#Or saving it for last because 'that clearly won't/hasn't worked so now what?'

[thedawningofthehour]

In tandem with my ramblings about doth being an actual separated au instead of a 'Donnie thinks it's a separated au' au and some conversation with @dryad-druid about that and Big Mama being an actual mama-yeah, I think I've thought up a pretty cool au idea.

(this is long. you will regret this)

So the classic Donnie gets separated from his brothers, Lou takes the other kids in the divorce and Draxum gets left with Donnie, but unlike other separated aus, Lou very clearly sees Draxum save him from the flames. But Lou's hurt, choking on smoke, holding three babies and Draxum is holding his baby and OH YEAH HE'S LITERALLY IN THE PROCESS OF MUTATING. Lou has to flee for the safety of his other kids.

But he fought Draxum and took the turtles for a reason, and every moment he spends with his three babies just renews his conviction. He can't let Draxum keep even one of the turtles, and he will not leave his child to the mercy of that monster.

He needs to return to reclaim his last baby...but he barely got out alive the first time. Not only that, but he has three little lives that depend on him now. Even if he was successful, they couldn't be left alone for long. And he cannot fail. He can't leave his purple baby with Draxum, and he can't leave his other children alone.

So he returns to the Battle Nexus. He tells Big Mama he'll stay, he'll do whatever she wants him to do, provided two things: she provides for his children, feed them and educate them and keep them safe from anyone who might try to harm them or use them for their own ends, including herself. And second, help him reclaim his child from Draxum.

Big Mama is ecstatic. She has Lou back right where she wants him, his boys are just the most adorable turtles she's ever seen, and she really doesn't like Draxum anyway. They get married, she gets the boys birth certificates or whatever and sets them up in luxury accommodations, and hires mercenaries to capture Baron Draxum and his remaining creation and bring them to her-unharmed, she stresses. The baby must be kept safe, at all costs.

Meanwhile, Draxum just watched his entire life's work go up in flames as he was violently divorced by the guy he sort of-totally had a crush on, who was also the father of his kids and kidnapped 3/4's of them, and is now left with whatever meager possessions survived the blaze, his gargoyles, and a single turtle.

And yes, this turtle fusses constantly and keeps pulling his hair and doesn't let him sleep for more than two hours at a time, but...he, weirdly, really enjoys it. Yes, he's exhausted and hungry and hasn't been able to take a leisurely poop in a week because the second he sits down someone starts to cry, but when he stares up at Draxum with those big eyes while he takes a bottle, when he refuses to settle down and fall asleep until he's in Draxum's arms, he just...can't help it. He's completely taken with this kid. He'd do anything for him. He's all that Draxum has left.

So when the bounty hunters come looking for him, intending to take his son away, Draxum runs.

Homeless, penniless, not daring to use even his name, Draxum goes into hiding with only what he can carry on his back and the baby in his arms. He unfortunately has to get rid of the gargoyles-he won't be able to pay them and they're too stupid to keep anything a secret, plus they sucked as nannies. So they go back to the gargoyle agency, and Draxum goes off into the night.

Hiding in the Hidden City proves difficult, considering there's only so many goat Yokai, and Big Mama's goons are nothing if not thorough. I thought maybe he could live in some fantasy-esque cottage out in the middle of the mushroom forest or something, and maybe he does for the first few years, but as Galois grows so do his needs, and he becomes increasingly harder to keep hidden. So Draxum retreats to the only place left he has a prayer of disappearing into-NYC.

Life on the surface is hard and forces Draxum to deal with-shudders-humans, but he soon finds himself benefitting from their kindness. A coat draped over his shoulders when the temperatures start to dip, leftovers from a restaurant worker who is supposed to throw them away but puts it all in a to-go box instead. He likes to think of it as fate, choosing the alleyway right outside their apartment the night before he was stumbled upon, but after the shock had worn off the couple was eager to help him, and neither they nor their daughter April treated his son any differently.

The O'Neils help Draxum get a settled in a recently vacated apartment in their building and things begin looking up. Galois and April become attached at the hip almost immediately, and though neither of them completely understand why Gale has to stay hidden, they listen to the adults. Draxum can pass for human even without his cloaking brooch, so he gets a part-time job in the evenings to at least cover some of what the O'Neils are doing for him. April goes to his apartment when she gets done with school and he watches her until her own parents get home, and the O'Neils watch Galois while his father is at work.

It's not perfect, but they have so many more opportunities on the surface. April struggles in school so Draxum offers to homeschool her alongside Galois, and her parents agree to do that for at least her elementary years. When April is twelve and Galois is ten, Draxum gives him his own cloaking brooch so he can attend middle school with her. It comes with a long lecture on how he can't let anyone know his secret, that Draxum was asking a lot from the both of them, but he felt like they were mature enough to understand how important it was.

So they go to school, then come home and learns alchemy and Yokai history from Draxum, Galois sets his curtains on fire multiple times performing experiments in his bedroom, and always seems to be learning a new subject from Youtube tutorials. Draxum gets a day job as a lunch lady and starts thinking about getting a human degree, so he can go back to doing science things or practicing medicine. Two decades ago he would have recoiled in horror if someone showed him his future, but he finds himself...weirdly content.

MEANWHILE. The rest of the boys grow up in a life of luxury, tailored clothing and endless servants and world-class tutors. Lou settles himself into being Big Mama's part-time champion and full-time trophy husband. True to his word, he does whatever Big Mama asks of him, so long as it doesn't compromise his sons. He fights, he smiles and poses for the press, he sleeps in her bed when she wants him and makes himself scarce when she doesn't. And he does what he can to ensure his boys don't get too spoiled. Taking care of them is the only thing in his life that makes him happy now.

But the deal he made with Big Mama chafes him at every turn. She said she'd never force his children to fight, but when Raphael begs her to put him in some of the smaller, no-kill fights...well, that certainly wasn't against the terms of their contract, and how could she ever say no to one of her turtley-boos?! Leonardo is clever, far cleverer than any of his nannies or tutors, with a skill in manipulation that would put most car salesmen to shame. Not to mention he's definitely the most handsome of his sons, with his bold markings and charismatic personality. Big Mama delights in parading him around, using him as arm-candy when Lou isn't available. And worst of all, she's taken to teaching him business at her side. She fixates on Michelangelo as well, but Lou can't really find anything to object to when she hangs up his artwork and brags to her dinner guests about their meal being planned and cooked by one of her sons. Still, he keeps his last baby close, so she'll have all the more trouble finding something to exploit in him.

All the while, he can't bring himself to truly be angry with Big Mama. She took him back, kept him and his boys safe when they needed it. She's his children's mother, they love her, look at all she provides them. He was the one that left those loopholes in, he was the one who failed his sons. He was the one who left one of them behind. He can't be angry with her, no.

But he knows who he can be angry with.

So that's how he passes the years. Watching his wife exploit the children she claims to love, reading report after report of every failed mission to locate Draxum and his missing child, taking his fury out on every mercenary that returns without them. He thinks about his last baby, what hell their life must be. How they must feel, knowing their father left them with a monster. He thinks about Draxum, the source of all his misery, who has eluded him and kept his child captive for thirteen long years. Lou waits. He plans. While inside him, a simmering hatred plants its roots deeper and deeper, and slowly begins to boil.

[silverwhittlingknife]

Dick resurrecting Bruce via Lazarus Pit and his reasons for doing so left a bad taste in my mouth. Especially when Dick tried to talk Tim out of it. I don't like it. I wish Tim found out about it and... Had a serious discussion with him? Hit him? Left? I dunno.

Oh man, it's hard for me to talk about this one without the Doylist approach. I'm gonna come back to these panels, but I just want to leave them here as a contrast between how Dick is written in his solo vs. how he's written in Batman and Robin:

Dick: Tim... I ... where does it stop, right? What about your mom, then? My mom and dad? Bruce's...? (Nightwing 139)

Dick: This isn't just "loved ones," Alfie. It's Bruce Wayne, the Batman. He saved our lives, he saved the city and the world how many times? (Batman and Robin 9)

I have SUCH complicated feelings about the Morrison Batman and Robin run? I like a lot of the Dick-Damian-Alfred dynamics, and I love the idea of villain!Jason as a major antagonist for DickBats, and I love what I think is the concept of the Lazarus Pit arc, which is that Dick's slowly crumbling under the pressure of being Batman and Jason's taunting is the last straw that finally pushes him to make a terrible mistake.

But I don't like the execution of the Lazarus Pit arc, and the disregard for big chunks of post-Crisis continuity and characterization is sooo frustrating. ("I don't like to plan"/pro-Lazarus-Pit!Dick, cartoonishly-evil!Talia, redhead!Jason, etc.)

And yet. AND YET. So many of the concepts are so good! The execution is so messy, but the concepts are so good! I want to tear it all up and then put it lovingly back together but different sdfdsfs

I had a lot of thoughts, so below the cut:

Why characterizations in B&R are a huge departure from previous continuity (Doylist version)

Why the Lazarus Pit arc COULD BE SO GOOD though (and how we can make it work with Watsonian reasoning)

Finally getting back to your question - how would Tim react? (tl;dr probably with concern and worry?)

Characterization Changes

Just to give you a bit of an idea of how abrupt a departure B&R is from Dick's solo, here are some panels showing some major changes.

1) Dick on Lazarus Pits: Pro or Against?

Here's Dick arguing against using the Lazarus Pit and telling Tim it won't bring back the soul in Nightwing 139:

Here's Dick doubling down on the evilness of the Lazarus Pit when Ra's taunts him with it post-Bruce's death in Nightwing 152:

But here's Dick arguing that the Lazarus Pit will be fine and that he doesn't believe in "prophecies of doom" in Batman and Robin 7 (and indeed, also in B&R, he'll kill and resurrect Kate with zero consequences - convenient!):

2) Talia: protective or cruel?

Here's Talia worrying about Damian's safety and teaming up with the Batfamily to try to save him from Ra's in Resurrection:

But here's Talia smirking after telling Damian they're enemies now and she's going to replace him with a clone in Batman and Robin 12:

3) Dick and planning

Here's Dick-the-planner in Nightwing 142:

Tim: That's a lotta ordnance. Dick: Failing to prepare is preparing to fail.

But here's Dick the impulsive leap-before-you-look guy in Batman and Robin 9:

Dick: ... Okay, I'm sorry - I don't like to plan, I work without a net... I'm not Bruce.

4) Resurrection: the right choice or the wrong choice (part 2)

Here's Dick telling Tim he made the right choice (not trying to resurrect anyone) in Nightwing 139:

But here's Dick insisting that resurrecting Bruce would've been the right choice in Batman and Robin 9:

This is one of those "clearly some people were writing angry letters to the editor" moments sdfdsfds, because it's awkwardly attempting to address Dick's abrupt about-face but the writer still hasn't read the issues in question because

a) Alfred has no way of knowing Dick's previous stance and it's incredibly weird that he would, b) "cautioned against" the Pit is a lot milder than "had a fist-fight with Tim about it," c) Dick's argument has shifted from "the Pit is an eldritch evil that's untrustworthy and probably soulless" to "look, resurrection is a special thing, and not all loved ones are important enough for resurrection," which, uh, okayyyy, and d) Dick is still full-naming "Tim Drake" as if he's a business associate and they had an argument about how to properly file paperwork and now it looks like Tim Drake was right after all, as opposed to Dick's little brother that he had a huge fight with and who subsequently ran away from home insisting that their dad was alive and that he was gonna prove it and now it turns out their dad is alive

Why This Arc Could Be Great Though

Listen, Dick-driven-to-the-Lazarus-Pits is a great concept. I love narrative foils. I love Dick ending up in the exact same place that Tim was in Resurrection, and even though he knows better. I love Dick being that desperate. Here's the setup:

Damian's back gets broken, Alfred takes him to get emergency treatment from Talia but it's not clear if he'll recover,

villain!Jason taunts Dick about not caring about Bruce,

Dick's been slowly crumbling under the pressure of being Batman and between the guilt of Damian being injured and the blow of Jason's accusations (not to mention having to fight villain!Jason and get him arrested), this is the last straw,

he decides to resurrect Bruce even though he knows perfectly well this is a terrible idea because he was the one who talked Tim out of it

he heads off to do this incredibly stupid thing and nobody stops him because normally on the rare occasions Dick's out-of-control Tim shows up and stops him (Hugo Strange, the Joker) but Tim isn't here and actually the strain of that ongoing estrangement is probably also contributing to Dick's isolation and terrible decision-making

the attempted resurrection goes horribly and Dick has to fight a grotesque parody of his tragically-dead father

I love this idea!! I love it when characters make stupid emotional decisions with terrible consequences!! I love the ways Dick and Tim's arcs intersect and parallel each other!!

And I think this could absolutely be in-character for Dick. He knows it's wrong and a bad idea, but he's desperate and pushed to his limits and grasping at straws? Yeah. I can see it.

BUT yeah, not in love with the execution. My conclusion is that more people should write about this arc in fanfic. <3

How Would Tim React?

I think it depends on where you put Tim in the story?

Options that come to mind:

Tim finds out mid-adventure: Tim's semi-teaming-up with Ra's and underground in a League base - and suddenly he stumbles on Dick sneaking in with (apparently) Bruce's dead body! In this case, I think Tim's first reaction is defensiveness about his own behavior and assuming he's being spied on, and it only slowly dawns on him that Dick's up to something. I'd really want to somehow maneuver a physical fight where Tim tries to stop him, so you get a direct reversal of Resurrection, but mmmm I'm a little stuck on how to get there since Tim's working theory is that the body isn't Bruce's body, so I don't see why he'd be opposed to Dick dumping it in? But anyway, they should have a physical fight and a direct parallel where Tim realizes he needs to back off and let Dick decide, and then they hug ;_; I feel like to make this one work you need Tim really invested in stopping Dick, so uhhhhh maybe for some reason Tim's "rescue Bruce from time" plan requires the body of the clone? So Dick CAN'T put it in the Lazarus Pit, or Bruce will be LOST FOREVER?

Tim gets told about it after the fact: So uhhh for example, Ra's finds out about Dick's botched resurrection attempt and tells Tim about it in an attempt to paint Dick as a hypocrite/ entice Tim into using the Lazarus Pit. I feel like Tim would just straight-up not believe him? But let's say that Tim finds out for sure - either Dick admits it to him, or he sees some League recording, or whatever. I'm not really sure how Tim would react? Worried, probably, because it's out-of-character, and I feel like Tim might wonder if it's really him or if he's under magical influence or something? And uhhhh then ideally Tim realizes that no, it was because he was having a really hard time ;_; and then Tim is worried about him and comforting and/or apologetic and probably Dick is probably also apologetic and then they hug <3.

Alternate third terrible possibility: it is Bruce's body, he was dead and Tim was just in denial, Dick resurrects him but there are some kind of eldritch evil consequences, and then Dick has to call Tim back and they have to fight undead!Bruce together. I like this one >:D

[winterswhite]

Some of my thoughts after rereading the A3! prologue:

Resisting every urge to point out interesting things I'm noticing in A3EN's localization of the prologue with 3.5 more years of Japanese knowledge, this is a reading club, not a translation club

Why is this the only instance of pink text in the game? I think it's really funny how they highlighted important lines in pink here and then proceeded to never do that again

Logistically I know it was only done here as a way of introducing the player to things and it has no real place anywhere else in the story, but it's still funny

Tsuzuru not catching on about the street act is so cute www

I love how you can tell from this very first interaction between Tasuku and Haruto, and then between Haruto and Tsuzuru, that Godza is a kinda messy environment behind the scenes

In retrospect, this was so fucked up of Izumi's mom (I didn't think anything of it back then, but with the knowledge I have now... whew)

hE RECOGNIZES HER

"KYAAAAAAAAA"

BACKHOE

I think it's so interesting that Sakoda was able to get a permit for the backhoe? It's something so small but I think it's fun how we see here that he has the skill needed to safely operate heavy machinery even though he's often seen as someone who isn't good at much of anything, so it really just comes down to his life circumstances more than his actual ability (I mean the kid's just being taught to read at a third grade level, and it's not his fault)

Pictured: The moment it was over for me

This whole scene is such a mess

The way Sakyo implies there have been other plays recently?? If this is Sakuya's first show, how did those work?

Oh Sakuya sounds so awkward it's hard to watch. Shoutout to Sakai for achieving that

Izumi's thoughts as she watches Sakuya perform hit different knowing about her own failures and experiences with theater

This line always, always gets me. Hard work alone doesn't amount to crap in this world. It never did for him. His mother worked so hard and yet they were poor, he worked hard and could never achieve his own goals... hard work never earned him anything. If it did, maybe he could've stood on this stage, too. Maybe Mankai wouldn't have reached this point. Maybe we wouldn't be here.

Honestly, everything here shows how much Sakyo loves Mankai and how hurt he is too

This conversation between Sakyo and Matsukawa is so much, they both care so much about the theater but Matsukawa is so desperately latching onto it while Sakyo has resigned himself to its fate, he's all but given up (just like he has on himself lol <- in pain)

Oh boy Yukio mention (the way he haunts the narrative is so much)

It's funny that Sakyo takes that jab at Matsukawa for wanting to lean on Yukio and count on him to single-handedly save Mankai, considering what he just said about hard work. If Yukio can't be relied on as the "savior" of Mankai (all the actors need to come back and everything needs to be the way it was before) and hard work alone won't do it either... he really has lost hope

Sakyo you fucking tsundere

You're the boss, boss!

Something something Izumi about to lose the last connection she has to her father even if it's not one she ever really had much of a part in before

Oh Izumi you're so bad at this

Sakyo is Not taking this (meanwhile, Matsukawa...) I do appreciate how he still gave her a chance though, however small it was

Honestly I feel bad for Matsukawa here, knowing how he's been trying so desperately just to keep the troupe afloat for eight years even though it clearly hasn't been going well

Obviously there was no way to fit this into the English localization, but I love how Sakuya introduces himself and then tells Izumi how to spell his name in kanji because of the many different ways it can be written (花の咲くの咲也です！)

I also really appreciate Izumi as a character and how real she feels right from the very beginning, from her interest in theater to her hammy acting to her quick thinking skills

Matsukawa you've been at this for years... (also I'm curious about Izumi's old troupe)

I didn't care much for Sakuya when I first read this story, but knowing all that I do about him now, this is all so endearing... he's so sweet in how he's comforting Izumi and checking in on her (and his whole thing about not wanting to lose the troupe hurts)

"Might as well fail like men!" thank you for the encouragement Matsukawa

I honestly think there's so much to be said about Masumi's character right from the beginning, like with him repeatedly asking how his acting was

Tsuzuru the biggest "struggling uni student" mood

Oh Masumi's line about just taking anyone hits so different in Japanese... Maybe I'm just not as good at picking up on certain types of slang and innuendo, but his wording is so much more... questionable in Japanese, that double meaning cannot be ignored.

Oh god I'm thinking about the A3 timeline again. I will once again try to push it back into the furthest depths of my mind because there clearly is no such thing as "time" in this universe and trying to figure it out has given me headaches before.

[seethesunny]

4 what is the plot bunny you've been carrying for the longest? optional bonus question: do you ever wonder why you haven't written it yet and experience deep existential dread?

33 do you start with the characters or the plot when writing?

90 do you notice your own voice in your writing style?

Fanfic Writer Ask Game

Hey Ameera! Thanks for passing by :)

4. What's the plot bunny you've been carrying the longest? Do you ever wonder why you haven't written it yet and experience deep existential dread?

Okay so this is kinda tricky because I HAVE played with this concept before (it's one of my favorite things to write), but the "Ellie is Tess and Joel's bio kid who Tess gave away without telling Joel and things happen like canon requires au" Tess POV retelling fic has been a plot bunny of mine since ages and it's been in my head like a little parasite buuuuut nothing has come out of it? At least not being this /canon adjacent/, that's what I mean!

For starters that idea would be overdone by now (and I'm sure people more talented have tackled it well enough) plus mine was also a mix of a Tess origins fic; she's technically Anna in this, or at least that's what Marlene makes Ellie believe, and she's tied to the fireflies while this is all a secret to Joel and only Tommy is aware but he leaves anyway.

Both Joel and Ellie are clearly oblivious, but Joel connects the dots the farther they travel and Tommy confirms this when they reunite + Marlene was supposed to tell the truth in an attempt to get Ellie back and have the cure (you can't let Tess’s sacrifice be in vain, Joel) yet he doesn't spare her life. The last part is going to be recycled for a segment in whumptober, though.

So it hasn't been made and probably won't be made at this point, I can't promise it will 😅 if you want to be devastated the line: "She gave life to Ellie, and gave her life to save her." Is what Joel thinks while he carries her to the car, and he feels no remorse in keeping their daughter alive and safe.

Also you can have this thingy from a random note app between my grocery list and wifi password:

"You know about your parents, girl?" The teenager shakes her head, avoids her eyes, "Marlene never told you anything?"

"Anna." Tess is so confused, but doesn't need to ask when it clicks; a fake story, a lie just like her own reason to give this girl away. "She only told me my mom was named Anna."

They keep walking, Joel is still ahead of them. She sighs relieved.

They will never know.

It's a bit sad, but it's for the best.

33. Do you start with the characters or the plot when writing?

Characters first, then plot! If I have no idea what characters are doing and adding to the plot or how they're supposed to fit, then I can’t work at all haha this is why in my outlines I need to specify their importance to the story so it feels satisfying, you know? It's also that my stories are character centric and they're my main focus 🫠

90. Do you notice your own voice in your writing style?

Annoyingly so! Like I said previously, the more I write, the more I influence everything, and that's very distinct to who I am 🫡 I hope it doesn't come off as pretentious but sometimes you kinda notice those small details only after you've written it, and you understand it's very you.

[general-kalani]

I wonder, how does everyone feel about Dep. Hadassah joining Eden’s Gate to save the last of their team? Anyone feel betrayed or anything?

{ Hudson } "Thought they were fucking crazy. Joining THEM?! After everything they've fucking done? Of course I feel betrayed. But we're gonna come back later with fucking. Armed forces or something because that shit was crazy."

{ Whitehorse } "I know they were doing it for the best outcome possible. But I can't help but feel betrayed as well. They're the enemy to join them it's like bein' a turncoat. Just hope they're treatin' her right."

"... Worried. The cult is fucking manipulative. Even without the Bliss I... I-I can still feel that influence, that maybe they were right and it would've been better to go with them. I... I'm conflicted for sure. I hope they're safe that's all. I hope Joseph hasn't wormed himself into their fucking mind like he has mine."

"Worried. That's my fuckin' cousin after all, anythin' happen to them I'm blamin' myself. And... Iunno, maybe Jacob too. Told Jacob t'take care'a my cousin and he does this instead. Fuck..."

"Dep did what? With those FUCKIN' PEGGIES?! Oh nah that's a rescue operation! Come on Carmina lets fly!"

"Well, I just gotta burn shit that ain't the Deputy now. Clearly they forced them to join their shit and they had no say! That ain't cool man!"

"I... I-I hope they're alright. Jacob's done so much to them already I can only imagine how Joseph works. The thoughts of whether they've been hurt already by that madman are terrifying to me. I can't... I don't want that to happen. I can't bear the thought."

"It was a good choice to keep their people alive. But there are those that will not see such an action as righteous. Instead, they'll see it as betrayal and the such. I worry for the Deputy however. That cult's done a lot worse. I've heard they haven't been injured since they joined the cult but it won't be easy to not be worried twenty-four-seven for them. Their survival will be in my prayers."

[vervainvoyage]

Oof. This event is making me dislike Yoimiya.

I know lots of players like Childe, and you have every right to like whoever you want! This is not about his personality at all. But from the in-game perspective, he's a Fatui Harbringer- of the same Fatui that routinely kidnap children (Dottore's experiments on Collei and the attempted kidnappings of Vimara Village children, to name the in-game cases, and in the manga they also demand a tribute of children to be delivered from Mondstadt). And Yoimiya invites this guy to an outing with children, fully knowing that he's Fatui? Girl. Girl what the fuck. "Ah yes, General McSpy of the Yakuzalike Organisation, I'm sure he's a great babysitter for this school trip"

Traveller tries to warn her and she goes "oh but he was nice once, and hasn't hurt me personally, so clearly it can't be true that the Fatui are so dangerous" GIRL. I SWEAR TO THE ARCHONS.

Soooo yeah I do not have a high opinion of Yoimiya now. Regardless of how interesting a character is from the players' perspective, once you estabilish certain things about them, they have consequences. Childe being a known Fatui operative carries its weight, and when Yoimiya disregards it like that around the children she claims to be caring for, it just shows her in a very bad light. Oh she says "Don't worry I won't let my guard down" - as if she's so certain she can singlehandedly take down a Harbringer. Whatever the gameplay shows, plot-wise a fireworks seller should not be able to last against a Harbringer (because I'm sure someone out there beat Childe's boss fight with only Yoimiya already, but then again according to the game a theatre dancer is a 5star but the Tianquan of Liyue is not, so lets focus on the plot here and not the gameplay). So here's one of the big bosses of an organisation known for using lies, subtrefuge and trickery, who just so happened to save a child from danger... and now the children trust him... what a coincidence?

In conclusion Yoimiya, not knowing Childe well at all, is taking huge risks here that threaten not just her but the kids under her care, and she should never date, since she has too much of an inclination to ignore red flags. And when the Traveller tries to warn her, based on their own experience with Childe, and of how Fatui basically work on false pretenses and trickery, she ignores it.

[thevindicativevordan]

What do you think of Superman leaving Supergirl in an orphanage?

Guess this is the weekly review thread then!

Batman/Superman #8 - Of course I grinned in glee at Waid referencing that old Silver Age continuity of Clark dumping Kara into an orphanage because raising her himself would jeopardize his secret identity! Clark was a real dick back in the day and I am in favor of canonizing pieces of that. Waid is building a canon Neo-Silver Age in the book that I'm enjoying a lot, he and I see eye to eye with regards to Kara's characterization. She's traumatized and compensating for that trauma with aggression, but that means she's the one who reaches out to David when she sees he's hurting because she knows what to say (or at least she thinks she does, David's situation is clearly being built up to be partly his fault). Key was used well here in a way that made him a credible threat, Batman teasing Robin about his failed date with Supergirl was funny, and I'm actually eager to see the Joker get involved.

Nightwing #97 - Solicits made it seem like Dick would propose to Babs but that hasn't happened yet. I'm wondering if plans changed at the last second, or if it was just solicits lying as they sometimes do. Maybe issue 100 will be the actual proposal? I don't really enjoy the way Taylor writes Dick and Babs together, but like it or not DC seems committed to those two are the OTP, might as well pull the trigger on it.

Batman: One Bad Day: Penguin - First one of these I can give a thumbs up to! We get a compact Penguin origin, we get a focus on his relationship to Gotham and Batman, and we get to see what he believes is his role in the status quo. Penguin is a character defined both by his brains and by getting lucky which Ridley did a great job showing as we follow Penguin climbing back to the top from his starting point of having nothing but one gun and a single bullet. Bit of an asspull that Batman would let Penguin and Umbrella Man fight each other to the death for control, that's a "I won't kill you but I don't have to save you" moment which you can either accept or it will ruin the story for you.

I Am Batman #14 - Now here is where the lucky breaks Ridley employs didn't work for me, Jace accuses a guy of murder with no evidence and instead of just brushing him off the guy tries to kill him. It's too convenient and doesn't feel believable, Ridley needs to start developing Jace as a detective because Jace sucks at it, and I don't think Ridley realizes that.

Batman: The Knight #10 - Batman: Year One is the best entry for Batman comics as a whole, but this strikes me as the best jump on point for the new era that Tynion kicked off and Zdarsky is continuing.

Black Adam #5 - I am actually excited to see Batman show up in someone else's comic. Unbelievable. Priest's attempt to provide a "realistic" explanation for the gods stalking Adam and Malik is convoluted and hurts the book, DC's cosmology is a pain in the ass to wrap your head around already, just make them gods Priest instead of sentient bacteria that evolved into gods because of Adam... being afraid and the Dark Multiverse reaching out to make his fears real? Can't wrap my head around it and Priest tends to love making things ambiguous that would be better off simple. Adam and Malik are entertaining nonetheless, and given Malik is in Lazarus Planet and the DC Power oneshot, maybe I was wrong about him dying after all. Do feel bad that Sandoval is getting poached but Eddy Barrows is a great replacement.

X-Men #16 - So Synch and Old Woman Laura will go back into the Vault and stay there as Guardians over the Children right? Feels like that's where this is going. Must admit I'm disappointed Duggan is the one finally addressing this particular issue over Hickman, Ewing, or Gillen, especially since this was an issue Hickman had seeded from the beginning of the Krakoa era.

Miracleman: The Silver Age #1 - Finally after all this time we're getting this series. First two issues are reprints with new art, and I gotta say it looks gorgeous.

[kitkatwinchester]

I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS!!!

GOD poor Stiles!!!

I FEEL SO BAD FOR THIS MAN!!!

THIS IS SO NOT FAIR!!!

HASN'T HE BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH??!!

I mean...

The fact that he's been through so much is I'm sure part of the reason the Nogitsune was able to get in.

BUT STILL!!!

IT'S NOT FAIR!!!

I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT!!

"Maybe he thinks he's part of an unsolved case." "Or is an unsolved case."

STOP IT!!

STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT!!!

And then he freaking recognizes the symbol for "self" in the basement, like, immediately, I CAN'T!

If it was ANYONE ELSE, he would've TOTALLY SOLVED IT!!

But he CAN'T solve it, because he's fighting with himself to solve it, and it's NOT FAIR and I just...

WHY??!

WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO HIM??

TO ME?!

TO US?!

AHHHH!!!

That said.

Lydia and Aiden being there when Scott and Isaac get there and all of them catching each other up gives me hope but also hurts my heart even more because they all clearly love and care about him so much.

And Aiden with the "you all remember she only gets these feelings when someone's going to die, right?" and Lydia immediately like "you promised not to call his dad. I didn't." I just...

I NEED STYDIA TO GO CANON! THIS SLOW BURN IS KILLING ME!

Also Isaac being the one to say the thing that everyone is thinking but no one wants to say with the "evidence of insanity" and Scott coming in with basically "I don't care, save him first, solve this later" is just...

I LOVE SCILES SO MUCH!!!

WHICH IS WHY I HATE ALL OF THIS SO MUCH!!!

WHY ARE YOU TORTURING OUR BOY LIKE THIS?!

WHY?!

...yeah these are pretty much exactly what the reaction posts are gonna be filled with for the next six episodes until we finish this godforsaken season that I simultaneously love and hate more than anything I've watched thus far.

...anyways.

PLEASE SAVE HIM!!

PLEASE!

And I know you won't but PLEASE STOP TORTURING MY BOY!!

WHY TEEN WOLF?!

WHY?!

*cries*

(THIS IS LITERALLY HOW I FEEL RIGHT NOW AHHHH!! :'( :'( :'( :'( )

Update: The way Noah is so close to freaking out, and works so hard to take some deep breaths and calm himself down and school his emotions so that he can treat this like the missing person case that it is instead of like the missing SON case that it is I just...I can't.

Update Part 2: The way freaking EVERYONE UNDER THE SUN is looking for him and is so concerned I just...Melissa's face and urgency when the group walks in, Derek's heavily schooled concern at the realization of Stiles' struggle ("With who?" "Himself."), the worry on Isaac's face when they hit another dead end, the entire police station on such high alert and clearly worried...the ONE THING the Nogitsune has going against him by picking Stiles is that he is the LAST PERSON that ANYONE would let something happen to, and they are gonna find him and save him from you you F*CKING SON OF A B*TCH, no matter WHAT it takes.

Update Part 3: LYDIA FOR THE WIN LET'S F*CKING GO!!! YES GIRL!!! THAT is how you hone your abilities!! I'M SO PROUD OF YOU!!! LET'S GO GET HIM!!! LET'S F*CKING GO!!! ATTAGIRL LYDIA!!!!

[mostly-vo1d]

Wait I have a steo wild hunt au that still gives us the why wouldn't I remember Stiles scene. Time travel.

Everything goes exactly as planned, the pack remembers and gets back Stiles. Stiles and Theo somehow end up fighting together when one of the riders gets both of them at the same time. But because magic is funny like that (read: whatever the dread doctors/the nogitsune did to them turns the hunt's train station dimension into wibbly wobbly timey wimey nonsense) they end up both alive 3 months earlier.

And promptly get taken separately by the wild hunt again.

So we not only get both of them being forgotten, we also get Theo being the one telling Stiles he was the only one who really remembered him.

[merakiui]

I love the dilf serial killer Jade agenda but I can only imagine how hard it would be for reader when the child starts growing up. Idk how much Jade would reveal to them or desensitize them, but if darling is able to raise their child so that at least some part of their brain can process things normally, it would be heartbreaking for the child to learn the truth that mommy and daddy weren’t in the loving relationship that they were raised to believe. The times whenever mommy would stare at them, even if for just a moment, with fear in their eyes the more they grew up. Why mommy didn’t like meat and refused to feed them meat whenever daddy was away. Jade can’t keep them inside forever and eventually they’ll need to explore the world, and reader both anticipates and fears this day. On one hand this will give the child the opportunity to broaden their horizons so they won’t be influenced by Jade as much, even though Jade loves them from the bottom of his heart who knows what he’d do to them down the line. However on the other hand they pray that they didn’t release a possible mini Jade into the public who would inflict the same kind of torture and suffering like his father. And I think readers biggest concern is now that the child isn’t the main concern/focus anymore, what happens to them now?

I think Jade would take the child to the sea first. They'd be introduced to mer society before they ever step foot in human society. As they were growing, you would read all sorts of fairytales about the land and ocean to them, and Jade would tell them stories from his own childhood as he reminisces his youth. It didn't take long for tales of merfolk and colorful sea creatures to capture their attention and, through years of story-telling, your child falls for the ocean's charms. After all, not every child can boast that their parent is a mer. Jade promises to take them to the sea once they're old enough. You'll have to come with, of course. He can't leave you chained in the house for such a long time.

Besides, if you're staying with his parents you won't get very far. Most merfolk love to meet humans because the opportunity to do so doesn't come up as often as it should. And since you aren't accustomed to a tail, you'll have to rely on Jade to help you navigate through the water. Be grateful he doesn't let you sink to the bottom while he helps your child swim.

Although underneath this seemingly normal family exterior, there's always the thought of what happens next. Jade's been generous enough to let you be part of the child's life for so long now, but you're certain his patience can't last forever. You're too worried to broach the subject, so you remain quiet and are relieved that you're allowed to live another day. Since he hasn't raised a blade to you yet or put you into a deep slumber, your escape plans might work. The only thing holding you back is your child. They caught you one night, reaching for the door knob, and were so confused when you quietly and frantically explained that it isn't safe.

Your child could only frown, not quite comprehending why you'd ever want to leave Jade. He's the best dad in the world. Hearing that admission from them turns your blood to ice. Perhaps it's selfish when you wish to save yourself from this nightmare. You just can't figure out how to save your child when they so clearly look up to Jade. It's truly heartbreaking.

[aashi-heartfilia]

BnHA 323: Why is Uravity the most overhated character in MHA?

Okay then, let's go!

If I have to say that Uravity is the most overhated character in MHA it won't even be an opinion, cause it is a fact.

Especially after this chapter…

Recently, Ochako's popularity is on a steep decline because some very vocal haters and shippers on twitter came up with various invalid and bogous argument that it is hilarious!

This girl isn't playing around anymore and she has got back her spunk from the sports festival and I kinda liked to see that but what made me sad was the fact that many shippers took it as some IzuOcha moment rather than ‘Save Deku' and started ranting in a chain of bullsh*t comments about her saying all she does has to revolve around Deku, yada-yadei...

Like seriously?

In terms of even character, I dare say that Ochako is more independent than Bakugo. Heck, his entire development theme revolves around Deku in one way or another then why when it comes to Ochako it is always treated as romantic or even wrong in a way?

And then there are other people saying:

“Oh anyone could have done what she did!”

Tell me one thing!

Who else was even suitable for taming the mob?

Teachers?

Who have failed to save their students over and over again?

Heroes?

Who are basically the Top 10 and people like Endeavour can't even hang around in public without a disguise!

Bakugo?

Who has matured now but still won't be able to convince the entire bunch of angry civilians! Also, he is probably still healing from his injuries and already got a moment in the last chapter.

Todoroki?

Who has to placed at a different place then the rest students because he's also probably on the bad side of mob.

Then who?

Who do you think would have been suitable for this speech moment?

Whose arc should it be?

Who was the one to notice the impact that, that “Look at Endeavour!” guy made?

Who was the one to rush desperately to help in the aftermath of war?

Who was the one to witness the impact of war?

But NO!!!

WE JUST GOTTA HATE ON URARAKA CAUSE SHE COMES BETWEEN OUR CRAZY FAN SHIPS AND HASN'T DONE ANYTHING CRAZY BADASS AND DOSEN'T DESERVE TO BE THE NO.1 HERO'S WAIFU!!

That's just basically the entire fandom lately when it comes to Uraraka and now it has totally convinced me that even after this speech, no matter what she does, people will always find a reason to hate her.

Like come on! Let her have her own moment of shine. To think people are so biased lately that if it was Bakugo giving that speech, all Baku Stans would be like "Oh look, God Explosion DYNAMIGHT giving speech! This is go good! MHA has changed forever bla bla bla..!!"

Then why does when it comes to appreciating women, all people do is rant on how badly and underwritten they are.

Like can we even just put ships aside for a second and take some time to appreciate that the Uraraka who was always flustered in the beginning and was never able to do much finally found a voice of her own and is now stepping up to protect her best friend who has been wronged by the society then why?

Uraraka then-

Uraraka now-

See the difference?

Why is she getting so much hate just for wanting to bring Deku home? Because she harbours feelings for him? Just because she is inspired by him to do good things?

That's why?

It's not like she goes out of her ways to follow him. She has a seperate life goal, different work studies, different motivations and finally an endgame villan too.

That makes her character revolve all around Deku when Deku himself fanboys All Might like crazy? When Bakugo's entire "If you keep on looking down on others" arc was solemnly based on him underestimating Deku or even Todoroki who was saved by Deku and vice versa? Deku is the MC so ofc he would have impact on other people. Then why does Ochako gets reduces to 'Just a love-interest' when she's clearly more then that.

This is called the society being harsh on woman. Yeah, she is clearly not the best written character in the series but she's also definitely far from worse.

At first I was a bit dissatisfied and disappointed with the pacing of this chapter but can we just appreciate Horikoshi for giving us such beautiful shots of her lately? The fandom is clearly full of bias and it will always find a reason to hate on Uraraka but honestly, Ochako will forever be one of my most favourite Hero from this show.

And nothing can change that.

[popculturebuffet]

Pirate Month Patreon: Our Flag Means Death: "Pilot" Review (Patreon Review for Emma Fici)

Yo ho all you happy people! Pirate Month continues.. somehow. With some. The last few weeks have been rough seas, but pirate month sails on. And ironically, into the waters of HBO Max

Yeah after my shockingly popular rant last week, seriously any of you following or coming in from that or just in general

It's great to have you. But yes we're back to the dumpster fire that was once one of the proudest and best streaming services around but is now a self canablizing nightmare that won't go away. I've went from hoping any adaptation went here to hoping many flee in terror and praying some still actually get made. You used to hear me constantly singling disney out for their idiocy

But this somehow tops most of what they've ever done. These shows MIGHT return or someone else might be able to save the company, but for now we're just stuck praying anything we care about dosen't get cannonballed into oblivion and left where it's avaliablity is tenious at best. So why am I reviewing something from the network at the worst possible moment? Simple.. this was planned before. Emma has a busy schedule, so she tends to pick her patreons late unless I ask early, and being a forgetful sort, I can tend to. She's GOOD at it, with her picks having had me review incest civil war laser tag, badly animated sci fi nonsense and this glory

So it was only pure Parker Luck that HBO Max decided to canablize their animation for profit the same week I was set to cover this. But I realized something important: With access uncertain, with HBO max striking randomly and insanely, and with no safe harbor... I have to get off my ass and watch stuff that may be destroyed as soon as the next season is out, and as we've seen with Summer Camp Island it can happen BEFORE too, instead of waiting. Sure this project having a high profile creator attached, being a very high profile queer work , and having a huge fanbase MIGHT be a enough.. but given Logic and tact haven't really entered into this current dumbfuckery, it's best to see the series and review an episode NOW rather than wait and loose it in a tax writeoff next year after season 2.

So several paragraphs and f-you's later, we arrive at our real destination: Our Flag Means Death. And this really has been one i've been meaning to check out for some time: It's produced by Taika Watiti, whose lately become one of my faviorite creators: He's director of the all time cinematic classics What We Do In The Shadows and JoJo rabbit and the fun as hell Thor films Ragnarok and Love and Thunder, and created the excellent What We Do In The Shadows tv show, which is also on the pile. Feel free to boo I know I am, i'm missing peak Matt Berry by being behind on it, as well as producing another show i've heard nothing but good things about, Reservation Dogs. The guy is a genius so while he isn't writer or director here, and his character Blackbeard isn't in this pilot, he clearly picks projects he puts his name on very carefully and if he's remotely involved with something, it's usually a good sign it's awesome. Add in Rhys Dharby who I first fell in love with on flight of the conchords as Murray...

And while he could've easily stopped with this cult classic I also need to watch (I mostly followe dit via music videos when it was airing and haven't watched it despite having easy access since max launched because i'm stupid and forget it's there), he has since made a sizeable name for him as a voice actor. Seriously while he mostly plays smaller parts he's popped up in TONS of shows since the late 2010's, from Milo Murphy's Law, RIP, to Rise of the TMNT , also RIP, to shows that aren't dead probably. He's played warthogs, snowflakes, gay hypo's, evil pistachios and more but really hasn't as far as I can tell been a leading man in anything. He was important to FOTC, but this seems like the first time the guy has REALLY been let loose and thus that was a huge draw for me.

And i'm happy to say that even before it hits it's peak and becomes a gay love story involving blackbeard, something I didn't know I needed and can't wait to hit as I watch more episodes, Our Flag Means death is an instant classic from the pirate and has finally given Rhys the meaty starring role he's always been capable of. The show is everything I hoped for.

While most of you reading this are likely fans of the show already, a quick refresher for those who aren't as familiar, i.e. Emma most likely: Our Flag Means Death follows Stede Bonnet, based on the real life pirate I know nothing about of the same name, a posh aristocrat who fled his old life to become a pirate, and is trying to clean up piracy a bit: He pays his men wether their succesful or not, and built his ship, the awesomely named The Revenge, with a sauna, rec area, and a personal library he'd be glad to lend out to the crew if any of them besides his assitant, the equally posh Lucius, played by Nathan Foad. Like a large chunk of the cast, i've never heard of him but like said chunk, he's excellent so it really dosen't matter. Steed does compensate by reading the pirates a story every night, as of the pilot Pinnochio. He's essentially trying to run this pirate ship like a modern work place, basically if Micheal Scott and Leslie Knope got combined in some horrible teleporter accident and became a pirate, having the bad need to be loved and have a family and be liked as the other, but like the latter having some compietence, optiism and good intentions, just being too naive to realize how hard ti's going to be to get these through.

Unlike other work coms though, the crew can actually kill their boss if he annoys them too much and the pilot centers around that, with the crew preparing a mutiny, with the only ones not being on board as much being Oluwande, played by Samson Kayo, a kind sort whose fond of the captain even if he's not the best and Jim, a seeming mute great with knives played by Vico Ortiz.. who turns out to be nonbinary. Which is good for me I got spoiled on that as it means I won't get any prounounds long. Though none of the crew is bad, it's just how change is: the rest simply can't accept that stede's way of doing things is PROBABLY better and he just needs to grow into the position, with Oluwande being the only one aware that not only is this much better.. but that it's so rare it' sbest to enjoy it while he lasts. Hey I said he appriacates the captain, I didn't say he was in denial about Stede's odds of survivial. Leading the mutiny is the lisping Black Pete (Matthew Maher) , a wannabe tough guy who claims to have been on blackbeards boat and won't shut up about it and the Jerry from Parks and Rec looking Kristian Nairin as Wee John, a giant who wants to burn things. Naturally I love him.

So to offset the mutiny after several small insignifigant raids, Stede targets the biggest/only ship they can see and with Buttons conformation the crew gets ready to have a bloody good time gettin good and bloody.. but Stede has a full on Panic Attack as we flash back to his past. And this is where the show really got me. See I throughly enjoyed it and was on board to this point, the jokes were that kind of goofy creative type of humor I enjoy from Stede telling everyone to "look scary' to the crew only not killing him at the moment because he's one of the only two people who can read, the only one who can do the voices and they want to know how Pinocchio ends, and Stede deciding the best way to help with disatsifaction at first is a flag design contest. It's truly my kind of show.

But what takes it from really good to great is making stede far more complex than he appears. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind a work just being a goofy comedy. That's fine by me and Producer Watiti did wonders with that with What We Do In The Shadows, which had moments of pathos but was mostly just the story of a bunch of goofy vampires in new zeland and their dark bidding on the interent.

So series creator and showrunner David Jenkins could've kept at that and i'd of been fine.. but he took it one step further without undercutting the wacky tone entirely, which can be tricky but he pulls off well. From here we start seeing pieces of Stede's old life.. and it was miserable. The first flashback here has a butcher working for the family slaughter an animal in front of the kid, tell him not to look away then mock him for being soft.

Which is thinly coded as people bullying him for coming off gay. Spoilers, Stede turns out to be VERY gay., but it's always a dickish thing to do to bully someone for being diffrent and to be a homophobic twitsandwitch.

But we see through later flashbacks in teh ep Stede never fit in: He was bullied at school, chased, called slurs and then had his hands tied to oars and forced to row and at home there was literal distance between him and his family... no seriously he sat at one end while his family sat at the other

Stede was an outsider in his own home, his own LIFE, never accepted by anyone it seemed (other episodes may prove this wrong) and even now trying to find a new family, he's not really accepted. While the metaphor there given Stede is also a gay man and a not tradtionally masculine man, is subtle a knife to the eye, it still works because it dosen't overshadow the story but plays into it. Stede is not conventional.. yet he's a good man and while he may not be a good pirate YET his ideas aren't bad and he has his heart in the right place. I mean until someone cuts it out and holds it up as a trophy but for now he's trying to do the right thing he's just out of his depth. BUt he had no real other options: He coudln't get a divorce, given the century, his family , both immedite and other clearly never got him.. leaving to be a pirate, to try ANYTHING else is better than dying on the inside. He also uses the money he came from well: He gives his men a good wage, a tidy ship, and plenty of supplies. Odds are it'll run out.. but he's trying to do something better and more rich people coudl take a note from this fictional gay pirate and try and be better instead of hoarding wealth or cutting people's lifes works from a platform for 2.50 and an expired free pizza cupon.

Turns out though the ship.. is a HEAVILY armed royal naval warship and our heroes only don't die horribly because the Captain, Nigel Badmitton, a gloriously pompus name, is one of Stede's old bullies and thus dosen't buy the rumors that Stede is a pirate and Stede is able to quickly hide the crew as fellow aristocrats and servants.

The meal though is .. uncomfortable. Not only are the pirates naturally not really happy in the roll of high society snobs, but Badmittons crew are a bunch of racist twits who are unplesant to be around, and Badmittion himself a snobby bully who fondly recalls that incident with the oars I mentioned while the rest of the crew slowly get that "Okay this guy is a dumbass but he's OUR dumbass. " Things naturally break down once Stede is forced to humor badmittion and after one joke too many and Badmittion LAUGHIGN at the idea he could be a pirate, Stede tries braining him with a move Oluwande taught him.. and accidently makes the guy fall on his saber and into his eye

While the rest of the crew has a nice bloody massacre of most of Badmittions men after one's a racist to Oluwande starting with jim throwing a knife through a hand. While we don't see it, by the time Stede gets back to them only two are left alive and he's panicking over the corpse, not ready to have really killed someone, and only accepting it because Oluwande helps him, knowing that admitting to killing the guy will help the crew respect Stede.. which it does. Stede cements he can be badass for more than just accidedental murders by giving the one person they send back the same punishment his now dead captain gave Stede, showing that while Stede is out of his element, has clear trauma and may not be happy killin, which is a fair choice.. he's still got what it takes and thus his crew decides he can live for now. Also Jim's not a man OOOOO ALREADY SPOILED IT, and we end on a really nice bit: it being clear no matter how bad it was stede misses his family and treis to convince himself he's got a new one.. and him reading the crew pinoccio. Never has Rhys Darby reading a bunch of grown men to sleep been so touching.

So yeah Our Flag Means Death, at least the pilot is fucking fantastic. I don't know why the creators previous show failed: this one has style, humor and suprising tragedy, and excells at what it's producer does well: taking a mildly goofy but cool genre and poking fun at it while taking it JUST seriously enough to ground it. Our Flag Means Death is everything I hoped for and more and I highlyr ecommend watching it before it possibly burns. These are uncertain times.. but with Rhys Darby as a gay pirate... they might have some good times hidden in them too.

[kaiparker-avengerssmut]

Their Doll 8

Let me in

B.Barnes x Reader, S.Rogers x Stark!Reader

series synopsis:  y/n Stark, all records of her non existent, and yet Hydra still find her. When she is kidnapped by a certain super-soldier and no one believes her, she finds herself searching for unexpected familiarity in her not-so-distant past.

Series Warnings: smut, violence, torture, swearing

Chapter Summary: y/n gets emotional

Warnings: swearing, feelings

A/n: The timeline in this has been altered, as there I things I wanted to include but I also wanted this fic to follow the storyline/timeline of Winter Soldier and Civil war.So for purposes of this fanfic, Peter Parker was discovered by Tony at a much younger age - when he was bitten - and has been an intern with him since, almost like a protégée.(For the purposes of this story Peter was bitten much younger too - more like when he was 9 or ten rather than 14/15)

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

Life at the tower was...tiring, to say the least. During my free time I often found myself in the gym, lobbing knives at a target and trying my hardest not to biting one in Steve's chest every time he would correct my technique. When I wasn't trying to murder the avenger in cold blood, I was usually dragged into things by the other: briefings and debriefing for missions I'd never go on, my dad's parties, group training sessions and study periods with Bruce in his labs to name a few.

But for now, I was huddled in my rooms - fresh out of a hot shower after a brutal two hour training session and four mile run with Natasha - curled up on my bed and attempting to catch up on a few of the films I'd missed. But the exhaustion and drowsiness clouded my eyes, the noise from the TV merely in the background as I felt my eyes growing heavier by the second.

A sharp knock at the door snapped my out of my lowsey state, the people movie across the screen simple a blur of colour as my eyes darted past the tv and over to the door.

"Mr Stark is waiting at your door. Would you like me to let him in?" FRIDAY's evenly calm voice chimed, making me groan and mumble a 'no' into my pillows. The last person I wanted to see right now was my dad.

"Come on kid, let me in." My dad called from the other side of the door, and I could practically hear him roll his eyes and shake his head when I stayed silent. When he spoke again, it wasn't directed at me. "FRIDAY, override command and open the door."

"Wait! That's hardly fair!" I whined like a five year old, groaning again when the door swung open and my dad stood on the other side, quite clearly just as exhausted as I was.

"Get used to it, kiddo. Life isn't fair." Tony chided, walking over to my bed. I tried to shuffle away slightly when I felt the bed dip, my dad perching on the edge as his eyes scanned over the room. "I see you haven't decorated yet." He commented casually, as if nothing had ever happened between us.

"Yeah, well, I thought It'd be a shame to spend so much time on something when you're probably waiting to kick me out anyway." I mumbled, refusing to look at him.

"What the hell is wrong with you, y/n? Ever since you got back you've been-"

"Acting different?" I cut in, and when Tony simply swallowed thickly I nodded. "Funny that, seeing as I was kidnapped and tortured for three years. Not to mention made to kill people for another year after that."

"Y/n I'm sorry..."

"But you're not! You can't be, otherwise you'd actually have tried to save me, rather than leaving me to rot!" My voice cracked, tears pricked at my eyes and I now sat up straight in my bed, facing my dad but not looking him in the eye. "And you can't change that, you can't go back in the past and fix your mistake. And trying to fix it now sure as hell won't work, so I suggest you leave before I'm tempted to use you as my target for my training session tomorrow." I raised my voice, eyes now keeping his captive as the tears rolled freely down my cheeks.

"Oh, kid, they broke you." Tony murmured, cupping my cheek with his hand, eyes swimming with sorrow. Sorrow that I didn't want.

"You can't fix me either, because I'm not broken!" I said harsher now, voice only getting louder. "I don't need to be fixed..." I trailed off, voice barely above a whisper Joe as my eyes broke the contact, averting to my lap as the tears dropped onto the bed sheets.

That's how I found myself in my fathers arms, face pressed against his shoulder as the sobs made my body shake, hiccups escaping me as I tried to speak.

"A-all I needed W-was my D-dad, and yo- you took him f-from me!" I wailed, hands clutching my dad's shirt and his arms wrapped protectively around my shoulder, hands rubbing circles over my back soothingly.

"I know, kiddo. I'm sorry."

...

"Who is that?" Clint frowned, staring at the pictures scattered over the table in front of Natasha and Steve as they studied them deeply,  brows creased in thought.

"Our newest pain in the ass." Tony answered for them, slapping a thick folder down in front of Clint as he said so. The marksman was quick to pick it up, flicking through the documents, news stories and information sheets greedily.

"The...winter soldier?" He asked, looking at the three superheroes in front of him as if they'd gone mad. "But he's a ghost story!"

"I've seen him. Been shot by him, actually." Nat said, an sadistically proud smirk forming on her lips with her last words, almost as if it were an achievement.

"We're trying to find out more about him, maybe that way we can beat him." Steve explained, sitting back in his chair with crossed arms as he huffed in defeat, sick to death with staring at the same five pictures all morning.

Y/n walked in, a skip in her step as she crossed the room to Tony.

"Morning, dad." She greeted, placing a quick kiss to his cheek and heading over to the cupboard to grab a mug. Clint and Natasha frowned in confusion, looking between the two as if they'd witnessed pigs fly.

Tony shrugged, y/n too preoccupied with making herself a coffee to notice the avengers' reactions. When her coffee was done, y/n swiped her mug from under the machine and sipped happily, letting out a content sigh before wandering over to stand behind Natasha.

"What are you working on?" She asked, peering over the spy's shoulder to get a glimpse of the pictures.

A loud smash crashed through the room, Tony's eyes widening in shock and Natasha jumping from her seat in order to not get covered in spilt coffee. Y/n stood paralysed, eyes never leaving the photo in front of her as she started at the Soldier. Steve frowned deeply, studying the girl as her eyes glossed over with with what seemed to be...sadness.

Clint was already at her side, a comforting hand on her shoulder as they all asked y/n what had happened and if she was alright. It was like a constant ringing in her ear interrupted their words before they reached her ears, and y/n suddenly felt nauseous as she starred at the bright red star on the soldier's arm, his long and messy dark hair shrouding his face and his leather clad, muscular body. Only his cerulean blue eyes could be seen, the rest of his face covered in a black mask she didn't usually see him in.

"I-I need some air." She stuttered, stumbling blindly out of the room and down the stairs, tipping over a few steps from the bottom and tumbling down the last few. She quickly pulled herself to her feet, hearing still ringing and vision offset, hazy, as she scrambled for the double glass doors. Luckily they already stood open, so she flew through them and out into the busy streets of New York.

Y/n found herself colliding will someone almost instantly, angry shouts of 'hey, watch it!' And 'look where the fuck you're going, kid!' Being called after her like a chorus as she pushed through the bustling people.

She finally stopped, dropping to her knees and simply staring straight ahead, no intended subject in her line of vision as she tried to comprehend the-the grief, at seeing the a soldier's face again.

It had only been two weeks, and yet two weeks without him, his touch, his scent - it felt like an eternity to y/n now. She hasn't registered what her feeling meant for him before, liking him beyond a source of comfort had just felt...wrong, after all he'd done, and yet y/n couldn't deny it.

She was in love with the Winter Soldier, and she didn't even know his name.

...

I wasn't aware of when someone had found me, nor of how they got me back to the tower or even how I was now stood staring blankly out of the window that stood next to my bed. I gazed longingly, almost as if I stared long enough, hard enough, he'd appear.

But of course he wouldn't, he was probably half way across the world, knowing HYDRA. A soft knock on my door and my head was turning, facing my visitor with a look of pure grief and want. Desperate, unhinged want that could eat you up from inside out and you'd still feel it.

"Hey, y/n. Can I talk to you for a moment?" Nat asked tentatively, clearing trying to to disturb my shaken up state. I nodded, offering a small smile which she returned as I now faced her. She walked up to me, talking my hands him hers and playing with the as she spoke, eyes kind and full of understanding.

"There's a mission, and we want you to go." She said calmly, almost as if the mere thought of it would send me into some kind of heart attack.

"Okay," I begun, eyes flitting down to the floor before back up again. "What is it? Aren't you scared that I'm still HYDRA and all I'd do is stab someone in the back?"

"Not exactly." Nat informed me with a smile, amusement glinting in her eyes at my assumption. "For starters, we all trust you, well maybe not steve - but everyone else does." Nat and I both laughed slightly. "And I think you wouldn't have it any other way it to go on the mission yourself." Nat finished.

"How come?" I asked, brow raised.

"There's been a lead..." she started. "On the winter soldier. We thought you might want to help check it out, possibly capture him. Your powers may be the best chance we have a detaining someone as strong as him." Nat spoke. "And if we can detain him.."

"We can save him." I finished.

"Exactly."

[aphrodite-would-be-proud]

overlordred said: Heyyyyyyyyyy Doll Face, it me again 🥸🤓, so I saw that you’ve had Porco on the brain and it made something in my brain click again. I don’t know what it is with my need for characters with devoted animal companions but it’s just my thing. Like Porco’s S/O has had her tortoise since she was a kid and it’s HUGE now and since I’m sure you’ve mentioned Udo loves turtles, in a last ditch effort to keep the kids occupied while babysitting them Porco’s like I have a turtle and the kids just lose their minds from this tortoise (who for some reason has a name like Speed or something 😆) If you don’t see it I very much respect that but I just thought I’d share lol. I hope you’re having a beautiful day and good fortune smiles on you. Laters!

Porco & you babysitting pt.2

{ Porco x reader | tw:none | fluff, light drama | modern }

{ "De Forest Interior" 1878 by Walter L. Palmer  1854-1932 }

"What's wrong?" He said with a frown, stepping back to give you space. "Did i do som-"

"No. It's just that…" you interrupted him, "Porco, what are we exactly? Is this a relationship or are we just friends wit-" 

Before you could finish, a high pitched scream came from where the kids were, snapping your attention to the closed door. Porco was the first to move, not wasting a second in pushing it open before hurrying to the living room, you followed behind.

The room was dark, with the tv blue screen illuminating it, whatever was on it was forcefully turned off. It was mostly quiet except for the shallow breathing you'd hear the closer you got to the couch.

Your eyes landed on a small figure, curled into a ball beside the couch, wasn't it for his glasses reflecting the tv light you wouldn't have spotted him.

Before Porco would trip and fall on his face, you flicked the light switch on, so he could avoid the pillows littering the floor.

Udo was looking sickeningly pale, glasses pushed to his head with his face buried in his arms while hugging himself.

Falco was kneeling to him, hands visibly shaking as he tried to soothe the other, growing more nervous as you approached them. "We… we were playing this game and then this-" he hiccuped between his stuttering as he tried to explain what happened.

Porco quickly carried Udo who clung to him like his life depended on it while Falco continued trying his best to form coherent sentences.

You went around the couch where the other two were. Gabi was hugging a pillow in a tight grip, eyes damp as if she's holding back tears while glaring at the floor to avoid meeting your eyes.

She only shook her head when you asked if she's okay.

Meanwhile, Zofia was just...sitting still, too still. Her stare blank and empty at the tv screen, keeping silent and barely acknowledging you when you approached her.

Part of you felt responsible for leaving the kids alone with a horror game when seeing their state now.

"Let's just move them to the kitchen, it'll be okay. Can you carry Zofia?" Porco said with Udo in his arm as Falco trailed after him while clutching his shirt.

You nodded before going to pick her up, she didn't resist but she seemed too stiff and uncomfortable. 

Falco actually came back to hold Gabi's hand and guide her with him after Porco, she took her pillow with her too.

When All of them were huddled in their chairs near the table, you could clearly see how visibly shaken they were.

You attempted to soothe them as Porco gave them some cookies and milk that they drowned quickly.

After time, reassurance and Porco lighting up the mood by making some snarky comments about the horror game they were playing that got them giggling, they slowly calmed down.

Falco was the first to feel better

Gabi soon enough followed. 

He was telling Porco about how he got the highest score in the game so far which made Gabi object and say she's the one who got the highest score, soon enough forgetting why she was scared in the first place.

They started another fight that basically was one saying "no you didn't!" and the other replying with "yes i did!!" over and over.

That actually managed to make Zofia laugh, more at them than with them. 

The only one left who hasn't spoken a word since the beginning was Udo.

Still holding onto Porco with shaky hands.

You and Porco watched as the three of them attempted to cheer him up, each with their unique way.

Gabi saying it's okay he shouldn't be scared because she will protect him and beat up the scary monster if it showed up.

No one dared to bring up the pillow on the table.

Falco said they can just go back and watch some Minecraft let's play instead.

It almost worked but the mention of going back to the living room made Udo even more scared.

Zofia suggested that they can play some animal crossing together and she'd even water all his flowers for him.

That made him perk up, only to frown again when he realised he forgot his switch at Reiner's place.

They kept listing off suggestions but nothing seemed to work or make him smile.

And the fact he still was actually scared and shaking made you and Porco more concerned by the second.

And then Falco said, "maybe we should...call his mom, she usually knows what to-" 

"Absolutely not" only to be interrupted by Zofia, "she'd never allow him another sleepover for at least a month."

You and Porco shared a look, as the adults in this situation it was your responsibility to make sure he's safe and call someone who knows what to do. 

Holding Udo closer to him with one arm while the other reached for his phone from his pocket, Porco scrolled through his saved contacts. "I think i have his mother's number saved somewhere...here it is, ms-"

In a quick motion, Zofia snatched his phone away. Surprisingly not only you but Falco and Gabi too with her strong reaction.

"No. You don't understand she won't allow him near us again." She explained in a firm tone, grip strong against the phone while looking at Porco in the eye. "Call Reiner instead."

Porco stiffened at the mention of the other's name, a sour look on his face. He was about to refuse but seeing at Zofia's pleading eyes made him stop at the last second.

He looked at you, you gave him a nod.

"Fine." He caved in, running a hand through his hair, "I won't call her, I promise.". 

Some seconds passed by as Zofia was eyeing him to determine if he's telling the truth, her grip only softening when her gaze fell on Udo who's still clutching the other's shirt. She reluctantly handed him the phone.

You watch the weirdly intense scene unfold, unsure if you should say something or not.

In the end, you decided not to interrupted. Although noticing how unusually quiet Gabi and Falco were, you realised that they weren't even in the room anymore.

Porco seemed too busy glaring at the air while murmuring something under his breath as the phone rang, while Zofia had her full attention on Udo.

Thankfully, you didn't have to say anything since Both Gabi and Falco came running back into the kuchen, huge smiles on their faces.

"Udo! Udo you won't believe this, there's this giant turtle in Porco’s room!" Falco yelled in excitement.

"It's this big!" Gabi stretched her arms as wide as she can, "and it's black all over with yellow dots! It looks so cool!"

That seemed to get Udo's attention, slowly turning his head from where he was burying it against Porco’s now ruined shirt.

"Really?" He whispered, eyes hopeful and colour returning to his face.

"You went inside my room?" Porco said, alert in his voice.

"What?" Came a voice from his phone, "why would you call me to ask that?...no i didn't. Are the kids okay? I can hear them yelling." Reiner said.

Apparently, that was what it took for Udo to finally calm down.

You watched as Gabi and Udo sat on the ground, faces pressed against the tank glass while attempting to coax the shy turtle out of hiding.

"Her name is lady dash, and if you step back and stop scaring her like that then i might let you feed her some meat." Porco said.

With that, both of them were under lady dash's love spell in no time. 

Gabi thought she was the coolest thing in the world, Udo agreed while counting the yellow dots on her shell.

Keeping true to his word, Porco let them give her some food.

They watched with anticipation as she emerged from the shallow water, slowly gliding towards the food.

They both held their breath as she extended her neck, opening her mouth as wide as she can before taking a big bite of the meat, slowly munching on the piece she cut off.

As soon as it ended, they turned around begging Porco for more food to give her.

Zofia and Falco joined too complaining that it isn’t fair since they didn't have a turn.

Porco looked at you for support, you just smiled before saying how come you don't get a turn too?

In the end he gave you all strawberries to give her to munch on.

After that roller coster of emotions, it came no surprise that the kids started getting sleepy and yawning, having used all their sugar energy from ice cream in the previous freak out.

If there's something you know, is that you should never tell a kid that needs a nap, that they need a nap.

Never ever.

Apparently Porco didn't know that.

And now you have four sleepy kids being defensive and offended that you'd even suggest that.

Thankfully tho, they seemed too tired to agru too much as they decided to finally sleep.

Gabi said she isn't even tried, she's only joining because Falco wouldn't stop whining.

Udo and Zofia agreed, despite the three of them being minutes from dozing off.

Falco ended up being their excuse for a nap, but he didn't complain...too much.

Realising that there's still two hours remaining before Reiner comes to pick them up, Porco seemed too eager to get them to sleep to get some time alone with you.

Hell he even grabbed the blankets and pillows and made them makeshift beds in the living room himself just so him and you can go back to his room alone.

"What…no we're not sleeping there." Said Gabi, standing in the middle of the doorway to the living room, arms crossed as the other three stood behind her.

"Yeah...it's still scary." Added Udo, stepping closer to Zofia. 

"Can we just sleep in your bed instead? Please?" Falco too was hiding behind Gabi, eyes avoiding the tv at any cost.

Porco gave a stern look, lifting an eyebrow as he too crossed his arms. "No. You're big kids you can handle it." 

"If you say so" Zofia poked her head from behind Gabi, "although, it'd be a shame if these pictures of Udo crying, Gabi drinking energy drinks and Falco eating a hot pepper pizza reached Reiner huh." 

And in that moment, you remembered exactly the fimilar sense of unease you felt about these kids some hours ago. 

You looked at Porco’s unbelieving eyes, knowing fully well he must accept this defeat gracefully. 

[toujoursmiraculous]

Thoughts and Reaction to Gang of Secrets!

I'm very late today at writing this because life ;-; You know it's a bigger episode when they start off with a problem. Ladybug doesn't want to detransform so she's desperate to find reasons to remain Ladybug. I love how the entire time, Chat Noir knows something's wrong and wants to get her to talk about what it is, but she just tries to pretend she's fine. If anything, Chat Noir would probably be the best person to talk to considering everything he's dealt with too both with Kagami and his responsibility as Chat! She could mention that she was seeing someone but they broke up because of her secret, and she could tell him how much being the Guardian's having an affect on her. All perfectly well and good without exposing any identities or things like that with questions for details asked. Instead she puts up a front with him and pretends she's okay in front of him and it's just so sad. :/ I understand why she doesn't, probably because she doesn't want him to know how much she's struggling. But ugh my heart hurts for her. Chat: I know where we can go where we won't have to talk! Ladybug: Yes, take me there Chat! *in the theater* Ladybug: You lead me into a trap. I MEAN HE'S NOT WRONG THOUGH! Not many places you can go where it's okay or encouraged to not talk without there being an awkward silence. But that cracked me UP. Also that casual attempt to wrap his arm around her lolol still hasn't give up, I see. I also find it simultaneously hilarious and extremely depressing that Ladybug's ranting like that in the theater because of a romance movie. When your heart is broken, that's probably the last thing you want to be doing. And Chat Noir yanking her down asking that she be quiet 😂 Literally just rants her entire love life out for everyone including Chat to hear in that theater. CHAT NOIR, YOU BETTER BE LISTENING BECAUSE SHE'S TALKING ABOUT ADRIEN HERE "She takes a long time to tell him and stutters and blah blah blah" lol sound familiar, sunshine? If anything please have him recall this later and be like, wait, didn't Ladybug say girls stutter around a guy when she likes him? BAM. Then he's off on his path towards Marinette. I can dream. Ladybug: And how do you know if he loves her? IMPOSSIBLE. Adrien: No, Marinette couldn't possibly be in love with me. *eyetwitch* But at the end of the day. This is Marinette ranting to Adrien about how she had to give up on Adrien and then couldn't make things work with Luka because of her secret. Ooof. And poor Chat having to apologize for everyone because Ladybug's disturbing them XDD THE GIRL SAVES EVERYBODY'S LIVES PRACTICALLY EVERY DAY AND THEY'RE PISSED SHE'S RUINING A MOVIE THEY CAN JUST REWATCH? 😂 She's clearly having a hard time right now, c'mon people! Chat can tell she has a broken heart. This boy is so sweet. He wants her to at least admit that and talk about it so she can feel better but you know, Ladybug's stubborn. I WANT TO GO SWIMMING LET'S GO SWIMMING CHAT, WOO HOOOOOO! Ladybug acting like Chat to hide her pain just like how Chat acts like Chat to hide his pain. YOU KNOW WHAT, IT'S FINE. :') It doesn't matter how much pain she's dealing with, those pictures mean too much to her to remove them. x3 Thanks Juleka for showing us how sad Luka is now, that's very helpful. Marinette's been going into the bathroom at school to cry, and then had planned stupid looking glasses to hide her tears so people wouldn't have to know she's cried because wearing a ridiculous pair of glasses that's embarrassing is better than being asked what's wrong. Because the pain I feel for her wasn't already enough. Ugh I adore Trixx. Trixx being the voice of reason when Tikki's not there, trying to help and letting her know that Tikki may need to rest too when she's so upset it doesn't cross her mind. And the tears in her eyes when she apologizes to Tikki for not thinking of her like she should. ;-; SO MUCH PAIN. OH DANG Alya was literally a second away from seeing a detransforming Marinette lol But she did say DETRANSFORMATION or well in the English dub it'll be "Spots

off" I love Rose, she's really sweet. and considerate But she also shouldn't be touching things in others rooms like that. I never liked it when my friends went around my room touching stuff. Also didn't help that a couple of them stole from me... but it's just not a cool thing to do. Would've probably ended up much better had she not had to desperately hide an exposed Miracle Box. But then we wouldn't have had what happens so it's all good c: Marinette saying she doesn't want to be friends with the girls anymore

It hit Alya deep. Everyone else is like *le gasp* but her eyes all shrunken like that, you can tell it really got to her hard.

This entire exchange right here. Alya's glance at her in the first picture is piercing, like I can feel that OOF feeling in my chest when I see it. The new music dramatizes it so well that a lot of people probably didn't pay attention to it the first time around. Can we just appreciate how these animators got all these emotions so right and did such a good job animating everything for us? And those that work on the music too? Everything's so spot on. Marinette's red-rimmed eyes is so well done. "No, it can't end like this!" Awww Alix getting super upset too x3 I honestly think Alix could be the next one.... you know what I mean BUT I'll wait until the end to talk about it. Trixx pulling a Plagg and rescuing Marinette! x3 I seriously love Trixx, I really do. I know the other Kwami's got mad, but if he hadn't done that it would've been disaster, probably. And the episode wouldn't have ended how it did! And Plagg knowing it was Trixx who caused the Eiffel Tower to be all weird xD Why do I get the feeling the relationship between Trixx and Plagg would be like that of Chat Noir and Rena Rouge? And I want to point out, we got 7 whole seconds of Adrien again! Aren't we lucky? The last time we got so little of Adrien in an episode was when we had his parallel episode Lies. I don't think that'll happen this time but I do hope it means more Adrien later on. Ladybug: They're after Marinette Dupain-Cheng. Chat Noir: Okay but remember everybody likes her (so don't go thinking she's a bad person for causing their akumatizations) Yes, I read between the lines. Ladybug being able to get through to Lady Wifi and have her deakumatize herself was absolutely amazing! I know Chloe was the first to fight off being akumatized but once you're akumatized it's obviously extremely hard to break. That says a lot about Alya. "Because you're an incredible friend, Ladybug." One, AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW Two, did you notice the little jerk of her head, gesturing to Ladybug like that when she said it?? It's the little details guys that make this so good. 😍 "Chat Noir, nooooo!" Guys, we got our tiny little Marichat scene! It's not actually real, but still! (okay but why do I also get this really weird feeling like something like this may end up being real later?) Alya giving Ladybug that hug 😭 Marinette has such good, supportive friends. I love them all. x.x YES THANK YOU. Alya's finally realizing there are more things going on with her than just boys. One of the things that's always irked me since Chameleon is that any issue Marinette has, be it with Lila or otherwise, she always assumes it has to do with Adrien. Of course, at the time she didn't know she was Ladybug but she should've still listened and realized there's something else up. But now she finally is noticing and I love how she was going to respect her regardless and not push. Pushing has always been one of Alya's characteristics, but she knew whatever it was was something too big and serious to push her on. "Marinette, I'm your best friend, and I always will be." 😭😭😭 This episode brought me so close to tears so many times. Marinette admitting she's keeping secrets, lying to everyone. Admitting that that's why she draws a line between her and Adrien, and why her and Luka didn't work out. Alya saying however heavy it is, they'll carry it together (MY HEART) And then Marinette saying "If I tell you, things between us will never be the same. It's going to destroy everything, change it all." It sounds like this girl is thinking about Chat Blanc and oop there's the sound of my heart breaking again. So much paaaain. "Je suis Ladybug." YESSSSSSS Why they had to leave it off on a cliffhanger But YESSSSSSS First, the expressions she had flash on her face, the gasp 😮, then the expression like she's trying to get her mind to process. Then if you notice, Marinette gives a little nod, as if letting her know that it's true. Then the way her eyebrows furrow and pulls her into the hug as she understands all that she has on her shoulders as that music plays. I'm getting

emotional just writing this. 😭 This episode is just so amazingly good in so many ways, I don't think I can actually cover it all. I'm very impressed. I've loved nearly every episode this show has put out, even those that a lot of people seem to hate. But this one, I don't see how this could actually be hated if you're trying to think of everything that happened from Marinette's point of view, her thoughts, feelings, struggles, depression. I will say, personally I hoped Chat Noir would learn who Ladybug is first. He's been such a good partner, very thoughtful, always putting his life on the line. He's also been dealing with a lot of the same struggles. I felt like he deserved to know first. However, this isn't about who deserves what, it's about what Marinette needs. It's not that she doesn't want to tell him who she is! Don't misunderstand. There are many times throughout the past 3 seasons where she wants to or regrets not being able to. But now, Chat Blanc's in her mind. She knows what could happen if she tells him with Hawk Moth still there, so she can't do it. So instead, she tries to pretend in front of him that she's fine even though talking to him about everything would help and fix so much. In her mind, that's not an option. I just hope that when he finds out she told someone else first, he doesn't think that she doesn't trust him enough to tell him. Next I thought maybe Alix. That way it'd be more understandable to Chat that she'd know, after all future Bunnyx clearly knows and said to Ladybug that she chose her because she's capable of keeping secrets (notice how Alya said that to Ladybug in the alley? I bet Alix will find out in the near future. Maybe not this season, but she'll find out.) But that's for another time. But now Alya knows! Her best friend, the one to have her back and will no doubt have it even more so now! Watch out, Lila. Alya doesn't hold back so I can imagine how vicious she could be to her (and I can't wait). And that brings up a very interesting thought. Alya will realize Adrien has been the only one to have her back in Lila situations. Why would he do that, hmm? When everyone else was so sure Lila's an angel and Marinette must be bad for saying anything negative about her. Journalist Alya, incoming! There's also the matters of Alya bringing up Marinette's feelings for Chat Noir because duh, everybody can see how much she loves him! There are even photos of them kissing, one of which happened in front of Alya's own eyes! Though affected by an akuma, they all know that kiss didn't happen because of it. And of course, Alya has brought up twice in the show so far that Adrien and Chat Noir could be the same person. And last time Alya said that neither of them could be Ladybug and Chat Noir. Except, she's now found out that Marinette is Ladybug. So maybe Adrien could after all be Chat Noir. I look forward to seeing how their new dynamic is. I wonder how this affects their relationship with the other girls. And I'm most curious about how Nino and Adrien may react to this change. I thought during Truth and Lies both that their best friends were going to find out about their breakups. Gang of Secrets was Alya finding out. Even though I feel like another parallel episode is just wishful thinking, I can't help but think it may be a possibility. Nino and the boys are going to wonder what's up with Adrien too. They're going to wonder why he's not with Kagami anymore so suddenly. So what if i the end, Chat Noir ends up telling Nino? I could see it, if this takes place shortly after Gang of Secrets, where she tells Chat that she's confided her identity in a very close friend and somehow they agree that he can tell someone too that he trusts to make it fair. It'd be an amazing way to exercise Ladybug's trust in Chat Noir too. Then we'd have both Alya and Nino in on it, keeping their best friend's secrets for them without knowing about the other one. Oh that'd be so beautiful! And also let them keep their Miraculouses too after the charms are given to them and Alya has the ability to break

free after being akumatized. I adore Rena and Carapace so much I'd be ecstatic if they kept them. 😭 Anyway, so much potential can come out of this episode and I honestly cannot wait until episode 4!!

[s1rcus]

The Road to Love and Truth (Blackhill)

Rating: Teen and up

Words: 2827

Chapter: 2/2

Fandoms: Marvel

Characters: Natasha Romanoff, Maria Hill, Steve Rogers, Nick Fury

Additional tags: -

Summary: Maria struggles after her night with Natasha. She gets some good advice from Steve.

Authors note: Blackhill Bingo square I3 "Steve Rogers"

Story below the cut or in AO3 here

Maria still has a huge headache. She's been debating taking another aspirin to ease it down for the past 10 minutes, but it hasn't been too long since she took the first one and it might just not be working yet. The situation with Romanoff might not be helping either.

Without thinking she's making her way towards Phil's office. She's not sure why, she knows she won't talk about something like this to him. He's a good friend but she just can't talk about her sex life with him, less about feelings. Maybe he'll have some work she can do to distract her from the night before. She can't use her key card on a day off, (Fury has made it very clear she's not supposed to be doing work during any type of leave) so she can't go to her own office to continue work.

Phil isn't in his office. Now that she actually thinks about it, he has been on a mission since yesterday. She still needs something to distract her though. Maybe Fury would let it slide this once if she'd go do work, but she'd rather not see him right now. She decides to just go for a walk. Hopefully that'll clear her head a little.

------

The fresh air does help her headache and clears her head just the tiniest bit as well. She stands outside of the Triskelion for a short time and decides to go for a short walk along the river.

She keeps her eyes mostly on the water as she walks hands in the pockets of her sweats. She probably should've changed if she's honest, but she didn't want to go back to her room. SHIELD agents weren't that rare sight around these parts, but they definitely didn't go out in their gym clothes. She kicks around some pebbles every once in a while that are lying around the sidewalk.

She loses track of time, trying to just focus on nothing but the movement of the water. And she might have let her guard down, because she gets startled, when a hand taps her on the shoulder.

"Maria, what are you doing out here?"

"Jesus, Steve. Warn a girl next time."

"I literally yelled your name when I saw you. You're not usually this distracted. Are you okay?"

There's concern on his face and Maria doesn't like it one bit. She's fine, and even if she wasn't, everyone else needs to think she is.

"Everything's fine," she lies.

Steve gives her a long look, not quite believing her.

"You can always talk to me, you know? Whatever it is that's bothering you, I'll listen."

Damn Steve, and his kind heart.

"I know," she says.

"Okay, well I'm gonna finish my run. Come and find me if you want to talk about whatever this is," he says as he runs past her.

Maria just waves him off. She continues along the river for a while longer until her headache becomes worse again. Deciding it's best to just go back and take another aspirin, she turns around and heads towards the Triskelion again.

------

Eventually Maria realises she needs to talk to someone so she heads towards Steve's quarters and knocks on his door. He opens the door with a smile. They're good friends but it's quite rare she actually ends up on his doorstep.

"Hey, Maria. What's up?"

"I slept with Natasha," she answers as she pushes past him into his room. She sits on his bed, head in her hands. She hears the door click shut as Steve closes it.

"Not what I was expecting. How are you feeling?"

Maria groans at the question, "I don't know. I find out she's queer and few days later I find her in my bed. That's not how that should go. And worst of all I want to do it again, but I don't think I can just keep it at that."

"So you want to ask her out?"

"I think so?" She says and lays down on the bed so she can stare at the ceiling. "But I'm her superior, it's unprofessional, not to mention way too complicated. How am I supposed to be able to send her out there, if I'm worried if she'll make it back? How is Fury supposed to trust in me, if I get compromised because of her? Or what if I make the wrong decision, because I can't--" Steve cuts her off. She feels the bed dip, as he sits next to her on the bed and places a hand on her knee.

"Maria, you're forgetting one important thing, she's the Black Widow, she knows how to handle herself. Do you know how many times she's saved me out there? Because I've lost count by now. And Fury won't see you any differently if you start showing normal people emotions. Also stop worrying about 'what if's. Those are situations you can't know the answers for before it's too late. And for the record, I think you're already compromised. You care more about her than you know. Have for a long time."

"Fuck", Maria breaths the word out.

"Language."

"No, I actually fucked up."

"What did you do?"

"I just left her. She wanted to talk, and I just left her. I wasn't thinking clearly. I told her it was a mistake. Well it technically was because that was definitely not how I wanted that to go, but… I let her believe I don't want her. Shit!" She gets up quickly and starts pacing around. "I gotta go find her. Tell her that I'm sorry for how I treated her. That last night was great. Not that I really remember anything. To hopefully ask her properly out." She freezes on her tracks and turns to face Steve. "What if she says no? How am I supposed to continue working with her then?"

"Maria", Steve warns her.

"Right, won't know the answers before it's too late." She takes a deep breath. "Okay, I'm gonna go to find her. I wonder where she could be."

"At the gym with Barton."

"How would you know that?"

"Just a hunch."

------

She does find Natasha at the gym. She's beating up Barton at the mats. Maria decides to just stay by the door and watch, she'll notice her eventually. Natasha seems more tense than normal, maybe even a little angry. She doesn't move around as smoothly as she usually does. Her movements are a little more jacked, more forced. Maria realises that she's not fighting with a clear head. She's trying to push her feelings out. Maria was the reason the Widow's usually flawlessly smooth fighting style looked harsh and broken. It makes her heart twinge.

Eventually Natasha pins Barton down and he taps out. She gets up and her gaze shifts to Maria's. Maria physically flinches under her gaze. She quickly straightens her back and neutralises her face, when Barton gets back onto his feet and notices her presence.

"Commander," he coughs, eyes moving from Maria to Natasha and back again. After a couple of beats of silence he starts backing towards the men's locker room. "I'll just go then."

Maria just looks at Natasha, not really sure what she's supposed to say. Before she's able to say anything, Natasha turns on her heels and heads towards the women's locker rooms. That gets Maria on the move as well. She runs after Natasha and grabs her from the upper arm.

"Natasha wait," Maria says and Natasha stops on her tracks. "I'm sorry about earlier. Can we talk?"

Natasha turns around and Maria tries to look as apologetic as she can. Natasha just stares at her for a while.

"Fine. My quarters in 10."

Maria nods and drops her hold of the other woman. She didn't even realise she had still been holding her upper arm. Natasha eyes her quickly once more before she turns around again and heads out of sight to the locker room. Maria just stands still for a while, looking after her, until she spins around as well and heads out of the gym and towards Natasha's quarters.

------

Natasha is punctual as ever, and appears exactly 10 minutes later. Maria follows her silently into her room. Natasha sits down on her bed, one leg under herself while the other hangs off the edge. Maria is reminded of the morning. She stays standing near the door, but is faced towards Natasha. She's trying to figure out her words, even though she's been trying to figure out what to say ever since she walked out of Steve's quarters.

"Well?" Natasha prompts her.

"I fucked up. I'm really sorry for how I treated you. I panicked and I fucked up. I try my best to keep my private life and work separate, and I mostly live at work so… I'm having a hard time, to put it lightly. I also have never done this before."

"What? Been with a woman?" Natasha asks with a serious tone. It takes Maria a beat to realise she's not actually seriously asking that.

"No, Romanoff. You know that's not what I meant. I mean sleeping with a co-worker. Actually kinda never slept with anyone without being on a date first. And especially never had someone in my bed in a SHIELD facility."

"So I was your first one night stand?"

"About that, I wouldn't mind doing it again."

"Was I that good?" Natasha asks with a smirk.

"Natasha! I'm not talking about the sex. I'm talking about all of it. Everything since the mission. Spending time together at that bar and during the mission and also everything that came after."

"Wow. Is Commander Hill getting soft?"

"No,” she says. Taking a breath she continues, “I'd just like to see if this could become something. You're one of the few people around here who I can stand, and I actually had a really nice time yesterday. And I'm not regretting what happened after, so that probably says a lot."

Natasha gives her a small smile.

"What changed?"

"What do you mean?"

"You left the room in such a hurry and now you're here saying you don't regret it."

"Yeah, that. I might've talked to Steve and he had some good advice."

"You went to Steve?" Natasha's voice sounds almost scandalous.

"Who else would I go to? Fury? Do you think I have many friends around here? People who I could talk to?"

"Fair enough."

"So, if I'd ask you out on a date what would you say?"

"I would love to, but do you really want to go on a date? Because I feel like we're not the dating kind of people."

That was actually fair, she did always hate going on dates.

"What do you suggest then?"

"How about this?" Maria is really unsure about how she should feel about the smirk that follows that one simple question.

Natasha gets up and walks towards Maria. She stops when their chests are basically touching. She grabs Maria's hands and wraps them around her waist. Then she wraps her own arms around Maria's neck and rises up on her toes to kiss her. Maria basically melts into it. Eventually she lifts Natasha up and they move on the bed. Natasha seems very impressed that Maria can lift her. Maria might be a bit hurt about that.

------

When they decide to leave for an early lunch (neither remembered to eat breakfast), they're barely 100 feet down the hallway from Natasha's room, when they're stopped by a junior agent.

"Commander, Agent Romanoff. Director Fury wants to speak to both of you."

Maria and Natasha exchange a look.

"Did he say what about?" Maria asks.

"Not really," the Agent answers but there's a look on his face Maria doesn't like. It's like he knows something he shouldn't.

Maria debates for a little bit, if she should push and get some answers from him but decides against it. She dismisses the agent and starts heading towards the Directors office with Natasha.

They get a couple weird looks and smiles on the way there. They walk the whole way in silence. Both clearly trying to figure out what Fury wants from them.

Fury sees them immediately, which tells Maria that it's something important. She's getting nervous. Natasha is here as well, so her mind goes only to a specific direction, but how would Fury know?

"Director Fury, you wanted to see us?" Maria greets him.

"Hill, Romanoff. Has either of you checked the news today or any social media?"

Natasha shakes her head. She's been awfully quiet after they ran into that agent.

"No, sir. I haven't checked my phone at all today. Pretty sure it's dead anyway. I've been a bit distracted," Maria answers truthfully. There's no point in lying.

"Well, you probably should stay out of social media for a little while but that's just a suggestion. Do you have anything else to report to me?" His eye shifts from Maria to Natasha and back.

He knows. Maria takes a deep breath. She feels Natasha's hand touch hers, a sign that it's okay.

"Yes, sir. We, uh... Natasha and I are involved."

"Will it be affecting your work?"

"No, sir."

"Then I'm happy for you," he says with the slightest hint of a smile.

Maria is surprised and she can sense that so is Natasha. She lets her posture get a little more relaxed.

"Now to the real reason I invited you in," Fury says as he pulls some tabloid articles up on the screen behind himself. They're all saying basically the same thing: Black Widow at a gay bar with a mystery woman . Some of them have clearly done a better job with trying to figure out who this "mystery woman" is because a couple of them have actual pictures of Maria along with her name. And there's pictures. Pictures of them kissing, the intense looks they changed during that night and pictures of them leaving together.

"We tried to get them down before they spread too far, but clearly we didn't manage that. Anything about the Avengers' personal life spreads like a fire. I'm sorry about the situation it puts you in."

Both of the women just nod. There wasn't anything to say. Fury takes this as his answer and turns off the screen.

"Well then, you're dismissed. Hill, if you could stay for just a little longer?"

Natasha squeezes her shoulder a little before she steps out of the room.

"Sir?"

"No reason to be that formal anymore. This is just me checking on you. How are you feeling?"

"Well, that's a lot, but I think I'm fine. It's not the way I wanted things to go, but I guess it's good that it's out. If we wish to go out, now we don't need to worry if someone sees us or not."

"Okay, still I wish the situation wasn't this. I strongly suggest that you don't check any social media for the next few days. I know you think you can handle it, but there's gonna be some bad stuff there and I'd prefer the dust settles a bit first. Also if anyone, and I mean anyone, in SHIELD gives either of you a hard time because of this, let me know. I will handle it. It's out there, so everyone knows. I wish you could've handled this on your own terms, but the situation is what it is."

Maria smiles at him.

"Thank you, Director. I know I said it won't affect my work, and I truly believe and hope so, but if it ever seems like I'm putting her before the mission; pull me out of it, if possible. I know I won't be happy about it, but I need to know that I won't be making mistakes because I'm compromised."

"Of course. But I have full belief that you'll do great even then."

Maria nods and heads towards the door but Fury's voice makes her turn around before she gets to open it.

"Also, before you go. I am truly happy for you, Maria."

Maria smiles at him and nods her thanks and joins Natasha on the other side of the door.

Natasha hugs her as she closes the door. Maria circles her arms around her and presses her cheek against Natasha's head.

"That went better than I expected." She hears Natasha mumble against her chest.

"It did," Maria agrees.

"I'm so sorry about the articles though. If I would've just realised--" Maria quiets her with a kiss.

"Natasha, there's nothing you could've done about it. The second we walked in there everyone was paying extra attention to us. Those articles would be there even if we hadn't kissed. I'm just glad we did. I don't think I would've ever dared to take this step otherwise," Maria says. She looks Natasha in the eye and they exchange smiles. "Now, how about that lunch?"