed - more and more until a hiss came from her lips. He pulled out, then pressed in again, and again until the sweet, all consuming heat covered his knot. 

“Fuck-” He ground out in a long breath. She was silent, eyes wide and gasping, hands grabbing for the sheets - for anything as her muscles began to quiver. A deep satisfaction took him, made him prideful that he had such a gorgeous female coming on him. He rolled his hips forward, inching in more and more - filling and stretching the pussy that clamped down on him. 

Then he was cumming, spilling deep inside her. Her walls milked him, her own orgasm making her legs tremble and nearly collapse. The pull on his cock made the weakness known, and he helped hold her up by the hips. He shuddered and panted, pressing kisses to her shoulder, her hair - anywhere he could reach. 

+

The swelling of his knot was exquisite. The tapered bulge of it fitting easily into your body, as if you were molded for him. And your desire had turned from molten and eating you alive, into a manageable flame with him bottoming out inside you. More than that alone, it was something sent from a god. Intoxicating. Mind blowing. It was a stretch that made words impossible, that made your orgasm nearly instant from the pressure of it. You weren’t sure how many times you’d cum around him by the time he was pulling out. 

Wetness dripped from your hole. It dripped down your thighs and to the floor, and embarrassment would have coated you, if it weren’t for the desire still thrumming hot in your veins. With Rhysand pulling free from your grip, your body was at a loss. Greedy for more. 

“She’s ready.” Rhys said, voice raspy. Your mind was slow to pick up on the fact that the two Illyrians had traded places once again. 

“I thought-” You began, voice hoarse from dryness and moaning.

“You don’t want more?” Azriel asked, and he sounded genuinely confused. 

A strange sound came from your throat, and your body arched back to him. “I do.. But the contract..” 

His cock was inside you in the next breath, forcing any of your questions out of your mind. All that was left was the need, the overpowering heat that roared inside you. You pushed back to it, eager to take the male. 

“An Heir of the night court, and anyone else you’d desire.” Azriel panted in your ear, taking you with slower, more grinding thrusts than Rhysand had. With the slickness of Rhysand’s cum and your own juices already coating you, he slipped into the pace he desired easily. “From how fucking soaked you are for me I’d say you desire me as well.”

Denying it would have been an outright lie. How could anyone not want the shadowsinger? You hummed, spreading your feet farther apart. Azriel was slightly shorter than the high lord, but not by much. The size difference was mostly in their cocks. Even with Rhysand fucking you first, breaking you open, Azriel was still a stretch. His cock rammed into that spot inside you with ease, flicking over it with every thrust. 

Your hands clawed at the foot of the bed - not sure if you should cum or not, because he was getting you there quickly. His easy pace was offset with the roughness of each stroke, of how much more solid he seemed than the high lord. 

The high lord who now groaned as a shadow pleasured him. Your eyes fluttered closed, trying your hardest not to come undone. Azriel’s laugh at your ear had you tightening on him, earning wet sounds from where your bodies connected. “You like that, how I play with these?” His shadows drifted up your ankles and shins, crawling extra slowly up your thighs until they reached the point where he connected with you. 

“They serve you, too. Just as I do.” He said it in a voice that would have you wet instantly, in any other situation. But it was laced with deeper meaning. To serve you. To serve you as what, exactly? As your own pleasure-keeper? 

A shocked gasp left you as one of the tendrils of shadow circled your other hole. Your body went taut, arching back and nearly knocking him from your pussy. “Easy-” He crooned, his voice sweet in your ear. The sensitivity was outrageous, an entirely new experience for you. It had brought you back though, to a height where you weren’t nearly on the precipice of orgasm. Your eyes watered with the stimulation, with how much pleasure the shadow brought. He slipped back inside you with ease, pressing in deep - letting you feel the way his tie was growing. The bulb there much larger than Rhysand’s had been. 

The shadow circling your ass did not relent, but your body grew accustomed to it’s pressure in time with Azriel’s thrusts. You could tell it was growing larger though, from a small finger’s size to the blunt end of a smaller cock, it nudged at you. You were practically purring, content with the easy way your pleasure grew with each thrust when he pressed deep, pushing his growing knot inside you a few times. 

A hum of approval rang from Rhys, who now you noticed was bound by the shadows just as much as you were. His hands were locked to his ankles behind him while he was propped on his knees, that shadow making a mess of him while he dribbled pre come and watched Azriel fuck you. The sight of him - of the high lord bound to Azriel’s wishes made something deep in the pit of your stomach turn from content to ravenous. 

Your walls squeezed him, urging him to fuck you faster, deeper - whatever he wanted - whatever he wanted. 

Gods, that was what he wanted. He wanted Rhysand like that, to urge you on. To not only see something he liked watching, but to see if you also liked it. Pleasure-keeper indeed.

You rolled back to Azriel as much as you could, nudging that shadow into your hole slightly. You cried out, but He was pushing into you, forcing you down, down. His weight suddenly forcing you to the floor. Your hands still bound, you could do nothing but brace for the impact of your knees against the stone floor, but it never happened. The shadows gripped around your thighs, pulling them apart and holding you there, only a few inches above the floor.

The shadowsinger followed you the whole way down, the move planned and wicked. Heat pumped through you with the adrenaline, taking your arousal back to nearly the edge of the peak yet again. 

His knot slid in, this time with much more resistance. “Such a fucking dirty thing aren’t you?” He said, gripping your throat in one hand and forcing you to look up, to watch as his shadows milked Rhysand. 

The shadow at your hole left, no longer able to press into you with the new positioning. As much as you missed it, the stretch that Azriel’s knot was providing more than made up for the loss. He fucked into you with determination now, the width of his knot slipping in and out of your entrance with ease. He was just under the size Rhys had been when he’d locked inside of you, and still seemed to have more to give. 

“Gods, you’re tight. Rhys didn’t do a good enough job breaking you in, did he?” He ground out, placing bite marks upon your shoulders. One of his hands pressed against your hip, supporting you with every snap of his hips forward. He leaned down slightly, arching over your back and raising up from his knees a bit, then buried himself in you at a brutal pace. 

A cry fell from your lips at the intensity of it, at the way he seemed to know exactly what to do, where to press- You were coming undone. There was no stopping it, no way to rock or buck against him differently-

His knot swelled, catching on your lips- rubbing between them until he could no longer pull free. Your pussy sealed around him fully, covering him in your tight heat. You came, and came - knees quivering as he locked inside you. The world was nothing but heat and the crest of your pleasure and the fullness that Azriel provided for your pussy to ride out your orgasm with. 

Rhys was groaning - whimpering, really, and the shadows writhed around him in such a mass that it was almost concerning. They’d allowed him some movement, so he could fuck them as he pleased, but within a few strokes, thick white cum shot from his cock. He hissed as he came, his body flexing and rolling with the orgasm. 

Then, with a stuttering motion of his hips, Azriel was cumming as well. He collapsed atop you, his orgasm ripped from as your insides pressed on him, taking him for all he was able to provide. He panted, eyes blown wide, his nails leaving deep red crescents where he’d been gripping your hips. He filled you, cum leaking out even around the seal his knot had made. 

The only thing he wished was for another body, so he may lick it from you. So he may lap at your clit while still seated inside, to feel how you’d react to such a thing-

Gods his cock was growing hard again just from the thought. No, no- he denied himself of it. He’d have plenty of time, in the future. He took steadying breaths and instead played with your hair,fixing how he’d mussed it and planting kisses along where he’d bitten.

He was unable to move for long, long moments. Not until Rhys broke his mental blankness to laugh - “I think I’ve made a good choice of heir-provider.”

[acourtofinkandpapyrus]

Master List!

Requests are open! The only line (for now) I really draw is nothing noncon or dubcon!

Remember to read the warnings

Smut will have this by it: *

suggestions open

_____

Azriel:

Series:

My Little Shadow (finished): Part one, Part two, Part three, Part four, Part five, Part six, Part seven, Part eight, Part nine, Part ten, Part eleven, Part twelve, Part thirteen, Part Fourteen, Epilogue/Part fifteen*

One shots:

A Dance of Death: here

_____

Eris:

Series: A Flower With Petals of Flame: Part one Part two Part three Part four Part five Part six Part seven Part eight Part nine Part ten Part eleven part twelve Part thirteen Part fourteen Part fifteen Part sixteen Part seventeen Part eighteen Part nineteen An announcement

One shots:

Confessions*: here

Will you be mine?: here

_____

Morrigan:

Late Night Comfort: Here

_____

Rhysand:

Series: Shallow Waters

_____

Headcanons: here

[lanitalay]

Before I Say Goodnight

Chapter 7

a/n Hiiiii, new chapter yay. Last post I got a request for a tag list, let me know if you're interested in something like that! Also, I'm going to try to keep up the writing schedule I have now so you can expect new chapters every 2-3 days.

word count: 2.5k

Warnings: mentions of a knife and throw up

Other chapters

Hot, humid breath fans the back of your neck as someone or something holds you tight. You struggle against the restraint to no avail. Whatever is holding you has canines that nick and poke at the back of your head. You stiffen as you feel hot liquid rolling down your back, unsure if it's sweat or blood. You’re being pushed and dragged by this monster. It’s a familiar forest, a universe away. Claws press into your hips and you cry out as you feel them press through skin and scrape against bone. You wake mid gasp. Nightmare. That was just a nightmare. It had been a while since you thought of that forest. It was a trap. You had no proof but also no doubt. The lack of light seeping through the curtains let you know it is way too early to start your day. So you focus on breathing hoping sleep takes over soon. 

When you went to breakfast the next morning you were relieved to find the dining room empty. After last night you didn’t know how to interact with Azriel, having told him things that not even your closest friends from home know. So you eat in silence and try to forget about last night, the nightmare and the dread that threatened to spill over whenever you were undistracted for longer than fifteen minutes. 

When you walked into the library Gwyn approached you immediately “Y/n! I’m so glad you are back, yesterday we found something and waiting to tell you has been tortuous” blood drains from your face and you swear your heart stops for a few beats. “What do you mean?” She walks over to a table with at least twenty books sprawled across it. “There is this book that talks about opening portals with a series of symbols, they are extremely intricate and the portal working depends on making the symbols perfectly but it’s totally doable. Then in this book there is a description of different realms that have been accessed by these portals. So, in theory we would just need to figure out which symbols lead to your realm” she finishes and looks at you with the biggest smile you’ve ever seen on a face. “I… that’s incredible Gwyn, thank you”. You are terrified to get excited about the news. If it doesn’t work… But if it does then that means a way home. “Don’t thank us yet, we still have to figure out the combinations for your realm but I think it should be done by the end of the week”. Jesus, that’s soon. You spend the rest of the day in a daze, fetching books, picturing your life back home and coming up with explanations for your absence. 

By the time dinner rolls around you are starved. “Oh, hi” Azriel half smiles at you “hello, y/n”. You sit in your usual seat across from him, “I’m starving”, fill your plate and begin eating. “How was your day?” You pause your chewing and look at his eyes for the first time since last night “oh, it was alright” you take a sip of water “Gwyn told me that they found something on portals, I could be going home in a few days”. Telling Azriel you’re leaving was hard, goodbye suddenly on the horizon. He takes a few beats to reply “are you happy to be going back?” Right now, you are regretting everything you told him last night. You take a bite and nod. He continues, trying to fill the silence “I’m not surprised Gwyn found a solution so fast. She’s one of the most talented researchers in the library” you nod again. It was true, Gwyn was brilliant, but you didn't appreciate the jealousy that flashed through your chest. That’s something to unpack later. “How was your day?” He looks a little surprised by the question, having accepted that you weren’t in the mood for conversation “it was… productive. Training was good and I got word from one of the spies on the Continent”. You never know what to say when Azriel talks about his position as Spymaster, he didn’t offer details and you didn’t want to pry. You had a feeling that asking too many questions would make you seem suspicious and since you depend on the mercy of the Night Court for food and shelter you thought minding your business was the prudent thing to do. “I haven’t seen Mor in a while, what’s she up to?” His shoulders relax a bit “she’s in the Court of Nightmares for a few days”. Right. The Court of Dreams and Court of Nightmares dichotomy. “And Cassian?” you try to hide the little smirk that will give away your plan to annoy him. “He’s in Windhaven until tomorrow”. He’s so serious. “And Elain?” “Probably at the River House” “And Lucien?” “Somewhere in the human lands, maybe the Spring Court” “and Amren?” “I actually haven’t seen her since last week”. “What about Eris?” He stills. “How do you know Eris?”. His face hardened at the mention of the heir of Autumn. “He came to talk to Lucien at the Manor, I thought I had mentioned it” “you didn’t”. Pivoting, you ask “Nesta?” He runs his hand through his hair “uhm, tonight is girls night so she’s with Gwyn and Emerie getting drunk and gossiping”. That sounds fun. “You know, I meant what I said about teaching you how to use a knife. I could teach you a few self defense techniques before you go” your mind goes to the knife you’re still keeping in your boot “I’d really appreciate that, Azriel. I’m so tired of being easy prey, I wanna be able to put up a fight”. “Great, meet me here at dawn” he gets up “sleep well” and walks away. Dawn? 

You’re tired, but there's too much on your mind. So after dinner you find yourself  at the library where Nesta keeps all of her romances. “I swear Cassian steals my novels and uses the smut as inspiration” their three distinct laughters fill the room. You chuckle as Emerie goes to pour herself wine but Nesta snatches the bottle before and pours a glass for herself. “Do you mind if I crash your girls night?” the Valkyries look at you, not having noticed your presence and you hear an excited “eeek” as Gwyn tackles you. “Beautiful y/n of course you can join us! Here, have some wine” she hands you a glass that’s full to the brim and you take a few healthy sips “we were gossiping about the boys”. Nesta raises her eyebrows “y/n, be careful with that wine, it’s not meant for humans” you gulp. “Oh god, what’s gonna happen to me?” Nesta laughs “nothing, it’s just really strong. Anyway, he thinks I don't notice but last night he basically played out the bath scene from that novel we read last week” all of you giggle “lucky girl” Emerie teases. “What about you, y/n? Any good gossip to share with the group?” You sip the wine, already feeling light headed “not really”. Nesta’s eyes glitter with something you can’t quite place as she says “has anything happened with Azriel?” she wiggles her brows and you choke. Seeing her this playful is unusual and the idea about you and Azriel is so absurd “no, he’s just been a friend” “I’m sure he wants to be more than that…” you shake your head, sipping more wine. “Not even one kiss?” Emerie asks “not even a hug” she frowns “bummer”. You feel pressured to tell them something interesting so you say “you didn’t hear it from me, but I think there’s something going on with Vassa and Jurian”. The hours fly by between the wine, the stories and the speculating. It is almost dawn when you knock on Azriel’s door. 

“Y/n?” his sleep laced voice echoes in the hallway.  You hiccup “Azriel there is no way I can train with you”. “You joined girls night” he states “you spied on us?” He crosses his arms across his chest “it’s my job”. “You are just nosy,” he yawns, “can I help you with something?” “I’ve been keeping a secret,” you whisper. The dim hallway conceals the way his face pales at your confession “what do you mean?” You look around, double checking nobody else is here and step closer to him. He’s tall, much taller than you so you grab his shirt and he leans forward to meet you at eye level. He’s pale and stiff as a board as you move your face closer to his, until your lips are just about to touch his ears and in the softest voice he’s ever heard say “I think it was a trap”. He pulls away slightly to look at your face, maybe you’re messing with him. But the worry pouring from your eyes lets him know you are not joking. “I think whoever opened the portal used me to test it out”. He’s wide awake now and your eyes are droopy. “Why do you think that?” You yawn and rub your eyes. “I need to get to bed” he grabs your forearm and asks again “y/n, why do you think that?” Your eyes are basically closing themselves and you mumble “cause, there were no sounds and-” another yawn cuts you off. Azriel straightens up and leads you to your room, he’ll ask more questions tomorrow. He pulls the covers from your bed and you collapse on top of all the decorative pillows. Azriel places the covers over you and lets you sleep. 

You feel the pounding in your head before you even open your eyes. After a few minutes you open your eyes and close them again. A couple of more minutes you open them again. It takes a moment to build up the courage to move to a sitting position. Once you do, your gut flips and you bolt to the bathing room, emptying the contents of your stomach. Cold sweat coats your forehead and your back. You sigh, defeated. Slowly, you splash your face with cold water and return to your bed but stop when you see something on your bedside table.  A note, a smokey looking beverage, bread and butter. You pick up the note and admire the precise calligraphy “Drink this tonic for your hangover. The lesson has been moved to after lunch. Meet me on the terrace. Bring the knife. Azriel”. You don’t really remember your conversation from last night but you guess you were drunk enough that Azriel figured you would not be getting up for the lesson. You take a few bites of the bread and sip the concoction and gag at the foul taste. Then, you collapse on the bed, having a few more hours to sleep before your lesson.  

You feel much better when you wake up the second time, managing to tie your hair with a ribbon and putting on your old leggings, a fleece tunic and your boots. When you walk onto the terrace you shiver. The wind lets you know that Autumn has fully set in. “Good morning” the shadow singer greets with a teasing smirk. “Thank you for the provisions” you approach him, rubbing your arms for warmth “maybe we could have the lesson in an ice box, it would be less windy”. “You have to be prepared for the elements, y/n. Where’s the knife?” You pull it from your boot “right here” and wave it around, pretending to attack him. “So, the first thing to know is to not wave it around like that” he’s serious now. I hate when he gets all monotone. “Let’s start by seeing what you would do if you were immobilized”. Fast as lightning he lunges towards you and grabs you, pinning both arms to your sides. You shriek, not expecting that “Azriel this is ridiculous” he doesn’t let up “didn't Lucien drag you across an entire forest while you tried to get away?” You huff “that’s not fair, I would have gotten free but he knocked me against a tree”. “You were too slow, you have to learn to react on instinct. Now, try to get away” you swear he gripped you even tighter. You begin to thrash, trying to headbutt him, biting, scratching, pinching, screaming, but nothing works. Until you begin to kick your legs wildly and knee his groin. He groans and his hold on you falters for a second. You bring your hands to his chest and push him away while ducking. It’s messy but you get away. Until a calloused hand grabs your shoulder and your back meets his chest again only this time there's a blade pressed to your neck. “And then you’re dead” you roll your eyes “I think I did a great job” he lets you go and you immediately miss his warmth “I think we have a lot of work to do”. You stay on the terrace until nightfall and by the end of the lesson you are able to use the knife, more or less.  

You’re walking towards the dining room when Azriel asks “do you remember what you told me last night?” Oh god what did I say? “No, things got hazy half way through Gwyn’s story about some ribbon cutting ceremony… or something to that effect”. He stops walking and lowers his voice “you told me you think the portal was a trap, is that true?” Your throat goes dry and you nod. “I’m sorry I woke you up for that, it’s just a thought I had” he insists “why?” You let out a breath and explain your reasoning. The dead air, the lack of life around the circle, the mist that caged you in and the feeling of being watched. He nods, taking all of it in. You feel embarrassed. He probably thinks I’m crazy. “I’ll contact my spies to see if they’ve seen anything recently” you appreciate it, you really do but you can’t go down this spiral again “can we talk about this tomorrow? I’m starving”. You reach the dining room and are greeted by the smell of food and Nesta and Cassians conversation. “Y/n! Glad to see you on two feet, Nesta was worried you died after last night” you roll your eyes and sit down. “How did you feel today?” Nesta asked “I threw up when I woke up but Azriel left me a drink that helped with the hangover” you pretend you don’t notice Nesta’s raised brows. 

The following morning you return to the library and see Gwyn writing notes in a notebook. “Hi Gwyn”. “Oh, hi y/n.” she doesn’t look up “I’m copying the symbols we think might lead to your realm. If you’d like we can try it out right now, we just need to find an open space and some paint”  A few minutes later she finishes and frowns when she sees your expression “what’s wrong?” “Do you think this could actually work?” She looks unsure “maybe”.

[trrsseea]

Night

pairing: Azriel x reader

warning: non

summary: just fluff my friends

I finally got everything sorted out with Rhys and Cassian and was able to head to the House of Wind. I was looking forward to a bed and a warm bath.

Not that I was looking for a bed, I was used to worse conditions, but after the scuffle with the guards it was a welcome option.

I landed on the upper balcony and soaking wet, I made my way to my bedroom.

As I approached the bedroom, I felt something luring me in. I stopped at the door and peered inside, noticing the open door to the balcony, which allowed the moon to shine into the room and fill it with cool spring breeze that smelled of first flowers of the season.

I quietly crept into the room and approached the spot where Y/n was sitting with a book in hand and in a silk nightgown the colour of the night sky, that didn't even reach her knees. She hadn't noticed me yet, and I wasn't about to change that, lest I startle her.

I slowly loosened the bridle on the shadows and they slowly crept towards Y/n.

They first approached the chair and then crawled up to Y/n, but before they could even touch her, Y/n turned and smiled at me. I always wondered if she could sense them.

Y/n threw her book in the chair and ran over to me. I walked towards her with open arms. When I finally had her in my arms, I squeezed her tightly and inhaled her lavender scent that was so familiar to me.

Before I could say anything, Y/n kissed me. I smiled into the kiss and before I could do anything, Y/n broke the kiss and said: “Az you smell awful, you should take a bath.”

I looked back at her with a grin: “Will you join me?”

Y/n replied with a smile: “No, but I'll wait here for you.”

I kissed her again before letting her out of my arms. Y/n returned to her chair, picked up her book and continued reading.

When I entered the bathroom where a bathtub filled with hot water and a few bottles of unknown contents were already waiting for me. The house always knows what we need.

After two baths when I tried to wash all the dirt off me, I came out of the bathroom wearing only my pants. Y/n was still sitting in the chair with a book in her hands. I quietly walked over to her, leaned down and kissed her on the forehead.

Y/n raised her head and looked at me with a smile: “You smell much better now.” I laughed: “I just smell better?”

Y/n just laughed. Before she could say anything, I bent down to her and picked her up under her knees, she put her arms around my neck not letting the book out of her hand as I lifted her into my arms.

I wanted to take her to bed, but Y/n protested: “I don't want to go to bed yet.”

So, with Y/n in my arms, I settled into the chair, which, even though it was lined with pillows, could accommodate me and my wings.

Y/n set the book down on the coffee table to the left of the chair and snuggled into my arms, cuddling up closer to my bare chest. I inhaled her lavender scent, which always helped me relax.

We both quietly enjoyed each other's company and letting the arms of sleep embrace us.

-------

I felt movement and woke up with a jerk. I quickly opened my eyes and was about to reach for the knife, but realized it was just Y/n in my arms.

I stroked her cheek and kissed her while she slept. Y/n just wiggled, so I gathered her in my arms and headed to the bed.

I carefully laid her down on her side of the bed and covered her up. I walked around the bed and lied down. Slowly, I turned towards Y/n and pulled her into my arms. I wrapped one arm around her stomach and linked the other with hers.

Y/n turned to face me and gave me a tender kiss on the tip of my nose: “Good night.”

I let her scent lull me into dreamland.

[kristeristerin]

HI I SAW U DOING THE ACOTAR TAYLOR THING and i wanred to ask if ud be willing to write an az x reader where shes been under the mountain with the song call it what you want ??? LOVE U THANK U

AN: Ok, this "Drabble" kind of took on a life of it's own and demanded to be a full one shot. Honestly though, I loved your prompt and couldn't tell the story I wanted to in less than 1000 words. Thank you for your suggestion! I hope you like it! As always asks are open for prompts!

Song: Call it what you want

Pairing: Reader X Azriel

Content Warning: None

Words: 2.5k

“Is he safe?” 

Your High Lord turns to you with a raised brow, “Is who safe?” 

“Azri-“ 

Before you’re able to finish the name Rhysand puts a hand over your mouth and wraps the two of you in darkness. Several heartbeats later and the two of you appear in a sparsely decorated bedroom.  He walks to the door and briefly peers into the hallway before turning a cold stare on you.  

“How do you remember him?” He demands, stalking toward you.  

“I- uh” you shrink back, “I don’t understand, what do you mean how do I remember him?” 

Rhysand runs a hand through his hair before looking back at you with wild eyes.  “I removed them all from the memory of everyone from the Court of Nightmares.” 

He takes another step toward you and slams his hand down on the desk beside you, “So again I ask, How. Do. You. Remember. Him?” 

Your forehead creases and you shake your head.  “I don’t know, High Lord.  Maybe it’s because he’s my mate.” 

Suddenly Rhysands eyes widen and he takes a step back from you.  “I’m sorry” he whispers, “ I didn’t know. He hadn’t told me.” 

“We haven’t told anyone,” you reply hesitantly. 

You watch as your High Lord begins pacing back and forth, muttering to himself.  You jump when he abruptly stops in front of you. 

“I should have enough power left to get you out of here, but we’ll have to be careful.  I think I can get you to Velaris though.” 

He reaches for your hand but his eyebrows draw together when you swiftly pull it away.  

“No,” you shake your head.  

“No?” 

You shake your head again, “If he’s safe then I’m where I’m meant to be.” You take a deep breath, “You’ll need someone you can trust, High Lord, and we both know it won’t be anyone else from the Court of Nightmares.” 

“Please,” he offers his hand to you again, “call me Rhysand, and just know that I swear to you I’ll do everything in my power to get us both back to them safely” 

You reluctantly take his hand and when you shake it you gasp at the sensation in your wrist.  Pulling away you see a small tattoo of swirling shadows around your wrist.  

-—————————

Rhysand had only been home for 30 minutes when Azriel came storming into his office.  

“Where is she?” The Shadowsinger demanded. Rhys noted that his usually docile shadows now swirled around him frantically.  

“I believe she returned to the Hewn City,” Rhysand responded carefully, “but Az, you might want to give her some time.  The things that were required of us, of her,” he shuddered.  “They took a toll on her. She’s not going to be the same female you remember.” 

Azriel was silent for a moment before he sank to his knees.  “I don’t care what she had to do, Rhys” He looked up at his brother with tear-filled eyes, “ I just need to see her.  I need to know that she’s ok.” 

Rhysand crossed the room and kneeled next to Azriel.  Without a word, he wrapped his arms around him and held him as he cried.  

———————-

The knock on your apartment door broke you out of your somber thoughts. You stare at your door for a moment hoping whoever is there would just leave, but instead, they knock more persistently a moment later. 

Groaning, you stand up from your couch and trudge to the door. 

“This had better be-” Your words die on your lips when you pull the door open to reveal hazel eyes and tousled black hair that you’d dreamed of for the last 50 years. Your lip quivers and you begin to blink rapidly as you stare up at Azriel. For a long moment, neither of you dare make a sound. 

“Y/N,” he breathes. Reaching forward to cup your cheek. His brow furrows when you shrink back from his touch. 

“Why are you here, Azriel?” you finally ask in a small voice. 

“What do you mean?” he shakes his head, “I’m here for you. I’ve missed you so much.” 

He takes a step forward and you step back further into your apartment, shaking your head. 

“I’m sorry,” you whisper, “you shouldn’t have come.” 

You try to shut the door, but he puts his hand in the way. 

“Don’t do this,” he pleads. “Don’t shut me out. I can’t imagine what you’ve gone through, but please let me help you. You don’t have to do this alone.” 

You watch him for several seconds as he shifts his weight from one foot to the other and his gaze darts around your dark apartment. When you nod and turn to retreat further into the darkness he follows without another word. 

The first thing he does when you settle on the couch is clean out your fireplace and build you a fire. Then you listen as he moves around the kitchen, opening, and closing cabinets for several minutes before he softly curses and comes back into the living room. 

“You don’t have anything to eat. I am going to go out and see what I can scrounge up, do you have any requests?” 

You just shake your head and pull your knees up under your chin.

Azriel begins to reach out to you but thinks better of it and lets his hand drop back to his side. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.” 

You don’t reply. 

When he returns you haven’t moved an inch. 

Azriel stays with you for several hours before he’s able to coax you into eating. When he leaves it’s only because Rhysand insists that it’s important and he promises he’ll be back as soon as he’s finished whatever Rhysand needs. 

When Azriel returns, he’s not alone. 

A beautiful blonde female kneels down beside you and brushes your hair back from your face. 

“Hey, Y/N,” she smiles at you, “My name is Morrigan. Azriel thought maybe you’d like someone to talk to.” 

Your eyes snapped to where he leaned against the far wall. 

“Do you mind if I spend some time with you?” She reaches into a bag to her left and pulls out a pile of clothes. “Perhaps we can get you cleaned up?” 

“Sure,” your voice is hoarse from disuse, but you take her hand and follow her into the bathing room down your hall. She draws you a bath and turns as you undress and sink below the water's surface. 

“Can I wash your hair?” She asks after a moment. When you nod she moves to sit on a stool behind you. 

You let out a low groan as she works the soap into your hair and uses her finger to gently detangle it. When she’s finished she leaves you to wash your body and get dressed. 

You can hear them speaking in hushed voices as you enter the living room. When they notice you Morrigan gives you another soft smile and gestures for you to sit in a chair in front of her. You watch Azriel’s contemplative gaze as she brushes through your hair and quickly braids it into a neat plait. 

“There, doesn’t that feel better?” She asks you before clearing her throat and pointedly looking at Azriel. 

He moves to kneel in front of you. “Y/N, Mor and I were wondering if you’d come back to Velaris with us. I can have a room prepared for you in The House of Wind, or Rhysand offered you a room in his townhouse for as long as you need it.” 

“Rhysand?” You ask, averting your gaze from Azriel’s. 

“Yes,” he reaches out and gently cups your cheek. He tilts your head so you’re looking back at him. “I’d feel better if you were closer to me.” 

You close your eyes and lean into his touch before nodding. 

—------------------------

“Are you sure you’re ready for this?” Azriel asks from across the room. “No one would blame you if you decided to stay home.” 

You shake your head and try to give him a reassuring smile, “You need a distraction, and while Feyre might be somewhat of one, I am sure that after six months away I will be a bigger one.” 

You smooth down the sheer panels of your dress and once again look at yourself in the mirror. You can see that Azriel is still watching you as well. His face pinched in concern. He runs a hand through his hair before crossing the room and coming to stand behind you. When he begins to run his hands up and down the length of your arms you lean back into his chest.

“I just don’t want to lose you again.” He finally whispers, “I’ve never been more scared than that first night in your apartment when you flinched away from my every touch.”

You turn to look up at your mate. “That won’t happen again, Az.”  This time when his hands come down your arms you catch them in your own and interlock your fingers.  “I have had so much time to heal. You have helped me more than I can even express. Everyone in our family was great, but you, Az, your unwavering support through all of the ups and downs. That made all of the difference.” 

His eyes were glassy as he let go of your hands and pulled you tightly to his body. “I love you more than anything in this world, Y/N. There is not a thing I wouldn’t do to ensure your happiness. I would burn the whole of the Court of Nightmares to the ground for you if you wished for it.” 

You pull away enough to smirk up at him, “That might be a little dramatic, Az.” 

He chuckles and drops a kiss to your forehead. “I’m being serious though, if at any time you need to leave all you have to do is say the word and we will get you out of there.” 

You smile at him and nod, but then the gravity of where you’re going hits you. Your smile falters and you bite your lip. “Hey, Az? You know the kind of things they’re going to say about me, right?” 

He nods solemnly and brushes a lock of hair from your face. “I know the accusations they’re going to throw at you, but you know that we all love you and know the truth, right?” 

You nod, but he doesn’t seem convinced. He pulls away from you and crosses the room to his dresser. You watch him with a raised eyebrow as he shuffles through his clothes and pulls out a small box. 

“I was going to wait until your birthday to give this to you, but I think it might serve as a good reminder tonight. Turn around.” 

Your eyes widen when he sweeps your hair to the side and fastens a thin chain around your neck. From the chain hung a small silver heart-shaped pendant. Your eyes widen when you notice the A delicately engraved into the front of the charm. 

“This is to remind you just how much I love you,” he whispers into your ear. “So you know even when I have to be far away.” 

Before you had a chance to thank him, there was a knock on your door. “Are you two about ready? Rhys wants to leave in 5.” Mor called from the other side. 

You fingered the charm for a moment before giving Azriel another reassuring smile. “I’m ready.” 

—---------------------------

You leaned against a pillar with Mor and lazily sipped wine as the two of you stared out at the crowd. When her father's cries could be heard over the crowd Mor turned to you and smiled, “Oh, I have to see this. Are you coming?” 

She pouted when you shook your head no, but promised to return soon and winked at you as she disappeared into the crowd. 

It takes no more than a minute after Mor leaves for a male to take her place beside you. You barely spare him a glance before looking back at the crowded dance floor. 

“What do you want, Finn?” 

“Now, Y/N, is that any way to address your brother after YOU disappeared for 6 months?” he puts a hand to his chest in mock outrage before moving in front of you to block your view. “Although, I suppose no one is particularly surprised to see you show up with them.” 

You roll your eyes at him, “Say what you’ve come to say, or leave me the fuck alone.” 

“One has to wonder though,” he puts a finger to his chin and raises a brow, “Why are you not the one perched up there on the High Lord’s knee? Could it be that you're no longer his favorite whore?” 

The familiar accusation causes you to snarl at him. “You should be careful speaking about things you know nothing about.” At that moment you notice a commotion behind Finn. When you crane your neck to look at the crowd you can’t help the smirk that comes to your lips. 

The crowd hastily parts as Azriel saunters toward you. The rage that is rippling off of him is palpable as he gets closer and has even the more powerful High Fae giving him a wide berth. When he approaches he rams a shoulder into your brother before moving next to you and pulling you to his side.

“There you are, my love.” he says gruffly as he pulls you in tighter, “I’ve been looking for you.” 

When you notice the amusement dancing in your brother’s eyes you can’t help but wonder if he was dropped in infancy or if he was just plain stupid. 

“Oh, this is delicious,” he laughs. “The Highlord got bored of you so he passed you off to one of his Illyrian brutes?” He shook his head as he continued to laugh. “You know, after the shame you brought our fam-”

Your brother didn’t have a chance to continue his train of thought before Azriel left your side and had him pinned against the wall. “You will watch how you speak about my mate. Is that clear?” 

When Finn didn’t immediately answer Azriel’s grip tightened, causing him to whimper. He looked at you for a moment before nodding to the Spymaster. He sagged in relief when Azriel set his back on the ground, but the relief was short-lived when a moment later Azriel’s fist made contact with Finn’s jaw. 

You could still see the hatred in Azriel’s eyes when he turned back toward you, but you just held your hand out to him and led him from the room and onto a balcony. 

When you were alone you once again touched the charm around your neck, “Az?” you asked in a small voice. 

“Yes, my love?” he hesitated as if he feared that you were moments away from cracking. 

“This time, I don’t need you to save me,” you smiled broadly at him, “But will you run away with me?” 

“Always,” he returned your smile and wrapped his arms tightly around you before shooting into the air. 

[acotarobsessed]

Sunlight, Shadows, and Secrets pt. 2

authors note: I don’t think this story is near done yet, but here’s part two of Sunlight, shadows, and Secrets. Since I’m the only one who has proofread this there may be some spelling and grammar mistakes. Also yeah, CoN and Hewn city are unrealistic. It’s part of the story, and if it were realistic wouldn't work right. Thanks!

warnings; Languge, bit of angst, SUGGESTIVE, leads to smut

Minors DNI

After arriving and getting settled into their individual rooms, they all split up to go their separate ways for the afternoon and evening, Cassian checking on security, Azriel checking with his spies, and Mor and Y/n waiting for Feyre, who was coming with Rhys. Y/n was glad they were all there, it made the wretched place slightly better.

A few hours later, having collected Feyre, they sat side by side in a meeting room, waiting for the males to get back from their individual tasks. Y/n’s part of the mission depended on them doing their jobs, and would most likely not be happening for at least three days. As it so happend, Cassian had been right when he said they would be able to have “fun” while being on the mission. Rhys, who they did not expect to be there, had told Feyre that the Court of Nightmares had a few comforts and entertainment, if you knew where to look. Feyre said he was lying, and Rhys being, well Rhys had to prove her wrong in the best way possible. So they had all decided they would do their work during the day, but when night fell they would all indulge in the bars and pleasure halls that the Hewn city offered.

“I’m still not sure what Rhys meant by “entertainment” but if they don’t hurry up and get here, we won’t have time after the debrief,” Feyre said, her brow wrinkling as she realized how late her mate was.

A few moments later, Feyre stood with a smirk on her face “Ladies, it seems the boys are taking their sweet time, and it’s already dark so what do you say we get started on this “fun” my mate promised me?”

Mor raised a shaped brow. “Why are you so eager? Hoping someone tall dark and handsome will forgo his job and join you? ” Her tone was light and teasing, her rich brown eyes sparkling happily, a rare sight seeing as where they were.

“Maybe” Feyre said with a grin “I’ve heard they’ve got a special kind of bars that allows females to dance on the tables, it sounds like it could be fun, and we all need to relax and let loose a bit”

Mor smirked “we could do that… or we could go to a strip club, I’ve heard they’ve got quite the male show”

Feyre wrinkled her nose in a clear veto of that idea. “I’ll pass on the strippers. The only male I want to watch strip naked is Rhys. That male is so freakin’ hot I’d give him a lap dance any day,” she said with a giggle as Mor made a disgusted face.

Yeah, Feyre was head-over-heels in love, and Y/n couldn’t help but envy the fact that her friend had found the one—and Rhys was equally smitten. Their unwavering relationship and feelings for each other made Y/n all the more aware of her own lack of male companionship, and made her wish for more.

Even though she’d harbored more intimate feelings for Azriel for years, she’d tried to give other males a chance. She’d even been in a few short-term but committed relationships with nice, decent guys. Safe males who didn’t intimidate her and treated her with the kind of respect a female deserved. Easygoing males who didn’t judge her by her purple-tipped hair, her eccentric clothing, or her sleeve of tattoos that made others label her as different or strange.

But deep inside, Y/n knew that focusing on those more passive qualities when it came to the males she’d dated had been part of the problem and why those attempts at a relationship hadn’t worked for her. She wanted that safety and trust and respect—what girl didn’t?—but she also yearned for intense passion and the kind of heated desire that overwhelmed her body and senses. She wanted a male who was confident in his ability to take control and introduce her to the kind of forbidden pleasures her body craved, without making her feel cheap or dirty or vulnerable afterward.

So far, she hadn’t met a male with that unique ability, and maybe she never would. Which meant she’d eventually have to settle for a male who made her feel appreciated and secure, and forgo her fantasies of hot, demanding sex.

Mor gave Feyre’s idea about the dancing bar serious consideration, and after a few minutes said “Hell yes!”

“Sounds good to me,” Feyre said with an enthusiastic nod.

Y/n shrugged, up for anything that didn’t include having to endure seeing Azriel enjoy himself with another female. Indulging in a few drinks and dancing, even with just the girls, sounded like a fun way to spend the evening. “I’m game.”

With their evening agenda settled, the three of them finished in the office, then headed up to their individual suites to change and do their makeup and hair. Wanting to feel sexy for their night out, Y/n decided on a pair of slim black leather pants that rode low on her hips and a dark purple bustier that displayed her armful of tattoos. The front of the top laced up tight, and the snug bodice lifted and shaped her breasts so a bra wasn’t necessary. She finished off the look with a stack of silver bangles on her bare arm and a pair of strappy high heels.

She tucked her room key into the front pocket of her pants so she didn’t have to worry about a purse, and an hour and a half after parting ways to get ready, the three of them met up again. They grabbed a quick dinner, then walked the short distance to where the was located, which also gave them the opportunity to look around hewn city. Everything was dark and bleak, Y/n hoped the bar was worth it.

By the time they arrived at the establishment, the place was packed and rocking from the music blaring out of the jukebox in the corner. There weren’t any traditional booths or chairs, just standing-style tables on the outskirt of the dance floor, which was filled with males and females having a great time. Other female patrons were dancing on the bar counter, and guys were crowded around, egging them on.

Y/n led the way to one of the standing tables so they could order a drink, assess the situation, and watch the entertainment at the main bar before they decided what they wanted to do. Mor and Feyre followed her through the crowd, and by the time they reached a vacant table, Feyre had a spaced out look on her face. Judging by the smile on her face, Y/n assumed she was touching base with Rhysand. When a bar waitress came by, she ordered a round of shots for the three of them.

Feyre finished up her mental conversation just as their drinks were delivered, and Y/n raised her small glass to her two friends.

“To our first official girls’ night out, even if it is on the eve of a mission,” she said in a loud voice to be heard above the noise level. “When we get back home, I think we need to do this more often, just the three of us, no males.”

“Agreed,” Feyre and Mor said at the same time.

They tapped their shot glasses together and swallowed the liquor in one gulp. It wasn’t enough alcohol to get them drunk—no way did Y/n want to explain to Rhysand that his mate had a hangover on the first day there—but it was just enough to warm her insides and loosen and relax her body.

A good-looking guy came up to Mor and asked her to dance, and with a little finger wave at her and Feyre, she followed him out onto the dance floor. Feyre and Y/n watched for a while, both of them dancing where they were standing at the table along the far wall.

After a while, another male approached them, this one big and burly, rough around the edges, as most were in the Hewn city, and clearly well on his way to being drunk. When he grabbed Y/n’s hand to pull her away without asking if she wanted to dance with him, she yanked her arm back and gave him a sharp look that hopefully conveyed her feelings and made it clear she wasn’t interested.

His narrowed gaze slid down the length of her in the kind of leer that made her stomach roil. Then he puffed out his wide chest and flexed his biceps as if he were trying to make up for the fact that he’d just been rejected. “What’s the matter? I’m not good enough for you?”

And this was why she didn’t go to bars. Hell, she rarely went to Rita’s on their busy nights because she hated dealing with egotistical males who looked at her like an easy conquest, and bloodying them over a dance was frowned upon. Instead of provoking him further, she gave the male a sweet smile and said, “I don’t dance with strangers.”

It was a ridiculous statement considering that’s what most people did in a nightclub, but her comment was so worth it when he frowned in confusion at her, as if she’d just given him a puzzle to figure out. Then he shook his head and slid his gaze to Feyre. There was no way Y/n was letting this guy even think about taking one step toward her.

“She doesn’t dance with strangers, either,” Y/n said just as the lug opened his mouth to say something.

After giving Y/n an irritated look, he turned around and finally left them alone.

Feyre laughed, her eyes full of playful mischief as she leaned closer to Y/n. “So, since we don’t dance with strangers, want to dance with each other?”

Considering Feyre wasn’t going to dance with any guy in the place and Y/n wanted her to have a good time, she nodded and the two of them joined the crush of people getting down to the rough and tumble music comig from seemingly everywhere. Even though she didn’t do it often, Y/n loved to dance, loved the sensuality of her movements and the way the beat of the music made her body come alive.

The two of them danced a few songs until Y/n lost track of time. But they were having fun as they laughed and watched other couples bust out trendsetting dance moves, and Y/n found herself envious of the females who were brave enough to get up on the bar top and dance in front of everyone.

She had no idea how much time had passed, but when she saw Feyre’s gaze move to someone behind Y/n and watched her face light up like a woman in love, she wasn’t surprised to see that the person she was beaming at turned out to be Rhysand, who had somehow found his mate in the crowd.

Y/n leaned closed to Feyre so she could speak directly in her ear and be heard over the music. “What is Rhys doing here?”

When she moved back, Feyre’s expression was sheepish, and a tad apologetic. “I told him where we were and asked him and the boys to come join us.”

Which meant that Azriel was here, as well. Fucking fabulous, Y/n thought, not at all happy that the boys had just crashed their girls’ night out and fun. Then again, it was hard to be upset with Feyre when all she wanted was to be with her mate, but Y/n had expected it to be a Azriel-free evening.

“Sorry to cut in and steal away my beautiful mate,” Rhys said as he wrapped his arms around Feyre and pulled her close.

The sinful gleam in his eyes told Y/n he wasn’t the least bit sorry to be able to spend extra time with her before they went to their individual suites for the night.

“Last I saw, Cassian and Azriel were getting a beer and heading over to one of those tables with Mor,” Rhys went on, jerking his head in the direction where the girls had been earlier. “I’m sure if you ask Az, he’ll dance with you.”

Oh, hell no. That was one activity she’d avoided at all costs with Azriel throughout the years, knowing that it would be sheer torture for her to have his hard, muscled body pressed so close, and to feel the grind of his hips against hers like a slow, sexual tease. And that’s all it ever would be, since Az wasn’t attracted to her in the same way she was to him.

She made her way back to the area with tables and found Cass and Mor at one of them, both drinking a beer. No Azriel, of course.

“Where’s Az?” she asked, knowing it was a bad idea even before she spoke, and that she wouldn’t like the answer.

“He took my comment about getting female a little too seriously,” Cassian said, his tone droll but barely hiding his laughter, leaving no doubt in Y/n’s mind as to what he meant. Man-whoring. And while he was no where near as bad as Cassian, who used to openly flaunted his conquests, it still stung to know that Azriel had no such hang-ups when it came to sleeping with strangers.

“He’s over there by the bar, trying to charm his way into that girl’s pants,” Mor added unnecessarily as she pushed her long, blonde hair over her shoulder.

Don’t look, don’t look, don’t look. . . you’ll just get upset over something you can’t change Y/n’s subconscious warned her.

Like an idiot, she glanced over her shoulder and looked, her stomach in knots even before her gaze zeroed in on the one male who had way too much power over her emotions. It was a scene she’d witnessed so many times before—hot, gorgeous, tattooed Azriel, with his shadows out of sight, flirting with some random girl who had caught his eye, his devastatingly sexy smile promising the kind of pleasure most females couldn’t resist. Judging by the way the pretty girl put her hand on his arm and swayed toward him so their bodies brushed, he was close to sealing the deal.

Hurt and anger warred within Y/n, the latter of which she had no right to feel. Logically she knew Azriel was free to do what he wanted, with whomever he chose, but what upset her the most was the fact that he’d managed to ruin the fun she’d been having. He’d crashed their party, and she resented him being there and forcing her to watch him most likely leave the place with another woman.

She exhaled a deep breath, trying to release the ache tightening in her chest, but the tension remained, especially when she added in the fact that he’d called her uptight earlier today and accused her of not being able to loosen up and have fun. During that time they were waiting to leave for the Court of Nightmares, he’d suggested she find a random guy to have a fling with, and in a moment of frustration, she’d told Azriel that she would.

She remembered that dumbfounded look on his face, and his shock that she’d actually agreed to do something so out of character. She’d given him that flippant reply because he’d provoked her, but now she seriously considered putting herself out there to see what would happen, and how Az would react.

And hell, maybe she’d get lucky tonight, too.

The bartenders were urging females to dance up on the counter, and Y/n realized that it was the perfect opportunity to show Azriel that she was fully capable of letting loose and having a good time without him. She was finished standing on the sidelines, waiting and pining for something that wasn’t going to happen because Azriel didn’t reciprocate her feelings.

You can do this, her inner vixen coaxed, bolstering her courage and confidence. Get up on that bar and give Azriel a show he’ll never forget.

And that’s exactly what she intended to do, Y/n vowed as she headed for the stairs that led up to the staged bar, just as a fast paced, sexy song started to play.

***

One minute Az was trying to figure out how to nicely extricate himself from the overly aggressive female who’d seemingly staked a claim on him the moment he’d walked into the bar, and the next he was distracted by a round of loud cheers, appreciative male whistles, and catcalling coming from the direction of one of the bars.

Mildly curious as to what had the crowd all worked up, he glanced over the woman’s shoulder toward the commotion. Every muscle in his body tensed when he saw Y/n dancing on top of the bar, looking hotter and more seductive than he’d ever seen her before. He’d also never seen her so . . . uninhibited, and especially in a public place.

What the fucking hell?

A combination of shock and awe held Azriel’s gaze hostage, and his mouth went dry as dust and his shadows swirling irritably as he watched her body move so sensually to the beat of the music. Those small hips circled and swayed with lithe grace, and her cloud of gorgeous hair cascaded down her back as she tipped her head, raised her arms above her head, and drove the men around her wild with a shimmying move that nearly brought Azriel to his knees right where he was standing.

Lust made his blood surge like molten lava in his veins, spilling through him in a rush of carnal hunger. He couldn’t move. He couldn’t breathe. He could only stare at this bold, brazen, uninhibited woman he barely recognized as his best friend

Who was this siren girl and what had she done with his composed and reserved Y/n?

Not that he was complaining. The tight leather pants she wore molded to her sexy curves and her perfect ass—the same luscious ass she was currently putting on display as she bent over and ran a hand up her leg in a slow, sultry caress as she straightened once again. When she lifted her smoky gaze, Azriel could have sworn that she was looking directly at him with those dark, come-hither eyes. Teasing him. Taunting him. Tormenting him with what he couldn’t have. Fuck.

Or maybe his wild imagination was just playing tricks on him, because she’d never, ever given him any indication that she wanted to get down and dirty with him. Then again, this racy performance could be for another man entirely, and why did that thought make his stomach feel as though he’d just swallowed a dozen burning coals?

Hips gyrating to the music, she continued to skim those mesmerizing hands over her stomach and cupped her breasts over the corset top that was held together with just the thin ties that laced up the front. So fucking naughty. Her lips parted, and a hint of a smile played across her sinful mouth.

A mouth he suddenly wanted to do filthy, wicked things to. Right now.

Another ovation of rambunctious cheers attracted even more male attention to Y/n. Some guy offered her up a shot, and she took the glass and tossed back the liquor in one gulp, then sent a defiant glance in his general direction before continuing with her dirty dancing.

Gods, was she drunk? It was the only thing that made sense to Azriel. Y/n wasn’t an attention seeker, and she wasn’t the kind of female who paraded herself in front of males, not unless it was for a good reason. Then again, nothing about her behavior lately had been predictable or typical, and this little display of rebellion was the last straw. He’d had enough. Tonight, he was going to find out what the hell was going on with her.

Before he could figure out a way to get Y/n out of there without causing a scene, one of the guys at the bar made the huge mistake of reaching out and touching her. The dickhead curled his hand around her calf and started sliding it upward, and Azriel thought he was going to lose it, his hand going to the small blade he kept on him even while wearing cause clothing, as he was now.

He saw bright red as hot, fierce jealousy jolted through him. An unprecedented depth of emotion flooded him as he pushed his way through all her admirers to make his way up to the bar. He told himself he was being a friend and protecting her from one of these douchebags who might take advantage of her being drunk, but that didn’t explain the possessive feeling pumping through him with each step he took toward her. Add to that the steady stream of adrenaline ramping him up, and it was a potent combination that had him on edge and itching for a fight.

Realizing that the mob around the bar was too crammed and it would take him too goddamn long to get to Y/n, he instead went for the stairs that led directly to the top of the bar. As he climbed up, she caught sight of him and her eyes grew wide with panic, as if she realized she’d provoked him a little too far. He narrowed his gaze ominously and his wings flared, conveying his thoughts with that one look. That’s right, Y/n. Be afraid. Be very afraid because tonight we’re finally going to hash out what the fuck your problem is.

Now that Azriel was on top of the bar—and yeah, he knew males weren’t allowed up there, but tough shit—their audience grew. Heads turned their way as everyone watched the scene about to unfold. Despite how pissed he was, Azriel was determined to set aside his anger and be nice and gentle about getting Y/n out of there.

When he reached her, he circled his fingers loosely around her wrist to make sure she would follow. “Come on, Y/n, we’re leaving.”

She yanked her hand out of his grasp and lifted her chin stubbornly. Her face was flushed and her eyes flashed fire. “I’m not going anywhere with you.”

Okay . . . Apparently, he needed to line up a Plan B.

“Yes, you are,” he said firmly, all too aware of all the eyes on them. “I suggest you come with me willingly, or you’re not going to like the alternative. The choice is yours.”

She crossed her arms over her chest, a reckless glint in her eyes as she glared at him. “You’re such an asshole, Az.”

Clearly, she was mad at him. For ruining her fun? Or something else? That was the problem lately—he had no fucking clue what he’d done wrong. Since she was already furious, he figured things couldn’t get much worse.

He sighed. “Since you think I’m an asshole, I might as well live up to my reputation.” Before she realized his intent, he bent low, wrapped his arms around the backs of her thighs, and hefted her over his shoulder in a fireman’s hold. She was slim and light—he bench-pressed more than what she weighed—and he heard her gasp at being taken by surprise.

She wriggled and squirmed as he headed back toward the stairs, with the crowd now cheering him on.

Her fists pummeled his backside. “Goddamn it, Shadowsinger, let me down!”

He had no intentions of putting her feet back on the ground, because he knew he wouldn’t get this kind of leverage over her again. “Not gonna happen, Y/n, so relax and enjoy the ride.”

“Fuck you!” she bellowed.

He shook his head in disbelief. Cauldron, when had she become such a hellcat?

He reached the bottom of the stairs and encountered Rhys, who was frowning at him in that reprimanding way of his, and Azriel knew that his brother was going to be all... well, brotherly, and try to interfere.

Before Rhysand could say a word, Azriel spoke first. “Don’t you fucking dare try to stop me. Y/n and I have some things to hash out, and it’s happening tonight.”

Surprisingly, Rhys backed down, nodded in understanding, and let him pass by. They all knew how out of character this stunt of Y/n’s was, and his brother also knew Azriel would never physically hurt her.

The next roadblock Az encountered was the big, beefy bouncer standing at the door, muscular arms folded over his chest, who wouldn’t let him walk by

Is she leaving with you willingly?” the bouncer asked gruffly.

“No!” Y/n shouted as she tried to kick her legs, which Azriel held down with his forearm. “He’s taking me!”

“She’s such a drama queen.” Azriel rolled his eyes. “Honestly, no, she’s not leaving with me willingly,” he said, because, hello, he had Y/n flipped over his shoulder and she was yelling obscenities at him. There was nothing willing about this particular scenario or her conduct. “But she’s had a lot to drink and I’d rather her be my problem than yours.”

The bouncer didn’t budge, his expression dubious. The dude obviously took his job seriously, and while Az appreciated him being thorough and cautious, quite frankly, he needed the guy to let them through.

“I can vouch for him.” Cassian came up to the door, surprising Azriel with his support. The bouncer, obviously recognizing the High Lords general, moved aside to let them past.

“Thanks” Azriel said to his brother. “I owe you one.”

Cass gave him a wry smile. “Yeah, you do.”

Behind Azriel, Y/n pushed up on her hands so she could look at Cassian as they walked through the exit—or glare at him, Az was guessing.

“You’re such a traitor, Cassian!” she shouted at him.

Azriel heard his brother chuckle before saying, “See you two at some point tomorrow.”

As soon as they were finally out on the sidewalk leading to their hotel, Y/n started up again, thrashing and pummeling and cursing, yet still being carful not to hurt his wings. She drew curious stares from strangers, but Az just smiled and nodded at the passersby as if this was normal for the two of them, not that anyone would say anything, Az was quite intimidating, and kept strolling toward the place they were staying.

“I can walk, you jerk! Put me down already,” she demanded as she smacked and pinched his butt, then growled in frustration when she encountered mostly firm muscle.

“Nope. And quit wiggling around.” When she didn’t stop, he returned the favor, slapping her bottom so hard she gasped and arched her back from the direct contact. His palm stung from the sharp swat, which meant she’d likely have his handprint on her ass—and Mother above, the image of that possessive mark on her pale skin made his cock hard as stone.

She finally settled down. “I hate you,” she said, a pout in her voice.

There was no vehemence behind her words, but Azriel knew that for the moment, for whatever reason, she wasn’t very fond of him. “I know you do, Angel. I just don’t know why.”

“I already told you,” she said, perking up again. “It’s because you’re an asshole.”

He let it go at that, and when they finally reached the rooms, Y/n was dead weight over his shoulder and uncharacteristically quiet. He figured she’d either fallen asleep or passed out from the alcohol she’d consumed.

He figured wrong. On the ride up the quiet, vacant elevator, she finally spoke.

“Will you please put me down now?” she asked through gritted teeth, her voice clear enough that he knew she’d been awake the entire time. “You’ve humiliated me enough tonight.”

“Me?” he asked incredulously as he bent his knees and anchored her feet on the ground, then helped her to stand. They were facing one another now, and he felt his earlier irritation flare back to life. “I was trying to keep you from humiliating yourself up on that bar!”

Her spine stiffened and her gaze shot daggers at him. “I was doing just fine until you came along and ruined my night. I didn’t want or need your help.”

“Yeah, well, tough shit,” he shot back as he jammed his hands on his hips and tried to keep his gaze above her neck when her heaving chest tempted him to look at her perfect breasts pushed up so enticingly by her top. “That’s what best friends do, Y/n. They make sure their drunk friends get back to their hotel safely instead of leaving with some random stranger.”

Her jaw dropped incredulously. “I can’t believe that just came out of your mouth. You’re such a fucking hypocrite.”

Hypocrite? Was that what she really thought when he was trying to be a good guy and do the right thing? Gods, he’d never seen her so combative, so angry at him. Sure, they’d had squabbles over their centuries of friendship, but it was as though her current animosity was an accumulation of weeks, or months, of harboring resentments of some kind.

Before he could demand she explain the hypocrite comment, the elevator arrived on their floor. As soon as the doors slid open, she marched out into the corridor all huffy-puffy and turned toward her suite. He grabbed her upper arm before she could walk too far away, and just like back at the bar, she managed to yank out of his grasp.

She spun around to say something most likely rude and scathing, her hair flying around her shoulders, and he took advantage and did the only thing he could think of to keep ahold of her so she couldn’t escape him or the discussion they were going to have. Whether she liked it or not.

Impulsively, his hand shot out and he grabbed the front of her leather pants. He seized the waistband in his fist and jerked her toward him so abruptly that she stumbled on her heels and inhaled a quick breath. Her hands landed on his chest, which allowed her to regain her balance, but she was quick to try and push away from him. She only managed about a foot of space because his grip was strong and unrelenting, and he didn’t intend to let her go.

“What the hell, Az?” she said, her shock as profound as his own.

As he stared into her wide eyes that were a bit too bright with what he would have sworn was desire, he wasn’t sure if her surprise was a result of him asserting a bit of physical control over her, or the fact that he’d tucked four long fingers between the fly of her pants and her lower stomach. Fuck, his knuckles were grazing the softest, silkiest flesh he’d ever had the pleasure of touching.

He gritted his teeth. Cauldron, he literally had his hand down her pants.

Asshole that he was, he wanted to push his fingers a little lower, wanted to slide them between her thighs and discover how hot and wet and aroused she was. And deeper, how tight and slick she would feel around his cock as he buried himself to the hilt.

He swore beneath his breath and shook his head, hard, doing his best to dislodge the indecent images in his mind, because this was not the time or place. Ignoring the erection thickening against the front of his pants took equal effort, and he forced his mind back to the issue at hand.

“We’re not done with this conversation,” he said as he started toward his room while pulling her behind him by the waistband of her pants, being just aggressive enough that she couldn’t stop him and was forced to follow. “You’ve had a bug up your butt the past few months, and you’re not leaving my room until you tell me what the fuck is going on and why you’re acting so irrationally, and why lately you always seem to be pissed off or annoyed with me.”

Reaching his room, he pulled his key out of his pocket with his free hand and unlocked the door. The lock disengaged, and he opened the door and hauled her inside the suite. As soon as they cleared the entry area and were in the small living room, he finally released her.

She quickly put distance between them, then whirled around to face him. There was one lamp turned on next to the couch, and the drapes had been pulled open across the floor-to-ceiling windows that overlooked the shadows of Hewn city at night. The room was slightly shadowed, and while he would have preferred more light, it wasn’t a priority at the moment. She was, and he refused to be the first one to look away from their current stare-off and give her any kind of advantage.

Her chin lifted a fraction, her expression fierce and angry all over again. With her leather pants, purple-tipped hair, and sleeve of tattoos, she looked like the tough chick she liked the outside world to believe she was. But despite her being a spitfire right now, he reminded himself that beneath that stubborn, defiant exterior, she was the sweetest, most vulnerable girl he knew. She’d survived a hellish childhood, had endured the kind of pain that went soul-deep and would leave most people as twisted and fucked up as he was.

But not his Y/n. She’d always been his anchor, the one person who kept him balanced and grounded when his life felt as though it was spinning out of control. She’d saved his ass more times than he could count. Maybe it was his turn to return the favor, to try and be patient and understanding—two things that he admitted had never come easily for him.

Except judging by the tight pursing of Y/n’s lips and the irritation and restless energy nearly vibrating off of her, she didn’t seem to want his empathy. No, she looked like she was ready for an uncivilized altercation with him.

If that’s how she wanted to play this out, he’d give her the verbal brawl she was anticipating. He knew how to poke and prod and push her buttons. She wasn’t leaving this room until that fucking chip was off her shoulder and they cleared the air between them.

Since she didn’t seemed inclined to speak first, he did. “What did you mean when you called me a hypocrite?” he asked, wanting to know what he’d done to deserve that less-than-complimentary label.

“A fucking hypocrite,” she corrected him. “Because that’s what you are. You’re so concerned about me leaving with a random stranger—”

“Because you’d been drinking,” he cut her off, though he knew that excuse was only the partial truth. Watching her dance up on the bar, so lithe and hot and sexy—something she’d never done before—while other men lusted after her, had been the other very strong motivating factor for his rash actions.

“For the record, I am not drunk. Not even close,” she said as she folded her arms over her chest—tempting his gaze to stray once again to those plump breasts straining against the front of her corset top.

Damn, he wanted to pluck that tie and set those gorgeous tits free so he could mold them in his hands and take them in his mouth.

“I had two shots over the course of two hours,” she went on, oblivious to his wandering thoughts and gaze. “So if I decide to get up on top of a bar and dance and shake my ass, that’s my choice, not yours. And if I decide to leave with some hot random guy I want to fuck my brains out—which I was considering since I had so many eager males to choose from,” she said in a tone designed to provoke him, “again, I’m a adult and that’s my decision to make.”

Oh, yeah, she was all fired up, and he was still trying to get past the disconcerting image of her leaving with a guy she wanted to fuck her brains out.

His gut churned with something very green, like envy, and he didn’t like it. Not one bit. “I just don’t want you to do something you’ll regret later.” Gods, when had he become such a liar? And when had her sex life, and who she chose to sleep with, become his concern? It had never bothered him before, but perhaps that was because he was so caught up in his own he hadn’t noticed.

“Oh, my Gods,” she said incredulously. “Aren’t you the one who told me right before we left that I’m too uptight and I don’t know how to have a good time? And didn’t you bring up the fact that it’s been a long while since I’ve been laid and I ought to take advantage of being here and find myself a one-night stand and fuck him through the Kama Sutra?” she exaggerated.

He bristled in frustration and irritation, because somehow she’d turned all this around and was now intentionally pushing his buttons. “I never said that,” he replied heatedly as he moved toward her.

“Whatever. Close enough,” she said, waving a careless hand in the air. “And I don’t know why you’re so worried about who I might or might not screw when you were well on your way to hooking up with the first woman you came across!”

As he neared, he saw two distinct emotions pass over her features—hurt, which was quickly followed by . . . jealousy? How could that be possible?

Certain he’d misread her fleeting expression, he pinned her with an unyielding look and got a few things off his chest, as well. “I don’t know why you’ve been so irritable lately, or what your problem is, but I’m getting damn tired of trying to figure out your mood swings.”

She sucked in an indignant breath. “Want to know what my problem is?” she said on a sudden eruption of outrage. “You’re my problem, Azriel.”

She turned to leave, but he was faster. He grabbed her arm, and before she could shake him off this time, he pushed her up against the nearby wall. He flattened his hands on either side of her shoulders to cage her in, and pressed his hips hard against hers to keep her in place until he decided they were done talking.

“You don’t get to say something like that and just leave without an explanation,” he said in a low, harsh voice, shadows swirling and wings flared.

Her glittering eyes flashed with a quiet but meaningful message for him to go to hell. Lips pressed tight together, she gave him the silent treatment—something she knew he hated.

He was prepared to wait her out as long as it took. “I have all goddamn night, Y/n.”

Seconds ticked into minutes, her willful and obstinate attitude never wavering, nor did her heated gaze. After a while, she tried to move to the side to escape him, but that maneuver only caused their lower bodies to rub together—the soft mound of her sex against the front of his pants.

He got hard—so fucking huge there was no way to hide his response to her and the position of their bodies. There was no way she could miss his massive erection, and still, he didn’t move, determined to wait her out for the answer she owed him. Except he hadn’t anticipated that the awareness and sexual tension between them would grow so increasingly thick he could barely remember why he’d trapped her there in the first place. To make some kind of point, yes, but all his aggravation gradually dissolved as male instinct and an undeniable bolt of sexual hunger coursed through him.

Forbidden desire and dark lust swirled through his veins like smoke, testing his control and weakening his will to resist this woman and all the dirty, filthy things he’d fantasized about for too long. Everything below his waistband tightened and pulsed as he stared into her eyes and saw her own carnal cravings reflecting back at him. Flecks of gold glittered in her eyes, her scent got heavier, sweeter, and her full, tempting lips softened and parted, as if inviting him to find out just how sweet she was inside.

He licked his own lips, so starved for the taste of her he felt as though he’d fucking die if he didn’t get the chance to experience her flavor. Kissing women, anywhere, wasn’t something he indulged in often, and he honestly couldn’t remember the last time he’d wanted to put his mouth on a woman for the sheer pleasure of it.

Sex for him was always quick and uncomplicated, focusing more on his body’s needs and chasing that intoxicating high that rushed through him at the peak of climax. That physical release allowed him to forget the pain and torment that was always lurking just below the surface, just waiting for a moment of weakness to consume and ravage him.

As a result, his sexual urges were dark and dominant and aggressive. He liked control, and he’d only hooked up with females who wanted the same thing and gave it up willingly, without any expectations. Easy females who made it simple to fuck them and walk away without any emotional involvement.

But right now, in this moment with Y/n, he wasn’t looking to forget or escape anything. No, he wanted to document every single trembling breath she took, wanted to memorize the flush on her face and the way her pupils dilated with lust the longer they stood in this position, with his cock aching to be inside her. He wanted to remember how small and perfect her soft curves felt pressed against his straining dick, how her increasingly erratic breathing caused her breasts to lift and quiver as the undeniable anticipation between them escalated, second by second. He wanted to bury his face against her neck, inhale her heady female scent, and lose himself in her sweet, luscious body.

Except there was nothing sweet about the way he took females. He didn’t know how to do slow or gentle or romantic, though for her he would try. When he fucked, he was rough and hard and demanding. Y/n was the one good thing in his life, and he never wanted to taint her with his perverse need to use sex to ease all those underlying raging emotions from the past that he struggled to keep buried so he didn’t hurt anyone or anything.

Especially Y/n. His angel.

But as their battle of wills continued, despite the gradual softening changes in her body language, a part of him couldn’t deny how much he needed this female, how badly he ached to be a part of her, in a dozen different ways that were so goddamn wrong he was a prick for even contemplating corrupting her.

But then she made a soft, aroused sound of need in the back of her throat, and his control wavered as an answering fever thrummed through his veins and the beat of his heart echoed louder and louder in his ears. The intensity between them became a tangible thing, until she turned her head away, finally breaking eye contact with him.

And he hated it. Hated that she was trying to shut him out and ignore this fire smoldering between them. He moved one of his hands, his fingers touching the side of her face while his thumb skimmed along her lush, damp bottom lip.

“Look at me, Y/n,” he demanded softly. This was no longer about their argument or extracting an explanation. No, this was something altogether different, and he was fucking helpless to resist the temptation beckoning to him.

Much to his surprise, she exhaled a shuddering breath that made her breasts tremble and obeyed his command. When her soft gaze met his once again, he knew he was done for. Gone. Lost. Those beautiful eyes, they saw into the deepest, darkest part of his soul. They always had, and in this moment, he felt so open, exposed, and vulnerable.

She swallowed hard, the hands at her sides coming up to his chest, where she lightly gripped his shirt in her fists. Conflicting emotions flashed in her eyes, and he knew she was struggling to deny what they both clearly wanted. What they both needed.

“Azriel.…” Her voice sounded strangled and uncertain.

He didn’t want to hear any excuses. Didn’t want to give either of them a chance to stop what was about to happen. Without thinking of consequences, he pushed her chin up with his thumb and lowered his mouth to hers, finally taking what he’d wanted for the past 200 years.

A/N: Thanks for reading! Feedback is always appreciated, and if you want to be added to my taglist, just ask in the comments! I’m probably going to do a part three, what do we think? Nyx 🌹

[kenziejones16789]

Drunk text

Okay so this story is based on a song I’m currently obsessed with called “drunk text” by Henry Moodie (hence the title :))anyway in theory it would work as a modern au but I don’t want to write to much modern and I have a story idea I would really love to do as modern so eventually that will come out. This ended up being chaotic but I like the idea so I’m just posting anyway. (Also I’m not including all the lyrics and I really request the song it’s great)

5th of November 

When I walked you home 

That’s when I nearly said it 

But then said “forget it” and froze

Do you remember?

You probably don’t 

‘Cause the sparks in the sky

Took a hold of your eyes when we spoke

“Y/N/N” 

I hummed in response to my name, I was to comfortable to move I was pressed up to a warm body, whoever it was smelled wonderful like cedar and night-chilled mist I curled closer, distantly I was aware of the hard wood bench below me and the buzz of conversation around, but it had been a long day and I felt safe where I was. “Y/N/N, darling want me to take you home?” A broad hand swept gently under my chin and lifted my face I reluctantly opened my eyes azriels’ hazel eyes glowed in the light like copper against honey or sunlight through amber I lifted my hands to his face “you have the prettiest eyes azzy” there was a shift behind his eyes but I didn’t have the energy to pick up what it was, I don’t know how I ended up agreeing to go to Rita’s in the first place I had barely slept for days training with Magda was incredible but we had a difficult case and I had spent many sleepless nights trying to figure out how to help.

“I’m going to take you home” he wasn’t asking this time but I was quite happy to go home and pass out in my bed, i swayed on my feet when I stood up but Azriels hand was on the small of my back steading me his shadows wrapped around me as if they could help hold me up, I leaned into him as we said a quick goodbye to our friends and left the busy bar. We didn’t talk much but the silence was comforting, velaris was so still it was a stark comparison to the bustle of Rita’s it was calm and combined with the cool night air it helped clear the fog on my mind. 

I lived in a little town house at the very outskirts of velaris, and I adored my home it had a white picket fence that held in the wild greenery because I liked to plant things but I wasn’t the best at controlling them and there was a tiny covered porch that azriel built me because he knew I loved to read outside and it had a big bay window out the front, i had a beautiful kitchen and I didn’t have room for a library so there was books on basically every surface, but my favourite part of my home was how close it was to the forest and the cliffs, so whenever I felt overwhelmed I could go to my favourite spots and everything would fall into place. Azriel slowed down the closer we got to my house, “Az?” He looked at me and stopped dead in his tracks when we where no more than four steps to my gate i turned to face him he ran his fingers through his hair hard, too hard “Az what’s wrong?” He was breathing hard i stepped towards him but then his breathing slowed “forget it, I’m fine don’t worry” he smiled softly and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, I cocked my head waiting for him to tell me the truth, he was my closet friend and we didn’t lie to each other, “I’m fine” he said again then he placed a kiss on top of my head and winnowed away leaving me alone.

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Yesterday, drank way to much

And stayed up too late

Started to write what I wanna say

Deleted the message

But I still remember it said,

I wish I was who you drunk texted at midnight 

wish I was the reason you stayed up till 3

And you can’t fall asleep waiting for me to reply 

“Azriel!” Cassian roared across the bar waving me over with the biggest grin on his face, i rolled my eyes and left my spot at our table to join him at his spot at the bar “Nesta seems to think that you would be able to drink more than me for some reason so we need test that theory” that was the last think i wanted to do what I really wanted to do was find Y/N and talk because I was going to tell her how i felt last night then i chickened out and just left and I wanted her to know why but before I could refuse cassian, nesta and feyre stumbled over from the dance floor laughing at each other she was supposed to be with them “where’s Y/N” they both pulled themselves onto a bar stool before answering “wellll our little Y/N has found herself someone to go home with tonight” Nesta said then her and feyre burst into laughter again, a riot of emotions overwhelmed me but I settled on resignation I missed my chance, “pass me that drink cass let’s prove Nesta’s theory”.

I tried to fly home but after crashing in a fountain I decided that walking might be better, i drank cass under the table then i kept going, but no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t get her out of my head. I fumbled with my keys for a few minutes i dropped them twice before getting my door opened then i walked through my dark living room pulling off soaked pieces of clothing and leaving them strewn across the floor wherever the fell, i dropped into a scalding hot bath and let my head fall back against the porcelain my shadows purred to me and tried to tell me things I didn’t want to know, i shut them out the best I could I wanted to be alone. 

An hour or so later I lay on my stomach in bed trying to sleep but I wasn’t tired so begrudgingly I rolled out of bed, what was the point of drinking that much if it wouldn’t even numb me enough to sleep, I shuffled to my little desk and lit a candle I picked up some reports and tried to get work down, my gaze shifted over the top of the paper to the blank wall over my desk, all of my walls where blank I never spent any time here this wasn’t home, the house of wind used to be nice, not necessarily mine but it was comfortable, actually if I thought about it the closest thing I had to home was the little townhouse that belonged to Y/N it was probably one of the only places since Rhys’ moms house in wind haven where I was completely relaxed and myself, I missed her, I wanted to go home, I wanted to go to my real home. I put down the report I wasn’t reading it anyway, and i pulled forward a blank piece of paper and i started writing to her.

—————————————————————————————————————————

April the 7th

And nothing has changed

It’s hard to get by

When you’re still on my mind everyday

Sometimes I question

If you feel the same

Do we make stupid jokes?

Trying to hide that we’re both too afraid to say.

I was sitting at the edge of a cliff my feet dangling over the edge I relaxed back on my hand and watched how the sunset painted the sky all different shades of pinks and oranges, it had been a hard day at the clinic we where to late to save our patient and I couldn’t help but think of what I could’ve done better maybe they would’ve lived, soft footsteps came from behind me I probably wouldn’t have noticed them at all if I didn’t know azriel so well, he knew where to find me after a bad day he sat down beside me giving me a the space I needed we sat in silence for a while “you know I heard a great joke today, want to hear it?” I didn’t reply I saw him smirk out of the side of my eye “did the ocean say to the beach?” He paused for a while then with a big toothy smile on his face he said “nothing it just waved” then he started laughing at his own joke enough that it got me to smile and then slowly I started chuckling until it turned into full on laughs I slapped his chest lightly “that was awful” but I laughed while I said it he wrapped an arm around my waist and he pulled us both to the ground so we where lying in the soft grass “I thought it was an excellent joke” he said with a adorable pout on his face I laughed at the look it was rare to see him so expressive but slowly I began to remember why I came to the cliff and the laughter faded away and his smile went away “what happened?” I could feel tears building “I lost a patient, and I just keep thinking that maybe if I had done something differently then they would have lived” he caressed my face “I’m sorry, but it’s not your fault, people die it’s part of life and it sucks but it happened Y/N/N” tears started falling “I know I just I—“ he pulled me close to him and somehow it made every thing feel a bit better “its not your fault, you can let it hurt, but don’t let it make you doubt yourself, you are incredible and you save so many lives” I sniffling into his chest and nodded half heartedly and rolled onto my back but moved as close into his side as I could his arm wrapped around me and together we lay and watched the sky turn dark and the stars blink into existence.

—————————————————————————————————————————

Oh, and here we go again

Destroy myself to keep a friend 

Hiding away ‘cause I was afraid you’d say no

It was family dinner night and all of us where sitting around the giant dinning table designed for our growing family Nyx was happily mashing his already mashed potatoes into the table and  Y/N who was beside him gently pulled his hands away from the mess and carefully cleaned each finger while making faces that had our nephew howling with laughter all of us where talking over each other and stuffing our faces, Rhys called over the table “oh Y/N I ran into Magda she told me about your internship congratulations” a chorus of congratulations filled and she smiled but it didn’t reach her eyes she seems uncomfortable with the attention “thanks Rhys, I’m not sure if I’m going to take it though” she had been thrilled about that internship when she applied getting in was a huge accomplishment “Y/N/N you have to go, you where so exited about it” she fidgeted with her napkin the table was quite “I don’t know, what if I come back and everything is different?” I forgot anyone was around us “it’s only six months” I said hating that I had to say always yes it was ‘only’ six months but that would feel like a lifetime without her, she looked at me she didn’t take her eyes away from mine “but what if it is az” she looked terrified “maybe some things will change but the way we feel about you, is never going to change when you get back we will be here awaiting your return” someone cleared their throat in the background and from the way nesta hit cassian it was probably him I could feel rhysands violet eyes boring into me Y/N nodded “okay I’ll go” the conversation began to pick up again I tried to convince myself I did the right thing by telling her to go.

Rhys, cassian, and i ended up in his study at some point after dinner with cups of whiskey, cassian was telling a story to try and fill the odd silence that had ensued when Rhys cut him off “you love her don’t you?” I smiled sadly “of course I love her” Rhys nodded his head slowly “then why did you push her to go” cassian looked between us quickly not expecting the conversation change “Because i would do anything to make her happy and the internship will make her happy, but i think you know that” he just nodded again and poured me some more whiskey, “don’t give up on her brother”.

—————————————————————————————————————————

I wonder if I cross your mind

Half as much as you do mine

If I tell you the truth 

What will I lose?

I don’t know

I had been back from dawn court for a few weeks and as much as I loved the experience i was happy to be home i missed my family but i especially missed azriel my very best friend, I knocked on his door, we where supposed to meet I was a bit early but he told me to let myself in if I showed up early so I pulled out my key and opened the door, his place was kind of a mess which is very uncharacteristic of him, i decided to kill time cleaning up his place I picked up the clothes on his floor and did his dishes which where piled up in his sink, he didn’t have a single clean cup or plate and then I moved to his desk and started tidying papers most of them where reports that should be filed away but there was a stack of messily written note some where written like letters some where just written on tore off scraps of paper or the margins of newspapers, i didn’t want to pry but just as I was going to abandon the desk I saw my name sprawled across one of the papers I pulled the piece of paper out of the pile delicately like it would crumble out of my hands and I started reading;

My dearest Y/N,

Today is a Thursday, and I love you,

 I’ll love you today and tomorrow, and the next day, and even next week, 

In four months I will love you just like I loved you yesterday.

 40 years from now I will run my hands through my hair and smile at the thought of how much I love you.

 I just hope that you’ll be with me through all that time I love you.

My knees gave out and I sunk into the desk chair my shaking hand came to my trembling lips I started routing through the letters looking for my name again, where they all meant for me or was it a fluke? There was another;

Y/N

I’ve fallen for your laugh, which is utterly contagious I’ve fallen for your smile, which makes me giddy for no reason at all. I’ve fallen for our late night talks when 1am arrives far too quickly. I’ve fallen for our jokes which I’ll remember days later and burst into laughter. I’ve fallen for how you make my day better, even if I wanted to cry a minute before. I’ve fallen for every second I get to spend with you, even if those seconds will always leave you wanting more.

Y/N

I knew I did from the first moment we met it was… not love at first sight exactly- but familiarity like oh hello it’s you it’s always going to be you, and I waited for you my entire life and you where worth every minute, so please for the sake of my shattered and exhausted heart don’t leave me I will take anything you offer but I need you in my life you make me better.

My love 

It’s you it’s fucking you. I cannot describe it anymore, it is you. You are the only one I will ever want I belong with you, you are my home, I look at you and somehow I can see 100 years from now on the porch of some old house in the middle of nowhere and we are together. I need you, you are the only thing that matters. You are my good. And I will love you recklessly without words or empty phrases, I will love you with blazing truths and hopeless defiance and unapologetic beauty. I will love you forever and even when forever runs out.

There where more dozens more and I those alone had me sobbing he loved me, azriel, loved, me? “Y/N?” 

——————————————————————————————————————————

I wish I had sent you that drunk text at midnight 

I was just scared it would ruin our friendship 

But I really meant it 

I wonder how you would reply 

she spun to face me so face when I said her name it took me a second to register the tear tracks and red rimmed eyes “Az what is this?” My stomach dropped she was standing beside my desk holding one of my letters “you weren't supposed to see those” we remained standing on our separate sides of the room “they’re addressed to me” I had no response all I could do was stand in my living room and let everything fall apart “is it true?” She asked so quietly I nearly missed it my head slumped so did my wings behind me I wouldn’t lie to her and I wasn’t ready to face the rejection I nodded, then I heard her move and I could feel my heart start to break as I waited for her to leave because I wasn’t good enough I didn’t deserve her and now because of my stupid letters I was going to lose her friendship too, but instead of the creak of the door her warm body collided with mine her arms wrapped around my waist and held me tight, my entire body relaxed into her I buried my face in her hair that smelled like rain and pine and fresh baked cookies, discreetly wiping away the tears that had been threatening to fall, we dropped to the ground still tangled in each other she pulled away slightly and pressed her forehead to mine “you love me?” I laughed and shook me head at her “yes, I love you Y/N, i love you so so fucking much” she smiled and it warmed me from the inside out “good because I love you too” and with that she kissed me and I felt a snap, we pulled away for a second staring at each other in shock and then she laughed and it was the most joyous sound I had ever heard it was light and bubbly and it had me tackling her onto the carpet so I could kiss her again. She was it my mate, my mate and the love of my life and I was going to spend the rest of my life with her. 

“Az?” I hummed my arms where wrapped around her waist and I was half splayed on top of her naked body my wings spread out over the bed, I had been practicing purring a moment before when she had been combing her fingers through my hair, “can I have the letters?” My head shot up from its very comfortable spot on her chest “what no! They are so embarrassing” she pouted “please” I huffed then kissed her deeply, “fine, but you can’t read them when I’m in the room” she laughed then pulled me down to her “thank you” she batted her lashes over those pretty Y/e/c eyes and I started peppering her face in kisses while she laughed and tried to get away I stopped and looked into her eyes “I love you” she smiled softly and brushed my cheek with her hand “I love you too”. 

(Note/disclaimer: some of azriels letters are based on quotes or things I’ve seen before)

[itsswritten]

Cauldron-born.

“I hadn’t meant to hide this from you Rhysand,” Helion’s usual warm tone was replaced with something sterner, bolder— unwavering.

A breeze pulled on your skirt, the floaty material rippling under the wind. It was always warm in Day, but now, with the appearance of uninvited guests, there was a coldness in the air you hadn’t experienced before.

A bite that pulled at your skin raising goosebumps across your arms.

You guessed this reaction wasn’t a rare occurrence when facing the Night Courts Inner Circle.

Helion shifted his weight, his body stood in front of yours in a protective manner. A nervousness emitted from his energy, an emotion that actually seemed strange to even be associated with him.

Helion wasn’t the nervous type. Charming and flirtatious, bold and defiant— not nervous.

Helion pushed his shoulders back, his stance flexing against the shadowy group that had just arrived.

They had shaken him.

Perhaps you were naive to think these people wouldn’t, naive to believe you could live your life quietly. Slip through the cracks. Go unnoticed. No you were not destined for that, as much as your dear friend may have wanted that for you.

So if a quiet life was not meant to be, then you would at least claim it as yours.

With a light step you moved from behind Helion to his side, coming into full view of the group who had appeared unannounced in the courtyard. Your hand came to Helion’s gently, giving him a soft squeeze and light smile that stretched to your eyes.

How they had gotten through Day Courts shields didn’t come as a surprise really. Helion had divulged how powerful the High Lord of the Night Court was. That if he really wanted to take them all down, then Helion suspected in that unrelenting pit of power Rhys probably could.

But despite this power, Rhys had never ravaged control over the land. Helion was fond of Rhys and his family, they were allies. Perhaps he would even consider them friendly.

And yet Helion hadn’t told them about you.

Energies and rhythms rippled from their bodies, all with their own melody of colours unique to them floating towards you. Your eyes scanned over their features quickly, reading their expressions, the tight lines their faces made before one look pulled you to a hasty stop.

A hazel lock held you tightly as a males gaze ensnared you.

Golden rays broke through a midnight blue aura, trapping you in a moment that seemed to expand and retract all at once. He was the most beautiful male you’d ever laid eyes on, and it took every ounce of will power to pull your gaze from his.

There was a simmering at the pit of your stomach, something familiar and warm, and you swore you could hear singing—

“She is like us.” A female from the back of the crowd spoke, beautiful and sweet. Elain, you assumed. Her aura, one that resembled sunlight radiating in golden flicks. If you hadn’t known who she was you’d had assumed she was a Day court resident from her glow alone.

Elain stepped forward, another female stepping beside her as if they’d both been pulled by the same magnetic pulse to the front of the group.

This girl. This girl was Nesta. You were sure of it. That silver flickering aura licked at her skin, an energy so similar and yet so different to her sisters.

“Hm..no not exactly like us…” Elain seemed to mutter then, more to herself than anyone else. Her eyes scanning you as she tried to get a read, try and decipher what had pulled her here in the first place.

Why you had pulled them here.

“Something other.” Nesta spoke.

You don’t think she’d actually intended for it to sound so venomous, but the words had snapped like poison. You noticed how for a split second there was a softeness in her energy. Whether she was regretful of her tone or not, you had flinched at the word.

Other.

Hm. Perhaps that was the best way to describe you.

Elain glanced at her sister, her face not changing as she digested Nesta’s words. There was a shuffling behind them, only slight and small. Would barely be noticeable if it wasn’t so hard for you not to notice.

Him.

His scarred fingers twitched at his sides, shadows swirling around them as they peered over those giant black membranes that were drawn in at his back. A tattoo creeped up the side of his neck, peeking through his shirt as you followed up to his jaw. Black leather’s covered his body, blue siphons shimmering under the setting sun. You tried so hard not to let your eyes wander back, but as though you had no control you gaze landed on his.

Only to find he was already staring.

Azriel.

Helion had mentioned him to you before and you recalled how you had rolled the name a few times in your mouth. The name feeling so foreign and familiar all at once.l that you couldn’t help ripple the syllables on your tongue.

“Not cauldron-made, no not quite.” Elain had turned her attention back to you.

You had stepped forward now, stepped out from the shadow of Helion.

Stepped out to face what you had been avoiding.

“You are Cauldron-born.”

—

a/n: little rough draft of a new idea??! maybe?? I literally just came up with it and not really sure where I'm taking it hehe or if I even will. I know it's super vague so if an idea comes to mind when you read this then please share in the comment hehe

forever tags: @sleepylunarwolf @daily-dose-of-sass @alittlelostalittlefound-blog @milswrites @amberlynn98 @marscardigan @illyrianbitch @lilah-asteria

[acourtofmishapandmistakes]

Azriel, Giving You a Foot Rub

(A short blip)

You wedged your feet deeper into Azriel's lap, giving them a playful wiggle as you peered over your book. It was a clear bid for a foot massage.

Azriel, not even looking up from his own book, pulled off one of your socks and started massaging your feet with slow, circular motions.

You smiled to yourself and returned to reading.

But soon, Azriel’s massage efforts waned, and he just held your foot limply.

You shook your foot in his grip to remind him of his duty.

He sighed but resumed the massage.

After a bit, he slowed again, prompting you to put down your book. Azriel did the same.

“Can I help you?” he asked.

“You stopped rubbing,” you pointed out.

Azriel chuckled. “I was doing something.”

“You were reading. You can rub and read,” you argued.

Azriel flashed a mischievous smile, then flipped the script. He dumped your legs off his lap and replaced them with his own, pulling off his socks.

“Fair enough, you can rub my feet. Thanks, babe,” he said, settling back with his book.

You grumbled but began rubbing his feet as he let out contented moans.

[bloodycassian]

Reborn - Reader x Azriel. AN - thank you anon for this great prompt!

Requested - I don't know if your requests are open but I wanted to throw something in just in case.

An Azriel x reader, where AZ and reader have never met before, reader has been tortured and experimented on by the court of nightmares ( Keir ) she could be a shadowsinger, and they're mates, when the reader is in the verge of death for refusing to work with Keir, AZ feels it and begins to grow hectic without knowing the reason,  everyone in the inner court is confused until elain comes out of nowhere and tells everyone that his mate is in danger. ( Vision )

I have this on the back of my mind since reading some of your amazing work and couldn't stop thinking about it.

No amount of masturbation, drinking, or sparring helps the agitation under Azriel’s skin. It’s a constant, burning, itching thing that’s like a fucking disease upon his being. 

Sleep is his only relief, but even then he’s plagued with pain and darkness. It reminds him too much of the dank basement he’d been forced into when he was young, so he stays up. He’s exhausted and brooding and quick to snap at anyone who questions him. He knows he’s being a dick but according to the five healers he’d seen, there was nothing wrong. 

Nothing wrong, just like how his shadows weren’t some kind of magic, according to them. 

He’d refused to believe in healers all that much since the explanation Madja had given him about his diseased pets. The writhing, tentacles of night were a ‘bodily mutation of the highest level, tainted with fae magic’. Tainted. The word felt right for what they were, but that didn’t mean it stung any less. 

“We’ll invade here, and be able to plant our…” There was a beat of silence in Amren’s quick words, then her voice cut through his busybodied task like a knife “Azriel, are you even listening?” 

Truthfully, he hadn’t been. He’d been consumed by the ache again, the broiling sickness beneath his skin that had every muscle flexed in tension. His mind had other battles to fight. 

“What does it matter? You’ll carry out your plan with or without me. Keep talking, make yourself feel important, Amren.” His ill-tempered response came quick and laced with venom. One glance towards the small not-quite-fae female and his mind gave a twinge of regret. 

A lick of her power radiated, filling the room with something vibrant and undeniable. Cassian sucked in a breath, and a word from Rhys had her firey gaze snapping to him instead. “Take your dog from the important business then, High Lord.” Her words were precise, hissed. 

Azriel straightened. The insult didn’t land as well as Amren had wanted, in part because he couldn’t care less, another because the fire under his skin was reaching a peak that he had no idea how he survived every time it came around. He glanced to Rhys, who gave him a nod. Good. Let him free of this cage. 

He flung open the balcony doors with his cursed gift and sprinted off the ledge, launching himself into the summer air. 

+

Rats nibbled at your toes when you slept, scurrying away before you could catch them. Your senses weren’t even close to what they had been months ago. Before, you’d been able to catch at least two a week for extra sustenance. 

You told yourself that they’d learned, that they’d gotten quicker at their biting and fleeing. Truthfully, you could feel your strength waning every day. 

Living was no longer hope, and more of an inconvenience. 

But it was an inconvenience to Kier as well. And that meant you’d keep on living out of spite. 

The next female would appreciate it. 

“Arms up, legs together.” The order came with unnatural casualness that you’d grown used to. If you didn’t follow the orders, you were beaten until you either complied or were unconscious, so complying was really the only option. Especially when you were attempting to stay alive for as long as you could. 

It’s for the next girl. You chanted to yourself when the keeper made the injection. It stung like hundreds of bees attacking the same place, but the pain was familiar. A friend you welcomed before everything went sideways and the nausea rolled in. 

The drug Kier’s men gave was like none you’d experienced outside this cell. An incredible high, with a disastrous low. 

You convulsed on the floor moments later, your body still barely able to take the amount they dosed you with. You’d seen the liquid inside the damn thing grow each week, they were marking your progress with every one of them. So, with each dosing you made sure to put on some dramatics for them. 

The clawing at the throat was false, the sound of your screams only half-forced. The real, unforced reaction though, was always the shade of pallor your skin turned after every injection. The darkness that radiated from you like a bubble, the pain made physical. 

It hovered over your skin like an aura, tendrils of it washing over your forehead when the sweating started. It always started like this, for the first few hours - or possibly minutes, you weren’t sure once you were lost to the pain - they’d observe, and sometimes Kier himself would join, looking like a disappointed mother. Then, once the shaking subsided, and you were able to breathe normally, they’d release a rabbit into your cell. 

The same rabbit almost every damn time. After the first two weeks, you’d grabbed the first one and snapped it’s neck, hoping that Kier would be happy with the accomplishment and you’d earn something. You’d felt awful as it died in your hands, but the pain… if it stopped the pain, you’d kill anything. 

But time after time, they’d send in another rabbit, and though you begged for some kind of explanation of what they wished with the damn thing, they’d only observe. After a few hours of investigating, it’d eventually be removed and you’d wake up alone again.

Kier did not make an appearance today, and after your shaking stopped, neither did a rabbit.

“Where’s dinner?” You croaked, the tears stinging small cuts on your cheeks. Your friend never laughed or spoke, hardly even moved when he was in the vicinity of your cell. It was odd, even for a freak who enjoyed drugging and torturing others.

The male only stared, writing in his little notebook. He could at least humor you and tell you what he was so keenly logging. Some friend.

He opened the door, but instead of the rabbit jumping inside, he stepped forward, past the barrier and wards keeping you from breaking through. Your breathing halted. 

“Your reluctance to learn your gifts has given us no other option.”

+

“Did you lose a fight?” 

Nesta’s words normally bounced and slid right off Azriel, but with how volatile he was feeling, it took all his restraint not to snarl at her.

“Come on Az, where’s that quick wit?” She chided, crossing her legs at the knee beside her sister. 

His eyes drifted to Elain, the warm blush of her cheeks. Her lavender nightshirt made her seem so much more vulnerable than she was. He knew just how lethal the female could be, and admired her for it. His eyes drifted to the soft hair and round features that he’d once dreamt of. How foolish he’d been, how full of hope and bitterness. Now here he was, merely a ghost. A shell for pain to be housed in and nothing more. 

And here he stared at a garden of hope and light. The female who’d haunted his dreams for years. The opposite of the steel bitch that sat beside her. 

A pang of guilt pinched at him. “You’re ridiculous.” Was all he could muster at her. Nesta was trying to help, in her own way, he supposed. She was testing his limits and temper, even while balancing comforting words and attempting to heal her little sister’s mental wounds. Not to mention navigating the strange, untrained gift of Elain’s.

It wasn’t often that Azriel came to the house of wind proper. When he did, he usually confined himself to the dining area and the war room, where the formal dinners and meetings were held. He hadn’t walked the halls into the large internal library in a long, long while. No wonder they both had turned their chairs to face him when he’d cracked the door to find them both here. 

The large windows seemed crowded with the amount of books that surrounded them. The only source of light, aside from the twinkling magic fueled ones above. The room had always made Azriel feel claustrophobic, and now it set him on edge in a way different than it had before. 

Especially when Elain’s eyes bored into his own. His skin felt like it was shifting, pulling and pushing from just beneath. He was beginning to wonder if the healers had somehow missed a parasite of some kind. Something new perhaps, something they’d never seen before.

Elain’s eyes widened, her cheeks going from the pink blush to sickly pale in an instant. Her expression was unfocused, hazy - as if she were drunk. Azriel suddenly felt like he was intruding, like seeing her so vulnerable was something reserved for only those close to her. 

Nesta placed a hand on her shoulder and rubbed her sister’s back comfortingly. It was about as tender as Azriel had ever seen her, even with Cassian. He watched the hands that rubbed the Seer, recalling the intense desire he’d once felt for her. Embarrassment coated his cheeks, distracting him from the physical pain for a moment.

He’d wanted to be that support for her, once. Nesta’s hand seemed to grow in his vision, the embroidered collar of Elain’s nightshirt with it. He blinked rapidly, trying to refocus. The blackness around his eyes did not recede though. His bones ached, and his headache stabbed at him like a branding iron. He rubbed his temple, squeezing his eyes shut. 

“She needs help.” Elain gasped, coughing on a breath. Azriel wavered on his heels, something hard hitting his back, crushing his wings. 

He could barely hear the high strung sound of Elain’s voice. “She needs help, Azriel!”

+

He tore though the court, dragging Kier kicking and frothing with him. He’d received a few severe wounds from the cruel male, but nothing that a few patches of his siphons couldn’t hold together. 

The gushing stab wounds could wait. He had something far more important to tend to.

“You’re a bastard, a low-born inconsequential bastard, Shadowsinger.” Kier coughed as Azriel dragged his broken body with him. The crowd pushed and writhed around them, but his outstretched dagger kept any of the patrons from advancing. Several dark looks, hisses of death closed in around him, but he plowed through them all, working his way to the catacombs behind the stone chair that served as Rhys’s dark throne. 

“I may be a bastard-” Azriel grunted through his pain, now more fevored and intense than before. It was a wonder he’d even been able to make it here, but it did explain his sloppy handling of Kier once he’d found the male. 

“But at least I didn’t sell a daughter off as stock.” He tossed the would-be-king to the locked door of the catacombs, a part of him enjoyed the thunk his head made against the stone floor, even through the intense agony that ripped through him. 

This was not the place to show weakness. If he let his shadows drop, let the air of anything but a cold hearted killer go for even a moment he’d be trampled by the crowd. 

Kier rose slowly, muttering curses while he pulled out a key and slid the door to the side. He sketched a bow, waving Azriel in. Spit landed at Azriels feet as he crossed the threshold, and he hesitated in his step. A hiss rang out behind him, shuffling feet a song as the crowd quickly scooted back. He held his stance there for a moment, collecting the wrath that built in him. It writhed and twisted in his mind, his guts, his teeth throbbing with the urge to tare out Kier’s throat. 

The blistering heat flared again, this time in his jaw and he moved down the hall, towards the cells that an unfortunate assistant to Kier had described. 

He’d made their death quick, painless. 

+

You couldn’t scream, could hardly breathe with the weight that seemed to be growing in your chest. 

Not weight exactly, more like pressure. Internal pressure, like there was lava built up inside you with nowhere to go. And every rattling breath seemed to give it more life. You wheezed, weak with the exhaustion of fighting it. 

Your friend had given you three more of the injections, and promptly left when you began struggling against the binds at your hands and feet. One of them had ripped, you only knew because that was the hand that you’d used to claw at your chest with. 

The blood made going any further too slippery and exhausting.

There were far away sounds, but it all seemed too strange, so disjointed to be real. Screams and sharp clangs of metal, breaking glass and thudding. 

Your eyes slipped closed, and relief washed over you. The pressure eased, and the squeaky hinges of the door opened. Had death finally come? Was this the end of your cycle, and now they were bringing in a new victim to Kier’s experiments? 

There wasn’t much of a goodbye to the world, though. As sad as it was to not be able to see your family again, you were just grateful that the pain was receding. That finally there’d be no injections, no innocent rabbit and certainly no Kier around. 

The sounds were strange, a choking, strangled sound like the first time you’d killed the rabbit. Your eyes cracked open almost involuntarily to see what had happened. 

Outside your cell in a glow of blue light was a winged male, his hand wrist deep inside your friend’s chest. 

+

Blood is hotter than most people think it is. Azriel takes joy in it though, when it’s the blood of the truly vile ones. The male with the syringes and log book reeked of something spiced and foreign, something Azriel’d never encountered before. He would have asked, would have talked to the male if he’d not pulled a knife and threatened to ‘kill her’ as he backed away. 

There were no thoughts after that. And as he fell to the floor, Azriel reveled in the male’s labored breathing. Relief and heat flooded him, prickling him with a soaring joy he’d thought abandoned him long ago. He could laugh, if it weren’t for the absurdity of how it sounded to laugh at this moment.

 He plucked the book from his hands and shoved it into his belt behind him, his chest thrumming with joy.

He’d never been so filled with glee before, so overwhelmed with it after killing… Had he become broken in a sick way? Was he no better than the male he’d just killed? He looked to his hand, twisting it in the low light of his siphons. 

A wet, weak cough echoed off the walls and he spun, knife ready. 

Then the blade was on the floor as he rushed to the bars of the cell door, ripping it free of the rusted hinges. 

The female was gaunt, and frail. Yet his chest sang and though she looked moments from death, he couldn’t imagine more beauty. 

She clutched her chest, the blood there crusted and dry. “Thanks.” She croaked, voice barely a whisper. Shadows mounted around him, enclosing them in complete black. He would have thought he was winnowing if it weren't for the sorry excuse for a bed that stayed beneath her.

Azriel’s lips were moving, but he couldn’t tell what he was saying, even to his own ears. His mind, his body was a rushing river of every emotion at once, all cascading through his mind, to his chest and thrumming in his blood. Her eyes went wide and wild, searching his for a moment. His heart thundered in his ears.

What had his life been until now? Why was this moment such a climax to him so suddenly? All of it, the pain the agony, the stark moments of joy against it all - the brief moments of shared happiness that made it all worth it tore through his body like a flash floor. 

Tears pricked his eyes, and it was a curious thing to see them fall onto her neck and wash away the blood there. 

Then, a wet sigh from her lips, and her eyes stopped searching his. The rush of joy and sense of sanctuary ceased. His blood went quiet in his ears, and the room felt suddenly cold. The room silent around him, not even his shadows dared whisper.

His fingers hesitated over her cheek. When her next breath did not come, he shook her gently. Her eyes remained, staring blankly at the ceiling. 

This was truly a tomb now. 

“No…” He heard his own words that time. The word clattered through the cell like a bell tolling, echoing.

“Take her back.” A shadow hissed over his ear, caressing. 

He shook her again, the tears boiling over now, panic gripping him. 

“We know how.” another said. This voice was different, the same whispered tone and suggestion, but this was not one of his pets. He sent his own shadows skittering away, and a group of them stayed, unbound to him and unmoving from the cell. His heart skipped, fear upon fear pulling him into the icy abyss of despair. 

His own shadows returned, a broken syringe floating to him on their behest. They mingled with the others, reveling and dancing together though Azriel felt that he was slowly sinking.

“What am I supposed to do with this?!” He shouted at them, at nothing. He had truly lost his mind, hadn’t he?

“Save her.” The strange shadows told him. Just like Elain had said, overtaken by her visions.

 A tendril of the foreign shadow wrapped around his hand, locking the glass pieces there and slicing into his palm. The needle aimed directly to her chest, between the ribs, only a few inches from the heart. 

And what did he have to lose? The silence that surrounded him now was almost worse than the pain had been. Wouldn't pain at least be better than complete nothingness? To feel completely blank and unwritten as a being?

With a breath, and a part of his siphon’s power to support the broken syringe, he pushed into her skin. His own blood dribbled down the sides, mixing with hers. Through and through - until he knew that he’d met the same depth of a killing blow to an opponent’s heart. 

+

“Side, block, strike.” Cassian’s orders came out in demanding, practiced tones. Each step, each swipe of your blade met with one of Azriel’s shadows as a shield. 

His were still much, much stronger than yours, even after months of practice with them. Even with him showing you very intimately just how much they were capable of. Your cheeks blushed at the reminder of that. 

“No distractions, keep that shadow talk in the bedroom, Az.” Cassian scolded.

A smirk played at your mate’s face, and he hit you with a surprise swipe at your feet, left unprotected by your own shadows. 

You fell on your ass, cursing. 

Azriel offered a hand, panting at the exertion the sparring had taken. You were proud of that, at least. 

The first six months of training had been dedicated to building stamina, gaining back weight and muscle while balancing training your shadows to obey you. Six months ago, being able to spar with your mate had seemed like a far off dream that you’d never be capable of doing. 

But with his training, and Cassian’s encouragement, you were almost able to take him on stride for stride. Almost. 

So, you took his hand and pulled him towards you for a kiss. Then knocked his knees out from behind with a wave of your own shadows.

You smirked, and offered him a hand while Cassian boomed with laughter.

He allowed you to help him up, but cleaned in close, pecking a kiss on your cheek. 

“You’ll pay for that later.” He said in an intimate tone. A lick of his shadow wrapped around your thigh, snaking upwards. 

“Promise?” Your eyes sparkled at him, and the pain all those months ago had been worth it for this. 

[euphoricpixiee]

So I’m writing the most angsty thing….and it’s for Azriel 😭 do y’all want a teaser of it???

[acourtofinkandpapyrus]

My Little Shadow: Epilogue/ Part fifteen (Azriel x Reader) Final Part

Warnings: OOF, jealous Elain, smut, smut AND MORE SMUT- Oral, F-receiving, fingering, shadow bondage play, and Y/N losing her virginity to her mate!

Part fourteen (I will be starting another series once the vote I started ends, you can find it here

Tag list: @mis-lil-red @bubybubsters @luvmoo @rorel1a @minakay @foreverrandomwritings Note! If any of you want to be on my Azriel tag list for *any* stories involving him, please message me! I'm still new to tag lists 😅

After healing, you and Azriel find some alone time, and talk about the future a little bit.

I couldn’t help but laugh as I felt cool hands wrap around my midsection, hugging me from behind.

Azriel pulled me into a hug, nuzzling my neck and breathing in my scent.  “Hello, what have you been up to?”  He asked in a pleased tone of voice.

I was told Rhys had found us in the hall, the both of us passed out from our injuries.

Apparently, the collapse had killed all those people following Meave, and of course Meave herself.

With Madja’s help, we had healed extraordinarily fast, almost none of my injuries had scarred over, healed over as if they had never been there in the first place.

Except for my hands, which now matched Azriel’s.

“Not much, just reading.”  I say with a grin, putting down the book I had been so invested in.

He chuckled, and I sighed sadly as he pulled away, taking his warmth with him.

“I’m going to have to go again, I’m needed at the townhouse.”  He said, petting my hair comfortingly.

I couldn’t help but to whirl around, biting my lip in worry.  “Will Elain be there?”  I ask, trying to seem less worried about it than I am, even though it’s a lost cause.

He frowns a bit, worry crinkling his brow.  “I promise you Y/N, there is nothing there.  I love you, and only you.”

I looked away, crossing my arms, I knew I looked pouty, but I didn’t care.  “It’s not you I’m worried about.”

Elain had been strange to me since Azriel and I announced the bond, and if I didn’t know any better she was purposely trying to make my life hard at times.

“I’m sorry my little shadow, but you know that you’re the only one I want, right?”  He said, smiling down softly at me.

I don’t know what spurs me, but I say with the utmost confidence, “Why don’t you show me then?”

His eyes go wide, and I immediately think I’ve gone too far, getting ready to run off and hide.

He pulls me forward and traps my mouth in his, kissing me deeply and exploring my mouth with his tongue.

I shiver as he pulls away, his eyes darkened with lust.  “When I get back shadow, I’ll show you exactly how much I want you.”

And with that he disappears, leaving me with my legs snapped shut tightly and hands shaking.

I make an effort to not think about Azriel while he's gone, one so I don’t worry about Elian, and two, so I don’t look flustered all evening.

I head down to the library, helping Nesta and Gwen with random chores.

“So what’s it like being mated to Azriel?”  Nesta asked as I lifted a particularly heavy set of books.

I tried not to blush as I flashed back to that look he had given me earlier, the way my breath had caught in my chest when he did.

“It’s nice.  I love him a lot.”  I said, hoping to quickly change the subject to something else.

“So you two have a plan to make the mating bond official then?”  She raised a brow, as if to ask me why I’d been holding out on her.

I blink in surprise.  “I hadn’t really thought about it.”

Nesta smiles comfortingly.  “That’s fine, but you’re inviting me, no matter what you plan.”

I giggle, “Of course I will, I wouldn’t dream of leaving you out of something so important.”

Something so important that neither Azriel or I have brought up.

I was quiet after that, thinking of ways to bring it up to Azriel.  That I wanted to be his mate, for the rest of our immortal lives.

The edge of my mouth quirked up at the thought.  I think I would like that.

I had spent hours in the library with Nesta, and as I made my way back to the river house, I saw something in a storefront that made me stop in my tracks.

It was a lingerie shop.

Azriel and I hadn’t done anything of this sort yet, after everything that happened, I don’t think Azriel wanted to push me into something I wasn’t ready for.

Biting my lip, I look at the dark lacy set on the mannequin.

I made it back to the little place Azriel and I were calling home.  I paused in the doorway when I caught a fresh wave of his scent.

I grinned, sending my shadows out to look for him.

We had this game, him and I.  We would see who would hide from the other the best.

So while my shadows searched, as did I.  Though, I quickly realized he wasn’t in any of the main rooms.

“Az?”  I called out, giving up for today.

I just wanted him to hold me in his arms, tell me how much he loved me.

One of his shadows found me, gently wrapping around my wrist and tugging me upstairs.  Toward the bedroom.

My thighs clench together, and I take a deep breath, concentrating on getting up the stairs and finding Azriel.

The shadows tugged me toward my bedroom, the door already cracked.

Leaving me, they slid back into the room.  My shadows follow them in, and I’m standing there, biting my lip.

I finally step forward, opening the door to see Azriel lounging in my bed, book in hand.

He didn’t look up as I entered, and I realized he was reading one of the romance novels I had told him was my favorite.

“Hello Little Shadow, what took you so long?”  He asked, his voice low and seductive.

I opened my mouth, then closed it again, fussing with the end of my shirt.  “I was helping out at the library in the house of wind.  You’re not usually home this early.”

He stood, stalking over to me.  “After your request?  How could I leave you waiting?”  He asked, his breath hitting the shell of my ear, making me shiver.

His hands went to my waist, bringing me closer until we were touching.  “What do you want Y/N?”  He asked, his pupils wide with love as he brought a hand up to brush away a strand of hair.

“This.”  I gasped as his other hand grazed my side.  He must have smelled my arousal that was now pooling in my panties, because he grew taught, as if he was holding himself back.

“Hmmmm.”  He said, leaning down to nuzzle my neck.  I moved, granting him access as he planted kisses and little nips there, making me pant.

“I love you so much Y/N.”  He whispered into my skin, making my eyes roll into the back of my head, pressing my thighs together.

He went to move one of his beautiful hands down my pants, and one of my shadows wrapped around his wrist as I gasped, “Stop-”

Suddenly, he took his hand back, and stopped kissing my neck, his eyes wide in worry.  “Are you alright?  I’m so sorry- I-”

I shake my head.  “No- no.  That’s not it.”  I say, still breathing heavily.  “It’s just… I’ve never done… this, before.”

I swallow thickly, expecting him to look disappointed.  But instead, his eyes gain a predatory glint, which has me struggling to stay standing.

“If anything gets to be too much, you tell me, okay?”  He asks, half growling, and I nod.

He picked me up, and I straddled his waist, whimpering as I felt the hardness of him through the layers of clothes separating us.

I make a little noise of protest as he lifts me away, but he quickly places me on the bed, and I love the way he looks, towering over me with eyes only for me, tracing my form.

“Let's get these clothes off, hmm?”  He said, running his calloused thumb along my jaw and tipping my chin up.

I can’t help the sly smile on my face as I peel my shirt off, revealing the top part of the beautiful black lacy set I had bought on impulse.

The decision was a good one, I decide as I see Azriels face as he growls with desire.

I shimmy out of my pants, and Azriel helps, and he just stares at me for a minute afterward, taking it all in.

My cheeks turn red, and I realize he can see all me scars, ever single one.

It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen the ones littering my arms and legs, but this was different, I was more… vulnerable.

I go to sit up, but he leans forward, kissing me passionately as he runs his hands up the planes of my stomach.

“You’re so beautiful shadow, and I’m never going to let anyone else lay their hands on you again.”  He says after pulling back, and then he goes over and starts kissing where the tattoo from our bargain curls over my shoulder bone.

He undoes the latch on the bra, whipping it off and I gasp, melting into a moan as he lowers his mouth to my breast, taking my nipple into his mouth and rolling it gently with his tongue, teasing the other one with his hand.

He stayed there for a while, building me up until I just couldn’t stand it anymore, reaching for him.

I gasp as both my and his shadows wrap around my wrists, pinning them above my head.

Azriel looks up at me, grinning before he nips at my breast in reprimand.

“I’m gonna take my time with you baby, I’ma make you feel real good.”  He said at my whimper, trailing down and planting kisses as he reached the panties, taking his thumb and pressing lightly through the fabric, making me gasp as he hit that bundle of nerves.

Shadows slither around to my breasts, teasing me and leaving a cold trail in their wake.

Az pulls the panties off, and I have no time to react as he places his mouth on my wet heat, tasting me with little licks.

I moan, hips bucking as his thumb comes up to rub tight circles around my clit.

Even though I had never done this before, I knew that no one else would have ever been able to make me feel this good.

He pulled back, looking up at me as he licked his lips.  “Enjoying the show, shadow?”

Before I can respond, my eyes are rolling into the back of my head as he stuck a finger in me, pumping slowly.

He growled in pure satisfaction as he listened to the noises of pleasure I was making.

After a minute, he stuck another finger in, stretching me out blissfully as he placed his mouth on my clit, licking it teasingly before pulling it fully into his mouth, moaning around me in a way that made me see stars.

Pumping harder, he brought me over the edge, and I cried out his name in bliss, revealing in this new feeling.

He was softer as he pleasured me through the waves of pleasure crashing into me.

I was panting when he pulled away, his shadows freeing me.  He pulled me up against his chest, and looked down at me longingly.  “May I, shadow?”

I whimpered and nodded, and he took a step back, making quick work of undressing. 

My mouth went dry at the size of him.  I wondered if it would even fit, but I knew that I would make it.

He had beautiful tattoos on his chest, and when he stepped closer again, I traces them with my fingers lightly.

His wings flared slightly before they settled behind his back.

I smiled at the dark, beautiful male I could call my own.

“I want to make the bond official.”  I said, looking to his face to gauge his reaction.

His expression softened into something soft, and he smiled a little bit.  “Then we will.”  He said, gently nudging my legs open.

“I would do anything for you Y/N.  Anything to make you happy.”

I glow in his praise, and he slowly nudges at my entrance.  I gasp, wincing a little as he enters me slowly, stretching me out in all the right ways.

“Move.”  I beg, and he chuckles.

“I have to go slow, shadow.  Hold onto me.”  He says, and I wrap my arms around his neck as he slowly pulled out, and then pushed in all the way, making me moan lewdly.

He grinned against me neck as he did it again, and again, going just a little bit faster with each stroke.

I moaned as the shadows came back to my chest again, and azriel used his fingers on my clit as he shifted, hitting me even deeper than before.

“Azriel- Azriel, I’m gonna cum-”  I said through moans, barely able to think straight.

“Good.”  He growled, thrusting harder, if not a little less smooth as he neared his release too.

I spotted his wings, and I remember something Feyre had told me and grinned mischievously.  I reached a hand out, grazing his wings lightly until he gasped, groaning as he thrust into me hard, and we both toppled over into bliss together.

After we rode it out, I shivered and let out another moan as he pulled me off, carrying me into the bathroom to get us cleaned up.

He set me on the counter and started a bath running, and I couldn’t help but admire the way his muscles shifted under his beautiful skin.

He noticed and chuckled, coming back over to place a kiss on my forehead.  “What type of mating celebrations would you like, darling?”  He asked, and I grinned.

I really did have him wrapped around my finger, didn’t I?

“I’m not sure yet, but Nesta sort of invited herself, so I guess we’ll have to invite your brothers and her sisters too.”

He huffed a laugh, pressing a feather light kiss onto my puffy lips.  “We have all the time to decide my little shadow, and I’ll love whatever you decide.”

“Because I love you.”

[lanitalay]

Before I Say Goodnight Chapter 6

a/n: this is the longest one yet and also my favorite. enjoyyyyy

Word count: 3.5k

warnings: brief mention of a toxic relationship

Other chapters

“When do we leave” 

“Tomorrow after breakfast” you were giddy with excitement. “Are we going to the Manor?” You hoped he said yes, wanting to see the exiles. “Yes, I’ll drop you off there for a day while I take care of something further south and then I’ll pick you up on my way back. How does that sound?” “A bit tame but a million times more fun than what I’m doing here” he looks at you, unimpressed. You smile sheepishly. 

You’re so excited for a change of pace that you barely register the fact that you’ll be flying with Azriel having grown accustomed to being winnowed. It’s only when he motions for you to get closer to him that your stomach drops. “You better fly steady or I’m walking” you warn as he picks you up. “I’ll do my best, y/n”. 

“Welcome back, realm traveler” Jurian greets as he opens the door to the Manor. You smile and throw your bag into his arms. He huffs, expecting a hug instead. “I just couldn’t stay away from your pretty face” finishing the sentence with a wink. He seems to appreciate the compliment, leaving to go put your bag in your room. “I better be on my way, y/n” Azriel pulls you from your scan of the Manor, nothing has changed in the two long weeks you’ve been gone. You frown “so soon? I thought you’d at least have lunch or something” he shakes his head “I need to get there as soon as possible. But listen, stay near the house, don’t go into the woods alone and if you encounter someone you don’t know, lie. About your name, where you’re from, everything. These lands are vulnerable to… intruders as of late. Present company included” he adds the jab at the end in an effort to lighten the suddenly heavy mood. He offered to bring you here to get some fresh air and a change of pace but now that he has to leave you… he doesn’t want to. So close to tumultuous Spring and villages still recovering from war with only Lucien, Jurian and Vassa to offer any protection. He pulls a small dagger that he always keeps concealed in his boot and hands it to you “keep this on you at all times, don’t hesitate to use it”. Your eyes go wide and you grab it but you don’t know how to wield a knife, not to hurt someone “I wouldn’t even know how to use it though”. “When we get back home I’ll give you some lessons but still, keep it with you” you nod, placing it between your sock and your boot. “I’ll be back tomorrow in the afternoon” he stands with his arms stiff at his back, not sure how to say goodbye, he settles for a pat on your shoulder and leaves. His shadows linger a bit and curl around your legs and arms, more affectionate than their master. “He’s so ridiculous, you are perfectly safe here” Jurian blurts as he reappears. “He’s sweet” you defend your friend “sure, sure, come on, I’m going into town. You can take Lucien’s horse” at that you smile. You haven’t been with another human except Jurian and he barely counts as human. 

The ride was fun, you managed to follow Jurian with only a few minor hiccups. Your horse  stopped to eat and when you tried to get it to move you accidentally spooked it and it tried to throw you off. But it was so much more exciting than the long days in the stuffy library. “What are we going to do?” You ask as you see smoke appear in the distance, you must be nearing the village then “oh I need to get bread, milk, meats, other foods”. We are grocery shopping, yay. 

In all fairness it was a fun outing. Jurian got everything he needed and then some. “What’s for dinner” you asked, stomach grumbling rather loudly. “Soup and bread”. That sounds divine. The human lands were still warm enough for light clothing during the day but now that the sun was setting there was a creeping cold weaving its way into the house. You go up to your room and grab a sweater from your bag. 

When you walk into the kitchen Jurian tasks you with getting firewood for the hearth. “Doesn’t Lucien usually light it?” it was dark out and you were ashamed to admit that the woods creeped you out at this time. “Does it look like Lucien is here to light it?” He’s so moody. “Fine, I’ll go” that did irk you though. You hadn’t seen Lucien or Vassa since you’d arrived. You make your way to the small shack where the firewood was stored and grabbed as many logs as you could carry, cursing at yourself for managing to get at least three splinters. “You’re new” a low voice echoed and from the fright you dropped the logs, all of them landing on your foot. “Fucking hell” you winced as you tried to put weight on it but it just caused you more pain. A low chuckle caressed your ears and fury burned in your chest. “I heard rumors about a fourth exile but as for first impressions go this has been-” a tall, a very very tall auburn haired male stepped out of the shadows and looked you up and down “underwhelming”. You pick up the wood in a haste and limp back to the house “I don’t know what you’re talking about”. Jurian could take him. I hope. I just need to get close enough to scream. “My brother has always found himself in the company of misfits” he approaches you in three easy steps and takes the wood from your hands “but adding a defenseless human to the mix is a bad move, objectively speaking. You’re a liability” Brother? You grit your teeth, patience was never your strong suit and this male was getting on your very last nerve. “Who the hell are you?” He takes a step back “Apologies, I’m Eris Vanserra” Lucien’s brother. You didn’t know the details, but his brothers had a terrible reputation in the Night Court. You continue your limp into the house and call out “Jurian you have company!” There’s panic in your voice, Azriel’s words from earlier ringing in your ears. Jurian walks out and sags when he sees Eris “Oh, hello Eris. Lucien isn’t here”. Eris places the logs in the hearth and with a flick of the wrist throws a glowing ember towards it. Soon enough the room is engulfed by the warmth of the fire. “I’ll wait then” he walks towards one of the couches and sits. “What happened to you?” Jurian looks at your weary stance “I dropped the wood on my foot”.  He rolls his eyes and you hear him muttering to himself as he walks back into the kitchen. You sit on the couch opposite of Eris, taking off your boot to see if anything was broken. You grimace when you take your sock off and see blood coming from the beat up nail on your big toe. Great, a broken toenail. You try to wiggle your toe but the pain won’t let you. And a broken toe. You look at the red haired male and scowl “this is your fault”. He raises his eyebrows “I don’t see how it’s my fault, but that looks unpleasant”. “It feels unpleasant” you sit there, unsure of what to do. It hurts to walk but you have to wash the blood off. With a deep breath you get up and limp towards the stairs “let me help you” he approaches you but you hold out your hand to stop him “you’ve done enough”. He steps away and says “I’ll get you a bucket and some cloth so you can clean that thing down here”. That would be more convenient. “If you insist” and sit back down. 

Eris returns with the first aid materials and places them in front of you then sits back down on the opposite couch. You are pleasantly surprised when you place your foot in the water and it is a nice warm temperature. You clean it up as best you can and then wrap it up with the cloth. “I hope you’re not waiting for me to thank you, this is the least you could do” he shrugs “I don’t expect anything”.  That’s when you hear footsteps approaching and soon enough Lucien and Vassa are walking through the door. “Y/n!” Vassa exclaims and walks over to you but stops as she spots the bloody water, the wrapped foot and the Autumn heir. “What happened?” Lucien asks and you tell him more or less the events of the night. “And why are you both here?” You answer “visiting” and Eris answers “we have things that need to be discussed”. 

Lucien took Eris to the library and shut the door while Vassa kept you company. “It’s so nice to see you again. How are things going with the research?” You fiddle with your sleeves “the priestesses are doing the best they can but it’s… slow”. Vassa nods “I’m sorry, and how is the Night Court treating you?” At that you perk up a bit “it’s great, they’ve really taken me in and made me feel comfortable, Azriel was the one who brought me here because I was going stir crazy in that library” she offers you a smile “I’m glad”. After dinner Lucien offered to carry you to your bed citing that “you’ll probably fall down the stairs and break your whole leg if you do it yourself”. He seemed tense after talking to Eris. 

The following morning your foot was feeling a lot better, it was pretty sore but you could walk. No longer limping around. The morning routine was the same, breakfast with the boys and then they went about their business. Azriel was supposed to pick you up later today so you had time to do something. After testing your foot out you decide that you’ll take a walk around the Manor. It was a beautiful day and by nightfall you’d be back in the mountain top castle with zero trees around. You stay on the path, remembering just how badly things ended last time you didn’t, stopping only when you saw a pond. A beautiful pond that beckoned you to swim in it. You hadn’t swam in ages. And the pond looked so inviting and refreshing after walking for who knows how long. You approach it and look around, making sure nobody is nearby. Unbuttoning the shirt you were wearing and kicking off your boots at the same time like there was no time to lose. You had to get in, you had to swim, you had to- “are you trying to kill yourself?” Frozen in place you look toward the voice. What is he doing here? “No, I was just going for a swim” Eris’ eyes look like they are about to fall from his face for a second before he composes himself again “what?” “There are about twenty different creatures that would love to have you for lunch in that pond” you look from him to the beautiful inoffensive pond. “Yeah right” you continue to unbutton your shirt. He grabs your hand, his touch surprisingly soft and warm “yes, I’m right. That pond is about a mile deep and connects to an underground cave system, it is a trap for humans like you and animals looking for water” Trap. Run. Run. Run. Suddenly feeling self conscious  of your half undressed state you begin to button up your top and mumble “if you say so”. “I do. Let me walk you back to the house” you raise an eyebrow at him “from what my brother said, you are important to the Night Court for mother knows what reason and I need to maintain my alliance with them. If you get yourself killed they will surely pin it on me and I am not having that, so let’s go. We don’t have to talk” you nod, having zero faith in your survival skills at this point. “How did you find me?” he looks to you from the corner of his eye and says “you have a very peculiar scent, and I was walking towards the Manor when I caught it”. “Thank you” he looks at your foot “glad to see the injury was short lived” and flashes you a teasing grin. “It still hurts, but it is better. Still your fault though” he stops and turns to you “I just saved your life, think we can call it even?” and holds out his hand for you to shake. You think for a moment but quickly come to the conclusion that you simply cannot afford any enemies right now so you reach for his hand. It’s nearly nightfall when Azriel arrives. You quickly say your goodbyes and jump in his arms, ready to get back to the House of Wind. The flight was pleasant and you briefly went over what happened to your foot. You didn’t bring up the pond incident or anything relating to Eris. 

When you land at the House of Wind you quickly go to your room, dying to take a bath. You go through a routine that gets more familiar everyday: picking out your pajamas, bathing, brushing your hair, brushing your teeth, picking out an outfit for the following day, looking out the window until your eyes start to feel droopy and then you look at one of the pictures on your phone for  no more than fifteen seconds and go to sleep. Everything was flowing perfectly until you went to look at the nightly picture and discovered that your phone won’t turn on. No. No. No. Not today. Not now. You could have sworn you still had ten percent before you left for the human lands, that should have lasted at least three more days. Oh god.  The familiar dryness in your throat returned, your chest felt tight and you sensed that the room was caving in on you. You walk backwards, away from your bedside table and into the dresser, knocking over a vase with the force. You catch it before it falls to the ground and then smash it against the wall. Anger and frustration taking over you. Everyday you lose a little bit more of yourself and your world. You can barely hear as your door opens and it takes a few breaths for you to focus on the figure in front of you. “What’s wrong?” Azriel. “It’s dead” it’s off putting how unemotional your tone is. “What’s dead?” He pries softly. “My phone, it’s the only thing with images of my family and friends and world and the battery died” he still doesn’t fully understand but he gently grabs your hand and leads you to the love seat in front of the wall of windows. “I would look at a picture everynight before bed and it would calm me down, give me a good memory to focus on before falling asleep. Now it's gone” he nods “is it broken?” You shake your head “no, but it ran out of battery and from what I’ve seen there is no electricity here so I can’t charge it” once you finish the sentence the tears start to pour and Azriel beckons the house for tissues.

“Tell me about it” You sniffle and furrow your brows “about what?” He offers you another tissue “your life, you’ve told me about your world but I know nothing of your life”. Oh. “Uhm, well it wasn’t much compared to all of this-” “Don’t do that” he’s serious with his tone “do what?” “Diminish yourself like that, you are the most fascinating being I’ve ever encountered and you speak of yourself like you are your own burden” you swallow, not really having a response to that “I don’t know what to say”.  “Just tell me about your life, please” you gulp and try to think of where to start “Ok so you already know I had a dog, she was the best. My furriest best friend. I’ve mentioned my parents a lot, I’m their only daughter so I grew up by myself most of the time. I really liked coloring and reading and television. We had to attend school from when we were around five until we graduated at like eighteen. Then you could go to work or continue studying, which is what I did. I went to a college in my hometown and I studied and I met a boy. His name was, or is, Mathew and we were together throughout college. At our graduation party he proposed and I said yes”. This feels ridiculous. Summarizing your brief existence with insignificant events to Azriel. A male who had conquered the darkness that imprisoned him, who had fought in wars, who had rescued people, who had lived and seen so many things you couldn’t even dream of. “My mom was ecstatic about the proposal, she loved Mathew and she wanted me to get married and have kids and start a family. But I was not that happy. I loved Mat, I really did but the thought of getting married to him made me nauseous. The thing is that he could be… cruel when he wanted to be. At first it was only when he was upset but the longer we were together he would say the meanest things to me as if they were facts I had to accept. But he was very romantic at times and everyone in my life loved him. I just didn’t have it in me to stay with him though. So I broke it off against my mother’s wishes. It broke his heart and my mothers more than it broke mine. After that I had started fighting with both of my parents. Suddenly I felt like they were trying to control my every choice and I felt like I was being suffocated. After a really bad fight I booked a flight to Europe and didn’t look back. I needed to get away from them, from Mathew, from the whole town. I needed new faces and so I had been traveling for about six months before… everything. I didn’t speak to them for months. They would ask about me to my friends and after a while I missed them so I would call every once in a while.” By now you’re a pile of tears and tissues “We had started to make amends, you know? They were learning to respect my boundaries and I was excited for the new chapter and then it all went to hell”. You huff “and the worst part is that it’s all my fault, all of this mess is only my fault. When I left the house they had insisted that I don’t go or that I bring someone with me but I wouldn’t listen. I knew they were just saying anything they could to get me to stay. And everyday I’m here I keep picturing them thinking I’m dead. Maybe they’ve grieved for me already,  maybe they think I was kidnapped and had a horrible painful death. I have aunts and uncles and cousins and friends too, I wonder what they think happened. I feel so guilty that I’m here with all of you in this magical world and they must be suffering. And it’s ironic too, I had no plans to return home until I stepped through the damn portal, I would’ve kept traveling until I found a place that felt like home and I would’ve stayed far away”.

By now there were no more tears. “I keep thinking about all of it, my upbringing and I’ve landed on the conclusion that I was just an obedient little doll for everyone in my life. Being here has been so draining emotionally but it has been the only time where I can just exist without having to seek approval from my parents or my teachers or my partner” you laugh a bit “Mat would be furious if he found out I’ve been staying in a strangers house and that to travel I have to be carried through the air by a male. But he’s not here. My mom would be so upset too. I wonder… if , or when I get back would I even want to seek them out. I think I would only do it out of sheer obligation”. Your voice was hoarse by now “I miss them though, all of them. I miss their voices and their hugs and the security of feeling at home. I think what scares me the most is forgetting about them, their smells, their laughs. The pictures kept their faces fresh in my mind but now I don’t know how long I’ll be here and…” you swallow “memories fade” you close your mouth, tired of the sound of your voice. Azriel stayed quiet too. He had no idea how to make you feel better. But he figured you would appreciate a cup of soothing tea so he asked the house. “Here” he hands you a cup, just how you like it. He walks to your bed and grabs a throw blanket and drapes it across your shoulders. Then, he sits next to you and pulls you to his side. You relish the warmth radiating from him, the autumn frost having taken over Velaris the last few days, and lean your head on his shoulder. “I don’t know about the pictures but you can tell me all the stories you don’t want to forget and I’ll remember them for you”. 

[kristeristerin]

Ok, listen. I have adored doing all of these Taylor Swift song drabbles, but I have a very important question.

Why does no one love Cassian?!?!

I haven’t had any requests for the Lord of Bloodshed! I’m low key heartbroken about this. Lol. 😂

That being said, I’ve received 30 prompts so far and I’m trying to work on them as I can. Prompting is still open though! ❤️❤️