#Or something. I don't want it in ed tags but I'm talking about mine

[rpgmakers]

Bweehh

[queerweewoo]

SNIPPET SUNDAY

tagged by @kitteneddiediaz—thank you baz, my love! you can check out their latest wip HERE btw :)

mine is from one of my gazillions of wips, this one a (sort of) fake dating scenario that maybe isn't so fake for every party involved.

.

“Eddie!”

Buck somehow manages to sound like he's hissing the name as he reaches out through the crowd, reminding Eddie a little of the pregnant Rattlesnake from that one house call in Inglewood earlier in the week.

He's probably going to grip Eddie's left elbow and lean in to say something about the song currently booming through the super base-y speakers, or tell Eddie that it's his round and that Buck wants one of those purple cocktails Karen was drinking earlier on in the evening (Eddie knew Buck had been secretly eying them up).

But then Buck's getting even closer than that, all wide-eyed and wild like that spooked animal again, and rasping into Eddie's ear, “I'm sorry but please just don't say anything, alright? And just—

“What?” Eddie's hollering back, even though he heard Buck just fine.

“—just go with it and follow my lead, okay? Please, Eds, just—you gotta just play along, alright?” he's insisting, and he seems pretty harried, his forehead wrinkling in that adorable way it does when something's bothering him.

Eddie has no clue as to what the hell Buck is talking about. Buck's hands are now circling both Eddie's biceps as he waits impatiently for a signal from Eddie, and something signifying Eddie's confusion likely flashes across Eddie's face when he shoots a quizzical look at Crazy-Eyes Buck, the pair of them just standing there on the edge of the dance floor painted in alternating blues and pinks yellows by the club's swirling, neon lights.

That's when he remembers Buck asking him to play along, so Eddie gives his signal of compliance by schooling his expression into something neutral and pointedly says sweet eff ay more than nada de nada.

If Buck asked him to keep schtum, then Eddie's keeping schtum.

See, Eddie will always give Buck whatever Buck needs because Eddie is a relatively decent guy—which means that when it comes to this sort of shit, he is fairly secure in knowing he would still be serving up the whole world on a silver platter for Evan Buckley whatever the weather, even if Eddie weren't so stupidly gone on him.

He tries his best to put that thought out of his mind as he looks at Buck and makes his eyes say I get it—only it's a little more under the cover of the fan of his lashes than usual, because Buck is standing way closer to Eddie than he normally would be in a social setting (he isn't counting work).

Then everything goes stock-still and impossibly silent as Buck's fingers begin to trace both sides of Eddie's neck, each big hand now moving to span Eddie's jaw—and Eddie very much does not get it when Buck leans in, as if he's going to fucking kiss Eddie.

And then Buck is fucking kissing Eddie.

.

my tags are beneath the cut, play or nay :)

@inell @rosieposiepuddingnpie @sortasirius @angela-feelstoomuch @woodchoc-magnum @eddiegettingshot @mazzystar24 @daffi-990 @treasurehuntbuck @veronae-buddie

[kattythingz]

Attack attack attack 🕯️🥤🥐🥝🐝

Literally every one of these questions was a targeted attack, what the FUCK Jinx. But fine.

🕯️ - on a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you enjoy editing? Why is that?

Unless I'm in a bad mood and/or the premise doesn't interest me, it's actually most often a 9. Sometimes even a 10. It took me a long time to realize this (hello fiction workshop), but it turns out my passion for editing is its own beast. Something about helping others' writing. Pointing out their mistakes not to laugh at them, but to further their writing because I want to see that!!! I want my friends to see their best writing and I want to help them get there! It's the greatest honor! And, when I really get into it, it's honestly just a fun process!

(Usually. We don't talk about the fucking blood that went into editing ch4 of Crown.)

🥤 - recommend an author or fanfic you love.

MAY I INTRODUCE THE FINE PEOPLE TO @asthmaticbee's BRILLIANT HP X FMA AU "of elder, stone and cloth (of death, rebirth and closure)". THE SURPRISE RAREPAIR IS AMAZING AND I AM SO UPSET I DON'T HAVE OTHER CONTENT FOR THEM AND THE CHARACTER WRITING IS PHENOMENAL. THIS AUTHOR GETS ED ON SUCH A DEEP LEVEL. It quite literally had me high for the three or so days I spent bingeing the fic. I CANNOT recommend it enough.

🥐 - name one internet reference that will always make you laugh.

SONIC FANDUBS LMAO. My little brother and I recite them at each other all the time (I suspect it's a verbal stim at this point?), and I can't. It's so fucking funny each time.

🥝 - do you lie a lot? What's the most recent lie you told?

Jinx, seriously. What have I done to insult you lately? /j

I do actually lie a lot lmao. That's kinda a necessity in a controlling household like mine, so it uh. Kinda happens like breathing. Which is mayhaps not a good thing, but. You know. Gotta do what you gotta do. I can't remember my most recent lie, aha. (Another shining endorsement for me, ik.)

🐝 - tag your biggest supporter(s) and say one nice thing about them.

I am honestly so blessed to say—it's so many people? I can't even tag them all off the top of my head. The recent support I received on ch5 of Crown was so fucking huge, I'll forever be unwell over how nice all my readers are?? I'm so grateful to everyone.

Off the top of my head, however, I MUST specifically tag @ilovepannacotta @sirchenchen @hijinks-n-lowjinks @crystalizedirongoblin and @thewitchqueen281

Panna, you brilliant fucking bitch, you've been struggling with your art lately but you are genuinely my favorite edling artist out there. You never fail to blow my expectations out of the water, and I hope you'll agree with me on that one day. Chen, your mind is so brilliant, and your aus are so thoughtful and deep and you ask questions I never considered before that then get ME thinking. Jinx, your understanding of Greed as a character, and Al too, have quite literally saved my ass several times. Citrine, I... can't think of sth specific cuz we don't actually talk often, but your support for my yj x fma crossover motivated me so much more than you think, esp since I was in a dry spell with Crown at the time. And Avi, you've literally been my ground support since ch1 of Crown. Your early asks gave me so much hope that this revamp might actually stand a chance, and then you further devastated me by writing me a goddamn 8k fic.

I'm grateful to all my readers, but you guys esp... you did sth deep to me. And I don't think I'll be normal again cuz of it. I love y'all <3

[naranjapetrificada]

@chaotic-neutral-knitter suggested "eight predictions for eight episodes" should be a tag game and I could not agree more. You should read their predictions first because some of mine will also cover similar ground and because number 8 seems so perfect but literally hadn't crossed my mind somehow. Anyway here are my 8, which I honestly don't feel that confident about but I want to swing for the fences a bit:

I agree with OP that Ed's first scene will be crashing the wedding, but I would also buy it as the first scene of the entire first episode. Like with some lead up showing how nice all the wedding stuff is. My actual prediction is this though: I also agree that the auxiliary wardrobe's survival will be revealed in the scene we see with Ed playing with the cake toppers (💔) although I think that could be the final scene in the episode. I've made a song prediction in the past for revealing the auxiliary wardrobe but I'm not gonna put it here in case I get it very wrong lol. Rest assured if I do get it right you'll never hear the end of it.

I'm not 100% on this, but I feel like episode 2 will be when Ed goes overboard during a storm. I wouldn't be surprised at all if this is episode gives us all of Ed's Island Healing Journey, which is important but doesn't need to stretch across multiple eps given a) how little time we have in this season and b) how this show handles important backstory reveals, even for major characters. This is where Ed will have a figurative rebirth out of the sea, do some pining, and confront a ghost of captains past that's almost certainly Hornigold.

Unfortunately for the lovely parallel of them seeing each other in person in episode 3, I don't think that can happen yet on the tail of my prediction for episode 2. Maybe, maybe it happens at the very end but if it does, it won't be them running across the beach to each other (because as much as I'm hoping to be wrong, I'm starting to believe that is a dream sequence, which I can talk about in another post/send me an ask or something). [This is the one I feel the least secure about actually, and if I'm wrong I'm going to be very, extremely wrong. If I'm wrong it messes with the pacing of every other prediction on this list. If I'm wrong we'll get our beautiful scene where they run to each other, Ed will have to treat an injured Stede in The Cave, and they'll make up there. If I'm wrong I want to read a million fics about this anyway.]

I think this is when we'll meet Anne Bonney, and I don't think it's controversial to say that that scene we see of her in Stede's lap is just after she kisses him. Whatever motivation she has for kissing him will be something like making a point or proving something, most likely to whoever she looks at immediately afterwards (Mary Read maybe?). I also think whatever is going on, it will be funny because of the spit chain between her and Stede via Ed and Jack.

Anne takes the crew somewhere, probably the Republic of Pirates or following another lead? Or they come across the Revenge, and this is when they learn Ed has gone overboard. Izzy is unsurprisingly not into being captain because it almost got him killed last time, and this is the start of his begrudging training of Stede. Stede refuses to believe Ed has drowned and honestly, maybe Izzy feels exactly the same? Anyway if Izzy gets a redemption arc it starts here.

Ed has been exploring the island or doing some star navigation or whatever, and maybe he figures out where he is and a way to get to civilization again. I know a lot of people have said he's wearing Buttons' jacket in the scene where we see him with Jackie, but iirc Buttons's jacket isn't especially uncommon? Like what if he finds it on a dead body on the island? The camp looks like it's made of a lot of man-made stuff so there has to have been a wreck or something nearby. Anyway this specific part is important to me because what if it's the same episode where Stede gets his fancy red outfit? What if they both get new clothes in the colors associated with each other in the previous season? WHAT THEN DAVID JENKINS?

It would be so cruel for them to not reunite before this episode but they didn't kiss until the penultimate episode last time either. Maybe the previous episode will be what puts them on track to meet The Torturer under whatever circumstances that happens, and this episode will involve how they escape that situation. I think the aftermath of that rescue/escape will be when Ed and Stede see each other again, and I don't think they'll be falling into each other's arms immediately. This could be the party at Jackie's place though, and maybe Ed gets that fond look despite himself and later they get a minute alone to talk and that's when Stede whispers the whole "I love everything about you" thing and its devastatingly romantic and they finally fuck? But uh oh, we need the episode to end with a tiny bit of menace of some kind. Whatever is the Big Threat that's been haunting the rest of the season will be shown to not be quite vanquished yet!

We need a cliffhanger so whatever the big unresolved issue from the previous episode is will come roaring back to life. This is when we'll see Jackie wake up in bed with the Swede. If Ed and Stede don't fuck in episode 7 they will in episode 8, but it will be a much more bittersweet scene because maybe it's a "we have to separate again tomorrow to safely escape" scene or a "this could be our last night on earth" scene. It will be heartbreaking and we'll all spend weeks crying and screaming and climbing through DJ's walls, but it feels like there's a non-zero chance. If they already fucked in episode 7, we might get to have a nice romcom morning after scene as a treat, and to lull us into a false sense of security. Maybe they'll talk about their hopes for the future and be sickening (as they deserve!) before bad news arrives. Maybe the morning goes wrong because of everything still left to resolve between them and like Ed's not leaving leaving but he needs to take a walk because jesus Stede I can't believe you said that. And while on his walk Ed will learn something external has gone wrong because unfortunately, we do still need that cliffhanger. In the second act something has to get in the way of their happiness again, even if they've made up with each other (which I don't think one night can fix).

It feels so naked throwing all these predictions out like this and as I wrote I got less and less confident, especially about the order of events. But if I didn't like pain I wouldn't be in this fandom. Time to tag 8 people to do their own, assuming no one else has tagged you in the 1000 hours it took me to write this up: @saltpepperbeard @epersonae @chocolatepot @let-me-dream-with-the-stars @likethehotsauce @givefangapuppy @red-sky-in-mourning @knifeturtlelives

[julliett-warner]

Hi there, you were asking about Ozempic in the Ozempic tag and wanted to know if anyone had personal experience with it. I have and I'd be happy to share with you! I've been on it a few months now. I used to have an eating disorder. I'd be super restrictive with my calories for a couple of weeks at a time, trying to lose weight because I was obese, but then I'd give in and binge and be worse off than I was before. The best way I can describe Ozempic is that it's like food doesn't matter anymore. I used to think about it constantly. Whether that was in a dieting way, or a bingy "I want to eat a whole box of donuts now now now now" way. Like, I'd be at work, trying to negotiate with myself in my head about getting fried chicken on the way home. But from the very first shot of Ozempic it's like that little voice that always talks about food just went quiet. I no longer count calories, and I no longer binge, I just eat healthy food until I'm full, and I feel satisfied. I've lost weight, but the peace of mind was the best part. I've had a box of cookies next to my bed on my bedside table for 5 days and I have eaten one cookie from the box that whole time. I'll go to a fast food place and get a medium meal and be happy with it, I'll eat one chicken and salad wrap and feel full for lunch. I'm no longer starving myself to lose weight, nor binging. For the first time in my life, I forgot to eat lunch at work, it was like 4pm and I realized I hadn't taken my lunch break yet and I finally realized what people meant when they said "oh I forgot to eat". These skinnier people don't suffer for their weight, they feel like this, they feel more satiated when they eat. Feeling like this, eating a normal, healthy amount of food seems normal and doable. Not an impossible struggle. There are some side effects like queasiness and you have to make sure you eat lots of protein and stay hydrated, but if you have a problem with "food noise" and snacking it's wonderful for that. Slow, steady weight loss has had the bonus effect of making me feel better about my body. People keep talking about it like it's an eating disorder in a shot, but I feel differently. It feels like it got rid of mine. I hope this helps. If you are interested, 100% talk to your doctor, they might be willing to start you off on a very low dose so you can see if it's right for you.

Oh my god thankyouu so much. This is so helpful. I have binge ed and I know exactly what you’re talking about that little voice in my head always talking about food.

I have tried restricting and it always leads to burnout and binging after. I just want something to end this addiction for me.

I was worried about the nausea and bloating, but I think those things can be manageable. I will definitely bring it up with my doctor.

[just-antithings]

(sorry if there's mistakes i have pulled an all-nighter and haven't gotten enough sleep. Also, I'm the guy who once made an ask that ranted about antis in my talking planet fandom)

Bro antis love to just look at posts/fanfics that have the most clear, no-nonsense summary/tags, and then puke when the tags/summary was honest, and claim to be "literally tramuatized i am crying i wanna die!!!"

On Wattpad and AO3 i posted a fic.

And in that fic, the character Neptune humps an Asteroid named Guillermo.

(Neptune is insane and due to his loneliness and delusions he drew faces on asteroids and believed they were real, and named one guillermo for some not-needed context)

On the AO3 ver, i used the tags "Neptune/Guillermo", "male masturbation", "humping", and "sex with an asteroid". Those are pretty clear tags, i think. Therefore, people would ignore the fic because these were some clear tags, and ao3 people know how to curate their fandom experience, right?

Apperently, i was wrong since one guy was like "I haven't finished reading this but i don't wanna finish it but I'm still reading it".

Like, if you don't wanna read it, don't!

And later that guy was like

"I read your fic and i wanna die. Not saying it was bad, it was good, but in a bad way,"

I responded with a really long ranty comment about how insensitive they were, how they were practically saying my work is bad, how using suicidal thoughts as a lighthearted thing for daily use is terrible, and how they could just stop reading it.

(I then felt kinda guilty for that response and deleted the whole thread.)

On the wattpad version, since tags mean nothing, i used the summary to explain the whole fic, being as clear as i could possibly be.

i wrote as the summmary "Neptune jacks himself off with an asteroid by humping. Dead dove, don't eat! Grapefruit." And that is pretty fucking clear, right?

Since the AO3 version had people not curate their fandom experience, perhaps the Wattpad version would be better? Knowing their reputation i doubt it, but there's a chance tha-

Oh, wait, nevermind. I was right at the beginning.

While i was reading another fanfic that wasn't mine, i saw someone comment something along the lines of

"Read it and i wanna cry and die!!! Maybe it's because i just read a disgusting neptune x guillermo sm-t fanfic and that traumatized me :(((( Especially since i know how s-x works"

Like, WHAT???

I tagged and made a very clear summary, and the fanfic wasn't even bad by itself! There was no illegal activity in it at all! It was just a planet deciding to hump an asteroid. I didn't even put much detail. I used the word "southermost points" as a replacement for using cock or pussy(TBH i was just undecided on what i wanted neotunes genitals to look like so i went vague)

and why does that guy think they think my fic is bad because they "know how sex works"??? Bro, bro, bro...

No, you don't, your experience in sex ed was by puritains! If you know so much about sex, then why treat it like a cursed swear nastybadewwgross? What's with the censoring of the word? Sex ain't a swear, almost everyone has done or thought of doing. Your mum and dad did it! Nothing nasty 'bout that!

And how does knowing about sex even- What??? I'm confused about that guy. What was his point? Huh?

And my fanfic did not tramautize you! Fanfiction cannot tramautise ANYTHING! It can disturb people, but that's not trauma! Fanfiction may trigger people, but that can be avoided by clicking away, ignoring the fic, and blocking the user! I made it very clear what that fanfic was about. If you wouldn't like it, why read it? Huh?

(Also, i saw that guy comment something "It's worse when you yourself drew worse... As an artist, it's scary..." And i feel kinda bad for them. Why would people be ashamed of their own art? Why would people shame others but indulge in the same stuff? Why must things be a GUILTY-pleasure? Why could you not just be happy for yourself and your art?)

I am not holding these people hostage, i am not chaining them, and shoving my fanfiction in their face shouting "Read it!" I am just a guy who writes fetish smut.

It is not hard to ignore something and block someone. You are only chained by your consious. You are not chained by me.

Anyways, these people could see a building with big letters "Gun shop!", tons of big and small drawings of guns, the word "gun shop" written in every dead and alive language on earth, go inside anyways, and complain about the guns and how they expected candy.

Is it so hard for antis to just curate their internet experience and mind their own beeswax?

[be-ready-when-i-say-go]

Howdy, friend! An idea for a request hit me while I was struggling in the hair care department. Black/POC reader trying to educate Eddie on how to take care of his curls ?

All I have to say is YES. Let me get my hands on those curls sir. Right NOW.

Requests have resumed. You can submit yours here!

Currently writing for Eddie Munson. I write for a variety of reader inserts (male, female, gender neutral, readers of color too).

The more details you had to your request, the better it is for me. EX: “What about some fluff for Eddie after he’s had a long day?”

Feel free to look through my masterlist here!

Eddie Munson x Black Reader

_________________________

"What do you mean it takes the whole day?" Eddie questions, phone pressed to his ear by his shoulder. The fridge rattles just a little with the force of Eddie closing the door with his foot. On the counter, he tosses a few pieces of the lunch meat--chicken he thinks that Wayne got from the deli--onto his sandwich.

He'd gotten up early by his standards--around ten. He got up mostly because he knew if he didn't catch you early enough your day would become a gambit of whatever errands your mother needed to run and that you'd get tagged along.

"It takes a few hours, Eds. To do it properly."

"It's hair," he counters. "And I get yours is different than mine. But--hours? You mean I have to go the whole day without one of your kisses because it's wash day?"

You know his shock and frustration isn't directed at you or is malicious. But you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose, pushing out a deep breathe. He doesn't get it, you tell yourself. And Eddie can't know fully what it's like. He understood on a basic level but the depths he would never truly feel in his bones like you do yours.

"Yikes, I'm sorry. What did I say?" Eddie knows, even through a receiver when he's crossed a line with you.

"It's not just hair Eddie."

His full name. He definitely fucked up. "I'm sorry, hon. Those--the words, I could've said it better."

"You just want to hang out with me?" you pose it so you can understand better what Eddie really wants to say. There's no use is senseless arguing. Speaking and censoring where two things that took great effort with Eddie. Sure, he could physically talk a mile a minute, but there was a gear where the words were just automatic. You know what Eddie really wants to say and what he actually is saying are paths that could easily diverge.

"I wanted to see you today." Eddie nearly whispers it, setting the knife down as he finishes the swipe of mustard on the bread.

You worked--a by product of you graduating in Eddie's second attempt at senior year and not being in a position to afford college. So you stayed in town, helping your mother around and working. It was something Eddie dreaded. But you were working at one of the daycare centers a town over and nearly every time you and Eddie talked he had a story about one of the kids and you always sounded happy.

It worried Eddied that he really wouldn't find the thing that would make him smile like the daycare does for you. But high school, a third time, is fucking miserable. The two of you wouldn't really crossed paths post your graduation save for the occasional run ins around own and the town gossip. But you helped him with a project and the two of you became fast friends. Then you graduated. When you were out getting medicine for your mother you ran into Eddie again and his crush on you hadn't fully disapiated. Fast forward through the summer, now into the depths of October's breeze before the November freeze and the relationship blossomed.

But the realities were still there--you worked and the only time Eddie got with you was on the weekends. That is if your mother didn't snag you first and now it seemed you hair too.

The words escape you without hesitation. "Why don't you come over? You can stand to learn a thing or two about taking care of curls."

"My hair is perfectly fine."

"They are dying of thirst. Just get over here. Twenty minutes or we get started without you."

"No," Eddie wails around the frantic bites of his sandwich. "I'll be there in fifteen."

You can only laugh, listening to the way Eddie's screams are muffled by whatever it is he's eating before the line goes completely dead. He is a strange man, but you adore him regardless.

Eddie's just grateful, by the time he gets into the van, the last quarter of his sandwich in his hand, that you always extend him grace and then a little more. He feels like kicking himself after his comment. Of course it wasn't just hair. It never would be just hair--he'd seen all the intricate styles you'd weaved into the strands, the cornbrows creating a maze of your scalp that he liked to trace sometimes while you two watched movies. It always smelled good, shined a little and when Eddie asked why you always laughed a little, and said just a little bit of elbow grease is all.

Your street is only one more right turn away and Eddie is more mindful to slow down more than he normally does. Your street is busy at this time of the day on a Saturday. Kids played pick up games of basketball in the narrow street or rode bikes up and down before dumping them in someone's yard to play games of football.

Just as he expected, he can spot a game of 4 v 4 one house down from you. So Eddie creeps until he can pull up into your driveway. But the caution is all thrown out as he runs up to the front door of the house. He knocks are rapid and he bounces on the balls of his toes.

"Edward Munson," you tease, hollering from behind the door. A moment later, the lock gives and opens to reveal a grin. "Thirteen minutes."

"I lost a few seconds to finishing my breakfast."

You wave him inside and he quickly toes off his Reeboks before wrapping you up in a hug. The work coat--a hand me down from Wayne you're sure--doesn't swallow Eddie, but it is warm as you step into his embrace. He kisses the side of your head, arms encasing your waist tightly.

"Is that mustard I smell?" you ask, when Eddie exhales.

He laughs. "That's what you're worried about. The mustard on my breathe."

"It's a valid question."

"Only valid cus you got the nose of a dog," your mother teases as she approaches arms wide to give Eddie a hug too. "Good to see you again, sugar."

"Hi, Ma," Eddie laughs wrapping her into a hug too.

You expect Eddie just to watch, maybe attempt to give you a fauhawk when your hair is shampooed. But instead, he asks if you're okay with him stepping in. You and your mom had built a ritual. When she had the time, she'd wash your hair for you, deep condition it, part, cornrow and oil your scalp. It reminded you deeply of your childhood as she worked her fingers over your scalp or as you sat on the floor on a pillow as she sat behind you on the couch. But Eddie slips out of the jacket, rolls up the sleeves on the flannel he'd thrown on and ask if your mother can teach him, if he can be the one to do it.

You expect to laugh as Eddie tosses popcorn at you while you're sitting. You expect that you'll be the one to bring up to ask if Eddie will let you do a modified version of your wash day on him. But it's Eddie who breaks the seal and asks to be taught.

"I know it's important," he states. "I want to learn."

"You don't have to make up for earlier," you return, the towel already draped over your shoulders.

"I-" Well, Eddie is trying to make up for earlier. But he also wants to see and feel what makes this more than hair. "I appreciate that. But I feel like I need to get it. As best as I can of course."

Your mother easily agrees, but you keep staring him down. Those his eyes are big and you can always read them, you wonder for a moment if there's something that Eddie manages to hide as you watch him. All you feel those is genuineness.

You nod and Eddie nods, a smile gracing his face. "Thanks."

"Oh, don't say that just yet," your mother laughs. "Welcome to Black Hair 101. Detangling is going to be a bitch."

Eddie takes the outstretched comb, the teeth are tight together and a long silver need falls into his palm. "I'm going to need a picture dictionary," he laughs.

"We gotchu. C'mon. That there is a rat tailed comb. Good for parting and taking braids down," your mother directs not wasting another second.

Eddie nods, carefully taking you by the shoulder to pull you back into him. You scoot on your butt until your back hits the couch. The instruction of his hand, a titling of your head, is nearly too soft but you know what he's silently asking for.

Eddie's fingers are tentative, worried you might even say whereas your mothers hand are sure. But you like the feeling of him standing just off to the side of you as your bend your torso so your head is over the sink and his hips gently knock into your shoulder. He apologizes each time. "Nah, you're good," you state into the basin of the kitchen sink, fingers clutching the ends of the towel closed around your shoulder.

"Sorry," he whispers, fingers catching a knotted strand.

"Nah, you're good," you return.

It is a volley and each time you take hold of the apologies and return them with a soft reassurance. Eddie is good. He is okay. He is fine. He is just learning. He is just shampoo.ing He is good. He is okay. He is fine. He is just learning.

"That is a wide tooth comb," your mother direct. "Start at the ends, get that untangled first then you can go higher up. LIke this." She takes hold of a section, holding the mid shift tight and then working the comb through your ends. Once the comb goes through easily, she grabs higher up onto your hair and works the knots out before combing from the root to the ends.

Her arm is steady and swift. She knows just how much to tug, she knows when a knot needs more time to unravel the cause. She knows just when to put just a little bit more rake to get the desired result.

Eddie is slower. You can almost imagine how he's holding his breath each time his rake with the comb catches. You block the apology before it can fine. "You're fine. It's okay. It doesn't actually hurt me."

Eddie hums. He believes you, but he also knows the horrors of a bad knot.

The plastic crinkles in his hands, but he gets the cap over all your hair and tilts your head back. "Okay?"

"Perfect," you return, knowing that soon the hose will be plugged in and your mother will be setting a timer so you sit with the conditioner under heat for a few minutes.

You can only sit and watch. But the moment your mother gets the timer set, she's crooking her fingers for Eddie to follow. And into the kitchen they disappear again. You imagine it's clean up. Getting the shampoo and conditioner back up into the bedroom, cleaning out the combs, finding the rubber bands and hair grease.

But you only catch the sight of them from your periphery. But you take it. What catches your attention though, however clipped it is in your vision, is Eddie now posed at the sink.

Only your mother. You know she's fast. By the time the machine cools and then shuts off, Eddie's returning to the living room, his own hair dripping and resting against a towel. "She got you too, huh?" you laugh.

"I blinked and my head was under the faucet," he laughs.

You mother motions for you to scoot, and you do after peeling the cap off your head. Eddie takes your spot. "Just a couple minutes for you, sweetheart. Nothing too long."

He barely gets the nod before his hair it tucked up and way and the heat billows around his skull. Your mother is swift as she rinses your hair out and then the dryer turns off by the time the two of you can return to the living room.

"Should've brought a snack," Eddie teases, watching from the floor as your mother parts your hair.

"Told you it was called wash day."

"You hungry?" he asks, one hand resting on your knee. HIs thumb brushes over the exposed skin--thanks to the rise of your shorts due to you sitting.

"Nah, I'm good."

"This whole time I just thought you rinse conditioner out right after you got it through your hair," Eddie snorts.

"Lawd, have mercy," you and you mother echo. The room fills with cackles, a sheepish grin taking over Eddie's face.

"No one told me otherwise!" he defends. And it's true--Wayne most likely wouldn't have known. But now Eddie knows. Like he knows how to take down the cornrows. He knows how to shampoo, and detangle. He knows what sort of products you need. He'll figure out which ones are best for him later. He understands how to do a braid, but is sure, that his fingers won't cooperate. He almost wants to ask to try but the way your mother tugs and tucks, he fears he'd interrupt too much.

"You look like you wanna say something," you state, fingers tracing up Eddie's clothed calf.

"No, just watching," he answers. It's a lie. You both know it. But not even the arch of your brow gets him to confess.

Just as your mother plucks the last rubber band from the box, you unscrew the top on the jar of grease and hold it up. Your mother takes the pad of her fingers to take a small swipe, warming it up on the back of her hand before swiping it on your scalp. She follows the lines down and down to the nape of your neck.

Eddie peers in at the blue substance. His nose places the scent--something he's always connected to you-- but he never really knew what it looked like. It's jelly like, but easily pliable with a few rubs. He takes a taste amount, just dipping his pinkie into the jar.

"Just don't eat it," you laugh, watching Eddie inspect it.

"I doubt it would taste great," he concedes. You wave him in close, reaching for a different jar. He can't make out what it is, but you rub the cream between your palms and smooth it over his strands. You are careful as you finger coil clumps. It smells sweet. He catches the smell when you reach around his shoulders to take the towel.

"All done?" he questions.

"All done," you answer, pulling his head back by his forehead and kissing the end of his nose. "You hungry?"

Eddie peers to the clock next to the TV. Ten to three. "Shit, now that you mention it, yeah. But I see what you mean by it takes a whole day."

"Absolutely. We've got leftovers. Is that okay?"

"Sounds perfect."

"Give you strength to get hair products later. That'll be fun."

"You mean it's going to take another four hours," Eddie laughs.

"We have to get it right!" you defend.

Eddie stretches up, rubbing at your forearms. "I like the sound of that."

[dumbbutchmutt]

Pinned 📌

⚠️🚫 MINORS DO NOT INTERACT! THIS BLOG IS FOR 18+ ONLY. 🚫⚠️ You will be blocked on sight for interaction. Age in bio/pinned (Doesn't have to be exact, but better say youre over 18. I'm not fucking around. You will get blocked.)

I'm Gideon, I use She/He/They pronouns. I am NB and I am a Man and a Woman so don't put me on your men dni blogs, and don't touch me if you think men can never be lesbians.

You can also call me Daddy/Mommy if you're into that (Only as a title). I am a Soft butch and a switch, and I just really want a place to go to vent my horny. I have two wonderful partners (My boygirlfriend here: ☆) who I adore so I'm not looking for more, I just like flirting and being a little bit of a whore.

I'm over 21 so don't be shy (Unless you're under 18!!!) Interaction encouraged via the inbox otherwise. If you message me in dms, I want to talk first before flirting. I am not your personal dom. You can send photos, but I don't do photos of my own, so don't ask.

Claimed anonymous emojis: 🐝 | 🙈 | 🤔 | 🫐 | 🐍 🐶 | 🌿 | 🍓| ❤❤❤

Kink talk and Taglist below ���️

Kink talk:

I absolutely not do: Scat, Piss, Cnc, r4pe, inc3st, dmlg/dmlg or other variations, detransition kinks, race, or slave play but I have the tags blocked so I can avoid it if you still are interested in other things on here, and interact. Don't put any of these in my inbox they will be ignored and you will be blocked.

I definitely do: Praise, Degrading/Humiliation, Teasing/Edging, Spanking, Breeding, Petplay, Bondage, Hair pulling, consental somno, Daddmy/Mommy/Sir/Ma'am as honorifics.

-

Taglist

gbftag: Tag for my partner / h tag: Tag for my partner who isnt on tumblr / talking/anonymous: Ask / mine: Post I made excluding ask / Daddy tag-Mommy tag: Stuff where I'm called or use those / soft somno: Somno tag, because I don't do rough somno / nsft vent: Vent post, not everything about my hypersexuality is sexy.

Everything of mine is free to reblog except for my vents.

T-rfs/R-dfems dni, fuck you specifically I will block you. On that note, fans of that h/p shit get away from me too. It's made by a T-rf.

Ed centered blogs please don't interact, I don't hate you that's just something personal I can't have around me.

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

I just want to recap this whole situation from my POV actually because I think it would be useful at this point. And I actually want to start in 2014 on instagram during the spam ig era. I was a homestuck cosplayer on spam insta when I was 13 and dealt with the 4 chan raids, if anyone remembers those. So that's my background, just so you know. I got called a retarded dyke by proto gamergaters during my formative years, and it effected the way I engage online.

Anyway, hard cut to when I watched OFMD in April. I deeply related to Ed as a character. Most of my fan engagement for the first month or so was on tiktok, but I got off of it and went back to my social media of choice, Tumblr. I saw a lot of fucking Takes TM that I hated from a certain contingent of the fandom and I was critical of them, and so I started posting my own reading. Here's where the situation starts

I start posting my own reading of the show and I tag the characters that are in the show, hoping to find people who agree with my reading so I could follow them. I got yelled at for """maintagging""" which is an issue I've only run into before once, and the people who got mad at me about the """maintagging""" I received some agressive anons which I promptly deleted. I posted my Ed is Izzy's abuser post (tagged Izzy critical), got more aggressive anons, which I deleted for the most part. Had to tell some people how to block the Izzy critical tag. Cemented myself firmly in the izzy critical camp. I continued to see Shit Takes, in fact since the Izzy is Ed's abuser meta I've only ever made my Izzy metas in response to Shit Takes. I got on Calico Jack twitter, which I don't go on twitter all that often, and there's a lot of overlap between Izzy twitter and CJ twitter unfortunately, so that made me less likely to use twitter at all. I was mostly on there for the porn, so it's cool. I didn't interact with discourse hardly at all so twitter didn't feed me anything related to this.

Now over this period of time the situation on tumblr was getting completely unhinged actually. You couldn't post anything at all in the Izzy tag without someone crawling out of the woodwork to tell you that you were terrible for it. People did slowly learn to block the Izzy critical tag, but jesus christ it was a slow learning process for yall. Every day I'd get on here and post silly little posts, and then one of mine or my mutuals posts would be a little bit too mean to Izzy, and by a little bit too mean it would be something objectively true. And then people would just descend on it and there would be another fucking drama. And it's impossible to predict what's gonna set you off.

Now one drama was completely unrelated to Izzy at all. Stede Anon as we've been calling them, L as they've been referred to in that document showed up in june, left a few nasty anons, and then fucked off because the people that they were bothering turned off anon. Then they came back in October to bother me I played with Stede Anon until I got tired. I wished them a Karkalicious 2009 and sent them on their way.

Another drama I want to recap, which I hesitate to call a drama because of the racist under ... well... overtones is the "documenting of the Izzy haters" a couple of people made a whole sideblog dedicated to documenting the worst of the "Izzy haters". Except they didn't start out with the twitter doxing, or L/Stede Anon. They started out with a mutual of mine who is a black woman and who talks about racism in fandom. She has never harassed anyone to my knowledge and has had quite a bit of nastiness directed at her. I had heard some whisperings of potential harassment being directed at Izzy stans, and I had remained firmly out of it. This blog was too much for me. If they were dedicated to documenting the nastiness they were receiving in fandom, and their third post was about someone who posts metas and minds their own business, then there must not be real problems, especially since I'm catching all this fucking flack for simply posting things that aren't even mean. It may just be that I grew up on the internet but I can be real fucking mean, and I haven't been.

One instance of this is the Izzy isn't canonically queer drama. A mutual of mine posted that Izzy isn't technically confirmed as queer, his queerness is all subtext, that might be an interesting thing to analyze. Things got heated on my dash for a while. Since may there's been a problem in the OFMD community where people get yelled at for posting Izzy critical. And after a long argument with a certain Izzy stan in regards to the post in question I posted this because I was genuinely curious. Basically the argument consisted of us talking past each other, where I said "No one is calling Izzy straight we're just trying to analyze another facet of his character" and they said "You're doing harm to x y z group of Izzy enjoyers by saying that he's straight, and you're doing harassment." On that post that I linked I got told by one person that that post was "Doing harm" and that "hurt people hurt people" which is frankly the most absurd application of that phrase I have seen to date. I got told by a different person that I shouldn't have posted that because "izzy stans are receiving a targeted harassment campaign, worse than anyone else in the fandom" This was the final straw for me. If they think that that post is doing harm, they cannot identify harm. I made a passive aggressive post about curating your experience, blocked anyone who got mad about it, and my tumblr experience has been a lot nicer since I did that, because people blocked me and I blocked them. Everybody's happy.

So anyway then Stede Anon returned with a vengeance. My working theory is that this person is in school and they're on winter break and have more time to be a huge bitch. They accused me of being an Izzy stan I said "nice try you fucking idiot" in a way that was sort of dry, and I said Izzy stans have paper thin skin, and I refuse to loose sleep over them getting mean anons, but you still shouldn't harass them. That response got screen shot and lied about. Because of course it did. I was an idiot for thinking it wouldn't. I stand by what I said but if I could go back I would have been nicer I guess just because it would have caused me less drama. Some Anons came into my inbox and said hey you're a fake ally and you don't care about harassment and I was confused where they were coming from but essentially I said. "Girl, it's an anon" and then someone directed me to uselessheretics blog. And so I go check out the anon harassment that's got yall so worked up. And do you know what I see there? It's fucking Stede Anon!

So for a couple weeks I've been getting these vague messages about harassment and when I finally get directed to the harassment I see an anon that I have been fighting with and have blocked because of how fucking annoying they were. This, Stede Anon of Stede Anon Gate fame, is the unique threat facing the Izzy stan community. So of course I had a fucking field day with it. All of our fandom problems originate with this one shithead and I am going to hold hands with T*zzy*zzy and sing Kumbaya as we all collectively banish Stede Anon to the shadow realm. Hit that block button babes

And then today someone posted the link to the google doc receipts. And I realize now that there's actually been some harassment unrelated to Stede anon happening on twitter, and Stede Anon has been a real terror on IG. So perhaps I jumped the gun on casting doubt, but I maintain that I would not have said anything if not for certain people behaving completely out of pocket and crying about harassment on posts that are not harassment.

And I do want to address that actually. The reason for this whole thing, is because certain people are dragging up the harassment to try to get us to stop criticizing them. The undertone to all of this is very clearly "we're being harassed so you have no right to criticize us or talk about our blorbo in a way we don't like," which doesn't feel related, does it. I've seen the arguments that "they're using your rhetoric" but the thing is you're pointing me to a couple deeply mentally unwell people who I have no control over and you're saying "you should feel bad about this because you made a meta post about your reading of fictional characters that I didn't like" and getting mad when I'm confused that has to do with anything

So basically i retract my assertion that you're not being harassed, but you can clearly see how I got here, and also you keep bringing this harassment up to me in situations that have nothing to do with the harassment. And if you had fewer shitty takes I would make fewer metas.

I also do maintain that L/Stede anon is the source of most of our problems and we should be using the block button prodigiously

Here's how:

[palavapeite]

@aha-my-villainous-thoughts tagged me in the Last Lines game thingie. Thank youuuuuuu!!!!

Not quite sure how that works, but since I haven't touched any of my WIPs in a month and also have a bad habit of not writing from start to end necessarily, I'm just gonna have to wing it, won't I? For some of these it's gonna be the last sentence of the draft/manuscript and for some the last bit I remember writing. Also, it is highly likely that more than half of these will never actually get written, some of these files are more like thought playgrounds than actual WIPs.

From oldest to newest, here we go:

Blonde & Leggy 3: [Subtitle redacted]

Stede’s mouth keeps talking – thankfully, on the subject of Ed he can keep talking for quite a while without having to think about what to say next – but his thoughts are already elsewhere. 

This won’t do. 

It simply, he decides, won’t do.

[I am afraid this is where the fic's been stuck for months and everything past this is a construction site because eeeeeeh I'm having some problems with flow and figuring out the right order of scenes and events. ]

(Did you expect a love song?)

Seeing Dion and Anton exchange a look, Viago grinned awkwardly in a manner that he hoped conveyed how much of a fucking embarrassment he thought Deacon was (not without affection), just in case there was any doubt.

[I really really want to finish this, I just need to find the voice again and it's not been happening for me...]

What is left for encore

“Power metal, huh. Well… I like the sound of the rest though. Nothing I trust as much as Izzy’s taste.” 

“Right?”

[aka the metal band AU I will never realistically actually write/finish. but i've been nostalgia-watching so many of my fave band documentaries and this is the WIP file where I go to vibe, alright?]

Your smile is like a breath of cringe

Glancing around his cabin, he was relieved to see that Izzy had left unnoticed sometime in the past three to thirteen minutes that Ed guesstimated he had been staring out between the drawn curtains.

Time to get ready for battle, he figured, and looked around for his gun and his knife.

Fine. He was fine.

This was fine.

[@thebeautifulsoup and I were both going to write a Jason-Isaacs-as-Stede's-rebound-boyfriend fic, but she was the only one who actually pulled through with this beautiful fic. Mine got kneecapped by seasonal depression and self-doubts, so it's just been... sitting there.]

Bonnet's Playthings: Brothel, Baths and Bed & Breakfast

This was how Stede Bonnet found out that he had been having breakfast with Blackbeard. 

[This could have been another silly frenzied 10k in two days, but then I got bogged down in, like, scene 3 and I've not yet made up my mind on how to best fix it.]

The not-technically-a-wip-more-of-a-notes-and-snippets-cluster

"Not really. More like…" Stede releases a shuddering breath. "Like I was wrong. I came out as gay thinking it would set something inside me free, make something inside me finally make sense, but then life went on and I still felt trapped, and I thought maybe I’m not gay at all, maybe I’m just broken."

[I don't think this will ever come to anything, but I might harvest some of those 5 pages of dialogue if ever I need something depressing...]

AND THANK FUCK THAT'S ALL OF THEM, I BELIEVE WITH REASONABLE CERTAINTY.

This was fun! Tagging, if they haven't already done it (I've seen this float about recently) and only if they feel like it: @slow-burn-sally , @thebeautifulsoup , @emmyllou , @pudentilla and @greaseonmymouth :-*

[imogenleewriter]

15 Things About Me

Shout out to @faithinwalls369 for the tag. I'm actually writing the final chapter of my fic this week which I've been really quiet about, and literally none of my mutuals on a discord server know about because I'd never mention something like that, so this will be brand new information to those mutuals.

Anyway, I made the decision to make sure I take breaks from writing it and rambling here seems like a perfect break so buckle in friends.

Are you named after anyone? 

My cousin's middle name is Imogen.

When was the last time you cried? 

Lol. When I wrote the A/N on the last chapter I posted which was like a day and a half ago. And before that it was earlier that day when I was talking about a sad fic. But I'm PMS-ing so that would be why.

Do you use sarcasm a lot? 

Yes, but I wouldn't say it's my main mode of humour. I looked into once because my little research brain needed to know all the types of senses of humour there were. I'd say mine is 'self-enhancing humour'. Which is like self-deprecating humour except I think all my 'negative' qualities are hilarious. .

What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Probably what they're wearing. Not in a judgemental way, but just, I think it tells you a lot about a person.

What’s your eye colour?

Hazel. But I met my husband through a mutual friend and we were at a music festival and for some reason Brown-Eyed Girl was playing and I was like 'I have brown eyes' because I'm amazing at flirting but now he insists I brown eyes even though they are definitely hazel.

Scary movies or happy endings? 

Happy endings unless I don't want to sleep for a week straight.

Any special talents? 

Convincing myself I have every life-threatening condition that exists. Surviving on an average of four hours of sleep a night. Publishing 215,000 words in ten weeks.

Where were you born? 

Australia. In the same city I live in now.

What are your hobbies? 

...I wrote 215k words in ten weeks, I don't have time for hobbies. Only hyperfixations.

What sports do you play/have you played?

I've played football (soccer), basketball, dance, swimming and I was terrible at all of them.

Do you have any pets?

Two black cats - Theo and Luna, and a black lab puppy, named Oreo.

How tall are you? 

165 cms.

Favourite subject at school? 

I only really did the whole schooling thing to socialise and I left when I was sixteen (but ended up going to uni after) I did best in English and Drama. I'm good at non-calculator maths but my brain couldn't cope when we were expected to remember complex formula's. In year 10 (so like 15-16years old) my maths teacher hated me (because I did fuck all) but I was in one of the top classes and he literally said he had no idea how I was in there. But our first exam for the year was non-calculator and I got top of the class and it was one of my proudest moments. I also enjoyed Biology aspect of science and I was good at the Health/Physical development aspect of PE/H/PD (although that was mainly because I was an autodidact when it came to sex-ed). But then, years later I got my Degree in a health care field.

Dream job?

So... when I was eighteen I created a bucketlist and the very top of it was to publish a book... and I didn't care how it was published, I just wanted to be able to write something and have people read it... and guess what? This week I am writing the final chapter for a 200k+ word fic that people have actually read. But I also love my other job that actually makes me money. Honestly right now I feel like I've reached the self-actualisation level of Maslow's hierarchy of needs... so I can only go down from here. And I've leave you on that pleasant note.

<3 <3 <3

[neptunetiger33366]

Not sure if screaming into the void will help my social anxiety or make it worse, but suppose it doesn't hurt to try. Not expecting anyone to read this, but want to put something out. So I'm just going to type and let what happens happen.

Y'all can call me Neptune (not my real name ofc), and I'm a just a queer furry nerd that can't help hyper fixating on stuff. I've actually had this account for a few years (I think, not good with time) but never used it. Got brought here by the one and only P.M. Seymour, but because I was never able to get the app, never really used it. Now I'm older, getting into fandoms on here, and am actually taking the effort to learn how Tumblr works. From what I know, I think I'll like it here, and one of the big rules I've been told is to never have an empty blog, makes you look like a bot. Normally I'm a lurker online, but I suppose that'll have to change here. Hence this post.

Anyway, as you can probably guess, my fursona is a tiger (actually what I call a tiggon) named Neptune. Tiggon is my way of denoting a tiger dragon hybrid. I know a tigon is a thing (tiger lion hybrid), so that's why there's two G's. Neptune was actually a name I considered while choosing for myself (I'm trans masc), but decided it worked better for my water powered fursona. Once I figure out how to use Krita properly and get some art done of him, plan on posting here about him. Plan on eventually making him my avatar, but until then, it's Wild from Linked Universe because he's my FAVORITE bean.

What else? I'm a writer (sorta, don't write much, just a small hobby) and love making OCs. Debating writing publicly about them, but for right now I'm not publishing anything. May change in the future once I finally work up the nerve. It's funny really. I'm a very "it's okay to be cringe, let people like what they like" person until it comes to my own work. Then it's all cringe and I'll be put to death for coming up with it. Ah, social anxiety and general self-esteem issues, my beloved. Right now I'm working on two fan-fics, one involving a TotK/AoC AU of mine and the other an AU of my TotK AU. The AU of the AU is inspired by an AU from a fic I've been reading, which is in and of itself an AU of a different comic series I've been reading. So... A fanfic of a fanfic of a fanfic involving three or four separate AUs? Huh, that's a lot of of's. Either way, neither of those is ever getting published, lol. Hell, they're barely getting written as is. Curse my inability to focus.

Anything else of note to share? Yes actually, but I think that's best saved for posts of their own. I'm done with that kind of sharing for now. My point in making this post, besides not looking like a bot, is to tell the void I'm new to it. I'm learning how things work. Etiquette around tags and reblogging (which stresses me the fuck out for no reason. I have this weird part to my anxiety where I absolutely DREAD being late. This is the worst in its "oh, I took too long to respond to that text, now I have to wait for them to text me again" form. This never works and ruins all my friendships. Despite repeated assurances that that's not an issue with reblogs, they still trigger that anxiety.) I make mistakes and don't talk a lot, even online, but I'm willing to learn. Will try to make it a habit to post things, but no promises. Might get better once I get more used to being on here. We'll see. Anyway, it late/early at the same time and I really need to get back to the real world. My favorite Link is waiting for me. We just 100%ed TotK (quests, Koroks, compendium, monster medals, and map) and I'm helping him create a full recipe book as celebration. My man loves food, gonna have to feed him big time after collecting 1001 pieces of shit. Goodnight Tumblr. We'll talk again.

[o0-crystalcleartears-0o]

🥀Intro post or smth idk🥀

[plain text: intro post or something, I don't know]

About me

He/they

Bisexual

ADHD, probable autism, OCD and NPD

Not sharing my name but you can call me L

Pro-Palestine

Anti Israel but NOT antisemitic

I believe Transandrophobia is real and just as bad as transmisogyny

ACAB. My blog isn't a barn so if you're here to lick the boot of some pig you'll have to go elsewhere

Warning

Please DNI if talk of self harm, suicide, depression, intrusive thoughts, homicidal ideation and/or death upsets you

I will be using trigger warnings only if I remember to, so this is your warning

About the blog

This blog exists so I can have a spot to vent about my issues and be mentally ill without upsetting my irls or moots on my main blog.

I'm not sure how active I'll be here, and I don't even know if I'm gonna keep this blog for all that long anyway.

Tags

He speaks ✨ -> my original posts

Suicide posting -> post of mine that talks or jokes about committing/wanting to commit suicide

DNI:

🪦 Zionists 🪦 transphobes 🪦 homophobes 🪦 trump supporters 🪦 antivaxers 🪦 people who believe in narcissistic abuse and similar shit 🪦 Nazis 🪦 racists 🪦 TERFS and Radfems 🪦 anti furries 🪦 pro ED/thinspo blogs 🪦cops 🪦 you get the idea 🪦

[cakesexuality]

Okay, so, healthcare update!!

Isn't entirely "estrogen is slapping" material but I'm using that tag anyway!!

I gave an update 2 days ago (Monday) for 8 months Lupron, 1 month add-back where I said the receptionist was gonna get back to me about who my anesthesiologist was

I called again yesterday (Tuesday) and found out I hadn't been referred to any specific anesthesiologist but rather to the pool of anesthesia doctors at the hospital and the hospital would pick a doctor for me rather than getting one my gynecologist had in mind (which, I've had this experience with psychiatrists before where I get referred to the department as a whole and the hospital assigns a doctor to me, as opposed to my GP writing a referral for one specific psychiatrist, so it made sense)

I got the call today (Wednesday) from the pre-admission clinic saying that they have a spot for me to do my anesthesia consult!! I'm going to the hospital in a couple weeks for the consult and hopefully they deem it safe for me to have a laparoscopy!!

I talked to my dietitian today about my ED and as well as about my Lupron

She's going to reach out to the first ED program I was referred to bc she's confused as to why they said the things they said (like weeding out the foods that make me sick before I'm allowed to start treatment) and she's concerned about them acting like I'm a one-off unusual case bc she says she has multiple other clients who have eating issues that come from the same place that mine do (looking for control in relation to a chronic illness), plus I signed a consent form for the hospital to contact my dietitian (who asked me to let the hospital know she wanted to be in contact with them when she found out I was referred back in February) and she never heard from them

Since I didn't start add-back until 7 months on Lupron and you're not supposed to be on Lupron longer than 6 months without add-back, we talked a bit about my bone density and I'm already taking a vitamin D supplement, so she wants me to spend a bit of time tracking how much calcium I eat in a span of about 3 days in order to decide if I need a calcium supplement too, and she said that if doing the math myself is too triggering then I can just take pictures of the nutrition facts to email to her instead

Literally one of the goals she assigned me is to order delivery!! She was happy to hear about a couple months ago when I kept getting overwhelmed with options while ordering food online one evening but pushed through and got myself a lil pizza treat and I was proud of myself for doing that, so she wants me to try that again and to challenge myself like that more often

Another goal she gave me is to have frozen meals in the freezer to help cut down on decision-making for times where I can't push through the overwhelm I might feel around having to create a meal

I also got a call this week from a 2nd ED program who had an assessment appointment for me for June, but then the receptionist realised I'm not able to get to their clinic in-person, so she's going to double-check with the intake worker to make sure there weren't mistakes about who they serve and to find out if I can do it either from home or from an OTN room in town here

ALSO today, I got a call from the hospital where I had a psych appointment go wrong a couple weeks ago where I spoke to the patient relations person as well as the head of Mental Health

The head of Mental Health tried to say that the doctor didn't want to give me a depot bc I have MDD and they're for people who have a hard time staying on oral meds but like... I have more than MDD, we don't know what exactly but clearly something else is there if I'm having psychosis outside of depressive episodes... and yes I am taking my oral meds but it's a fucking STRUGGLE to do so on too many nights (like, taking until as late as 2:30am sometimes to be able to convince myself and then my sleep schedule is all off from delaying my Seroquel for so long) and it just so happens that my AP is usually the most difficult one to get myself to take

And then I asked what the psychiatrist's receptionist meant about telling my diagnosis to a drug manufacturer and the head of Mental Health said that that's not a thing and there would be no reason to disclose that to a manufacturer and that the receptionist was making stuff up

I'm gonna be talking to my CMHA worker tomorrow and we're gonna work together on a letter describing my psychotic symptoms to give to my doctors to help them understand what I'm going through bc of the fact that my psychosis doesn't fit the way other people are telling me it is (like whether it's exclusive to my depressive episodes or how long each psychotic episode lasts) and I feel like I didn't explain it very well to my GP when I saw her last week bc I wasn't prepared to have that conversation and there were a lot of symptoms I couldn't immediately think of off the top of my head

[the-precious-sugar-chan]

Welcome! Have a cupcake 🧁

✩. ·͙ *̩̩͙ ˚̩̥̩̥ *̩̩̥͙ 　✩　*̩̩̥͙ ˚̩̥̩̥ *̩̩͙ ‧͙ . . ·͙ *̩̩͙ ˚̩̥̩̥ *̩̩̥͙ 　✩　*̩̩̥͙ ˚̩̥̩̥ *̩̩͙ ‧͙ . ✩

※ Hi! I'm Rox (or Sugar, call me whatever). I'm a fandom veteran. I talk to the wall, I translate sometimes, I simp a lot. You'll figure it out.

※ First of all, this is not a serious, super organized blog, it's my personal blog so you might see random stuff more often than not, lol. But sometimes I post something coherent! If that ever happens, I'll add it here.

※ I will use the tag #Sugar Opinions for things such as debates or opinions I'd like to share.

※ I tend to ramble endlessly, so if you don't want that amount of nonsense, block the #;Talking to the wall tag!

※ While this blog is not strictly +18, I am so such content may be present. The tag for it, if you want to block it, will be #;Non-Sugar Free (with the ; ).

※ Even though I mostly reblog stuff, feel free to ask me to add a specific tag.

※ Please be civil, the world is already insufferable enough.

Fandoms and random posts of mine below!

☆゜・。。・゜゜・。。・゜★

💕Fandoms

Diabolik Lovers [Games/Manga]

Kuroshitsuji/Black Butler [Anime/Manga]

Higurashi series [Anime/Visual novel]

Kpop [No specific fandom, but ATEEZ, Mamamoo and Taemin by beloveds]

OC/RP Community

I'm mostly active in DL fandom (especially the OC side tbh), but I enjoy the others a lot from the sidelines ♥

☆゜・。。・゜゜・。。・゜★

🦇Translations

Here's a list of the translations I've done in the past and for the future ones to come! I have re-written many of these to fix a lot of misspelling and grammar mistakes in the broken English language. Feel free to let me know if you have any suggestions or requests!

Listed from newest to oldest. It's not much, but it's honest work (?) ♪(´▽｀)

—Diabolik Lovers "Meow Meow Vampire" Short Messages [Sakamaki] [Mukami, Tsukinami & Kino]

—Diabolik Lovers "Zero" Floor 7. Kino -Mini drama-

—Diabolik Lovers "Farfalla Lucio" Fragrances -Masterlist-

—Diabolik Lovers "Dark Fate" Mukami Azusa Route [ Ecstasy 8 ] [ Ecstasy 9 ] [ Ecstasy 10 ] [ Ecstasy Epilogue ] [ Vampire End ]

—Diabolik Lovers "Lunatic Parade" ED: VoiD -English Lyrics-

—Diabolik Lovers "Bloody Bouquet" -Story-

—Bad Medicine: Infectious Teachers ED. "Déjà Vu" -English Lyrics-

※ I've deleted the Bad Medicine route translations I've done, I wasn't feeling good about them. Luckily, there are some translations for the game out there now!

☆゜・。。・゜゜・。。・゜★

🎇Other Posts

—Yui standing up for herself (ft. Yuma)

—Close-ups of DL Stage play actors [Ayato, Shu, Richter] [Laito, Subaru, Reiji]

—DL Characters dodging the question about their age

—DL Shitposts | Subs. | Sakamaki-flavored | Mukami (dis)approved | when kino

—Wtf is Kino [based on canon lore] [theory of mine]

✩. ·͙ *̩̩͙ ˚̩̥̩̥ *̩̩̥͙ 　✩　*̩̩̥͙ ˚̩̥̩̥ *̩̩͙ ‧͙ . . ·͙ *̩̩͙ ˚̩̥̩̥ *̩̩̥͙ 　✩　*̩̩̥͙ ˚̩̥̩̥ *̩̩͙ ‧͙ . ✩

[yaffles-world]

Okay so this started as a reponse to an ask game, but it ended up being Long, so I wanted to post it separately... Also it took like an hour. I felt like it works better on its own hehe.

Also, I know I coulda just posted it as fanfiction but this is very personal to me? Like... I didn't wanna just change it to an x reader. But I don't mind what y'all do in your own head of course. Plus the only person who reads this is @irummna - if your somehow reading this, you've probably also seen their content their more popular but if not GO CONSUME.

❤️ [HEART]- What did the confession look like between you two? Who initiated it? Where did it take place?

Relationship status: pending

Relationship length: barely

The Confession

I had come aboard with them about a year prior, after I happened to bump into Jet, an old friend from many years ago. I was looking for a change and came on board with him, Spike, Ed, and of course Ein, on the Bebop. I'd never met Spike before but I very quickly developed a crush on him. I mean, who wouldn't, he's young, he's cute, he's charismatic.

He's a slacker and Jet is a bit of a hardass… It felt like I was always getting in between the bickering arguments that they had. Jet is a great friend and frankly, a lot of the time, he was in the right, but I couldn't help but take Spike's side. Spike would get all gloaty and proud and come up and wrap his arm around me and say "See! Jamie agrees with me!" And I'd blush real hard… Spike never noticed it, that I know of. Jet would though and he would fix me with a hard stare that said "you knew I was in the right! What is going on with you?" And I would just look away because I didn't want to admit that I liked a guy like Spike.

Slowly, casual touching became more common place. I still had no idea if he liked me back, though… It's Spike, it could just be flirting. Lots of him getting kisses from Ein, the dog, and saying stuff like "you jealous?" And like… accidental walk ins on the shower. It was a solid month of flirting before I realized I should hit the brakes… Crippling self doubt set in. I thought no one can possibly like me, certainly not Spike. Talking to him was too painful, so I didn't.

That's when Jet came in. He sat me down and asked what was wrong and I told him. "Listen, it personally grinds my gears seeing you two all flirty and joking around with each other... But it's so much harder seeing you barely look him in the eye." Jet explained. "I think you kids need to sort it out yourself, but... I think you'll both be better off if you're honest with each other."

Just like all of Jet's advice, I decided to ignore it. I was miserable, but I was sure Jet was just being nice and that being honest would only make it all awkward and painful. Until, one day, Jet was out with Ed, leaving Spike and I on our own. I was reading a book, feeling a little down. I missed Spike. I missed even being a friend but it was too hard because every time I saw him I just fell for him harder.

Spike came over, lifted my legs off the couch, and sat down under them. I asked what he was doing, he made some quip about me taking up all the space, and something must have shifted in my face because he asked if I was alright.

"Quite frankly, no, I'm not," I replied, with a sad smile.

"Well, we can't have that then!" He put on a music record, and pulled me up to dance with him. I blushed deeply and tried to save face as we boogied down to one of Jet's records. I started to laugh, he laughed, it was actually going okay. But then there was a slow song and Spike pulled me in close. I pulled back, firmly placing us apart with arms extended. "Come on, we're not related!" He joked and pulled me in closer.

Queue blushing.

I was stuck looking into his eyes, and worst of all, he was looking back into mine. He wasn't making any jokes… we were just standing there. Swaying slowly. He was so god damn beautiful.

You know how some people see something like the grand Canyon, or a beautiful piece of art, or the ocean, and it simply moves them to tears. It moves them because of how wonderful it looks, how amazing it is that you and that thing not only exist in the same timeline, but can see each other, you can walk in that sand and swim in that ocean. That's how I felt, drowning in his deep, brown eyes. Drowning in his presence, drowning in the irreparable despair that no matter how much I loved the ocean, the grand canyon, that piece of art, no matter how much I loved him, by their nature they could not love me back.

And then we kissed

I couldn't tell you who kissed who… I don't think it matters.

It was soft and gentle but also firm. He held the back of my head gently. We pulled apart.

Queue blushing.

"Did you... mean to do that?" I asked, hesitantly.

Spike grinned widely, smiling wider and with more joy than I'd ever seen before. He nodded. "Yeah, I sure did!" He pulled me in again, more passionately this time, holding onto me like he never planned on letting go, our lips crashing against each other. Making up for lost time.

The door opened, suddenly. "Finally!" Jet shouted. "I'm glad you kids worked it out!" We pulled apart, the kiss broken from smiling, as Jet clapped us both on the back.

And we've been together ever since.