#OR LOSE WEIGHT TOO LMAO
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lol do u ever stop and think about how women weren’t required to be included in clinical research until 1993 so a lot of us have underlying health issues that we’ll never be diagnosed with or have sufficient treatment for
#like why is it so hard to get a pcos diagnosis#and then when you do the solution is birth control lol#which doesn’t even help really it just masks the symptoms#and like#there are different types of pcos#yet it’s all treated as the same#🤧#cysters assemble!!!!#OR LOSE WEIGHT TOO LMAO#THATS ALWAYS THE WHAT THEY SAY TO WOMEN#as if#one of the main symptoms of pcos is not#…inability to lose weight
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phone studies 🎉 you know the tan line from either ruoye or the cursed shackle would be AWFUL
#i have so much love in my heart for tgcf fanartists but if i see one more twink xie lian im gonna lose it#xie lian has no scars cause godhood heals them all#hua cheng has many - lots of stuff from before he died#including his death wound (which i guess was a sword to the chest because jun wu stabs him there later)#and then he has an additional one on his eye and his top scars#idc. eming being born after he tore out his eye#and then being doubly a part of his own blood / self transformation/determination because he used it for top surgery#is funny and also VERY on theme#[waves hands vaguely] people who like men are welcome to go bananas on this one#me rubbing my hands together and laughing evilly when i get to use my figure drawing skills on my blorbos#btw a good reference for xie lians body type is ufc fighters#not too bulky its functional fitness built to kick ass and lift stuff#i also personally think both of hualian would gain weight after getting together cause theyd start eating more meals :)#edited cause i forgot his tattoo LMAO#tgcf#my art#hua cheng#xie lian#hualian#study#tian guan ci fu#mxtx#hob#heaven official's blessing#figure drawing
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staring at my face in the passenger mirror n trying not 2 cry why do i liike like That,,, , why is my face so pulled down why does it all have to make shadows like that i look So old
#i feel like i always have. ive always looked like i am 90yrs old LMAO. . ...... h#even when i was a kid & skinny enough u could see my chest bones i still had a huge round head#which btw it is so strange to see pictures of me looking like that#because i swear i have always been chubby#i remember my family always saying how i was the fat one#i was filled w baby fat i needed to lose#and i remember being that kid so vividly but looking so different n hating myself for it#and sneaking to the fridge 2 literally stuff my face with as much vegetables as i could find because i thought thats how u lost weight#bc i was too young to understand
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I’m so glad I dont feel shame about eating anymore I just housed a slice of cbr pizza and peanut butter chocolate pie and then my brother in law gave me chicken alfredo. I feel like the multifandom enjoyer except with food
#even just a few months ago i really hated my body#was always at the gym and barely eating bc i wanted to lose weight so bad#but idk these days i actually like my body for the first time?? ever??#its nice#like the only negative thing i feel about eating anymore is when i eat too much and feel tired#like how i feel right now lmao#riah speaks
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at this point I’m not even hiding my disorder from some of my more mentally ill friends bc I kinda like seeing them worried about me
#It’s a shitty thing to say but I do#Makes me feel like I’m a true Ana girlie#Having people be worried that I’m not eating enough and that I’m losing weight too fast#There’s this one boy that likes me but I don’t like him#So I’m slowly scaring him away by commenting on my disorder lmao#@n@blr#@na blog#⭐️ ing motivation#⭐️rving#@n@ tips#i wanna be perfect#i wanna be sk1nn1#light as a feather#⭐️ve#@na motivation
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Maybe I don’t want to have my cake and eat it too… maybe I want a sacrifice to actually mean something in this game
#emmrich personal quest ranting#lmao#I’ll never be over the lich thing#everyone treats it as some sans undertale skeleton fanfiction goofiness#but like dude. can we as emmrichmancers not recon with the fact that we’ll literally have to send him to die#that we’ll lose his body and all that comes with it (warmth. touch. comfort. yes sex too.)#in a game abt the tyranny of immortals and the weight of their regrets. we’re really ok with sending our love into immortality#at the cost of what he loves#T_T does anyone see it hello it’s so dark in here#emmyposting#dav spoilers
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Can you tell another rapebait story?!? In full detail please?? I get off to this and you just are the best
aww well sadly, my most successful one is the one that's up already lol my previous rape baits were less intense and only resulted in groping and fingering haha I'm actually really shy and introverted irl so it takes a lot for me to go out alone😥 but I plan to have more rapebait outings in the next few months so stay tuned for those attempts😇
#i had one really bad attempt one day bc i didnt get drunk enough fast enough and got too anxious being alone so i left early lmao#also i was trying to lose some more weight before going out again bc im an insecure little bitch lol#but im down over 10lbs so im hoping a few more months will get me right😶🌫️#answered
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#just need to vent rq lololol#my wedding lehenga came out so freaking beautiful#but it needs to be taken in a lot like. i lost 6 inches on my waist since i initially had it made for my body#and everyone at the shop was like ohh wow good job great you look so great now you look awesome#and my mom was like oh wow good job that’s good you did it#like lol#i wanted to just be like#‘thanks i had to go to iop therapy at an ed center where they literlaly taught me how to eat food. like a toddler. thanks’#like i didn’t lose weight for an intentional reason but thanks for confirming you thought i looked horrible before lolol#idk i have been like every size in the book but seeing how much better ppl treat me when im smaller#i’m just like. :)#if my mom says anything about her body or mine tomorrow i will probably fucking lose it and if you see a woman in nj killing ppl on the news#it’s me. lol#it just really took me out of the experience bc i’m trying sooooo hard to be neutral about my body. and like. i don’t need to hear your#thoughts abt what i look like lmao#whatever my dress is beautiful and i’m so beautiful and i’m excited but i really do think i should be able to hunt ppl for sport#leave me alone#nothing you do can please ppl#when i was 20 and 100 lbs and killing myself and sick and miserable every single day my mom was also just like#wow you look great#meanwhile i was balding and fainting at the gym and failing my college classes bc i was obsessed w my body#text#also look at these cats that are just in luis’s apartment’s hallway like rofl who let them out of their apt!!!! so cute#my mom saying ‘you did it’ as if i was trying to do something made me lol#i wasn’t TRYING to do anything i just am healing my relationship w food and my body#bc i refuse to waste my entire life being bitter and miserable and ashamed of existing#like SOMEONE i know….#anyway this could be you too! if you went to fucking therapy!#i ate ny pizza out of spite after all of this#sorry some of you can’t enjoy a fucking carb !!!!!
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I'm seriously going to need to rewatch The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel soon, because that final season? FUCKING. FANTASTIC.
after so many disappointments when it comes to female characters' arcs this show (that I enjoyed but wouldn't have claimed among my favourites) has truly delivered for Midge and Susie, and Midge&Susie, beyond my expectations.
so, yeah, I'll definitely want to watch it again and see how everything holds up in light of this.
#susie's whole EVERYTHING hits particularly close to home. but so does midge with her artistic aspirations#so each of their arcs were immensely satisfying for ME. personally#and the focus on their partnership and life-long bond was truly something else#i also loved a lot of what they did with more secondary charact#mei was written out after one scene but it was a scene that healed my lane-related gilmore girls issues lmao#the stuff about esther and midge's parents was great too#i had some issues here and there in previous seasons but i think there's a good chance#they'll be the type of thing that will lose weight after such an ending#talking to the void#the marvelous mrs. maisel#tmmm thoughts#my thoughts#midge maisel#susie myerson#smidge
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got a little 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 and ate 262.5 more cals than i intended to
#kill me. genuinely kill me#i feel so sick#im so fucking disgusting#ive eaten 955 cals today!!! woohoo!!! way too fucking many!!! 305 over my limit!!!!#and i walked a lot today but i dont have the count so im telling myself i burnt 100 cals but i dont know#so even with that my net would be 855#way too fucking many#this is my worst restriction day since my relapse#aside from the 2 binge days#this is literally the most calories ive eaten#meant to do low res#ended up with high res#isnt that fucked up#lmao#i hope i still lose weight fml#whats even more fucked up is the fact that ive only eaten half a subway sandwich#2 eggs#and 1 pancake#and all of that adds up to such a high number#its fucking criminal that things are allowed to be so high cal#i wanna shoot myself i was doing so good but i just had to eat 3/4 more of a pancake than i wanted to#fml#i just want to burn all this shit off me but im out of town and cant#i cant wait to weigh myself when i get home#i should have brought my fucking scale#fuck my life
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wow friends it got to the point where almost everyday I notice things that make my heart and stomach sink and I feel so nauseous that I don't even want to eat or get out from my bed, that's wonderful!
#I mean at least I can lose weight quickly lmao#also on another note the whole 3 month backpay is stressing me out so much#I'm so tired#can someone just throw me under a train or smth since I'm too much of a coward#thoughts#― rea's thoughts 💭
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i think id sell my soul to feel welcome in a friend group
#vent tag#vent in tags#cw vent#its not even a Them problem anymore i think its my fault#im too quiet and awkward and nobody really notices my presence or cares to do that#i tried putting on makeup and losing weight to see if appeareance was tje problem#didnt work LMAO am i that repugnant#my mom tells me everytime that its a me problem and that i exclude myself#but everytime i speak in my school friend group everyone ignores me or shuts up#i dont want this anymire#i dint want this i hate this
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talk to my crush today 😍😍😍 (i ask to borrow his pencil)
#he got the prettiest eyes i've ever seen jknfjfj#like just looking from afar they look so pretty but when i see them up close ijneffjnefnjf#too bad i was a fumbling mess lmao 😭#what a bad first impression fr#but yeah#God man he's soooooo ugh#my face was red as a tomato when i approached him i-#aaahhhh stupid stupid stupid#too bad i'm ugly as all hell so i can't approach him properly just yet#i need to lose so much weight for him#thank you ms. Smart i was wrong about you 🙏#i won't ever talk bad about you again i promise 🤗#and his voiceeee#oh his voice is so nice to listen to...#it's like deep but very soothing to listen to#aghhhh i'm so done for#it was the right idea to choose human anatomy this year 😌
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#me not wanting to buy new pants because I mighttttt lose weight is kinda dumb#my bestie told me to stop that#she said the amount of time and effort and work it would take to really drop a couple of Jean sizes is not going to happen as quickly#as I think#and that#is oddly liberating to me#like fuck it#I’m going to get rid of the pants that legit do not fit anymore#and I’m going to just buy things that DO FIT#wild fucking concept#anyways body image was hard as fuck before having a baby and afterwards it’s even worse#like no one told me I would be suffering this much?? lmao#I feel inadequate 95% of the time#about everything honestly#and I don’t feel like I know myself anymore#it’s genuinely such a strange time in my life#like im not mentally well but here I am thinking huh you should try and lose weight too#like fuck off man why you gotta do that
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#vent post vent post lalalala#i wanted to post some pictures from my weekend trip with my friends before its too late but then i saw my fucking face and now i wanna kms#like oh my god. oh my god this is really truly the face im stuck with forever and ever and ever till the day im fuckin rotting in the groun#incredible how unfair life can be lmao (<- girl who is having such incredibly superficial stupid fucking problems but is otherwise#quite privileged but of course that will never be fucking enough for her because she's soooooo fckn stupid and selfish and annoyinggg lol)#i dont know why im so obsessed with it now#like i genuinely remember KNOWING that im kinda ugly (and fat) in high school and being like 'so what lol idc'#so WHY is it such an issue now?????#idk. i just kinda wish i was dead every time i look at my face and realise there's nothing i can do to change it#i can dress in ways that will cover my ugly ass shapeless body. maybe i can even go back to my ed properly this time#and lose some weight. for a time. before i gain back twice as much and the circle begins anew lol#but my face is not gonna change no matter what i do lmao unless i fucking scrape it off with a grater or smash my head into pieces#and like. even if i do get that rhinoplasty (its not gonna change my faceshape anyway. nothing i can do to fix THAT fuckin atrocity)#every time ill look in the mirror i will only be reminded that its fake. and that my natural face was disgusting enough it had to be cut up#to be fixed somewhat.#i just wish i had ONE. just ONE nice thing about my body. literally just one its not even funny lol#and its so fucked up when you look at my mom who was so insanely fucking beautiful when she was my age. like. i cant blame her#cause how could she have known that the genes she'll pass on will not result in anything good lol but also i feel like such a failure#like its not really my fault i got the genes i got. but yknow.#anyway im tired of always being the ugliest person in any group im hanging out with. my cousins? check. my hometown friends? check.#my uni friends? my GOD check (how ARE they all so pretty and skinny??? insane).#god i wish i were dead. like fr fr. im not actively suicidal since i cant bring myself to *do* shit anyway. but i just wish i never existed
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remember how i wanted avoid the gas station bc the guy who worked there that was obsessed with me? yeah well it’s flipped and he gone and now it’s the opposite 🤣🤣 there is a guy that works there and I’ve been goin every chance I get but he a man of very few words *he also doesn’t speak a lot of English and I don’t speak his language so 🤣* and i need him to be obsessed with me so I can be like “yes, a kiss? You can have all of them” 🤣🤣🤣
#im losing weight again#the pimp in me will return#she comin#jking but i wanna get laid#pimping is too much work#i barely even text my friends back idk how people just be havin a line up and flip flopping through out the day#sounds exhausting#in the past tense of my life where people said I had hoes I was exhausted 🤣🤣 and I only had like two hoes lmao#guess we’ll see where life takes me 🤣🤣🤣
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