#OR some magic lady has kidnapped your dad and is holding him hostage. and on top of all of this.

[aroaceleovaldez]

i genuinely think there is so much you can do with the whole concept of “we don’t really know if Leo and Piper were close friends with each other pre-Hera mind meddling.” Like, they probably knew each other for sure, but especially given how absolutely resistant Leo is to being open to Literally Anyone, and how much Leo and Piper were hiding in TLH, they actually probably weren’t super close. Because otherwise they would have told each other, logically.

Can you imagine the dynamic between the Lost Hero trio if that had been acknowledged and played into? How much Piper and Leo would have had to question all of their memories and what was tampered with? Who they actually knew? How close they actually had been with each other, and how they actually felt about Jason? Cause it’s basically never addressed besides a sliver in TLH that they had completely fabricated memories of all three of them! That would have fucked them up so much!

[mrneighbourlove]

The War of Fire: Ch 4. Bloody Rescue

Ganondorf felt incredibly weak. It was like he had beem floating in a wave of nothingness for over a year, trapped in the limbo numbness. As his body bobbed up and down the river, he barely felt something dragging him out. His eyes started to get the colour back into them as he was pulled onto shore.

“W-what?”

“Relax. I think you might have a concussion.”

The King coughed up water, getting more of his senses back. Above him was a teenage girl with pale skin and long black hair. He then recognized her after registering her red piercing eyes. “L-Leere?”

She gave a light hearted smile. “Hey dad. You look like shit. Let me help you get inside.”

Ganondorf felt his head throbbing from pain. His vision was blurry, but even he could see flames rise above the hill in the distance.

~

“Their king is dead! Slay the Hylians!” Hasai warriors of the Skurge tribe surged across the fields of Hyrule at the remaining Hylian forces. Raising their hands, flames shot forward and burned away the battalions, scattering them. Zelda and Klinge had retried back to the castle, and moral was crippled for the defenders.

The Kikai Empire was full of warriors. This was glory. The smell of burning flesh of their enemies was ecstasy. One warrior laughed as he cut through soldiers screaming from the flames that they had been caught up in. The fires rose and shot forth, and the Hasai took more ground.

Ghirahim had lost sight of his master, fearing the worst. Looking down from the cliff side, he watched the Hasai overtake his battalion he had left behind. The bokoblins stood no chance as the Hasai scared them all into a corner. Once they had the monsters trapped, they slowly burned them to death. The magic of these invaders was dangerous indeed. The demon decided that retreating back to the castle would be the best course of action. Taking a horn, he blew it into the air.

Soldiers of Hyrule heard the sound and took notice. This battle was lost. “Retreat! Retreat back to the castle!”

Survivors scrambled to safety, catapult fire raining down on them. The Hasai wouldn’t advance past a certain point, but that didn’t mean they’d allow the forces of Hyrule a clean get away. Men, monsters, and horses flew into the air, fire frying the land. The Hasai shot fire into the air and raised their weapons into the air, giving a roar of victory into the air. They had won this battle.

~

Seras was practically giggling to himself as went back to the main camp. Bellum had Romtan engineers building a heavily fortified base on the valley top near the Gerudo Desert. The Prince was in such a good mood from his victory over Ganondorf that he even greeted the engineers as he passed by. “Good afternoon.”

The Romtan were heavily disturbed by the Prince being so courteous to them, but continued along their work. Seras was even impressed Bellum had quickly upgraded from a simple tent to a fortified cabin of sorts. Entering, the Prince gave a wink to one of the guards. “You’ll want to wait at my bedside after you hear what I have to say.”

Grand Admiral Bellum was calculating his next strike when Seras took the attention of the room. “Prince Seras. I take it your mission was a success?”

“Yes. I, Prince Seras of the Kikai Empire, have successfully killed Ganondorf Dragmire, King of Hyrule!”

Bellum gave a smile, placing his hand firmly on the Prince’s shoulder. He so wanted to Seras to grow out of his immaturity and prejudices he had learned from being a small child. Encouragement was key to change, and this was worth celebrating. “Well done Prince Seras. I am proud of your accomplishment.”

“I live to serve the spirit of the Empire. Our fire will control the world after all.”

“I-I want my mommy.” The sounds of a little girl broke the triumph of the room as T0-D entered with his prize. “Let me go!”

“Statement: Be silent, tiny meatbag.”

Seras grinned, his victory putting him into a twisted sense of happiness. But even he would not tolerate a brat ruining his fun mood. Turning to the little girl, he gave her slap across the face. Before anyone could interject, he launched a small blast of fire on her back. Kanisa gave a loud scream and started to cry from the pain of the tiny burn, until Seras held her mouth close. “Be. Quiet. Or I’ll burn all your hair off. Nod if you understand you little snot.”

Kanisa gave a teary nod. She was completely terrified by the ordeal. If she stayed quiet, she hoped she would see her parents and siblings again.

Grand Admiral Bellum held a light glare at the Prince. “That’s our hostage Prince Seras. Please do well to not harm her anymore. Commander Ordo.”

A Hasai stepped forward, giving a bow. “Yes Grand Admiral?”

“Go take the little Princess to the bunker at Beta-04 as planned. Hold a unit there until further orders. I will send Queen Zelda an order of surrender. If she doesn’t comply, you will execute the child.”

“Yes sir.” The soldier took the little princess and dragged her away to be transported. Kanisa prayed for someone to save her.

Seras was looking around outside for his sister, ecstatic to trade war stories. “Hey, gearhead. Where’s my sister?”

Bellum noticed that his personal Android was awfully quiet. It wasn’t like him. “T0-D. Report.”

“Statement: Princess Zannah was captured by the forces of Hyrule so that I could make my escape with the target.”

Seras’ mouth dropped low, instant disbelief taking over. Bellum’s eyes widened with shock, and even anger. “How can this be?”

“Confirmation: She engaged the Hero of Courage, Link, in one on one combat. The blonde meatbag played unfairly, launching a boomerang from behind as Zannah jumped for her mount. Honestly, it was very much a fluke that she was captured in the first place.”

Seras shook his head in denial. “No. She couldn’t have. She’s perfect.”

Bellum felt the silent fury build up in his heart. This complicated things. “Zannah must not be allowed to be used as a chip against us. I will send someone to deal with her at once.”

The Prince was taken aback by Bellum’s wording. “Deal with? You mean a rescue, correct? Not an assassination?”

“I will do what I must.”

“But-“

“Our duty comes first Prince Seras. Now go rest. You will have a town that needs to be decimated for our next strike in crippling Hyrule.”

Seras left the room, pulling at T0-D’s arm. “You need to go save my sister!”

“Negative: I cannot. Hyrule would be expecting me. I cannot assist.”

“You piece of scrap metal! You left her to die!”

“Correction: She told me to leave. I did not wish to do so, but we had lost our window of opportunity.”

Seras growled louder and louder until he launched a fire bolt into the air. “DAMN IT! I need to do SOMETHING to help her!”

“Observation: You appear to be very angry Seras. If you need assistance, perhaps you should ask your brother?”

The prince visibly turned pale from just the mention of that. “N-no. I won’t. Doing so will completely discredit Zannah and I.”

“Query: Than what will you do?”

“I… I don’t know.”

“Observation: I feel that given your current level of stress, you should relieve your body with one of the females in the camp. Or go on Bellum’s mission. Perhaps killing will help satisfy you. I’m sure Zannah will be able to free herself. She is very skilled.”

“She’s loyal to the kingdom. Which doesn’t mean she’ll want to escape…”

~

Rinku made her way down to the dungeon to see her captive. Having carried a bucket of ice cold water, she threw it on the princess to wake her up. “Hey! Rise and shine!”

Zannah gasped as she was shaken awake by the ice cold water. Moving her limbs, she found herself locked in a cell with some sort of silver gauntlets over her arms, keeping them tight together.

Her instinct were to use fire, however, she found herself unable to. The bonds made it hard to cast.  “Clever girl….”

Rinku was in no mood for small talk or pleasantries. “I want to know where my sister is.”

“Who?”

“The little girl you kidnapped!” The Hylian Hero gripped the bars in fury.

Zannah wasn’t impressed. One with Rinku’s lack of control, but mostly with herself. She had been captured, bringing shame to her family, but more importantly, jeopardizing the success of the war. A dark thought came to her mind, one she held before. In order to save her honour, she’d have to die.

With a cruel smile, Zannah shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t really care. And at this point, she’s most likely dead by now.”

Rinku lost it. Opening the cell door, she walked right in and pushed Zannah against the wall, her hands squeezing around the fiery princess’ neck. “Go to hell!”

As Zannah started to feel her life be squeezed out second by second, Zelda entered the dungeon. “RINKU! STOP!”

Her mother’s voice snapped Rinku out of her wrath, dropping Zannah to the ground. “What?! She may have well got my little sister killed!”

“We can’t kill her. Not now.”

Rinku gripped Zannah by the collar. The Hasai Princess glared at Zelda. Damnit. She really did screw things up. And she was so close to dying too. Gasping for air, she gave a light laugh before speaking. “Nice to see mommy pull your collar. Not that you could kill me so easily.”

Rinku was about the yell back, when Zelda stopped her. “Tell me dear, what is your name?”

“I am Princess Zannah of the Kikai Empire. And I know you well, Queen Zelda of Hyrule.”

The Queen quirked an eyebrow in interest. “I see. Do you have other family here in Hyrule?”

Zannah growled. “Not something I’d tell you.”

“Yeah. She has this real stuck up brother.” Rinku added in. “You and your brother are real pieces of work.”

“You and your entire country can burn.”

“You first.” Both girls locked their menacing glares at each other. “Where’s my sister you bi-“

“Rinku! That’s enough!” Zelda commanded the attention of the room with her authoritative tone. “Now young lady, I’d like to know where you have taken my daughter.”

Zannah shook her head. “That’s a secret I will take to the grave.”

Rinku was about to snap Zannah’s neck. “That can be arranged.”

Klinge entered the dungeon, heavy with news Ghirahim provided him. “Zelda. Ganondorf has been defeated.”

All three woman turned to him, surprise quickly taking over. “Commander. Explain.”

“According to Ghirahim he was overwhelmed by firepower, and he fell into the river. We haven’t found a body. And the Hasai have taken the Hylian Ridge. There forces gather, for what I can only assume is an attack on Hyrule Castle’s west side.”

Zannah gave a grin. Her brother had succeeded in his mission. “So the King of Hyrule is dead…”

Rinku turned back to her. “You’ll find my dad is not so easily killed. Without a body you have no victory yet.”

“We’ll see.”

Klinge turned his attention to the captive in the cell. “So, this is one of the Hasai royals I presume?”

“You presume correct.”

“Where have you taken Princess Kanisa?”

“I won’t speak a word to you.”

“We shall see about that.” Klinge moved past Zelda and Rinku, entering the cell. “I’m sure that you are aware of key staging grounds. And I’d assume that since you attempted to kidnap Princess Kanisa, you would be aware of where you needed to take her.”

Zannah was uncompromising in her silence. “Death before dishonour.”

“There are fates far worse than death my dear.”

Before Zelda or Rinku could stop him, Klinge took his gauntlets, and pressed deep into Zannah’s skull. “Where is her location?”

Zannah screamed aloud, blood quickly draining down her face. “S-STOP!”

Zelda would not stand for this act of barbarism. “Klinge! Stop this at once! Release her!”

“I owe you nothing Zelda.” Klinge plunged a little deeper, twisting his fingers around. “The location!”

Rinku was already grabbing the Master Sword if she needed to use it. “KLINGE! You’re killing her!”

Zelda was ready to cast her magic if she needed to, but she wanted to be diplomatic. “If you respect Ganondorf, you WILL listen to my order! Release her!!!”

Klinge wanted to continue. He wanted to make this girl suffer. His squad was butchered in her mission. She wanted to avenge Samson. But Zelda’s words held onto him more than he expected. Letting go of Zannah, he stepped away. “As you wish…”

Rinku was mad at Zannah for pulling the wool over her eyes, and for taunting her at her failure, but she never wanted this for the Hasai. “Zannah! Just breathe. Don’t fall asleep!”

Zelda and Klinge meet eye to eye, furious at each other. “Commander. We don’t torture our enemies.”

“This is war Zelda. Do you wish to see Kanisa again?”

“Not at the cost of becoming MONSTERS Klinge!”

“I am a monster Zelda. One you made me into.”

Zelda was getting sick of his attitude towards her. He always held this animosity towards her at best, hatred at worst and most felt. “I was not the one who killed you. Leave Commander.”

Klinge walked away, not caring to engage her any further. Once he was gone, Zelda quickly rushed forward to the cell. Raising her hand to Zannah’s head, she focused a spell from her hand, and healed her wounds. “Rinku. Get her some water and a cloth.”

As her daughter went to the next room, Zelda finished up the final touches. “I can’t heal the scars. But no one should see them if you keep growing your beautiful hair.”

Rinku rushed back, quickly using the damp cloth to clean the blood off Zannah’s face. “Don’t lose conscious. Mom is more of a medic than a doctor. She can’t take the pain away, but she’ll stop the damage.”  

Zannah was still in a daze, but the cool water felt good on her face. Confusion filled her mind, however. “Why… why are you being…. so nice to me?”

“We treat others with humility.” Zelda answered softly.

Zannah shook her head. “Go…. We are at war. I’m sorry… but one of us dying is inevitable.”

“I believe otherwise.”

“You hope otherwise.”

“One can have hope in their beliefs, Princess Zannah…”

Rinku was unsure how to cope with this interaction. War was terrible. She tried to reach back into her memories of any lives that took part in open warfare. They were hard to find, and it was painful to look for negative memories. Her thoughts were shaken when a spy waved her over. “I’ll be back in a bit mom. I can’t stay down here.”

“I understand. Get some air out from this awful place.”

Rinku walked away with the spy. “What is it?”

“We think we might have a lead on Princess Kanisa’s whereabouts.”

Rinku nearly screamed out in shock. “Really?!”

“Yes. A Rito spotted Hasai shuffling towards a hidden cave at the Faron Grasslands.”

Rinku nodded, checking her equipment. “I’ll go immediately.”

“Commander Klinge has already headed out.”

“He has? I better hurry to assist him than.” Grabbing her equipment, Rinku could only hope she wouldn’t be too late to save her sister.

~

Klinge had left his horse behind 100 meters back. He moved stealthily through the under growth, making sure the tree line left no room for the sun to reflect off his armour. Stalking through, he finally laid eyes on a Hasai soldier crouched behind a tree. It seemed that they were having the entrance covered. Looking around, the Commander deduced three more soldiers around the perimeter of the entrance. Crawling around, Klinge made his move.

The first guard had no idea Klinge was behind him. The undead gerudo snatched him up and swiftly snapped his neck, turning the head 180 degrees backwards. With his first victim dead, the commander continued sneaking to his next target. Using his knife, the next Hasai felt a hand going over her mouth, than a felt the blade pierce her throat from behind. Her eyes looked down to see the steel poke out her throat, and it was the last sight she ever saw as her head fell to the ground shortly after.

Klinge tossed his body aside and threw the knife into the head of the third one. As the fourth heard some commotion, he turned from his tree to fire an arrow at a target. When he saw no one was there, he went back behind the tree to check his flank. This action was rewarded with a strap of leather going around the tree and the Hasai’s head. Being pulled against the tree, the Hasai screamed and kicked, even launching fire from his hands, but Klinge did not care. The Hasai’s screams grew more grotesque as his skull popped and cracked. Klinge kept pulling, until all he heard was the sickening wet sounds against the tree and felt his target go still.

Inside the cave, Kanisa was crying to herself. The Hasai barely feed her, and they didn’t give her any warmth. The torch light to illuminate the cave was no sun. Commander Ordo was sharpening his weapons and marking his map for invasion points of interest, when a heavy knock came at the door at the end of the hall. All the soldiers turned to the disturbance, not expecting anyone to enter. Ordo rose, pointing to Kanisa. “Get against the wall.”

Turning back to the door, the Hasai summoned flames in their hands and drew weapons. The knocking stopped, and the door creaked open to reveal darkness. In the middle of the darkness, a glowing sword of fire shined from the darkness, illuminating Klinge. He wanted to give these Hasai a taste of their own death that they had come boldly into Hyrule with.

The Hasai were momentarily alarmed by the giant man in black armour. Commander Ordo threw his hand down to give the order of attack. Klinge raised his shield to block the stream of combined fire bolts sent his way. With a swift horizontal swing, he cut the first Hasai in half. Moving to his left, he smashed another soldier into the wall with his shield. The soldier crumpled to the floor, and Klinge lifted his foot to bring it down and crush the skull of his enemy, helmet and all. Running behind a pillar, he threw his shield like a frisbee against the wall.  It bounced off, and the sharp edges flew into the neck of another soldier. With poor luck though, the Hasai didn’t die, garbling blood as he fell to the floor.

Another soldier clashed blades with Klinge. The flames off Klinge’s magic fire sword shimmered. He strong enough to support the blade against another with one hand, and reaching out, he grabbed the enemy by the head, and slammed them against the wall. He continued to do this, before turning them around to take the full brunt of some flames as a human shield. The undead commander kicked the body towards the group using their magic against him. Lifting his blade, Klinge showed no mercy towards the Hasai, hacking them to pieces with his sword. Their screams filled the room, one even catching fire. The undead commander dodged and parried around strikes and bolts, cutting down man after man. One woman screamed as her hand was split in half from her raising a shot of fire, before quickly being silenced.

Commander Ordo couldn’t believe his men were being torn apart. Focusing his energy, he trained his eyes on Klinge’s sword. He was an elite commander of the Skurge tribe. Fire was his element. With the sword being the perfect target, the commander amplified the flames within. Klinge was about to hack into another soldier, when he noticed his blade vibrating. Before he could react, the sword detonated in his face. Flames swarmed over Klinge, and the Hasai Commander cheered. “Got you, you menace!”

As other Hasai approached the burning mass, Klinge jumped from the flames, summoning his great sword. With one swing, he cut through the halves of two soldiers. Without flames on his blade, blood sprayed out from the corpses. Klinge would punish all those who kidnapped Kanisa. With not even a growl, Klinge ran forward, clashing against the Hasai that remained. He took a fire bolt to the side of his chest, but he ignored the pain to push forward. The Hasai could probably manage to burn him away with time, but they had ran out of that the moment he entered the room.

With flick of his finger, an energy spear pierced the head of the soldier that shot him, his body falling towards Kanisa. Soon all that was left to give Klinge a threat was the Hasai Commander. Charging both his hands together, he launched a large steady stream of fire at Klinge. The undead Gerudo threw his great sword, the blade spinning horizontally through the fire and straight into the torso of the Skurge. His red eyes widened as he looked down to see the flames flutter from his hands and the blood leak from his torso. “B-but my conquest.”

Klinge walked forward and raised the man into the air by the blade. “Perhaps you can conquer your personal demons in hell.” With a twist of the blade, the Hasai fell to the ground in half. Klinge turned to find Kanisa, only to discover her hiding in the corner. When he stepped forward, she screamed. “NOOOOOO!!! GO AWAY!!!”

“Kanisa. It’s me, Commander Klinge.”

The young girl didn’t care. To her, this entire experience had been the same. Horrible violence. One incident after the other. This slaughter was no different than the one she witnessed by that awful, awful machine by looking through the key hole. Klinge looked down to see himself covered in blood. He didn’t even notice the arrow that hit his side until it was too late. Groaning, he pulled it out to find Rinku aiming the bow at him. She was shocked to see him, but Kanisa’s screams made her on full alert with shoot first, ask questions later on the mind.

All the bodies were a terrible sight. She knew Klinge was destructive, but this was the first time she ever saw his handy work. There had to be over two dozen bodies in this hall and the last one she passed. Putting her bow away she ran past the Darknut to pick her little sister up. She was quick to shush her and rock her. “It’s me Kanisa. It’s big sis Rinku. I got you. You’re going to safe now. You’re going to see mommy.”

Rinku made sure to hide Kanisa’s eyes from the bodies. As the three of them made it to the outdoors, Rinku took a hard look at Klinge. “You do what you do best. Stay away from Kanisa for now, and you cover my flank.”

Klinge was shocked by the way Kanisa had looked at him. Screamed at him in terror. At Rinku’s command, he could only nod. “Of course…”

Without any delay, the three rode as fast as they could back to Hryule castle.

~ Zannah slept against the wall, when she suddenly heard shifting outside her cell door. A guard fell to the ground, a black eye on his face. Stepping from the shadows, her bodyguard gave a bow. “Princess Zannah. We must hurry.”

“Fisk?”

“Yes Princess Zannah. Are you alright?”

“I think I’ll be.”

Fisk opened her cell door and quickly went to work on her lock. “One moment Princess Zannah.”

“Fisk, how did you get here?”

“Grand Admiral Bellum put in the order for a select group to either rescue or assassinate you. I couldn’t allow the latter to happen, so I decided to act on my own accord.” He finished the last of her locks, setting her down. “I came through the underground and up the sewage under the castle. Had to hurry through. Sensed monsters, but it was much safer than storming the castle.”

Zannah gripped her wrists as she was finally set free. “Thank you Fisk. Your assistance is most appreciated.”

Her bodyguard looked down at the guards that he put unconscious. “Shall we leave no witnesses?”

The Hasai Princess looked down the Hylians, thinking over the kindness Zelda showed her. Shaking her head, she simply walked away. “No. They aren’t worth our time or energy. Take me back to homebase Fisk.”

“Yes Princess Zannah, as you command.”

Princess Zannah gave a silent hope that she wouldn’t have to be the one to kill Zelda. In fact, for a brief moment, she wondered if the fighting was worth it. Her mind tossed those thoughts aside. Must have been the trauma to her head. Her people needed a new home. And they’d use their power to take it. No matter the cost.

Previous Ch. https://mrneighbourlove.tumblr.com/post/183221881656/the-war-of-fire-ch-3-the-kidnapping

Next Ch. https://mrneighbourlove.tumblr.com/post/185219415216/the-war-of-fire-ch-5-tales-of-the-flame

[fictionerd]

Backlog Post: MG Spec-Ops Asuka Ep 4

Good to see you, friends!

I’m glad you stopped by. You see I think I’ve uncovered the secret as to why I’m so torn on this series, particularly in the writing department.

That’s right, Squeenix is involved. Don’t get me wrong I like a fair few of the Final Fantasy games. I really need to finish Bravely Default one day, and FMA is one of the godfathers of anime, but we all have to admit that Squeenix has a troubled history with good stories. Granted, they’re just the manga publishers so it’s not like they’re directly responsible for the writing, but the fact that their name is attached to a product where I’m iffy on the writing just makes too much sense to me.

Now at this point you may be wondering, “Fic, don’t you research the shows you plan to watch?”

To which I can only respond: “I’m a dragon living in an extra-dimensional library in need of occasional maintenance or else other realities start bleeding in,” followed swiftly by, “Of course I do research on the shows I want to watch. Would you like to see that research?”

And that’s how I came to watch Magical Girl Spec-Ops Asuka.

Synopsis: This episode is basically all about the world-plot all the time. Even in so far as the character plot is concerned so no extra synopsis this week. Essentially we pick up where we left off with Sporty having been kidnapped by the Babel Brigands. Things seem like they’re going to get right down to the action, but first we get a flash-back nightmare sequence!

[Cue Wayne’s World Flashback transition]

During the war Magical girl’s actually died. Including the original leader of the Magical Girl team who was named Francine. She actually died in Asuka’s arms since the group hadn’t found her in time for Stalker Nurse to do anything to help. She told Asuka to take over the team and remember that no matter how much horrible shit is in this world it also has beautiful things in it. It’s a really touching scene… Too bad the show doesn’t remember the “there are beautiful things too” bit.

[Flash forward]

So, you want to know what the response of the Police Brass’s response to the kidnapping of a high-ranking officer’s daughter happens to be? What with all the Magical nonsense going on and all you’d think maybe they’d have a response team for this sort of thing. Or maybe they’d open communication with the offending party and offer an exchange of hostages seeing as Mophead Mcterrorist is still kicking around. Or, you know, anything? They are Police even if they do have a different name. I presume they’re still there to protect and serve in some capacity even if that idea isn’t associated with the Japanese police the same way it is in the states. No, that’s not what happens at all.

When the concerned father comes to his superior about the situation concerning his kidnapped daughter what does she tell him?

Allow me to elaborate just a bit. Boss-lady here tells Sporty’s dad that they can’t go up against Mophead’s organization because of the risk they have more killer mascot kaiju which, fair enough, that makes sense. However, she then goes on to say that they can’t go running to the JSDF for help because this is too small an issue. BUT if they let this man’s DAUGHTER DIE then they can get a massive budget from the government which should somehow allow them to overcome giant killer plush-toys.

NO! BAD SHOW! You JUST got done telling us there was beauty in the world worth defending. Oh, right, my mistake you DIDN’T get done telling us that I skipped ahead a bit. No what really followed on the heels of the PTSDream was a scene of Sporty all trussed up while “I need Scissors 61” talks about ‘grilled meat’ a whole lot, and basically works to creep Sporty the fuck out.

Back to the failure of Bureaucracy: At the same time or very nearly to the meeting at the police headquarters, Asuka is being told about the situation and how the Police won’t be intervening. She asks what the super-special-magic combat squad for the SDF is going to do and Cyborg Dude’s all like, “Nothing we can’t act without a police request. BUT if a magical girl were to JUST HAPPEN to SHOW UP OF HER OWN VOLITION and a MAGICAL FIGHT were to break out then the incident might escalate to a point where we would be called on to intervene. HINT. HINT.”

So Asuka and Stalker Nurse say they’re going to head out and OH YEAH this is what I’m talking about. Give us half an epis-

What?

What!?

WHAT!?

Oh yes, friends, we get to spend 4-5 minutes of the episode in the basement with Heckel, Jeckel, “I need scissors 61”, while Sporty is tortured. I suppose I should be fair and say that a large portion of that time is filled with exposition on the villains. The most important tidbit being that this whole operation was aimed at luring out magical girls to take one captive in order to create what ‘I need scissors 61’ calls “A Girl of Mass Destruction”. HOWEVER, we’re still getting all this information while Sporty is stripped down to her… Sporty wear, tied to a wooden horse, and BEING FUCKING TORTURED! Even if it is in small bursts it’s still freaking chilling.

So yeah, we don’t get half an episode of the Magical Girls kicking terrorist ass to rescue their friend. Instead we get to see them take down a grand total of one doorknob, one wire trap, and three guards before they get to the trussed up Sporty.

‘I need scissors 61’ is all like, “Hello my dears I’ll be your transparently evil sadist for the evening. By the way I hope all the bondage and guro fetishists in the audience are getting off on what, for them, must amount to softcore.”

Asuka’s fires back with, “Okay, dirtbag, let our friend go and I won’t kill your ass then send the rest of you to kiss it in hell.”

“Let her go,” Says Scissor-bitch, “Why certainly.”

And she CUTS OFF SPORTY’S LEFT ARM! What grinds my gears the most is that she even makes the stupid fake-cutesy. “Woops I totally meant to cut the chains and missed. Tee-hee.”

So official psycho bitch orders the magical girls to put down their weapons or she’ll straight up decapitate the hostage, and at this point I’m SO happy that these are Magical Girls and not gritty Nineties military characters who would be like “go ahead, princess, make my day”. So Asuka makes a show of dropping her Karambit…. At which point the pair proceed to kick ass. Kurumi fires the massive needle-point on her primary weapon through ‘I need scissors 61’s shoulder pinning her to the wall and through a combination of swift action and a magical flashbang theys coop up Sporty sans one arm and make their getaway.

Naturally Runs-With-Scissors is pissed so she and the Ruski’s (Oh yeah the two people helping her torture an adolescent girl are Russian Mercenary Sorcerers) go and chase after the fleeing magical girls. Asuka stayed behind to try and hold them off, but of course Scissor-girl sics the Ruskis on her and chases after War Nurse on her own. We get a teensy bit more action and expository dialouge and that’s where the episode ends. Now I’ve got some serious…

Thoughts: Now to devil’s advocate it’s not wholly inappropriate that the torture scene take place. I’m bringing prejudice to the table based on what I expect out of a usual Magical Girl Show which is made for a MUCH DIFFERENT target demographic. Honestly along with more fanservice one should go into a Seinen show expecting more grim or edgy aspects to take the forefront. My problem is that those sorts of aspects don’t necessarily make a show more mature.

I guess I’ll never get over it, but Madoka was a perfectly mature take on the Magical Girl template that didn’t need a lot of edgy gory content or blatant spank material. This show seems to not know what the audience for it would want. I came into this thinking “Military Magical Girls in a series whose rating might allow them to actually show the horrors of war? That seems neat.” What I got was a post-war series that doesn’t seem to know if it wants to be about the trauma endured by what effectively child soldiers; a story about a war hero fighting to live a somewhat normal live while realizing the responsibility they have to keep fighting the good fight; pandering to the various circles who would find under-dressed young women attractive; softcore fetish porn; or any of a number of other things.

At the end of the day what did the torture scene serve? What purpose did it have? Was it important to the narrative that we see it? No… No it wasn’t. All it did was show us that one of the Ruski’s has a water Persona and the other likes to heat metal implements and is referred to as a chef. These are things that could have been exposited in combat, and I get that’s more a shounen thing but it doesn’t make the point any less valid. As for the explanation of what Babelfish wanted a Magical Girl for they could have moved that up to when Scissor-girl was tormenting Sporty with grilled meat earlier, or moved back to the classic villainous monologue after our heroes had arrived. If there had been even an iota of reason for the torture scene. Then I probably wouldn’t be this mad, because strong emotional reactions are what I look for to see if a piece of media is doing its job well. Getting angry at a story doesn’t immediately indicate that it’s bad. It’s when you’re mad for reasons other than those specifically written that we have a problem.

I didn’t see the torture scene this episode and think “Those monsters! I want to wring their necks!”

… Okay yes I did, but the problem is that I also asked a question: “Why is this here?”

Having a villain do an evil thing because they are wicked makes sense. SHOWING us them doing said evil thing has to have a narrative reason beyond just “Oh they’re the evil villain!”

Okay… I think I’m starting to repeat myself on that point so let’s talk about the other concern I have. The Flashback PTSDream implies that Asuka is driven to fight by the fact that despite how bad things can be there are still things worth protecting in the world. The problem, as I said in the synopsis, is that the show seems to have missed the memo on that. On the contrary the world is a place where young women get kidnapped and tortured, war heroes can’t get a good night’s sleep, and even the people who SHOULD be the good guys come across as evil schemers.

I know I skipped over the fact that the Police Lady and Cyborg-Scarface were actively manipulating Asuka and Stalker-Nurse into action, but so far as Sporty’s dad knows his boss is someone who’s willing to sacrifice a subordinate’s daughter to get a BUDGET BUMP!

If you’re going to stand on the premise that there are things worth protecting in the world you need to actually SHOW US THOSE THINGS!

“But, Fic, There’s Sporty and Bookish! They’re worth protecting!”

Yes, how very astute. Innocents ARE worth protecting. However, what about the WORLD makes it worth the Magical Girls’ efforts? Where is the beauty that Francine loved? We should have seen at least a sliver of it in this episode.

[Sigh] I stepped away from this post for a while to clear my head and I can’t come up with a positive note to end on. Oh well. I suppose we’ll just have to look forward to other things. Hopefully the future of this show will balance things out, but I know I’ll have fun digging my claws into it regardless.

That said: Until next post keep talking fiction, friends! I’ll see you soon.

P.S.: This week’s Spec-Ops will be posted later this evening. I need to take some time to myself first.

[marcythewerewolf]

Hi! Sorry if this comes across as completely random but I was deep in your writing tag and I saw the Always Faerie AU. I just had to say that I’m incredibly intrigued by it and I was wondering if you had any more headcanons about it that you could share? Or if you aren’t planning on writing it in the future, could you summarize what you had intended to happen in it? Thanks! Love your content!

I already put down some headcanons here, so if you haven’t read those, that’s a good starting place. I actually do have a pretty good sense of where the plot would go, in a broad sense. But rather than give you all bullet points, I’ll try a short fic to start it out and then summarize the general plot from there.

There was no question about it. Helen was gone, and Mark knew three things.

One: He could not tell his mother. She wouldn’t survive another dose of heartbreak.

Two: The Seelie would not help him find her. She was a bother to them, just as much as he was. The Seelie Queen was interested in them, but that interest manifested as little more than occasional indulgence or demand. Nene loved them, in her own way, but she was sworn to the court with faerie vows. She would not disobey.

Three: The world was not kind to people like them. Every moment that passed decreased the chances he’d find Helen alive. The Circle could have her, or the Unseelie, or Lilith herself for all he knew.

Action was needed. Quickly.

“She might be somewhere we haven’t checked yet,” Cristina suggested, as if they hadn’t searched every nook and cranny of the Seelie’s underground abode, and even most of the forest above. “Or maybe she got lost.”

Miach shook his head. “No. No. If she went out she would have left a note- she always leaves a note.”

“Then mayhaps the note was lost,” Kieran said, trying to be soothing and failing. He looked almost as spooked as Mark.

A dull dread filled the pit of Miach’s stomach. “I want to check her room again,” he whispered.

Helen’s room was next to his, two little alcoves off their mother’s sick room that had served them since they were children. But as the lady Nerissa had grown sicker and sicker, Helen had taken over more and more of her old spaces. Her library, her sitting room, both were Helen’s now. Mark had been left only a pantry of herbs, but hadn’t minded much. He’d always preferred exploring to sitting home, stewing in grief.

The box was in the library, hidden behind two scrolls in ancient greek. It took them an hour of searching to find it, another hour his sister could be in peril. By the time Kieran came down with the flat, abalone box, Mark felt bloodless.

“Do you want me to open it?” Cristina asked, because Cristina was kind in a way only people raised out of the courts could be.

“No,” Miach said. Heart aching, he opened the box.

Inside were letters, dozens of them, some on crisp white paper and some on fancy stationary with blue flowers printed on them. All of them looked terribly human, right down to the bubbly handwriting.

Mark felt himself relax. She’d run away with a human then. That was almost safe, almost normal. He could find her, he could bring her home.

(How she’d met her beau was a mystery of its own- neither of Nerissa’s children had ever been allowed outside of Faerie, but there would be time to interrogate her on that later.)

Kieran gasped. “The name,” he whispered, “Miach, read the name.”

At the bottom, in the same girlish handwriting it said:

…It seems now that the world has turned to gold. Even so, all it reminds me of is your hair and your lips

Unfailingly Yours,

Aline

Aline. He had heard that name before.

Kieran hastened to explain. “There was a delegation of Shadowhunters, a year ago.” Long before they had known each other. “They came to the Unseelie Court and said they were visiting the Seelie Queen as well. There was a girl with them by the name of Aline. Aline Penhallow.”Mark’s heart stopped.

He remembered the shadowhunters as well. There had been about five of them, all dressed in black. Nene had tried to keep Alessa and Miach as far away from them as possible but the Seelie Queen had called Helen to court in spite of her protests. Mark, still a child by faerie standards, had remained locked in his room.

Helen had come home looking a bit flushed and harried, but she’d insisted it had all been fine, that the Shadowhunters hadn’t wanted anything to do with her and Mark.

He’d always known his sister could lie, but she’d never lied to him before.

How long had she and this Shadowhunter girl been communicating? How had they planned to stay in touch? How many months had Aline Penhallow planned to lure his sweet, gentle sister into a trap?

Cristina was the one who spoke first. Lightly, she placed a hand on Miach’s shoulder and said, “We should go, now. If we’re going to rescue Helen we’ll need to leave at night, which means we should have been packing ages ago.”

It took a moment for him to realize what she meant, and almost instantly his mind turned to suspicion. “You can’t leave. You’re sworn to the Seelie Queen.”

“Family is more important than oaths,” Cristina declared. “And this is family. Besides, I’m probably human, I’m not expected to behave like a civilized faerie.” That was true, there was more leeway for those with naturally twisted minds, who couldn’t be held to their promises like proper beings. Young changelings and half-faeries were considered to be charity cases, and there was no one to blame but nature if they broke a few promises. At worst she’d get beaten.

It was still a lot to ask of anyone. Miach tried to smile, so she’d know he appreciated it.

“Kieran,” she said, turning to their lover, who seemed trapped in his own private hell. “Can you cover for us here?”

Slowly, the prince turned to look at them. Then, thoughtfully, he said, “No. I can’t. I’m coming with you.”

Kieran would get worse than beaten if he tried to escape. Hostages weren’t something either court took lightly. Miach grabbed his hands. “You don’t mean that.”

“I do. I’m tired of being a pawn. I can leave the court with the two of you, the magic binding me allows it, and they won’t be able to modify that at a distance. There are no oaths restricting me. One might even argue that I’m obligated to try to escape.”

One might, Mark thought, but few would. It wasn’t a plea that would hold up well in any trial.

Escaping with a prince put them all in more danger. On the other hand, Kieran was more powerful and more skilled at combat than either of them, and if they wanted to rescue Helen they’d need someone who could actually wield a sword.

He turned to Cristina. “It’s your call.” She was the second most likely to suffer the consequences, if they were caught.

Cristina added her hands to theirs, making more of a determined mound than a desperate hold. “We’re better together,” she said.

Neither of them were prepared to argue with her.

Most of the story I have sketched out involves trying to find Helen (and later Aline, since they both got kidnapped together and the Penhallows made them promise to rescue them both). But since the Circle is pretty good at shielding, they have to use some very roundabout methods to try to track them down- first they talk to Aline’s family, then Cristina’s family, then moving onto Kieran’s, then the entire Downworld, and so on. 

It’s evolves into sort of a globe trotting semi-heist as they search for ingredients to make the elusive perfect tracking spell that Mark has only heard written about. 

Also they have to stay one step ahead of the Seelie knights looking for them. 

And it’s a race against time cause who knows what the Circle is planning to do with Helen and Aline. (Spoiler: Helen actually has a pretty good handle on it and is leveraging some of her magical knowledge for protection.)

Jia Penhallow recognizes Cristina but doesn’t tell her. She does tell the Rosales family who are now searching for this faerie raised girl they thought they lost years ago. 

Cristina’s faerie family panics when they hear she met Shadowhunters and try to smother Mark in rose petals. 

Kieran’s family is proud of him for the first time in his life (Made off with two Seelie courtiers! Atta boy!) but does try to keep them, to gain the upper hand on the Seelie Court. They end up having to fight their way out. 

When they barter their way into the siege situation Spiral Labyrinth, Malcolm Fade hears the name Blackthorn and has a panic attack and then Catarina Loss makes everyone hot chocolate. 

They have a cute dinner on the Strip while trying to figure out their way into the Shadowworld Market. Then Johnny Rook reveals that Mark’s dad is alive and throws even more drama on the family fire. 

Their last stop is the Wild Hunt, because they need an ingredient from Gwyn ap Nudd himself. It’s terrifying and also a learning experience for everyone. 

Finally they’re ready to break into Valentine’s HQ, but in the course of traipsing around two worlds to figure out where it is they realized how woefully unprepared they are to fight the Circle. So they last minute find some allies in the families they’ve lost. Andrew Blackthorn just found out he had a daughter an hour ago and he’s ready to call in some favors for her. 

Climactic battle. Secrets revealed. Helen and Aline refuse to be parted. So on and so forth. Very standard, heroic story. But during all the camping out in the woods of faerie and finding a hotel room in LA, Mark, Cristina, Kieran are still struggling with their relationship, which started out as a way to pass the time and make friends but is now something much more. 

They were all raised by faeries and they’re very good at passion and pretty words, but not super great at navigating complicated emotional pasts, or talking about feelings honestly. 

In the end, can they stay together? Will they stay together?

(Of course, duh. I think they end up with the Rosales long term, though Kieran might go to the Wild Hunt and just be a very long distance boyfriend.)

[leightaylorwrites]

Leigh Dissects YA fiction: Fallen Kingdoms (Chapter Nineteen- Chapter Twenty-two)

Chapter 19 - Limeros

“I think you have the potential for greatness, even if you don’t believe it yourself.”

The fact that Magnus literally means “great” in Latin makes this mini-splooge even more annoying.

“Are you sure? [...] I think you’re lying.”

“I’m not. What I am sure about is that I’d like you to leave my chambers.”

The way this is worded makes it seem like Magnus could be answering her question of “are you sure” when he’s actually saying he’s not lying. I feel like the editor should’ve caught this.

“I grow lonely.” Again she walked slowly around him. Her gaze felt weighted and uncomfortable. “And I know that you’re also lonely.”

What the fuck is up with this family?

“The same thing that I suggested to your father when he was not much older than you. I’m offering myself to you as a lover.”

White people.

“You’re old enough to be my mother.” “Age can be an asset, Magnus. With age comes experience. You are young and, apart from that maid and perhaps a handful of other meaningless girls, you have no experience.”

“You have no idea how much experience I have.”

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

“Sharing a mistress with my father doesn’t sound like a very good way to help strengthen our father-son bond.

I’m……

She kissed him until she realized that he wasn’t kissing her in return. She stepped back and looked up at him with confusion. “Is there a problem?”

Uh, you’re boning his dad????????

“I suppose for someone already lusting after his own sister, I’m not all that surprised.”

Drag him.

Here comes a rather long quote.

“My younger sister Jana was gifted with sight - a rare thing for a common witch. Within herself, she held the ability to read the tales the stars can tell. She believed in the prophecy, passed down from generation to generation, that one day a child would be born who would hold elementia within her greater than anyone since the original sorceress, Eva - she whom my kind worship as you worship your goddess [...] Sixteen years ago, Jana saw the birth heralded in the stars. Lucia’s birth. Together, my sister and I combined our magic to increase its power tenfold in order to locate her, knowing she would need our guidance one day when her magic finally awakened within her. My sister perished in the quest, but I brought Lucia here to Limeros to be raised as a princess… and as your sister.”

In ONE paragraph, we erased the need for the prologue so WHY is the prologue in this book still? The only difference between the prologue and this paragraph is that the prologue shows us Sabina killing Jana, whereas here, Sabina just saying Jana died. Given that Jana’s death only raises more questions that I know won’t be answered (why would Sabina kill the person who could teach Lucia the other two elements?), this whole thing is a jumbled mess of choosing tropes, cliches, and aesthetics over good writing.

“She’s not your sister.”

Cool motive, still incest.

[Sabina] lashed out and hit Magnus again. He snarled at her; his fist was so tight that Lucia was certain he would strike back. If Sabina was not a woman, she was certain he wouldn’t have hesitated.

Fellas, if a woman has hit you TWICE, you have the right to knock her ass out.

[Sabina’s] skull shattered against the hard surface [...] “Your… air magic… it’s even stronger than I thought.”

HOW IS SHE STILL ALIVE WITH A SHATTERED SKULL??

Her brother’s attention was on the door - now fully open. Standing there was her father.

With all this commotion and fighting, NOBODY heard anything until their father showed up? You were SLAMMING people around??

Chapter 20 - the sanctuary

In recent months, he’d despaired that he was wrong and had been following a girl who held no magic within her.

But before today, wouldn’t he know she was at least a witch, even if he didn’t know she’s a sorceress? He’s known she has magic for a while now.

It was another elder, Danaus. While all Watchers held the same eternal youth, the same level of beauty, Ioannes had always felt that there was something dark and sinister about Danaus lurking just beneath the surface. Danaus had never done anything that went beyond the unspoken rules of the Sancturary. But there was still… something. Something that Ioannes didn’t trust.

Perhaps it’s the fact that he’s named for a figure in Egyptian mythology and we can’t have the one explicitly black character be anything but sinister, dark, and shady.

What he’d discovered had to be protected. At any cost.

So he’s not going to tell his bosses that Lucia is an awakened sorceress because of SUBCONFLICT!

Chapter 21 - Paelsia

[...] to prove to himself that it couldn’t be Princess Cleiona.

How does Jonas know her full name? I get Magnus knowing it because they’re both heirs but Jonas is a peasant so what reason could he have for knowing the proper name for a foreign princess.

“A sixteen-year-old spy? Who is also a princess? Please.”

ToG is scared.

How bold and disrespectful she was - this princess who saw no harm in coming to the same place where she’d caused such pain and suffering.

Again, Jonas proves he’s the only relevant character in this story.

“What better than to have the king’s own daughter if the negotiations go awry?” Jonas said.

DEADASS THE ONLY SMART CHARACTER HERE. I know the author won’t put CEO in actual danger that she lowkey deserves to be in but if someone a bit more daring wrote this book, CEO being a hostage is exactly how this book would play out.

Chapter 22 - Paelsia

Time for hands down the WORST chapter in the book, where CEO finally is confronted by my angel son Jonas.

She would make sure that the old woman would be sent money and gifts for coming to their aid last night.

So a random old white lady gives you dinner and tells you some boring exposition and you’re going to shower her with riches but you’ll do nothing about the countless impoverished PoC you’ve seen? Cool.

“I’ll stay for a while. And I’ll do whatever I can to find information on this Watcher you’re convinced is hiding out somewhere in this land.”

LITERALLY, Nic just said what I suggested chapters ago, which SHOULD HAVE been the first plan. The only reason he didn’t figure this out earlier is because the author needed CEO to be there for the exposplooge ugh

“Very well. Have it your way. You can be the hero.”

Because we’ve got to let the man be the hero and think of this obvious solution. We couldn’t have CEO decide to send him to Paelsia when they were still in Auranos because then we’d have to acknowledge that men and women can be heroes in different ways and well, this book can’t have such nice things.

“Are you saying that you care for him? That his death might cause you pain?”

“Let him go right now!”

“Why should I?”

YES JONAS DRAG THAT BITCH

She had to remain calm so she could negotiate with this heathen.

You let his brother be murdered so you could keep your clean reputation.

“I can give you plenty of money if you spare his life.”

His expression turned to ice. “Money? How about fourteen Auranian centimos for each case of wine? Sounds fair, doesn’t it?”

BODIED

“You won’t get far, but you can try. It would be a moment of bravery for such a cowardly girl.”

She glared at him. “If you think I’m cowardly, you know nothing about me.”

YOU LET HIS BROTHER DIE BECAUSE YOU WERE TOO MUCH OF A PUNK ASS BITCH TO STOP YOUR DUDEBRO

“And I was wrong not to stop [the murder] when I had the chance.”

Yes, hello, that’s called being a coward.

“Shocking,” he said. “Maybe there’s more to you than beauty and a shallow personality.”

There’s really… not.

“I’ve heard what happens to girls who are kidnapped by savages.”

This book is literally so racist.

“Is that really what you think of me? A savage? How Auranian of you. I could just kill him, you know. I’m bargaining with you because I’m no savage. Unlike you and your friend who killed my brother.”

Mortal Kombat voice: finish her!!!

“Now take that blade away from his throat or you’ll be very, very sorry, you scum-sucking son of a pig.”

Again with the racism.

Also, very, VERY.

What she despaired about wasn’t that she’d fallen into the clutches of a savage boy who was willing to kill without a second thought.

BUT HE JUST HESITATED TO KILL YOU

“I’m surprised you’d even bother to use my royal title. It’s obvious you don’t respect it.”

You’re not his queen, he has no reason to respect you, you helped KILL his brother.

“That term [savage] seemed to bother you. Why? Are you afraid it’s true? Or do you consider yourself more refined than that?”

He literally just told you that he’s above being a savage, you racist clump of white garbage.

“I’d think someone like you would relish any chance to spill blood.”

This entire chapter is one racist line after another.

Here’s another long passage.

A brown rabbit darted in front of them and into a meadow with tall grass - surprisingly green for this otherwise faded, dreary landscape. She didn’t ask any more questions. She knew he wouldn’t answer them. And she didn’t want to risk losing her tongue.

Finally, fooled by her suddenly calm demeanor, Jonas let go of her arm long enough to wipe the back of his hand across his forehead.

Without a moment’s hesitation, she bolted away from him, feet quick as the rabbit’s as she left the path and burst into wide, grassy meadows.

Yes that entire section just metaphor-splooged all over this book, comparing CEO to a rabbit in a ~faded, dreary landscape~ running off to a grassy, green place. It wouldn’t be so bad if the author hadn’t LITERALLY compared her to the rabbit. We get it. You read a sparksnotes on metaphors and decided to put one in your book, even if it doesn’t serve any purpose.

[...] she stumbled, fell, and slammed her head against a chunk of stone protruding from the earth.

Yeah, no she’s dead. What’s up with these characters and surviving blunt force trauma so easily?

This girl was a snake.

Every time Jonas drags CEO, I just wanna smile.

He couldn’t deny that she was lovely… maybe even the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen.

Jonas honey I’m so sorry this author wants you to be a splooge victim too.

Long passage alert

Then he felt her throat for a pulse. There was one.

“Too bad,” he breathed, although part of him was deeply relieved. He studied her face, pushing the silky hair back from it. She was tiny, a foot shorter than him and at least seventy pounds lighter. Her pale lavender dress was made from the finest silk - he’d never seen anything like it before. She wore tiny blue sapphires in her pierced ears and a green stone ring on her finger, but that was the sum total of her jewelry. Smart, since any flashier jewelry to go along with her fine clothes would have undoubtedly made her more of a target for thieves. Her face was free of the paint Laelia wore, but her cheeks were still bright and sun-kissed and her lips the color of roses. Unconscious, she didn’t seem nearly the cold, manipulative, rich bitch he’d fully decided she was.

My poor baby, my innocent sunflower angel, my sweet Jonas just spent a long ass paragraph having to splooge over CEO because we can’t have one man in this story not splooge over her. Someone save Jonas from this white hetero trash fire.

Just as he’d begun to think she was harmless and vulnerable, the beautiful snake had managed to sharpen her fangs.

Stop this.

She got up awkwardly, keeping the dagger trained on him, and retreated to the other side of the stone wheel that she’d fallen over.

HOW is she only walking awkwardly after hitting her head on a STONE????? She should be DEAD.

“But I’m planning to cut you if you come any closer.”

The girl’s tongue was a thousand times more dangerous than any weapon in her possession.

Because she said she’d cut him? EDGY!!!!!

He increased the pressure on her throat and stared down into the face of the girl who’d stood by her fiance’s side as his brother bled to death.

So he’s choking her to death, which she deserves, but we know she’s not going to die. However, if this turns into a romance later on, I’m giving up on YA books.

“All you look at me is something evil. But I’m not evil.”

Wow CEO it’s almost like you call him a savage every chance you get. So that’s cool but him LOOKING at you wrong is a problem? Cool.

At first glance, she appeared so small and fragile - but the princess possessed a fierce and fiery core that could burn anyone who got too close.

All she’s done since Jonas met her is whine, be a racist, hit her head, and threaten to cut him.

She was lucky she was only dealing with a bit of dizziness after knocking herself out. It could have been much worse.

She was unconscious after hitting her head on a stone and the author thinks the only problem she’ll have is being dizzy. If this comes back later on as a problem for CEO, I’ll give it a pass but it currently feels like bad writing.

“You are a horrible savage for keeping me here. My father will have your head for this.”

WHAT the FUCK

Jonas took hold of her throat again and pressed her up against the wall.

Stop teasing me and just KILL her already.

“And I’m not an evil bitch who rejoices in the deaths of others.”

You let an innocent man die so people wouldn’t know you’re not a virgin.