#Or Worse: disappointing their bfs mom

[smartwatermagic]

Hecate drops by at the most random hours semi regularly without a warning to visit Al. Percy and Annabeth are yet to get used to it no matter how many times it has happened.

[sweetimpurity]

Sometimes I have ideas for fics but not enough will-power to write the whole thing out all the way. This is one condensed haha ⬇️

not proofread 🥴 Part 2!!!

Earth-928

You're out to dinner with your bf Miguel. It's been such a nice night and you've been together so long. You think tonight is the night. He's gonna propose. His job as Spiderman does take him away from you a lot of the time. You tend to spend a lot of time missing him. Wishing he'd make more time for you. Make you his priority. That's the only doubt you'd have when it comes to spending your life with the man but other than that, you know you want it.

He took you for a walk on the beach, then to your favorite restaurant to end the night. You've just ordered your food when his comm watch get's a notification. A red alert emergency. Green Goblin in downtown Manhattan tearing up half a city block and blowing things up. Scaring civilians, injuring many.

"Babe... I'm so sorry... I think I have to go." He says, a growing sense of dread washing over him. And then he looks up to see that look of disappointment in your eyes. The heartbreak.

"You... are you sure, really?" Your voice breaks his heart. He sighs, looking down at the alerts coming in from Lyla. One after the other.

"I'm so sorry... I promise I'll be back as soon as I can..." He says, getting up from the table and kneeling in front of you, taking your hands into his. It breaks your heart even more watching him do that. Seeing him kneel. Except he's not proposing, he's leaving.

"You'll be my number one babe... when I get back I promise..." He says. But the words just make you feel so empty. "I promise... I love you. Wait up for me." He says, letting your hands go and stepping back. Sending an alert to Lyla that he's on the case and he's coming. "I love you babe..." He says again, stepping back and watching you. Wanting to hear you say it back. But you don't. You just watch him go. Heartbroken. Feeling so small, so unimportant. Unwanted.

He eventually has to just let it go and turn to leave. Passing by some people in the restaurant and leaving the restaurant. Trying his best to just keep going. To get this done and then he can be with you. But this has become a pattern as of late.

He gets outside the restaurant, getting to an alleyway and scaling the building, climbing to the top and pressing on the pod to make his suit expand and cover his body. Nanotech glowing up to his jawline and eventually closing over his face in fire red and dark blue.

He swings off to tend to the issue. To stop whatever's going on. Save the city. Again.

You wait for him for an hour. Sitting there like an idiot. Like a fool. Before deciding you deserve better than this. You ask the waiter to pack up the food and pay the bill. Three years you've been with this man. And this sort of thing just happens?

You grab your stuff, getting up to leave. Figuring you'll just go home and eat that ice cream in the freezer. Maybe call your mom or your best friend and get some reassurance or cry. Passing by people leaving the restaurant, you leave the building, walking down the sidewalk a few yards before-

"Baby!" He calls. The familiar sounds of a portal opening accompanying his voice. You look over and there's Miguel walking up to you from the alleyway next to the restaurant. Oh. You think. Here he is? "Hey-"

"You have to come with me. Right now baby. The anomaly, it's worse than we thought. We have to go, this dimension is gonna go!" He explains frantically, his voice slightly muffled by the mask you recognize so well on his face. He comes over, instantly taking both of your hands in his. The cool feeling of his suit on your warm skin. Really? You have to leave now? He said this sort of thing could happen at some point. But the chance was rare because he's always do everything he could before letting the dimension collapse. He's been gone for an hour and now the dimension is suddenly collapsing?

But if he says so, then you'd trust him. "Come on baby. We'll be safe you just have to come with me." He starts walking backwards towards the portal, holding onto your hands. It's not your first time going through a portal with him. It's a weird sort of tingly feeling.

"Okay okay" You nod, shocked by this sudden turn of events; walking with him and looking back on the world you know. The dimension you've lived in all your life. The place you've both shared a life in too. But if he'll be with you then everything should be fine.

He leads you through the portal, his big hand on the small of your back as he helps you through to the other side. The portal closing with a flash of glitching light. The alleyway falls silent. Not a sound.

An hour passes. The restaurant closes, everyone goes home. Your boyfriend swings back to the restaurant. Feeling like such a dick for leaving you like that. Leaving you when he too knew that this was supposed to be a special night. He gets to the restaurant. Finding it closed. "Damn it." He sighs. Pacing back and forth. "Lyla, is y/n back at the apartment?" He says. Walking down the sidewalk a bit.

"I can't track her phone right now. She either lost signal or turned the tracker off herself." She says.

"Damn it." He huffs again. Sighing and staring out at the street. His brow furrowing at what's before him. It's the car. His car. The one you both took to the restaurant tonight. Why is it still here if you're not?

"Lyla. What was her last recorded location?" He asks, staring at the car parked on the street. His mind flooded with possibilities. "Right here. Literally right where you're standing." She says, looking over the data.

He looks around. This doesn't make sense. "Track her again." He says.

"I can't-"

"Try again! Try something else! Street cameras! Surveillance footage! Something!" He yells in frustration and anger. Scowling and look around. Lyla sighs, pulling up the footage from the cameras on this street after hacking into their systems. Scrubbing through the footage.

"Let me see." He demands, looking at the holographic screen as Lyla displays it. There you are, leaving the restaurant. He winces, watching you leaving the place in defeat. Knowing this is his fault. But then he watches you stop, looking down the alleyway next to the restaurant. A flash of glitching light and then it looks like you're talking to someone.

You're definitely talking to someone. He check the time on the footage. It was about an hour ago. An hour ago you started talking to someone in the alley and then-

"What is she doing?" He mumbles, eyes widening when he sees you join hands with someone. The person that's taking up all your attention. "Zoom in Lyla." He demands.

The footage isn't super clear, it never is on these cheap street cameras. But he can see it. When the figure turns around, leading you down the alleyway. It's him. Himself? He can see the red and blue marking of his own suit. He's watching a video of himself leading you down an alleyway into what he can only assume is a portal. A portal to lord knows where. With a version of himself that's pretending to be the one you know.

[filthyloveforemesis]

Hehehe, sorry for consecutive posts but this is my journal now... Saw a post where someone had a lucky experience of witnessing a sickie and some lovely memories surfaced, although I wasn't as lucky to be a witness 😭😭

Back in school, when I was finally brave enough to search "people vomiting" in YouTube and desensitise myself (I was into emeto as far as I remember and I actually vividly recall a day when my curious 6 y/o naive brain decided to ask my mom about vomit and stuffs which my poor mom took it as a sign of me being sick but trying to brace through 😭💗)

Hard to believe how nauseous yet aroused I'd feel from the graphic videos and when my mind was clear enough, couldn't eat food for a good while but that's irrelevant.

But yea, my lights only lit up recently, I was pretty dumb and ran my mouth a lot and surprisingly, I had a pushover for a best friend (bonus ! She has a weak stomach). It probably started around grade 5 or 6 when I'd just randomly say "hey, ain't it kinda interesting and fun and exciting (couldn't tell I was feeling horny and didn't know I should be cooped up during a time like this lol) to see and think how people vomit ?" It didn't take her much to agree with me, I wonder if she was really into it too or I conditioned it or simply being the pushover she is but I ended up with lovely stories nonetheless 😭😭 She'd actually go into details every time I asked about it.

Once in grade 6, we were sitting on opposite corners and she was so far but I could see her because I was seated behind and her in the front. I did everything other than paying attention in the class and naturally it was directed to her since she's my best friend. I saw her bow down and hide her face but couldn't guess what it was, thought she dropped something. Then after few seconds, she held a handkerchief on hand to ask for teacher's permission to go to washroom, she then slapped that piece of cloth to her mouth and ran away. (The restroom was on 3rd floor and we were on 5th). It was near break time so I was really desperate for the class to end since I figured what happened (or at least hoped for my fantasies to come true). I couldn't wait so I asked teacher to let me go too, teacher asked me to be patient for another 10 min but I made up excuses (perks of being a girl lol) but by the time I reached, she was already finished and was washing away her vomit from the sink. I was so disappointed (wise enough not to say it out loud thankfully) but I rubbed her back nonetheless and started helping her to clean up.... Outside it must have looked like I was some selfless person but in reality, I was feeding my deranged fantasy. I so hoped that she'd start throwing up again but that didn't happen till two classes after the break and apparently the nurse saw her puke the first time so when she was there again puking for the second time, the nurse asked her to visit infirmary and rest there for a while. Apparently she threw up again after taking antacids so that's a total of 3 times she puked. The nurse contacted our teacher and said that the student is sick and needs to get home, since her bag was there, I volunteered but teacher won't let me 😭😭 after gruelling hours and school and way back home, I find messages in mom's keypad phone from her father's number (suffice to say that they were the owner but we possessed the phones) saying that she has vomited four more times and planning to see doctor after her stomach settles a little. She takes the next day off. Apparently it was a case of food poisoning.

The next incident happened in grade 9, We had a conflict before and were still recovering from that so I didn't keep much tab.... and I was too occupied with my bf but we occasionally chatted, although not as openly as before but yea ... To make matters worse, we were assigned to seperate classes so we could only meet in break time, anyways, the classes were adjacent and the windows faced corridor, saw her go towards washroom with a classmate. That was around the second period. Didn't notice for the next two periods but when I went to her class during break, couldn't find her. After going home, asked if everything was alright and she said she apparently puked over 5 times at school and 4-5 times at home and still wasn't done. I asked her to go into details and she said that she has been feeling queasy but that's her regular routine but by the end of first period, she could feel the nausea was serious. She didn't think she'd throw up but just to be cautious, she wanted to at least wash her face. She's already shy and above all, too sick to ask the teacher, the classmate I saw her with noticed something was off (seated close) and asked if everything is alright, maybe she made some expression to give away that she's nauseous, didn't mention so I stick to her slapping her palm to mouth. The girl asked the teacher if she could take my best friend to the washroom since she wasn't feeling well and thankfully the washroom was near this time, on the same floor. Apparently she herself didn't know how severe it was until she crossed the door. And as she said, the sight of washroom door was enough to make her gag and the food rush up. She ran and puked her guts out while that classmate continued to rub her back. That was the first time and apparently a lot came up in one heave... Like... There are times when there are lots of heaving where only small amount comes up and there are times someone is finished with three or four heaves but the vomit rushes like a faucet running in full speed. But damn, she heaved a lot of times and a lot came up according to her, like there was no break ! (I started regretting ever having conflict or being seperated). So after she was done vomiting, she started to wash her mouth when she started to feel sick again and welp, the second time too, that classmate got to witness... After that, they returned to classroom and when she apologized for disgusting display, the other girl said that it's alright and she's rather worried about her health. Glad there was someone genuinely concerned because if I had the memory video taped in my brain, I'd permanently touch myself while playing it in my mind... Apparently for the third time too the girl accompanied but for the fourth time, no teacher was there so she could rush to the wc alone. Again it was a cleaning staff who suggested her to go home and she also attested to the fact that she herself saw my best friend get violently sick to our sceptical teacher who thought my best friend was making up lies.

I just wish I at least was there for the first round !! 😭😭 I've only ever seen her gag but never vomit. Some people gag loudly but are silent when vomit comes up with occasional sounds of burps... I wonder what's it like for her, but she sure has distinctive gag. I don't fkin understand my preferences but damn I didn't spare my best friend ! In my defence, she was hot... Her fault for being hot and on top of that, HAVING A SENSITIVE STOMACH WITH A SEXY DRY HEAVE.... Imagine a curvy exactly where a degenerate like it with a stomach bloated enough to show movements through the intrusive piece of cloth, trying to keep her long hair away from getting messed up while holding onto chest in hopes for relief while waiting for the inevitable.... God I can vividly picture her in a camisole, sitting by a toilet and waiting for vomit to come up... Thankfully, even though I can't figure out my specific preferences, I at least know that emotional attachment is not one of the criteria and I can totally not get horny hearing about specific person talking about their vomiting stories and genuinely worry.... Or at least stay neutral. I remember how I came to be friends with another sensitive stomach girl who'd often text "just threw up" or "threw up in the (time)"... The idea is sexy but the person depends.... Would've excused myself for me time if it were my best friend but I could genuinely worry about this girl... Oh lord, I love my brain for retaining vivid memories of these instances 😭😭💗 My next destination now would be ThisVid... See you around !

[karlie-what-you-want]

Some friends she has? Really, her mom dad and brother were all there yesterday. Have you ever considered that everything Taylor does is branding? One era she wants private, one era she just wants to support her big Neanderthal bf , and it’s not her fault she’s on camera. She is a 34 year old woman and she is doing what she wants & if or when it goes to hell she will pull out her victim card (again) she’s worse than Kim k at this point , she’s like a reality show attn seeker

I think you’re on the wrong blog anon.

I said what I said, and I’m very aware of the branding aspects of it. What I saw at that game last night was disturbing to me, though. As a long-time fan, I’ve never seen her look that way, and it’s just getting worse.

Everyone at these games with her has something to gain by associating with her. I’ve seen people say that those friends don’t need PR and are just there to support her, but that’s just as ridiculous as saying Taylor herself doesn’t need PR.

I feel like I’m seeing two sides of a story unfolding at the same time. The branding side that you pointed out, and the woman behind the mask who is tired and struggling. Yes, her family was there with her last night, and I was very disappointed to see that they didn’t care to step in when she was clearly anxious and troubled. They’re allowing the world to watch her crumble so that they can get their pay day.

The only one I saw offering what appeared to be real comfort was Blake, and in that moment Taylor was literally rocking back and forth anxiously, looking like she was about to fall apart.

[brainrotgoverner]

Okay SO. You said your ask was always open for fanfic ideas and I. Kinda wanted to ask if you had planned a sequel for Mistletoe on Valentine's Day. And I don't mean a ~spicy~ sequel (although it would be just as welcomed) but a "how do these two interact from now on?".

Are they in a relationship? Do they act all embarrassed with each other the next time they meet? Did they go far enough to skip a few bases the same day of their first kiss? And how are they coping with it? How will their relationship evolve from this?

I can't stop imagining the next prince charming a few books later walking in on his mother/the queen/the evil step-mother making out with the girl of his dreams and THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS.

So, yeah. I know you probably have lots of WIPs already, so this is mostly me venting what my brain had thought today 👀

Yes I am open for ideas! (AND IM SO GLAD YOU ASKED)

I do want to make a sequel for 'Mistletoe on Valentines day' but there isn't really any planning in this moment for the exact reason you brought up XD I don't know if I want to make it ✨spicy✨ and finally bring the smut tag to this little but awesome fandom or go the 'time skip' route and wrote about these dorks trying to navigate their new...situation. (because it's not really a relationship, not yet <3)

Now onto your questions;

-No, it's not really a relationship yet. I don't think neither Chase nor Buddy has much experience with relationships (In my headcanon; Chase is too obsessed with idols and developed very high standards. Combine it with his mom being sick and he hadn't really dated much. I also headcanon Buddy literally grew up in Ex Libris and I don't think they allow dating, so again, not much experience) I doubt they would want to rush into one. More like pining, awkward flirting, and escapades. They would definitely want to take it to the next level, maybe go on a date but 1-) Buddy still needs to take Chase's key back 2-) They only know each other in books and didn't interact that much outside of their spats 3-) Ex Libris

So, yeah, they have a long way to go XD

-Yes they do act all embarrassed the next time they see each other. There would be lots of blushing, evaiding eyes, and stumbling over words XD They both don't really know how to handle this <3

-They wouldn't go all the way on the first day they kissed, no. But there would be enough action that they would need to clean up after if you catch my drift XD

-I think Buddy would be very deep guilt and shame. Not because of Chase, no, but because he feels like he betrayed Ex-Libris. Fraternized with the enemy. Worse, it wasn't just going with the flow. He specially asked to continue and he couldn't stop thinking about it. All the feelings he repressed about the 'annoying' blondie surfaced at the same time. Also, it's his first kiss. So, yeah, he is overwhelmed lol

And Chase is pretty pumped up he might get a hot goth bf who kinda looks like his body pillow <3 maybe a bit worried because Buddy seems like a very classy guy with high standards and he doesn't want to disappoint him. But overall? Pretty good <3

-Oh it WILL develop into something openly sincere (emphasis on the 'openly' part. They were both kinda into each other but repressed it cuz enemies to lovers <3) they just need a bit of time and effort from both sides.

AND YEP they are NOWHERE near as sneaky as they think they are and have to frequently abandon books because the stepsisters can't be mean to Cinderella since the poor maid got traumatised after walking in on her with stepmother and gossip travels fast XD

BUT THANK YOU SO MUCH thanks to you I got to write my thoughts down and this actually cleared up my brain XD I think im going to do two different follow ups to that fic;

1-) ✨spice✨

2-) Them trying to navigate their new situation and traumatising a few book characters on the way

[wontheworld]

“Not your fault”

Paring: fem!reader x bf!Jungwon

Genre: sad fluff (?)

Summary: y/n feels guilty after the passing of her mom, Jungwon comforts her

Warnings: kissing, mention of death, guilt

Word count: 239 (short asf )

Notes: not proofread! English is not my first language (Ik English more than my native language 😭) , first time writing for tumblr <3

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“It’s not your fault, don’t cry” Jungwon comforted his crying girlfriend. Oh how he hated seeing her like this.

“Jungwon.” She sniffed “i-i was the worse daughter anyone could ask for.” She cried even more in his chest as he squeezed her tighter.

her mother had died recently. She took all the blame for it; although Jungwon tried to comfort her it was no use.

“ y/n don’t say that.” He said pulling back to get a closer look at her face “your mother was proud of you! She would hate to see her baby girl crying like this. She’s in a better place now she’s watching over you as we speak.” He spoke

She looked up and weakly smiled at him “she’s probably disappointed in me right now.” She laughed as Jungwon rubbed her back

“I don’t think so.” he spoke “She’s not disappointed she’s happy she can look at you any time she wants to! She doesn’t have to worry about you anymore, right?” Jungwon said and kissed her forehead

She sighed and held his cheeks in her hands. Quietly observing her perfectly made boyfriend that Heaven sent down to her.

She smiled at him a last time before kissing his lips softly as tears ran down her face constantly.

She broke away from the kiss “i love you.” She said as her voice cracked making him smile

“I love you more than you could imagine”

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

©️wontheworld

Hope it was at least a little good <3 first time writing a imagine on tumblr lmaoo hope it gets at least one note hehe

Song for today:

[girltomboy]

Bf came over last night and eventually told me he actually lied to me for 8 months and he never really quit smoking. Just stopped doing it in front of me or before meeting up with me and I believed all this time that he actually stopped. Last spring. And he was even supported by his mom in his lie. She was in on it. And they did it because they hoped eventually he would actually be able to stop. And I said this is the last nail in the coffin of our relationship, because to elaborate a lie this strong and this lasting is just evil no matter which way you spin it. All this time I even asked him a bunch of times if he ever smoked since "quitting" and he said no?? And he said it in his lying tone but I just thought I was crazy, I thought EYE was the crazy one!! I wouldn't even have been mad, I would have understood I mean there's people who try to quit smoking their whole lives. It could take years. And he even lied to our friends, like my best friend and her bf were in awe, they were so admirative of him and his ability to drop smoking so quickly and with relatively little treatment. And he said my praises and the fact that I was proud of him made him feel good, but how good can something fake and artificial make you feel??!! Mixed with the knowledge that you're LYING!!???? He just cried and told me he was scared of disappointing me, as if lying doesn't disappoint me a billion times worse, and he knows it. And I still decided to stay and give it another go. I think mostly out of fear of breaking up, but ironically I can't stop seeing him like a stranger now. I can't trust him like before, and frankly I don't think I'll be able to anytime soon. And if only this was the first situation of this sort, but our whole almost 5 year relationships has been sprinkled with massive lies. This one takes the cake. It's not even that serious but the fact that he was able to carry on for so long, look me in the eyes and lie to me all this time, so many times he could have taken responsibility and said "actually- " but he didn't. And I trusted him because I wanted to stop being so distrustful. And I was wrong to be so. But do I want to be in a relationship where I'm constantly investigating and questioning things? I really don't. We were able to have a mature and honest conversation. I only love the person I thought he was - this one?? I don't know him.

[aemondsbabygirl]

Thank you Erin @persephonerinyes for tagging me ! 🩷

The most painful love crush/disappointment in real life? 😵

When I was 13 or 14, I had a huge crush on a guy who moved next to my place. My crush on him was exacerbated by the fact that he was american, had shoulder length shaggy blond hair and used to skateboard. In my little french town in the suburbs of Paris, you rarely saw americans. He was the talk of the town and so out of my league, of course I wanted him. He also was a year older than me. AND to make it worse, the word in town was that he was in love with a girl whose name was victoria. Little me thought of course it was me lmao. But of course, it was a completely different girl who was GORGEOUS, tanned skin with green eyes, I didn't stand a chance 🥲

The funny thing though, two years later we were at our town’s fair, I was older, out of puberty and had a little bit of a glow up. He saw me and asked me out. I was so petty that I turned him down just to make him suffer 😂🤭 "Didn't want me back then, won't have me now, fuck you" was what was going on in my head.

What was your first real date like/what do you imagine your first real date would be like? 😇

My first date was at a mall, he bought me a pair of shoes and we had ice cream.

What would be the most awkward situation for you on a date/has happened to you while dating? 😐

My first adult kiss was awkward because we were sitting on bench that was surrounded by other benches. There were a lot of people around and he decided to kiss me then🙈. And a long kiss with tongue and all. I was awkward, because I felt everyone watching us. When we stopped, there was indeed a grandpa watching us intently.

What was your first kiss like/what do you imagine your first kiss would be like? 😚

So it depends, what I desccribed just above was my first "real" kiss. But when I was in primary school, my best friend and I had a crush on the same boy. We were so innocent back then, she suggested we both kiss him so we could share him. Ofc he agreed, so we went in a secluded area of the playground and he kissed us, one after the other. I don't know if it counts as a "first kiss" though cause we were kids.

Do you have any sexual quirks that others would find strange/is there anything you would never do when it comes to sex? 😬

I don't know what counts as quirks. Well, I'm into BDSM and I'm a sub. I have a lot of responsibilities in real life, so I take great pleasure from relinquishing everything in bed, and having my partner be in charge instead. One time, I tried to breach the subject of being a sub and liking to be choked and spanked, with my college friends but they found it disgusting and wouldn't understand it lol So yeah, some people find it strange.

What's the kinkiest thing you've ever done/could do with your partner? 🥵

I'm a very kinky person. There isn't much I wouldnt try except scat, piss and strong physical pain. As for a kinky thing that I did: once my bf at the time, fingered me while we were watching a movie with his mom, brother and his brother's wife, in the same room. Or maybe the time I had sex with a lifeguard at a waterpark, in the pool he was supposed to be guarding (no one was around or in it, except us when it happened).

The most romantic thing ever? 💕

I dont remember many romantic gestures 🤔. I don't know if it counts as romantic, but one time when I was 18, I was at a friend’s house, her parents were extremely religious (they're actually in a sect) and very strict. I was in a guestroom by myself at night during my stay. And a guy I was talking to (I had only seen him once), really wanted to see me, and he lived nearby. He came by at night when they slept, climbed through the little balcony to see me. It was in an apartment at the third floor. Thankfully we didn't get caught but he broke a rib on his way out 😂.

Tagging @kaelabear @wolfdressedinlace @theoneeyedprince & @liv-cole :)

Valentine's Day Q&A

I want to get to know you a little better, and there's no better day for dirty questions than Valentine's Day! Choose which part of the question you want to answer and, of course, only do it if you feel like it! It will be perfectly fine if you skip answering some questions. 😌

The most painful love crush/disappointment in real life? 😵

Do you remember the scene in Glass Cuts Deepests when Wright tells Aemond about her ex boyfriend putting a flower behind other girl's ear? Well, that happened to me, just we weren't together, but I was completely in love with him before I met my husband and this scene was DEVASTATING to watch!

What was your first real date like/what do you imagine your first real date would be like? 😇

I went on my first date ever with my husband (although we both said it was just a friendly meeting). We went to the cinema together to see the movie Green Book. I kept shushing him because he wanted to talk to me during the show, haha.

What would be the most awkward situation for you on a date/has happened to you while dating? 😐

It's not really strange, but I burst out laughing because one of my husband's first compliments to me was "I can't stop looking at your socks" with Michelangelo's naked David on them.

What was your first kiss like/what do you imagine your first kiss would be like? 😚

My husband was suffering from a huge hangover after his friends birthday party which he had attended the day before. He felt sick and I asked if he wanted to take a nap (we were in the room he was renting) and he asked what I would do then. I said that I could fall asleep at any time of the day or night (it's true) and we ended up lying next to each other.

Of course, he suddenly didn't feel like sleeping, and my first kiss (with my consent, because what could I do? He would never have dared to do it if he was sober) tasted of vodka (of course, he was taking a shower etc. before I came, it's just that after so much alcohol, you actually sweat vodka). 😂

Do you have any sexual quirks that others would find strange/is there anything you would never do when it comes to sex? 😬

Neither I nor my husband are into oral sex at all. We've tried and we both can't concentrate, we both only think about the fact that someone will accidentally make the other person uncomfortable. We had a conversation about it and agreed that it simply wasn't for us. 😂

We both also abhor bodily fluids and often laugh about it after everything "blehhh take it away from me" is the order of the day. We are having a good time tho, haha!! 😂

What's the kinkiest thing you've ever done/could do with your partner? 🥵

I would let him spank my ass until I cried. 😇

The most romantic thing ever? 💕

My hubby giving me food and brushing my hair while laying next to me when I'm sad. 😭

None pressure tags: @ewanmitchellcrumbs; @targaryenrealnessdarling; @humanpurposes; @aegonx; @black-dread; @sapphirehearteyes; @aemvnd; @zenka69; @at-a-rax-ia; @malfoytargaryen @blackswxnn @toodlesxcuddles @kckt88 @immyowndefender @bellaisasleep @persephonerinyes @alphard-hydraes-blog @zaldritzosrose @aveatquevale- @fan-goddess @lottie-blue-star @fullmoonworshipper

+ anyone who feels like it of course!!!

[firewoodfigs]

long rant ahead 🙃

[juhaksworld]

TBZ reactions to you forgetting what day their birthday is

(not exactly an au but let’s just pretend you can’t look up their birthdays online bc they’re idols lol)

Sangyeon:

lowkey hurt. (you meanie -_- ) like one day you were sitting together talking and you were like “oh my goodness I’m so excited for my birthday in a few months bc it’ll be a reason for us to get the day off and spend all day together and he’ll be like “we could do that for my birthday too!” and you’d be like “.....yeahhhhh!!!!! but ummm when is your birthday?? I’m really sorry I forgot. I’m terrible at remembering dates and stuff” and he’d be like “in two weeks” and you’d instantly feel so bad bc this poor boy deserves better (you meanie x2) you’d keep apologizing and he’d forgive you in his heart but he’d pretend to be sad the rest of the day just to make you feel bad ( as you deserve ) and you’d like make it up to him by planning this super sweet day with him and get him the awesomest gift and he’d tell you he wasn’t actually mad at you for forgetting but you’d make sure never to forget any important date again bc having sangyeon sad/upset with you was too heart wrenching,, even if it was just a joke.

Jacob:

you’d be like going through your calendar at the beginning of the year making sure you have everyone’s birthdays put in correctly and you’d casually ask him when his was and he’d be like “????” thinking it was a joke since y’all had been dating for like 3 years. and then you’d look up and realize how awful you must seem for not remembering so you’d make excuses like “i knowwww when your birthday is i’m just double checking….*blushes*” jacob would start giggling and then come sit beside you and hug you and be all sweet and say something like “ahh it’s alright! don’t feel bad at all!” but then he wouldn’t tell you to make you feel bad and you have to go searching through your pictures from last year to find the right day. he’d just laugh bc he knows you didn’t forget bc he’s not important,,, you’re just kinda forgetful. he’d tease you about it a lot. maybe he’d pretend to forget your birthday one day just to get back at you lol.

Younghoon:

he would think you were joking at first and be like “stahpppp you know when my birthday is!” and you’d be like “ummmm hoonie i don’t actually” and then he’d just be like shocked and a little hurt and then he’d start explaining to you about how his birthday was in fact the DAY OF HIS BIRTH INTO THIS WORLD and without his birthday there would be no Kim Younghoon. and you’d just be like “i know...why birthdays umm..are important hoonie” but he’d keep lecturing you about why you should remember and you’d feel so bad. he wasn’t upset,,, just shocked you could forget something like that. eventually you’d be like “i understand hoonie” and make an excuse to leave the room and then you’d call chanhee and desperately ask him to tell you when hoonie’s birthday was. chanhee would laugh at you but finally give in and then you’d rush back to hoonie and be like “BAEEEEEE YOUR BIRTHDAY IS AUG. 8TH!!!!!!” and he’d be like “duhhh” anyways,,, you’d avoid bringing that situation up with him or chanhee bc it was too embarrassing.

Hyunjae:

after he realized you were serious he’d just laugh in your face. like he wouldn’t be hurt at all he’d just think it was hilarious,, especially since you were so flustered about it and embarrassed for forgetting. he’d go on and on with you about how you “ForGOt HiS biRthDay” and you’d be pretty sure it was in the first half of Sept. but you just weren’t 100% positive, but he wouldn’t tell you and he wouldn’t let any of the other boyz tell you either. then at the end of the day he’d ask for your hand and you’d give it to him...a little afraid of what he was gonna do with that black marker he was holding. he’d write “SEPTEMBER 13TH 1997” in bold thick lettering on your wrist. and you’d be like “SKJDKDJFKSJDH WHY’D YOU WRITE THAT SO BIG WITH A MARKER??? NOW IT WON’T COME OFF!!!!” and he’d just laugh and be like “well,,, hopefully you won’t forget my birthday now!” then he’d kiss you on the cheek and run away for his life.

Juyeon:

clueless,,, he’d be like “you forgot my birthday?? for real? this isn’t a prank?” and you’d be like “i’m sorry T-T” he’d do that face like he’d just blink a couple of times looking at you with a slightly disappointed blank face like “ur serious bae?” and you’d try so hard not to laugh bc he looked so funny and cute but you’d feel so guilty. so you’d go on to explain that you were just having a “blond moment” and you couldn’t think of it. you knew when his birthday was...you were just blanking out right then. so you’d change the subject and cross your fingers that you would remember his birthday later and then you’d write it down 30 different times in different places and add a reminder for his birthday and a reminder to remember his birthday bc,,, you never wanted to admit to juyeon that you actually forgot his birthday. he was always so good at remembering all the important dates that had anything to do with you,,, so you wanted to be better at remembering as well 

Kevin:

he’d be so butt hurt over this oml. he would 100% never tell you and just sulk all day bc he always makes such a big deal out of your birthday that takes weeks of planning and you just ??FORGOT?? his???? a baby lol. even after you remembered and very loudly exclaimed “OOOOHHHHH YEAHHH OFC!!!! HOW STUPID OF ME FOR FORGETTING” he’d still sulk. you’d have to do some serious explaining of yourself and apologizing and everything. he’d watch you put it in your calendar and turn on reminders every day for a week leading up to his bday. would quiz you randomly after that asking you if you remembered his birthday. you’d have to prove your loyalty to him by remembering some small detail about him that was super important to him before he would completely forgive you.

Chanhee:

disappointed but not surprised lol. would just roll his eyes and be like “why must you be this way?” you’d feel bad,,, but not like super embarrassed bc he wouldn’t make a big deal about it. would tease you a little bit and pretend to be hurt,, but you would know he was just pretending. would ask you if you remembered other ppl’s bdays and when you could,,, he’d tease you even more “i feel like i should be jealous, y/n, that you remember juyeon’s birthday so quickly but not mine...your own bf of 2 years” he’d keep asking you randomly throughout the day if you could remember,,,, and when you finally did remember ( or you secretly asked on of the other boyz ) he would stop teasing you as much and just tell you you had to get a certain (expensive) gift for his birthday to make up for forgetting lmao

Changmin:

Laughs when you ask when his birthday is and then after a minute he’s like “wait--- you were being serious???” and you wouldn’t want to admit it bc you know he can get offended easily over certain things sometimes so you’re like “well...i mean...i know when it is...i just can’t..umm...remember...right now….” *nervous laugh* he wouldn’t exactly be upset..more surprised and a little confused like how do you literally forget your own bf’s birthday you weirdo. he’d just give you this judging look like “????” and that would make you feel even worse than if he openly was offended...somehow. anyway you’re like “i’ll just----- wait until it comes back to me...never mind” and you’ll quickly walk away or change the subject bc you hate having him look at you like you’re the biggest idiot of the century. changmin’s just like “this girl. what a strange person I’m dating”

Haknyeon:

he would be sad,,,like “oh my goodness, how did she forget???” I feel like he tends to overthink so he’d just be so astounded and depressed that you had forgotten such an important fact about him. so he begins to ask you other questions about himself to make sure you hadn’t forgotten everything about him like “what’s my mom’s name” “what year was I born” “when did we start dating” “what’s my favorite food at the moment” etc etc. and you just feel so terrible bc this poor buy is convinced that you don’t love him anymore and he just :(((  

[i’m sad writing this y’all ;-; ] 

so anyways,,, you’re like “listen hak,,, the reason i’m randomly asking when your birthday is is bc it’s my literal password and i forgot. I forget everything. you should know that by now T___T it’s not bc I don’t think it’s important to remember.” and hak would be like uwuwuwuwuwu “my birthday is your password?? that’s so cuteeee!!! <3 and then he’d tell you and forgive you bc,,, hak is like that

Sunwoo:

butt hurt pt.2. he’d sulk and sulk. “You can’t remember my own birthday baby???” pouts. you’d have to explain yourself thoroughly and even though he knows you sometimes forget important things,,, he’s still surprised and slightly offended. would say something like “you’re not allowed to have any kisses until you remember” and normally that wouldn’t be that bad of a threat bc you were sure you’d remember after a while,,, but you didn’t want him to be even more offended than he already was so you pretended to be heartbroken by this threat and started to act all desperate to find out his birth date (even though you originally just wanted it to put on a little drawing you were working on beside your bday lol ) and so you’ll like all frantically call chanhee on the phone asking when sunwoo’s birthday was (making it seem like a secret from sunwoo even though you made sure he heard) and then you proudly went to sunwoo and told him you remembered the date and by then he was laughing bc he realized how silly he was for being so sad. (you got a kiss on the top of your head for “remembering” lol)

Eric:

lowkey confused and highkey amused. you forgot his birthday??? lol. Is how he thinks. so like one day you were just talking with him and he was telling stories about his birthday a few years ago, before you started dating… and then you realized that you could not for the life of you remember when his birthday was...you were pretty sure it was in december...but that’s all you could remember so you asked him after he was done telling you a story. and he laughed and was like “duhhh it’s December 22nd” and you were like “OOOHHHHHH YEAHHHHH HOW COULD I FORGET???” and then he was like “wait--- you actually forgot??” and you were like “Ummm yeahhh,,,,, sorry ;-;” and then he was like “SHOOT i shouldn’t have told you so i could use that as a bribe against you!!” and you just [-_-] anyways he’ll randomly think of that throughout the day and be like “omg guys my own gf forgot my birthday. none of y’all have it as hard as i do” and then he’d pretend to be sad lol.

[feuqueerfire]

Never Let Me Go Ep 6 Live Blogging

I have to leave for uni before this starts airing and have classes until 1.5 hours after it stops airing T.T I’ll try to watch some of it in the 2 hours I have before my next class after that (technically that’s enough time to watch the whole thing twice but it took me like 4 hours to watch Ep 5 lmao)

Read the r/boyslove on-air thread while on the bus bc i couldn’t watch the show while it was airing and at first people’s thoughts on ben were really pissing me off but then i read more and a lot of the comments with fewer upvotes reflected my feelings about the ben and nueng and coming out situation so i feel less irritated ig

Episode 6: Escape

6-1

Beautiful Phuwin in his dark green collared shirt that shows off his necklace

Lol the person talking with Palm and then Palm’s mom is cute and funny lol

The “which one of you is Palm?” seriously kills me

Oh they’re just gonna tell Palm’s mom that they’re here for vacay interesting

Plsss gave Palm, Neung, and me all a heart attack when she suggested Palm and Neung might have same father

Aw Palm 😭 his mother complaining and him being like “If we’re too much of a burden to you, we can go” poor guy

6-2

Linguistics: Palm’s mom uses gu-meung with them (like Chpper’s dad)

Neung outright said that Uncle Kit probably behind the attack, so that makes me think no?

Girl “will you tell your mom about our relationship?” And the immediate “What is our relationship?” Like my goodness and Neung being like about working for my family while Palm was definitely hoping for something else rip

Linguistics: Palm back to using Neung instead of Khun Neung but this time he seems to really want to and is using the title to his full advantage “Ai’Neung, you should go take a shower first” and then the -krab coming back when he says he was just practicing

Palm’s mom putting Neung to work and shutting down his advice. Neung character development era incoming as she treats him in a way others don’t

Lmfao they’re putting Phuwin’s English to good use with this show

Pls not Neung and Wu conversing in Mandarin while their bfs Palm and David just stand and stare

Neung’s eyes lasering in on the guys holding hands in public

Pls this scolding in Mandarin

That kiss convo smhhh I should rewatch and comment on it again when I have time

Rewatch: Palm insinuates and Neung accepts that the kiss was just part of Palm doing his job and trying to make Neung feel better rip but Neung's clearly disappointed about it and tells Palm to go that far again to make him feel better because "A kiss is special. It's meaningful."

6-3

please I think Neung always making Palm tell the sellers that food is delicious (the roti something from that uncle and now the Khua Kling from Tam) "Is it delicious?" "Yes." "Don't tell me, tell [seller]"

Palm obsessed with how Neung's lips look after eating the spicy food

Palm's mom catching on that there's something off about how Palm interacts with Neung and being like hmm are y'all dating

Palm's mom being baffled by the incredulous situation first but also saying some harsh truths like "what happens if Palm gets caught in the crossfire?" "If Palm dies, they'll just find someone to replace him." but also hits at Palm's weak point of only being considered a servant

6-4

oh interesting dynamic "I don't have money. Can you praise me for my effort?" "No. If you want to wow me, it has to be more special than this."

Neung's self-pitying is a wild ride "my life is worse than the cowherd and the weaver"

Neung getting irritated about Palm bringing him to a place where Tam's bf brought her when he's not Palm's bf and also getting irritated that Palm has to carry around a gun bc of his duty

bruhhh not Neung being like I’ll buy this beach so that it doesn’t get overrun by tourists like oh you’re such an asshole rich city kid

oh? Neung, you only show the side of yourself to Palm that you want him to see? And why is this side including your romantic side now? heh

lmfao no way Palm said “so you’re only showing me your good side? because that’s the only side I see” like be serious Palm, he’s in fact showing you soooo many of his flaws. You seem to like him despite them

Got spoiled on before watching:

just a few moments from preview of last ep and a few screenshots on twitter but nothing much

Overall Thoughts:

lmfao interesting choice of episode right after these kids’ parents got shot at. No worrying sick, no Neung losing his shit? 

Seems like we’ll get back to the events of that and aftermath (people wondering where Neung is) in the next episode. This was just the ‘escape away from the city’ beach episode that’s in like nearly every BL and sometimes they progress things a lot emotionally but I don’t necessarily think that they did that this episode, either? They had touching conversations in the last part when they spent time at the scenic locations but they’ve had conversations about love and romance before too. 

idk I feel like going away, meeting Palm’s mom, some heart-to-hearts could’ve been like half an episode and we could’ve gotten something else for the latter 20 minutes of the show? It’s just a really slowing of the pace after last ep had a whooole bunch of stuff happening. Not really a terrible ep or anything but not a fave.

Actually I know what would’ve made the episode better: A transition in how they treat each other or their dynamic. In Bad Buddy, even though I thought the beach eps were boring, they provided crucial relationship development and the change in scenery was significant. Here, if Palm went and started dropping to gu-meung and Neung for the whole time instead of just in front of his mom, if they got to a more equal ground away from Neung’s family, I would’ve liked it more. Instead, we still have Khun Neung krab when they’re alone and Palm focusing on protecting Neung. We do have some semblence of change in their personal characters though because Palm’s more open now where he knows how things go, rather than under his dad and Neung’s family’s thumb whereas Neung doesn’t know much about this life.

Nueng, not Neung: bruhhh I just understood why people keep calling him Noong or Noo-ang and stuff instead of how his name’s pronounced. I just read the name to be how I would type it based on how it’s pronounced but that’s not correct ahh

Fave Scene:

idk, nothing super stood out. maybe that one part where Palm called him Ai’Nueng 

Posts I made

None

Most viewers that I saw per part during the premiere:

1: ? || 2:10k || 3:15k || 4:18k

12 hours later 

Aw fuck I forgot, so here it is 35 hours later

Part 1: 916k || 2: 633k || 3: 591k || 4: 676k

Avg: 704k

Views Tracking (just because I’m curious): 

The day after NLMG release, so 8 days instead of just a week later

Ep 1 - 1: 1.970M (173k) || Avg: 1.261M (+108k) || Max Part: 1

Ep 2 - 1: 1.272M (+103k) || Avg: 1.017M (+88k) || Max Part: 1

Ep 3 - 1: 1.080M (+105k) || Avg: 935k +(96k) || Max Part: 1

Ep 4 - 1: 1.301M (+159k) || Avg: 998k (+140k) || Max Part: 1

Ep 5 - 1: 1.073M || Avg: 937k || Max Part: 1 (also part 3 with kiss has 1.044M)

[lolitalempicka]

why is it that everytime it seems things are going well its all a lie snd im back to square 1

i talked to my mom face to face about how im going to a rehab for my ed and she completely took away my miserable last bit of desire i had to get well, she basically said i dont look ill snough and called me fat... sshe said this to a literal anorexic severly underweight... i know for sure i am worse than last year mentally AND m physically speaking but shes convinced its not like tgat just because this is my normalcy now and im so good at masking my unwellness and im on my feet and not comatose in a bed. her point being the fact im seeking help/ conscious of my situation means its not that bad and not a mental illness i just forget to take care of myself. and my brain says fuck you but also shit shes right. i literally have a written diagnosis from a doctor for the first time in my life which is so scary and unreal but i feel again like im faking it and dont deserve treatment because clearly i wont be sick until i look fucking dead. last night i felt OUT like i am not present atm i ended up getting drunk, vent to my bf on the phone which wasnt helpful at all just made me feel like i was disappointing him. then binge + throw up right next to my parents room where they were sleepin which is something i didnt do even when i was a teen and fall asleep at 11 which means i woke up now that is almost 4 am bc i dont sleep more than 5-6 hours at night. Yea. rn i feel gross, sober, stressed bc later im supposed to see my friends and go to a party but i dont wanna and at the same time the thought of being alone is not comforting anymore bc i know im just gonna lose control if i am. so shouls i go full crazy publicly or do the pretend game once again, do my little theatre thing like i always do and wear my pretty dress and please. i am terrified of not conforming. im used to looking like i have it all together my mom was right on this, so why should i go through the ordeal of recovery when everyone thinks im a functional person and im the last one who wants to, at this point does it even matter. what use is all this sadness when my heart aches all the time when its open

[compassionatereminders]

Hey so I've never done this before like venting online and stuff I guess u could call it venting but lately I guess these past months I've been feeling bad again and Idk why like I alwaystry my best to wake up in the mornings have regular showers so I don't forget and I try my best to remember to take my meds but lately I seems like I've lost all energy for life or my self in general and I hate it because I don't want my family seeing me like this because it's harder to fake it everh day and I'm only 18 years old but I still feel like a disappointment to my mom and her bf even because they try to help me as best as they can but idk their ways of help doesn't support me since I do have a disability and mental illness and it's just rely hard especially with online school and I feel more pathetic since I'm always at home with bad anxiety that I was diagnosed a few months ago in 2020 and yeah I just feel drained and all I can do is sleep or stay in bed and scroll through social media and watch shows and stuff and Idk I feel just lonely too since my only good friend moved to Wellington (which I'm very happy for them) but it's like why can't I make something good of my self like she does? I mean they are 17 and already off to collage and I haven't even graduated yet because of my damn brain and how slow I am and how behind I am because I'm different? Idk sorry this was long I'm just idk who to trust to speak my mind about anything with anyone especially in my own family which us just constant drama and negativity which also isn't healthy for anyone so yeah sorry for bothering u I just don't know what to do anymore lol I'm not interested in anything like everyone else is in my life with their jobs and such Idk :/

I'm so sorry you're feeling this way, but you can't compare yourself to people who don't share your struggles. Of course you can't do as much as someone who doesn't suffer from mental illness! That's not you failing, that's a natural consequence of having limitations most people don't have to deal with. So don't compare yourself to abled people please. It isn't fair and it'll only make you feel even worse.

[marikaaajoy]

my relationship with digital art and how BNHA salvaged it

I just wanted to let out my thoughts but I can only do it here :>

This might be a downer for some people but I’d like to share it with people here. BNHA means the world to me and this is why.

I first started drawing when I was 7 years old in 2006

I think it’s ugly now, but 7 year old me remembered being so proud of this because this is a drawing of my stepfather. This is the only drawing I have that was from my childhood. I think the aim here is to draw in anime style BUT I didn’t even watch anime back then. I had a classmate who loves anime and she taught me to draw in school. Drawing became a favorite hobby immediately after that.

Then it was 2013 and I was 14 years old. Drawing is still my favorite thing to do besides being on the computer. I love anime at this point too. My parents bought an iPad for the whole family, but I was almost always the one using it. I discovered an app called ArtStudio and thought “Wow, I can draw without making a mess and with only my fingers” because I was always too lazy to take out my drawing materials and clean up afterwards.

These were my first digital drawings. The pirate one was the very first. I got obsessed real fast. I can color so easily, undo any mistake, layers are a blessing too. There was just so much more freedom. I always sucked at coloring in traditional art and I didn’t like the mess (idk my hands get so messy traditionally)

The next year, it was 2014, I was 15. My birthday is in a couple of months and I knew my parents were planning to buy me something pricey (I think it was a laptop) so I approached them and asked if they could just buy the Wacom Bamboo as a present which was cheaper anyway and I even explained how it works to them and how it would allow me to draw on the computer instead of the iPad. I tried really hard to be convincing. I would have prepared a powerpoint presentation if I had to.

They did give me the wacom as a present. They even gave it to me months before my birthday so I could use it already. I thought I was the luckiest teen in the world with my parents.

These are a collection of my favorite works from 2014 to 2016. The middle one was my second drawing using wacom and Paint Tool SAI. I was a part of a lot of fandoms in those years lol

It gets downhill from there :/

April 2016, my mom and I moved to Japan, while my stepfather and siblings stay in my country. It was tough. For someone who is obsessed with anime, you’d think I’d be thrilled to live in Japan.

I was. Though only at the first few months. It’s not the same as it’s portrayed in anime (I should’ve known but I used to be blinded by anime). It was just lonely. The language barrier sucked and then lots of financial and family issues until my parents split. I got my first boyfriend too and I thought I was blessed by the nicest boy, but the relationship became extremely toxic but I didn’t have it in me to walk away.

All the shit that happened affected me mentally and emotionally. My biggest outlet which was digital drawing, was also out of the question because I did not have a computer/laptop when we moved to Japan. We left it in our home for my stepfather and siblings, even the iPad. I have my wacom with me, but no computer/laptop to use it with. I couldn’t draw.

I tried though. I used my phone to draw, but it wasn’t the same. Then the life problems got piled up, things got worse, and I just lost motivation in anything. Literally anything. From 2016 to 2019, I stopped watching anime, I dropped out of all the fandoms I’m in, I stopped watching my favorite TV series or movies, and I stopped drawing. I even got a bit disconnected with my friends who lived in my country (we talk regularly online). My family was broken so I gave all my attention to my toxic relationship as well which made everything worse too lol

I didn’t draw besides from a few scribbles and the drawings above. I did try digital art on my phone a couple of times again and even posted them on my IG, but they weren’t any good. Eventually, I got mentally and emotionally drained and dropped out of senior high school. I just stayed home for almost a year, leeching off of my mom. I felt even more worthless and my life had no direction at this point. Nothing mattered anymore.

April 2019 or so I think, my (ex)bf bought me a laptop. He says it’s a gift, but I think the real reason was to make up for something horrible that he did (which is stupid because money /gifts won’t resolve anything). I have a laptop. I can draw again, but I didn’t. I didn’t care, I wasn’t interested in drawing anymore anyway.

Welp. June 2019, I went back to my country. My (ex) bf stayed in Japan. The distance helped me end the relationship and my friends were there (they always were) to help put me back together along with two trips to therapy. I went back to finish my senior high school in my own country this time. That said, I have to stay in my country for school (but I was happy because I didn’t wanna go back to Japan yet when the breakup was still fresh and with going back to school, my life has a direction again.)

It was weird. I remember just being sorta lost and confused because I used to put my time, effort and everything into my previous toxic relationship, which was now gone. I was free and I had so much free time that I didn’t know what to do with it. I got so used to doing nothing and being nothing.

This is where BNHA enters.

Dunno when it started, but I started seeing Bakugou frequently online. It’s usually just Bakugou. I knew who he was because my friend suggested BNHA to me back in late 2018 I think but I didn’t watch it since I’ve lost interest in everything at that point in my life.

But ye I thought he hot af but I still didn’t watch BNHA.

But then for some reason he REALLY kept appearing in my social medias and it was really frequent. The last straw was when I saw a pic of him in UA’s gym uniform and thought “damn boi aight imma watch bnha for u” (y’all gotta admit he looks good in those colors with his combat boots XD )

I watched BNHA. Fell in love with Iida along the way. Then I switched to Tokoyami (but Shoji was hot too so aaaaa), but then angry emotionally-constipated sea urchin head caught my heart again. But oof. BakuDeku moments really made me feel some type of way I haven’t felt since I moved to Japan. It felt new but nostalgic. I fell hard in that ship.

I started obsessing. From memes to posts to fanfictions to buying merch to filling my room with BNHA posters. I realized I was reverting to my old self from the time I was still happy and it was thanks to BNHA (and the good people who helped me through the worst too)

Shit I wanted to draw BNHA, I thought.

I mean, I have a laptop, I still have my wacom and drawing softwares. I could totally draw digitally again if I wanted to.

But guess what

I can’t :c

My hand physically cannot draw. My drawings don’t look the way I want them too. 3 years of not drawing really destroyed any skill I had. I was back to square one.

September (yeah they’re ugly, I laughed at it). If you’re wondering why I drew on paper, it’s because, for some reason, I really CANNOT draw digitally. I mean it. I can barely sketch digitally at this point. The lines and shapes just doesn’t come to life. They’re just scribbles. But somehow, I can kinda draw on paper with a ballpoint pen. But yeah, that was the best I could do at this point in my life

After that, I still tried to draw, to regain my old art style, but it didn’t happen... It just doesn’t look or feel the same. Drawing used to be fun. But during this phase, it felt like my ugly drawings were just mocking me (probably was just too emo that time lol)

Weirdly, around a week or two I think, after my half-assed attempts at drawing, I managed to draw digitally somehow o.o

I did a Midoriya and Todoroki drawing like this too. It was my first post here on Tumblr I think. The annoying part here is that I cannot draw digitally unless I draw on paper first, take a pic, and then trace the lineart. I couldn’t draw directly on the computer. Granted, drawing on paper and drawing on digital is very different for me in the first place anyway. But it was still a pain. And it still looked like shit. I can only draw stiff poses :/ it seems like my brain decided to delete all data about anatomy and posture and backgrounds. My lineart here is even messy af. It still really not the same as my old style.

By 2020, I think I got my old art style back. On March, I made this. This took me 27 total of hrs to make.

Right now, I think it’s not bad, but back in March, I was disappointed with the result. This is when I finally broke down crying because it didn’t look good enough and I hated that it took me 27 hrs to draw “bullshit.” I was angry at myself for losing interest in drawing for 3 years when I could’ve used that time to improve. I had to start all over again and it still didn’t look good. (Current me thinks that the drawing above is alright. I was just a lot harsher to myself back then. Used to have a lot of issues but I’m doing great now)

I cried myself to sleep that night. Woke up wanting to cry again. I wallowed in sadness for a couple of days. Eventually told my friends what’s up. Got some pep talk. Even talked to my sister (she’s great, she always hypes me up with my stuff and sometimes I think she’s my biggest fan with how she appreciates my drawings and I’m really grateful for that).

My world turned a 180 and I was weirdly positive after all that crying because brain chemicals and shit. I had a revelation. If I hate how my art style looked so much, then I should have been putting effort in changing my art style, not trying to regain my old art style (that I don’t like anymore)

I researched a lot. I analyzed different art styles and anatomy again. I did everything I could think of to find a style that works for me. I might have even neglected school for a bit to focus on digital art lmao

After all that work, I posted a fanart of middle school BakuDeku in their classroom. I love that fanart so much even if I probably have better ones by now because that was the first fanart I made that I felt like I could be proud of and it was the first one I made in my new art style. It was a milestone for me.

March 2020, I moved back to Japan and without the toxic relationship, I’m a lot positive now. Happy. I’m myself again after the previous bad years. I’m still continuously learning though, trying to improve, but at least, now, I found my own art style :) I really suck at interacting with people online, but I’m always grateful for the support everyone has been giving my fanarts. I’m happy when my content makes people happy.

This is why BNHA is important to me. The series is great alone, but it’s not just that to me. BNHA is so much more. It’s what made me find the passion to create again, only this time, it’s focused on drawing (I used to write, but now I just draw, but maybe I’ll write again for BNHA).

My family is supportive with my love for BNHA, but I think they don’t know the deeper reason why I love it. Sure, I was fine living on with nothing much going on in my life. I’ll finish school, get a job, work until I die or something. It was okay. It was the way of life. But BNHA gave my life color again. I wasn’t just blindly going through life anymore. I have something to look forward to everyday now. BNHA even became a bridge to other things. Ever since then, I’m a lot more open to people, to try new things, to explore and not just live through life and waste away. I got better at leaving my comfort zone. I’ve never been happier in my life :D

Thank you for supporting my fanarts. Thank you so much for giving me a chance to express myself through BNHA. I hope to make more content in the future and improve even more :)

[the-cookie-of-doom]

Well, I want to hear pretty much everything(summer aus are so cute), but to narrow down that a bit, how does the stitch get together happen? And who’s stiles’ boyfriend? A random non-character?

(Summer AUs are the *cutest*) Asshole Boyfriend is just a random non-character, since I couldn’t bring myself to do any canon character that dirty xD And I will happily talk about all the things, but you know me, I need direction xD

Now, given that Stiles is obviously taken, Mitch respects that fact, even though he’s also obviously interested in him too. He won’t snake on someone else’s relationship even though he really wants to, because Stiles deserves better. Like I said, BF doesn’t treat Stiles very well; never calls/texts, takes forever to respond when Stiles makes contact, generally treats him as an unimportant side-project. Stiles tries to hide how disappointed he is every time he gets brushed off, but he doesn’t do a very good job of it. 

Meanwhile you’ve got Mitch whisking him off at every opportunity, going out of his way to include Stiles in his and Katrina’s misadventures. They take him noodling a couple times; Stiles thought it was called nibbling, and Mitch about lost his shit when Stiles so very earnestly asked, “Can we go nibbling?”

One day Stiles has been feeling more down and out than usual, so Mitch decides to take him out for the night. They drive out into a field after dark and pile blankets and pillows in the bed of his pickup to watch the stars, drink some moonshine, and talk about anything and everything. It’s nice. And Stiles can’t help thinking he’s never had someone actually listen to him like this before, like they were actually interested in what he has to say. His BF sure never does. 

And sure enough, speak of the devil. Stiles gets a text from the BF. Just like that, the moment’s gone. Mitch knows it before Stiles even pulls out his phone. He sighs, obviously disappointed, and Stiles checks the text. He doesn’t know if it’s actually his BF sending it or someone else, but that’s definitely his boyfriend enthusiastically making out with some random girl on his lap, and Stiles is crushed. 

When his boyfriend said they were going on a break (And hey, it doesn’t matter, Stiles is leaving for the summer anyway, right?) he never expected something like this. Maybe he should have, though. 

Mitch is pissed on Stiles’ behalf and would gladly go kick his BF’s ass if he weren’t on the other side of the country atm. As it is, he lets Stiles cry on his shoulder and lament how stupid he was for expecting anything different, while Mitch assures him it’s not his fault. Stiles drowns his sorrows in the rest of the moonshine and then kisses Mitch, because fuck it, he wants to feel wanted for once, and Mitch is right there wanting him. 

Mitch really, really likes the turn the night has taken, but also, now really isn’t the time. So he dials Stiles back, because the poor kid is heartbroken right now. And yeah, Mitch wants him, but he doesn’t want to be Stiles’ mistake. He’ll happily rebound for him after Stiles has had some time to think and calm down and sober up, but not tonight. 

They lay together under the stars and Stiles convinces him to make out some more, until they eventually fall asleep. Come morning, Mitch knows they’re going to be in so much trouble for sneaking out late and never bothering to come home. But they’ve got to face the music. 

Mitch drives Stiles back to his grandparents, and it’s a quiet, solemn ride. Stiles is hungover and feels generally awful (not about Mitch, though, that was the only good part of his night), and Mitch is a bit Tense waiting to find out how Stiles feels, if he regrets it. Sure enough Grandma Stilinski is hardly pleased when Stiles come trudging through the front door with his tail between his legs, looking like hell, and with Mitch of all people at his heels. 

She scolds them and says they should’ve known better, how both her and Mitch’s mom were worried sick all night. That just makes Stiles feel worse. Mitch nudges him towards the stairs and waits until he’s gone to tell Grandma S. what happened last night - the PG version, of course. Stiles’ (ex)BF is a tool, Mitch took him out to get his mind off it, and they just lost track of time. She does a complete 180 and is prepared to go beat BFs ass with her trusty wooden spoon for hurting her grandbaby. 

After that, I don’t know what happens xD Mitch probably goes upstairs to check on Stiles and bring him some water, see how he’s doing. Stiles is still miserable and wants to go back to sleep, even though he’s not really tired, just emotionally drained. Maybe he asks Mitch to stay with him for a while longer, and manages to find the words to say he doesn’t regret last night, and is really interested in Mitch, too. 

Also originally, Mitch took some,,, compromising pictures on Stiles’ phone to send to the BF, proof that Stiles has very much moved on and traded up ; ) 

[duker42]

How about where Hope is a lot older, like 15-16 and she's going out with her bf (Levi and his s/o got bad vibes from him but they said anything). Hope felt a little uncomfortable bc they went to a secluded area. her bf tried to push himself onto her but she wasn't ready and ran away crying to her parents. they were shocked to see her back so soon but got so angry when she explained everything. both levi and his s/o go to teach him a lesson >:))))

💜Discipline💜

“I don’t like that kid.” Levi said as he watched Hope and her boyfriend walk out of sight. He stared off at the street where they disappeared, as if it would call his daughter back to him.

“I know you don’t, honey. I don’t either. There’s something about him that screams false charm. But she’s 15 and a soldier herself. It’s time to let her make her own choices.” Y/N said as she looked up from her reports.

It hadn’t been easy for Levi, accepting that his daughter was growing up. That she was no longer the precious little girl that thought he hung the moon. She still adored her father, but boys had become an issue.

They were always around. Dirty little brats. Hope had grown up to look too much like her mother. Too beautiful and it drove Levi crazy to see all the soldiers vying for her attention. Y/N had to calm him down several times.

Y/N had thought that when Joesph, Hope’s boyfriend had started coming around Levi was just being an overprotective father. But over time Y/N had come to have the same feelings about the seemingly charming young Scout. He was full of shit.

He heard the tea kettle start whistling and he moved from the window to the kitchen. Maybe a cup of tea and sitting with Y/N would help ease his worry.

~~~~~

Hope burst in the door “Mom! Dad! I need your help!”

Levi and Y/N were startled and upset at the tears until the girl’s eyes. Levi noticed her shirt was torn, her hair pulled from its elaborate design, his eyes narrowed dangerously.

“What happened?” He demanded, going over to Hope and bringing her over to the couch to examine her.

“Joseph wanted to take me to this place he said he found that I would love. We went to this old house on the edge of town and he...he tried to....” Hope looked down, her fists clenched as she tried to find the words.

Rage filled Levi as he looked at Y/N. The same deadly scowl on her face. “Hope...did he...?” Levi could let say it, didn’t want to say it.

“No! I punched him in the face a few times and kneed him in the groin like you showed me.” Hope said.

Levi was relieved and proud of her. He had made sure her hand to hand combat was better than any of the other brats. She might be small like her parents, but she was an Ackerman. Idiot probably didn’t know what hit him.

“What do you need help with?” Levi asked. Sure he wanted to go beat the little shit within an inch of his life, but she had handled it and gotten away.

“I...I don’t want to be arrested for assaulting him!” Hope cried out, worried about a blemish on her record.

“You won’t be. You were defending yourself against an attack. If he tries to claim otherwise, who do you think your Uncle Erwin will believe?” Y/N said rationally. She knew that Hope had panicked. She never wanted to disappoint any of her extended family in the Survey Corps.

“I believe I’m going to go arrange to have that piece of shit thrown in the dungeon.” Levi said as he leaned over to kiss his daughter’s head. He patted Y/N on the shoulder and his demeanor hardened. The boy just invoked Captain Levi’s wrath.

~~~~~

“I’m telling you, the bitch is crazy! She just attacked me!” Joesph was battered and possibly had a broken nose, but he was still adamantly crying his innocence to the Commander as he stood outside the boy’s cell.

He would have shut his mouth if he had realized those crystal blue eyes of the tall blonde were calculating how he could feed the boy to a Titan while not on an expedition without raising too many eyebrows. He really had underestimated the veterans love for the girl they had a hand in helping raise.

“Sure.” Levi came down the stairs and stood beside Erwin, hot gaze raking over the boy. The fact that there were bars between him and kid was the only thing keeping him from hurting him worse.

Y/N joined her husband as all three watched the realization of his predicament come over his swollen face. “Look...I-I d-didn’t mean f-for....” he started stuttering.

Captain Levi just held up a hand, silencing him. Commander Erwin pushed off the wall and handed him the key to the cell. “Just don’t kill him.” He murmured as he walked by and patted Y/N on the shoulder.

“Oh don’t worry. Joesph here is just going to have a nasty fall in the shower, aren’t you Joesph?” Y/N replied, fierce look on her face.

Erwin walked up the stairs and away from the sounds of pleading and Levi’s favorite form of discipline, pain.