#Of course now this comes at the expense of quality so that's why I'm trying to keep things simple

[jinwoosbabyboo]

“Will You Marry Me?"

How I imagine LADS Men would propose. This is part 2 of 2. I tried to do the sweet elegant writing, but that ain't me so here you go....

Xavier

Our lover boy Xavier is a literal prince. I feel as though he'd be very traditional with his proposal. The only unfortunate part is he can't ask for your fathers/family blessing because you know .... Anyway :)

He would definitely court you for a week even if you’ve already been together for over a year. The day of his proposal he would take you to a spot only he knows that has zero light pollution. Of course it’s deep in the forest.

MC: If I didn’t know any better I’d say you’re trying to kill me and hide my body Xavier: You have such creative thoughts MC: Seriously where are we going? Xavier: Somewhere special MC: So mysterious even after a year of dating

He’d bring you to a clearing that seemed like it was being lit up by a spotlight. It’s not though he chose to propose on a night with a full moon and clear skies so you could see how beautiful the stars are without all the city lights.

MC: It’s otherworldly Xavier: This was my favorite place to come when I needed clarity MC: Why didn’t you show me sooner? Xavier: I wanted to save it for a special day MC: oh what are you going to propose or something?

You’d be laughing and boom he pulls a ring out of his pocket shutting you right up.

MC: Oh shit! You’re really proposing Xavier: Yes im really proposing

His speech is so sweet it could give you cavities not only would he emphasize how much he loves you he’d let you know just how much he is solely yours. Even if you were to one day forget him and how much he loves you he would still always be yours and would do anything to keep you safe & most of all happy.

Xavier: My lady will you marry me? MC: I want nothing more

He might’ve been sweet and soft spoken during his proposal but that shy boy facade went out the window when you two got back home.

Sylus

It’s canon that Sylus gets nervous when he wants to ask you out. So just imagine how nervous he is getting ready to propose! He already constantly gifts you pretty gems and the gifts just keep increasing over the course of 3 months.

He second guesses himself thinking you may say no so he keeps putting it off but continues to shower you in gifts, quality time, full body massages, shopping sprees, dinner dates, lunch dates, you name it he’s doing it, you want it he got it. He’d be spoiling you so much you’d have to sit him down and ask him what’s going on. He would dismiss your concerns of course.

MC: Are you guys leaving for a while? Kieran: Why do you ask? MC: Sylus has been acting weird I feel like he’s about to disappear again Luke: That was one time and boss only did that because you asked him to leave you alone MC: I know but I’m worried now Luke: Relax miss hunter you’re overthinking

The twins would indeed gaslight you while Sylus worked up the nerve to propose. When he finally has the nerve to do it he goes all out. I’m talking he'd rent out the most exquisite restaurant money can buy. A whole staff at your beck and call. He'd wine and dine you with delicious food and expensive wine. By the time dessert comes you'd want answers.

MC: You're leaving me aren't you Sylus: Jumping to conclusions are we? MC: I'm serious Sylus you haven't been yourself lately you're worrying me Sylus: I guess this is the part where I explain myself

With two snaps of his fingers the twins would rush out; Kieran placing a giant box bouquet of red roses in your arms and Luke placing a crown on your head before rushing out leaving the two of you alone.

MC: What's this? and what am I a Princess? Sylus: You are and I'd love to change your title to Queen MC: Stop are you....

I don't picture Sylus giving a long winded speech. I feel like he would be the type to write it down so you could cherish his words forever.

Sylus: Will you marry me Miss Hunter? You can say no if- MC: Of course I'll marry you

Yet again I'm tackling this man as soon as he slips that ring on. Need to be in his arms immediately. Expeditiously.

Zayne & Rafayel here…

[hbprophetie]

I'm selling little Snape goods with my art to support my daily life!✨

My fellow Snape fans! Long time no see, I hope you've been doing alright. I'm back once more, after what might be my longer absence on here so far.

I owe you an apologize, and even if I won't develop very deep on my personal situation, I wanted to give you some kind of explanations. I've been leaving far from home in Japan for more than 2 years now; last year, I started to work as a 2D animator for the anime industry in Tokyo, and got through a very difficult experience. Working culture in Japan is far from the one why might have in Europe or in the rest of the world, and the anime industry makes no exception; insane working schedules, very bad working conditions, no consideration of personal life and low salary are basically considered as the norm here. Sometimes I was shamed for only working +50 weekly hours and not commiting to work for free on weekends.

As I couldn't stand the toxic environement anymore, I finally moved to the Japanese countryside where I managed to find a little animation studio that works on my favorite series of all times: Pokémon. My collegues now are all very nice peoples, I feel accepted and respected despite the very rought working conditions; But above alI can now realise my dream and work and be implied on my childhood favorite anime.

However, I get close to no money from my long 6 working days week. I hardly pay the rent, and I rely on my savings for paying bills and food. I'm happy and I'm not in immediate danger: I have been saving money in preparation for this kind of cases for years before moving to Japan; However, I want to continue to pursue my dream and know that in the long run, I cannot afford to leave a life that doesn't allow me to move more freely and meet my family even if it's only one time in two years.

That's why I'm now trying and hope to develop a little side hustle to help cover the daily life expenses while developing my skills for creation and illustration. I have little to no visibility on social medias and it's difficult, but I want to trust time and would be extremely grateful in even a few of you could consider checking my work if interested. Of course I don't exclusively draw Snape, but I'm putting all of my heart in my recent illustrations including Pokémon fanart, food illustrations and sketches on the daily life in Japan. My main tumblr is https://lucie-foselle.tumblr.com/ , I also have a IG page called "tenma_draws_pokemon".

However, I have a little treat for you Snape fans: I recently come up with the idea of making postcard and stickers with some of my Snape fanarts. I'm pretty happy with the result and would like to propose you to get them if you want to either get a little Snapey decoration, want to share your love to another Snape fan, or support me and my work!

Everything is printed, signed and stamped on demand! Note that the colors and result might therefore look slightly different than the pictures. My stamp will also appear in the 2 darker background cards, as featured in the visuals bellow.

Everything is made by me, I print in a small local shop and look for the best quality as possible for the illustrations! I can ship worldwide from Japan, and it would be made with love, care and an immense gratitude.

✨ Poscards (4 patterns available now, can be seen on this Tumblr) ✨

Price: 3$/3€/3�� /pc, worldwide shipping included! ✨ I can make little discount if several items are bought.

Size: 10x14.7 (~3.9x5.7 inches)

The little pumpkin is part of a collection I have on my main illustration Tumblr, you can check at https://lucie-foselle.tumblr.com/)

✨ Stickers (Snape crest pattern) ✨

Price: 3$/3€/3£ /pc, worlwide shipping included! ✨

Size: ~5x6cm (~2.5 inches), might add holographic effect. ✨

You can contact me via DM here or on my IG, and payement is made via Paypal. I plan to launch my kofi page soon and might consider selling other goods and take commisions in the future if I feel like it could interest some of you! 💚 I can either draw and animate, still have to sort it all for 2025! 🤗

Note that I would do my best but I'm just starting to print and ship my art, there might be a little delay in the shipment and the goods might take up to 3 weaks to reach you. Plenty of non Snape pattern are also available so if you are interested do not hesitate to check or ask, my DM are open! 🤗

Even a little like, comment or share gives a lot of support. 💚 A huge thank you to all of you who would have read until now, and would show a little bit of support! ✨ Have a good rest of your week-end, fellow Snapers. 🐍

[nartml]

To Pimp a Butterfly and 1989: a rant

Listen here, three things about me are that I'm a) white as snow, b) Greek, c) still a minor.

What does this mean? It means that I obviously wasn't raised with hip-hop, and I got into Kendrick Lamar's music pretty late.

As in, early this year.

I've known of him for some time, and the moment I found out he had a Pulitzer prize at some point in late-ish 2023, I decided I had to sit my ass down and pull out Spotify.

Now, as an avid reader of both fanfiction (ao3 raised me) and books [I feel the immense need to clarify that I don't associate myself with mainstream booktok. Capitalism's consumerism has overrun that shit and all I see are the same 20 books being recycled and recommended (a substantial amount of those are Colleen Hoover and her variants). Tropes and spice* are officially the defining factors of whether a book is worth it (*your porn addiction ain't cute) and quantity is heavily prioritized at the expense of quality. Also, diversity who?], I was, for a lack of a better word, hyped.

A Pulitzer prize is nothing to scoff at in general, more so in music, more so in hip-hop.

(Edit: Upon quick reflection, I realize that putting emphasis on hip-hop can come across as coded.

I am in no way, shape, or form trying to undermine hip-hop or say that it's somehow less 'sophisticated' than, for example, classical music. I'm very aware of the amount of skill and technique one needs to write a masterful hip-hop album, and I'm not doubting that there are hip-hop artists out there who are also incredibly deserving of such a prize. I meant it in the sense that I've unfortunately never heard of another hip-hop artist who won a Pulitzer before, which is quite telling.)

That's some huge shit, and I'd be a fool not to be intrigued.

Admittedly, I didn't get on that immediately. For a while I procrastinated, because I wasn't in the mood to hyper-fixate on anything new just yet.

Which of course meant I ended up forgetting about it for a few months, because of course I did.

But then I came across a TikTok that talked about how it was insane that '1989' won the Grammy when To Pimp a Butterfly was right there.

Now, a fourth thing about me is that I don't fuck with Taylor Swift.

And a fifth thing about me is that I'm not baseless in anything that I do, say or feel, and that includes annoyance.

Her immature understanding of activism and feminism leaves a bad taste in my mouth. The way she built up her fan base around this portrayal of her as a relatable girl's girl, her refusal to accept criticism, and always making a victim out of herself (even now when she's in her thirties and is a fucking billionaire) while never using her position of power and privilege for good are all reasons that serve to fuel my dispassionate dislike.

And before any Swifties get on my ass, no, I don't think that "But she's a singer! Why are you expecting so much out of her, she isn't even qualified to speak on XYZ—" is a good enough excuse.

She has always been rich, and now she's a billionaire. There are no ethical billionaires, and that includes her.

Fame is influence is power. Uncle Ben said it all: With great power comes great responsibility.

And let me tell you, I don't see her owning up to that responsibility, especially after all that talk about how she supports women, supports the LGBTQ community, and supports the BLM movement. Has she ever actually put her abundant money where her mouth is?

I've never seen her speak about anything that doesn't immediately concern her.

Don't get me wrong. She's not the only celebrity like this out there. I'm sure there are worse cases. I know it for a fact.

To wrap this segment up before I get even more sidetracked, I'll outright state that I don't hate her, because hating her would by definition mean that I, in some way, actually care about her, and that just sounds exhausting.

Best way to describe me is indifferent, leaning towards distasteful.

She's annoying.

And that's how I feel about both her as a person and her as an artist.

I'm not denying her talent, nor her impact on the industry, nor the fact that she does have good songs that even I like.

A select few, of course, but still.

Apart from those...what? Ten songs? I have never, ever been able to listen to any other song of her's all the way through.

I get bored. They do nothing for me. They sound empty. Hollow. Plastic. Repetitive.

Her lyrics, that are praised by fans for being deep and complex, sound pretty surface level to me.

Not all of them. But I'm a sucker for analysis. A literature nerd. Greek is my native language. I can tell when something's deep and when something wants to be deep.

(Not necessarily including Folklore and Evermore in that category. Her storytelling ability is actually great.)

Her music largely sounds like it wants to be deep.

Most recent example being her latest release, The Tortured Poets Department.

Anyway, back to Kendrick.

My initial plan was to listen to 'DAMN.' first, because that's what he won the Pulitzer for in the first place.

There was a change of plans after that TikTok.

I decided to compare the opening tacks.

I put on Welcome to New York, and predictably, I felt nothing.

The rhythm is dance-y, I suppose. But there's nothing substantial about it. There's nothing exciting about it.

The lyrics are juvenile, and I get it, it's a pop song and she was in her twenties.

Nobody is expecting Shakespeare (no matter how much you scream or kick your feet, the only reason Shakespeare couldn't write Taylor Swift is because he's in another league entirely) or Odysseus Elytis. Nobody is expecting mind-blowing lyricism.

But it's the opening track to an apparently Grammy-worthy album. The very least I'd expect from it would be some additional levels of artistry.

Am I being harsh? Probably. Do I care? No.

Disappointed but unsurprised, I put on Wesley's Theory.

I ascended within the first minute.

Don't get it twisted, I barely understood shit.

Not only am I white, I am also entirely removed from America and its culture as a whole. I don't know what's going on there in y'all's daily lives.

And this was baby's first proper introduction to hip-hop as a whole.

My untrained, white-ass ear barely caught two references. I got what the gist of the song was about, and that's about it.

I had to look up analyses of the track to fully grasp what Kendrick was on about, and even then, there was obviously still a disconnect.

And I expected all of that.

I didn't expect to get hooked on that song within the first listen.

I swear to fuck, the beat is addictive. I swear to fuck, even when I was fighting to understand what the lyrics were referencing, I was having the time of my life.

Even I, an amateur in every sense of the word, could tell that there was depth and there was quality and there was intentional meaning in every line of that song.

It didn't matter that I couldn't understand it. It mattered that I knew it was there. Not because someone told me that was the case. But because it was audible.

I listened to the next track. And the one after that. And the one after that. I had listened to all of the tracks, before I knew it.

And the evident permeance of quality, of substance, carried on throughout the whole album.

It had exactly the type of lyricism I'd expect a Grammy-worthy album to have. It had exactly the amount of artistry I expected a Grammy-worthy album to have.

Even better, it had all the ingredients I expected a timeless album to have.

The poetry Taylor Swift fans insist hides in her discography, I found in plain sight within Kendrick Lamar's.

After meticulously reading the lyrics, I watched video essay after video essay, searched for analysis after analysis on this album, each time understanding the meanings behind it a little better.

Needless to say that the Grammy's are rigged and I love Kendrick Lamar.

Hip-hop is gorgeous.

[mdzs-owns-my-ass-i-guess]

That's why he's making six figures (working three days a week)

This is just self-indulgent sugar baby WWX thirst fic (and me inspiring myself to work hard and become Lan rich).

Warnings: slight suggestive implications

Wen Ning watches, splayed onto the newly acquired leather couch in his and Wei Wuxian's living room, as his roommate picks up yet another suspiciously unmarked box from his doorstep.

"New order?"

"Mhm!" An excited smile, "Lan Zhan tore through all my lingerie last week, so I ordered some more... among other things. Wanna see?"

"No, thank you!"

"Aw, come on, I thought you liked lace?" Wei Wuxian smiles, teasingly, and Wen Ning resolutely hides his face in a throw pillow. "Don't play innocent now, didn't you just buy a Victoria's Secret thong for-"

"Please stop talking!"

Wei Wuxian laughs, plopping the box onto the glass coffee table (which is also new, by the way, the sleek, fancy kind that has a hanging tray and double glass) and tears into the box like a feral cat.

Wen Ning looks, in spite of himself, and is surprised to see very few pieces of... well, it can't be called clothing, in the package, and a little black box that he does not want to know the contents of.

"That's... it? I expected... I don't know, a lot more of these... items, maybe. Wasn't this 1500$?"

"2500$, A-Ning." Wei Ying replies, playfully rolling his eyes as he scans through the items, assessing the sizes and the quality, and Wen Ning is scandalized how those... strings cost three times his highest ever wage.

"And Lan Wangji is... okay with this?"

"He massively encourages it." Wei Wuxian smiles, a bit too dreamy. "He likes it when I spend his money, says it's why he works for it."

Wen Ning looks at his friend, incredulous. "He works for it so someone else could spend it?"

"No. So I could spend it. It's a difference, A-Ning."

"Of course there is." he deadpans. "I'm just too poor to understand it."

Wei Ying shrugs as unpacks a... whatever that is. Wen Ning can't tell, it looks very intricate. "I don't understand it either, to be honest. But I get money and sex, so why bother?"

"You guys aren't official?"

Wei Wuxian tilts his head. "Official?"

"He hasn't - you guys are still... transactional?"

There is a ping, and Wei Wuxian picks up his brand new iPhone (that replaced his first generation knock-off smartphone, courtesy of a certain millionaire Lan), a smile on his face and eyes sparkling as he types a response quickly.

"Why would we be anything but that?" Wei Wuxian answers distantly as he takes a picture of the contents of the box, presumably to send to Lan Wangji.

He looks entirely smitten, and only an edge excited. Wen Ning gives him a flat look. "He... took you to Aruba, all expenses paid, just because you liked a picture of a beach on Instagram."

"All sugar daddies do that. Ask Huaisang."

"He gave you your own limitless black card."

"Again, that's regular sugar daddy behavior."

Wen Ning is trying not to become frustrated. "You met his family! On a yacht trip!"

"I was arm candy."

"Wei Wuxian! You've been with him and his son to Disneyland for the kid's birthday!"

Wei Wuxian falters ever so slightly. "Okay, yeah, that's sus, but consider this - he needed help with-"

"I'm calling Qing-jie."

Wei Wuxian throws a pair of panties at him. "You complain way too much for someone who got new furniture and a motorcycle just for being my best friend."

Wen Ning picks up the item off his head with the very tips of his fingers. "It's a full time job, Wei-gongzi."

"At least it pays better than your regular one!"

"Oh, by the way, the boss asked about you. Are you quitting or...?"

"Nah, I need something to do when Lan Zhan is busy or I start missing him."

Wen Ning stares, judgmentally. "And you guys aren't anything but client and provider."

"I don't know why you'd think-"

The phone rings and Wei Wuxian's face lights up as he immediately picks it up and skips to his room. "Lan Zhan! Are you coming back yet? I'm so lonely without you and I was thinking-"

Wen Ning sinks back into the plush sofa and sighs. Maybe he could ask Nie Huaisang about this sugar baby business one of these days, he's had quite enough of his workplace after all... It can't be that hard to manipulate people into giving you money, right?

And anyway, he's going to be needing it soon. Once Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji realize they're actually in love, they'll immediately get married and he'll need to get them a good wedding gift.

It's bad taste to use the money Wei Wuxian's given him to buy a gift for his wedding, right?

[megumi-fm]

Hi Meg, I was wondering if I could get your insight on something... I'm interested in bioinformatics as a career but am not sure whether I should pursue just a Master's or try for a PhD. How did you decide how far you want to go with your education? I noticed you mentioned you hope to do a PhD someday? Thank you so much!

hey anon! okay, so in this answer I'ma focus on two things:

my thought process behind finalizing on a PhD

my approach to furthering education

I. Why PhD?

1. I love my subjects. I love the interdisciplinary nature of computational biology and it's sister subjects and I can see myself in academia- constantly learning and researching and exploring. 2. Even on the off chance that if I don't pursue a career in academia, I think I need a PhD anyway? Most high level positions in the industry for life-sciences requires a level of expertise that only comes with a doctorate, and I think my career opportunities (+ growth) will be rather limited without it.

Considering these two points, a PhD would be most suitable for me.

———————

Now, choosing the right type of graduate program can always be challenging because there are so many ways to go about it, and I am a very indecisive person so this was especially difficult for me. Here is my approach

II. Factors I considered before taking my next steps

My Primary Short-Term Goal(s)

I opted for a B.Tech in Biotechnology after 12th grade, and it is through the course of this degree that I realized my interest in computational biology and bioinformatics. My undergrad focused on too many topics and often emphasized wet lab over dry lab, so although I'm graduating with a specialization in Medicinal and Computational Biology, I don't know nearly enough regarding the computational aspects Thus, my short-term goal is to expand my theoretical understanding of the important aspects of bioinformatics & computational biology.

2. Course Options that Work

Now, I know that I want to continue my education, I've got two options- Masters and PhD. When I considered my immediate goal against these two options, I realized four things: a. I'm not equipped with the required dry lab skills to dive headfirst into research. b. I don't know enough bioinformatics to commit to anything long term right now c. I'm looking for a course that feels like an extension of my undergrad d. I want to keep my options open and consider all career opportunities Given these three options (+ course-related expenses + my skill level), it made most sense for me to choose a MSc at the moment rather than a PhD.

3. How the Course Ties in to My Long Term Goals

As I mentioned, my long term goal is to do a PhD. However, my upcoming graduate course is actually an MSc by Coursework degree, which- unlike a Thesis program, focuses on skill development (especially industry related) rather than research. In fact, most Thesis Masters can be converted to a PhD, but my program does not have that option. At first glance, this course might seem like it's going against my long term goal but consider: - Industry related or not, I need to develop computational skills before I can pursue research - After this course I might prefer to gain work experience for a couple years before opting for a PhD. - My preferred uni(s) for PhD are different from my preferred uni for Masters. [^To give an example on the last point, for masters i considered countries/unis known for their quality of education + closer to my home country (this will be my first time living abroad alone) but for my PhD, I'm looking at countries/unis that are pioneers in research for my subjects of interest (even if they are a lot farther away from home)] So essentially, I'm relying on this course to give me the skills and knowledge I need for a PhD in the future, while also giving me a buffer to understand and align my future goals and plans. Jumping from this to a PhD would be a lot harder than from a Thesis Masters, but that's a risk I'm willing to take.

So yeah, this was the way I went about choosing both my short term and long term academic goals. I hope this provides a good starting point for you! Don't stress out too much about it though; the truth is that there is no right or wrong choice, whatever decision you make will warp around your intentions and work for you the way you want it to. Best of luck for your future endeavors!!! I'm sure it'll all work out <3

[ghost-in-the-hall]

The Anointing (Matthew Greywolf x Fem! Reader) SMUT

Hello hello this took way longer than I would have liked for me to finish, but, we made it! This is the second installment of The Sacrilege Series, and a request for some more Matthew smut from my dear friend @belnovacaine . This time reader is invited to participate in a ritual to help "alleviate some stress" by Father Matthew. But, reader's feelings are much deeper than a simple one night stand, will Matthew return her feelings?

WARNINGS: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, MDNI, 18+ CONTENT, misuse of religious practices/spaces, mutual feelings, confession, body worship kinda, use of anointing oils, fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, creampie, lots and lots of praise and pet name's from Matthew, I think that's everything if I missed any please let me know!

My Masterlist! ~ AO3 Link! ~ Tip Jar!

You just needed a break.

You had been running rampant trying to clean up all of Charles' new assistant's mistakes with their scheduling and paperwork. “I told her to call me if she had any questions,” you grumbled to yourself.

“I'm sorry,” Charles apologizes. “I hired her on Roel’s recommendation; I should've known better.” He sighs, leaning against the edge of the desk you were working at.

“Roel needs to stop being so concerned with trying to play matchmaker, especially when his recommendations don't have any clerical experience whatsoever.” You snap back in an annoyed tone.

“Well, isn't this a pleasant surprise?” Your scribbling pauses at the sound of an all-too-familiar voice, your grip tightening on your pen. Your heart pounding, you swallow thickly as his shadow stretches across the desk. “Charles is stealing you all for himself, hm?” he asks teasingly.

“Father Matthew, you sound awfully jealous.” You respond with a smirk.

He chuckles, shooting you a flirtatious grin. “Of course I'm jealous. My favorite girl is spending time with another man, my brother nonetheless, how scandalous.” You can't help but giggle as he winks at you. You return to your current task while Charles explains your predicament.

“So now, she's stuck cleaning up her mess before everything falls apart on us.” Charles chuckles, patting you on the back.

A finger is placed under your chin, Matthew gently tilting your face until your eyes can easily meet his. “That's a lot of work for one little rabbit.”

Your cheeks grew warm as his gaze held you firmly in place. “I can manage, don't worry,” you replied.

“After you finish here, I'd like you to come see me, alright?” His eyes slowly trail to your lips.

“Of course, Father. Can I ask why?” Your voice trembled slightly as you spoke.

“I need some help with a ritual,” he smiles sharply at you. “It's one I think you'll enjoy, especially after such a stressful day.” 

“I'll be there,” you grin coyly. “But you need to let me finish my work for that to happen,” you giggle.

“My apologies, Schwester.” He chuckles before straightening up. “I look forward to seeing you later.” 

Charles chuckles as his brother disappears down the hallway. “You're certainly in for a fun evening.”

“And how exactly do you know what he has planned?” Your heart thrums in your chest at Charles' amused expression.

“Matthew isn't a complicated man to read once you get to know him. He enjoys expensive alcohol, good quality cigars… and making the woman he's found himself enamored with completely melt in the palm of his hand.” He finishes with a chuckle. 

Your cheeks grow warm. "You really think Father Matthew is—” You cut yourself off as you shake your head. Never mind, I don't have time to worry about that now.” Charles smiles down at you, watching you scribble away at the paperwork in front of you.

Hours had passed, and you were still nowhere close to being done. You sat up straight in your chair, rolling your shoulders back with a groan as you stretched. You didn't understand how someone could make such a mess in a single day. You glanced up at the sound of heels quickly hurrying down the hallway. “I heard you got stuck with a pretty big mess.” She smiles.

“Claire, thank God.” You could have cried at the sight of her. She looked over the spread of paperwork in front of you, covered in red cross-outs and arrows, frantic notes written in the corners so you could somehow organize it.

“Wow, I knew Roel was bad at picking assistants, but this is impressive,” she laughs. She bumps you with her hip, pushing you out of your chair. “Get out of here; I'll handle the rest,” she winks.

“Claire, I can't let you—” she says, cutting you off by waving her hand at you.

“Nonsense, this is the first time Falk has taken a vacation in years; you deserve the time off, too. You've already been doing this for hours, so I can finish it. And besides,” she shoots you a devious smirk, “I heard someone is in for a nice little evening with Father Matthew.” You sucked in a sharp breath, not expecting her to bring that up so casually.

“How did you know about that?” You ask with a bashful chuckle.

“You have to call Attila’s office to schedule a time at the mensa,” she whispers in response.

“The mensa?” You ask in shock. She nods slowly, shooting you a knowing grin.

“That’s all I know,” she says in response to your confused expression, holding up her hands to show she was innocent. “But you probably shouldn't keep him waiting,” she smirks.

“I owe you for this.” You thank her as you gather your belongings.

“You can fill me in on your evening tonight over lunch, and we'll call it even; how's that?” She smiles.

“You got it.” You laugh in response before hurrying off to meet Father Matthew.

You knock tentatively against his door, hearing him quietly call you inside. He smiles at the sight of you, rising from his seat as he smoothes his shirt. “You came.” Your heart fluttered in your chest as you fidget nervously with your fingers.

“Of course I did. Do you really think I'd turn down an invitation to spend time with you?�� He chuckles, slowly walking around his desk to approach you. Your breath caught in your throat as your eyes met his, his finger slipping under your chin to hold you in place.

“I'm glad,” he smiles sharply down at you, “because I plan on taking up a lot of your time tonight, schwester.” Your knees felt weak, your mouth hanging open to speak, but no words managed to find their way out. He slips his hand into yours, studying you carefully. “Are you ready?” 

“As ready as I'll ever be.” You respond with a nervous giggle. The two of you strolled side by side through the darkening hallways of the Abbey, the late afternoon sun leaving the corridors burning in their warm orange light.

“I don't want you to be nervous,” he says suddenly, feeling the anxiety behind all your excitement. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

You shake your head, making him smile in response. “You're perfect; I just don't know what to expect.”

“I'll be right by your side through every step of the process, and we can stop at any time.” Your cheeks grow warm as his arm slides around your shoulders, pulling you into him slightly as you walk. “If anything, I should be the one who's nervous,” he admits with a chuckle.

“Oh yeah? And why’s that?” You prod curiously.

“I have to make sure I'm up to your standards.” He responds vaguely with a wink.

Father Matthew holds open the heavy door to the cathedral, allowing you to slip inside ahead of him. It was always a strange experience being in the chapel after hours. You could hear a pin drop in the silence; even your breathing seemed to echo off the room's impossibly high ceilings. You jumped as the door slammed shut behind you. Father Matthew stands at your side, offering you his arm as you begin your procession down the aisle. You pause at the altar's edge, Matthew looking down at you when he senses your hesitation. You look up at him with large doey eyes that could have easily brought him to his knees. “Is it really okay?”

His hand slips into yours, carefully bringing your knuckles to his lips. “I would be honored to have you standing beside me.” He moves on to the first step, waiting for you to decide to join him. You slowly set one foot on the white marble step, taking a deep breath before allowing the other to join. Matthew smiles down at you, delighted by your acceptance of his invitation. He takes a moment to study you as you stand in the middle of the altar: your much smaller hands in his, the way he could see your nerves begin to settle whenever your eyes met his; the sight brought a smile to his face. “Now, for the hard part…” he trails off with a playful smirk. “You're not allowed to lift a finger, understand? He slowly lowers himself to one knee, forcing you to look down at him. “Anything that you need, I will take care of.” Your heart hammered in your chest as your mind raced. The feeling of Matthew’s warm hand slipping into yours snapped you back to reality. His gentle smile and warm brown eyes immediately pushed down the nerves that were bubbling up in your stomach.

“Yes, Father.” Your eyes flickered around his features, everything about him only drawing you closer. Goosebumps erupt across your skin as his fingers trail down the outside of your leg. He places your hand on his shoulder, steadying you as he lifts your foot from the floor. He carefully undoes the buckle of your shoe, easing it off your foot before mirroring the process on your other leg. He stands, neatly placing your shoes to the side. The marble was cold under your feet; you touched your chest only to feel your heart racing under your palm. You let out a startled yelp as he suddenly scoops you in his arms. You can't help but giggle slightly, burying your face in the crook of his neck as he gently sways you with every step. He sets you on the edge of the mensa, one arm wrapping around your waist as his free hand cups your cheek. He presses his forehead to yours, gazing down at you longingly.

“Matthew?” You state his name softly.

“Yes, Engel?” He whispers, his lips brushing over yours as he speaks.

“Can,” you swallow thickly, your mouth growing dry as you work up the nerve to ask, “Can you kiss me?” He breathes out a soft chuckle.

“Funny, I was about to ask you something similar.” You share a coy smile as his lips carefully slot against yours. Your arms slide over his shoulders, tugging him closer as you memorize what it feels like to kiss him. He tasted faintly of sweet wine and tobacco, his calloused fingers rough against your skin as he slowly pushed up the hem of your dress. You whine softly as he parts from you, making him chuckle. “Patience, Engel. We can't get too far ahead of ourselves.” He presses a chaste kiss to your lips before separating from you entirely. He skillfully moved around the altar, grabbing everything he would need from memory. You inhaled deeply, making a pleased hum at the sweetly perfumed oil he set at your side. He drapes a deep maroon silk cloth over the mensa, your eyes fluttering shut as his lips capture yours. He cups your face carefully in his hands, his thumbs stroking over the peaks of your cheekbones. “Can I undress you, schwester?”

“Please do.” You respond breathlessly, making him chuckle. His hands squeeze around your thighs, your supple flesh dimpling under his fingertips. He slowly slides up your dress, the palms of his hands memorizing the feeling of your body's curves as he passes over them. You were so soft in his hands; watching goosebumps erupt at his touch was intoxicating. 

“Arms up.” He instructs, allowing him to ease the fabric over your head. He allows himself a moment to just drink in the sight of you, a sound akin to a territorial growl bubbling up in his throat. He takes your chin between his fingers, “So pretty, Schwester.” You shiver as his fingers trail down your neck. He smiles as he hesitates over your pulse, feeling how it thrummed under his touch before continuing on his path over your shoulder. He easily undoes the clasp of your bra, guiding the thin straps from your shoulders delicately as if you would shatter at the slightest wrong movement. You press your lips to his; you can feel Matthew smile as he melts into the kiss. His hands slide under the curve of your ass as he effortlessly lifts you from the mensa; your arms fling around his neck as the action causes you to let out a startled yelp that quickly dissolves into a flustered giggle. “Guess I need to remember my own strength.” He chuckles. He wraps an arm securely around you, holding you against him as he works the thin, delicate fabric of your lingerie down your legs. His hands felt hot against your bare skin, massive paws that engulfed the curve of your hips. You felt drunk off the euphoric buzz you were already experiencing, Matthews's attentiveness making your pulse race. He paused momentarily, taking hold of the glistening silk cloth, offering it to cover up while he finished setting it up. You instinctually lean into his muscular chest as he pulls you to him from behind, lips trailing up the sensitive skin of your neck before stopping just below your ear. His hand slides across your stomach, the silk cool against your otherwise bare body. “I'm going to take good care of you, Engel.” You shiver at the feeling of hot breath against the shell of your ear.

Your body jolts slightly as the first drop of oil splatters across your shoulder. The liquid was warm as it dripped down your skin. You let out a soft moan as Matthew’s strong fingers press into your aching muscles. “Good girl.” He whispers. You can't help but squeeze your legs together at his praise; you catch your lip between your teeth as you hear him chuckle, noticing the effect such a simple phrase had on you. He trails a finger across your jaw, turning your head to allow his lips to find yours. “Such a pretty thing you are, Engel.” You catch the sight of the triumphant smirk that had plastered itself across his features, reveling in the way you melted under his touch. Every compliment a praise for giving into your body's need for pleasure, Matthew simply couldn't get enough of the image of you. A sacred Madonna placed upon the altar, of which he was the only one bestowed with the grace of God to lay a finger on her. He vowed to care for you like the divine being you were. The way you arched into his touch, your sweet sounds gradually became louder and more fervent, making it hard to stay in control. He's snapped from his thoughts as you softly call his name, placing yourself on your knees before him. The hardwood of the mensa was hard under your body, your mind too clouded with arousal to acknowledge the discomfort. Matthew stared back at you with blown pupils, his eyes nearly black as he fought against his primal urge to take you right here and now. But he couldn't deny how gorgeous you looked presented before him. The deep red of the satin complimented your soft skin; it cascaded off your body like a crimson waterfall. Your hair is already slightly tousled; your cheeks flush with warmth.

“Schwester,” his husky voice echoes through the empty chapel. “Will you allow me to cleanse your body of sin and anoint you here before the eyes of God?”

“Yes, Father.” You cup his face in your hands, pulling his lips back to yours. Matthew's hands are on you in an instant, lifting you from the mensa with a growl as he guides your legs around his waist. He crushes your body against his, easily able to maneuver you until he has you lying how he wants against the cold wood.

“So beautiful.” He whispers sweet words of praise over you as he dedicates time to massaging each tender muscle. You can't help but let out a soft whine as his hands begin to trail up your thighs. He paused at the edge of the fabric that covered your body. He glances up at you, silently asking for permission to continue. You nod, giving him a soft smile. He leans over you, placing a soft kiss to your lips. “Remember, we can stop at any time, okay?”

You take his face in your hands, smiling softly as you study the sharp contours of his features. “I don't want you to stop.” You whisper against his lips. Matthew freezes, his heart pounding in his chest. The way you looked at him with such fondness, how gently your palms rested against his cheeks.

“I…” he swallowed thickly, warm brown eyes drinking in the sight of yours. “I’m in love with you.” He confesses, his voice trembling with nerves.

You breathe out a laugh, a smile instantly stretching across your features. “I love you too, Matthew.” You let out a delighted squeal as you feel his strong hands wrap around your hips, his lips crushing against yours as he pulls your body closer to his. You let your head fall back, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth as Matthew trails wet kisses down your neck. One of his hands slowly slid up the outside of your thigh before it dipped below the cloth that covered your body, trailing over the curve of your hip. He hikes your leg around his waist.

Your fingers tangle into his hair, a strangled gasp escaping you as you feel Matthew’s teeth bite down roughly on your neck. “Just relax, sweetheart; I'm going to take good care of you.” He coos, pressing one more kiss to your lips before letting the satin fall from your body to the floor. He whispers sweet words of praise in your ear as he slowly starts to tease your entrance with his fingers. You fist your hands in his shirt, gasping softly as you feel him ease his long, thick digits inside of you. Your back arches off the hardwood, Matthew’s warm palm immediately pressing into you for support. “I've got you, Engel.” Your mind was already clouded with pleasure; Matthew was an absolute expert in his craft, as he seemed to know exactly where to touch you to drive you insane.

You pull his lips to yours, kissing him feverishly as you hold onto him anywhere your hands could manage to reach. “Please,” you whine against his lips. “Need you.”

He chuckles softly, “My, my, what an impatient girl you are, schwester.” He cups your cheek as he presses another ferocious kiss to your lips. “But I’m happy to comply with such a pretty little thing.” He makes quick work of undoing his belt, haphazardly kicking off his pants as he pulls his shirt over his head. He moved with urgency, easily hoisting himself onto the mensa to pin your smaller form beneath him. His gaze rakes hungrily down your body, drinking in the sight of every curve. You squirmed, feeling your cheeks grow warm under his intense observance. “You are just so perfect, Mein Herz.” He cups your cheek in his hand, peppering your face with kisses as he eases himself inside of you. You cry out, your nails digging deep crescents into his biceps as you grab onto him. He hushes you, “You're doing so good, sweetheart.” He groans, cursing under his breath. You feel every inch of him push inside of you, stretching you to the point you were worried you might break. You whine, your thighs trembling when he finally settles his hips against yours. Matthew lets out a shuddering breath, another curse tumbling from his lips at how tightly you squeezed him. He buries his face into the crook of your neck; the feeling of his hot breath against your skin sends a delicious shiver up your spine.

You let out a loud moan as he slowly rolled his hips. Matthew let out a low growl at the melodic sound, repeating the action, smirking slightly as your loud moans echoed through the empty chapel. He gradually increased his pace, hitting a spot inside you that made your toes curl and the edges of your vision go white with every sharp thrust. “Fuck,” he curses gruffly. He sits himself on his knees, wrapping both hands around your hips. He manages to somehow push even deeper inside of you; you scream his name, Matthew groans at the sound. He grabs your face in his hand, making your eyes meet his. “So fucking pretty.” He growls. You groan as he pushes his thumb past your lips, greedily pulling the digit into your mouth with your tongue. “That's my girl.” He praises you with a smile. He picks up the bottle of oil, tipping it just enough to let a few drops of oil splatter across your stomach. He eases his thumb from your mouth, using his strong hands to massage oil over your bare skin. You weren't sure how much longer you would be able to last, every snap of Matthew's hips sending you closer and closer to the edge.

“Schwester,” Matthew growls, not slowing his pace. He could feel your body start to twitch in his hands, your body moving against his as you raced towards your climax. “Do you give yourself to me before the eyes of God?”

“Yes, Father.” You weren't sure how you managed to push the words past your lips, barely able to form a coherent thought let alone a sentence.

“Do you… fuck,” you both can't help but smile at each other, the seriousness of the ritual long pushed from your mind, completely absorbed in the fact that you were here with each other. “Do you wish to be absolved of your sins in exchange for pleasure?” He purrs, his tone only making the coil in your core wind tighter.

“Yes, Father.” He lets out a hum of approval. He dabs holy oil on his thumb, supporting himself in his forearm as he leans over you. You close your eyes, Matthew’s hand warm against your skin as he marks the sign of the cross on your forehead.

“I absolve you, Schwester.” He says with a sharp smile, his hips beginning to stutter as he struggles not to fall over the edge. His lips crash into yours, making you moan loudly into his mouth. You feel his hand slide down your torso; you cry out as his fingers begin to draw tight, quick circles on your clit.

You moan his name, “I'm close–” You’re cut off by another moan that he effortlessly rips from your lungs.

“Cum for me, Engel.” He whispers against your lips. You felt the pleasure building up inside of you until it finally snapped. You screamed his name, your nails clawing down his back, undoubtedly leaving deep red scratches in their wake. Matthew followed not long after, your name tumbling from his lips mixed with curses in both German and English as his hips stutter to a stop, his member pulsing against your sensitive walls as he releases himself inside of you. He drops his weight on top of you, making you groan. Both of your chests heaved as you struggled to catch your breath.

“You're in love with me, huh?” You smile, Matthew chuckles at your question.

“I am.” He props himself up enough to meet your eyes. “I hope that's not a problem.” He teases.

“I'm just trying to figure out why it took some fantastic sex ritual for you to confess that to me.” You laugh as he litters your face with kisses.

“You are incredibly beautiful,” he kisses your lips softly, “confessing to you through worship seemed like the only right way to tell you.” Your cheeks grow warm at his sweet words.

You carefully press your lips to his, “I'm in love with you too.” He smiles, cradling you in his arms.

“How about I get us cleaned up, and we head back to my room for some dinner.” He offers, gently tucking some hair behind your ear.

You can't help but smile in response, “I'd like that.”

Tag List: @spookyghostjelly @mossmothworld @obsessed-and-possessed @hinkepink @iamsarahsaysso (if you would like to be added or removed from the tag list please let me know!)

[thejockout]

Update: It's been a while!

Hey all. Been quite a bit since I've been active here; lot of life stuff going on that's contributed to that, but most of it's resolved now and I'm planning a pretty active return to the scene imminently. I've got some announcements on that front that I'll try to keep brief, but I think anyone who's enjoyed my content in the past will be happy to hear them.

First and foremost, I'm going to be returning to file-making soon (end of 2023 or early 2024) with regularly scheduled releases. (My precise schedule is TBD, but I'm aiming to be release either once weekly or once fortnightly depending on how much of a backlog I can create.) I've got ideas/concepts for 20 files written out atm which would amount to either 5 months of weekly releases/10 months of fortnightly releases once written and recorded. But obviously some of those ideas might not work so well in practice/I'll obviously come up with new ones along the way too, so that number's in flux. I'm going to try to write and record ten before launching any of them, so that I don't leave a huge gap between them again. But I think you guys'll like them, there's something for everyone in what I'm planning to make. There'll be content like what I've made before, but sfw and nsfw, attending a variety of kinks I'm into.

Included in these releases are going to be updated versions of my more popular, previous files. At the moment, the files I am planning to remake are Chill Out, Bro; Blink's Good Boy; All Pups are Good Pups; and The Bigger You Are. Some of these I want to remake for reasons of audio quality, but others I straight up want to rewrite portions of to bring them more up to my current standards. I've run out of space on Soundcloud and a premium account is expensive, so I'm racking my brain for a better storage alternative. At the moment, Soundgasm is an OK backup, but I'm also considering just straight up trying Youtube/Tumblr's own audio system/Patreon's audio system on a free basis to see if they work alright. Speaking of which...

To support this expanded venture, I'm also going to be opening a Patreon + selling specific, exclusive files either by subscription to said Patreon or via platforms like Gumroad and other appropriate audio file vendors. I don't plan for all my content to be locked behind a paywall, of course. I'm planning some kind of dual channel release system where I have a certain amount of files that will be free, and then others behind subscription. But for those who don't like the idea of monthly subs, I'll be putting my Patreon-exclusive files on a third party purchase platform like Gumroad, Ko-Fi, or another suitable alternative. I appreciate that all my files previously having been free will make this annoying to some, but I am flat baroque... and realistically, each file being 4-10 hours of work (dependent on complexity) means that I really want to be seeing SOME income from this if I'll be putting a lot of time in. That's why at current, the final announcement I'm making is that:

I am now taking commissions. I've done 3 commissions in total at this point and had been keeping quiet about it while I didn't know what I was doing with the Jockout account generally, but I am now available to write and record custom hypnosis files for listeners. I'm hesitant to provide a flat rate because the cost of a file usually does come down to its complexity/length, but somewhere in the ballpark of 50-80 dollars is what I'm currently valuing the time spent on a file at, unless you want something crazy simple or crazy complicated that'll price outside that range. I'm in a Euro territory, so 50 dollars amounts to about 4 hours of minimum wage work here, which is pretty low for the amount of time a good file takes; but I appreciate that high barriers to entry are going to put people off, and I feel that way myself when commissioning. You can DM me here if you want to discuss a commission idea.

All in all, I'm pretty excited with what I hope will be the future trajectory of my page. I'm having fun learning more about hypnosis/exploring new ideas in writing, and I hope you'll all enjoy the fruits of that too! 'Til next time :)

[oliversrarebooks]

Hello! I have just a teeny tiny amount of questions regarding blood.

*unrolls massive paper roll that spills on the ground and hits your feet*

Is there a list of possible blood grades? Is so, is triple A the highest highest one? That must mean Oliver really is the top shelf. Is the lowest grade low F?

Does a human's blood grade determine if they will be an erased thralll or a sentient one?

If so, what's the minimum grade for not getting erased, low B maybe? Is there also a minimum grade for edible blood? Is there blood so bad or digusting a vampire cannot digest it?

If the grade of the blood is not the sole factor, then what other factors are there? Natural strength? Natural level of obedience? Are there grades for that?

Human blood farms, what grade are the people there? Is there a certain point in the blood grade list that a human just cannot be sold to a farm because they're blood is too valuable? Do some vampires keep thralls as pets but not too drink from and have another thrall just for drinking.

Like let's say a human's blood is not exactly appetizing, but they are very cute (atleast in the eyes of a vampire) and docile or they have a really pleasing personality so they're kept around like a lap dog? (i'm thinking of Emily and betty, Emily is a low B, so she can't be that tasty, but I'm thinking Jessica keeps her around because she likes her looks and personality. Meanwhile I imagine Betty being a B plus or even a low A, but she's more like a blood source than pet)

Are there some magical foods that can gradually change the taste of human blood, like berries or some meats? Are they toxic to humans but vampires don't care? Let's say they do work, I imagine it would just be some superficial or even worse change? Kind of like, hmmmm... Trying to replicate the autentic taste of fresh vanilla from expensive vanilla beans, but using some 50 cent vanilla flavor you found at the dollar store

Or perhaps it's just a scam? "FEED YOUR THRALL THIS MAGICAL CLOUD FAIRY BERRY AND THEIR BLOOD WILL SKYROCKET 2 WHOLE GRADES OVER THE COURSE OF JUST 5 SHORT MONTHS!!"

You don't have to answer all these questions, answer as many as you like or none at all. You can also use these questions in your stort if you actually like them, tho i'd be very flattered.

This is all for now! But be assured, *I will come back.*

Oh wait! I do have one more question, what is Emily's word? (yk, like Oliver's is quiet, what's Emily's?)

Yay worldbuilding questions, I love them!

The blood grades are indeed triple A through F. Oliver and Fitz were both the top of the top shelf. F would be considered undrinkable.

There isn't a perfect correlation between blood grade and allowed sentience. At the auction house, humans with high quality blood are almost never erased, because erasure is difficult and time consuming to reverse. For the expensive merchandise, it's better to keep them sentient and then offer erasure as an option after purchase. This is why Jameson is complaining about the thralls, since all of the thralls that meet his criteria for blood quality are conditioned to be servants and pets. 

There's no minimum grade that will allow a human to escape possible erasure. If Jameson had bought Oliver, he would have paid for erasure after purchase. 

Minimum grade for edible blood depends on how picky or desperate the vampire in question is, but F grade generally refers to blood considered inedible. This usually happens when a human is diseased or poisoned.

There aren't official grades for other factors that can affect a thrall's price, especially since those tend to be largely subjective. Outside of the vampires who erase their humans fully, most vampires choose based on a variety of factors. You're right that Jessica chooses her thralls for looks as much as for blood quality. Many vampires keep more than one thrall, so it's common to have one for primarily drinking and another for primarily being a servant or pet.

There aren't really foods that can magically make a human's blood a higher grade, although you're probably right that scams like that would exist. The general prevailing wisdom among vampires is that fresh meat, vegetables and fruits are best for feeding your thrall. Seafood, spices, and other pungent foods are sometimes avoided, but this varies greatly from culture to culture.

I don't think every thrall gets a special word, I think Lily just does that to her favorites.

[thats-by-the-by]

"It's For Your Own Good."

This fic was crossposted on Ao3. Find it Here. Mind the tags.

"What are you going to do to me?" Jacob's voice is nearly silent as Roth leads him down an empty corridor, panicked actors fleeing from the pair. Roth keeps a hand on the small of his back, the other on the nape of his neck. A warning and a reassurance, packaged together.

"Don't worry about that, my Rook." Roth's voice is syrup in his ears, sending a shiver down his back. "You've caused a bit too much of a stir, and I'm going to correct that."

"I'm sorry." Jacob begs preemptively, gaining an appreciative hum from the older man. "I'm sorry, please don't-"

"Oh, we're well past the point where begging would save you." Roth says, leading Jacob down a flight of empty stairs.

Jacob's heart hammers in his chest as his body freezes without input, fear lacing his throat. Roth tuts impatiently, trying to push Jacob forward, but he doesn't move. He can't go back there. He can't go back into that cell, into that tiny room filled with the vast emptiness of the uncaring abyss. He can't- he won't go back there.

"Come now, Jacob." Roth sounds disapointed. "You knew what I would do if you made a scene. This is for your own good, my boy. Do you think I like when you hurt yourself? Do you think I enjoy hearing you scream and rave in there?"

"No." Jacob says. Of course he doesn't - Roth always holds him so tight after those days in the cell. Always bandages his hands and kisses his wounds until Jacob can't tell why they're stinging at all. He spares no expenses, the sweetest tea with the highest quality honey and milk straight from a farm. Of course Maxwell doesn't like it when Jacob forces him to punish him, no matter how wide he smiles or how gleeful his expression. "I'm sorry, I know you don't like this anymore than I do."

"My bird, I hate it more than you." Roth kisses the back of his throat with his teeth. "But you keep forcing my hand. The cell is unlocked. I'll return for you in twelve hours. Please don't be so dramatic this time."

Jacob nods, his eyes unseeing as he walks himself into the void, shutting and locking the door behind him. He can behave. He can be good. Roth loves him, right? This is for his own good.

[laurarolla]

The most annoying thing to me when it comes to talking about art and media is people saying that most of it is trash. No, most of it is average, which is why people are able to find emotional connections to stuff you don't connect with. Average things have highs and lows, and the right high at the right time is what often creates a fan. Of course, as we get older and we experience the same good elements in new forms that don't have much else for us to grab onto, we tend to find the experience less memorable, and the kneejerk reaction is to call it trash rather than acknowledge that we're just older now so it's not so novel anymore.

The reason this bothers me is that I see both thoughtful people who are passionate about art and folks who want artists to cater to their personal tastes at the expensive of everything else saying this crap. I just feel it's a better perspective to try and understand what people can see in something than to just let how you felt personally completely drive your assessment of its quality. I don't know, I'm just annoyed by people dismissing things without really thinking about why they are how they are.

[most-annoying-sponsorship]

Any submitted propaganda under the cut

Raycon - 10

God awful earbuds with 3 times the price of similar quality with the same script every god damn time at least allow creators to do something with it. Not an active scam product but they try so hard to market themselves like one and I don't understand.

1. It's been a while but at it's height, you couldn't get through a video without seeing someone shilling these subpar earbuds. 2. They're literally earbuds bought off of alieexpress with a fancy brand slapped over the top 3. They're garbage earbuds. DankPods did an excellent breakdown of why they're awful 4. Now everyone I know thinks Raycons are great despite them being as expensive or more so than actual established brands that work hard and take pride in their sound quality

I used them for a while actually but they just didn't work out for me so at this point I'm not going to start buying them again and I don't need to hear about it anymore

they’re everywhere. everyone i watch (which is a fairly diverse list) has a sponsorship. i also know zero people in my life who own them.

There are so much better earbuds that are also cheaper. Plus I don't wanna hear YouTubers awkwardly explain and show them being used, it's just dumb.

they wouldn't even stay in my ears plus the look like they go right up against your eardrums. red flags all around plus i hate wireless shit the battery lasts like two shakes at best

Cerebral - 1

Ok sorry this is gonna be an essay with some snark. So for some important background, at last report Cerebral is under investigation by both the DEA and DOJ for essentially being an online pill mill. This tech bro startup took advantage of a temporary measure meant to help patients keep their EXISTING prescriptions during the pandemic -- the usual rule is that controlled substances can only be prescribed after an in-person appointment, to avoid the exact kind of situation I'll describe, but of course when lockdowns made in-person appointments much harder then people who have been taking stimulants or w/e for years shouldn't be left hanging. But then, in comes the Cerebral tech bros who decide to build their new business off prescribing stimulants to NEW patients... to "95%" of new patients, to be exact, because one of them actually admitted "100% would be a pill mill". (Oh yes, 95% is much better, not just a malicious loophole at all /s) Basically, a patient would have a single 30-minute video appointment, take one quiz that's meant to be a SCREENING tool (not a diagnostic tool! if you get a high score that's an indication you need MORE testing to confirm a possible diagnosis!) and then immediately get prescribed stimulants with no physical exam (no EKG, heart rate, or blood pressure, just for starters that any RESPONSIBLE doctor would do) and no further questions asked.—

—That would have been bad enough, but the advertising and shilling. Oh god, the advertising and shilling. Cerebral put out ads deliberately overstretching "signs you may have ADHD" in such a way that would put Tiktok influencers to shame (and we'll fucking get to that.) Like one ad implying that overeating sweets, something that literally everyone does at one point or another, is a sign you should make an appointment with Cerebral to get that sweet sweet Addy! And as for the real treat, the actual sponsorships. They had a fucking AFFILIATE CODE PROGRAM. Tiktokers would be like "use my code to get $30 off your first month!" for PSYCHIATRY. Not only that, but for psychiatry prescribing stimulants which are addictive and can kill you if you're not being carefully monitored for heart problems. Tiktokers and ads would also describe this service as a "life hack" and emphasize how easy it is to get stimulants through this one neat trick! Medical ethics is dead and we killed it. It got to the point that major pharmacies like CVS and Walgreens started refusing to fill prescriptions originating from Cerebral, because if/when a pill mill gets busted, pharmacies that filled the prescriptions can also be held liable. Think of the opioid epidemic for examples of the situation they were trying to avoid. They noticed how suspicious it was that ALL THE SUDDEN there was a huge flood of prescriptions for addictive drugs, ALL originating from the same few healthcare providers (mostly Nurse Practitioners rather than Medical Doctors, because MDs were more likely to call out the ethical/legal violations, but even many of the NPs who worked for Cerebral described feeling pressured by the corporate higher-ups to increase prescriptions and discourage waiting or further testing) Once this all came to a head Cerebral tried damage control by no longer prescribing stimulants to new patients. I haven't heard any updates on the regulatory investigations since then. But you know what I haven't seen that's even more telling? Not one, not a SINGLE one of the content creators who shilled for this company EVER apologized. For all they know they could have contributed to getting someone killed, not to mention life-ruining addictions, all for that sweet corporate sponsorship cash. Even if you argue they might not have known better at the time (to which I say bullshit, it's your responsibility to at least google the company to see if there's any red flags, Cerebral had more than a communist parade) even AFTER all this started making national news, it was just dead silence and moving on to the next corporate sponsor. But hey, if you're struggling with Adderall addiction, I know just the thing to help! Sign up for BetterHelp using code "SHILL" to get $10 off- *dies*

[theygender]

The OP was made in 2018 back when agave was The Big Thing and demand was quickly outstripping supply, so I imagine that's why they're talking about agave specifically

When it comes to sheep though, modern sheep will die from flystrike without human intervention. Due to crossbreeding with merino rams in the 19th century, modern sheep now produce more wool at the expense of having a higher amount of grease weight, which is what attracts flies and leads to flystrike. Once a sheep is infected, flystrike leads to death by ammonia poisoning within 3-6 days

Of course human breeding practices are what led to this and we can talk about how unethical it was as much as we want to, but it doesn't change the fact that it already happened, and at this point I feel that it would be unethical to leave sheep to die painful deaths because of a problem that we created. The breeding practices that led to this problem all occurred in the 1800s, before we had the advanced knowledge about genetics and artificial selection that we do today. Modern breeding practices are focusing on fixing the problem by breeding sheep to naturally have wrinkle- and wool-free rear ends to prevent flystrike from occurring. (All of this info is in the article I linked, but I'll post screenshots of the relevant paragraphs below if you're understandably concerned about seeing the mulesed lambs in the picture I warned about)

I'm against the practices that occur in wide-scale factory farming and I agree that a lot of the breeding practices that led us here have been unethical, like the way that some meat chickens have been bred to put on so much weight that they literally can't survive for their full natural lifespan. But when it comes to sheep specifically, there are still ways for us to fix the mess we've made and get them back their quality of life, and that seems like a better option to me than leaving them to suffer

Screenshots of the sections talking about how the flystrike problem came about and how selective breeding is being used to try and fix it below the cut. (Additional warning though, the article does—by necessity—talk about what flystrike is while talking about how it came about, and it's not a pleasant disease. Skip the third/last paragraph in the first screenshot if you're squeamish)

Vegans of tumblr, listen up. Harvesting agave in the quantities required so you dont have to eat honey is killing mexican long-nosed bats. They feed off the nectar and pollinate the plants. They need the agave. You want to help the environment? Go back to honey. Your liver and thyroid will thank you, as well. Agave is 90% fructose, which can cause a host of issues. Bye.

[spearkarrier]

So on Disney...

I was born and raised in Florida, and #Disney is coming to my hometown and laying flat things that once were conserved by nature laws. Disney has always overshadowed my life. Disney is like a giant looming over you, but you don't completely notice until one day you open your eyes, look up and realize "there's this thing and it has control of parts of your life". I've seen Disney shut down a daycare because they had a character on the wall without paying for licensing. (Why not remove the character? Yeah I know. S'not the point. There was no litigation. It was just shut down. Imagine being a low income parent losing your job because suddenly you had no childcare thanks to Disney. As I've lost a job because of a petty person quitting on me literally in the morning I had to go to work, I can tell you it's devastating.) I myself have had items I make removed because they MIGHT be inspired by the big corporate owned things. Videos copyright struck because, even though the song was public domain, I sang it too well or something. I dunno. So #DeSantis taking away Disney's right to be a sovereign nation in my hometown? You better fucking believe I cheered that on. THEY ARE NOT A POLITICAL ENTITY. THEY ARE A BUSINESS but somehow get more rights then you and I? Disney clapping back? Of course they would. DeSantis clapping back at the clap back? Of course it would happen. This is the action more and more people have been shouting to see: some actual movement towards good changes instead of bitch bitch bitch. No one has won against Disney? At least he's gonna try.

Do you want to know what's fascist? LIVING UNDER A CORPORATE THUMB, BEING TOLD WHAT YOU CAN AND CANNOT SAY, DO, SING, ETC BY BIG TECH. Like Disney. And others. I know because I've always lived in fear of the echoes, and even watched my family fight for our land. I don't understand people who claim to hate fascism gloat and cheer that Disney is going to squash a guy who is standing up against one of the many elements of fascism - that btw was doing it as part of a tax-free ride. Things are a bit more expensive here in Florida - but we don't pay income tax and even have free healthcare (or at least we used to. Grew up on free healthcare. I gotta check to see if that fact still stands.) So making that multi-million corporation pay their fair share? #HELLFUCKINGYES

I like some Disney stuff - the Buzz Lightyear movie was a snore but anyway - but if I can't live here tax free why should this corporation get to do it... and influence the laws that dictate how I live? I don't care if you like him. I don't care if you think he's a twit. That isn't the issue, and it's childish to pretend it is. The issue is that corporations in America were given the same rights as real citizens, and they've been using that (and propaganda) to shape the quality of our lives for the worse for at least a generation if not two. Repeal the laws that give them immunity and see how quickly things change. Vote with your feet while you can. Repeal the laws that don't allow you to. The law has been used against us. I noticed it when I was 12. I don't know why some of you adults can't see it now. #fuckthecorporaterule Also, quit coming to my state. Y'all have the housing here so high I can't buy a home even with preapprovement. Go somewhere else or I'm going to sic the queen of gators on you.

[the-firebird69]

COMPANY

We're going to go ahead and take over this company they're not doing anything with it and we'd have the name and we would also take over all the factories of course and change the parts and everything but the configuration is not bad and we're going to make it look the same almost exactly the motors are not actually that bad either she's like 30 horsepower thanks go like 200 mph which is fast enough I just have a few quality issues as a matter of fact we might change just a few quality issues as he says and make it workable bike and it's too expensive for a Chinese bike they're way too pricey and will drop the prices and start selling them as a standard bike there's only a few over there as dong fang and a couple of the companies and we took them over well we didn't take over time and we didnt take over the other company. This company is perfect it's John remillard and will take it over and blow his people out and they'll try and spy on us and we'll sell tons of bikes and we'll make the river go the other way. They said they're going to block us and Uriel and got his wife say you won't and we're going to take it over tonight and we're going to revamp the bike and her son says the way I did and it's something to think about and said there's all these parts places we only want to make a few parts ourselves and it's important because we will have to figure out what to do about them and he agrees

Thor Freya

My son is trying to find an electric motorcycle and can't it's ridiculous it's a money maker they're easy to make big part of the problem is the battery nobody wants these idiots with lithium and the new battery is coming out and it's going to change it eventually it's a good idea cuz it won't cost him any money and he doesn't have any money but we can take over this company and we're going to make the bike better there's a couple engine components that are not good there's a few components on the bike that are not good but most of it's okay the frame is not bad it might reinforce it a little or ask them to other than that it works and we're going to take it over tonight and start making it and we might go with the Chinese name not Vogue it sounds stupid and everybody knows the Chinese name those might be a model but really it's probably one that would attract Lady Gaga or something with a bunch of gold fairings and things so we're going to go ahead with it and our son said the last part and daughter and we reiterated it does it means what we're saying too but wow what a good idea I'm going to take this over and start selling them there and we're going to sell them adoles lesser prices on thing which is about 5,000 US dollars for 600cc bike which is reasonable but for China is too expensive you can sell it for 4,000 US dollars or even less $3,500 or 3,000 we're going to think of the introductory price you can always go up or down if we don't cut them down all the parts those tractor attention and we need to now and he says to try it might as well and you can sell it overseas for lesser and the electric bike too I'm looking forward to this I was going to try and do it and put gears on it too it's a great idea and I'm going to do it now and he's offering help and we're going to take that

Uriel and goddess wife

We're going with him I'm going to do the job right and we're going to make sure it's done right but really they always do it right but your son and daughter-in-law are chomping at the bit and they've got a team ready and they're going in but you asked us to go with him and he wonders why but he sees it we're a team and you're not going to go alone we're going to be there with you he appreciates it

Frank Castle hardcastle

This is how it goes he's hot and stupid stuff coming out nearby but it doesn't usually sound like way but we are going to help out and this is a great idea I'm going to try and make the Chinese bike here the electric bike and he can get one and have gears on it and it would be a reasonably priced by the time it comes around you'll have money

Frank Castle hardcastle because like $10,000 he can spend $3,500 or 3,000 on it and ride around and will sell tons of it all over the world and it'll be the safe battery and I'll be there 15 minute charge and probably go 200 miles an hour but we'll get him like a touring bike or he likes the ones that are like part sport bike it looks like a small breakout it sounds good

[crimsononiarataki]

He loved talking about his adopted son and that would be obvious from his expression, and the look in his eyes. The younger Yokai was someone he clearly held dear. While yes, most people may have tried to drop him with the other Kitsune known, namely the Guuji, he'd never even thought about it. Not once.

"Well, in the beginnin' it wasn't really stable... but I told ya all about the time the Gang and I were homeless, livin' in a tent we had to repair far more often than not. Kohaku was there with us, he helped the boys gather root vegetables, sweet flowers, and mint every now and then. He's a good kid,"

He listened as Ayato went into talking about how he would react if he were ever in the position to consider the Oni as a partner, the mere concept, or rather, the THOUGHTS therein - made the larger male red once more. The fact that someone he cared about, far more than as a friend, was saying things like that somewhat casually, even? It flustered the taller male more than the mere touches had. He had no reason to hide or disguise his reaction though. Because it wasn't a bad one.

"Ah... yeah I get that, but we both know I'd never land on the list of 'approved' people for ya, Ayato. I appreciate your honestly though, I ain't... a woman and I'm pretty sure the Elders wouldn't even give me a second glance because of that reason alone."

He was aware of the Elders trying to find a match for Ayato, every one of them as far as he was aware had been women. Two men couldn't have children together, after all, now, thee were likely other means for a same-gender couple having children who would be blood related to one of them. Of course, marriage was something Ayato was expected to do, that didn't mean the other would. He just had to hope the other was able to find someone who made him happy and kept him that way. He was all but certain that he stood no chance. Which was why he was trying so hard to keep his feelings in check.

"An honor, huh? I dunno if anyone else would view it that way, but thank ya for that. It... means a lot comin' from someone I respect as much as I respect ya, Ayato. Knowin' how ya feel about me bein' well... a dad, it's nice."

He did feel that there was more than a little thing hidden within the other male's words there, but he didn't want to dwell on it. He'd already come to terms with being the furthest thing from 'good for Ayato' in a romantic sense. In that way, he was friend zoning himself, as long as the other was capable of being happy with whoever he wound up with, the Oni would be happy for him. His friend deserved that after all the hard work he put in. However, he'd want Ayato to actually be happy and not just putting on a front. So he hoped that whoever the other picked was someone who made and kept him truly happy.

"Sumeru city has a little coffee shop that sells chocolate, I think. I was only in the city briefly so I dunno for sure."

He'd done a bit of traveling, the other man knew he had, too. There was always Port Ormos, there was an array of things there. As well as places to get drinks and food. Though he felt the main city might be a better option for chocolate. Especially if the other was wanting only the finest quality to give to Kohaku. Man, the kid was going to love Ayato for the various chocolate alone.

"If ya can't get into contact with Master Diluc, I could. I gave him one of the little things I make for friends - uh, long story there, but I could send Ushi to visit him wherever he is with a letter, and probably some Mora to cover the expenses if it's needed."

At this point, it seemed like Ayato was going to get Kohaku chocolate from each nation, which would make the Kitsune quite happy. Of course, he'd be happy with some truffles or something like that too. When it came to chocolate as long as it wasn't bitter the younger male loved it. Ayato wanting to bond with his son made his chest warm, it was a nice feeling, knowing that the other wasn't viewing him any differently despite him having an adopted son.

It wasn't so much that he was oblivious to the other male's affections, far from it, actually, he just wasn't reading INTO those soft actions. The touches, the lingering gazes, those things? He was just trying to keep himself where he felt he belonged. As a friend. He knew how he felt already, he'd known for some time, but he wasn't the right fit. Not the right... person. He didn't consider himself a person at all. Something even Shinobu could attest to. It was probably a good thing people were paying no attention to the Oni and the Commissioner by the snack table at the moment. Given the way they may be looking at one another and all that.

"Ya know, all this talk about how ya wouldn't hesitate despite me havin' a son, it's nice. Ayato, I appreciate ya bein' honest with me."

He'd let the words sink in before taking a bite out of one of the sweet treats he'd taught Thoma how to make, they were a fairly delicate sweet too, flakey, buttery, and they were filled with custard, chocolate, or fruit jam. Sprinkled with just a bit of finishing sugar too. HIs eyes would seemingly sparkle in the light. As if saying 'I know.' without actually vocalizing it at all.

Ayato smiled, watching Itto’s earnest expression, his eyes shining with pride as he spoke about Kohaku. The Oni had a way of telling stories that made Ayato feel the weight of his words — not in a burdensome sense, but in a way that felt grounding. The love Itto had for Kohaku was undeniable, and Ayato couldn't help but admire the strength and warmth that emanated from him.

“You know, Itto," Ayato began, voice softer than usual, "I don’t think you give yourself enough credit. The way you’ve taken care of Kohaku, the way you talk about him—it’s clear you’ve given him something far more valuable than anyone else ever could: stability, love, and a family. Those things matter far more than blood, and honestly, if it were me… if I were ever in the position to consider you as a partner, I wouldn’t hesitate for a second because you have a child.” He could not be any more obvious than this, could he? He wondered if the Oni would pick that up. But for now, he went along with the conversation. His gaze softened as he looked directly into Itto's eyes, his voice carrying sincerity with every word. "In fact, I’d consider it an honor to be a part of that kind of life. And I wouldn’t have it any other way."

He let that statement hang in the air for a moment, his eyes lingering on Itto’s for just a little longer than usual. Ayato wasn't one to mince words when it came to something this important, and while he hadn’t explicitly revealed his feelings yet, he wanted Itto to understand that there was no room for doubt about his respect—or admiration, for that matter.

Then, with his characteristic wit, Ayato shifted back to a lighter tone. "As for the chocolate… well, if it wins me points with Kohaku, I’ll be sure to bring the finest. I suppose we could have Fontaine, Liyue, and Mondstadt covered. Sumeru, perhaps, if I can track something down." He chuckled lightly. "From Mondstadt, I could as Master Diluc for some too. He's been kind to us in the past."

Itto’s laughter in response was warm, a sound Ayato always found himself fond of. The Oni had such a big presence, yet there was a gentleness to him that others might easily overlook. But Ayato? He saw it. He saw the way Itto treated the people around him, especially those he cared for.

As the conversation continued and they joked about Kohaku’s antics, climbing onto iceboxes and curling up in odd places, Ayato found himself thinking, When will he realize? Itto’s openness and earnestness were endearing, but somehow, the Oni seemed completely oblivious to the signs Ayato had been giving him for some time now. The touches, the lingering looks, the way Ayato made time for him despite the busyness of his own life—it was all so clear to anyone else who might’ve been paying attention. But Itto… well, Ayato supposed Itto's focus had always been on caring for others.

One day, Ayato thought to himself, smiling slightly, when Itto finally realizes, wouldn’t that be something?

[megamanrequests]

Well guess what, your FACE is really cool...thank you. //////

And hey, of course you could! Have a couple boys.

I swear, you let him win ONE game of Mario Kart 64 and he’ll never shut up again.

I hope it’s to your liking! Thanks for dropping by.

(You know, now that I think about it, there’s a chance you meant this in a ship sense. If that’s true, tell me. I’d be happy to do a different thing.)