#Pokemon Incorrect Quotes

[incorrectpokechampionquotes]

Cynthia: Wow, they really hate us.

Diantha: Yes, perhaps because they’re homophobic.

Cynthia: But we’re not gay.

Diantha: …We’re not?

Note: Merry Christmas and happy first day of Hanukkah to those who celebrate!

[blazingstar400]

[bagerfluff]

Gladion: Be careful about succumbing to these sorts of destructive... urges. Addiction can be a powerful thing.

Y/n: So am I. Bow down before your new supreme overlord, bitches.

[shigerussato]

ash flirts with catchphrases from movies, fr fr.

[rwby-encrusted-blog]

~Many years ago~

Turo: The Person I fall in love with and Marry will have to be someone Reserved, and with a calm demeanor-

Sada, eating a Steak like a raccoon: GRRRRR!

Turo: That one, I want that one.

[championfrolicfleece]

Pokemon Sword And Shield Postwick Shipping Incorrect Quotes Part1

Gloria: We have fun, don’t we, Hop?

Hop: I have never been more stressed out in my entire life.

Hop: I literally cannot believe I let you talk me into this.

Gloria: I literally said, “I have an idea,” and you just went along with it without question.

Hop: Can I have 2 straws with that milkshake?

Gloria: Aww-

Hop: With 2 straws, I can drink it double as fast!

Gloria: Three words. Say them and I'm yours.

Hop: Three words.

Gloria: …

Gloria: Ok, maybe playing ‘whose family is most dysfunctional’ wasn’t the best idea we’ve had. Hop's been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can’t get him out…

Gloria: So, what’s for dinner?

Hop, staring at the food they just burnt: Regret.

Hop: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I'll wait.

Gloria: You and me!!!

Hop, tearing up: Okay.

Hop: Can you cut me some slack, Gloria? I’m sort of in love.

Gloria: I’m sorry, but that’s really not my problem.

Hop: I’m in love with you.

Gloria, blushing: Oh. That brings me in the loop a little.

Hop: I have a new hoodie.

Gloria: Wrong. We have a new hoodie.

Hop: I truly go into househusband mode when I'm someone's soulmate- like, I'll make you pancakes and bacon every morning.

Gloria: This is a lie. I'm literally dating them. This is a lie. THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO COOK A PANCAKE, WHAT IS THIS?

Gloria: What? I'm not aggressive!

Hop: Last Tuesday, you bodied me to the floor and stole my wooloo slippers!

Gloria: Survival of the fittest, Hopsy, survival of the fittest!~

Hop: Being half asleep and feeling someone gently plant a kiss on your forehead is one of the purest kinds of love in the world.

Gloria: Unless you're home alone.

Gloria: Ugh, crushes are so dumb.

Hop: I know. Whenever I’m near the person I like I just start acting stupid.

Gloria: But you’re always acting stupid?

Hop: … yeah, don’t think about that too hard.

Gloria: You are an absolute dork.

Hop, singing: Yeah, but I'm your dork!

Gloria, sighs: Yeah, you're my dork.

[thirdlotusprince3]

Brock, teaching Ash to drive: Okay, you're driving and Misty and May walk into the road. Quick, what do you hit? 

Ash: Oh, definitely Misty. I could never hurt May. 

Brock, massaging his temples: The brakes. You hit the brakes.

[nikolaiirl]

Arven: hey y/n? I need to tell you something..

You: okay what is it?

Arven: *sigh* I think I'm falling for you.

You: well then get up silly!

Arven:

[aquariusvulpix]

Ethan: Ok so I did this thing–

Lance: No. It's seven in the mornings and I don't want to hear it. Every time you say that, you have somehow irreversibly destroyed something and I am constantly cleaning up your messes and for once, in the name of damn Arceus, I just want you to take responsibility for something–

Ethan: I was just gonna ask if you wanted toast :(

Lance: Oh. No thank you.

Ethan: Good, because the kitchen’s on fire.

[heytheredahlia]

Scarlet and Violet incorrect quotes, except they're direct quotes from my friends.

Drayton: I can't dress like a hoe at work... unfortunately

~

Drayton: God, my biceps look so good... sorry! No, I'm just so hot-

~

Carmine: Sometimes you just sound so fuckin' white

~

Juliana, floored: Oh my god... Kieran, what am I gonna do with you?

Kieran, very softy: Uhm... I don't know :)

~

Arven, angrily indecisive: Alright, I'm back, now what the fuck do I eat?

Penny: Eat a fuckin' McDick

~

Kieran: Note to self! Don't start fires :)

~

Lacey: Is Drayton good???

Crispin: Drayton's drunk

Drayton, aggressively slurring: I-I'm not drunk-ah! I'm fine-uh!

~

Penny, singing very loudly to herself, not realizing she's unmuted in a voice call: ... NOW THAT WE DON'T TALK!

Penny, a couple moments later, muttering: Damn, that's such a good song.

Juliana, who has been in call since the start of the song: Hi :)

Penny: (indecipherable shrieks of terror)

~

Florian, talking to Juliana: Then be a whore! Nobody here is gonna judge

Penny, without missing a beat: Juliana, what the fuck is this

Various quotes taken from: @dipplinduo @cosmic-seer @furretd0ll @snobithesnorunt @angelabsol and @kyokokusakabe

[gupdoo3]

Ash, during Indigo League: Hey, everybody, today Gary pushed me so I'm starting a Kickstarter to put him down. The benefits of killing him would be I would get pushed way less.

[incorrectpokechampionquotes]

Lance: Breaking news: Geeta is disappointed in us.

[blazingstar400]

[bagerfluff]

Gladion: It’s not that I don’t trust Y/n, I just... don’t ’t trust their impulse control.

[shigerussato]

them.

[rikaspotting]

Rika: Geeta takes such damn hot showers. I thought the whole bathroom was smokin' when I opened the door when she finally came outta there.

Larry: No surprise. She's practicing burning in Hell.