#Obviously it ended up being false
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2024 reads / storygraph
The Loudest Silence
YA contemporary
a newly Deaf-Hard of hearing girl moves across the country and starts a new school, struggling with navigating her disability and love for singing and lost friendships - determined to not make any new friends for the year she’s in Florida
and a boy struggling with family expectations and anxiety, after being made the fútbal captain even though he secretly ways to be on broadway, who quickly befriends her
bi & aroace-coded MCs
#The Loudest Silence#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#hm this was okay! it’s a sweet and light YA contemporary focusing on friendship and disability.#It’s a little cheesy; and I liked the immediate easy friendship (well; after a few false starts) and how welcoming Hayden's#friend group/family were. I like how they all jumped to learning/practicing ASL.#I liked how Casey was dealing with her newfound Deafness with a lot of positivity - the main frustrations being how other people treat her#but there’s also the underlying isolation and grief. At the same time it didn't go as deep as it could have with that?#The friendship is central to the story - but honestly I feel like Casey and Hayden’s relationship doesn’t develop past ‘they’re friends now#[continues other subplots] - it ends up being a bit telling not showing their friendship. And then she gets a love interest.#I feel like if you’re centering your book on being a platonic love story - rare in YA! - giving one a love interest kinda goes against#what’s supposed to be unique about it? Like it wasn’t overwhelming and I thought it was sweet actually; I just didn’t come here for that.#I always find it a little odd when YA contemporary books don’t explicitly name their aroace characters as aroace -#obviously I prefer an exploration of experiences to just using the word and nothing else; but in this genre; why not both?#considering various other identity labels are used and discussed there were various points where it felt like it was walking circles#around where it would be obvious to say “no I’m aroace” lmao?#And there’s a point where Casey mentions seeing an ace sticker on his guitar - the only reason it wasn’t an aroace sticker is bc#that would have ruined the minor subplot of her assuming he’s gay/dating his other friend. It felt like a slightly odd way to mention it?#but also I guess I appreciate it being evident throughout but also being a non-issue plot wise - while there’s a couple of moments#of people making romantic assumptions about them;for the most part it’s just treated normally for a boy & girl to be friends (as it should!#It does get points for mentioning people watching by conan grey LMAO (not that it really explores him feeling that way specifically;#but I mean same lol)#Overall plot-wise - there were kind of a lot of things going on and it petered out a bit? I wanted some more depth in some areas.#Also I feel like some of the references seemed out of date for current teens haha.#i do love the love for unusual pets (hairless cat and iguana)#aroace books#bisexual books
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So Ang aka Recapkid aka Handsome Hugs aka whatever the fuck they calling themselves now* poisoning the discourse while doing exactly in rl what his art portrayed (allegedly) is why we don't get to have nice shit in ZADR fandom anymore, huh.
*My knowledge of Rek/Recapkid saga ended initially when they first made their first dramatic exit in fandom. Everything after is what I had to track down to verify tonight.
#there'll always be wolves among the sheep and obviously fuck your fandom if it hurts people yada yada#idk what to believe but it is apparent something is not right with ang beyond drawing sick cartoons#i've seen them get harassed and bullied years ago and they were toted as a fandom martyr#but i don't have a reason anymore to think the alleged abuse accusations about them is false anymore#and perhaps their victims did retaliate in such a way to ruin their life and have them lose their job health insurence#but by not taking the end of life care and persist to taunt them and play victim ang has made their case look worse and indefensible#that no matter how you slice it no matter what ang has went through and what they did or didn't do to these people they created bad optics#i predict we're going to get another monster ballooned into a bigger monster here and no apology or accountability#this person is like if chris chan had gotten nearly as far as john k. in terms of legitimacy and cult of personality#i'm not being glib if the full story is true#they were exposed time after time but kept muddying the waters like an abuser does by calling their victims the abusers#and people eat it up as lies spread around the world before the truth can put its shoes on#and then leave truth freezing in the rain when it's already not welcomed as lies makes itself at home with your hot cocoa and blanket#i was never invested in rek as i knew od rhen as a person like i saw so many in fandom were#but i see what looks like a bullying campaign and condemned that#but now i have to question if they staged the bullying and exit for sympathy points to fit a narrative#because no former child turned adult would doggedly follow around their abuser from account to account#because they stumbled upon or hacked their adult account and were traumatized to vengeance and decided they need to ruin lives#no it is because ang or rek or whatever couldn't fucking disappear for real and stop bothering these people and prey upon some new ones#again allegedly and just my opinion#idk the real facts than the they said she said of it all
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any more thoughts on puppy art.. please. only if u want to though haha !! (please?)
ohh u guys love your darling little lapdog huh?
LAPDOG ART DONALDSON! fem!reader
▸ a drooler. nosing his head between your legs n he's already salivating. he's so cute like that. face smushed between your thighs, panting as spit pools in his mouth, nose twitching like a cute little bunny at the scent of your arousal. taking the trim of your panties between his teeth, dragging it down inch by inch. quivering because he just wants to rip them off but the last time he did that he tore your nice lacy lingerie and u didnt touch him for a week. when he eats you out he laps at your cunt like an eager puppy. comes away absolutely glistening. dripping, even. your juices n his saliva smearing his cheeks, his nose, dribbling down his chin.
▸ bigggg on humping. obviously. when you're too busy to give him attention he'll just shuffle over onto your lap and just start rubbing up against you. he's ridden out the best orgasms that way; creaming in his already-sodden boxers as slick gets all over ur thigh. he likes to do it when you're working or when you're on a call (you always punish him best that way). oftentimes you'll wake up at night to slick sheets—finding him grindin up against you, moaning and whimpering. a sleepy, boneless mess on your knee. he'll already have gotten himself off thrice before he tries to wakes you, just to be safe (you might take it away from him, after all). ▸ teething.... grown ass man teething... gnawing on your shoulder to stop himself from crying out when you let him fuck you.. nibbling your bottom lip red n raw when you kiss.. slobbering all over your mouth. during sex if you tease him he'll start to chew anxiously at the end of ur bra strap, the hem of your shorts, your panties if you keep him waiting too long. sometimes randomly takes your hand by the wrist and takes a fake chomp out of it (affectionate).
▸ not beyond jus being your lil stress relief toy. coming back home and he's been so good for you. he won his match. he's cooked dinner. but you don't have time for any of that. "oh, baby, don't give me that look. cock out, now." and he makes a little mewling noise and immediately his shorts are a crumpled puddle on the floor—raging boner popping out, all swollen n red n leaking bc hes been waiting for you for hours. ▸ sighing, telling him to sit and so he does. legs spreading wide on the couch, blinking up at u in earnest neediness. and when you sink onto his cock he makes this insane, visceral whining noise—back arcing off the seat. ▸ cockwarmer? more like cuntwarmer. you tell him don't move and don't cum. an impossible ask. he's pawing at your back, whimpering when your only response is to lean back heavier, sinking your full weight down on his poor, poor cock. n it feels soso good but he only lasts two minutes on a good day! let alone when you're switching the tv on and settling back into him like he's part of the couch. occasionally your hips jump, walls pulsing tight, choking his sensitive dick. you're grinding down into his lap and he's twitching inside of u and hot tears are prickling his eyes—fingers digging into your thighs, trembling.
▸ time ticking on.. the coil of heat in his gut winding tighter n tighter.. art's cheeks are flushed and hes wetting the back of your shirt with his silent tears. he persists, though, because he's good. he's gonna be a good boy for you. and it works! for a time, when you seem like you've almost forgotten your pussy is strangling his cock and you're only rolling your hips occasionally, sending warm thrums of pleasure through him. lulling him into a false sense of security.
▸ until all of a sudden you decide to be mean and for whatever reason you lift your hips before slamming them back down again, and his sharp gasp and slurred mewls perfectly cue the geyser that erupts from his slit.
▸ not even letting him cum inside you.. sliding off his spurting cock thats blowing cum like a volcano. hot, sticky strings arcing in the air and splattering all over the carpet, the couch cushions. his eyes glazing over, all glassy n sparkly as he crumples back in the couch, blubbering tearful apologies as his cock leaks like a faucet, staining the poor, new pillows.
▸ adores aftercare. or just your comfort in general. please rest your hand against his cheek and let him sigh and melt and nuzzle into the palm of your hand like you're taking the weight of the world off his shoulders. tug gently on his hair. scratch his scalp. let him curl up on your lap and pat him and coo sweet nothings in his ear. simple things, like "sweet baby, did so good today." or "tired puppy. took mommy so well."
▸ "fuck— m'sorry. m'sorry, m'sorry—" "hey, shh, darling. aw, don't cry. mommy's got you. how bout you curl up on momma's lap, kay?" "..mkay."
#kinda got away from me.. oh well.#yam's favs#yameoto#inbox !#(╯°^°)╯head💣canons#૮ smut🔞#art donaldson#art donaldson x reader#art donaldson x you#art donaldson smut#challengers#art challengers#art donaldson fic#art donaldson fanfic#art donaldson fanfiction#challengers x reader#challengers x you#challengers smut#mike faist x reader#mike faist#challengers movie#art donaldson x female reader
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bf!suna who has an album of you filled with pics and the often stupid videos he takes when he’s feeling silly with you.
bf!suna who has a video of him standing behind you whilst you’re reading a book on the couch and his hand is in the video, faking a jerking off motion to you til you notice and then he releases his hand like he just finished.
bf!suna who has a video of you sleeping where your shirt has ridden up that your boobs are so close, if you stir in your sleep again they’ll, for sure, pop out. and in the video is another stupid clip of his hand, shaking madly while he gently (and reluctantly) pulls your shirt down, hand still shaking like it’s the hardest thing to do.
bf!suna who has another video of you sleeping and he’s just poking your cheeks softly, occasionally pinching them as well.
bf!suna who has a video of him creeping up behind you while you’re doing the dishes and he proceeds to cup your ass while bouncing it in his hand “hey everyone, back with another, this time featuring my girlfriends ass—with a review!” You obviously proceeded to wet him with the dirty sink water (he’s done this before, many, many times.)
bf!suna who has a video of you drunk and crying to the ending of coco while clinging to his side. his lips are pursed together while he’s giving you the nastiest yet nonchalant side eye, nodding once and a while to your complains, “this boys family is a menace Rin! Can you believe that?”
bf!suna who has a video of you squashed to his chest because your shirt is off out of annoyance to the heat of summer. You were bathing in the new chill of having no shirt that you didn’t notice he’s taking a video of him cheering silently while your side boob and his side of his chest are in view, mf is cheering like a teenage boy.
bf!suna who has a video of him randomly coming up to you and pressing your foreheads together while he opens his mouth wide in a funny way. You’re grimacing and he’s just in a silly mood to mess with you.
bf!suna who has a video of you walking from the water in your bathing suit, it flips back to him who falsely claims he’s been shot through his actions, “I’ve been shot by sexiness, someone help me,” it cuts after he pretends he’s dead on the sun-chair.
bf!suna who has a video of him after he’s done being your professional photographer. He pretends he’s taking more, going around you while you laugh, “look here, baby, yes! perfect! one more ms. Suna! Give me fierce!” Completely doesn’t care about the public walking past.
bf!suna who has a video of him pretending to be a YouTuber again. He has a cute headband on and a pink face mask on along with you who is busy doing a lip mask,
“hey everybody, welcome back! Today I am venturing into a women’s skin care,” you punched him in the chest playfully, “excuse you, i’m not just a women, thank you very much,”
he chuckled, “right, everyone, this is my beautiful, sexy, caring, and perfect girlfriend #soon-to-be-wife.” (he whispered that to the camera, hoping the songs playing on your speaker was loud enough.)
And finally, bf!suna who has a video of you crying while laughing after he just proposed, your quite literally balling and this mf is just smiling while cradling you to his side, “#soon-to-be-wife !”
bf!suna who just loves those videos so much (and taking more) that he hopes his storage doesn’t run out soon because he’s on his last storage plan.
#haikyuu x reader#suna rintaro fluff#suna rintarō#haikyuu#haikyuu suna#suna x reader#suna headcanons#suna x you#suna x y/n#rosiesroseas
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Screening: Rosemary's Baby (1968)
Pairing: Yandere!Ieiri Shoko x Reader (JJK).
Runtime: 3.2k.
TW: Fem!Reader, Non/Con (False Pretenses), Mentions of Pregnancy, Cheating (Reader is in an Established Relationship With Gojo), Fingering, Medical Malpractice, Manipulation, and Overstimulation. Dead Dove: Do Not Eat.
The examination table was cold as ice against your back.
She’d been nice enough to put down a sheet of sterilizing parchment, but not much more. You fidgeted with the hem of your skirt as you waited, too nervous to check your phone and risk seeing the newest addition to Satoru’s never-ending barrage of texts, too obedient to do anything other than stay where you were and stare blankly at the chipped, white tiles of her ceiling. That was what she told you to do – or, at least, what you thought she’d told you to do. It’d been difficult to understand her through her surgical mask, only pulled down slightly to accommodate the cigarette she was holding up to her lips, and come to think if it, she might’ve just meant to wait near the table, not strictly on—
The door opened, creating a break in the silence just long enough for you to pull yourself back together, and you bolted upright before your thoughts could start to slip, again – the stiff parchment crackling in protest underneath you. Your eyes found Shoko just as she slipped inside, letting the door fall shut on its own behind her.
Out of all of Satoru’s friends, Shoko had always been your favorite. There was obviously the gender bias (you’d be lying if you said you wouldn’t have gravitated towards any woman in Satoru’s overall civil, but absolutely male-dominated social sphere), but even if that hadn’t been the case, you liked to think that you would’ve gotten along with Shoko, regardless. She was always so calm, always so level-headed, rarely smiling but slow to lose her temper, too. Being around her made you feel a little less like the awkward, oblivious non-sorcerer who’d stumbled into a world you still didn’t completely understand and a little more like someone who knew what they’d gotten into and who to rely on, when your own limited abilities fell short. You trusted Shoko, even if you’d only talked to her alone a handful of times. If you didn’t, you never would’ve come to her for something like this.
She stopped at the nearest counter, retrieving a pair of latex gloves from a nearly empty container, before coming to stand next to your table. You knew she’d been smoking, but the heavy scent of disinfect and rubbing alcohol smothered any traces of lingering smoke there might’ve been. You were thankful. You’d been sick with nerves for the better part of the past week, and you didn’t need another reason to feel like you were on the verge of throwing up.
(In the back of your skull, something cruel and vile whispered that there might be another explanation for your sudden bouts of nausea – something less ignorable than pure, ungrounded anxiety. You drowned it out before it could reach your conscious mind.)
Shoko broke the silence without prompting. You were grateful for that, too – you really didn’t have the courage to speak up first. “So,” she started, leaning on the edge of your metal slab. “You wanted to see me because of a… late period?”
Her mask hid most her expression, but you could make out the faint hint of a chuckle underneath her bedside manner. Your eyes fell into your lap. “A missed period,” you corrected. “I haven’t gotten it this month, either.”
She hummed, but didn’t respond. You sighed. Shoko was grounded, but she wasn’t kind. You should’ve known she wouldn’t make this easy for you.
“I’m worried I might be pregnant.”
To her credit, if she was surprised, it was impossible to tell. “Have you been taking your birth control?”
“Yeah, obviously, but I’m terrible about remembering condoms and Satoru never manages to pull out.” It felt strange to describe your sex life to your boyfriend’s closest friend, but you soldiered on. She was a medical professional, a doctor. Your preferred methods of protection (or lack thereof) couldn’t have been the worst thing she’d heard that day. “I’ve already taken a test, but I just want to make sure. Cursed energy is already so complicated, and I know Satoru exceeds a lot of expectations. I don’t know if he, like, has—”
This time, she cut you off with an airy, but blatant laugh. “You think he’s got magic sperm?”
“He fights invisible monsters and teleports,” you snapped, your anxiety turning into irritation in the blink of an eye. “I don’t think ‘magic sperm’ is that unrealistic!”
For a moment, she seemed to regard you – her dark eyes boring into your wrinkled clothes, your disheveled hair, the bags under your eyes nearly deep enough to match her own. Even if she didn’t understand why you were worried, she’d have to recognize that you were, in fact, worried. And, if she really was your friend, she’d at least offer to help.
You held your breath until finally, she cracked, straightening her back with and audible sigh. “And why, exactly, couldn’t you go to a standard obstetrician about this?”
“Because you’re the best doctor I know and I’d trust you with my life?”
“Try again.”
“Because I can’t afford the co-pay and if I use Satoru’s card, he’ll find out.” You deflated after finishing, crossing your arms over your chest. “I… I really just want to know. If it turns out I did have a reason to worry, I’ll figure out what to do next, but—” This time, your voice cut out all on its own. You forced yourself to swallow before going on. “I just want to know, first. Satoru doesn’t have to be involved.”
It was an awful position to put her in, you knew. For as much as you trusted her, she’d known Satoru for years. She had every right to go to him about this, even if you really, really wished she wouldn’t. She didn’t owe you anything, much less her help. Much less her silence.
But there was a reason you trusted Shoko, that you felt as unreasonable close to her as you did. Above her mask, you saw her eyes soften before they flickered away from you, landing on the counter she’d already visited. “Lay down and take off what you need to,” she said, her gruff professionalism back in full force. “It might not be conclusive, but the most I can do is a physical examination. It’s not much, but if you don’t trust a real test, it’s the best thing I can offer you.”
You couldn’t help yourself – nearly falling off the table as you pulled her into a bone-crushing, lung-flattening hug. “Ieiri, you’re the best,” you nearly shouted, your voice bouncing off the blank walls of her office. You moved to thank her again, and again, and again, but she pried you off of her before you had the chance, muttering a curt ‘you’re welcome’ before turning away to make her preparations and escape your unwanted gratitude. You managed to stop yourself from chasing after her, and yet, you were still smiling as you settled back onto the table.
Still, embarrassment quickly dampened the brighter edges of your relief as Shoko glanced over her shoulder. “Are you comfortable with undressing here, or would you rather leave the room?”
You blanched, and Shoko was kind enough not to laugh before going on. “You did know you were basically coming to be for a gynecological exam, right?”
“I mean, yes, but—” You hadn’t, but then again, you weren’t sure what else you’d expected. This made sense, even if it was leagues beyond anything you thought to brace yourself for. If Shoko thought it would help, then it’d help. “Do I get a gown, or…?”
Her eyes fell to your skirt, long enough to fall just an inch or so above your knee. “That won’t be necessary. Take off your panties and lay down – I’ll be over in a second.”
Your face burnt, but you nodded, and she turned away. Biting your inner cheek, you swung your legs over the side of the table and kicked off your shoes. Shoko pretended to be preoccupied while you shrugged your panties down your legs and, with no other option, stuffed them into the pocket of your jacket. It was awkward – lying down and spreading your legs with Shoko less than a full ten feet away. It was one thing to ask your acquaintance for medical advice, and another to let your boyfriend’s friend act as your pro-bono gynecologist.
You heard a few tools clatter onto a metal tray, the padded feet of a stool scrape across the tiled floor, and wordlessly, Shoko positioned herself at the foot of the examination table. “This should only take a few minutes,” she said, as her gloved fingers skirted along the inside of your knee, then your thigh, before reaching your pussy. Your labia, you corrected, internally. If she could be a professional about this, so could you. “Let me know if you feel any pain.”
You nodded, keeping your eyes focused intently on the ceiling above you. Even if you had looked down, your skirt would’ve blocked most of your view, which was how you preferred it. You couldn’t see Shoko, and hopefully, she couldn’t see the way you flinched as she spread a cold, pricking sort of lubricant over your entrance, as she eased two fingers into your otherwise dry cunt. You’d assumed she would use a tool, but then again, you couldn’t imagine what kind. And besides, you really shouldn’t have been questioning a doctor.
Shoko’s voice was gruff, distracted. “How’s that?”
“F-Fine,” you squeaked. “Please, do whatever you need to.”
“Satoru’s got you that worn down, huh?” She let out a breath of a laugh, but leaned in, easing her digits into until she was knuckle deep. Her fingers were thin, but long and graceful in a way that made them difficult to ignore when paired with the strange tactility of her gloves. Her free hand curled around your ankle, as if to hold you in place. “I’m going start the test. It might feel a little strange, so try not to move.”
She gave you a moment to brace yourself before spreading her fingers apart, inadvertently pressing against the sensitive walls of your pussy. On reflex, you snapped your thighs shut, but Shoko caught you by the knee before you could attempt to break her arm. “Easy there.” And then, as her thumb pushed slow circles into your skin, “Think you can hold these open for me?”
You didn’t try to say anything, but with more than a little effort, you spread your legs – planting your feet more firmly on either corner of the table. “Thatta girl,” Shoko muttered, seemingly more used to comforting scared pets than nervous patients. “Remember – we’re here because you wanted to be. If you want to back out, just say the word.”
You shook your head furiously, instinctually. You’d never do that to Shoko, and she seemed to know that – not waiting for verbal confirmation before starting to move. She seemed to need to stretch you open, judging by the repetitive, scissor-like motions of her fingers, the way she huffed in irritation as she slipped yet another digit inside of you. You knew it was inappropriate, but it would’ve been impossible to stop yourself from heating up, from squirming, from dampening around her in a way that you couldn’t entirely separate from arousal. You kept your hips still and dug your teeth into your bottom lip with enough force to break the skin (you would’ve rather died than moaned during a medical exam), but your cunt wasn’t as easily reigned in. It wasn’t long before a sickeningly slick clicking-type noise accompanied every little movement of her fingers. Hopefully, she’d just assume she’d used more lube than she’d meant to. You didn’t know what you’d do with yourself, if she didn’t.
“Like I said – it’s a quick procedure, not a comfortable one. Most patients have a difficult time staying still.” It was humiliating – how steady her voice was while you were falling apart, fighting just to keep yourself from bucking into a medical professional’s hand. It took everything you had not to whimper when the scissoring slowed, then stopped altogether, only to be immediately replaced by the awful, terrible, embarrassingly wonderful feeling of her fingers curling inside of you, grinding against the most vulnerable part of your cunt. “It’s important to be thorough, though. I’m sure you understand why this is necessary.”
She couldn’t have done it on purpose. Nothing about this could’ve ever been intentional, and yet, when her wrist slipped, the heel of her palm seemed to land perfectly onto your neglected clit. It wasn’t much, just the hint of stimulation, but it was enough for you to seize-up – your nails scrambling helplessly over smooth titanium as you came, silently, around her fingers. Shoko, ever the professional, didn’t so much as slow down.
She only hummed, keeping her hand where it was – her palm now grinding broad, harsh patterns into your clit. “Are you usually this easily stimulated?”
You opened your mouth, but all you could seem to choke out was a single, jagged whimper. Shoko clicked her tongue. “I’m sorry, I should’ve phrased that in a way you’d understand.” And then, as she spread her fingers apart cruelly, “Do you normally cum in less than a minute with Satoru?”
This time, a strangled cry was as much of an answer as you could’ve possibly given. You weren’t sure why she was asking, but… this wasn’t normal for you, was it? And now that she mentioned it, you did feel more stimulated than you should’ve during anything remotely medical. Your skin felt hotter, more sensitive where it’d come into contact with her lubricant, and it was getting hard to think, hard to justify not grinding into her hand as she curled and twisted her fingers inside of you. God. You knew you’d been a wreck, lately, but you never would’ve thought that it gotten this bad.
The nails of Shoko’s free hand bit into your ankle, and too strung-out to stop yourself, you let out a whine by way of protest. She chuckled, and suddenly, you were empty, left bucking your hips into vacant air as she drew back. “Poor thing,” she muttered, her sympathy tinged with a sardonic sort of condescension. “I’ve got one last test. Think you can bear with me?”
“Ye—Yes,” you chirped. At that point, it was meaningless – you would’ve agreed to anything so long as she was the one suggesting it. You’d shut your eyes at some point, but you could still hear Shoko’s footsteps, feel her standing above you as she positioned herself at your side. One gloved hand cupped your cheek while the other pressed something blunt and thick against your cunt and, with no warning other than a mumbled reminder to ‘breathe, pretty girl, breathe’, thrust it inside of you.
Her reminder, sadly, proved useless. The air hitched in your lungs as a ribbed shaft filled your overeager pussy, the object curved in a way that made it feel like it was pressing into every fucking part of you at the exact same fucking time. Your hands shot to Shoko’s wrist, searching for something more forgiving than cold metal to ground yourself with. You tried to pull yourself together, and you might’ve been able to if two distinct, silicone-wrapped prongs hadn’t slotted against your clit or, even more damningly, if whatever tool Shoko was using hadn’t started to shake.
Saying you came embarrassingly quickly would’ve been an understatement. There was no pretense of dignity, this time; just grit teeth and twitching legs and one long, miserable sob. Shoko nursed you through it, rocking her vibrating tool inside of you gently until your climax had died into total limpness and the occasional, unsteady gasp. The tool was drawn back, but Shoko’s hand lingered, her thumb tracing patterns into your cheek. “Such a good girl,” she mumbled, and you melted into her touch. “Feeling a little tired?”
It was sickeningly guilt-inducing, just how nice she was being to you after you’d done nothing but humiliate yourself in front of her. “A little,” you admitted, smiling sheepishly. Shoko smiled back. You couldn’t remember when she’d taken off her mask.
“Close your eyes and catch your breath. I’ll finish up while you get a little rest.”
It was all you could do to nod before slumping into yourself, your body going slack despite your best attempts to hold yourself up. Her reassurance was nice, but unnecessary.
In less than a full second, you were out like a light.
~
In Shoko’s defense, she did actually take the time to check. After you passed out, as delicate as Satoru had always bragged you were, she tested the blood sample taken prior to your “exam”. It took a total of three minutes, and left her with good news and bad news to deliver when you woke up.
The good news was, predictably, that you’d been right. You were pregnant. About a month along, in fact. Congratulations, mazel tov, etc.
The bad news was, of course, that you were pregnant, and that Satoru had finally managed to knock you up. Thoughts and prayers, get well soon, etc.
From her make-shift desk on the far side of the room, she spared a glance to where you were still sleeping on her autopsy table. You’d rolled onto your side since she last checked on you, your pleated shirt bunching at your waist as you used your arms as a rudimentary pillow. It’d be a lie to say she didn’t understand why Satoru had gone so crazy about you so quickly. What you were – an ordinary human with enough cursed energy to see, but not act – was rare, your continuous ability to gloss over the uglier parts of their world in favor of perpetual, delusional optimism even more so. It’d be impressive, if she didn’t know it was going to get you fucked over eventually.
You were cute. It’s surprised her when she first met you in-person, when she first realized that.
It’d surprised her a little less when she realized that you even cuter mumbling gibberish as you came around her fingers.
Her eyes fell back to the phone in her hand. Her messages with Satoru were already open, what she’d been deliberating on telling him already typed out. She sighed, checked the picture she’d taken of you sprawled out on her table, three of her fingers buried in your cunt, and hit send.
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your girlfriend has something to tell you.
sending a bill for my time btw.
Three dots appeared at the bottom of the screen, signaling that Satoru was typing a response, before disappearing just as quickly. He tried calling her a second later, and she muted her phone before tossing it half-heartedly in the nearest drawer and turning back to you. Judging by your durability (or lack thereof), she’d have a few more minutes before you woke up, and another half an hour before the aphrodisiac gel she’d used on you started to wear off. You’d likely want to rush home to Satoru, when you finally got your hard-earned results.
Again, Shoko sighed, a slight smile tugging at the corner of her lips.
It’d just be a waste not to have a little fun while she could, right?
#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x you#yandere imagines#yandere jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#jjk imagines#yandere jjk#jujutsu kaisen x reader#yandere ieiri shoko#ieiri shoko x reader
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omg i love your work!! if posisble, can you do a part 2 to touching their wings and stuff with the dateables or maybe other characters? thank you and take care :D
touching their tails/horns/etc. pt 2
includes: diavolo, barbatos, simeon, mephisto, raphael x/& gn!reader (no pronouns mentioned)
wc: .5k | rated t | m.list | pt 1
a/n: i took a lot of creative liberties with this one, either because their forms haven't been revealed or just because i wanted to so just assume most of this is not canon at all lol
please reblog and like <33
➳ diavolo laughs as you poke at the gilded ends of his wings, taking in the intricate design. “it’s real gold,” he says before you can ask, gesturing to the tips of his horns, “as are these. it’s a birth present to children of our family, laced with magic that let’s it grow and change along with is. it’s a symbol of our wealth, our status.” you reach up to touch his horns, and he leans into your touch, happy to let you explore as you wish. “sometimes i think they’re a bit much, and then i remember who i am,” he continues, and you chuckle, making him laugh again too.
➳ barbatos’ tail twitches as you run your hand along it, obviously surprised by the texture. “that feels good,” he says mildly, and you give him a grin, twisting the end of each forked part between your fingers gently. if it keeps you occupied he’s happy to let you play with his tail for as long as you want. only because of that, obviously. not because he can’t remember the last time, if ever, someone’s touched him like this. or because your touch is soothing something inside of him he hadn’t known needed soothed.
➳ mephisto bows his head for you, letting you feel over the nubs where his horns should have been. “they never grew in quite properly,” he explains, sighing as you scratch gently at his scalp around them, “which is why i don’t often reveal my demon form. it’s a bit embarrassing, isn’t it? of course, my parents offered to have false horns inset, and lord diavolo knows we had the money for it, but, well, that just sounded like a bother.” you press your fingers to hs head, eyes steady, and he’s glad to see you’re not thinking of him any differently.
➳ raphael unfurls his wings, and you catch your breath. he’s often been told that his wings are beautiful, richly colored like a peacock’s, and your reaction goes on to support that opinion. “you can touch, if you’d like,” he offers, and you don’t hesitate, burying your fingers in the downy feathers near where they connect to his back. his head falls back, and a quiet peace goes over the two of you as you stroke your way from base to wing tip, then back, soothing actions putting him on the verge of sleep.
➳ simeon wakes up to the feel of your touch on his wing, soft and hesitant. sometime during the night, he’d transformed into his angel form, wings splayed out and over the bed, almost covering the whole thing in their enormity. they certainly cover you, like a warm, live, down blanket. he twitches instinctively, and you pull your hands back. “no, no,” he says sleepily, “you can keep going. it feels good when you touch me.” he sees you smile and smiles too, even though he’s already being lured back into sleep by your soft strokes across the top of his wing, where the feathers are smooth and packed together.
leviathans-watching's work - please do not copy, repost, or claim as your own
#obey me#obey me game#obey me shall we date#shall we date obey me#obey me x reader#obey me x you#obey me x mc#obey me x y/n#diavolo obey me#obey me diavolo#simeon obey me#obey me simeon#barbatos obey me#obey me barbatos#raphael obey me#obey me raphael#mephisto obey me#obey me mephisto#diavolo x you#diavolo x reader#barbatos x you#barbatos x reader#simeon x you#simeon x reader#raphael x you#raphael x reader#mephisto x you#mephisto x reader#anon ask#answered asks
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even if it’s a false god — e.m.
part two; we'd still worship this love
pairing: modern!college!fboy eddie x fem!reader
warnings: smut!!!!!!, 18+, MINORS DNI or ill bite u. p in v, cr*ampie, kinda br*eding kink, unprotected s*x (wrap it up irl angels, this is fiction.), angst angst angst, ASSHOLE FBOY EDDIE!!!, drinking, degrading, swearing, praises, nicknames, vv slight ch*king kink if u squint, some rough stuff.
summary: in which you are friends with benefits with modern!fuckboy!eddie (wc:4.1k)
a/n: i was def thinking of a pt.2 for this while writing it tbh. mr asshole munson needs to repair some hearts!!! also i made the pic in the middle bc i couldn't find a fitting picture w this lyric lmaooo!! did not proof-read!! ignore any mistakes AND PLSS send me ur thoughts ily xo, em
“It was fun babysitting you, sweetheart, but I have to dip,” Steve whispered in your ear with a sympathetic smile, his hand pointing toward the blonde who was impatiently waiting for him.
“What?” You asked, baffled. “Steve, you fucking promised!” You groaned.
“Jesus Christ, do you not have any ounce of self-control?” He asked, and you gave him an intense look.
“Obviously not!” You huffed, arms crossing against your chest, causing Steve to chuckle.
“Robin will come back eventually! And in the mean time, just stay the fuck away from him,” He warned.
“Now, I gotta get laid.” He winked. You tried to open your mouth, but he interrupted. “I swear to god, Y/N, I don’t wanna hear another word from you, you’ve cockblocked me enough this week.” He said, annoyed.
You rolled your eyes, huffing as you stood straight, “Fine! Have fun.” You exclaimed, and Steve grinned, “I will, sweetheart. And you, just... hide from him or something.” He shrugged as he guided the blonde girl out of the door.
Jesus fucking Christ.
You were pathetic, asking for Steve and Robin to babysit you, so that you wouldn’t end up under Eddie again, so that you could at least save some of the self-respect that you were sure probably didn’t exist at this point.
They knew each time you said you were done with him, it was a lie. They knew you’d go back for more, but now it had been two weeks—two whole weeks—where you managed to stay away from him, blocking him for good.
And you could feel yourself cracking; you wanted—needed—him with every fiber of your being, and it was driving you crazy.
He drew you in with whatever he did, like a magnet always pulling you toward him, making you need to be around him, at all times.
You missed the way his hands grazed your thighs, the way he fucked you so rough and senselessly, but also so gently. The way his pretty mouth framed compliments so fucking sweetly, but turned dirty the moment he was pounding into you, praising you but degrading you at the same time.
He was so good at fucking, but was shit at everything else.
Just like you.
So the idea of being friends with benefits sounded like heaven when you first suggested it. No feelings attached, no exclusivity, just fucking each other's brains out while also having someone to chat with afterward.
It was supposed to be simple—so fucking simple.
But the moment feelings got involved, it turned out for the worst. Jealousy was a bitter monster that gnawed at the insides of the two of you, and it had turned into something so incredibly toxic that you knew you had to end it. Your friendship was long gone now, turning into a bitter competition where you either fucked or argued.
Exclusivity was not something the two of you ever discussed, you knew you were bad at relationships, and Eddie knew he wasn’t good at feelings, so it was a topic you always danced around. Arguments ensued the moment one of you fucked someone else, and bitterness was present in your veins like it had always been there.
When Eddie decided to fuck another girl two weeks ago, you decided you were done. This wasn’t good for the both of you, and you needed to stop it as fast as you could.
You knew the emptiness you felt right after you fucked was not worth it, no matter how good Eddie was.
You were tired of sobbing into Steve’s chest drunkenly, confused about what you even felt for Eddie when he was out there fucking another girl.
It was starting to leave a bad taste in your mouth, and you didn’t want to hate Eddie—not more than you already did at the moment.
But there stood Eddie, curly hair laid messily on his forehead as a guitar pick adorned his neck, his infamous leather jacket paired with those black pants were your nightmare—dream—combo, he was sprawled on the couch, thick thighs spread apart, you wished you could part them further with your hands, rub him through his pants as you got down on your knees for him, giving his delicious pink-tip kitten licks as you tasted his salty pre-cum—
What the fuck was wrong with you? You shook your head as you turned around immediately, gazing into your empty cup as you hurried off to the kitchen.
Your cheeks grew hot from embarrassment, you seriously had no fucking self-control or respect.
“You need any help?” Eddie’s voice rang in your ear.
“‘M fine,” You muttered, voice barely audible.
“You know I’ve been lookin’ for you.”
“Why? Did you finally run out of girls to fuck on campus?” You said snarkily, a smirk tugging on your lips.
“Don’t act so fuckin’ innocent now, sweetheart.” He tssked, causing you to throw him a quizzed look.
“Didn’t you go home with Mr. Jock last week?” He was being possessive again, and you hated how it picked up your heart rate, you were stupid.
“So?” You quirked a brow, teasing him, and he gave you a slight chuckle.
That smug asshole, why did he have to always look so good?
“So…how was it?” He asked, and you could feel his jaw tensing as he took a step closer to you, trapping you between the drink stand and his body.
“You’re disgusting.” You groaned as you pushed him away from your face. You were not going to give in.
“That bad, huh?” He mocked, scrunching his nose.
You rolled your eyes. “No.” You lied.
It was bad, really fucking bad; the guy lasted 30 seconds and left you with nothing. That greedy bastard.
But you weren’t going to let Eddie know that.
“He was really good, actually.” You were lying through your teeth, and thankfully, Eddie didn’t seem to notice. An intense rage flashed through his eyes.
“You sayin’ that punk is better than me?” He slurred into your ear, his breath ragged and hot as it fanned against your neck. He smelled so fucking addicting—a mix of sandalwood and nicotine, earthy and making you crave him at the same time.
You don’t even know how he even came to that conclusion, but it was funny, seeing him like this, nostrils flaring as rage filled his veins, like he was in torture hearing about the guys you fucked, he deserved that.
But your silence at his question meant everything to him; he didn’t need an answer. You knew he was better, and he knew that you were crawling closer to his palm now.
He grew more confident because of the way you stuck to him. “I've seen him in the locker room, sweetheart. He’s not that fuckin’ impressive.” You didn’t mean to gasp, but it slipped past your lips quickly.
“Munson!” You warned, a smile tugged on your lips, and you realized how pathetic you were being again, but it was too late now.
“Don’t think he can make you smile like I do, either.” He grinned smugly, his calloused hands quick to pull the strand of hair on your face, to see the way your eyes crinkled when you smiled, so fucking promising.
“You're a jerk,” You spat, groaning as you turned around, trying to avoid him, but it was no use; the damage was done, and you were putty in his hands again.
He had a tight hold on your arm, possessive again, and you were sick for enjoying his rough side. He spun you around to meet him, eyes dark, before he held you in place. “A jerk who makes you feel good,” Eddie purred in your ear, fingers tracing toward your exposed skin, one touch from him, and you whimpered, all that anger fading away so quickly.
He chuckled darkly. “Missed those sweet lil’ whimpers,” He whispered in your ear again, fingers quick to find their way toward your panties.
He drew slow circles with his thumb while you tried to remain tight-lipped, but it was impossible.
“Jesus—fuck, Eddie som—someone could see...” You didn’t mean to throw your head back against the wall. Your eyes fluttered shut, and Eddie shrugged.
“Don’t care, sweetheart.”
“Well, I do.” You didn’t; Eddie could fuck you right here, right now, and you’d be fine with it, but you weren’t ready to admit this to yourself, and you didn’t want to take the chance of Robin seeing you like this.
He groaned as he dragged you into the nearest room. You would’ve cried at the loss of contact if he didn’t have a tight hold on your body, calloused hands gripping at your curves, and your thighs rubbed together at his touch.
Eddie was quick to pin you against the door, his hand curling around the back of your neck. He smashed his lips against yours without hesitating, kissing you the same way he made you feel; explosive, hard, and dizzying.
He pulled back to look at you.
Sweet Jesus.
His gaze was intense, and it made you feel so fucking exposed that it startled a gasp out of your lips.
You fisted his shirt when you had enough, yanking him closer to you so that you could feel his body pressed into yours. Everything you felt was pure hunger, craving him deeply.
Your heart was pounding in your chest when you felt his rock hard bulge grinding against you, calloused hands gripped your ass as you whimpered; you were at his mercy now.
“What were you sayin’ last time? That this would never happen again?” He mocked, whispering against your face, his gaze never leaving you.
Your eyes narrowed, but it was impossible to keep up your act when his fingers started ghosting over your thighs again. “Fuck. You.” You spat.
“You don’t have to ask me twice, baby.” He grinned, chuckling when you whimpered under his touch.
“God, I love those sweet noises you make for me…” He murmured, you rubbed your thighs again at his words. “I bet if I flipped that little skirt of yours… I’d find you gushing for me.” He groaned.
And you remained tight-lipped. God, you didn’t want to feed into his huge fucking ego, and you wanted to wipe that smug smirk off his face.
But he was so right. Your thighs were dampened by how aroused you were.
He was quick to slip his fingers past your panties, a grunt escaping his lips once he pushed past your folds, your slick covering his fingers. He chuckled darkly. “You’re soaking my fingers, honey.”
“I—Fuck—I hate you.” You squeezed your eyes shut, and Eddie reveled in it, his fingers pushing inside of you while his thumb stayed on your clit.
“Always sayin’ shit you don’t mean, baby.” He mocked. “Gonna make you beg for my cock, if you keep’ talkin like that.”
You were panting and head dizzy as he pushed his fingers in and out of you. You were going to lose it, and he had barely started.
When he finally undressed both of you, you were out of it, while his hands were still on your clit as he groaned at the sight in front of him.
You were perfect.
His breath was ragged when he traced your chest, eyes bulging when he realized you had no bra on, pleasure ignited in you more and more when he cupped your breasts, teeth tugging your nipple as his fingers still toyed with your clit.
“Perfect tits, just made for me, huh?” He growled, making you mewl; you were putty in his hands, and with each movement, you were getting closer and closer to beg him for more.
The more you whimpered, the rougher he got with you, curling his finger inside your cunt as he hit that one spot, eliciting a moan from you as you threw your head back.
“P—please.” You whimpered, and Eddie tutted.
“I’ve seen you do much better than that.” He hummed. This arrogant asshole was going to be the death of you.
“P—please, Eds, please.” You begged, and your moans died down your throat, before he slowly dragged his fingers out and shoved them back in.
Your head cocked to the side in pleasure, and he was quick to take advantage of it, licking a path from your neck to your ear, grinning.
“Mhmm… not good enough, baby.” He purred in your ear as you whined, “Jesus fucking Christ—” Your cursing was interrupted when he yanked his hands away.
No. No. No. No!
“Shitshitshit—Please, Fuck, Eds...” You murmured, eyes shooting wide open, “Need your cock inside’a me.” You mewled again.
His dark chuckle reverberated through you, “See, that wasn’t that hard, was it?” He mocked, causing your eyes to narrow.
“You assho—” He didn’t let you finish as he wrapped his hands around your throat, just enough to punish you but just enough for pleasure to course through your veins. And it felt so fucking good.
You shut your mouth quickly, “What were you saying, baby?” He purred.
God, that egotistic prick was pushing you to your last fucking limit; you could do it, you could hold it off. But on the other hand, you could feel yourself pulsing with need; if he didn’t pound into you soon, you knew you would’ve been a pathetic blabbering mess.
“Please, please, Fuck me,” You grunted. “I need you, Eddie.” He didn’t respond as he tapped your thighs, signaling for you to wrap your legs around his chest, and you were quick to oblige.
Mind spinning before you got a chance to process what happened, he slammed into you with a vicious thrust, he was so fucking thick that it made you let out a guttural scream, tears welled at your eyes as you tried to adjust to his size.
It wasn’t long before your loud noises turned into incoherent babbles and squeals as he kept his pace.
“Holy shit, baby,” He groaned, watching his cock sliding into you, “Such a warm fuckin’ pussy, and so fucking tight… Jesus…”
You trembled beneath him, tits bouncing up and down as your mouth hung open each time he slid further into your cunt, and Eddie wanted that image etched into his brain forever.
He tilted you upward, hitting spots you weren’t even aware of. You were quick to wrap your hands around his frame, your nails digging into his back, roughly.
He was the only one who knew you like that; both emotionally and physically, and the same went for you, that’s why the two of you never could truly let each go, clinging to each other like a child did to their favorite toy.
You know no one else could fuck you like he did, and that smug bastard knew it, too.
The way he was pounding into you while uttering curses at your ear, furiously slapping into your body as if you were nothing but his personal fucktoy, truly his.
And you realized how sick you were for liking it, truly enjoying being this way with him.
“You look so fuckin’ pretty when you take my cock, such a tight fuckin’ pussy and all mine, yea?” He panted causing you to nod, you were barely able hold his gaze, and he groaned before his hands roughly grabbed your cheeks, forcing your head in his direction.
“Look at me baby…” He purred, “Look, how well your cunt is squeezin’ me. You feel that, peach?” He sheathed himself further into you, and you could feel your walls clench around him, a contented groan leaving both of your lips.
It was fucking perfect. Everything was rough and messy, there was nothing emotional about the way you fucked. You were both using each other to cum as much as you wanted to, not stopping until you were both sweaty bodies.
He could make you come apart in seconds if he wanted to, knowing your body better than anyone else. And you could make the scary freak Eddie putty in your hands if you wanted to; it was a fucked up game of control that had the two of you going at it for hours.
Was it fucked up? Yes.
Did it feel good? Absolutely.
“Would that asshole be able to make you come apart like this?” He asked, fingers digging into your hips, sure to leave a bruise.
This wasn’t the first time Eddie had been possessive; it was a sick, twisted game that you also participated in, almost as if both of you knew that you could never be with anyone else.
You nodded mindlessly, you weren’t going to give into him that easily, again, he grunted at your lack of reaction.
“Tell me, baby.” He growled, his pounding slowing down to make sure your orgasm was out of reach for you, torturing you until he had you begging under him.
You weren’t sure if you wanted to give up this fast. “Beg me, honey.” His movements picked up, and his hands were quick to toy with your clit, a sharp burst of euphoria rang through your body, leaving you speechless.
You clenched around him—a big fucking mistake—and he grinned smuggly again. “I know, baby, I know you’re close.” He panted. “I can make you cum, angel.” He promised, “Just say the word.”
“Asshole,” You groaned between his forceful thrusts, and he chuckled darkly. You rolled your hips against his when his movements faltered, seeking the warmth and the friction when he thrusted into you fully, filling you to the brim.
And that prick was thoroughly enjoying your torture. “Tell me it’s all mine, that you’re all mine.” He purred against your ear.
You couldn’t. You shouldn’t.
But the way his thumb circled around your clit, so agonizingly slow, and the way his cock was prodding into you so slowly was torture. God, if he just picked up his pace.
Don’t.
You try to convince yourself, but it's to no avail, you are clenching down on nothing, and it hurts. Your hole is pulsing now, and you need him more than ever.
“P—please,” You mewled, causing Eddie to give you a slight smirk. “Please what, baby? Use your words.”
“I’m all yours,” You murmured, “He could never fuck me like you could.” You added, humming contently, when Eddie started to pound into you relentlessly again.
“Please—I need to—Jesus, Eds.” Your words slurred into a moan as he increased his speed, his finger circling your clit roughly.
“Oh fuck, fuck, baby. Feels so good.” He panted. “Please—please make me cum, sir.” You sobbed, unable to hold it back anymore.
And that was all Eddie needed to hear. “Cum for me, honey.” He pleaded, and you gave him low whimpers as he started fucking you faster again, watching the way his cock disappeared into your gushing cunt.
“Wanna feel you cum on my cock, baby.” He breathed.
“Shit, feels so good, Eds.”
“Jesus—Please… I’m going to—” You bit down on your lower lip, unable to stifle the moans leaving your lips as his assault on your clit was enough to bring you over the edge,
“I’m gonna—I’m…Holy shit, oh god!” You sobbed, whole body convulsing in pleasure as you came around his cock, your vision blurred and mind foggy as you didn’t realize how your orgasm was triggering his.
Eddie was whimpering for you now, “So fucking good, holy shit.” He panted, movements getting sloppier.
“I’m gonna cum, fuck, baby. My perfect fucking girl, yea?” He heaved a breath.
“I’m gonna fuck this—Gonna fuck my load into you, peach.”
“Gonna fill you with my cum—Fuuuck.” He growled, animalistic noises escaping him as he exploded inside of you, thick ropes of his warm cum painting your walls.
He groaned when he slipped out, mouth-watering as he enjoyed the sight of you fucked out of your mind, and his load dripping down your thighs.
The relief you had was short-lived as that sinking feeling came to you again, the emptiness, the loneliness.
Was all of it worth it?
The two of you dressed in silence; the weight of what you did was hitting you all at once. You did it again. You had sex with him again. You let him use you again—it didn’t matter if you used him too, it meant something different for you than it did for him.
All those thoughts you had about feeling good faded out quicker than you thought they would.
You were so fucking pathetic.
Jesus Christ.
You felt sick, what the fuck did you just do?
As soon as Eddie got dressed, he gave your cheek a sloppy kiss. He was going to leave you all alone again.
You should be fine with this, this is what always happens.
Don’t—don’t say anything, just take your last bit of self-respect that is possibly non-existent and leave without another word—
“You’re…leaving?” You exhale, your mind racing with ideas.
Shit. Just shut the fuck up.
“Don’t act so coy now, sweetheart.” He gave you a slight smile, but all you wanted to do was slap it out of him.
“We both know what this was.” He muttered, that conceited dickhead still had that smile on his face.
“And what exactly was ‘this’?” You pointed to the space between the two of you.
“Fucking, no strings attached?” He added, shrugging. The fact that he had no clue about anything was pissing you off.
“Unbelievable.” You gave him a dry chuckle.
“What?” He asked, baffled.
“Is that all I am to you, just a warm body?” You said, face crinkling with disgust.
“I’m confused.” Eddie said. “You—you were the one who fucking suggested this.” He breathed.
“Well, I’m un-suggesting it!” You exclaimed angrily.
“You—you are so fucking confusing!” He spat. “I told you—I told you we could be more... told you we could try... us.” He stuttered. “You were the one who refused!”
“You were drunk! You can barely fucking say it now!” You spat back.
“What... what do you even want, Y/N?” He asked, holding his gaze.
“Do you want a relationship? Do you want something meaningful?” He pondered, a sarcastic chuckle escaping his lips.
“Is it so wrong for me to want that? To want something real?” Your voice carried so much emotion, and that’s what killed him.
He couldn’t have a relationship with you even if he wanted to; he recognized his own turmoil, and he feared he would drag you right down with him. No matter how similar you seemed to be, he was sure he’d ruin you, completely and utterly. And not in a good way.
He swallowed physically; the lump in his throat wasn’t going to go away.
He couldn’t let you have hope; he couldn’t let you down again—he had done that enough.
''A relationship with you is the last thing I see myself doing.'' He almost whispered, but you heard it loud and clear.
Your brows were quick to furrow, and your jaw was was set in a tense manner. The lust in your gaze was long gone by now, containing only rage while you glared at the source of your pain.
“Fuck. You.” You spat, tears threatening to spill but you didn’t want to give him that satisfaction
“You are a sadistic fucking asshole, Munson.”
“Jesus… I think we should stop—whatever the hell, this is.” He exclaimed.
“Fine by me!” You exclaimed back cheeks heating up from anger.
“I really am done with you, this time.” Despite the intensity of your gaze, he could sense the subtle vulnerability in your eyes. The subtle pain that was fueling your anger
“Oh, I’m sure you are.” He chuckled smugly. This was something you two had joked about before, but it wasn’t funny now.
He saw you in the palm of his hand because you always came back to him, he was right… until now.
The fact that he laughed in your face at the thought of being in a relationship with you was too much, even for your low self-esteem.
“I don’t care what you think.” You didn’t even hold the rage you held before; only disgust was visible in your tone.
“You’re dead to me.” You replied curtly, your voice distant and chilling.
And Eddie knew how much he fucked up, truly.
There was nothing he could do now.
“I didn’t mean it like—” He regretted what he said immediately, but you dismissed his protests, gathering your jacket in your hand as you slammed the door behind you.
Tears blurred your vision as soon as you left, the lively sound of the party clouded your mind as you silently sobbed, trying to find Robin.
You knew how unattainable he was, and how much he truly hurt you, and as fucked up as it was, that's exactly why you loved him; led by blind faith that it would be different.
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson fic#eddie munson smut#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x y/n#fuckboy!eddie munson#modern!eddie munson x reader#fuckboy!eddie munson x reader#eddie munson angst#stranger things imagine#eddie munson
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consider: danny son of Joker
All Sharp Angles
—
Danny had always known that he was adopted; far before his parents had actually up and told him, anyways.
He’d just never looked like his family.
Where his parents were soft curves, he was all hard angles. He was lean and slender, almost willowy once he got his growth spurt, where his parents were broader and thicker-built.
Where his father’s hair was a warm, light black, like a cup of coffee, his was dark and cold like an oil spill.
Even his eyes were wrong; sure, his father’s eyes were blue too, but his were far darker. Danny’s were as light and frigid as arctic ice; even before he had died, they had never reflected enough light to seem alive.
So, when his parents finally told him the truth once he turned 15, it was honestly more of a relief than anything else. He wasn’t uniquely strange, he just didn’t look like his parents because he wasn’t related to them.
Still, he couldn’t help but be curious as to where he had come from. Sure, he liked his parents’ stories about the Fenton family and their rich (probably false) history, but he had roots branching elsewhere, too.
So, with money he had earned from washing cars and mowing lawns, he had bought a DNA test for 50 dollars, and sent a vial of blood in to whatever shady company he had bought it from.
The results…
He stared at the letter in shock.
He had already crumpled to the ground; luckily, he had been standing on the plush carpet of his room rather than the kitchen tile when he had opened it.
Father - Unknown
Mother - Dr. Harleen Quinzel
Fuck. Fuck.
That couldn’t be right, could it?
He checked the reviews of the company with manic speed; not a single other person had been named as being related to a rogue.
Could it be a prank?
Surely, the actual Harley Quinn never had time to have a child. Or, if she did, she would’ve been made to keep it by the Joker.
He began to google in a daze.
…
After a few minutes, he had his answer.
The longest time that the Joker had ever been in Arkham was for a year and a month.
He had gone in roughly 9 months before Danny was born, which technically gave Harley the time to have a child, put it up for adoption, and lose some of the baby fat before the Joker came back, all without him ever knowing.
Harley had also been mysteriously inactive for most of that time, too, which only gave more credibility to his theory.
What was he supposed to do with this, though?
It’s not like he could tell anyone. It’s not like it really changed anything in his day to day life, aside from his entire worldview.
Obviously he told Sam and Tucker, as well as Jazz after a few days.
Obviously he didn’t tell his parents.
…
In the end, not much came of it.
It was just another fact of life, another thing eating away at Danny’s mind. Another fear to internalize.
He had gotten so good at ignoring it, in fact, that he didn’t even remember where he came from when he was accepted to Gotham U, and drove a whole day to the only university willing to give him a scholarship.
…Well, as long as he keeps his nose out of trouble, it won’t matter much anyways. After all, what are the odds he actually meets anyone who might be able to figure it out?
#dcxdp#dpxdc#dcxdp crossover#dcxdp fic#spook speaks#askbox chats#this was actually originally gonna be much darker#might make the alternate version eventually
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How would the Straw Hat men try to get your attention HCS
Characters: Luffy, Zoro, Sanji, Ussop, Franky.
Masterlist
Luffy
He will get extremely touchy and noisy.
To the point of rolling on the floor and cry like a baby if you don't look at him.
If he discovers that you aren't paying attention to him on purpose, then he would even try to throw things at you (on a playful way) and bother you to the point you scream at him.
it can be very difficult to try to ignore him, so at some point you have to give up and embrase his strechy hugs and weird forms of affection.
Roronoa Zoro
He prefers the silent mode.
He will "bump" into you by accident, you will enter the crow nest while he is doing his exercises without a shirt.
He will be trying to show of his attributes to you in hope you go running to him.
When you ignore him deliberated, he ends up yelling at you on the deck.
"I want your freaking attetion woman, what i need to do to get it!?"
He got very desperate.
Black Leg Sanji
There are two directions this can go.
Super energetic, heart eyes, "Y/NNNN-Chwann!", type of thing or touchy but silent almost sensual one.
In either way he is very expressive about his devotion to you.
He will be passing next to you all they, just moving carefully but firmly your waist with his hands.
He knows that somethings makes you fall over hills for him and even that he will be willingly happy to get on his knees and accept his need for attetion, he previously will play a little.
Ussop
He would brag *lie* about things next to you, trying to impress you.
Once he even talked alone, he later said that he was making a mental list but nobody could have believed that.
He would talk about so many half false histories just to make you proud of him and gain your attention that you need to remind him that he doesn't need to lie to you.
When you finally pay attentino to him, he melts.
Franky
Contrary to what is ussually believe, i think that Franky would try to play it cool and be really serious.
People are used to him being loud and messy, so in hope to get your attetion he does the opposite to what is expected about him.
He would be playing it so cool that you start to think he is trying to imitate a fuckboy or superagent character.
When you finally show him the some little part of attention, he would go back to his ussual noisy self, obviously with a dance.
#one piece#one piece imagine#one piece x reader#one piece x you#one piece headcanons#straw hats imagine#straw hats x reader#straw hat luffy#straw hat pirates#cyborg franky#franky#franky x reader#franky x you#franky imagine#ussop imagine#ussop x reader#ussop#ussop x you#sanji x you#sanji x reader#sanji imagine#black leg sanji#vinsmoke sanji#sanji#vinsmoke sanji x you#vinsmoke sanji x reader#vinsmoke sanji imagine#black leg sanji x reader#black leg sanji imagine#black leg sanji x you
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symbolism - LOCKS
while we know the main reason for the conversation between anya & curly, we should also consider the irony of SAFETY … putting locks on the medical room + cockpit which are the two places that end up being the least safe, specifically for curly.
it’s obviously not the strongest point of the scene because the focus is anya … but this notion also proves how faulty of a character curly is. he’s oblivious to what anya was initially implying … so the false sense of security in LOCKS is almost karmic in a sense. (SYSTEM FAILURE)
i might talk about the setting more in the future but the way anya uses the lock to the medical room so she can isolate/kll herself. versus jimmy locking himself in the cockpit to get away from swansea …. it’s contradictory because they’re escaping from two different things iykyk
anyway, i genuinely love the screen scene so much sorry …. i’ll for sure analyze other ones soon 😭 this one just has the most depth and i really want to remind people that curly isn’t the saint yall think he is. especially with his relationship to anya…
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My dear lgbt+ kids,
Statistically speaking, you’ll probably not become the first openly trans president of the United States.
This may seem like a rather negative point.. or maybe just a pretty useless one. After all, you may not have any political ambitions or even be from the US! But I still think it’s occasionally a good reminder, for this reason:
Many of us mostly hear about trans people as a faceless group, as “the others”. When we do hear about trans people as individuals, it’s either stories about victims of hate crimes - or it’s people who are the „first ever openly trans person“ to achieve something special.
Obviously we want more headlines of the latter variant. It’s a positive societal shift that people can be open about their identity while having a great career. And of course it can also be great for the reader: it can be really empowering and inspiring to read about those trailblazers.
If you have big dreams and goals, then by all means, shoot for the stars! You’ll probably have some smaller wins before you get to the „first openly trans president“ level, but I believe in you!
With that being said: it’s a false dichotomy that trans people either end up dead or famous. You may very well just end up being some person. (Or some dude. Or some girl.)
That “first ever president” title can really only go to one person anyway - the majority of trans people just live normal lives. They write emails or they sell coffee or they drive busses or they raise their kid or they are unemployed. They lead lives that won’t generate any headlines at all. And that’s okay.
Trans people can achieve great things. But you don’t need to be living proof of that. You don’t need to achieve anything. You can just exist.
Trans rights also include the right to be utterly unremarkable.
With all my love,
Your Tumblr Dad
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2024 reads / storygraph
So Witches We Became
YA horror
a girl and her friends go on vacation to a house on a private Florida island, but when a strange mist and toxic tar surrounds them, trapping them there, they have to find a way to survive and/or escape
while she’s being haunted by a traumatic experience with her friend’s boyfriend - who just showed up - that she’s been unable to tell anyone about, and by a shadow from her childhood that she fears might have something to do with what’s happening
sapphic, explores complicated friendships, and surviving assault
#So Witches We Became#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#Ooh yeah I thought this was good!#the first half especially was super atmospheric and had some Very creepy horror moments.#I do wonder if it would have been better if the witchy stuff was a bit more ambiguous and just its own unique paranormal thing-#if it weren’t for the title I feel like it would have felt especially random. As it is; it felt a little basic; comparatively? idk.#(I did wonder for most of the book what witches had to do with anything).#A few aspects felt a little heavy handed & I wonder if they could have been handled with more subtlety? But maybe the directness is needed.#I kinda wish there was a bit more with Nell and Harper’s relationship over the weekend#obviously the build up of tension is the point but I wish we’d seen some of the positives of their friendship#not just the flashbacks to when they were kids; because it felt like such a sudden shift from resentment to friends again at the end#I just didn’t really have any empathy for harper for most of it especially with Gavin being SO blatantly and unsubtley horrible#(though I guess Nell’s POV was biased toward showing that for obvious reasons)#but those are two specific things - broadly speaking I enjoyed it a lot!#Yay for some love for zines! though “blogs/tumblr and the like had made them all but obsolete’ false!!!!! zinefests still go hard!!#sapphic books#ya horror
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I love how transparent you are about what its like to be a self published author in this day and age, and i was just wondering if there was a difference on your side between amazon ebook/paperback and audible - and also if Scribd is any better, because i use it as an alternative to amazon whenever possible (and whenever the library doesnt own a copy of whatever im looking for) is it functionally all the same? What is best for you?
Thank you!
I actually did a huge long post a while back when I got the audiobooks produced and uploaded to various platforms. I included Scribd in the breakdown after people falsely claim that Scrib is better for authors than Amazon/Libraries.
A lot of people were not happy when I burst that particular bubble by showing that Scribd paid me 97 cents out of the 19.99 price tag. Which is less than what Audible paid me.
Now, obviously, Scribd is different because it's a subscription service, and you’re paying for access to multiple things with that subscription. But saying it is better than libraries is just false because I also showed the numbers for that, and my income from libraries was several times higher than both Scribd and Amazon combined (for audio), which is why authors are always begging people to request their work in libraries.
Libraries pay us better and are usually free. Not always. I know it depends heavily on the country, but for most of my English-speaking audience, that is the case.
Now, this is not to say people shouldn’t use services like Scribd. If Scribd is what you can afford and it gives you access to things your library can’t fantastic. Please continue to access our work through that legal option. I would much rather earn 97 cents than zero.
But uh, yeah, Amazon pays me more than Scrib for digital stuff and I really don’t like when people who aren’t on the author side spread misinformation and frame it as some more “gotcha.”
The sad truth is Most retailers pay us the same or within the same royalty range. The difference I earn between Kobo vs Kindle is literal pennies with Amazon coming out on top. I make my work available on multiple platforms to give people options, but unless you’re buying directly from my personal storefront, it's all roughly the same.
I do actually earn more from Amazon paperbacks than I do any other retailers (for self-pub, paperbacks are a flat rate regardless of how much a retailer is charging), but the difference is about ten cents, so I always tell people to buy from wherever is best for them.
I like bookshop.org because they give some of the profit on their end to indie bookstores. Same with libro.fm for audio.
Audiobooks are just a whole fucking nightmare. Audible sets your price point for you and takes 80% of your royalties. And because Audible does that, I have to then use that price tag on all other platforms or risk being fucked by the algorithm gods. Other audio retailers take about 60-70% in royalties, most of them veering toward 70%.
As we say in radical acceptance therapy, it is what it is—fucking end-stage monopoly driven capitalism.
Now, speaking personally, when it comes to digital media, I earn the most royalties from my Payhip store where I keep 90% of my income.
That's the best place for me.
It's also why it's worth looking up an author you like to see if they have their own storefront. It doesn't help our sales rankings or put us on any bestseller lists, but frankly after launch week, who cares. I’ll take being able to feed me and my dog.
I hope that helps!
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In the last few days, I've now had two run-ins with people on this site regarding the idea of a TTRPG's mechanics and rules impacting the roleplay aspect of said game. And from what I can tell, these people - and people like them - have the whole concept backwards.
I think people who only ever played D&D and games like it, people who never played a Powered by the Apocalypse or Forged in the Dark system, or any other system with narratively-minded mechanics, are under one false impression:
Mechanics exist to restrict.
Seeing how these people argue, what exactly they say, how they reason why "mechanics shouldn't get in the way of roleplaying," that seems to be their core idea: Rules and mechanics are necessary evils that exist solely to "balance" the game by restricting the things both players and GMs can do. The only reasons why someone would want to use mechanics in their RPG is to keep it from devolving into
"I shot you, you're dead!" "No, I'm wearing bulletproof armor!" "I didn't shoot bullets, I shot a laser!" "Well, the armor's also laserproof!" "Nuh-uh, my lasers are so hot that they melt any armor!" "My armor's a material that can't melt!" And so on. Because we have rules, the players can't just say "we beat this challenge", and neither can the GM say "you haven't beaten this challenge." Because the rules are clear, the rules are obvious, the rules tell you what you can and can't do, and that's it.
So obviously, when the idea of mechanics directly interacting with the roleplay - generally seen as the most free and creative part of a TTRPG - seems at best counterintuitive, at worst absolutely wrong. Hearing this idea, people might be inclined to think of a player saying "I'm gonna do X", just for the evil, restrictive mechanics to come in and say "no, you can't just do X! you first have to roll a Do X check! But you also did Y earlier, so you have to roll the Did Y Penalty Die, and if that one comes up higher than your Do X die, you have to look at this table and roll for your Doing X If You Previously Did Y Penalty! But, if you roll double on that roll..."
But like... that's not how it works. Roleplay-oriented mechanics don't exist to restrict people from roleplaying, they're there to encourage people to roleplay!
Let's go with a really good example for this: The flashback mechanic from Blades in the Dark (and games based on Blades in the Dark).
In BitD, you can declare a flashback to an earlier point in time. Could be five minutes ago, could be fifty years ago, doesn't matter. You declare a flashback, you describe the scene, you take some stress (the equivalent of damage) and now you have some kind of edge in the present, justified by what happened in the flashback. For example, in the Steeplechase campaign of the Adventure Zone podcast, there was a scene where the PCs confronted a character who ended up making a scandalous confession. One of the players declared a flashback, establishing that, just before they walked in, his character had pressed the record button on a portable recording device hidden in his inner coat pocket. Boom, now they have a recording of the confession.
How many times have you done something like this in a D&D game? How many times did your DM let you do this? I think for most players, that number is pretty low. And for two reasons:
The first, admittedly, has to do with restrictions. If you could just declare that your character actually stole the key to the door you're in front of in an off-screen moment earlier, that would be pretty bonkers. Insanely powerful. But, because BitD has specific mechanics built around flashbacks, there are restrictions to it, so it's a viable option without being overpowered.
But secondly, I think the far more prevalent reason as to why players in games without bespoke flashback mechanics don't utilize flashbacks is because they simply don't even think of them as an option. And that's another thing mechanics can do: Tell players what they (or their characters) can do!
Like, it's generally accepted that the players only control what their characters do, and the GM has power over everything else. That's a base assumption, so most players would never think of establishing facts about the larger world, the NPCs, etc. But there are games that have explicit mechanics for that!
Let's take Fabula Ultima as another example: In that game, you can get "Fabula Points" through certain means. They can then spend those points to do a variety of things. What's literally the first thing on the list of things Fabula Points let you do? "Alter the Story - Alter an existing element or add a new element." I've heard people use this to decide that one of the enemies their group was just about to fight was actually their character's relative, which allowed them to resolve the situation peacefully. I again ask: In your average D&D session, how likely is it that a player would just say "that guy is my cousin"? And if they did, how likely is it that the GM accepts that? But thanks to the Fabula Point mechanic making this an explicit option, thanks to rules explicitly saying "players are allowed to do this", it opens up so many possibilities for story developments that simply would not happen if the GM was the only one allowed to do these things.
And it's only possible because the mechanics say it is. Just how your wizard casting fireball is only possible because the mechanics say it is.
#ttrpg#ttrpgs#tabletop rpg#tabletop rpgs#blades in the dark#forged in the dark#bitd#fitd#fabula ultima
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Brief crash course for HBomb94 (not Hbomberguy!) + Hermits for those unfamiliar with him:
H is a MCC player and the Sands of Time VOD reviewer. He’s a core member of the MCC community and he’s why players say “Hi HBomb” before SoT
H teams with the hermits frequently to the point it’s a meme: H collects the hermits (he’s teamed with most of the MCC hermits— False, Ren, Grian, Pearl, Cub, Gem, Scar, Impulse) and he gets adopted by the hermits
In MCC, he’s known for having the “H factor” which states his presence boosts his teammates’ scores. He’s a fantastic leader and he keeps the morale up.
H is in Iskall’s Vault Hunters series— this is probably his most direct link to HC. H was invited after Ren met him when they teamed in MCC9, so yeah, that’s part of the Blue Bats’ legacy.
H is a big fan of Hermitcraft and he’s watched many hermits before— there’s more of his fanboying in his watch of Grian’s HC7 world tour
H sometimes teams with hermits outside of MCC in various e-sports events, but most of the team ups are in MCC
H was the one who predicted False popping off in Dodgebolt back in August 2020 when they hadn’t met yet
H was the team leader for MCC9 Blue Bats (H, Fruitberries, False, Ren) and he truly believed in all of them as a team even though False and Ren had gotten 9th like three times in a row, and they had an amazing legendary underdog victory. Probably the best MCC hermit victory ever (but I’m obviously biased haha).
Since then, H has teamed with the hermits many times, and they’ve won multiple times (Blue9 with False and Ren, Aqua20 with Gem, Aqua29 with False and Cub)
He played in irl MCC Twitch Rivals with Scar, Gem and Impulse (and possibly met Tango there in person)
H is a huuuuuge fanboy of the hermits in general and he’s always so proud and happy to team with them. He’s like “IT’S ME AND MY HERMITS! :D”. He’s vocally supportive and encouraging of the hermits in MCC (even when they were underestimated and seen as cannon fodder).
While H is an honorary hermit, it’s a different way from, let’s say, Skizz, because H isn’t in the Life series / Empires, he’s not a builder / redstoner— he’s like the MCC / SoT guy. He’s beloved among the MCC hermits, and the hermits and H are enthusiastic about each other.
Sands of Time and Decked Out have been frequently compared to each other, Grian even mentioned to H at the end of MCC18 that he got his ravager dodging skills from Decked Out 1
H being on HC is very exciting not only because H is a big hermit fan, he’s also not on Life series / Empires like the rest of the guests, so he has less of a connection to Tango personally, but they still invited him ^_^
#hermitcraft#hbomb94#feel free to correct / add anything#i had to stop myself from making this about blue9 but i think it slipped thru#decked out open day
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Someone New 3
No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.
Warnings: this fic will include angst, pining, romcom tropes, and some darker elements later in the series. Some triggers may not be specifically tagged. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This fic will contain explicit content. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: You’ve had a crush on your best friend for years, but you’re slapped in the face with reality when he takes things to the next level with his girlfriend.
Characters: Steve Rogers, Thor
Note: why am I so anxious all the time?
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.
I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖
If Peggy’s party promised everything would change, the ‘yes’ you give to Arturo pays on that promise. Almost at once, everything is different. Your boring, orderly life is suddenly thrown into chaos. You have a hundred worries at once and not enough times; passport, visa, packing, flights. Not too mention all that you’re leaving behind; apartment, furniture, and... friends.
It’ll be good. You keep telling yourself that, just like Arturo, just like Sam. They seem more excited than you are. You struggle to see past the grief of saying goodbye to the life you built there; the life you built around Steve and false hopes. It’s foolish and naive but it still hurts.
And you’re scared. Norway. It’s far away. And you’ll be all alone. You survived college because you found Steve; you could stomach the furor of the city for Sam and Bucky, but on your own, what could you do? You’re not brave or bold or anything like that.
It doesn’t matter. You’re going to work. To forget. Focus on the dig, don’t think about everything else.
You’ve already lost so much. Steve’s busy, you are too. Maybe that’s good. You have to condition yourself for the trip. For a new life. A year is a long time. You feel like the newly graduated teen heading off to college, the one who walked into the wrong lecture hall on that fated day, the one he picked out and put firmly in her place; a friend, just a friend.
As you sort through your closet, tossing fabric into one pile or the other, your music stops playing and your phone buzzes loudly against your nightstand. You hurry to pick it up as that noise makes your neck bristle. You hate it.
You pick up without checking the display. You hope it’s the visa office. No, it’s Sam.
“Hey, chicky poo,” he chirps from the other end.
“Chicky poo?” You echo flatly.
“Hm, you’re right, I’ll keep workshopping,” he chuckles, “so you’re leaving in a week?”
“As long as my paperwork shows up,” you sighs and cross your arm over your middle. You sway as you look around at the clutter of your bedroom. “And I can get all this shit out of my place.”
“When’s your flight?” He asks pointedly. He’s not subtle. Men never are. For years, you’d hoped Steve was being subtle and look how that turned out. You know now he was so obviously not into you.
“Thursday, 5am,” you answer.
“Ah, that’s pretty early to be hungover but it will be worth it.”
“Hungover?” You wonder as you slowly sit on your bed, “why?”
“You’re leaving us so obviously, you need a final hurrah,” he insists, “I’m throwing you a going away party. Just the four of us, unless you have any plus ones?”
“Going away party?”
“Neither of the other jerks are gonna do it,” he scoffs, “nothing fancy, promise. Just some drinks.”
“What about Tuesday? Give me a day to recover?”
“Wednesday works. Steve’ll be back by then.”
“Back by then?” You must sound like a parrot.
“Oh, yeah, the lovers went up north to look at venues for the engagement party. Too bad you won’t make it. I’ll have to drink myself into a stupour all by myself,” he intones.
“Yeah, sorry about that,” you grumble and pick at a wrinkle in your pants.
“Don’t be sorry. You deserve this. I’m so fucking excited for you,” he chimes, “you have to tell me everything. I want pictures of vikings and castles and stuff. All of it.”
“Sam, I’m just going to be digging,” you mutter.
“And? You can’t just go over there an put your head down. Go sightseeing, go out on the town, have a wild one-night stand--”
“Sam,” you drone.
“You need it,” he cackles, “it’ll be a story to bring home with ya. Make us all jealous with your wild Norwegian adventure. Hey,” he pauses and sucks his teeth, “you’re like Uno reversing a whole country. Vikings used to invade others, this is your chance to go right in there and raise hell.”
“You’re stupid,” you laugh and shake your head.
“Never said otherwise.”
“Hm, fine, Wednesday,” you agree, “if I'm gonna be there, I gotta get all this shit packed.”
“Did I not say if you need anything? I can help,” he offers.
“No, no, I got it,” you say, “really, it’s not that much.”
“Right, well, I should get back to it and let you do the same,” he says in a resigned tone.
You hang up and heave. You put the phone down and drop your head into your hands. You feel like you should cry. You’ve felt that tide of tears pushing on your eyes since the party but they just won’t come. All that tension is driving you mad but you just can’t dislodge the nail driven deep into your chest.
💟
Your life is hectic but you’re not surprised Steve isn’t part of the whirlwind. Why would he be? He has so much going on. A wedding is much more important than what could possibly be the most spontaneous and naive decision of your life. Impulsive more than anything. Cowardly when you think about it. You’re running away because you can’t face the truth. Because it’s just easy to leave your emotions in New York.
Still, you thought you’d hear more than this. More than a thumbs up emoji or hearsay from Sam. Even after your conversation on the balcony and his reassurances, you still feel his discontent. Will he really miss you that much or is he just upset you won’t be there to celebrate the love of his life?
It doesn’t matter, does it?
It’s gone so fast and you hope the next year goes just as quickly. That all this passes. Not just the trip but everything else. The sadness, the pain, the fear. You try to be positive. You thought college was scary and look how that turned out.
Ugh, you’re really doing this. You're leaving is all behind. You’re leaving your friends and your family and your home. You have no one to blame but yourself. You could’ve gotten over Steve Rogers a decade ago. More than that. You couldn’t rip the band-aid off, you had to pull it slow so ever hair rends painfully from the flesh.
The GPS guides you between the shining marquee. You can see the pulsing dot of your destination on the screen. You don’t drive towards it, instead hunting for a parking spot among the cramped lots and lined curbs. You should’ve taken a cab but you’re only having one drink and you’re saving for the inevitable expense of hurling yourself halfway across the world.
You get out and grab your phone, your purse hooked over your elbow. You raise the small screen and get your bearings, squinting as you set yourself in the right direction. Just across and at the end.
As you approach the bar, you stop short. This isn’t exactly the flavour. Well, not for them. You peer up at the neon light in the shape of a martini, a bright pink beacon, under which a large group of women cluster. Whoops and hollers go up as they enter and leave you standing out in the technicolour-tinted night. Did you get the address wrong?
You check your messages with Sam. No, it’s correct. Strange. Maybe he didn’t know.
You pull open the violet-shaded glass door and peer around as you step out of the way of the patrons behind you. You text Sam to check if he’s there already. You can’t seem to keep up with the clock hands these days.
As you wait for a response, you glance around. It’s like a Sex and the City reenactment. The guys always teased you for your rants about Carrie Bradshaw’s selfishness. They weren’t much for the genre. With them, it’s sports bars and beers and what ball game is in season. They never notice your cute new earrings or your efforts to spruce up your work clothes with a flashy belt.
‘Here. You’re looking cute.’ Sam’s response comes.
You narrow your eyes and stand on your toes to look around. He’s sitting at a tall table with Bucky, the two of them looking out of place before the feathered centerpiece and glitzy wall art of high heels. You can’t help a grin. This is absolutely ridiculous.
You weave through the tables and bodies, past the bar of gabbing girl groups and a few men mixed in. You near your friends and claim one of the tall stools around the round table. You use the bottom bar to haul yourself up onto the seat and hang your purse from your knee.
“Hey, this place is... sparkly,” you look around with a dumb smile. You can’t help it! You never get a girls’ night.
“It is,” Bucky agrees in a grit.
You stop short. You look at him then at Sam. You didn’t notice before. They’re wearing bows on their heads. Sam has a head band with a gregariously big pink ribbon, whereas Bucky has a glittering purple bow pinned into his thick locks. You laugh and smother it behind your hands.
“What is this?” You snicker.
“We are your ladies tonight!” Sam announces and shifts to stand, bending under the table, “and you get to be queen bee!” He reaches to the floor and you lean to see the huge tote underneath, “here is your tiara!”
He pulls out the plastic tiara with fake pink gems and white feathers. You giggle again as he places it on your head. This is too much.
“Sam! How—this is so stupid. You didn’t have to do all this.”
“What? It’s about time. Don’t worry about us. It’s all about you,” he snaps his finger and points at you, “we’re going to order girly cocktails and dish on the cute dudes.”
Bucky shakes his head as he fixes the bow in his hair, “I wanted a flower.”
You bring your hands down to your next and wiggle on the seat giddily. This is amazing. Your eyes sting and your throat locks up. You’re going to miss these idiots.
“You guys,” you breathe.
“No crying!” Sam claps his hand, “I already got this guy moping around.”
“I’m not moping,” Bucky sniffs.
“We have to decide who’s who. I know you hate Carrie so we’ll save that for Steve. He is the stuck up blond, after all,” Sam smirks, “I’m definitely Samantha, it’s already in my name. And you,” he points at you, “Miranda. The level-headed one who has to put up with our BS. That means Bucky--”
“Charlotte?” Bucky frowns, “can’t I be Stanford?”
You nearly gasp, “Bucky, are you a stan?”
“I’ve seen some episodes,” he shrugs.
“Well, that’s decided,” Sam checks his watch, “where’s that bozo?”
You frown and look around. You look at your phone. You were just on the cusp but Steve is late. Bucky takes out his cell too and all three of you scroll through your screens.
“Whatever, we don’t have to wait for him, drinks,” Sam blacks the screen and sets down his phone. He reaches for the pink pleather drink menu, “I was looking at the Paradise Punch. Sounds interesting.”
“Mm, I’m just having one,” you state, “I gotta drive home.”
“Pfft, don’t worry about it. You can get your car tomorrow.”
“Sam, I leave at five in the morning.”
“Fine, I’ll take care of the car. You’re storing it, aren’t you?”
“I wouldn’t expect--”
“Tonight is going to be fun. No arguing,” he points a long finger at you.
The phone jitters and his phone lights up. He picks it up as your cell remains lifeless in a rare moment of peace, though it’s fraught nonetheless. You peek over at the empty fourth stool.
“He’s not coming,” you utter.
Sam huffs and puts his phone down, “he’s not. Peggy has a work dinner and he’s invited.”
“Oh,” you nod and try not to deflate entirely, “that’s... that’s fine. He said he’d come to the airport but I wasn’t counting on that either.”
“Asshole,” Sam sneers.
“Hey, no,” you shake your head, “he’s busy. He has a wedding and all that--”
“You’re going away,” Bucky surprises you with the emotion in his tone, “and he can’t be here.”
“Really, it’s not--”
“It is,” Sam insists. “How long are you gonna let him walk all over you? Isn’t that why you’re leaving?”
“It’s work, it’s nothing to do with Steve.”
“Sure,” Sam accepts hotly, “keep telling yourself that.” He cringes and swallows, “tonight isn’t about him. For once. It’s about you. Us. Having fun. Saying goodbye. It’s gonna be terrible without you. I hope you know that.”
You could laugh at his rebuke. The conflict between celebratory and reproachful is amusing. You exhale and put your hands up.
“Alright, I got it.”
“Buck,” he gestures to the other man, “go.”
You turn to the Bucky and he slides off his stool. He reaches down under the table and brings up a gift bag. Your mouth falls open. Your chest tweaks, a mixture of glee and guilt. You’re happy to have friends with them but you feel so bad for not seeing it earlier. For being so tunnel-visioned that you couldn’t appreciate them fully.
“This is so—you didn’t have to,” you say.
“We did. Obviously,” Sam scoffs, “don’t worry, my gift is the grand finale.”
“Right,” you smile and accept the bag from Bucky. You push through the tissue paper and pull out the heavy shape inside. You reveal it and just as quickly hide it back in the polka dot bag, “Bucky!”
You let go of the taser and retract your hand. Sam guffaws and Bucky gives a confused grimace, “you need it.”
“What?” You hiss.
“You’re going to be all alone over there. You should be safe.”
“I... appreciate the thought but it’s a bit extreme.”
“He’s right,” Sam adds, “you know, going to the land of the vikings, you can never be too safe. I’ve heard they like to carry women off in their boats.”
“You two,” you roll your eyes.
“My turn,” Sam says, “you’ll love this.”
He once more searches under the table and the tote crinkle. He pulls out an envelope and you tilt your head. Really?
“Money?” You wonder.
“What am I? Your grandma?” He snorts, “here.”
You take the envelope and turn it over. You pull the flap open and reveal a pamphlet within, along with a second slip of paper. A reservation...
“I found this place over there. It’s at some coastal castle, there’s a spa and all that. They do like ancient types of treatments, hot rocks or whatever,” he explains, “I made sure you can adjust the dates too if you need. You just have to call.”
“Wow, that’s... Sam, I’m going to be so busy--”
“I told you not to work yourself too hard. That’s a good excuse for you to get your head out of the dirt. Literally. Just think of me when you’re in a mud bath with a glass of champagne.”
You put the envelope next to the gift bag and drop off the stool. You open your arms to them. Sam is up first and Bucky drags himself to his feet. You wrap them in a hug and they do the same in turn. It must be an absolutely ridiculous sight but you don’t care. You tuck your head against Sam’s arm and feel a rumble in Bucky’s chest.
“Sam, that’s my ass,” Bucky snarls.
“I was just making sure you didn’t forget your wallet,” Sam chuckles.
“You’re a moron,” Bucky pulls away and shoves him.
“Peas in a pod, bud,” Sam lets you go as the hug breaks up, “now, I need a drink and you...” he points in your direction, “need a double.”
#steve rogers#thor#thor x reader#steve rogers x reader#someone new#series#au#fic#grayish fic#angst fic#marvel#mcu#avengers#captain america
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