#RQG 155

[loverboybrightsideghost]

rqg the first time around: haha this carter guy is so funny and useless

rqg first relisten: noooo be nice to himmm :(((

rqg first relisten after reading placeholder:

[twinksintrees]

ZOLF IS STRESS BAKING OHMYGOD

[radiantmists]

Okay so I hadnt quite been grasping what was meant when zolf says hes a cleric of "what comes next", because I was thinking of afterlives and so on.

But through all this discussion of persisting despite past wrongs and doing what you can to make things better because at the end thats what there is, I realized he means this idea of focusing on what comes next for you personally, on learning from your past but not letting it stop your work toward the future.

I'm glad we see Zolf struggle with this, because that honestly sounds more like something hamid would have subscribed to back at the beginning of the podcast than something the zolf we knew could have reached.

But for me, this realization came by remembering a quote from another murderdad: what is the most important step a man can take?

[morphokal]

SKRAAK! Eeeeeeeee!

[shy-magpie]

RQG 155

Wherein there are unexpected visitors. Live blog under the cut

Pre episode babbling:  there really wasn't any way quarantine was going to last as long as the dungeon crawl, and (for all I joked about it) I really am satisfied with what we got. That was a lot of backstory and character moments in a short amount of time. Now we have a kobold, a mysterious attack on the inn, and an episode title referencing dragons? Nice consolation for them almost certainly being forced out of the basement or having plot come to them. Please be Skraak? Please be Skraak either trying to rescue them or at least be here as an ally? Oh well time to hit play: Weird energy? That’s promising Inevitable locked in a Cel(l) joke Zolf needs to be nicer about the Kobolds Alex needs tell us if this is Skraak or not before Hamid gets the blame Skraak(?) Just unlocked the trap door Nice outfit Alex, is it our Skraak? It seems to be Zolf wants Skraak to join them in quarantine. Cel doesn't see why to bother when Skraak's been in contact with hundreds of Kobolds Skraak gestures for them to leave and Zolf is going to be force the issue. This will go over well. Beats his defense by 1 Hamid is trying to play peacemaker again. Really Zolf? Couldn't have calmly refused to leave and explained through the door? I know you are under stress but you are low charisma, not stupid. Love you Cel, Skraak has been speaking to varying degrees since "My Liege" Hamid tries to explain, Zolf speaks over him to say they didn't explain because they forgot. Hamid apologizes to Skraak. Skraak starts to leave. Azu backs Zolf in preventing him from leaving. Skraak is subdued by Zolf & Azu Skraak is locked in with Hamid? No Zolf has some limits thank goodness. He did call Skraak one of them.  Bound but not gagged as Hamid apologizes. Skraak points out that he just has to wait for the rest (of his team?) Skraak "monitor"ed them!?! Holy... I was merely comparing the situations, did he actually scry and see them held by a human in a small space underground beneath a trap door disguised by a table? If he thinks Wilde is their Shoin then how many pieces is he going to be in when Zolf gets out? Kobold lore please! Hierarchy is important and it was "considered a good idea to keep track of the saviors". Skraak is sarcastic in his tone when he uses the term and it sounds like at least Hamid & Azu object the instant they hear it, possibly others. Cel makes a pitch for quarantining the whole inn. Wilde is in the cupboard Zolf asks about the kobold numbers and makes some unnecessary remarks about the village & Jasper in particular being lost as he writes off Japan. Zolf is far too relatable for some who needs to stand the flame down before someone takes it personal. Deciding you've already doomed yourself along with everything you care about is a crappy way to avoid panic in the face of uncertainty. Cel tries to call him on it, he switches to "everyone else is infected and it will be our job to fight them". Scary thing is, while in the long term it would be a suicide mission, with their combined abilities they could make a serious dent in the numbers. Hope they are aware of the Hiroshima comparison if this is leading to calling for a air strike on Japan. They explain what little they know to Skraak who insists none of the Kobolds were sick but may not understand the symptoms. Possible kobold immunity? Gonna be annoyed if something Shoin did protected them. Skraak seems to be saying that no new people were exposed since his party of 7 followed the route of the party. Zolf wants to send them back under Skraak's guard to prevent any more coming for them. And they're back. Cel points out its better Skraak came since the kobolds didn't know to implement quarantine. They go upstairs. They form a phalanx and draw spear against the party when they don't see either Hamid or Skraak. Alex & Ben are doing the "these lines are already written we have but to speak them" routine while Bryn points out Alex doesn't get to sound like that when he's the one doing it. Very Hamid, if you know how this is going to play out and don't like it, just make another choice. Initiative and a lot of dice. Grapple rules. Not clear where Cel is/if they got grappled but it sounds like Zolf did and is throwing them off so he can check on the inn keeper. Hamid runs upstairs and every one of them kneels like Skraak did at their first meeting. Helen & Bryn both sound distressed. Should have cleaned up that unreadable little ficlet I made of Hamid going bad because he didn't know how to handle Kobold worship and accidentally took over Japan because he thought autonomy meant respecting their decision to look to him as their leader. The innkeeper is bound but fine. Zolf unties him and looks for Wilde. "Wilde is also bound and... Has a look best described as "the bleep? "" Zolf is a stress cooker and Barnes updates Hamid is flustered and embarrassed which buys him some small grace from Skraak who explains Hamid is "the biggest dragon here" Cel: Also you could introduce the concept of democracy. Eh skip em straight to anarcho communism if you ask me. Group decision meetings rather than just vote for the head dragon Hamid tries to side step a bit by suggesting they explain the situation and asks for their names. Hope Alex thought to name all seven before the cast does.  Siggif the kobold might be pushing it. "Hamid the polite tyrant"-Lydia Break Alex skips them to "a large dinner" cooked by Zolf who got a nat 20 on how good it is. Cel speaks draconic. Neither Zolf nor Azu can make out the difference in their names. Because Alex is like that: didn't want to come up with 7 names, did want to block anyone else naming them. Bryn however has all 6 names and is going to give Azu & Zolf their translations. They aren't interested in the rest of the party and "insist on maintaining a guard phalanx around Hamid at all times". Helen points out this is Bryn's fault. Yeah he's been playing with Alex long enough to know "King of the Kobolds" would come back to bite him. Hamid should be embarrassed. Hamid is sat at the head of the table by the Kobolds. Skraak: it'll pass eventually Zolf: good Aw Cel asks about traditional kobold food and Skraak has to struggle to remember. (Cel seems disappointed meal worm burgers would be poisonous to non kobolds) Zolf is a grumpy boy Long story short it seems to be a controlled risk: no contact off the island; no reason to believe the kobolds are infected Kobolds might be immune Oh screw Shoin (sent waves of Kobolds as dungeon monsters) Zolf doesn't think that the level of contact the Kobolds had with infected adventurers without being infected is proof since they don't know how the infection is passed or activated. Hamid says they shouldn't rely on it but its reason to hope. Zolf needs to remember that team moral is a thing and quit taking things from Hamid especially in a way that could piss off their new housemates. Thank you Azu! Hamid is not stupid! You can say there is reason for hope and still be careful Hamid calls him on jumping down his throat at the slightest provocation, reminds him they talked about this and that trying to stay positive is not a crime. God it's weird relating to both sides of this argument. My bias is towards Hamid as being right, but Zolf is so relatable. You have any idea how hard it can be not to snap at some of these kids they are setting themselves up for heart break when they talk about school in the fall or hug piles at cons? Thank you Cel Zolf is going to leave and sit on the coast behind the inn because he considers the quarantine broken not expanded. Backing out of an unproductive conversation, especially one were others have pointed out you are being harmful is valid, giving into "burn it all" moods is not. Hamid moves to stop him because he gets that the inn is now their cell Wilde calls him back and says he was building to them talking to the borb. So there is a reason he's the boss. Zolf declares he wants some time not thinking about this, which is what he should have done several paragraphs ago. Ffs this can not be the first time he's had it strike hot/destructive instead of cold/immobilizing; it sucks but you don't let yourself make any permanent decisions, stay away from the breakables and try not to talk to much, it passes. Cel suggests he go to one of the upstairs rooms instead, he accepts the redirect with ill grace but does accept it. Barnes has pointed out that locking everyone in a small box makes things worse not better before. Aw did Alex not like the fandom begging for the platonic version of the lock em in a closet until they sort out their feelings trope? Azu: I thought we could make friends Cel: he seems quite opposed to that Azu: I feel like he'd be a really good friend but not very friendly if you know what I mean Cel:we I know he hasn't been at all friendly Azu: you're friendly! Cel: well thank you, I do try Azu: I think you are my friend Cel: I am so honored! Thank you so much Azu! That's delightful Carter declares Cel the only friendly one because he is grumpy about Azu stepping on him, stopping him from breaking quarantine, and drank all the good stuff. Barnes suggests they start fresh in the morning. Skraak explains the kobolds are expecting Hamid to step into Shoin's role as tyrant just one they like. Skraak: even if they know you're not a tyrant, neither they nor me will be abandoning you because that's how Kobolds work. Good Hamid is taking this seriously Oh no pressure Skraak The most chill inn keeper in the world Skip to lunch time Zolf is still making himself scarce, which is not the worst way to handle it  dawning on you THAT YOU TRIED TO DESTROY A RELATIONSHIP YOU VALUE BECAUSE YOU WERE IN A MOOD Bryn makes the "he's secretly infected" joke. Bryn spotted the veins in discord avatar thing and Alex sounds so pleased Wilde is fine, stop asking Oh really we needed that insight in how Wilde thinks Brorb on the table Cel asks for a list of stuff to make into a Brorb access device. Between their bags of holding they have enough stuff for them to make do. Azu seeks out Zolf while Hamid & the Kobolds help Cel. No strike that she waits until someone needs to grab him for the Brorb interview. Alex! Ending on Azu finding Zolf staring out the window.

[archived-lara]

Is it just me or is it incredibly rude of Rusty Quil to take away stabby character played by Lydia Nicholas lately.

I feel like Jonny listened to Ancient Rome sidequest and just turned to Alex and went; No no this is how you get rid of stabby girl™. Watch me do it in a way that people are somewhat happy they loose her!

[esperanzagalaxy]

for requests, skraak got described with this cool cowl and mask thing in 155 that no one besides me ever seems to draw him in? so i'd love to see that in your style (maybe with 'heroic complexity'?) or for something simpler/softer, grizzop and sasha hanging out

  RQG request #30! listen, i KNOW i asked for palette prompts but. i got out my dry pastels to dick around a little anddddd i kind of forgot. sorry about that, but thank you for your request!! i had indeed forgotten about his cool cowl and mask. which is a shame, because he looks really good with them. hope you like it!! i had a lot of fun with it!!

 dry pastels on brown paper.

 ID under the cut!

[ID: a traditional illustration of skraak wearing the cowl and mask he wore in episode 155. it's drawn with dry pastels on brown paper, with sienna, burnt sienna, white and black. he's shown from the waist up, facing right but turning towards the viewer. he's holding a syringe spear up on hiw right claw, the only visible one. the cowl is long and it has holes for his four pointy horns to poke out. the half-mask is silver, and he's wearing a shiny breastplate and pauldrons. he has a stern, neutral expression. end ID]

[arianwells]

I posted 13,757 times in 2022

367 posts created (3%)

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I tagged 7,133 of my posts in 2022

Only 48% of my posts had no tags

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Longest Tag: 138 characters

#between people who are pretending that everything is fine and people who are just overflowing with hatred what are you supposed to even do

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

“Your god is rising in your throats and in your lungs as you croak maddened hosannas, together.

A bright new colour you can finally see.

An old song you’ve always known, even if you kept on forgetting it.

And the white crocus splits the trembling concrete like lightning splits the sky…

...as something new…

...as something new begins.”

408 notes - Posted July 19, 2022

#4

Baru Fisher Cormorant.

432 notes - Posted May 6, 2022

#3

“Alive, bitch,” I said.

555 notes - Posted September 11, 2022

#2

A different bird.

ID under the cut

[ID: a digital drawing showing a raven with white feathers, it’s suspended in the air with its wings folded. Its eyes are black. There are 5 Luminary cards falling down under the raven. The cards are orange with golden suns drawn on them. The background is dull grey and blue, with golden specks on it, there are a few constellations, also golden. End ID]

590 notes - Posted January 11, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

You’re her mausoleum

738 notes - Posted August 20, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[mostlyanything19]

I posted 3.637 times in 2021

471 posts created (13%)

3166 posts reblogged (87%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 6.7 posts.

I added 3.290 tags in 2021

#critical role - 944 posts

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#und ich glaub auch das hört nie auf; egal ob jetzt romantisch oder platonisch in zukunft aber die beiden sind unheimlich wichtig füreinander

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Imogen on her first attack: “Hm I guess I’m gonna give this guy a real bad headache to throw him off kilter”

Imogen on her second attack: “After seeing what he did to Laudna, my eyes start to flash white and my hands start flickering brighter, and I’m gonna cast witch bolt. Straight at his heart.”

190 notes • Posted 2021-10-31 02:15:50 GMT

#4

Is that a framed collage with both of their childhood photos in it ashfkshdjsfhsj PLEASE

IT IS

191 notes • Posted 2021-04-18 19:58:33 GMT

#3

Vax, Percy and Scanlan vs. a door that’s not even locked, just barred by a kinda heavy thing of wood.

On their side: An ineffective use of Dimension Door, a gnome too small to lift up some wood, Percy’s never-before-used sword that draws its first blood by cutting Scanlan when they all try to lever the door open with it by hanging on it on both sides with it shoved through the crack, an admirable determination to follow this line of action through and NOT go in the broken window literally feet from them, a half-elf that does finally climb in through the window to help the gnome lift the piece of wood but is also too wimpy, a MAGICALLY SUMMONED UNSEEN SERVANT FROM ANOTHER PLANE THAT TRIES TO LIFT WITH THEM AND ROLLS A FUCKING FOUR, and finally, born out of desperation after like twenty minutes, three wasted spells and four points of self-inflicted slashing damage, a completely overkill use of Bigby’s Hand to flick the wooden bar away like a toothpick.

On the door’s side: TECHNICALLY NOTHING.

260 notes • Posted 2021-05-20 22:20:03 GMT

#2

When ur bard breaks up with you only to turn into some rando on the street five minutes later

329 notes • Posted 2021-10-03 18:25:33 GMT

#1

Imogen failing her wisdom save on the thought reading attempt early on, and having to spend the rest of the day in a state of what pretty much amounts to constantly trying to avoid auditory sensory overload is honestly so weirdly relateable.

She keeps trying to steer everyone to the secluded corners of the tavern and away from the crowds because she can’t seem to turn off hearing the barrage of thought input from the people around, and even says to Laudna afterwards that she had trouble following the actual conversation at the table because of it. Like, girl I feel you. Try being autistic and sitting in a crowded restaurant on a day where you’re not completely at 100% and it’s pretty much the exact same experience.

743 notes • Posted 2021-10-22 19:44:03 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[yamikakyuu]

I posted 1,591 times in 2021

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#ignore the proportions...i really liked how zolf turned out and couldn't get wilde to match up size wise

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

155 Azu (about Zolf) : I feel like he'd be a really good friend, but he doesn't seem friendly.

208: azu and zolf bicep grab

CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT YES

108 notes • Posted 2021-09-02 05:13:02 GMT

#4

Shout out to Helen Gould, RQ Monarch and best Rusty Quiller for basically articulating everything I felt during every Zolf and Wilde interaction. MVP.

160 notes • Posted 2021-12-02 14:05:17 GMT

#3

Has this been done?

222 notes • Posted 2021-04-23 15:55:07 GMT

#2

MR NEWALL

291 notes • Posted 2021-11-11 13:24:22 GMT

#1

The visual image of Zolf sitting there holding his life partner who is just sobbing, then looking over and going "is that Brutor?" is so damn funny.

325 notes • Posted 2021-12-01 21:54:53 GMT

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[bare1ythere]

I'm listening to RQG 155 and Bryn just got Alex to timeskip to the end of the quarantine period and Alex, jokingly annoyed, just bluntly said "So Barnes and Carter are infected," and he didn't laugh or clarify!! Until Helen freaked out!! THE FEAR THAT JUST RAN THROUGH ME?? HELLO???

[celsidebottom]

I just love when Helen yells at Alex and breaks out the full name card again

[Transcript:

Alex: That’s fine.  We’ll jump to the end of the quarantine period and that’s the time it takes Cel to make all of this setup in such a way that Shoin can’t take over it all.  Fine!  Carter is infected and Barnes is infected.  So...

Helen: What?  No!

Alex: I’m kidding, I’m kidding.

Helen: Ugh!!  No, you can’t say things like that Alexander!!!]

[thevoidcannotbefilled]

Spoilers up to RQG 155

Let's talk about Hamid.

I was about Hamid telling Zolf that he's grown as a person and a leader and that as a result that Zolf should take him more seriously. That scene was brought up again this episode when Zolf was telling Hamid off for hoping the kobolds were immune.

But, to me there's an issue here, the scene right before rhe party is put in the cell, Hamid used the stone to call his brother DESPITE knowing that he shouldn't.....because he wanted to.

To me, that's not the sign of someone who is a mature leader. This is someone who has experience, sure, but doesn't self-reflect or is self-aware enough to realize he needs to put aside his own feelings for the whole.

It's partly trauma, yes, but there is a level of immaturty there as well that is from square 1 Hamid. Hamid has been going SO long trying to get the approval of those around him that now he finally has power and the skill to back it up, he constantly defends himself and his decisions, even when he shouldn't. He also has an awful time of sitting down and accepting new ideas unless they're directly hitting him in the face.

So, when looking back, Hamid is telling Zolf "I am mature and better than I was before" RIGHT AFTER SHOWING HIS INABILTY TO HOLD BACK A BIT, shows just how much Hamid needs to learn. This also can be applied to the scene with the kobolds. At the end of the day, I feel like Zolf was right mostly.

Hope is a powerful thing, but you have to know when and where to place it. The kobolds are such an unknown and there is next to no way to test if they're immune. They don't know HOW this works. For all they know, the disease could have a mind of it's own and can choose when to infect people, and just chose not to infect the kobolds yet.

But to me, it's Hamid's response. Basically "I told you to take me seriously Zolf and you won't listen" and as much as Hamid says he understands the situation.... he hasnt lived it the last two years. I dont know if he can understand.

Hamid wants Zolf to suddenly listen to him, but he doesn't understand that he needs to listen BACK. Needs to respect OTHER'S authority because they have LIVED through this. Be patient and understanding of all this because this trauma

So yes, Zolf was a bit harsh, but Hamid needs to sit back and realize that not EVERYTHING is a personal attack on him and his abilities. Sometimes, you need to put aside your need to get another word in and listen, especially when it's someone you care about and you dont agree with them.

Hamid is still incredibly immature and he isnt ready to lead in something like this. He has hope, but he doesn't have the discipline necessary to protect the people around him.

It makes me worried about the kobolds. Does Hamid have the discipline to be the leader the kobolds need them to be while they're still following him?

I don't know if he does.

This is probably going to be a defining moment for Hamid. Where the kobolds need him to put aside his own wants and needs for the sake of them when everything in him wants to do the opposite. There won't be an easy answer or a choice, and there won't be an easy way to party or talk his way out of it.

"Don't mess it up. You haven't yet." But the question is, will he?

[thechekhov]

Mini-rant under the cut, just need to get this off my chest. Absolutely not directed at anyone specific, just a word vomit to get it out of my system.

(re: episode 155 of RQG, anger management, problematic characters and personal thoughts)

Okay so I'm gonna preface this with - this isn’t meant to be vague-posting about anyone, this is just for my own catharsis. If you disagree with me, that’s obviously cool. 

So I've seen lots of fan reactions to the past few episodes on Twitter, the Discord, Tumblr, etc. And I noticed an interesting trend: overall, people seem to overwhelmingly side with Zolf in his tirade, and appear to be largely sympathetic to his anger and outbursts.

Which, okay, understandable. He's the "sad sea dad" of the group, being grumpy and depressed is now apparently his... Thing? People acknowledge he's not being nice, but they find it acceptable given the circumstances.

Alongside that, we have Hamid, who is also a little bundle of problems - his privilege, his disregard for safety in phoning Ishmael, his kobold monarch issue he is not handling super well (granted, it's early yet.)

What's personally frustrating to me is that people are so eager to jump to defend Zolf's anger management issues and outbursts as forgivable on the basis of "oh he's clearly depressed" while giving Hamid no leeway for his own trauma, his age, and his lack of experience.

And - fuck I gotta say it - as someone who has lived a good chunk of my life with people like Zolf (emotionally explosive, distant, unable to look on the bright side - wow that's my stepfather!) that hits a little too close to home.

To be honest... This is a Fantasy Podcast! I want my Fantasy Problems. I don't want 'angry, reactive father figure that reminds you of all the people in your life that are incapable of doing anything other than dragging you down to their level'. I want 'naive, vain, spoiled halfling who needs to teach Kobolds democracy and realize that he has too much power and needs to control it'. Because honestly, that, to me, is way more comfortable. That's my escapism!

And no offense to Ben whatsoever but Zolf and Grizzop honestly both have that problem. They are very similar. They are reactionary, angry, and incapable of listening to people outside their narrow worldview. They are also both OK with killing for their god and have morally questionable limits of what is and isn’t a line to cross in terms of getting the job done, so I don’t want to hear about how Hamid is the only murderer. (He played this up with Grizzop even more.) And people LOVE them. Grizzop’s frankly fascistic worldview gets NO honorable mention because.... Paladins, amirite? Meanwhile Hamid's flavor of dumb is apparently unacceptable??

Honestly I understand Zolf and I know he's right about many things. But he broods and avoids the topics he really needs to confront Hamid about and instead mutters about him being a 'Messiah' and then, when Hamid has a good reason to be optimistic, Zolf fucking explodes on him for nothing else except daring to think the Kobolds MIGHT be immune. Cleric of Hope my ass! 

He had so many opportunities to actually speak reason into Hamid and tell him to cut out the King of Kobolds business! But did he? No! Instead he kept quiet and fumed, and chose to reprimand Hamid for daring to consider Skraak's idea as a potential possibility (would he have exploded at SKRAAK like that, I wonder? Hmmmm?), and then promptly disengaged. Where's HIS growth, huh? Where is the 'I have decided to talk about my emotions' Zolf???? Bring HIM back!

Anyway, the point is, they're both flawed characters. And I really like them both! They have potential to grow!! That's what makes it entertaining.

But frankly, I find Hamid's flaws a bit more interesting than the good ol' Patriarchy standard "emotionally constipated man forces the rest of the group to worry about him after yelling for the wrong reason". And I do not see this point of view anywhere, and it’s making me feel like I’m being unreasonable for enjoying the progression of Hamid’s megalomaniac ass learning his lessons the hard way more than watching yet another family fall all over themselves to put a bandaid over Zolf’s emotional boo-boos while he fights them every step of the way in order to continue to stare out the window sadly.

URGH. Okay I’m done, I swear. I do love them all. But the way some issues are parsed on the fan side make me feel like I’m missing a part of the story.

[morphokal]

the image of Hamid teaching Cel to speak Draconic...

[currycurrie]

Next RQG fic prompt fill! AO3 link. Based on the prompt asking for Zolf & Azu talking about Sasha. Mild spoilers for episode 155!

---

"I think you have killed it."

Azu had walked into the inn's kitchen to find Zolf beating a section of dough into such submission that it would likely not come out as anything but flatbread at this point.

At hearing Azu's words Zolf stopped his merciless bludgeoning of the dough and turned around to face her, arms crossed, breathing heavily, and covered head to toe in a light dusting of flour. He did not say anything, but tilted his head to signal he was waiting for her to continue speaking.

"I am… Hmm…" Azu paused to consider her words, "You are a hypocrite."

"Oh. Right. Excellent." Zolf threw his arms in the air in frustration releasing a cloud of flour with them. "That's exactly what I needed to hear in this exact moment. Thought you Aphrodite lot were all about compassion and empathy, yeah? You are bad at your job."

Zolf huffed, and made a move to exit the kitchen. Azu for her part anticipated this and used her large frame to block the entirety of the doorway. She looked down at Zolf who had stopped directly in front of her and he raised his head to meet her gaze.

"I will not take that personally, Zolf. I just wanted to return the favor for the conversation we had on the way back from Shoin's. You told me not to hide my emotions, that it would destroy me, and here you are hiding from all of us. I want to talk about this. Maybe you have not destroyed yourself yet, but I do not think that the bread you are making deserves this."

"Now is not a good time, Azu." Zolf replied not breaking eye contact and demeanor dripping with malice, "Please move."

Azu widened her stance like she was readying for a fight, and squinted down at Zolf, "It will never be a good time. Did you put yeast in that dough?"

Zolf just blinked at her, dumbfounded by the oddness of the question. "...No?"

"Good. You may not be ready to talk, but I will not let you sacrifice our dinner for the sake of your anger." Azu relaxed her stance and walked past Zolf over to the counter and the abandoned, sad lump of dough. "I am going to teach you how to make chapati. It is a bread we made in my village and very good with stews."

Azu began to busy herself with gathering ingredients as Zolf stared. She did not say anything or so much as glance over at him, just busied herself with the task of cooking.

Despite himself, Zolf was hungry, and maybe if he went through the motions of whatever this was he could get it over with as quickly as possible. So they began to work together in silence, Azu fussing over the bread and Zolf largely forgoing that task in favor of getting a stew going. While it was incredibly awkward at first, they did eventually settle into a rhythm.

Some time into their tasks, Zolf found that there was nothing else to do with the stew except let it sit and cook, and he became frustratingly idle. He looked at Azu who was still kneading and folding a much more cohesive looking lump of dough than what he had originally made.

"So…" Zolf spoke, but Azu still did not look up at him, seemingly engrossed in her task. "What is chapati?"

"It is a many layered bread with no yeast that is usually used for dipping. Sometimes you can put honey on it to have it with breakfast instead. You fry it instead of baking it. It was very common in my village and I miss it. The bread...and my village."

Zolf watched Azu attempt this very intricate spiraling coil with the dough. It looked very messy, but seemed to be working regardless. He took a few steps forward to get a better view.

Azu began to flatten out the spiral into a thin layer, and began speaking again. "My brother, Emeka, used to say the spirals looked like snails. I never liked that because you have to flatten out the spirals so much, and I did not like thinking about doing that to an actual snail."

Azu finished her current spiral, and began rolling it out flat. Zolf took a few more steps forward, finding himself standing next to Azu at the counter. He gingerly reached for a lump of dough and tried to copy what he had watched Azu do. It was clumsy and even messier looking than hers. Azu made no comment as she picked up a new lump of dough to begin the process again.

"I will be honest, I was never very good at making these." Azu wiped a hand across her forehead leaving behind a large streak of flour. "It will not be as good as what I had at home. I also do not think we are using the right flour."

"I'm sure it'll be fine." Zolf responded quietly.

There was another long stretch of silence as they worked together. Azu demonstrated her technique wordlessly as Zolf followed along. There was, blessedly, no awkwardness to this silence, just two people working in tandem.

"This seems like a lot of effort for some bread." Zolf muttered this to himself as he worked, not really aware he had said it out loud.

Azu looked at him this time as she responded, "Sometimes the things that are worth doing are harder to do. Sometimes they are worth doing simply because they are harder to do. Also the texture would be all wrong unless you fold it like this."

"Right." Another few moments of silence passed as they returned to their work. "Hey, Azu?"

"Yes?"

"Do you think there's a chance? That we win? The last time I tried to save the world it ended with blood in the streets of Paris. Among other not so great things."

"Well you are the one that has dedicated yourself to believing in a better world. You tell me."

"If I had an answer I wouldn't be asking."

"That is fair." Azu stopped her current work and turned to fully face Zolf, and seemed to be looking for something in his expression.

"I just, I've already lost so much and things are so bad and I don't even know what winning would look like anymore." Zolf also stopped his work, and leaned against the counter. "Times like this I really miss Sasha."

"I miss her too. She had a certain way of being very practical. Her insight would be very useful right now, I think."

"Yeah, you get it." Zolf suddenly became aware of himself to an uncomfortable degree,  and quickly got back to busying himself. "No messy god stuff, no magic, just a girl and no problem a good knife can't solve."

Azu chuckled at this. "I think she would be very pleased with what we've done."

"Yeah?"

"Yes. We have made things better. The storms have stopped. We are alive and safe for now. We are moving forward. That counts for something."

"Moving forward. Right. Think Sasha would probably kill me if she saw me moping around again. This is a pattern, if you don't know."

"Oh shush." Azu flicked her hand over Zolf's head making flour fall into his hair. "We are moving forward. Change is hard. People are difficult. You do not just decide to completely change who you are overnight and have it stick. You have to work at it."

"Yeah I'm living proof of that."

More work. More comfortable silence.

"Hey Azu, have you finished reading that one Campbell novel I was talking about the other day?"