#Only armed with the weather a memory and a little pep talk

[astraioskosmos]

Everytime Ms Kille comes around I always make a point to offer her Raveline Wine and I'm not sure if that's cruel of me or not

[giggly-squiggily]

Marks Of Progress (Black Clover)

Heyo! I'm home today! (Weather chaos), I felt a bit inspired as of late and decided to take a mini break from Candy Hearts to write about Asta and Luck! I need to do more Lee!Asta content, and here we are! I hope you like it!

CW: Scars, body insecurity

Summary: Asta's feeling a bit off regarding all his scars from battle. Thankfully he has someone like Luck to make him feel better.

Cloud 9 (Taglist peeps)

@duckymcdoorknob (Thank you for the inspiration, friend!)

“Asta! Asta Asta ASTA!” Luck all but bolted at him the minute he saw the shorter wizard, bouncing on his heels. “I’ve been looking for you! Come on- let’s fight!”

“Heh? But I just got back-” Asta barely had time to respond before Luck’s hand was on his wrist, pulling him with him towards the door. “At least let me shower first!”

“No way! You’ll only get sweaty all over again! It’ll be a waste!” Luck grinned over his shoulder at the other, pausing when his eyes landed on his arm. “Whoa- what’s that?”

Along Asta’s arm stood a brand new scar. Long and curved, it raced up the side of his arm from mid-forearm to elbow. The color indicated it wasn’t fresh, but there was no denying it was there to stay.

“Oh that?” Asta nodded at it. “Got it the other day during a mission. I forgot to duck, hehe.”

“Pfft! Why would you need to duck? You’re already so short!” Luck cackled at his joke, choking on it when he saw Asta’s face. “Eh…ehem. Sorry.”

“No, no you’re fine. It’s just…” Asta rubbed the back of his neck, eyes trained on his arm. Alongside his new one, faded scars lined his once smooth skin. Short ones, long ones, curved marks and fresh wounds. It wasn’t just his arms- he felt them all over. Memories of powerful enemies and near death experiences ached with each phantom pain. “Do you think it’s a bad thing? How scarred up I am?”

“Why would it be?” Luck asked, tilting his head in thought. His smile shrunk to a more curious one, brows furrowing as he took in the question. “I think scars are awesome! Well- the pain isn’t great. And healing can be a real pain in the butt…” Luck hummed, rocking on his heels. “But each one tells a story! When you’re the Wizard King, the kingdom will want to know about all of them!”

“You think so?” Asta looked up, starting to smile at Luck’s words. “You don’t think they’re…I don’t know…ugly?” Asta flushed at the word, hating how subconscious he suddenly felt.

Luck tsked, releasing his hand before shrugging off his Black Bull vest. Now derobed, he yanked up his shirt, baring his torso to the other. “Check me out! I got scars too!” He pointed at the one along his stomach. “That one’s from that one guy we fought- the one who sent me flying. Oh! And this one-” He pointed at his hip, gesturing to the curved burn creeping up from his waistline. “This is when me and Magna went into that super cool dungeon! I walked into a trap, hehe!”

“What about that one?” Asta pointed at the scar just beneath Luck’s belly button, a mark so faint you almost didn’t see it.

“That…I don’t remember.” Luck blinked, poking at it some. “I think I got knocked out- somebody probably harvested my organs. The point is-” Luck smiled at Asta as he let his shirt fall. “Our scars don’t make us ugly! They’re marks of progress! Little reminders of the progress we made in our journey to get stronger! Nothing about your marks are ugly, Asta. Remember that.”

Asta blinked, letting it all sink in. He didn’t expect to receive a pep talk today- from Luck of all people too! It made him feel all sorts of feelings- the biggest one was loved.

Giving him a wobbly smile, Asta nodded, not trusting his voice. “Thanks, Luck…”

“Hehe, no problem! Now that we’ve talked about mine, what about yours?” The blonde reached out, poking Asta’s upper arm. “I know you got one here from that battle with the witches! Oh, and this one!” He poked his shoulder. “That was when you were training with the Vermillion captain! How cool!”

“Ah! Luck, what are you do-ihihng?” Asta jerked with a giggle when Luck’s fingers poked down his back. “Stop it tihihihckles!”

“This one, and this one, oh, can’t forget about this one!” Luck danced around him, prodding at the back of his ribs and hips. “All reminders of how badass you are, Asta! What’s this one? Or this one?”

“L-Luhuhuhuck! Luhuuhuck, cohoohohme ohohohon!” Asta giggled helplessly, wrapping his arms around himself as the older Bull relentlessly tickled him. “I geheheheht it! Now stahhahahap!”

“But I’m not done! There’s one here- move your hands!” Luck laughed, abandoning all sense of oblivion as he grabbed Asta’s sides, worming his fingers against the fleshy parts. “I wanna see those battle scars!”

“Ah! Ahehahahhahaha! Luhuuhuuhck!” Asta cried, grabbing at his friend’s hands as he squirmed. “Nohohohohow yohohoohu’re just behehehehehing stuhuhuuhuhpid- Ahehahhhahah dohoohohohon’t!” Luck’s fingers charged, little tasered zaps further electrified his nerves, sending fresh waves of ticklishness up his body. “Yohohohohohou suhuhuhuhuuhck!”

“Aww, so mean! And after I made you feel better!” Luck giggled like a child, bouncing with Asta as he worked his hands up to his ribs, zapping him here and there to get those loud cackles and squeals from the swordsman. “You’re just like Magma! He calls me all sorts of things when I do this!” His eyes danced as he shot his hands up all the way to Asta’s armpits, buzzing the tips of his fingers there.

“AHEHAHHHAHA LUHUUHUUCK!” Asta all but shrieked, spasming so hard he fell backwards. Luck followed him down, saving him from a concussion with a leg slide. This also trapped Asta in his lap. Two for one! “COOHOHOOHME OHOHOHOOHOHN! DOHOOHOOHN’T TIHIIHIHIICKLE MEHEHHEHEHEHE!”

“Why not? It’s so fun!” Luck giggled, amused by the way Asta’s cheeks pinkened, his smile massive. He curled and squirmed like a bug, feet kicking and hands balled up into fists. And his laugh- loud and happy sounding! If Magma’s wasn’t hilarious to listen to, Luck would say this was his favorite sound yet. “You sound funny, hehehe!”

“LUHUHUHUUHUCK ENOHOOHOHOOUGH!” Asta wailed, the hairs on his arms starting to stand from how much charge he collected. Seeing this, Luck retreated his hands, letting Asta roll off his lap and into a ball on the floor. “Ehhee…eheehhehe…thahahahnk you.” Asta huffed, spreading out like a starfish.

“Aww, you’re welcome Astar!” Luck cooed. “If I knew you’d thank me for tickling you, I’d do it more often!”

“Thahahat’s not what I mehaant!” Asta glared some, the look lacking any real malice. “I meant…Thank you. For what you said about my scars. It helped.”

Luck nodded, smiling to himself. If you looked close enough, you could see the faintest blush touching his cheeks. “It’s just something a good friend always told me. SO!” Luck shot to his feet, bouncy energy returned. “Let’s go train! I wanna show you my new magic!”

“Okay okay.” Asta snorted, reaching out a hand. Luck took it-

ZZZZZZPT!

“AH WHAT THE HELL?” Yami roared from what sounded like the toilet as the entire base went dark. Muffled screams and yells could be heard around the space, Noelle’s shocked squeal and Finral’s cry of surprise. Upstairs, something thumped loudly, Magma cursing up a storm could be heard seconds later.

“LUCK!” A chorus of voices all yelled, making the blonde pale.

“Asta…” He turned to the smaller man.

“RUN!” Asta grabbed his hand, booking it to the exit. They broke out into the sunlight, laughing like children as the rest of the Bulls hollered after them.

Thanks for reading!

[novamirmirsblog]

Favourite crime pt 2

Natasha Romanoff x reader

Word Count: 2936

Genre: angsty fluff? or fluffy angst 👀

Request: yes

Warnings: swearing, mentions of cheating, slight coercion into sex (it doesn't happen tho)

Part 1 is here

A/n: The long awaited part two is officially here. I had lots of people who wanted the reader to move on, people who wanted them to get back together and people who wanted both. Thank you everyone for your INDECISIVENESS (kidding. ily). Also Emma was a randomly generated name - I'm sorry :3

Did I write this fic instead of sleeping? Yes. I have no regrets.

It had been a year since you moved back home. The seasons had come and gone and with that, so had your thoughts of Natasha. The same could not be said for the assassin. She had spent a blissful 3 months with Bruce before he had dropped off the face of the Earth and she was missing you. By the 5th month, she had stopped moping about and tried to find you. She searched everywhere but your town was large and unfamiliar and you didn’t want to be found.

Natasha both regretted what she had said and didn't. She regretted it because she realised just how much she adored you once she saw all the areas Bruce fell short in. You knew her better than she sometimes knew herself. You knew when to back off and when to put pressure on. You knew when she needed control and when you needed to take control. You knew when she wanted ice cream or when she wanted brownies. Bruce didn't. However, a part of her didn't regret those nasty things she said because she really didn't deserve you. You were everything she wasn’t, and she didn't know how to measure up to you.

She never voiced these concerns and so they festered and grew until she believed the only way out was to cheat. She knew that was the only thing that could drive you away. Natasha had told you all about her past, how she believed the Red Room had stripped her of her humanity – of her choice whether to become a mother. She knew there were other ways to have children - of course there were, but she hated the fact they had taken that option from her.

You were not like Natasha. You voiced your concerns which is why she knew exactly what to say and do to get you to hate her. Your previous boyfriend had cheated on you with your once best friend. You had watched as your father cheated on your mother and how that made her a hollow shell for a while, her never understanding why the man she loved could hurt her in that way. Supposedly, everyone models their future relationships on what their parents’ relationship looked like. Perhaps that’s why you kept choosing the cheaters. You were content with where you were. You had a forest, a busy town, and a beach all within a 15-mile radius of your house. You were far enough from civilisation that you could forget about reality for a while but close enough to occasionally dip back in whenever you wanted to.

You had kept in contact with Tony and Pepper, congratulating them on the arrival of Morgan and insisting that they should visit. You also continued to occasionally talk to Wanda when Carol was off world. Carol was overjoyed when she found out you had started dating someone new.

You had met Emma when you were taking a dip back into reality at the local supermarket. Her blonde hair vaguely reminded you of a woman you used to know, and you guessed that’s why you felt drawn to her. It wasn’t the electrical crackle that stole your breath away like your first meeting with Natasha, but it was something. Emma could occasionally be a little controlling, but you guessed that’s what normal relationships were like. She didn’t like you going to bars or pubs anymore and you certainly weren’t allowed in any clubs. You didn’t mind it too much as you hardly minded giving up a few nights out if it meant you could have something that resembled normalcy.

“Who’s that?” Emma asked, your face illuminated from your phone as the ding rang out.

“A friend. He’s bringing his wife and new baby over tomorrow and was reminding me to baby-proof the house.” You smiled lightly as you texted Tony back. You hadn’t mentioned to Emma that you were an ex-avenger, but it just kept slipping your mind.

“Why didn’t you tell me? Who is he? Where will he be staying?”

“I just forgot. Sorry. He’ll be staying here.”

“But you only have a single bed.”

“Yeah. I was planning to sleep on that and Tony, Pepper and the baby can stay in my room.”

“You mean our room.”

You said nothing, too engrossed in arguing with Tony about how under no circumstances will there be any celery in your house. Apparently, that was the wrong thing to do.

“Our room, right Y/n?”

“Um yeah.” You wave her off was apparently your second mistake, but you didn’t multi-task too well and so half answers were all you were good for while texting.

“I have been your girlfriend for 3 months Y/n. The least you could do is answer me properly and tell me what’s going on in your life.” She huffed, pushing your feet from her lap, and turning to face away from you, all of which you missed. You really weren’t having that evil green vegetable in your house.

“Seriously, what is even so important that you’re ignoring me right now!” Emma’s voice cut through the fog, and you looked at her with a blank expression. It was times like these that you really missed Na- No. You refused to go there. You didn’t miss her. You were over her.

“No celery.”

Emma threw her hands up in the air. “You seriously don’t see what’s wrong, do you?”

“No.” You tilted your head, confused at what your girlfriend was talking about.

“Well, I’m not just going to tell you! Jesus. You should know. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Emma stood up in a huff, making a lot of noise while getting ready to leave.

“Okay – bye” Your attention was bought back to the phone when Tony sent you a cute video of Morgan crawling about, probably as a bribe to get you to buy celery. You stood, watching the video a few times before you shut off your phone, finally getting around to babyproofing your house.

~~~~~

Babyproofing a house was a lot more work than you originally thought. You had spent most the night picking sharp objects up from baby-height areas and making sure you hadn’t left any weapons about. All the guns taped under tables had to be relocated and you found enough change to set you up for retirement. You just hoped and prayed there were no small beads for Morgan to choke on. You didn’t even get around to putting soft corners on the edges of tables and counter tops, but you told yourself that it was survival of the fittest at that point. The whole endeavour had taken most the night which is how you found yourself with only an hour till Tony, Pepper and Morgan arrived.

There was a knock on the door, and you saw that you were 15 minutes late. Luckily your girlfriend had arrived half an hour before so you figured she could let them in. You shouted down, telling her to get the door as you finished putting on your socks.

“Hiya baby!” You cooed at Morgan babbling in Pepper’s arms, watching as her chubby hands reached for your hair, grabbing on with a crazy amount of strength. “Oh my god you’re strong. Pep, are you sure she’s Tony’s? I’m pretty sure she’s as strong as Thor.” You laughed, looking over at Tony. Your face dropped into careful neutrality as you saw the redhead standing behind him.

“Of course she’s mine doofus. We had multiple paternity tests.” Tony winked.

You didn’t know what to do. You weren’t ready. Your throat went dry as you asked if anyone wanted any drinks, your girlfriend waving them into the living room. You prepared the drinks, and you felt a presence behind you, wrapping their arms around your waist, their head resting on your back. You hated it. You felt suffocated. You took a breath and handed half the drinks to Emma, opting to grab a wine glass and fill it with the wine you had been saving for a special occasion. It might not have been a special occasion, but you needed something strong to get though the next few hours and you knew this would do the job.

You made your way back into the living room and Tony gestured to Emma “I don’t think we’ve met yet.”

“I’m Emma.”

“Tony. This is Pepper, Morgan and Natasha.” Your heart dropped at the mention of her name, realising that she wasn’t some cruel hallucination but was in fact standing in your living room.

“Sorry. I forgot to introduce you all.” You smiled and took another large swig from your glass.

“Hey how come you’re the only one with alcohol?”

“Because you’re a parent now.” You rolled your eyes at Tony, feeling Natasha stare holes into your face.

“So I need it even more!” Pepper hit Tony as he said that, causing Morgan to laugh.

“Don’t worry about Y/n getting drunk, she can handle her alcohol pretty well.”

“We know.” Natasha finally spoke. Her voice bought back floods of memories and you realised you missed her voice – just the tiniest amount. “Who exactly are you to Y/n?” To anyone else, the question was flippant, like asking about the weather but you, Tony and Pepper could all hear the carefully laced venom within her words and while the question sounded like it was aimed at your girlfriend, you could tell she was speaking to you.

“Where’s Bruce this fine day?” You shot back, not letting Emma speak.

“My question first.” Natasha finally turned her gaze to focus on you.

“Why are you here?” You felt Emma’s arm slither possessively around your waist. Perhaps if it had been another day, you would have appreciated it but right now, you felt like you were drowning. She held you too tight, you couldn’t move.

“Ah.” Natasha wore a smug look on her face and yet her eyes flashed with hurt. You hated that she had found out information you weren’t willing to give.

“Why are you here Agent Romanoff.” You wanted- no needed her to answer you. You needed to know why she came to you. Then you looked at Tony. “Why would you bring her here?” Your voice was level, Morgan was pulling at your leg to get you to pick her up. You used that as an excuse to escape your girlfriend’s grip.

“We need you back.”

“So you bring your baby to try and bribe me back?” You ran a hand through your hair, lightly bouncing Morgan. “That I can understand but why bring her?” You waved at Natasha, feeling both her and Emma’s eyes bore into you.

“She’s part of the team too and you both need to get on.” Pepper said.

“You were in on this too?” Your throat felt tight. You couldn’t breathe properly.

“I’m sorry but who exactly are you?” Emma asked. Natasha scoffed at her, folding her arms, and rolling her eyes.

Everything was a little too loud and muffled. It felt as if you were underwater. The sun was too bright, and it made everything a little too hard to look at. You could see your furniture, but it wouldn’t stay in your brain long enough for you to fully register it. You placed Morgan on the sofa and took a deep breath, closing your eyes to focus. When you opened them again you looked straight at Natasha.

“I am not going to play nice with you. You broke me and now that I’m moving on you suddenly decide to show up? No. I don’t believe it. Why can’t you just let me be happy? Leave me alone. Besides, I thought I was a ‘fun little distraction’.” You spat at Natasha. You were tired of being the bigger person. She had hurt you and you wanted to watch her bleed. It’s why you leant over and kissed Emma harshly, why you let out a slight moan so Natasha could hear. It didn’t matter that it was completely fake because even though you knew you should feel satisfaction at Natasha’s hurt face, the twinge of sadness upset you more than you would have liked.

Natasha knew the kiss was forced. She knew it was, but it didn’t stop the knife digging deeper into her heart. You had moved on and she had to respect that. She had said some awful things to you, and you really did deserve someone much better than her. You stormed out of the house, saying that you were going for a walk, leaving your girlfriend to entertain your guests.

~~~~~

It was dark by the time you got back. You saw Natasha on the sofa and ignored her as you walked straight to the guest bedroom. All you wanted to do was curl up and sleep this horrible day into the past but unfortunately for you, you had a girlfriend sitting on the bed.

“This bed isn’t big enough for-” Emma cut you off with a rough kiss. “Emma not now-”

“Yes now. I want to remind your ex what she’s missing.” Emma went back to kissing you and you wanted to cry. You didn’t like her possessiveness, didn’t like her jealousy. With Natasha that had been fun but with Emma, it made you feel afraid.

“Emma seriously.” You grabbed her wrist, not letting her reach into your underwear.

Emma huffed and stepped back. “What’s your problem?”

“I’m really tired. Can’t we just sleep?”

“It’s your ex, isn’t it? Why is she even here? I can’t believe you were going to just let her stay here and not tell me!”

“I didn’t know she was coming!” You were both stage whispering, conscious of the fact there was a baby that most likely didn’t sleep all that often.

“Then kick her out!”

You said nothing. You couldn’t just kick her out. That wouldn’t be fair.

“Oh my god you still love her. You still love her and she’s in love with someone else. Or she was. Ha.” Emma let out a bark of laughter. “That’s so fucking rich. You know what, crawl back to her but don’t come crying to me when she fucks you over again do you hear me?”

“Emma that’s not- I don’t love her anymore. I hate her. She ruined my life.”

“You truly hate her?” You nodded at her. “Supposedly, you can only truly hate someone if you loved them first. We’re done Y/n”

“Seriously?! What? Because I used to love Natasha? Because I don’t want to have sex with you? Grow up Emma. I’ve loved people before you and at this rate, I’ll love people after you too. I’m tired. I don’t have to have sex with you. You can’t make me.”

“I’m your girlfriend! You’re supposed to want to have sex with me!”

“Well not when I’ve had a long ass day!”

“Guys, I think you might wake Morgan.” You winced a little at the addition of Natasha. You knew this was going to end badly.

“This is my fucking house!” Emma said, not lowering her tone.

“Actually, it’s Y/n’s.” Natasha calmly stated. She really wasn’t going to rise to the bait.

Your girl- sorry- ex-girlfriend, fumed next to you. “You know what? Have her. She’s so screwed over from whatever you pulled that I don’t think she can love anyone ever again anyway.” Emma seethed, grabbing her shoes, and slamming the door on the way out. The sound of baby Morgan crying echoed through the house.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine.” You ran your hand over your face, the exhaustion of the whole day catching up with you.

“No, it’s not. I betrayed your trust over the one thing I knew you couldn’t tolerate. I knew how hurtful cheating is to you and I did it anyway. I know it’s not an excuse, but I guess I just felt like you deserved someone more than me. Someone better.”

You said nothing. You were so so tired. You missed her and it ached, but you couldn’t forget what she had done. “I can’t trust you anymore.”

“I know but please let me try again. Bruce wasn’t worth it. He only made me realise how much I love you.” Tears were filling up Natasha’s beautiful eyes and you could see just how tired she looked.

“I missed you.” You whispered out, not wanting to break whatever was being formed

“I missed you too. So so much.”

“I can’t forgive you. Not yet, but…you can have one more chance Natasha. That’s it. You get one chance at my forgiveness.”

“Okay!” Natasha sniffled slightly “I promise I won’t mess this up.”

“I’m serious Natasha. One chance. I don’t play baseball. There are no three strikes.”

Natasha gingerly reached up to cup your face. “I won’t waste this.”

“Good because I never really stopped loving you and I’d hate to be a simp.”

“I think it’s a little too late for that dove.” Natasha let out a watery laugh.

“Excuse me?” You let out a fake gasp and wiped some of the tears from her cheeks.

“It’s okay, I’ll tell you a secret.” Natasha ushered you to lean closer and you did, she tucked a strand of hair behind your ear and whispered, “I’ve been whipped for you for as long as I can remember.”

You were looking forward to all the ways Natasha was going to make it up to you and hopefully, you’d get to give Bruce a good punch too. You both knew it was going to be a long road ahead but you both felt a little more ready for what lies next.

[levi-ish]

Little Talks | 5

Pairing: Bartender!Levi X Reader

Genre: [+18] Slice of life, drama, romance, fluff, smut

Words: 3k

Warnings: Alcohol, cheating mentions, drugs, cussing

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

Masterlist

“Your taste in tea is shit” Levi scanned through the old teabags you had lingering in your cabinets.

“Sorry if I don’t have enough money to buy those fancy blends you like” you rolled your eyes as you leaned further into the throw pillows you had on top of your old couch.

“Tch.”

You turned around and watched the man tumble around with your mugs and you knew that he hated your unmatching sets, always making small comments about them. He then set for the most common ones you had and brought them to you after quickly making your drinks.

It had been a few weeks since the night when Levi comforted you after your ex-beloved’s visit. You two held hands and pretended that it was nothing while watching random cooking shows, then after you fell asleep he left but not before making you another cup of tea that you woke up to find inside your microwave, sitting there waiting for you.

You thanked him in person two days after and exchanged numbers because he claimed that he didn’t ‘trust’ your building’s security. Even when you told him that Zeke only got up because your concierge knew him.

But now things were better than you could expect. Levi would drive you home almost every night and wait for your ‘ok’ text when you took the elevator, to be sure you were safe and sound. He mostly made you tea at 4AM when the bar was closing and you had no classes the day after, and you two hung around at your apartment quite a lot, watching shitty movies and listening to him complain about how you were doing your laundry all wrong.

Whoever saw you two together would think you were a couple of elderlies married.

“I can’t believe he didn’t like how she plated it” you pointed at the TV, quite angry at the cooking show passing on. “She even put those fancy herbs.”

“It’s shit”

“Everything is ‘shit’ to you” you rolled your eyes.

“Only the things that are shit” Levi replied as he sipped on his tea.

You rolled eyes once more as you felt the shift on the sofa, not noticing his movements if it weren’t for it. Levi held his phone to his eyes and a sheer of light illuminated his strong features, highlighting that glorious jawline and the thin lips you—

What?

Shaking your head, you quickly got rid of those thoughts, adjusting your own position and making your back fall more comfortably on the cushions. Levi let a small sigh and brought the teacup back to his mouth, drinking slowly.

“Hange again?” You asked, giving him the side of your eye as you stirred your own drink.

“Kirstein this time” Levi replied, letting out his signature ‘tch’. “I should’ve been there. Those idiots can’t do their jobs properly without supervision.”

“Hange forcing people to listen to their theories again?”

“No. Jean broke the sink and is trying to blame it on the weather somehow.”

“How…”

“No fucking idea.” Levi put his phone back inside his pocket and drank the last of his tea, sighing after. It was a heavenly vision to see, you weren’t gonna lie.

With a small yawn, you stretched your legs and downed the tea in one gulp, earning a side eye from the man who wasn’t pleased you were appreciating one of his fancy blends. The minty taste lingered on your tongue as you licked your lips, and you could smell the hint of cinnamon wandering in the room, mixing with Levi’s cologne that you so much adored.

“I’m bored” you let out, pouting as you rested your face on the pillow closer to his shoulder.

“You wouldn’t be if you stayed quiet and watched the show.”

“Do you hate me or what” you scoffed, pouting even more.

Levi turned to you, watching your expression and that’s when you noticed how close you were to him. His breath fanned over your face and you swore you could see his lips twitching and him inching closer, clearing your throat, you looked down, completely breaking eye contact.

“Do you really wanna know?” He replied and you pushed him. “At least clean your hands before touching me.”

“You wish I was touching you” you bit your lip and rose your brows teasingly.

He turned to your face once more, eyes dead serious focusing on you and he licked his lips slowly, posture completely changing.

“Maybe.”

He caught you off guard with that comment, making a small shiver go down your spine, but you decided that brushing it off would be better than acknowledging new reasons to make the relationship you two had more uncomfortable. You knew Levi wasn’t very pushy about things and probably would forget about it as soon as you would, without giving it another thought.

Oh well.

“Uh…” you tried to say, licking your lips again after your mouth went full dry “… are you hungry?”

“No” he said, eyes still on you as you tried to get his attention away from you.

“Uhm… then do you wanna do something else or…?”

Levi inched closer now, his nose brushing against yours and breath warming your chin as you rubbed skin together, feeling each other scents and every little movement was big enough to make both bodies swarm under the tension in the room.

“Levi… what…”

But before you could continue, he closed the distance, lips colliding as you felt the dry specs of his chapped skin brushing against yours. Is this really happening? What…? It was, and he was still going, hand now holding your nape to have your face closer to his than before, as if he never wanted to let go. You turned to the side to allow his tongue inside, feeling it dancing with yours in a difficult and shy but intense tango that seemed too familiar but strange at the same time.

It was a sensation you never wanted to end.

But as soon as it started, it stopped; his hand left your neck and went back to his side, and his usually unfazed look now seemed more panicked, as if he was already regretting it.

Please, god, don’t regret it. Please…

“I—”

You were abruptly cut off by him standing from the couch and grabbing his coat by the rack, quickly opening the door and leaving your apartment, leaving you by yourself and with empty lips but a full heart that felt too heavy for your shallow chest.

Things changed since that.

Levi completely disappeared. Hange and Jean would say that he would leave the key to them and only showed up in the mornings to rearrange things the way he liked them but left very quickly each time. He didn’t text and you didn’t try to, knowing it would be useless since we are talking about him, most emotionally unavailable person to exist. You still went to the bar every night, trying to catch him around and maybe clear things up, but failed miserably.

You didn’t regret it, not at all. In fact, you wished it would last longer, even though it was enough material for your mind to wander around the floor full of eggshells that were your memories from that night. You wanted more, you wanted him, and now you weren’t ashamed of admitting it to yourself.

And you were almost giving up seeing him again, if it weren’t for Sasha, who was livid over how he had reacted and insisted on dragging you back to the bar.

So there you were, Mikasa holding one of your arms and Sasha holding the other, both giving you pep talks on how you should go there and confront him. You knew he was working tonight for sure, that’s because Mikasa told you she’d texted him about it before and learned he was taking some weird shifts and closing on weirder times. Annie was busy with her two-year anniversary with Armin, so she couldn’t come, but she did text you to be brave. The way Annie would, I mean, sending a small “punch him” and a smiley face.

“C’mon (y/n), you look hot and he will regret leaving when you show up” Sasha’s grip on your arm tightened as she tried to drag you inside. “Tell her, Mikasa”

“You look hot” the other woman said, and you knew that she wasn’t putting much effort in because it made you uncomfortable, otherwise you’d have been inside already since Mikasa was stronger than you two combined. ���Levi’s an idiot.”

“I don’t wanna go” you said, whining as they let go of you for a moment. “He did what he did and I was pretty much rejected. I don’t wanna push harder.”

“What’s even his problem?!” Sasha crossed her arms, her expression turning into a mad one. “Was he always an idiot, Mikasa?”

“He changed a lot since he was left at the altar.”

“What” you and Sasha said in unison, shocked by the new piece of information.

“Did I never mention it?”

“No?” You frowned, coming closer to her face. “What do you mean by ‘left at the altar’?”

“Exactly that.”

“Mikasa” Sasha pushed her lightly.

“I don’t know exactly, I was 15, but he was getting married to this girl and she left him the day of the wedding.” Mikasa said as if it was nothing. “Everyone was there to see, and he was devastated.”

That left you wondering… a lot. Why’d Levi never tell you about that? You two went into some deep discussions at times, talking about stuff that you never dared to share with others, and he did open up a little about some of his things, but this? You thought that would be something to tell someone you would think of kissing. Unless he wasn’t really thinking those things about you, then it would be a whole other topic that you were too much of a coward to consider.

Did anyone else know? You had so many questions and you really wish you had the answers because of the anxiety now growing in the pit of your stomach.

“You didn’t think that was important information to share?” You questioned and Mikasa shook her head.

“Not really.”

“Okay, we are getting in. You can deal with that later” Sasha pushed you through the door and now you couldn’t say anything else because your feet already touched the wooden floor.

It was a full house, everyone was dancing and singing along with the old jukebox and there were girls leaning on the counter flirting with Jean as your eyes wandered. Hange was mixing drinks and Levi was nowhere to see, what made you feel a lot more comfortable being there. Sasha and Mikasa pushed through the crowd and found you a place on the counter, sitting on stools and leaving you to sit in between them, so you did, and the blonde bartender was the first one to notice you there.

“Ah!” He chirped loudly, leaving the girls behind to come to you. “My favorite girl… and company, hi, hello.”

You noticed he was now flirting with Mikasa, but she just ignored his presence.

“Hot wings!” Sasha punched the counter and grabbed you by side shoulder, pointing at the shelves. “And shots, keep them coming, my friend here needs them.”

“I’m sure she does” Jean kept his gaze on Mikasa, trying to be subtle about it as you rolled your eyes at him. “Our short friend has been pretty hard to deal with lately, so without you around I already knew something went down.”

“They kissed” Mikasa let out.

“ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT LEVI?” Screamed Hange from where they were, coming right away and pushing Jean with their hip. “Also, hi, but answer me!”

“They kissed” Mikasa repeated, and you gave up on trying to stop them.

Hange’s hand fell on your shoulder as they approached the group further, inserting the ponytail-head in the middle and readjusting the glasses above their nose, “You and shorty? Are you kidding me?! Tell me everything!”

“I’ll leave you to deal with Hange now” Jean said as they leaned a little more into Mikasa’s side. “So… are you in college?”

She only gave him a side glance and ignored his question, making the man confused.

“Focus!” Hange slammed their fist, now sitting on your side. “You have to tell me about it!”

“Oh gosh, please let me breath!” You rose your hands and they all moved their attention to you, making you feel a little overwhelmed and guilty — they were simply curious creatures. A deep sigh left your mouth as you put your palms back on the wooden surface of the table, opening your eyes slowly. “We kissed… and he left.”

“Without saying anything?” Jean asked and you nodded. “Damn… he ghosted you.”

“He might just be too busy?” Hange suggested and you gave them the harsh glare. “Maybe not?”

“Can anyone bring me—us some wings?” Sasha pleaded, leaning onto the table.

“You two need to talk” Hange added, bumping onto you jokingly. “Kiss and make up.”

“That’s not happening.”

“C’mon, he’s in the back. I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you.”

You just lowered your head and that was enough for them to understand.

“Well, I’ll leave you be” they just gave you a slight nod and stood from the booth. “Good luck.”

You felt some warmth crawl into your belly and smiled at them, following by another glance onto the other two in front of you.

“Mikasa is such an exotic name, where did it come from?” Jean leaned further, trying his best to sound smooth but the girl’s reaction was too bothered to be working.

“We’ll leave you be” Hange said as they grabbed Jean by the nape and dragged him back to the bar.

[…]

Sasha was on her third plate of hot wings when caught the first glance of Levi.

He came from the back for a moment to grab the electric kettle from under the counter, turning around quickly as if he already knew you were around and was avoiding any type of contact. Being treated like a disease like that made you feel angry, it wasn’t like you’d done anything wrong, you just kissed him back — he was the one to initiate it! The nerve of him.

You gulped down the rest of your beer and threw yourself back on the cushions of the booth, earning a look from Mikasa, but she decided to ignore it knowing you were procrastinating the inevitable, now focusing on Sasha who was unbuttoning her pants to eat more.

“Hey, you’re (y/n), right?” Someone approached your table, hands filling the pockets of their letterman jacket and blonde hair neatly sitting on top of his head. A thin goatee painted his chin and a gentle look sat around his clear eyes.

“Yea” you shook your head, looking at his face, frowning slightly. “Sorry, I—”

“It’s fine, we have Latin together” you now recognized him as the boy who sat in front of you and occasionally borrowed a pen.

“Oh! Reiner, right? You want some hot wings?” Sasha was not pleased you offered, but you just ignored her growl.

“No, I’m fine, just came to say ‘hi’” he gave you a small smile. “See you around.”

You reciprocated the smile and watched as he left, and your eyes collided with cold, grey ones across the room, behind the wooden counter as you felt your heart rush again, as if it was the first time once more. Levi had his muscular arms crossed as he stared right into your soul, making cold chills run all over your spine, holding your body to make it stop.

He turned around to leave and as if a lightning had just struck in you, your body involuntarily stood from its place and rushed to the counter, running around it and pushing the backdoor open, revealing an annoyed short man holding a cup of tea.

“What the f—”

And before he could even complete his thoughts, you grabbed the cup and placed it on the table right next to you, all that before pining him roughly against the wall, staring quickly into his eyes, searching for the same flame you could see inside you now burning around grey specs. A small smile grew on your lips and you kissed him hard.

He hesitated though, leaning back quickly as if something had snapped in his mind, making him realize what was really happening there. But before you could react again, he turned you around, pining your hands above your head as he kissed you feverously, the other hand feeling the skin of your hips from under your shirt, making the chills go harder around your bloodstream.

Levi moved positions once more, taking the back of your thighs and sitting you on top of the same table, making the teacup fall to the floor, but he seemed unbothered by it. His tongue now made advances on your mouth, playing with yours in soft movements even when his own lips made harsh movements, combining everything like sugar and cinnamon, and the pine scent of his cologne invaded your clothes that were now too hot for your needy skin.

His hands clenched around the fat of your legs, holding it as if his life depended on it and he started to lower his lips to your neck, giving it open-mouthed kisses that made a small moan fall from your throat. Ashamed, you didn’t realize that your grip on his shoulders was a little too hard and he put a hand from under your chin, holding your face as he stared deeply into your soul. A satisfied scoff fell from his own plump lips and he came back to what he was doing.

That was somewhat a dream, something you had fantasized about too many times to count, and now that it was happening, you refused to pinch yourself in fear of waking up alone. But when his slim fingers rose your skirt to your hips, things felt too real for it to be just your mind playing tricks. Small whimpers escaped your mouth as Levi decided to explore around your navel, playing softly with the hem of the lacy panties you were wearing, and you thanked whatever god was up there for not wearing those comfortable ones you almost wore tonight.

He removed your panties and lowered himself now, a small breath fanned over your naked parts, making you shiver slightly, only to be held still by his own hands. He gave you a small glance before you nodded in consent, and it was all it took for him to devour you in the most amazing ways you had never experienced before.

Levi had experience — you could tell — and the passion he exhaled was enough for you to moan without caring about anything in the world. His fingers joined his tongue and played with your entrance, teasing slowly as his mouth did wonders around your sensitive bud, movements going from harsh hands to slow kisses that left you whimpering, needing everything, anything more from him, legs hooping around his shoulders while trying to make him come closer to your heat.

You whimpered, moaned, cried under his spell, and everything felt 1000x more sensitive against his touch. His fingers entered you and played around all the right places, hitting every beat to the song that played muffled inside the bar, making a small giggle fall from you and he noticed it, now fastening his pace as if he wanted to go back to shutting you up with his own mouth.

Repeatedly he hit your most sensitive spot, licking, and tasting all he could as he did his best to make you cum. It didn’t take long for you to feel the heat pooling around your stomach, throwing your head backwards and fisting his hair between your fingers as you felt his rush against your orgasm, taking everything from you simply with his mouth. You moaned loudly as you rode his face quickly, hips moving without your consent and he pulled your lips apart to clean the remnants of your pleasure, not leaving one spot untouched.

Your chest heaved from the rush as your eyes made contact with grey seas that now leveled with your height, watching you under spells of lust while he sucked slowly from his fingers, tasting every last bit of you, like you were mead for his tastebuds, and you could swear you saw his lips curl a little upwards.

“You surely know how to make a mess” he noted, a ‘tch’ leaving his mouth.

TAGLIST

@zeickv @thirstyforsometea​ @nalu-trashytrash​ @umheyasf​​

[papipopsicle]

AFTERTASTE PART SIX

Pairing: Archie Andrews X Short!Reader

Genre: fluff and some angst

Summary: In which two best friends since childhood test whether sex and friendship can co-exist without causing conflict. Including OC's Flick and Cherry, a bisexual and lesbian in a sapphic relationship who are best friends of Y/N.

Song: Wildflower by 5 Seconds of Summer

Warnings: a high probability for swearing

Words: 1.7K

MASTERLIST

feedback is always appreciated

     "LEONARDO, MICHELANGELO!" An eleven year old Y/N Robins called from her porch door, impatiently tapping a food bowl against the wooden frame she leant against. Behind her, the sun was setting and painted the sky a gorgeous array of pinks and oranges, sweeping together like watercolours. She looked out on the street impatiently, finding its sleeping state both calming and unnerving. Elm Street was never noisy, but after three years of living there, the girl had realised it wasn't a place of silence either.

And she was completely right. A distant, yet soft, meow grew ever closer, finally appearing around the side of a bush. Y/N grinned, affectionately calling out for the birman to go find his dinner, "C'mere Angelo, that's it boy!"

He trotted past her up into the house where his found his dinner waiting.

"Leo!" Her small voice called out as loud as it could into the cool evening air. He had wandered off earlier that same day to enjoy the Riverdale summer heat elsewhere, and the Robins family didn't think anything of it. Just as her mouth opened to call out the name again, Vegas came barrelling out from the door of the Andrews household, across the street to her side with Mary and Archie following.

The Andrews matriarch noticed the empty food bowl, "Is everything alright, Y/N/N?" She asked in her usual professional voice, but the girl knew from experience how much love and warmth it really held. Elodie told her about Leonardo's disappearance and how it wasn't uncommon in this kind of weather, but he could be getting a bit hungry.

Mary handed the dog leash to her son and sent him a secret wink, "Why don't you two walk Vegas together and see if you can find him?"

Excitement had been bubbling through the small town of Riverdale for weeks now anticipating the big Fourth of July celebrations ahead of them. Y/N Robins had planned on keeping up with her old tradition of sleeping in until late afternoon, then rolling out of bed in time to catch the fireworks with her friends. But with with the drunkenly asking Archie to be her boyfriend, which was not something she remembered a few hours later, her plans for this year were flipped on their head. So she found herself getting dressed to go talk things out with her supposedly best friend in a quiet spot next to sweet water river.

With her hair half tied up, and a black denim jacket over her shoulders, Y/N left through the door in her bedroom, and waited on the edge of the pavement until she heard a door across the street open and quietly shut. Any butterflies fluttering in her stomach all but disappeared as Archie turned around and smiled into the early morning sun towards her. It had been three days since they had last seen each other, since the girl confessed she didn't really know what she wanted in the space between them.

He jogged over road, asphalt kicking up under his new Nike trainers, and immediately engulfed Y/N's small frame into his own. The two teenagers walked all the way to the edge of Sweetwater River in the silvery silence of early birds and rustling leaves, their hands every now and again grazing each other and lacing together.

"So," The Andrews boy sighed as he lay against the warm grass, watching as she sat next to him and propped her head up on his chest, "what's going on in that head of yours?"

"Leo!" Y/N's melodic voice rang out across the long stretch of stream. Crystal clear water you could see the smoothness of the rocks which lay underneath if you peaked your head over the bank enough. For some unknown reason, the young cat would always find his way towards some kind of water, even back in Phoenix.

"Hello?" Archie bopped the girl on the tip of her nose as she returned back to reality, evidently not hearing what he'd just asked by the puzzled look her face adorned.

She hummed and gave him her full attention, allowing him to rephrase his previous words. In the back of her mind, Y/N knew exactly what she wanted- to leave high school and go on endless adventures with the boy her head lay upon. She wanted an easy life, away from the eerie little town she called home- to decorate her own house with pictures of smiles and candid memories. But most of all, in that perfect moment, she wanted herself to let go and fall in love with her childhood best friend.

After finding Prince Charming and finding out he was really the one from Shrek and not Cinderella, her faith in true love was shaken at the age of sixteen.

"I'm scared of you hurting me, or doing anything that could possibly hurt you, Arch." Y/N's voice faltered at her blunt honesty, "I meant everything I said, but I don't think I'm over what happened with Chuck last year."

"Tiger," Archie interrupted her thoughts, sitting up slightly leaning back on one hand and using the other to cup her face, "I can't promise we won't ever hurt each other even just a little bit, but whatever happens, we'll learn and grown from it together. I don't think I'll ever fully understand how much that bastard hurt you. But, nothing in this world that's worth having comes easy, life is scary and I'll go through all of the shitty parts twenty three hours a day, if it means I get just one with you smiling up at me."

Half an hour of roaming up and down the river bank had passed before a twisting, nauseous feeling took over the pit of Y/N's stomach. She and her family adored their two fluffy boys, her dad would never admit it but they all heard the little 'goodnights' he'd whisper as he made his way up to bed finally. Though with her parents still working, and Y/S/N desperately needing to finish an assignment due tomorrow, the youngest Robins was the only one able to attend this search and rescue mission.

"What if he's -"

Vegas rubbed his nose against her shin in comfort.

"Y/N/N," A twelve year old Archie cut her off in his usual caring voice, "don't even let your mind go there. He's a little ninja cat he's probably off catching frogs or something."

He grabbed her hand, squeezing it in comfort and heading towards an unexplored area of the forest line. Truth be told, he was meant to be doing English homework with Betty Cooper right about now, but that had slipped his mind as soon as Y/N Robins adorably wonky smile found him across the road.

"Leo!" Y/N's sweet voice called out.

"Leonardo?" Archie followed with Vegas by his side.

"That's the sweetest thing I think I've ever heard." The girl admitted shyly, hiding her rose dusted cheeks by bringing Archie into a tight hug, her head resting in the crook of his neck while her long y/h/c hair tickled his face. It smelt of strawberries and mint in the morning breeze.

"Y/N/N, can I ask you something?" His voice sounded nervous, but as she looked up and nodded, his face held a smirk, "Will you stay my girlfriend?"

She answered with a small kiss, staring into his eyes innocently as her fingers traced his back under his thin t-shirt, about to lift the material from his body. But life had a funny way of throwing challenges their way, making them run before they could walk.

"I think I see him!" Archie handed the leash to his best friend, seeing a patch of grey in between the auburn autumn leaves. Vegas barked and tried to follow after his human, but Y/N managed to stop the Labrador from bounding away by distracting him with ear rubs. Wild growls and hisses could be heard as Archie wrestled the feisty long haired cat into his hoodie clad arms. Then Leonardo hissed so madly, the young boy almost dropped him, "Yep, definitely Leo."

Y/N ran over as fast as she could, dropping the lead as soon as she saw his pumpkin eyes and bare teeth, clearly not a fan of Archie. She grinned widely with glee and got to her tippy toes to kiss Archie's cheek. "You're a life saver!"

As soon as the fluffy animal felt Y/N's little hands rubbing his chin as she took him from the boy's arms, he switched into a completely different cat and started purring.

A gunshot sounded through the open clearing, and before a high pitched scream could escape from Y/N's mouth, Archie saw the terror in her eyes and pulled the petite girl behind him. He scaled the area, unable to see anything but birds fleeing from the unusual noise.

"We need to get out of here." The boy's gravely voice whispered with urgency, picking her up without hesitation and running until his lungs burnt and his trainers once again hit the comfort of tarmac.

"What the fuck was that?" Y/N screeched, her inquisitiveness telling to turn back, but thankfully common sense won that battle. She and Archie found themselves back on the pavement of Elm Street before they knew it.

"Y/N, we didn't see anything, it could've been a car backfiring a street away for all we know." Archie tried to rationalise, but in all honesty he was stuck to his core with dread.

"Right, or someone was just murdered and we could've been next on some psychopaths hit list." Y/N's dark mind shone through as she blurted out her inner monologue. The boy didn't have any words of wisdom, instead he lead her to his front door and brought her into his body. They stayed in their own little world for what could have been hours, thankful they had each other and not allowing themselves to think about what secrets Riverdale was really hiding under it's pretty exterior.

Nothing ever happened in the town with 'pep'.

Betty Cooper awoke early that Saturday morning, ready to get any assignments out of the way to enjoy the weekend ahead. She opened her curtains and tied her hair up into a ponytail, but as she looked out of her window at the beautiful blue skies, she watched in shock at the surprising scene unfolding in front of her. Y/N Robins up on her tippy toes, with Archie Andrews' hands wrapped around her waist as they kissed intensely in what the two thought was privacy.

PART SEVEN

wanna be tagged? just send in an ask x

[kopikokun]

Beach Day Blues༄ l.dh

↳ Out on a day trip to the beach with your boyfriend and his friends, you’re anticipating a fun time filled with sunny memories and sand filled swimsuits. What you’re not expecting is the cold shoulder from your usually happy-go-lucky boyfriend, but you’re going to get to the root of this issue, even if it’ll kill you.

pairing: lee donghyuck x reader ft. yuta, mark & jaehyun

content: fluff, beach day, reverse comfort fic, jealousy fic, very mildly suggestive ending

word count: 2053 words

Request 36: Haechan + “I need a hug.” (42) + “You’re cute when you’re angry.” (47) + “You own my heart.” (59) + Jealousy

← BACK TO NAVI.

— 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐝.

Perhaps you’re being delusional. Perhaps you’re just dehydrated or, maybe, you rationalise, the scalding rays of the evening Sun have burned not only your skin but your brain cells too (if there were any to begin with). Maybe all of this is just in your head and you’re overthinking it.

    “Hey,” someone hisses, “is it just me or is Donghyuck giving you the cold shoulder?”

    At the question, or rather observation, your head swivels an almost sharp 90 degrees to stare Yuta straight in the eyes. “So, it wasn’t just me thinking that!”

    Yuta chuckles. “Yeah, he definitely seems off…” He peers at Donghyuck discreetly from beneath his sunglasses before turning back towards you. “Did you guys get into a fight or something?”

    “A fight? No way!” You pause, suddenly doubting yourself. “At least, I don’t think so…”

    Though you’re confident in your verdict of innocence regarding a fight, Yuta’s question prompts you to briefly run through the events of the day. To preface things, you, your boyfriend, Donghyuck, and a few of your friends—namely, Yuta, Jaehyun and Mark—had decided around half a month ago to clear up one day in advance for a ‘beach day’ this week. The idea had sprung after someone had brought up how nice and sunny the weather had been lately, and everyone just unanimously came to the conclusion that sunny weather equals beach day.

     You had begun packing for this trip a few days ahead to the surprise of everyone including yourself, which is a testament to your overwhelming excitement, because you rarely--if ever--pack that early for just a single day trip. But who can blame you? This would be your first official trip with Donghyuck. No, you should rephrase that. This would be your first official trip with Donghyuck as your boyfriend. You’ve been on plenty of trips before when you two were just ‘friends’, but now--and maybe this is the romanticist in you which you’ve successfully kept stored away up until recently speaking--it just feels different. You’re sure someone out there can relate, because you’ve never been one to obsess over something as feeble as a label, yet this trip has had your stomach in knots for ages.

  The packing process had gone smoothly--neither you nor Donghyuck had forgotten anything--and so had the car ride over. As far as you can recall, your day at the beach so far has gone without a hitch too. You’d had a little picnic, dipped in the oddly warm sea, played some beach volleyball (badly) and gotten some icecream afterward. No fights, no issues, no nothing.

   Maybe, you think, he found out I was involved in that little switch up with the sea water. You don’t entertain the idea for too long though immediately casting it away, because you know Donghyuck would never be the type to get so upset over a prank.

    So, why the attitude?

    You gaze at Donghyuck’s back, hoping that this mystery might just unravel itself if you stare long enough.

    “Huh…” Yuta’s voice tears you from your zealous staring competition with Donghyuck’s shoulders. “Then I wonder what’s up…”

    You sigh. You know you should confront him and have a mature conversation about what’s bothering him, but that’s so much easier said than done. Maybe this is God’s way of punishing you for ridiculing all those scenes in cheesy teen flicks where the couple would experience a major fall-out because of poor communication. During said scenes, you’d be pulling your hair out, internally screaming at the couple to just freaking talk already, yet now that you’ve been presented this obstacle for you to overcome yourself, you’re erring on the side of caution.

    Come on, you reason, I’ve been friends with Donghyuck for over half-a-decade and we’ve gotten into our fair share of arguments during those five years. What’s so different about now?

    Yeah, you’re right. You find yourself agreeing with your own thoughts, physically nodding along like you’re speaking to someone. Yuta raises a concerned eyebrow at you. Nothing’s different compared to then. You’re doing it again. He’s just my boyfriend, and that’s just a label. Stop. Obsessing. Over. Labels.

    Admittedly, it’s a bit embarrassing having to psyche yourself up to do this, but that’s not what’s important right now. What’s important is that little pep-talk, no matter how laughable it sounded, has gotten you to stand and saunter to Donghyuck with utmost confidence. In hindsight, you should’ve said something to Yuta beforehand instead of just springing from your seat and marching away. The thought hadn’t crossed your mind though, as it was obviously preoccupied with something arguably much more important than giving him the luxury of context.

    You decide not to be too transparent about your feelings at first as you take a seat beside Donghyuck on the sand, leaning your head on his shoulder, hoping that all of this was really just your imagination getting the best of you. You silently plead that he’ll perhaps treat you like he normally would, giving you a little peck on the cheek or at least wrapping his arm around your waist. Unfortunately, your hopes are smothered just as quickly as they arise because Donghyuck doesn’t even bat an eye at you, continuing to chat with Jaehyun and flat-out ignoring your presence. Still optimistic for a reaction, you leave a chaste kiss to his bare shoulder, just to let him know that “Hey, I’m here!”, but to no avail. Infuriatingly, he doesn’t even flinch. All he does is drone on to Jaehyun about something you couldn’t care less about.

    You huff. Audibly. A last ditch effort in vying for Donghyuck’s attention. It goes just as well as your previous attempts. You cross your arms, glaring at the side of Donghyuck’s stubborn little head, hoping to bore a deep hole through his brain. Maybe then he’ll finally take notice of you. Sensing the undeniable tensity in the air, Jaehyun clears his throat awkwardly, offering Donghyuck some lame excuse about needing to take a piss, before shuffling away. Well, at least someone knows how to take a hint.

    With Jaehyun’s departure, you’re left alone with Donghyuck. Usually, he’d be leaping to drown you in affection the second you two had privacy--or even if you two didn’t, to be frank--but all he does now is fiddle with the strings of his swimming shorts absentmindedly.

    “What’s wrong, Hyuck?” you finally ask, desperate to break this frustratingly suffocating silence. “Is something wrong?”

    Finally, after what seems like centuries, Donghyuck acknowledges your existence, though the look he gives you is not a pleasant one. In fact, it’s one of agitation. His tongue prods at his inner cheek before he says, tone bitter, “I don’t know. Why don’t you tell me?”

    Evidently taken aback, you crease your eyebrows at him. “I… Did I do something wrong, babe?”

    “Oh, come on,” he scoffs, scornful amusement overtaking his normally amiable features. “Don’t pretend like you don’t know. You can just come out and say it.”

    “Say what, Hyuck?”

    “How much more you’re into Mark than into me,” Donghyuck says like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

    You can’t help but laugh, simply bewildered as to how on Earth he came to this conclusion. “I’m into who now?”

    “Mark,” Donghyuck rolls his eyes, “don’t have to pretend like you’re surprised.”

  “I’m not into--” you sigh, a smile of disbelief tugging at your lips. “Okay, tell me why you think I’m into Mark.”

    “I don’t think. I know,” Donghyuck argues and you scoff, “but it’s obvious. And I have proof. Take when we were playing volleyball for instance. The whole time, you kept eyeing Mark up and laughing at his jokes. All of them. Even the weird ones that nobody gets.”

    You snort. “Baby… I wasn’t ‘eyeing Mark up’, I was watching him just in case he missed the ball. And about the joke thing, to his credit, some of them were actually pretty funny! But, as for the the rest--and don’t tell Mark I said this--I felt kinda bad nobody else laughed at them, so I just laughed along with him. Trust me, I’ve been in his shoes before and it sucks. Not all of us are born as naturally as funny as you, Hyuck.” You’re a little remorseful that you’re essentially dissing Mark, but you’re sure he’d understand. Your relationship’s on the line here.

    Donghyuck harrumphs, but you can tell by the slight quirk of his lip that he’s a little tickled by you poking fun at Mark and he’s totally been swayed by your compliment.

    “Okay, fine that explains that, but how about when we went swimming just now? Why did you and Mark keep exchanging funny looks?”

    “That?” You giggle. “You know how your drink was mysteriously replaced by seawater?”

    “Yeah,” he trails off, his suspicion growing by the second.

    “Who do you think that was?”

    Donghyuck groans. “Wait, that was you? Seriously? That was mean, babe.”

  “Aww, I know, Hyuck. I’m sorry,” you coo. Your hand inches its way closer to his as you attempt to intertwine your fingers together.

    Donghyuck rejects your endeavour of fondness. “Nu-uh, no way. I’m not done with you yet.”

    “Oh my God, Hyuck, there’s more?” you complain, though there’s a tint of amusement in your voice.

    “Yes, there’s more, and you won’t be able to worm your way out of this one either,” he says smugly, as if it’d be a good thing if you in fact, couldn’t worm your way out of his next accusation. “How about when we went to get ice cream and you kept sliding up next to him?”

    You pout. “I just wanted to try the watermelon popsicle he got.���

    Donghyuck blinks at you, his once irritated expression dissolving. He seems dumbfounded as you hold his gaze, your mirthful smile never faltering. He turns away from you. “Oh, well… then whatever. I guess you aren’t into Mark.”

    “Hyuck,” you say, hand crawling up his arm, “were you jealous?”

    “Well, yeah, obviously,” he deadpans, still refusing to meet your gaze.

    You giggle. “You’re cute when you’re angry.”

    His cold facade is immediately abandoned at your teasing intonation, and just like that, your cheery Hyuck is back. “Baby,” he whines, readjusting himself so he’s facing you head-on, “don’t tease me. I couldn’t help but be jealous, you know?”

    “And why is that?”

    Donghyuck purses his lips. “Why? What do you mean why?” He gestures up and down, eyes sweeping over you. “Look how pretty you are! What am I supposed to do when you look this good all the time? It’s unfair, really, that you’re this pretty.”

    A blistering heat, one that is much hotter than the Sun, gathers in your cheeks. “Oh really now, Hyuck?”

    “Yes, really,” he says, genuity seeping into his every word. “Literally, everyday I’m surprised you’re even real.” You grin bashfully and Donghyuck pounds his fist to his chest dramatically like he’s been shot. “See! You’re only smiling and I’m already having heart palpitations at just twenty years old.”

    “Okay, okay, Hyuck. You can stop hyping me up now,” you chuckle. You’re beyond glad that your boyfriend has returned to his spirited self, but you know you should address what just happened seriously, just in case. “But hey, I’m sorry that I made you feel that way. Looking back, it definitely could’ve been misinterpreted as flirting and I would never want you to have any reason to feel insecure about our relationship because you own my heart, Hyuck.”

    “Aw, babe, you can be really cheesy when you want to be,” says Donghyuck, pinching your cheeks. He plays what you said off casually, but you know that deep down, it resonates with him, and he honestly appreciates your sincerity. “Come here, I need a hug.”

    “Right now? There are people around, Hyuck.”

    “But you look so good right now. I can’t resist.”

    “I don’t know, Hyuck…” You smile demurely.

    “Alright, then what about,” Donghyuck reaches to tuck your hair behind your ear, whispering, “we ditch the beach day and go cuddle in the car? My skin’s burning, anyway.”

    You grin. “They’re gonna notice that we went missing, you know?”

    “So?” Donghyuck challenges, leaning in to place a short but telling kiss on the juncture which connects your ear and your jaw. “Even better. I want them to know.”

[merryfortune]

Peck

Written for 100ships Challenge on Dreamwidth

Prompt #41 Dove

Ship: Snowangelshipping | Asana/Chevelle

Fandom: Yu-Gi-Oh! SEVENS

Word Count: 1,899

Rating: T

Warnings: No Warnings Apply

Tags:  Fluff, First Kiss, Humour, Puberty Blues, Misunderstandings,  Mild Innuendo

  Asana had been thinking about it for a while now but it was probably time for her and Chevelle to have their first kiss.

  She had come to this conclusion after much thought. It just seemed like the next milestone they ought to achieve. After all, they have been on a handful of dates already in the short time they had decided to officially court as it were and they had also spent many moments holding hands.

   Though, it was in the sweetness of holding hands that Asana did predict a possible issue. Chevelle liked to go very slowly, it appeared. Asana did not mind but she still distinctly recalled the very first time they had held hands as a romantic act rather than a platonic one. It most certainly caught Chevelle up in a flurry, it made Asana laugh - both now and then - but she wondered if it was an omen that was going to set the tone for the rest of the relationship milestones that she envisioned for them both.

   Chevelle had lovely hands. They were magician’s hands, long slender fingers with a soft palm. Although, none but Asana knew this privilege given that he wore white gloves all the time but Asana had her tricks.

   She had invited Chevelle up to their private garden on the roof for a high tea. It was their favourite locale for a casual date; the sort of date that didn’t count towards Asana’s personal tally of all the dates that they had ever been on. Teatime and high teas were their private time to bond, not necessarily to date. There was a distinction though even Asana, ever eloquent, did often fail to explain it but Chevelle understood and agreed with her on that note. Though in this instance, high tea could absolutely be a date since Asana had big plans and she enacted them well before they got to the roof.

   She slipped out her hand to Chevelle’s right arm and interlocked it. Asana moved in closer and soon enough, she had Chevelle entangled in her own arms, making him a blubbering, blushing mess. But Asana didn’t stop there, although Chevelle’s reaction was already both sweet and satisfying. She slid her hands down Chevelle’s arm and put her fingers under the fabric of his gloves.

   He looked fit to protest her, even Trapigeon, ever loyal on his shoulder was making a loud fuss, but Asana came well prepared for any duel and love was absolutely the be all and end all duel. She nuzzled in even closer as she held onto his hand: both of hers locked over his, fingers entwining, toying with the glove, threatening to turn it loose, and then Asana gave Chevelle the look. It was utterly angelic. She batted her big, blue eyes at him and suddenly, her little dove was singing a very different tune to the embarrassed and rebuked one that he was trying to muster.

   “You are a sly one, princess.” Chevelle swallowed his initial reaction as Asana held his hand, playful and tugging at him, slowly wriggling off his glove until they had skin to skin contact. It was utterly scandalous. Salacious, even.

   But just once was enough to get Chevelle hooked on the idea of escorting Asana around like a true gentleman. Sometimes with gloves on, sometimes not. Now, Chevelle was comfortable walking around anywhere holding hands with Asana. On the school grounds, even in the corridors, and whilst on their dates around the scenic and romantic spots of Goha City, too. 

   However, that had been a while ago now and whilst it was a very special memory that Asana cherished, she thought it was high time to make some more like that. She loved the feeling of Chevelle’s hands - they were delicate yet made her feel safe to hold onto - and thus, she had no doubt in her mind that she would love the sensation of Chevelle’s lips as well. She had found herself observing him as he drank tea or ate sandwiches at their private tea parties. He carried himself exactly like a bird, behaving as though he were brittle and because of that, his demeanour was of grace and poise. Asana had never been kissed before but she was certain that if it was Chevelle, it would be entirely gentle and she couldn’t imagine a more wonderful thing.

   So, it was time to strategise once more and once more, her old faithful prevailed. She would be direct and forthright, no trickery or traps. So, she chose a date from the calendar and per her expectations, it was going to be a splendid afternoon for a tea party. Just herself and Chevelle, separated only by a multi-tiered display for their exquisite cakes, sandwiches, and other treats the Goha Sixth Elementary School cafeteria could provide. After all, it wasn’t just going to be her first kiss, it was going to be Chevelle’s as well, so Asana planned accordingly and she thought nothing would appeal to him more than familiarity and comfort, underneath a blue sky. She was swooning now just thinking about it.

   When the day came, Asana could not have been more pleased with the weather and had pep to her step all day. It surprised even Chevelle who had no idea that Asana intended to spring the possibility of their first kiss on him but was excited nonetheless for another of their tea parties.

   The wind was mild and the day itself was pleasantly balmy. There had been a soft rain the prior night and as such, the garden still glistened with a tender rain, making everything bloom brighter and more vivid. Their table by the garden centrepiece was set already with white linen table cloths and a display laden with macarons, meringues, and cucumber sandwiches without the crusts. It could not have been more perfect.

   Asana sighed happily as even though she had been the one to organise all this, it was Chevelle who was leading her through the garden bed paths that burgeoned with verdant flowers to their private spot. Hands entwined, of course. 

   “My lady.” Chevelle told her as he pulled out a chair for Asana.

   “My gentleman.” Asana returned the chivalry and sat down, Chevelle tucking her in. He then joined her by sitting at the chair across from her, the only other chair, of course.

   Chevelle smiled as he made an all but impossible selection from the goods in front of him and it was such a feather soft smile, it made Asana’s heart skip a beat. She watched, more eager than she meant to, as he gracefully poured out a warm cup of earl grey tea then took a sip. It only affirmed to Asana that she most definitely wanted to have their first kiss right here, right now and thus, threw all caution to the wind whilst Chevelle savoured that first taste of tea.

   “Pardon me, Chevelle,” Asana interrupted him and his eyes flicked up to her.

   “Yes?” he replied.

   “Have you ever thought about kissing me?” she asked, blurted out, really. She surprised even herself with just how uncouth she sounded.

   Chevelle’s eyes widened, he went bright red, “I - I could never.” he sputtered. “That would be entirely indecent of me.”

   “O-oh.” Asana murmured. She was uncertain as to how she ought to feel in the face of such a response.

   “We are far too young to be deflowering ourselves like that.” Chevelle continued, rambling and embarrassed.

   Asana blinked. It was just a kiss. Actually, it was just the mere proposition of a kiss. What was all this about being deflowered? Her eyebrow twitched as it just began to dawn on her but there may have been a misunderstanding between herself and Chevelle.

   “A-And what would I say to Galient? To my parents? No, it is far too early for us to even think about introducing chicks into our relationship.” Chevelle asked and his poor face was just getting redder and redder.

   “Chevelle!” Asana yelped. “Please, stop, I believe there is some confusion.”

   “Confusion?” Chevelle echoed. “Whatever confusion could there be, you are clucky already and I am still barely out of the nest. I could never kiss you because the consequences could be dire, I’m not ready to be a father.”

   Asana’s heart quaked and she wanted ever so badly to laugh at Chevelle but fortunately, she suppressed the impulse, “Chevelle, why are you under the impression that a kiss could, well, bear offspring?”

   “My parents have given me the birds and bees talk, of course. A kiss is what leads to the insemination of the egg.” Chevelle explained, indignant and folding his arms to prove his indignation.

   “I see.” Asana replied and she finally understood this situation. She nodded her head in deep though. “Chevelle,” she said, “I think you need someone else to give you the birds and the bees talk, because, er, when humans kiss… It does not turn out like that, not without a lot more… Machinations of the body, let’s say. However, I believe the kiss you were taught about was the cloacal kiss and I can assure you, I do not have one so no risk of chicks.”

   Chevelle, who had finally returned to his usual pallor after huffing and puffing and rambling, turned bright red once more. He agonised in embarrassment and Asana finally permitted herself a polite giggle at Chevelle’s expense. He couldn’t blame her. That was quite a mishap to make and though he had his hands in his face, he took a breath and was able to give Asana a sane and proper answer to the question that had catalysed this incident.

   “Asana, my princess,” he spoke very slowly, “I would be honoured to kiss you. Just once, though, just in case.”

   “So a little peck then?” Asana clarified.

   Chevelle slowly set down his hands and nodded, “That sounds perfect.” he replied.

   So, even though they had just sat down, they already got up again for there was a far more enticing treat than those piled high on the displays. Asana was suave as she got up, Chevelle was far more nervous than her and his hands shook. It was cute, making Asana giggle a small giggle, a superfluous breath, really.

   She stood close to Chevelle who appeared to want a bit more space. The compromise was awkward, not quite close enough but too far either and gave Chevelle the room to breathe that he apparently needed. His poor cheeks with their high cheekbones were slick with a nervous sweat and his pale skin was pink once more.

   “Are you ready?” Asana politely asked.

   “As I’ll ever be on such short notice.” Chevelle warbled back to her.

   “Good.” Asana said and she was the one to swoop in.

   The resulting kiss was anything but romantic, nothing at all that Asana had imagined but the fragrance of earl grey tea wafted through it so she couldn’t complain. Chevelle’s lips were soft but fleeting. The kiss lasted less than six or seven seconds, easily, but even after such brevity, Asana’s heart beat faster in her chest and she savoured the soft sensation. Her fingers brushing over her own mouth whilst she watched Chevelle retreat. He hid his face in the crook of his arm, clearly panicking that he had done something scandalous but it was just a kiss. Just a peck.

[patriciasage]

Forgiveness

Author: Patricia_Sage

Fandom: The Adventure Zone - Balance

Summary:

Taako sighs and takes off his hat, wringing the rim of it in his dark, scarred hands. Lup dissipates some of her aggressive energy at the sight of his walls coming down. It’s sibling honesty time.

“I understand why Lucretia did it. I respect it and I respect her.” He stares at the kitchen tiles. “I don’t hate her. I just can’t forgive her.”

posted in full under the break but you can find me on A03!!

Merle’s house isn’t big enough for all of them, especially with the addition of Kravitz, Mavis and Mookie, Killian, Carey, and Angus. But the weather is so nice that they spend most of their time on the beach, anyway. Lup’s on her way to the kitchen to grab another beer for her and Barry when she hears sniffling coming from the living room. Oh no, that won’t do, nobody cries on a Reunion Day.

As she rounds the corner, ready to tackle someone or give a spectacular pep-talk, she sees that she is not needed. Lucretia is sitting on the couch, wiping her tears on a dark handkerchief. It hurts Lup to see her friend look so worn down, so much older. The elf knows from experience that Lucretia doesn’t respond very well to aggressive comfort, so she’s happy to see Merle sitting on the couch too. Merle and Lucretia always had similar energies, and Lup can see that the cleric is grounding Lucretia in her moment of vulnerability. Lup quietly backs out of the room before they notice her.

But Lucretia speaks before Lup is out of earshot. “He told me he can’t forgive me.” Her voice is an awful combination of heartbroken and resigned. Lup’s curiousity and concern holds her in place. Her heartbeat stumbles when she hears her brother’s name from Merle’s lips.

“You know Taako. He’s stubborn, but he’ll come around.”

“I don’t know if he will.” Lucretia sounds so fragile in that moment. Protectiveness blooms in Lup’s ribcage and she storms to the kitchen.

Taako is delicately placing garnishes on a plate of little sandwiches. His “Kiss the Cook” apron protects his flowy, white shirt from any stains. The shell earring that Merle gave him is tangled in his braid. And Lup loves him more than she loves anyone else on any planet, but she is so pissed at him right now.

“Hey, asshole, stop being so mean to Lucretia.”

Taako turns around. With Kravitz’s encouragement, he no longer casts Disguise Self every day, and Lup is only just getting used to his new, average looks. “I’m not being mean to Lucretia.”

“Well, she’s not crying in Merle’s living room right now because that’s a fun beach activity.” Taako’s mouth tightens and he looks genuinely sad. “I know what happened was brutal, but she did what she thought was right, Taako. That’s no reason to hate her.”

Taako sighs and takes off his hat, wringing the rim of it in his dark, scarred hands. Lup dissipates some of her aggressive energy at the sight of his walls coming down. It’s sibling honesty time.

“I understand why she did it. I respect it and I respect her.” He stares at the kitchen tiles. “I don’t hate her. I just can’t forgive her.”

“Ever?” Lup asks. She leans on the table next to her twin. “Don’t you think that’s a little harsh, bro? She’s been through a lot.”

Taako mumbles, “She put me through a lot, too.”

Lup snatches his hat out of his hands and tosses it onto a nearby chair, ignoring his half-assed protest. He finally looks her in the eye. “I lived in a fucking umbrella for over a decade. Davenport forgot everything but his own fucking name! If we can forgive her, why can’t you?”

Taako’s dark eyes are sharp and bright like obsidian. “With all due respect, pumpkin, you don’t know what it’s like to live without you.”

There are a few breaths where they just look at each other. Lup remembers how awful it felt to be trapped in the Umbra Staff, watching and listening to her brother and her friends in trouble, unable to help them, unable to connect with anyone. But she had her memories. She had a purpose. She had hope.

Taako continues to speak, his voice rough and breaking more than usual. “And when I say, ‘live without you’, I don’t mean missing you, babe. I mean living without awareness of you, without any memories of our life.”

This isn’t news to Lup. She knows what Lucretia fed to Fischer. She knows that Taako and Magnus and Merle and Davenport were extracted from their old lives. But she doesn’t like to think about it too hard because empathy reaches for her heart and squeezes. Imagining a life without Taako is sickening and almost incomprehensible.

“I was so alone, and I always felt like something was missing, but I thought I was just fucked up.” Taako laughs humourlessly. “I mean, I am…just a little bit. You know that. We both are.” His smile fades. “But not having you in my life was as if someone used Hole Thrower on my fucking soul.” She reaches out and holds his hand. Their hands are the same size and they’ve always fit perfectly together. “And then I remembered you. And you were still gone. And I could have been looking for you the entire time! You literally spelled it out for me. But I didn’t even know…”

They don’t usually do hugs. Sure, when Lup finally got her corporeal form Taako wouldn’t let her go for a full three minutes. But that was an exception. Usually, their physical affection consists of fist bumps and braiding each other’s hair. But Lup wraps her arms around her brother and squeezes hard. They both need it. Seems like they’re siblings who hug, now.

“I care about Lucretia,” Taako says into her shoulder. ��I don’t want to punish her, that’s not what I’m doing here. But she hurt me in the worst way anyone ever could.” He gently steps out of her embrace. “So, I can’t forgive her.”

Lup’s heart is heavy in her chest as Taako grabs his hat and leaves the kitchen, tray of sandwiches in hand. A few moments later she hears Angus McDonald on the front porch. “Welcome back, sir!”

“Hey, Agnes. You hungry?”

When Lup returns to the beach, Barry asks her if she’s okay. “Yeah, I’m fine. Oh, shit, I forgot the beers.”

“It’s okay, babe.” Barry doesn’t ask her any more questions, but he wraps his arm tightly around her waist. She’s grateful for the grounding contact, grateful for her sweet Barry.

Lucretia and Merle walk down from the house and sit on the sand next to Magnus and Carey. Magnus finishes carving a dolphin out of a piece of driftwood and hands it to Lucretia. She smiles. The hours pass lazily on their perfect day.

Almost 60 feet away from the group, Taako stands ankle-deep in the water. He’s a tiny, solitary figure, staring out at the vast horizon. Lup hates seeing him alone and it’s almost as if her co-worker hears her thoughts because suddenly Kravitz is wading in the water, his pinstripe pants rolled up to his knees. Lup watches the Grim Reaper kiss her brother on the back of the neck and hold him, and the phantom grip on her heart loosens.

Taako will never be alone again. She’ll make sure of it.

[kentuckywrites]

Imperium 2: Chapter 1

Gratam mundi. (Welcome to the world.)

Elma decided, somewhere in the middle of Secretary Nagi’s speech, that it was a crime to schedule meetings during sunny days. BLADE Tower’s top floor was partially surrounded by windows, giving a full view to the city outside. The sunlight teased those inside with a considerable glare, a promise that nothing would dare stand in its way. For once, the meeting flew by, and Elma retained only bits and pieces of it, longing to escape outside. Maybe she could convince Lin to take the day off and come along for a picnic. Goodness knows, she hadn’t had the chance to sit down and truly relax, not even after the Lifehold was found. 

The meeting was partially about that, after all. After her mission to the Lifehold, she’d discovered that the Lifehold had been flooded. On all accounts, everyone with a mimeosome in the city should have collapsed, never to wake up. And yet, something - something - was keeping the Lifehold in working order. Even the Outfitters couldn’t place what was powering the Lifehold, and they’d dug for a while trying to figure it out. Somewhere along the months and months of research, things shifted, and instead the focus was on using the Lifehold to create real human bodies. The meeting was a debrief on what the Outfitters had put together on the matter, which didn’t amount to much, unfortunately. Those systems were damaged after the crash, after the Ganglion attack, after the Vita and Luxaar and Lao and those hideous, awful chimeras. Elma shuddered at the memory.

When Nagi dismissed everyone, Elma was, regrettably, not the first one out the door. She made small talk with Nagi as the first group of people crammed into the elevator, waited for them to head down, waited for the elevator to come back up and take her to the first floor. It was quiet, thankfully, and when she stepped out into the bright summer air, she inhaled, exhaled. Freedom never tasted so sweet.

Elma took a few steps down the stairs, her goal in mind. She’d ask Lin about that picnic, maybe rope Gwin and Irina into joining them. She made the turn into Armory Alley and quickly spotted Lin, who was talking with L at his shop. She was holding something rather long in her hands. A pipe, of some kind? Elma couldn’t imagine what it was at first glance. As she grew closer, she caught some of the conversation.

“...from the interior of a xe-dom! Ferocious mechanical beasts, mind you, and so the part you hold is the rarest sight indeed!”

“Ooh, a xe-dom? What did it do? What was it connected to? Maybe I can incorporate it into this new Skell weapon I’m designing -”

“We believe that it - ah, Elma!” L caught sight of Elma, who approached Lin’s right side and peered at the pipe curiously.

“Elma!” Lin chirped, “How’d the meeting go? Any update on getting our real bodies back?”

Elma shook her head. “Unfortunately, not much progress has been made yet. It’ll be a while before we can say for certain when the Outfitters will be able to finish repairs to the Lifehold.”

“Aw man,” Lin sighed, “Well, it’s still good to hear that work’s being done. I still can’t believe I wasn’t recruited to help with that.”

“Your skills are far more valuable in the city than out there,” She said, “I know it doesn’t feel like much of anything, but trust me. The work you’ve been doing on Skells here is crucial.”

“I know, I know.” 

Lin turned back to L, whose hands were clasped. He was leaning in slightly, as if he was trying to better hear the news Elma had brought along. “Hey L, how much did you say this would be again?”

“Ah, we are so pleased that your interested is picked!” L cheered, “It would be a mere five thousand credits for such a fine -”

“Deal!” Lin juggled her new pipe and her comm device as she transferred the credits over to L’s device. He smiled as his own device pinged with the newly received credits, and Lin quickly put her comm device away to admire her purchase. “Man oh man...L, would you let me know if you find any more of these?”

“But of course! We shall keep your name reserved and primed for any incoming materials of that nature,” L nodded, “Does anything else swipe your curiosities this fine afternoon?”

Elma spoke up before Lin could properly respond. “Actually, L, do you have time to spare today? I was thinking of taking the rest of the day off and inviting some friends along for a picnic out in Primordia. The weather’s beautiful for it.”

“Ooh, a picnic? Please tell me I’m invited,” Lin begged, “I need an excuse to get out of the workshop. Feels like I’ve been holed up in there for centuries!!”

“Of course you’re invited, Lin.”

“Yay!!”

L sighed wistfully. “We so wish to join, but our dearest assistant is out today, and we are tasked with managing this stand with our own two hands.”

“Is Jejebba okay?” Lin asked, concerned.

“Ah, he is doing most wonderfully!” L shook his hands in defense, “He is merely engaging in celebratory festivities. A friend of his recently partook in what humans would call ‘marriage’, and their party has since moved to Army Pizza.”

“I didn’t know Ma-non got married…” Lin wondered out loud, “I guess you learn something new every day.”

“That’s a shame, L,” Elma said, “Perhaps another day, then.” She turned to Lin, glancing at the pipe still in her hands before asking, “Do you know where Pongo is? We could ask him to come along.”

“Like a big family reunion!” Lin said, “Man, I haven’t seen him in ages, actually. What about you, L, has he stopped by recently?”

L put a thoughtful finger to his chin. “We don’t believe he has, not in quite some time. Last we heard, he was assigned to a tippy top secret mission!”

“Did it have anything to do with...the you know what?”

Elma watched L’s expression change in mere seconds. Of course, they both knew what Lin was referring to. It seemed like only yesterday that they’d seen Pongo walking through the city again, renewed and alive after the events in Cauldros. And it felt surreal, knowing that he was never truly human. Pongo was, in fact, an avatar of Mira, a creation of the sentient planet that it could inhabit and influence. From what Pongo had explained, his relationship with Mira was somewhat tense. They were both learning about what it meant to share a body, and though Elma couldn’t quite relate to his plight, she was proud of how Pongo was handling things. 

Well...proud of most of it. She couldn’t admit to it out loud, but hearing about how he needed to sacrifice himself, watching him fall into Mount M’Gando without a second thought...it scared her. Not much could affect her, but many things on Mira had, and she knew many things on Mira would continue to haunt her. Even now, hearing that Pongo had been away on this mission for a while, she couldn’t help but worry. He was an incredibly strong companion, and it had been an honor watching him grow and improve. But he was always self-sacrificing, always cared about others more than himself. He couldn’t stop crossing the line, let alone draw the line himself. 

And that worried look on L’s face...Elma thought of all the possibilities, good and bad. What did he know that they didn’t? Did he harbor the same fears?

“He would have informed us if his mission were to do with Mira,” L said, after a long pause. “He only managed to provide small cutouts of his true intent, but neglected to tell us specifics. From what we gathered, Pongo is the conductor of some form of treasure hunt.”

Some of the tension in Elma’s shoulders released, and Lin got stars in her eyes, blissfully ignorant of her and L’s concern. “Now that sounds exciting!! Forget working on the Lifehold or Skells, Miran buried treasure sounds awesome!”

“I bet he’ll tell us all about it once he returns,” Elma said, “For now, Lin, shall we prepare for the picnic?”

“Heck yeah!” She waved goodbye to L, who waved back with a somewhat forced smile. “See ya later, L! Thanks again for the pipe!”

“It is our pleasure!” L replied as they walked further away, his attention suddenly shifting to a new potential customer that had approached his shop. Elma led Lin down Armory Alley, who was skipping along with a pep in her step. It relieved Elma’s tensions further, seeing the young Outfitter look so full of life. Perhaps her concerns were a little misguided, rooted in previous encounters. After all, Pongo was a capable young man, and he could hold his own in a fight. She only hoped that whatever treasure he was after, he was cautious in his approach and took the right measures to -

“Elma?”

Elma blinked, realizing she had become lost in her thoughts. Lin was tugging her arm gently, the pipe cradled in her elbow, and she was using her other hand to point further ahead. Elma squinted. There was nothing terribly interesting up ahead, save for the usual tents, some Skells walking past, BLADEs whispering to each other as a woman, tattered and beaten, walked through the East Gate -

Wait a minute.

Elma didn’t waste any time in rushing forward. Even though everyone around her looked on with slight horror, she could only see that the woman was badly hurt, and she’d need help fast. She made it to the woman just in time to catch her as she fell, and Elma let her head rest on her shoulder. Her entire body was covered in blood, bruises, open gashes leaking blue...but at least, doing a quick once-over, nothing vital had been damaged. All flesh wounds, in an ironic twist.

Lin was by Elma’s side in a matter of seconds, her comm device out and scanning over the woman’s body. Some small beeps resonated from the device, and Lin looked up at Elma, frowning. “She seems okay, based on the scan. Maybe we should get her to the MMC just in case.”

“No...no.”

Elma was shocked when she heard the woman speak. She lifted her head slightly, her short black hair tickling Elma’s nose. Underneath her hair, Elma could see light skin, some scratches on her face, and…

Her eyes. Indigo, pupiless. 

Just like Pongo’s.

“You must be Elma,” The woman gave a weak smile, “Sorry we had to meet like this. But...but I need your help. Pongo’s in trouble.”

Elma’s heart sank to her stomach. Lin’s eyes went wide, and any stars left over from her astonishment at the pipe vanished. 

“You know Pongo?” Lin asked a question that Elma knew the probable answer to, but she wouldn’t be certain until she heard it from the woman’s lips.

The woman tried to sit herself up straighter, but Elma kept her hands on her forearms to make sure she didn’t fall again. She spoke again, after forcing a light giggle.

“I’m...well, I’m his sister. I’m Nessa-vara’is, but you can call me Nessa for short.”

[marmolady]

Growing Pains: Part Three

PART ONE     PART TWO

Main Pairings: Estela x MC/Taylor (f)

Summary: Post-ending. For Liv and her mothers, Taylor and Estela, a turbulent period of transition is afoot. Set primarily in the distant future of 2033.

Word Count: 5678

More Liv fics here: Livita, Teething Problems,  Milestones and Memories, Mutual Comfort,  All That Matters

Reviews and reblogs are hugely appreciated!

Tagging: @brightpinkpeppercorn, @mrsmontoya, @saivilo, @edgydepressedchoicesthot, @sceptilemasterr, @quinnkellys-wife, @greengroove 

La Huerta, 2033

The sun slowly began to set, and a cool breeze came in from the sea. The reunion was in full swing, and Taylor, had found her way poolside, the traditional centre of all activity. The energy all around her was wonderfully refreshing after all the time she’d spent hiding herself away from the world; the sounds of the most familiar of voices as her friends caught up with one another, therapeutic. She was far too much of an extrovert to isolate herself; she knew that now.

Sitting down at the bar, it only took a few skilled flourishes of bottles before Raj was handing her a signature drink.

“It’s been a little while since I’ve had one of these,” she laughed. The joys of pregnancy. Worth it, but she’d be lying if she wasn’t a little relieved it was all over in time for the reunion. “Mm, that’s fruity! And just the right amount of kick to it. I say this every year, but you really do know me.”

“Another happy customer at the BhandarBar? You know there’s nothing I’d rather hear!” Raj beamed. He came around the bar and sat beside Taylor, sensing a need in her. “I feel like we haven’t hung out in ages-- last time I saw you, you had a baby on board. How has life been treating you, Taylor, my friend?”

“Oh, you know. My whole body gearing up for looking after baby, and then trying to tell it ‘no, that’s not what’s happening, here’; that’s been a bit of a challenge. My mood swings have been epic. I know she already did deserve one, but christ, Estela deserves a medal. Liv as well. I swear I’ve been like a walking hormone or something.”

“Well, if you need someone to lay it all on….”

He didn’t even get to finish. Taylor had her arms around him, hugging him tight. Where the tears were coming from now, she didn’t quite know. Maybe it was just a release of everything she’d been carrying these past months. But come they did, thick and fast.

“That’s it, bro. Let it all out. I’ve got plenty of shirts if you get boogers on this one--”

Taylor spluttered, laughing until she made herself choke and cough. “I don’t even know why I’m crying! That’s just me right now. A little bit useless.” Well, if you talk like that, you’re gonna be sobbing all night.

“You? Never. We have witnesses! You are definitely not useless. You just need a bit of Taylor Time right now. You’re allowed to take some Taylor Time.”

“For how long?” Taylor sighed. “Liv’s only nine-- sorry, nine and three-hundred-and-sixty-four days. That distinction is important to her. But she needs me. My body’s all geared up to be a mom, but with Liv I feel like I just can’t do anything. Some days I couldn’t even get out of bed.”

“Trust me. I’ve had those days. You know I’ve had those days. And listening when your mind and body need a rest isn’t a bad thing. If Liv was feeling the way you were, what would you have her do?”

Taylor pouted. “Who told you you could use my double standards to pep talk me? Fine! I’d tell her to be kind to herself. Every time.”

“So. What are you going to do?”

“Be… kind to myself,” Taylor said begrudgingly. Damn you, Raj. I can’t argue with that logic.

“We’re going to home-school Livi. For a year, use that time to reassess where we want to be in life. I’m a little nervous, but… I like that I’m going to be more proactive in her life. I’m glad I had Michael; having him was one of the best things I’ve ever done, but I want to be able to put my energy into Liv, and Estela, our little unit. Mostly, I’m excited. I am so, so ready to feel like a mom again.”

“Aw, Taylor-baby, you always were. But I getcha, sometimes you kind of lose a part of yourself in all that life throws up. And whatever life wants to throw at Liv, you guys got her back. She’s done all right for herself with you two.”

Exhaling, wiping away those stupid tears-- hadn’t she cried enough?-- Taylor nestled into a warm hug. Raj was a talented man, but no more so than in his ability to make everything feel all right. Together, her family had weathered many storms, and their bond would carry them through any still to come.

  _____________________________

La Huerta, 2027

 A resounding crack of lightning had Liv dive under the blankets, shaking in her Batman pyjamas. To her, it felt as though the storm had been raging for hours. Never had she heard the sky sound so angry. She burrowed under her Mama Estela’s arm.

“Mommy, it’s so loud,” she whimpered.

“I know, mija,” Estela said gently, stroking her four-year-old daughter’s hair. “But it can’t hurt us in here. Our house is strong and safe.”

The creaking of wood in the wind made Liv nervous. If the house was safe, why did it have to complain so much? Was it trying to scare her?

“It’s okay, Livi-sweetie,” Taylor soothed. “We’re all gonna sit this one out together.”

The family trio were sharing the big queen-size bed, Liv tucked up snuggly between her two mothers. There had been no talk of attempting to settle Liv in her own room; she was distressed, and that meant she could take security in the maternal bed.

As the howling wind became a frightening roar, Liv whined softly. At the foot of the bed, the little dog, Fenix, was sleeping soundly. Fenix didn’t have the best of hearing, which on this occasion struck Liv as quite lucky. The cat, Madam Mierdita, seemed more grumpy at the disturbance than frightened, growling and changing colours with every scary rumble.

“Hey, Liv,” Taylor said cheerily, hoping her easy tone would lessen the tension, “Knock, knock!”

Liv peered over the covers. Was now really the time? She’d humour her silly Mama Taylor. “Who’s there?”

“Europe.”

“Europe, who?” Liv asked, then her eyes went wide and she gave a shout of laughter. “Ha! You’re a poo, Mama Taylor!”

“No, you’re a poo!” Taylor chuckled. Saved, once again, by some good old fashioned toilet humour.

Estela rolled her eyes and shook her head exaggeratedly. “Oh, cariňa, you blow me away with your comedic wit.”

“Yeah!” Liv affirmed enthusiastically, apparently still oblivious to the art of sarcasm. “It was super funny!” She flinched at another crash of lightning, but didn’t hide under the covers.

“Well, my fan club, here comes another one!” Taylor smirked at Estela’s dramatic groaning. If it eased Liv’s fear, they could and would do this for hours. “Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?”

“I dunno, Mommy. W-why?” Liv asked, her voice wavering as a rumble of thunder seemed to shake the very earth. But if the world was ending, it would surely wait to hear the rest of Mama Taylor’s joke first.

“To get to the bottom!”

On queue, Liv squealed with laughter. “You said ‘bottom’!”

“You know, Taylor, I’m sensing a theme here.”

“Hey-- toilet jokes aren’t my favourite, but they’re a solid number two!”

“Dios mío! Why do I feel like I’m in for a long night?” Estela reached to tickle Taylor’s belly, which served to push Liv ever deeper into her giggle fit. She could never adequately express just how grateful she was that their daughter had that gorgeous dork to see her through the scary times. Don’t you ever change, mi amor.

The storm raged on. Cocooned together in their humble sanctuary, the small family saw it out-- or at least, Taylor and Estela did. Liv nodded off amid the thunder and the lightning, the wind and the rain… safe in her mothers’ arms.

 _______________________________

 La Huerta, 2033

 “Livi-- be careful!”

“I am careful!” Liv hollered down from a towering palm tree. She had everything under contro--

There was a thud, and the squeak of breath being forced from Liv’s lungs as she hit the ground hard.

“Ow.”

Taylor rushed over, but her view was quickly blocked by young Isla, who had gotten there first.

“Where are you hurt?”

“I’m not hurt, Isla. See?”

“Did you hit your head?”

“No.”

“How many fingers am I holding up?”

“Three.”

“Can you move all your arms and legs?”

“Yes!”

“On a scale of one to ten--”

Taylor cut in, feeling simultaneously relieved and incredibly fond of her friends’ little nurse in training. “Thanks, Isla, sweetheart. I think we’re good from here. Right?”

Liv scowled and jumped to her feet as if nothing had happened. “I’m fine, Mom.”

“Oh, Livita, foiled again by your old friend, gravity?” Estela laughed from her comfortable spot on the beach. She’d seen Liv through enough bumps and scrapes to know when there was nothing to worry about.

Taylor snorted, and ruffled Liv’s short hair. “Gravity’s a bitch. Try and respect her in the future, okay?”

Gravity wasn’t just a bitch. Gravity was Liv’s nemesis. A literal pain in her ass. Someday, Liv had decided, she was going to get a pilot licence like her Uncle Jake. That would teach bloody gravity.

A yell distracted Liv from her plotting.

“Hey, Livia! Livia!” Reggie hollered as he pelted up the beach. “The big tortoise came back! Diego said we can feed him! Quick!”

That got her attention. The past two years, the mighty Shore Guardian had lumbered into their midst during the reunion, and it had been an incredible thrill. In an instant, she was off and running.

“Liv, when I say to be careful…,” Taylor started.

“I know!” she called over her shoulder, “ Actually be careful. But you know I’m not scared of some old Shore Guardian, right?”

The tortoise was colossal. Built like a tank; the peak of his pyramid-like shell reached the height of a man. It had come as an immense relief to everyone when the creature started appearing on La Huerta’s shores, that he was of a docile and placid disposition.

“Helloooo there, Shelly!” Liv called, clambering up and over the rocks, a bunch of glowing flowers in her hand. “I brought you a snack.”

“See,” Diego said from his perch, overlooking the beast, “I told you he’d come back. He’s pretty smart. He must know that the reunion happens every year, and that the reunion means kids bearing flowers. I think you’ve started something, though-- the Vaanti kids are all over this guy when he hangs near Elyys’tel.”

“He’s less scary than the yeti-bear. I like the yeti-bear, but Mom and Mom say I’m still too young to give her a pat. Do you think I should make friends with the Sea Guardian next?”

The Sea Guardian was rarely observed. It was something like a plesiosaur with scales all the colours of the rainbow, and even after more than a decade since Cetus’ demise, it seemed as though the monster was only gettng larger. Sighting the beast was something of a badge of honour for young Vaanti, with the bolder among them daring to touch its back-- some even managing to take loose scales when the beast was shedding. There had only been a few serious injuries over the years, but the practice was largely frowned upon-- especially by those old enough to remember Cetus’ wrath. If there was one thing everyone agreed upon, it was that they did not want another Cetus.

Diego chuckled nervously. “Better stick to old Shelly. He appreciates your friendship.”

“Yeah, Livia, you should look after the friendships you’ve got,” Reggie said, huffing and puffing as he came over the ledge. “It’s not like you’ve got many.”

“Hey!”

“Was I insensitive again?” he asked sheepishly. “Sorry.”

“A little,” Diego said. “Why don’t you come closer and feed Shelly with Liv?”

Reggie eyed the hulking beast. “No… no, I’m fine just watching. A good scientist never interferes with wildlife. You know Jane Goodall used to feed chimps bananas? But that was like… years and years ago. Now we know that is not the best way to science.”

“Whatever, Reggie,” Liv laughed, “but don’t cry to me when I’m Shelly’s best friend.”

Down on the sand, Liv could feel the enormous presence of the giant tortoise as he towered over her, sniffing.

“Good boy, Shelly. You wanna flower?”

Diego watched her, ready to swoop down and pull her to safety if the beast appeared bothered. “Good job, Livi. Nice and slow so you don’t freak him out. Like… like you’re Hiccup and he’s Toothless.”

Liv chuckled, and peered into Shelly’s mouth as it gaped open to take a flower. “I think he is toothless.”

“Yeah, but I bet his hard mouth could break all the bones in your hand!” Reggie piped up.

“Shelly would never,” Diego assured. “He knows better than to bite the hand that feeds him.”

The tortoise gave a rumbling grumble of pleasure as he swallowed a flower.

“How have you guys been recently?” Diego probed, keeping it light, but knowing that life had recently been a rough ride for the kids. “I heard Maia moved schools; that kind of sucks. She was pretty great.”

She was pretty pretty, Liv thought, though she kept that to herself. “I’ve been really sad and lonely. But it’s all better now-- we’re all back here! No mean dumbasses. I wish Maia didn’t have to leave though.”

“I decided I don’t like getting in fights,” Reggie said. “I am now officially a pacifist. But… I guess I’ve gotta make exceptions if people are gonna say stuff about my sisters. They’re only little. They can’t stand up for themselves.”

“Better stick to fighting with your words, Reggie,” Liv said with a little smirk. “I have never seen such a weak-ass punch in my life….”

“Hey, I did pretty good!”

“If I hadn’t jumped in, they’d still be mopping you off the floor now,” she laughed.

“Well, maybe I’m better at more important things, like actually using my brain! You should try it sometime.”

“Okay, okay,” Diego intervened. “Easy, kids! You don’t want to freak old Toothless out.”

Liv looked up at Shelly. He was calmly chewing on the last flower she’d offered him, not batting an eyelid at the raised voices.

“Tio Diego,” she murmured. “Can I tell you something? And Reggie-- you can know too.”

“Of course, you can, Liv.”

“Well… it’s kinda… embarrassing. But I know you won’t laugh. Not when it’s important. I like liked Maia. I thought everyone would laugh at me if they found out I had a crush on a girl. I know it’s not something to be ashamed of, but I was still… too scared.”

“You’re telling us now-- that takes a lot of guts,” Diego told her. “It is scary. You never know how people are going to react. Most people are pretty cool these days, but it only takes one mean person to make you feel sad and small.”

Liv climbed back up onto the rocks to sit by her uncle’s side. “Yeah. Some of the kids already teased me about my moms. I thought there would probably be at least one mean person.”

“That’s fair,” Reggie concluded. “I mean, you’re probably right. If they were jerks about Erin, probably they wouldn’t be any nicer to you. They already think you’re kinda weird.”

Diego put an arm around his niece, and she leaned close. After all these years, he could always tell when she needed a hug. “Coming out and showing yourself to the world should always be on your terms. If you didn’t feel ready, that’s nothing to be ashamed of. It means a lot that you feel comfortable enough to share with me.”

“Of course! You’re my tio. I can tell you anything. Even the things that are just silly and annoying… you listen anyway.” Liv sighed, and threw down her last flower to the great, lumbering tortoise, who scarfed it down eagerly. “I’m sad that Maia is gone. I thought eventually I’d be brave enough. I can be brave with stuff like protecting people who need help, but feelings are harder.”

“Feelings can be the absolute hardest. But we’re on your side, whenever you’re ready to share them. Me and Varyyn, and Reggie, and your moms. Your moms are so proud of you, you know? Being sensitive and caring can be tough, but those feelings are what make you strong. Your Mama Taylor told me you’ve been helping her get up every day when she’s been feeling really down. You make a difference-- a good one. You don’t have to be brave enough for everything all at once.”

“Thanks, Tio. You’re smart. No wonder you wrote like, two whole books. All teachers should be as nice as you.”

“Well, I do my best. And in the end, that’s all you really can do. Do you remember from Cinderella? ‘Have courage, and be kind.’ I’d say you’re both pretty good at that already.”

  ______________________________

La Huerta, 2031

 Seven-year-old Liv reached out her hands to a stricken bird as it flailed in distress. The sound of it being slammed against the window of the house by a larger, more aggressive foe had made her all but jump out of her skin, but if something might be hurt, she had to get over her fright quickly and help.

“Hello birdie…,”she cooed. Her fingers gently stroked the feathers on its back. It stopped flapping, but its breathing was laboured, as if it was struggling for air. Blood had risen from its eyes and nose. “It’s okay… I’m a friend.”

Gently, Liv scooped the wounded animal into her hands and cradled it, crouching over the grass in front of her home.

“Tio Diego! Varyyn! I need help!”

Of course, her uncles came running. They were never far away when tasked with keeping an eye on her; by now they were too well aware of her propensity for wandering into mischief not to be.

“Livita, are you okay--”

“Tio, she’s hurt. I think she’s gonna die. This great big bird got her and hit her against the window.”

Diego was pretty sure Liv had heard the talk about not touching wild animals, especially if they were injured and likely to lash out, but the reminder could wait. One look at the bird told him it was not long for this world.

“She is dying,” Varyyn confirmed, sadly. He exchanged a look with Diego. “It’s very sad… but we must make sure she doesn’t suffer.”

Liv sniffed. It wasn’t fair. This little bird used to hang around their home, foraging in the garden Mama Taylor had grown. They liked hearing her singing and calling to the other birds.

Varyyn squeezed Liv’s shoulder. “We’ll give her a minute to see if she fades away on her own.  Do you trust us to do what’s kind for your friend?”

“Yeah… but I don’t want to leave her. I think she’s less scared with me holding her.”

Diego put an arm around Liv. “That’s good. You’re making her feel safe. Everyone deserves that. Just keep talking to her, okay? Hopefully, she’ll go peacefully.”

“It’s okay, birdie,” Liv whispered. “You’re not alone now. You can go to sleep.”

The bird gave a few more rattling breaths, then was still.

“Tio Diego… I think she’s died.”

“Yes, she’s gone, mija. You did amazing.”

Liv wept, held by her uncles.

“Death is always hard,” Varyyn said gently, “even when it’s kind. You always feel the hole where there was once a life.”

“S-she shouldn’t have died! She wasn’t hurting anyone… o-or doing anything wrong… she was just in that other bird’s way.”

“I know. It sad, and it’s not fair at all. But you made her last moments so much better; that counts for a lot. Everyone dies sometime… all you can hope for is that you go feeling loved, and you made that happen. It’s like… the circle of life. Nature can be really cruel, but that doesn’t take away the good bits. This little bird probably helped lots of plants spread their seeds.”

“Yes. Even if your friend’s life was short; it had great value.”

Liv raised her head, eyes wide. “Her body becomes the grass, right? Like Mufasa said? She’s got to at least get to be part of the circle of life if she can’t live anymore.”

“Yeah… yeah, that’s pretty much how it works. If we leave her body somewhere nice where it won’t be bothered, she can feed the earth.”

“Okay. I wanna do that, then.”

A sombre procession carried the little broken body to the edge of the meadow. Liv laid the bird beneath a bush and draped her body with a fallen leaf. Then, she sat and looked over the resting place of her friend, tears filling her eyes. Varyyn was right; already there was a big empty hole. An echoey feeling right in her heart. Liv would miss hearing the bird’s chirruping as she played around the garden with her Mama Taylor. Hopefully, she’d remember that, not just this sad, sad feeling… of knowing she couldn’t protect an innocent, of seeing a life fade to nothing. Mama Estela told her that was important. That nothing should ever take away what was beautiful about something or someone once they’re gone.

She got to her feet, brushed off the dirt from her hands, then slipped one into Diego’s.

Bye, bye.

  __________________________

La Huerta, 2033

“Penny for yours?”

Estela sat down beneath an old familiar banana tree, settling beside Taylor, who appeared to be a million miles away.

“Oh… I was off in my own world, wasn’t I?”

“Yes, it looks that way. But you looked happy.”

“I am. Just being here has been a breath of fresh air. I feel like I’m me again, and it’s been a long time coming.”

Estela gave a contented hum and rested her head on her wife’s shoulder. “I’ve missed happy Taylor.”

“Well, thanks for sticking by and waiting out for her. Happy Taylor appreciates it.” Taylor chuckled at the sound of Estela’s quiet laughter. It was infectious. Hell, just Estela’s smile was like the embodiment of sunshine, it made coming out the other side of her dark cloud all the more glorious. “I think we’ve got our Livi back. Or I think we’re on the right track.”

“I know we are. It’s been a slow decline… I don’t think I even realised how miserable she’d gotten until I saw her snap back to how she should be.” Estela shrank in on herself. What excuse did she have? She had one job; to keep that kid happy. She didn’t have a war to contend with, or the struggle to get by between pay-checks, and she still couldn’t manage it. “I should have done better. I’ve been trying… I’ve been trying so hard… but somehow I couldn’t make everything better for her. Or you.”

“Don’t you even think about it! No.” Taylor pressed a fierce kiss to Estela’s temple. “We hit a few bumps in the road, that’s all. I wasn’t counting on an intense case of the baby blues… or what might actually have been full-on post-partum depression. The timing was unfortunate; really, it sucked. But you carried us through. When Liv got suspended and I couldn’t fucking stop crying because I just couldn’t handle it, you did handle it. You’re pretty great. Ask Raj; he gave me a magic pep talk earlier, I’m sure I could rope him into a repeat performance.”

“Thank you. You’re good at putting things in perspective, I’ll give you that. I know I set my bar too high. Just because Liv has her struggles, doesn’t mean I’ve failed… it means she’s a human being. And that’s probably what we were aiming for….”

Taylor giggled. “Godammit, my otherworldly influence has been foiled!”

“Actually, while we’ve got a chance to talk… I was speaking with Aleister earlier.”

“Yeah, I thought I saw you two hanging out.”

“Well, it seems like we’ve inspired him and Grace. Reggie’s not going back to that school next year either. It sounds like Livi’s gonna have a homeschooling buddy here on La Huerta!”

“Oh, wow! Ohmygod, that’s perfect! It’ll be just like old times; almost half the gang back home again. And… and the girls? Are they waiting a year, or are they going to teach them as well?”

“You’ll have to ask them, but it sounds like they’re going to get started with Erin and Immy. It’s going to be so good for Liv.”

“Yeah. Really that’s… that’s wonderful. God, I’m so happy right now!”

Estela found herself laughing. Her dork was back. She took Taylor’s hand. “And then, moving forward, Aleister says they’re considering a permanent move to San Trobida-- obviously under the assumption that we’ll be heading in that direction ourselves.”

“Oh my… holy crap!” Taylor flung her arms around Estela and hugged her tight. Something in her knew right away… yes, that’s right. That’s where we’re all meant to be. That gut feeling overshadowed any qualms or fears. “Tio Nicolas is really not gonna know what’s hit him, hey?”

“No; and I think it will be a dream come true.” Nestled in Taylor’s embrace, the scent of her mingling with the La Huerta sea air… it was, to Estela, the very essence of happiness. The excited yells of children at play had her look up over her lover’s arms; there was her Livita, piggybacking little Erin through the shallows while the terror, Immy, sent up wild splashes of water at their faces. It was time to try something new. For them.

“Aw, ‘Stel, just look at them!” Taylor snuggled in, a giddy grin on her face. She needed a change, and she had a feeling that for her, for Estela, for Liv… it would be a step towards their best lives. The year to come, and even beyond that, was to be a thrill ride of the most exhilarating kind, and they’d take it on hand in hand. She exhaled her fears and sadness, and let the wind carry them away. “I really love you,” she whispered.

“I love you too, Taylor. Forever.”

 _____________________

Midnight over the Celestial. Or rather, two minutes to midnight. The countdown to Liv’s tenth birthday was on, and the kids-- save for the two little ones who’d long been in bed-- were just about hanging onto the non-grumpy side of overtired.

Ten years. How could that even be? Taylor could see the years in her face and Estela’s, but it still could have been yesterday that they were interrupting the festivities with the announcement that… ‘uh, I think baby might be coming’. What had followed was a period of some of the most intense hours either of them had lived through, a culmination of two lives’ dreams and emotions. And at the end of it, Taylor had found herself holding in her hands the second love of her life. Her sunshine. As children do, Liv grew. She’d tested her mothers, putting pressure on their weak points and making them stronger. She’d brought them closer, something Taylor wouldn’t have believed possible… but sharing their daughter’s journey was like watching a miracle unfold; to be touched and changed was inevitable.

Michelle joined Taylor, a knowing look on face as they watched Liv’s impatient jiggling.

“Crazy night ten years ago… my one and only midwife job.”

Taylor chuckled. “Crazy, crazy night. The best night of my life. I don’t think I’m ever going to stop thanking you for getting us through.”

“Oh, you’re very welcome. Ten years on, it’s stuck with me. It’s amazing to see the young woman she’s growing into. I’m not going to lie, I’m proud of my small part in putting her in the world.”

That change was coming so fast. The transition from that rosy-faced bundle of cuddles into a bright, opinionated adolescent was going to be underway in no time at all. Even now, looking at that giggling ten-year-old, it was hard to imagine.

I’m going to embrace every moment. Every one. You, me, your Mama Estela, we’re on this adventure together. And I can’t wait to see where it takes us next.

Estela put her arms around Taylor from behind, smiling into her wife’s shoulder.

“Is it my birthday yet?” Liv asked, bounding over to them.

“One minute, mija.” She tugged Liv into the hug and covered her forehead in kisses. “Come here!”

The cake was unveiled, and the small girls, Isla, Erin and Immy, erupted into ‘ooh’s, while Liv did a dance in her mothers’ arms. Her family around her sang, all together, celebrating her milestone, and she knew belonging. She looked up to her mothers and grinned, face aglow with candlelight.

The future was bright.

[s-trawberryv-eins]

The Birthday

NOT MY GIF

The Birthday

Summary: Caroline Stark died in the snap that wiped out half of the population of the universe. She died two months before her 21st birthday. She was brought back to life in the October after what would've been her 26th. On the evening of what should be her 27th birthday, she feels as though she doesn't know who she should be anymore.

Warnings: Angst, loneliness, swearing. Not as sad as it seems though!

Please read here before reading!

Stark!OC x avengers

Word count: 3308

The Caroline Stark Series Masterlist

AUGUST 11th, 2024

AVENGERS COMPOUND

UPSTATE NEW YORK

As she lay with her head in Pepper’s lap, she made no effort to fight the hot tears that built up in her chocolate brown eyes. Delicate fingers worked through soft hair that spilled across her lap. Watching the girl with a look of heartbreak in her eyes, a sigh fell from Peppers lips.

“Please talk to me, baby.” Pleading with the girl in front of her, she felt at a loss. Having her daughter come back from the dead was a miracle; something she'd lost all hope for in the first few months after the snap. It never occurred to her the trauma Caroline now carried on her shoulders, however. Here they were, Caroline laying with her adoptive mother, sobs wracking her body on the eve of her birthday.

“How old am I, Momma?” Caroline had asked an hour earlier when she arrived at the Stark women’s quarters from the lab. Peppers heart broke for the girl, distress written clearly on every one of her delicate features. The woman said nothing, instead she simply sat on the couch and opened her arms wide for her daughter.

As it drew closer to midnight, the eldest Stark daughter couldn’t find the energy to be excited. She couldn't find the want to be excited. Tear stained cheeks red and puffy, eyes sore and bloodshot, the Potts woman wracked her brain for a way to cheer her daughter up, and perhaps salvage her birthday even the slightest bit.

“Am I 20 or am I 26? Because there’s a big difference, you know?” Stuttering through her speech, she couldn’t catch her breath. “Do you remember what we had planned for my 21st? Me, you, and Dad were gonna go to Coney Island? Fairground rides and hot dogs and a bonfire on the beach?"

“Yes, and then you were going to see Amelie and the others, and pretend it was your first-time drinking.” A sly smile crossed Pepper’s face as her daughters’ eyes widened comically.

“Dad promised he wouldn’t tell!”

“Tony knew?!” The brief silence quickly dissolved into giggles as the two women recalled the memories fondly.

-

“I know it’s last minute, but it’s really important!” Pepper spoke with equal parts frustration and excitement as she worked to pull her thoughts together. Caroline had long since fallen asleep on the couch, a blanket placed delicately over her sleeping form. After the less than cheery conversation the two shared, the CEO decided she knew exactly how to cheer the girl up.

“Barnes, I swear to all that’s holy this had better work!” Setting her phone down on the coffee table, she headed off to bed, knowing tomorrow would be a roller coaster of a day.

-

AUGUST 12th, 2024

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAROLINE” The loud girlish scream startled Caroline awake. Propping herself up on her elbows, Pepper met her eyes, offering her a sympathetic smile. Morgan, upon deciding she was simply not close enough, hopped up on to the sofa, all but climbing on top of her sister. A blinding smile and a big cuddle from the youngest Stark wasn’t a bad way to start the morning, Caroline thought to herself.

“Thankyou, baby.” Planting a kiss on her head, the scientist reached for her mother, who wasted no time in joining the sisters in their cuddle.

“We’ve got a surprise waiting for you in the kitchen.” Trying to muster up some enthusiasm was proving to be difficult, so she plastered on a fake smile and headed upstairs to change. Despite the early August sun shining down without relent, she pulled on a black sports bra and leggings, and threw her favourite black cropped jumped on over the top. Comfort over anything else, she decided. Jogging back downstairs, Morgan grabbed her sister’s hand and tugged her firmly in the direction of the communal kitchen.

Much to her relief, it was almost empty. As the three Stark ladies entered the room, they were greeted by FRIDAY, and Bucky Barnes.

“Good morning, Caroline! Happy birthday!" Thanking the AI, she placed Morgan on one of the kitchen stools before trying and failing to catch the Winter Soldiers attention, too engrossed in whatever he was cooking.

“I need to head to my office for a little while. Will you two be okay?” Kissing each of the girls on the forehead, they watched silently as their mother went off to work.

“Bye, Momma” Morgan piped up when Pepper was definitely out of earshot, earning a look of confusion from Caroline. “Uh…Uncle Buck?” Watching the soldier with entertainment, she reached out with tiny hands to grab a handful of napkins, throwing them haphazardly in his direction.

“UNCLE BUCK!” Spinning on his heels, cheeks flushed red and a lazy smile on his face, Morgan waved innocently. Receiving a wink and a high five from the soldier, a smile broke out across her face before she pointed at her sister. “It's sissy’s birthday.” The bluntness of her statement made him chuckle, but he simply nodded and motioned for the doctor to join him.

“Morning, Sergeant. What're you cooking?" As she rounded the corner of the island to have a nosy, he pulled her in for a sideways hug. Relishing in the feeling of being close to him, she hummed softly as he pressed a kiss to her hair.

“Happy birthday, doll. Pep told me that Tony always made pancakes on the day of; not that I've ever seen the man cook." A ghost of a smile appeared on her lips, the memory painfully bittersweet. The Winter Soldiers gesture left her heart fluttering and she made no effort to stop herself as she threw her arms around his middle.

“Thankyou, Bucky. It means more than you can know.” His surprised demeanour soon softened as he returned the embrace. Not feeling is necessary to respond with words, instead the sergeant tightened his grip on the girl, the pair enjoying the feeling of being so close.

“Smells like burning.” Morgan’s nose wrinkled as she inhaled deeply, her nonchalant comment sending the soldier into a panic.

“Your big sister distracted me!” Caroline rolled her eyes fondly but took her seat next to Morgan all the same, the moment being well and truly over.  Bucky plated up two portions of pancakes, toppings already set out before their arrival.

“Here you go! I’ve gotta run some errands with Sam, but I’ll catch you in a bit, yeah?” Sending a warm smile in the girls’ direction, he hurried out of the room. The sinking feeling of disappointment hit Caroline only briefly before her sister turned to face her.

"Are you and Uncle Bucky gonna get married?” taking the scientist entirely by surprise, Caroline struggled as a mouth full of pancake lodged itself in her throat awkwardly. After composing herself, she turned to meet her sisters’ eye.

“Where on earth did that come from?” The look on the youngest Stark’s face was one of complete innocence, as if she’d asked about the weather and not her sisters relationship status.

“You and Uncle Buck. You hug a lot and he makes your face red.” Pressing her hands to her cheeks, the doctor felt them grow warm as Morgan spoke. "Like that!” Shoving more food in her mouth, she tried to steady her heartbeat.

“If you must know, your uncle has made it quite clear that we are only friends. Now finish your food.” Throwing a piece of fruit at the small girl, she made it as obvious as she could that the topic was closed, despite the smile on Morgan’s face.

-

“FRIDAY, where’s momma?” The Stark girls had spent all morning in each other’s company,  wandering the compound and causing chaos, but they found that they were alone; with the exception of agents and officials they didn’t really know. Being a Stark had its benefits; Caroline had free reign of the compound, and the pair found that those that did catch them doing something they shouldn't were far more lenient upon realising who they were.

“She’s not here, Miss Morgan. Mrs Potts-Stark had to run a few errands. She’ll be home by 4.” A frown etched itself on to Caroline’s face, disappointed by her mother’s disappearance.

“Who is home then?” The AI created by Tony was all but a mind reader. It didn't matter how vaguely she was addressed, she always seemed to know what the team needed. Knowing that 'who' meant the team specifically, and ‘home’ meant their private living quarters, the AI responded immediately.

“Nobody, I’m afraid. It seems everybody is taking advantage of the peacetime, Miss Stark.”

Turning away from her sister with a huff, tears pricked at her eyes and that all too familiar lump formed in her throat. Yes, she’d requested her birthday remain a small, private affair, low key and homely. She hadn’t however, realised that this meant she’d be completely forgotten about. The sour taste in her mouth that appeared when she thought about this god-awful day was borne of confusion and grief and uncertainty. The last thing she wanted was to be completely alone.

As if sensing the shift in the room, Morgan took a gentle hold of Caroline hand, and began her trip across the green that separated the living quarters from her lab and workshop. The youngest Stark had access to the lab providing she was with an authorised adult; the measure had been taken after small hands had caused a rather large explosion when unsupervised - nobody was hurt, luckily.

Upon arriving in the lab, it took less than two seconds for Morgan to request her usual. “Do the suit.” Her statement offered no room for questioning, so Caroline planted her feet firmly on the pads in the corner of the room. Morgan watched with glee as the nanotech supersuit quickly covered every inch of Caroline’s body, travelling from the ground upwards. Inspired heavily by the Iron Man suit, she had used her fathers nanotech mark to create a stealth suit of her own. It lacked rocket launchers and the ability to fly, and she had changed the colour scheme somewhat; charcoal black with the iconic red of her father’s suit highlighting detail.

The changes were made to prove to everybody  - the public, the team, herself – that she is not taking his place; there would only ever be one Iron Man.

"You look like Daddy!” Awe poured out of her eyes, as if the sight before her was the most magical she'd ever seen. The comment hit Caroline straight in the heart, pride and love shining in her eyes.

The two played and tinkered for hours, loneliness only creeping back in that evening as the sun began to disappear. Morgan appeared restless, sighing and studying the clock on the wall with resolve, despite her inability to correctly tell the time.

“Miss Morgan, the little hand just hit 4.” Jumping to her feet, the smallest brunette yanked the goggles from her eyes, tossing them to the ground.

“We gotta go, Care!” Furrowed brows and delayed reactions caused Morgan to huff loudly. “I want juice pops, we gotta go!" Taking a stance behind her sister, Morgan began to push her sister with as much strength as she could muster.

“Okay, okay! I’m going! Stop pushing!” Failing to scold the child as she’d already raced off ahead of her, Caroline sighed, but picked up her pace all the same. Hearing the automatic doors open, Caroline ran faster, wanting to stop her sister from running off without her.

“Morgan! You can't just run off like that!" The two girls stood just outside the building, on the edge of the green. Only interested in her sister’s safety, Caroline hadn't yet taken in the change of scenery. "I was scared-" her words died on her tongue as she looked out around them.

The large expanse of grass had been transformed into what appeared to be a fairground. Fairy lights lit up the surrounding area, revealing a ferris wheel, and merry-go-round, and several other rides that sparked a heavy feeling of nostalgia in her heart. A popcorn machine and a hot dog stand and a fire pit with huge cushions and blankets surrounding it.

“What is this? Mo?” Her voice a breathless whisper as she spoke, tears pricking her eyes once again.

“It’s your birthday, baby.” A voice startled her, she spun around to find her mother and the rest of the team waiting. Her family.

“I KNEW ALL ABOUT IT.” Morgan made sure everybody knew about her part in the plan, the most important, she announced.

“Sorry for leaving you all day. We received instructions for mission not-so-impossible at two am.” Clint explained their absence with a bright smile on his face.

“We weren’t about to argue with Momma Stark here” Sam added with a wink. As she took in the overwhelming scene before her, she couldn’t stop the tears rolling down her cheeks. Two pairs of arms appeared around her, giggles filled her ears.

“Come on,” Wanda whispered, Nat smiling happily next to her.

“We made you your own Coney Island. Let’s go have fun.” Holding on to her two friends for a second or two more, she nodded her head, taking their hands in hers.

-

After 5 hours of candy floss and helter-skelter filled fun, the night had started to settle down. The group found themselves gathered around the fire pit, sharing drinks, snacks, and stories. The ‘adults’ – Pepper, Rhodey, Happy, and May – were ready to turn in for the night, only to find that Peter, MJ, and Morgan were perched a few feet off the ground in a hammock that Peter had cleverly created for youngest Stark, who was completely enamoured by her 'big brother’ and his spider-talent.

The Avengers were scattered about the pit, little conversations of all varieties taking place. Caroline, Wanda, and Sam were discussing an upcoming mission in Bucharest; Nat and Clint were taking turns trying to get Banners other half to join the party; Bucky and Steve were studying Steve’s phone as they tried to figure out how to queue a song that they liked.

“All I’m saying is, the four of us-“

“Stop saying that! There are three of us going on this mission!”

“Redwing is as much a member of this team as you or me, Maximoff. Don’t you forget it” Sam’s sassy response sent Caroline into a fit of giggles. After a few drinks, Sam became one of the girls; his snappy comebacks, bratty attitude, and overall lack of tolerance for anybody’s shit was impossibly entertaining. It definitely helped that the rest of them had a slight buzz too - even the super soldiers, thanks to Thor’s constant supply of Asgardian strength alcohol.

The warmth of the fire and the soft glow of the fairy lights brought a feeling of contentment to Caroline’s heart as she tuned out of her conversation to look around. She truly felt as though she was at home.

-

The fire had started to die down. Pepper had taken Morgan to bed, and Happy had taken May and Peter back to Queens. Steve, Banner, and Rhodey had also taken their leave, bidding the group good night and wishing Caroline a last happy birthday. The others stayed out, the drinks continued to flow, and the conversation did too. Natasha sat huddled in between Stark and Maximoff, the three exchanging private giggles and whispers, a conversation the boys were not privy to. As they discussed Caroline’s most recent (god awful) date, a very wobbly Bucky Barnes appeared in front of them, hastily shoving Natasha out the way to sit next to the birthday girl.

“Hey cutie.” After she’d stopped laughing, Wanda pulled her friend up and yanked her elsewhere, giving Barnes some time with Caroline.

“Hey Buck.” Beaming up at him, her mind flew to Morgan’s earlier comments. She’d long since accepted the fact that Bucky didn’t want her, but she couldn’t help the butterflies that refused to settle in her stomach when he was near.

“Sorry for running off so quick this morning. I wanted to stay, but these heroes needed my help setting up.” Shaking her head with a giggle, she insisted that he need not apologise, the pancakes were wonderful, and she managed with Morgan.

“I hear Morgan was asking questions?” His tone was teasing but his words tore the smile right off her face.

“Oh, uh – yeah,” she cringed as she spoke “I put her right though. Don’t worry.” Refusing to make eye contact, she missed the look of disappointment that passed over his features. Rubbing his hands on his thighs, Barnes sighed.

“Really messed up there, didn’t I?” Caroline’s head snapped up, brows furrowed. Bucky caught Natasha’s eye and nodded, which she took as a signal to drag everyone inside discreetly to give the two some privacy.

“What does that mean?” The Sergeant winced at the harsh edge to her tone, Hope dwindled in her eyes, along with uncertainty and fear. He’d broken her heart before, and she was impossibly sure that he could do it again if he wanted. “Bucky?”

“I was so cruel, that day in your lab. I never even apologised.” Now it was his turn to avoid her eyes. Her heart ached as she recalled the day he spoke of. "Didn't even say sorry. Because I am, Care. I am so sorry.” It’d never really crossed her mind. After their argument, she’d avoided him for a few days, trying to give herself space to heal. Things slowly returned to normal (especially after Bucky broke things off with his girlfriend), as if there'd been an unspoken agreement to forget about the whole ordeal.

Forcing a small smile and a nod seemed to be all she could manage to do. Nothing was said for a few moments, and whilst the silence wasn’t awkward, she did want to draw out her time with Bucky. Gently leaning into him, he picked up on the hint and let his flesh arm wind over her shoulder, covering them both with a blanket as he did so. Readjusting slightly, she positioned herself so that her back was against his chest, the two sat with legs stretched out on the giant cushions.

“So then, birthday girl. Did you decide how old you are?" His voice was a whisper, lips just barely grazing the shall of her ear. Inhaling sharply, she let herself fall deeper into his embrace, his arm shifting from the girl’s shoulder to sit firmly on her waist. The feeling left her dizzy, and she fought to compose herself. Letting her head fall back onto his shoulder, she closed her eyes.

“Yes actually, I did." Pausing to think for a moment, she searched for the right words; a challenge considering the tipsy haze making words difficult to find. Bucky simply waited for her answer. Pepper had explained her feelings, and he knew not to rush her.

“I’m 21. I’ve lost so much. Thanos took so much. I don’t think I should have to lose this too.” For the first time, the Stark girl didn’t feel like crying when talking about it.

“Well in that case –“ the softest of kisses was pressed to the side of her head “happy 21st birthday, Caroline.” Pulling herself from the soldier’s grip, she turned to face him. Just before she could open her mouth to respond, a loud crash followed by an eruption of drunken giggles sounded from behind them. Letting her forehead fall sharply against Bucky’s shoulder, he just chuckled and turned around to see what the commotion was.

Sam, Wanda, Clint, and Natasha were rolling around on the floor in their laughter, right next to a fallen popcorn machine. With a fond sigh, Bucky stood up and offered his hand to Caroline, pulling her up to join their friends.

It had truly been a tremendous birthday.

TAGS: @hailqueenconquer​

[levi-ish]

Little Talks | 5

Pairing: Bartender!Levi X Reader

Genre: [+18] Slice of life, drama, romance, fluff, smut

Words: 5k

Warnings: Alcohol, cheating mentions, drugs, cussing

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

Masterlist

“Your taste in tea is shit” Levi scanned through the old teabags you had lingering in your cabinets.

“Sorry if I don’t have enough money to buy those fancy blends you like” you rolled your eyes as you leaned further into the throw pillows you had on top of your old couch.

“Tch.”

You turned around and watched the man tumble around with your mugs and you knew that he hated your unmatching sets, always making small comments about them. He then set for the most common ones you had and brought them to you after quickly making your drinks.

It had been a few weeks since the night when Levi comforted you after your ex-beloved’s visit. You two held hands and pretended that it was nothing while watching random cooking shows, then after you fell asleep he left but not before making you another cup of tea that you woke up to find inside your microwave, sitting there waiting for you.

You thanked him in person two days after and exchanged numbers because he claimed that he didn’t ‘trust’ your building’s security. Even when you told him that Zeke only got up because your concierge knew him.

But now things were better than you could expect. Levi would drive you home almost every night and wait for your ‘ok’ text when you took the elevator, to be sure you were safe and sound. He mostly made you tea at 4AM when the bar was closing and you had no classes the day after, and you two hung around at your apartment quite a lot, watching shitty movies and listening to him complain about how you were doing your laundry all wrong.

Whoever saw you two together would think you were a couple of elderlies married.

“I can’t believe he didn’t like how she plated it” you pointed at the TV, quite angry at the cooking show passing on. “She even put those fancy herbs.”

“It’s shit”

“Everything is ‘shit’ to you” you rolled your eyes.

“Only the things that are shit” Levi replied as he sipped on his tea.

You rolled eyes once more as you felt the shift on the sofa, not noticing his movements if it weren’t for it. Levi held his phone to his eyes and a sheer of light illuminated his strong features, highlighting that glorious jawline and the thin lips you—

What?

Shaking your head, you quickly got rid of those thoughts, adjusting your own position and making your back fall more comfortably on the cushions. Levi let a small sigh and brought the teacup back to his mouth, drinking slowly.

“Hange again?” You asked, giving him the side of your eye as you stirred your own drink.

“Kirstein this time” Levi replied, letting out his signature ‘tch’. “I should’ve been there. Those idiots can’t do their jobs properly without supervision.”

“Hange forcing people to listen to their theories again?”

“No. Jean broke the sink and is trying to blame it on the weather somehow.”

“How…”

“No fucking idea.” Levi put his phone back inside his pocket and drank the last of his tea, sighing after. It was a heavenly vision to see, you weren’t gonna lie.

With a small yawn, you stretched your legs and downed the tea in one gulp, earning a side eye from the man who wasn’t pleased you were appreciating one of his fancy blends. The minty taste lingered on your tongue as you licked your lips, and you could smell the hint of cinnamon wandering in the room, mixing with Levi’s cologne that you so much adored.

“I’m bored” you let out, pouting as you rested your face on the pillow closer to his shoulder.

“You wouldn’t be if you stayed quiet and watched the show.”

“Do you hate me or what” you scoffed, pouting even more.

Levi turned to you, watching your expression and that’s when you noticed how close you were to him. His breath fanned over your face and you swore you could see his lips twitching and him inching closer, clearing your throat, you looked down, completely breaking eye contact.

“Do you really wanna know?” He replied and you pushed him. “At least clean your hands before touching me.”

“You wish I was touching you” you bit your lip and rose your brows teasingly.

He turned to your face once more, eyes dead serious focusing on you and he licked his lips slowly, posture completely changing.

“Maybe.”

He caught you off guard with that comment, making a small shiver go down your spine, but you decided that brushing it off would be better than acknowledging new reasons to make the relationship you two had more uncomfortable. You knew Levi wasn’t very pushy about things and probably would forget about it as soon as you would, without giving it another thought.

Oh well.

“Uh…” you tried to say, licking your lips again after your mouth went full dry “… are you hungry?”

“No” he said, eyes still on you as you tried to get his attention away from you.

“Uhm… then do you wanna do something else or…?”

Levi inched closer now, his nose brushing against yours and breath warming your chin as you rubbed skin together, feeling each other scents and every little movement was big enough to make both bodies swarm under the tension in the room.

“Levi… what…”

But before you could continue, he closed the distance, lips colliding as you felt the dry specs of his chapped skin brushing against yours. Is this really happening? What…? It was, and he was still going, hand now holding your nape to have your face closer to his than before, as if he never wanted to let go. You turned to the side to allow his tongue inside, feeling it dancing with yours in a difficult and shy but intense tango that seemed too familiar but strange at the same time.

It was a sensation you never wanted to end.

But as soon as it started, it stopped; his hand left your neck and went back to his side, and his usually unfazed look now seemed more panicked, as if he was already regretting it.

Please, god, don’t regret it. Please…

 “I—”

You were abruptly cut off by him standing from the couch and grabbing his coat by the rack, quickly opening the door and leaving your apartment, leaving you by yourself and with empty lips but a full heart that felt too heavy for your shallow chest.

Things changed since that.

Levi completely disappeared. Hange and Jean would say that he would leave the key to them and only showed up in the mornings to rearrange things the way he liked them but left very quickly each time. He didn’t text and you didn’t try to, knowing it would be useless since we are talking about him, most emotionally unavailable person to exist. You still went to the bar every night, trying to catch him around and maybe clear things up, but failed miserably.

You didn’t regret it, not at all. In fact, you wished it would last longer, even though it was enough material for your mind to wander around the floor full of eggshells that were your memories from that night. You wanted more, you wanted him, and now you weren’t ashamed of admitting it to yourself.

And you were almost giving up seeing him again, if it weren’t for Sasha, who was livid over how he had reacted and insisted on dragging you back to the bar.

So there you were, Mikasa holding one of your arms and Sasha holding the other, both giving you pep talks on how you should go there and confront him. You knew he was working tonight for sure, that’s because Mikasa told you she’d texted him about it before and learned he was taking some weird shifts and closing on weirder times. Annie was busy with her two-year anniversary with Armin, so she couldn’t come, but she did text you to be brave. The way Annie would, I mean, sending a small “punch him” and a smiley face.

“C’mon (y/n), you look hot and he will regret leaving when you show up” Sasha’s grip on your arm tightened as she tried to drag you inside. “Tell her, Mikasa”

“You look hot” the other woman said, and you knew that she wasn’t putting much effort in because it made you uncomfortable, otherwise you’d have been inside already since Mikasa was stronger than you two combined. “Levi’s an idiot.”

“I don’t wanna go” you said, whining as they let go of you for a moment. “He did what he did and I was pretty much rejected. I don’t wanna push harder.”

“What’s even his problem?!” Sasha crossed her arms, her expression turning into a mad one. “Was he always an idiot, Mikasa?”

“He changed a lot since he was left at the altar.”

“What” you and Sasha said in unison, shocked by the new piece of information.

“Did I never mention it?”

“No?” You frowned, coming closer to her face. “What do you mean by ‘left at the altar’?”

“Exactly that.”

“Mikasa” Sasha pushed her lightly.

“I don’t know exactly, I was 15, but he was getting married to this girl and she left him the day of the wedding.” Mikasa said as if it was nothing. “Everyone was there to see, and he was devastated.”

That left you wondering… a lot. Why’d Levi never tell you about that? You two went into some deep discussions at times, talking about stuff that you never dared to share with others, and he did open up a little about some of his things, but this? You thought that would be something to tell someone you would think of kissing. Unless he wasn’t really thinking those things about you, then it would be a whole other topic that you were too much of a coward to consider.

Did anyone else know? You had so many questions and you really wish you had the answers because of the anxiety now growing in the pit of your stomach.

“You didn’t think that was important information to share?” You questioned and Mikasa shook her head.

“Not really.”

“Okay, we are getting in. You can deal with that later” Sasha pushed you through the door and now you couldn’t say anything else because your feet already touched the wooden floor.

It was a full house, everyone was dancing and singing along with the old jukebox and there were girls leaning on the counter flirting with Jean as your eyes wandered. Hange was mixing drinks and Levi was nowhere to see, what made you feel a lot more comfortable being there. Sasha and Mikasa pushed through the crowd and found you a place on the counter, sitting on stools and leaving you to sit in between them, so you did, and the blonde bartender was the first one to notice you there.

“Ah!” He chirped loudly, leaving the girls behind to come to you. “My favorite girl… and company, hi, hello.”

You noticed he was now flirting with Mikasa, but she just ignored his presence.

“Hot wings!” Sasha punched the counter and grabbed you by side shoulder, pointing at the shelves. “And shots, keep them coming, my friend here needs them.”

“I’m sure she does” Jean kept his gaze on Mikasa, trying to be subtle about it as you rolled your eyes at him. “Our short friend has been pretty hard to deal with lately, so without you around I already knew something went down.”

“They kissed” Mikasa let out.

“ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT LEVI?” Screamed Hange from where they were, coming right away and pushing Jean with their hip. “Also, hi, but answer me!”

“They kissed” Mikasa repeated, and you gave up on trying to stop them.

Hange’s hand fell on your shoulder as they approached the group further, inserting the ponytail-head in the middle and readjusting the glasses above their nose, “You and shorty? Are you kidding me?! Tell me everything!”

“I’ll leave you to deal with Hange now” Jean said as they leaned a little more into Mikasa’s side. “So… are you in college?”

She only gave him a side glance and ignored his question, making the man confused.

“Focus!” Hange slammed their fist, now sitting on your side. “You have to tell me about it!”

“Oh gosh, please let me breath!” You rose your hands and they all moved their attention to you, making you feel a little overwhelmed and guilty — they were simply curious creatures. A deep sigh left your mouth as you put your palms back on the wooden surface of the table, opening your eyes slowly. “We kissed… and he left.”

“Without saying anything?” Jean asked and you nodded. “Damn… he ghosted you.”

“He might just be too busy?” Hange suggested and you gave them the harsh glare. “Maybe not?”

“Can anyone bring me—us some wings?” Sasha pleaded, leaning onto the table.

“You two need to talk” Hange added, bumping onto you jokingly. “Kiss and make up.”

“That’s not happening.”

“C’mon, he’s in the back. I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you.”

You just lowered your head and that was enough for them to understand.

“Well, I’ll leave you be” they just gave you a slight nod and stood from the booth. “Good luck.”

You felt some warmth crawl into your belly and smiled at them, following by another glance onto the other two in front of you.

“Mikasa is such an exotic name, where did it come from?” Jean leaned further, trying his best to sound smooth but the girl’s reaction was too bothered to be working.

“We’ll leave you be” Hange said as they grabbed Jean by the nape and dragged him back to the bar.

   Sasha was on her third plate of hot wings when caught the first glance of Levi.

He came from the back for a moment to grab the electric kettle from under the counter, turning around quickly as if he already knew you were around and was avoiding any type of contact. Being treated like a disease like that made you feel angry, it wasn’t like you’d done anything wrong, you just kissed him back — he was the one to initiate it! The nerve of him.

You gulped down the rest of your beer and threw yourself back on the cushions of the booth, earning a look from Mikasa, but she decided to ignore it knowing you were procrastinating the inevitable, now focusing on Sasha who was unbuttoning her pants to eat more.

“Hey, you’re (y/n), right?” Someone approached your table, hands filling the pockets of their letterman jacket and blonde hair neatly sitting on top of his head. A thin goatee painted his chin and a gentle look sat around his clear eyes.

“Yea” you shook your head, looking at his face, frowning slightly. “Sorry, I—”

“It’s fine, we have Latin together” you now recognized him as the boy who sat in front of you and occasionally borrowed a pen.

“Oh! Reiner, right? You want some hot wings?” Sasha was not pleased you offered, but you just ignored her growl.

“No, I’m fine, just came to say ‘hi’” he gave you a small smile. “See you around.”

You reciprocated the smile and watched as he left, and your eyes collided with cold, grey ones across the room, behind the wooden counter as you felt your heart rush again, as if it was the first time once more. Levi had his muscular arms crossed as he stared right into your soul, making cold chills run all over your spine, holding your body to make it stop.

He turned around to leave and as if a lightning had just struck in you, your body involuntarily stood from its place and rushed to the counter, running around it and pushing the backdoor open, revealing an annoyed short man holding a cup of tea.

“What the f—”

And before he could even complete his thoughts, you grabbed the cup and placed it on the table right next to you, all that before pining him roughly against the wall, staring quickly into his eyes, searching for the same flame you could see inside you now burning around grey specs. A small smile grew on your lips and you kissed him hard.

He hesitated though, leaning back quickly as if something had snapped in his mind, making him realize what was really happening there. But before you could react again, he turned you around, pining your hands above your head as he kissed you feverously, the other hand feeling the skin of your hips from under your shirt, making the chills go harder around your bloodstream.

Levi moved positions once more, taking the back of your thighs and sitting you on top of the same table, making the teacup fall to the floor, but he seemed unbothered by it. His tongue now made advances on your mouth, playing with yours in soft movements even when his own lips made harsh movements, combining everything like sugar and cinnamon, and the pine scent of his cologne invaded your clothes that were now too hot for your needy skin.

His hands clenched around the fat of your legs, holding it as if his life depended on it and he started to lower his lips to your neck, giving it open-mouthed kisses that made a small moan fall from your throat. Ashamed, you didn’t realize that your grip on his shoulders was a little too hard and he put a hand from under your chin, holding your face as he stared deeply into your soul. A satisfied scoff fell from his own plump lips and he came back to what he was doing.

That was somewhat a dream, something you had fantasized about too many times to count, and now that it was happening, you refused to pinch yourself in fear of waking up alone. But when his slim fingers rose your skirt to your hips, things felt too real for it to be just your mind playing tricks. Small whimpers escaped your mouth as Levi decided to explore around your navel, playing softly with the hem of the lacy panties you were wearing, and you thanked whatever god was up there for not wearing those comfortable ones you almost wore tonight.

He removed your panties and lowered himself now, a small breath fanned over your naked parts, making you shiver slightly, only to be held still by his own hands. He gave you a small glance before you nodded in consent, and it was all it took for him to devour you in the most amazing ways you had never experienced before.

Levi had experience — you could tell — and the passion he exhaled was enough for you to moan without caring about anything in the world. His fingers joined his tongue and played with your entrance, teasing slowly as his mouth did wonders around your sensitive bud, movements going from harsh hands to slow kisses that left you whimpering, needing everything, anything more from him, legs hooping around his shoulders while trying to make him come closer to your heat.

You whimpered, moaned, cried under his spell, and everything felt 1000x more sensitive against his touch. His fingers entered you and played around all the right places, hitting every beat to the song that played muffled inside the bar, making a small giggle fall from you and he noticed it, now fastening his pace as if he wanted to go back to shutting you up with his own mouth.

Repeatedly he hit your most sensitive spot, licking, and tasting all he could as he did his best to make you cum. It didn’t take long for you to feel the heat pooling around your stomach, throwing your head backwards and fisting his hair between your fingers as you felt his rush against your orgasm, taking everything from you simply with his mouth. You moaned loudly as you rode his face quickly, hips moving without your consent and he pulled your lips apart to clean the remnants of your pleasure, not leaving one spot untouched.

Your chest heaved from the rush as your eyes made contact with grey seas that now leveled with your height, watching you under spells of lust while he sucked slowly from his fingers, tasting every last bit of you, like you were mead for his tastebuds, and you could swear you saw his lips curl a little upwards.

“You surely know how to make a mess” he noted, a ‘tch’ leaving his mouth.

--

TAGLIST

@zeickv @thirstyforsometea​​

[builder051]

Prompt for you, I hope you find it interesting (if not, please feel free to decline): Peter sees a corpse up close for the first time in a battle and gets kind of shocked and throws up, Tony tries to make him feel better. Thank you!

This is fairly similar to one I’ve already done, but also slightly different, so again I’m unable to tell if you requested this because you read and liked the other one, or if you haven’t seen the other one yet.  This particular topic isn’t my cup of tea right now, so I’m going to paste the other fic below (obvious warning for death talk).

_____

The kid’s as good as frozen as the team files back onto the jet.  They’re all relieved to be leaving the scene.  They won, but it’s the kind of victory that leaves enough carnage behind to still feel like a loss.  The fact that the city hall building still stands at the end of the block in nowhereville, Pennsylvania doesn’t mean a lot when you’ve watched a woman bleed out on the sidewalk beside you.  Especially when your webs caught all the bullets in the round except that one.

Steve watches as Peter walks up to a window seat and stops.  His glazed eyes fix on the little care package the flight crew left on the chair.  The kid sorely needs a bottle of water and a protein bar, but he seems incapable of even moving the insulated bag so he can sit down.

Tony comes up behind the kid and puts a hand on his shoulder.  It’s meant to be a comforting gesture, but Peter sags under its weight.  His shoulders hunch forward, and his knees start to buckle.  The stumble seems to bring him to his senses.  Peter sits, and Tony continues to stand over him for a moment, his mouth slightly open.

Steve’s been on the receiving end of exchanges like that before.  His own father lovingly roughing him up a little, either too optimistic or too oblivious about his son’s state of health.  He fully understands why Tony lets out a quiet sigh and turns to take his own seat across the aisle.  Steve feels a little bad for his own father too.

The jet prepares for takeoff, and the automated voice over the intercom tells the team to fasten their seatbelts.  Peter stays stiff.  He doesn’t even move his head to subconsciously look for the disembodied speaker.  Even the team members who have grown up with technology still have the instinct.

Steve gets to his feet.  He changes rows in two steps and slides into the seat beside Peter.  “Hey,” Steve whispers.  He secures his seatbelt, then reaches to help the kid.  “Just gonna buckle you in, ok?”

Peter blinks.  Exhales.  Steve takes it as a positive that the kid doesn’t protest.  But then he swipes his fist under his eye and mutters, “What’s the point?”

Peter’s voice is so quiet that his tone’s hard to pin down.  There isn’t outright anger.  Maybe a hint of petulance, but no fire.  Sadness, but no tears.  The kid sounds hopeless.

No matter what Steve says, it’s not going to be what Peter wants to hear.  Steve’s supposed to be good at reaching people.  His stint as the star-spangled man with a plan gave Steve a memory bank full of one-liners meant to incite pep and enthusiasm.  America’s public schools seem to think people will still listen to him, that they’ll come out on the other end of a 15-minute video with renewed motivation to be good citizens.  But high schoolers are tough customers, and the videos are bullshit.  Even Steve knows that.

Peter moves his jaw around.  He presses his lips together.  The kid’s whole face is trembling a little.  He gives Steve a microscopic glance, then drops his eyes back to his lap.

Too much time has passed.  Steve’s blown his chance to give a meaningful response.  Anything he does now is going to seem calculated and desperate.  Which it will be anyway, but he’d held onto a shred of hope that Peter wouldn’t notice.

But who’s he kidding?  Peter’s fifteen.  Adult enough to want to stay out till midnight, but too nervous to open the door to pay the pizza man.  His world revolves around video games and science tests.  He trusts his teachers and his mentors.  He doesn’t want them to lie to him, and he can tell when they do.

Peter’s a normal kid.  Avengers be damned.  He should be worrying about homework and movie dates.  International politics should be something he sees on TV, not unfolding in violence right before his eyes.  If he even chooses to care about the news.

Peter is the type to care, though.  It takes him a tick above his classmates.  He’s quiet kid at the back of the gym who only pretends to roll his eyes when the instructional video ends.  He doesn’t need Captain America to talk to him about integrity; he already has it.  At this moment, he has more than Steve does.

Steve sighs.  It’s the same sound Tony made.  He’s in the same place now, caught between a lie and a let-down.  “There isn’t one,” Steve finally says.  “Seatbelts are just some kind of required standard.”  SHIELD’s aircraft are too smooth to need the restraints.  They even have stabilizers specifically for aerial combat.

It’s yet another thing that separates them from mere mortals, the people who ride on clunky commercial planes, who don’t have body armor to protect them from random acts of violence.  Steve regrets steering the conversation that way, but instead of feeling guilt, he’s washed in relief when the tear rolls down Peter’s cheek.

“I just…” the kid breathes.  “I never…”  He shakes his head, the motion slight at first, then rapid, as if he’s jostling his thoughts into focus.  Or maybe out of focus.  “I fucked up.”

Steve doesn’t hear the curse, or even the sentence.  He zeros in on the hitch in Peter’s voice and the sobs visibly swelling in his chest.  The dam is breaking, and Steve has to let it.  The best he can do is hold on and weather the flood.

“No,” Steve says, as gently and firmly as he can.  “You didn’t.”  He lays his palm flat over Peter’s forearm.  Flecks of dried blood crust the fabric of his suit.  Most people probably couldn’t distinguish them from the crimson material, but Steve can.  He knows Peter can too.  “You didn’t.”

“But I…” Peter gasps.  “There was one.  I missed one.”

There’s no way to mitigate it.  Missing one quiz question is still a good grade.  On the boardroom side of war, passes and failures are measured in much the same way: kill statistics organized as rights versus wrongs, friends versus foes.  But it doesn’t look that way to the soldiers on the ground.  Steve was too wrapped up in determination to find Bucky to remember the first time he’d fought with intent to kill, but he’s heard a lot of stories.  All of them have the same core.  Reality sets in with a rush of unfeelable feelings that turn primal and make people fight and flee and throw up.

“One.  I missed one,” Peter repeats on the gust of an exhale.  His breath’s coming unevenly.  Steve doesn’t want to tell the kid to calm down, but he’s going to hyperventilate.

“Peter, listen to me,” he starts.

“One.  I…one.”  Peter’s throat works.  His chin drops to his chest; his muscles go taught.

“Pete?”

The first gag almost passes for a sob, but the second is unmistakably a sound of illness.  Peter vomits hard, bringing up acid and thick, putrid fluid, evidence of the toll adrenaline’s already taken on his digestive system.

There aren’t any air sickness bags.  There’s rarely a need for them, and no industry standard forces their presence.  Peter retches into his lap before he leans forward and continues to heave over the floor.

“Ok, it’s ok,” Steve intones.  He wraps one arm around Peter’s chest to keep his clammy forehead from bouncing off the seat in front of him.  He doesn’t care about the warmth of bile seeping through his sleeve.  It’s messy, but it feels like progress.

“You’re gonna be fine.  It’s gonna pass.”  Steve gives the kid a pat on the back.  Peter hiccups.  He dry heaves one final time, then makes a pathetic sputtering sound.  He sits up weakly and wipes his mouth.

“I’m…” Peter chokes.  Spit and tears shine on his chin.  “I’m s—”

“Shh.  It’s ok.”  Steve doesn’t want to hear him say it.  He doesn’t want the kid to be sorry.  He doesn’t want him to have to worry about anything ever again, but that’s not feasible.  The least he can do is keep him from feeling bad about the mess.

Something flutters in Steve’s peripheral vision.  A paper towel.  Steve grabs it without looking at who’s offering.  He gives Peter’s face a good wipe before letting him shakily latch onto it along with a shred of dignity.

“I have Zofran,” Tony’s voice says.  Steve looks over his shoulder at him, still decked out in is Iron Man suit and rummaging in the first-aid kit.  “Tranqs, too, but I don’t know if, you know, a nap would help…”  Worry edges out the sheepishness on his face, but Steve feels bad for him again.  He’s just doing his best, addressing the problems he can see with the tools in his reach.

It’s unusual for Tony to defer to Steve.  Even more so for Steve to defer to someone else.  But he can’t make this call.  “What do you think?” he asks Peter.  “You want to take something for your stomach?  Or something to help you relax?”

Peter slowly shakes his head.  “I…  I think I’ll just ride it out,” he whispers.

“Ok.”  Steve nods.  He glances at Tony.  “We can do that.”

Tony looks at Steve.  Then back to Peter.  He closes the first-aid kit.  “Yeah,” he says.  “We can do that.”

[kz32816]

2020 Recap

Babe,

This year has officially made it to the top of the list for the worst years we’ve ever had. Us, and the rest of the world, but I’m focusing on us. So in January, we closed on our first house. I was so excited to finally settle down with you. I had dreams of decorating together, celebrating holidays, having parties, being as loud as we want, spending quality time in our home, expanding our family, and watching our little ones grow - all in this home we worked hard to get. It was perfect. I saw the beginning of the rest of our lives fold out right in front of us as I made fun of you for not signing your full legal name on the closing papers. I was so in love with you and with this life we were building together as a married couple. Then February and March hit, and along with it came the pandemic. The world was in chaos. We mostly had no idea what we were doing with our lives and our home as we stumbled through quarantine. You were temporarily laid off for two weeks and then I was laid off for four months. An incredibly frightening time for me as I didn’t trust the unemployment to cover our expenses. But as the quarantine grew longer and the summer months came, I noticed you treating me differently. In hindsight I can see it perfectly, but in the moment it was unclear. Thinking back, you were mean when we were moving it, but I thought you were stressed out because you were doing all the work while I was working 2 jobs and was never home. But as we got into the summer, you started drinking more and smoking weed every day. You started to degrade me and make fun of me openly around our friends. Any sort of problem I had and came to you about, you made me feel like garbage or like I was being an inconvenience to you. You didn’t care about spending time with me - really truly quality time. You thought hanging with literally anyone else on this planet was better than coming home to me after work, or so you made it feel. I knew something was wrong and tried doing things about it but you were resistant to therapy and nothing I ever did was good enough, so I stopped trying. Because why would I keep giving effort to someone who doesn’t even want to be around me anymore? Someone who definitely didn’t find me remotely attractive enough to be intimate with me. I was nothing more than a roommate to you. A roommate who was never good enough. Then the fall came around. You finally noticed there was something wrong with our relationship and decided to try and work on things ourselves. I finally pepped up enough to give some more effort. We would talk and talk and talk and neither of us would be able to actually hear what the other person was truly saying. It was so frustrating because we both were putting in effort, but not in the way the opposite person wanted. It was hurtful, frustrating, annoying, painful, but it was growing and learning, and I was happy to be in this painful spot of life with you because even though we weren’t great, we were still working. Then December came. You went to Florida to hang out with your best friend who is single and never wants to get married. I thought about you every single day you were gone. I redecorated the living room and was so proud because I thought you’d love it. I was so happy for you to go down there and spend some time away because I knew you had been stressed out and I knew you deserved a good vacation. I tried my best to leave you alone and not text you throughout the week because I knew you needed a break. When you came home, I was literally so excited to pick you up from the airport I could barely sit still from the time you texted me that you were wheels up. And what did I get when you got home? A phone call with severe annoyance in your voice, “why aren’t you here? I said 8:30″ and “okay well just get here”. In the car I let you talk about how amazing your trip was. I’d ask you questions about it because I knew you’d love to talk about it and it made you happy to recount the week you had in the warm weather. When we finally got back to our house I was looking forward to just spending time with you and talking to you because it has been just about 7 days since I had seen you and wanted to be near you and just talk to you. But what did I get? “I gotta watch the rest of the show before they take it off netflix” and “babe stop talking I have to watch the show” immediately after we walk through the door. I was honestly the most hurt in that moment. I had built up excitement all week, waiting for you to get home, missing you so badly it hurt, and when I finally got you back, all I got was a STFU from you. The following week was the worst week of my entire life. The next day you came home from work and told me you wanted a divorce. That you haven’t been in love with me for a long time and that everything we had together, you only did it because I wanted it, not because you did. That half of our relationship was basically a lie. And that you didn’t see a way we could work things out. Zack, I don’t know how you could have ever let those words come out of your mouth. After you promised me multiple times, alone and at the altar, that you would do anything and everything to make it through this life with me. And you so easily came to the conclusion that you wanted to throw away our marriage. After everything we had been through. It was the actual EASY route to scratch everything and leave, even though you don’t think so. What is hard, and what marriage is all about is choosing to stay when things get tough and uncomfortable. To do everything you can possibly do to find solutions and fix the parts that need fixing. I was willing to do that. I have always been willing to do that. And you, you just threw it all away. Just like that. I spend Christmas in a daze. New Years I got so drunk I texted a guy from my old job who has always been interested in me (an annoying mistake since now he won’t leave me alone and I want literally nothing to do with him). I wanted to drink until I forgot about you, but clearly that didn’t work well as we both know. Now here we are in 2021. You had a change of heart and want to work on things. You talk nice to me and take me out on dates. We spend time together, REAL time, and we live separately. But I’m still hurting. I still hear those words you said to me every day. Everything you do doesn’t feel genuine to me. It feels like you’re doing all these nice things because I once wanted you to. I am hurting because I reflect on all of my favorite memories of us and realize most of them were lies. You weren’t happy and you never told me. Our wedding day, my most favorite memory, is all a lie. The smile you wore in our pictures, I look at it and remind myself that you weren’t in love with me. You were unhappy and you married me anyway, tricked me into believing you were in love with me, because “that’s what we were suppose to do, get married”. I’ve been in love with you, unconditionally, despite the ups and downs, despite the way you’ve treated me in the last year, and I still very much despise you for deceiving me like you did. You turned my fairy tale life, with all the ups and downs and happy times and hard times that I was looking forward to spending with you, into a lie. Now you’re just a stranger to me. A familiar stranger. Everything you do now is a lie. And I want to be with you so badly, and some days when we’re together, it feels like I can be myself around you again and love you freely like I used to, but once we part, I’m reminded of the pain you put me through and the foundation of our relationship being all a façade. And those thoughts tint the time we have had together; past and now. And I think the thing I hate the very most, is under all these thoughts and feelings that I encounter daily, I am still in love with you. I still look at your smile and laugh and it warms my heart. I see your eyes and your beard and your goofiness. I love the way you feel when I throw my arms around you and how excited you get when you talk about something you love to do. And I hate it because I’m reminded that you’re not in love with me. And you haven’t been. For a long time. You’re taking me out for Valentine’s Day. A favorite day of mine. And I was actually genuinely surprised you wanted to take me out since you don’t like celebrating the day and you think it’s a fake holiday. But I struggle with what to do for you for this day. One side of me wants to get you something extravagant, as I would have done if we were still together. And the other part of me wants to get you nothing. But mostly, what I want is to be able to love you freely and wholeheartedly again. So, what I guess I’ll do is settle for this letter. I want you to know, as we’re going into therapy soon, how I felt and how I still feel. I don’t think there’s a way to ever convey the breath-taking, suffocating, things I felt from your decisions a few months ago. But I hope you can understand that I want nothing more than to be able to love you wholly again.

[lxngbottom-blog1]

BASICS;

Full Name: Neville Albert Longbottom Nicknames: Nev Age: 20 Date of Birth: July 30,1980 Zodiac Sign: Leo Gender Identity: Cis-Male Pronouns: he/him Sexual Orientation: Bisexual Faceclaim: Alberto Rosende

OOC;

Name: Caitlin Age: 25 Pronouns: she/her Timezone: CST Hogwarts House: Hufflepuff A Fun Fact About You: This is technically two but they relate! In the span of seven months I crossed the equator twice and circumnavigated the globe at the same time!

PERSONAL;

Relationship Status: Single and pining. Place of Birth: London, England Birth Order: Oldest and only child. Spoken Languages: English Accent: London English Parents & Siblings: Alice and Frank Longbottom Hometown: London Key Relationships:

Augusta Longbottom (Grandmother) - Raised him ever since he can remember. Despite a rocky relationship he loves her deeply.

Blaise Zabini (Ally) - Neville keeps his distance. Blaise is intimidating on a good day and Neville always feels like a moron around him.

Dean Thomas (Good Friend/Crush) - Neville has liked Dean since fifth year and it’s only gotten worse lately. They’ve been friends for years though and Neville would do anything for him.

Draco Malfoy (Ally) - Much like Blaise Neville keeps his distance. He admires his courage in defecting but it’s proving hard to let past experiences go. He’d rather avoid him.

Ginny Weasley (Good Friend) - He likes her. She’s the fiery part of his little friend group and he knows he can always turn to her for a smile and pep talk.

Harry Potter (New Friend) - Neville adores him. He’s just so normal for the guy whose supposed to save the wizarding world. He’s made it his mission to keep him happy and not run away screaming.

Hermione Granger (Friend) - She intimidates him a little bit but there’s no question she’s the leader. He’ll follow her to the ends of the Earth if it means they’ll put a stop to this war. He trusts her implicitly. Almost always takes her side in an argument. Almost always.

Lavender Brown (Sorta Friend) - Neville knows her because of how close she is to Parvati but outside of that he doesn’t know her very well. He likes her though and hopes she settles in with them as well as she can.

Luna Lovegood (Good Friend) - It’s with Luna Neville often feels the most like himself sometimes. She’s a little out there but he likes that about her. It’s easy to be around her and he revels in it.

Parvati Patil (Friend) - They weren’t super close in school but they were friends. Now that she’s here Neville is desperate to make her smile again. He’s taken her under his wing and spends a lot of time with her teaching her about plants and how the Resistance works. Anything to get her mind off of whatever she’s faced.

Ron Weasley (Friend) - For Neville the similarities to Ron and Ginny end at the red hair. She’s all spitfire and zest and he’s about laughing and team work. He likes him though and enjoys when they have guard duty together.

Seamus Finnegan (Friend) - They were in the same year it was only natural they came to be friends. Neville wouldn’t sort him among his closest and dearest but he’s pretty high up there. Lately he’s been feeling a little…competitive with him, for numerous reasons.

PERSONALITY;

Positive Traits: Agreeable, Dedicated, Valiant, Loyal, Diplomatic Negative Traits: Forgetful, Shy, Hesitant, Transparent, Insecure MBTI Type: I (75% Introverted) N (55% Intuitive) F (96% Feeling) P (79% Prospecting) - T (65% Turbulent) (INFP-T, The Mediator) Moral Alignment: Neutral Good Enneagram Type: Type 2 (The Helper) Wing 3 (The Achiever) Temperament: Phlegmatic Big Five Personality Type: Agreeableness

PHYSICAL;

Hair Color & Style: Dark brown. Cut short. Just long enough to tug on but not near long enough to even consider pulling it back. It’s gotten longer than he would like but he’s not very good at cutting his own hair. Facial Hair: None, he hates it. Eye Color: Dark Brown Complexion: Fair Ethnicity: ½ Cuban (Mother) & ½ Colombian (Father) Height: 5′4″ Weight: 143 lbs Physique: Muscular and lean Strengths: Herbology and diplomacy Weaknesses: Offensive Magic and Public Speaking Movement: Careful and balanced. It always looks like he’s put a bit of thought into his movements, like he thinks about what those actions might do as a ripple effect. He rarely moves with hesitation. Mannerisms & Habits: Neville forgets things when under a huge amount of stress at the time. If it doesn’t rank highly at the time he’s liable to forget all about it. Even if he shouldn’t. He paces when he’s nervous and he’s always picking his fingernails. He likes to tuck his nose in his shirt when he’s nervous or feeling anxious. Tattoos: None Piercings: None Scars & Birthmarks: Neville doesn’t have any distinguishing birthmarks but he’s got a lot of scars. Most of which he earned his last year in Hogwarts and from living on the run. He’s probably the mostly likely to run into a tree branch without meaning to. Most of his scars are little and easily ignored. He’s not even sure what most of them are from anymore. Clothing & Style: Cozy. Neville is a fan of trousers and sweaters. He likes to keep his arms covered. He’s almost always covered in dirt. And his fingernails are never clean. He likes muted colors and patterns. He favors red, for numerous reasons. He has so many hats and scarves as gifts from Luna that he never wears the same one twice a month. 

MAGIC;

Actual Hogwarts House: Gryffindor Alternate Hogwarts House: Hufflepuff Patronus: Neville is unable to produce a corporeal patronus at this point in time. If or when he does it would take the form of a golden retriever. Boggart: Severus Snape (Even without Harry at Hogwarts there was no denying that Snape hated Neville from day one. Without Harry there to take a portion of the hate he was much, much scarier to Neville.) Blood Status: Pureblood Wand Specs: Cedar Wood, Unicorn Hair, Quidditch Team: Neville doesn’t really follow the sport. He likes it but he’s not as in love with it as everyone around him seems to be. He almost always cheers for the team his friends are cheering for.

ASSOCIATIONS;

Colors: Green Words: Soft, Warm, Flower Scent: Soil Taste: Sweet Touch: Gentle Sound: Humming Weather: Rain Feelings: Abundant and always Memories: Hogwarts, Friends Magic: Beautiful 90′s Muggle Trivia/Paraphernalia: Overwhelming

FOR FUN;

Drink Order at A Bar: Something brightly colored. Neville chooses his drinks based on how cool they look. He doesn’t care what actually in them. Karaoke Song: Wonderwall - Oasis Book/Film/Music Genre: Fantasy and Non-Fiction How They Take Their Tea/Coffee: Two sugars. Sometimes honey. Depends on what’s available at the time. He’ll drink it straight too. He’s not picky. Go-To Breakfast: Eggs and toast Sleeping Position: Starfish. Always tangled up in the sheets. Favorite Swear Word: Fucking Hell

[megatraven]

Nothing Purrsonal Ch. 2

Summary: The school day just barely begins, and Marinette already finds herself struggling to get through it. Luckily, she can always count on Alya to give her some support.

AO3 | WC: 1595 | Chapter 1, 2

When Marinette finally dragged herself out of bed in the morning, she was happy to find that she hadn't yet missed any of her classes. Barely bothering to change clothes, and shooting a quick 'thank you' text to Chat Noir, Marinette skipped down the stairs to greet her parents.

"How're you feeling?" Tom asked her, concern lacing his words as he came forward and hugged her.

Marinette shrugged helplessly. "I dunno, Papa. But don't worry, I'm sure I'll bounce back soon! I'm Miss Positive, after all!" she exclaimed with false cheerfulness.

"Yeah... Just don't push yourself too hard, alright? Take all the time you need." He kissed her forehead before messing up her hair.

Chuckling, just a bit, she ducked away from his hand. "Papa! Now my hair looks even worse!"

Tom laughed with her, but the mood was quick to become somber again. Clearing his throat, he reached for a box on the counter and handed it to her. "Your mother made you some of your favorite macarons to bring to school. Make sure to thank her on your way out, alright?"

"I will. Thanks, Papa," she said, giving him another hug before taking the box. Once she shouldered her backpack, she headed downstairs and stopped by the front counter. She slung an arm over her mom's shoulders and kissed her cheek. "Thank you for the macarons, Maman."

Sabine smiled and pulled her into a side-hug. "I hope you feel better, dear. Have a nice day in school."

"I'll try," Marinette promised, disengaging from Sabine and grabbing a croissant from the display case. Shoving it into her mouth so her hands would be free to carry the macarons, she headed out.

The sky was overcast and the day was cool, tiny splatters of rain telling her it was going to be storming soon. Wishing she'd checked the weather and grabbed an umbrella before leaving, Marinette sighed and crossed the road. The school building loomed over her alongside the memories of yesterday's events, making her pause on the steps.

"Ok... I can do this. Everything's fine, everything's cool," she muttered in an attempt to give herself a pep talk.

Tikki poked her head out from her purse. "Everything is fine, Marinette. You can do this. Nobody will judge you for what happened yesterday."

Marinette shot her a grateful smile. "Thanks, Tikki, I really hope you're right."

"I'm almost certain I am. I'll be here if you need me," she said before disappearing back into the purse with a wink.

With a deep breath to settle her nerves and hopefully keep her stomach in check, she walked through the doors and headed to class. In the courtyard, she offered smiles that were a little too wide to her classmates, grimacing when she'd made it past all of them. Hopefully they wouldn't think too much of it.

Entering the classroom, she let out a sigh of relief and settled in at her desk, leaning back against the bench so that her head rested on top of it and setting the macarons next to her. Not the most comfortable position ever, but she didn't care enough to adjust to a better one. Closing her eyes, she tried to focus on calming herself, and could feel it working until her phone pinged loudly, reverberating through the empty room.

Marinette slapped her hand down on her phone and groaned until she hit the right button to silence it. Cracking an eye open to see who texted back, she jolted to her feet at the name on her screen.

(8:13) Thanks for last night

(8:21) No purroblem! (^w^)

(8:22) Have a wonderfur day!

Smiling softly at his message, she tucked her phone away and took out her sketchbook instead. No grand ideas came to mind when her pencil hit the page, making her frustrations bubble up again. Logically, she knew it was silly to expect some huge, never-before-thought-of idea to just reveal itself to her. Unfortunately, she didn't quite have the patience for logic just hen.

Growling, she flipped through the pages she'd already filled out and began to feel worse. Mediocre, she thought, ugly, too simple, physically impossible, mediocre, mediocre. The frown that'd stolen her smile away deepened. Mediocre. Mediocre. Clashing elements, and not in a good way. Mediocre.

Her heartbeat picked up in speed as she continued looking through them, right up until she ripped one right from her book.

Unproffessional.

Rip.

Mediocre.

Rip.

Ugly.

Rip. Rip. Rip. Rip.

"Marinette, hey-" Alya said, her voice cutting through the storm of doubt and frustration that clouded Marinette's mind. "Marinette!"

The next rip was cut short when Alya's hands grabbed onto hers, keeping them from tearing out another page. Marinette looked up and found that she could barely even see Alya's face. When had she started crying?

"What'd you do, Mari?" she asked, looking at all the pages strewn about. Some were crumpled into balls and others were just thrown around her.

"I don't... I don't know. I was just trying to make something new, and it's like this tiny, minuscule piece of doubt I had in my mind grew ten times larger, and suddenly everything... everything was just... bad."

"Oh, Sweets." Releasing her hands, Alya moved in for a hug, squeezing tightly until Marinette returned the embrace. "Is it ok if I take your book for the day? Just in case?"

Marinette nodded, rubbing her face on Alya's shirt at the same time. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay. You don't have to apologize. Let's just focus on getting through today okay, yeah? I'll be right here with you, okay?"

"Okay," she said, wiping her nose on her arm. Looking at Alya's shirt now stained with tears and snot, she apologized again. "Sorry about your shirt, I didn't mean-"

"It's okay. No big deal, I'll just wash it when I get home later." Pulling away from Marinette, and looking at the clock, she cursed. "Here, sit down and I'll collect all your drawings, okay?"

"But I can help!"

"I know you can. But I can handle this. You just try to relax and chill." Her eyes landed on the box of macarons on their seat. "Eat a little, get a drink."

Marinette looked like she wanted to argue, but ultimately bowed her head in defeat and sat down. "Thanks," she murmured, reaching for the box. Opening it, she found lavender and honey macarons, as well as a few strawberry ones thrown in. She pulled out a lavendar and honey one to nibble on and watched Alya clean her mess, somewhat guilty and definitely feeling like crap.

It was all done pretty quickly, though. Alya uncrumpled the pages that needed it and then put all of them inside the sketchbook, which she then slid into her own backpack before settling down next to her best friend.

"That looks pretty good," Alya commented, her attempt to change the subject sudden but not unwanted. "Fresh or leftovers?"

"Fresh. Maman made them this morning. There's strawberry too." She jiggled the box. "Want one?"

"I'd love one, thanks." Taking the same kind Marinette had out, Alya popped the whole thing in her mouth. "Sho, di' you shleep well?"

That pulled a tiny laugh from Marinette. "Surprisingly, I slept pretty okay."

Alya swallowed and wiped at her mouth. "Oh, good. Now I guess the real question is, how much sleep was it?"

"Ah, well... I don't exactly know. I kind of lost track of the time, I fell asleep without even trying. Probably slept enough, if me getting to school early means anything."

"True, true," Alya said, nodding along. She was about to say more when other classmates started to flood into the room. "We'll talk later, okay?"

"Okay," Marinette agreed, relieved that she wouldn't have to deal with her situation further that morning. She kept her eyes on the desk in front of her, refusing to look up as her friends passed by to their own seats. The longer it took them all to get seated, the more the sound of their feet shuffling grated on her nerves and sent her stomach into a frenzy.

Thankfully, the bell rang out loudly, and when she looked around, she saw everyone was there, save for Chloe. That was a relief of its own, but now for the normal reasons.

"Alright, alright, settle down, class," Mme. Bustier said, walking through the door a few seconds late. "Remember that this week is Hero Appreciation Week, so whether they're super or not, make sure to let them know you appreciate them! Now, let's go over yesterday's homework."

Although it made her feel bad, Marinette started to tune Mme. Bustier's voice out. It was a little hard to focus on getting through the day and on the homework she hadn't even completed, after all.

Propping her head up on her hands, she was ready to just watch the class pass her by until the door slammed open.

Chloe walked in, tapping away on her phone.

"Chloe, you're already late. No phones."

The girl groaned, but pocketed her phone anyways. When she passed by Adrien, her eyes landed not on him, but on Marinette, who stared back. She continued to look until Mme. Bustier scolded her again, forcing her to turn her attention to the board.

Marinette groaned and laid her head on her desk. It was official: she was not going to have a good day. Her only saving grace came when Alya reached over and squeezed her hand and Tikki pressed against her side, reminding her that she wasn't alone.