#Oh and I’ve been thinking about linking the songs I put on loop when I draw things like this

[bluehexagone]

Architecture creature, will probably digitalize this later

[galacticlamps]

fanfic writer asks 🤡🛒🎶🌞🤲? (I realise this is a lot and you were trying to keep them short gdjkhf I am SO sorry. no pressure to answer all of them haha)

🤡 What’s a line, scene, or exchange you’ve written that made you laugh?

This did give me pause because I know I’ve laughed at certain lines as I was writing them before, but rn I can’t remember any that are actually funny in and of themselves? I don’t even mean that like ‘on second thought, I amuse myself and no one else’ - I just think I’m probably more of a dramatic irony type of person than a crafter of fabulous one-liners in either dialogue or narration. Plus Two & Jamie lend themselves to that so well, so perhaps what I laughed at was less my writing and more just a general sense of, “Oh, you two idiots who don’t know what I (and every single other person in this fandom) know.” Like maybe what happens in Itemized or Visitation Rights isn’t like, laughter funny but eye-roll funny? Or maybe I’m just having trouble remembering smaller/more immediately funny bits so all I can do right now is talk plots/themes. That is also a possibility.

🛒 What are some common things you incorporate in your fics? Themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.

Well, surely “oh you idiots” is up there as either a theme or a feeling or something, but I believe that’s just a necessary symptom of being a Two/Jamie writer. As for me personally, hmm...

Do you know that bit in Much Ado About Nothing where Benedick’s like, “There’s a double meaning in that!” and the joke is that no, really that means exactly what you think it does you himbo - but also, this is a Shakespeare play & you are actively being played by your friends so okay, technically, sure there’s a double meaning in all of this, but calm down alright it’s not like you discovered anything that wasn’t already painfully clear? That bit? I feel like I love any chance to write something like that - characters knowing one another well enough to talk about one thing while talking about another even though it’s kinda obvious and #notthatdeep. They/I do not get points for being clever or anything because everyone knows what they’re saying/alluding to even if they get some kick or whatever out of not stating it directly. But it’s still fun to write, especially when characters have a rapport that supports that kind of thing.

Or did you mean something more concrete? I feel like I pay a lot of attention to physicality - again, easy when you’re writing Two/Jamie & that’s so much of who they are - but I kinda need to be able to trace the positions & movements of everyone in a fic all the time, so I feel like gestures & touch come up a lot with me, even if they aren’t strictly necessary to the story? I also catch myself pointing out the quality of light in most scenes I write, not necessarily as a thing to focus on, but another one of those struggle-not-to-mention-it things. But hey, I have a url to live up to!

🎶 Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

I do - current length of my Two/Jamie playlist is over 18 hours (whoops! I realize that's not really a playlist at all it's just a big group of songs that can be made to make me think of them) and I’ve also totally made smaller breakout playlists to help with focus on individual fics before. I stop when I want to get serious about editing, and then when I’m proofreading I can put music back on only if I have one of those dedicated smaller playlists, otherwise I’ll risk getting some wires crossed on vibes.

But what have I been playing on loop lately? Well in the “linked (tightly) to a specific fic” category, Pink Floyd’s “Us & Them” has been required listening while reading/working on the heart of one wip. And more generally I’ve been listening to Skerryvore’s album Evo a lot lately, and that’s got a few songs on it that also feature on the Two/Jamie playlist for various reasons.

🌞 Do you have a preferred time of day to write?

Answered! Spoiler alert: it boils down to ‘literally whenever I can’ - not very fun ik

🤲 Would you please share a snippet of a wip?

No :)

I’m kidding. But you might wish I wasn’t after you see it.

I won’t forget you, you know.

Jamie’s cheeks burned with the embarrassment of his own naivety. Wounded, he wondered if the Time Lords had laughed at him then, knowing what was about to happen. He wondered if the Doctor knew, and only put on a brave face so Jamie could go on believing that for as long as he would remember wanting to. But it hadn’t worked, and he remembered now – but also, he remembered now.

Deeper than the embarrassment but stronger too, there was a spark, a tiny ember glowing inside him: he hadn’t forgotten. The Time Lords had done their best but it had only stopped him for a little while – a few months, a handful of weeks. All-powerful masters of the universe, and they couldn’t even keep him from remembering for longer than that. No, he hadn’t forgotten. He’d just been a little dazed - distracted, that was all. But neither his heart nor his mind had let go of the Doctor, and they wouldn’t now either. It was dangerous, hope, Jamie knew that – knew the things it could lead people to do, the risks they might take in its name. But he had beaten their memory block after all, and if that could happen, then maybe . . .

It might be foolish of him to hope, but as he turned his face towards the stars with bleary, tear-filled eyes, he found it hard not to.

Because if he could remember, what could the Doctor do?

[skinnyducky]

lullaby (pt. 2 to cherry) // v.h.

This part went through so many changes. Originally, they weren't getting back together but I ultimately decided for Y/n to take Vinnie back because I'm a sucker for happy endings and second chances. Kinda came out longer than I wanted it too, but meh. This part is heavily inspired by the song "Lullaby" by Mariah Carey. Other than that, I hope you enjoy!

link to part 1

Word Count: 2219, unedited

WARNING: language, mentions of partying, alcohol, drugs, and a very fluffy yet cheesy ending.

---------

It had been a few months since you and Vinnie had bid your goodbyes. Within those months, you were doing great. You had aced your first semester classes, you just moved into your apartment, and you were at the highlight of your life. The only thing you lacked was someone to bask in the happiness with. To say you missed Vinnie was an understatement, but you were too prideful to actually tell yourself that.

You tried dating again, but no one could hold a candle to your Vinnie. Plus, you hadn’t been keeping up with him on social media or anything, so you didn’t know if he had moved on and forgotten you. You didn’t want to reopen old wounds, so you refrained from contacting him.

But little did you know, not a day went by that Vinnie didn’t think about you. He constantly thought about what he did, beating himself up for even having the thought of another girl while he was with you. But he didn’t know what to do. Your relationship was dying, and none of you bothered to even talk about it. So, to him, he thought there was nothing that he could do…thus causing him to do what he did. Thankfully, he didn’t go too far with the girl, but still…he knew what he did was terrible.

Dating for him was pretty much impossible. Much similar to your situation, there was no one who could fill your shoes. The way you danced around in his head during the day and ruled his dreams at night…no one could do that for him. You were one of a kind, and with as many offers he got, he was torn that none of them were from you. He was a funk…a really bad one.

His friends and housemates took notice of this and being the best friends they were, they decided to drag him out of the house and to a party at Triller Compound because that’s what every heartbroken friend needed when they’re down. To be surrounded by booze, loud music, and sweaty people…oh yeah, that’s what he definitely needed right at this moment.

“C’mon, at least smile a little bit.” Alex said, looking back the upset boy through the rearview mirror.

“Smile about what? Going to some party that I didn’t even want to go to.”

“You seriously need to get over, Y/n.” Thomas sighed, turning to Vinnie from the passenger seat. “What happened between to you two happened for a reason. You just gotta let it go.”

Mia scoffed from beside Vinnie and slapped Thomas on the shoulder. “Thomas, it’s not that easy!”

“I’m just saying, if it were me, I wouldn’t be all upset and everything.”

“So, you’re saying if we broke up…you wouldn’t be sad?” Mia responded sharply, obviously joking.

Thomas nearly choked, looking back at his girlfriend. “I-I’m not saying that. I mean, if…it’s just that…it’s different, okay. He cheated.”

“Did you have to bring that up?” Mia rolled her eyes and turned to Vinnie. “Don’t listen to him, okay. It was your relationship, and sure you messed it up, but…you still can be sad about it. I think.”

Vinnie huffed and stayed silent, no bothering to listen to anyone. He didn’t need people reminding him of his mistakes, that was the whole reason why he was being a downer. He just couldn’t forgive himself. There were no ounce of words or speeches that anyone could give him that would make him feel better. This was just something that he’d have to get over with time.

It was only minutes before they pulled up to the packed mansion and stumbled out of Alex’s car, Vinnie being the last out. He watched as his friends rushed to the house before heading inside. Upon entering the house, scenes of people grinding and drinking came into his sights. The sound of trap music filled his ears as the strong stench of weed brushed across his nose. He sneered before walking to the backyard. He scanned the area for any sober person he knew, hoping to find someone to complain about his situation to.

As he searched, his eyes landed on a familiar head of y/h/c hair. He furrowed his brows, trying to get a better view of the person. “That can’t be who I think it is,” he thought to himself as he moved in closer.

That was when you looked to side, and he caught a glimpse of your profile. His heart nearly stopped beating the minute he saw your face. He breathed hitched in his threat as he tried to keep himself from hyperventilating. He never thought he’d see you again, yet here you were…just a few feet away from him. He had forgotten the fact that you two had mutual acquaintances, so it came to no surprise that you’d come to this party.

Vinnie watched as you threw you head back in laughter at something one of your friend’s said. There wasn’t much he could do but stare at you. He didn’t know what to do. It’d be risky to even think you’d want to talk to him, so he refrained from walking up to you. He didn’t want to bring up painful memories. It was a good thing you hadn’t seen him yet.

---------

“You’re joking!” You smiled. “Come to think of it though, Bryce would be the one to try and drink tequila off your tits.”

Your friend, Y/bff/n snorted, “I know right!? I was like…sir, I am not that kind of a girl. Please have a good night.”

The two of you continued to laugh at her situation before you heard her go silent. You calmed yourself down, looking at her shocked face. Confused, you followed her eyes and turned around to see what had her so shook up. At that moment, your eyes met the very person you had least expected to see tonight…

Vinnie.

He was staring right back at you. The minute he realized you were looking back at him, he nearly freaked out. He attempted to look around, playing as if he hadn’t been eyeing you, but you had already caught him in the act.

“Is that…?”

“Vinnie, yep. That’s him.” You said, placing a hand on your hip. “I wonder what he’s doing here.”

Y/bff/n snickered. “It’s a party, Y/n.”

“I know that, but I honestly didn’t expect him to be here tonight.”

You two watched the boy look around frantically and you couldn’t help but smile a bit. You missed him and judging from the sight in front of you…it seemed as if he did too. But still, you were a bit out of the loop. Who’s to say he hasn’t already moved on. You couldn’t intrude on his happiness, that wouldn’t be fair.

“You should go talk to him.” Y/bff/n said.

You looked at her with your eyebrows raised. “You really think so?”

“It’s obvious he’s still into you, babes. And considering the fact you’ve been looking at him with those goo-goo eyes, I think you’re still into him too.”

“I don’t know, Y/bff/n. I mean…what if he’s seeing someone else.”

“There’s no way. If he’s trying that hard to pretend that he wasn’t just staring at you, he’s still hung up on you. And, even if he is seeing someone, that doesn’t mean you can’t just go and talk to him.”

You shrugged. “I guess you’re right.”

“Atta girl. Oh, and on your way back, make sure you grab me one of those little mini cakes. I’ve been craving one since we got here.”

Rolling your eyes at the foolish girl, you proceeded to leave her side and head over to Vinnie. The moment he saw you, he practically froze. You could tell he was nervous; his awkward stance and wide eyes told it all.

Within seconds, you stood before the boy, a slight grin on your face.

“Hey, Vinnie.” You greeted, placing your arms behind your back.

“Y/n, didn’t see you there!” He laughed. “Well, I did see you there but like, I wasn’t watching you or anything…yeah, totally wasn’t watching you.”

Your smile grew wider. “Yeah, sure. So, how’ve you been?”

“Good, uh…definitely good. You?”

“Um, my classes are going well, and I just got a new place…so, can’t complain.”

“That’s dope, Y/n. Glad to hear you’re doing good.”

You nodded, looking down at your feet. “Same to you. I’m sure you’re, y’know…enjoying everything with your girlfriend.”

Vinnie looked at you with a puzzled expression, your statement taking him back a bit. To be honest, he couldn’t be surprised that you thought he’d be taken by now because he thought the same about you. However, at the same time, with the way he was acting right now, he was shocked you didn’t realize he was still head-over-heels for you.

“I don’t, um…I’m not seeing anyone.”

You grinned to yourself, trying to keep your cool as you tilted your head at him. “I’m sorry, I just thought you’d be with someone.”

“It’s fine. I definitely get it. To be honest, I thought you’d be here with someone.”

“Technically, I am.” You replied.

It was at that moment Vinnie felt his heart explode and despair run through his system. He weakly put on a happy face, shooting you a thumbs up.

“That’s g-great.”

“Yeah, Y/bff/n just was dying to come with me. She’s been begging to go to one of these parties, so I thought why not?”

“Oh,” Vinnie breathed, feeling his heart piece itself back together. “So, you’re not seeing anyone?”

You shook your head. “Not right now. I’ve been on a few dates and stuff, but no one has ever made me feel like y-”

You stopped yourself, locking your lips together to keep that last word from leaving your mouth. You didn’t know why, but something in you didn’t want you sharing your feelings with Vinnie. Maybe it was the small ounce of hurt that clung to your heart like a child from Vinnie’s infidelity. Or maybe it was the slight fear that he may not want to get back together. There were so many thoughts in your head, all speaking at once. It was so loud, that you didn’t even catch what Vinnie had said to you.

“…and-…Y/n? You listening?” He tapped you gently, bringing you out of your head.

“Sorry about that. I was in my head for a moment. What were you saying?”

“I was just saying that I’m sorry for what I did. I was just so confused on where we stood in our relationship, not saying that it justifies my actions, but instead of coming to talk to you, I went and…well, did what I did. Believe me, I never meant to hurt you, and I totally understand if you don’t forgive me.”

You sighed, “I’m not gonna lie, I didn’t know where our relationship was headed either. Honestly, I was planning to break up with you that night.”

“And I ended up giving you even more of a reason to do so.”

You both laughed before meeting each other’s eyes.

“I wish we had talked about it, y’know? Communicated and all of that suff. It would’ve saved us both a heap of heartache.” You continued. “I can’t lie, even though life has been good, it sucks not being able to share it with you.”

Vinnie smirked, taking your hands in his. “Y/n, ever since we broke up…I haven’t been able to think about anything but you. I hadn’t streamed, I barely left the house…I couldn’t do anything. I just didn’t know how to function without you. You have such a hold over me…I didn’t know how to get over you.”

“I guess this whole goodbye thing really wasn’t a good idea after all.”

“No, I think it was. I think it happened for a reason. That reason being, so we can fall in love all over again.”

At this point, you were a smiling mess and there was nothing you could do to hide it. Vinnie wasn’t any better, you could tell he was in pain by the way he hadn’t stopped showing his pearly whites. It clear to both of you now that you two were still in love, if not more than before.

“That’s so sweet, Vin.” You said. “But also, cheesy. You were always the sappy one in the relationship.”

“As if, Miss Hopeless Romantic. I’m not the one who freaks out over Valentine’s Day.”

“Mmhm, sure you don’t.”

The two of you stood there for minute in silence, your hands entangled, and your gazes planted on each other. It felt good, and it was almost as if all that hurt…that fear…it was completely gone and now replaced with passion and security.

“Y/n, I know you probably have some resentment towards me, but I love you too much to care. So, if you’re willing and there’s enough forgiveness in your heart…I wanna restart, right from the beginning.”

Without much thought or hesitation, you said, “We can restart. For sure.”

“Well, in that case…Hi, I’m Vinnie.”

You smiled as the feeling of love washed over you. To say you were happy was an understatement, you were in paradise. Life was great, and now you had your boy back to share it with.

“Nice to meet you, Vinnie. I’m Y/n.”

[bqstqnbruin]

1 and 64 on the prompt list for nolpat?? if you dont have time its totally alright !! you can also just do whatever prompt you feel like doing

definitely not simping for nolpat hours rn

1.“I thought you liked love songs!”

64. “I think your cat wants to kill me.”

ok but this is one of my favorite ones. It’s inspired by an episode of Gilmore Girl (couldn’t tell you which one exactly but it involves Max Medina) but I’ve linked the rings within the text in case I don’t describe them right :)

This isn’t violent and it’s also not the one that fixes the violence I committed in the other nolan blurb as a btw

Happy blurb weekend!

_______________________

You were sitting in silence, not talking, both of you on the couch, reading whatever books you had chosen that week. It was mundane, the ice in the ice coffees melting, the toasted bagels getting cold, but it was something the two of you had done since high school, at least monthly, as a way for you and Natalie to unwind and just relax with each other's company. 

The two of you were perfectly content with what you were doing, ignoring your phones, the screens lighting up with notifications, your concentration on the books strong enough for you to not notice.

“Who has been calling me?” Natalie asks, breaking the silence and the concentration. “Nolan?”

You lean over to see her screen. “My Nolan?” 

She shrugs, answering the call and putting it on speakerphone, her finger to her lips signaling to you to be quiet. “Hello?”

“Hey, Nat, are you with Y/N?”

You shake your head, knowing that eavesdropping on this conversation was wrong, but you couldn’t help but wonder. If it got to be too much, you could just leave, right?

“No, I’m at home, I thought she was with you,” she lies, earning a thumbs up from you.

“She’s not. Ok, good,” he sounds nervous, his voice shaking. “I need help.”

You both look confused and concerned by the tone of Nolan’s voice, the shaking in his words and his clearly uneasy breathing. “Nolan, are you ok?”

“Yeah, no, yeah,” he says, letting out a deep breath, “I just got off the phone with Y/N’s parents: they gave me their blessing to ask her to marry me.” 

Natalie screams, you covering your mouth so you don’t give away to Nolan that you’re right there. You two had talked about marriage before, but you didn’t think he was serious about it yet. And you didn’t realize until that moment that there was nothing else you wanted.

“Jeez, Nat, tryna burst my eardrum, eh?” Nolan says, Natalie mouthing, ‘I think your cat wants to kill me,’ to you, referring to the nickname you had picked up for him from his teammate.

You mouth back, ‘he does not,’ while she continues to talk to him. “Sorry, but, you’re going to propose?”

“Yeah, and I need your help planning everything because you’re her best friend and Travis is the human equivalent of a dog before obedience school.” 

The two of them start planning how Nolan was going to propose, the only detail being left out was when and where. “I’m gonna have ‘Make you feel my love’ playing before I ask her.” he tells Natalie, her looking at you to determine if you liked that or not.

You did love that song, but not for a proposal. At least not to have it playing before he asks you. You wouldn’t be paying attention to the music, so you shake your head no. “Ixnay on the ongsay,” she tells him, you rolling your eyes.

“I need you to never try to use Pig Latin again. And I thought she liked love songs like that!” 

“She does, just not for the proposal. Nol, let it be just you and her. Every other detail is good.” 

“Ok, now I’m between three rings.”

“Tell me,” she says, you jumping up and down at the prospect of him already having ideas for you.

“They’re all white gold.” You shake your head yes, Natalie relaying that message before he continues. “The first one is vintage-inspired. It has a diamond in the middle, and then it’s a latticework, a halo of diamonds around it, and three more going down each side of the band.”

You shake your head no, giving a face. You were sure it was beautiful, but it wasn’t you. “No, too much for her.”

“Got it,” he says, something being thrown in the background. “Next is much simpler; the band is almost like an infinity symbol-shaped into a ring, with diamonds lining one of the loops of it before meeting in the center for the main diamond.”

“That’s an option, but I need to hear the third,” Natalie tells him based on your facial expression.

“This one I really like,” he starts, you already getting excited. “Diamond in the center, then it’s a swirl of gemstones leading up to it.” You start shaking your head, Nolan continues, “And I can get it with any stone, so I was thinking either doing her birthstone or doing it so it alternates between hers and mine, you know, so it’s both of us.”

“Oh, my god,” you whisper, knowing it was that one, Natalie putting her hand over your mouth to stop you from making more noise, trying to tell him that he should get that ring.

Nolan lets out a long sigh. “She’s right there, isn’t she?” he asks, clearly annoyed by the antics of you and your best friend, but you knew he was smiling.

“No.”

“Put my girl on.”

She takes the phone off speaker, handing it to you as you both squeal. “Hey, babe.”

“Hey future Mrs. Patrick.” 

[eurydicees]

at the whisper of a violin

summary: momiji gives one last violin performance, just for the two of them, in which he bares his soul. a story in which tohru doesn’t understand, until she does. 

prompt: momiru for @eroshiyda ! i hope you enjoy <3 

pairings: momiji sohma/tohru honda

words: 1495

warnings: none

note: here is a spotify link to the violin piece, “none but the lonely heart” by tchaikovsky, that i listened to on a loop while writing this :) 

“Tohru!” 

Tohru turns away from the stove, catching just the sound of Momiji’s voice as he pauses at the front door to tug off his shoes. It takes only a moment before he comes into the kitchen, a bright smile on his face. 

Tohru grins at him. “Hello—” 

“Before I chicken out,” Momiji cuts in, “I promised that I would give you a private concert.” 

Tohru blinks. “Oh, Momiji, you didn’t really have to—” 

“I wanted to!” Momiji interrupts again. The excitement is bleeding into nervousness which bleeds into his voice, into the slight shake of his hands, into the grin at his lips. He hoists the violin case in his hands up, just showing that he has it. “Come on, take a break from cooking. You work too hard, Tohru.” 

Tohru glances between him and the vegetables that she had been cutting on the counter. Slices of carrots and scallions are resting in piles at the cutting board, the knife still in her hands. The miso soup in progress is simmering on the stove. “I suppose this can wait a few minutes.” 

“Great!” Momiji grins, grabbing her hand. 

He pulls her out of the kitchen and towards the table, Tohru following him with a yelp. She sits down at the table, legs folded underneath her. Momiji stands across the table from her— he sets down the violin case and pulls out the violin. 

“I got all prepared earlier,” he says, putting the violin to his shoulder. “I didn’t want to have to warm up while you were watching.” 

Tohru smiles at him, something warm coming to her cheeks. He’s more considerate than people give him credit for, she thinks. There’s something about the brightness of his smile and the energy that’s constantly running through his veins and coming out in bursts of laughter and movement that makes him seem childish, that makes him seem like he’s less than he is. Seeing him here, holding the violin, in his element, Tohru thinks that maybe she’s beginning to see through all of that. 

“What are you going to play?” she asks, rubbing her palms against her knees. 

She’s sweating from standing over the heat of the stove, and she can feel a kind of nervousness rising up in his throat. She can’t place why it comes, but Tohru has always had a good sense for people, and she can’t shake the feeling that Momiji is saying something with this performance that he can’t say out loud. 

Last time that they had talked, Momiji had said that he was going to quit playing violin, but he had promised her a concert, just between the two of them. Tohru is, with a sudden and acute awareness, terrified that this is going to be the last time that he plays violin. She doesn’t know what to do with that, with this gift— if she’s the last person to hear him play, play for real, that means he’s given up on his dream of a concert just for his family. 

She can’t let that happen. 

For the hundredth time that week, Tohru promises herself that she’s going to find a way to break the curse. This isn’t going to be Momiji’s last concert. His mother hasn’t heard him play, not yet. 

“Wish Upon A Star,” Momiji says, smiling, “just like you asked for. I’ve been practicing all week.” 

“You learned it so quickly,” Tohru says, more of a breath than a sentence. 

He shrugs, the violin hitting his chin. “I wanted to do this for you. As a thank you.” 

“A thank you for what?” she asks, frowning. 

“For being my friend,” he says, a soft smile on his face. It’s sad, though, and she can’t quite figure out why. “Are you ready?” 

Tohru nods wordlessly, and Momiji begins to play. 

She doesn’t know that she’s crying until she feels the tears drip from her cheeks to her clasped hands. She didn’t know, before this, how much music can move a person. How much it can say. 

Even in such a simple song, Tohru can hear the talent that rests in Momiji’s fingertips, she can feel the longing in the notes— the wishing for something that you can never have, the aching desire to hold it in your hands and the coldness in your palms where you know it will never lay. She can hear every emotion that she’s ever felt poured into each note.

Momiji closes his eyes while he plays, swaying back and forth slightly, his hands moving deftly across the instrument— fingers pressing down at the strings, wrist at a sharp angle, the bow of the violin falling across the strings as if it were the wind brushing through the trees. He gets lost in the music, lost in each dip and trill. 

Tohru watches with wide eyes, feeling the tears falling from her face as Momiji brings the song to its climax. He picks up speed, the bow moving quickly, his fingers flying across the strings until she can’t differentiate between ring and pinky. She watches him as he stands there, his stance strong, rooted into the ground with a kind of force that she doesn’t understand— like he’s scared that the music will give him wings and let him fly above the house and up to the sun. Like he’s afraid of the flight of sound. 

The music spills out from the violin in a kind of heartbreak, in a kind of longing, in a kind of wanting. There are no words for this, Tohru thinks. There is only sheet music. There is only song. 

She can’t put all of her thoughts together as she listens, can't string together a coherent sentence. She loses herself to the music. She lets herself fall into it, swimming among the notes, letting all of the feeling spill out of her chest and into the violin. She feels the tears falling faster, and she loses her breath as Momiji curls out one last note. 

It’s filled to the brim with longing and wanting and words that can never be said out loud.

The two of them let that last note hang in the air for a moment, let it disappear into the wind. Momiji keeps his eyes closed for that second, just drinking in the sudden silence. 

When Tohru finally brings herself to clap, Momiji opens his eyes. He turns to her with a sad smile. 

“You’re crying,” he says softly. 

Tohru wipes at her cheeks with her shirt sleeve, trying to clean herself of all sadness. She feels drained, in a way, like the song had taken everything out of her. “It was beautiful.” 

“Thank you,” he murmurs. He places the violin carefully in the case again, exhaling slowly. “I can’t continue my lessons anymore, but I’m glad I got to perform for you.” 

Tohru swallows. “Thank you, Momiji.” 

“Anytime, Tohru,” he says quietly. He chews at his lip for a moment before sitting down across from her. He busies himself with loosening the violin bow, with setting it away, with carefully strapping the violin into its case, with everything he can do but look at her. “Do you understand?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“What I’m saying.” Momiji takes a breath. “Tohru, do you know that I love you?” 

Tohru stares at him. Her cheeks are still wet. There’s a new kind of longing in the air, a new kind of song. “What?” 

Momiji doesn’t look at her, just closes the violin case and takes a breath. “You don’t have to say anything. But I’m glad you liked the song.” 

“I loved it,” Tohru says softly. 

Momiji stands up. He’s gotten taller; when did that happen? When did his eyes get so sad? “I’ll see you later, okay?” 

Tohru nods as Momiji takes his violin case and starts to leave the room. Just as he passes her, she grabs his wrist, her arm hitting the violin case. She winces at the bump, but doesn’t cry out. She just stares at the space where he had been standing, holding onto him. Momiji stills. 

“I loved it,” Tohru repeats, and Momiji makes a startled noise. “Do you understand?” 

Momiji is quiet, and Tohru takes a breath. She says, “Will you play for me again, eventually?” 

“Whatever you want,” Momiji says, his voice choked. “I’ll play whatever you want.” 

Tohru lets go of his wrist, standing up. She looks at him, searching his eyes for something, for some kind of question, some kind of answer. Carefully, she brushes a curl of hair away from his eyes. “There’s a new Mogeta movie in theatres.” 

“I’m free tomorrow,” Momiji breathes, voice catching on a new brightness, a new music. 

His eyes meet hers, and she smiles at him. She can still hear the song in her head, she can still feel the tears drying at her cheeks, she can still taste the sound of the violin in his words. “I’ll see you then.”

[suituuup]

pieces - chapter eleven

Five years ago, Chloe dropped off the face of the Earth. Beca didn’t expect to see her again dancing in a strip club, out of all places.

rated: E (drug use and emotional abuse in early chapters)

ao3 link

*

Beca woke up the next morning to the birds singing, which was odd, until she remembered she wasn’t in NYC, but in Oregon, at Chloe’s parents’. A glance at her phone told her she had slept later than she usually did, and she burrowed herself deeper beneath the covers, exhaling a sigh. 

The smell of breakfast eventually lured out of the warm cocoon, and she made a stop at the bathroom before heading downstairs. 

Chloe’s mom was cooking at the stove, and she looked over her shoulder when Beca approached. “Oh, good morning, Beca. Did you sleep well?” 

Beca wasn’t usually one to talk in the mornings, at least not before she had her morning coffee, but she mustered a smile and made an effort. “Morning. Yes, thank you.” 

“Chloe told me you drank coffee in the morning. I put a mug out for you on the table, there’s fresh coffee in the pot. You like pancakes?” She asked as she flipped one in her pan. 

Beca could tell where Chloe (or at least college Chloe) got her morning energy from, and she stifled a chuckle as she moved to pour herself a much-needed cup. “Yeah. Pancakes sound great.” She leaned against the counter, cradling her mug between her palms. “Where’s Chloe?”

“Talking with her dad out on the back porch,” Alice said, adding the freshly made pancake to the pile. She turned off the stove and wiped her hands on her apron, focusing on Beca. “We didn’t have the chance to yesterday, but Mike and I wanted to thank you from the bottom of our hearts for what you did for Chloe. Thank you really doesn’t feel like enough. I’m not sure where she’d be without you.” 

“You really don’t need to thank me. I’m just glad she’s doing better.” 

“And for taking over those payments, too. It-- it feels like too much and…” 

Beca shook her head. “Like I said to Chloe, it really is okay, Mrs. Bea-- Alice. I don’t want to flaunt my money around, but I’m more than able to spare 2000 dollars a month, and I’m happy to spend it helping people who need it, like you and Mike. So please, accept it?” She smiled softly. “I know how much you mean to Chloe, and I’d do anything for her.” 

Before Alice could reply, the door at the back of the kitchen opened and Chloe stepped inside, holding it open to let her father wheel in. She cast Beca a smile. “Hey, you. Sleep well? Mom didn’t attack you with questions, did she? I told her you needed coffee first.” 

“I behaved myself,” Alice mumbled, sticking her tongue out before going back to her pancakes. 

Beca chuckled. “She did.” 

After breakfast, Beca helped herself to a shower, before Chloe whisked her away to show her around town. They drove down the main street, and Chloe parked in front of the local high school, cutting the ignition and stepping out. . 

“I feel like you were Head Cheerleader,” Beca said as she shut the door. The smell of the ocean made her smile and breathe in deeply. It was really nice to get out of the city for a bit. 

Chloe smirked, shaking her head as they headed down the sidewalk of what looked like the main street. “Nope.” 

“Softball? You had to be some sort of athlete.” 

“Wrong again.” 

Beca hummed as she thought. “Track?” 

Chloe slipped her hands inside her jacket pockets, walking backward so she was facing Beca. “You’re looking at Oregon’s 400m State Champion for the year 2006.” 

Beca’s jaw dropped. “Seriously? How come you never told me that??” 

Chloe’s shoulders lifted in a shrug. “Never came up. I’ll show you my trophy when we get home.” She pointed across the street. “This is the cafe my friends and I went to every weekend to gossip about the boys.” 

“Gossiping about boys, huh?” Beca asked, smirking. “Who was your high school crush?” 

“This guy named Ian. He was on the swimming team.” 

Beca cut her a glance. “You guys ever dated?” 

“He asked me out once. Then he asked another girl to prom. I was heartbroken.” 

“Aw.” Beca grinned. “Did you cross off the love doodles featuring his name from your notebooks while belting out to songs from your break-up playlist?”

Chloe shoved her shoulder as Beca laughed. “Shut up. I didn’t have a break-up playlist.” 

“But you had one for songs you liked getting off to?” Beca couldn’t help but tease. “Weirdo.” 

A bright laugh burst past Chloe’s lips. “I can’t believe I burst into your shower.” 

A fond smile spread across Beca’s features at the memory. “And I can’t believe I still auditioned knowing my stalker was part of the group.” 

“I wasn’t a stalker!” Chloe cried, her jaw-dropping. She giggled. “I just… sort of ignored the boundaries.” 

“Which is what stalkers do,” Beca pointed out with another smirk. “It’s cool. I’m glad you did, in hindsight. I got to meet the people who would end up becoming my best friends for life.” 

Chloe narrowed her eyes, amusement flashing in her features. “When did you get so cheesy?” 

A groan flitted past Beca’s lips. “Ugh. Gross, right?” 

As Chloe laughed, Beca realized how much she had missed the banter. Every little piece of Chloe Beale surfacing never failed to make her smile. 

Chloe’s step faltered when they came across a baby shop, her eyes lingering on the window. 

Beca smiled, nudging Chloe’s shoulder with her own. “We can go in if you want?” 

A matching smile spread across Chloe’s features as she nodded, and they both stepped inside the medium-sized store.

“Jesus, kids need that much stuff?” Beca asked as she glanced around the various items, muttering an apology when the employee glanced at her. 

Stifling a giggle, Chloe headed to the onesie section and browsed through the rack. “Oh Bec, look,” she said, holding up a simple, white onesie that read little bean in cool lettering. The smile that lit up Chloe’s face as she looked at the item was the first one Beca had seen reach her eyes since Chloe had been back in her life and the sight of it made her heart swell.

Chloe must have felt her staring, and she glanced up curiously. “What?”

“Nothing,” she cleared her throat. “You’re just… glowing.”

“I think you should get it,” she added not to make it awkward. “It’s adorable.”

After their stop at the store, she and Chloe headed to the wharf for lunch. It was a sunny, warm spring day, and they sat on a bench in front of the sea to eat their sandwiches as Chloe shared more memories about growing up in her hometown. 

“So how did you and Sarah meet?” Chloe asked following a lull in the conversation. 

Beca finished chewing her bite and swallowed, washing it down with a sip of soda. “I used to go to the coffee shop pretty often for lunch. We would talk for a bit each time. I was clueless to her flirting, it was only when she left her number that I realized she was into me.” 

Chloe chuckled, eyeing her with a raised eyebrow. “You? Clueless to flirting? That doesn’t sound right.” 

Beca’s eyes rolled skyward as she fought back a smile. “Bite me, Beale.” 

Chloe giggled. “Sorry. She seems like a great girl, though.” 

“Yeah,” Beca breathed out, trying to ignore the way her stomach flipped. “She really is.” 

And she meant that. She cared a lot about Sarah, but ever since their talk about a month ago, she had been questioning her own commitment to their relationship, going back and forth about what she wanted. The fact that she had been so oblivious about Sarah’s needs to take the next step because she felt comfortable with where they were at was the first red flag that she wasn’t all in. 

People should feel the need to move forward after fourteen months together, right? 

Sarah was kind, funny, loving, and everything Beca imagined in a significant other, but whenever she found herself trying to picture their life down the road, two, five, ten years from now, her mind went blank. 

“You okay?” Chloe asked, her head tilted as she gazed at Beca. 

“Yeah,” Beca breathed out, shaking those thoughts out of her head and focusing back on Chloe. She cleared her throat. “What’s next on the list, Beale?” 

After buying ice-creams from her favorite shop, Chloe took her to her favorite beach, and they headed home around three, as Chloe felt like taking a nap. 

Over the next two days at her parents’, they baked, took walks in the forest or by the sea, and had movie nights with Alice and Mike. Beca made sure to give the three some family time as well, spending a couple of hours every day working on her laptop in the guest room. 

That last night in Oregon, she found Chloe on the swingset in the garden, a blanket wrapped around her shoulders. Beca approached with two hot chocolates, handing one over before lowering herself on the other swing. 

“I’ve yet to find a prettier sky than this one,” Chloe mused aloud, craning her neck to look at the starry darkness above them as she cradled her mug between her palms. 

“It’s pretty dope,” Beca agreed softly. She glanced at Chloe, and finally plucked the courage to word the thought that had been going in a loop in her mind since their first night in Newport. “Have you given some thought about moving back here?” 

She was hoping Chloe would stay with her, to be completely honest. They had just rekindled, and Beca didn’t want her to live on the other side of the country. She could also feel some sort of attachment to Bean, which sounded ridiculous as they weren’t even born yet. But she also understood that Chloe might want to be with her parents, someplace that is close to her heart.

“I don’t know yet,” Chloe admitted, clearing her throat. “I’m concerned about disrupting their lives with a newborn baby. Mom’s already got so much on her plate with taking care of dad, and I don’t know if me being around while I’m still recovering is the smartest idea, with my dad feeling so guilty. I want him to focus on his health. But I guess it would be simpler, right? For you, I mean.” 

Beca shook her head. “I told you you could stay as long as you’d like. My place is your home, and I…” she cleared her throat, shrugging as her gaze flickered back to the stars. “I like having you around.”

“I like living with you, too,” Chloe admitted, smiling softly. “And I like my therapist and my NA group.” 

And having a routine was essential for a recovering addict. 

“Then it feels like a no-brainer,” Beca concluded.

“What about Sarah?” Chloe asked after a moment. “Are you sure she’s okay with me living with you?” 

The mention of Sarah made Beca’s heart squeeze with guilt. The last few days only further confirmed how she felt. She wasn’t missing her like she was probably supposed to, even though it had been ten days since they had last seen one another, as Beca had been too busy to do anything besides working, eating and sleeping that week leading up to their trip. 

She had been sending Sarah check-in texts because she felt like she had to, not because she wanted to. 

Beca needed to sack up and be honest with Sarah, something she had been delaying because she was a coward and terrified of breaking her heart. But she knew deep down she was doing more harm than good right now by running away from how she truly felt. 

She knew deep down, that Sarah deserved someone better.  

“Yeah,” she replied absent-mindedly, swallowing, then mustering a smile. “Don’t worry about that.” 

She sent a text to Sarah later that night, asking if she could come over after they landed in NYC tomorrow night. The following morning, she and Chloe grabbed an early breakfast, as they needed to be in Portland at ten. 

“You’re welcome back here anytime, Beca,” Alice said, pulling back from the hug. 

A genuine smile spread across Beca’s features. “Thanks, Alice.” 

“Bye dad,” Chloe murmured, leaning in to hug him tightly. 

Mike closed his eyes and hugged her back. “Safe travels, Chlobear. Love you.” 

“Love you, too. So much.” She embraced her mom next, echoing the same sentiment before sliding into the passenger seat and shutting the door behind her. 

Beca slid behind the wheel and started the car, pulling out of the driveway and onto the main road as Chloe waved to her parents. 

“You okay?” She asked after a moment, glancing at Chloe briefly. 

“Yeah, I’m good,” Chloe replied with a firm nod. “Thanks for coming with me.” 

“No problem. A break from the city was pretty nice.” 

They landed in NYC a little bit after 8 pm. Beca had the cabbie drop Chloe off at her apartment, then headed to Sarah’s, riding the elevator to her floor. 

She knocked on the door and stepped back, wiping her sweaty palms over the denim of her jeans. Her stomach was in knots, and she wished she could fast-forward the next twenty minutes or so. The door swung open a few seconds later, Sarah standing on the other side. 

“Hey you,” she greeted with a small smile. 

“Hey,” Beca murmured, kissing Sarah’s cheek out of habit. “How was your day?” 

“Same old,” Sarah said as she shut the door, then moved towards the kitchen. “How was the trip? You want a beer?”

“It was nice,” Beca replied as she followed, leaning against the counter. “No thanks, I’m good.” She took a deep breath, knowing she had to do this now before she chickened out. 

“What’s up?” Sarah asked as she closed the fridge and turned around, leaning against the opposite counter.

Beca cleared her throat, nibbling on the inside of her cheek. “So, um. I’ve been thinking a lot about us moving in together and I…” Honesty. Honesty was the best policy. Rip off the band-aid. “I don’t see myself getting there.”

Sarah visibly swallowed, and she nodded slowly, glancing down at the floor for a few beats. Given her reaction, Beca could tell she had been sort of expecting it.

“I’m sorry,” Beca murmured, a lump rising in her throat. “I know I gave you false hope by saying we would figure something out, I just wasn’t sure how I felt up until recently.” She grimaced. “The last thing I want is to hurt you. But you deserve someone who can be all in.”

The tear running down Sarah’s face broke Beca’s heart. She blinked back her own, exhaling slowly. 

“Like you seem to be all in with Chloe?” Sarah asked quietly, stunning Beca into silence. 

“What?” 

Sarah’s eyes rolled towards the ceiling. “You’re oblivious to that, too?” When Beca didn’t say anything, she released a soft laugh. It was anything but humorous. “I see the way you look at her, Bec. I know the both of you living together was something that just happened because Chloe didn’t have anywhere to stay, but I can tell you like having her around. I can tell you have feelings, even if you don’t seem to realize it yet. I was hoping I was wrong, but you not hesitating on going on that trip when we hadn’t seen each other in over a week made it pretty clear that Chloe would always come first.” 

Beca’s brain was stuck on the first part. Did she really look at Chloe differently? Feelings? She cared about her, sure, but-- “That’s not—”

Sarah swiped her palm over her cheeks, nodding. “And you’re right. I deserve someone who looks at me the way you look at Chloe. Like I’m their person. Someone who loves me as much as I love them.” 

“Me ending things doesn’t have anything to do with Chloe,” Beca said softly, truly believing that. She knew the next words were going to sting, but she needed Sarah to believe it, too. “I just… don’t see this going anywhere.” She hung her head, feeling like the worst person in the world for breaking someone’s heart. “I’m sorry, Sarah.” 

“Yeah. Me, too.” Sarah cleared her throat, pinching her lips together for a moment, seemingly trying to keep a hold on her emotions. “I think you should go.” 

Beca nodded, another apology laying on the top of her tongue. She swallowed it back knowing it probably wouldn’t make Sarah feel any better, and pushed to her feet, quietly walking out of Sarah’s apartment.

[shewhowantsmouseears]

morgwing meet-up messy drabble

My year-long-fic-break has been slightly broken, but don’t expect too much. I had enough brain juice in me to write this 3 page silliness.

Still riding the high from @queenie-draws-stuff ‘s rad Morgana redesign, I decided to write a potential “how they met” deal, combining the original Fungus Amongus quotes/situation with Queenie’s Goth Rock set-up.

Additional notes now I think of them before jumping right to what is basically “mel enjoys writing simps”

The Band uses a We Will Rock You style song (been listening to this cover) to hypnotize her fans into attacking Darkwing and the gang.

Halestorm’s cover of Bad Romance is definitely suitable for attacking and flirting with Darkwing at the same time.

At one point, Darkwing gets her guitar away from her and he’s confident “Ahaha! Now that I’ve taken away your magic, you’re helpless!” And Morgana smiles... then bursts into cackles. “Oh, Dark Darling... my guitar isn’t the source of my power. It’s merely a conduit.” (”a... a what”) “In other words...” her hands and eyes glow. “It’s time for the encore, baby.”

OKAY TIME FOR THE SHORT WRITTEN THING ITSELF

In hindsight, this wasn’t the best plan, but in his defense, it worked all the time on a TV show he’d watched as a child. Darkwing paused to think about that train of logic, and pondered if perhaps he should stop trying to plan his investigations that way and instead follow his own instincts next time.

 “OWWWWW BONES DO NOT BEND THAT WAY!”

 If there was a next time. He had assumed the whole goth rock mutant monster image was just that, an image. The guy with two heads, the girl with one eye, the behemoth of a drummer? All of it was just costumes and acting! So when announced his presence in his typical overly dramatic fashion, he assumed they would cower in fear before offering their assistance. Instead, they had jumped him and were now holding his arms behind his back and threatening to tie his limbs into knots. As he continued to squirm in place, he once more tried to plead his innocence.

 “I’m here to HELP!” He cried out, nervously noticing the two-headed terror cracking his knuckles while the one-eyed wonder was pulling out various sharp instruments from her purse, and they definitely weren’t the musical kind. “I was just looking for clues! You know those robberies that have been happening around here, right?! There’s a connection between them and your band!”

 “And now we’re about to disconnect your head from your neck!” Said the left head, and the right headed nodded vigorously.

 Darkwing winced, as the others advanced on him, the grip on his arms tightening. If this was his last day on earth, he really wished his last words to Gosalyn hadn’t been “Remember to run the dishwasher after homework.” He closed his eyes, his brain struggling to think of how to get him out of this sticky situation…

 “HEY!” A sharp - yet familiar – voice broke through the scene. “What’s going on here?! We do not treat our fans this way! Put him down!”

 It took less than a second for Darkwing to recognize the voice – this was the singer of the band, after all. When Gosalyn had showed him the link to her new favorite indie band, Darkwing had taken a compulsory listen without paying attention to the visuals, as he was busy trying to pin down the strange case of robberies where the victims couldn’t remember being robbed at all. The singer was definitely talented, a strong but sultry voice that Darkwing certainly wouldn’t have minded listening to on a loop. But it’d been also terribly distracting, so he hadn’t tried to give the music video any attention. Once again, this proved to have been not the best idea in hindsight.

 Because then he would have prepared for the absolute bombshell that walked through the curtains.

 Darkwing opened one eye to see his savior, and then both eyes were not only open, but they were also quite wide in shock. The woman in question was a leggy stunner, her black and white hair parted over one side and trailing down her eerily pale feathers like a shadowy walk lit by moonlit. Sharp green eyes pierced right through his heart, analyzing him as he stood there in a slack-jawed stupor. She adjusted her blood-red guitar over her back, the crimson and black spider-web outfit giving him the feeling he’d be the fly that eagerly walked into this parlor any day. She rested one hand on her hip, and snapped her fingers – even her nails were unique – long, sharp, yellow, and deadly.

 Darkwing had no more time to realize he had a type and she was it when he was let go and dropped to the floor. As he scrambled to get up and dust himself off, the one-eyed woman huffed. “We caught this weirdo sneaking around here, Morgana.”

 Morgana held up a hand, signaling for silence. “I got this, Cornea.” She looked Darkwing up and down once more before smiling in amusement. “I believe this is where you introduce yourself.” She offered her hand to shake. “Nice to meet you, mister…?”

 “D-Dingwing Dork.”  Darkwing sputtered, his palm feeling incredibly sweaty in her delicate hand. He was quick to realize his mistake, yelped, and fumbled with his hands and hat as he tried to make his brain calm down. “DARK! Darkwing Duck! Dark-Darkwing Duck.” After a hard throat clear, he tried to pretend he hadn’t made an absolute fool of himself several times, tipping his hat politely, doing a gentlemanly bow, and ignoring the various eyerolls of the other band-mates. “At your service.”

 “What an unusual name,” Morgana commented, lightly tilting his beak up with one of her fingers, closing the gap between them for a few but very, very personal seconds. “But then you appear to be very unusual… I like that.” When she pulled away, it was a sheer miracle Darkwing didn’t fall forward, though he certainly leaned in enough to make it a close call. “We were just wrapping up rehearsal. We want to close up shop early, what with all those midnight robberies going on.”

 Darkwing stopped for a second, befuddled. “Hang on. How did you know they were midnight robberies?” He was fairly certain that was something the press hadn’t leaked, and he’d only just figured out the timeline a day before.

 Morgana froze in place – eyes quickly shooting to her fellow players – before rolling her shoulders, readjusting her guitar so that it slid back into her arms. “I… deduced it.”

 Maybe if Launchpad and Gosalyn were there – the former to ask more questions, the latter to smack some sense into him – Darkwing would have taken greater notice of that lengthy pause. Instead? She deduced it, he thought, his heart doing cartwheels. My kinda woman. Despite his clear problematic infatuation, his brain did have enough cells left to ask another important question. “Isn’t it kind of… peculiar… to hold a rehearsal this late?”

 Morgana plucked a few notes off her guitar, walking back onto the front of the stage, the curtains now perfectly parted to show the moon shining down from the ceiling – the venue, such as it was, had certainly seen better days. But now the various holes above seemed to be an improvement rather than something that needed fixing. “I enjoy the night,” she answered, and then playfully added, “Besides, the sun is so harsh on my skin.”

 “You know…” Darkwing casually strolled up to Morgana’s side, his previous predicament forgotten already, “I’m something of a creature of the night myself.” He wiggled his eyebrows.

 Morgana chuckled quietly. “I bet we have a lot in common, Darkwing. In fact…” She lightly nudged the guitar’s neck into Darkwing’s actual neck, enjoying the audible tiny ‘eep’ his flustered mouth made. “I bet we could make beautiful music together.”

[ourloveisforthelovely]

On the Mend. Part 3

Harry Potter AU 

Link to Part 2

Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader 

Rating: M- later chapters

Song at the beginning: “Lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off” by Panic! At the Disco

_____

I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck Than any boy you'll ever meet, sweetie, you had me

Girl, I was it, look past the sweat, a better love deserving of Exchanging body heat in the passenger seat? No, no, no, you know it will always just be me

You weren't sure how far you had been walking when you stopped. Stopping, you looked around to try and figure out just where you had gone to. You were at least a mile from home and at the moment that was okay. Upon returning home you would have to face Regulus. There was no way around it.

The sensible side of your brain told you that this was for the best if not for yourself then for Renee. She deserved to have Regulus in her life and whether you wanted to admit it or not so did you. You still loved him even though he hurt you more than you cared to admit.

He was trying to apologize and say that he was wrong...that has to count for something.

The voice in your heart was a lot different than the one in your brain that wanted Regulus’ balls in a jar. You kept muttering your daughter’s name and “I’m a better person” over and over. Maybe Regulus meant it when he said had he known that you were pregnant that he would have said no to his parents. It wasn’t like you could hop in a time machine and go find out.

The question that existed now was would you ever be able to trust him? Your sensible side said, “Give the poor boy a chance; he almost cried. Regulus Black doesn’t cry.”

“This is going to be messy.”

You muttered before turning and heading back in the direction of home. At least you had Remus and Sirius in your corner. They wouldn’t let anything horrible happen to you, Sirius especially. He was the one that wanted to go after his brother when you told him that you were pregnant to begin with and shake his brother until the boy came to his senses.

Walking back into the house, Remus looked up from the book that he was reading. His expression went from blissfully relaxed to worried brother as he stood up.

“Are you alright? We were worried about you.”

You nodded, taking off your coat.

“Sorry, I had to get some air.”

Remus nodded, pulling you into a hug.

“If he starts shit, I will politely rip his lungs out at the full moon. All that you have to do is ask.”

You leaned back and met Remus’ gentle eyes. The two of you instantly burst into fits of giggles.

“I’ll keep that in mind. We have an order meeting, right?”

Remus nodded before sitting back down and returning to his book. He was beginning to wonder why they were even called meetings anymore. The order had nearly been depleted. Tonight it was just going to be Dorcas, Marlene, Dumbledore, and (making a rare appearance) Minerva McGonagall.

“Everyone should be here soon.”

You took a breath before turning and going to the sitting room. Stopping in the doorway, you couldn’t help but smile seeing Regulus sitting on the floor with Renee. The little girl had torn out all of the pieces of her toy kitchen that Remus had bought her for her birthday and was handing Regulus random plastic dishes and food items. He had a small rare smile on his face as he neatly put everything in little stacks.

Renee’s attention had drifted over to you before eagerly holding her hands up and squealing “mama.” Regulus’ head snapped in your direction before quickly standing up.

“I’ll just take her so you two can talk.”

Sirius, who you hadn’t even noticed was in the room, said before picking Renee up and leaving the room. The last thing that he really wanted was for either Renee or himself to witness this conversation.

“Can we talk? Please?”

Regulus asked. He kept his tone smooth and gentle. Regulus knew that if he talked the least bit harshly, he would get nowhere.

You, meanwhile, started muttering Renee’s name over and over in your mind. This had to be for your daughter. You had to put the pain of the break up, the pain of reading Regulus’ and fruit salad lady’s wedding announcement in the Daily Prophet, and any other hurt that affected you on the back burner.

“Sure, come upstairs with me. I don’t want anyone listening.”

Regulus followed you up the stairs into what had to be your bedroom.

“Close the door.”

You said, softly before taking your wand out and putting a silencing charm on the room. Regulus waited until you turned back to him to speak.

“Y/n, what do I have to do? I’ve apologized. I was an ignorant teenager...a stupid git of a teenager. Better yet...here”

Regulus reached into the pocket of his suit jacket and produced a folded up sheet of paper. You frowned and took it from him.

“What’s this?”

“The proof that you need that I’m a free man.”

You unfolded the paper that was clearly his divorce decree from Ambrosia. Blinking a few times you folded the paper up and handed it back to him.

“Congratulations, I guess?”

Regulus didn’t expect much of a reaction to that so he decided to go with plan B.

“You were right. I was a coward for not standing up to them. That is going to change. I’ve already asked mother to meet us for lunch tomorrow. I want you to go with me because I’m telling her everything. If she wants to blast me off of the family tapestry then I am fine with it. You know my father is dead, right?”

You nodded, unsure of how to react to what Regulus said. The fact that he was willing to take the risk of being burnt off of the Black family tapestry said a lot! If he didn’t care, you doubted he would be willing to tell Walburga everything.

“Yeah, I heard about that. You do realize that this isn’t going to end well for you.”

Regulus shrugged as he stepped closer to you. His stormy eyes were locked on yours looking for any sign that you wanted him to stop.

“It doesn’t matter.”

He reached down and took your hand in his. You didn’t pull away this time. Instead, you stood enjoying the feeling of his skin on yours as you had earlier.

Regulus’ eyes rolled back up from your joined hands.

“All that matters is this...you, me, and our baby. You can trust me. I’m not going anywhere.”

Regulus tilted your face up to his before leaning down and kissing you softly.

“All that I am asking for is a chance...a second chance. This time there won’t be any hiding.”

Regulus was relieved when you didn’t kick him in the shins. You stood with your hand still wrapped around his.

“Reggie, I…”

Regulus smiled.

“Did I tell you that you are the only one that I let call me that? I’ve missed hearing it. What do I have to do?”

You were silent for a few moments.

“That was an honest apology. Believe it or not, I could always tell when you were lying. That wasn’t a lie. I never really told anyone this and I don’t think that I even wanted to admit it to myself...I knew that you didn’t want to marry her. I could see it in your eyes.”

Regulus nodded. Not wanting to marry Ambrosia was putting things lightly. His father almost had to drag him out of the house. Regulus had spent the whole morning sobbing like a baby after drinking the whole previous night away. Throughout the wedding, Ambrosia was lucky that Regulus didn’t throw up on her. He instead spent the reception throwing up in the bushes with Evan shaking his head like a disapproving mother bird.

“No, I didn’t want to. You should have seen the spoiled brat that I was the whole time. May I ask you a question?”

“Sure.”

You replied, softly. You were nervous about what was about to come out of his mouth. What if it was a question that you didn’t want to face? Would you be able to answer it? You weren’t sure.

Regulus frowned.

“Did you know that you were pregnant when we broke up?”

You motioned to the bed. The two of you should probably sit down for this conversation.

“No, I didn’t know then. I didn’t find out until a few weeks after. I didn’t tell anyone for a while either...like 5 months later…it was after James and Lily died.”

Regulus’ hand wrapped around yours.

“I wanted to come to you after I heard they were killed. Voldemort had me out of the country at that particular time. I was left out of the loop on a lot of things at that particular time. Between you and me, I thought that prophecy was a bunch of crap. Hell, everything at that particular time was a bunch of crap.”

“I’m relieved to hear that come out of your mouth. You have no idea how much I worried anytime you went on some mission. Regulus, I want to love you again but it's going to take some time.”

Regulus slid off of the bed to kneel in front of you. His hand reached up to cup your cheek.

“I’ll give you anything that you want. I’m not kidding about going to face my mother tomorrow. I want you to come with me to see it. It's going to be a shit show but it will be well worth it. Would it be obnoxious to ask for a kiss?”

Both of you smiled at that question. It was the question that totally set you off before. Now, it was different.

You still had your reservations about renewing the relationship but Regulus’ genuine demeanor was soothing.

“I think that would be alright.”

You said before leaning down and kissing Regulus softly. He didn’t move to deepen the kiss or make you feel like you had to do more other than a closed mouth kiss. That didn’t mean that Regulus didn’t want to wrap his arms around you to show the passion that he felt for you. That would take time and it didn’t matter how much Regulus didn’t want to wait...it was time to be patient. He had to be the man that you needed.

A knock on the door made Regulus and yourself pull apart quickly. You quickly took the silencing charm off of the room.

“Yes?”

You called out. Sirius’ voice came from the other side.

“The meeting is starting. I’m sorry to interrupt whatever is going on in there.”

Regulus gave you an annoyed expression before getting up and opening the door. Sirius stood with a worried expression on his face that quickly turned to relief.

“Oh thank Merlin. You both have your clothes on.”

Sirius was afraid that he was going to come upstairs and find Regulus and yourself snogging. It wasn’t that he didn’t expect it to happen eventually but it didn’t need to happen too quickly. The last thing that Sirius wanted was for you to go through another hell-like breakup. He didn’t mind picking up the pieces because that’s what best friends did for one another. Sirius didn’t want to see you or Regulus, for that matter, hurt.

“Just what did you think that we were doing?”

Regulus questioned. Sirius smirked.

“Well...put 2 and 2 together would you?”

You stood up quickly.

“You don’t have to worry about that, Sirius.”

Sirius frowned.

“So, you two aren’t getting back together.”

You fought the urge to chuckle at the expression of sadness on Sirius’ face. It was as if Sirius was some child wanting to make sure his parents were good after a fight.

“Yes, we are getting back together but we aren’t doing anything too quickly.”

Sirius looked relieved. This was probably the most mature and safe way to handle the situation. Granted, Sirius never did anything slow or safe.

“Cool. Slow is good.”

The moment that you walked into the dining room with Regulus behind you, Dorcas immediately looked panicked.

“Why is Regulus here? I think he came to the wrong meeting with the wrong bunch of people.”

Regulus rolled his eyes as Dumbledore came in.

“Ms. Meadowes, Regulus is on our side now.”

Dorcas didn’t look the least bit comfortable having a former death eater in the same room as her. She wrapped her arms around Renee, who was sitting on her lap playing with her necklace. Renee turned her attention to Regulus and yourself.

“Mama, dada!”

Dorcas looked down at the baby before her dark eyes rolled up to your face.

“No! I thought that she was Sirius’.”

Dorcas looked down at the baby on her lap before gawking back up at Regulus. How had she not seen it? Renee resembled her father too much for comfort. Renee had his eyes, the same dark curls, and that same haughty expression that both Regulus and Sirius wore so well.

Sirius, meanwhile, looked disturbed.

“What? I don’t think that I would be calling myself her uncle if I was her father? What is this some fucked up version of Hamlet?”

Regulus went over to Dorcas and took Renee from her with a scowl on his face.

“Now we know the speed of stupid.”

He commented. Dorcas was out of her chair with her wand out ready to hex the boy in front of her. Regulus smirked.

“You’re really going to hex me with my daughter in my arms? Do you really want to go there?”

You quickly wedged yourself between the two.

“Dorcas, no. Regulus, please.”

Dorcas sat back down as you followed Regulus back to the empty seats across the table.

“When did this happen? You two as a couple...I thought that you were married to that Parkinson girl?”

You sighed, the last thing that you really wanted to do was tell everyone about what had happened in your life.

“He was.”

“That didn’t mean that I wanted to be. We’re divorced now.”

Regulus clarified. Dorcas was still frowning.

“So you knock up Y/n...I’m confused.”

You knew that Dorcas was about to go into protective best-friend mode.

“Dorcas, do you remember that day that you caught him staring at me?”

Dorcas’ mouth dropped.

“So you two have been having some affair that long?”

“Dorcas, they split up because our mother forced the arranged marriage with Ambrosia. Y/n was pregnant then. We, as in Remus, Y/n, and myself decided to keep the truth to ourselves because well...it was a fucked up situation. Now, Regulus is in on the know and they are working on their problems. Did I sum it up?”

Sirius questioned. You nodded as Sirius went back to the shot of whiskey in front of him as Dorcas put a hand over her face.

“Oh my god, it all makes sense! This explains that horrible depression that you went through before you had Renee. How did I not see it?”

“We kept things secret because of his family.”

You supplied. Dorcas was quiet for a moment. This was the last thing that she ever expected to happen. She thought that when she told you to stay away from Regulus you would actually listen...not run off and have a baby with him.

“Well, what about now? I mean, isn’t your mother still alive?”

Regulus nodded.

“I’m telling her tomorrow and she will either have to accept it or not. It's simple.”

Dorcas sat looking between Regulus and yourself for a few moments.

“Nothing with your pureblood Voldemort supporting families is simple.”

Had Regulus not been holding his daughter, he would have hexed Dorcas. He was thankful that Renee was trying to go to sleep against his chest. If he had not been holding her, Dorcas Meadowes would be hurting.

“You’ve got to get control on your temper. Things with Y/n is tense enough as it is. If you go hexing her stupid friend, you might as well kiss having your woman goodbye.”

Regulus thought before swallowing his rage.

“Opinions are like assholes, Meadowes.”

Remus has sat quietly observing the whole situation. He decided it was time to change the topic before things went way out of hand.

“So Dorcas, I heard that you were seeing Anthony Harwood.”

Regulus’ eyes flickered up hearing Anthony’s name. That was the little punk in Hufflepuff that followed you around like some lovesick puppy. It was only after Regulus hexed him a few time in a dark hallway did Anthony get the picture to fuck off and leave the Slytherin’s lover alone.

Dorcas rolled her eyes.

“I am. He was supposed to come but he didn’t show up.”

Regulus smirked.

“Well, it is dark outside. Maybe he thinks he’s asleep and is lost somewhere?”

Dorcas’ eyes turned to Regulus.

“You’re still an asshole, I see.”

“And I thought that you were a lesbian?”

Dorcas jumped up.

“I am bisexual you little shit!”

Renee grinned.

“Shit!”

She squealed happily before clapping her little hands. Sirius almost snorted whiskey out of his nose while Regulus blinked down at his daughter. You quickly jumped up.

“Okay, that is enough! Renee knows enough bad words for this week. Reggie, we need to get her in bed.”

The next afternoon, you followed Regulus down a street crowded with muggles. Your hand was locked in his as he held Renee in his other arm.

“I’m surprised that your mother agreed to meet you at a muggle place.”

Regulus gave you a small grin.

“What mother doesn’t know won’t hurt her. She won’t be as inclined to throw such a tantrum with people all around her.”

The moment that the two of you stepped into the restaurant your eyes immediately met Walburga who was seated by none other than freaking Ambrosia Parkinson. Both women’s mouths dropped the moment that they saw you with Regulus and the baby in his arms.

Regulus, meanwhile, was muttering “fuck” under his breath. The last thing that he expected was for Ambrosia to be there. When he spoke to Walburga the day before, Regulus made it clear that he wanted to see his mother only.

“Regulus, what is going on?”

Walburga snapped. Regulus tightened his hold on both your hand and Renee.

“Mum, I’m sure that you remember Y/n Potter. She is the woman that I am in love with and this is our daughter, Renee.”

To be continued….

______

@fairywriter-oracle

@amelie-black

@swinginsoulbailiffrascal

@velveteencurls

@sunles

@realgaytrash

@brokencasbutt67-writer

@authoressskr

@fandom-trash-worth-it

@summer-novak

@li0nh34rt

@tas898

@shaylybaby2032

@untoldshortsofthefandoms

@sprnaturallover

@maggioli-m

@marichromatic

@shitfaceddaniel

@knight-of-gleefulness

@stuckinsaudi1

@shadows-and-padlocked-hearts

@emiwrites3reads

@wontlookaway

@mycuddlycorner

[puppy-phum]

2020 – a (content creator) year in review

I decided to make this into a mix of these two games I was (kinda?) tagged into so thank you for @leonzhng and @tiesanjiao ♥ I hope you don’t mind me doing it like this ^^ all the questions were just so interesting that I wanted to try!

(bc of the amount of questions, I’m placing them under a cut so that I don’t flood anyone’s dash) 

Me

(this is the 2020 year in review that hanyi tagged me to ♥ sorry am so late!)

Top 5 Movies you saw this year

wow tbh I didn’t watch many movies this year as I realized yesterday when I was thinking about this for certain reasons. Or at least I feel like I didn’t watch that many? Nothing really stuck with me it seems.

Because of this, I will only mention two: Parasite and The Old Guard. Those were both wonderful in their own ways and I’m very happy I got to watch them both ^^

Top 5 TV shows you watched this year

this one is difficult bc I watched so many (and forgot even more?) but:

The Lost Tomb Reboot (my introduction to DMBJ. this drama stole my heart and helped me through the tough autumn semester!) 

Joy of Life (it’s nuts that this happened during 2020? it feels like it was ages ago)

Kingdom (such a positive surprise and I really hope we get more of this :o I really recommend!)

Detective L (easy, nice aesthetics, amazing costumes. Bai Yu was a delight as Luo Fei)

Sand Sea (I am still baffled by how much I loved this bc I had so many doubts? am happy I did tho)

Bonus: Guardian (bc it has come to stay and the rewatch has been so emotional but so rewarding)

Top 5 songs of 2020

this is a tough one too bc I’ve heard so much new music during 2020 but I will try to put it simply:

Black Swan by BTS (I absolutely adore this song. I listened to it on repeat when it came out at the beginning of the year, I have cried for it a ton, I enjoy every stage I see for it and it’s just a masterpiece. it has also helped a bit with my writing struggles that I’ve felt creeping up on me lately)

Always by By The Coast (an amazing song that always leaves me in my feels. inspires me a lot all the time)

Love me or Leave me by DAY6 (this whole album was a masterpiece and I listened to it on loop for like. two weeks? this was my favorite song on it even if I adored the rest too, especially Zombie)

all of my life by Park Won (listened to this a lot in relation to my xicheng and the wedding I finally got to write for them ;; that’s one good thing that came out of this year tbh)

雨人 by 刘畅 (Liu Chang) (with the Reboot’s ending song, this one is my favorite on that ost. I love Liu Chang’s voice, I loved Liu Sang as a character and as I said, I loved Reboot as a drama. I get super emotional about this ost so I think it defined this year a lot for me)

Top 5 books you read in 2020  

All For The Game -trilogy (listened to these as audiobooks but that counts right?)

The Song of Achilles (as an audiobook too and really adored the reader’s voice)

The Smoke Thieves -series (I really just binge read the two first books in this series and am so excited for the next one!)

Call Down The Hawk (love love love)

Guardian novel (am not very into these novels usually but I was positively surprised this time? it was so cool to finally get the original story and compare it with the drama version)

5 positive things that happened in 2020

joined mdzsnet and met all the amazing ppl there and got to become part of this loving community and :’) I’m so thankful, it’s been a joy

learned more about editing? or started doing it regularly. I still can’t do shit but am having fun learning more all the time and I really hope that maybe the upcoming year I can switch to PS and try out giffing?

went to Halsey’s concert! it was in february so a bit before all the hassle with covid happened over here ;; it was super cool and so nice and I just. I love Halsey

fell into the DMBJ hellhole which am very much enjoying. it’s a great universe and the story is so good and the dramas have been so fun to watch and. it feels like a good continuation to The Untamed somehow haha (also brought me a new friend! you’re amazing ashen!! ♥)

started therapy and it’s been... a journey. but towards something better I think? it’s something I would’ve needed ages ago but it’s better late than never I suppose

My Creations

(this is the other part where ali was being super sweet and mentioned me ♥ thank you for being so awesome!)

1. first creation and most recent creation of 2020: wow it’s been a while since I’ve looked at this horrible creation but here ya go jkdhgk [x]. I’ve come a long way from this (and my xicheng has come a long way from this too). most recent one is this xiaoge edit that I absolutely adore [x]. 

2. one of your favorite creations from 2020: this wwx edit that was part of my agust d2 edit series [x]. I loved to give him blue instead of his typical red. 

3. a new style you tried this year and a gifset edit that uses it: this [x] wwx edit which I don’t know if I like or not but I was playing around with the font and all the effects instead of just normal screenshots + coloring. also I just adore the quote. 

4. a creation to be proud of: I could mention that xiaoge here but in addition, I will also say this wu xie edit for reboot [x]. I managed to capture my vision so well, I was surprised. for cql, this songxiao edit [x]. I loved how it turned out in the end. 

5. a creation that took forever: this wangxian edit [x]. like I’ve said several times, I lost sleep bc of it. I just kept struggling with the third pic and how to place the text there D: 

6. your creation from 2020 that received the most notes: this lwj/wangxian edit [x]. I had many ideas for this edit when I first started making it and I never managed to capture my vision in the way I first intended... the pictures I was supposed to use just never fit quite right sigh. I dunno why it was this one that gained all the notes in the end bc I personally think I have better ones too but am still thankful :’D 

7. a creation you think deserved more notes: as said, dmbj fandom on tumblr is very small so I really want to say the two already mentioned ones (wu xie and xiaoge) and then my pingxie edits [x] [x]. also these wwx edits which I personally am very happy about [x] [x]. and from my agust d2 series, this yun bros one [x].

8. a new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it: really just dmbj this year and I’ve already linked all of my creations for that :’D tho I have plans for another pingxie edit and a liu sang edit! oh and maybe I could mention guardian here with this shen wei [x]. I had so much fun while making it (also the quote just haunted me relentlessly until I gave it a moment). 

9. a creation you made that breaks your heart: this must be my easter islanders (lwj and jc) edit [x] that just. awoke many thoughts in me? I’m going to put a link to the version where you can read my ramblings underneath :’D 

10. a ‘simple’ creation that you really love: my creation for the creator (gif?) challenge that was going around! [x] it was simple and nice to do and I loved the result. also, it was nice to work with jl for a change :’) 

11. a favorite creation created by someone else: oh wow ok so this is going to be rough bc I have so many favorites ;; you can look at this post here [x] to see more! 

but to love my two taggers am going to say these [x / x] [x] [x] [x] [x] by hanyi (I always love your edits, the colors you choose, the thoughts you put into them (and your humor too!). there are so many cool things you’ve done that I just stay in awe of! I adore all of it ;; ♥) and these [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] by ali (I love all of your gifsets so much, they have such pretty colors and such good scenes, and I am thankful every day that you make all the amazing dmbj content, pls never stop ;; I should go through all of your creations properly one day! I noticed you have sand sea stuff too and let me scream?) ^^ ♥

12. your favorite content creators and blogs that you appreciate: this is going to be a huge list and I’ve already made my love heard for some but no hurt in doing it again so @i-am-just-a-kiddo @ashenwren @tiesanjiao @kholran @lzswy @englishbunnyrocks @leonzhng @aheartfullofjolllly @yibobibo @inkblue-black @cross-d-a @bloody-bee-tea @fytheuntamed @mdzsnet @lifegoesmon @creeds-eagle @underaswift-sunrise @sarawatsaraleo @lan-xichens @mylastbraincql @wangxianbunnydoodles @manhasetardis @distantsnows @ohsehuns @minmoyu @linglynz @highwarlockkareena @yiqiie @aowyn @alienwlw @wangxiians @kingbadcat @sassyassassy @tytangfei @lanzhannnn @skzmxtp @leoyunxi @yoonqiful @softjeon @rapbabenamjoon @ronan-adam @miyakuli @pavusdorian @arsuf @brolinskeep @gawincaskeyy and so many others! (sorry for all the random ppl on this list that I’ve never even talked to ^^’ just know that you make my dash a wonderful place! ♥) 

I won’t tag anyone separately here but everyone who’s already been tagged or sees this is free to do this (or link me posts if you’ve done these already!) ♥ have a nice day everyone! 

[leejungchans]

hi carat anon <333 sorry this took so long whejjws but here’s the playlist i made for some of my recent and all-time favourites :3 apologies in advance if you’ve already heard almost of them 🤧 i feel like my music taste is super basic ;;;;;;

recent favourites !!

dreamers (ateez; super fun summer song!!)

rose (d.o; honestly his whole album is chef’s kiss but boy is rose making me wanna write a fic based on it ;-;)

dive into you (nct dream; it’s so cute omg 🤧)

hello (joy; her vocals >>> this never fails to put me in a good mood)

mixtape : oh (stray kids; the song is so soft pls ;;)

anti-romantic (txt; god tier song)

favorite crime (olivia rodrigo; the harmonies towards the end are just so angelic)

brutal (olivia rodrigo; to me this gets better with each listen and i related to the lyrics a lot!!)

drink it (the boyz; this song makes me feel powerful ahsjjws 12/10 would recommend when powerwalking down the street)

lose (niki; the lyrics and vocals are so pretty and almost poetic imo ;;;)

play with fire (sam tinnesz; ever since hyunjin’s dance video i’ve been listening to this on loop)

get loud (twice; i think i was living under a rock bc i just started listening to this and i love it 🤧)

hollywood’s bleeding (post malone; don’t look at me look at chan 👉🧍🏻)

step on up (ariana grande; started listening to this after seeing an edit of chan on twt with this as the bgm, in conclusion every decision i make is bc of him 🧍🏻‍♀️ also highly recommend watching the edit bc 👁👁 i’ll see if i can find it and link it!!)

special shout-out: anyone (svt; no i will not shut up about anyone chan bark bark bark)

all-time favourites !!

eight (iu; this song oh my gosh 🥺 it just makes me so happy and hopeful ;;;;)

blue moon (btob; so good!!!! i’m so glad they performed this on kingdom bc otherwise i wouldn’t have known this song ;-;)

you were beautiful & congratulations (day 6; the vocals in these >>>)

we lost the summer (txt; such a calming song ;;;; and the meaning of the lyrics make me soft and somewhat bittersweet)

doremi (svt; gosh i just love how all three of their voices go so well together 🥺 lee chan main vocal so true)

black mirror (oneus; the vibes in this are so ✨ ahsjhas sorry i don’t know much about music terminology so my descriptions are very lacklustre </3)

wave (ateez; HAKUNA MATATA YAH)

un village (baekhyun; iconic, his vocals are just unbeatable)

hello (chen; i usually listen to this when i write bittersweet fluff/angst ;;;; i cried the first time listening to this)

gold rush & champagne problems (taylor swift; i just love these songs so much ;;;)

exile (taylor swift; the harmonies are beautiful)

finally // beautiful stranger (halsey; i don’t think i’ve ever been in love before but this makes me wanna be ahjshwjs)

afterglow (taylor swift; i related a lot to some of the lyrics and the vocals are so pretty in this!!)

24h (svt; one of my favourite songs from them!!)

fallin’ flower (svt; another favourite!! the lyrics are just 🥺🥺)

blueprint (stray kids; such a cute and positive song ;;;)

oohhhh also i don’t think i’ve asked this but aside from svt, what other groups/soloists do you like anon? :33

and if you’re comfy with answering these, here are some questions just to get to know you more and to exchange funny stories (if any 🤪) 1) have you ever gotten lost in a foreign country? // 2) what is one embarrassing/awkward memory that’s stuck with you? // 3) what’s your favourite subject at school? // 4) do you have any pets? // 5) any random talents?

for me 1) i have 😵‍💫 i was in dublin for a study tour and i stayed with a local family and got lost multiple times when trying to get home 😭 // 2) i have so many bc i’m a strugglebus but the kids i was teaching last week joked about bringing me to a deserted island so i could work for them 🧍🏻‍♀️ that was pretty embarrassing ahsjhwjs // 3) mine’s probably english!! // 4) i used to have a few fishes and turtles but they are sadly not here with us anymore ;;; // 5) i was bored one day so i taught myself to recite the alphabet backwards 🧍🏻‍♀️

[kaimelia]

Paper Rings (Ch. 2)

hi everyone! thank you for all the support on the first chapter, I was really surprised by it! it really means a lot to receive notes and likes and messages, so thank you so much! I hope you enjoy this chapter!!

-----------------

“Thank you,” Amelia whispered, taking the hand Link was holding out for her. He closed the car door behind her, and their hands fell away from each other as they walked toward the entrance of the restaurant. Once they walked up the stairs, he held open the door and followed behind her into the crowded waiting room. Link led her to the host, giving his name and turning back to her. “Lincoln?” She asked, following as the host led them to a table. “Is that where the nickname ‘Link’ comes from?”

“Mhm, Atticus Lincoln. It’s always felt too official for me, so I go by Link.” He pulled out her chair, sitting down across from her. “What comes after Amelia?”

“Shepherd.”

“Doctor Amelia Shepherd, very official.” She looked up from the menu. “What, it was on your profile. You’re a fancy neurosurgeon,” he stated, setting down his menu.

“And your profile didn’t have a job on it. I’m slightly concerned you’re a hitman or something.” He grinned.

“I’m the team doctor for the Mariners. And, next week I’m starting part-time at a hospital here.” Her eyes widened at his words and she laughed softly. “Did I say something funny?”

“No, it’s just that when I joined tinder, I kept talking about how I’d finally be dating someone who’s not a doctor. Of course, I’d end up with probably the only other doctor on the app.”  The waitress walked over to their table and Link sat up in his seat, placing the menu down.

“What can I get for you two today?” They gave the waitress their orders, and Amelia smiled when Link told her they’d pass on the wine.

“You remembered,” she muttered after the waitress had walked away.

“Hm?”

“You remembered that I don’t drink. I thought there was going to be some awkward conversation about it when we ordered.” His hands clasped together silently, and he smiled.

“Of course, why wouldn’t I?” Her mind went to all of the times Owen had left bottles of wine around the house, an empty beer bottle on the coffee table, or his half-finished drink in the kitchen. “You okay?”

“Yeah, sorry. Just thinking. What hospital are you going to be working at?”

“Grey-Sloan Memorial, where do you work?” Amelia stared at him for a moment in disbelief, leaning forward across the table.

“Grey-Sloan Memorial, are you sure you aren’t stalking me? This is a little creepy, you didn’t have a job on your profile, and now you’re a doctor at the hospital I work at.”

“In all fairness, you asked me where I was working first,” he retorted, sitting back in his seat. “So, I guess I’ll be seeing you around.”

“What do you do, sports medicine?”

“Orthopedic surgeon. My old student, Nico Kim, is the head of orthopedic surgery. It’ll be weird for him to be my boss, but I can’t complain.” She shook her head comically and paused. “You keep laughing at me. What is happening?”

“This just feels crazy.”

-----------------

“I grew up here. And I moved to LA for a while, and worked in a bike shop for a few years.” Amelia looked up at him as they walked down the street, her arm looped through his.

“Are you serious? I worked in LA for a few years. Why’d you come back to Seattle?”

“The Mariners offered me a job. I couldn’t say no. It’s always been a dream of mine to work in the major leagues, on or off the field.” He lightly tugged her around the corner of the street. “Why’d you move up here?”

“My brother was leaving, and he offered his job to me. It was nice to have a new start. I’ve been here for about 5 years, now.” She glanced around at their surroundings and stopped. “Where are we going?”

“Just wait. As long as I didn’t get us lost, we should be there soon.” Their eyes met as he reached for her hand, taking it in his before he dropped it a moment later after noticing her hesitation. “Sorry, I just-”

“It’s okay,” she whispered as her hand found his again. He smiled to himself as they kept walking down the street.

“So your brother is here? In Seattle?”

“Not anymore. He died a few years ago.”

“Oh, I’m really sorry,” he paused in awkward silence for a moment. “I’m doing great here, aren’t I?”

“First date, and you already know about my dead brother. What’s next, you want a list of my childhood traumas?”

“No, we’ll save that for the second date. I’ll text you mine to make it easier.” She laughed as they stopped in front of a building. “Okay, we’re here.”

“The movie theater? Are we in high school?”

“What, dinner and a movie? It’s a classic.”

“You just wanna pull the cheesy yawn and put your arm around me, don’t you?”

“I mean, yeah,” he pushed open the door for her and led her into the lobby, purchasing two tickets for them. She couldn’t help but grin as his arm wrapped around her a few minutes into the movie, laying her head against his shoulder. They left the theater hand in hand, giggling about the cheesy romance of the movie while walking back to Link’s car. “So, I’m taking you?”

“Back to my place. I like you, but I just need to take things slow. I didn’t expect this from a tinder date.”

“What do you mean? You didn’t expect what?” He unlocked the car, opening the passenger door for her. She waited until he had sat down in the driver’s seat before continuing.

“I had this idea about online dating, that it’d be terrible no matter what. I was just expecting a crappy date that would help me put myself out there. And instead, I somehow found the one guy in the world who still believes in romance and giving things as ridiculous as tinder dates a chance.” Link smiled lightly and glanced over at her. “I’m just getting out of a pretty serious relationship, so I’m probably not what you’re looking for.”

“I like you more than I probably should, so I’m willing to wait for you. As slow as you want to take whatever this is, I’m willing.” She blushed slightly and looked down into her lap as he backed the car out of the lot. The car ride back to Meredith’s house was largely silent, besides him humming along to whatever song was on the radio. He parked the car in the driveway and stepped out, quickly opening her door before she had a chance. “Am I ever going to open a door in your presence?” He shook his head and walked with her up to the door.

“So, how long do I have to wait before I ask you out again?” Amelia smirked at him, leaning against the door.

“At least a day or two, don’t get too attached, yet.” He returned the smirk as silence settled between them.

“I really want to kiss you right now, if that’s okay,” his voice was soft, and she stepped towards him.

“Of course,” she whispered, his hand cupping her face while her eyes fluttered closed. Their lips met a second later, a soft kiss that ended too quickly for Amelia’s liking. She felt him pull away and opened her eyes to see him smiling widely. He stepped back a moment later, his hand falling away from her face and into his pocket.

“Alright, I’ll text you in a few days, just so I don’t get too attached.” Amelia waved gently, watching as he stepped backward.

“Thank you. I had a really good time.”

“Me too. Goodbye, Amelia.”

“Bye, Link.” She waited until he shut his car door before walking into the house, leaning against the closed door and grinning widely.

“It went well?” Meredith was standing in the hallway, a carton of ice cream in hand. Amelia nodded.

“It went really well.”

[pebblysand]

of breakable clay [extended author's notes on chapter viii of castles]

oh my god. it’s out. jesus christ.

okay first off, before i dive into anything, i know i’ve already done this in the actual a/n but i would like to wholeheartedly thank @whiffingbooks over on discord for helping me with figuring out the structure of things fic. although i have to admit i did not, at all, do what i told you i would do, talking it out was massively helpful in figuring this one out, so thanks a million. secondly, i would like send all of my most sincere and affectionate thanks to @whizzfizz on here, who mother-of-god basically designed this entire chapter and listened to me rant, and rant, and rant about it for days on end without complaining. i’ll go into a bit more depth later on, but THANK YOU.

now, a few facts on this chapter before i dive further in:

wordcount: 19168. i legit would apologise for this but i promised i wouldn’t so i’m not going to. that’s growing up people. don’t apologise for yourselves haha.

soundtrack: so i’ve never mentioned this but each chapter kind of has a soundtrack? like a song that i listened to on loop while writing this. here, i would basically point you to the entire spotify of a band called barns courtney (there’s one album and a few eps), i basically listened to all of their songs on loop this past month. i feel like they have such a strong gryffindor energy, in the good, the bad and the ugly. this chapter is definitely sort of an ode to gryffindors so their music was a very big inspo. if i had to point you to one song, it would probably be dopamine.

favourite line: ‘I dig my fingernails into the inside of my palms and it feels like the blood that comes out is already boiling.’

what is this chapter about? now, that’s an easy one. survival.

okay, now, spoilers under the cut.

ugh. holy fucking shit. i’m actually at a stage right now where i strongly believe that no one on earth will want to read this because everyone probably hates me right now for the choices that i made, especially after i made you wait almost three months for this shit. i always feel like whatever i’ve put out was the hardest chapter to write so far but this one was really out there in terms of struggles - i’m really sorry it took so long, but here we are.

there are reasons, though. first, as i said in my may round up, i didn’t really start writing this until about a month ago, because a lot of things were happening in my life that i needed to take care of. i took exams (which i passed!!!!), my mum had a health emergency, ireland added france to their mandatory quarantine list (it has been removed as of yesterday thank. fucking. christ) and i started a new job. it was a lot.

anyway, this being said, when i did get to writing this chapter, as mentioned above in the thank-you section, i kind of first struggled with the structure of it. now, you will see this is a recurring theme this time around but for this, my instincts were telling me one thing, and my brain was saying something else.

basically, what came first here wasn’t the actual content of ginny’s letters (more on that, obviously, in a minute) but the ‘mood’ i wanted for the chapter. i wanted to recreate, both for harry and for the reader, this sort of idea of being completely immersed in a book or a story. like, you know the kind of mood where reality just kind of blends out, where you start reading something and just. cannot. stop. i don’t think he’s much a reader (at least not canonically) and so i wanted this to take him by surprise, for her to take over his life with her words. i explained in the previous a/n [link] i chose to have ginny’s war be told through letters (basically, i thought it would be the best way to narratively tell her story), and i really wanted harry to experience what she’d lived through almost first hand.

now, interestingly, my idea for how to do this originally was to have the letters sort of be interwoven into the events of 1999, throughout the next couple of chapters (meaning this one and chapter nine). i had this idea in my head of him living through ‘real life’ things but not being able to take his mind off her letters, with the letters also sort of echoing the events that were happening in 99, etc. having the two plot lines develop at once and meet in the middle, kind of.

and i tried to write that. for a long time. spoiler alert, it didn’t work. i think the reason is that every time i sat down with it, i felt like i was doing a disservice to both stories. i mean: 97/98 is important, but 99 also is, you know? and by taking the narrative in and out all the time, it was like you couldn’t concentrate on one thing. it was just very messy and didn’t have the intensity i was originally aiming for because it kept being dragged out of whatever was the main action at the time. i wanted harry to get sucked into the narrative, for her letters to take over his life, but in the end, the impression i just got was that the whole thing was confusing af. instead of deeply caring about both, i couldn’t bring myself to care either for ginny’s story, or for his.

also, i just kept hitting a wall: a wall called harry. basically, i knew that the next two chapters (i.e. eight and nine) would stretch from january 99 to june 99. and for the love of god, no matter how many times i turned it around in my head, there was - to me - no way that harry as we know him would just pace himself to read her letters throughout all those months. like, harry fucking potter isn’t the kind of guy who ‘paces’ himself. he’s the kind of guy who doesn’t sleep for a week to get through it all, you know? this is everything that he’s wanted to know since last may, he’s been desperately looking for answers up to this point, there is absolutely not way in hell that he’d wait it out nicely until june. it felt ooc to have him read the letters over a few months. and i just kept hitting that wall over and over. i considered, at one point, building him reading the letters into flashbacks but flashbacks of flashbacks were, again, quite messy, and i don’t think her letters would ever be something he’d volunteer to re-read, so. clearly, it wasn’t working.

then, i think on a random sunday a few weeks ago, i just went back to the drawing board and was like: okay, say we just write all of the letters and go from there, what would happen? by the end of the day, i’d written 12,000 words and that was that, really.

now, the second difficulty, once i’d decided that was…. what you all probably want me to talk about.

i know this is probably not what you want to hear but: i didn’t really plan this? like, i understand that a lot of people have sort of a headcanon about what happened to ginny in that year in hogwarts but i … don’t. like, as planned as this fic is (which it is, i know where i’m going, i promise) that was always a bit of a blank-space-tbd in my head. i think that this story, as hinny as it is, is mostly about harry. and while i knew what i wanted for harry from her telling her story (for him to get sucked in, for him to realise that his war wasn’t the only war in the world ‘cause he’s been bloody self-centered so far, for him to realise that his plan to protect her didn’t exactly work because it didn’t cater for who she is, etc.), i wasn’t really sure what that story was. i mean, i knew it was going to be bad and traumatic, obviously, but i didn’t know what would happen. and still, to me, what i wrote is a version of that year. it’s not really my headcanon (i still don’t really have one), and i definitely accept other versions, if that makes sense.

this being said, i obviously had thought about it a little. i remember writing chapter one with that line: ‘They have sex for the first time, that day – his first time and it feels like hers, too, but he wouldn’t dare ask, not anymore, anyways’ and thinking i wanted to leave the door open. to me, it was a door completely open: it could have indeed been her first time, or she could have seen someone else (consensually) during that year, or she could have been assaulted. i honestly didn’t know but yeah, that was always a possibility in the back of my head.

then, to tell you the truth, when i wrote the first version of this chapter (the 12,000 words i mentioned earlier), it wasn’t there. i sat down and decided that i wasn’t going to go there. firstly, because, while you probably don’t know this, i’ve written about sexual assault before. my previous long fic, children, in another fandom, dealt (in part) with that. and i didn’t want to be the-fic-writer-who-writes-about-sexual-assault. especially because trust me, there are people who are a lot more legitimate to talk about this than i am. i also didn’t feel like it was necessary to the story, i could do without it and still explain ginny’s early behaviour in the fic, explain her trauma, and have harry realise the things i talked about before. secondly, i’ll be honest: i know this isn’t what people in this fandom want to read. the hinny pairing is mostly about love and fluff (which i love, btw, don’t get me wrong) and i was like, ugh, i don’t want to face the angry comments. i’m writing this a/n the morning before posting so i admittedly don’t know what the reaction will be but i do anticipate a lot of annoyance with me. i knew that a lot of people wouldn’t like it if i went there, and it was just easier not to.

but then, as i started editing, there was a comment (and this, ladies and gentlemen, is a testament to how much your comments fucking matter, okay?). a comment that i remembered reading on the previous chapter and could not get out of my head, no matter how much i tried. well, hello, @whizzfizz. i’ll happily give credit where credit is due. it read:

This made me think of something you mentioned earlier in the fic (possibly Ch1) about Harry not being sure if he was Ginny’s first but that it felt like it. I wonder if this is something that is going to come up in her letters to him.

and, so, it turned. around and around in my head, and i couldn’t get it out. and i kept saying to myself: no, you’re not going there. no, you’re not going there. and then, one night, i caved. i was like, fuck, i need to know if this person really meant what i think they meant by this. and so we talked. a lot. and, i did a lot of thinking. about women. about wars. about violence against women as a an inevitable weapon of war. about ginny being harry’s girlfriend, or ex-girlfriend (more on that later), and what that would have meant in their world. and @whizzfizz, you said something that in the end really sold me. you said: ‘at this point, i don’t think it would be realistic for it not to have happened.’ and, that was that, really.

because i was right, initially. amycus/ginny (ugh, the idea of a pairing makes me throw up in my mouth a little but yeah, there it is) isn’t necessary to the story. but i believe it to be necessary to what this story is trying to show. the plot held well without it, no questions asked. 12,000 words of the da and their battles, of ginny’s rebellions. it was fine. but i think i wanted more than fine. to me (and i appreciate how fucking pretentious that is, please slap me in the face *eyeroll*), castles is more than its plot. i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: this is about what is behind ‘all was well.’ it’s about trying to paint a realistic picture of their lives. and that includes the war. and realistically, as far as i’m concerned, knowing how humans fight their wars, knowing our history and the history of violence against women construed as a weapon in literally every conflict there ever was, there is no way that this didn’t happen. ginny says it herself: for us girls, it’s just the way wars are fought.

so, i did go there. and the whole fandom probably hates me for going there, but i sort of stand by it, i have to say. to be honest, on a sort of subconscious level, i kind of wonder: didn’t i always know i was going to go there? like, this fits perfectly into the plot to the point that i think it was probably in my head for much longer than i care to admit. now, i’m so, fucking excited to write next chapter because i finally get to write happy things, and hinny getting back together on rock solid foundations of openness and sharing, and trust, and i’m so, so glad. there are a couple of scenes in the next chapter that i’ve been working towards for months and i’m so, bloody excited to write them. everyone might hate me and i might just be writing this fic for myself now (lol), but again, i stand by the decisions i took. to me, it fits.

phew. okay, now that huge thing is out of the way and explained, here are a few more jumbled thoughts:

the more i think about it, the more i think that my reason for not wanting to be the-fic-writer-who-writes-about-sexual-assault is a bit ridic. children and castles, in that way, are so, so different. like, i appreciate the overlap between the silk fandom and the hp fandom is probably ridiculously small but if you’ve read both stories, they’re obviously very different. one thing that both stories centre on, though, is consent. and to me, that’s probably the most interesting element of ginny/amycus, and the most interesting element of writing characters within a restrictive pov, rather than an omniscient one. like, do i think ginny/amycus is rape? yes. 100%. do i think that ginny thinks it’s rape? that is a much more interesting question. she says it a number of times but i think to her, this is all about control. i think that because of what happened to her with tom, she’s someone who is terrified of losing control of her mind and of her own agency. so as not to lose that, she’s willing to do whatever it takes. it is a ‘you can control my body, but not my thoughts,’ sort of narrative. and, she never says it outright because i think psychologically she’s just not there yet, but tom is everywhere in these letters. and as her world just spirals out, she hangs onto the very few things that she can control: her relationship to harry, and her willingness to do what it takes for them to survive. she initiates the ‘relationship’ with amycus in an attempt to control her fate. later, as she explains to harry she feels a lot of guilt over what she did, and like a lot of sexual assault survivors, she thinks it was her responsibility. because i’m in harry’s head most of the time for this fic, i’m not sure i’ll ever really get to discuss that at length, but it’s definitely something that i wanted to show. another interesting question is: does harry think it’s rape? i think at that point in the fic, he doesn’t have the education, nor the vocabulary for that. i think instinctively (because he is someone who is very instinctive), he doesn’t blame her. if he blames anyone, it’s probably himself. he understands the necessity to do what you have to do to survive and thinks that no, no matter what she claims, that was not consented. that’s kind of what comes out in his annoyingly inarticulate letter to her at the end. beyond that, though, i think he’s a bit lost, just like she is.

on a mildly related note, there is something that i've been seeing a lot in the comments and that i feel like i should maybe address? namely: harry's reaction to ginny dating other people. i assume similar comments will be made about his reaction to ginny/alecto (meaning that he still decides to write to her, at the end of the chapter). i've seen a lot of people observe that he's much more 'chill' about it in castles than in canon. fair point but is he, though? like, he isn't happy about it in castles. and he's jealous as well. but he was never entitled in canon. he was jealous, yes, the chest monster and all that, but he never really did anything about it, and never really impeded on her right to see other people. now, this being said, i agree that in sixth year he might have thrown a tantrum, had she done what she did in castles, but that was sixth year. it was before the war. before he lost half a dozen people. before he had to adult bloody fucking quickly. this being said, i do think castles-Harry is more 'subdued,' i suppose, than canon harry. this is a choice i made early on, which to me is related to the fact that he kind of lost his 'voice' during the war. i mean, it took him six months of people talking shit behind his back to do a press interview to defend himself. i think with ginny, it's a lot of the same. he's a boy who blames himself a lot, and generally doesn't particularly think he deserves the people in his life. to me it's an evolution of his character within the the world of castles. i'm happy to agree to disagree on it, but to me it makes sense within the character evolution and the way the fic's gone, so to speak. now, obviously, he'll grow out of that in due course, but we're not quite there yet.

regarding their relationship, now, i have to say: one headcanon that i did have for this was her not outright telling everyone they’d broken up. i’m sorry, that plan was shit. i just don’t buy for a second that she would willingly have gone ahead with it, and i don’t buy for a second that tom wouldn’t have used her had he known they’d been together, ex girlfriend or not. plus, i think she needed something to hand onto, and that was her relationship with him. her letters. the belief that they would be together again. without it, i don’t think she’d have survived. and i think that summer after the war, they were totally on the same page, for different reasons. both of them kind of saw their relationship as the one thing that kept them afloat, the one good thing they had, partly also because they’d idealised it for so long. she says it as some point, it wasn’t a relationship, it was a lifeline (another sentence i came up with as a response to a comment, lol) and while that is toxic and was meant to crumble at some point, it was necessary for them, both during the war, and in the early days after it. i think her last letter to him is painstakingly correct on that one.

regarding canon, i know i’m bending a couple of things here, which i just wanted to quickly acknowledge: 1) i know jkr has said it’s teddy remus lupin. i just can’t believe, for a moment, that someone who hated himself as much as lupin did, canonically, would name his son after himself. naming his son after his best mate who died to young to become problematic though? i totally see it. so yeah, creative licence, it’s teddy james lupin in this house, lol. 2) when they meet neville in dh, he kind of hints that they’ve only just started to use the room of requirement a couple weeks ago. the text however, only says they’ve only been staying in it full time a couple of weeks ago. i needed them to have somewhere where to meet with the da and stuff, so i bent that a bit. it’s not strictly canon, but it’s also not not canon, if that makes sense.

on seamus blowing things up and talking about eight hundred years of oppression? full disclaimer, while i am french, i have been living in ireland for long enough to become eligible for citizenship in less than six months (yay!). i know some people have said that seamus is a bit of a cliche in the books/films and all (the only irish character keen on blowing things up, haha *eyeroll*), but i actually kind of love it? like, the whole thing about the cranberries and zombie at the start of the fic has been in my head for much longer than i care to admit. i love the idea that there’s this whole muggle war going on at the exact same time that no one ever talks about and actually, i find the idea of wizarding ireland v. muggle ireland and the whole political structure fascinating. like, is wizarding ireland an independent state? what’s the story there? i have a whole seamus fic in my head, partially on this topic, that i might or might not write one day.

lastly, i know this may sound a bit weird but i need to say it: once i’d figured out what and how i was writing it, i bloody loved writing this chapter. first stylistically, i really wanted to mimic the style of how i’d written the magazine article in chapter 5 (i.e. not writing out the whole thing but writing out in text the excerpts that harry focused on) and i love how that turned out. i think it was a good way to balance her words and his, kind of merging them into one, big narrative. second, as a writer, it was so fucking interesting to write someone who knows how to write, which believe it or not i’d never done before. additionally, i loved the challenge of editing this because it was like: i’ve got to edit this, but not too much? i was very careful about modifying and polishing too much of ginny’s speech in the letters because i obviously wanted it to sound like someone who was just writing as the words came to her, without polishing the words, the punctuation, etc. like i usually would. i wanted her to have quirks (she says ‘you know?’ a lot) and i played with her capitalisation and punctuation a bit too. i know these aren’t necessarily noticeable details but it was definitely something that i thought about and that was very fun and interesting to write, as a format.

wow, okay. this was LONG but i think i have everything i wanted to say. if you’ve read all of this (whyyyyy?), thanks so much for sticking around. if you’ve got any questions, anything i didn’t address, do let me know, anon or not, my ask box is open. now, i would love to say i’m going to chill or something, but the truth is that i have to a) actually do a last read through of the fic, lol and b) put it out. this is what i get for writing the a/n before finishing the damn thing, i guess. i’ll rest tomorrow, lol.

lastly, in terms of next chapter, realistically, i’d say eight to ten weeks. i have a full time job now and also, writing this was fucking exhausting and i need to take time out for a bit before coming back to it with a fresh mind. i will be writing other stuff though, i promise. i have a couple of prompts to get to (thanks!!!) and a couple of other ideas so i will probably be posting in the meantime, just not castles.

lots of love,

p.

[beauregardlionett]

this poem is my confessional (loving you isn’t a sin)

AO3 Link

A/N: big shout out to my man @sadwizardvibes for the inspiration AND for writing me a fucking song to go with this piece thanks for fueling my beauyasha brainrot man <3

If she was honest with herself, giving Beau that poem had been entirely an impulse decision. Yasha had told Jester she would work on it—which she did—and that she would find a special moment for it. But most of the moments she shared with Beau were special to her, so that didn’t exactly narrow things down. She cherished every conversation and tried her hardest to keep Beau safe. Especially after the events at the chantry, Yasha appreciated every moment she got with Beau.

So, she had handed the paper over and prayed she didn’t embarrass herself.

Beau had seemed flustered, touched, and Yasha had wanted nothing more than to kiss her then and there. But she had held back, because she wanted Beau to at least read the poem before anything else happened.

And then all of that insanity with Vess and Molly—no, Lucien—had happened, and Yasha found herself grateful nothing else had transpired between her and Beau. She hated to think the memory of their potential first kiss might have been marred by the events following.

Regardless, they were underway toward Aeor; the snowy landscapes were taxing, endless, and a little boring. Supposedly it was a good thing they had encountered none of the foretold beasts, but Yasha harbored a lot of pent up frustration and nerves. It would be nice to have something to take that out on.

At the end of their second day, Caleb set up his tower. He ushered them all inside to a haven of warmth and stained glass they were becoming steadily more familiar with. Dagon seemed understandably impressed with the magical structure and grateful for the guest room he was directed to.

Usually they would gather up for dinner together, but there seemed to be a silent, unanimous decision that exhaustion took precedence. They retired to their various rooms with yawns and quiet ‘good nights’, safe for the time being. Yasha lay on her back on the cot in the room with the floral mural. She traced an absent gaze over the patterns, identifying flowers in her head and hoping it would lull her anxious mind to sleep.

She couldn’t stop thinking about Molly—Lucien—and what they would do when they caught up to him. Yasha couldn’t stop thinking about Beau, about the poem she carefully tucked away to read later. Yasha couldn’t help but remember of Zualla as she stared at the flowers on her wall.

There was a knock at her door.

Pushing to her feet after a moment, Yasha walked to her door to poke her head out. She was confused about who might be at her door at this hour until her eyes found Beau fidgeting on the other side of the threshold.

“Hi,” Beau mumbled, hands behind her back.

“Hi,” Yasha breathed back, opening the door a little wider. “Are you okay? It’s late.”

“Yeah,” Beau said, voice pitching up a little at the end in a tell Yasha quickly realized meant she was nervous. “Yeah, I just uh…”

Yasha raised an eyebrow at Beau’s nerves, unused to a Beau who floundered. She realized in the second before Beau pulled the piece of parchment out from behind her back what this was about. The Aasimar flushed pink and her eyes flicked to the ground, embarrassed.

“This was…really beautiful, Yasha,” Beau mumbled, fingers fiddling with the edges of the paper. “But I uh…I noticed this.”

Yasha chanced a look up, Beau extending the paper and pointing to a tiny note scrawled in the bottom corner. She had forgotten about that.

In her messy, cramped handwriting, Yasha had scrawled the word harp? She had been considering turning her poem into a song, because it was always easier for her to express things through music. Plus, she knew that Beau enjoyed her music, so why wouldn’t she put it to chords? But Yasha ended up pushing the idea aside. It was one thing for Beau to like Yasha’s wordless performances, and a whole other for Yasha to direct poetry with music toward the woman of her affection.

“It was…just an idea,” Yasha said with a half-hearted dismissive gesture.

“Would you play it for me?”

Yasha felt her cheeks grow warmer, more red than pink now. But before she could give it too much thought, the Aasimar felt herself nodding. She stood aside and let Beau into her room, leading the monk back into the chamber painted with flowers.

Beau sat cross-legged on the floor across from Yasha as the Aasimar tuned her harp. She took a little longer with the task than strictly necessary, just so she could freak out in silence.

Of course, she had prepared chords for this, because she had run with the idea. But Yasha shied away from it, losing her courage. Music was something that had helped Yasha heal, a meditation in her own way. It brought her peace and offered her an outlet for emotions she didn’t quite know how to express. So, to have Beau sitting before her, eyes trained solely on Yasha, was intense and nerve-wracking.

If Yasha had learned anything, though, it was that she could trust Beau. The monk had been looking out for her, and for the entire group, since day one. Before Beau had trusted any of them, she had still been looking out for them. It was something Yasha admired about Beau—her capacity to care and to love despite everything she had been through. Beau inspired Yasha to keep fighting.

The least she could do was play this for her.

She didn’t need the parchment back. Yasha had spent hours pouring over the words and the chords to make sure it sounded perfect.

Oh, oh Beau, I’m grateful for you.

You waited while I wandered,

While everyone was wondering

If I’d ever come back, you stayed true.

Her voice faltered slightly at the start, uncertain and underused, but she persisted. Beau’s eyes on her simultaneously made her nervous and strengthened her resolve.

Oh, oh Beau, you mean so much to me,

I’ve lost so many people,

I cannot fathom losing

The woman who has loved so fearlessly.

Yasha rarely sang. She used to sing for Zualla in those quiet stolen moments years ago. When they were out in the fields alone, walking or hunting or just existing to stare at the stars. She sang once for Molly, both of them a little past tipsy after a good night for the circus. He had told her she possessed a voice fit for performances, but Yasha had waved him off.

Her voice was sweet, higher than her speaking voice because she sang from her nose and her head. It threw most people for a loop, but Beau merely sat there and stared. Her blue eyes were wide with awe, lips slightly parted. If Yasha didn’t know Beau couldn’t be charmed, she would almost think the monk under a spell.

And I’ve ambled and trekked over miles and miles,

Every step lead me straight back to you.

You gave me the space to learn where I belong

And I’ll tell you right now, it’s the truth.

It was almost like nothing else existed. Yasha’s fingertips buzzed against the taut strings of the harp, her voice vibrated in her chest, and Beau’s eyes stayed fixated on Yasha’s face. This was all that mattered right now, and Yasha couldn’t think of what existed before this, or what might exist after.

Oh, oh Beau, the one I’m thinking of,

I want to hold your hand and

Stand quietly beside you.

I want to confess, you’re my love.

The last strum of her harp faded into silence, and Yasha reveled in the peace vibrating through her veins. She had rarely known stillness like this before discovering music.

Beau sniffed, and Yasha twitched as she startled, eyes snapping up to Beau’s face. The monk still stared at her, eyes wide and watering.

No one’s ever written me a poem before. Yasha remembered the soft-spoken admission as a tear tumbled down Beau’s cheek. She guessed without asking that no one ever sung for Beau before, either.

“Yasha…” Beau breathed. “That was incredible. Your voice…”

The Aasimar ducked her head, not even trying to suppress the smile pulling at her lips. Beau’s awe was so genuine, Yasha barely knew how to face it head on.

“I didn’t know if you would…y’know want to hear it like that. Or if you would just rather read it,” Yasha rambled, running her fingers with absent focus up and down one string on her harp. “So…yeah, I mean, it’s a song, too. But it was originally a poem. For you.”

“Yeah,” Beau’s voice cracked. “I don’t—Yasha, that was…incredible. You’re incredible. You wrote that? For me?”

“Of course,” Yasha said, looking up again with a small frown. The note of disbelief in Beau’s voice upset her. Why wouldn’t she write a poem for Beau?

“Thank you,” Beau said, her voice overflowing with an emotion Yasha could empathize with, but couldn’t name.

“I am glad you liked it,” Yasha said as she set her harp aside. She didn’t know where to go from here. Jester had said Beau was waiting for Yasha to make the first move, and this…was this enough? It felt weird to question that kind of thing because Yasha had been married before. Theoretically, she should know how to do this. But then again, everything she and Zualla had done had been in secret. Yasha never learned how to express affection for someone openly.

And knowing what she did about Beau, Yasha figured that the monk had no better clue in any of this than she did.

“Maybe uhm…” Yasha started, but stopped. She didn’t want to mess this up. “Maybe after we finish this job…we could, y’know…get dinner? Just us?”

Watching a slow smile spread and pull at Beau’s lips was like watching a sunrise. It began slowly, a little hesitantly, colors bleeding into and washing away the darkness of Beau’s uncertainty. It was a gentle harbinger that lasted a lifetime in no time at all. Then, between one blink and the next, the sun. Beau grinned with wild abandon, lips pulled wide to reveal her teeth, and eyes scrunching at the corners with the force of it. Yasha’s heart went giddy in her chest at the mere sight of Beau’s joy.

“I’d like that,” Beau whispered. There was the same quiet, awed excitement in her voice from when she first received Yasha’s poem.

Yasha’s cheeks hurt from how hard she was smiling. “It’s a date.”

[duchesschameleon]

codependent idiots

an ajf playlist for @winterscaptain

hello tali! and everyone else reading this.

music is something incredibly important to me, as a musician and as someone who hates existing in silence. I always need something in the background. so, what better way to celebrate 100 ajf fics than with a playlist? tali, I am so incredibly proud of you for 100 ajf fics and so honored to have been part of the journey. and to be your friend. seeing the hard work that goes into this universe and how much you love it is just incredible. I cannot wait for what comes next and to see you continue to create and grow this universe that I love so, so much. you are amazing and wonderful and I love you to bits and pieces darling.

so without further ado, here’s the playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0RpXkdEbsdMqX6l5daBdaL?si=bae62e4556674c84

These songs make me think of ajf or just fit the universe - it’s not about one specific moment or one specific relationship, it’s ajf as whole. So I’ve included a little explanation for each song, considering there isn’t a cohesive sound.

paper rings - taylor swift

this one is pretty self explanatory. it’s a song about loving someone so much you don’t care how, when, or why you marry them. considering meraki, I think we can all agree this fits.

I will follow you into the dark - death cab for cutie

this is a song that screams going to the end of the line for someone. and we’ve seen time and time again (and I’ve referenced it in many a commentary) that aaron & mom lean on each other for everything. they are so reliant on each other for everything and I feel like this song captures it. 

be my baby - the ronettes 

another classic love song. and just the right amount of sweetness for aaron & mom I think. their love, to me, is a deep and everlasting love that endures and as we’ve seen in the fic, is filled with sweet moments between each other. and there’s a lot in this song about knowing you love someone from the start.

can’t keep on loving you from a distance - elliot yamin

this fits into berry hill/mean it ajf I think. it’s the yearning guys. it’s the not being able to love someone from afar anymore and wanting to do something about it. yeah I threw in a little angst, but this is one of my favorite songs. it’s good and it fits. it’s a crossroads.

die a happy man - thomas rhett

pretty self explanatory, listen to the lyrics. it's all about needing just the love of the person you love the most in this world. that is aaron and mom to a t. 

unforgettable - thomas rhett

okay an upbeat song! this one is not forgetting any detail from when you met the person you love. again, aaron and mom. also it’s one of my favorite thomas rhett songs. it’s about inevitability, knowing that you’ve found your person, and not forgetting a single thing about them. 

this will be (an everlasting love) - natalie cole

aaron always gives me classic song vibes, he likes the oldies and what he was raised on. this song is...it is happiness personified. it is happiness and joy in a song and you cannot convince me it wasn’t played at the wedding. 

make a life, not a living - brett kissel

okay so first off: brett kissel is an amazing canadian country artist whom I love dearly. this is his newest song and it was released just in time for this. this ENCAPSULATES ajf for me - this aaron that allows himself to live and love again, to have this happiness and joy. it’s all about making a life, and making a good one. this is ajf for me. 

between you and me - brett kissel

and this one is for all the 18+/nsfw moments. listen to the song and it's pretty self-explanatory. 

at last - etta james

it took them like 6 years (? I think) to get together and another 2.5 to get married. someone played this at the wedding and you cannot convince me otherwise. again, it goes to inevitability and how everyone was waiting for this to happen. we knew it was gonna happen, it was just a matter of when. so when it does happen, everyone’s screaming “AT LAST!”

kiss me - ed sheeran

okay this album came out in 2011, mean it happened in 2011...it fits. and this song screams mean it to me. that’s really all I have to say

give me love - ed sheeran

same reasoning as kiss me. I just couldn’t decide which one fit more. but they both work.

growin’ up - bruce springsteen

this song is less mom & aaron and more ajf in general. it’s rebellion and doing what you want - hello bau - and it’s just a great song about learning and growing up and doing things your way. also it’s me, there had to be springsteen on here somewhere

mary’s place - bruce springsteen

run with me on this one: you’re driving in the car with your family, people you love, and this song comes on. you can’t help but smile and sing along and it is happiness personified. this one is all about the vibes, not the lyrics or meaning of the song. this to me is a bit of a party starter and something that could play at every bau party. familiar faces, laughter, gathering people together….this is all about having a good time with people you love. 

we take care of our own - bruce springsteen

last springsteen song I promise. this one is similar to above, it’s all about a family and being there for one another. looking out for your own, looking out for each other. 

some day one day - queen

this is a great soft, sweet song talking about hope for mom & aaron. much like this is early in queen’s discography, it fits into the early years of ajf. 

you’re my best friend - queen

self explanatory. they are codependent, they rely on each other so much, they are best friends and lovers. it fits so well. and this song will always put a smile on my face.

another one bites the dust - queen

another unsub bites the dust because the bau is great at their jobs. and, this screams hotchner’s dancing around the kitchen or the living room. they seem like the kind of family to dance around and film each other for….no ulterior motive whatsoever (/sarcasm)

my wish - rascal flatts 

so this fits for the wedding vows BUT ALSO - during enough when aaron is thinking about how he’ll fit into reader’s life. he just wants them to have a good life, to find happiness. that is his wish for them. 

danger zone - kenny loggins

we all know the hotchner’s love top gun. they absolutely, unabashedly love this song and blast it for a dance party. 

landslide - fleetwood mac

maybe it’s because we sang this at my camp as a last night campfire song, but I can see this being a song sung to the littles to get them to settle down. the lyrics might not make total sense but it’s a bit of a vibe. 

this is it - scotty mccreery

it’s a great love song and I love it. it gives me ajf vibes for many reasons and many moments in the series

not alone - mcfly

OH ITS TIME FOR MY MCFLY SOAPBOX. mcfly is a band that yes, I mostly know because of the close geography of the internet and early 2010s british youtubers. they are a big band in the uk and they were in an early 2000s movie called just my luck with chris pine and lindsay lohan. I love the movie, I love mcfly. seriously, they are one of my favorite bands ever. not alone is a great song and one I think can be the background for many ajf scenes. and yes this is about to start a few mcfly songs on the playlist

I wanna hold you - mcfly

it’s just about being close and wanting to hold the person you love. how many times during ajf do we see mom & aaron with a hand on each other and reaching for one another? 

it’s all about you - mcfly

I tend to find this is the most well known mcfly song. it was written for one of the band members’ wife and it’s so good. and yes, again, it encapsulates the love aaron and mom have.

being alive - company

I kinda had the realization that this song screams aaron to me. that for so long he fought against his feelings and was almost content with being alone, with not having anyone. he sort of holds himself at arms length, like bobby does throughout company. and then at some point, there’s a switch. and he realizes that being alone is not the same as being alive and he wants to have someone to hold and someone to be alive with. and that’s what this song is about. 

louder than words - tick, tick, boom

there are so many times where aaron and mom just look at each other. they use their actions, their body language, and their eyes to communicate and forgo words. they don’t need words. and it’s not just with one another. it’s with jack and the littles and the whole team. actions truly do speak louder than words in this universe. 

always will - bright star 

it’s a mean it & mistletoe song. “we’re supposed to be/together it’s true/I’ve had my doubts/but not about you.” these lyrics SCREAM ajf and this is one of my favorite songs from bright star - WHICH IS AN UNDERRATED MUSICAL.

dirty little secret - all american rejects

okay so it’s never a dirty secret, but this fits in during the mean it arc. they’re so secretive and sneaking around. we needed one unhinged song here okay???

the power of love - huey lewis & the news

this is a song that fits the relationship, but is also something that could play in the hotchner house and get everyone singing and jamming. or could be played at dinner at uncle dave’s house to get everyone up and dancing on the flagstones.

sharp dressed man - zz top

it’s aaron hotchner. also, this is a song I can see aaron making his kids listen to (yes my dad made me listen to this a lot growing up)

I want to hold your hand - the beatles

yes we need a beatles song on here and yes this is one that always makes me think of ajf. there’s always some way people are touching - linking pinkies, holding hands, a finger through a belt loop, hands on the top of someone’s chair - touch and contact are important here so yes this is the requisite beatles song.

the heart never lies - mcfly

one more mcfly song. just listen to the lyrics and you’ll know why it’s one of my favorites. for as long as these two fought their feelings and denied them, the heart never lies. and their eyes can give it away.

[fearfulkittenwrites]

“Just a normal night”

Inspired by @s-mscott​ - link for the art, please check it out!

Word count: 2832

Notes: HEY. THIS IS JUST BEEN SITTING ON MY FILES FOR THE LONGEST TIME AND I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT IT DKJFHAKJHAKJDFH. Anyway, it's a long time coming. The writing probs isn't as neat or as good as the latest uploads bc of that, but... idk. Hopefully it's good! I couldn't bring myself to edit it again, sorry about that. I hope you can enjoy it anyways and please go check out the artist, @s-mscott​!

“Guys?” Dick asked, on his tiptoes as he rummaged through every cabinet in the huge kitchen “Hey are we out of cereal? I can’t find my Lucky Charms anywhere.”

“I think so.” Jason answered “I ate the last of the Lucky Charms last night.”

“Yep.” Tim said, popping the ‘p’ as he slid through the countertop, landing a bit behind Dick “I had the last of the frosted flakes two days ago.”

“Froot Loops?” Dick asked.

“I had those.” Duke answered “Sorry.”

“Fruity Pebbles?”

 Cass raised her hand, looking at the ground.

“Reese’s Puffs?”

“I finished the box yesterday.” Damian announced, crossing his arms as he leaned against the marble sink.

“Damn.” Dick murmured and pouted as he closed the cabinet’s door “I’ve been craving cereal today.”

“We can always go get some.” Jason shrugged.

“At three in the morning?” Duke asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Actually, four.” Jason corrected, putting up a finger “And yeah, why not? I mean, we had a hard patrol tonight, and if Dick wants some cereal, I say let’s go get some cereal.”

“It’s four in the morning, Todd.” Damian said.

“I mean, the closest Walmart is open 24/7.” Tim interfered.

“You can’t be seriously considering this, Grayson.” Damian frowned at his older brother.

“Why not? I’m not sleepy anyways.” Dick crossed his arms and shrugged.

“Yes!” Jason hissed “Late night adventures with the baby bats. Let’s roll!” He clapped his hands once, and started to walk out of the kitchen, his siblings following him to the garage.

“Oh wait!” Dick said “Let’s ring up Bruce and see if there’s anything else we need.”

“Bold of you to assume he’d know what we need.” Tim interfered.

“Yeah, well, it’s worth a shot. Plus, do any of us really want to wake up Alfred to ask him?” Dick said, taking his communicator out of his pocket and placing it in his ear “B? Have a sec?” He asked

“Nightwing. What’s wrong?” Came the answer, Batman’s raspy voice flowing through the device.

“Oh, nothing’s wrong. We’re going to take a quick trip to the supermarket, I wanted to ask if you need anything.”

“... At four in the morning?”

“Yeah. Do you need anything?”

Bruce sighed.

“We’re running out of the coffee blend that Tim likes. Alfred the cat’s favorite treats have been gone since last week, and Cass’ favorite ice cream is done. Oh, buy Duke that soda he likes, I drank the last can. Also, Jason’s cookies and that brand of chips you like, we ran out of those. Oh, and buy something with Iron in it, I’m worried that Damian might not be getting enough.”

“Like spinach?” Dick said, writing it down on his phone’s notes.

“Yeah, that’ll do. Ah, and we’re a little low on milk.”

“Okay. Will keep that in mind. Thanks B, have a nice patrol.”

“Please don’t give the papers any headlines.”

“You got it, B. Bye.”

He placed the device back on his pocket.

“Okay, there’s a lot of stuff to buy, so let’s get going. I’ll drive.”

“Shotgun!” Jason yelled.

“We’re taking the S.U.V., one of you will need to ride in the trunk.” Dick said.

“I’ll go.” Cass’ eyes twinkled. No one could understand why she was always so fascinated with the idea of riding in the trunk, but she seemed to find it fun and all of them thought that her excitement was cute.

“Alright then.” Dick smiled, ruffling her hair. Her grin grew wider, and Duke set her hair straight again before they got into the car.

“Hey, can I play my music?” Tim asked from the backseat.

“Don’t force us to listen to the atrocity Drake calls music, Grayson.” Damian complained, arms crossed “Let me play something.”

“Uh, I’d rather not listen to Mozart and Bach while we’re in the car.” Duke protested.

“It’s called classic for a reason, Thomas.”

“Doesn’t matter, bat-brat.” Jason said “I’m with him on this one. Besides, universal car rules, shotgun DJ’s.”

“Since when?” Tim asked.

“Since now.” Jason said, plugging his phone in.

“Uh, I don’t think so.” Dick took the cord from him “According to ‘Supernatural’ rules, ‘Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole’. So that’s mine.”

“No one else watches this show Dickhead!” Jason pulled the cord back.

“Doesn’t matter, because I’m older!” Dick pulled it back again.

“Age is just a number!” Tim pushed himself to the front seat and took the cord back.

“Great point Drake!” Damian pulled him back by his waist, stealing the cord from him too.

“Hey, stop with the fuss, I’m gonna crash the car!” Dick said.

“Maybe we should just play Beyoncé...” Duke suggested. The car went silent for a while.

“Okay.” Dick said “Put on ‘Single Ladies’.”

“No. ‘Halo’ is her best.” Damian complained.

“Uhm, no way? I’m playing ‘Drunk in Love’, and that’s it.” Tim shot back.

“Are you crazy? Play ‘Formation’.” Duke interfered.

“I like ‘Run the World’...” Cass said quietly from the trunk.

“Yeah, okay,” Tim murmured “We’ll play that.”

The girl smiled as the first notes from the song filled the car.

There weren’t many cars in the parking lot, which was expected. They picked up two carts, and Dick hopped inside the one Jason was pushing.

“Dude!” Duke started “You’re in your mid-twenties!”

“Leave me alone, I nearly sprained my ankle today.” Dick stuck his tongue out. No one else questioned anything beyond that. The employees simply sighed, used to the two older brothers and their antics.

“Hey Parker.” Jason greeted the nighttime security guard.

“Hey. I see you two brought the whole gang tonight.” He answered.

“Yup.” Dick smiled.

“So this is a regular thing for the two of you?” Duke asked.

“Are you really surprised, Duke?” Tim shot back.

“No. Not really.”

“Okay. First stop, Bruce said we need to get Tim’s coffee.” Dick exclaimed, looking at the list.

Jason led the way, Dick grinning like a child on the cart, Cass quietly following as she pushed their second cart, Duke making friendly conversation with her while Tim and Damian kept bickering right behind them.

“Oh, wait!” Dick held on to the metal bars “We’re right next to the cookies and Bruce said we’re out of your favorites, Jay.” He looked up.

“Alright, a little detour then.” Jason turned them around, quickly grabbing his treats “Anyone wants anything else from this aisle?”

“But... We don’t need anything else from the aisle.” Duke pointed out.

“Um, we have a billionaire’s credit card?” Tim said “Bruce won’t freak out if we buy a few extra things.”

“Uuuh, they have those koala shaped cookies!” Dick hopped out of the cart “How many do I get?”

“I want one.” Cass said.

“Chocolate or strawberries?”

“Uh… I want both.” She answered.

“Okay, one each for the lady, two strawberries for me...”

“I want a chocolate one.” Tim said.

“Me too.” Damian asked.

“Oh, just take twenty boxes, ten of each flavor.” Jason interfered, dumping them on Cass’ cart “We’ll share later.”

“Oh my God, those are expensive!” Duke said, exasperated.

“Yeah. So?” Jason shot back.

“Bruce is a billionaire, bro. He won’t mind.” Dick said, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“Yeah, well, it’s easy for you guys to say it. You grew up like that. It’s kinda hard to accept this when you aren’t used to having so much.” Duke answered, scratching his neck.

“Hey, I get that feeling lil’ bro.” Jason tapped his back “I spent my childhood in Gotham’s streets.”

“Yeah. I mean, I grew up in the circus. I wasn’t used to the idea of getting brand new stuff instead of asking for hand-me-downs from our friends whenever I grew out of my clothes.” Dick interfered.

“But... Just think about it like this.” Jason got closer to him “We now can get everything we couldn’t in the past.”

Duke frowned. Jason nodded encouragingly.

“That... Doesn’t help.”

“I tried.” Jason shrugged. Dick hopped back in the cart “To the coffee aisle!” He exclaimed, pushing his brother around.

“Hang on.” Tim said “This is where they leave the energy drinks. Let me take some.”

“Why do you insist on drinking this crap, Drake?” Damian scowled, reading the label in one of the cans “If you have such a death wish, jumping in front of a train is a much cheaper, quicker alternative.”

“Shut up, little devil.” Tim picked up cans from his favorite brand.

“Jason, push me a little farther down the aisle, please.” Dick asked “They keep their iced teas over there.”

“Ugh, Grayson, you disgust me.” Damian rolled his eyes.

“Don’t be so judgemental Lil’ D.” He smiled, being pushed away by Jason.

As they examined the cans, Dick noticed he had attracted the looks of a middle aged man, a couple of steps from them. He was staring at his hoodie, that contained the frase ‘I love dick’ printed on it.

“Oh,” He exclaimed, smiling at the guy “My name is Richard. That’s why it’s funny.” The man nodded “I’m also queer as fuck, so that makes it better.” He added nonchalantly, and the man’s eyes widened “Okay Jay, I picked up all I wanted, let’s go back.”

“Alright you little shits, back to the coffee quest.” Jason said, leading the way once again. This time, they finally made it to the coffee aisle. Tim crouched down, looking for his favorite blend.

Cass got a little curious once she laid eyes on a colorful package on the top shelf. She picked it up and handed it to Dick.

“Read. Please.”

“This is an espresso roast. Here it says that it has notes of strawberry? Vanilla and... Sugar cane. Colombian coffee. Seems nice. Wanna take it?”

“Yes.” She nodded. Dick dropped it on his cart.

Cass wandered away, still looking at all of the coffee blends.

“Hey girlie,” A guy whistled at her, next to his group of friends “Nice ass.”

She squinted at them.

“Yo, asshole!” Tim screamed, getting their attention “That’s our sister!” He threw a bag of coffee beans at the guy’s face, causing his nose to bleed.

“Hey, who do you think you are?” One of them started to walk up to her brothers. Cass could tell that he wanted trouble, so she grabbed his arm and slammed his face against the shelf, so quickly and brutally that it barely budged, leaving the products unbothered, but the guy fell to the floor, disoriented. She stared at him.

“We are Waynes.” Damian answered, pacing towards them quietly, hands on his pockets “I suggest you apologize immediately for the troubles, if you wouldn’t want to get a hefty lawsuit for your harrasment.”

“Uh, sorry bro.” One of them started, a little scared “We didn’t-”

“Not to me.” He interrupted “To her.”

“We’re sorry, miss Wayne.” All of them mumbled.

“Now promise you won’t do it again.” Damian added.

“We won’t do it again.” They started at the floor, next to where their fallen friend laid down.

“Good.” He squinted “Help your friend up, and get out of my sight.”

They did as they were told, helping his friend walk straight again. As Cass headed back, Dick gently touched her arm, looking up at her.

“Hey, are you alright?” She smiled and gave him a thumbs up. He smiled back.

“Does this happen often?” Jason asked.

“Sometimes.” She shrugged “But they always say sorry after I break their nose.”

“Ayy, that’s our girl.” Jason praised “Alright, we got the coffee. Where to next?”

“Let’s see... Next item is Alfred the cat’s treats.” Dick said.

“Ha!” Damian laughed loudly “As if Alfred would eat the... peasant treats that this store offers. No. I’ve already bought the adequate brand from an online shop.”

“Okay...” Dick raised an eyebrow “Then... Cass’ ice cream is next, but I think we should leave that as the last item, so it won’t melt, which leads us to Duke’s soda because Bruce had the last can.”

“Let’s go then. I think that the cereal aisle is on the way, so we’ll get that first.” Jason said, pushing the cart around again.

“Which ones do we get?” Tim asked, looking through the shelf.

“Everything that has sugar.” Dick answered. His brother began handing him boxes, when they heard a small whisper.

“Oh my God, are those...?” A girl said to her friend, attracting the eyes of the siblings. The duo averted their gaze quickly. Cass frowned at them.

“Relax.” Jason smiled, placing an arm on her back “They’re probably just... Fans.”

“Fans?” She asked, still staring suspiciously at them.

“Yeah.” Dick shrugged “I mean, we’re not super stars, but we do hit the papers pretty often. A bunch of people know us here in Gotham.” The girls were looking again, and Dick gave them a small wave, making them giggle “See? Nothing to worry about.”

“Hum.”

“Hey there, ladies.” Jason greeted, a cheeky smile on his face “What brings you to this fine establishment tonight?”

“We ran out of energy drinks.” One of them answered “What about you?”

“Cereal.” Dick answered, lifting two boxes. They giggled again.

“Hey, um... can we maybe get a picture?” The girl asked “It’s just that... no one will believe us when we tell them about this.”

“Absolutely not!” Damian answered.

“Nah, don’t listen to the little brat.” Jason said “Go ahead.”

Dick held up the boxes again, smiling as Jason made a ‘crazy’ motion with his hands. Tim turned around as the photo was being taken, turning him into a blurr with tired eyes.

“Can we get some selfies too?” The other one asked, grinning.

“No!” Damian protested again.

“Of course you can!” Dick said “Duke, Cass, come here.” He called.

All of them gathered around the cart Dick was staying at, even Damian. He didn’t look so pleased as the photo was taken, but neither did Cass.

“Thanks. You guys really are nice.” The first girl said.

“Oh, you have no clue on how nice I can be.” Jason winked, making her blush “Tell you what, why don’t I give you my phone number and you can text me those pictures later, hm?”

“Sure.” The girl bit her lips as Jason scribbled his number on her wrist.

“You are such a flirt.” Dick rolled his eyes as the girls walked away.

“What, like you aren’t?” Jason snorted, pushing him away, looking for where they kept the soda.

“I think Cass didn’t like that interaction very much.” Tim whispered to his older brothers, who turned around to find a frowning baby bat. Jason chuckled.

“What’s wrong, sis?” She scowled at him “Oh, c’mon, don’t get jealous.” He threw an arm around her shoulder “You know you’ll always be our number one girl, but a guy has his needs. And sometimes, a guy needs a date.”

Cass pushed him away, rolling her eyes as Duke placed five soda cans on her cart.

“Why would you even drink this sugar filled monstrosity, Thomas?” Damian asked, reading the labels “Grandfather wouldn’t even feed his prisoners something as revolting as this.”

“Because, Bat-brat,” He said “We’re all entitled to enjoy at least one or two things that may ultimately be responsible for our deaths.”

“I suppose.” He murmured, lifting an eyebrow “You make much finer points than the rest of them. Father has been looking for heirs in the least suitable places, I assume.” He clicked his tongue “It’s a good thing I’m here to help.”

“Okay...” Duke answered, raising his eyebrows and averting his gaze. There was only so much strangeness that he could handle.

“Great, now we need to get my chips and spinach.” Dick stated.

“Spinach?” Tim asked “Why spinach?”

“B thinks Damian may have been needing more iron in his diet.” Dick shrugged.

“Aaw.” Tim said “That’s actually kinda cute. Do you think he ever worries about our diets?”

“Don’t be stupid Tim, of course he doesn’t.” Jason answered.

“He does.” Dick shot back “He worries about us, he just... Really, really, really, reaaaally sucks at showing it sometimes.”

“Potatoe, potatoe.” Jason murmured.

“Yeah, whatever. Keep me moving Little Wing, we have stuff to pick up and my tiredness is catching up to me.” Dick pointed forward.

“Sure. But the chips are in the opposite direction.”

“Well turn me around then, do you want me to look like an idiot?” Dick said, a little exasperated.

“I wish you had an off button sometimes.” Jason sighed as he made his way to the chips section.

An employee, mopping the floor with a bored expression, looked up from what he was doing when he saw the Wayne gang talking loudly. Dick tried to control his brothers from inside the cart, and had just told Jason to separate a fight between Tim and Damian. Duke and Cass snicker as they saw a bored, six feet tall Jason pushing his much smaller brothers apart.

“Yep.” The employee murmured to himself “Billionaires shopping at Walmart at four in the morning. Just a normal night.”

Hey! If you made it this far, please consider reblogging this? It helps with spreading my fics and it makes me very happy, hahahaha!

Regardless, thanks for reading <3

[suituuup]

The Bachelorette

For a fic x art trade with @thehorriblyslowmurderer. Thank you, I hope you like it :D

rated: T

Word count: 2,5k

ao3 link

*

“Holy shit, it’s freezing!” Beca hisses as she steps out of the car, making a dash in the snow for the front door of the cabin the Bellas will be staying at for the next three nights. 

She punches in the code given by the owner via email and pushes the door open just as Chloe makes it to the top of the steps, following her fiancée inside. 

“Oh wow,” she breathes, taking in the huge space that’s a perfect mix of authentic and modern, with a jaw-dropping view of the range of mountains in the distance through the large bay window in the living room. 

The perks of having a famous girlfriend; they didn’t have to pay for anything, Beca having made a deal with the owners to promote the place on her Instagram while they stayed there for their bachelorette weekend. 

A fire is already crackling in the wood-burner and a welcome basket with goodies sits on the kitchen island. Chloe walks over, plucking the note. 

“Dear Beca and Chloe. We hope you and your friends have the best time at our cabin,” she reads outloud before taking a look at what’s inside: a couple bottles of wine, cheese, chocolate and fruits. “That’s so sweet of them.” 

Beca hums, sliding her arms around Chloe’s waist from behind and hooking her chin over her shoulder. She nips at Chloe’s earlobe. “How much time do you think we have until the others get here?” 

“We’re here, pitches!” Amy’s voice interrupts Chloe’s lusty thoughts before she can reply.

She giggles at Beca’s groan, patting her forearm and stepping out of her embrace to greet their friends. Everyone’s been so busy this year, their last reunion dating back to last New Years Eve. “Hey guys!” 

“We brought booze!” Stacie exclaims, holding up two bottles of tequila. “I’ve got like, a bunch more in the trunk.” 

“Let’s pimp this place up, ladies,” Aubrey instructs, carrying a box containing what looks like rainbow themed-decorations. 

“Oh jeez,” Beca mutters as once everyone greeted everyone, the Bellas move about the place to prep dinner and whatever else they have planned for herself and Chloe. “Should we be scared?” She mumbles to her fiancée. 

“Trust me, you haven’t seen anything yet,” Stacie says as she walks past them, winking. 

Yeah. They should definitely be scared. 

The first night turns out to be pretty low key, Jessica, Ashley and Aubrey whipping up an amazing dinner for all of them. They drink wine and play a drunken game of Twister and Cards Against Humanity, turning in rather early as they plan on hitting the slopes the morning after. 

“Today was so much fun,” Chloe gushes as she swipes through her photos once they’ve made it back to the cabin after their day spent skiing. “I even caught your fall on film.” 

Beca grumbles, trying to get her cold fingers to work down her jacket zipper. “You better not post that on social media, Beale.” 

“How’s your ass?” Chloe smirks, locking her phone and tossing it on the bed. 

“Bruised.” 

“Poor baby,” Chloe sighs, pushing to her feet and sliding up behind Beca. She peppers her jaw with soft kisses and nuzzles her cheek. “Come shower with me?” 

Beca seems to fight off a shiver, not one triggered by the cold. “Be there in a sec.” 

Walking into their fancy ensuite bathroom, Chloe turns on the spray in the Italian shower and strips the remaining layers on her body before stepping under the hot water. Slender arms loop around her waist less than a minute later, Beca’s warm body pressing against hers. 

“You think you can be quiet?” Is murmured against her ear as one of Beca’s hands slides downwards. 

Chloe bites back a moan, turning around in Beca’s arms and stepping back until her back hits the stone wall behind her. She watches with darkened eyes as Beca lowers herself to the tile floor and hooks one leg over her shoulder, Chloe’s eyes sliding shut at that first lick. 

When they eventually come out of the shower a while later dressed in matching robes, they find Bride-to-be shirts folded on their bed, along with a sticker stuck to one of them. 

quit boning and meet us downstairs! the party’s awaitin’

The back of the shirt sports selfie of them that they must have taken from Chloe’s instagram. 

“This is so cheesy,” Beca grumbles as she shrugs it on, but Chloe knows she secretly loves it. 

“There they are!” Stacie shouts when they make it downstairs fifteen minutes later. 

Music is pumping through Beca’s expensive wireless speaker and the coffee table is covered in various liquor bottles, snacks and a handful of pizza boxes.

“Have a seat, ladies,” Amy motions to the two chairs facing the couch with a flourish of her hand, bowing her head. 

Chloe and Beca sit down, and Jessica and Ashely set a rainbow tiara on their heads and sling a bride-to-be sash across their chests. 

“We had each of you fill out a bachelorette quiz a week ago, and you’ll have to guess the other’s answers. If you get it wrong, you have to take a shot,” Aubrey explains, motioning towards the row of shots set on the coffee table. 

“And if we get it right?” Chloe questions, cocking an eyebrow. 

She’s gonna crush this game. 

“You get to pick a present out of the gift bag.” She nods to the large tote bag sat between their chairs. “Any questions?” 

Both shake their heads as Aubrey plops down on the couch between Emily and CR. “Chloe, what is Beca’s favorite feature about you?” 

“That’s easy,” Chloe beams, glancing at her fiancée with heart-eyes.  “My eyes.” 

Beca rolls hers as Chloe leans in to kiss her cheek before reaching into the bag. She wraps her hand around a bottle and pulls it out, reading its label. “Ooooh, coconut massage oil.” 

“Boring. Alright, next question,” Stacey says, plucking the sheet from Aubrey’s hands and ignoring Aubrey’s objection. “What could Chloe eat every day?” 

Beca smirks, and without a beat of hesitation, replies, “Me.” 

Emily flushes hard, Stacie smirks devilishly, while Aubrey makes a face. The rest of the girls hoot and whistle, and the tips of Beca’s ears redden. 

“I knew you’d put something dirty on a bachelorette quizz,” Beca murmurs into Chloe’s ear a beat later as she leans across the short distance between them. “Otherwise I would have said pizza.” 

Chloe grins, leaning in to peck her lips. “Correct.” 

Beca fishes a gift out of the bag and unfolds the clothing item. Her cheeks turn a shade darker. “Wow, that’s… I have no words.” 

The pair of hot pink panties read: You may now bang the bride. 

“I love them!” Chloe says, snatching them from her fiancée’s hand. “I’ll keep ‘em.” 

“Chloe, what was Beca’s first impression of you?” 

“She thought that I was crazy,” Chloe replies. She shrugs, smiling sheepishly. “I did break into her shower.” 

“The word we were looking for was intense,” Stacie corrects with a tut. “Take a shot.” 

“Oh come on, she’s just being polite because I’m her fiancée!” Chloe argues with a laugh. 

“Take a shot, ginger!” Amy shouts. 

With a grumble, Chloe plucks the shot glass in front of her off the table and knocks it back, grimacing at the burn as it slides down her throat. 

Jessica is the one to ask the next question. “Beca, what was Chloe’s first car?” 

“Seriously!?” Beca asks. “How am I supposed to know that?” 

“You do!” Chloe points out, a shit-eating grin spreading across her features. 

“Really?” Beca mumbles and reaches out to take her first shot. 

“My old Jeep! We had sex in it,” Chloe blurts out, giggled as Beca chokes a little on the liquid. “And broke the front seat.”

“TMI,” Aubrey winces, her nose scrunching up before she takes a sip from her red solo cup. 

“Chloe, what job did Beca want to do as a kid?” Emily asks. 

Chloe’s eyes light up. “Oooh, she wanted to be a detective!” 

Beca chuckles. “I was obsessed with Scooby-Doo as a kid.” 

“Aw, you found your real life Daphne!” Ashley gushes while Beca rolls her eyes. 

She bends to pick something from the bag, pulling out a pair of padded handcuffs. 

“Oh, nice! Ours isn’t padded,” Chloe comments, as she takes them from her fiancée. She leans in to whisper something into Beca’s ear. “I know you like it when it hurts, but I don’t like seeing you all bruised up.” 

“Beca, your submissive is showing,” Stacie states when Beca blushes from Chloe’s comment, plucking the sheet from Emily’s hold. 

“Beca, what’s Chloe’s biggest accomplishment?” 

“Easy. She has two: winning the Worlds and getting into vet school.” 

“Nice, babe,” Chloe praises, holding her hand up for a high-five. 

By the time they’re finished with the questions, Chloe is definitely buzzed (she had like three shots out of fifteen questions, which isn’t too bad in her opinion), and they’ve added a few gifts to their pile, a variety of sweet and kinky: matching Mrs and Mrs mugs, a bottle of lube, two sets of gorgeous satin pajamas, a spa treatment for two at Chloe’s favorite establishment in NYC, and a strapless strap-on (the best in the market, according to Stacie). 

“Now we believe Beca has something planned for Chloe,” Aubrey says as she stands, taking Beca’s phone from Beca’s hand. 

Chloe’s head whips to the left towards Beca, an eyebrow raised in surprise. “You do?” 

“Mhm,” Beca hums while four of the girls move the coffee table to make space. She brushes a too short kiss to Chloe’s lips, pulling away before Chloe’s ready to end it, and casts her a wink as she steps backwards. “Go sit in that armchair.” 

The opening notes of Beyoncé’s Dance For You drift through the speakers, Chloe’s jaw dropping when she realizes Beca is about to dance for her in front of their friends. 

“Oh my gosh,” Chloe breathes out with a laugh, her body temperature cranking up a notch as she gets comfortable. 

Beca’s hips start to swivel to the beat of the song, hands leaving her hips to slowly hike up her sides. Her fingers tangle into her brunette hair as she twists to stand sideways and slowly shimmies lower. One hand leaving her hair, Beca traces her bottom lip with her pointer finger and bites down onto the tip before she straightens, arching her back so her ass sticks out as she rises from her crouched position. She adds a hair flip to the mix before slowly strutting towards Chloe, perfectly on cue with the beat, all the while keeping her gaze locked with Chloe’s.

“Work it, girl!” Stacie shouts as Beca stands in front of Chloe, bending down so that they share the same breath. 

A chill runs down Chloe’s spine as she resists closing the distance between them, knowing from the wickedness flashing in Beca’s eyes that she’s bound to pull away before their lips can touch.  

Beca spins around, her hips matching the chorus as she bends at the knees with her legs spread and grinds it low for a few beats. Her perfect ass brushes against Chloe’s body on her way back up, and it takes everything in Chloe not to grab and squeeze it. 

The volume rises around them as the girls cheer and hoot, but Chloe can only focus on Beca and how sexy she is as she turns back to face her, hands running through her own hair then drifting down the curve of her neck, over her breasts and stomach. 

“It’s called a lap dance for a reason, shortstack,” Amy calls out as the song flawlessly transitions to Drunk In Love, the perfect arrangement no doubt one of Beca’s works.

Chloe’s mouth dries up as Beca sets both hands on Chloe’s knees and spreads them apart. 

“No touching,” Beca husks lowly, nipping at the shell of her ear and eliciting a quiet moan from Chloe. She turns around and her hips start to move in a slow, sensual dance; swerving, popping, grinding and occasionally rubbing against Chloe’s crotch. 

Spinning back around, she braces a hand by Chloe’s head and sets her right knee in the space between Chloe’s left thigh and the arm of the chair, rolling her body towards Chloe once. She straddles her lap next, her lips parted to accommodate her heavier breathing as she stares down at Chloe. 

Chloe’s fingers dig into the leather of the arm rest to keep her hands from touching Beca as her hips gyrate in lazy circles in her lap. When the song comes to an end, Beca cups her cheek, pulling her into a deep, languid kiss which Chloe eagerly returns, finally giving in to the burning desire and palming her ass, giving both cheeks a firm squeeze. 

“Alright, alright! We get the message,” Aubrey’s voice cuts through their lustful lip lock. 

“That was so freaking hot,” Chloe breathes across Beca’s lips, nipping at the bottom one before backing away. “I need the rest of that performance later.”

Beca wets her lips, smirking. “Deal.”

Games less centered around the brides-to-be follow as they pass around a joint of weed and eat pizza while sprawled out on the various couches in the living room. 

It’s past three am by the time they head upstairs, and Chloe can tell by the expression on Beca’s face that she’s high. Chloe only took one hit and feels fine, if not still a little drunk from the shots she downed at the start of the party. 

“You okay?” She asks, catching Beca staring at her with a look as she pulls her sleeping shirt over her head. 

Beca nods. “I’m just… we’ll be married in less than a month.” She seems to ponder on her words for a few seconds. “Married. That’s like… big.” 

Chloe raises an eyebrow and steps closer, lowering herself on Beca’s lap as she sits at the foot of the bed. “Are you freaking out?” 

“Weirdly, no,” Beca replies as her arms loop around Chloe’s waist. “I actually can’t wait. For our wedding, our honeymoon, our kids…”

“Our kids, huh?” Chloe questions in amusement. She twirls a brunette lock around her pointer finger. “How many kids are we talking?” 

“Mmm, at least two. I didn’t like being an only child and you loved growing up with siblings so I want that for our children, too.” 

Chloe’s smile is so big, it almost hurts. “Sounds like a good plan.” She brushes a kiss to the apple of Beca’s cheek. “You know what else sounds like a good plan? You giving me the rest of that performance. Preferably with less clothes on.” 

Beca’s eyes darken at that, her lips curving into a smirk. “Yes, ma’am.”