#POOR MAN’S HEMSWORTH

[exitpursuedbyasloth]

[this is real]

[powerbottom-thor]

Okay so I might break a lot of hearts by this but☝️

Loki has female fans…

And my boy Thor has both men and women lusting over him👀🤌

[sea-salted-wolverine]

Chris Hemsworth's biceps are a separate actor from Chris Hemsworth and are cast separately from the dude they're attached to.

The actor himself has got the chops and has done a decent job avoiding being typecast, his biceps on the other hand have leaned in. If you see a project with Hemsworth in it and you don't see his biceps, There is room for variety there is room for all sorts of weird nonsense and theater and acting. If you see him cast alongside his biceps you know exactly what kind of character he is going to play. And then there are the movies where his biceps got cast but not the actor himself. So he's just kind of there. because he happens to be attached to Chris Hemsworth's biceps, but hes not really doing anything.

The poor man has to compete for top billing with his own arms.

[mickyschumacher]

𝐆𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐄𝐎𝐔𝐒  .ೃ࿐

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: you were in love with f1's beloved honey badger and you had been for almost year. but why in the world had you instead fallen for his teammate? or in which infidelity has laid it's sticky little hands on you.

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: slight angst, infidelity naturally, falling out of love, steamy makeout sesh, suggestive content, pining, sad boy hours for daniel, lando being kind of a sneaky bastard, age-gap between reader and boys (8 years for dan and 2 years for lan), reader born in australia, set in 2020/2021, false or incorrect marine biology lingo and protocols lol, mention of crossiant horner, poor explanation of f1, mentions of insecurity, proof-read...ish

��𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: daniel ricciardo x marine biologist!female reader, lando norris x marine biologist!female reader

𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓: 4k+

𝐀/𝐍: i felt bad for not posting so here's me digging into my reserves! written when i did more song-based fics!! i wish life wasn't so busy 🤧 i have started a few thingsssssss but it's definitely going to be a while before i post them sorry 😣

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

⋆  •°.  。  .°•  ⋆

You, honestly, were a normal girl. Mundane as mundane gets. Never once had you imagined of cameras, headlines and the need for a PR specialist in your life.

But it's what you had gotten. That's what Daniel Ricciardo came with.

You had met the Australian on pure accident. It was late 2020 and the season had just come an end. Hamilton was a six-times World Champion and Daniel had his last season with Renault. He hadn't got the result he wanted but he was optimistic about his future with McLaren. So eventually, he headed home to Australia for the Christmas holidays.

Now you would like to consider yourself a well-versed Australian. Especially considering you were born there. Robert Irwin was the most beloved Australian for years to come and Margot Robbie and Chris Hemsworth were your Aussie reps in America.

Somehow, however, you had never really got F1 or Formula One. That's not to say you hadn't heard of it. Honestly, for the past few years it was difficult to pass Albert Park in the summer of March without it flashing in front of your eyes. But if someone were to ask you anything about it, you would blink blankly and apologise.

Which is exactly what you did in early December. You were out having lunch with your closest friends at a local cafe, catching up on the year in the fresh yet skin-damaging Aussie sun.

You were in midst conversation when a brunette girl politely interrupted you. "Hi, sorry. This is going to sound really weird. I'm doing this on a bet. But do all three of you know that man over there? In the hat?”

You looked over to her table full of people. It seemed like she was with her family and friends. You and your friends zoned on the man in the hat, a guy who was trying to not make it obvious that he was aware of what was going on.

You scrutinised him carefully and unsurprisingly, you didn’t know him. Surprisingly, you did find that he was attractive. The curly hair, the scruff… you wondered whether he was actually Australian because no men in Australia looked like that.

Your two friends nodded while confirming with one another. “It’s Daniel, right? The driver?” One of them asked.

Your other friend hummed in agreement.

The brunette looked over at you. You blinked at her as your face slowly morphed into an apologetic expression. “I’m sorry. I don’t know.”

The brunette, which you expected to be somewhat sad about it, ended up smiling while your friends’ faces dropped.

“Thank you! Oh my god. You have no idea what you’ve just done!” The brunette laughed loudly, capturing the attention of her table. She pointed at the man in the hat, clutching her stomach. “She doesn’t know who you are, Danny. Take that!”

Similarly to your friends, the male’s face dropped. He looked at you and tilted his head.

When Daniel actually saw you for the first time, he was in shock. Not the type of shock of an Aussie not knowing who he was. But rather the shock of being in the presence as someone as beautiful as you.

Your eyes were tantalising and your apologetic expression was cute.

He waved a hand in dismissal. “It’s okay. I’m just an F1 driver.”

You nodded in slow understanding. Maybe you had in fact seen his posters in Albert Park. Honestly, you couldn’t be sure. Life as a marine biologist was busy and all over the place. Recognising celebrities or athletes was kind of the last thing on your mind.

━━━━━━━━━━━

That day you went home with the expectation of a normal tomorrow. One where you were out at the ocean and exploring the waters you had loved so much.

You wish you could say it came as a shock to see that same curly haired man on the wharf, but given the current temperatures that heavily contrasted your winter, it was reasonable as any other Aussie here.

What you didn’t expect was you passing him to get to your boat and then hearing a voice enter the air. “Hey! Excuse me. Sorry. You’re the girl from yesterday, right?”

You turned to the man, hand over your eyes to protect yourself from the harsh rays and take a closer look at him. Just in case it wasn’t him.

“Uh, yeah? You’re the driver, right?”

Daniel gave a wide smile, extending out his hand. “I’m Daniel. Daniel Ricciardo.”

Oh my. What a smile he had. The type to make you feel happy just by looking at it. You couldn’t even help but smile in response. You reached out to shake his hand, not ready to feel a weird sort of spark between the two of you.

“I... I’m Y/N. Nice to meet you.”

Daniel slowly removed his hand from yours, grabbing any last second he could. He eyed the briefcase and scuba gear in your hands. “You diving?”

You looked at your equipment. “Well, testing. I’m a marine biologist. Although, I guess I’m still diving.”

Daniel pursed his lips. Now he had to get to know you. You were beautiful and a marine biologist. An Aussie dream.

“Oh yeah? What are you testing?” He queried with a raised brow,

“Oh! Uh, currently things like the local fish populations in decline. Their habitat. Whether they’re safe or not. Algae growth. Predators. pH levels. All the fun stuff...” You sheepishly trailed off once you realised you began rambling.

You didn’t know but in that moment Daniel was in awe of you. The twinkle in your eyes that rose once you talked about your work. Like your work was your passion. That’s how he felt about F1.

You watched Daniel nod as if he were actually interested. “Do you mind if I come with? I won’t contaminate anything. Promise.”

You mended your brows together. It wasn’t uncommon for people to ask to join. But the way Daniel said it… like it was something he had to do or he would regret it for the rest of his life, you couldn’t help feel compelled. “Um, yeah. Do you not have to be on the road or something though? ‘Cause your a driver?”

“Oh F1 only goes between March and November. We’re on holiday at the moment. Well sort of.”

“Oh,” you mumbled out cluelessly. Your cheeks burned with a tinge of embarrassment. How had you managed to get through all these years of living and not known about this?

Daniel laughed lightly at the reddening of your cheeks. Just when he though he could find you any cuter. “Don’t worry. I’ll teach you F1. And you can teach me the ocean.”

So the two of you went into your boat. The sun beat down onto you so harshly that for most of it, you had retreated to driving the vessel in the shade as Daniel sat next to you.

It had gone so well that this, whatever it was, became a regular occurrence after you exchanged numbers that day.

You were learning a lot about him and his job. He was actually Italian-Australian. He started this passion with go-karting. You found out F1 wasn’t just racing but it was racing to another extreme. 300 kph. God, getting your car to 100 kph for the open road was thrill enough for you.

That made Daniel wheeze with laughter and promise he would take you for a drive in a sports car to get a taste of the speed he craved for.

Apparently F1 had 10 teams, each with 2 drivers. In each of the teams, the drivers had the same car to drive, cars that were constructed originally by each team. The point of the races were for two championships. The Driver’s World Championship, the title the driver wanted to win, and the Constructors’ Championship, the title everyone from the driver to the team strategist wanted to win. They were calculated by the amount of points received by the drivers in the races.

All the races were settled through a long weekend of sorts. Fridays were for practices to see how the car was on the track as they had different conditions per track. Saturdays were for qualifying. Here, Daniel would push the car to its limits to get the fastest lap time as the drivers were ranked to then get a position for the actual race tomorrow. Sundays were where they raced for points.

All of it was slightly complex, especially with the penalties and rules that they followed. Buy you seemed to get the gist of it.

Daniel had learnt that you had grown up in Australia and like him had to travel a lot for your work. Weirdly, some times his race dates would match up with your travelling. Daniel chose to take that as a sign. You were 8 years younger than him, taking him by a slight surprise. You were 23 and he was 31. But it didn’t seem like it mattered to you. Communication between the two of you was a smooth sail.

Daniel even opened up about his time with Red Bull. A whirl of bad and annoying memories. But when you had said that you would like to see Christian Horner step on to your boat and throw him overboard into a tank of piranhas, only for thirty seconds of course, Daniel had never laughed harder.

━━━━━━━━━━━

By the billionth time you had hung out, the sun was setting in the evening, providing a refreshing cold breeze to match the heat. Christmas was close soon. And Daniel was aching to ask you out.

He had to go into this next season of driving knowing he had you by his side. Even his own family was pushing him to ask. Especially his sister, Michelle, who had dubbed herself the cupid as she was the very brunette who had technically introduced you two, or so she claimed.

The both of you had finished a dive and were heading to Daniel's car. You were supposed to have dinner with his family on this fine evening.

"You good, Danny?" You looked over to the man. Daniel, for the loud and outgoing person he was, was being rather quiet today. You couldn't really put your finger on why either. You took pride in being able to read people. But it looked like his mind was at some sort of battle.

He gave an idle hum, getting into the driver's seat.

You raised a brow, closing the door on the passenger side shut. Your hand reached out to his thigh, making him break his trance and flicker his eyes towards you.

"Listen, I don't know what it is or what's going on. But I'm all ears if you want," You smiled, patting his thigh. You went to remove your hand but Daniel placed his hand over yours, keeping you there.

Daniel's heart was in his throat. He was not normally a nervous man. He was the epitome of confidence. But you seemed to tear that down, in the nicest way, quite easily.

Daniel absorbed your curious eyes before releasing a shaky breath. "Uh," he awkwardly chuckled, scratching the back of his head. "I'm not normally like this. I can't really explain it... but these past few weeks, I... I haven't felt like this in a really long time. With you I feel free... happy... I guess what I'm trying to say is that I really like you. And even if I'm ancient, I would really like to be with you. You know. Together. If that wasn't clear."

The smile on your face the moment you realised what was going on hadn't stopped growing. You watches his eyes dart around, looking for a signal of anything. A yes. A no.

You looked down at your hands. The warmth of his spread among your one. You turned your hand to intertwine them with his and squeezed his hand, looking back up at him. "I think you took the words right out my mouth. I like you too, Danny. A lot. Even as an 'old ass man.'"

An odd silence settled within the car as Daniel simply stared at you, honey brown eyes hold your own.

"Danny? Are you okay?"

Daniel's eyes turned into crescents while his infamous wide smile sprawled onto your face. "Can I kiss you?"

You stilled in the passenger seat. Your eyes flickered to his lips before meeting his eyes once again. You weren't sure if you could trust your voice at the moment so you gave a curt nod.

Daniel smiled softly at the flustered expression you sported. Instead of leaning his head in like you expected to, he reached over to your seat and lifted you out of it. You released a small yelp before landing onto his lap, straddling his crotch as you faced towards him.

Daniel's fingers played with the slightly dampened tresses that had fallen around your face and pushed them behind your ears. His fingers trailed down to your heated cheeks and to your jaw. Bringing you closer to him, he leaned his head towards you.

Daniel's lips fell into yours. His hands soon fell to your back as your arms snaked his neck. The world... your surroundings were all gone. All you could feel was each other. His fingers sneaking past the hem of your shirt and grazing your bare skin. The action sent a wave of heat within you.

You let out a small muffled moan causing Daniel to adjust himself in his seat. A bulge had formed in his pants, aching at your touch. You released yourself from him for a gasp of air, which fell into further pleasurable gasps as Daniel's swollen lips had found your neck, leaving a trail of small sloppy kisses.

Daniel rested his chin onto your shoulder before pulling back to look at you. He grinned at your dazed expression. "As much as I would like to continue this in such a fitting setting like a car, I would rather our first time in an actual bed."

You let out a small laugh, feeling yourself fluster even further while you gave him a tight hug.

And that's how your relationship had started. Since then, it had been almost a year. In that year, you had gotten impossibly closer. You had visited his races without telling him because you were scared. You were scared of distracting him and scared for him. The first F1 race you went to matched up to your meetings with other marine biologists and techs in Spain. God, you didn't know cars could even go that fast. The occasional toss of a car to the side sent fear coursing through you.

Eventually, Daniel had found out and reassured you that you being there wouldn't harm anything. In fact, the thought of it calmed him down and encouraged him. He had even introduced you to some of the team and whispered in your ear when he pointed to Red Bull's team principal.

"Oh... so that's the man going overboard. That's a shame. You didn't tell me he look like a sea otter. Sea otters are supposed look cute. I'll just pretend he's plant plankton."

Daniel had never laughed harder at something. Just when he thought he couldn't love you more. God, you were a sight to behold. He would never understand how you managed to be who you were.

You had felt the same.

Well, at least that was until when you met his new teammate in McLaren, Lando Norris.

Lando was two years younger than you and what some people called the British Ricciardo. He was constantly smiling and cracking jokes. He was the moodmaker.

The vibe he had was like an annoying little brother of a sort.

But people obviously didn't feel attracted to someone if they truly thought of them like that.

You shouldn't feel this way. It was wrong. You had a boyfriend. A boyfriend who adored you. You had tried to keep yourself occupied with your job to avoid having to attend too many races and meet the McLaren team, in fear of meeting Lando.

But of course, how were you going to refuse to celebrate Lando's 2nd podium of the year in Monaco when Daniel asked?

So here you were. In a club dressed in a cream coloured set: a long sleeved bralette and a long skirt starting from your waist, ending just before your heels with a slit in the middle.

The compliment you had received in your ear from Daniel made you wish you could say you were dressed for him in the first place. But it would be a lie to say that.

You had navigated yourself around the club to drown yourself in some alcohol. You needed a distraction and you felt that being some what drunk and out of it would've helped.

you should take it as a compliment that i got drunk and made fun of the way you talk. you should think about the consequence of your magnetic field being a little too strong. and i got a boyfriend, he's older than us he's in the club doing, i don't know what you're so cool, it makes me hate you so much.

You were out of it for sure. Because sober you did not have the guts you had right now. The guts to not only sit at the same table as Lando but next to him and make fun of his British accent with Carlos.

"No, Carlos. I'm pretty sure he sounded like 'No no no... you ruined my ice cream,'" You laughed lightly as the Spaniard refused to agree with you.

"No he has bit of a weird sound at the 'ruined' part. He sound like those kids in the UK... on the road? What are they again..."

Lando's face burst with amusement. He laughed so hard, he had to prevent his cup from falling out of his hand. "Do you mean..." He gasped for air, "Roadmen?"

Jesus. Carlos Sainz discussing roadmen was the funniest thing that had happened so far.

You weren't sure where Daniel was even. All you knew he was probably talking to some other team member of McLaren. You were rather preoccupied and entranced by the British male next to you.

You couldn't explain it but it was as if there was a magnetic field around him and you, like an element, were simply attracted to him. As if there was no other path to go. He made you laugh differently. Feel differently. He was also a looker. That boyish charm that simply pulled you in. It made you wonder how strong his magnetic field was.

The science of it was simple. You may be a marine biologist but you hadn't flunked physics. The stronger the intensity of a field, the further the magnet, Lando, will be able to attract elements, like you. All you knew was that he was strong enough to inexplicably take you attention away from your own boyfriend.

you're so gorgeous i can't say anything to your face 'cause look at your face. and i'm so furious at you for making me feel this way but what can i say? you're gorgeous.

This attraction you felt to Lando what ridiculous in itself. But you had felt it from when you first met him and you felt it now. Lando was simply gorgeous. His smile was breathtaking. His laugh felt pretty.

And it infuriated you. You wanted to yell at him, tell him to stop. These feelings, this flutter, this tingle... make it all stop, you wanted to say.

But you could never say that to his face. How could you? Those same things came back every time you looked at him.

The smile. The flutter. The tingle.

You wondered whether he had even looked at himself in the mirror. You wondered whether ever had felt insecure about the way he looked and that if he did, you wished he hadn't.

Everything thing about him was simply enticing. A delightful view... from the arms of Daniel.

you should take it as a compliment that i'm talking to everyone here but you. and you should think about the consequence of you touching my hand in a darkened room. if you've got a girlfriend, i'm jealous of her. but if you're single that's honestly worse. 'cause you're so gorgeous it actually hurts.

This feeling... this infatuation was overwhelming for you. You were a taken girl. You had even made it was to the multiple Instagram F1 'WAGs' accounts and were met with the most glorious welcomes by fans.

You needed to get a grip on yourself for Christ's sake. Lando was also taken. Even if he was single, which if you were being honest was an insult to romance itself, you didn't have a chance let alone now. No matter how jealous you were, you had to be realistic. You paled in comparison to the fame Portuguese models that F1 drivers often found themselves with.

Of course, you had to admit they were beautiful. You had no conflict with them. They weren't your classic mean girls. They were impossibly nice and you even found yourself in some interesting conversations. But at the end of the day, you were simply a marine biologist.

So in the darkness of the club, you had managed to isolate yourself from Lando, who had gone with Pierre somewhere, and made the struggling and gruelling effort to talk to anyone else but him. You had conversed with Carlos before he had gone somewhere with his girlfriend. You had settle for Charles as a distraction.

Charles was a pleasure to talk to. As always, he was also so kind and sweet with his words. The type you were sure that when you looked at the, you knew that their mother raised them right.

Daniel had finally found his way to you, mentioning that Zak Brown had just pulled him aside for a talking to. You asked if he was okay, in which he responded with a smile and said: "Now that I'm with you, yes."

You managed to give him a soft and believable smile. Daniel was standing behind you, joining in your conversation with Charles. It wasn't until you were in the midst of a conversation about life in Monaco that you felt a hand on yours.

You smiled gently, expecting it to be Daniel's but instead it was Lando's.

ocean blue eyes looking in mine. i feel like i might sink and drown and die.

Your eyes snapped up to meet Lando's face. His blue eyes bore into yours.

Those goddamn eyes of his would be the end of you. The similarity of them to the oceans you had travelled and the beautiful creatures you had seen was uncanny.

Your heart paced furiously against your chest. He must've been drunk or tipsy to the very least to stumble onto you. There was no way he had purposely wanted you to drown in his eyes.

You sucked in a quiet sharp breath and edged to removed your hand. But as quickly as you had made that decision, the gnawing feeling at your heart had grown more intense and taunted you. Lando's hand hurried to grab yours and place it back where it was.

Your eyes shook with awe and lingered with a dangerous thrill. You could feel his fingers rub the back of your hand gently before intertwining them.

You looked blankly at the table in front of you while Lando had joined in the conversation so casually, like nothing was even going on. You had to thank your stars that the club was able to be as dark as it was.

A lot of the noise around you had turned into white noise and blurs of sound. Charles must've complimented you as you had managed to capture some mention of fish and coral reefs from your boyfriend.

you make me so happy it turns back to sad. there's nothing i hate more than what i can't have and you are so gorgeous, it makes me so mad. you make me so happy it turns back to sad. there's nothing i hate more than what i can't have and guess i'll just stumble on home to my cats alone unless, you wanna come along?

It was Daniel kissing your cheek fondly and Lando's hand grazing your knee under the table that had brought you back to reality.

The happiness and adrenaline you felt was wrong. You knew with every crevice and fibre of your body that this had to stop. This attraction and sickly sweet infatuation with Lando. God, he just made you so fuzzy. You could barely think straight.

You were stuck in between two men who had their touch on you. It wasn't right. As much as you liked Lando, he angered your entire being. He had simply waltzed into your life. He was playing along with your feelings.

Lando's damning eyes averted to you when he felt your hand slip away from him forcefully.

You hoped the guilt in your eyes shone as much as they could in this darkness.

You were going to have to break up with a man who would give you everything. You would have to leave all of... this... and get away from here.

You needed everything to return to normal. You had no idea how exactly you were going to explain a sudden return home without inflicting any suspicion.

All you knew now was that you had to make a lengthy apology to a man you had not realised you had fallen out of love with.

You supposed that was love.

Love was a bittersweet feeling. It was beautiful and fluttering but brought a lot of tragedy and strife along with it.

That was love: simply gorgeous.

© 𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐘𝐒𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐌𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐑

[siremasterlawrence]

Becoming A Champion: The Hemsworth Brothers

Chris Hemsworth regrets on how he got here it was on the crazy night of October 31st yes on the day of good ole hallow eves at a fan event in Los Angeles and he is relaxing all while he us hanging out with his brothers at the time all giggles, smiles ear to ear with huge grins as knock on the door erupting in to a bit of annoyance. He rises to his feet slamming his hand on the desk as he waltzes past his clan to the door at exactly midnight grabbing the door knob and as the slides open a odd young man waltzes in to the room in a ecstatic fit state of mind as the man claps his back causing Chris took look confused beyond his understanding. Suddenly the lights flicker off leaving them literally in the dark as they freak off racing through the room as they panic trying to force the windows as they shutter down sealing off and they loose as they walls are covered in a steel wall enclosing them the floor begins to shake descending one level to another the speed picks up at the beat. The floor comes to a stop in a room two size too small as the three of them barely fit in to with three doors magically appears their backs are turned from them as they are now obviously oblivious to everything and they hear a sound erupting around them unfortunately something goes off as they door swings to the side and threeother guys reach out placing liquid lacedrags on his mouth cupping their face anddrag them in. Chris woke up laying in the middle of the Arctic kingdom as his bodyshivers at the sheer touch of cold shoots in to his body and he learns to adjust he is standing up to oversee the place he isnow stranded in.

“Liam? Luke? Are you there?”

“They are perfectly safe Chris”

“Where are they?”

“Never you mind that “

“What can you possibly want from me?”

“Zip it! Your new master @MCTF21 is awaiting you.”

“Who the….”

“You will compete at this level like a major athlete Olympian.”

“Yes to please Master…Master @MCTF21”

“Climb the cold winter mountain height to prove to him.”

“I shall prove to him”

“Follow him to the heights “

“You are a Olympian”

“I am a Olympian “

“I am born to serve him”

“I will prove it by back flipping to the next cold mountain.”

“Fuck off and do it”

“Yes Sir”

Liam Hemsworth is next on the dock now he is locked away in a room looking so similar to his current dressing room and the last trailer as he feels an urge to lift his weights upward. He is utterly amazed no surprised and shock at how immaculate all things were designed to be his place with so much great detail to it and he is smirking in great delight of it all’s as he wondering what is coming up next.The world begins spinning out of control for him as he feels exhausted as he falls to the ground flailing on the floor as he is rolling to his safety as the place is on fire and he is consumed.A man walks in to the room as he steps up the staircase to the top of the room as he is standing upward as he felt deeply in control of the situation as he smiles wickedly and cups his chin. Poor Liam his head is lifting upward as he is staring at me deeply, intensely as I his new Lord, God, King, Master Lawrence to whom he owes him everything now and his lips are soft and tender to the touch. We are finally giving him to my desire as he lips pin down on mine we slowly begin to make out with all our efforts because he falls for me mind, body and soul. Its a beautiful sight as he is meeting me surpassing my height as he is standing up, my arms wrap around me as holds me closer and he can’t see his body swooping him in to my world. It is my entire existence as he lifts me up staring in to my eyes his whole world flips spiritually out of control and Liam Hemsworth is no more of man just a pussy my pussy. Liammy new puss can’t help but be so blindly happy and totally obedient to me, the sound of my finger rushes through it all as he is awoken to me over him.

“Ugh! What the fuck ?”

“Oh Master Lawrence!”

“Yes Liam”

“I am your property “

“Your brothers?”

“Fuck them!”

“Wow! You mean it?”

“Well not literally “

“Mwahahahahaha…”

“Please don’t laugh”

“Why boi?”

“I love you “

“You do! I am aware”

“Chris can’t have you “

“I won’t leave you for him”

“Besides Chris is taken”

“What about Luke?”

“I might give him away”

Luke is up next but I am about to send him to a secret person.

1

2

3

The end

[mydysfunctionalvampirefamily]

Surprise bitches!!!! You thought you'd gotten rid of me, but we still have one shots to do!!

Christian Edge, a vampire for 400 years? I guess Edge is a fake last name then because I really don't think that is a 1600 surname.

Shelley Hemsworth, she wasn't even allowed her to say her first sentence before laughing so hard??

So Shelley just is here because she's pretending to be interested in her boyfriend's interest? I can respect the effort she's going for for this Cliff? I hope he's worth it.

Oh wow this Cliff is actually in the show lol.

Tim saying in as many ways as he can: CLIFF IS NORMAL!!

Cimanthe Pratt: I love her, but I just have such a hard time following what she's saying.

Okay but "squash hunting is very lonely" would be an amazing tag line for either a paranormal dating show or a competitive squash carving dating show.

Linus Szandor Foley. Sexier ideas than the satanic church? Bold statement.

This is going to be a site chaos.

"That's like a math!" 😂

"then don't be a snitch" if I got a nickel for every time a vampire om this pod talked about not snitching I'd have 2 nickels.. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice.

Just the normal guy freaking out and running out of the room, and the weirdos are all like hey dude, chill.

3 sky lights? What is this, a sims house???

The power of a happy trail, man.

Workplace hootinanny? 😂😂😂😂

Wait cliff and shelley are exes??? How did I miss the break up?

Rubber toes imply that you go bare feet in winter.

They all run??? 😂 Cliff was so close too!

"vials of release?" 😬

One of the release vials shatters? So everyone else just ran to not get sprayed with cum and not because of some ghost. That makes sense.

"I had no idea you were so potent." excuse me, sir!

Poor Cliff! He is such a scaredy cat! He set out to be the calm and reasonable one, but he became the Shaggy.

No reality show is complete without a surprise father reveal.

Wait the Wilsons are the villains now?

At least Cliff is going to get some more customers from all of this.

[gaypirateslife4me]

Gonna send this as a regular message. Little too big just for the comments. 😅 Let me ask a question that I do hope will ease that 5% of your mind.

Who is more likely to blame in such a situation? Is it the big Hollywood studio run by filthy rich white guys of the type known for making life hell for anyone who goes against them, especially women, queer people, and POC? Or is it the brown guy worth barely anything* in comparison whose sets are fun and happy, who many people are eager to work with repeatedly (which is one of the best metrics in the industry to see if someone's really a good egg), and who is most well known for getting more POC and now queer rep into the industry?

I really wanna put that same question to all those sites using Taika's name for yet more clickbait drama, but I doubt they'd care. It's more fun to blame the brown guy they've all decided to hate than the powerful studio executives...who just might own their website, now I think of it...👀 Well, there's a good reason articles from outside the US entertainment industry, like the New Zealand article I linked, aren't doing that. I'm amazed I only just now remembered that the studios own most of the magazines and websites who print that stuff. Suddenly many things make a lot more sense...

There's six named executive producers and six different production companies for this thing, not counting AppleTV. No idea how many directors, but Taika only did a couple episodes. Multiple writers too, including Jemaine who is also a co-creator. So why is it only being called "Taika Waititi's Time Bandits" or his set in most of these articles? Talk about sus...

Sorry, I got off track there. 😆 Anyway. What I'm trying to say is a bit of skepticism is always healthy. That should go without saying and go both directions too, not to deny the actor their experiences. But if something looks, walks, and quacks like an ignore-and-shush-the-queer-POC duck, then it's more likely to be the big Hollywood studio with $8.7billion to throw around and a history of doing just that than any of the smaller companies involved. It's far more likely than the one POC indie producer/writer/director attached to the project, who has a great reputation in the industry that stretches back years and who also just so happened to be neck deep in filming a whole other project at the time.

*I had no idea Taika's net worth was only $13million until just now. That man is downright poor in Hollywood terms! He's worth the same as Jensen Ackles! Chris Hemsworth is worth ten times that! I can now laugh heartily at anyone who claims the $30million-to-her-name (which is just about middle class in Hollywood) Rita married him just for his money!

Sorry to ramble like that in your inbox! 😅

Please NEVER apologize for making me laugh so hard over the image of Rita's portion of their prenupt being written on a cocktail napkin in crayon and saying "don't be a dumbass, I economically own three of you".

[bookofkatherine]

Distracted by an Angel: Chris Hemsworth Kicks Silver Surfer to the Curb

Thursday August 22, 2024 5:55 p.m.

Dear Journal,

Fucking Chris Hemsworth, man. It's like he knew - he KNEW - I had just logged onto Tumblr and was about to write a post about Chris Evans and maybe even John Krasinski.

And he couldn't have that now, could he? Oh no. Ohhh NO! (He's one of the more competitive angels among my Knights.) So! He sent me this photo instead. He knew what it would do. He knew I hadn't seen it before. He knew I'd be totally and utterly distracted. That was the goal.

And it worked.

Now what am I supposed to do!?!?!

Gone are my plans to write about killing the Silver Surfer this morning... down the drain. Whoosh!

Gone are my plans to write about another angel among us, Ryan Gosling, and how Denzel Washington's role in the Equalizer movies are all based on real-life adventures Ryan has actually lived.

Gone are all the poems I planned to write, share and read. Gone are all the news stories, the love stories and the ideas I had in my head to share here, there and everywhere - gone, gone, gone!!!

Even poor Tom Hiddleston, trapped on the Otherside, who was finally allowed to reconnect with me today, taking me past the brink of ecstasy for the first time in what feels like eternity - no posts about him. No thoughts about him. No laying back in bed to remember where he put his fingers and lips...

No. Not even Tom's recommendations for our next rendevous helped.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

As much as I should be thinking about wrapping a black silk tie around my wrist and wearing nothing but lingerie with the black-bow heels Tom sent me... Nope!

I'm just thinking about Thor's hands.

Or should I say... hand.

Because - Mr. Thor knows exactly what he can do with his right hand. And he knows that I know how talented he is with that hand too.

Dammit.

And I know, I know.

Why isn't Chris Hemsworth sending me photos from the hotel room he's in right now?

Well.... that would break protocol. I don't even send him original photos. None of us in The Order do. It's too risky.

Instead we have various handles, accounts and pseudonyms all over the internet to share our lives with each other without compromising our locations or our safety. We are in the most dangerous battle, after all, the Final War. It's much easier to send each other media from before, when the Last Battle hadn't begun yet.

For example, Tom Hiddleston is on the Otherside. The dead don't have smart phones. Cameras are most definitely not allowed.

The best he can do is make me small Loki's in the clouds when I go out for a drive. Before he was sent to the Otherside, when he was here, he'd make giant Loki clouds with enormous horns, horns that were bigger than my house.

But now he has to settle for itty bitty horns atop a tiny Loki cloud. I don't mind. I'd rather see him in the clouds than lose him altogether.

Cap (Chris Evans) is on my lawn helping to train the Knights for war. No one thinks to take a photo while training in the arena. If they did, Merlin the Wizard would probably appear out of thin air and confiscate the phone.

And Chris Hemsworth? Thor himself!?

Well... he's in a hotel room with the final prophet who just arrived a couple of weeks ago. Oh, they aren't alone. The prophet's son is there, and Chris, Merlin, Dumbledore, Kyle, Jordan and even my husband Nick aare all there to save the son's life.

Why is the prophet's son in danger of dying? Well, you can thank Chris Hemworth for that - and Tom Hiddleston. Those two tinker with fucking magic like they really are gods instead of fucking angels.

You know what? Don't get me started. I'm pretty upset about the whole thing. I was supposed to marry that prophet over a decade ago, before Nick. And those two angels - Tom/Loki and Chris/Thos - got so jealous that they cast spells on us to break us up.

And not once... those two did it TWICE!!!

Aaaaarrrrggghhh!!!

"I love ya, babe," Chris Hemsworth just said. Yeah. Yeah. He knows I'm in love with him. I can't help it. So he's just giving me a wink and a smile.

You know why?

Because he sent me THESE!!!

I didn't even know he could ride!!!! Did you!?!? Holy fucking Christ!!!! This is totally unfair!!!

And he knows I go weak in the knees for this smile, especially when he's with adorable animals.

I still remember why, though:

Alexander Skarsgard and the lamb. Remember that photo??? And all the others like it? (Oh. Right. You might be new. Alex was the first angel I ever fell in love with. That was back in 2014. I didn't meet Chris Hemsworth until December 2023 - but he had been guarding me since I was born. So he got pretty jealous of Alex when the Lord allowed him into my life long, long, long before Chris Hemsworth.)

Anyhow - a bunch of the angels began taking photos like this after Alex took these for me while away.

Yeah. Adorable right?

How no one figured out that Alexander Skarsgard was a literal angel walking among us before now, I'll never know. The signs were all that. That man... well. I guess that's another post.

*happy sigh*

Anyhow!!!

Chris Hemsworth sent me this too. And goddammit - I just can't resist. My brain is full of him now, and the result?

The result is as folllows:

-I didn't spend time with anyone in the Dreamworld

-I didn't write the poem Original Sin for Cap (Chris Evans) like I planned too

-I didn't stretch my new muscles out after a vigorous lovemaking session with John, Tom and the Knights, when my muscles were nice and warm

-I didn't get healing (many of the Knights can heal me through the Dreamworld)

-I didn't write about anyone else except for Chris Hemsworth/Thor again, when I haven't written about anyone else on here yet!!!

Oh, dear journal.

I fucking killed the Silver Surfer at 6:00 a.m. in the morning today. And it's not even on my mind.

My boy had got me all caught up.

I suppose, in the end, it's a good problem to have.

I mean.... would you LOOK at him??? He just sent this at lunch. It's as if he was saying, "I'm gonna drive you nuts later today - and you know what? You're going to love me anyway, babe."

And you know what?

He was right.

Note: I call Chris Hemsworth by both of his names: Thor and Chris. I call him Thor at times because he does indeed have most of the powers attributed to Thor Odinson.

I'll write about this more in the future, but the angels of Earth were often called gods by various cultures. Angels are immortal. They don't die. They are sent to either heaven or the Pit, a prison for the Fallen.

Anyhow, Chris Hemsworth is an angel. He can walk among us, just like the angels did when they visited Enoch, Daniel, Mary, Joseph and John the Apostle. Angels even visited Sodom and Gemorrah. And at all times, these angels are described as tall, bronze, buff and hot as hell.

Sounds like Chris Hemsworth to me.

I mean, he can fly.

The man has wings. Hell, I have wings! A lot of people in The Order do.

But my point is, Chris Hemsworth is not just an angel, he is one of the most powerful angels ever created. Around the world he was called various names, including Thor and even Alexander the Great.

But the majority of his adventures have been told in the movies under the name Thor. I mean, he is Tom Hiddleston's brother. (And yes, Tom Hiddleston is also pretty fucking powerful. He has Loki's powers, as one of the twelve Olympians - though in Rome he was called Hephaestus.)

Thank you for reading!!! I love you guys!!! I post @ prophetsjournal on Twitter the most often. It's just easier. But I'm glad I joined the Tumblr community. There's so much freedom here, and the readers are just fantastic.

Love you!!! Have an AMAZING day!

(And, by the way, you should really read my stuff while you're on your way to the New Earth. Like Noah Ark, the Lord's provided a way out of this apocalypse/climate change. Take it! I'm only here to fight Satan back so you can go ahead to safety without interruption. Please do!!! Before the pearly gate portals close. xoxo, K)

[sonofahero]

«—◦—�� Kit Connor, Bisexual, Cismale & He/Him, Fighter«—◦—→ Well met, Evander Althea! The godling born child of Heracles. It’s been 21 years and now he has answered the song in their veins. Can he change the course of history with his positivity, lovingness, & strong-wiliness or will his nativity, air-headedness, cockiness hinder him? Only time will tell before this godling’s name is sung into myth and legend!

🏺 ︰ 𝐁𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐬

Name: Evander Althea Nicknames: Evan or Vander Date of Birth: May 4th, 2003 Place of Birth: ‎Greeley, Colorado Age: Twenty-One Gender: Cismale Sexuality: Bisexual Divine Parent: Heracles. God of Strength and Heroes. Mother: Melody Althea Companions: Melody Althea ( Nemean Lioness Cub ) Education: Some College ( Major: Undecided ) Occupation: College Student

🏺 ︰ 𝐏𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥

Hair Color: Ginger Eye Color: Brown with hints of gold Height: 6'1" Build: Athletic Dominant Hand: Right Tattoos: None Scars: None Notable Features: Pale skin with constant blushed cheeks and nose, splattered with orange-brown freckles that litter his cheeks, shoulders and chest. A small tuff of ginger chest hair in the center of his pecs. Brown eyelashes. Fashion Style: Sportswear usually. tank-tops, t-shirts or long sleeved shirts pair with mainly shorts or joggers. At home, he goes for a cardigan, some lounge pants and a baggier t-shirt which he tucks in and let's hang over the sides of his pants.

🏺 ︰ 𝐏𝐬𝐲𝐜𝐡𝐞

MBTI: ENFP - The Campaigner Enneagram:   7 - The Enthusiast Moral Alignment: Neutral Good. Astrological Sign: Taurus Habits: When Evan isn't working out at the gym ( which he does everyday ) or when he wasn't at school, Evan was at home with his mother, a total mama's boy. He is full of energy and is always on the move, going on hikes, rock climbing, swimming. Quirks: He loves physical affection, hugs, cuddling. He does believe in bad luck and tends to avoid things that would give him bad luck ( Black Cats, Ladders, Splitting the path when walking with friends.) Pet Peeves: Poor treatment of anyone ( animals or humans ) and littering. Hobbies: Working Out, Hiking, Swimming, Rock Climbing, Video Games ( Fighting and Hack-and-Slash ), Music. Personality: Evan is a golden retriever in human form. He is extremely friendly and empathetic to others. He is strong-willed, loving, and very positive but is also not the smartest in general, he is easily tricked into believing things, doesn't pick up on social cues from time to time and is a little vain when it comes to his looks and physical appearance. He loves love and loves people, so loves being around them and isn't the biggest fan of spending time alone, except for when he's working out and in the zone.

🏺 ︰ 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬

Disney's Hercules. Johnny Bravo. A literal golden retriever. Chris Hemsworth's Thor. Kronk from An Emperor's New Groove.

🏺 ︰ 𝐋𝐨𝐫𝐞

TW: Some financial instability Evander Althea grew up the only child to a single mother in San Francisco, California. Evan didn't let the lack of a father figure get to him, he loves his mother with all his heart and is fiercely protective of her when it comes to men she dates and people who treat her poorly. He grew up fast, being the 'man of the household', he took that to heart as a kid and did all the chores around the house, taking care of the home as his mother worked for their only source of income. Evan got into working out in high school, taking up a job at a fitness center, spending everyday there with his friends, he loved it. It wasn't long before he was off to college, leaving his mother for the first time ever. The distance from his only family was tough, but Evan is quick to making friends and found his own posse of people in college. One late night as Evan, who may or may not have been drunk, was walking back from a sorority party to his frat house, was accosted by a mugger. Evan was going to comply but the other didn't leave him alone even after giving him all the cash he had. What Evan meant as a small push to get the man away from him since the mugger flying, crashing into the grass a ways away. Evan ran home, it was clear that it wasn't his own physical strength that made the man sore through the sky but something deep within him, crawling to get out. He was contacted shortly after that night about Camp Godlings and his mother confirmed it, his father was Heracles, did that make Evan a Disney's prince? He had so many questions, and with honestly no real direction in his life in college, he decided to drop out and moved to Camp Godling, he could feel this was his destiny.

[thattimdrakeguy]

Dionysus is an incredibly beautiful god, he took his current image of a sloppy drunkard in revenge for the punishment for Zeus.

[partially quoting Apollo, he is like a child who shows mom and dad that he does not want and will not brush his teeth even if they rot].

I always imagined him as a tall and slim young man extraordinary beauty with honey-colored hair and violet eyes.

And only now I realized that for some reason I always thought Bernard also had light honey hair and violet eyes, he was also a tall and slender pretty boy.

how deep has my headcanon sunk into my brain?

son of Dionysus!Bernard, during his sacrifice, was very ironic and thought that his divine father would hardly appreciate such a sacrifice. But at least these poor cultists will get their god's attention and madness from him.

I feel sort of dumb because I actually knew that. Not from memory, but from looking it up on wikipedia, 'cause I couldn't remember who was who since it's been so long. but got caught up trying to amuse myself too much, and blocked it out anyways even the perfect aren't always the perfect. (little known fact, my high school nickname was 'the perfect')

that is a very good point though

in my head i don't really imagine a twink though. i imagine like Gerald Butler in the 300 mixed with Chris Hemsworth or something like that

some guy that could manhandle you, but in a soft romantic way. however could also be some Freudian slip-esque reveal out of me about my taste in men

yet, yet, yet, in my defense since Dionysus doesn't seem to have a for certain appearance I think ol' Ricky intended for people to imagine whatever their tastes would be

i'm also not sure if bernard would do a sacrifice, 'cause in his original comics he was kind of a pussy if i remember right

though in the world of your creation, that doesn't have to mean shit. go all for it

after all pussies are after all a very resilient organ after all in reality after all

that's the thing about fan AUs, after a while you give things such a soul when you create this magnificently creative thing, you might as well keep breathing life into it

despite me saying "i don't knooow, man, i don't knooow" about it, you do have me genuinely curious to hear out this sacrifice thing.

love people's creative potential. i adore it and don't get to witness it personally too much. so if you wouldn't mind, lay it on me

your pseudo-pitch at the end there has me sold

[kenobster]

@lifeinwisco tagged me to list my top seven comfort movies, thank you! :) I'm leaving Star Wars stuff off this list because we all know what we're about here lol.

Note that (1) I took the term "comfort movies" seriously lol... my list of favorite movies would be different; (2) my "comfort movies" are not your "comfort movies" aka viewer beware because I am very strange.

Interstellar in which wormholes, space travel, and climate change are depicted through the most brilliant emotions, soundtrack, and visuals, the latter of which via consultation from actual RL physicists--but also in which rational science is stumped by the human being's unquantifiable capacity for love, a variable transcending the laws of space & time

What About Bob in which one absolutely deranged patient and one absolutely deranged psychiatrist are set upon two absolutely deranged, diametrically opposed, and escalating paths. This will infuriate the patient, this will infuriate the psychiatrist, this will infuriate you, this will infuriate me—but somehow you and I will still be laughing into the stratosphere for ages.

World War Z in which Brad Pitt decides to plagiarize and displace the words of a popular epistolary novel investigates a zombie apocalypse ex-Navy-Seal style (and FYI, in this one, those bitches RUN)

Bad Times at the El Royale in which I go in for shirtless Chris Hemsworth portraying a cult leader, realize halfway through that I'm actually here for Cynthia Erivo's singing (and briefly yearn to punch Chris Hemsworth in the fucking face for his unnervingly convincing performance as a villain), find myself uncomfortably aroused in a very crowded theater what with all that unexpected fictional dubcon, and leave sobbing harder than I ever have in my life because an old man pretended to be a priest one last time (and believe it or not, yes, this is a better description of the movie than any plot synopsis you'll ever read)

Poseidon (any version of this movie works for me, but this is the one I own) in which the tabletop-RPG-esque characters find themselves in an escape room with only a certain amount of time to get out. Except it's not an escape room. It's a ship. And the ship is upside down. In the ocean. And their starting location is the ship's top floor.

Legally Blonde (or John Tucker Must Die which ties with Legally Blonde for this genre of comfort movie) in which there is a ex-boyfriend douchebag, a pretty blonde student who is misunderstood (but not dumb), some misunderstandings and/or poor decisions that almost ruin everything, and some awesome women who fucking slay.

Emma, a movie with the typical Jane Eyre lighthearted intrigue/gossip, societal drama, and the actual embodiment of the Mr. Darcy you all seem to have in your heads.

Honorary Mentions: I watched both of these movies for the first time pretty recently, so I couldn't put them on the list... but I think in the future #6 will be replaced with Jennifer's Body (which is like Black Swan but done Mean Girls style and with a healthy dose of feminism)... and American Heist (in which Hayden Christensen's character gets trapped in a prison pipeline story), which might get on there too because it's exactly the kind of movie I'd want to cry about on a bad day.

Tagging @kcrabb88 @librarianladyx @coruscantrhapsody @ooboowoonkoonooboo @tired-bshocked @foreverchangingfandomsao3 @palfriendpatine66 @battlekilt @underacalicosky @that-gay-jedi @ihathbenobiwankenobied but only if you want. No pressure.

[fcklouie]

(—) ★ spotted!! LOUIE WILEY on the cover of this week’s most recent tabloid! many say that the THIRTY-NINE  year old looks like CHRIS HEMSWORTH, but i don’t really see it. while the ACTOR is known for being ASSERTIVE my inside sources say that they have a tendency to be CALLOUS i swear, every time i think of them, i hear the song WITHOUT ME- EMINEM  {he/him / cismale} - penned by laice again!

basics

full name: louie ryan wiley nickname: lou, lewis age: thirty-nine gender: cismale pronouns: he/him hair color: brunette sometimes with blonde highlights eye color: blue sexual and romantic orientation: hetero occupation: actor tattoos: same as fc favorite season: summer favorite color: purple favorite music: rock favorite animal: sloths fears: being poor. hobbies: rock climbing, hiking, mountain biking.

biography

louie grew up in melbourne australia, he was born to two farmers and lived on a very small ranch. he had nothing growing up and he hated it. he always yearned for more. he resented his parents for having a child they could barely afford, he resented them even more when they had a second. it meant they had even less for him. he knew from a very young age that he was going to do whatever it took to make it big and be able to roll around in his money. 

he auditioned for many, many tv shows and films, and got a few cameos here and there, appeared on neighbours like every aussie who made it big did. but his first big break was when he was cast as jack in titanic. and from there his career just sky rocketed, and everything he’d ever wished for came true. 

of course to the public perception and the media he was a golden boy, he was hot, australian, the��‘nice guy’ in interviews, the one who made everyone laugh. he had it down to a tee, but that was simply not true behind close doors. anyone in the industry or who knew him personally knew he was downright evil. he cared about one thing only and that was making more money. he wasn’t generous or kind or caring. he only thought about himself and he made sure everyone knew what he thought of them. 

he never dates over thirty. he prefers whatever hot, young model was on the scene next. and he always got away with it because he was a heartthrob. and as soon as they aged out of his category he was onto the next and he always found a way to make it seem like it was their fault. of course they tried to slander his name in public, but somehow everyone usually took his side, he was the dream man after all, how could he not be perfect?

he is a father to one son who he never sees. he sends the checks for child support and calls it a day. he never intended to be a dad and as far as he was concerned that child was an accident and a huge mistake. he wants nothing to do with him, another thing that wasn’t surprising for anyone who knew him personally. he was too selfish to care about a child. 

wanted connections

baby mama- the person he got knocked up and now is a single mother to their son. he actively avoids her as much as he can, doesn’t show up to any baseball games, birthday parties or christmases. he’d call her his biggest regret of a relationship 

the current hookup/gf- they’d have to be in the 21-30 age range, if they’re nearing 30 they’re getting close to getting the boot and being replaced. he would shower them in gifts while gaslighting them constantly 

partner in crime- another asshole he can be an asshole with, preferably around his age. 

costars- i’m going to have his filmography up in a bit but it’s going to have a leo dicaprio/ryan reynolds/bit of chris hemsworth vibes. 

the one who calls him out on his shit- either they’re friends and they do it or they hate each other and they do it, i don’t mind which

the ex he runs back to- i wouldn’t use the term run really, just if he figures it’s time to cheat he calls them up. 

[scarfanon]

They made Elsa look like a poor man's Emma Frost, and Christoff looks like a fucking Hemsworth.

My friend blocked me because I wouldn’t stop sending him this picture

[siremasterlawrence]

New Bodies Part 3-4

My days of Justin Baldoni have been awe of wonder with tons of ass on my cock, plenty of fucking and more and more people fall under my sway.

No matter how many bodies I change I scan never be detected people always think I am the same such a great experience of course I had more plans.

Expending on to on screen jobs the man is at my will taking me to a new audition I slam I with a strong powerful walk to me they are in me.

They can’t stay away from me their eyes lock on to me so madly drawn to my way of being and soon enough they are falling under my sway.

I get the gig now working with Liam who is Chris Hemsworth brother and I have made my choice to possess him next as the month passes by.

One day I knock on his door to his trailer as he says come in, I offer my hand in his he took it and my palm sinks the micro chip in to his skin.

Poor Liam has no idea the chip is sinking in to his skin setting a bee standard for his life as my next skin to possess for as long as I wish.

He stops for a second I kiss his cheek right before life comes out of him for a second he freezes for a minute and watch the light as I go out.

I walks around him widening his arms for him so he can fall back in to my arms feel his scent shower on to his skin and I can smell it.

His eyes roll back in to his eyes sockets the man is all mine to take ownership of him in my body and I lean in to kiss him slowly one last time.

I guide him back to the couch then look in the back of his head my staring him down and I return to face him checking him to see he is in a blank space.

I press the button his body breaks in a batch of a million robotic pieces spilling on to the couch I sit in it the skin melting in to my the suit flows over me.

The slime burns me in to deep states of rock and lime then shatters revealing the core of it ultimate new body made for my sole use only

I rise up to a full length mirror in his skin he so so sexy with his hot face looking back at me with a big grin his lips widen up showing such white teeth.

I grab the ends of my shirt throwing them up with attitude it is so damn sexy his sweat is all over it and spin about seeing my ass pop up in the air.

“What are you expecting of this movie man?tell me.” Liam ask.

“Well! I want to move on with my career so I can get bigger.” I say.

“I see!” His reflections arms cross.

“Hey babe! This is my body now.”

“Yes your body now”

“No wait! Fuck”

“You are hard “

“Why? Release me”

“Because I have assumed control “

“Why did you smack me?”

“You will be in line”

“You have no say in this “

“Sir Yes Sir”

“So much better “

“I still hate you “

“You will learn to serve, obey and move me”

“No! I refuse to excuse you”

“I am your…Master”

“Sir Yes Master Lawrence Sir”

“Will you serve me?”

“Focus on the mirror “

“Smile for me”

“Show me some teeth”

“Good boi”

“Mmmmm…fuck you “

“Oh My God!”

“Tell me!”

“Tell you what?”

“How much you love this?”

“How much you want this?”

“Fuck you…I don’t hate you”

“No duh!”

“I love you !”

“I love you too”

“Admit it!”

“Fine!”

“Well! I need you “

“For what ?”

“Own me”

I woke up in strange sensation while I am in a triangle my head is swirling through the air and I woke up in a new room.

I rise from the bed roaming at all four walls, the ceiling, the floor and nothing is more or less familiar.

I a sickness overall consumes me from in my body he is fighting me, he backing in to the wall the pain surges with the man flaring up in anger

“Who the fuck is?”

“Who am I?”

“I am not Liam anymore “

“Who am I?”

“Oh Wait!”

“Patrick Wilson”

“Uuuuggggghhhh!”

“Why am I sick?”

“Get out!”

“Who are the you?”

“The new body owner”

“This is my body now”

“Fucker!”

“Hell no!”

“Obey “

“Nnnnnooooo”

“OBEY ME!”

“Yyyyeeessss”

“Call me Master”

“Master Lawrence “

“Yes Master”

“You will love me”

“NEVER!”

“STOP IT!”

“I Am”

“You are”

“What?”

“Time to get dressed”

“Hell Yeah”

“This is my body “

“Where is your closet?”

“There it is”

“I need something sexy”

“Show off “

“This body “

“My body “

“No my body “

“Needs to be on display “

“Bastard”

“Submit to me”

“Succumb”

“Yes succumb “

“I deserve your body”

“I conquered it “

“I crave you “

“You want me to have it”

“Of course”

“I am your god”

“My god”

“Relinquish”

“To you ?”

“Nice try “

“How dare you ?”

“I am already in charge”

“Where are you ?”

“How did I get in to these clothes?”

“Master Lawrence won”

The end

[kpfun]

SCOOB! (2020) dir. Tony Cervone

[uniiiquehecrt]

It... is incredibly sad. :T

I would say that, given Taika's particular commentary on Thor through various interviews, Taika didn't love the genre that Thor previously fit into at all. (There's also something to be said about how Chris, for all of his clear passion for Thor in the beginning seems to have, fallen out of love with Thor as well... Not entirely, but enough to cause ... //gestures at every issue there has been, lately. Though I'd imagine that has more to do with the marvel/mcu fandom's insistence that he's 'boring' and shouldn't be the main character than anything about Thor, or the various early interviews with Hemsworth and Hiddleston that dared to try and pit the two actors against one another concerning character popularity, when they get along wonderfully together.)

— On the topic of Jack Burton and Wang Chi, gosh. You're so right about that too. It probably was supposed to be Valkyrie, even if she also doesn't have much of a character to her. So much so that I can say with confidence she doesn't have a clear sense of direction. (but then none of the cast of Ragnarok does and that's saying something.)

And perhaps the most insulting part about that, beyond the fact that poor Valkyrie genuinely did deserve to be a standout addition to the cast with her own strengths and faults alike, is that Loki is right there. You know, the guy who is Thor's closest companion and foil? Who is always his antagonist as well as occasionally his villain, who has every reason to oppose Thor out of all of his angst and love for and towards the man? It's definitely not as if there is no Loki without Thor, and no Thor without Loki, and the two brothers have a perfectly wonderful push/pull dynamic where, when one goes up, the other falls down, and there could have been room for them actually meeting at an equilibrium after Dark World.

But, nah. Thor can't have his 2 most meaningful relationships in his life (Loki and Jane) because he needs to be going nuts over losing his hammer, I suppose.

omg, really? Really?

And here I thought my opinion of Thor: Ragnarok could not get worse.

In Big Trouble in Little China, Jack Burton is the sidekick, but he's unaware he's the sidekick. He certainly was not brought upon this world to "get it".

Don't get me wrong; I can see it. Big Trouble is a send-up of the genre. It's a loving one, though, and I'm not certain Waititi loves the genre that the previous Thor films fit into. He is doing a send-up, though.

A character like Jack Burton is fun as a one-off. But what a sad thing to do to a hero like Thor. I guess instead of a truck, all he wants is his hammer back. And they carry it over into the next installment.

They don't really seem to have a Wang Chi character, though, and that probably contributes to the problems of the film. (Wang Chi is seated next to Burton in the above clip. Superficially, he appears to be Burton's side kick, but he's actually the hero.) I guess Valkyrie comes the closest in that she wants to drive her sword through the heart of the murderous hag that is Hela.

Ugh, how sad.