#Original quote by Steven Wright

[vent-rat]

Presenting Katie Wolfe, a.k.a Copycat!

@homegrown-blorbo-garden

I suck at drawing without a base, so here's the references I used!

First one I genuinely have no clue. I drew it like 4 or 5 years ago in my high school-provided subscription of Photoshop so I do not have the files. I searched up something along the lines of "superhero pose drawing reference female" though.

2nd!

3rd!

4th I used HeroForge as a reference.

Now that the art showcase is complete, I shall tell her story! Well, part of it. You see Katie is part of an entire multiverse I created called FiveOh Comics. At my count right now, there's 285 characters in this universe (plus an rp Discord server which I can link to anyone interested in joining). There's a ton of storylines all over the universe, and Copycat in particular has an entire 100 episode-10 season show I'm writing about her that I want to get officially produced, but I don't have time to go through all of it today, so here's the essentials!

Katie Wolfe is an anomaly, born with superhuman powers that manifested at 10. She could copy any actions she saw other people take, so long as she physically had the capability to do so. She could also chameleon herself to look like other people, or change her own appearance. Worth mentioning also that she's bisexual and polyamorous.

She's the daughter of Timberwolf (a.k.a Theresa Wolfe), one of the most famous superheroes in the world and the leader of POW! (Protectors Of the World), the first superhero team ever. Theresa's also the smartest person in the world, and runs the company Wolfe Sciences, dedicated to creating products that advance humanity's capabilities. I'll talk about Theresa again in a later post when I've drawn a not-shitty picture of her in hero mode.

Trying to follow in her mother's footsteps, Katie helped found Alpha Sentinel, the most popular hero team in the world, since it had two former members of POW! leading it and never seemed to lose. In the fight that formed the team, Katie met a shapeshifter from a doomed civilization in the core of the Earth, who'd been jettisoned to the surface to save her. Confused and angry, she lashed out, until the soon-to-be team pacified her and they slunk off. Katie later tracked her down and brought them to her mother. After a while of acclimating to the surface and its society, she took a human form, naming herself Emily and choosing to stay with Katie and Theresa. Theresa officially adopted her, and she became Katie's sister.

After 3 successful years of Alpha Sentinel's career, tragedy struck. One member was trapped within his own mind, one was killed, a third was traumatized so bad she quarantined herself in her room for nearly a year, and a fourth was hospitalized, leaving only Katie and Stingray (aka Steven Raye, Theresa's best friend) still active heroes. Of course, though, Katie was not unaffected by this event, and she retreated into a shell for over a month, right up to the start of the Copycat series, the events of which I won't spoil.

Over the course of the show, however, she deals with her own emotional scars and brings together friends, even saving the old AS member who was trapped in his own mind, and created a new Alpha Sentinel, consisting of herself, Stingray, the previously mentioned member of AS, Riptide, Timberwolf, her sister Emily, calling herself Goop Girl, her best friend Cassie Wright, or Libra, and a wizard named Stardust.

Oh, also there's a strong chance she's a daughter of Athena. At the very least, she's been blessed, as Athena has allowed her to summon Aegis and Astrape.

I'll get to all of these characters in due time, of course, but for now, that's Katie's story! Here's some quotes from her for good measure.

Katie: I live in fear of John Cena brushing my mouth like Colgate.

Katie: Hey, y’know how some people get birds released at their weddings?

Emily: …yes?

Katie: I want Cassowaries released at my wedding.

Theresa: "Katie, if you ever utter the phrase 'copyright incringement' in my house again, I'm kicking you out."

Katie, dying: I’m sorry… you know I had to do it to ‘em…

Katie: You're not a copycat. Nothing has ever been done the way you do it before. Everything you do is special and unique to you.

[sizzlinglightsoul]

Humorous Quotes to Brighten Your Day: 900+ Words of Laughter

Humor is the spice of life, and what better way to embrace it than with some witty and humorous quotes? Whether you’re looking to lighten the mood, find a chuckle-worthy caption for your social media, or simply add a touch of fun to your day, these quotes deliver. Here’s a guide to some of the best humorous quotes and how you can incorporate them into everyday life.

Subtasks to Explore Humorous Quotes

1. What Makes a Quote Humorous?

Humorous quotes stand out because of their cleverness, relatability, and unexpected twists. Here are the key elements:

Wordplay: Using language in a playful way to spark laughter.

Irony: Highlighting the unexpected or contradictory.

Universal Truths: Relatable observations about life, relationships, and the human experience.

For example, Oscar Wilde’s classic: "I can resist everything except temptation."

2. Popular Categories of Humorous Quotes

Humorous quotes come in various flavors. Here are some popular categories:

Life Quotes: "Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth."

Workplace Humor: "I’m not lazy; I’m on energy-saving mode."

Relationships: "Marriage is like a walk in the park—Jurassic Park."

Parenting: "I’ve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me."

3. Top Sources of Humorous Quotes

Where do the funniest quotes originate? Some come from great minds, while others are from pop culture or social media. Here are some sources:

Authors and Playwrights: Oscar Wilde, Mark Twain, Dorothy Parker.

Comedians: Ellen DeGeneres, George Carlin, Tina Fey.

Movies and TV Shows: "Friends," "The Office," "Parks and Recreation."

Everyday Observations: Quotes from everyday life often carry the most humor.

4. How to Use Humorous Quotes in Everyday Life

Humorous quotes aren’t just for laughs—they’re versatile and can brighten any situation. Here are some ideas:

Social Media Posts: Use them as captions or tweets.

Motivational Boosts: Add humor to your workspace or personal journal.

Conversation Starters: Break the ice with a witty remark.

Gift Cards: Personalize your message with a funny quote.

5. Classic Humorous Quotes to Get You Started

Here are some timeless quotes guaranteed to make you smile:

"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes." — Jim Carrey

"Why don’t they make the whole plane out of the black box?" — Steven Wright

"I’m not arguing; I’m just explaining why I’m right." — Unknown

"If at first, you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you." — Steven Wright

6. Crafting Your Own Humorous Quotes

If you’re feeling creative, try coming up with your own witty lines. Here’s how:

Start with Truth: Think of a situation you’ve experienced.

Add a Twist: Find an ironic or unexpected angle.

Keep It Concise: Brevity is the soul of wit.

Example: "Mondays are proof that weekends are too short to be true."

7. Why Humorous Quotes Are So Popular

Humorous quotes resonate with people because they:

Relieve Stress: Laughter is a natural stress reliever.

Connect People: Sharing humor builds bonds.

Provide Perspective: They remind us not to take life too seriously.

8. Finding the Best Humorous Quotes Online

Here are some resources to find more funny quotes:

Quote Websites: BrainyQuote, Goodreads, and Pinterest.

Social Media: Follow humor accounts on Instagram, Twitter, or TikTok.

Books: Collections of humorous essays or memoirs by comedians.

Conclusion

Humorous quotes are a simple yet powerful way to bring joy and perspective into your life. Whether you’re looking for a quick laugh, an icebreaker, or a moment of levity, these clever one-liners and witty observations have you covered. So, embrace the humor, share the laughs, and keep finding new ways to see the lighter side of life. Browse more:

[incorrect-the-witcher-quotes]

Dijkstra: I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.

[nikkoliferous]

Confirmation of Joe Biden’s election victory and his looming inauguration as the next President of the United States has elicited a joyful response from large swathes of the press and across social media. Yet for those people who are aware of Biden’s politics and record, beyond the spurious ‘nice guy’ image projected by the media, and therefore understand what the implications of his victory are likely to be, witnessing the mainstream reaction to it has been a profoundly alienating experience. This feeling of isolation has been exacerbated by the fact that legitimate criticism of Biden and his running mate, Kamala Harris, has frequently been met with personal invective, as though it is an attack on the very being of those who are currently celebrating their win.

As Devyn Springer has explained, ‘the gutting of political education and virality of capitalist miseducation means that people offering valid criticism, analysis, and reproval are likened to “hating” and “not letting people enjoy things” in the stunted Amerikan [sic] political imaginary.’ Lamentably, the absence of critical thinking and political imagination in the US is also a feature of political discourse in the UK. Contrary to the idea that feeling no joy regarding the prospect of a Biden-Harris administration is driven by a mean-spirited desire to spoil the happiness of others, it is in fact a sentiment that springs ultimately from love and solidarity – a crucial distinction that Steven Salaita recently expressed with characteristic eloquence. The inability to feel any joy at Biden winning, even if simultaneously relieved to see Trump lose, is borne out of compassion for all the past (and future) victims of both Biden’s personal actions, and of the neo-liberal and imperialist politics that he so perfectly embodies.

It should be plainly stated that by any meaningful and honest measure, Biden is a monster who has caused an incalculable amount of suffering over his many decades as a senior official of the US empire. Given the length of Biden’s career, a comprehensive rap sheet requires a book-length study, but his ‘highlights’ include his central role in drafting a number of deeply racist pieces of legislation (including the infamous 1994 Crime Bill) that both exacerbated and consolidated the mass incarceration of Black Americans, and legislation that went on to be passed largely unchanged as the Patriot Act of 2001 that gutted civil liberties in the US; his prominent role in lobbying the Senate and the American public for the war on Iraq as Chairman of the Senate’s Foreign Relations Committee; and his ‘unconditional, career-long commitment to Israel’ that has seen him develop close friendships with a number of fellow war criminals including Benjamin Netanyahu and the late Ariel Sharon, at whose funeral he delivered a eulogy. In short, Biden is a racist authoritarian at home and an enthusiastic and unapologetic imperialist abroad. On environmental issues, in spite of the hopes that liberals are already investing in him, Biden is little better. During the campaign he repeatedly announced that he will not ban fracking and his adviser on energy issues, who served as Energy Secretary under Obama, is a notorious lobbyist for the fossil fuel industry. It is alarming to note too that Ezekiel Emanuel, a member of Biden’s recently announced Coronavirus taskforce, has argued that life is not worth living beyond the age of 75.

In addition to the long list of sexual assault allegations he has faced,  something that is rarely publicised or discussed outside of pro-Trump media, is the deeply disturbing fact that even when the cameras are rolling, Biden appears to be incapable of not smelling, kissing, groping and otherwise acting wildly inappropriately with women and girls with whom he comes into contact. Such is the incredible power of the media to continually re-invent and sanitise public reputations, that virtually all of this lamentable record is simply cast aside and intentionally obscured. Instead, Biden is regularly portrayed in a highly favourable light as a ‘decent, empathic man’ who supposedly stands in stark contrast to Trump. The truth, as articulated plainly in a recent interview by Evo Morales – the former President of Bolivia deposed in a US coup in November 2019 – there is really little difference between the two men and the parties they represent, except for that Trump’s racism and fascism is more explicit. All this does not even address the other elephant in the room: namely that Biden is evidently undergoing some form of cognitive decline, which, on multiple occasions throughout the campaign period, has left him unable to form coherent sentences and repeatedly slurred basic words and phrases.

It is telling, if not surprising, that many of those who have thus far publicly celebrated the election results with the most glee are those liberals who in their own words, cannot wait to stop caring about politics again. It was Trump’s overt racism, crude style and unpredictable theatrics on Twitter and elsewhere – the cause of such embarrassment to them and the US liberal establishment as a whole – that they opposed, not the actual content and results of his policies, so many of which were in fact a direct continuation of policies inherited from the Obama-Biden Administration, including the caging of migrant children and the much-derided ‘Muslim ban’. In fact, Trump’s recognition of Jerusalem as the capital of Israel, one of his most criticised decisions internationally, was only legally possible as a result of earlier legislation that Biden himself voted for and was later supported by Obama. It is evident that for many of those who formed the so-called ‘resistance’ to Trump, their opposition to his presidency was not driven by the harm that it inflicted, but rather by the damage it caused to America’s reputation globally and the subsequent embarrassment and discomfort they felt.

A widespread concern among elements of the US establishment, especially early on in Trump’s Presidency, was that he would make good on some of the anti-war rhetoric he had occasionally deployed during his campaign and not be sufficiently imperialist in outlook. It is for this reason that Trump received perhaps the most unanimously positive coverage in the media on the day on which he authorised air strikes on Syria. No such fears exist with Biden, who, as though such reassurance was required, has repeatedly gone out of his way during the campaign to demonstrate his hawkish credentials on a host of foreign policy issues including his stance on China, Syria and Iran. Accordingly, The Guardian has already called on Biden to ‘reassert America’s role as the global problem-solver’ because under Trump ‘the “indispensable nation” disappeared when it was needed most.’ A sentiment that is a perfect illustration of John Pilger’s maxim that ‘the task of liberal realists is to ensure that western imperialism is interpreted as crisis management, rather than the cause of the crisis and its escalation.’

In essence, liberals are fawning over Biden solely by virtue of him not being as obscenely and openly racist as Trump. To do so in spite of his disastrous record and in the absence of him running on any meaningful policy platform or alternative vision brings to mind C. Wright Mills’ scathing assessment of liberalism from his work The Marxists (1962), which is relevant enough to quote at length:

“As a set of theories – or better, of assumptions about man, society, history – liberalism today is at a dead end. The optative mood has so thoroughly taken over that liberals often appear out of touch with the going realities. That is one reason it is so difficult to sort out distinctively liberal theories as such. Often failing to recognize facts that cry out to be recognized, liberalism is irrelevant to much that is happening in much of the world. Liberal ways of looking at these facts too often become mannerisms by which liberals avoid considering the structural conditions of social life and the need to change them. In fact, liberals have no convincing view of the structure of society as a whole – other than the now vague notion of it as some kind of a big balance. They have no firm sense of the history of our times and of their nation’s.”

Under Trump’s leadership, most notably at the height of the vicious repression of the Black Lives Matters protests in May and June of this year, the superficial mask of American liberalism dropped entirely, exposing the ugly fascism at its core. Biden’s win is undoubtedly the start of a concerted effort to lift that mask back up, restore America’s image and get back to the business of imperialism disguised as ‘global problem-solving’. Trump’s overt racism will be replaced with the more refined, tacit variety at which the Democratic Party excels, and his candid admissions regarding the true motivations behind US military action substituted with statesman-like messaging about humanitarian intervention and the international community’s ‘responsibility to protect’. That Biden’s Vice-President will be Kamala Harris, a half Black, half South Asian-origin woman – regardless of the fact her politics are as reactionary as his – will also be used to project an ostensibly progressive image of the incoming administration. All those who are committed to opposing all forms of racism and imperialism, of the refined variety or otherwise, must resist these dishonest attempts to portray a Biden win as anything more than an administrative reshuffle within the bi-partisan management of a genocidal empire that, whoever is President, represents a grave danger to its own people and the future of everyone else on this planet.

[enabledarmy]

Bored in quarantine?

Want some good movies to watch but don't want to support the careers of racists, r!pists and general jerks?

Worry not! There are plenty of good movies out there that you might not know about

If you liked:

Baby Driver

Watch:

Scott Pilgrim vs the World

Why?

They have the same editors (Paul Machliss and Jonathan Amos), director of cinematography (Bill Pope) and the same director (Edgar Wright) so that cool style and pace is there that a lot of people love about Baby Driver

And if you loved the music aspect of Baby Driver, Scott Pilgrim Vs The World is full of it! The soundtrack is awesome and includes original songs written for the film (and performed in it) including 'Black Sheep' by Metric, and you can even listen to songs by the bands in the film on Spotify. Another great addition to the album is 'It's getting boring by the sea' by Blood Red Shoes.

Here's a gif that showcases the classic whip-pan that Wright's work often uses so well

Note: Given the context that prompted this post, I feel I should make you aware that at the start of the film, Scott (22) is dating 17-year old Knives. Although they only ever hold hands, are never alone together and her parents are aware and ok with it, please don't watch if this will be triggering for you. To give an example of the nature of their relationship, Knives wants to kiss Scott and says "I've never kissed a guy before". Instead of kissing her or initiating any contact, Scott responds "Hey... me neither". Scott decides he's too old for her but doesn't handle this particularly well, not wanting to upset her (don't worry- he gets called out for it) She remains a key character throughout the film and really develops as the story goes on. Bonus points for having her own arc and not being there as the foil for the white love interest. I love you Knives!

I also love the female characters in general they're so different but cool here are some gifs ok bye

Attack the Block

Why?

Attack the Block has the same composer as Baby Driver (Steven Price), and is also edited by Jonathan Amos (Baby Driver, Scott Pilgrim vs the World) and co-produced by Edgar Wright.

It stars John Boyega, which is of course a reason itself to watch it, especially because supporting his work makes it harder for Hollywood to drop him (if you didn't know, he is a vocal leader of the BLM movement in the UK and so stated he might lose his career). He is also just a good actor and general good person which seems rare these days.

Its cast were mostly unknown at the time, and a lot of the dialogue is based on quotes from real teenagers- in the same demographic as the characters- spoken to during research. Joe Cornish (writer/director) also discussed with the actors any changes they wanted to their characters' dialogue and the last drafts were influenced by their choices.

This is especially important as the movie also deals with race and class issues, as well as treatment of black British people and people of colour by authority

I won't write a lot about it since I don't know it as well as I do Scott Pilgrim, but will be rewatching soon and if you need to know if there's any subjects that might be triggering for you check the website doesthedogdie

I'll just leave this quote from the film here:

"They arrest us for nothing anyway"

"No, I reckon yeah, I reckon, the Feds sent them anyway. Government probably bred those things to kill black boys. First they send in drugs, then they sent guns and now they're sending monsters in to kill us. They don't care man. We ain't killing each other fast enough. So they decided to speed up the process"

Cast members you may also recognise!

Jodie Whittaker (Doctor Who)

Frank Drameh (The Flash, Legends of Tomorrow)

I can do a pt.2, if there's particular films/actors you want alternatives to let me know 💜

[goldchery-blog]

i’ve been tagged by @someoddwriter! thank you! for the oc questions we’ll go w umbra. they’re not my favorite except they are

list five basic facts for your oc:

likes to fight. will fight you. catch these hands

but hates every other form of exercise

pulls an original trilogy han solo and pretends not to care but actually cares a lot, cares so much holy shit

is actually illiterate. no one bothered to teach them to read or write so they’re largely dependent on art while tagging

prefers blondes.

if your oc could have any superpower, which would it be and why? they’d swap their powers for the ability to fly in a heartbeat

post a pic/gif that describes your oc.

summarize your wip in ten words or less: knock off xmen host anarchy hour

do you have any villains in your story? i sure do. they’re awful. the daughter’s dad is one. a REAL piece of work. also one’s i can’t say bc spoilers.

what’s easier for you to write, dialogue or description? definitely dialogue

do you have a favorite writing-related quote? omy email signature in middle school was a quote by a guy called steven wright (don’t know who that is now) - “i'm writing a book. i've got the page numbers done."

if you could assign your story one song, what would it be? i’ll give two because i can. exile by hurts + leave my body by florence and the machine.

where do you get inspiration from? uhhhh other people’s writing for actual writing and music and art for ideas.

do you tend to overwrite or underwrite in your first draft? underwrite, but i feel like i have a fair explanation in that i usually go back and add more symbolic to scenes once the whole work is fleshed out.

i tag @nathanielbooks, @valhallxs, @katywritesbooks, @forlornraven, and @yvesdot! (as usual, feel free to abstain)

[aintshitbiz]

Marilyn McCoo & Billy Davis Jr. "Blackbird" Beatles Cover (Video)

*A quote from Marilyn McCoo & Billy Davis Jr on “Blackbird" “Blackbird, fly ... even when the bodies of our babies are shot down or choked to death ... their spirits continue to fight to equality. Those of us that are still here in the nest of life will continue this peaceful war for justice. Over the front of the Supreme Court, is carved in marble: Equality For All. Our question is, do we have it? Since we don’t, when do we get it? Just the two of us have been waiting over 70 years. It’s time ... past time, for us to turn this around and realize that Civil Rights are Human Rights. We thank Questlove, EE1, BMG and our Producer, Nic Mendoza, for giving us a platform at this age, to use our artistry as part of the activism we’ve always practiced. When we began working on Blackbird, we were deeply concerned about what was happening in our country. It felt as though we were moving backwards, versus marching to progress. When we began singing as individual artists, and during our Original 5th Dimension days, we were in the heat of the Civil Rights Movement. We lived through the usual indignities ... an 8’ x 8’ cross burner on our lawn ... police pulling a gun on Billy thinking he was robbing a home we owned ... we had the memories of Emmett Till ... the assassinations of Dr. King ... Malcolm X ... and so many other people ... but today, we are particularly heartbroken and focused on our blackbirds being slaughtered and shot, so that our babies cannot return to the nest of home. During the Chauvin Trial, over the horror of what happened to George Floyd ... while that’s going on, a few blocks away, a 20-year-old father named Daunte Wright is shot by a policewoman with 26 years of experience, who says she don’t know her gun from her taser. Shocked. Today, we see video of a 13-year-old baby blackbird, Adam Toledo, shot while running away from “peace” officers? How and what can we say to these families? We have a grown son, Steven, so we fear this reality. Only God and action can help us now.

We must never forget that Blackbird was written following the 16th Street Baptist Church in Birmingham, Alabama being bombed ... which killed four babies, Cynthia, Addie Mae, Carole and Carol Denise. The song, and the entire album, is about Civil Rights, which are human rights. We needed to use our art as activism and let everyone know: we can all be blackbirds for each other, and wage a peaceful war for every human being to be treated with fairness, dignity, and the right to live without a daily fear of harassment and even death. Blackbird is an expression of the reality we are living today. Look at what's happening this very week. The killings continue. When a blackbird leaves our mother's nest, one day, it will not return. In 2021, mothers throughout our country live in the fear that our blackbirds may prematurely not be able to return to the nest of home, because of bigotry and violence… Blackbird, is dedicated to the life and humanity of every blackbird, whether living now or lost in battle,” said Marilyn & Billy.

“Billy is a Black man, it doesn’t matter where we live or what we’ve done, until Billy gets home, my heart is in my throat,” said Marilyn.

Marilyn McCoo & Billy Davis Jr Social Media handles: Instagram: @McCooDavis Twitter: @McCooDavis Facebook: facebook.com/McCooDavis

[aberrantanomaly03]

The Sanders Sides as quotes that I have found:

Logan: “People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do” - Isaac Asimov (Alternate: “What’s another word for ‘thesaurus’?” - Steven Wright)

Virgil: “There cannot be a crisis next week, my schedule is full” - Henry Kissinger (Alternate: “I’m sorry, if you were right, I’d agree with you” - Robin Williams)

Patton: “Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?” - Robin Williams (Alternate, slightly sadder one that makes me think of Moving On PT. 1: “I had everything I’d hoped for, but I wasn’t being honest about myself. It was strange: The people who loved me for being funny suddenly didn’t like me for being.. *me*” - Ellen DeGeneres)

Roman: “Creativity is the process of having original ideas that have value. It is a process; it is not random.” - Ken Robinson (Alternate: “Negativity is the enemy of creativity” - David Lynch)

And I know I kinda broke away from the humorous aspect for Roman, but.. I just couldn’t find any that really sounded like him..

[delspanda]

Minnesota Bid Bonds

The listed below post is a great intro to bid bonds. Bid bonds, as you are conscious, are bonds utilized in the building and construction market. These bonds guarantee that if somebody quotes on a job, and is awarded the agreement, then they will move forward with performing under the terms of the agreement.

See the below article for more great details. You can see the original short article here: https://swiftbonds.com/bid-bond/minnesota-2/

Minnesota Bid Bonds

What is a Bid Bond in Minnesota?

A bid bond is one of the types of surety bonds, which guarantees that the bidder will enter into the agreement and complete the contract according to its terms. The bid bond provides assurance to the project owner that the bidder has the ability and wherewithal to finish the job once you are selected after the bidding process. The simple reason is that you need one so that you get the contract. But the larger question is why are more owners/developers requiring a surety bid bond? The basic answer is risk. Given the uncertainty of the marketplace, which includes long-term contractors closing their doors, to municipalities filing bankruptcy (or just slow paying), has led to owners being afraid that their contractors will be unable to finish the work. So, they require a some protection.

Just fill out our bond application here and email it to gary@swiftbonds.com – click here to get our Minnesota Bid Bond Application

A bid bond is issued as part of a bid by a surety bond company to the project owner. The owner is then assures that the winning bidder will take on the contract under the terms at which they bid.

Most bid bonds contain a bid percentage (usually five (5%) or ten (10%) percent, is forfeited if you don’t accept the job).

How much does a Bid Bond Cost in Minnesota?

Swiftbonds does not charge for a bid bond (with two exceptions, see below). The reason that we don’t charge for a bid bond is that we will charge for the P&P bond if you win the contract. The cost of a bid bond can vary widely depending on the amount of coverage that is required (see below).

Two exceptions for bid bond charges: 1) We do charge for Overnight fees 2) We will charge you if there is NOT going to be a contract bond.

How much do bonds cost in MN?

Bond prices fluctuate based on the job size (that is, it’s based on the cost of the underlying contract). The cost of a bond is estimated through a couple of back-of-the-envelope calculations. In general, the cost is approximately three percent (3%) for jobs under $800,000 and then the percentage is lower as the contract amount increases. We work diligently to find the lowest premiums possible in the state of Minnesota. Please call us today at (913) 286-6501. We’ll find you the very best rate possible for your maintenance bond or completion bond. Things that can affect this pricing are the perceived risk of the job, the financial position of the entity being bonded, plus other factors.

Bond Amount Needed Fee 2-3% >$800,000 1.5-3% >$1.500,000 1-3%

These rates are for Merit clients, Standard rates are higher

How do I get a Bid Bond in Minnesota?

We make it easy to get a contract bid bond. Just click here to get our Minnesota Bid Bond Application. Fill it out and then email it and the Minnesota bid specs/contract documents to gary@swiftbonds.com or fax to 855-433-4192.

You can also call us at (913) 286-6501. We thoroughly review each application for bid and P&P bonds and then submit it to the surety that we believe will provide the best surety bond for your company. We have a very high success rate in getting our clients bid bonds at the best rates possible.

What is a Minnesota Bid Bond?

A bid bond is a bond that assures that you will accept the work if you win the contract. The bid fee (usually five or ten percent) is a penalty that is paid when you win the bid, but then back out of doing the work.

Find a Bid Bond near Me

Typically, a bid bond and payment bond are done together in the same contract by the surety. This way, the owner of the project is assured that the project can be completed pursuant to the terms of the contract and that it will not be liened by any contractor. The bond is risk security for the benefit of the owner.

Who Gets the Bid Bond?

The general contractor is the entity that obtains the bond. It is for the benefit of the owner (or in the case of government contract work, the governmental entity). It’s the general contractor that has to apply for the bond and be underwritten before the bid bond is written by the surety. This is also known as bonding a business.

We provide bid bonds in each of the following counties:

Aitkin Anoka Becker Beltrami Benton Big Stone Blue Earth Brown Carlton Carver Cass Chippewa Chisago Clay Clearwater Cook Cottonwood Crow Wing Dakota Dodge Douglas Faribault Fillmore Freeborn Goodhue Grant Hennepin Houston Hubbard Isanti Itasca Jackson Kanabec Kandiyohi Kittson Koochiching Lac Qui Parle Lake Lake Of The Wood Le Sueur Lincoln Lyon Mahnomen Marshall Martin McLeod Meeker Mille Lacs Morrison Mower Murray Nicollet Nobles Norman Olmsted Otter Tail Pennington Pine Pipestone Polk Pope Ramsey Red Lake Redwood Renville Rice Rock Roseau St. Louis Scott Sherburne Sibley Stearns Steele Stevens Swift Todd Traverse Wabasha Wadena Waseca Washington Watonwan Wilkin Winona Wright Yellow Medicine

And Cities: Minneapolis Saint Paul Duluth St. Cloud Bloomington Mankato Eagan Burnsville Edina Eden Prairie

See our Mississippi Bid Bond page here.

More on Surety Bid Bonds https://swiftbonds.com/bid-bond/.

Learning More About Applying and Finding The Right Bid Bonds For Your Needs

Bid Bonds can be complicated to apply for, especially if you don’t understand how they work. Most individuals consider this as insurance, but it’s actually a type of guarantee that the principal will perform their work properly for the obliged. Insurance companies usually offer a Surety Bid Bond, but you cannot call it insurance because its function is different. Most individuals will require you to get a bid bond before they consider your services as it is a form of guarantee to them.

If you’d like to consider applying for a bid bond or other bonds, you must understand how they work. We will provide you information on the importance of Bid Bonds and how they actually work.

The Importance Of A Surety Bid Bond

Bid Bonds will always be in demand to protect the public because it is a kind of assurance that your obligations and duties will be completed. Most states require you to get a license surety bond to ensure that your company will adhere to state code and laws and you get a contract bond to guarantee that a public project will be completed. A Surety Bid Bond is meant for the obliged since they are the ones that are being protected, but it will also benefit you because the clients will trust you and your work. There are thousands of bonds right now and the type of bond that you are trying to find will depend upon your situation.

The Primary Purpose Of A Surety Bid Bond

Bid Bonds are a three-party agreement between the principal, the obliged and the surety company. The principal is the employer or company which will perform the work and the obliged is known as the project owner. Construction companies will almost always be required by law to acquire Bid Bonds if they’re chosen for a public project. The government will require a construction company to get a host of bonds before they work on a certain project. The bond will ensure that the sub-contractors and the other workers will be paid even if the contractor defaults. The contractor will cover the losses, but when they reach their limit, the duty will fall to the surety company.

How To Apply For A Surety Bid Bond

Bid Bonds are provided by insurance providers, but there are standalone surety businesses that focus on these products. A surety company must be licensed by a state Department of Insurance.

It won’t be easy to apply for a bond since the applicants will have to go through a process that is comparable to applying for a loan. The bond underwriters will look into the credit profile of the applicant, their financial history and other key factors.

It means that there is a chance that you won’t be approved for a bid bond, particularly if the bond underwriters see something from your credit rating that makes them think you will be a risk.

How Much Will You Spend?

You cannot put an exact cost on a Surety Bid Bond because the cost is affected by numerous factors like the bond type, bond amount, where it will likely be issued, contractual risk, credit history of the applicant and more. There are thousands of different bonds available today and the cost will depend on the bond that you want to get. The amount of the bond will be a factor because you could select a $10,000 bond or a $25,000 bond or higher.

If you already have a credit history of 700 and above or very near this number, you can be eligible for the standard bonding market and you will need to pay 1 to 4 percent of the Surety Bid Bond amount. It means that if you obtain a $10,000 bond, you only have to pay $100 to $400 for the interest.

Your Application For A Bid Bond Could Be Rejected

There is a possibility that your bid bond request will be refused by the surety company since it will depend upon the information that they can get from the background check. If the surety company thinks that it will be a risk to give you a bid bond, they will deny your application. Your credit history is one of the most important factors to be approved for a bid bond because if you have a bad credit history, it shows a risk of default on the bond.

You CAN get a bid bond even if you have a bad credit score, but most likely you will pay an interest rate upwards of 10 to 20 percent.

If you plan to get a Surety Bid Bond, make certain you understand what is required prior to deciding. It is not easy to apply for, but if you know more about them, it will be a little bit easier to be approved.

A Much Deeper Take A Look At Quote Bonds in Building And Construction If granted, a Quote Bond is a type of surety bond used to make sure that a specialist bidding on a task or job will get in into the contract with the obligee.

A Quote Bond is provided in the quantity of the agreement quote, with the similar requirements as that of a Performance Bond.

All About Bid Bonds in Building The origins of our business was carefully connected with the provision of efficiency bonds to the contracting market. A little higher than one a century earlier, the federal authorities grew to become alarmed worrying the high failure fee among the private companies it was using to perform public construction projects. It discovered that the private specialist typically was insolvent when the task was granted, or grew to become insolvent earlier than the challenge was completed. Appropriately, the federal government was continually entrusted incomplete initiatives, and the taxpayers had been forced to cover the additional prices occurring from the contractor's default.

The standing of your surety firm is important, since it guarantees you that when you have troubles or if worse involves worst you'll have a trusted partner to turn to and get help from. We work only with A-rated and T-listed companies, most likely the most dependable corporations in the market.

Generally no, they are separate. Bid bonds mechanically turn into performance bonds in case you are awarded the agreement.

What Is A Construction Surety Bond? The origins of our company was thoroughly connected with the arrangement of performance bonds to the contracting market. Even if some tasks do not require cost and efficiency bonds, you will need to get bonded finally because the bulk of public efforts do require the bonds. The longer a small specialist waits to get bonded, the more resilient it will be because there will not be a observe report of fulfilling the mandatory requirements for bonding and carrying out bonded work.

The only restrict is the biggest bond you may get for one particular job. The aggregate limit is the entire amount of bonded work readily available you perhaps can have without delay.

The Importance Of Bid Bonds near You Arms, generators, radio towers, tree removal, computers, softward, emergency alarm, ornamental work, scaffolding, water towers, lighting, and resurfacing of current roads/paved areas. Bid bonds additionally function an extra warranty for task owners that a bidding contractor or subcontractor is certified to execute the task they're bidding on. There are 2 causes for this.

https://swiftbonds.com/bid-bond/minnesota-2/

[uhhhcool]

Minnesota Bid Bonds

The listed below post is a great intro to bid bonds. Bid bonds, as you are conscious, are bonds utilized in the building and construction market. These bonds guarantee that if somebody quotes on a job, and is awarded the agreement, then they will move forward with performing under the terms of the agreement.

See the below article for more great details. You can see the original short article here: https://swiftbonds.com/bid-bond/minnesota-2/

Minnesota Bid Bonds

What is a Bid Bond in Minnesota?

A bid bond is one of the types of surety bonds, which guarantees that the bidder will enter into the agreement and complete the contract according to its terms. The bid bond provides assurance to the project owner that the bidder has the ability and wherewithal to finish the job once you are selected after the bidding process. The simple reason is that you need one so that you get the contract. But the larger question is why are more owners/developers requiring a surety bid bond? The basic answer is risk. Given the uncertainty of the marketplace, which includes long-term contractors closing their doors, to municipalities filing bankruptcy (or just slow paying), has led to owners being afraid that their contractors will be unable to finish the work. So, they require a some protection.

Just fill out our bond application here and email it to gary@swiftbonds.com – click here to get our Minnesota Bid Bond Application

A bid bond is issued as part of a bid by a surety bond company to the project owner. The owner is then assures that the winning bidder will take on the contract under the terms at which they bid.

Most bid bonds contain a bid percentage (usually five (5%) or ten (10%) percent, is forfeited if you don’t accept the job).

How much does a Bid Bond Cost in Minnesota?

Swiftbonds does not charge for a bid bond (with two exceptions, see below). The reason that we don’t charge for a bid bond is that we will charge for the P&P bond if you win the contract. The cost of a bid bond can vary widely depending on the amount of coverage that is required (see below).

Two exceptions for bid bond charges: 1) We do charge for Overnight fees 2) We will charge you if there is NOT going to be a contract bond.

How much do bonds cost in MN?

Bond prices fluctuate based on the job size (that is, it’s based on the cost of the underlying contract). The cost of a bond is estimated through a couple of back-of-the-envelope calculations. In general, the cost is approximately three percent (3%) for jobs under $800,000 and then the percentage is lower as the contract amount increases. We work diligently to find the lowest premiums possible in the state of Minnesota. Please call us today at (913) 286-6501. We’ll find you the very best rate possible for your maintenance bond or completion bond. Things that can affect this pricing are the perceived risk of the job, the financial position of the entity being bonded, plus other factors.

Bond Amount Needed Fee 2-3% >$800,000 1.5-3% >$1.500,000 1-3%

These rates are for Merit clients, Standard rates are higher

How do I get a Bid Bond in Minnesota?

We make it easy to get a contract bid bond. Just click here to get our Minnesota Bid Bond Application. Fill it out and then email it and the Minnesota bid specs/contract documents to gary@swiftbonds.com or fax to 855-433-4192.

You can also call us at (913) 286-6501. We thoroughly review each application for bid and P&P bonds and then submit it to the surety that we believe will provide the best surety bond for your company. We have a very high success rate in getting our clients bid bonds at the best rates possible.

What is a Minnesota Bid Bond?

A bid bond is a bond that assures that you will accept the work if you win the contract. The bid fee (usually five or ten percent) is a penalty that is paid when you win the bid, but then back out of doing the work.

Find a Bid Bond near Me

Typically, a bid bond and payment bond are done together in the same contract by the surety. This way, the owner of the project is assured that the project can be completed pursuant to the terms of the contract and that it will not be liened by any contractor. The bond is risk security for the benefit of the owner.

Who Gets the Bid Bond?

The general contractor is the entity that obtains the bond. It is for the benefit of the owner (or in the case of government contract work, the governmental entity). It’s the general contractor that has to apply for the bond and be underwritten before the bid bond is written by the surety. This is also known as bonding a business.

We provide bid bonds in each of the following counties:

Aitkin Anoka Becker Beltrami Benton Big Stone Blue Earth Brown Carlton Carver Cass Chippewa Chisago Clay Clearwater Cook Cottonwood Crow Wing Dakota Dodge Douglas Faribault Fillmore Freeborn Goodhue Grant Hennepin Houston Hubbard Isanti Itasca Jackson Kanabec Kandiyohi Kittson Koochiching Lac Qui Parle Lake Lake Of The Wood Le Sueur Lincoln Lyon Mahnomen Marshall Martin McLeod Meeker Mille Lacs Morrison Mower Murray Nicollet Nobles Norman Olmsted Otter Tail Pennington Pine Pipestone Polk Pope Ramsey Red Lake Redwood Renville Rice Rock Roseau St. Louis Scott Sherburne Sibley Stearns Steele Stevens Swift Todd Traverse Wabasha Wadena Waseca Washington Watonwan Wilkin Winona Wright Yellow Medicine

And Cities: Minneapolis Saint Paul Duluth St. Cloud Bloomington Mankato Eagan Burnsville Edina Eden Prairie

See our Mississippi Bid Bond page here.

More on Surety Bid Bonds https://swiftbonds.com/bid-bond/.

Learning More About Applying and Finding The Right Bid Bonds For Your Needs

Bid Bonds can be complicated to apply for, especially if you don’t understand how they work. Most individuals consider this as insurance, but it’s actually a type of guarantee that the principal will perform their work properly for the obliged. Insurance companies usually offer a Surety Bid Bond, but you cannot call it insurance because its function is different. Most individuals will require you to get a bid bond before they consider your services as it is a form of guarantee to them.

If you’d like to consider applying for a bid bond or other bonds, you must understand how they work. We will provide you information on the importance of Bid Bonds and how they actually work.

The Importance Of A Surety Bid Bond

Bid Bonds will always be in demand to protect the public because it is a kind of assurance that your obligations and duties will be completed. Most states require you to get a license surety bond to ensure that your company will adhere to state code and laws and you get a contract bond to guarantee that a public project will be completed. A Surety Bid Bond is meant for the obliged since they are the ones that are being protected, but it will also benefit you because the clients will trust you and your work. There are thousands of bonds right now and the type of bond that you are trying to find will depend upon your situation.

The Primary Purpose Of A Surety Bid Bond

Bid Bonds are a three-party agreement between the principal, the obliged and the surety company. The principal is the employer or company which will perform the work and the obliged is known as the project owner. Construction companies will almost always be required by law to acquire Bid Bonds if they’re chosen for a public project. The government will require a construction company to get a host of bonds before they work on a certain project. The bond will ensure that the sub-contractors and the other workers will be paid even if the contractor defaults. The contractor will cover the losses, but when they reach their limit, the duty will fall to the surety company.

How To Apply For A Surety Bid Bond

Bid Bonds are provided by insurance providers, but there are standalone surety businesses that focus on these products. A surety company must be licensed by a state Department of Insurance.

It won’t be easy to apply for a bond since the applicants will have to go through a process that is comparable to applying for a loan. The bond underwriters will look into the credit profile of the applicant, their financial history and other key factors.

It means that there is a chance that you won’t be approved for a bid bond, particularly if the bond underwriters see something from your credit rating that makes them think you will be a risk.

How Much Will You Spend?

You cannot put an exact cost on a Surety Bid Bond because the cost is affected by numerous factors like the bond type, bond amount, where it will likely be issued, contractual risk, credit history of the applicant and more. There are thousands of different bonds available today and the cost will depend on the bond that you want to get. The amount of the bond will be a factor because you could select a $10,000 bond or a $25,000 bond or higher.

If you already have a credit history of 700 and above or very near this number, you can be eligible for the standard bonding market and you will need to pay 1 to 4 percent of the Surety Bid Bond amount. It means that if you obtain a $10,000 bond, you only have to pay $100 to $400 for the interest.

Your Application For A Bid Bond Could Be Rejected

There is a possibility that your bid bond request will be refused by the surety company since it will depend upon the information that they can get from the background check. If the surety company thinks that it will be a risk to give you a bid bond, they will deny your application. Your credit history is one of the most important factors to be approved for a bid bond because if you have a bad credit history, it shows a risk of default on the bond.

You CAN get a bid bond even if you have a bad credit score, but most likely you will pay an interest rate upwards of 10 to 20 percent.

If you plan to get a Surety Bid Bond, make certain you understand what is required prior to deciding. It is not easy to apply for, but if you know more about them, it will be a little bit easier to be approved.

A Much Deeper Take A Look At Quote Bonds in Building And Construction If granted, a Quote Bond is a type of surety bond used to make sure that a specialist bidding on a task or job will get in into the contract with the obligee.

A Quote Bond is provided in the quantity of the agreement quote, with the similar requirements as that of a Performance Bond.

All About Bid Bonds in Building The origins of our business was carefully connected with the provision of efficiency bonds to the contracting market. A little higher than one a century earlier, the federal authorities grew to become alarmed worrying the high failure fee among the private companies it was using to perform public construction projects. It discovered that the private specialist typically was insolvent when the task was granted, or grew to become insolvent earlier than the challenge was completed. Appropriately, the federal government was continually entrusted incomplete initiatives, and the taxpayers had been forced to cover the additional prices occurring from the contractor's default.

The standing of your surety firm is important, since it guarantees you that when you have troubles or if worse involves worst you'll have a trusted partner to turn to and get help from. We work only with A-rated and T-listed companies, most likely the most dependable corporations in the market.

Generally no, they are separate. Bid bonds mechanically turn into performance bonds in case you are awarded the agreement.

What Is A Construction Surety Bond? The origins of our company was thoroughly connected with the arrangement of performance bonds to the contracting market. Even if some tasks do not require cost and efficiency bonds, you will need to get bonded finally because the bulk of public efforts do require the bonds. The longer a small specialist waits to get bonded, the more resilient it will be because there will not be a observe report of fulfilling the mandatory requirements for bonding and carrying out bonded work.

The only restrict is the biggest bond you may get for one particular job. The aggregate limit is the entire amount of bonded work readily available you perhaps can have without delay.

The Importance Of Bid Bonds near You Arms, generators, radio towers, tree removal, computers, softward, emergency alarm, ornamental work, scaffolding, water towers, lighting, and resurfacing of current roads/paved areas. Bid bonds additionally function an extra warranty for task owners that a bidding contractor or subcontractor is certified to execute the task they're bidding on. There are 2 causes for this.

https://swiftbonds.com/bid-bond/minnesota-2/

[tomorowlandword]

Minnesota Bid Bonds

The listed below post is a great intro to bid bonds. Bid bonds, as you are conscious, are bonds utilized in the building and construction market. These bonds guarantee that if somebody quotes on a job, and is awarded the agreement, then they will move forward with performing under the terms of the agreement.

See the below article for more great details. You can see the original short article here: https://swiftbonds.com/bid-bond/minnesota-2/

Minnesota Bid Bonds

What is a Bid Bond in Minnesota?

A bid bond is one of the types of surety bonds, which guarantees that the bidder will enter into the agreement and complete the contract according to its terms. The bid bond provides assurance to the project owner that the bidder has the ability and wherewithal to finish the job once you are selected after the bidding process. The simple reason is that you need one so that you get the contract. But the larger question is why are more owners/developers requiring a surety bid bond? The basic answer is risk. Given the uncertainty of the marketplace, which includes long-term contractors closing their doors, to municipalities filing bankruptcy (or just slow paying), has led to owners being afraid that their contractors will be unable to finish the work. So, they require a some protection.

Just fill out our bond application here and email it to gary@swiftbonds.com – click here to get our Minnesota Bid Bond Application

A bid bond is issued as part of a bid by a surety bond company to the project owner. The owner is then assures that the winning bidder will take on the contract under the terms at which they bid.

Most bid bonds contain a bid percentage (usually five (5%) or ten (10%) percent, is forfeited if you don’t accept the job).

How much does a Bid Bond Cost in Minnesota?

Swiftbonds does not charge for a bid bond (with two exceptions, see below). The reason that we don’t charge for a bid bond is that we will charge for the P&P bond if you win the contract. The cost of a bid bond can vary widely depending on the amount of coverage that is required (see below).

Two exceptions for bid bond charges: 1) We do charge for Overnight fees 2) We will charge you if there is NOT going to be a contract bond.

How much do bonds cost in MN?

Bond prices fluctuate based on the job size (that is, it’s based on the cost of the underlying contract). The cost of a bond is estimated through a couple of back-of-the-envelope calculations. In general, the cost is approximately three percent (3%) for jobs under $800,000 and then the percentage is lower as the contract amount increases. We work diligently to find the lowest premiums possible in the state of Minnesota. Please call us today at (913) 286-6501. We’ll find you the very best rate possible for your maintenance bond or completion bond. Things that can affect this pricing are the perceived risk of the job, the financial position of the entity being bonded, plus other factors.

Bond Amount Needed Fee 2-3% >$800,000 1.5-3% >$1.500,000 1-3%

These rates are for Merit clients, Standard rates are higher

How do I get a Bid Bond in Minnesota?

We make it easy to get a contract bid bond. Just click here to get our Minnesota Bid Bond Application. Fill it out and then email it and the Minnesota bid specs/contract documents to gary@swiftbonds.com or fax to 855-433-4192.

You can also call us at (913) 286-6501. We thoroughly review each application for bid and P&P bonds and then submit it to the surety that we believe will provide the best surety bond for your company. We have a very high success rate in getting our clients bid bonds at the best rates possible.

What is a Minnesota Bid Bond?

A bid bond is a bond that assures that you will accept the work if you win the contract. The bid fee (usually five or ten percent) is a penalty that is paid when you win the bid, but then back out of doing the work.

Find a Bid Bond near Me

Typically, a bid bond and payment bond are done together in the same contract by the surety. This way, the owner of the project is assured that the project can be completed pursuant to the terms of the contract and that it will not be liened by any contractor. The bond is risk security for the benefit of the owner.

Who Gets the Bid Bond?

The general contractor is the entity that obtains the bond. It is for the benefit of the owner (or in the case of government contract work, the governmental entity). It’s the general contractor that has to apply for the bond and be underwritten before the bid bond is written by the surety. This is also known as bonding a business.

We provide bid bonds in each of the following counties:

Aitkin Anoka Becker Beltrami Benton Big Stone Blue Earth Brown Carlton Carver Cass Chippewa Chisago Clay Clearwater Cook Cottonwood Crow Wing Dakota Dodge Douglas Faribault Fillmore Freeborn Goodhue Grant Hennepin Houston Hubbard Isanti Itasca Jackson Kanabec Kandiyohi Kittson Koochiching Lac Qui Parle Lake Lake Of The Wood Le Sueur Lincoln Lyon Mahnomen Marshall Martin McLeod Meeker Mille Lacs Morrison Mower Murray Nicollet Nobles Norman Olmsted Otter Tail Pennington Pine Pipestone Polk Pope Ramsey Red Lake Redwood Renville Rice Rock Roseau St. Louis Scott Sherburne Sibley Stearns Steele Stevens Swift Todd Traverse Wabasha Wadena Waseca Washington Watonwan Wilkin Winona Wright Yellow Medicine

And Cities: Minneapolis Saint Paul Duluth St. Cloud Bloomington Mankato Eagan Burnsville Edina Eden Prairie

See our Mississippi Bid Bond page here.

More on Surety Bid Bonds https://swiftbonds.com/bid-bond/.

Learning More About Applying and Finding The Right Bid Bonds For Your Needs

Bid Bonds can be complicated to apply for, especially if you don’t understand how they work. Most individuals consider this as insurance, but it’s actually a type of guarantee that the principal will perform their work properly for the obliged. Insurance companies usually offer a Surety Bid Bond, but you cannot call it insurance because its function is different. Most individuals will require you to get a bid bond before they consider your services as it is a form of guarantee to them.

If you’d like to consider applying for a bid bond or other bonds, you must understand how they work. We will provide you information on the importance of Bid Bonds and how they actually work.

The Importance Of A Surety Bid Bond

Bid Bonds will always be in demand to protect the public because it is a kind of assurance that your obligations and duties will be completed. Most states require you to get a license surety bond to ensure that your company will adhere to state code and laws and you get a contract bond to guarantee that a public project will be completed. A Surety Bid Bond is meant for the obliged since they are the ones that are being protected, but it will also benefit you because the clients will trust you and your work. There are thousands of bonds right now and the type of bond that you are trying to find will depend upon your situation.

The Primary Purpose Of A Surety Bid Bond

Bid Bonds are a three-party agreement between the principal, the obliged and the surety company. The principal is the employer or company which will perform the work and the obliged is known as the project owner. Construction companies will almost always be required by law to acquire Bid Bonds if they’re chosen for a public project. The government will require a construction company to get a host of bonds before they work on a certain project. The bond will ensure that the sub-contractors and the other workers will be paid even if the contractor defaults. The contractor will cover the losses, but when they reach their limit, the duty will fall to the surety company.

How To Apply For A Surety Bid Bond

Bid Bonds are provided by insurance providers, but there are standalone surety businesses that focus on these products. A surety company must be licensed by a state Department of Insurance.

It won’t be easy to apply for a bond since the applicants will have to go through a process that is comparable to applying for a loan. The bond underwriters will look into the credit profile of the applicant, their financial history and other key factors.

It means that there is a chance that you won’t be approved for a bid bond, particularly if the bond underwriters see something from your credit rating that makes them think you will be a risk.

How Much Will You Spend?

You cannot put an exact cost on a Surety Bid Bond because the cost is affected by numerous factors like the bond type, bond amount, where it will likely be issued, contractual risk, credit history of the applicant and more. There are thousands of different bonds available today and the cost will depend on the bond that you want to get. The amount of the bond will be a factor because you could select a $10,000 bond or a $25,000 bond or higher.

If you already have a credit history of 700 and above or very near this number, you can be eligible for the standard bonding market and you will need to pay 1 to 4 percent of the Surety Bid Bond amount. It means that if you obtain a $10,000 bond, you only have to pay $100 to $400 for the interest.

Your Application For A Bid Bond Could Be Rejected

There is a possibility that your bid bond request will be refused by the surety company since it will depend upon the information that they can get from the background check. If the surety company thinks that it will be a risk to give you a bid bond, they will deny your application. Your credit history is one of the most important factors to be approved for a bid bond because if you have a bad credit history, it shows a risk of default on the bond.

You CAN get a bid bond even if you have a bad credit score, but most likely you will pay an interest rate upwards of 10 to 20 percent.

If you plan to get a Surety Bid Bond, make certain you understand what is required prior to deciding. It is not easy to apply for, but if you know more about them, it will be a little bit easier to be approved.

A Much Deeper Take A Look At Quote Bonds in Building And Construction If granted, a Quote Bond is a type of surety bond used to make sure that a specialist bidding on a task or job will get in into the contract with the obligee.

A Quote Bond is provided in the quantity of the agreement quote, with the similar requirements as that of a Performance Bond.

All About Bid Bonds in Building The origins of our business was carefully connected with the provision of efficiency bonds to the contracting market. A little higher than one a century earlier, the federal authorities grew to become alarmed worrying the high failure fee among the private companies it was using to perform public construction projects. It discovered that the private specialist typically was insolvent when the task was granted, or grew to become insolvent earlier than the challenge was completed. Appropriately, the federal government was continually entrusted incomplete initiatives, and the taxpayers had been forced to cover the additional prices occurring from the contractor's default.

The standing of your surety firm is important, since it guarantees you that when you have troubles or if worse involves worst you'll have a trusted partner to turn to and get help from. We work only with A-rated and T-listed companies, most likely the most dependable corporations in the market.

Generally no, they are separate. Bid bonds mechanically turn into performance bonds in case you are awarded the agreement.

What Is A Construction Surety Bond? The origins of our company was thoroughly connected with the arrangement of performance bonds to the contracting market. Even if some tasks do not require cost and efficiency bonds, you will need to get bonded finally because the bulk of public efforts do require the bonds. The longer a small specialist waits to get bonded, the more resilient it will be because there will not be a observe report of fulfilling the mandatory requirements for bonding and carrying out bonded work.

The only restrict is the biggest bond you may get for one particular job. The aggregate limit is the entire amount of bonded work readily available you perhaps can have without delay.

The Importance Of Bid Bonds near You Arms, generators, radio towers, tree removal, computers, softward, emergency alarm, ornamental work, scaffolding, water towers, lighting, and resurfacing of current roads/paved areas. Bid bonds additionally function an extra warranty for task owners that a bidding contractor or subcontractor is certified to execute the task they're bidding on. There are 2 causes for this.

https://swiftbonds.com/bid-bond/minnesota-2/

[rammdilsplays]

Cultural effects of Cricket world cup

Booth has grown more strident on social and cultural issues over the last couple of years, commissioning Tanya Aldred to write a daring article on sexism in cricket. After England won the 2017 Women’s World Cup, Booth made Anya Shrubsole the cover star and named three of the team among the Five Cricketers of the Year meaning no place for Hasan Ali, whose curving white-ball magic won Pakistan the (men’s) Champions Trophy. Booth admits he came close to making all five women, but “wanted to avoid being accused of gimmickry”. The Comment section is a balance between crickety features; socially minded pieces; and other features that we hope won’t be scooped by the newspapers before us. I actually commissioned Tanya’s piece before the #MeToo movement came about. Above all what we’re looking for is great and original ideas, brilliantly written. “I think Wisden at its best is social history – when it tells you something about the society it comes from. And so we owe it to the tradition of Wisden to reflect that.”

Joy in death

Paradoxically, nowhere does Wisden more teem with life than in its death knock. Collated by deputy editor Steven Lynch, Engel and contributing editor Richard Whitehead, the obituaries are no longer satisfied with just a player’s career, but wrestle with personality and the social context. The very best – like that of Tony Greig in 2013 – truly are sublime social history. It is, apparently, only 33 years since Wisden’s thenobituaries editor, Bob Arrowsmith, said on a BBC Two documentary: “I think a man’s character a man’s vices haven’t much to do with whether he gets a place in a county side or not. So long as he behaves on the fi eld of play, and isn’t caught cheating and that sort of a thing, it doesn’t really affect his career. It’s nothing to do with Wisden what he does off the field.”

Whitehead credits Engel for making the change in tone in his first reforming stint as editor from 1993 to 2000: “I think Matthew changed the face of the obits he took his example from Hugh Massingberd at the Daily Telegraph, who is seen as a bit of a trailblazer in the obituary world. “I’m sure some of the previous reticence was down to the deference of the time. But the obituary of Tich Freeman [in Wisden 1966] is a bit of a disgrace, really. It’s just not long enough for a player of his quality. That’s one reason I wrote my recent feature on Freeman for The Cricketer.” Wisden obituaries still go uncredited. “I think that’s correct,” says Whitehead, “because I think if you byline someone then suddenly the link between that person and the subject can be called into question.”

“Before the truth has got its pads on…”

In Wisden 2013, Jonathan Liew reflected on a cricket media where “a rumour is halfway round the world before the truth has got its pads on”. Flawless accuracy is impossible to achieve across 1,500 pages; goodness knows I let through my share. But Wisden does at least try to get everything right – to the extent that the fl ow of a beautifully-written sentence can sometimes be sacrifi ced on the altar of accuracy. In the 1980s, John Woodcock and Graeme Wright – a New Zealander, and still the only non-British editor – dragged Wisden forward after countless editions overseen by press agency men. In his fi rst stint in the top job, Wright’s team contained two women, Christine Forrest and Harriet Monkhouse. Monkhouse arrived from Computer Weekly in 1990, and remains sub-editor and fact-checker beyond compare, scouring every scorecard that comes through the feeds for discrepancies. The most famous Wisden clanger was when 18-year-old Yorkshire debutant Fred Trueman was referred to as a “spin bowler”. And when Zimbabwe “president” Robert Mugabe was quoted in Wisden 1985 – he was the prime minister then – it did present the unmissable opportunity to include Canaan Banana in the next year’s Errata.

“Kicking and screaming into the 1920s”

The enduring revolution in Wisden’s appearance came in 1938, when new publishers Whitaker’s introduced soft primrose-shade covers, the Eric Ravilious woodcut of two top-hatted gentlemen, dropped John Wisden’s full name from the title and replaced it with ‘WISDEN’ splashed like a wanted poster in a Western, and sprinkled more pictures around. Sales shot up by 75 per cent. When Tim de Lisle, the modernising editor of Wisden Cricket Monthly, stood in for one edition in 2003 – destined to be referred to as Wisden’s George Lazenby – he saw it was time for another revamp. Most famously, he moved Ravilious’ woodcut to the spine – replacing it with the fi rst cover photo, of Michael Vaughan in the 2002/03 Ashes – doubled the front-of-book articles, and made Wisden generally better-looking. “Tim was keen to make the most of his year, and pushed through a lot of changes to a book more used to evolution than revolution,” says Hugh Chevallier, now co-editor. “It made for an interesting time. Many of his innovations, though, made perfect sense, so Wisden now has a photo on the cover, full-page pictures for section openers, summaries of how each Test country got on the previous year, and smarter-looking headings.”

The Telegraph’s Giles Smith quipped that de Lisle had taken Wisden “kicking and screaming into the 1920s”, though Charles Pardon (Sydney’s older brother, who died in the job aged 40) had fi rst introduced player portraits way back in 1889, and Wright the fi rst colour photos in 1988. There are still more than 200 pictures in every Wisden, and the colour plates are a dazzling array of images from MCG to maidan. “I don’t suppose we’ll win design prizes,” says Chevallier, “though I think the book does have a timeless elegance. It has always changed, yet you still know automatically you’re looking at a page in Wisden.”

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Fair Use Law

Under the doctrine of “fair use,” the law allows the use of portions of copyrighted work without permission from the owner. Fair use is a defense to copyright infringement. These types of issues are regularly debated and argued by the intellectual property lawyer in our office. You should know that the unauthorized use of copyrighted material is excusable if it falls under the principle of fair use. Although the law does provide guidelines for making this assessment, determining fair use is not always easy since it is a grey area of the law. Consequently, courts make decisions on a case-by-case basis.

Under Title 17 of the U.S. Code, copyright owners have the right to limit the use of their creative work. An owner has the right to distribute, reproduce, display, make derivatives, or perform the work in public. This right applies to both published and unpublished works fixed in a tangible medium. Creative works include: • Literature • Music • Motion pictures and other audiovisual productions • Sound recordings • Pantomimes and choreography • Pictorial, graphic, and sculptures • Architectural designs Copyright law does not apply to ideas and facts; names, pen names, titles, or slogans; extemporaneous speeches; blank forms and standardized material; and government works. Although copyright law does not protect facts and ideas, copyright protects the author’s phrasing or form of expression.

Under the Copyright Act, the fair use of copyrighted material without permission is allowed when used for the following purposes: • Criticism; • Comment; • News reporting; • Teaching, includes making copies for use in the classroom; • Scholarship and research; • Parody. These uses do not grant the right to use the copyrighted work in its entirety. Rather, the use should be limited to quoting, excerpting, summarizing, and making educational copies of the material.

Fair Use Test

Courts consider four factors when evaluating whether an unauthorized use of copyrighted material is fair. The following factors are guidelines under the Copyright Act are (1) the purpose and character of the use, including whether such use is of a commercial nature or is for nonprofit educational purposes: Courts consider whether the use is transformative. For instance, was the purpose of the new use transformative, did a new expression change the original work, or did the use create new information or lead to new ideas? The more transformative a new work, the more likely a court will consider it fair use. (2) The nature of the copyrighted work: Courts look at whether the copyrighted work is creative or factual and whether it is published or unpublished. Creative works, such as fiction, creative nonfiction, pictures, and graphic works, typically receive more protection. Factual works, such as history accounts and scientific works, receive less protection because of the benefit to society from the exchange of ideas . Authors have a right to decide when to publish their work, so the use of unpublished works without permission is less acceptable than using published works.

(3) The amount and substantiality of the portion used in relation to the copyrighted work as a whole: Courts consider how much material was copied and was the copied material a central part of the original work. When a large portion of the entire copyrighted material is used or it includes the use of a central point, it is less likely that a court will consider it fair use. For, parody, however, it is acceptable to borrow a large portion and to use the central part of the original work. (4) The effect of the use upon the potential market for or value of the copyrighted work: A court will look closely at a use that deprives a copyright holder of income, regardless of whether the new material is competing in the same market. Important factors include the current market and the potential market. Courts may use additional factors to determine whether the unauthorized use of copyrighted material is fair.

Some Court Decisions on Fair Use

Courts evaluate fair use on a case-by-case basis. The following are cases in which a court ruled that an unauthorized use was fair: (1) Reproduction of images into thumbnails to display on search results pages was fair use because the alteration of the image was transformative, and therefore, it outweighed the commercial benefit received by Google. (2) A biographer’s quotation of 16 unpublished documents was fair use because it comprised no more than 1 percent of Richard Wright’s unpublished documents and it was for an informational purpose.

The following are cases in which a court ruled that unauthorized use was not fair: (1) It was not fair use for the Nation magazine to publish central parts of former President Gerald Ford’s memoir prior to its publication because it substantially decreased its marketability. (2) Paraphrasing a substantial portion of author J.D. Salinger’s unpublished letters in a biography was not excusable under the fair use doctrine because the general public would view them in this format for the first time and the paraphrased material was a central part of the biography.

Fair Use Lawyer Free Consultation

If you are here, you probably have a fair use issue you need help with. If so, call Ascent Law for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you.

Ascent Law LLC 8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite C West Jordan, Utah 84088 United States Telephone: (801) 676-5506

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Repost: https://stevenrushutah.wordpress.com/2019/01/27/fair-use-law/ * Steven E. Rush * https://stevenrushutah.wordpress.com/

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Sarcastic Quotes And Sayings

https://www.aswadwrites.in/sarcastic-quotes/

Sarcastic Quotes And Sayings

If you carry contempt for or mock something, the use of words that say something else but mean the other, then this is sarcasm. In other phrases, you are the usage of irony to do it. I guess, better than defining what’s sarcasm. Must I permit the subsequent listing of sarcastic quotes do the talking? Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old sarcasm quotes, sarcasm sayings, and sarcasm proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.

Sarcastic Quotes

Sarcastic Quotes About Love

This is what happened in love. One of you cried a lot and then both of you grew sarcastic. ~ Lorrie Moore

The consumer isn’t a moron; she is your wife. ~ David Ogilvy

Martyrdom: The only way a man can become famous without ability. ~ George Bernard Shaw

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I’m beginning to believe it. ~ Clarence Darrow

99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name. ~ Steven Wright

Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them. ~ P. J. O’Rourke

If life gives you lemons, then be thankful for it. I have been getting only the peels for as long as I can remember! ~ Anonymous Feared

No, no, no. I’m not insulting you. I’m just describing you. ~ Anonymous

Marriage is a bliss for people who aren’t in it. ~ Anonymous

Read: 20+ Beautiful Heart Touching Quotes Collection

I asked you for some lunch money, and you gave me a dollar? Your benevolence always touches my soul! ~ Anonymous

Oh, come on! I am not being sarcastic with you. You really sing well… In fact, you sing better than the wretched crows in my neighborhood! Damn those crows… ~ Anonymous

If a stranger offers you a piece of candy, take two. ~ Anonymous

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. ~ Groucho Marx

You’d be in good shape if you ran as much as your mouth. ~ Anonymous

Types of People Eye Roll and Heart Eyes I sometimes think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his ability. ~ Oscar Wilde

Sarcastic Quotes About Love

Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either. ~ Anonymous

When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. ~ Sacha Guitry

Sarcastic Quotes About Fake People

Shocked thick guy using modern technology Baby Girl getting a Shot Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have. ~ Anonymous

Many wealthy people are little more than janitors of their possessions. ~ Frank Lloyd Wright

Not all women are annoying. Some are dead. ~ Anonymous

This place is so weird that the cockroaches have moved next door. ~ Anonymous

Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit. ~ Billy Connolly

If you’ve never met the devil in the road of life, it’s because you’re both heading in the same direction. ~ Anonymous

Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately, it kills all its students! ~ Robin Williams

When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark. ~ Anonymous

I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it was too late. ~ Max Kauffmann

Check: Incredible Sad Status For Whatsapp

If you don’t want a sarcastic answer, then don’t ask a stupid question. ~ Anonymous

I can be quite sarcastic when I’m in the mood. ~ J.D. Salinger

Like good wine, marriage gets better with age – once you learn to keep a cork in it. ~ Gene Perret

It’s a funny thing that when a man hasn’t anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married. ~ Robert Frost

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your back pocket. ~ Will Rogers

I am in full possession of the amazing power of being sarcastic. ~ Sarah Rees Brennan

I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time? ~ Anonymous

Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it? ~ Anonymous

Sarcastic Quotes About Fake People

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire. ~ Anonymous

There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works. ~ Will Rogers

Sarcastic Quotes About Life Lessons

He loves nature in spite of what it did to him. ~ Forrest Tucker

Handsome gangster Portrait of a surprised cat breed Scottish Fold It might look like I’m doing nothing, but at the cellular level, I’m really quite busy. ~ Anonymous

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar. ~ Drew Carey

You can be whatever you want; however, in your case, you should probably aim low. ~ Anonymous

Life is like a roller coaster, and I’m about to throw up. ~ Anonymous

I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. ~ Sam Kinison

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. ~ Steven Wright

It sounds like English, but I can’t understand a word you’re saying. ~ Anonymous

Check: Attitude Quotes And Status (Latest Collection)

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. ~ Mark Twain

I love deadlines, I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. ~ Anonymous

I’m a man of leisure. That’s because I have an English degree and can’t get a job. ~ Jarod Kintz

I’ll always cherish the original misconception I had of you. ~ Anonymous

Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them. ~ Anonymous

You know there’s just one more thing to need to do after you crack a joke… Tickle the other person! ~ Anonymous

I’ve had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn’t. ~ Patrick Murray

Why would someone who has an average life expectancy of 75 years, get married when he is 29? ~ Anonymous

Sarcastic Quotes About Life Lessons

Tell me… Is being stupid a profession or are you just gifted? ~ Anonymous

Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I are not sure about the universe. ~ Albert Einstein

Sarcastic Quotes On Life Facts

Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence. ~ Ashleigh Brilliant

I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here. ~ Stephen Bishop

Marry me and I’ll never look at another horse! ~ Groucho Marx

Marriage is a romance in which the heroine dies in the first chapter. ~ Cecilia Egan

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. ~ Joan Crawford

Love is the answer, but while you’re waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions. ~ Woody Allen

Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery. ~ Erma Bombeck

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. ~ Groucho Marx

In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. ~ Woody Allen

We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops. ~ Henny Youngman

You’re not that lucky and I’m not that desperate! ~ Anonymous

Read: Sad Quotes About Life

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution? ~ Groucho Marx

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he’s a baby. ~ Natalie Wood

If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out. ~ Lawrence Ferlinghetti

Marriage is given and take. You’d better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway. ~ Joey Adams

There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than

electronic banking. It’s called marriage. ~ James Holt McGavran

Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people. ~ Oscar Wilde

Sarcastic Quotes On Life Facts

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. ~ Sir Winston Churchill

Do not worry about your difficulties in mathematics, I can assure you that mine are all greater. ~ Albert Einstein

Sarcastic Quotes About Annoying People

“Well, my imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems.”

“I’ve got a good heart but this mouth…”

“Cancel my subscription because I don’t need your issues.”

“Me pretending to listen should be enough for you.”

“If you’re waiting for me to give a shit, you better pack a lunch. It’s going to be while.”

“Ugliness can be fixed, stupidity is forever.”

“Zombies eat brains. You’re safe.”

“Are you always this retarded or are you making a special effort today?”

“You’d be in good shape… if you run as much as your mouth.”

“If karma doesn’t hit you, I gladly will.”

“Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you’ll find a brain back there.”

“Tact is for people who aren’t witty enough to use sarcasm.”

“You always do me a favor, when you shut up!”

“Tell me how I have upset you because I want to know how to do it again.”

“I’m not crazy! The voices tell me I am entirely sane.”

“Sure I’ll help you out… the same way you came in.”

“Shut your mouth when you’re talking to me.”

“I’d agree with you but then we’d both be wrong.”

“Think I am sarcastic? Watch me pretend to care!”

Check: Good Morning Quotes

“My friends are so much cooler than yours. They’re invisible.”

“If it looks like I give a damn, please tell me. I don’t want to give off the wrong impression.”

“You sound better with your mouth closed.”

“If ignorance is bliss. You must be the happiest person on this planet.”

“I’m smiling… that alone should scare you.”

“If you wrote down every single thought you ever had you would get an award for the shortest story ever.”

Sarcastic Quotes About Annoying People

“If I promise to miss you, will you go away?”

“I’ll try being nicer if you try being smarter.”

“Thank you for leaving my side when I was alone. I realized I can do so much without you.”

Sarcastic Quotes About Relationships

“Fighting with me is like being in the Special Olympics. You may win, but in the end, you’re still a retard.”

“Well, at least your mom thinks you’re pretty.”

“My neighbor’s diary says that I have boundary issues.”

“Just because the voices only talk to me doesn’t mean you should get all jealous. You’re just a little too crazy for their taste.”

“Don’t worry about what people think. They don’t do it very often.”

“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.”

“I clapped because it’s finished, not because I like it.”

“I’m not listening, but keep talking. I enjoy the way your voice makes my ears bleed.”

Read: Top 50 Best Collection of Funny Whatsapp Status

“I’m not sarcastic. I’m just intelligent beyond your understanding.”

“Sarcasm, because beating the crap out of people is illegal.”

“Sarcasm is the body’s natural defense against stupidity.”

“I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?

“That is the ugliest top I’ve ever seen, yet it compliments your face perfectly.”

“Life’s good, you should get one.”

“No, you don’t have to repeat yourself. I was ignoring you the first time.”

“Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit! Yet it remains the funniest!”

“I’m sorry while you were talking I was trying to figure where the hell you got the idea I cared.”

“Just keep talking, I yawn when I’m interested.”

“Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.”

“I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and don’t want to see your ugly mug every day.”

“I never forget a face, but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.”

Sarcastic Quotes About Relationships

“Sarcasm: Helping the intelligent politely tolerate the obtuse for thousands of years.”

“Everyone has the right to be stupid, but you are abusing the privilege.”

“People say that laughter is the best medicine… your face must be curing the world.”

Sarcastic Quotes About Work

“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.” – Steven Wright

“When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark.”

“It’s okay if you don’t like me. Not everyone has good taste.”

“You look good when your eyes are closed, but you look the best when my eyes closed.”

“Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either.”

“If had a dollar for every smart thing you say. I’ll be poor.”

“I don’t believe in plastic surgery. But in your case, go ahead.”

“Are you always so stupid or is today a special occasion?”

“I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.”

“If you find me offensive. Then I suggest you quit finding me.”

“Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.”

“If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ.”

“I love sarcasm. It’s like punching people in the face but with words.”

Check: Good Status For Whatsapp

“I don’t have the energy to pretend to like you today.”

“I’m not saying I hate you, what I’m saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life.”

“I’m sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.”

“Sarcasm – the ability to insult idiots without them realizing it.”

“Unless your name is Google stop acting like you know everything.”

“Yet despite the look on my face… you are still talking.”

“Find your patience before I lose mine.”

“Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.”

“Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.” – Ashleigh Brilliant

Sarcastic Quotes About Work

“Sarcasm: because arguing with stupid people just wouldn’t be as much fun.”

“If at first, you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.”

“My imaginary friend says that you need a therapist.”

“Let’s share… You’ll take the grenade, I’ll take the pin.”

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Sarcastic Quotes And Sayings

https://www.aswadwrites.in/sarcastic-quotes/

Sarcastic Quotes And Sayings

If you carry contempt for or mock something, the use of words that say something else but mean the other, then this is sarcasm. In other phrases, you are the usage of irony to do it. I guess, better than defining what’s sarcasm. Must I permit the subsequent listing of sarcastic quotes do the talking? Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old sarcasm quotes, sarcasm sayings, and sarcasm proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.

Sarcastic Quotes

Sarcastic Quotes About Love

This is what happened in love. One of you cried a lot and then both of you grew sarcastic. ~ Lorrie Moore

The consumer isn’t a moron; she is your wife. ~ David Ogilvy

Martyrdom: The only way a man can become famous without ability. ~ George Bernard Shaw

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I’m beginning to believe it. ~ Clarence Darrow

99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name. ~ Steven Wright

Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them. ~ P. J. O’Rourke

If life gives you lemons, then be thankful for it. I have been getting only the peels for as long as I can remember! ~ Anonymous Feared

No, no, no. I’m not insulting you. I’m just describing you. ~ Anonymous

Marriage is a bliss for people who aren’t in it. ~ Anonymous

Read: 20+ Beautiful Heart Touching Quotes Collection

I asked you for some lunch money, and you gave me a dollar? Your benevolence always touches my soul! ~ Anonymous

Oh, come on! I am not being sarcastic with you. You really sing well… In fact, you sing better than the wretched crows in my neighborhood! Damn those crows… ~ Anonymous

If a stranger offers you a piece of candy, take two. ~ Anonymous

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. ~ Groucho Marx

You’d be in good shape if you ran as much as your mouth. ~ Anonymous

Types of People Eye Roll and Heart Eyes I sometimes think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his ability. ~ Oscar Wilde

Sarcastic Quotes About Love

Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either. ~ Anonymous

When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. ~ Sacha Guitry

Sarcastic Quotes About Fake People

Shocked thick guy using modern technology Baby Girl getting a Shot Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have. ~ Anonymous

Many wealthy people are little more than janitors of their possessions. ~ Frank Lloyd Wright

Not all women are annoying. Some are dead. ~ Anonymous

This place is so weird that the cockroaches have moved next door. ~ Anonymous

Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit. ~ Billy Connolly

If you’ve never met the devil in the road of life, it’s because you’re both heading in the same direction. ~ Anonymous

Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately, it kills all its students! ~ Robin Williams

When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark. ~ Anonymous

I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it was too late. ~ Max Kauffmann

Check: Incredible Sad Status For Whatsapp

If you don’t want a sarcastic answer, then don’t ask a stupid question. ~ Anonymous

I can be quite sarcastic when I’m in the mood. ~ J.D. Salinger

Like good wine, marriage gets better with age – once you learn to keep a cork in it. ~ Gene Perret

It’s a funny thing that when a man hasn’t anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married. ~ Robert Frost

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your back pocket. ~ Will Rogers

I am in full possession of the amazing power of being sarcastic. ~ Sarah Rees Brennan

I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time? ~ Anonymous

Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it? ~ Anonymous

Sarcastic Quotes About Fake People

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire. ~ Anonymous

There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works. ~ Will Rogers

Sarcastic Quotes About Life Lessons

He loves nature in spite of what it did to him. ~ Forrest Tucker

Handsome gangster Portrait of a surprised cat breed Scottish Fold It might look like I’m doing nothing, but at the cellular level, I’m really quite busy. ~ Anonymous

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar. ~ Drew Carey

You can be whatever you want; however, in your case, you should probably aim low. ~ Anonymous

Life is like a roller coaster, and I’m about to throw up. ~ Anonymous

I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. ~ Sam Kinison

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. ~ Steven Wright

It sounds like English, but I can’t understand a word you’re saying. ~ Anonymous

Check: Attitude Quotes And Status (Latest Collection)

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. ~ Mark Twain

I love deadlines, I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. ~ Anonymous

I’m a man of leisure. That’s because I have an English degree and can’t get a job. ~ Jarod Kintz

I’ll always cherish the original misconception I had of you. ~ Anonymous

Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them. ~ Anonymous

You know there’s just one more thing to need to do after you crack a joke… Tickle the other person! ~ Anonymous

I’ve had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn’t. ~ Patrick Murray

Why would someone who has an average life expectancy of 75 years, get married when he is 29? ~ Anonymous

Sarcastic Quotes About Life Lessons

Tell me… Is being stupid a profession or are you just gifted? ~ Anonymous

Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I are not sure about the universe. ~ Albert Einstein

Sarcastic Quotes On Life Facts

Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence. ~ Ashleigh Brilliant

I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here. ~ Stephen Bishop

Marry me and I’ll never look at another horse! ~ Groucho Marx

Marriage is a romance in which the heroine dies in the first chapter. ~ Cecilia Egan

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. ~ Joan Crawford

Love is the answer, but while you’re waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions. ~ Woody Allen

Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery. ~ Erma Bombeck

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. ~ Groucho Marx

In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. ~ Woody Allen

We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops. ~ Henny Youngman

You’re not that lucky and I’m not that desperate! ~ Anonymous

Read: Sad Quotes About Life

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution? ~ Groucho Marx

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he’s a baby. ~ Natalie Wood

If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out. ~ Lawrence Ferlinghetti

Marriage is given and take. You’d better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway. ~ Joey Adams

There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than

electronic banking. It’s called marriage. ~ James Holt McGavran

Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people. ~ Oscar Wilde

Sarcastic Quotes On Life Facts

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. ~ Sir Winston Churchill

Do not worry about your difficulties in mathematics, I can assure you that mine are all greater. ~ Albert Einstein

Sarcastic Quotes About Annoying People

“Well, my imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems.”

“I’ve got a good heart but this mouth…”

“Cancel my subscription because I don’t need your issues.”

“Me pretending to listen should be enough for you.”

“If you’re waiting for me to give a shit, you better pack a lunch. It’s going to be while.”

“Ugliness can be fixed, stupidity is forever.”

“Zombies eat brains. You’re safe.”

“Are you always this retarded or are you making a special effort today?”

“You’d be in good shape… if you run as much as your mouth.”

“If karma doesn’t hit you, I gladly will.”

“Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you’ll find a brain back there.”

“Tact is for people who aren’t witty enough to use sarcasm.”

“You always do me a favor, when you shut up!”

“Tell me how I have upset you because I want to know how to do it again.”

“I’m not crazy! The voices tell me I am entirely sane.”

“Sure I’ll help you out… the same way you came in.”

“Shut your mouth when you’re talking to me.”

“I’d agree with you but then we’d both be wrong.”

“Think I am sarcastic? Watch me pretend to care!”

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“My friends are so much cooler than yours. They’re invisible.”

“If it looks like I give a damn, please tell me. I don’t want to give off the wrong impression.”

“You sound better with your mouth closed.”

“If ignorance is bliss. You must be the happiest person on this planet.”

“I’m smiling… that alone should scare you.”

“If you wrote down every single thought you ever had you would get an award for the shortest story ever.”

Sarcastic Quotes About Annoying People

“If I promise to miss you, will you go away?”

“I’ll try being nicer if you try being smarter.”

“Thank you for leaving my side when I was alone. I realized I can do so much without you.”

Sarcastic Quotes About Relationships

“Fighting with me is like being in the Special Olympics. You may win, but in the end, you’re still a retard.”

“Well, at least your mom thinks you’re pretty.”

“My neighbor’s diary says that I have boundary issues.”

“Just because the voices only talk to me doesn’t mean you should get all jealous. You’re just a little too crazy for their taste.”

“Don’t worry about what people think. They don’t do it very often.”

“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.”

“I clapped because it’s finished, not because I like it.”

“I’m not listening, but keep talking. I enjoy the way your voice makes my ears bleed.”

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“I’m not sarcastic. I’m just intelligent beyond your understanding.”

“Sarcasm, because beating the crap out of people is illegal.”

“Sarcasm is the body’s natural defense against stupidity.”

“I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?

“That is the ugliest top I’ve ever seen, yet it compliments your face perfectly.”

“Life’s good, you should get one.”

“No, you don’t have to repeat yourself. I was ignoring you the first time.”

“Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit! Yet it remains the funniest!”

“I’m sorry while you were talking I was trying to figure where the hell you got the idea I cared.”

“Just keep talking, I yawn when I’m interested.”

“Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.”

“I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and don’t want to see your ugly mug every day.”

“I never forget a face, but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.”

Sarcastic Quotes About Relationships

“Sarcasm: Helping the intelligent politely tolerate the obtuse for thousands of years.”

“Everyone has the right to be stupid, but you are abusing the privilege.”

“People say that laughter is the best medicine… your face must be curing the world.”

Sarcastic Quotes About Work

“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.” – Steven Wright

“When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark.”

“It’s okay if you don’t like me. Not everyone has good taste.”

“You look good when your eyes are closed, but you look the best when my eyes closed.”

“Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either.”

“If had a dollar for every smart thing you say. I’ll be poor.”

“I don’t believe in plastic surgery. But in your case, go ahead.”

“Are you always so stupid or is today a special occasion?”

“I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.”

“If you find me offensive. Then I suggest you quit finding me.”

“Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.”

“If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ.”

“I love sarcasm. It’s like punching people in the face but with words.”

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“I don’t have the energy to pretend to like you today.”

“I’m not saying I hate you, what I’m saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life.”

“I’m sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.”

“Sarcasm – the ability to insult idiots without them realizing it.”

“Unless your name is Google stop acting like you know everything.”

“Yet despite the look on my face… you are still talking.”

“Find your patience before I lose mine.”

“Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.”

“Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.” – Ashleigh Brilliant

Sarcastic Quotes About Work

“Sarcasm: because arguing with stupid people just wouldn’t be as much fun.”

“If at first, you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.”

“My imaginary friend says that you need a therapist.”

“Let’s share… You’ll take the grenade, I’ll take the pin.”

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