#PLEASE Rika is so pure

[breakcut]

Care Recipient: Laurie Strode | Continued from HERE

Rika quickly applies aid to Laurie's wound, carefully applying the antiseptic agent as the words leave the young woman's lips. {Done for.} The phrase causes the caregiver to pause for a moment, her gaze meeting the other's as she looks up from her injury. "I-it'll be okay, I promise."

She had been left behind before, the feeling of dread creeping up her spine as she felt she was merely prolonging the inevitable. But, this time was different. Rika was the one lending aid to another. She was the one that could help them to safety... And she wasn't going to abandon Laurie.

Rika smiles softly, finishing up wrapping the other's leg with gauze. "Don't worry, we'll make it out of this..." She pushes herself off the ground, extending her hand to Laurie as her smile widens.

"Together."

[yache-berries]

HUGE SHOUT-OUT TO @drawnbinary FOR MAKING THIS A VERY SPECIAL PRIDE MONTH!!! 🥹🌻🍊✨️

[sugoi-and-spice]

Konbini Crush

Like my work? Please consider commissioning me or contributing to my Ko-Fi!

Fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen

Pairing: Yuta Okkotsu x Reader

Rating: G - Minors still DNI though

CW: Nothin. Just pure sickeningly sweet fluff. :)

She was pretty sure that the cute guy she often ran into at the convenience store had a girlfriend. 

Maybe it was the kind, committal energy he gave off, or the fact that he often seemed to be talking to someone named Rika on what she assumed was his bluetooth, or maybe it was even just her own pessimism. Enough years in the throes of capitalism and the dating scene having brought the truth to her eyes that that no guy this sweet could ever be single. 

Whatever the reason was, it was a tragedy of course. He was cute as a button and absolutely her type. But maybe in retrospect, it had been a blessing in disguise. After all, the fact that he “had a girlfriend” meant that she had no chance with him. And that gave her no inhibitions from talking to him.

He was a gloomy-seeming guy at first, but when she finally worked up the courage to speak to him — asking him if the salted cabbage bento he always bought was any good — he instantly lit up.

“Oh yeah! Really good.”

She learned that same day that his name was Yuta Okkotsu. 

The next time she saw him, she learned that he was on his school’s kendo team. Although, it was a little weird the way he reacted when she asked about it.

“That’s why you carry that practice sword, right?” she asked, “You’re just coming off from practice?”

“O-Of course!” he answered with a nervous laugh, “It’s a practice sword…”

Yes, the awkward almost-surprise he gave her was a little odd, but also he was just a little odd. Everything about him held a sort of bashful energy, and yet strangely enough, not an anxious one. He held himself with a lot of confidence, a comfort in himself and his skin that was really rare these days. But not in a boastful way by any means. He seemed like a former wallflower that had truly bloomed.

Ugh, she knew that she shouldn’t have been hyperfixating on him this way. He had a girlfriend afterall. And yet still, when 6pm rolled around, she found herself taking a little extra time at the onigiri shelf, waiting to hear that gentle lilt that always made her heart skip a beat, waiting for—

“Good evening.”

She turned to Yuta with a tired, yet giddy smile, “Good evening.”

He took his spot next to her, looking through the refrigerated bentos and natto just next to the onigiri.

“How was practice?” she asked.

“Oh you know, same old, same old,” he answered, pausing his browsing so he could look her right in the eye, “How about you? How was work?”

“Nothing special, burnt my hand a little on the grill,” she answered, showing off her bandaged palm, “Boss yelled at me for doing it in front of customers. Same old, same old.”

Yuta was instantly concerned, “Oh no, are you alright?”

“Meh,” she shrugged, “It hurts a bit still, but I’ll live.”

He reached for her hand and then paused, looking at her for permission, “May I?”

She blushed a little at that, “Oh! Uh, s-sure…”

Yuta proceeded, taking her hand into his own. He ran his thumbs along the length of her bandages, applying just the slightest pressure. He was gentle with her, just like he seemed to be with everything. She found herself getting lost in that touch, in the idea of what it would be like to feel that sort of gentleness everywhere else…

“Alright, how’s that feel?”

She blinked out of her thoughts and looked back down to her hand, processing just how it felt. And to her shock, the stinging had actually gone away.

“W-Woah!” she said, holding her hand up to her face, “It feels great! What are you, a sorcerer or something?!”

Yuta laughed, waving her off, “No, no, nothing like that. It’s just a circulatory massage. Helps with the pain.”

“I’ll say,” she said in disbelief, waving her hand back and forth freely.

“You should still keep the bandage on for a couple of days though, to let it heal.”

“Will do, will do. Thank you,” she smiled, still completely engrossed in the painlessness of her hand, “This birthday isn’t totally shit after all.”

“Today’s your birthday?”

She froze. Shit, did she say that out loud? Her face turned bright red at the realization. God, she must’ve felt like she was totally fishing for a compliment or “happy birthday” or something now! She couldn’t be more embarrassed.

“Yeah, ‘fraid so,” she finally answered, trying to play it cool as the picked up a spicy tuna onigiri, looking over the ingredients on the back.

“And you’re spending it buying food from the konbini?!”

Okay, he seemed genuinely shocked and a little upset by that (what a sweetheart), so maybe he didn’t think she was totally weird for bringing this up out of nowhere.

“Living the dream, I know,” she chuckled.

Yuta shook his head and tutted, “No, no — I don’t think so.” He grabbed the onigiri out of her hand and placed it back on the shelf.

“Hey— My dinner!” she whined.

“We can do better than this. What do you say to some sushi?”

She blinked, genuinely surprised, “S… Sushi?”

Yuta rubbed the back of his head, an embarrassed little blush spreading on his cheeks, “Well, it’ll be conveyor belt, but I know a really good place if that’s okay with you.”

He clocked her awestruck expression and immediately panicked a little.

“Oh no, that was way too forward wasn’t it?” he looked down, a nervous muttering she’d never seen from him taking over, but maybe one that he’d lived with for a long time before, “Of course you don’t wanna spend your birthday with a total stranger…”

She finally was able to catch up to all this and realize just what he was saying.

“N-No, it’s not that!” she insisted, “I’d love to get dinner with you. It’s just…”

He tilted his head curiously.

“What about Rika?”

Yuta’s eyes widened a little, “Rika?”

“She’s your girlfriend right? I hear you talking about her or to her on the phone a lot,” she paused, alarming as she realized just how that sounded, “N-Not that I’m eavesdropping on you or anything!! I-I just overheard and well, ah crap…”

Yuta’s expression steadily softened through her babbling as he realized just what she was talking about, what she did and didn’t know about Rika. He smiled as he processed just how worried she’d been, and what exactly she’d been worried about.

God, was she cute.

“Don’t worry about the eavesdropping thing, I didn’t take it that way.”

She sighed, relieved.

“And don’t worry about Rika, either. She’s not my girlfriend.”

“No?” she lit up.

Yuta shook his head, “No. We’re close but she’s… Well she’s my sister, basically.”

She cocked a brow at him, “Basically?”

He laughed a little awkwardly, “It’s uh, it’s a little complicated. But really, you have nothing to worry about. I’m perfectly and pathetically single.”

If she were being honest with herself, that sounded totally like a red flag. A girl that was like a sister to him? That had cheater, cheater pumpkin eater written all over it. And yet, there was something about his demeanor, the look in his eyes and the way he said it, that felt genuine. That made her inclined to believe him.

And for a sushi dinner with the cute konbini guy she’d been pining over for weeks, that was good enough for her.

She grinned in a way that had Yuta’s blush returning full force.

“Lucky me.”

[yourstrulyrika]

rika <3 was wondering if u could write smth about leon reassuring reader? maybe she insecure, thinks that leon deserves someone better (ada maybe?)

you are sooo sweet to us all, i hope you are taking care of yourself!! xoxo

hello ♡ of course!! i actually love this concept, been thinking about this, so ofc! also love you too ♡ i’m glad all of you are following me!!

no warnings, pure fluff and comfort. heavy mentions of insecurity and mental struggles though. reader is hinted to be Leon’s mission partner, but not stated directly!! re4r!Leon :3

you’re insecure, to say the least. always thinking you’re not good enough, that you’re ugly, undeserving— and then there’s Leon. the most perfect man you laid your eyes on, and he’s your boyfriend. he loves you, more than life itself — but even when he tells you that, you don’t quite believe it. Leon is honest, sure, but what if he’s just saying this? what if he just doesn’t want to make you upset? those thoughts keep nagging your head. your mind is your own hell.

and there’s also Ada. Ada Wong — Leon has said so many times they don’t share anything, that he doesn’t like her that way.She’s just the part of his life he can’t get rid of—

and that mere sentence strengthened your doubts. it got worse. so much worse.

you saw her like once in your life, and the way Leon looks at her. you started thinking he loves her, doubts eating you alive. Ada is so much prettier, so much better, smarter, stronger— the list can go on. you hate it. what if Leon likes her more and is with you out of pity? after all, he knows Ada for long years right? You know about the kiss— he says it was just Ada using his feelings and all that. you did not believe him. not one fucking bit.

since then, your mind has created a whole new scenario that Leon doesn’t love you. you can’t help it. you started isolating yourself, closing yourself in your own world and not speaking to him. any attemps at conversation coming from Leon were futile. you just couldn’t find it in yourself to speak. why would he want to speak with you anyway? he has Ada, right? she’s so much better.

but, Leon was going insane. losing his damn mind over this. he knew something was going on. why won’t you talk to him? what’s going on— why are you so damn quiet? pushing him away? he feels so confused, but also so stressed out over this. what happened? what did he do wrong?

he tried talking to you, but you just.. won’t budge. and he feels so damn horrible. he just wants to wrap you in his arms and comfort you.

“Please, just speak to me. Baby? Please, I beg you. I love you, you know that, right?”

you hear his words, but you don’t respond. why can’t he just go away? obviously he’s lying.

but he just gets so damn frustrated. he’s growing fucking desperate. your doors are locked— not letting him in. but he won’t let you isolate yourself any further. he literally breaks down the door to reach you, finding you laying down on the bed.

he kneels down beside your bed, reaching out to take your hand in his. when you don’t reach back, he frowns, but doesn’t push any further. instead, he lets you have your own space.

“What’s going on? Please, talk to me. No matter how silly you think it is.” he’s genuine when saying this. he genuinely cares about you so damn much, wants you to be happy with him.

you hesitate to respond, mumbling out a single “Ada Wong.”

and it was enough to hit him with a damn reality check. you were insecure about Ada. you were always insecure, but surely Ada’s appearance didn’t help. the way he’s looking at you, so sweet and loving, it tells you he understands. he stands up, sitting on the bed to cup your cheeks.

“Oh baby. I’m so sorry. So fucking sorry.” that’s all he says while looking into your eyes to make sure you understand what he’s saying.

“I know what you think. I can see it right in your eyes. But please, don’t think she means anything to me. She’s a part of my past, sure, but she’s just the past. What matters is right now — and right now, you’re mine. I don’t feel anything towards Ada. That feeling left years ago. Please, let me prove it to you.” he says as he presses his lips to your forehead, interlocking your fingers together. you let him in, let him hold you. and he’s so damn happy over this — so desperate to reassure you.

“I missed holding you so much, princess. I love you, and only you. I’m all yours — everything I have, it’s also yours. My body, my heart, my soul belongs to you.” he whispers in your ear, laying down beside you, turning your position a little so you face him while he holds you.

“And I don’t want anyone else. No one. All I see is you. Everyone else just don’t matter to me. You’re all I want.” he’s peppering your face with little kisses, hoping you hear him out. he makes sure you fall asleep that night, in his arms. he’s holding you in his arms through the whole night, not letting go.

“There’s no one better than you. Not even Ada, Jill, Claire— no one. No. One.” he says this firmly, making sure you understand. or at least tries to get it into your head. he’s so hopelessly in love with you, literally could die for you. one could say he’s almost obsessed— in a way, he is. he thinks about you 24/7, even on his missions, when about to sleep, when training.

he falls asleep eventually, once you’re asleep— and when he wakes up, and sees you awake, he’s already all over you.

“Please, don’t leave me. Never leave.” he begs you; you can see how desperate he is. you never see him so open with his feelings. but he just can’t handle the thought of you leaving, he’s so damn terrified about this. looking at you with vulnerable, soft eyes, pleading you to understand. he loves you with his entire heart, and he means it.

“I won’t. I love you, too.”

you say, and that much is enough for him to pull you into a kiss. a deep, loving kiss where pours all his love into. it lasts until both of you are breathless, but even then, he doesn’t want to let go. lets you catch your breath, before pulling you into another kiss. locking your lips with his own, cupping your face. when he pulls away, he looks at you again, with a soft smile on his face.

“Let’s have a lazy day today, okay? I just want to pamper you, show you I love you so much. Just let me take care of you — I want to make sure you won’t ever doubt yourself over Ada again.”

[lxmelle]

JJK0: Gojo’s secret words and Chapter 236: A Satirical translation Geto’s “……”

Gojo: "I love everyone, so I'm not lonely anymore..."

Geto: ........... (Another love confession? Srsly - translations in edit were my own, lol)

Give him a break Gege 😂 how many times does he have to witness people telling him that they love someone else?

Yuta: From here onwards, let’s really be together forever. I love you Rika. (愛してる used; a more traditional “embarrassing” way to profess a romantic love).

Rika: “daidaidaidaidaidaidai daisuki da yo!!” (Uh, it’s like “so so so so so so so- I love you SO much!!!")

Riko: Kuroi, I love you! From now, and until forever!

Kuroi: me too...!! I love you...

No wonder love is like a curse - people seem to die if they get confessed to.

People loved Geto and I think it's not a stretch to imagine that when love was directed to him, it might not have been voiced out. Geto witnessed confessions made to other people. If they loved him, he probably never got told because this isn't really a part of the Japanese culture.

The twins: love, love, love.

It is interesting to note that they don’t actually say they love him. Just 「大好き」 which literally translates to “big liking/affection”. It is implied through.

But the panels above and below refers to Gojo (above, Geto: “my best friend” in the past tense, “there was a fight and that was that.” And below, MimiNana: “we couldn’t forgive the Gojo Satoru who killed our Geto-sama, but we were willing to let it be...” it is cut off in my screenshot, but it goes onto say because Gojo was Geto’s one and only best friend).

One could also stretch the interpretation and say that because they recognised the love Geto has for Gojo, they were be willing to let it be. Just like Yuta recognised the love Gojo has for Geto and sought to slay Kenjaku so he didn’t have to do it again.

Larue and Miguel again noting in their exchange that they all loved Geto, and they cared for each other like family. There was another time where they referred to being familial, but loving wasn’t mentioned, so I left it out on purpose. But it was implied. Geto had a set of scrolls hanging behind him at the temple that said, “Death to the foolish, Punishment for the weak, Love for the strong.” I guess he felt all those things were true. But when it was his end, he only wanted Gojo Satoru there. I’m glad he got to choose who killed him I guess. And his family escaped.

So with Gege’s love for foreshadowing, maybe all of those scenes of confession-witnessing and love implications parallel with this moment:

Ha.

It really would make so much more sense if Gojo’s last words were, in fact, 「大好きだよ、僕の親友」 (“I love you, my best friend.” - in fact, it makes more sense than simply, “you’re my one and only best friend.” It is pure headcanon though (´∀｀)

As I mentioned earlier: The phrase 「大好き」 and usage of it doesn’t necessarily mean romantic love, but rather “to like a lot”. I’ll hold my hand up and say I’m not native speaker though, so please accept my apologies if I’m wrong and please correct me if I am! My understanding is that the context matters a lot. The English VA said it was three words in the English language - “my best friend” sounds weird conversationally. “You did well” seems oddly placed and may not illicit a blushing smile. “I love you” seems more apt. Personally, anyway.

I don’t think the same word-limit is imposed in the Japanese version. So again, I think it’s a phrase like “I love you my best friend”. Because it was also apparently embarrassing and said before within jjk0 (could be anyone’s words) but never between them.

So the criteria is met as Gojo is likely to use Rika’s version of “I love you” (daisuki da yo) over Yuta’s “I love you” (aishiteru). Not likely said between them in their friendship.

Also, because he has used it in chapter 236 to refer to the students - so! It is not a stretch for him to say that to Geto. It also explains why Geto goes, “…..” as the phrase of affection may have been familiar to him. He may be thinking about how Gojo has grown and reflected on how distant they felt - when the line was drawn. He notices that Gojo recognised the shift in him. Or, it could be that he “overthinked” that he was replaced.

And then the clincher is, ofc, where as soon as Geto thinks he can conclude that Gojo has been fulfilled by his students cuz he said he is no longer lonely and he had an all-out brawl with another man that he (Geto) never managed to give the Strongest, he is told: his presence would have likely made Gojo satisfied. Bahahaha!! Yes, you shed those tears... you’re loved, you dumbo. (I say that lovingly.)

Gojo Satoru as the Strongest may have needed something you can’t give, but Gojo Satoru as himself was only satisfied with you. Can you be honest now?!? Gojo, is it really enough for him to be by your side and waiting for you at the airport, huh??? Or was it enough for you to see the millennia-old Kenjaku be shocked silly by Geto’s body proving his undying love for you by moving when you called out his first name?? lol. These boys make me feel like a giddy schoolgirl at times; yeah, if only this story wasn’t so dark.

Anyway, it’s an overdone analysis, I know. The common consensus is that Gojo tells Geto he is his best friend. But to me, it makes the most sense for his last, most sincere words to Geto, to be a confession of his feelings for him. It aligns well with Gojo saying he needed him to feel fulfilled in chapter 236 and his tearful / heartfelt chuckle. It aligns well with the love is a curse theme, and love following Geto everywhere, and him witnessing people professing their love too. He just never really knew that he was loved, or if he did, the one that mattered the most was Gojo and if he had known, it may have helped him receive love (be happier) in this world.

I mentioned earlier that love was seen to be a curse by Gojo. And through what Geto knows about cursing and what he has witnessed through the deaths and burdens carried by those who have loved and lost... could this be a reason for why Geto doesn't say it back to Gojo?

We will never know. Nanami chose his words to Yuji as well. So saying something like, 'I deserve to be cussed out at the end' is vague and as much as an apology.

I've said in a previous post too, that I personally feel his heartfelt smile was like a thanks and a nod to how he could smile sincerely - recognising the same bond they shared over their blue spring.

Like the hidden words kept between them, I hope his way of communicating was something also understood just between them.

That’s it from me on this topic - thanks for reading if you did.

Sorry if some of it is repetitive.

[queenendless]

🍂🍁💝Thankful (Adult!SatoSugu x Adult!Fem!Reader ft Various JJK)💝🍁🍂

A/n: Spontaneous short fiction.

Sequel to Spooky Lovin'.

Happy Thanksgiving to those who celebrate. To those who don't, well do whatever makes you happy.

Lots of characters/pairings, pure cavity esque fluff, with a twist!

All credit for JJK goes to Gege ... despite what happens canon wise.

*Please don't plagiarize, translate, or repost my FANFIC work. Like, reblog and follow instead, thank you.

The enriching enthusiasm boomed out throughout your private abode.

You watched in beaming amusement through the open archway at the packed company.

Yuji laughed at what Megumi had to say which made the other smile; both close together on one end of the couch.

Nobara gushed over showing Maki upcoming winter attire releasing on her phone, to which the latter was intrigued, both also bundled closely on the other end of the couch.

Kento and Yu leaning against the wall, drinking apple cider as the latter rambled enthusiastically on their latest endeavor, while Ino popped in, praising a blushing Nanami on his caliber as his sorcerer icon.

Aoi clapping and weeping all up in the big TV showing Takada-chan's live performance in the themed parade happening down South.

Panda and Toge jumping in the leaf piles, a beaming Yuta swinging a giggling Rika around through the whisking leaves. Kamo sipped tea on the front patio as he watched the sunset.

Down the way, a car crossed by, with Shiu at the wheel and Toji eyeing the house with sharp ambivalence. Part of him missing his kids but accepting long ago that this is where they truly belong, nodding for Shiu to drive off.

A tipsy Shoko cuddling up with a blushing smiling Utahime in the hot tub on one end and Mei lounging and sipping on cider on the other end with Ui holding her bagged gear and waiting on her outside the tub, on standby, cause he's just that devoted.

Mai and Momo taking selfies together in the backyard garden before teasing a flustered Kasumi after Kokichi gifted her a flower in her hair.

Yuki and Choso; also in the backyard, napped together on the bench under the tallest looming tree, cozy smiles on their faces.

Kusakabe excused himself just to sneak into the bathroom to try out the jacuzzi.

Nanako and Mimiko braided Tsumiki's hair as they sat at the katsudon, smack dabbed in the center of their spacious living room.

Junpei blushing from Tsumiki noticing him gazing at her, smiling widely in return, to which a flushed Junpei jumped from Megumi's stern-faced warning to which his sister complained for him not to scare him so much and a nervously laughing Yuji consoled his horror buddy by hugging him and patting his back, simultaneously trying to calm down his boyfriend going all overprotective brother mode.

Masamichi made some festive themed cursed corpse dolls that were taking up space on the other couch.

Kiyotaka fumbled with his drink as Akari's beaming smile had him and Arata covering their flushed faces from how pure she looked.

Riko and Misato assist Suguru in the kitchen as they prepare the food.

Suguru, knowing you were still unwell, insisted you take it easy and let them handle the feast.

You had been feeling unwell the past few days.

You called in sick today when you felt something change.

You had to see for yourself.

And when you did, you felt inspired to message everyone you know for an impromptu get together at your place. The word spread via group chats, texts, and calls.

Watching everyone enjoying themselves at your impromptu get together heightened your spirits.

Just not for the festive touch.

But to be surrounded by all their beaming warm faces when —

Satoru warped right before barging through the front door with dramatic flair, exciting a few, scaring some, and annoying the rest.

“Honey, I'm home~!” Dropping the bag of pies on the counter, Satoru smooched Suguru fully on the lips.

The moment he noticed you practically glowing, the Six Eyes told him all that there is and will soon be, straight down to the first traces.

In that moment, everyone inside and outside felt the shifts in the cursed force as Gojo warped right before you, startling you out of your hidden viewing spot, his arms wrapping around your figure to catch you. You imagined his eyes trained on the right spot.

“You … you're …”

You couldn't suppress your smile. “I found out this morning. But I didn't know how to tell you both. I had a feeling your Six Eyes would show you the truth – AAH~!” Your yelp as he lifted you up in the air reverberated throughout the house, grabbing everyone's attention.

“Gojo-sensei?!” His students exclaimed in a jumbled mess.

“Satoru! Be careful – !” Suguru's concerns were cut short when he watched as you tugged down that blindfold just to see Satoru's awestruck eyes with your own.

Tears made his eyes sparkling that much beautifully, sniffling softly, beaming with that lovestruck smile as he lowered you down to embrace you, swinging side to side gently, laughing as he smooched your face with so many kisses.

“Y/n … thank you.”

As he sets you down; keeping you wrapped up in one arm, his other arm waving you two's partner over before intertwining their hands together to pull him in quickly. “Suguru~ We've got the hottest scoop of the year!”

Pressing himself right by your side, Suguru leaned down as you got up on your tiptoes to whisper your secret right in his ear. His stunned face was all you could read as he replayed your words in his mind, but he wanted to be certain. “Are you sure?”

Satoru's closed eyed smile and thumbs up added to the buildup. “These eyes don't lie!”

Burning wetness swelled up in those beautiful almond eyes as Suguru kissed you lovingly, smiling at you in the same smitten manner. “Best news ever.”

“Everyone!” Satoru hollered as his arms became yours and Suguru's thrones, lifting you both up, as he floated for literal joy. “We're having a baby!”

“And yes, it's all true!” You exclaimed boldly, knowing the people would take your word more easily than Satoru's.

First stunned silence. Which immediately erupted into cheers and applause of congratulations.

The twins, Tsumiki and Megumi were the first to get up and hurry on over to embrace you, shedding tears of joy.

Yuji and Haibara high-fiving Satoru who was over the moon.

Nanami shook hands to congratulate Suguru, warning him to make sure Satoru took extra caution with taking care of you and your little bundle before embracing you himself. You personally wanted to deem him as the godfather, just a side note.

As those from out front and out back swarmed in as the announcement shot straight through the roof from the loud groundbreaking importance.

After all the girls in the house fussed over you with hugs, advice and offers to help you through this new adventure, your husbands were in the same boat with almost everyone.

Except Kusakabe who was stuck in the bathroom for a while since the hallway was filled with the rest of your guests.

After embracing and congratulating you themselves, Riko and Kuroi announced the feast was ready.

Exchanging kisses with both your loves, you gave a toast.

Toasting to the new addition to your growing unique family.

Now that is cause to celebrate.

[rhythmic-idealist]

The thing about Yuuta using just "positive energy" to use RCE (a refresher: Shoko needs to "multiply two negatives." Yuuta doesn't) is like. It's love. That's what that is, that's what that's code for.

And I'm so impressed, that Yuuta knows how to heal with it. I've been thinking about his relationship with his friends and him all having this unbelievably dangerous job, and with the fact that he must be one of their go-to healers in it, Yuuta who's mindful of never again doing a "we'll be together, forever and ever." And who also knows that when you're a sorcerer, in some ways it's a requirement that the job kills you (or at least, that you are exorcised upon your death). And yet he is a healer, he's again and again going to be the person trying to prevent that, and in some ways it must throw him into that street crossing over and over and over again, right?

And he uses positive energy to do it. He doesn't need to multiply two negatives.

It's love. It's Yuuta we're talking about, he's using love.

I was wondering just now whether he learned to use pure positive energy for it before or after he broke Rika's curse. But I now think it was definitely before. It makes sense as a stepping stone for learning to break her curse, and:

Rika's "it's always you!!" moment comes right after Yuuta wraps Maki in a bubble of RCE.

It's an expression that he loves them, and Maki, with the scariest injuries, has received the strongest dose of it.

And here Rika is watching Yuuta heal using healthy love, the kind that he's learning in his quest to free her, and it's a kind of magic that is so opposite everything she has been in his life since she died. It's healing people around him, when you could say that her love for him—and his for her, the way he's cursed her to stick around—has only done the opposite of that, these past several years. "Please don't hate me."

And learning to love like this is something he learned while figuring out how to break her curse. He learned it via Rika. She doesn't know that yet, it's not observable in this scene.

But anyway, and so of course that scene becomes something much more literal if it happens after Rika has watched Yuuta wrap Maki in a literal bubble of love.

Yuuta uses positive energy straight, even in the most dire and horrible and emotionally gutwrenching of situations, and that's how. He doesn't need to be happy or unworried to use it, he just needs to learn to healthily channel love. And he's done that.

Anyway and so of course it's positive energy he's using at that point. Of course that scene makes more sense if it's love.

(And yeah, I do think that the ability to channel positive energy has broader implications for the end of JJK, but that's a matter for a different post.)

[smallestapplin]

Would you still love me, even if I was a worm?

Please note there are 3 Pokémon classified as work pokemon and they are all bug types

Wives edition (only Cynthia, Rika, and Cyllene cause my wrist cannot handle more.) pure fluff

Cynthia

-

“Babes?”

You look up at her as you lay across her lap.

Cynthia looks down, her uncovered grey eyes locking with yours. She can’t help but smile, you look so cute in her lap, gazing at her with such love yet curiosity.

“Yes, dear?”

“Would you still love me if I was a worm?”

Her brain stops.

She blinks once, twice, before rapidly doing so. You look at her so earnestly, like you want a genuine answer….but-

“What kind of worm would you be? It would I entirely depend as Snoms, Caterpies, and wurmples are all wildly different. And if you want to be technical burmies as well, since they are the bag worm Pokémon-“

“Cynthia.”

“Oh, yes?”

“Would you love me if I was a worm?”

“Dear, that entirely depends on which worm though!”

You watch as she rambles, listing off the logistics, and what each worm needs and how well it would do in certain environments.

She probably would, but you’ll never get an answer as her mind plays all sorts of scenarios.

-

-

Rika

-

She loves it when you spent time with her at work, she’s usually alone so no one is around to tell you or her off for this, and she uses every chance she can to love on you. But she notices you have something on your mind.

She hums, moving you from her lap to on top of her desk.

“Got something on your mind, doll?”

“Would you still love me if I was a worm?”

Oh you’re too cute for her heart to handle! You look so meek, so nervous, so adorable, fuck she loves you.

“Oh sweetie.” Rika places a kiss to the tip of your nose.

“I’d buy you the best fruits for your little work self to feed on, let you ride around on my shoulder just so I can still love on my buggy baby.”

Her smile grows as you giggle, covering your mouth while you do so, but she continues.

“Get you a nice big enclosure covered in pretty flowers, and with a nice branch for you to get cozy on. And of course a lot of the most how quality dirt I can get ya.”

“All for me?”

“All for you, no matter what you’re my sunshine.”

And she will be damned if anything happens to you.

-

-

Cyllene

-

You knew what the answer would be, at least, you thought you did. After getting injured and being sidelined until you’re fully healed, you’ve been bothering your betrothed a lot more now that you can’t leave the village.

And she’s the only one constantly around for you to lovingly bother.

You sat in her office, Abra dozing in your lap from all your comforting pets. The silence being filled with Cyllene’s pen moving across paper.

Your silence has her concerned, usually you’re more chatty or at least much closer to her, you never sit to the side like this.

“Cyllene?”

She glances over to you before looking back at her paperwork.

“Yes, dear?”

“Would you still love me if I was a worm?”

The office falls still and quiet.

Her pen to the side and she looks deep in conflicted thought.

You thought you’d get an out right ‘no’ but you never thought you’d make her spiral.

You can see her arguing with herself in her head, unsure of what to even say. On one hand she loves you dearly, you mean so much to her, on the other hand….she loathes bugs, she can’t even imagine being in the same room as a wurmple!

But the bug would be you…

But….

“Cyllene, please breathe!”

She’s snapped from her thoughts as you gently shake her, your arm around her back and your free hand on her forearm.

She takes a few deep breathes to calm herself, but you can’t escape her questioning.

“Why ask such a thing? You know I love you, correct?”

“I do, I just…thought it would be a silly thing to ask, maybe joke about it?”

You nervously laugh, feeling her steen gaze staying locked onto you.

“You truly are something else.” She sighs.

But you perk right up “But that’s why you love me!”

You’re right, but damn.

[marshmallowprotection]

I saw your MysMes pride icon and I can't help but wonder if you have any reasoning behind your HCs for the characters or if it's just based off vibes ? Some are a little obvious, like Saeyoung or Jumin, but others make me curious ? (Transmasc Yoosung? Hell yeah?)

(Also Rika crush on V being comphet is so funny to me.)

Some of it is purely on vibes and things I've taken away from their character journeys over the years. I've had HCs shift a bit over the years the more time I've spent with these characters but they have generally stayed the same more or less the longer I've thought on it.

Trans Yoosung is actually one of the more popular HCs for Yoosung, or, at least, it always has been in the circles I've encountered. It's the same for his bisexuality, though, his bisexuality has become far more apparent to people over the years thanks to the RAE. Thank God for that! Pansexual Zen just makes sense to me. I don't think that I have ever gotten another vibe from him. I just took one look at him and I knew he and I were one and the same. (I'm panromantic.)

Saeran has always been bisexual in my eyes. It doesn't matter how you slice it, his dream is a prince/princess/royal partner who adores the title he gifts them as he spoils them for the rest of their lives. He is a bisexual who wants to whisk you away to a pretty castle with the best garden around. He's also demisexual. It took him time to warm up to the idea of being intimate with another person... but the more time he spends with you day by day, the more open he is exploring these newfound feelings he's discovered that weren't there before. (I'm demisexual, too, and it took me years to figure out a lot of these feelings and I think he would have the same journey.)

Like, Lesbian Jaehee is a given. We love our sapphic queen and I always enjoy picking out a new image to slap over the lesbian flag every year for her. Saeyoung is a character that has such a broad spectrum when it comes to how people view him, he IS canonically bisexual, but when it comes to his gender, there's no wrong way to label him. I've settled into the genderfluid label for him, but I love to see other HCs like trans and nonbinary Saeyoung.

I've fought tooth and nail over my Ace Jumin HC over the years because I've unfortunately encountered a lot of acephobes who genuinely take "personal insult" to the fact that I have an HC that doesn't affect them. Oh, yeah, if anyone here takes insult to that, please, kindly see the door and don't look back. I view him as sex-neutral. He's not against intimacy with his partner if they do so desire sexual intercourse, but he's not the one to bring it up first. He's just indifferent, and that's okay! There's a whole spectrum of feelings in the ace umbrella. Some people are sex-positive, some people are sex-repulsed, so on and so forth. Everyone's valid! Better not see anyone say someone's not valid.

I don't believe Vika is comphet per se, it's definitely a far more complicated situation than that with a lot of nuance. I've talked about it before but it's been a while. Rika and V's relationship is built on their unfortunate dependency of one another. They cling to each other because they've found someone who provides something they've been searching for... and it spirals out of control because they're simply not compatible as they are.

At times, it feels like they're forcing themselves to be together, and in essence, it's not wrong, because once you make a pact to take the fact you killed a woman and covered it up to your graves, you're tied to a person for the rest of your life whether you like it or not.

Jihyun wants to explore Rika's darkness and pain, taking all of it on as a God, a Savior if you will, so she feels "like she's contained the devil"! He genuinely did want to help, but he had no idea what he was doing, and that led to pain on both sides. Whereas, Rika was truly looking for someone who could help her feel like she could shine like the sun, or, at the very least, come close. Part of her adoration for Jihyun comes from wanting to become him, to embrace his identity, and no longer be Rika because he is her ideal.

She did love him for what it was worth, and he did love her in return, but it wasn't a healthy love. Perhaps, if things were different, maybe things could've worked out, but they weren't different, and it spiraled so out of control that it not only hurt them, but also the people they love. When I look at Jihyun and Rika Kim, I ultimately see two messy, complicated people I can relate to, who... don't really know who they are because they are too afraid to be more than what they "have" to be or one reason for another.

Rika is really bad about trying to become other people to escape herself. A lot of supplementary canon material shows her journey to be anyone BUT Rika. She mainly focuses on trying to become Jihyun, but hell, there's an ending in the RAE where she tries to become MC, in essence, because they were able to win over GE Saeran. There are some gross folks who think that ending is romantic, but it's not. That is 100% about Rika desperately trying to become someone else to be loved (be it romantically or platonically, depends on the situation.)

She wants to be loved as herself, but how could she? She's the devil who did terrible things... she killed a woman in cold blood, and it does not matter if it was self-defense, she can't sleep at night. She did so much worse in Mint Eye, willfully mind you, Mika wasn't there to put thoughts in her head.

There's something comforting to me about Rika self-reflecting on her feelings and life experiences and... realizing in the end that she would be happiest with a woman above all else. Her religious trauma, desire to contort herself to a "perfect image" to hide her true self, and so on speak to me as a person. I recognize all of her romantic endings with MC are built on toxicity, and the desire to consume more of what she has to take everything from Jihyun to be him, but somewhere in all of that, I think there's an earnest part of her that felt at ease with MC as herself. The MC in that bad ending did accept Rika as she was and it was all she ever wanted.

But, the sad thing is, because it's a bad ending, it focuses solely on the destructive aspects. Had Rika been able to remain steadfast in therapy and met an MC who understood her before she met Jihyun, I'm certain the story would've been much different. Actually, that's the only way I'd see a Rika Route working. It would have to make the player meet her before Jihyun.

But, anyway, no, I don't think Vika is comphet per se because they DID love each other in some ways, and that's okay. I don't think Vika's relationship should be minimized or labeled differently just because I view Rika as someone who realizes she is a lesbiromantic demisexual woman later in the story or because I view Jihyun as a panromantic asexual man who figures himself out in his journey of self-discovery. Get that "gold star" thinking outta here, folks.

Sexuality is a spectrum and fluid for many, and we all experience things differently, there's no magic box for the "perfect" definition. Sure, some people know their feelings from a young age, but that's not the case for a lot of people. Live and let live, and whatnot. Don't get caught up in semantics and disparage your fellow queers. We get enough shit from homophobes as it is to be spending any of our time trying to destroy each other. And, at a time when our trans family is in a great deal of danger, they also need our support as much as we can give it. Great time to say, terfs get the fuck out of here, etc, etc.

Oh, and when it comes to Vanderwood? I've always viewed him aroace and nonbinary. There's such a broad spectrum when it comes to how people view him, too, because we're given such little material to go off of canonically. I'm always interested to hear otherwise for him because I think it's intriguing how we all end up interpreting this guy with little to nothing to go on other than the fact he will save his skin first and he wants to be named after Tony Stark.

[mystic-headcanons]

would like to once again say how wonderful your recent saeran fic was!! i love it dearly <3 and i also have a request if they’re still open! could you do some more hurt/comfort with ge saeran about him coming off the elixir/withdrawal and the nightmares and hurt/comfort that no doubt follow? i’d imagine him and saeyoungs relationship probably starts out rough and the physical symptoms of withdrawal are hell. (no rush to write this, and if it’s too similar to what you just wrote feel free to skip this request! thank you! <3)

thank you sm !!!!!!! <3 i was VERY excited to write this

placed under the cut because this got longer than i expected

THE FIRST NIGHT:

saeran couldn’t move. his limbs felt like lead and his mind was splintering and he was shaking like a leaf. his body was a livewire, and every beat of his heart sent a wave of shock coursing all throughout him. it was pure, unbridled white-hot pain. if there was anyone in the room with him, saeran couldn't feel them. if anyone was trying to speak to him, saeran couldn't hear them. all saeran could hear were the voices of his personas arguing back and forth, each one fighting for control. all saeran could feel was the complete agony that he was in-- and he could only blame himself for that. maybe if he were better, if he were stronger, if he weren't so disposable, things would be different. or...or maybe if he wasn't so gullible, if he didn't trust the first two people that showed him kindness, if he just...just wasn't born at all. saeran was sure that he was screaming out in agony-- though he couldn't hear it, the way his throat scratched when he swallowed was a good enough indicator. if mint eye was paradise, then this surely was hell.

however, by some miracle, saeran survived the night. he honestly did not think he would- the pain was excruciating and saeran was begging a god he no longer believed in to just let him die already. surely, hell could not be worse than what he had been experiencing all night. slowly, the pain ebbed away until it was a low, pulsating thrum. his vision returned to him and the first thing he saw was her, with her head bowed to her hands and mouth moving impossibly fast. behind her was saeyoung, with tear-stained cheeks and red eyes....and saeran hated it. hated him for being there, for seeing saeran at his worst. (this wasn't his worst, not really. his absolute worst was when rika forced him into mint eye, when saeran was forced to take the elixir. was forced to hate his own flesh and blood because he was too weak.) slowly, saeran's hearing returned to him, and he could hear the last remnants of a prayer fall from her lips. saeran didn't believe in any god, but he'd say as many hail mary's as it took to remove the devastated look from her face. he'd fall to his knees in the confession box, would beg forgiveness if it meant she wouldn't look so broken.

her name fell from his lips as if it were his own broken prayer, and her head snapped up at the sound of his voice. "oh my god, you're still here." her voice cracked as she leaned forward. her embrace was as gentle as could be, and saeran had to force himself to not fall apart yet. saeyoung was still in the room, and saeran would not allow himself to cry in front of his brother. that was one weakness he wouldn't show him. "so are you." he responded, voice just above a whisper. speaking felt like someone was actively taking sandpaper and harshly rubbing it against his throat, and he winced at the pain. she must've felt it, because she pulled away and reached for the glass of water at his bedside. "of course i am. saeyoung and i both didn't leave your side once." the mention of his twin had saeran's eyes narrowing at his brother. "can you...tell him to leave, please?" she hesitated for a moment, looking back at saeyoung before looking at him. "he's-- darling, he's really worried about you--" "please." he cut her off, begging. his mind was reeling and splitting and saeran could not be around his brother, not right then. there was a part of him that knew rika lied about his brother, that knew he was brainwashed and forced to believe in her sick lies, but it would take a lot longer than one night for saeran to move past all that. all the trauma and the dark thoughts and the "my brother abandoned me, he doesn't love me, he hates me he hates me he hates me." mantra that was, quite literally, beat into him. (and more than that, there was the, "killsaeyoungkillsaerankillsaeyoungkillsaeran" mantra that he stuck to for months. hurting his brother became his only life goal, and that wasn't something that he could move on from so easily.)

she looked back at saeyoung once more, who got the hint and nodded. there was a flash of pain in his eyes, but he hid it quite well and even managed a smile. "i'll go...find something for you to eat." he mumbled, before shuffling out of the room. it was silent for a beat as she fussed over him some more; on her lap sat a bowl of water and a rag, and she gently ran it over his skin. "i had to do this all night." she quietly mentioned, tears gathering in her eyes. "your skin was...god, it was burning hot. we really didn't know if you were going to make it." "but i did." he weakly clutched her hand in his, giving it a squeeze, "and it's because of you. you took care of me."

THE FIRST WEEK:

the entire week had been rough. though saeran wasn't in as much pain as he was that first night, it wasn't by any means comfortable for him. his insides still felt like they were liquifying, and he was taking more aspirin than he should've because his head felt like someone was repeatedly taking an ax to it, but he was alive. he was alive and, somehow, his heart was still stubbornly beating. saeyoung didn't visit him during the day, but saeran knew he was there during the night. (saeran woke up once, at three in the morning, to soft sobs and hushed whispers. he'd cracked his eyes open just enough to see saeyoung being held by her. there was a brief moment of intense jealousy, but that eventually ebbed away to sadness. would she be happier with saeyoung? with someone who wasn't as broken, as weak, as pitiful?)

the night became a relief for saeran. his pain drained him to the point of pure exhaustion, to where saeran would fall into a dreamless sleep. yet, no matter how long he slept, it never felt like enough. he always woke up somehow more exhausted, somehow still weak. "you're fighting off an addiction, saeran." she'd said to him when he voiced this thought. "both your mind and your body need time to heal. you also did not sleep at mint eye. like, ever." saeran could finally move, but he had to lean on her to take even a single step. she supported his weight, was right there for him to lean on and never once complained about it. she took everything in stride, and saeran couldn't help but be in awe of her strength.

keeping solid food down proved to be a challenge. keeping anything down, actually, was hard. saeran took one sip of water and would be dry heaving for fifteen minutes. it was like his body was trying to expel anything that entered it. he knew it was worrying her, knew it was worrying saeyoung, too. this could only go so long before he'd wither away into nothing, before he'd close his eyes and not reopen them. he'd always been thin, but now he was like a skeleton. (every time saeran passed the mirror, he had to avert his eyes. it hurt to look into.) it was vanderwood, surprisingly, who'd ended up saving him. they'd entered with an iv and a bag of fluid, and refused to meet his questioning gaze. "better for both of us if you don't ask anything." they said, their voice gruff. "but this will help. it's what they give you at hospitals and stuff. just-- get better. for her. for saeyoung. and for yourself."

THE FIRST MONTH:

it was a mistake to leave saeran and saeyoung in the same room alone. saeran knew that saeyoung truly loved him, but there was still so much lingering hurt and anger. and saeran was growing increasingly annoyed at his own inability to do...well, anything. he was weak and he couldn't even sleep through the night because he was terrorized every time he closed his eyes. and although saeran loved his twin-- he truly did, deep down-- he just snapped. "this is your fault!" saeran yelled, gripping his own hair in frustration. he didn't even know what saeyoung had been talking to him about, just that he had mentioned the state saeran had been in for the past month and it completely set him off. "you left me alone with our mother. you let me get taken advantage of by rika. you left me. you got to throw parties and make friends and forget all about me while i had to spend my existence in constant suffering. you want to know how to make me feel better, saeyoung? kill yourself. maybe then, i wouldn't constantly be reminded that i'm the mistake. that i'm the weak one, the one who always gets left behind." the more saeran spoke, the more saeyoung's face fell. of course, as soon as the words left his mouth, saeran was regretting them, but...well, the damage was done. whatever relationship they'd managed to string together was ruined, and saeran could only stand there as his twin silently cried.

"you were the only thing keeping me alive, even after i left." saeyoung quietly spoke, looking down. "i do not exist without you. i thought about you every single day. and if i knew that this is what rika was going to turn you into, i never would've trusted her or v. all i wanted to do, saeran, from the moment we entered this world, was protect you. even if it-- even if it cost me my life. and i wish you could see that." saeyoung sighed, and suddenly he looked so much older than he was. it was clear to see that the years they spent apart was taking a toll on him, and saeran didn't know how he could miss that. "i'll leave you alone, now. i won't say anything and you won't have to see me. i'm just-- i'm just glad that you're alive. that's all i need, is to know that you're happy."

both saeran's mind and heart felt heavy as saeyoung left the room. he paid no attention to the hushed voices outside of his door, instead choosing to slowly sink down on his bed and stare at the floor, tears slowly dripping down his cheeks. he'd wanted to hurt saeyoung-- wanted him to feel a fraction of what he felt, but why did it feel so unsettling? there was no satisfaction, no sense of justice, nothing. in fact, saeran felt so much worse having yelled at his twin. he barely registered the sound of the door opening and closing, or the way the bed shifted as she sat next to him. she reached out, gently carding her hand through his hair as she pulled him in. “you know he loves you, right?” she said, pressing a soft kiss to the crown of his head. “i know it’ll take time to unlearn everything from mint eye, but you need to understand that saeyoung loves you more than anything else in this world. you are his brother, and there isn’t a thing he wouldn’t do for you.”

“…do you think he hates me now?” saeran’s voice was quiet and hoarse when he spoke, and he leaned his full weight on her. “there’s not a thing you could do that would make him hate you.”

THE FIRST YEAR:

it had been a rough year. after those first few months, saeran was physically better, but his mental state was the absolute lowest it’d ever been. it got so bad that saeyoung, vanderwood, and his own partner had all taken to watch over him in various shifts. it had been awkward with saeyoung at first, their relationship torn and tattered at saeran’s hands, but they worked through it. it was a very long process, with saeran sometimes snapping at him or pushing him away- metaphorically and physically. saeyoung kept him occupied, would tell tales of princes and princesses, of happy endings. (where was his own happy ending? did he even deserve one, after everything he did?) vanderwood didn’t really say anything to him, but on rare occasions they would tell embarrassing stories of saeyoung that would have saeran softly laughing and his twin crying out in rage. for all that vanderwood said about not liking anyone in that house, it was clear that they were now apart of saeran’s fucked up little family. however, it was when she watched over him that saeran wouldn’t let himself hide anything. he bared it all to her- his thoughts, his feelings, all of his fears. she had this way of grounding him, of taking everything he said and telling him what he needed to hear.

jumin ended up recommending a therapist for saeran to try, and though he was against it at first, he ended up going. (there was no choice, not really. it was either therapy or, as vanderwood so lovingly said, “we could always try electroshock therapy.” while cracking their taser. saeran’s not really sure if that was a joke or not.) slowly, saeran’s mental state became better. there were still bad days and there would always be bad days, but saeran no longer thought of just ending it all, of taking the burden off of everyone else. however, with therapy came the nightmares. now that his mind wasn’t actively working against him and could rest, the nightmares snuck up on him.

most nights saw saeran sitting up with a sheen of sweat on his features. when she felt him stir, she’d sit up too, her arms automatically going around him as he cried. there were dreams of him killing saeyoung, of him killing her. of saviors and elixirs and being forced to comply to the abuse. the worst ones, though, were the ones where he never left mint eye. where he was never saved and would always remain at the savior’s side, a loyal companion. it was those dreams that left saeran in a state of total fear and despair. she was always there to dispel that fear, though. she’d hold him close and whisper until he fell asleep. would tell him things like, “it’s not your fault, saeran,” and “you are good. down to your bones, from the top of your head to the tip of your toes, you are good. you cannot blame yourself for what you did under the elixir and under rika.”

she always had bags under her eyes, and there was always a hint of exhaustion within her, but she never complained. she was still as bright as the sun- always joking with saeyoung and teasing vanderwood and treating himself with the upmost care and softness. one night, after a particularly bad nightmare, one where she left had left him, had told him that he wasn’t worth saving, saeran had sobbed in her arms. “why are you with me? you would be happier with saeyoung.” his words caused her to pause for a moment, a perplexed look on her face. “no? saeran, i’m at my happiest with you. i love you more than i’ve ever loved anyone. saeyoung is my best friend, but you’re the love of my life. nothing will ever make me leave your side.” her words did little to dispel the bad thoughts form his head, so she took his face between her hands and looked at him. “saeran, my love. i would take a million sleepless nights, would live out of a cardboard box, would live on the run, would do anything if it meant i could stay by your side. i don’t want anyone else but you, okay?” and she kissed him. it was a featherlight thing, and very quick, but it had warmth spreading out over his entire body.

“even when i’m like this?” he quietly asked, sniffling. “when i’m plagued with nightmares every time i close my eyes and neither of us can get enough sleep?”

“even then. i’m not ever leaving your side.”

it took a very long time, but the nightmares subsided. his therapist put him on medication that, admittedly, saeran was very wary of. he only took it after saeyoung and vanderwood thoroughly looked through its contents and ensured it was safe for saeran to take. slowly, he had started getting better and had started to open up to saeyoung. they had very long talks, the two of them, that often ended up with both of them in tears. saeran had picked up gardening at his therapist’s recommendation, and he would often spend hours out in his garden. there was a part of him that worried that he’d no longer hold the love for flowers and gardens that he once had- he spent a lot of time in the gardens at mint eye, too. but the moment he picked up gardening, those fears dissipated. she would often be in the garden with him, had taken to laying in the grass and cloud gazing with him. “i’m proud of you, y’know.” she’d said one day, turning her head to look at him as she squeezed his hand. “you’ve come a long way since mint eye. it has been….a very long, and very hard struggle. but you survived it. and i couldn’t be prouder of you.” saeran didn’t know how to tell her that it was because of her. that he only had the strength to keep going because she was strong, because she stayed by his side through it all and never once wavered. all he could do was lean in and kiss her, but he knew she got the message all the same.

[sleepingdeath-light]

all hail the saviour ; 18+

kinktober day fifteen

pairing ; rika kim x unspecified male!reader insert

fandom ; mystic messenger

masterlists ; fandom | kinktober | ao3

content ; dominant!rika kim, submissive!reader, oral sex (f receiving), exhibitionism, referenced body worship, implied pussy worship, implied praise kink, implied climaxing untouched (reader)

minors and ageless blogs do not interact

There were a great many perks that came with being the saviour’s right hand: being transferred out of the standard shared lodging to a more private room closer to her own, being afforded more freedom to express yourself through your clothing rather than being restricted to the same uniform the other members wore, being able to move more freely around the compound without the same clearance restrictions that used to keep you contained, and being able to spend more individual time with her than your fellow worshippers, amongst a great many other smaller benefits that could have easily gone unnoticed if you hadn’t been a follower of hers for as long as you had. Of course this new higher ranking position also came with plenty of work for you to do on behalf of, or even alongside, the saviour and, of course, some tasks were much more pleasant than others — making the elixir, for example, for how vital of a job it was for Mint Eye and the saviour, was always an extremely exhausting process that was only made worthwhile by the promise of praise that was sure to come when you were finished.

Though not every assignment was unpleasant or stressful. In fact some felt less like work and more like a glimpse into heaven itself, like what you were currently doing.

—————————————

Rika — as she’d once insisted you call her in private — was an objectively gorgeous young woman, with hair like spun gold and enchanting emerald eyes that were all too easy to get lost in if you weren’t careful. If only she’d say the word you’d spend hours worshipping her body: mapping out each and every perfect inch from the crown of her head to the soles of her feet with trembling hands and trembling lips until there was no part of her left cold and forgotten and unseen, whispering prayers and pleas and praise with a reverence so unmatched that surely even she would be brought to tears and deem you worthy enough of having her, putting everything you have into this show of pure devotion until she’s had her fill and you’re so exhausted you barely have the energy to breathe anymore. And if she asked to use you instead then you’d give her your body in a heartbeat — even less than if you were able.

So when she spreads her legs so tantalisingly on her throne and beckons you over with the curling of a finger and a melodic call of your name, you’re falling to your knees and hoisting her thighs over your shoulders before you even get the chance to be anxious about the crowd of people surrounding you both. Hell, their presence doesn’t even register to you until you’re already barely a hair’s breadth away from her wet pussy and Rika — gorgeous, sweet Rika — praises you for being so eager to please her above all else while placing a gentle guiding hand on the back of your neck.

You pause for a moment, for the span of a breath or two, and Rika almost coos at you, rubbing gentle circles on the back of your neck with the pad of her thumb as she speaks up again in that disarming tone of hers.

‘Go on, love, it’s alright,’

And that reassurance is all it takes for you to refocus on the task at hand.

Her pussy truly was a thing of beauty — from the neatly trimmed bush of golden hair that stood proudly at the apex of her thighs, to the lips that were positively glistening with her sweet slick, all the way down to that warm fluttering hole that felt so good that you often dared to think that perhaps you were made just to fill it — and you made no attempts to keep your admiration of it a secret, shamelessly moaning and grunting and groaning into the wet silken flesh of her cunt as you devoured her addictive nectar like a man starved. You licked fat stripes along the length of her slit and moaned at the flavour of her as it coated your tongue. You sucked her swollen clit between your lips and oh-so-gently grazed your teeth across it, delighting in the way that her hands grasped at your shirt and her hips bucked up into your mouth. You dragged your tongue down again and plunged it into her gushing entrance and felt your whole body shudder at the way she fluttered and clenched around you. You tongue-fucked her while nuzzling your nose up against her clit and had to stop yourself from grinding against your clothes when the pleasure of being surrounded by her taste and scent and touch became too much for you to take. You shifted hour position once again to trace cursive letters and meaningless patterns onto her clit while you reached up and started gently thrusting two fingers into her tight hole, grunting praise and pleas, and cusses against her cunt as you went — too pussy drunk to think about anything but her. And then when she started to soak your hands with her slick you licked yourself clean and repeated the process all over again, driven only by your need to please her as the world beyond her voice, her body, her taste, faded away to white noise.

Rika’s voice was starting to get pitched and airy now — you could tell that much even as her thighs were clamping down on your ears and muffling everything but the sound of your own heartbeat — and you could practically taste how close she was to her climax. Her grip on your neck was starting to border on painful and you were almost certain that her nails had torn a hole in the back of your shirt, but all you could think about was getting her to cum on your tongue and proving to the others why you were chosen to be her right hand instead of anyone else. Why you were the only one who deserved to be between her thighs bringing her to climax however many times she desired.

All it takes to push her over is the crooking of your fingers into that one spot inside of her that you’ve long had committed to memory and then she finally loses her composure completely. She’s clamping down on your head so hard that you can’t even move a single millimetre away from her cunt to catch your breath, and your face is dripping wet with her cum from your eyelashes to your chin, and you can distantly hear her crying out your name, and your whole body is hot and trembling, and your vision is blurry and covered in white spots, and you can feel a wet spot forming on the crotch of your pants as your abs spasm and burn and twitch, but you’re sure that this is as close to heaven as you’ve ever been in your life.

[ciaossu-imagines]

MYSTIC MESSENGER V WITH ARRANGED MARRIAGE AU PLEASE thank you I always enjoy reading your writings

Aww, you're so sweet, my dear! I'm really flattered to hear you enjoy reading my stuff and I hope you'll enjoy this as well. I had a lot of fun with this, honestly, so thank you so much for the request!

Okay, so I don't actually think it's too much of a stretch to imagine either V's father or Chairman Han, both being from very wealthy and affluential families, setting up arranged marriages for their children. So this 'AU' isn't really a huge shift in universe. I think the biggest change, going into this, is that V and Rika never met. I can see V still having met and helped Saeyoung and Zen, but the RFA was never founded and Rika is never a thing with V.

In fact, relationships were never really a thing with V. He's dated here or there but nothing serious. His life just is too full, too stressful, too busy for dating. V's relationship with his father is very contentious. V is still very much working as a photographer and his work is very well received and beautifully done. People pay top dollar for it but he never really achieves fame because he avoids the public eye and that is something that his father holds against him.

V's father wants his son to set aside his photography career, to take over the family business. To smarten up and behave as the son and heir to the family should, in other words. And V's father has tried numerous ways of forcing V into doing so.

And the newest of those ways? It's definitely the arranged marriage decided upon by V's father and your own parents, who do own a major corporation but are rather nouveau-riche. This really does set them aside as lesser than by a lot of people and they view this arranged marriage as a way to elevate your families status in the wealthy circles and V's father sees it as a way to force his son to settle down, start a family, and because he'll have a wife and hopefully children to take care of, it only makes sense that V would set aside his 'silly' artistic endeavors and take up his mantle in the business world with the family company.

It seems perfect, at least to the parents of both of you.

To both you and V though, the idea is a little less than ideal. You're prepared to hate V out of pure hatred for the idea. You aren't even sure about your stance on marriage. You may or may not want marriage to be a thing in your future, but the fact of the matter is that even if you do want to get married, you want to get married to someone you choose, someone you truly love. You don't want to be forced into anything and that force is what you hate the most.

V, meanwhile, is nothing but angry at this turn of events. But as I've mentioned, V doesn't deal well with anger. He doesn't know how to handle it at all, doesn't know how to deal with it, and feels disgusting for the huge surges of anger he is feeling. So instead he focuses that anger into other emotions. He's feeling super guilty and ashamed of his father's actions, of the pressure this puts on you when he walks into the restaurant where the two of you were to be introduced by your parents for the first time.

It surprises you that you find it really hard to hate V right away. It surprises you even more that you feel an automatic tingle of physical attraction to him and you wonder if that tingle was strong enough to really influence your thoughts. But you don't think that was it.

V apologizes, countless times, for the situation you find yourself in. He consistently blames himself for you being forced into this arranged marriage, takes all the blame for it and any anger or sadness you feel about it.

Though it takes a few meetings, because your parents and his father are consistently with the two of you, when the two of you first get together alone, V makes it perfectly clear to you that if you want to get out of the arranged marriage, he will be perfectly okay with that and would not blame you. He even offers to find some way to make sure the arranged marriage ends without you being blamed in any way. He warns you that might take a little bit of time, but he'll figure a solution that will leave nobody with any doubt that the breaking down of the arranged marriage was entirely on him.

Like, the man is so very, very guilty over every and anything related to this and he is always apologizing to you.

Now, I can see the rest of this going in either one of two ways. The first way is that you take V up on that offer of figuring out a way to get out of the marriage. Whether or not you're willing to let him take all the blame is entirely up to you, but either way, he is right in that it will take a little bit of time. The two of you continue to play into your parents, seeing each other often, having 'date nights' used to plan and bounce ideas off each other for how to bring this all to a close. But somewhere along the way, you find your conversations with V actually becoming conversations. The two of you start to actually get to know each other and you start to fall for V a little. He's sweet and kind and creative and he can be funny in a dry, witty way. And he finds himself really falling for you too, but both of you are still convinced that the only thing the other wants is to get out of this arranged marriage.

And besides, V in particular doesn't want to enter a relationship with you on those terms. He doesn't want to be dating you only because the two of you were supposed to be getting married anyway. He spends a lot of time wishing that the two of you had met in any other way, under any other circumstances.

So, in this ending, I do see the marriage contract ending, just like the two of you had planned and it does break your heart and breaks V's heart. V withdraws, he needs to heal some of how much he hurts when things with you seem to be over for good, when he thinks he'll never really see you again. The two of you go months without seeing each other until you bump into each other again. It could be at a party, through mutual friends, or maybe you purposefully tracked down a show he was doing and showed up to the gallery to see him again. Either way, the two of you start talking again and I think this time, without the expectation of marriage there, with more free-will from the start, the attraction the two of you have towards each other has more room to grow and really bloom and the two of you end up dating.

The alternate way this could go? You refuse to break the arranged marriage. As much as you hate it, you're so loyal to your family and your parents and care about them too much. You know how much this means to them. So the marriage does go through and the story becomes V and you learning how to be a married couple together, how to get over the forced approach to the relationship with each other. It involves learning to be friends first, helping V heal the shame and guilt he's feeling, helping him really stand up to his father and prove that, even married, he does not and will not inherit the family company, that he is happy with his art. It involves a very, very slow burn love story, with lots of drama and conflicts, which can also be really fun.

[dojapat]

Kirara Rising Chapter 2

Later that day every student at the school was assembled to debrief after a competition with our sister school in Kyoto.

“OKAY, EVERYONE!” Said our overzealous teacher who was supposed to be leading a lecture. He twirled on his tip toes with his unusually long arms pointing straight out. In spite of the room being filled with dour teenagers he was loud and chipper. My head throbbed with every word he shouted.

Every proportion on this man seemed to be stretched to a ridiculous degree and his fitted pure black suit only accentuated these bizarre features. The visible half of his face was alabaster white, with delicate pink lips that were habitually curled into a mischievous smile. His eyes were obscured by a pitch black blindfold that wrapped evenly around his head. The blindfold was so tight it somehow kept his snow white hair sticking up as far as it could.

His name was Satoru Gojo. A man of 27 years behaving childishly in an attempt to either pester his students or make them smile. If he was attempting the latter it was failing miserably.

“Can you cut to the chase, Gojo!?” A young woman rudely exclaimed. She was Maki Zenin. A girl that was as beautiful as she was brutish. Her hand to hand fighting skills were the most refined in the whole school. She wore a pair of tattered, taped up glasses underneath her neatly trimmed bangs. Her ponytail was high and mighty like her attitude.

“What’s even the point of debriefing,” a deep, sluggish voice chimed in. The voice came from a student named Panda. His name was self explanatory. He was a large burly beast perfectly resembling a panda bear with the exception of his gift of speech. Despite this gift he rarely had anything of note to say. “Yuta and Rika manhandled everyone in Kyoto.”

“Salmon” his friend wisely proclaimed. Toge Inumaki was an impish young man with well maintained, gel spiked hair. His cursed technique required him to talk in rice ball ingredients. Though sometimes it was hard to hear what he was saying seeing as his mouth was covered by his collar.

“Guys, please I was more of a liability than anything!” Yuta Okkotsu sheepishly argued. His dark messy hair stood up on end and the dark rings that painted his face from countless sleepless nights were contrasted by his wide doe eyes. He was quick to down play his incredible powers as to not feel alienated from his peers. “It took everything I had to contain Rika!”

“No they’re 100% right Mr. Okkotsu! You even had Aoi on the back foot and that’s no simple feat!,” Gojo interjected.

Excluding Hakari who was sleeping off a hangover, this was the entire student body of Jujutsu High.

“You’re being awfully quiet Mr. Hoshi! Any thoughts on yesterday’s performance?” Gojo exuberantly shouted at me.

If Okkotsu was the strongest of the class, I was the bottom of the barrel. Any plan I was involved in came up humiliatingly short. At best I could use my cursed technique as a mild nuisance. Maki and Panda were blessed with over whelming physical strength. Inumaki when he wasn’t talking in rice ball ingredients could command peoples minds. Yuta had a devastatingly powerful spirit haunting him. Combining that with his massive pools of cursed energy and his elite talent at manipulating it he was comparable to even the strongest veteran sorcerers.

Me on the other hand. My power was to draw anyone or anything I touch with my cursed energy levitate towards me, but I could only mark one target at a time. I was studying at Jujutsu High as a technicality. My father was part of the upper rung of decision makers in Jujutsu society known to the layman’s as the ‘Higher Ups’. So despite my lack luster abilities I was to train amongst the extraordinary so that I may one day take on his position so I can do nothing but nitpick and belittle actual sorcerers.

“It’s as the others said.” I said coldly and matter of factly just as father commanded. “Yuta dominated the competition. The other first years provided whatever support they could and did so efficiently.” I hesitated to complete my report for a second. I took a shallow breath and admitted my shame.

“Us second years were a disgrace. Hakari was absent and I was of no use.” I returned to my seat with my eyes humbly facing toward the ground.

“OOH! So harsh! But so true too!” Gojo inappropriately declared. “Regardless of Yuta being a glory hog, I know you each could have handled it if you really applied yourself! Jujutsu Sorcerers are selfish beings! Fighting alone is when you’re at your peak!”

“Are you sure that doesn’t just apply to you?” Yuta shyly countered.

“Who cares?! Like I said we’re selfish! I only care about what I think!”

The class groaned, cringing at his over bearing, joyful facade. “And what I think is you are all winners! Here’s your reward!” He grabbed several hard candies from his pocket and in one impossibly precise motion he had flicked a candy at each of his students.

Inumaki seamlessly caught his piece. Maki dodged hers letting it land on the floor. Panda’s landed directly on his outstretched tongue. Meanwhile, Yuta nervously fumbled his in his hands. Mine landed sadly in my hair, slowly sliding off and landing on my desk. I felt compelled to stare at the dejected confection.

“Class dismissed!” Gojo commanded after seeing several students were sick of him and leaving anyway. “Except you, Mr. Hoshi!” He said pointing at me. “I’d like to talk to you alone”

[anas-tasiaa]

Another day another love for them

Never wanted a family other than Saeran???

My everything??? HELLO????

TELL ME HOW I COULDN’T LOVE THEM??? 

Their unshakeable, unwavering affection for one another? There was not a single doubt in their minds about their love. They would eventually find their way back to each other, no matter their circumstances or difficulties, since that is what they pledged when they were young. 

Do you say their love isn't pure and's not something to cherish? Saeyoung's passion for Saeran is evident throughout the story; no matter whatever route we take, even in the seasonal chatrooms, his thinking, thoughts, promise, words, and longing are all about Saeran. He has dedicated himself to Saeran's protection and will go to any length to keep Saeran safe, even if it means sacrificing his happiness or putting himself in danger. He mastered complex things about a computer, so Saeran wouldn't; He gave up everything so that Saeran could be happy. He provided everything he had so that Saeran might have everything he desired. You know how much he despises his job, but if it means Saeran is happy, then so be it. There is so much to discuss and list, but it would take 37364748 slides in PowerPoint ok.

SAEYOUNG IS WILLING TO GIVE HIS LIFE FOR SAERAN

Like, seriously, he's so devoted yet so loving.

His love for Saeran is literally the theme of Mystic Messenger. Every route, every time. It was Saeran's presence that he yearned for.

Yoosung's route (unexpected encounter)

Jumin's route (Unexpected encounter)

His own route (obviously)

V's route (He suspected that Ray is Saeran & waited for 2 years to finally reunite with Saeran)

Ray's route (All the issues with Saeejong and his first thought is "Is saeran safe?")

Christmas DLC (He hates Christmas because Saeran isn't with him. He wants to believe Saeran is happy out there)

Valentine's DLC (Saeyoung's doll with "brother" as the name)

Birthday chatroom special (Castor and Pollux)

Chuseok season chatroom (He wishes at the moon for Saeran's happiness)

As for Saeran, man, do we have to explain this??? He CLEARLY, DEFINITELY, CERTAINLY adores Saeyoung with all his heart.

I don't know why this fandom depicted Saeran as irritated as he can be when his Saeyoung is present??? Like, please understand that this is merely a stage in his recovery journey, not a personality attribute. He pushes Saeyoung away out of fear that he will be hurt again and as a self-defence mechanism, but he doesn’t hate Saeyoung. He just needs time to be "himself" again. He adores Saeyoung as much as Saeyoung adores him. Saeran's feelings for Saeyoung are strongly ingrained; even after days of brainwashing, he couldn't truly hate Saeyoung. He longs for a connection with him. He waited YEARS for Saeyoung. Let's be honest:

He missed Saeyoung.

He wants to be like Saeyoung.

He adored Saeyoung's unwavering love and his optimistic side.

He waited years for Saeyoung without losing hope.

He doesn't want happiness if that means Saeyoung wouldn't be there with him.

He would feel secure, safe and loved if Saeyoung was there with him.

He chooses Saeyoung over happiness.

He lives with his weak body at Mint Eyes because he is determined to return to Saeyoung; he wants explanation and reassurance.

He mentioned the betrayal every time he met Saeyoung because it was painful, like his half was ripped apart. 

He wants nothing more than not to burden Saeyoung with his problem.

He wants to die with him (Yoosung's route)

He feels terrible for hurting Saeyoung with his words.

He loves ice cream because of Saeyoung.

He loves the first sky he saw with Saeyoung.

He wants to give Saeyoung a geranium (a flower with the meaning, "I'm happy because of you.")

He smiled at the photo Rika took for him because he thought Saeyoung would like it.

He wants a camera to take a picture of Saeyoung and keep it so he can see it when Saeyoung is far away.

He learned computer stuff because he wanted to be closer to him.

He feels safe and sound with Saeyoung beside him. (His confession in 707 BRE2)

He loves fireworks and doesn't want Saeyoung to die before him, or he would be so sad.

He's willing to forgive Saeyoung.

He wants to live together with Saeyoung, just two of them. Like what they promised

He doesn't hate Saeyoung. HE IS NOT. He loves him so much that he's willing to give Saeyoung another chance, even though he's scared of being hurt. Even though he waited for years. There's no one, ever, who saved him the way Saeyoung did. He's his savior.

Man, I wish them a happy life together, just two of them, somewhere far, away from troubles. Live the life you love, my sons. I love you two so much. 

[tierra-paldeana]

@destinybcnds asked:

「Perrin was looking up at Paldea's Pokemon League. It was an impressive building to be sure. Paldea as a whole was a gorgeous region. She could get lost exploring and taking pictures, but she was here for a job. So she made her way into the lobby, looking out for a receptionist. "Hello? I'm here for a contract job with the Pokemon League?" There was a listing for a contract photography gig that she'd jumped on the moment she saw the ad.」

-----

☠🌏– The sounds of her tapping on the keyboard were interrupted as she stopped to look at her RotomPhone for the 10th time this afternoon. Rika put a hand to her chin as she looked back to her computer in thought...

Recently, the Pokémon League had made a decision to renew the billboards around the region, this time with a newer approach that leaned more into naturalism - that is to say, photos of nature and Pokémon in their pure, non-digitally altered form, to celebrate the environmental diversity of Paldea the way it was meant to be seen and appreciated.

Many people looking for work had offered their services through email, but so far, Rika had been turning down every single offer.

What the heck's with people being so obsessed with insisting on using PhotoPoké? That's exactly what we're NOT looking for...

Did people not read the requirements when they filled in their form? The secretary was truly exasperated... and she had been at this for a week. Every. Single. One. Surely, SOMEONE wouldn't--

'My name is X, and with the use of PhotoPoké--'

''God damn it, not another one...!''

She scoffed and took a great deal of air before sighing and clicking on the 'decline' button... and that's when she heard a knock on her door.

''Miss Rika? May we come in? We got someone here interested in the Billboard Renewal Project.''

That was the voice of the guy that always guarded the entrance. Someone had gone to the trouble of showing up in person, unlike 99% of the people who'd send her their portfolio?

''Sure thing. Let them in.''

Going back to her professional persona, she left everything she was doing to greet the lady who eventually entered her line of sight. Behind the glasses, red eyes looked up to hazel.

Damn... she's drop-dead gorgeous...

...Perish the thought, she thinks. There's a task at hand.

''Greetings. I assume you've come because of the BRP, correct? Please, do have a seat.''

A kind but nonetheless firm, professional smile. She hasn't seen this lady on the list, which confirmed that she had gone out of her way to visit the League in person instead of volunteering online. That already earned her some extra points in her book... She was a little tired of sitting around declining email offers all day, to be honest, so this was a breath of fresh air.

[away-ward]

hey 👋

Sliding in our conversation for ask and answered 288, because i'll diverge from kai's mbti and your response to it in another ask, to compare and contrast some other things. (And im sorry about that but of you also being infp haha! Dont worry, i like INFPs! 😂🫶)

"Also please put the reference where Kai when behind Michael’s back with his gf because I have blanked on this!! This little petty jerk." it's in chapter two hideaway. I think that chapter alone in general sums up kai's earliest personality, and his opinion/dynamic of people, including damon and michael's pretty spot on with his type. Like he view people a certain way, and that opinion is harder to change. BUT it doesnt come out of nowhere, damon did his part, and kai was onky reacting to what he see. But then it made a great contrast with emory who i feel like is more perceptive and observant of how dmaon move, because i swear idk it's just me but by the end of nightfall, when damon gave back her tin box, his personality seems a bit muted? So i can see why when damon was beside emory, he seems less aggressive. No because he wasnt aggressive anymore, it's just that his sparring match might be an equal or more. i feel like thats why characters like rika and banks pop off in damons pov, because he gets to be he one shining and in control. Heh, interesting! Just wanna add that that chapter also kinda makes me think that prison didnt change kai mori drastically, his mischief had already existed since he was young. Rules rules rules. Breaking rules. Being dirty. We dont see this from emory's pov. Emory didnt react much when it comes to "dirty" or "taboo" things. We only see self interest, duties, care, pride, arrogance, indulgence and class consciousness in her pov, or at least, mostly. People around her was the one who assumed that she was embarrassed. Like alex in the train and thats a good comparison because alex's ex roommate was embarrassed of their FF hookup and alex was ashamed because of it, but at the bridal meeting with the girl gang, the thought of shame didnt even exist in emmy's pov. So was the shame that aydin tried to make her feel. Then Like will in the rain thinking she was embarrassed of him, like damon telling will how emmy thought of them when he thought she looked down on him for the wrong reasons, she looked down on him because he was hurting people, not because he was embarrassing.

Funny because i feel like damon carried some shame there too because if he didnt care that she thought he wasnt good and wanting to be good, then his characterisation 1. wouldnt involve him being obssessed with befriending kai, loving winter, and doing good. Because he wanted to be like them too, doing good WITH them, 2. being obsessed of being around will because he was pure, and was tiny bit jealous with how he interacts with women, dreaming about the kind of man he could be if he grew up like will. And we saw him intiating his interaction with women he cared about as the story goes on and 3. Getting out-of-his-way pissed off at emory because he thought she viewed will (and by extension, him) as nothing. Like a deadweight, shallow and no hope. For a character as selfish as damon, it's impossible to say that he was only angry at the girls because they made his guys unhappy, because damon thrive around people he loves and want to care for. Have you thought of this possibilty? Even damon's closing arc was about doing good with winter and building the world with rika and banks. Damon needs and actually wanted to be around people like kai, will and emory in his life too whether he wanted to admit it out loud. Beause they also resemble a part of his life that's good and impressive that he wish for himself and the people around him. anyway, back to the point of that shame thing, emmy didnt agree with aydin when aydin slut shamed alex in BC, like how emmy didnt understand why alex was mad in the train because slut shaming a friend, a woman and a sex worker is just not her reality (her pov is very different than rika, banks and winter. There's a lot of sex related shame in their povs, and it's not always because they wanted to be malicious towards other women, but it's a part of their growth because they're prone to be impacted by their surroundings than emmy) and i guess thats why when we see her interact with martin at the police station, we dont see him slut shame her or shame her for things like these anymore because as an abuser, he knew it didnt work or never worked on her before, as the only things that hurt her was the life of innocents, her beliefs and her authenticity for her dreams, her responsibility towards her people and goals, and this includes will and evento a certain the horsemen too. She wanst only sorry for will, she was sorry to kai, damon and michael too.

another thing that i feel like it's true after KAI's mbti discussion, i dont think prison changed kai to the extreme. I think it just escalated him to the person who he was always meant to be and who he wanted to be outside of what he thought he should be. Like it just highlighted his path, not change him from good kai to bad kai. It just heightened his mischief, he can hide behind prison tonexcuse his misdeeds now. Hiding again, again again. A bit different than emmy, where we dont see much of struggle of her admitting what she likes or hiding her likes in private, like shaving herself to wait for will in that shower stall before damon came to scare her, confessing her feelings to that godzilla toy when no one was around, admitting to herself in the train that she finally is ready to share that oart of her with a family who accepts her now, not feeling ashamed with any kind of weird sex in nightfall where even the readers dont agree about. Because she owns herself, it's harder for external reasons or characters to hit where it hurts, but when it hits, like martin with will and her works, damon with her self esteem, and kai in the train about deseving will, she got hurt, and as a reader, some of us feel angry for her too. emmy didnt have any problems admitting herself in the nightfall, but to share it with people in the light, to want to love and be loved the same way with the same intensity, i think thats where her character very much differ from kai. She's not religious, but kai kinda is, so maybe that impacts their story in some ways too. it's harder for her to share it with people about her likes because of her introverted intuition Ni, hence her problem with trust. Ni really likes to be secretive to others, but not to themselves. Usually be seen as a private, nit so much a mystery like Ne. Because Ni is convergent, and Ne is diveegent. Divergent leads to possibilities and mysteries. Emmy tried to uncover will's grandpa, and will avoiding the topic because he likes it that way. But one thing i found interesting about kai now is kai THOUGHT he was being truthful, but when we look at his character again, he did exist behind a lot of lies and mysteries that he cooked up, even from himself, sometimes just for he fun of it, just because he thought they justify his likings, very similar to will, but will was more self-aware than kai. Even though on the outside, will looks like he is less likely to admit it out loud than kai about their wrongdoings. Interesting! I guess thats where their Ne Fi stack interchange, will is more private with his feelings even though he looks like he's open, and kai looks more open but actually his diverging intuition Ne decides it in private.

however, out of everyone, inckuding side chars, the only char that i still dont know to type is Rika. Like wtf is she? I feel like PD is making her to be everything and now her char seems confusing.

never thought i'd like to see more char analysis of kai but here i am! But i think it's also because i probably didnt understand his char as much 🧐

what do you think about this part, ko?

Heyy!! thank you for waiting!

And im sorry about that but of you also being infp haha! Dont worry, i like INFPs!

Oh no, it wasn’t a problem. I just hadn’t even had my morning coffee when I read it the first time. Somehow being sent a list of your personality flaws before you’re even fully awake is not a peak experience.

Who knew?

“Also please put the reference where Kai when behind Michael’s back with his gf because I have blanked on this!! This little petty jerk." it's in chapter two hideaway.

Okay, that’s what I was thinking, but I didn’t thinking that the girl was Michael’s gf, so I wanted to check.

But then it made a great contrast with emory who i feel like is more perceptive and observant

I agree that Emory is more perceptive and observant than Kai. I previously made a post about how chapter two, Kai talks about how Damon has no secrets and everyone knows Will’s business, yet even he, one of their closest friends, didn’t know what was really going on with either of them on that day.

Emory on the other hand picks up on things pretty quickly for the most part, though she does have her moments.

when damon gave back her tin box, his personality seems a bit muted? So i can see why when damon was beside emory, he seems less aggressive. No because he wasnt aggressive anymore, it's just that his sparring match might be an equal or more.

I have a love/hate relationship with that scene. Obviously, I love the interaction. It really adds to the idea that these two have a unique understanding of each other. Damon and Emory were actually abused by people who were supposed to take care of them.

As opposed to Banks and Rika, who didn’t have the greatest parents, but even as things got bad, they mostly experienced neglect. And while the relationship between Banks and Damon was might be called abusive by some, Damon was not ever supposed to be Banks’ caretaker. He assumed that role because he was dysfunctional.

Damon and Emory’s abuse was overall more severe and from a source that constantly framed their abuse as love. They both have an intense love for Will, which is another area where they have an understanding. I’m not the first to say this, but I remember Damon telling Banks that he thought Will was the only one who would walk through fire for him, and of course he wanted to kill someone to force a bond with the horsemen that would tie them to him forever. In the end, it was Emory who helped him bury a body, for no reason other than she understood why he needed to, and then she validated his mixed emotions. It's undeniable they have a bond that he doesn’t share with the others.

I've also mentioned before how I don’t think Damon rebuilding Emory’s gazebo was entirely about Will, but also a thank you to Emory for what she’s done for him and an apology for letting Will burn it. Not that he would have changed anything, but that he knew it was wrong and let Will do it anyway (as he said, he tried to stop Will). Building the gazebo might have been a form of therapy, since he built it while Will was away, but who knows.

At the same time… what was Damon doing that morning taking care of the lights? The night after his wedding, he would rather be doing chores than be with Winter? Did he tire Winter out, and while she was asleep, he thought might as well get something checked off my to do list? He has such control issues that he can’t let someone else touch the gazebo? Damon doing such a menial task when they probably had a cleaning crew (I mean, who set up the lights and the rows of chairs for the guests?) seems like such a random thing, and totally done so that Emory and Damon could talk.

Anyway, I’m off topic. By this point in the series, it feels that Damon’s lost his bite, which is annoying because PD is still trying to sell us on him being the most terrifying. I’d much rather we go with the idea that Damon is healing and he doesn’t need the bite he had before protect himself. That happiness is something he can actually feel now, and it’s okay that he’s changing.

Or alternatively, if Damon were still mean, that would be fine too. If that’s just what his personality is and it never mattered what level his happiness was at, he was always going to be mean and scary and crazy, I could live with that. But this mix of he’s the hardest of them all but also the gentlest, best dad, and also the funniest and also the most Mostest Character ever is hard to swallow sometimes. Pick one.

People around her was the one who assumed that she was embarrassed.

I might be forgetting a few instances, but I think in the past, Emory got embarrassed when she was caught doing something. Example, the times she was caught watching people – ex: kids in the hallway; Will in the wrestling room. In these examples, though, she was caught by people she thought were better than her. When she was caught by Trevor, who wasn’t well liked by other, similar to her, she didn’t have the same reaction.

By the train scene, she’s already come to the conclusion that none of these people are better than her. They all suck in one way or another. She has nothing to be ashamed of.

(I think a hard part on reasoning this way is that they act like they’re “owning” that they’re horrible people, while they’re actively denying it. Or is that just me?)

Funny because i feel like damon carried some shame there too

I don’t know if I would say he carried any shame for trying to keep Will and Emory apart. He was trying to keep Will under his control, and Emory had the ability to take Will away. Damon wasn’t ready for that. I don’t think he even cared whether Emory had good intentions for Will or not – in fact, her having good intentions was worse for him. If she could make Will happy, what use would Will have for him anymore? It would ruin their bond.

I also don’t think he cared how she viewed him. He didn’t need her in his group, so her opinion meant nothing.

But I think Emory impressed him. She was unwilling to submit to him in the shower. I’m sure there were plenty of other girls who set their eyes on one specific horseman, but settled for another as if they were interchangeable. But Emory wasn’t even responding to Will and yet she wouldn’t settle for anyone else. And then the whole murder thing...

My point is, Damon knew why he was did what he did, and I don't think he regretted it. It is what it is, he was who he was. The past isn't anything he can change, so why feel anything towards it.

For a character as selfish as damon, it's impossible to say that he was only angry at the girls because they made his guys unhappy, because damon thrive around people he loves and want to care for. Have you thought of this possibilty?

I actually think he was angry at the girls because they had the possibility of making them happy, and the idea that that happiness could take them away and they wouldn't need him around anymore.

On the opposite side of that and more to your point, the conversation between Will and Damon on the cliffs comes to mind. Damon was upset that Will was despondent and distracted. The fact that Emory had the power to do this to Will irritated him. I think he thought only he should be able to make Will feel this way, but maybe it was just that Emory made Will unhappy and he was mad about it. He goes on to talk about his future wife and children, making clear he already had plans for Winter, but that he wasn’t going to let that distract him from the now.

It seemed to say to me that Damon didn’t care who Will ended up with, as long as they submitted to Will and served the horsemen's greater agenda. Emory was never going to submit and Will would spend the rest of his life chasing after the loss, and that pissed Damon off.

And then, like you said, it is when Damon starts seeing the women as having their own power instead of tools, and how their power actually elevates his friends instead of weakens them, that he can start admitting that what he wanted all along was to be wanted, and all of this was just to stay close to the people he cared about.

But maybe I’m wrong.

I think it just escalated him to the person who he was always meant to be and who he wanted to be outside of what he thought he should be.

Same. I think prison probably brought out the worst in Kai, but it was something that was already there. Kai’s the type of character that spent his whole life keeping the two versions of himself separate, but he would switch between the two frequently and that brought a sense of balance. But when he went into prison, he couldn’t find that balance. He had to be all of one version of himself, and that version became more twisted the longer he was in.

He has the potential to be just as terrifying as Damon if he would find harmony between the two sides. If a little bit of the version that was in prison still existed, and instead of hating himself for it, kept it just under the surface, right there behind the mask of friendliness. It would be a nice counter balance to Damon, who keeps his crazy on the surface and how devoted he is underneath.

(and ohhhh this is an interesting thought, because it’s obvious that Damon and Kai were always supposed to be two sides of the same coin, but this means that Michael and Will could serve the same purpose. And that thought brings to mind the conversation they had about devil’s night in Will’s truck. Will suggested the Cove and Michael rejected it. One is out of control, one is always in control. One has drive and ambition, one just floats through life. But both find something in the other that they need. And the following it up with Michael naming his son after Will. Might be something there… as Will said, the four of them create a perfect storm.)

A bit different than emmy, where we dont see much of struggle of her admitting what she likes or hiding her likes in private,

I do like this comparison, because while I think that Kai always did struggle a bit. He fully acknowledged that side of himself but he didn’t like sharing it with a lot of people. He struggled with not being the “good son”. Whereas Emory didn’t always accept that side of herself, but once she did, there wasn’t a thought of hiding it away. She just doesn’t open up to a lot of people in general, but she also doesn’t pretend to be anything but what she is.

he did exist behind a lot of lies and mysteries that he cooked up, even from himself, sometimes just for he fun of it, just because he thought they justify his likings, very similar to will, but will was more self-aware than kai.

I do agree. I think Will was aware that he was hiding his most authentic version behind lies, while Kai was desperately trying to believe the self that he presented was his true self, or at least a part of it.

however, out of everyone, inckuding side chars, the only char that i still dont know to type is Rika. Like wtf is she? I feel like PD is making her to be everything and now her char seems confusing.

 Rika is bit all over the place and suffers from being PD’s perfect princess.

Likewise, I still don’t know Kai well enough to fully analyze his character to that degree. It’s funny, because he likes being a mystery to people and he’s certainly succeeded with me!

I’m happy we’re discussing it though. He was my favorite in Corrupt and I was so sad to lose interest in him during Hideaway. I think the potential he has is huge.