#Ray Van Horn

[gbhbl]

Book Review: Behind the Shadows by Ray Van Horn, Jr

Behind The Shadows is the title of Ray Van Horn, Jr.’s latest book, a horror compilation released at the back end of 2024. Behind the Shadows delivers 10 stories and reads like a bit of a love letter to the 80’s and 90’s where the author’s love of music, movies, 80’s horror and comics shines through in every story. An anthology that delivers 10 clever stories with plenty of attitude, plenty of…

[holley4734]

Interview with . . . Ray Van Horn Jr.

@rvanhornjr @ITHERETWEETER1 #writingcommunity @LovingBlogs @SincerelyEssie @BloggersHut #bloggershutRT @_TeamBlogger @MusicBlogRT #revolutioncalling #interview #authorinterview

[thepunkmuppet]

costumes / looks I desperately need gerard way to wear on stage (add your own in reblogs!!)

greek statue, he’s fully painted white including his hair with a white toga with a golden wreath thing on his head. I just think that would look sick

police uniform covered in blood

straight up zombie with full on green decaying gory make up

one of the heathers from heathers

either the blue cheerleader outfit from the i’m not okay mv or the iconic red ones from teenagers. then we’d have a little trio!

ghostface. possibly cunty ghostface as a treat

vanya from umbrella academy - young version with the school girl fit and black mask OR the all white comic version of course

also number five from umbrella academy (classic school boy fit)

this sounds weird but I think this would be really cool and meta for wwwy - a stereotypical mcr fan / emo. as in with that one black parade t shirt, heavy eyeliner, black nails, side swept emo fringe, studded bracelets and belts, skinny black jeans, vans or converse. again a very meta concept, after their old person looks in 2022 I can really see them doing this as a whole band this year and I would loooove to finally see gerard in the fashion style that’s so associated with him and his music

howl from howl’s moving castle

possibly also sophie from howl’s moving castle

slenderman

literally just satan. like the most stereotypical devil, give them fully painted red skin, horns, fangs, yellow or black eyes, maybe even goat legs. probably with a majestic black suit or something, or for a succubus vibe a black flowy dress with a slit down the leg. now that I think about it, this would be a SICK wwwy look to shock us all, esp if ray mikey and frank all dressed as other demons or the souls of the damned or some shit.

peni parker - he made her!!

question mark jumper from doctor who

also missy from doctor who omg

jane doe from ride the cyclone, possibly with added marionette or cracked porcelain makeup like in some renditions

classic majestic white-robed angel, with enormous fake wings and maybe even sparkly gold makeup and a big gold halo. also would be cool in all black, or all white but covered in blood (red, gold, or black, all would look cool)

buffy summers in prophecy girl, except he also has blood all over his neck from where the master bit her. I hope he’s watched btvs I think he would very much enjoy it this look would fit with their vampire vibe sooooo well

classic frankenstein’s monster

mothman. not only is he a heartthrob but he’s also a hunched goblin cryptid to me. the duality of man (he/theys)

jane prentiss from the magnus archives. if you don’t know she is a living flesh hive of sentient worms, she’s decaying and full of holes. again with all the nasty decaying rotting prosthetic makeup plus THE RED DRESS!!!

mr darcy vibes, sopping wet regency man with a big puffy white t shirt

opposite side of that, fuck it give him a full on ballroom gown

henry creel from stranger things (pre-vecna, nurse outfit)

any disney princess

crowley from good omens. my man looks GOOD in those anthony janthony aah sunglasses he has

cute flowy summer dress with like a flowery pattern. either go cottagecore with it and have flowers in his hair, or go full white soccer mum and put him in huge cunty sunglasses a massive straw sun hat with a ribbon on it

all-black cowboy!!!! the fact I’ve never seen him in a cowboy hat is actual sacrilege. also would very much appreciate an all-pink sequin studded cowboy

any alice in wonderland character, especially alice herself, the classic disney movie look with the blue dress and the bow in the hair. he would also do a great chesire cat (spooky big grin makeup paired with his weird ass dramatic facial expressions?? inspired) or a super extravagant queen / king / knave of hearts. also 100000% the mad hatter omfg, he was BORN to do a jefferson from once upon a time look!!

[battyaboutbooksreviews]

💖 Sapphic Books Coming Out May 2024

🩷 There's something especially sweet about a sapphic romance. Here are only a few of the amazing sapphic books hitting shelves in May 2024. Which ones are you adding to your ever-growing TBR?

Contemporary 💖 Here For the Wrong Reasons - Annabel Paulsen & Lydia Wang 💖 Perfume & Pain - Anna Dorn 💖 Cheryl - Jillian Fleck 💖 A Little Kissing Between Friends - Chencia C. Higgins 💖 Lavash At First Sight - Taleen Voskuni 💖 The Game of Giants - Marion Douglas 💖 We Were the Universe - Kimberly King Parsons 💖 Oye - Melissa Mogollon 💖 The Summer Love Strategy - Ray Stoeve 💖 Noah Frye Gets Crushed - Maggie Horne 💖 Halfway to Harbor - Nicole Melleby 💖 Sunhead - Alex Assan

💖 The 7-10 Split - Karmen Lee 💖 Trust & Safety - Laura Blackett & Eve Gleichman 💖 Second Night Stand - Karelia Stetz-Waters & Fay Stetz-Waters 💖 How It Works Out - Myriam Lacroix 💖 April May June July - Alison B. Hart 💖 The Ride of Her Life - Jennifer Dugan 💖 One Night With the CEO - Emily Hayes 💖 Dulhaniyaa - Talia Bhatt 💖 A Girl Can Dream - Emily Barr 💖 I Want You More - Swan Huntley 💖 Exhibit - R. O. Kwon 💖 Only a Bridesmaid - Haley Donnell

💖 Thirsty - Jas Hammonds 💖 Housemates - Emma Copley Eisenberg 💖 Don’t Be a Drag - Skye Quinlan 💖 True Love and Other Impossible Odds - Christina Li 💖 Murray Out of Water - Taylor Tracy 💖 The Redemption of Daya Keane - Gia Gordon 💖 Blame My Virgo Moon - Freja Nicole Woolf 💖 From Where We Are - Nicole Zelniker 💖 Cabin Fever - Tagan Shepard 💖 Channel Surfing in the Sea of Happiness - Guy Babineau 💖 Meet Me in Berlin - Samantha L. Valentine 💖 Behind You - Catherine Hernandez

Paranormal/Horror 💖 Primal Hunt - L.L. Raand 💖 Blood on the Tide - Katee Robert 💖 We Mostly Come Out at Night - (ed) Rob Costello 💖 Flowers from the Void - Gianni Washington 💖 My Darling Dreadful Thing - Johanna van Veen 💖 When the Devil - Emma E. Murray 💖 Honeybites - I. S. Belle 💖 My Favorite Thing Is Monsters - Emil Ferris 💖 The Worst Perfect Moment -Shivaun Plozza

Fantasy 💖 The Honey Witch - Sydney J. Shields 💖 The Fireborne Blade - Charlotte Bond 💖 Chained Destinies - D. Jordan Redhawk 💖 Can’t Spell Treason Without Tea - Rebecca Thorne 💖 Grand Slam Romance: Major League Hotties - Ollie Hicks & Emma Oosterhous 💖 Snake Charming - Genevieve McCluer 💖 The Witches of Silverlake - Simon Curtis 💖 Death’s Country - R. M. Romero 💖 Snowblooded - Emma Sterner-Radleygh 💖 Bird Suit - Sydney Hegele 💖 Farzana's Spite - Felix Graves

Historical 💖 The Good Women of Fudi - Liu Hong 💖 Spitting Gold - Carmella Lowkis 💖 Adrift - Sam Ledel 💖 A Heart Divided - Angie Williams 💖 A Liaison with Her Leading Lady - Lotte R. James

Mystery/Thriller 💖 The Deadly Spark - Roxie Key 💖 The Advice Columnist - Cade Haddock Strong 💖 The Lilies - Quinn Diacon-Furtado 💖 Loyalty - E. J. Noyes 💖 Clean Kill - Anne Laughlin 💖 Have You Seen This Girl - Nita Tyndall 💖 The Last to Pie - Misha Popp

Sci-Fi 💖 The Sunforge - Sascha Stronach 💖 Road to Ruin - Hana Lee 💖 Exile in Guyville - Amy Lee Lillard 💖 The Lily of Enarah - Arden Brax 💖 The Z Word - Lindsay King-Miller

[dannyreviews]

Golden Age of Hollywood Actors Born Before (And Including) 1937 Still Alive

This only includes actors that had at least one credited role in a Hollywood feature film or short up to 1959.

Elisabeth Waldo (b. 1918)

Caren Marsh Doll (b. 1919)

Patricia Wright (b. 1921)

Jacqueline White (b. 1922)

Annette Warren (b. 1922)

Ray Anthony (b. 1922)

Tommy Dix (b. 1923)

Eva Marie Saint (b. 1924)

Anne Vernon (b. 1924)

Maria Riva (b. 1924)

June Lockhart (b. 1925)

Lee Grant (b. 1925)

Peggy Webber (b. 1925)

Lise Bourdin (b. 1925)

Brigitte Auber (b. 1925)

Kerima (b. 1925)

Bob Graham (b. 1925)

Terry Kilburn (b. 1926) 

Marilyn Erskine (b. 1926)

Bambi Linn (b. 1926)

David Frankham (b. 1926)

Tommy Morton (b. 1926)

Jill Jarmyn (b. 1926)

Marilyn Knowlden (b. 1926)

Genevieve Page (b. 1927)

Donna Martell (b. 1927)

William Smithers (b. 1927)

Peter Walker (b. 1927)

H.M. Wynant (b. 1927)

Betty Harford (b. 1927)

Cora Sue Collins (b. 1927)

Marilyn Granas (b. 1927)

Ann Blyth (b. 1928)

Nancy Olson (b. 1928)

Peggy Dow (b. 1928)

Kathleen Hughes (b. 1928)

Colleen Townsend (b. 1928)

Marion Ross (b. 1928)

Gaby Rodgers (b. 1928)

Jan Shepard (b. 1928)

Walter Maslow (b. 1928)

Tom Troupe (b. 1928)

Sidney Kibrick (b. 1928)

Garry Watson (b. 1928)

Fay Chaldecott (b. 1928)

Mark Rydell (b. 1929)

Terry Moore (b. 1929)

Vera Miles (b. 1929)

Ann Robinson (b. 1929)

Liseotte Pulver (b. 1929)

James Hong (b. 1929)

Rachel Ames (b. 1929)

Olga James (b. 1929)

Michael Forest (b. 1929)

Vikki Dougan (b. 1929)

Steve Terrell (b. 1929)

Margaret Kerry (b. 1929)

James Congdon (b. 1929)

Betsy Gay (b. 1929)

Jack Betts (b. 1929)

Clint Eastwood (b. 1930)

Joanne Woodward (b. 1930)

Mara Corday (b. 1930)

Nita Talbot (b. 1930)

Taina Elg (b. 1930)

Robert Wagner (b. 1930)

John Astin (b. 1930)

Tommy Cook (b. 1930)

Mary Costa (b. 1930)

Lois Smith (b. 1930)

Will Hutchins (b. 1930)

Peggy King (b. 1930)

Lynn Hamilton (b. 1930)

Don Burnett (b. 1930)

Clark Burroughs (b. 1930)

Robert Hinkle (b. 1930)

Sheila Connolly (b. 1930)

Barbara Bestar (b. 1930)

Rita Moreno (b. 1931)

Leslie Caron (b. 1931)

Carroll Baker (b. 1931)

William Shatner (b. 1931)

Mamie Van Doren (b. 1931)

Robert Colbert (b. 1931)

Barbara Eden (b. 1931)

Angie Dickinson (b. 1931)

Claire Bloom (b. 1931)

Marianne Koch (b. 1931)

Sylvia Lewis (b. 1931)

Carmen De Lavallade (b. 1931)

Zohra Lampert (b. 1931)

Michael Dante (b. 1931)

Ann McCrea (b. 1931)

Jack Grinnage (b. 1931)

Maralou Gray (b. 1931)

Billy Mindy (b. 1931)

Sugar Dawn (b. 1931)

Joanne Arnold (b. 1931)

Joel Grey (b. 1932)

George Chakiris (b. 1932)

Felicia Farr (b. 1932)

Abbe Lane (b. 1932)

Steve Rowland (b. 1932)

Jacqueline Beer (b. 1932)

Colleen Miller (b. 1932)

Joanne Gilbert (b. 1932)

Olive Moorefield (b. 1932)

Neile Adams (b. 1932)

Jacqueline Duval (b. 1932)

Edna May Wonnacott (b. 1932)

Richard Tyler (b. 1932)

Mickey Roth (b. 1932)

Leon Tyler (b. 1932)

Peggy McIntyre (b. 1932)

Christiane Martel (b. 1932)

Elsa Cardenas (b. 1932)

Claude Bessy (b. 1932)

Kim Novak (b. 1933)

Julie Newmar (b. 1933)

Debra Paget (b. 1933)

Constance Towers (b. 1933)

Joan Collins (b. 1933)

Kathleen Nolan (b. 1933)

Brett Halsey (b. 1933)

Robert Fuller (b. 1933)

Pat Crowley (b. 1933)

Barrie Chase (b. 1933)

Jackie Joseph (b. 1933)

Geoffrey Horne (b. 1933)

Tsai Chin (b. 1933)

Lita Milan (b. 1933)

Vera Day (b. 1933)

Diana Darrin (b. 1933)

Ziva Rodann (b. 1933)

Jeanette Sterke (b. 1933)

Marti Stevens (b. 1933)

Annette Dionne (b. 1933)

Cecile Dionne (b. 1933)

Patti Hale (b. 1933)

Gary Clarke (b. 1933)

Olive Sturgess (b. 1933)

Shirley MacLaine (b. 1934) 

Sophia Loren (b. 1934)

Shirley Jones (b. 1934)

Russ Tamblyn (b. 1934)

Pat Boone (b. 1934)

Audrey Dalton (b. 1934)

Claude Jarman Jr. (b. 1934)

Tina Louise (b. 1934)

Karen Sharpe (b. 1934)

Joyce Van Patten (b. 1934)

May Britt (b. 1934)

Joby Baker (b. 1934)

Jamie Farr (b. 1934)

Myrna Hansen (b. 1934)

Priscilla Morgan (b. 1934)

Aki Aleong (b. 1934)

Robert Fields (b. 1934)

Dani Crayne (b. 1934)

Donnie Dunagan (b. 1934)

Richard Hall (b. 1934)

Charles Bates (b. 1934)

Marilyn Horne (b. 1934)

Marilee Earle (b. 1934)

Rod Dana (b. 1935) 

Pippa Scott (b. 1935)

Ruta Lee (b. 1935)

Barbara Bostock (b. 1935)

Johnny Mathis (b. 1935)

Leslie Parrish (b. 1935)

Salome Jens (b. 1935)

Yvonne Lime (b. 1935)

Jean Moorehead (b. 1935)

Marco Lopez (b. 1935)

Joyce Meadows (b. 1935)

Richard Harrison (b. 1935)

Christopher Severn (b. 1935)

Richard Nichols (b. 1935)

Carol Coombs (b. 1935)

Nino Tempo (b. 1935)

Patricia Prest (b. 1935)

Dawn Bender (b. 1935)

John Considine (b. 1935)

Jerry Farber (b. 1935)

Clyde Willson (b. 1935)

Bob Burns (b. 1935)

Joel Newfield (b. 1935)

Marlene Cameron (b. 1935)

Susan Kohner (b. 1936)

Millie Perkins (b. 1936)

Burt Brickenhoff (b. 1936)

Mason Alan Dinehart (b. 1936)

Anna Maria Alberghetti (b. 1936)

Lisa Davis (b. 1936)

Joan O'Brien (b. 1936)

Richard Harrison (b. 1936)

Tommy Ivo (b. 1936)

John Wilder (b. 1936)

Gary Conway (b. 1936)

Michael Chapin (b. 1936)

Carol Morris (b. 1936)

Fernando Alvarado (b. 1936)

Jack Nicholson (b. 1937)

Tommy Sands (b. 1937)

William Wellman Jr. (b. 1937)

Paul Hampton (b. 1937)

George Takei (b. 1937)

Margaret O’Brien (b. 1937)

Connie Francis (b. 1937)

Carol Nugent (b. 1937)

Patti Brady (b. 1937)

June Hedin (b. 1937)

Paul Collins (b. 1937)

Maureen Hingert (b. 1937)

[dominustempori]

TWO MORE MONTHS, PEOPLE!!!

Quick thoughts to follow up after my post on the teaser trailer (SPOILER WARNING!) In honor of March the 22nd…I’ll go for 22 observations/opinions.

1. Slimer’s back!

2. JANINE IN UNIFORM! WITH A BLASTER!

-Definitely a call back to 1) one of the ORIGINAL storyboard designs for the backpack/neutrona wand in the first movie, and 2) the IDW comics when Janine and other “new ‘Busters” take over when the OGs disappear.

3. Definitely another secret society/cult that must’ve worshipped Garraka ( hidden room with the demon’s horns/frozen eyepatch guy that shatters in the supposed flashback scene..?)

4. If that’s Coney Island where the big ice storm is coming ashore…then THAT could very well be a throwback to the RGB episode “Collect Call of Cthulu.”

5. GB’s got a new van! Ecto 1c?

6. Research lab? AWESOME!

7. Big question- what’s the connection between the arrival of Garraka and the red light on the containment unit? Is it coming after GBHQ to get more power (much like Gozer?)

8. OK…James Acaster is NOT a grown Oscar…damn. I’m sure his researcher character is gonna be brilliant though. Poor guy…frostburned hand? Eesh.

9. I REALLY hope they explore more of Callie (and therefore, Egon’s) background story. That scene where Trevor’s in that attic��aw.

10. DRONE TRAP!!! Next level! Fans lost their minds with the RTV…someone will surely try to build a model of a freaking FLYING ghost trap.

11. Modified proton packs? Makes sense now, that thing can FREEZE the positron stream! WHAT!?

12. Grooberson’s driving Ecto 1! F*ck yeah, Paul Rudd!

13. LIBRARY GHOST IS BACK!

14. So how does Kumail Nanjiani’s character come into possession of that mysterious golden orb? I’m still thinking it’s his apartment with the secret door.

15. Imagine being an old time NYC firefighter and seeing men frozen to death, in fear. When did NYFD form, I wonder?

16. Patton Oswalt is the new Ray…love it.

17. Bill Murray…still got it, man.

18. Swear to god that’s his old orange jacket from the first movie.

19. OK…on one hand, Gil and Jason are probably not counting the GB Video Game as part of the canon, and yet, the IDW comic universe IS built on some plot points of the game. So…does the PCOC exist in Frozen Empire? Is Peck mayor? Perish the thought?

20. Bring on the mischievous Mini-Pufts! Evidently some survived the “Summerville Massacre.”

21. PLEASE have Egon’s unknown life history be in the story somewhere, PLEASE Gil and Jason! It’s almost 10 years since the world lost Harold Ramis…PLEASE pay his beloved character some more tribute.

22. I have to admit…I do like Annie Potts back with not just her red hair, but those new blue-frame glasses. Good nod to the animated series, I will bow to that piece of fan service, not sorry.

TWO MORE MONTHS!!!

[americanghoststories]

It was October 1903 when the creature arrived in Van Meter, Iowa. It was first encountered by U. G. Griffiths, the town’s implements dealer. He smelled it before he saw it, a powerful stench, like a barnyard in Hell. Then it appeared, a tall sort-of-kind-of-not-really human shaped creature, standing easily at 7 feet, with smooth bat-like wings, racing along the rooftops at breakneck speed. In the center of the creature’s face was a horn, and from this horn shone a brilliant, blinding light that illuminated its way.

Griffiths knew exactly what to do. He shouldered his shotgun, (hello, it was hunting season, of course he had his gun,) and opened fire. He could see that several of his shots found their mark, and yet, the creature did not fall. Indeed, it brushed them off as if they’d never been fired and sped along its way.

The very next night, Peter Dunn, the town’s doctor and bank cashier, (what, you’ve never had a side gig?) encountered the creature. Dunn also opened fire, but the creature, unfazed, simply flew away. It did, though, leave behind three-toed tracks in the soft earth, that Dunn had the presence of mind to make a paster cast of.

The next night, the creature woke up O. V. White, who shot at it while it perched atop a telephone pole. This woke up Sidney Gregg just in time to see the creature hop away “…like a kangaroo.”

Over and over again, people throughout the town had their own encounter with the creature. One of the local high school teachers proclaimed it to be an “antediluvian monster.’ And over and over again, many of them would try – and fail – to kill the creature.

Finally, these good Iowans had had enough. When they got word of strange sounds emanating from the abandoned coal mine on the north side of town, they formed a posse and marched off to confront this evil once and for all. As they gathered and the gaping mouth of the mine, they found what they’d been looking for was already waiting.

"Presently the noise opened up again, as though Satan and a regiment of imps were coming forth for battle," said the article in the Des Moines Register. Then with a giant whoosh, out of the mine launched the creature, followed closely by a smaller, perhaps juvenile, specimen.

The night was pierced by the light of the creatures’ horns, the air turned sour with their putrid stench, and the men’s hearts leaped to their throats. They could only watch in horror as the creatures (dare we imagine, mother and child?) flew out into the night. But they would wait, this Van Meter Army, and vanquish the monsters when they returned.

Return they did, as the sun’s rays first breached the horizon. This time, the men’s nerves didn’t break. This time, they stood firm. This time, they opened fire, unleashing a barrage “that would sink the Spanish fleet.” And yet, all of their bullets, all of their shot, had no effect whatsoever on the creatures. Creatures that would only look upon the men with a curious mix of pity and disdain, then slowly make their way back into the mine.

But while they failed to kill the creatures, the men of Van Meter were successful, in a way. For from that night, the creatures, now dubbed the Van Meter Visitor, have never been seen again.

At least, not yet.

[brookstonalmanac]

Birthdays 2.27

Beer Birthdays

Albert Braun (1863)

Five Favorite Birthdays

Howard Hesseman; actor (1940)

Donal Logue; actor (1966)

Ralph Nader; lawyer, activist (1934)

John Steinbeck; writer (1902)

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow; poet, writer (1807)

Famous Birthdays

Marian Anderson singer (1897)

Adam Baldwin; actor (1962)

Joan Bennett; actor (1910)

Ray Berry; Baltimore Colts WR (1933)

Hugo Black; U.S. Supreme Court justice (1886)

Constantine; emperor of Rome (280 C.E.)

William Demarest; actor (1892)

Peter de Vries; writer (1910)

Lawrence Durrell; writer (1912)

James T. Farrell; writer (1904)

Irving Fisher; economist (1867)

Tony Gonzalez; Kansas City Chiefs TE (1976)

Dexter Gordon; jazz saxophonist (1923)

Alice Hamilton; toxicologist, doctor (1869)

Ted Horn; auto racer (1910)

Clarence "Kelly" Johnson; airplane engineer (1910)

Wendy Liebman; comedian (1961)

Ralph Linton; cultural anthropologist (1893)

Guy Mitchell; singer (1927)

Gene Sarazen; golfer (1902)

David Sarnoff; inventor (1891)

Neil Schon; rock guitarist (1954)

Grant Shaud; actor (1961)

Irwin Shaw; writer (1913)

Grant Show; actor (1962)

Nancy Spungen; Sid Vicious' murdered girlfriend (1958)

Peter Stone; writer (1930)

Elizabeth Taylor; actor (1932)

Johnny Van Zant; rock singer (1959)

Van Williams; actor (1934)

Joanne Woodward; actor (1930)

[jules-has-notes]

Road Trip — VoicePlay music video

The life of touring musicians can be stressful. Like anyone else in the midst of a long drive in a cramped vehicle, they can get on each other's nerves and argue over what music to play. With this dramatic comedic reenactment, VoicePlay gives their audience a peek inside the tour van. After years of performing this medley / theatrical sketch, they finally got a chance to record a professional video in a live setting during the 2014 Sing-Off tour.

Details:

title: Road Trip

original songs / performers: [1:30] "Tiptoe Through the Tulips" by Tiny Tim; [1:50] "Orinoco Flow" by Enya; [2:05] "Cum On Feel the Noize" by Quiet Riot; [3:12] "Big Shot" by Billy Joel; [3:24] "I Wanna Rock" by Twisted Sister; [3:33] "Voices Carry" by ’Til Tuesday; [3:50] "Shout" by Tears For Fears; [4:06] "Why Can't We Be Friends?" by War; [4:15] "That Smell" by Lynyrd Skynyrd; [5:10] "Hard to Say I'm Sorry" by Chicago; [6:34] "We Just Disagree" by Dave Mason; [6:54] "Royals" by Lorde

written by: "Tiptoe Through the Tulips" by Al Dubin & Joe Burke; "Orinoco Flow" by Eithne "Enya" Pádraigín Ní Bhraonáin & Roma Ryan; "Cum On Feel the Noize" by Noddy Holder & Jim Lea; "Big Shot" by Billy Joel; "I Wanna Rock" by Dee Snider; "Voices Carry" by Robert Holmes, Aimee Mann, Michael Hausman, & Joey Pesce; "Shout" by Roland Orzabal & Ian Stanley; "Why Can't We Be Friends?" by Papa Dee Allen, Harold Ray Brown, B.B. Dickerson, Lonnie Jordan, Charles Miller, Lee Oskar, Howard E. Scott, & Jerry Goldstein; "That Smell" by Allen Collins & Ronnie Van Zant; "Hard to Say I'm Sorry" by Peter Cetera & David Foster; "Royals" by Ella "Lorde" Yelich-O'Connor & Joel Little

arranged by: Geoff Castellucci

release date: 22 May 2014

My favorite bits:

Layne's deliberately-obnoxious-sibling energy when he re-locks the door the second time.

five grown men making vroom-vroom noises and other sound effects as part of their job

Tony singing ♫ "Why? Why? Why?" ♫ in annoyance instead of ♫ "wild, wild, wild" ♫, and his smug smile at cutting off Eli's accompaniment

Eli excitedly throwing the horns only to be met with Tony's completely unenthusiastic "rawk". 😒

Geoff's growl note as Eli's "shout"ing wakes him up

Eli watch the rooOAAAD!!!

professional singers using their talents to set up and deliver an elaborate fart joke (I am completely serious. It's magnificent.)

Earl's adorable muppet snoring 💤 , and his bashful expression as he apologizes

Tony wiping the pretend aerosol spray off his face (whatever it may be… air freshener? hairspray? breath freshener? floor wax? dessert topping?)

the pitch pipe / seat belt alarm gag — such a clever way to reset after the evacuation interlude

and, of course, Layne's incredible solo

Trivia:

Layne sometimes changes the song he busts out at the end in an attempt to make the other guys laugh and break character. I've found audience recordings where he goes with "Baby" by Justin Bieber, "Hello" by Adele, and "Let It Go" from Frozen.

VoicePlay have been performing and refining this medley / skit since their 4:2:Five days. The earliest full version I've found is from 2010, with Ryan and Danny in the front seats, but an even earlier clip appeared in their 2009 promo video.

They did make an in-studio version with a real car in 2013. It's currently only available through their Patreon.

[ogtombrown]

                                                                Blacula

           When watching Blacula I expected a comedy based on the title and the trailer, and while the film does start out a little campy, it quickly turns serious. Although it's humorous when someone yells "Blacula" for the first time in the movie, the rest of the movie is portrayed as straight horror and grows rather gloomy. Director William Crain is listed by Wikipedia as "one of the first black directors to achieve commercial success" after graduating from a prestigious film school. The screenplay by Joan Torres and Raymond Koenig, who appear to have only ever written it for this film and its sequel, Scream Blacula Scream, is essentially a Dracula retelling that takes place in Los Angeles in the early 1970s. The film has a funk soul vibe that is propelled by Gene Page's peppy rhythm and blues score and resembles a Gothic romance.

             Because the movie portrays itself as something lot lighter and sillier and fills itself out with song and dance routines, it makes for a generally perplexing viewing experience. But, William Marshall does a fantastic job as the hero, and the result is a solid Supernatural Horror/Vampire film with Blaxploitation origins. The dark vampire movie Blacula was made in the 1970s, and one of the most obvious differences between then and now is that it was actually played straight. This isn't Rudy Ray Moore in a cape. When I discovered that this was a horror film, I was really shocked.

          So, this guy escapes and begins sucking blood all over El Lay in genuine horror murder scenes. The plot is the same as in Dracula, but the soundtrack features far more wah-wah guitar, bass, and horns. A slick, alluring vampire who can transform into a bat and wears a cape goes about his business and develops an obsession with a woman (Vonetta McGee, who also plays his wife from three hundred years previous). There is no Van Helsing in this case, but there is a curious police detective (Thalmus Rasulala) who begins to think outside the box as he investigates this bizarre trail of bloody bodies.

            I appreciate how seriously this film takes things. This is enjoyable. William Marshall gives his all in the major role, even if inexperienced director William Crain struggles to keep the camera in focus. At the time, Marshall was a theatrical veteran who performed in everything from Carmen Jones to Shakespeare. He was close to 50 years old. His commanding screen presence and thunderous voice make the ground slightly tremble whenever he speaks. No matter how ridiculous some of his lines may be, Marshall has a job to do and is determined to do it well.

[elainapendragon]

Pronunciation Guide:

Drakabloð Sögur: DRAK-ah-BLODTH SOH-gur

Valhöll: VAL-holl

Alfheimr: ALV-hey-MUR

Ljósalfar: LYOS-al-VAR

Dökkalfar: DOCK-al-VAR

Svartalfheimr: SVART-alv-hey-MUR

Svartalfar: SVART-al-VAR

Íssalfar: EES-al-VAR

Jötúnheimr: YOET-oon-hey-MUR

Hýrralfar: HYEER-al-VAR

Múspellheimr: MOOS-pell-hey-MUR

Skögralfar: SKO-gur-al-VAR

Grœnnfell: GROEN-vell

Vanír: VAN-eer

Vanaheimr: VAN-a-hey-MUR

Þokalfar: THOK-al-VAR

Nídavellír: NEE-da-VELL-eer

Nærnin: NAYR-nin

Seiðberendr: SAYDTH-ba-REN-dur

Seiðragaldr: SAYDTH-ra-GAL-dur

Fafnir: FOV-neer

Vaeryn Téhlladen: VAY-rin TAY-la-DEN

Zephysus: ZEH-fi-SUS

Höddgardr: HOD-gar-DUR

Kuningaz Xekaara: KOO-ning-GAHZ za-KAR-ah

Raameshaz: rah-MEH-shaz

Hemaara: HEY-mar-AH

Zou’maal: zoo-MAHL

Ne’daag: NAY-dahg

Tal’mar: tal-MAR

Friðrs: fridth-THURS

Iilr: EEL-urs

Bilfjord Beast: bil-FYORD beest

Skjelkii: SKYEL-key

Fjorlagforað: fyor-LAG-vor-ADTHS

Nornadäg: NORN-uh-DAHG

Súnadäg: SOON-uh-DAHG

Múnadäg: MOON-uh-DAHG

Týrsadäg: TEERS-uh-DAHG

Wodensdäg: WO-dens-DAHG

Thorsadäg: THORS-uh-DAHG

Friggsadäg: FREEGS-uh-DAHG

Niflheimr: NIFL-hey-MUR

Hvergelmír: HVER-gel-MEER

Elivagar: EL-iv-AH-gar

Svöll: SVOL

Gúnnthra: GOON-thra

Fjörm: FYORM

Fimbulthúl: fim-BUL-thool

Slíd: SLEED

Hríd: HREED

Sylg: SILG

Ylg: ILG

Vid: VEED

Leipt: LAYPT

Gjöll: GYOLL

Ginnúngagap: GI-noon-GA-gahp

Ymir: EE-meer

Aurgelmír: ARE-gel-MEER

Audhumla: ODD-hum-LAH

Buri: BUR-ee

Börr: BOR

Bergelmir: BER-gel-MEER

Ask: OSK

Embla: em-BLAH

Sol: SOL

Mani: MAHN-ee

Bil: BEEL

Hjuki: HYOO-kee

Hati: HAH-tee

Sköll: SKOLL

Yggdrasíl: IGG-dra-SEEL

Hraesvelg: HRAYS-velg

Nídhöggr: NEED-hog-UR

Ratatösk: RAT-at-OSK

Modsognir: MOD-sog-NIR

Durin: DUR-in

Æsír: AY-seer

Frey: FRAY

Valfreyja: VAL-frey-YAH

Heimdallr: HEYM-dall-UR

Bïfröst: BIE-frost

Baldr: BAL-dur

Nänna: NAHN-nah

Ragnarök: RAG-nah-ROHK

Fimbulvetr: FIM-bul-VEYTR

Fenrisúlfr: FEN-ris-OOL-fur

Jörmúngandr: YORE-moon-GAHN-dar

Naglfar: NAHGL-var

Vígrid: VEE-grid

Gjállarhorn: GYAE-lar-HORN

Einherjar/Einherjerii: AIN-her-YAR/AIN-her-YAER-ee

Valhalla: VAL-hall-AH

Surtr: SUR-tur

Líf: LEEF

Lífthrasir: LEEF-thray-SEER

Gimlé: gim-LAY

Brimir: BREE-meer

Okolnír: oh-KOL-neer

Sindri: SIN-dree

Nidafjöll: NEED-ah-FYOL

Nastrond: nas-TROND

Drekivörðr: DREK-ee-VOR-dthur

Vandr: VAHN-dur

Rígurd: REE-gurd

Dögúl: DOH-gool

Bïfröstblaða: BIE-frost-BLADTH-ah

Sígarsholm: SEE-gars-HOLM

Galdyrbrynja: GAL-dur-BRIN-ya

Gleipnír: GLEYP-neer

Ellída: el-LEE-da

Vaettrhaerr: VAY-tur-HAYR

Izana: AYE-zan-AH

Fjörr: FYOR

Byardölf: BYARD-olv

Jarnir: YAR-neer

Alfhildr: ALV-hil-DUR

Rúnhildr: ROON-hil-DUR

Hildegardr: HIL-de-GAR-dur

Jarl: YARL

Skídbladnír: SKEED-blahd-NEER

Hneflagi: HNE-flah-GEE

Myennr: MYEH-nur

Keifdel Drekínalen: CAVE-dell drek-EE-nah-LEN

Vedthrelta: VED-thur-EL-tah

Lydia: lid-AYE-ah

Feldûrröst: fel-DOO-rost

Fjoðrbrandr: FYO-dthur-BRAN-dur

Asbjorn: AZ-bjorn

Zazyr: ZAZ-ur

Hráfnfär: HRAE-vin-VAR

Valdyrbjalla: VAL-dyur-BYAL-ah

Dàlr: DAH-lur

Múfnir: MOOV-neer

Ylette: YIL-ett

Reiyr: RAI-ur

Denris: DEN-ris

Laefden: LAYF-den

Alyr: AH-lyur

W’ei: wuh-AY

Aallviinaax: ALL-vee-NAX

Norðrljós: NOR-dthur-LYOS

Bleiðarak: BLIE-tha-RAK

Ornúsüm: OR-noo-ZOOM

Iirvaedín: ur-VAY-deen

Araelys: uh-RAY-lis

Ómakligr: OO-mok-LEE-gur

Eljúðnir: ael-YOODTH-neer

[julio-viernes]

No es fácil ser verde. El clásico de "Sesame Street" de Joe Raposo que interpretaba en la serie de TV la rana Kermit (Gustavo) con voz del creador del show Jim Henson, en versión de José Feliciano (LP "¡Sesame Mucho!", Children's Records Of America 1974).

"Bein´ Green" ha conocido muchas versiones (Frank Sinatra, Lena Horne, Buddy Rich, Diana Ross, Ray Charles...) pero la conocí en el LP de Van Morrison, "Hard Nose The Highway" (1973), otro disco con una portada que... Mejor no saber lo que significa. La versión de Van es anterior a la de Feli, pero siempre he pensado que Morrison había tomado nota interpretativa de él ya desde sus "semanas astrales". Perro Verde.

[quotesfrommyreading]

Today, much of the NCAA’s moral authority—indeed much of the justification for its existence—is vested in its claim to protect what it calls the “student-athlete.” The term is meant to conjure the nobility of amateurism, and the precedence of scholarship over athletic endeavor. But the origins of the “student-athlete” lie not in a disinterested ideal but in a sophistic formulation designed, as the sports economist Andrew Zimbalist has written, to help the NCAA in its “fight against workmen’s compensation insurance claims for injured football players.”

“We crafted the term student-athlete,” Walter Byers himself wrote, “and soon it was embedded in all NCAA rules and interpretations.” The term came into play in the 1950s, when the widow of Ray Dennison, who had died from a head injury received while playing football in Colorado for the Fort Lewis A&M Aggies, filed for workmen’s-compensation death benefits. Did his football scholarship make the fatal collision a “work-related” accident? Was he a school employee, like his peers who worked part-time as teaching assistants and bookstore cashiers? Or was he a fluke victim of extracurricular pursuits? Given the hundreds of incapacitating injuries to college athletes each year, the answers to these questions had enormous consequences. The Colorado Supreme Court ultimately agreed with the school’s contention that he was not eligible for benefits, since the college was “not in the football business.”

The term student-athlete was deliberately ambiguous. College players were not students at play (which might understate their athletic obligations), nor were they just athletes in college (which might imply they were professionals). That they were high-performance athletes meant they could be forgiven for not meeting the academic standards of their peers; that they were students meant they did not have to be compensated, ever, for anything more than the cost of their studies. Student-athlete became the NCAA’s signature term, repeated constantly in and out of courtrooms.

Using the “student-athlete” defense, colleges have compiled a string of victories in liability cases. On the afternoon of October 26, 1974, the Texas Christian University Horned Frogs were playing the Alabama Crimson Tide in Birmingham, Alabama. Kent Waldrep, a TCU running back, carried the ball on a “Red Right 28” sweep toward the Crimson Tide’s sideline, where he was met by a swarm of tacklers. When Waldrep regained consciousness, Bear Bryant, the storied Crimson Tide coach, was standing over his hospital bed. “It was like talking to God, if you’re a young football player,” Waldrep recalled.

Waldrep was paralyzed: he had lost all movement and feeling below his neck. After nine months of paying his medical bills, Texas Christian refused to pay any more, so the Waldrep family coped for years on dwindling charity.

Through the 1990s, from his wheelchair, Waldrep pressed a lawsuit for workers’ compensation. (He also, through heroic rehabilitation efforts, recovered feeling in his arms, and eventually learned to drive a specially rigged van. “I can brush my teeth,” he told me last year, “but I still need help to bathe and dress.”) His attorneys haggled with TCU and the state worker-compensation fund over what constituted employment. Clearly, TCU had provided football players with equipment for the job, as a typical employer would—but did the university pay wages, withhold income taxes on his financial aid, or control work conditions and performance? The appeals court finally rejected Waldrep’s claim in June of 2000, ruling that he was not an employee because he had not paid taxes on financial aid that he could have kept even if he quit football. (Waldrep told me school officials “said they recruited me as a student, not an athlete,” which he says was absurd.)

The long saga vindicated the power of the NCAA’s “student-athlete” formulation as a shield, and the organization continues to invoke it as both a legalistic defense and a noble ideal. Indeed, such is the term’s rhetorical power that it is increasingly used as a sort of reflexive mantra against charges of rabid hypocrisy.

  —  The Scandal of NCAA College Sports

[thehorrortree]

From Scream Queen to Lady Badass: An Evolution of Women in Horror by: Ray Van Horn, Jr. Is there anything more cringeworthy in the horror genre than the unfashionable damsel in distress trope?  It’s a hard sway from today’s horror scene, which has at least given actresses a 50/50 chance of being cast as sexpot butcher bait or given a more motivating assignment of kicking evil’s ass.  Or in the contemporary cases of Toni Collette in Hereditary or Lupita Nyong’o in Us, redefining what women can do to the genre, much less for it. As long as Betty Crocker and Hoover appliances were bleakly tagged upon the kitchen-bound stereotypes of women in pop culture, devaluation of females in horror was likewise an interminable norm.  Let’s face the facts; horror films of yesteryear were seldom rewarding to their leading ladies, especially being outnumbered for work 3 to 1 by the men. Bad enough those women lucky enough to be cast into a protagonist position in 1950s and later, Eighties horror, were often disposable eye candy.  Females of the drive-in days of the Fabulous Fifties were scripted to divvy just enough common-sense motherly dialogue to ferry the B-level masculine drivel overruling them.  This, as muscleheads in rubber suits, werewolves the palest shade of Lon Chaney, Jr. and stop-motion clay monsters sent women of the Fifties into extreme closeup mode, shrieking their guts out.  Frozen in place for seconds until they were either rescued by alpha intervention or they disappeared from the story altogether offscreen.  In either scenario, done so without a fight.  You just know the ancient warrior goddesses Sekhmet, Hel, Athena and Freya were face-palming themselves at the hapless (and hopeless) sight of these pin curled, Victory rolled “scream queens.” You can catch a plethora of black and white horror nuggets on your own or to the tune of Svengoolie’s loveable cornball drag.  For those who grew up watching Universal monster flicks and the 1950s atomic age romps via their local ghost host emcees on late Saturday nights, Sven (aka Rich Koz) is a horror hound’s security blanket.  Those monochromatic oldies but goodies he peddles from the Fifties through the early Sixties remain timid by today’s extreme standards.  Yet the bigger offense lurking from those often-gaudy terrors from the beyond lies more in the way women who weren’t Barbara Steele or Beverly Garland were portrayed. From that golden age of nuclear-fused lizards, ten story arachnoid, gelatinous daubs of doom, wetland creatures and bulbous-eyed aliens spewed the brainless stereotype of women-in-peril.  Even if a female lead of 1950s horror was given a quasi-glamorous occupation such as laboratory assistant, naval yeoman or, heaven forbid, a department manager, chances are, she would be there to offer her two cents, only to be shot down instead of offered a rifle (much less trained to use one) to help the boys in one of their suicide missions. As long as scream queens of the Fifties could screech louder than Little Richard and torch the screen with more conflagration than a McCarthy-ist burning of old EC Tales From the Crypt comics, this was all of which was required of women in horror.  This, along with a random appearance pushing an Electrolux vacuum in a full dress and high heels during commercial breaks for Ed Sullivan and Milton Berle. It’s no wonder a young Patty McCormack in the titular The Bad Seed from 1956 shook the world she lived in as an unforgettable, horrific little badass of her time.  Far more insidious than easily irritable Bill Mumy from the “It’s a Good Life” episode from The Twilight Zone.  McCormack’s glaring eyes of silent condemnation and her manipulative wares were a low-key but unnerving announcement of a new order slow to come.  McCormack represents one of the early-on female horror survivalists. If you want to really stretch the truth, we can go back as far as 1939’s The Wizard of Oz to pinpoint one of horror’s first female survivalists.

  Think about it.  I mean, sure, Oz is a G-rated family classic, so much it used to run faithfully every year on network t.v. on Thanksgiving night.  Yeah, the flying monkeys were scary enough to any twerp born before 1990.  The same with those jerkface trees pelting our yellow brick-skipping heroes with apples.  The freaking Wicked Witch of the West, though…man was she so sinister, we took feral delight in Dorothy’s dispatching her with a bucket of water.  All to help her newfound, combusted friend made of straw.  It was an act of courage not even the quivering lion had inside of him at that decisive moment heroes are born.  Pin the medal on Judy Garland instead. Boop-oop-a-doop?  Oh, hell no.  Betty may have had cartoon perverts to fend off, but she never had had to turn tables, much less escape a subterranean death circus from cannibalizing, brain-sledging chainsaw freaks like Caroline Williams did. When we think about how far women have come in the entertainment realm, it’s action and horror where ladies have staked far more equality than any other movie genre, much less any other industry.  Gal Gadot, Scarlet Johansson, Letitia Wright, Brie Larson, Eva Green and Margot Robbie have defined ultimate femme badassness in the comic book adaptation turf.  The organizers of the Women’s Rights Movement are no doubt smiling from the other side.  Yet I’m sure those in attendance on that fateful day on August 2, 1848 in Seneca Falls could never have foreseen the likes of Jamie Lee Curtis, Sigourney Weaver, Marilyn Burns, Danai Gurira, Adrienne King, Heather Langenkamp, Jessica Walter, Glenn Close, Essie Davis, Kyleigh Curran, Megumi Okina, Eihi Shiina, Shauna MacDonald, Caroline Williams, Camille Keaton, Sarah Butler, Neve Campbell, Millie Bobbie Brown, Milla Jovovich and many bold, badass ladies moving the horror genre forward in a pro-estrogen rebellion. The theme of badass women of horror has become such a hot topic in the mainstream media everyone has their own Top 10 or 20 lists, most of the aforementioned filling their ranks.  In this case, I’m talking about women of the genre who have either the natural skill set or the raw nerve to persevere through the ordeals of physical or psychological terror.  This could be Michonne, Sasha, Maggie or Carol from The Walking Dead, which has prided itself, in comic book and television form, of depicting its women with a stoic resolve to dispatch both zombies and pissant human aggressors who get in their way of seeing the next sunrise.  The Walking Dead as a show has become so mainstream its protagonists are as abundant and sadly throwaway as Game of Thrones, yet each show has more memorable, tough women to possibly give the late Rush Limbaugh reason to rue the day he first uttered “femi-Nazi.”  For that matter, the topsy-turvy world of Stranger Things proves a woman’s worth standing in defiance against an otherworldly cataclysm, even those non-bioengineered girls deprived of the gift of telekinesis.  While we’re at it, we can give the entire ensemble of The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (the show and the dark Archie comic book it was bred upon) a huge nod for its women exhibiting even more moxy than its male leads. We can wince in pain at the unnerving twittering of Asami Yamazaki’s (Eihi Shiina) methodic and excruciating piano wire torturing of Ryo Ishibashi in Audition, made worse knowing Yamazaki’s black widow act is simply how she gets by in life.  We can roar in triumph at Suzy Bannon’s (Jessica Harper) sleuthing and exterminating of Madame Blanc’s ballet school of the occult in 1977’s redder than red prototype version of Suspiria.  Take your pick who had the better outing in Cat People: Simone Simon in 1942 or Natasha Kinksi in the erotic remake forty years later.  Both well ahead of their times. Even though it doesn’t go well for her in the end, not a soul who’s ever watched the original Carrie would not cheer for her.  Stephen King’s debut novel will always

stand the test of time despite the famous legend of his wife, Tabitha, rescuing the manuscript from the trash before it became the timeless adolescent tragedy it is.  Everyone enduring the high school experience, particularly those who were persecuted, not only wants Carrie White to triumph over her tormentors, but they welcome Carrie’s phoenix-like evolution into a walking Hell on Earth.  She should’ve survived, fairness rules applying.  Despite becoming a murderess, we wanted Carrie White to live, despite her volatile Catholic guilt dictating otherwise.  Nobody playing her in the many adaptations of Carrie displayed both her fragility and fury better than Sissy Spacek in 1976.  The same with her film mother, Piper Laurie, as the bible-thrashing Margaret White.  Horror, much less film in general, had never seen the likes of either.  Powerful performances of powerful women doomed to meet and die in each other’s arms at the gates of purgatory. The transition in horror over the next couple decades from laughable shlock like The Crawling Eye to roles planting aggressive women at the forefront of the story like Repulsion, The Exorcist, Psycho, Rosemary’s Baby, Play Misty For Me, Eyes Without a Face and Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? showed women possess as dark as a side as any man, given provocation, wherewithal, stamina and/or supernatural elements guiding a chemical shakeup.  It would take most of the 1980s to catch back up to this trailblazing thesis after one film both revolutionized the role of a woman as survivalist and, unfortunately, exploited the subversive titillation factor which the decade ran mad with:  John Carpenter’s original Halloween. When we think of the quintessential female badass of horror, the de facto crown goes straight to Jamie Lee Curtis.  An idol to many as a pillar of strength, Curtis is still today a statuesque frame of feminine perfection as the stock of Hollywood royalty (Tony Curtis and Janet Leigh).  As horror’s top-reigning “scream queen,” we’ve enjoyed Jamie Lee’s comeuppance through the horror genre as the iconic foil to her pasty-face masked nemesis (and her one-time brother before the age of retcon), Michael Myers, in the Halloween series.  Curtis also appeared in lesser-discussed horror pieces like Terror Train and the original versions of The Fog and Prom Night before heading toward comedy, drama and action films and later, as an author of children’s books.  An unparalleled leader of women. We all fell in love with Jamie Lee Curtis as extemporal babysitter Laurie Strode in her original run in 1978, where she was more on the lam in nerve-wracking pursuit by Myers.  Yet it was that ironbound instinct inside of Laurie Strode which made us applaud her.  Laurie Strode has already been on edge, convinced she’s being stalked through the first half hour of Halloween.  When this manifests into its ugliest form, Strode’s early-on maternal instincts kick in to protect her elementary-aged charges in the face of sure slaughter.  Down the road, an older Laurie Strode would have a satisfying return grudge match against Michael Myers in 1998’s Halloween:  H20, only to go balls-out against him in 2018 in a wholly re-imagined Halloween which delivered the goods—even if its successors, Halloween Kills and Halloween Ends were insufferable wastes of Curtis’ talents.  Give it to Curtis, though; all the Halloween movies she’s appeared in, nobody’s handed Michael Myers his sadistic ass more times, notwithstanding the inglorious Halloween:  Resurrection. While Halloween took the next step in horror evolution which Curtis’ own mother staked in 1960’s Psycho, the true dawn of the slasher film stepped out of the throttled safety zone of an idyllic suburbia and dropped with a creepy echo of ki ki ki…ma ma ma… into an equally tranquil summer camp via 1980’s Friday the 13th.  Horror in the Eighties feasted on a rowdy diet of gore one-uppance, boob flashing, marijuana glorification and, of course, women largely existing to be chopped as objects of subjugated meat.

  Things have come a long way since Slumber Party Massacre.  The Friday the 13th series, which was party time at the cinema for my generation, did redefine a woman’s place inside a slasher pic, albeit with caveats, which the original Scream righteously called shade upon. Adrienne King, Amy Steel, Dana Kimmell and later down the line, Lar Park Lincoln, were all survivors of their bloodthirsty attackers.  None of them have sex inside their respective first, second, third and seventh films.  I do issue further caveats that King dies in the beginning of Friday the 13th Part 2 (like this is a spoiler?) and it’s presumed Steel had off-camera sex with her boyfriend, Paul, while Kimmell testifies to a glorious love affair with her love interest, Rick, who instantly looks to have a return slip of the sausage upon their reunion in Part III.  King tokes the ganja in the original Friday, but cutting slack to all of these ladies, each of them ran for their lives with the knife’s edge in their wake, yet all them delivered savage responses to their assaulters. Only King gets the distinction of putting Mama Voorhees (the incomparable Betsy Palmer whom I had the joy of interviewing for Metal Maniacs magazine) down permanently.  Should we give Palmer props for being one of the genre’s first serial killers?  Absolutely, even if it’s gore maestro Tom Savini doing the stalking, laughing out loud.  Though as Betsy told me and other interviewers, she did Friday the 13th strictly to get the money to a buy a new car to move forward in life.  Pamela Voorhees unintentionally became bigger than her, and Betsy Palmer has already been a household name on Candid Camera, I’ve Got a Secret, Studio One in Hollywood and The Goodyear Playhouse.  One of the few heralded women of 1950s entertainment. Sigourney Weaver showed the world what one woman left to fend for herself and a cat could do on a space freighter as huge as a Scottish castle, all of her shipmates mauled, in 1978’s Alien, one the most calamitous sci-fi/horror hybrids imagined.  Weaver’s Lt. Ellen Ripley is one of the hallmarks of cinematic achievements for the advancement of women, even more so for her grunt-like manhandling of the ostensible xenomorphs in the gangbusters 1986 sequel, Aliens.  Ripley became such a household name of feminine muscularity Aliens director James Cameron had no choice but to buff up his darling on-the-run Sarah Connor into a female survivalist who could stand tall in the cumbersome shadow of Arnold Schwarzenegger for the senses-raking Terminator 2:  Judgment Day.             If you’re talking women who just wouldn’t take it anymore, there was Farrah Fawcett in the harrowing made-for-television retaliation piece The Burning Bed.  Mother’s Day from 1980 was a sick yet appropriately gruesome revenge yarn in which two of three kidnapped women get vicious payback upon two horse-faced rapists and their appalling mother.  The Drano down Ike’s throat bit remains one of the most rewarding moments of the decade’s kill scenes. Yet there are five words in the horror lexicon most fans think of when it comes to female-dished retribution. I Spit On Your Grave has turned from a cult exploitation film in 1978 to a torture porn phenomenon via its 2010 remake.  Both Camille Keaton and Sarah Butler endured onscreen depravity beyond what any well-paid actress in Hollywood would accept.  There’s suffering for your art, and there’s what these two ladies endured, spending a large chunk of their respective films’ running times naked in grueling, wooded conditions.  Butler herself gave me a candid recount of what it took from her to shoot the Spit remake in an interview we did in 2010, hours after I received the screener for review.  The payoff for Keaton and Butler’s brutalized characters presents some of the grisliest get-backs ever portrayed on film. Gore geeks delight in Sarah Butler’s revenge, i.e. feeding one of her attackers his own castrated member and plugging the unscrupulous sheriff’s butt with his own shotgun.

  The original I Spit On Your Grave and its direct remake exists as warnings there are repercussions to sexual cruelty, in particular against women.  The 2010 version has such a rabid fan base it makes “Films You Must See Before You Die” lists.  Only the atrocities flung throughout Cannibal Holocaust and The Human Centipede provide more discomfiture. Stephen King, the master of the macabre, has given us a rich pantheon of horror heroes and villains for more nearly 50 years, and amongst his most memorable female survivalists would be Donna Trenton in Cujo (brought to vivid, tragic believability by Dee Wallace Stone in the movie adaptation), Beverly Marsh from It, even Wendy Torrance, who was far stronger in King’s novel than Shelley Duvall’s often cherished mousy interpretation.  Rose the Hat and Abra Stone in Doctor Sleep are survivalists in their own way, though approaching their ideals and one another from opposite sides of the morality line.  Then there’s Jessie Burlingame’s cuffed ordeal in the just-wrong Gerald’s Game.  Let’s not forget the more recent “Gwendy” trilogy shared in writing between King and his trusted collaborator, Richard Chizmar.  Gwendy has become a figurative pillar of strength throughout her narrative, having thrust upon her an enchanted button box filled with temptation and the means to end our entire world.  Survival of the human race pending one woman’s scruple set put to a prolonged test. We can talk about Heather Langenkamp, aka Nancy from the Nightmare On Elm Street movies as one of the genre’s definitive badass lady survivalists, since she’s gone dream-to-dream against the original knives-out badboy, Freddy Krueger three times along with appearances in Shocker, Home, Sub, Truth or Dare and Hellraiser:  Judgment.  Is there anything more satisfying in than watching Neve Campbell match wits against all of the Ghost Faces she’s had thrust upon her in the Scream flicks? In the video game world, Lara Croft is recognized as the leading female badass for the Tomb Raider series, which may be more in the action realm, yet there are plenty of horror elements Croft faces down.  Claire Redfield is perhaps video game’s CGI poster babe from the Resident Evil series, but never eff with her.  The lady knows her way around weaponry as much as Ghost from Call of Duty.  Ellie from The Last of Us games has evolved into a zombie-chewing grinder in her adult life and her character has pushed the envelope with her sexuality.  Ellie is finding even greater life through HBO’s excellent new adaptation series.  The gamers may hate on the televised version, but the horror fans are wonky for The Last of Us.  While ladies in horror comic books have long been demoted in much the same fashion as those ‘50s B movies, go back and dive into the EC horror classics like Tales From the Crypt, The Vault of Horror and The Haunt of Fear.  The ladies may be lovesick saps at times, but more often than not, they’re just as, if even more conniving than the male antagonists.  Revenge-driven stories are galore in those deliciously gross vignettes.  Most of the horror hijinks are calculated by women, either for selfish gain or they’re just plain nuts; or on the flipside, they’re receiving justice keeper assistance from the grave. If you’re a horror hound, the name Vampirella is second-to-none when it comes to vampirism lore.  Yeah, she dashes around in thongs and that goofy collared sling barely keeping her top goodies shelved.  Part of the sexual revolution of the 1970s in which she was born.  Sleaze factor aside, Vampi is still a badass mama who’ll rip you apart, demon, vamp or fiend, and she’s in rowdy company with her monster maven cohorts, Pantha and Draculina.  Vampi is now celebrating 50 years, the nonpareil survivalist of comic book nosferatu.  Other longtime women haunting comics are Lady Death, Purgatori, Avengelyne, Jennifer Blood, Sara Pezzini, aka the Witchblade and of course, the imitable Goth goddess from The Sandman books, Death.

Perhaps one of the most memorable images in horror not yet mentioned is the final moments of The Descent, one of the greatest modern horror films along with Let Me In/Let The Right One In, It Follows, Hereditary, Get Out and Us.  I sat there thunderstuck my first time watching The Descent once Sarah (Shauna MacDonald) finally escapes her spelunking trip gone disastrous.  The story already set up with the calamity Sarah’s endured from the loss of her family in the beginning of the story, her bloody climb out of the caves with her friends lost to her, the sting of betrayal and those cave mutants in hot pursuit is exhausting.  Especially if you’re claustrophobic and managed to make it all the way through the film.  The way Sarah speeds away crying with David Julyan’s heartbreaking score whirling overtop her anguish…it’s one of the most humanistic scenes of shattered continued existence ever conceived. We’ve seen female lycanthrope shred their victims in The Howling movies and we’ve seen gals lay booby traps even John Rambo would geek over in You’re Next.  Samara Weaving had the wool pulled over her eyes on her wedding night, but she served her new in-laws in the often hilarious Ready or Not.  Danai Gurira is a beacon of strength for women, not only as Michonne Hawthorne, but also as Dora Milaje general Okoye in the Black Panther films.  The ladies have finally found their voice in horror, and it’s not just a high-pitched falsetto to the tune of dark fate.  Emily Blunt spoke volumes without having to use hers hardly at all in both A Quiet Place films.  Naomi Harris’ handiwork with a machete in 28 Days Later?  It sang a sanguinary tune that women in horror have become simply bad…ass…

[battyaboutbooksreviews]

💖 Sapphic Books Coming Out May 2024

🩷 There's something especially sweet about a sapphic romance. Here are only a few of the amazing sapphic books hitting shelves in May 2024. Which ones are you adding to your ever-growing TBR?

Contemporary 💖 Here For the Wrong Reasons - Annabel Paulsen & Lydia Wang 💖 Perfume & Pain - Anna Dorn 💖 Cheryl - Jillian Fleck 💖 A Little Kissing Between Friends - Chencia C. Higgins 💖 Lavash At First Sight - Taleen Voskuni 💖 The Game of Giants - Marion Douglas 💖 We Were the Universe - Kimberly King Parsons 💖 Oye - Melissa Mogollon 💖 The Summer Love Strategy - Ray Stoeve 💖 Noah Frye Gets Crushed - Maggie Horne 💖 Halfway to Harbor - Nicole Melleby 💖 Sunhead - Alex Assan

💖 The 7-10 Split - Karmen Lee 💖 Trust & Safety - Laura Blackett & Eve Gleichman 💖 Second Night Stand - Karelia Stetz-Waters & Fay Stetz-Waters 💖 How It Works Out - Myriam Lacroix 💖 April May June July - Alison B. Hart 💖 The Ride of Her Life - Jennifer Dugan 💖 One Night With the CEO - Emily Hayes 💖 Dulhaniyaa - Talia Bhatt 💖 A Girl Can Dream - Emily Barr 💖 I Want You More - Swan Huntley 💖 Exhibit - R. O. Kwon 💖 Only a Bridesmaid - Haley Donnell

💖 Thirsty - Jas Hammonds 💖 Housemates - Emma Copley Eisenberg 💖 Don’t Be a Drag - Skye Quinlan 💖 True Love and Other Impossible Odds - Christina Li 💖 Murray Out of Water - Taylor Tracy 💖 The Redemption of Daya Keane - Gia Gordon 💖 Blame My Virgo Moon - Freja Nicole Woolf 💖 From Where We Are - Nicole Zelniker 💖 Cabin Fever - Tagan Shepard 💖 Channel Surfing in the Sea of Happiness - Guy Babineau 💖 Meet Me in Berlin - Samantha L. Valentine 💖 Behind You - Catherine Hernandez

Paranormal/Horror 💖 Primal Hunt - L.L. Raand 💖 Blood on the Tide - Katee Robert 💖 We Mostly Come Out at Night - (ed) Rob Costello 💖 Flowers from the Void - Gianni Washington 💖 My Darling Dreadful Thing - Johanna van Veen 💖 When the Devil - Emma E. Murray 💖 Honeybites - I. S. Belle 💖 My Favorite Thing Is Monsters - Emil Ferris 💖 The Worst Perfect Moment -Shivaun Plozza

Fantasy 💖 The Honey Witch - Sydney J. Shields 💖 The Fireborne Blade - Charlotte Bond 💖 Chained Destinies - D. Jordan Redhawk 💖 Can’t Spell Treason Without Tea - Rebecca Thorne 💖 Grand Slam Romance: Major League Hotties - Ollie Hicks & Emma Oosterhous 💖 Snake Charming - Genevieve McCluer 💖 The Witches of Silverlake - Simon Curtis 💖 Death’s Country - R. M. Romero 💖 Snowblooded - Emma Sterner-Radleygh 💖 Bird Suit - Sydney Hegele 💖 Farzana's Spite - Felix Graves

Historical 💖 The Good Women of Fudi - Liu Hong 💖 Spitting Gold - Carmella Lowkis 💖 Adrift - Sam Ledel 💖 A Heart Divided - Angie Williams 💖 A Liaison with Her Leading Lady - Lotte R. James

Mystery/Thriller 💖 The Deadly Spark - Roxie Key 💖 The Advice Columnist - Cade Haddock Strong 💖 The Lilies - Quinn Diacon-Furtado 💖 Loyalty - E. J. Noyes 💖 Clean Kill - Anne Laughlin 💖 Have You Seen This Girl - Nita Tyndall 💖 The Last to Pie - Misha Popp

Sci-Fi 💖 The Sunforge - Sascha Stronach 💖 Road to Ruin - Hana Lee 💖 Exile in Guyville - Amy Lee Lillard 💖 The Lily of Enarah - Arden Brax 💖 The Z Word - Lindsay King-Miller

[imagine-loki]

Imagine catching Loki’s attention by wearing a t-shirt depicting a giant manta ray wearing his horns and cloak along with the phrase ‘majestic sea flap flap’