#Oh if we all could afford to live no one would work
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I’ve had a job I’ve worked at for two years. If management wasn’t so bad and I didn’t have to worry about my bills I would have stayed at that job even though I’ve had to deal with a good amount of bad customers. I genuinely loved the job itself.
#I always find it interesting how people are like#Oh if we all could afford to live no one would work#And it’s like no that’s true#I have written over three hundred fics#That’s something I do for free#I’ve offered to help tutor someone for free#I’ve cooked for some people and never expected anything back#I often do not have a lot of faith in humanity#But I believe humans are capable of doing acts of kindness and of work#Without being paid#It’s just not always apparent because we’re busy struggling to finically make it#if I had the free time I would volunteer at the library and offer to help tutor certain people#it’s just I don’t often have that free time#And when I do have time I’m having to rest because I am working so much and there’s a toll to pay
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#i am at my fucking limit lol#i need to leave this fucking town and this fucking state the very second i can nail down both a car and a remote job#the fucking ''''affordable'''' housing company i rent from has once again opted to start harassing us#and we're once again gonna have to be in a fucking fight with landlords who think that we're making too much money to live in a $1200 apt#and want us to pay $2000 a month for this rathole we live in despite taxes and deductions literally absorbing a quarter of our earnings#so they want to absorb half of what we have left when ive yet to be able to even afford a car that isn't a fucking beater destined for scrap#at least not without using p much all of my current life savings in the process#so we have to instead get around by buses that refuse to actually show up take us on huge detours for no reason have lead feet that-#-exacerbate my chronic pain and - oh! how could i forget? is also horrifically mismanaged to the point where they're now canceling entire-#-bus routes including the one i take to work and ALSO GOES TO THE AIRPORT lol#and nothing will fucking change about the highway robbery rent hikes bc the entire state legislature is filled with and bought by-#-landlords NIMBYs and property management firms.#that's not even getting into the fact that ive got too many traumatic memories too many enemies and not enough good things to show for it#the only thing I've got in this fucking town is my partner bc not even our home can be considered safe anymore.#i want to take them and the home we dream of and get the fuck out bc i can't keep doing this shit#and i can't even fucking talk to them about this bc they need me to be the strong one for once#im so tired. i feel like im in danger even though i know we'd be able to tank the hit to our finances. but i would like to escape.#i know of a city in ny where our $1200 rent is considered the norm. there's also so much more to do within reach that isn't just. drinking.#i wanna go there. i may have had a desire to live there since our vacation there this past March.#but for now im stuck here dreaming of the future and fighting off desperation and despair in the present#this breakdown brought to you by: the bus purposely avoiding my stop this morning after learning my landlord wants to ruin us again#vent
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Okay, someone please settle this argument I’m having with my dad:
Someone has hung a basket of their things (in this case face cloths and scrubbies) with those Command removable hook things (you use a double sided sticky thing and it gives a really strong hold) in the shared bathroom. Because you take longer and hotter than average showers, one of the hooks keeps falling off and so the basket falls down. Do you:
A) inform the person whose basket it is that it’s fallen down and the hook needs replacing, but other than removing the basket from the other hook so it doesn’t fall and damage the sink it’s over, do nothing else to interfere
B) inform the person that it’s fallen down and offer to rehang it if desired, but if you can’t remember how it was hung/don’t think you can do an appropriately satisfactory job at rehanging it, you don’t touch it and leave it to them
C) don’t say anything and rehang it incorrectly and wonkily, and then when the other person points out that you did it wrong and you should have just left it to them, kick off and insist that the other person is being ungrateful.
#hint: i think the answer should be A or B here.#I genuinely don’t know if I’m overreacting by being mad about this cause like…it’s happened three times now and he KEEPS hanging it wonky#and I think that’s partly why it keeps falling is because the weight distribution is wrong#why can’t he just fucking leave it to me?#also why does he have to spend an age in the fucking shower#he’s got much worse since we stopped living with mother and my brother#‘oh it’s cause we’ve got a much nicer shower than the one at my partners’#okay? doesn’t mean you have to spend more time in it.#- for context the shower we had in the house I grew up in didn’t have hot water. the fucked up the plumbing when they built it#and the only way the six different plumbers that we had put to look at it could see fixing it was to essentially rebuild the whole bathroom#and replumb the whole upstairs#which we just couldnt afford#so for my entire life from the age of 2 to 20 i lived in a house that only had a cold shower and it would regularly just…not work#like at least once every two months it would just stop pumping water. and all the plumbers would ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and go ‘yeah…we’ve got no way of#fixing this without ripping the whole thing out’#I then spent half a year showering in an outdoor hosepipe because I was living in a tent.#I am incredibly good at quick showers#I went ‘oh. hot shower. this is a luxury that I should be gratefully for. still gonna have quick showers though because let’s not waste hot#water’#my dad went ‘oh. hot shower. this is a luxury that shall not be wasted’ and proceeded to have the longest showers of his life.#tbf I think they’re only a little bit longer than the average person’s shower#but because I shower so quickly by comparison they seem looooong
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this is me trying 𖦹 OP81
PAIRINGS: oscar piastri x female!reader
SUMMARY: growing up, the only thing you know is that you need to be strong, provide, and take care of your sister. but being with oscar, it was different, he made you feel things—that it’s okay to not be fine, vulnerable, and to be taken care of.
AUTHOR’S NOTE: i have this fic finished the other day but i was debating on whether to post it or not, but here we are. it’s been a while too since i last wrote for oscar, and this is like a comfort (?) fic idk lol. also, can i just say that LANDO ON POLE FOR THE SG GP!!! 😭🧡 ok, i hope you guys will have fun reading this one. enjoy! :)
REMINDERS: this is purely fiction, the way how the character is portrayed in my story does not reflect the person that is portraying my character in real life. always separate fiction from reality, and do not repost or copy my work in any way.
WORD COUNT: 3.6k
WARNINGS: not proofread, typos, eldest daughter syndrome, no use of y/n, cursing, unnamed sister, named friend, and parents death
You were sitting in the living room, surrounded by case files and legal books, trying your best to prepare for the court trial that you’ll be doing soon, but your mind was elsewhere. You can't focus on the work that you’re working on in front of you, no matter how hard you try. Your phone buzzed, and you almost didn’t answer, thinking it’s just another work call, but when you saw Blaire, your friend’s name, flash on the screen you quickly picked up, expecting a casual chat.
“Hey, Blaire, how are you?” You greeted her, trying to mask your exhaustion.
Her voice on the other end was hesitant, not the usual warm tone that you’re used to. “Hey…I really hate to bring this up, but I was wondering when you would be able to repay the five thousand dollars?”
Your stomach dropped. “Repay?” You repeated, utterly confused. “What do you mean five thousand dollars?”
The conversation between you and Blaire unraveled quickly. She explained how she had lent the money to your sister out of need, thinking it was for you or with your approval. Rage bubbled in your chest, your pulse quickened, at this point all you can see is red. You thanked her hastily, barely able to end the call before fury overtook you. Without thinking, you dialed your sister’s number, the beeps echoing in your ear like a countdown to an explosion.
“Hello?” Her voice was casual, completely unaware of the storm coming her way.
“What the actual fuck did you do?!” You yelled, not caring if it was late at night. “You borrowed five fucking thousand dollars from Blaire without asking me!? How could you?!”
There was a pause, a brief moment where you could almost feel her shrug through the phone. “Oh my god, can you relax? It’s not like you can't afford it. It’s not that big of a deal, you can just easily pay for it with how big you’re making, it’s barely a scratch on your bank account!” You couldn’t believe what you were actually hearing.
“Not a big deal? Did you spend the money already? Do you have any fucking idea how humiliating it is for me that you did this without even consulting me? You think just because I make good money, I’ll fix every mess you create?” You were seething.
“Well, yeah,” she responded with a laugh, clearly not grasping the gravity of the situation. “You’re my older sister. Isn’t it your job to take care of me, right?”
Your grip on your phone tightened. “I’ve been taking care of you your whole life! I’m working myself to the bone just to make sure you have everything you need, sending you to that fancy school that you’ve always wanted so you can have a better future, and this is how you repay me? By lying and stealing?”
The silence on the other end of the line felt heavy, but your anger has not subsided. She mumbled something that sounded like a half assed apology, but it was already too late for that. You immediately hung up and slammed the phone down on the table, heart racing, pulse pounding in your ears. Anger still swirling inside you like a storm, the words of your sister still echoing in your mind. You can just easily pay for it with how big you’re making. Her carelessness, lack of respect—it hit harder than anything you had experienced before. It wasn’t about the money, you could handle the five thousand dollars easily, but the way she completely dismissed your hard work, as if it was nothing, as if your sacrifice and years of struggle meant nothing—that was what burned deep. It hurts like fucking hell.
You sat down there on the couch, trying to calm yourself down, tears started to prick at the corners of your eyes, but you blinked them back. You didn’t cry. You cannot cry. You have always been strong your whole life—the provider, carer, and protector. That’s who you were. No one had ever taken care of you, not since your parents passed away when you were fifteen and your sister is only ten. It has always been you, alone, against the world, and now, it felt like even your sister was against you.
You didn’t hear Oscar enter the living room until his voice, soft but firm, broke through the silence. “Hey, I heard you from our room. Are you okay?”
You swallowed hard, your body automatically stiffening instinctively and continued browsing through your documents like nothing happened.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Don’t worry,” you lied, though the quiver in your voice betrayed you.
Oscar walked over and sat down beside you on the couch, his hand gently resting on your shoulder. “You don’t always have to be fine,” he said quietly. “Tell me, what happened?”
You exhaled sharply, your hands trembling as you ran them through your hair. “It’s my sister,” you muttered, trying to keep your voice steady. “She borrowed money from Blaire. Five thousand dollars. Without even telling me. Now, she’s acting like it’s my job to fix it.”
“Five thousand? That’s a lot.” Oscar frowned, his brows knitting in concern.
“I know,” you said, “she doesn’t even care. She just assumes I’ll take care of it, like I always do every time she gets into stupid situations. She thinks just because I earn good money, I’m supposed to fix everything.” Your voice cracked, and before you could stop it, the tears you had been holding back for so long finally broke free. “I don’t know how much longer I can do this, Oscar. I’m always the one fixing things, I’m always the one who has to be strong.”
Oscar didn’t say anything for a moment, he just stared at you, his eyes filled with understanding. Then, without a word, he pulled you into his arms. You tensed at first, still not used to being vulnerable, but Oscar’s embrace was warm, grounding. Slowly, your body relaxed into his, and the weight of the world seemed to lift just a little as you rested your head against his chest.
“It’s not fair,” you whispered to him. “I’ve always had to be the strong one. I’m tired, Oscar. I’m so fucking tired. I don’t know how much more I can take.”
His hand gently stroked your back, his voice soft and reassuring. “I know. It’s okay to be tired. You don’t have to be strong all the time. Not with me.”
You pulled back slightly to look at him, your eyes searching his face, “I just don’t know how to let anyone help me,” you admitted, voice barely audible. “I’ve been doing this for so long, I don’t know how to not be the one in control.”
“I get that. But you don’t have to do it all alone anymore. I’m here. Let me be strong for you, too.” Oscar smiled gently, brushing a tear from your cheek with his thumb.
For a moment, you didn’t know what to say. The idea of letting someone else carry even a fraction of the weight feels completely foreign to you. But as you looked at Oscar, his eyes full of sincerity, something inside you shifted. Maybe, it’s time you let it all fall down, you didn’t have to carry everything on your shoulders all the time.
“What am I supposed to do about her?” You asked, your voice small but steady now.
Oscar sighed softly, thinking for a moment. “You have all the right to be angry and upset. Your feelings are valid,” he said. “She needs to learn that actions have consequences. But at the same time, she’s your sister. She’s young, and sometimes young people tend to make mistakes. You’ve been doing everything for so long that she probably hasn’t learned how to take responsibility for herself yet.”
You nodded, wiping your eyes. “Yeah, maybe. But I can’t just let her think she can keep doing this.”
“No,” he agreed. “But you also don’t have to do this alone. We can figure it out together.”
You looked at him, really looked at him, and for the first time in a long time, you felt like you weren’t alone. Maybe you didn’t always have to be the strong one, the provider, the protector. With Oscar by your side, you could learn how to let someone else carry the weight with you.
“Thank you,” you whispered, leaning into him once more. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
Oscar smiled, pressing a soft tender kiss to your forehead. “You’ll never have to find out, I’m not going anywhere, my love.”
The next morning, you stared at the screen of your laptop, fingers moving quickly over the keys as you finished drafting the contract. The legal jargon was familiar, comforting even, but the fact that you had to use it against your own sister left a bitter taste in your mouth. The contract was firm, direct, and laid out the consequences clearly: five thousand dollars, to be repaid in installments, with interest and penalties if the deadline is missed. You hated doing it—your heart never felt so heavy—but you knew it was necessary. You had been too lenient for far too long, if she didn’t learn this now, she might never understand the true value of money and the responsibility that came with it. It was time for her to learn the hard truths you had known your entire life.
Oscar was sitting across the table, sipping his coffee, watching you in silence. “You’ve finished it?” He asked gently. You had told him last night that you need to straighten everything out, and told him your plan, in which he quickly supported you.
You nodded, eyes scanning the contract one last time before saving it. “Yeah. She’s not going to like it, but this has to be done.” You sighed, “I’ve been too lenient, too forgiving. I can’t keep cleaning up after her messes.”
“You’re doing the right thing.” He said as he reached over, placing his hand over yours. “It’s tough, but you’re teaching her a lesson she won’t forget.”
“I hope so,” you sighed, glancing out the window, the weight of responsibility pressing down on you once more. “I’ve never been one to ask for anything back, but she needs to learn that she can’t just treat me like this. I want her to be successful, but she can’t rely on me forever.”
Later that day, you booked a flight for her to Monaco, and notified her about the flight schedule. She was studying in Switzerland, and it would be a four hour flight from Switzerland to Monaco. It was time to have this conversation face-to-face. You couldn’t keep allowing her to avoid responsibility just because you were miles apart. This is a conversation that is long overdue.
A couple of days later, she arrived at your and Oscar’s shared apartment. She seemed different—more subdued, perhaps. You could tell the weight of your anger still lingered in her mind. She greeted you cautiously, her eyes flickering to Oscar, who stood nearby, his presence calm but protective.
“Sit down,” you said, pointing to the couch.
She looked at you, clearly trying to gauge your mood, but she did as she was told. You sat across from her, with Oscar by your side, and the freshly printed contract lying on the table between you. The tension in the living room was thick.
“I had already settled your debt with Blaire,” you began, your voice calm but firm. “But this conversation is not just about the money. It’s about respect, about responsibility.”
“I said I was sorry.” She crossed her arms, trying to play it cool.
“Sorry doesn’t fix this,” you snapped, your patience was already running thin, barely hanging on by a thread. “I have been providing for you because I want nothing but the best for you. But what you did was careless, and you disrespected everything I’ve done for you. You didn’t even ask me before borrowing that money, and then you just blatantly assumed I would handle it. You do this every time to me, you always get me into awkward and humiliating situations.”
She bit her lip, her attitude wavering. “I know, but you make so much—”
“That’s not the point!” You cut her off, about to lose your cool but Oscar had managed to calm you down by softly caressing your back. “Yes, I make good amount of money, but that money just doesn’t magically appear. I have worked hard, harder than you can imagine, to get to where I am. Do you want to know what’s worse? What’s worse is that you’re not even thinking about how hard it is to earn that money, how I burn myself off everyday. So I’m making you earn it back.” You slid the contract towards her.
“What’s this?” She looked down at it, then back at you, looking all confused.
“It’s an agreement,” you said. “I’ve decided to give you the five thousand dollars. Consider what you bought from that money as a gift, because I know you’ve been doing well in school, and it’s been a while since I’ve given you anything. But this will never happen again. You owe me that money, and you're going to pay it back. Every cent of it, with interest.” Her eyes widened, and she opened her mouth to protest, but you cut her off before she could even speak.
“This is not negotiable. I’m still going to support you, I’m still going to pay for your tuition, but you need to learn how hard it is to earn this kind of money. You’re going to work for it, and I'll expect proof—payslips, records—everything. If you miss a payment, there will be penalties added, and if you refuse or try to make a fool out of me, I’m not afraid to take legal action.”
“You’d sue me? Your own sister?” She stared at you in disbelief.
“Yes, I would,” you said coldly. “I don’t want to, but you’ve left me with no choice. You are already eighteen and will turn nineteen in two months, you are already capable of knowing what’s right and wrong. You need to understand that I’m not going to bail you out every time you mess up, this is your responsibility now.”
For a long moment, she didn’t say anything. Her face was a mix of shock and anger, but you could tell the gravity of the situation was already starting to sink in.
“I’m not trying to be harsh,” you said softly, leaning forward. “But I’ve been in your shoes, and I know firsthand how hard life can be. I have shielded you from that, and maybe that was my mistake. But if you’re going to succeed in this world, you need to understand that nothing is free, nothing in life is free. Everything comes with a cost.”
Oscar then leaned forward, gently placing a hand on your shoulder. “Look, we’re not doing this to hurt you,” he added, tone gentle but firm. “But this is a wake-up call. You need to understand how your sister has worked so hard, and how important it is that you start contributing. No one’s saying you have to do it alone, but you have to start doing something.”
Your sister’s eyes shifted between the two of you, and for a moment, you saw a flicker of guilt in her expression. She glanced back down at the contract, and you handed her a pen.
“Okay,” she whispered. “I’ll do it. I’ll pay you back.” Her attitude and defiance slowly faded from her face.
“Good.” You nodded, “then sign it.”
She hesitated for only a moment before scribbling her signature across the bottom of the contract. You felt a strange mixture of relief and sadness, knowing you had to be this tough, but also hoping it would be the turning point she needed.
“You can stay with us while you’re in Monaco,” you told her, “but I expect you to find a job as soon as possible. If you fail to keep up with your end of the deal, there will be consequences. Understood?”
“Understood.” She nodded, though her expression was still a mix of resentment and defeat.
You exhaled, feeling a small sense of relief wash over you. This wasn’t easy, and you hated having to be this strict with her, but it had to be done. Oscar wrapped his arm around you, his touch grounding as soon as you watched your sister head towards the guest room.
“You did the right thing,” he said quietly.
“I hope so,” you whispered, leaning into him. “I just want her to grow up.”
“Don’t worry, she will.” Oscar assured you, pressing a soft kiss to the side of your head. “With you as her sister, she doesn’t have much of a choice,”
Later that evening, the apartment finally fell quiet, dinner was definitely awkward and quiet, but with your sister already tucked away in the guest room, the weight of everything you had said and done began to settle in. You were sitting at the edge of the bed, heart heavy and mind replaying what had happened earlier over and over. The way your sister had looked at you—hurt and angry—it cut deeper that you were willing to admit.
You had always been strong, but this strength had come with a cost. Now, sitting in the stillness of the night, the reality of your actions hit you like a tidal wave. It wasn’t just the contract or the money, it was the fear—the fear that in trying to teach her a lesson, you might have pushed her too far. That in being the disciplinarian, you had damaged something that might never fully recover or heal.
Oscar entered the room quietly, sensing the shift in your mood. He sat beside you, his presence had always been comforting, but it wasn’t enough to stop the flood of emotions you had been holding back.
“Was I too harsh, Osc?” You whispered, voice barely audible.
He frowned slightly, tilting his head to look at you. “No, you weren’t. She needed to hear all of it.”
“I know,” you replied, voice trembling. “But what if I lose her because of this? What if she hates me for it?”
You felt your tears welling up again, but this time you couldn’t stop them anymore. They spilled down your cheeks, unchecked, as you finally let go of the tension and frustration you had been carrying.
“I’m not being harsh to punish her, I just want her to understand how hard life is, how much I’ve sacrificed. But what if all she sees is me being cruel?”
Oscar pulled you close, wrapping his arms around you as you broke down. You rested your head on his chest, sobs coming in waves, guilt and fear crashing over you. You had always been strong for so long—too long—and now, it felt like everything was unraveling.
“She’s my baby sister,” you choked out between sobs. “I don’t want to lose her. But I don’t know what else to do. I don’t want her to think I’m just some heartless person who only cares about money.”
Oscad held you tighter, his voice calm and steady as he spoke. “She won’t hate you. Not forever. She’s upset now, sure. But she’s young, and right now, she probably doesn’t understand why you’re doing this. But she will, trust me. One day, she’ll look back at it and realize that you did this because you love her.”
You shook your head, your chest tightening with the weight of your emotions. “I feel like I’m always the one who has to be the bad guy. I never get to be the one who’s just there for her, to support her without judgment.”
Oscar stroked your hair gently, his voice soothing. “You’ve done more for her than anyone else ever could. You’ve given her everything. You’re not the bad guy, you’re her protector, even when it means being tough on her. Yeah, maybe this will cause a rift for now, but it won’t last. She’ll come around, she’ll see that you’re doing this because you care.”
You pulled away slightly, wiping at your tear-streaked face. “What if she doesn’t?”
“She will,” Oscar said firmly. “But even if it takes time, you can’t keep beating yourself up for doing what’s right. You’re teaching her a lesson that no one else will. You’re giving her the tools to grow up, to be responsible. Sometimes, that means being tough. That’s tough love.”
You nodded, but the guilt still gnawed at you. “I just wish I didn’t have to be this person all the time. The one who fixes things, who keeps everyone in line.”
“I know. But you’re not doing this alone anymore, okay? I’m here. Whenever it feels like it’s too much, rest on me. You can always rest on me.”
You leaned into him again, his warmth easing the ache that you’re feeling inside of you. “I just hope she understands someday,” you whispered.
“She will,” Oscar said softly, kissing the top of your head. “And until then, you’ve done what you needed to do. You’ve set her on the right path, and that’s what matters.”
As the tears slowly subsided, you felt a flicker of hope, knowing that even though this was hard, it was necessary. Even if your sister doesn't see it now, you could only hope that one day, she would understand that everything you did was out of love.
The weight on your shoulders became a little lighter, knowing that Oscar was right. Even if it took time, even if there were still battles to fight, you knew you weren’t facing them alone anymore, and for the first time in what felt like forever, you allowed yourself to breathe. You had done what needed to be done. Now it was up to your sister to follow through.
#Spotify#f1#formula 1#formula one#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x reader#oscar piastri#oscar piastri 81#oscar piastri fic#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri x female!reader#oscar piastri imagine#op81 imagine#op81 x reader#op81 fic#op81 fluff#op81#op81 x you#op81 x y/n
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For whatever reason, I found myself thinking about the theme of heritage/inheritance in Harry Potter and how it's, like, catastrophically broken in the text.
The villains in Harry Potter are almost unanimously racist and classist - they believe they are entitled to behave however they wish and live at the top of the social hierarchy because they were born to rich, pureblooded families, and anyone who wasn't is filth to be exploited and/or purged. That's the philosophy of evil in the book - "I deserve everything because I was born in the right family with the right genes and the right social standing. My heritage makes me better than you."
All the injustice and evil in the books is rooted in this belief in entitlement by way of heritage. People are abused and die because of it. Inherited wealth and status, and more specifically the unfair priveleges it affords, is the root of evil in Harry Potter.
So you'd think the protagonist would present some sort of strong contrast to it, right? That they'd be born poor, or mixed race, etc. But no, Harry is from a rich pureblood family, with the vast wealth and social status that affords.
Well, that's OK, we can still make a contrast. Maybe Harry differs in how he acts with wealth - perhaps, realizing his inheritance is an unfair privilege, he gives it away? Maybe he works to give the underprivileged their due? Again, no, not really. He sometimes buys stuff for his poor friend Ron, and defends his "mudblood" friend Hermione from racist criticism, but he sees no reason to change the system that dehumanizes them in the first place, and by the end of the tale is pleased to exploit his privilege for his own gain.
The whole house elf subplot illustrates this failing well - we have a race of slaves who are frequently shown to suffer from abuse. One of them, the property of a rich racist, risks his life to save Harry, and Harry frees him in return. Oh, nice, finally fighting the system, eh? Except no, not really - while Harry frees that specific slave, he's content to leave the others in bondage, especially when he inherits a slave of his own.
The contrast Harry Potter puts up against its rich, racist, privileged villains is "Hey, being rich and higher in the hierarchy is awesome and just, but you can't be a dick about it." That slaves belong in the dirt, but masters should be polite while putting them in their place.
Voldemort posits himself as the heir of Slytherin - claiming his inheritance is vital to his rise to power and villainy. And Harry opposes him by... also claiming inheritance from a rich old dead guy. Hell, the final battle comes down to who rightfully inherits a specific rare Wand!
The fact that Harry and Voldemort have shit in common is not a flaw on its own - villains and heroes are often foils for each other. But in this specific tale, the relationship the villain has with inherited power is so central to the conflict that the hero having the exact same relationship is a major failing. The story is just shy of saying "Voldemort was basically right, but he shouldn't have been rude about it." It's bad from both a moral and a writing skill perspective.
(The only inheritance Harry fully rejects is parseltongue, i.e. the ability to talk to snakes, which was accidentally given to him by Voldemort, and could be argued to be a symbol of trauma rather than inherited wealth. Also I'm still salty about how that series turned on snakes so cruelly, but that's a whole other rant.)
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Friends- Lando Norris (Mirror Sex)
20! KINKTOBER! MINORS DNI
Remember this contains sexual descriptions, nudity, and intercourse.
Lando and I had been friends since kids, until last year, when he needed to get married to someone quickly because of his mafia business. We lived in a huge property in Monaco but I am always used to being alone. I was ready for bed when a loud bang caught my attention. I run in its direction. The kitchen.
He was standing there, with cuts and bruises on his face.
"What happened?" I ask completely worriedly, he wasn't one to take hits.
"Got to sleep" his tone is cold, like always.
"Lan" I whisper, walking to him. Avoiding eye contact he washes his cuts in the sink, splashing his face with cold water.
"Like I said, go to bed," He says in the same emotionless tone. But I stubbornly step closer to him. "Why are you coming closer?" he looks at me over his shoulder.
"I want to check on you... please" I whisper, still worried about his cuts' deepness.
He lets out a heavy sigh "It's nothing... I'm fine" I take the cloth he's holding, my eyes maintaining eye contact with him. "I'm truly fine, I don't need your help" he mutters.
"I know, but still" I start to work on his cuts "Let me" I smile weakly.
"You're so damn stubborn" Grumbling under his breath he finally gives in, letting me work on his cuts, resting his waist against the counter.
I pay attention to his face, seems like he doesn't feel any hurt from the cuts at all. His stare is fixed on me as I take care of him.
"Yep, I am" I smirk. "You don't have to act like you're not hurting...not with me" I turn his face to the side.
"Hmph" mumbles and stays quiet as I continue to take care of him.
I take his eyes on me, I knew he was trying to suppress his vulnerability. He clears his throat, trying to regain his composure.
"You don't have to be so gentle. I've had worse" He tries to sound nonchalant, but deep down he appreciates my concern, even though he would never admit it.
"Just because you had worse before, doesn't mean you have to be rough" I stop for a minute to look at him.
"I've got a reputation to maintain... you know" He says, half-jokingly, the corner of his mouth curving up in the smallest smile possible.
"Not with me" I go back to clean the last cuts and dry blood.
He raises an eyebrow, his eyes locking onto mine. "Oh really? you think it's easy to let my guard down around you just because you're my wife?"
"I mean, it should, we were friends..."
He lets out a humorless laugh.
"I've spent my entire life hiding behind walls. Letting my guard down is not something I'm used to doing, especially not around you... you know a lot"
"Especially not around me," I repeat. "Woah"
He could tell that hurt.
"I didn't mean it like that, it's just ... you make me feel things I'm not used to feeling... it's " He looks away. "Uncomfortable"
"I know... but I could be your walls, you can rely on me"
He moves his eyes and I can see the relief and vulnerability at my words. Knowing he might be feeling the necessity of pulling me away, but I also knew I was carving my way through his heart.
"You don't know what you're saying" He sighs.
"I know exactly what I'm saying"
"It's not that simple. Letting someone in means I'd have to be vulnerable, and I have enemies all around me... I can't afford to be vulnerable" he speaks his mind.
I hold his cheeks "You don't have to be tough all the time."
"I've been tough my whole life. I can't just change that, even for the sake of being vulnerable with you" He takes a few deep breaths, trying to keep his emotions in check. "you're making this hard for me, you know that?" He lets out another deep sigh. "God, you have no idea the power you have over me" He murmured quietly.
"I do?" I smile, knowing I have made my way.
He nods slightly, his eyes still locked on mine. "Yes, you do. You can make me feel things I thought I was incapable of feeling. You challenge all the walls I’ve built up over the years, and you make me want to tear them all down for you. It’s both maddening and terrifying at the same time"
I kiss the tip of his nose.
"Why do you have to be so damn gentle?" he whispers.
"Just with you" I whisper back.
I feel his facial expression soften under my touch, Even though he's always portrayed as cold and aloof, knowing the effect I have on him. He gently grabs my wrist, leaving my hands still on his cheeks.
"You're such a bad influence on me, you know that?" His tone is half serious, half teasing.
"Oh, since we were fifteen" I joke and he lets out a low laugh, shaking his head in disbelief.
"You seem positively gleeful about it too. My little troublemaker" He squeezes my wrists lightly. Keeping his hold on me. He steps closer to me, closing the distance between our bodies. "You shouldn't have this much power over me..." He whispers and closes his eyes for a few seconds. "Why can't I resist you?" He murmurs, his voice laced with both frustration and longing.
"Well, I think it's because of how pretty I am," I say and he laughs lowly, opening his eyes, meeting my gaze again.
"Well it's certainly not because of your modesty" He jokes with a smile.
"Or maybe you can't resist me because of the way I do your favorite foods, or I take care of your wounds." I list and he raises an eyebrow.
"Oh, so you think you've won me over with your cooking skills and your nursing abilities? just feeding and patching me up like a lost puppy?" he chuckles, trying to brush off the sincerity of your words.
"The way I take your cock" I whisper and see him choking on his breath, clearly not expecting me to say something so boldly. He looks away for a moment.
"You can't just blurt something like that out," he says, his voice slightly hoarse.
"How I take your backshots" I continue listing, a light blush on display on my face.
He groans, his eyes closing as your words continue to affect him. He's starting to lose his grip on his own self-control.
"Jesus Christ" he curses under his breath, not able to focus on anything but the images of my words planted on his head. He opens his eyes, his gaze locking onto mine. "you're trying to kill me, aren't you? driving me insane with those filthy words of yours"
He moves his hands from my wrist to my hips pressing me against him.
"I'm just listing why you can't resist me" I smirk.
He growls. "Well. your listing is not helping your case. If you keep going, I won't be able to hold back any longer" he says through gritted teeth.
"Yeah, what do you have in mind?"
He hesitates for a moment, and I sense his eyes roaming over my face and body.
"You really want to know what I have in mind?" He asks, his voice thick with desire.
"Maybe I can tell you what I have in mind" I whisper closer to his ear.
I feel the shiver that goes over his body as he feels my breath against his ear. "And what do you have in mind, princess?" he asks, his fingers digging into the flesh of my hips.
"Remember that big mirror I made install in front of the bed? the large one..." I hint, hoping he knows what I'm implying.
"Oh, the large mirror," he says with a sly smirk slowly spreading across his face. Knowing exactly what I'm implying. "You're playing a dangerous game here, you know that? Teasing me like this, whispering your dirty thoughts in my ear"
I hold his hand. intertwining our hands, walking him to our room. Once we are in the room, I make him sit on the bed, untying the strips of my bed dress and he holds my now just in underwear-covered hips.
"You're so damn beautiful" He murmurs under his breath, his eyes darkened with a mix of lust and admiration. He pulls me closer, making me straddle his lap. He ran his hands over my body, feeling the warmth of my skin under his fingers, His eyes roaming over every inch of me. "You drive me insane," He says through gritted teeth, his hands grabbing my ass now.
"I want you to fuck me Lando, I need it."
He groans, his grip on my ass tightening at my blunt words. "Princess you have no idea how much those words make me want to lose control" He murmurs, voice thick with raw hunger.
I kiss him, forcing his back to be on the bed.
He allows me to push him down into the bed, kissing me back fiercely, any remnants of his previous control completely gone now. Both of us are completely consumed by desire.
"Let me show you how proud i am to be yours" I whisper, my eyes on his, so he can see the truth in my words.
"You... you're proud to be mine?" his voice is laced with a hint of vulnerability.
"Always have" I whisper getting rid of his shirt.
He helps me discharging his shirt, his eyes never leaving mine. His hands moved to grip my waist too.
"on the bed" He whispers against my ear and I shiver from head to toe. I do as he says. "Good girl" He can tell I am growing impatient. "Doesn't the princess like to be teased?" He moves his finger from my neck to the waistband of my panties.
"No" I grind against him, trying to keep my composure. "Please Lando" I whisper, growing desperate for him to just touch me everywhere.
"So impatient..." he scatters kisses all over my neck "But since you've asked so nicely" he murmurs, his fingers slowly slipping underneath the fabric of the underwear.
"Please" I arch my back a bit "No teasing..." I hold his shoulders.
"Is that how you ask for something you want, princess?" his fingers now hovering over my folds. "You want me to touch you here?" he smirks and I nod frantically.
He flops me on the bed, my back now on the soft mattress, breaking the kiss to get rid of his clothes, leaving me to enjoy the view of him stripping the suit like he was burning, my hand unconsciously slipping down to my folds where his hand was a few seconds ago.
"What are you doing? he says when he notices my hand replacing the now empty spot. "Such a needy little princess, aren't you?" he smirks "On your fours," he says and I do. "Such a good girl", and seconds later, my panties are ripped out of my body.
He reaches out, his hand grabbing my hips. "I love how desperate you are for me, princess, you're all mine now" he whispers, positioned behind me, teasing my entrance.
"P-please lando" I move my head trying to catch sight of him, but I bury my face in the covers when I feel the sting of his hand against my ass. Making me let out a loud moan.
He grabs my hair in a ponytail and makes me look up. The sight of us in the mirror is arousing. "Look at us," he whispers right to my ear.
He starts to move, and my eyes close in pleasure. His moves are short and slow but hard, I could practically feel the budge on my stomach.
"F-faster" I lift my ass, looking at the reflection in the mirror, our bodies now made all one. He speeds the shots, my back arching.
"Does that feel good, princess?" he smacks my ass again and nod. "Words... I need words."
"Y-yes" I grip the sheets.
He pulls my hair a bit harder. "Look how pretty you look while taking me," he whispers, kissing my back. I want you to make a mess." He's now holding my face in the mirror's direction. "Look how pretty you are taking my cock" he slaps sighty my cheek.
I let out a ragged moan, feeling the heat pooling in my lower belly, knowing I was close.
"I'm c-close," I say, Trying to hold on.
He turns me around, laying me back on the bed again. Missionary this time.
"I want to see you come undone," he smirks, moving his hands to pay attention to my breast, but stops to guide my face to see us in the mirror again. "Look how good you look with me balls buried inside you" I clench around him and he moans.
A few seconds later I release, all over his cock. "La-lando" he keeps moving but I'm too sensitive. He takes his cock out to release on my stomach. I see everything in the reflection in the mirror.
"So pretty, my cum all over your body" he lays down beside me, both of us trying to even our breaths.
After a few minutes he cleans me up and we close our eyes to sleep.
#f1 smut#f1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#formula 1#formula one#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x reader#lando norris#mclaren#f1 2024#ln4#ln4 x reader#ln4 fic#ln4 imagine#ln4 mcl#lando norris smut#lando x reader#lando imagine#f1 x you#f1 imagine#lando norris imagine
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Exchange Part 4: Deal
~5k words, smut, male reader, barely proofread so be nice
It was only a month later before your modest life had turned incredibly lavish. Jisoo not only succeeded in landing you a fantastic promotion, but she also went above and beyond to make sure you got compensated more than you could have ever imagined - frankly more than you probably deserved, but who were you to complain?
What used to be your humble flat had been replaced by what was essentially an estate in an affluent South Korean neighborhood. People could work their entire lives and never be able to afford this, but for the most part, one evening was the reason you were here. Normally, living in a house this size would be rather lonely - fortunately for you there was company.
“You see Jennie’s latest CK ads?” The small girl asked casually as she scrolled through her phone, a cup of coffee in her other hand.
“Hard not to,” you replied. “They’re plastered all over my feed.”
“Girl would rather try convincing people to buy panties over being an idol at this point,” she sighed.
“Clearly it’s not working on you,” you commented as your eyes explored Lisa’s bare legs.
“Do you want me to put on some of Jennie’s panties?” Lisa smirked, putting down her coffee and uncrossing her legs. “I thought you preferred this,” she added as she spread her legs and started rubbing between her legs, using her fingers to cover herself up.
“I do, that’s why you’re still forbidden to wear pants when you’re in my house.”
“Is that right?” Lisa chuckled, crossing her legs again. “Since when is my body your property?”
“It goes both ways,” you replied, cocking an eyebrow in her direction. “Remember last weekend?”
“That’s different!” she whined, crossing her arms after tossing her phone onto the table. “I told you not to cum in her.”
“Baby it was one time, you-”
“Don’t ‘baby’ me,” Lisa growled. “We had a deal that night.”
“I’m sorry,” you apologized sarcastically before getting down on your knees in front of Lisa’s crossed legs. “Baby,” you teased, gently spreading her legs again.
“Shut up,” Lisa rolled her eyes, failing to hide her smile as she stood up from the chair and hopped onto the table. “Just hurry up, this coffee sucks.”
“Hey, I like this coffee…” you mumbled as you stood up from your knees and lowered your pants, tossing your shirt to the side.
“I’m just kidding,” Lisa chuckled. “It’s actually pretty good. I just want something else right now.”
“You’re always in the mood for that something else.”
“Are you complaining?”
“Does it look like I’m complaining?”
“Just hurry up and fuck me baby boy,” she groaned, losing any semblance of subtly, putting her heels up on the table.
“Don’t have to tell me twice,” you grunted as you pressed your tip against her pussy.
She was already somewhat wet - the girl always had sex on her mind. You lathered up her slick onto your shift, working quickly because you knew Lisa could get impatient. At times she enjoyed a bit of teasing, but you knew when she wanted to get on with it - this morning was one of those times.
Lisa’s pussy never failed to impress you with how tight it was. Even after weeks of fucking her little pussy, weeks of sex being a nearly daily activity for the two of you, it still surprised you each and every time your cock entered her body.
“Oh fuck yes, it’s been too long,” Lisa moaned softly, tilting her head back as your cock slid slowly into her tight pussy.
“It’s been less than half a day,” you moaned back, wrapping your arms around her lower back for leverage as you pushed all the way into her slowly.
“Too long,” she groaned, bringing one hand between her legs and rubbing her clit.
Even though you were worried that you would start to grow tired of Lisa's body, those fears never came to fruition. It turned out that depriving an idol of any sexual outlet for an extended period of time led to a great deal of stress, and Lisa was taking full advantage of you to make up for lost time. Even if she was just using you, it didn't particularly matter to you because the arrangement worked out well regardless.
Luckily for you, that made the sex amazing. Even now, with Lisa leaning back on the table, with your hips pushing into her pussy, she managed to move her body back and forth alongside you. Laziness was not in her vocabulary - no matter what position she was in she was able to make it that much better for you through sheer physical talent. It motivated you, drove you to new levels. It made you want to fuck her harder every single time your cock blessed her soft body.
“Harder baby,” Lisa groaned softly, closing her eyes, hands gripping the edge of the table to support her shaking body. “Fuck me harder.”
Satisfying the tight Thai girl was your favorite activity. Her pleasure became your only goal. Your motivation. Your balls slapped against her skin each time your cock dove into her pussy. The combination of her dripping pussy and the beads of sweat forming on her skin was a recipe for the most mind-boggling elation.
Her pussy eventually began to gush all over your cock, adding more of her natural lubricant which somehow barely made it easier to fuck her. She was tight. Each thrust took effort - true conviction. The wet slapping of skin on skin fueled your urges, kept you going, pushed you deeper than you thought possible, aided by her drenched body.
A singular word escaped her lips, a whisper that could be heard across the room and in every room, as her body fell backwards onto the table.
“Fuck.”
The readjustment of her position gave you the tiniest pause which you used to regain some semblance of control over your own orgasm. You took both of her ankles in your palms and lifted her legs up, resting them on your shoulders, before leaning forward slightly. With her legs to the roof, body bent almost in half, you resumed your work.
This new angle was perfect - evident by Lisa’s sudden onset of squeals. The barrage of shrieks attacked your ears as your cock rubbed against her most sensitive spot. You had learned what worked best on Lisa thanks to the excessive amount of experience the two of you had together, and this was exactly what she needed right now.
“I’m…”
“Me too,” you grunted in response before leaning forward, bending her body entirely in half, her thighs pressing against her abs. You leaned forward a bit more until your lips found her mouth.
As your tongue entered her mouth, you immediately realized your mistake; Her body had become too much for you. The sensation of her tight pussy had already pushed you dangerously close, but Lisa’s kiss launched you right over the edge with no chance for you to hold back. The last thing you could consciously do was latch onto Lisa’s body, allowing her vibrations to be felt directly on your skin.
The satisfaction of your cock filling Lisa’s pussy numbed your mind, your cum gushing deep inside her body. It was becoming difficult to continue, yet your hips kept thrusting on autopilot. Each spurt of cum was proceeded with another thrust. It almost felt embarrassing finishing this abruptly - but then you felt her.
Lisa’s pussy began squeezing your shaft. Perfectly timed, you thought to yourself as your hips tried their hardest to desperately continue pumping her tight pussy. It was, however, futile. Physically you had nothing left, and all you could do was lay there as Lisa’s pussy convulsed. It was like all your energy flew into Lisa’s body through your cum, now it was time to just enjoy Lisa’s body while having no control over your own.
Thankfully, based on the breaths she let into your mouth, she was in her own little world now. She rode it out for what felt like minutes, maybe even hours, probably not, pressing each individual nerve in your cock over and over with her tight warmth. When you eventually felt her body finally start to relax, finally start to calm down, you very carefully and slowly withdrew your cock, her pussy squeezing your exit, fighting to keep your softening shaft inside her.
Both of you desperately tried to catch your breath, gasping as if you ran marathons, still holding onto each other, your cum slowly leaking out of her. It took a moment, time you used to gently press your mouth against her warm skin.
“Can you… come with me… to the… office…?” Lisa panted, her chest heaving up and down on the table.
“Sure,” you answered between the kisses you were planting over Lisa’s neck, taking the second your lips left her neck to speak. “You’ve. Been. Excessively. Horny.”
“It’s…” Lisa sighed before mustering up the strength to pull herself up and sit straight. “It’s for Jisoo, she needs to tell you something.”
“Huh? Why didn’t she send me a message directly?” you asked while backing up slightly so that Lisa could hop off the table.
“Because it was my suggestion,” Lisa answered while taking a seat and pulling you closer to her.
“Suggestion for what?”
Lisa ignored the question as she became occupied with using your cock to probe the inside of her mouth.
“Lisa, what suggestion?” you repeated, flinching as your extremely sensitive tip hit the inside of her cheek.
“Can a girl suck some cock in peace?” she whined, brows furrowed in frustration as she glared up at you.
All you could do was chuckle at the absurdity.
“Thank you,” Lisa added cheerily before putting her lips against your shaft, licking up whatever combination of fluids had accumulated.
Her lust for your cock was probably one of her most endearing qualities. She could never have enough, once a day wasn’t even enough. Rarely did you sleep without Lisa at least giving you a blowjob, it was like she needed your cum to survive. You couldn’t help but feel your insides warm up at the sight of her cute little tongue poking away at your tip.
“Mwah!” she exaggerated a final kiss on your cock before smiling brightly up at you, finally content. “Now, what were you asking me?”
“The suggestion?”
“Oh, here let me show you,” she replied before opening her mouth wide and leaning over to throat your cock again.
“Lisa, seriously,” you stopped her with your hands.
“You’re no fun,” she pouted, crossing her arms. “Fine, she’ll tell you herself.”
“When do you have to get to the office?”
“Whenever I want, it’s not like we make music anymore.”
“Alright,” you sighed. “Since you already got me hard again…”
She laughed loudly before grabbing your cock in one hand and moving her lips forward.
“Now who’s excessively horny?” Lisa chuckled before slipping your cock down her neck in a single movement.
—
“Well aren’t you a sight for sore eyes. Loving the suit.”
“Rosie, it’s great to see you again,” you smiled as you entered the room. You gave her a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek before looking around. “Did Lisa send me to the wrong room? Where’s Jisoo?”
“Oh she’ll be right back,” Rosé replied. “I think she’s changing her dress.”
“Speaking of dresses, you look absolutely stunning right now,” you admired her long, strapless, black dress which showcased her frame beautifully with plenty of skin showing around her chest and hips as the fabric made an “x” across her torso.
“I decided I’d show myself off tonight, hopefully inspire some of the useless men to stop being so useless.”
“What’s happening tonight, why are you all getting so dressed up anyway?” you asked as you took her hand and made her twirl for you.
“Says the guy literally wearing a three piece,” Rosé shook her head playfully. “Did Lisa not tell you?”
“Nope, in her defense her mouth was pretty preoccupied this morning,” you replied. “All she said was to get dressed up.”
“Cheeky bastard,” Rosé laughed. “We’re going to another party tonight, to celebrate Jisoo’s news.”
“Oh right, I forgot they moved it to Friday,” you said, remembering the invite you received earlier this week. After getting your promotion, you were invited to the weekly party with full VIP access, but you haven’t attended one ever since that night you met Lisa. According to the girls, they generally weren’t worth it most of the time, not unless there was a special occasion.
Before the conversation could continue, the door swung open and Jisoo barged in. She had her head tilted while adjusting her earring, completely flustered but also unrealistically beautiful in her black and red dress.
“One simple request is all-” Jisoo began ranting before stopping in her tracks at the sight of you. She immediately forgot about whatever she was upset about and ran up to you, jumping into your arms. “Thank you for coming!”
“It’s my pleasure,” you said as her perfume hit your nose. She smelled even better than she looked right now, and you refused to let go of her as the flowery scent engulfed your senses.
“Well, I’ll leave you two to it,” Rosé giggled before leaving the room, finally bringing you back to your senses and ending the embrace.
“I heard you had some news to share,” you said softly while holding Jisoo’s arms.
“The songs are done,” she beamed up at you, that contagious smile making your heart flutter.
“Songs? As in multiple? Already?”
“Two,” she announced happily.
“Jisoo, that's amazing!” you pulled her into another hug and started patting her back. “I’m so proud of you!”
“I still owe credit to you,” she giggled.
“Absolutely not,” you pulled apart and took hold of her hands. “This was all you.”
“Either way, you helped inspire the title track’s name,” she smiled warmly, giving your hands a little squeeze.
“How so?”
“You’ll find out when they come out,” she replied before leaning closer to you.
It was instinctual, for the first time since that party, your body met with Jisoo’s. Your lips pressed effortlessly against each other’s, the beautiful aroma she wore blessing your senses once more. It felt so right kissing Jisoo, an oddly unexplainable passion between your bond.
“I’m so proud of you,” you whispered right in front of her face as your lips parted.
She answered by leaning forward again, kissing you softly, her hand wrapping around the back of your shoulders, forcing your own hands to naturally grab her waist. The two of you kept the kiss going, even as you pushed back, now making her lean slightly backwards, keeping her body up with your hands.
The beautiful moment was shattered as the two of you jolted away from each other at the sound of a loud crash in the room. You both turned towards the noise to see Rosé awkwardly standing in front of a tipped chair.
“Oops,” she giggled, holding up her purse. “My bad, forgot my bag.”
Jisoo chuckled before letting go of your shoulders and walking over to the dresser in the corner of the room.
“Thanks again for coming, I’ll see you later tonight?” Jisoo asked, turning her head just slightly enough for you to see her side profile.
“Absolutely.”
—
“No random whores.”
“I would never.”
“If I find a single one putting her hands on you-”
“Sweetie, you’re the only whore I want,” you whispered mockingly, giving Lisa a small poke in the ribs.
“Not funny.”
“I’m sorry baby, I didn’t mean it,” you teased, leaning into her until she was on her back.
“Call me that again and you won’t be touching any girls tonight,” Lisa glared at you, trying to stop herself from laughing as your fingers attacked her sides.
“Don’t worry, if she won’t let you have fun, you can always spend time with me,” Jennie interjected from across the limo.
“Is that so?” you chuckled, sitting back up and turning to look at Jennie. “You make it sound like you’re the one doing me the favor, as if it’s not the other way around?”
“Please, I’ll have a line of men waiting for me the second I enter this stupid event,” Jennie scoffed, crossing her arms. “I don’t need you.”
“Sure, but we both know you’re going to be complaining about each and every one of them.”
“Absolutely not.”
“You will,” Rosé chimed in from her seat next to Jennie. “We’ve all heard it before, and then you’re probably going to be begging for him to put it in your ass again.”
“What are you-” Jennie’s face turned bright red.
“You wouldn’t stop talking about that night for days after the last party we went to,” Rosé continued nonchalantly, taking a sip of champagne. “Oh Lisa when are you bringing him around again… Lisa is he coming tonight… Lisa-”
“Shut up,” Jennie cut her off, trying to hide her embarrassment desperately, but even in the dimly lit limo it was clear as day. “You complain about them just as much as I do.”
“Begging, you say?” your lips curled up at the sides, trying to stifle your laughs. “I like the sound of that.”
“I was not begging.”
“She was,” Rosé and Lisa both said in unison.
“That’s adorable,” you teased, holding your hand against your chest. “I’m touched.”
“Not begging.”
“So you’re saying you don’t want me to spend time with you tonight?”
“That’s not what I’m saying,” Jennie quickly replied, perhaps a bit too quickly, the blush on her cheeks burning redder.
“What are you saying exactly?” you smirked at her.
“I…” she froze, too embarrassed to finish her sentence.
“I wanna hear this begging, maybe then you’ll get what you want,” you laughed, enjoying every second of Jennie’s embarrassment. “Maybe.”
Jennie’s shoulders slumped forward as she left out a hefty sigh before mustering up some strength and sitting up straight.
“Oh my God, pick literally anyone else, why do you have to take my entertainment,” Lisa laughed, sitting back up and leaning her head on your shoulder.
“Is that what I am, your entertainment?” you responded while reaching your arm around her body, moving her face from your shoulder to your chest.
“Yes, exactly,” she replied immediately before turning back to Jennie. “I’ll make you a deal.”
“Go on,” Jennie leaned back against her seat, just as curious as you were about what Lisa had in mind.
“He can have my blessing to do whatever he wants with you tonight,” Lisa continued. “If you let him finish on your face before we enter tonight.”
Rosé nearly threw her flute in an attempt to prevent a spill as she burst out laughing, quickly covering her mouth.
“Lisa! There are always cameras waiting outside, I can’t do that,” Jennie protested.
“Then keep your head down,” Lisa giggled, rubbing her hand on your crotch. “As long as there’s a fresh load plastered all over your face, I’m happy.”
“It’s not like it’ll be the only load on your face tonight,” Rosé snickered, finally composing herself enough to speak up. “Lisa, I think it’s a great idea.”
“Thanks Rosie,” Lisa smiled. “So, what do you say?”
“I am not leaving this limo with cum on my face.”
“Then I guess you’ll have to find your own entertainment tonight,” Lisa taunted, rubbing her hand on your crotch. “This one’s all mine.”
“Oh come on, it’s like a two second walk to the door and we all try to hide our faces anyway,” Rosé attempted to convince her. “No one’s even going to see anything.”
“It just feels so wrong,” Jennie sighed, looking directly at you. “You’re fine with this? Knowing if people see me leave this limo with my face plastered and only one man gets out with me…”
Without even responding, you turned to Lisa and gave her a kiss.
“That answers that,” Rosé giggled.
“Lisa are you fucking serious, this is what you want?”
“I don’t remember stuttering,” Lisa replied casually. “Come on, we’re not even that far, the clock is ticking.”
“Unbelievable,” Jennie muttered as she got off her seat and onto her knees in front of you. She reached forward for your buckle when your hands instinctively grabbed her. “How can you possibly be shy, you have literally fucked each of us,” Jennie laughed.
“Multiple times,” Rosé chimed in, leaning back, all excited for the upcoming show.
“I’m not shy, I just-”
“Look at me,” Lisa whispered, each syllable dripping with sensualism, as she gently used her hand to turn your face towards her. “Keep your eyes on mine the whole time,” she commanded, eye contact locked on you. With one hand she motioned for Jennie to get started. “Don’t look at her even a single time.”
As Jennie started to undo your pants and pull them down to your knees, you followed Lisa's instructions and kept your eyes locked on hers. You didn't even look when you felt fingers clutch your shaft or when Jennie's tongue made contact with your cock a second later.
Her eyes remained fixed on you. That expression, so dispassionate, gave you the impression that she was in charge - not the girl sucking your cock. You met her gaze with a direct stare. Only when you weren't actively pushing your cock into her could you see the sweet, loving, and caring side of Lisa. The side of Lisa you could see behind her warm eyes.
It seemed as though you raised your hands to her face in silence. The infrequent slurps from Jennie's mouth were less noticeable than Lisa's lips, which were what truly captured your attention. Those velvety lips that begged for more. She leaned forward into you as you leaned forward - something Lisa never instructed you to do, something she didn’t need to tell you.
When your lips met, your eyes instinctively closed. Lisa didn't object; she kissed you back with the same fervor. Your whole body started to heat up, whether it was the kiss, the girl on her knees between your legs, or perhaps the alcohol was catching up to you. In reality, you knew Lisa’s passion was the cause.
Jennie’s slurps were becoming overwhelmingly loud. Your cock was completely covered in her saliva as she used her mouth to play with your tip while her hand stroked you as fast as she could. She knew you were getting close, she could feel it, and she was right.
There was no way your cock would hold on much longer, especially not while Lisa’s tongue invaded your mouth. For the second time today, kissing Lisa was going to launch you right over the edge, shattering any hopes of extending the current situation. You waved your arm in Jenne’s direction, barely making contact with her head.
She understood the cue and took her mouth off your tip, keeping pace with her hand as she tilted her face towards the roof of the limo. She held herself perfectly steady in your peripheral vision, struggling to keep a solid grip on your cock thanks to all the spit she had left on it.
Lisa could also feel your climax coming as she let go of you and went back to staring directly into your eyes. Her hand reached down, joining Jennie’s hand, and started to fondle your balls.
That was it, that did it for you.
Even without seeing it, you knew that first gush of cum made a line all the way across Jennie’s face. The shocked squeal she let out also confirmed it. Your cock started pulsing, unloading the warm cum presumably all over Jennie’s face. You kept pumping away, while staring Lisa in the eyes, her deadly gaze had softened considerably and she was even smiling warmly now. As the final dribbles of cum spilled out of your cock, you felt Jennie’s hand leave your shaft.
“Go ahead and look at your masterpiece,” Lisa whispered, her hand still fondling your balls.
In front of you, with her eyes still closed, was Jennie with her face shining. There were linear streaks of white all over her face, with a considerable amount getting into her hair. You didn’t realize just how big of a load you blew onto her face it was until now.
“Wow,” you muttered softly, earning a laugh from Rosé who you just now noticed was using a tissue to wipe her arm. “Did I?”
“Yes you did,” Rosé snapped immediately before laughing again.
“Don’t wipe any of it off,” Lisa instructed Jennie before bending over your lap and going for any of the white mess that didn’t make it onto Jennie’s face.
“I fucking hate you,” Jennie whined, looking at herself on her phone. “You got so much into my hair.”
“S-Sorry,” you gasped, Lisa’s tongue offering no reprieve as it attacked your sensitive tip.
“He’s not sorry at all,” Rosé added between laughs. “Look at him, he’s ready to give you round two.”
“My fault,” Lisa smirked as she sat back up, holding your once-again erect cock in her hand. “We’ll have to deal with this later, we’re here.”
-
“That was humiliating,” Jennie whined, touching up her makeup after tossing away the tissues she used to wipe her face clean. “I think one of them saw.”
“It wasn’t even that bad,” Rosé giggled, handing Jennie a brush for her hair. “And there’s no way anyone saw, I’ve never seen you run that fast in my life.”
“Are you kidding? Did you hear the shit they were saying,” Jennie grumbled. “It’s fine when I’m inside, but who knows who those people out there are, they don’t get to see me like that.”
“They weren’t saying anything, calm down.”
“I’m sorry babe,” Lisa purred as she gently stroked your cock. “I know what can make you feel better though.”
“I’m not even in the mood anymore,” Jennie scoffed, putting the brush down.
“Jennie? Are you actually upset?” Lisa asked, pausing her handjob, suddenly full of concern.
“She’s just being dramatic,” Rosé chuckled before grabbing Jennie’s hand. “Come on, let’s go get you some alcohol,” she added as she pulled Jennie out of the room. She paused at the door to look back at you and Lisa with a wink.
“She’s fine,” you tried to reassure Lisa as she looked at you.
“You’re probably right,” she sighed. “But you should not be able to speak right now,” she added before replacing her graceful strokes with aggressive pumps. “Come on baby, cum for me.”
The next couple of minutes were a blur. You remembered her hand, you remembered her kissing your neck, but nothing else was in your head right until you felt warmth shooting out of your cock.
“Lisa,” you huffed, turning to the girl as she wiped her hand clean. “You sure you’re okay with me fooling around with her tonight?”
“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” she cocked an eyebrow at you.
“Just making sure, I’ve never done anything without your permission before.”
“Right… and you have my permission tonight,” Lisa replied slowly, smiling in a confused manner at you. “I know it’s a bit unorthodox, but really I wouldn’t put you in this situation if I wasn’t okay with it.”
“Unorthodox…” you repeated slowly. “Sometimes I wonder how I lucked out so hard to have such a wild life,” you laughed, grabbing Lisa by her waist.
“It’s not that wild,” Lisa giggled as you pulled her close. “A bit of meaningless fucking never hurt anyone.”
“Speaking of meaningless fucking…”
“Not yet,” Lisa stopped you as you kissed her neck.
“Whoa, did baby girl just say no to sex? There’s really a first for everything.”
“I did not say no,” Lisa scoffed. “I just don’t want my makeup all messed up just yet,” she added coyly.
“Who said I have to mess up your makeup?”
“I did, because that’s exactly what you’re going to do later tonight when you fuck my throat.”
“You’re going to say that and then keep me waiting.”
“You just came twice in like fifteen minutes, a break wouldn’t hurt,” Lisa laughed as she wiped you clean with a tissue.
“As if that’s out of the norm,” you chuckled. “How about I eat you out.”
“That’s a nice offer, but we’ll do all that properly later tonight,” Lisa giggled before getting up and running to the door. “Go find where those two just went, or look for Jisoo, she’s probably bored out of her mind being here all alone for so long. I gotta meet up with a couple of my friends, they said they’d be here.”
“Wait, you want me… without you?”
“Why are you pretending like you forgot how to use your dick,” Lisa chuckled, wearing a confused expression again as she looked at you.
“Lisa…” you paused to stand up and walk over to her. “Ever since that night I met you, I’ve never touched any of them without you being there.”
She gave you a small bend of her head and the cutest eyes in the world.
“Baby,” she hesitated. “I’ve never thought about that, but you’re right.”
“Are you still fine with it?”
“Of course,” Lisa smiled warmly. “I guess you’re unofficially joining our agreement, nothing that happens at these parties can be held against you. Only my bandmates though, I meant what I said about no random whores.”
“I’m fine with that,” you leaned forward and kissed her cheek before grabbing a handful of her ass. “I’m going to be thinking of you the whole time though.”“Awhh baby, that sounds so wrong, but it’s strangely sweet,” Lisa giggled, wrapping her arms around your neck. “And all night I’m going to be thinking of how you’re going to fuck my throat later.”
---
A/N:
Honestly, ending this chapter way earlier than I had planned because I want to try staying near that 5k word mark, and there wouldn't be a better place to pause. I have the entire plan for the next chapter already good to go, just gotta finish writing it, all I'll say is next chapter will most likely be when some stupid romantic lovey-dovey bs happens, and obviously more smut.
Now the thing that everyone keeps asking me. "WHEN ARE YOU UPDATING, WHEN IS NEW CONTENT COMING, WHERE ARE YOU". I am still alive <3, I've been trying to update you guys when I can, I'm still just busy with life. I don't have much time to work on my writing nowadays, but let me try giving you an update. I know this chapter is going to feel kinda short, just bear with me! Hopefully the next chapter will come out with a shorter break!
Currently still working on like 5 different pieces. My next upload might just be the next chapter of this story. If not this story, my guess would be Karina (+Winter). Very unlikely the Twice story will get an update next, and somewhat unlikely the LSFM story will get an update next. It's possible, but those two stories get a bit more effort on my end in terms of long-term plot, so it'll depend on how much time and energy I have to write.
As always, feel free to give any feedback you feel like giving. I still value it, even though this hobby is taking a bit of a back seat for me. I am fairly certain the quality of writing is not as good, but it's okay, I know I'm busy and it's just a casual way for me to release some of my horniness into the world. I don't take this hobby too seriously!
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Champagne Problems | Bucky Barnes x Reader
Oh, hi! Truly, sometimes you just don't know the answer till someone's on their knees and asks you, you know? Also I hope my taglist works this time but who the fuck knows.
Word Count: 9.1k
Warnings: engagement / wedding talk, mentions of alcohol
Nat flipped through your list of invitees, crossing off a few names as she scanned the page. She took it upon herself to help you stuff, address, and mail the invitations for your engagement party, because in her words, you were “dragging your feet”. There were only five or so weeks left until the event, and you just hadn’t found the time to sit down and sort out the invitations. At least, that’s the excuse you told Nat- and yourself.
“Okay, we’re finally making some progress, we’re about halfway done,” Nat called from the dining table. “Shit. Without me, no one would even show up to this fucking party.” She didn’t mean for you to hear that second part- but her voice echoed through your nearly empty apartment.
Almost everything you owned was gone; either sold, or stored, or moved into the house you were to share with your fiancé, Cole. All that remained was your clothes, your bed, and a few odds and ends. It would’ve been far easier, far more convenient, to stay in your new house instead of living out of cardboard boxes. And far more aesthetically pleasing. The house was a nice- nicer than you’d ever be able to afford yourself. And it was beautiful. There was a lush garden in the backyard. A swing on the front porch. Even a white picket fence. You described it to everyone as “picturesque.”
But the lease on your apartment wasn’t up quite yet. You still had a few weeks until your move-out date, and you wanted to soak in as much time at the old place as you could. You loved it here. Loved the worn wooden floors and the doors that didn’t hang straight. The dent in the wall where Bucky bonked his metal elbow when you popped out of the hall closet and scared him. The corner in your bedroom where you and Bucky made a blanket fort during last winter’s blizzard. Memories papered the walls and covered the floors of this place- and most of them involved Bucky.
This was home. And while the new house was great- and fully paid for by your fiancé’s wealthy parents- it didn’t feel like you belonged there. It didn’t welcome you in or fill you with warmth. Cole’s mom said it just needed the right décor. Your friends told you it needed time. But deep down, you knew that no amount of beautiful area rugs, no amount of time, could turn your house with Cole into a home. There would always be one thing missing, one glaring and flagrant void.
Bucky.
“You’re inviting Bucky?” Nat looked up from the list and found you coming around the corner with a bowl of popcorn in hand. Her incredulous expression nearly stopped you in your tracks.
You gave her a strange look, “Yeah, of course. He’s my best friend. Why wouldn’t he be invited?”
“Okay, first of all,” Nat scoffed, “He’s your best friend- present company excluded. And second, do you really think that’s a good idea?”
You threw a few pieces of popcorn into your mouth as you settled into your chair. “Why wouldn’t it be?”
Nat rolled her eyes, “Because I don’t think it’s smart to invite the guy you’re actually in love with to a party celebrating your engagement to another man.” She threw you a shrug, “but hey, that’s just me.”
“Woah-” you almost choked on your popcorn. “I’m not in love with Bucky.”
It was the most absurd thing Nat had ever heard. “I’m not in love with Bucky!” she jeered, imitating your voice. “Yeah, right.”
“Okay, okay, jesus,” you raised your hands, miming a surrender. “I did- at one point- have romantic feelings for him,” you conceded, “but that was a while ago.”
“Oh, at one point?” Nat crossed her arms over her chest. “You say that like you had a small crush on him for a week, when we both know your ‘romantic feelings’ have been a constant ever since you became friends with the guy.”
Her accusations weren’t necessarily wrong. But they were loud. And pointed. And rubbed salt in your many wounds. “It was …” you gave a small shake of your head. “We never got the timing right, you know? It just didn’t work in our favor.” The heartache with which you’d grown familiar reared its ugly head. “But it’s fine,” you told her. “I’m engaged, now. So.”
Ever since you boyfriend, Cole, became your fiancé, you’d done your best to kill and bury your longing for Bucky. But your feelings for him weren’t so easily vanquished. They were strong and boisterous and loud. At least a few times a day, they launched themselves at you out of nowhere. At work. At the grocery store. At dinner with Cole and his parents. Nowhere was safe. Everywhere you went, things reminded you of Bucky. Of your favorite person. Of the person to whom you were not engaged.
The desperate pining for him tore your still-healing wounds wide open. Every time your gaze landed on your engagement ring, every time a friend mentioned your impending wedding, a sharp pain sliced through your chest. And each time, you were forced to acknowledge the fact that you were not, in fact, getting married to Bucky.
“Um, anyway…” you cleared your throat, “Of course, I’m inviting Bucky. And the subject isn’t open for debate, by the way. It’s my party and I’ll invite who I want to.”
You grabbed an invitation and a blank envelope from the stacks in front of Nat and positioned them in front of you. If Nat didn’t want you inviting Bucky, there was a more than significant chance that she’d conveniently “forget” to address an invite for him. And so, you scrawled his name and address onto an envelope and affixed a stamp in the corner. Come hell or high water, he was going to get his invitation. Even if he didn’t want to come.
The night of the party arrived sooner than you expected. Sooner than you’d hoped.
The house was abuzz with people running in and out, carrying food and linens and liquor; you knew you’d be requiring the latter in order to survive the night. Florists arrived to cover the house in perfect, beautiful blooms. A team of caterers brought with them enough fine food to feed an army. And a flawless, two-tiered cake with delicate lacy piping sat on the dining room table, complete with yours and Cole’s initials. All of it was perfect. Picturesque, really. It was exactly what you wanted- but Cole wasn’t who you wanted it with.
Every few minutes, you checked your phone in search of a text from Bucky. The deadline to RSVP had come and gone almost two weeks ago, and he never gave you an answer one way or another. He ignored your “hey, are you coming to my party?” texts, and your “just wanted to know if you plan on coming to the party” voicemails. He ignored almost all of your correspondence, actually.
Lately, he’d only been answering about a third of your texts and a quarter of your calls. It was unlike him. It was unheard of, really. On multiple occasions in the past, he answered your calls while taking heavy fire; you could actually hear the bullets whizzing by on his end of the line. But now, things were quiet. And you forced yourself to accept that fact that he was not coming to your party.
The festivities kicked off around seven-thirty, and you found your house full to the brim with party goers. All of Cole’s friends showed up. His childhood friends, his college buddies, his old soccer team- they all arrived with bells on. And your friends were well represented, too. High school pals, your book club, a close coworker or two. They were all so excited to see you, so happy that you found someone.
Even Bucky’s teammates made an appearance. They were his friends first, of course, but growing close with him meant growing close to them. And you’d build unbreakable bonds with Sam, Nat, Wanda, and Maria. They were thrilled for you and more than happy to attend your party- even if Bucky wouldn’t be there.
With your house so full, so jam-packed with friends, you thought you wouldn’t notice the pain of Bucky’s absence. But you did. Of course, you did. And you found yourself feeling painfully alone in a sea of people.
Without Bucky there, the night seemed to fall flat. The flowers lost their vibrance. The food was bland. And the music sounded disjointed and off-tempo. Things just weren’t the same.
People swarmed you every few seconds, hollering their congratulations and asking to see the ring again. They asked you about venues and dresses, bridesmaids and center pieces. Everyone meant well- you knew they did. But as the throngs of people refused to relent with their questions about table linens, your chest began to tighten. A hard, concrete cast wrapped itself around your lungs, preventing them from expanding. A suffocating lack of oxygen rendered your dizzy. It was all too much. The people and the music and the impending nuptials. Even the sensation Cole’s hand on your waist was too much, too tight, too smothering.
With a whispered “be right back”, you moved swiftly through the crowd and escaped out the front door. If you could just get some space, some quiet, some oxygen, you’d be fine.
The door provided you with much needed support as you tilted and teetered on unsteady feet. The panic, the alcohol, the high heels- it all combined to form a dizzying, possibly lethal combination. But at least you were outside. As least you were free. The cool night air prickled at your skin, and finally, your lungs filled to capacity. A few deep inhales cleared the fog from your mind. With closed eyes, you tipped your head back against the door and let yourself enjoy the quiet. Sure, the music from your playlist leaked into the night air, but this was the closest thing to silence you’d experienced all night. And you were not going to complain.
As your heartbeat slowed, you told yourself it would be okay. That everything was going to be fine. That you’d figure out how to handle the situation. And, if only for a moment, you actually believed your fabrications. A sense of peace wrapped around you like a blanket, and a welcome calm settled into your bones.
But the creak of a porch step yanked your eyes open.
And there you found Bucky, frozen on the second to last stair, with giftbox in hand. He eyed you as though he were a prey animal, wondering if you’d seen him, waiting for his chance to escape. But it was too late; he’d been caught.
“Buck?”
He forced a smile, “Hey.”
“Hi!” you launched yourself at him, wrapping your arms around his neck with an intensity that would’ve injured a mere mortal. He reeled back a few paces as your momentum knocked into him. “I’m so glad you’re here! didn’t think you were coming!”
His arms draped loosely- weakly- behind your back. It wasn’t much- but it was better than no Bucky at all. And after he failed to respond to your messages, didn’t answer your calls, and made himself scarce over the last few months, you’d take whatever you could get.
“Right. Yeah. Well, technically, I’m not-” He untangled himself from your arms and pointed at the perfectly wrapped giftbox. “I just wanted to drop off your present.”
“Oh, thanks. That’s-” Dismay dripped from your words, “Wait, you’re not staying?”
Bucky gave a shake of his head. He avoided your eyeline and chose, instead, to look at anything other than you. The grass. The porch light. His own shoes. “I can’t, sorry.”
It crushed you. Having him stop by for only a moment was far worse than him not showing up at all. Because now, you had to deal with the loss. The pain of his departure. For him to grant you the warmth of his presence, only to snatch it away moments later was almost cruel. How could he leave when you were finally seeing the world in color? How could he go when the music finally made sense with him by your side?
You didn’t want to beg. Didn’t want to make him feel bad. Didn’t want to seem pathetic. But the words slipped out of your mouth before you could stop yourself. “You can’t stay for even a little while?”
The disappointment in your voice broke his heart. And he had half a mind to forget his plan and allow you to escort him inside. But he stood firm. “I would,” he shoved his hands into his pockets. “But I have to go pick up a friend from the airport.”
The words hit you in a strange place. A pin-prick pain nipped at your chest- you’d caught him in a lie. “Buck, no offense, but all your friends are inside.” You gestured toward the house with a nod of your head. It was true- all of Bucky’s closest friends were dancing the night away in your living room. And he was caught red handed.
“Right…” His teeth dug into the smooth flesh of his cheek; his eyes roamed the yard. He should’ve known better than to use such a lame excuse- he did know better. He couldn’t casually lie around you; you knew him too well. But the pressure got to him, and forced cracks into his cool, marble surface. He hadn’t even expected to see you tonight, let alone talk to you. The painful awkwardness of the moment ate through him like acid.
“So… you can stay?” Your words came out too desperate, too expectant. But you couldn’t help it. You’d do anything to get him to hang around- even if he didn’t seem excited about it. Hell, you’d beg him on your knees if that’s what it took. Anything to get him to stay.
“Uh, yeah,” he shrugged. “I guess I can.”
Finally, he let his eyes land on you. After choosing to avert his gaze for so long, he wasn’t strong enough to do so any longer. He had to look at you, to take in every detail of your face. But as he drank you in slowly, inch by inch, in the light of the full moon, a strange solemnity sunk its teeth into him. Perfectly imperfect curls framed your face. A flawless diamond sat at the hollow of your throat. You were even wearing his favorite lipstick of yours- the one he said made you look like a vintage Hollywood star. He eyed your delicate, lacy white dress. Your white strappy heels with bows on the ties. Your white nails. And the perfect, glistening diamond adorning the ring finger of your left hand.
Everything about you was so beautiful. So bridal. It made his chest tight.
“You look really nice,” he said, almost bashful. “Beautiful.”
“I, um- thanks. Thank you.”
This stupid white dress. With its stupid lace and its stupid pearls and its stupid bridal flare. You hated it. Resented it. Wanted to take scissors to its seams. But if you were to play the role of Cole’s blushing bride, you had to dress the part, didn’t you? You had to don your fiancée costume and take part in the production.
But, regardless of your feelings about the outfit, your heart still flared at Bucky’s compliment. One simple word of praise from him had such a startling, intense effect on you. And suddenly, you were in high school again. He filled you with a sense of giddy adoration that you hadn’t experienced since the tenth grade. This was the stuff of love notes stuffed into lockers. Of first kisses under the bleachers. But your feelings for him could never be as fleeting or as shallow as those of your youth. No, this was the stuff of forever.
“Hello?” Bucky gave you a wave. “You okay?”
An awkward laugh escaped your chest, “Yeah. Sorry, I kinda spaced out there for a second. Did you say something?”
“I said, what are you doing outside?” He eyed the packed house. Twinkling lights shone through the windows. Crowds of people danced and drank champagne. Music wafted through the air. “Shouldn’t you be in there? At the party? Cause, you know, it’s for you.”
Just the thought of going back to the party made your stomach turn. Part of you wondered if you might be able to hide outside all night; just stay in the yard until the festivities came to a close. Hell, maybe you could even run away. You could get pretty far if you started walking and didn’t look back. By the time the party ended, you could be deep in the heart of Brooklyn- you could be at Bucky’s.
“Yeah, no, I probably- I should be inside. But, I’m just…” you took in a sharp breath. It hitched in your windpipe and got stuck for a moment. “I got a little overwhelmed, you know? With the noise, and the people and the… everything. So, I came out here to-” To hide. To escape. To flee. “To get some air.”
Bucky could’ve sworn he sensed something lurking beneath your calm surface. It was the slightest change in your voice, the smallest twitch of your brow. He clocked the way your hands never stilled. The way your teeth dug into the inside of your cheek. Something was off.
He sat in the long silence, waiting for you to open the vault and show him your secrets. But the lock remained secure. You didn’t say anything else, didn’t hint at the source of your discontent. He eyed your manufactured smile, but couldn’t seem to crack it.
Things never used to be this way. He didn’t keep secrets from you, and you wouldn’t dream of hiding anything from him- there was no reason to. Neither of you had to fear judgement or ridicule from the other. Your most embarrassing stories, Bucky’s darkest thoughts- they were all safe with the other.
But an unfamiliar disconnect had pulled the two of you apart. And Bucky could no longer read your soul like a book.
“Everything’s okay, though. Right?” He eyed you with suspicion. With concern.
You nodded- maybe too fervently. “Yeah. For sure,” a fake smile stretched across your face, “Just stressed, I guess.”
“And he treats you right?” It was one of the things Bucky worried about most. Sure, the house was nice. And the ring was huge. But did Cole speak to you with kindness? Did he show you empathy and understanding? Did he make you feel safe?
“Yes.”
Bucky breathed a small sigh of relief. Knowing that Cole handled you with care brought a sliver of ease to his worried mind. “So, you’re happy then?”
It was all Bucky ever wanted for you. A safe life, a happy life. But the answer wasn’t yes or no. This was the farthest thing from a black and white situation. On more than one occasion, you told yourself to just be happy. You thought that if you willed it, if you said it with conviction- then it would be true. And the happiness you were supposed to feel around your fiancé would magically spring up around you. But it didn’t. Every day, you waited. Every day, you told yourself to just be fucking happy. Cole gave you everything. He was nice and agreeable and provided you with the resources to do anything you’d ever wanted. But the happiness never came. At one point, you decided you’d settle for contentment. But that too evaded you.
“Um, do you wanna sit?” It was the best subject change you could come up with on such short notice. “The porch is free. Come on.”
Before Bucky could respond, he found your fingers linked with his. Chills traveled up his arm, over his shoulder, and across his scalp. Even the most innocent of your touches sent his dopamine levels through the roof. He’d never experienced ecstasy like this ever before- and knew he never would again. Especially not after your wedding.
He knew it was selfish to feel anything less than happy for you. You were engaged, you were getting married- this was what you wanted. You wanted marriage. A lifelong partner. A “till death do us part” kind of relationship. And now, you finally had it. So, who was Bucky to ruin it for you? Who was he to hope that you’d leave Cole at the altar? He forbade himself from ever being that selfish. If he was truly your closest friend, he had to be happy for you- even if it meant that he could never be anything more than your friend.
With his hand in yours, you led Bucky to the porch. And regardless of the brand-new patio furniture Cole’s parents gifted you, you and Bucky opted to sit on the steps. Crickets chirped every now and again. A cool breeze wafted through the trees, rattling the leaves. Voices and music and the clatter of dishes seeped through the windows. You didn’t notice any of it.
Because, finally, you had what you wanted- if only for a moment.
It was the simplest, most innocent desire you’d ever had. To sit on the front steps with Bucky. To share a home with him. To drink coffee next to him on the porch each morning. To watch the rain from safety of your porch swing with Bucky’s head in your lap.
If you ignored the white dress and the engagement ring and the pop of champagne bottles, you could almost believe that this was Bucky’s house, too. That the two of you could go inside and retire to bed. That you could wake up in the morning, wrapped in his arms. You could almost believe it. Almost.
The two of you sat in silence, planning your words carefully. Conversation felt like a mine field, and one misstep could send either of you to your death. But the warmth radiating off Bucky’s his body wrapped you in a familiar comfort. The narrow steps didn’t provide much in the way of sitting room, forcing Bucky to sit almost shoulder to shoulder with you- not that he’d ever complain.
With every gust of wind, he caught a whiff of your perfume- the perfume he loved so much. The scent that often clung to his hair and weaved itself into the fabric of his clothes. It mixed with the smell of early spring- crisp air and new blooms. And he felt himself losing his resolve. He did his best to put distance between the two of you, to protect his heart and yours. But as you leaned your body against his and rested your head on his shoulder. He wondered why the fuck he’d ever leave your side.
You, too, lost all strength. And suddenly, you didn’t care about misspeaking.
“I miss you, Buck…” Present tense. Because, even with him next to you, you missed him. Missed the way things used to be. “I feel like I never see you anymore.”
Bucky nodded. “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry. I’ve been so busy with work, and trying to prove myself…” He let out a heavy sigh. Of course, regardless of his intentional distance from you, work really was killing him. “Everyone at SWORD is paranoid- they’re convinced that there’s a secret faction of Hydra growing within their organization.”
“Hmm, that’s so weird. I wonder why they’d be worried about that.” You gave bucky a nudge, and pulled a laugh- your favorite laugh- from his chest.
“Yeah, yeah,” he shot you an eye roll. “But you’re probably really busy, too. With all the wedding planning.”
His mention of the wedding shattered your perfect, maladaptive daydreams. All the noise from the party once again filled your consciousness. And the weight of Cole’s engagement ring felt like an anchor, dragging you down to the deepest, loneliest sea. Bucky wished he hadn’t brought it up as you removed your head from his shoulder.
“Oh, yeah, no. It’s been-” you felt yourself closing off a bit, and did your best to fight it. “I haven’t actually planned a single thing. At all. So.”
Bucky gave you a strange look. It wasn’t like you to put things off, to procrastinate. He knew you to be an organized, ahead of the curve type of person. You were always the one who had a plan, always the one who over-prepared. He figured that in the few months since your engagement, you’d have planned at least a few things- if not the entire wedding and honeymoon.
“Do you have a date at least?” He pulled out his phone, “I want to put it in my calendar.”
Bucky would be there to support you no matter what, even if watching you marry another man killed him.
“Um, no, there’s no date yet,” you said. “Cole’s parents belong to a really fancy country club and said we could get married there- it’s beautiful. All I have to do is contact the club’s event coordinator and figure out which days are available. I just-” you dropped your eyes to the ground, “I haven’t yet.”
Bucky didn’t like your downcast gaze or your uncertain voice. There was something eating at you- he’d bet his life on it. Maybe you were just overwhelmed. Maybe you felt like you were behind on all the decisions that needed to be made. Either way, he wanted to help.
He threw you a shrug. “Well, there’s no rush, is there?”
He took your left hand in both of his and gave it squeeze, but regretted the gesture when your engagement ring dug into his palm. You were getting married to someone else; he had to stop touching you like this. Had to stop treating you like you were still on the market. He didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or disrespect your relationship. And so, he dug his hands into his pockets.
“I mean some people don’t start planning right away, right?” He said, “They wanna take their time and enjoy the engagement for a while, and-
“I’m not.”
“You’re not what?”
“Enjoying my engagement.” You had half a mind to take off the ring and launch it into the street. You’d dreamed about doing so every day, actually. Dreamed of throwing it on the subway tracks. Or dropping it through a grate on the street.
Alarm ran through Bucky’s system like wildfire. “Is everything okay? Is it-”
Finally, you lifted your eyes and met Bucky’s stare.
“I don’t want to marry him.”
Bucky felt his brain short circuit. He forgot how to breathe, how to speak. His thoughts tangled themselves together in tight, writhing knots. Words bounced off the walls of his skull without meaning. This wasn’t what he’d expected you to say.
“Um, why-” he cleared his throat, “why not?”
He cringed at his own question. Maybe it wasn’t his business. Maybe you didn’t want to get into the details. But you were upset. And if there was any chance at all that you’d want to vent or use Bucky as a sounding board, he was going to listen.
But there was nothing for him to listen to. For a long time, you didn’t answer. Because to you, the answer was stupid. To you, it sounded like bullshit. Like you’d wasted Cole’s time and love and money. Like you were some noncommittal, unsure child. You rolled your eyes at yourself- as you had every day since Cole’s proposal.
“I just don’t- I don’t love him,” you finally said. “I’m not in love with him. I mean, don’t get me wrong, he’s great. He’s a really nice person…” And he was. He was kind. He was understanding. He was thoughtful. But he wasn’t the one- he wasn’t Bucky. “He hasn’t done anything wrong. And he’s given me- he’s given me everything. But, I just don’t love him like I-”
You stopped yourself. The words that danced on the tip of your tongue were too risky, too dangerous. You wrangled them before they had the chance to escape- before they had the chance to push Bucky away- and locked them behind bars.
But they screamed inside your mind. ‘I don’t love him like I love you’ echoed again and again, reverberating every few seconds. Part of you feared Bucky might hear it.
“Um, I don’t love him like-” you rerouted, “Like I always imagined. You know? I don’t feel the way I thought I would.”
Bucky considered your words for a long time. Unlike you, he didn’t think it was bullshit. Or stupid. Or childish. He set his feelings for you aside, not allowing them to cloud his judgement, and thought about your predicament.
“Well, you don’t have to, you know,” he finally said. “Marry him, I mean.”
You gave him a subtle nod. Maybe he was right. But a larger problem- a more important problem- loomed. And while you’d spent the past few months hemming and hawing about marrying Cole, there was another issue at hand that ate you alive every single day.
“Why have you been avoiding me, Buck?” It wasn’t angry. It wasn’t accusatory. You just needed to know.
For the third time that night, Bucky found himself caught red-handed. “What?”
“Ever since I got engaged, you’ve been avoiding me.”
The hurt in your voice was unmistakable. And though Bucky knew it was truth, his first instinct was to refute. To deny. To deflect.
“No, I haven’t. I’m not avoiding you,” he said, putting on an air of offense. “I’ve been busy with work and-”
“Don’t give me that.” Your heartbreak dissolved into cold, hard facts. Facts that Bucky couldn’t refute. “I used to see you almost every day. No matter how busy either of us got, we still saw each other all the time. We made time for each other. But ever since Cole proposed, you don’t answer my texts anymore. You don’t respond to my voicemails. I mean, I’ve only seen you-” The realization was startling. You knew Bucky had been distant, but as you quickly flipped through your memories of the past few months, you confirmed just how detached he’d been. “I’ve seen you twice. Including tonight.”
Bucky’s silence bit through your flesh.
Part of you didn’t want to ask. Didn’t want to know. But the question left your lips before you could stop it. “Buck, are you mad at me?”
He shook his head. “No, why would I be?”
“Because Cole proposed, and I said yes.”
A look of bewilderment yanked Bucky’s features upward. Emotions flashed across his face at lightning speed. A scoff barked out of his throat.
“No. No, I’m not-” He was caught off guard. Struggling to cover his tracks. “I’m not mad. It’s not like that. I’m just-”
“What’s it like, then?” You stared at him, expectant.
“Oh, come on…” It was all too much. He couldn’t be in such close proximity to you anymore. Couldn’t have you almost pressed against his side.
He fled from his seat on the stairs and opted to stand in the grass. He paced for a beat or two, wearing down the fresh blades of greenery. And when he finally came to a stopping point, he couldn’t face you. Couldn’t look you in the eye. He just needed a moment. Needed some space. Needed to breathe air that didn’t wear your perfume. And when he cleared his mind- and his lungs- he turned to you.
“You know…” he let out a huff. “You know that things haven’t always been exactly platonic between us. You know that I’ve had- that I’m-” His metal fingers ran through his hair, “Anyway, I’m just… I’m trying to deal with this whole thing. I guess I’m not doing a good job.”
It wasn’t news to you. But it still struck you like lightning.
Things between you and Bucky always teetered on the edge of romance. Always walked a tightrope between friendship and love. And while you adored a good “will they, won’t they” type of relationship on tv, it didn’t have the same charm in real life. The Nick and Jess, Sam and Diane, Janine and Gregory dynamic brought you only pain. Confusion. Heartache. Unfortunately for you, there wasn’t a room full of talented writers scripting your every interaction with Bucky. The two of you didn’t have a well thought out, perfectly planned arc that placed you in a relationship by the end of your third season as friends. No, the two of you were left to your own devices, navigating the difficult terrain without help.
Part of you always believed that you and Bucky would end up together. Maybe it was the Ben and Leslie of it all. Or maybe it was your hopeless romantic side. But you truly thought things would work out for the two of you. The ring on your finger, however, said otherwise.
A wave of remorse washed over you. You rested your elbows on your knees and dropped your chin into your hands. “We just never got the timing right…”
Bucky furrowed his brow, “What do you mean?”
“Our feelings for each other were always out of sync,” you lamented. “They ebbed and flowed over the years- just with opposite timing. When you had feelings for me, I was dating someone. When I had feelings for you, you were in love with another woman. It was just…” you cursed fate and destiny and everything in between. “It was bad fucking timing.
A sharp edge rose in Bucky’s voice, “You think that’s what happened?”
You nodded, “Um… yeah. Yes.”
“You’re wrong.” He was steadfast. Resolute. He wanted to argue with you, wanted to prove you wrong.
“What do you mean?”
“My feelings never ebbed- whether I was dating someone or not, those feelings never went away,” he said. There was a desperation in his voice. A longing you hadn’t heard before. “And they still haven’t. They’ve never gone away or even faded a little bit. I know you had fleeting feelings for me at one time or another, but mine weren’t temporary.”
It was bullshit- it had to be. Right? His “feelings” for you never seemed so concrete, so permanent. They weren’t even feelings; if anything they were more like passing flirtations. Momentary affections that dissolved every time a beautiful woman walked by.
You let out a scoff, “Tell that to all of your girlfriends-”
“I only dated other people because I was losing my fucking mind.” His voice rose an octave or so and he cut his eyes toward the house, watching for a sign that someone had heard him. “Every time you started seeing someone new, it was like I couldn’t breathe. So, I needed something- someone- to be a distraction. And I know that’s a dick move. But-”
You weren’t proud of it, but you were familiar with Bucky’s coping mechanism. With his tactics for surviving every new boyfriend of yours. “I did the same thing.”
“What?” He didn’t believe you- not even for a second. Your engagement ring wouldn’t allow him to.
“Buck, I’ve had feelings for you since we became friends. It was pretty much immediate after meeting you. And they weren’t ‘fleeting’- or whatever you said.” The word actually offended you. “They’ve never ebbed.”
You caught a glimpse of your engagement ring in your periphery and instantly dropped your hand into your lap, hiding the ring from your view- and Bucky’s. “I only dated other people because I didn’t think anything could actually happenbetween us.”
Bucky’s chest tightened. He instantly mourned the lost time, the years he could’ve spent with your lips on his. Of course, the friendship you shared was never a waste. And he’d never trade the years you spent as confidantes. But he couldn’t stop himself from thinking about how different things could’ve been. How much mutual pain could’ve been avoided.
He took a step away from you, too confused and upset to be in your orbit. “And you never told me any of this?”
Your brow furrowed; your lips stretched into a thin, frustrated line. “You have got to be fucking kidding me.”
“What?”
With fury smoldering in your chest, you rose from your seat on the porch steps. Anger glistened behind your eyes and hurt coated your words. “I told you! I bared my fucking soul to you!”
The puzzle pieces came together for Bucky. He let his head tip back a bit and covered his face with his hands. He let out a deep groan that only added to your rage. He didn’t have to ask- he already knew what you were referencing. But the part of him that wanted a fight egged you on. “Oh my god, are you talking about that night at the bar?”
“Of course I am!” you spat. “I told you everything- I confessed everything! I told you I loved you and that I wanted to be with you. I told you I was in love with you. And you just brushed it off!”
Bucky grimaced, “I know...”
He wandered a bit farther, putting a few more paces between your body and his. He knew he was wrong. Knew he fucked up. Every time he thought about what you said at the bar, and the way he reacted, he grew nauseous.
“But I didn’t think it was real.” Another wave of desperation sent his voice booming through the yard, “I didn’t know you actually meant it! And I didn’t think I should hold you to something you said after six margaritas.”
He had a point. He had good reason not to believe a drunken confession. But you gave a fervent shake of your head; it wasn’t his actions that night that hurt you, it was everything that followed.
“But you didn’t even acknowledge it!” The words echoed down your street. You wondered if your neighbors had gathered around their windows, watching yours and Bucky’s drama unfold like a soap opera. “You could’ve asked me about it the next day or-”
The pain in your voice cut Bucky deep. His tone was softer now, his voice a little quieter. He knew he should’ve handled things differently. Knew you deserved better. “Well, you never brought it up either…”
“I tried to!” A rogue tear dripped down your cheek. You wiped it away in a hurry, hoping Bucky hadn’t seen it- though you knew he had. “But you told me ‘not to worry about it’ and then you walked away. And that was it.”
Bucky watched as a few more tears gathered in the corners of your eyes. He wanted to wipe them away with the sleeve of his shirt. To offer you a hug. But he couldn’t- he was certain you’d swat him away. Regret sat in his stomach, weighing him down like lead.
“Do you know how embarrassing that was for me? I told you how I felt, and you pretended like it never even happened,” your voice wavered ever so slightly. “And when I tried to talk to you about it, you waved me off. I was so humiliated- I didn’t want to say anything else.”
The weeks that followed your drunken- but true- confession were some of the most miserable times of your life. Bucky simply carried on like normal, inviting you over for movies and pizza and wine. And you didn’t have it in you to pull away. To put some distance between the two of you. To take the time you needed to lick your wounds. And if you were honest with yourself, you didn’t want to stray from his side. Didn’t want to retreat. Because being around him was better than being without him, even if the rejection left you broken and bruised.
“After that,” you shrugged, “I thought you didn’t want anything more than friendship with me.”
“But I-” Bucky shook his head; you were wrong- you were so wrong. He’d always wanted more, always wanted you. “I’ve always loved you…”
“How was I supposed to know that? I mean, your string of girlfriends says otherwise.” You thought back on the litany- on the catalogue- of beautiful women Bucky paraded around. “And I know I dated other people, too. But you had so many. And you were so- you gushed about those women. You flaunted them. You talked about them nonstop.”
Bucky knew it was true. He brought his girlfriends to every event, every team dinner, every casual hang. The one time, the one place he deemed too sacred for the presence of his rotating cast of lovers, however, was the one-on-one time you shared. He never dreamed of allowing them to tag along when it was just supposed to be the two of you- that was one line he’d never cross. He did spend a significant amount of time talking about them, though. He went on and on about his many, many forays into the dating world. And truth be told, you had trouble keeping track of all the names.
Because, while you’d had a few boyfriends here and there, Bucky dated enough women to field a soccer team. Or two.
But you weren’t mad at him for it. You didn’t hate him for seeking companionship. You just couldn’t believe that he had real, legitimate feelings for you while simultaneously telling you that he planned to propose to Isabella. Or Nadia. Or Violet.
“Honestly, you made it seem like you wanted to marry every one of them,” you told him. “The way you talked about them- it was like you were so in love. So, I didn’t think…” The whole situation was too messy. Too confusing. “I didn’t think it was possible for you to have real feelings for me. I thought you were a flirt. And a ladies’ man. And I thought you only showed me affection when you were bored between lovers.”
Bucky thought back on all the girlfriends. All the hook ups. All the times he left a one-night stand and ended up at your apartment after. He hated it- but you were right. He may have flirted with you; he may have showed you fleeting affection. And maybe he made a joke or two about growing old with you- but he never made a declarative statement. He never confessed his true and undying love for you. Never made the effort to take your friendship to the next level.
Only you’d been brave enough to do that. And he’d paid you dust.
“And I mean, you made it very clear that you didn’t want to talk about my feelings for you,” you said. A flood of familiar embarrassment rose around your ankles. You found yourself struggling to wade through it, just as you had after Bucky brushed you off. “So, I just… I found Cole. And I stayed with him- I stayed long enough that he asked me to marry him. And I knew you didn’t want me, so… I said yes.”
Bucky couldn’t imagine a reality in which he didn’t want you. “I’m so-” he slid a hand over his mouth. He let his head drop a bit.
The weight of your words- of the truth- almost forced him to his knees. He’d only ever known longing, wanting, yearning- for you. And he always told himself you didn’t see him that way. But knowing now that you’d felt the same, that your confession was real and true, didn’t assuage the hurt. He couldn’t believe that he brushed you off. That he didn’t take the time and summon the courage to ask you about what you said at the bar.
But he’d been too scared. Too scared he’d ruin your friendship. Too scared he’d make you uncomfortable. Too scared that your drunk words were just that- drunk words with no meaning.
As your point of view stood next to his, the puzzle pieces aligned. And the two of you finally got a look at the full picture. It was a picture of mutual love, mutual longing, mutual heartache. A picture of two best friends who couldn’t find it in them to have a serious- sober- conversation about their feelings for fear of ruining a good thing.
“I’m sorry,” Bucky finally said. “I didn’t know you were serious at the bar. I didn’t mean to hurt you- I never want to hurt you.” He swiped his sleeve across his face, mopping up a stray tear that threatened to run down his cheek. “And I really didn’t mean to push you into the arms of another man. I just... I didn’t know you meant it.”
A tired sigh deflated your chest, “I meant it.”
Bucky wasn’t sure what to say. Or how to handle the situation. He hated that things got so muddled. Hated that you felt so hurt. Hated that he hadn’t just been honest. The two of you were so close, so comfortable together, he never thought things could get this messed up. This disastrous. But he supposed it was par for the course. After the way his life had played out, why would he think that something as important as falling in love would be easy?
“So, it seems like we’re…” Bucky frowned, “terrible at this.”
“Yeah,” a dark laugh escaped your chest. “I guess we’re both stupid.”
Bucky nodded. If there’d been one- just one- honest conversation between the two of you, none of this would’ve happened. There’d be no Cole. No hurt feelings. No argument in the yard. All this time, you could’ve been sleeping next to Bucky each night. You could’ve shared a home with him. Kissed him good morning each time the sun rose. And the engagement ring- albeit a smaller one- resting on your finger would’ve been from Bucky.
But it was too late now, wasn’t it? There was too much pain, too much hurt. And you were very much so engaged. Hell, you and Bucky were standing in the front yard of the house you shared with your soon-to-be husband. But Bucky had to ask, didn’t he? He had to dig deeper, to find the truth.
And after he’d failed to acknowledge your truth last time, he wasn’t going to do it again.
Knots twisted around in his stomach. His lungs failed to expand all the way. But he needed to know. “Do you still-
“Yes.” You didn’t hesitate. Didn’t leave even a sliver of room for doubt. “I still love you.”
Bucky said nothing. He simply drank in the words. Replayed them in his mind. Relished in the sound of your voice- sober and steady- saying that you loved him. It was all he’d ever wanted.
But his silence pushed you to the precipice.
“So, um,” your hands shook. “What about you? Are you-”
Bucky almost laughed. “Oh, come on. Of course, I do- of course, I love you. What kind of question is that?” He shot you a wink.
There it was- his truth laid out before you. And to think, you’d dreaded this night for weeks. Dreaded celebrating your engagement to Cole. Dreaded answering questions about your impending wedding. And now, the love you’d hoped for, the love you’d always wanted, laid perfectly spelled out for you in the grass. Somehow, the party celebrating your engagement to another man provided the perfect venue for Bucky to bare his soul.
And while the two of you relished in the others’ words of love, uncertainty still filled the air. Bucky stood firm on his side of the lawn, and you yours. This wasn’t a perfectly scripted episode of sitcom, there weren’t people telling you what to say. What to do next. Your shared predicament was messy and awkward. And though you didn’t have a director telling you how to act, you knew your neighbors were entertained.
“So, what do we…” Bucky shoved his hands into his pockets. “What do we do now? You’re supposed to marry someone else. Your house is full of people celebrating your engagement. And-”
He didn’t get to finish his sentence.
You pursued him across the lawn, stalking toward him until your lips crushed his. Instantly, his hands found your waist and pulled you tighter. Your hands slid up his chest, over his shoulders, and buried themselves in his hair. The chill in the air fell away. The noise of the party evaporated. Nothing existed outside of this moment, this kiss. Bucky snaked his arms around your back, encircling you completely. He wasn’t going to let you slip away. Not again.
But an errant sound from inside the house made a grab for his attention. And suddenly, the stark reality of the situation hit him like a train.
He pulled away ever so slightly, only allowing a few millimeters between his lips and yours. His gaze landed on the packed house, “Someone might see us-”
“I don’t care.” You gave his hair a gentle tug and closed the gap between you. Now that you’d finally tasted his lips, you didn’t want to spend a moment without them. Ever.
And while Bucky wanted only this- only you- for the rest of his life, his anxiety needled at him as it always did. He did his best to swat his worries away and devote his focus to you and only you, but he couldn’t fight it. He had to tell you, had to clarify.
Again, he pulled away.
“But you know I can’t- I can’t give you the things he can give you. You know that right?” He searched your face for any hint of realization. Any flicker of regret. “I mean, the big diamond ring, and the fancy wedding, and the house. I don’t want you to be disappointed, I don’t want you to-”
And again, you cut him off. Your mouth melted against his, hell bent on consuming him right then and there.
“Buck, I don’t want any of that,” you finally said when you came up for air. “I want you. That’s it.”
And there it was- Bucky’s confirmation that you wanted him for him. That you didn’t care about his small, shabby apartment. Or his lack of funds. That you loved him for who he was, not what he could gift you.
“And honestly, all the fancy stuff isn’t really my vibe,” you shrugged. “I mean, I’m not really the type to play tennis at the country club. And I don’t use ‘summer’ as a verb.”
Bucky’s laughed boomed through the yard. It cut through the noise and chatter of the party and made you feel more at home than you ever did in this godforsaken house.
“So, do you want to make a run for it?” Bucky asked between long, deep kisses. “If we go now, I don’t think they’ll catch us.”
It was enticing. The thought of absconding with Bucky set you alight from the inside out. All you could think about was spending the night in his bed, wearing his clothes as pajamas, and then ditching them entirely for a night of passionate debauchery.
But there would be plenty of time for the two of you to make your escape- after you carried out the plan forming on the outskirts of your mind.
“I say, we run- but not quite yet,” you told him. “I think you give me a few minutes inside so I can snag a couple bottles of champagne and some of that fancy whiskey Cole’s dad brought by. And then we jump in the getaway car and run like hell. How does that sound?”
How could Bucky possibly say no to that? He watched with bated breath as you snuck back into the house and hoped to god that no one noticed your return.
And his prayers were answered. Everyone was so drunk, so distracted by the music and the lights, that they didn’t even glance in your direction.
A quick trip to your room allowed you the opportunity to rid yourself of Cole’s ring. Sure, it was beautiful. And sure, Cole was a nice guy. But you didn’t want it, didn’t want to be shackled to him for the rest of your life. You slid the ring from your finger and instantly felt the weight of the world fall from your shoulders. It was the most instantaneous relief you’d ever felt- aside from kissing Bucky for the first time. You tucked the ring safely into the drawer of your nightstand and told yourself you’d return it to Cole tomorrow.
Tonight, you had more pressing matters to attend to. You snaked down the hall to the kitchen, undetected by the raucous partygoers. And without drawing any attention to yourself, you snaked two bottles of champagne out of their ice bath and tucked a nice vintage whiskey under your arm. If you and Bucky were going to celebrate, you were going to do it in style.
With the alcohol safely cradled in your arms, you made a mad dash for the front door. But just as you turned the handle, the sensation of someone watching you gave you pause. Slowly, you turned around, fearing that you’d find Cole’s confused, heartbroken gaze staring back at you. Instead, it was Nat who’d caught you in the act.
She gave you a wicked smile and mouthed “I told you so” from across the room. And with a sweeping gesture, she urged you to “go, go, go!” She didn’t have to tell you twice. Quick as a flash, you escaped out the door and sprinted down the porch steps.
Bucky paced up and down the front walk, waiting for your return. Part of him feared that you might not return from your trip inside. Maybe you’d change your mind about the whole thing. Maybe you’d decide to stay with Cole. But the way you tore down the front steps and launched yourself into his arms quieted his anxieties.
He took your face in his hands and captured your lips with his. “You got the goods?”
Your laugh vibrated against Bucky’s lips, “I don’t know about you, but I think stolen champagne tastes better.”
"That's my girl."
Bucky snaked an arm around your back and ushered you across the yard, out the front gate, and across the street to his car. He stole the booze from your grasp and placed the bottles gently in the back seat. And once he ensured that the alcohol you worked so hard to pilfer would make it home safe, he turned his attention to you.
His hands slid over your hips and traced up your spine, sending goosebumps over your skin. His mouth met yours in a kiss full of love and desperation. Longing and need. This was what you’d always wanted. What you’d begged the universe for. What you’d cried and agonized over. And now it was yours- Bucky was yours.
He pulled away only a fraction of an inch, “You ready to go, baby?”
“Get me outta here, Buck.”
------------------------------------
@beefybuckrrito @shadytalementality @everything-burns-down @rainbow-unicorn-pony @mandersshow @breakablebarnes @psychoticmason @glxwingrxse @lonewolf471 @dreamerglassesgirl @the-gods-gloted-but-they-burned @purpleshallot @seitmai @itvy5601 @dailyreverie @navs-bhat @eviesaurusrex @themorningsunshine @evangeliameryll @buckys-metal-arm @broadwaybabe18 @the-kestrels-feather @avocadotoastwithegg @goldylions @lokisasgardianvampirequeen @vrittivsanghavi @idkitsem @avengetheunnatural @rassvetsky @hereforbuckyandsteve @barnesselo @juvellian @samanthacookieone @frombkjar @blackbirdsinatrenchcoat @anything-more-than-human
#she would’ve made such a lovely bride#what a shame she’s fucked in the head#james bucky barnes#bucky barnes#james buchanan bucky barnes#bucky#bucky barnes angst#bucky angst#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes one shot#bucky barnes oneshot#bucky barnes reader insert#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x reader angst#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x yn#bucky barnes x you#bucky fanfic#bucky fanfiction#bucky fic#bucky x female reader#bucky x reader#bucky x reader angst#bucky x y/n#bucky x you#fatws bucky#you won’t remember all my champagne problems
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Mama Munson made Eddie’s Halloween costumes from scratch every year. She said it was because it looked cooler, but as he got older, he realized it was because she used scraps and cheap fabrics to make them and that’s all they could afford.
But his costumes were always great. Every year was better than the last.
When he got too old for trick or treating, she used Halloween night to teach him how to sew.
“For that jacket you wanna wear so bad, baby.”
It took a lot of effort, and a little bit of help for the thicker patches, but he managed to finish it in a few weeks.
That year for Christmas, he made her and Wayne battle jackets with their favorite bands and singers.
It became the thing he gave to important people.
Shortly after Vecna, when he was stuck in bed for nearly a month healing, he had his mom run to the store in Indy and start grabbing patches. Wayne found denim jackets from the donation store, surprised anything was left at all with how much people needed right now.
Eddie made all the kids jackets, even Max, who would probably think it was stupid in the same way she thought Lucas holding her hand was stupid (not at all).
He made Robin one, with a hidden rainbow flag patch on the inside pocket.
Nancy got one, even Argyle and Jonathan got one.
Steve didn’t.
Eddie didn’t know how to make it a friendly gesture, how to not make it look like he was screaming from the rooftops that he’d fallen hard for the guy who almost single-handedly saved his life. He was certain that giving him the jacket he made would be the end of the daily visits, the joking around, the fun.
“Baby, you think he don’t know?”
Eddie’s mama was trying not to laugh when he unloaded on her while he stitched the last patch to the front.
“He visits you every day, sometimes for hours, sometimes has to be dragged out by nurses, and ya think he don’t know?”
As usual, she had a point.
So Eddie was brave, gave Steve the jacket the next day when he stopped by.
Steve was silent as he took in every patch and pin, even the section of glitter glue Erica had insisted he add. Eddie played with his bare fingers, wishing now more than ever that he had his rings back.
Finally, Steve looked up, watery smile pointed right at Eddie.
“I love it. And you.”
Mama Munson slapped the back of his head gently later while Steve slept in the chair by his bed.
“I told ya so!” Her whisper was enough to make Steve shift around, his grip on Eddie’s hand tightening momentarily. “May have lost a nipple, but got yourself a boyfriend. That’s the Munson way.”
“What the hell do you mean?”
“Oh, Wayne never told you about losing his nipple in ‘Nam? Flirted with the medic and blamed it on blood loss, but wouldn’t ya know? The medic was a little light in his loafers, too!”
Eddie rolled his eyes.
“Wayne didn’t lose a nipple. You’re makin’ shit up again.”
“I ain’t never lied to ya! You ask Wayne tomorrow. There’s a reason he don’t ever go shirtless at the lake.”
And sure enough, the next day, Wayne lifted his shirt and showed Eddie where he had nothing but a scar where his nipple should be.
“So what about the medic?”
“Oh! Grant.” Wayne smiled. “We still write to each other sometimes. He’s married, got a few kids.”
“Oh. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. We wouldn’t have worked anyway. He lives in Maine. Can’t imagine dealin’ with moose.”
Mama Munson just raised her brows from her chair and smirked.
When Steve came by after his shift, he was wearing his jacket and the biggest smile Eddie’s ever seen.
“Anything new?”
“Nothin’ really. Just found out I’ve got a lot more in common with Wayne than I thought.”
#still no name for her but oh well#she can just stay mama Munson#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#wayne munson#mama Munson#I’m begging someone to write something with all this#I ain’t got the TIME#or the ENERGY#I have little spurts of thoughts like this and then NOTHING
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Favoritism
Pairing: Line Cook!Azriel x Reader
Summary: Azriel always seems to be working. Well, not always. Sometimes he's on the phone outside the restaurant with a massive smile on his face.
Word count: 1.3k
Warnings: None
a/n: Another little piece for this AU!! I'm loving building it up and including all the characters. I'm also loving characterizing Azriel!!! I can't wait for it to get more juicy and to add some angst in the near future ;) Thanks for reading!!!
Main Masterlist ♡
~~
“Here again, Azriel?”
“I picked up Lucien’s shift,” Azriel explained, moving the pan side to side atop the flame.
Elain hummed, her hip against the counter. “You all have such weird names.”
Azriel rose a brow. “Your sister’s name is Nesta. And Feyre isn’t very common either.”
“Yes, well my sisters are included in my definition of ‘all’.”
Azriel hummed, pinching salt into the pan and flipping its contents. The heat from the stovetop warmed his fingers as he went, calling his attention to the tan lines along his knuckles—rings he constantly needed to remove for work, an action that had been even more prevalent in recent weeks.
Elain spoke up again. “I feel like I see you here every time I work.”
“You call out every other shift. Of course you’re going to see me on the off-chance you come in,” Azirel droned, but there was a hint of a smile on his face that had Elain scoffing out a laugh.
“Oh, ha ha,” Elain mocked. “But seriously, Az, you’re always in this kitchen. I know for a fact that Rhysand wouldn’t make his best friend work so much. What’s the deal?”
Azriel knocked his head to the side as he considered Elain’s question. He plated the meal he had been working on—the one that would send Elain and her barrage of questions away—and set it on the counter she occupied. He gave his hands a quick wash, flipping a hand towel over his shoulder and crossing his arms. The waitress had not moved from her spot.
“Money.”
Elain did not budge. “Money? You? I know you can afford that house of yours without all of these hours. Rhys pays you far too much.”
Azriel gave her a look as if to say that’s my explanation. Take it or leave it.
Elain was not taking that explanation, clearly. Azriel watched her roll her eyes and let out another scoff before swiping the plate from the counter.
“Always so stupidly secretive,” she huffed. “You are ridiculous.”
Elain missed the small laugh Azriel breathed out as she left in a flurry.
Azriel then noticed the small break in orders that was typical for this time of day and used the opening as an excuse for his break. He called out to the others in the kitchen and then made his way to the dining room with his phone loosely gripped in his hand.
A few taps on the screen and your voice came through.
“Hi, Az,” you greeted, a smile clear in your words.
“Hi, baby,” he smiled right back. The earring on his right ear clicked against the phone as he licked his lips and continued. “You not in class?”
“I tried to plan my schedule around your lunch rush. No class between the hours of two and four.”
Azriel felt his face heat a fraction. “Right. Forgot about that.”
You giggled. “So, how’s work? I didn’t expect you to go in this morning.”
“It’s fine. Work. I was just picking up a shift as a favor. But I’ll be off in time to get you for dinner.”
Azriel listened as something shuffled in the back of your call—bikers whizzing past you, he assumed. That damn campus always gave him a heart attack. You called out a small apology he was sure no one was listening to before speaking to him once more.
“You seem to owe a lot of favors, Az. Are you causing that much trouble over there?” you joked. A small pause. “Also, do you think we could eat in? I don’t really have the money for a restaurant right now. My financial aid is not aiding me in the ways it should.”
Azriel felt his heart clench at the humorless laugh you released. You lived on campus and relied on the school’s dining plan which did very little for you nutritionally and emotionally. He had offered—countless times—for you to live with him or let him buy you groceries or just straight-up give you money, but none of that made you comfortable.
So, Azriel found other ways to solve this problem.
Azriel hummed in feigned contemplation. “We could. But the boss gave me a gift card to that new place downtown. I figured we could use it to celebrate.”
“Oh yeah? And what are we celebrating?”
“You.”
“Me?” you asked with an incredulous laugh. “Why on earth would we be celebrating me? All I’ve done recently is complain and cry a few times.”
Azriel couldn’t remove the smile from his face. He slotted his wrist in the crook of his elbow as he leaned against the wall outside the restaurant. Damn you and all the ways you made him melt in public.
“You only cried twice this month. We should celebrate that record. Not to mention you were crying over chemistry which we established was an acceptable response to that class.”
You gasped and began rambling about your chemistry professor. Azriel briefly checked his watch and relished in the fact that he had twenty more minutes to listen to you speak. He happened to miss, however, the waitress who was listening in just around the corner.
Elain was furious.
First, Azriel had a girlfriend that she had no idea about. Which was ridiculous because Elain considered Azriel to be one of her closest friends. And second—and perhaps most appalling—Rhysand was handing out gift cards to the staff and she had not been a recipient of this graciousness.
Elain narrowed her eyes and glared and the stucco lining the building before she slammed her way through the restaurant and straight into Rhysand’s office. The man calmly glanced up from his computer upon her arrival, an amused brow raised at her apparent fury.
“Hello, Elain,” he greeted. Rhysand leaned back in his chair and interlaced his fingers at his stomach. “You seem in high spirits.”
“Where’s my gift card?” she demanded, closing the door behind her with a harsh click. “You’re giving out gift cards and I have yet to receive one.”
Rhysand blinked. “I haven’t given out any gift cards.”
“And now you’re lying—great.” Elain plopped down in the cushioned chair on the other side of Rhysand’s desk. “I just heard Azriel talking about a gift card to that insanely expensive place that just opened. Rita’s or something. And he was talking to his girlfriend—did you know he had a girlfriend?”
“I did—”
Elain hadn’t been looking for a response. “He said you gave it to him. If you’re playing favoritism I will call the Better Business Bureau. And I’ll tell Nesta. You know how she gets around you. Also, why does Azriel, like, live here? Aren’t there laws around overtime? None of his seems fair and—”
“Elain,” Rhysand calmly interrupted. “May I answer any one of your questions? Or, perhaps, speak?”
Elain bit the inside of her cheek and nodded in annoyance.
“Perfect.” Rhysand crossed his ankle over his knee. “I haven’t given out any gift cards. If I do, I promise you’ll be the first to know. It’s possible that Azriel used me as a way to take his girlfriend out to dinner—as he has done countless times. If you were to meet her, you’d see why that was a necessity. She’s very much like Feyre in that way. In that explanation is also the reason why Azriel is always here, working.”
Elain felt her vexation deflate, but some of it lingered. “And why are you so knowledgeable about this mysterious girlfriend?”
Rhysand only shrugged. “Azriel’s private. Protective. He knows all of you are a bunch of gossips.”
Elain scoffed for the countless time that afternoon, still pissed that there was no gift card to be had.
#azriel x reader#azriel x you#azriel x female!reader#azriel shadowsinger#azriel spymaster#azriel acotar#azriel au#modern au#azriel x y/n#azriel fanfic#line cook au
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Girls On Film
pairing: pornstar!Rafe x pornstar!Reader
Summary: Running away from home to become a pornstar was never in your books. Having to move in with some asshole wan't in it either. Surely living in a house with someone you dislike can't be hard. It's just work, that's all it is. Right?
Warining: 18+, smut, fingering, masturbation, oral (m receiving), teasing, (let me know if I missed any)
Wc: 4.3K
Say Hello To The Camera
The girls around you all seem so confident. All dressed in minimal clothing, caked in makeup, sultry smiles plastered on their faces. You feel out of place, not fully but it feels like you don’t belong there. You’re dressed in a skirt and crop top with minimal makeup, you look more natural. Everyone there seemed like they were made for this life and you were the only one who wasn’t. It was like all eyes were on you, which isn’t something new.
You grew up in a small town, everything you did was broadcasted for the whole town. You learned that at a young age after your dad left your mom for his mistress. It was all anyone could talk about. All the parents were talking about it and then all the kids at school talked about it. Your life was the laughing stock of the town.
From then on your mother made you have a certain image, keeping you on a tight leash. She needed you to be picture perfect so you wouldn’t bring shame to your family. You were never allowed to date, go to parties, or even have sleepovers. That just made everyone at school pick on you more because you were the perfect little girl. You hated being perfect.
Once you hit puberty boys started to notice you and you couldn’t even react. The first time you’ve ever been kissed was when you were playing truth or dare at a party you snuck out to in highschool. Being a horny teenager who’s scared to lose her virginity so as to not disobey her mother is pretty hard. It was also hard to sneak the fact that you eventually did at senior prom.
You remember having to face you mom late that night. All the questions still clear in your mind. Everything you’ve done was to make her happy, hiding who you were so she would approve of you. All the sneaking around and keeping a low profile is the only thing you really know. So being here is like a culture shock to what you grew up with.
So to say all of this is sort of overwhelming is an understatement.
The number you were given when you first walked in was called out. Reluctantly you get up and walk over to the person waiting for you. This is what you wanted, you left home to do something that intrigued you. Since you were sixteen you’ve been watching porn. It became a habit for you and slower you started exploring yourself to find out you really like sex. That’s why you moved out of your small town and moved to Charleston. It was the closest porn company to you.
Also a move that you could actually afford, California is too far away and you barely have money. This is what you wanted, so why are you so afraid? The room looks practically sterile. White walls and clean furniture carefully placed in the room. There’s three people sitting at a table watching as you walk in like hawks. Two guys and a girl, then a camera placed directly beside them. The little red light is on, signaling they were already recording.
“What’s your name?” One of the guys asks you. “Oh um.” You tell them your name. Their eyes scan down your body, watching your every move. You stand there perfectly still with a smile on your face. “You know you’re going to have to come up with a name if you get any further in this.” You take a deep breath. “I know.”
They all look at each other, the lady looks at you. “Can you take your clothes off for us sweetie? We want to see what you look like.” Nervously you strip from your clothes. You’re left in a tiny pair of panties that cover nothing. They write down on note pads, taking notes about your appearance. “Why don’t you touch yourself?”
Without a second thought you start to drag your hand slowly on your body. Fingertips skimming your skin to reach your nipples, pinching them between your fingers. For a couple of minutes you play with your breast, giving them a squeeze and pushing them together. Your nipples are hard from all the playing. One of the guy’s mouth drops when you slip your panties off and make your way over to the couch.
Sitting down you spread your legs, exposing yourself to the room. Your left hand spreads your pussy as the right toys with your clit. Moans slip from your lips as you continue to play with yourself, a finger dipping in. You open your eyes and smile at the camera, slipping another finger in. The two fingers scissor you open, curling to give you the best pleasure ever.
The three of them watch in awe as you finger yourself, bringing yourself to the very edge of an orgasm and stopping. Only to continue the cycle once again. By the time you actually cum both of the guys are close to cumming in their pants. The lady’s panties are soaked and she’s not even into girls that way. You were a star in the making.
“So when can you come in next?”
☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾
“No, I'm not doing it.” The voice on the other end sighs. “Rafe you can’t just ignore this. I’m telling you this girl is different.” Jared, his manager, tries to reason with him. “I’m not going to work with someone who doesn't know how to do anything. Find someone else to do it.” He’s honestly tired of them trying to get him to do castings. This has to be the fourth one he’s turned down.
It’s always the same thing, Jared calls him and it’s something below his pay grade. “Listen Rafe, you’re good but you need to do this. I don’t know how many times you can keep turning things down before they find another new pretty face. Trust me when I tell you, this girl is something else.” He knows he has to do it. There’s only so many times he can say no to them.
He’s been in the industry for a year and made them a lot of money but that doesn’t mean someone else couldn’t. “How much?” He’s walking around his kitchen opening cabinets to see what he can eat. “$2,000 just to do the screen test. Then you both get 20% of the profits made. Think about it after every $5,000 you would get $1,000. With her, trust me this will make you rich.”
Rafe thinks about it as he opens up a cereal box and takes a handful of it. “I’ll do it but I want 3,000 for just doing it. You know I don’t like working with newbies.” The guy on the other end laughs out loud, the vibrations ringing in his ear. “We’ll see if you still have that attitude after. The shoot is at three so you better get here for two. You should get to know her a little.”
He looks at the clock on the stove and sees that it's twelve already. “Yeah whatever I’ll be there.” Hanging up, he takes another handful of cereal and goes to get ready. He makes sure to wash with extra hot water to be squeaky clean, scrubbing down his body to be as clean as possible. Next he grooms himself by trimming his pubes, leaving them at a good length so they aren’t all over the place.
The whole time he keeps cursing himself for not having in his contract NO CASTINGS. It’s not that he has something against them, it's just he would rather not do them. They’re great to watch, especially when you can tell they are really new to everything. He would rather be on the watching end than the receiving end. The girls just seem to over do it when you’re the one they are with.
Rafe would rather be paired with someone who’s been in the industry long enough to be comfortable on camera, not shy and awkward. He’s frustrated the whole drive there, slamming the car door when he gets out. This is so stupid. He thinks, greeting everyone as he walks by. He walks into the green room where Jared and Liz are waiting for him, but when he enters it's just you.
You’re just sitting there going through different porn magazines. “Who are you?” His voice scares you. Looking up from the page you meet blue eyes, you tell him your name a bit distracted by him. He has to be one of the cutest guys you’ve ever seen. He’s tall, well built, god his buzz cut is to die for, plus his arms would be good for putting you in a headlock. Overall you would say he’s really fucking hot.
“Oh the new girl right?” A bit nervous about meeting your potential costar you squirm under his gaze. “Um yeah. Are you Rafe?” You’re picking at the skin around your fingers, a nervous habit you’ve gained over the years. Just further proof that Rafe doesn’t want to be here, you’re new. Not just to the industry but to all of it. He’s seen it before with other co-workers.
They get paired with the new girl and boy is she new. Never sucked a dick and sure as hell never been fucked. It’s not hard to spot those types of new girls, they dress differently from the ones who have lost their virginity. Their demeanor is different, you can just tell by looking at them. That’s what Rafe sees as he looks at you. Some little girl who doesn’t even know where pleasure begins or ends. You looked like the embodiment of virginity, pure like the coke he takes.
He’s going to eat you alive.
“Are you sure you should be here?” The look of confusion on your face is met with his closed off stare. “So you’re not Rafe?” His stare gets more intense. “I am. Are you going to answer my question?” You scoff at him. “Well considering they asked me back, yeah I would say I should be here? Should you? I feel like they have rules about being a dick.” You may have been the nice girl growing up but that's because you were forced to. You are tired of being her and everyone always looking down at you.
“That’s a smart mouth you got there. Hope you know how to use it.” Rafe’s steps echo as he walks to the couch you are sitting on. “Well I hope your dick is not as small as you make it out to be. Would feel bad for the girls you work with.” It’s surprising how quick you are with your comebacks. It’s like you don’t even think before talking back to him.
As he watches you, he sees your leg bouncing just another sign of why you shouldn’t be here. He may like the way you talk back but this isn’t a place for a girl like you. Just as he was about to make a snide remark the door bursts open. Liz walks in first then Jared and finally Micky. “Alright sweetie, figure out a name for us yet?”
All eyes are on you waiting for your response. “Maisy Day.” Rafe wants to laugh at the name, Maisy out of all things? “Sweet and innocent. Great job.” But Micky has a point, it sounds flowery if that even makes sense. It’s like he would find you out in the middle of a field, all innocent waiting for him to ravage you. On second thought maybe he can get used to the idea of this.
“It’s a simple blowjob seen okay. Rafe you will be recording everything on this camera.” Jared places the camera on the table in front of them. “He’s going to be recording you and just try to go with the flow on this one. We want to see how you are behind the camera a bit more and then you’ll get a script.” You shouldn’t be nervous, you’ve seen plenty of these videos, even practiced with the dildo you had.
Now that it’s getting closer to being real it’s scary. “Alright let’s get started.” Like second nature, Rafe picks up the camera and points it at you. The red light turns on after he presses the record button. He’s leaning the lens down, getting you sitting on the couch in the frame. You look so pretty sitting there for him, even prettier when you slide down to your knees.
“Smile at the camera baby. Tell them your names.” Sitting back on your knees looking up at the camera in Rafe’s hand with a smile. “Hi my name’s Maisy and I’m your new wet dream.” You seal it with a kiss and wink towards the lens. The camera picks up your hands as they unbuckle his belt and pull his pants down. Rafe can’t help but get excited when he sees how much you’re ready to suck him off.
He doesn’t get why he was so upset about having to do this screen test in the first place. Seeing you on your knees for him was enough compensation. He tries to calm the excitement because he still has a chance of being right. You seem good so far but that can only last for so long. “Oh fuck.”
The words slip out before his brain can even catch up. Your tongue licks up from the base to his tip, swirling it around before giving it a kiss. “You like that?” The way you tilt your head slightly is making your head spin. Then your lips wrap around him and give him a nice suction. Whatever can’t fit in your mouth is occupied by your hand. Rafe’s other hand grips a fist full of your hair, helping to guide your movements.
“Just like that baby. Such a good girl aren’t you?” The moan you let out is muffled by him, the vibrations adding to his pleasure. He’s getting so lost in the moment looking at you from the lens and in person. So lost that he didn’t realize he was thrusting into your mouth or that your hand slipped under your skirt.
Only when you let out a particularly loud moan did he finally realize what you were doing. “Are you rubbing your pussy right now?” Your closed eyes open wide from being caught. “I thought you were a good girl, just a slut in disguise aren’t you? Bet you touch yourself every night to the thought of someone fucking you good.” Your eyes close on instinct as your fingers increase their speed.
You’re matching your strokes to his thrust, trying to feel what he felt. He maybe an asshole but he’s a hot one. You honestly wouldn’t mind fucking him. Rafe looks over his shoulder to see the three of them just watching what is unfolding. The clock right behind them shows that only two minutes had passed and he was ready to blow his load.
Not wanting to be embarrassed of cumming too early he pulls your hair back as his hips retreat from your face. He rubs his dick over your face as you give it open mouthed kisses when you could. “Lay back on the couch.” Your tilting your head again but this time in confusion. “Come on baby. Don’t make me punish you.”
Following his instructions you get up and lay down on your back. He joins you on the couch sitting on his knees between your legs. Lifting your skirt up, he focuses the camera on your pussy, using his fingers to spread you out for everyone to see. “Such a pretty pussy.” He brings the lens back up, positioning it so it catches his tip playing with you.
You squirm under him as he rocks his hips back and forth. The girth on him spreads your lips with each stroke perfectly hitting your clit. He continues like this for a few more minutes, teasing you every step of the way. Giving you a few strokes and almost putting the tip in and backing out. Just when you think he’s going to go past the tip, bury himself deep within you, he just psychs out.
It was driving you all mad. “Please.” The voyeurs in the room don’t know what to do. They told Rafe just a simple blowjob, but this. This doesn’t really feel like they should be here, which is new to them. “Awww the poor baby, can’t take a little teasing.” You whine more at his words. “Shhh it’s okay. You can handle it.” The only sensation you get is from him sliding between your lips.
He’s trying not to touch anymore of you, afraid that you’ll be burned into his skin forever. You’ve taken him by surprise and he doesn’t like when someone else has control. To him this is his way of overpowering you. He wants to be ingrained in your brain before you run off to fuck someone else. Let’s face it, Jared was right, there is something about you.
Bringing his right hand down, he places his thumb right under his tip adding pressure to his strokes. With only a few more strokes your mouth drops open, letting out the most pornographic moan he’s ever heard. He couldn’t stop himself from cumming if he wanted to, his hips still moving to milk himself.
He leans back a tiny bit more to catch all of the mess he made of you. Your pussy is covered in his cum, coating you in white film. He spreads it around a little more, marking his territory. “Look at what a mess you are. Tsk. What am I going to do with you?” Eyes track your hand that moves down your body and how the fingers gather some of his cum. His eyes flicker up to yours as you give the camera an angelic smile.
Blue eyes are trained on your movements, seeing what you’ll do next. What he didn’t expect was for you to wrap your lips around those fingers and hum at the taste. Once the fingers leave your mouth you have him letting out a moan himself. “I’m sorry. I can still be your good girl right?” His moan is involuntary, slipping out before he can fully process your words.
Gathering his cum himself he brings it back to your lips, watching as your tongue licks it up before your lips wrap around his fingers. “Yeah baby you can be my good girl.” As if the fog that clogged his brain cleared his head he realized what happened. He went completely off target and he doesn’t really care.
Carefully he moves around and turns off the camera, getting up to find something to clean you with. The gentleness is a stark contrast to how he acted with you earlier. Not that you are complaining, it’s nice to think he cares even though he doesn’t know you. Flipping your skirt back down you get up and look at Liz. Her eyes are somewhat wide, looking between the two of you.
“That.” The voice was squeaky, Micky clears his throat to fix it. “That was wow. Umm great job guys. I’ll take the camera and the two of you are all set.” The three of them leave and it’s just the two of you once again. “Still think I shouldn’t be here?” Rafe’s turns to you at the sound of your voice. “Never said I didn’t.”
You hum at him as you grab your bag. “Didn’t need to. Your question and body language said it all.” Maybe he was actually wrong about you, maybe that good girl act is just an act. He watches as you walk out of the room, blowing him a kiss over your shoulder.
That night when he’s trying to go to bed all he can think about was you. The way you looked, smelt, smiled, fuck the way your mouth felt around him. Every painful image flickered through his head like an old film. You were just plastered on the big screen, his very own porno right before his eyes once again. Before he knows it, his hand makes it’s way into his loose sleep pants. He’s hard as a rock just by thinking back to earlier. His orgasm was embarrassingly quick, a new world record honestly.
It didn’t get any better in his sleep. Every dream was about taking you in different positions and shutting your smart mouth up. When he woke up in the morning he was was painfully hard, precum seeping from the tip. He had to get himself off twice just to feel normal again. It still didn’t stop you from infiltrating his mind, plaguing all of his thoughts.
By the time it hit afternoon, he was ready to drive right into a wall to stop the thoughts. Not once has anyone made him such a mess. He’s literally slept with hundreds of girl, what makes you different? He’s seen them all, the really good girls to brats that need to be tammed, yet you are the one who does him in.
He’s honestly thankful that it was just that you two didn’t actually have to sleep together. The thought of that alone is enough to want to make him quit, he would never be the same again after that. But that’s not who he is, he’s Rafe Cameron. Girls are the one’s wo fawn over him and get obsessed not the other way around.
It has been five days since the shoot. He wonders if you are thinking about it as much as he is. If you touch yourself at the thought of him like he’s been doing. It’s a shock he even cares if you are or not. It shouldn’t even matter to him. In the middle of his pity party, his phone vibrates on the couch cushion next to him. He sighs when he sees it’s Jared. Great another casting. “Hello?”
“Dude you need to get down here as fast as you can.” Jared’s voice isn’t one of anger but more of excitement. “Why?” Rafe feels like this is a trick to get him to go do another casting. He doesn’t have any shoots lined up for a bit since he decided to take a little vacation. They were lucky he even went in last time. “Do you always have to argue with me? Just get down here.”
Reluctantly he gets up and fishes his keys off the hook by the door. The whole ride many scenarios are playing out. One is of him going in and finding out it actually was another casting. Two you reported him for not following the “script” they gave you. Three they decided he isn’t worth dealing with anymore. Every scenario seems worse then the last.
Walking into Jared’s office he’s greeted with the sight of Liz and you. His eyes widen when he sees you look over your shoulder at him. There’s a little smirk that is rubbing him in the wrong way. Ironic considering you seemed good at it the other day. “What’s all of this?” He takes a sear on the chair next to you.
“The two of you are a hit. I mean the number are crazy and it just released.” Did he just hear what he thinks he did? Next to him you are internally freaking out. Just how many people actually saw it? “What?” You both say in unison. Liz sits down on the edge of the desk closer to you. “Sweetie we have a deal for you. We want to sign you on and start you on your first project.”
You sit up and lean closer to her. “Wait really?” The excitement in your voice is noticeable from a mile away. Rafe stares in confusion. “What does this have to do with me?” Liz and Jared give each other a look. “Well we also have an offer for you.” Jared starts off. “For fucks sake. We want the two of you on this project together. Everyone loved seeingf the of you and it would be a lot of money.”
“No way.” The words fly out faster than he means it. Your shoot him a death glare. Who does he think he is? “I agree I don’t want to work with some dick.” He slowly turns his head to look at you. “At least I belong here. You probably wouldn’t even last long.” He doesn’t like the smile you are giving him right now. “You would know all about that wouldn’t you? I got you off pretty quick last time and you didn’t even fuck me.”
The clench of his jaw wasn’t hard to miss. It’s honestly such a shame his personality is awful. The man is attractive but the personality makes it hard to like him. After you got home from the shoot you went straight to the companies website and searched him up. Thousands of videos popped up and each one was screaming for you to watch. You aren’t ashamed to admit that you got off to them a couple of times.
But you are ashamed that you actually want to fuck him. You blame his looks, he’s too hot. This is like all of your fantasies coming to life. “Rafe can you stop being a dick for once. This is going to be huge, think of the money.” He actually stops to think about it, if they are right then he can’t pass it up. “Fine.”
All eyes are on you know, waiting for you to cave in. IF you’re beig honest you only said no because he turned it down automatically. It stung that he didn’t want to work with you. “Okay.” The two managers relax knowing that you both agreed. They whip out the contracts and hand them to you along with a pen. RIght before you could sign Liz says one last thing. “Oh yeah, you also have to live together for this. Now you can sign.”
“WHAT?”
#rafe cameron#rafe x reader#rafe obx#obx#rafe x you#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe smut#drew starkey smut#outer banks smut
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Second Best- Jungkook (part 6)
Summary: Being friends with someone who has your heart it’s already hard, let alone when that special someone ends up falling in love with your best friend, the one you think would never make anything to hurt you . Will you be able to ignore it and move on? what will happen when everything gets too much for you to handle?
Genre: Friends to lovers; angst; body insecurities; bullying; friend betrayel;
Pairing: Jungkook x female!reader
Jungkook woke up around 9:30 am. The first thing he did was check his phone in case he had any notifications from Y/n, but had none. He was seriously getting worried about this lack of response. Had something happened with the person Y/n left with? If that was the case he would never be able to forgive himself. He knew he should have gone after her, he's so stupid.
He got up, took a quick shower, got dressed, grabbed his keys and left, he couldn’t keep up with this uneasy feeling. Putting his helmet on, he drove to the coffee shop Y/n worked. He knew her shifts very well, and that was the only place he could find her. When he got there, he parked his bike, took a deep breath and got in looking everywhere for her but still no Y/n in sight.
“Hey there moto boy. What can I get you?” Sana asked. Jungkook looked kinda confused. “I was actually looking for Y/n. Is she on her break?” Sana frowned and looked at him suspiciously.
“You’re kidding right?” Sana exclamed. “You are always together and talk to each otherall the time when you aren’t. You can’t tell me you didn’t know she took some days off”
The world fell at Jungkook's feet upon hearing that. Y/n took a few days off and didn't even answered to his texts or deign to call? what the fuck was going on. Jungkook nodded his head, said thank you and left, picking his phone up instantly to call Y/n. “The person you called is not available. Please try again later”
Fuck. Me
------------
Y/n fell in love with that place as soon as she saw it. Everywhere she looked she she felt immense peace and everything seemed so quiet and cozy, everything to make the weight on her shoulders disappear. Upon entering the chalet, they were immediately greeted by a gentleman at the entrance who directed them to the reception.
After checking in and receive the keys, they picked up their luggage and followed the gentlemanto the elevator, who was showing them the way to their "apartment”. Y/n couldn’t believe what her eyes were seeing. Walking in, she’s faced with a very nice living room, with wooden walls and gray furniture. It had shelves with books, among other really cute stuff decorating the place. All very neutral and very light, exactly what she needed. On the coffee table was champagne and a plate with strawberries and chocolate with a small note saying "we hope you enjoy your stay as much as we enjoy your presence. Thanks for choosing us. Have fun"
From the living room they went to the bedroom to organize their things. When they walked in Y/n was even more astonished. From their bed they had a view of the outside. She always loved snow and being there was filling her heart with so much happiness she wished she could live there forever.
“Where did you find this place and how can you afford it for both of us?!” Y/n exclaimed. Lisa looked at her with a funny look “My dad owns it. A benefit of traveling so much and not seeing his family for so long, not everything can be bad. I used to come here for Christmast and New year. It's crazy during those days and you know me, I love crazy and those were my favourite moments here”
Y/n laughed. Only Lisa could say something like that.
“So… You know how to ski right?” Lisa asked out of nowhere. “Oh hell no Lisa, no way, not right now, we just got here we should—” Y/n argued back but was soon interrupted by Lisa
“There's a snow suit in the closet on the right. We have a lot to discover we won't wait until tomorrow. You rest during the night. Come on princess, time is money” Y/n huffed while getting her suit to start putting it on. How could Lisa have so much energy was something she couldn't understand.
They both got dressed and head out of the chalet. Y/n was amazed by the view, everything was perfect. But it’s not an adventure if something doesn't go right for Y/n. Out of nowhere she lost sight of Lisa, making her panick. She had no idea where she was.
Y/n looked around trying to see her friend but couldn’t identify anyone who would look like her. She started walking around worried about straying too far from where Lisa last saw her. Y/n was so distracted that she didn't even notice anyone coming close to her, ending up colliding with that person, causing her to lose balance and fall. The other person quickly knelt down, stretching out his hand to help her until she heard “Y/n?”
She looked up, took the stranger's hand and straightened her hair a little, trying to understand where she recognized that voice from, until the stranger took the protective mask off his eyes and saw him.
“Taehyung?”
Tags: @esposadomd @joonlover1207 @eegyo @furrywonderlandwolf @minghaosimp @differentrunawayperson @nikkinikj @jksusawife @11thenightwemet11 @jk97bam @11thenightwemet11 @cryingoverpixelsetc @bhonbhon @lostinneocity @almostpurplelady @meowforluv
#jungkook#angst#bts#jungkook imagines#imagines#jungkook angst#jungkook x reader#bts imagines#jungkook x you#fluff#jungkook imagine#kpop angst#bts x reader
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Perfectly Misaligned
Vi x reader
Summary: Vi has always been protective over you ever since you moved in next door to a less than savory part of town. Nevertheless though she still tries to play things cool though and not cross any boundaries. Whenever she hears the way your friend really talks to you though from the other side of the door, all bets are off.
Contains: very very au! still kind of new to the arcane/LoL universe so this will not be following canon or anything at all (obvs because it’s fanfic but still), sweet and soft vi, protective vi, depictions and discussions of abuse (physical and emotional), injuries, hurt x comfort trope, fluff fluff and more fluff!! <3
basically a vi version of my first jb one-shot but I still included some differences! once again my first time writing for her so please be gentle! i hope you like it 🥹🩵
(PSA: i’m writing this from experience! if you are in an abusive situation like this please take care of yourself 💙)
“Jesus, have you ever managed to recall a single thing right?!” My best friend seethed, someone who should’ve been my best friend at least as she slung an already chipped dirty plate across the dingy kitchen.
I should’ve kicked her out at the first sign of violence. I shouldn’t have even invited her over to think of it. Somewhere in my stupid brain I thought that talking about it in person would help us work things out more. Maybe because in some way I thought she was more biting over text messages so it wouldn’t hurt as much in person either. Every moment of rationalization got stupider by the second.
“That never happened! I never said any of that! You’re doing just what you always do! Pointing the finger and making me out to be the villian! You really think you’re the innocent one in all of this?!” I yelped as soon as she slammed her hand down on the emotional support water bottle I was currently clutching onto until it hit the floor with a loud thunk.
The sound of a knock on the door made me flinch again, the tears burning my eyes until they started to ache. “Hey, y/n? It’s getting kind of loud over there, are you okay?” The voice followed from the other side of the door. Violet, probably the best neighbor I could’ve asked for in one of the trashiest apartments. It was definitely a rough part of town we lived in, the only thing we could afford really. She always checked in on me though.
I hated how pathetic I felt hugging myself, eyes wide as I peered up at my ‘friend’ as if I was fucking asking for permission. Permission she clearly wasn’t giving me. “Didn’t know you two were so close. Is this someone else you’re hiding me from? Someone else you’re probably painting the worst picture of me to?”
“Y/n, I’m coming in.” Vi echoed, fuck I had almost forgotten I’d given her a spare key for whenever she needed it or just wanted company.
The moment the door swung open though I could feel the weight of my ‘friend’s push shoving me towards the ground. The sting of broken glass biting in my skin as I yelped in pain, bits of blood now streaking across the ground. And Vi had seen every second of it.
“Did you just put your fucking hands on her?” She practically growled as she made her way into the apartment, thick combat boots kicking aside broken glass to make a path.
“Oh c’mon, do I really look like I would hurt somebody? She clearly fell-”
“Yeah, you do. Because that’s all I’ve been hearing you do since the moment I came home and thank god I got here whenever I did-”
“Vi, please don’t-” I squeaked out with yet another wince of pain as I tried to push myself up to a sitting position. I knew how she was. The way she stayed bandaged up and covered in bruises didn’t hide exactly how she made her money. But I had never wanted to see that side of her myself. I didn’t think I could.
The words were lost to me though, lifting my hand as if to latch onto her own only to see a piece of glass protruding from the muscle below my thumb. Vi only took one wide look down at me before shooting a sea of daggers towards the culprit’s way. “I’ll give you a headstart before I break every last finger that you laid on her? How about that?”
“Vi-” I tried to protest again, but I should’ve known better than to believe she’d actually try and stand up to someone like Vi. Towering over both of us with a plethora of tattoos in black ink and enough muscles to put a bodybuilder to shame, she’d be intimidating to anybody. If it wasn’t for the fact that she had stumbled out of her apartment the day I moved in with a hopeful grin on her face as she offered to help me carry things upstairs I probably would’ve been intimidated by her too. But she had charmed me from day one.
“Damn it, doll, what’d she do to you?” She whispered, kneeling amongst the glass without a single care of it scraping her up too. “Is it safe to pull that out?” She wondered, bandaged and bruised fingers gently taking my wrist into her hand to examine the damage on my palm.
“I think so… it isn’t too deep.” I spoke, sucking in another yelp of pain as I yanked the glass from my hand and shakily tossed the now red piece aside. “It’s not that bad- she- she just pushed me.”
“No, y/n-” It was the first time she directed that glare towards me and I’d be lying if I said it didn’t make me wince at first. Only seconds later though I watched her icy expression soften with a shake of her head. “You can’t excuse it this time, doll.”
I didn’t say anything, even knowing she was right, she stared down at my scraped and cut knees while the tears dripped down my cheeks until they landed on the open wounds and made them sting. Knowing I would probably find some way, some reason to excuse what had just happened. I always did.
“C’mon, baby, let’s go over to my place and get you patched up.” She sighed, almost with a hint of disappointment before sliding an arm around my shoulders and another underneath my knees. I sucked in a breath of pain as I was separated from the pool of glass, microcuts now hitting the air as the pieces that had embedded themselves into my skin clinked to the floor.
My eyes felt heavy, my head already lolling to the side the moment I felt her sweeping me up with ease. My head ached from the amount of arguing, almost worse than the stings of the open wounds. Vi shoved open the door to her apartment next door, still the same chaotic mess it usually was whenever she invited me over. She never showed it, but sometimes I think she felt lonely. She was just the kind of person you could tell even by first glance that she had been through a lot. I never asked though. It never seemed appropriate to get too personal. She was a private person, and I respected that. Or tried to.
“This might sting a little.” She whispered once we made it to her tiny bathroom, leaving me propped up on the sink as she rummaged around for her first aid supplies. I tried to mask my expression of pain the moment she touched the antiseptic to my bloodied knees but ultimately failed as a whimper tumbled from my lips.
“I’m sorry.” I spoke through a sharp breath, “That y-you have to do this. I shouldn’t have gotten you involved in our shit.” I lifted a shaky hand to try and wipe at my eyes, tears that seemed to have miraculously remained at bay until now.
“No, y/n, I got involved on my accord. Because it seemed like somebody needed to.” She shook her head, and I never knew that hands that looked so rough could be as gentle as hers were. Pulling them away from the wounds only to hold my chin in between her thumb and pointer finger. “Has she ever put her hands on you before, doll?”
I shook my head almost immediately, watching her expression harden, eyes icy enough to freeze. “Are you lying?” She asked again, a quiver setting into my bottom lip as she seemed to see through it all. Her anger was unmistakable, the way she pulled her hands away from me only to clench them into fists. Shoulders set like she was about to swing at something, anything. And still somehow I wasn’t afraid of her.
“Vi, Vi please… please don’t go after her right now. Please just- just stay with me. For a little bit, please.” I reached out to slide my hand around her bulging bicep just before she could put her fist through the wall.
I felt her swing around to face me, an arm sliding around my shoulder, fingers knotting through my hair as she held me to her broad shoulder. “You’re more important.” She finally spoke with another long breath that felt like she was loosening every muscle in her body. “She’ll get what’s coming to her though.”
“Promise you’ll be careful.” I begged into the fabric of her tank top.
“I can’t ever promise that, but I’ll always do my best.” The feeling of her fingers running through my hair was almost enough to pull the tears from my eyes again. Gentle touches I wasn’t familiar with. Gentle words I wasn’t used to hearing I almost couldn’t believe them. The feeling of safe muscular arms holding me to her warm chest as I clung onto her like I hadn’t ever done before. I didn’t even realize I was crying until I heard her softly shushing me from above, her chin propping up on top of my head. “Shhh, I’ve got you now. I’ve got you. Nobody’s gonna hurt you.”
She was careful whenever she inched away, gently drawing my body from hers. Calloused hands drawing down my bare arms as if checking for anymore tiny cuts the glass might have left. “Let me finish patching you up, and then I’ll hold you as long as you want me to.”
She wrapped my knees and hand in her bandages and placed little bandaids on every small wound. Whenever we made it back to my place though she didn’t hesitate to sweep up every last bit of the broken glass too before finally letting herself sit down.
“You didn’t have to clean everything, you know? I could’ve taken care of it.” I spoke into my lap, face drawn down as if in shame.
“I think you’ve cleaned up someone’s mess a few too many times.” Vi sighed before stretching an open arm out as if beckoning me in. “C’mere doll.” I was already moving into her arms, taking in her musky scent with just a tinge of iron that she always had whenever she returned from work. “I’m sorry I didn’t wash up first, I just heard the yelling and I came running and-”
“It’s okay.” I said with a shake of my head just before nuzzling into her chest. Her body could’ve swallowed me whole if she wanted it to, I felt like nothing more than a ragdoll curled up into her arms. And I normally would’ve hated it. But with Vi I felt like I could finally be small and sensitive and fragile and I’d be safe. It was just a matter of not having to be on guard 24/7.
Vi cleared her throat from above me, her fingers brushed underneath my chin as if nudging me to look at her. Blue eyes that I felt like were gonna send me into cardiac arrest, and with my hand bundled up into a ball against her chest I swore I could’ve felt her own heart kicking into gear. “Y/n, you know I really care about you, right?”
“After tonight, yeah, I- I think I do.” My cheeks felt like they were on fire, and all I wanted was to hide my face into her shirt again. But with the grip she had on my chin I knew she wouldn’t let me. “I- I care about you a lot too.”
“I know you do, I just feel like a lot of people don’t return the favor, you know? So I just… I want you to know that. I’ve got you. Regardless.” A long breath was shuddered from my lungs at her warm words. Feeling her cracked but soft lips drifting downwards to brush against my forehead just before she finally released my chin.
It felt like they held a lot of weight to them. Almost more than what they let on, than she wanted to let on. At least for now. They were enough though. Enough to get my eyes to tear up pathetically again as I burrowed my face back into her chest with a small sniffle.
“You’re my best friend, Vi.” I muttered just loud enough for her to hear.
She delicately slid her fingers around my wrist, softly stroking my pulse point until my teary eyes fluttered shut, “You’re mine too, darling.”
#Spotify#fanfic#vi x reader#vi x oc#vi x y/n#vi fluff#vi x you#vi from arcane#vi arcane#vi fanfic#arcane league of lesbians#arcane#arcane league of legends#arcane fanfic#fanfiction#hurt/comfort#lesbian#lesbianism
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Living After Midnight (Failed Rockstar!Eddie x Motel Worker!Reader)
♫ Summary: Eddie lowered his guard during a late night conversation, revealing crucial details about his past. But was it enough for you to reciprocate? (4.3k words)
♫ CW: slowburn, strangers-to-lovers, angst, drug use, parental conflict, poverty, homelessness, brief mention of neglect, brief mention of sex work, eventual smut (18+ only, minors DNI)
♫ Divider credit to @hellfire--cult
chapter four: show me yours, i'll show you mine
If convincing Eddie to take the job wasn’t enough of a struggle, you still had to explain the situation to your parents.
Hi Mom and Dad, I invited a guest to help fix up the motel. The same one who stole a blanket–but don’t worry, I got it back. Oh, and he’ll be staying here for free.
They were understandably taken aback by your decision, especially without consulting them first, but you’d mustered up a strong argument: Eddie was young, he was easy to get along with, and he showed a basic sense of personal responsibility. Not to mention that the place could certainly use the repairs; peeling wallpaper was just the tip of the iceberg. Lightbulbs needed to be replaced, carpets needed to be scrubbed, and the outside of the building desperately needed to be power washed.
“Plus, summer break doesn’t start for another few weeks,” you hastily added. “We won’t need to worry about renting out Eddie’s room until then.”
Mom arched an eyebrow at the newfound ascription—not room four, but Eddie’s room—but said nothing, only looking at your father for his seal of approval.
He breathed out, long and low, trying to do the calculations in his head. Your heart flip-flopped when his gaze dropped to the ground, his signature move when he was about to tell you no.
“If he doesn’t help out, he can’t afford to stay here anyway. It’s not like we’re losing money if he keeps the room for a bit.” You winced at the slight whine in your voice, the opposite of the infallible exterior you’d wanted to present.
Dad laughed, not unkindly, but belittlement panged in your chest nonetheless. “Except for the water, air conditioning, and electricity he uses,” he pointed out, ticking off each item on his fingers. “Unless he plans to only sit in the dark, sweat, and never shower.” He sighed as unmistakable disappointment weaved into your eyes and filled them with tears.
Now you’d have to tell Eddie that the offer was off the table, that he was shit out of luck, that you’d let him down. You never should’ve opened your big mouth in the first place. Captain Save-the-World, except you only ever made things worse. If you wore a cape, it would get snagged on tree branches each time you tried to fly.
“You have a good heart,” Mom spoke up, trying to nurse your wounded feelings, “but kindness doesn’t pay the bills.” She glanced at Dad again, her mouth set in a straight line. “Maybe we can discuss this further.”
You fought to ignore the hope that bloomed from her words, but the corners of your mouth turned upwards before you could rein it in. “Thank you,” you murmured, offering them both a grateful smile.
People called you a ‘bleeding heart,’ teasing you about your constant attempts to solve problems beyond a reasonable scope. At last year’s Thanksgiving dinner, your uncle had informed you—unprompted—that he would never vote for you for President because “you’d just give all my money to the poor.”
While your parents were more realistic with their goals than you were, they did their best to encourage your compassionate spirit; there was no doubt that you got your sense of morality from them. After deliberating on Eddie’s fate for a few hours, they had finally relented—with one stipulation.
“Your mother and I are not going to supervise him, so he’ll have to work night shifts with you,” Dad had said sternly.
“Really?” You clapped your hands in celebration. “Thank you! I mean, um, Eddie thanks you.”
Dad gave your shoulders a quick squeeze; it was his version of you’re welcome. “Yeah, well.” He played it cool, keeping his tone breezy. “It’ll be good practice for when you take over the place.”
You’d nodded in response, your insides twisting in a clashing mix of excitement and shame. Eddie wouldn’t have to live on the street, but it required you to continue lying to your parents.
I’ll tell them the truth once Eddie finds a real job and gets his own place. I can only handle one crisis at a time.
That was how you’d found yourself spending your Tuesday evening with Eddie Munson. The motel was otherwise empty, save for your parents, a middle-aged trucker in room 7, and Phyllis in her usual digs.
You and Dad had spent the end of his shift covering the floor with giant flimsy drop cloths. They hadn’t been used in years, evidenced by the thin layer of dust that coated them when you’d dug them out from the back of the supply closet. You’d tried your best to shake it all off but instead sent yourself into a sneezing fit.
Eddie sauntered into the lobby at a quarter after ten. Gray sweatpants sagged at his waist, the drawstring noticeably missing from the elastic band, and his white cotton undershirt had a tan stain that spread across his left pec.
“Coffee,” he explained with a shrug, rolling a hair tie off of his wrist and pulling his curls into a messy bun at the nape of his neck. He looked at you blankly and waited for you to instruct him, but you had already dove into your schoolwork. “Um, is there a ladder? Tools?” He pursed his lips and scanned the room with indifference.
“Oh! Right, yeah.” You could have smacked yourself for not having everything set up for him. “We don’t have a ladder per se, but this step stool should work fine.” You pulled it out from behind the desk along with a scoring tool, a spray bottle filled with a vinegar and water solution, and a putty knife. “I also grabbed the clock radio from my room if you wanted to listen to some music. Might help pass the time.”
Eddie nodded, watching carefully as you switched the radio on and tuned the dial to a Top 40 station. He shook his head the moment the electric beat of Haddaway’s “What is Love” played through the tinny speakers.
“Absolutely not,” he said with a scoff, dropping the supplies right where he stood, footsteps heavy even with the cloth underneath him. Without another word, he spun the knob past the static until the sound of an electric guitar crackled through. He bobbed his head a few times, finding the rhythm. “This’ll do.”
“Not a Eurodance fan?”
His back was turned to you as he returned to the task at hand which left him unable to see the sarcastic smirk you sported. “Fuck no.” He stepped up on the tool and began cutting into the old wallpaper, puffing out an irritated laugh. “I can’t believe—scratch—you voluntarily—scratch—listen to that–scratch–shit.” His biceps flexed with each flick of the blade in a consistent rhythm.
Drumming your fingernails on the desk, you twirled your pen in your free hand as you reread your own handwriting. You’d stayed at the library and filled notebook pages with bullet points about early childhood development until a squirrely librarian kicked you out at closing time. The choppy sentence fragments begged to be fleshed out into a fully-formed essay, but you couldn’t bring yourself to focus.
Write words. Make edits. Add a comma. Do something, anything, dammit.
Almost an hour passed without you making an iota of progress on your paper. The words swam on the page until they just looked like inky squiggles with no real meaning, your brain blank as if you’d never written anything in your life. Cool air tickled your nose as you exhaled through your lips. Why couldn’t you just concentrate?
“It’s this music,” you muttered to yourself, too low for your company to hear. Your temples throbbed with frustration, and you reached over and snapped back to the previous station.
Eddie’s head whipped around at the sudden change, frowning when he heard pop music instead of the metal that had just been playing. “Seriously?” He leaned one hand on the wall and threw the other up in exasperation.
“Yes, seriously,” you bit back, teeth clenched in annoyance. “I can’t focus on my writing with that on.”
Eddie grumbled something unintelligible but went back to work, the scratching serving as a strange backdrop to the song.
Janet Jackson faded out to a too-chipper deejay. “You folks know what time it is!” His voice reminded you of old-school toothpaste commercials, over-exaggerated and unnaturally polished. “That’s right; it’s time for Rad or Retch—where I play a song from a new artist, and you call in and let me know whether you think it’s rad or if it makes you wanna retch!”
Eddie rolled his eyes, adding an exasperated “Jesus H. Christ,” under his breath.
“This one’s called ‘Watch Me Leave’ by Death’s Echo, a grunge group from—”
The announcement came to an abrupt end as Eddie nearly leaped from the stool to the desk and yanked the plug out of its socket. The two-pronged head hit the floor with a soft thud.
“Hey!” Your eyes widened in confusion and then disbelief, flickering over to where he stood. You expected him to wear a scowl that matched your own; instead, he looked like he’d just taken a knife to the gut, and you took a step back. “Whoa, you okay?”
Eddie tensed the moment he detected your sympathetic tone, shoulders pinched and jaw rigid. “‘M fine.” He pressed the heel of his left hand atop his right knuckles until they cracked. “Sorry.” He bent down and gently plugged the cord back into the wall, but you immediately flicked the power button to the off-position.
It was silent for a full minute, save for the scorer against the wall and the scratch of pen on paper. When Eddie finally spoke, his voice was so soft that you barely heard it.
“That was my band.”
Confusion creased your brows. You set down your pen and stole a glance at him. His body remained facing the wall, but he was no longer working, hands lamely at his sides. “What?”
“Death’s Echo was, uh,” he shook a rogue curl from his eyes, “that was my band.”
“Oh.” Awkwardness seeped into the room and filled every crevice as you wracked your brain for a suitable response. “But…not anymore?”
Eddie clicked his tongue. “Nope.” The p sound popped softly as though signaling the discussion’s end, but there was a pregnant pause before he started removing the wallpaper again.
“Why not?” The question sprang from your tongue, curiosity getting the best of you.
A hesitant chuckle accompanied his sigh. “I thought you didn't make small talk with strangers.” He climbed back on the step stool and ripped off a strip of paper.
“I thought we weren’t strangers anymore,” you quipped back, not missing the smile that ghosted his lips.
“Fair enough.” Eddie conceded easily, not at all angry to be proven wrong. He bit the inside of his cheek and stared up at the yellow-tinged lighting overhead before slicing into the wallpaper. “Sometimes you think you want something, but it turns out to be a steaming pile of horseshit.” The last word was punctuated by a grunt, and the last panel of wallpaper fluttered to the ground. “That’s the music industry in a nutshell.”
You nodded in agreement despite an obvious lack of knowledge.
“They sign your band,” he continued, aiming the spray bottle nozzle at the wall and pulling the trigger, “and you think it’s because they like you. Or at least your music, your sound, whatever.” He wrinkled his nose as he got an unexpected whiff of the vinegar solution’s pungency. “But you’re really just a front for whatever they want to sell. Which, apparently, is grunge.”
You had too many questions. They probably referred to record producers or agents or some other bigwigs, you surmised, but what did they do that made Eddie so cynical?
That was far too loaded to ask, at least in that moment, so you opted for a more humorous follow-up. “You mean it wasn’t all sex, drugs, and rock ‘n roll?” you joked, but Eddie didn’t share in your lightheartedness.
“At the beginning, when we first got signed, yeah.” His brown eyes exuded wistfulness, remembrance of better times. He blinked twice and snapped himself out of it. “We put out a few albums that didn’t completely flop, I guess. And we were the opening act on a couple of tours. Got a good chunk of money in the bank.”
That explained the Calvin Klein underwear he was wearing on that first night. You capped your pen and leaned in, trying not to be overly inquisitive but unable to contain yourself. “So…what happened?” What led you here?
“We get called into a meeting, and we’re all thinking that the label’s gonna tell us we’re headlining, right? Maybe not, like, The Garden, but bigger venues than we usually played. But, uh…” he trailed off and rubbed the tip of his nose with an open palm, “it was an ultimatum: shift from metal to grunge, or get dropped.”
You listened intently as Eddie relayed the ordeal. The label executives had cited the increasing popularity of Nirvana and Pearl Jam along with decreasing interest in heavy metal bands. “Cobain’s selling; Ozzy isn’t,” they’d explained. If Death’s Echo wanted to play to packed arenas and have their music on mainstream radio, they had to adapt to the times.
“I told them we weren’t sellouts and to kiss my ass,” Eddie said to you, huffing out an annoyed breath. “But the rest of the band didn’t give a shit about that; if those suits told them to jump, they’d say ‘how high.’ So, I quit and waited for them to come crawling back.”
He didn’t elaborate after that. He didn’t need to. Because if they’d done as Eddie had hoped, he wouldn’t be performing manual labor just to live in a struggling motel, basking in the gloominess that he wore like a second skin.
“If you could go back and do it differently, would you?” You grimaced at your own intrusiveness. “Sorry, that was—”
“It’s fine.” Eddie didn’t give an answer right away, his teeth grating against his lower lip. “Y’know, I’d like to say no, but losing your record deal, your apartment, your girlfriend, your so-called ‘friends,’ and every nice thing you own can make a guy kinda cynical.”
Girlfriend?
It was far from the most dire item on that list, but it needled at you. Maybe it was the mental image of Eddie watching everything get taken from him and then adding heartbreak on top of it all.
“How about you?”
His voice yanked you from your thoughts and had your heart in your throat. “Huh?”
“You. Your whole deal.” He gestured at you with the scraper. “Why you’re always doing homework like a little nerd.” You couldn't detect a note of taunting in his teasing, only playfulness, just as it had been that very first night.
You scowled for only a second before a smile broke through. “Don’t you have wallpaper to remove?”
Eddie snorted out a laugh. “I see how it is: when it’s my shit, I’m free to talk. But when it’s your shit, I’m a lowly employee.” He held up both hands in mock surrender. “My deepest apologies, Heiress.”
You didn’t bother to argue, choosing instead to pivot to a new subject altogether. “How long does this take, anyway?” Walking out from behind the desk to inspect his work, you ran your finger down the wall. Once you got past the stench of vinegar, he was actually doing a pretty good job.
“You think you could do better?” He saw your gentle ribbing and upped the ante, holding out the putty scraper as if saying, be my guest.
Plucking it from his grasp, you smirked and chose a spot right at eye level. Challenge accepted.
Though the glue had softened considerably, removing it still required decent muscle. You put your bodyweight into it and pushed through the resistance, but you only managed to pull off a little bit.
You heard Eddie laugh through his nose as he stood behind you, watching you struggle. “Harder than it looks, huh?” He ignored your middle finger and stepped a half-inch closer. “Let me help.”
One calloused hand dwarfed yours, his fingers wrapping around where your fist held the scraper. The other found purchase on the bicep of your free arm where your T-shirt’s cuff met skin, stabilizing without entrapping you. You could easily get out of his grasp if you wanted.
You stayed there.
He tightened his grip around yours and made short, downward strokes, admittedly taking off far more glue than you had. “There ya go,” he murmured. His breath was warm on your neck, gooseflesh rising when he spoke. You hoped he wouldn’t notice. “Just like that.”
Butterflies beat their wings in your stomach, a result of the unexpected proximity compounded by an unmet need for connection that starkly contrasted the night shift’s normal solitude. A loose tendril of his hair tickled against your ear, and the realization of how close your bodies actually were shattered whatever spell had been cast.
Eddie pulled away quickly, the air cooling where his hand once rested. Did he also feel that sudden loss of contact, or was it all in your head?
With a shaky breath, you stepped aside and silently returned the tool to him. “Should probably leave this to the expert,” you muttered, forcing nervous laughter. “I have to get back to writing anyway.”
His eyes bored into you as you walked back to the desk, but neither of you said another word. You glanced over at him every so often, noting the perspiration dampening his collar and under his arms as he toiled away at the glue and wished you had a water bottle to offer him.
Maybe next time.
You got halfway through the first body paragraph when Eddie spoke again.
“You’re really not gonna talk?”
You looked up to see him swipe his forearm along his brows as he shot you a tired grin.
“We just had a whole conversation,” you pointed out, returning your attention to your essay.
“About me,” he said. He wiped his palms on his pants, leaving behind a sweaty print, and traipsed over to you. “I mean, every time I see you, you’re either going to school or coming back from school or doing work for school…”
You shrugged, no big deal. “Okay, yeah, I go to school.”
“For what?”
Shit. “Hospitality and hotel management.”
“Really.” Eddie leaned over and snatched up your paper. You reached out to grab it back, but it was too late. The bridge of his nose scrunched as he read the opening paragraph to himself. “Doesn’t look like hospitality to me.” Amusement raised his brows. “Care to explain?”
It was the last thing you wanted to do, but you felt strangely obligated. He’d confided in you, so you should at least moderately indulge him.
“Fine,” you relented, “I’m studying psychology.” That might have been the first time you’d ever said those words aloud in the motel lobby; it was oddly freeing.
Eddie nodded and continued to scan the paper. “You wanna be a shrink?”
“Social worker.”
He let out a low whistle. “That’s a tough gig. Especially if you’re working with kids.” He shook the essay pages for emphasis.
“Yeah. I know.”
“Right.” He shoved one hand in his pants pocket. “What made you decide to be a social worker?”
You breathed out a laugh. “You want the easy answer or the real one?”
He didn’t hesitate before answering. “Real one. Always.” He returned your essay and rested his un-pocketed hand on the desk. Inquiring eyes beckoned you to continue.
With less trepidation than you’d anticipated, you tell him the story of that fateful day in the summer of 1987, just two years after you’d graduated from high school.
You were still working the afternoon shift, and summer break brought its usual influx of guests. People came and went in blurs of luggage, but there was one particular patron who had made her presence known.
“Hi!”
You peered over the desk to find the source of the lively greeting. A young girl, no older than five, stared back at you, syrupy grape stickiness surrounding her lips. The cause was most likely a popsicle, as evidenced by the purple stained stick clenched in her right hand.
“Um, hi,” you said with a smile that was, for the first time in a long while, not encased in customer service insincerity. “What’s your name?” And where did you come from?
Unfazed by your bewilderment, she introduced herself as Izzy and asked you if you wanted to play. “We just have to stay here, or else my mommy will get mad,” she explained with urgency.
You nodded slowly, sorting through the information without raising any alarm. “And where is your mommy?”
Izzy’s hazel eyes darted back towards the hallway. “In our room. She’s with a friend so I can’t go in.” She dropped her voice to what she considered a whisper, but it was still clear as day. “Her friend is a boy.”
Your stomach turned. Of course. Instead of watching her child, this mother was probably shooting up with her boyfriend of the week.
“I can’t play right now, but you can sit here with me until your mommy and her friend come back out,” you said. “I have paper and pens if you wanna draw.”
This satisfied her, and she plopped down on the floor and patted the spot next to her. That day hadn’t been particularly hectic, so you obliged and sat.
“What’re you gonna draw?” Izzy asked, reaching for a blue pen. You didn’t have time to answer before she proudly announced, “I’m gonna draw a flower. Do you like flowers?”
“Mhm.”
Izzy smiled as she surrounded a circle with swirling loops. “You can draw a flower, too. Maybe a rose. Or a sunflower!”
Her excitement at the latter option was all you needed. “Sunflower it is, Miss Izzy.” You drew a circle of your own and filled it with a cross-hatched pattern, curating pointed-tipped petals around it.
“D’you have crayons?” she asked, not looking up from her own flower.
You put down your pen and offered a pitying frown. “No, I’m sorry.”
“S’okay. You should get some, though. ‘Cause you can draw prettier flowers with crayons.”
The two of you stayed on the floor for ten minutes. All the while, she quizzed you on your favorite color, animal, food, and TV show. She was halfway through a heated explanation of why Friend Bear was superior to Share Bear when a frantic voice called out her name.
“Mommy!” Izzy practically flew into her mother’s arms. You watched as the woman’s entire body sagged in relief, pulling her daughter in close. A man trailed behind her, discreetly zipping up his fly and walking out the front door.
“Izzy, I told you to sit in the hall and eat your ice pop,” her mom gently scolded, words muffled by her lips being pressed to Izzy’s scalp.
Izzy scrunched her nose in confusion. “But I finished it.” She pointed at the empty stick, now on the ground where she’d been sitting, as proof. In true childlike fashion, she jumped to a new topic without waiting for the first conversation to conclude. “Mommy, you wanna see what I drawed?”
“Of course, baby.” She easily feigned excitement as Izzy presented her with a series of scribbles that were meant to be various flowers, people, and farm animals. “Wow! I think you’re gonna be an artist one day.”
The little girl continued chatting, blissfully unaware of the panic she’d inadvertently caused. Her mom allowed herself to look away for just a moment to glance at you, mouthing a tiny “thank you” and blinking her tear-filled eyes.
“And…I don’t know,” you lamely supplied as you wrapped up the story. “I guess I realized that I had all of these assumptions, this sort of preconceived notion that this woman was a deadbeat parent, but she obviously loved Izzy more than anything.” You picked at your thumbnail nervously. “No one should have to sell their body for money just to survive. She deserved better than that.”
Eddie stayed quiet for a moment, absorbing everything you’d thrown at him. “And you wanted to help her,” he finally said.
“Yeah.” You thought back to the way her gaze simultaneously held gratitude and guilt. Her daughter was safe, but she knew that this was not the final time she’d be in this predicament.
The experience had awakened a realization in you: working at the motel was never your dream, but it kept a roof over your head and food in your belly. You weren’t left to navigate the world on your own. Independence was a privilege, not a mandate.
“For what it’s worth,” Eddie broke in, “I think you’ll be a great social worker someday.” He rapped his knuckles on the desk twice and slipped back to the awaiting task; despite insisting that you talked to him while he worked, he hadn’t touched any of the tools while you spoke.
Your smile was a thank you, and you tuned the radio back to the metal station Eddie had chosen earlier. He didn’t say anything else, but you noted the subtle tap of his toe against the drop cloth.
Eddie worked for a few more hours until he’d stripped the wall of all paper and glue. “All right,” he said, balancing the step stool on two fingers. Sleepiness softened his own smile, all lips and no teeth. “Let me know when the new wallpaper comes in. You, uh, know where I live.”
“Will do.” Your thumb absently grazed against the words you’d just written, smudging them. You rubbed at the black ink seeping into your skin, silently chastising your own carelessness. “Good night, Eddie.”
He stretched and scratched at the U-neck of his collar, exposing a sliver of chest hair.
“Sweet dreams, Heiress.”
--
taglist:
@theintimatewriter @mandyjo8719 @storiesbyrhi @lady-munson @moonmark98 @squidscottjeans @therealbaberuthless @emxxblog @munson-mjstan @loves0phelia @kthomps914 @aysheashea @munsonsbtch @mmunson86 @b-irock @ginasellsbooks @erinekc @the-unforgivenn @dashingdeb16 @micheledawn1975 @yujyujj @eddies-acousticguitar @daisy-munson @kellsck @foreveranexpatsposts @mykuup @chatteringfox @feelinglikeineedlotsofnaps @sapphire4082 @katethetank @sidthedollface2 @eddies-stinky-battle-jacket @mysteris-things @mrsjellymunson @josephquinnsfreckles @the-disaster-in-waiting @eddielowe @hugdealer @rip-quizilla @munson-girl @fishwithtitz @costellation-hunter @cloudroomblog @emsgoodthinkin
#eddie munson#eddie stranger things#eddie x reader#eddie x you#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson x f!reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson smut#eddie munson angst#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson fanfic#stranger things fanfic#fanfic#eddie munson stranger things#stranger things#lam
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DISCLAIMER: THIS IS A RANT!!!
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It’s never too late to manifest your dream life. If you’re sitting around contemplating on life, stop. Stop messing around and get your desires. Live your dream life. Manifest the Car you’ve been wanting. Get your sp! Get that mansion you’ve been eyeing. Stop sitting around waiting for something to change and be the change. It all starts from within. You CAN have whatever you want. There’s nothing too big or too small. You can make the “ impossible “ possible l. There’s nothing out of your control. Everything you want, wants you 10x more. Stop sitting around feeling sorry for yourself hoping things will work out, while still living in your undesired state. Do whatever you have to do to get in the wish fulfilled and stay there. Oh you fell out of the wish fulfilled ? So what get back in it. There’s nothing or anyone holding you back or keeping you down but YOU. Stop sitting around wishing you could have this and wishing things could’ve been this way, You wanna know why they aren’t ? BECAUSE OF YOU. NOBODY BUT YOU. Feeling sorry for yourself isn’t going to get you that job, Or those shoes, or that car, Or that trip to Hawaii, Or your sp back. Everything and Everyone had to follow your rules. You want that house right ? “ but it’s already sold “ so ? lol. What does that mean ? There’s over hundreds of houses that person doesn’t even like that house anymore, They’re moving right now as we speak that house is YOURS! You want your sp back ? “ But he has a new girlfriend ): “ ( This applies to any and everyone i’m just using he as of right now ) . aww that’s cute. Anyways, They’ve broken up because they’re not meant for each other because your sp is meant for you and you only, and the girl ( or boy ) has found they’re soulmate and they’re now in a happy relationship, which isn’t with your sp because, your sp is attracted to you and you only, Your sp doesn’t want a relationship with anyone but you. They’re personalities clash because your the only person that’s understands sp and that’s one of the many reasons they love and cherish you. You want that car right ? “ I can’t afford it right now “. Anything is possible, you would win it in a raffle, It could go on sale for 1 cent or a dollar, Someone could gift it to you, You can win it in a giveaway or contest. Anything could happen, Or if you could win $1,000,000 on the lottery and the car is $100,000. Now you have a car and over $800,000. ( Yes you can manifest them not taking taxes off your winning ). You want that new pool right ? “ But my parents said I can’t get one “ is this your reality or theirs ? ( don’t say that to your parents though 😭 ) EIYPO. So what they said that, You said you have a new pool so now you have one. Whatever everyone else thinks or says doesn’t matter. It’s yours. Oh look .. a random truck just pulled in your yard. Wait the they’re delivering a .. NEW POOL. With all that being said. Get whatever you want. Start the year off right ( it’s still the beginning of the year technically 😭 ). You can have what you want, Do what you want, Go where you want, Be who you want. Live your dream life, STOP SEARCHING AND START APPLY, STOP SEEKING ( checking the 3D, looking and hoping for results ) AND START KNOWING. IT’S ALREADY YOURS GET THAT IN YOUR HEAD. And calm down, idc about how long you have until this and that. Time isn’t real. Calm down the clock isn’t ticking. Your sp isn’t going anywhere, That house or those shoes or that car won’t be growing legs and walking away. You’ve got all the time in the world.
#law of assumption#affirmations#eiypo#living in the end#loassumption#loass#manifestation#states law of assumption#success story#edward art#states loa#visualization#affirm and persist#affirmyourreality#postive affirmations#create your dream life
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Back on my: Holotuber Jedi Youngling - OC Thoughts >.>
Prev <-
You think folks debate at first? Shtick or Real Thing? Like? No... no WAY could that be one of those Mysterious Mystic Space Cult Kids. No WAY. They would NEVER let their kid be unsupervised on the Net.
But like... (and since I'm a She, gonna use She, but realistically could be any pronouns here) she LOOKS like she's recording from a...? Is that a closet? This one looks like a vent. THIS video is definitely some sort of maintenance area. So she's definitely sneaking...
Ooooh! Thaaaat's a Jedi! REAL FUCKING JEDI. Just dropped down silently behind her. Arms crossed. Mouse droids be snitching. BUSTED.
:T
"Uuuuuuh, h-heeey, Master Uvalii. Fancy seeing YOU here!"
"Yes. Quite interesting isn't it? Since you should not be able to access this area at all, much less to achieve holonet access. Of which we are both aware you are expressly Forbidden To DO unsupervised."
".........I can explain?"
"Please. Do."
*feed ends, chat goes fucking NUTS*
Like? Oh SHIT. Baby Jedi in troooouble. But also? Oh no! What's gonna happen?! Are they gonna be okay?! S-should they TELL somebody? What do Jedi do to kids who disobey them? Does anyone actually KNOW? What DO any of us know about them!? Someone find their Com Code! MA! MA, I need you to yell at space monks! An adorable CHILD MIGHT BE AT STAKE!!! D:>
Even coming BACK on? For a supervised feed? Going "no, I'm just in trouble. Have to right paragraphs and meditate on 'why I felt the need to do this' (even though I KNOW why, not that they'll LISTEN. They just hope I'll meditate until I come to an answer they LIKE)" under the offscreen supervision of a teacher or Creche master?
Whole ass Net gonna be like "youngling! Blink Twice if they're holding you hostage! We can afford bounty hunters! We got a group pot thing going already!!! Aaaaaaaa-!"
Like? *waves at the camera and chat* she TOLD you. They don't believe you. This is part of WHY she wants to do what she's doing. Palpatine's and his Master's machinations have been building for a while. Eroding trust. The Jedi have become strange, dangerous, semi-mythical cryptids with magic powers we must HOPE are benevolent.
Not people.
Why would they expect some unfeeling, magical, sword-wielding space legend to be patient or kind to children? To even have the capacity? We are said to kidnap children and be unfeeling. Can not reach enough people to show otherwise. To reveal the mundanity of our lives. The traditions. The norms.
Food, children, laughter.
The Common Good.
And like? She obviously isn't gonna name Sith-ly NAMES. Not on CAMERA. But her lil "why I wanna play the tooka game and chat about lunch" speech? Convincing. Calms chat down. Still in trouble, mind you. But... provided it's SUPERVISED? And they work out some sort of effective moderation? Alright.
It's a matter of SAFETY, youngling. And no matter HOW much good you wish to do? They will NOT be sacrificing children to achieve it. That is NOT the Jedi way. There are plenty of old masters who would live nothing more then to ramble all day into cameras, if only to here themselves talk. (Oh? Good to know. Guest speakers pog?)
Like? Imagine making a game. Have a "mystical sage" character you TOTALLY BASED of Jedi in it. And your feed gets? Flooded with XD reactions in response to some smol bby streamer playing it? You go to check it out. Cause you're kinda a big deal on your planet. And?
Oh No™
That tiny streamer? Is a tiny JEDI streamer. Who is sitting there, in the stills, going O.o like "Wut." And the next still? Her lil friends are pulled in. The next? A teenager. The NEXT. An adult. The one after THAT. A few adults looking over her shoulder. Then a CROWD. All deeply, deeply confused looking.
The comments are DYING. Howling with laughter. The Jedi were so earnest. Trying to identify which Era you must be referencing. Which sect. But the head dress... cultural, maybe? It doesn't fit with the features though. Could be adopted. A hint at, I believe the term was, "lore"? No, no, those are DEFINITELY padawan beads! But so MANY? In THAT order?
They aren't even connected to a braid! And he's supposed to be a Master, right? But, wait. Perhaps it's meant to suggest he is a Padawan of the Force itself? A student of life? No, that wouldn't make sense! Stolen? It could suggest he has TAKEN the beads? Is regurgitating stolen texts without true understanding? Much like wearing bead he did not EARN?
They keep going and going. Ripping your character design to SHREDS. Picking it apart. Not even meanly! They are genuinely confused. AND IT ONLY MAKES THE CHAT LAUGH HARDER. Because it devolves into a MARATHON, after the game has been paused, of chat spamming different character names? For the Jedi to go "???" Over.
T...that's not? What? How does he even EAT in those robes? And those ones don't seem very non-humanoid friendly. Is he FLOATING HIS SWORD WITH THE FORCE? WHY!? Just keep it on your belt!!!
And? Now every game developer in the galaxy is PARANOID AF. Either make their mystics Very Obviously NOT Jedi rip offs... or shoot a "if I pay you $20 will you consult on something real quick" email. It's just... just easier man. Last guy got laughed into oblivion. Oof.
They can bill it as "Realism" or something. See guys? WE do or reasearch! Give us your credits!
Oh YEAH? Says the growing fan base of this Funky Lil Monk Child. Then put you game where your communication organs are. Send her the game, you cowards.
Do It.
Cut to "oh no, guys! The sorta-jedi died! What? Next objective? No. No we gotta give him a funeral! Oh good, we ca-BURY HIM?! What!? No!!! I could understand if he was from a race that held beliefs that bodies must be returned to the soil from whence they came, but this guy is a SORTA-JEDI! Absolutely NOT!"
"Let's cut down some trees. WE are building him a PYRE. Never ran one of these, but I can look it up. Gimme a moment. Okay. Draaaaag, him on to it. Where's his weapon. There! Thanks chat! On it goes too. Okay. Looking it up..... got it. Ahem...!"
*hold funeral for the sage character by burning his body*
*mods are IMMEDIATELY created to change the "burial" scene to a "Funeral pyre" with somber music*
Just? I can not let go? Of how the subtle shift would spread? Not in shining senatorial halls, but in class rooms and living rooms, dingy pubs and long hyperdrive flights? Anywhere boredom might be found and "hey check this out" might spread? Where someone else, might overhear and get curious?
Lik?? Imagine being the bounty hunter, who fuckin HATES Jedi, thinks they're sanctimonious BASTARDS, hearing someone snort laugh. Just... just fucking CHOKE on their cheep beer. Oh? Now everyone's interested. What's funny?
It's a teeny, tiny, lil jedi youngling. Playing that new Bounty 5 game. Unrealistic as hell. But they are going "I am a MASTER of stealth. A LEGEND of the hunt. You will not see me. I am sneaky. So, so, sneeeeakyyyyy!" As they concentrate on sneaking through back alleys.
Only for their character to fall RIGHT of a ledge, bounce against three buildings, smash into a parked Speeder, and roll right into a cut scene. Where they are call the "greatest bounty hunter of all time".
They look so incredulous.
"Are you SURE? Cause I'm fairly certain that phrase alone is banned for the trouble it causes, near most Bounty outposts. Could be the concussion talking though!"
They are? A sarcastic lil SHIT. Roast EVERYTHING. Know a surprising number of them. Given that they gave the Duros support character a modded in hat. Named him Definitely-Not-Cad. The fake look mustache REALLY sells it. Yeah, Bane. Clearly not you. YOU don't have a mustaches. *watches as she unleashes the Not Cad Bane like a highly tactical meat thresher on legs* brutal lil shit. They like her.
Granted, it's only BECAUSE it's not real she does so.
But I just? Have so many ideas? Spam the Galaxy with "this is who we are. We are people. Develop bonds with us. Care about us. KNOW us." Because the Sith can not possibly kill us all. Can not stop truth, so widely spread. Light dies, when you smother it in closed hands, hidden away in dark and long forgotten places. When you let fear dictate your actions.
It thrives in the open. With people. With the chance to SPREAD. Grow. Bloom.
It's about talking and caring. Being heard. What better place? Then on the screen in their pocket?
@babbling-babull @hypewinter @hdgnj @legitimatesatanspawn @spidori @spidori
#minji's writing#star wars#star wars prompt#holotuber au#want of a nail au#flap of a butterflies wings
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