#Paul Blart the mall fart

[kelp-kp]

An old study of the great Nurzhan Bekkaliyev. Seriously, go check their work out.

[eightertrek]

all fart

paul blart

mall cart

[mrburnsnuclearpussy]

Paul blart mall fart bla bla bla blaaaaa

[borderlands-addict]

paul blart mall fart

[theridgebeyond]

My brother’s been violently snort-laughing for the past 8 minutes. He realized that Paul Blart rhymes with fart.

Paul Fart: Mall Cop

[shiftythrifting]

Was it stolen or does savers do the thing where they keep all the dvd disks in the back? Used CD and DVD place where i used to live did that.

My savers is a chaos zone that doesn't keep the discs and you have to check everything you buy. They are totally hands off since covid, they got self-checkout and everything. Someone really DID steal Paul Blart Mall Fart.

[coolxatu]

has anyone ever said paul blart mall fart

[sagihairius]

paul blart mall fart

First blart I see to fart

I wish I may, I wish I might,

Have this wish I wish tonight

[acrylicqueen]

Luigi and Gooigi: -chanting- "PAUL BLART MALL FART, PAUL BLART MALL FART"

Kruller: "STOP CALLING ME THAT"

[vodkachipmunk]

paul blart mall cop

blart paul mall blall

paul blart mall blart

baul plart mall bart

mall paul blart cart

blart cop mart cop

call blart paul mop

maul clart ball pop

poop fart mop bop

american thanksgiving is a sham. give money to indigenous people and watch paul blart mall cop 2

[sbnkalny]

i watched paul blart mall cop 2 probably five times over a period of six days and this is Real Shit. i could go into more detail if you'd like kalny

Paul blart snart fart. So like, I go into withdrawals.

[frogspencer]

paul blart is a sociopath who killed like three people in one movie

i dont rlly understand what i watched. like? did he just knock them out and throw them in the ball pit??or did they die?? everything happened so fast, before i could process what was happening paul blart mall fart was back on his segway and yeeting the hell outta there 

[jeffbezosclinicaldepression]

MESSAGE TO KEVIN FUCKING JAMES

Paul Blart Mall Cop sequel idea: Paul Blart Smart Fart. Paul Blart receives money for saving the mall and with it he develops a new wearable smart device worn in the butthole that can detect a farts smell level before it exits the anus. When it detects a BIG STINKER it goes hog fucking wild and starts beeping and buzzing.

[vaguelyqueerladygrandpa]

My partner just rolled over in bed and says: "Donald Trump looks like if a walking fart and Paul Blart Mall Cop had a baby." And then she rolled back over and fell back asleep.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Michael After Midnight: Nacho Libre

There are quite a few movies out there that, by most accounts are bad… and yet, I can’t really hate them. Films like the original Paul Blart: Mall Cop, films that while not great or masterpieces still hold some level of charm and enjoyment for me. Tonight’s film is one of those films.

Nacho Libre is a pretty weird movie; it’s loosely adapting a true story of a wrestling luchador priest and turning it into a Nickelodeon kid comedy with farts and Jack Black. By all accounts, this film should just be another forgotten relic of the ages at best, or a contender for the worst films of the 2000s at worst. But shockingly enough this movie has quite a bit of charm, and its heart is always in the right place even when its brain isn’t.

Here’s the story: Jack Black is Brother Ignacio, a monk who slaves away cooking for orphans and miserable, ungrateful monks and priests. Ignacio always wanted to be a wrestler, and then one day, he decides to seize this dream. Recruiting the help of a skinny vagrant named Steve, he becomes the masked wrestler Nacho, and Steve becomes Esqueleto. After repeated losses, Ignacio realizes that maybe he’s not fighting for the right thing, and decides to fight to win money for the orphans. Surely God will side with him in the ring and help him take the douchebag celebrity luchadors down a peg, right?

So the story is pretty simple and novel yet quite, nothing too hard to follow yet still pretty weird; the fact that it’s very, very loosely based on the story of Fray Tormenta only serves to make it more strange, as Tormenta’s story could surely have been given a straight adaptation. Within this simple story, there are plenty of farts, cow poop, and Jack Black being a wide-eyed dope with a good heart. For the most part, there’s nothing too bad for kids, but there’s a point where Black calls another man a douche and there’s some other raunchy bits, including Jack Black writing a song for the lovely Sister Encarnacion about breaking their vows of celibacy. This is a Nickelodeon movie. I appreciate their attempts to try and appeal to a broader audience, but a lot of the humor here is still too juvenile to appeal to most older folks, so it kind of falls flat and probably will make parents uncomfortable to let their children watch this.

And yet… there is no denying that this movie has a lot of heart. Ignacio’s rags-to-riches type of story, where he goes from a bullied monk chef to a luchador hero beloved by the orphans, is pretty heartwarming, even with all the dopey jokes in between. The actual wrestling matches are pretty entertaining too, and you get to watch Jack Black take a bunch of beatings, so if you had to suffer through him in Saving Silverman this is a real treat for you. This movie actually has some surprisingly good character development and action for what it is, and despite the humor being mostly juvenile, occasionally you get a really funny joke or quotable line (“GET THAT CORN OUTTA MY FACE!” is easily my favorite).

Honestly, this movie is much like its main character: It’s unrefined, it lacks finesse, it’s not the greatest in the world and it will never be considered the greatest… but it has a lot of heart, it has a lot of passion, you can tell it’s having fun, and it’s just really hard to hate it when it’s so earnest and eager. This one I’ll give a thumbs up; it may not be amazing, but I’d still say to check it out. It’s dopey fun at best, but there’s nothing wrong with some dopey fun every now and then.

Fun fact: Adam Sandler was apparently offered the lead role in this film, but he turned it down due to finding the premise insulting, as he is a huge fan of wrestling. This right here is proof positive that Adam Sandler making awful film decisions is not a recent thing. Either way it’s probably a good thing; Sandler just doesn’t have the cajones to play NACHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[buzzlightyearhugecock]

paul blart mall fart