#Not all those who wander are Instagram influencers

[alacritousliving]

I have literally done this. I have to acclimate after coming up for air from a Brit Lit novel - otherwise I get the British Bends

The thing is you read too much 19th century Brit Lit and that's literally just how you start to talk. Was speaking with a friend about another friend and I said "he's very agreeable, but he lacks discernment" like that was in any way a normal way to phrase that sentiment.

[kuiinncedes]

c:

[the-changeling-manor]

Genesis

2024. Yes, it’s 2024. It’s only 2024. The future of humanity will be greatly influenced by this decade, both politically and culturally. But a subject that splits the opinions of all, transcending politics and culture, is defined in two words: artificial intelligence.

Artificial intelligence is currently in its infancy.

The ia coupled with chronivac technology could offer infinite possibilities to the users of the software, which is so known to transformation lovers, but yet so impossible to reach. Imagine the chronivac capable of thinking on its own to interpret a prompt, imagine the chronivac capable of analyzing the world around it simply by wandering on the networks, and imagine the chronivac capable of satisfying your desires just with a photo.

It’s just a Dream. Imagination. Unreal.

Isn’t that right? Well.... Don’t be so sure.

——————————————————————

Think about this guy. He’s like you and me. I even think he's one of you who reads these words. Brown hair, thirty years old, young gay, it’s a kind of "mister everyone" in this community of male transformations, which besides will not even be named or represented by a photo, since I know that this guy is you. 

Indeed, every night, he connects on tumblr and reads these stories where people change to become the ones they dream of being, whether they are serious or only in the context of fantasy.

He reads stories, more or less exciting, sometimes redundant because full of clichés, the story you read is also a mountain of clichés, I guess. This ordinary guy is enjoying this moment. He is happy, even though he knows he will never be able to live it.

He is deeply sad.

He receives a notification. Someone who sends him a message on tumblr precisely. He thought it was still one of those bots that redirected to adult sites. Yeah you know, those same fake accounts that pollute youtube with their nude women photos. A real hell.

But this one was different. It had a profile picture of a Greek statue and a curiously long name. His message was accompanied only by a link, a link that immediately caught the attention of our young man since he could read the term “chronivac”.

There was little hope that it was not a dream, or his imagination, or unreal. But reality dominated his thinking. He opened the link 

“Chronivac, Latest Edition” was displayed in the middle of his screen. There was a drop-down menu with different pages on the website. One of them was called “Targets”. Clicking on it, he came across a world map, similar to Google Map but more sober. The site zoomed in on her house before displaying her name at its exact location. Not just her name. The names of her family members were there. Also those of the neighbors. And even of the inhabitants of the neighborhood!

Hope overcame reason. He wanted to believe it. He believed in one of those stories he could read on Tumblr. He pressed his name, and then— This is what he has always dreamed of. An extremely complete interface displaying all its physical or mental characteristics… There were even different options such as the ability to change reality or even use prompts instead of checking elements for transformations.

It was fantastic. He discovered the different menus and saw the image reader option as what the gpt chat could do. Suddenly, he had an idea. He recorded an image of a sexy guy that he followed on twitter and instagram. He added a prompt «Give me the identical physique of the man in the photo, and ONLY his physique». For the rest, he wanted something different. He did not want to become this man, he only wanted his body to serve as the basis for his new life.

For his mind, he deliberately clicked on the «Stupid jock» option, not wanting to  click on ten thousand different options to forge a new personality. Finally, to better change the reality, he launched a second prompt: "I will become a heterosexual Hispanic sportsman, completely dominated by primitive and conservative thoughts. The chronivac will disappear from my life and I will never have access to it again, no matter what.”

This last part could have been replaced by the possibility of making the transformation permanent, but he did not want it. He liked these cliche stories where the protagonist was forced to stay in this new life, a real victim.

His excitement made him want to get through this. He voluntarily locked himself in there. He fell victim to his fantasies. And he loved it. Not clicking on the permanent option would torture him for the rest of his life, leaving him the hope of one day being able to return, even if the prompt made it impossible.

He wanted to explode with joy. He clicked on one last “Adapt Reality” option before pressing "save".

A flash of light blinded him for a few moments. When his body stabilized, he found himself in a basement with sports equipment. "Felipe" he whispered with a Spanish accent. The little voice in his head had just been replaced, he no longer spoke his original language. An uncontrollable desire led him to live his new life as Felipe.

He now had the body of a god. He was incredibly well carved... neither too big nor fat. He measured 1.80m for 85kg. His beautiful pecs bounced, making him laugh. A long stupid laugh that let his intellect disappear, replaced by knowledge about bodybuilding, women and alcohol.

He had little hairs, apparently this gymbro body liked to shave... except under the armpits. He raised his arm to feel this tuft of black and musky hairs... sweat. Yes, it was normal, Felipe was doing his exercises. His whole body was covered in sweat.

Because of the sweat, his underwear was even tighter against his cock. His new penis was now circumcised, just a religious tradition. This cock had met many women in bed.

He also remembered that two friends had to join him for his bodybuilding session, and after that they were going to watch a football match. A good life well stereotyped for an athlete as stupid as Felipe.

He was now a gymbro like the others.

His mind was trapped inside Felipe, inside him, but he was so happy to have fulfilled his fantasy.

It was a dream, the imagination, the unreal come true.

——————————————————————

Please forgive me for the mistakes, I am not fluent in English!

It was a first story, based on the most common clichés in order to do something a little different.

The next stories will be shorter, it was only for the beginning.

I am open to all requests, do not hesitate to offer me images with the source if possible!

The images of the new Felipe come from this X account: @Mariosalvadr

[fortheloveofarchons]

My opinions on Sunday from Honkai: Star Rail

C.W. Contains spoilers after the 2.2 Honkai: Star Rail Trailblazer Quest + theories and lore

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.

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I kinda agree with his philosophies and thinking... to some extent...

Okay hear me out!!!

We all know by now that Sunday's whole motive is to protect everyone and ensure that they won't have to suffer anymore (like when he states that he wants everyone to have seven rest days). I can empathise with his character so much, as someone who (as ridiculous and cowardly as it sounds) is afraid to face the harsh realities of life. I mean, even if he's set as a villain, he is as gentle and empathetic as his sister Robin, just that they both express it differently.

Seeing the cutscenes of him and Robin from their past to the present was just so immersive, because Sunday brings up some very demoralizing and harsh situations that he faced back then, and we, the audience, can understand and relate to struggling to cope with his disappointment, frustration, grief, and anger - all while often having little to no power to change things.

From the way Sunday is acting, he seems more like a traumatised parental figure (as we've seen the reason why Robin has to wear excessive neck accessories due to her being shot) who cannot let go and provide his care and safe environment for his loved ones.

Moreover, his ideologies felt surreal as I myself would take that path since I can relate to his trauma and ideals (and also as someone who has a sibling too)

His viewpoint is understandable, but...

Taking away the basic right of an individual's free will for safety is always a controversial issue.

As Himeko once called out Sunday, she states that he's just going to trap everyone in a bird cage through eternal slumber, which robs them their freedom and agency.

Plus, from what Robin said, if Sunday's plan worked, he's going to hurt himself too. Because Sunday will be in charge of everything and everyone, he won't even have time to rest, causing his body and mind to be exhausted to the bone (maybe possible cause his mind and body to corrode cause he needs to rest at one point)

Moreover, Firefly made a good point disapproving Sunday's point that he should not assume just because someone is weak doesn't mean that they should automatically escape to fantasy. It is up to you to be strong so you can fly into the sky, and that not everyone who is weak should be weak.

I remember someone commenting on Youtube stating that Sunday protects Robin so much, that Sunday doesn't even know how to protect himself for facing the outside world. It's kind of ironic considering that Sunday is supposed to be the protective, influential type of characters in Penacony, yet he barely knows how to fly. Robin, however, took the opportunity to spread her philosophies of Harmony and influence others in reality.

In conclusion, Sunday has the right idea, it's just that he has a terrible execution. But I know that there are some people who don't mind, I've been on Instagram to see a lot of people agreeing with his views... yes I'm talking about all those sunday stans cause I've seen a lot from them

(I ain't complaining plz we need more Sunday content!!!)

I mean-- in reality I wouldn't agree; but in this story, I would agree with him. (if we don't consider my simping and bias because that has the most influence)

Honestly, I'm hoping he gets a redemption arc because I really love him (I personally wouldn't mind if Sunday gets the Wanderer treatment from Genshin Impact if it means that Sunday will be playable), and hoping that he is really alive (as stated by the leakers that Sunday has a bunch of specific codes and emotion codes that's exclusive to playable characters).

That said, may we Sunday havers have more Sunday content and playable Sunday in the future!!! I'm gonna write a fic for Sunday so stay tuned!!

Let me know what you guys think of Sunday! Do you think he'll get redeemed? Playable? Alive?

PETITION TO MAKE EVERYDAY SUNDAYYY!!!!!!

[svnshowers]

[     han  hyun  him ,  cis  man ,  he & him.   ]     ⸻     have you seen cole harris-kim? yes, the twenty - three year old senior that’s usually wandering around campus? they’re currently focused on history, so we’re sure they’ve been super busy with studying. according to rumors, they were michael’s teammate & best friend and he knew they [ got away with taking performance enhancing drugs ]. does it make sense considering they’re known for being tenacious as well as impulsive? either way, the phantom is threatening to bring scary things to light, but let’s hope whatever they’re hiding stays in the dark.

basics

birth name: cole jacob harris-kim nicknames: n/a date of birth: april 5th 2001 - 23 years old. place of birth: milwaukee, wisconsin residence: los angeles, california occupation: student, youth basketball coach sexual orientation: bisexual relationship status: single big three: aries sun, virgo moon, leo rising mbti type: esfj positive traits: tenacious, energetic, ambitious, sociable, organized, generous, bold. negative traits: impulsive, reckless, insensitive, hot headed, easily influenced, moody, provoking nature. aesthetics: early morning runs, daily workout routines, stacks of books scattered around the room, sneakers squeaking on the gym floor, shirtless instagram pictures, interesting documentaries, studying late into the night, protein shakes. theme song(s): new perspective - panic! at the disco, feel it - d4vd

sparknotes

cole was last born to an accountant father & a nurse mother.

from a young age, sports were heavily encouraged by his parents as both of them had dreams of being professional athletes, but those dreams never panned out.

cole had never wanted to be an athlete, he much preferred reading and studying to playing sports.

he was always interested in history, always reading historical fiction or historical non fiction.

he played basketball on his middle school's team, being one of two students to make it onto varsity his freshman year of high school.

his senior year of high school, he got a full athletic scholarship to golden state. he'd never seen his parents so proud.

away from his parents for the first time, cole began to finally let loose. he got back into immersing himself in history, allowing himself more free time than before.

cole quickly realized he had no idea who he was, he'd spent his whole life for his parents. now he was on his own, struggling to find an identity for himself.

he majored in psychology for a semester before switching, finally, to history. and he fell in love with it.

recently, cole's been more open about his interests. he's more comfortable in his own skin than ever before.

headcanons

cole started taking performance enhancing drugs after his coach told him he was good enough to go pro. he has since stopped because he got close to getting caught.

he is biggest history nerd, he rarely shows it but if you give him the chance he'll talk your ear off about weird historical events.

cole is in his fifth year of college, he switched his major so he lacked the proper credits to graduate in four years.

he coaches ten to twelve year olds in basketball, they all think he's just the coolest dude ever.

cole is a huge animal lover, from the tiniest ant to the biggest whale in the ocean, he loves them all so much.

he hides his nerdiness from people at first, but once he gets more comfortable around someone he'll open up more.

wanted connections

his workout buddy! it can be someone on the basketball team as well, but it's not super important.

other athletes he's close to! it also doesn't have to be someone on the basketball team, i'd love to see him bond with people in other sports!!

another nerd, someone to geek out with him over anything and everything, bonus points if they get him into more nerdy things.

mutual crushes! these two r close friends but refuse to acknowledge their feelings out of fear of ruining the friendship.

an ex friend, it could be someone who judged him for taking performance enhancing drugs, but i am also open to it being for a whole separate reason!

[loquaciousquark]

4-Sided Dive Highlights - Critical Role C3 up to E58 (May. 17, 2023)

Rolling right into the next one, tonight’s guests are Aabria, Christian, Sam, and Travis. We open with Christian wearing sunglasses inside due to one eye being very light sensitive. Travis wins host and hulas his way into a monologue about an increasingly frantic recap of the recent plot, capping off with a ventriloquism segment and a French puppet wolf. It's...not...good, haha.

What the Fuck is Up with That? Sam reveals he verbally bleeps curse words when his kids watch the show, ha. Sam absolutely loves having the guests and mixing up the company. Sam to Aabria: "How do I know you?" Aabria: "What?" It turns out he means how did they meet? Aabria did a D20 game with Matt and Marisha (Pirates of Leviathan). Christian slid into Sam's DMs on Instagram, ahahahaha, and asked him for coffee with Marisha. Incredible! He just felt that Christian had a good heart! Sam, what in the world!

Aww, Christian is still such a fan of the show! (The way he's talking right now is very much like Jeremy Dooley from AH right after he first got hired.) He & Aabria got together for a Session Zero at Matt's place and feel like brother/sister now. They built the characters together. FRIDA came first & Aabria wanted to explore some holes in the world and was able to match elements around FRIDA's build. Plus they didn't know which members of the regular cast they'd be with. As Aabria developed the character Matt instantly decided she'd be paired with Travis. Christian knew FRIDA's color palette before anything else, ha! He knew he wanted to build a complementary character for Sam because he's grateful to the opportunities Sam had given him.

FRIDA has the level of rogue because they'd wandered around for a while on their own, and the cleric levels from Deanna's influence.

Aabria was determined to be a nice generous cleric to counteract any expectations of hard-ass-ness from Laerryn, ha! She picked the Dawnfather because he's one of the most hardline Prime Deities; she's a full cleric with off vibes. She wanted a contrast to FCG, who's in the position of a supplicant; she wanted someone more under the thumb of a deity in order to bring more facets of those relationships. Travis: "A perpetual IOU."

Deanna was one of the names from Chetney's vision; she was fully a Matt invention. Aabria loved the idea of being a past relationship and sent notes to Matt; then the day before they started filming Travis sent more notes to Matt saying she was a fling. "Damn it, I got downgraded to a fling before I even walked in!" Travis had to firm out Chet's backstory as they got to Uthodurn.

Sam really wanted to see Travis kill Santa, but Matt made Oltgar too regretful. Travis loves taking the dark routes in video games when available, but "with Mercer there's so much heart. I feel bad."

They had probably more god advancement in the last seven episodes than the entire campaign. I'm realizing this is about where I am in my show watch, which is why it all feels so current to me! Everyone loved the Changebringer stuff, except Travis could do without the Ring girl hair.

Ludinus was behind it from the start?! What the hell does the leather armor do? He caused the corruption of the Savalirwood 500 years ago, which means he's been planning this for a long time. He tried to kill them with Molaesmyr and corrupted the land, founded the Cerberus Assembly; he's constantly reaching back for the glory of the Age of Arcanum. Everyone hated the freaky animals.

The Rexxentrum Toy Authority was a beautiful moment! Sam: "Why would you come up with a three-letter moniker that was actually standing for something else??"

Sam is very grateful for this arc because it gave a lot of meat to his character. He feels that he's been asking so many questions: who am I, what are dreams, am I alive, who are the gods, I want answers. Now he has a connection with his god, a connection with FRIDA--it doesn't really matter what his original design to kill was for because he has such a bright path forward.

Deanna was built to complement many characters, and Aabria leaned into certain facets for this party over others. "The dying and come back was very built in for Laudna and Ashton and Orym especially" because she spent a lot of her life constantly bringing her husband back from 0 hp. She liked playing with the weird, unresolved feelings of knowing that the dead person isn't gone, just static and waiting. The husband is still alive but is super old???? Ha! "Dustyl" is his name.

Everyone's enjoyed exploring the haunted areas of Exandria. Travis describes several locations on the maps in detail from memory and everyone ribs him a little; it's really cute! Everything was a little wrong in the Savalirwood.

Sam thinks Fearne should have the staff. Fearne having teleportation would be incredible. FCG's coin has a once-a-day power that can cause distractions, ask the Changebringer a question, or get a luck point (which everyone's sure he'll use right away).

The last two interactions with the gods were fascinating because they weren't requests for help, they were demands. Deanna thought she'd died for a second at the end.

Aabria went pure life cleric specifically because she wanted to lean into the drama of resurrection magic being off the table. "Someone's dead? Oh, I'm great at this! Oh...wait..."

Jerry stole the show. Everyone agrees the goats are giant food.

Travis is sad they didn't fight the pterodactyl thing. FRIDA is intentionally built like a tank & has had Death Ward most of the time, so they intentionally drew aggro.

Travis intentionally pulled Chet away from the group when the moon started changing him specifically to avoid endangering the guests, and then Christian went after him! I have spelled "intentionally" wrong as "intentially" every single time. Christian knew it wasn't a "smart" play but thought it would be fun to interact with Chet, and that'll trump optimization every time for him.

The Tower of Inquiry! Favorite encounter so far? Travis: the Ludinus showdown. Sam: Laudna going down and not knowing how to Revivify. (Aabria asked if she could play Otohan and Matt was like, what? No!) Christian: the heist race where Ashton got the bust! Aabria: the same fight as Sam.

How does it feel being part of a larger group? Sam: FCG's entire first group died, so this new group is a lot of pressure. FCG's been one event away from berserkness multiple times. Every time they long rest, Sam can roll a d4 to reduce stress points, but he's self-imposed a rule that he doesn't do so on non-active days.

Sam literally leans over to Travis about his old age rules. Travis has to roll a 100 on the dice (three 0s) in order for Chet to drop dead. He's not concerned at all that it'll happen; Sam is hilariously concerned.

The Deep Dive, sooner than usual! Sam absolutely loved the interaction with the bull. He's delighted "the power of friendship" mattered.

Travis has been sitting on the RTC reveal for a while. He sat down a while back and really mapped out a lot of Chet's backstory and where he traveled, and again pulls out tons of map details like the Wuyun Gorge. The one place he hasn't been yet is Issylra.

FRIDA is a little nervous about turning into a werewolf; being around the group made them more comfortable, but the reveal of killing all those people is concerning. FRIDA also felt they were able to see Chet inside the beast during that fight & loves the idea of being unadulterated & free. Christian texted Matt & asked what it all meant that night, and just got in return, "ahahahahahahahaha". Ha!

Aabria is fascinated that developing these relationships with Bell's Hells has changed the previously friendly ease Deanna had with FRIDA. It's not quite a strain, but it is a reevaluation which is not settled; it's painful. FRIDAY had a strong opinion on the absence of pain and the absence of sadness; he hadn't appreciated how important current relationships were before FCG. Sam: "We have so much in common. We're both metal. We're both murderers."

Sam butchers the FRIDA acronym, which Aabria of course nails. Far-Ranging Integrated Defense Aeormaton. FCG is scared about the Changebringer's lack of clarity, and fears for the future. Travis suggests that if FRIDA dies, FCG should incorporate their body parts. Christian: I'd give you FRIDA's legs.

Everyone laughs at the size differences/similarities in their partners. Dani's (female) SO and she share clothes. Sam shrinks things in the dryer and gives them to Quyen. Alissa is taller than Christian so she can't wear his clothes; same for Aabria and her husband. Travis rolling over in bed is a literal health hazard for Laura, ha!

It took Travis forever to realize Deanna was his Deanna; Aabria even pointed to her name & he didn't get it. When it did click, the panic was real; he had acid reflux and realized she knew the backstory and he didn't! He didn't know if he should be angry or happy or neutral to see her; he had to wait until he had more context clues.

The romance for FCG and FRIDA was organic in nature. Originally they'd thought Deanna & FRIDA might have something, but it didn't pan out. Sam did text Christian to make sure they could lean in after.

Aabria loved getting to play with a character she helped develop in ExU (Fearne).

Tower of Inquiry, Redux: character's favorite board games? Chet: Chutes & Ladders. Deanna: Pandemic. FRIDA: Risk. FCG: Operation.

Post-Break Shenanigans: Super Smash Brothers! Sam: Dark Samus. Travis: Wolf. Aabria: Kirby. Christian: ROB.

Travis thought Oltgar was going to be more of a shit, but he's 100% okay tracking Drixlich instead.

Deanna is concerned after the conversation with the Dawnfather because while it's on brand, she fears losing her powers/life. She'd rather pay it forward first.

Sam wins round one! Huh! Round two: Sam: random (Falco), Travis: Ganondorf, Aabria: Ganondorf, Christian: ROB again.

FCG is weirdly comforted to have direction from the Changebringer; Sam likes her vibe. He was little freaked out by how demanding she was at the end but looks forward to exploring that relationship.

Christian wonders if FRIDA belonged to Ludinus. All he gave Matt was the dream of the child's legs. Time runs out on the second round and Christian takes it by percentage!

Round three: everyone picks random. Sam: Diddy Kong, Travis: Terry, Aabria: Kirby, Christian: Bayonetta.

How does Chet feel about the gods? It's only a matter of time before Chetney takes the gods' place.

FRIDA was very freaked out by fighting Aeormatons, but Chet's gift especially helped a lot.

Deanna feels that while the gods aren't a nascent part of the world, if it weren't them, it'd be someone else. Sam found it hard to play a religious character because his instinct is to be subversive.

Sam asked Matt if FCG had his initials carved on him somewhere after FRIDA revealed theirs. Matt said, "you don't know," then let Sam throw out a handful of suggestions for what the acronym stood for. He didn't know which until the moment, though. The entire conversation was inspired by Christian's play; "Christian did a cool thing and I wanted to steal it."

Christian's best friend Jack was helping him with acronyms; Christian had come up with "FRIDA" and Jack defined it in about thirty seconds, haha. Backronyms!

Travis loved the first Catha transformation. Now he has to decide who to transform into a werewolf. Everyone loves "Bells Heals" as a minigroup name, and "LoveLetters" and "Body Count" for the FRIDA/FCG ship.

Aabria found the two relationships with Deanna/Laerryn very different; with Sam she planned it out, and with Travis she knew she was surprising him. She is fully embracing the "we've already banged" dynamic for all her characters now.

The post-credits scene is a cutout of Sam spinning into the abyss.

That's that! One more 4SD is out right now (came out yesterday), but I'm going to catch up on the show first!

[pomyred]

TRAVELLING AT 80 FROM THE PERSPECTIVE OF A GRUMPY INSOMNIAC

“The world is a book and he who does not travel only reads one page.” (St Augustine, 340 – 370). A philosopher in the Middle Ages whose words capture the imagined joys of travel. For those of us who find such joy fleeting, travel can conjure a vision of hell. I am a delicate flower, whom as the years have crept up my limbs, finds sleep elusive unless I slumber in familiar surroundings. Lumpy beds, hard pillows, the droning hum of 24-hour traffic, the single distant fly buzzing on left out takeaway, the breathing of others whilst I lay awake, ensure that when I come back from a holiday, I look like I need one. Typically, I will catch some vile bug that more robust types shake off and when I look back at what should be happy snaps with friends, I see a pale, puffy face, and a forced grin.

I am puzzled by the fervour to holiday, but I am also a little envious of those who come back smiling with tales of adventures I can no longer manage. Vera and Louise are from my country town and at 80 are still exploring overseas escapades with enthusiasm. This may be a tale told by a grumpy insomniac, but I am willing to suspend my prejudices momentarily in the knowledge that learning of others’ adventures broadens my own.

Though I had trepidations about interviewing these 2 women because my experience of travel at 60 usually causes me to wander around in a dressing gown for 2 weeks on returning home, I consoled myself with positive affirmations such as, not everyone is like me etc. I gave them a few days grace before contacting them about our arrangements. I sensed the deadline looming and was feeling that nervous tension that occurs with uncertainty and of course my premonition was correct, they cancelled. A week passed and an inner panic was building and my untidy dwelling which disobeyed every law of Feng Shui didn’t help but like all amateur writers I ruminated on writing an interview about not getting an interview in the style of Gay Talese. (Talese ,1966).

During those anxious days I sought out research and I came across a blog on Seniors travel by Alison Armstrong. (Armstrong, 2024). At 68 she had rediscovered her joy for skiing despite arthritis and a hip replacement. Stories of people who can do everything as their age advances are a blight, that much like Instagram influencers should be read with a healthy scepticism and of course they never mention the health insurance. Alison’s blog sees her running at the beach in swimwear that denotes a youthful enthusiasm which most 68-year-olds would find a tad far fetched, but of course this is what advertising is all about: possibilities, not negative Nancy's (or Karen’s) whose trips to the beach are restricted to the couch and ads for Home and Away .

Thoughtful dithering led me to ring a Senior’s magazine, and I told the receptionist about my situation, and I was granted a 15-minute interview. This talkative, friendly lady was also a Tour Escort and as a 60-year-old herself was clued up about the Travel Biz. Data on travel at an advanced age is sparse and much of the statistics available register anyone who is over 65 in an inclusive bracket. Unsurprisingly, the primary determinant influencing travel is not age but income. (Lung, 2017). Of course, income denotes comfort and the rich don’t backpack. I think momentarily about travel without limitations and have every worry catered to. For a few moments I’m Audrey Hepburn in Roman Holiday. (Wyler, 1953).

I ask Anna (not her real name).

“Are a lot of people travelling these days after 80?”

“Oh yes” she replies but she does talk about the differing abilities of the aged.

“I had a lovely, lovely lady in her early 70s who had no use of her quad muscles and had to find a ramp everywhere and that made it extremely difficult” but adds “I had a 95-year-old man who was incredibly spritely and got involved in all the activities. It really depends on your own physical fitness.”

She said coach tours and cruise ships were notorious for their contagious abilities.

“You might have someone on a plane that’s sniffing and coughing, and it goes around like crazy.”

I mention briefly that I find it difficult to sleep on holidays.

She answers, “you have to pick your tour.”

My mind wanders briefly into possible internet searches: Tips for travelling as an insomniac. Group travels with insomniacs, Zombie travel guide etc.

Anna continues, “There are unpredictable things that can be dangerous for elderly people and a cobbled street in an unfamiliar environment can cause falls. Foot placement in your 80s is something to consider.” She recalls “I had one lady who stepped off the kerb in NewYork and broke her ankle.”

A passing thought that I wish to express of I couldn’t think of anything worse is overridden by Anna’s breathless monologue and she declares, “a positive mindset is a must” and I’m pleased I didn’t interject.

“One fellow, we were sitting out on the deck one night and we all had cocktails in our hands, and he said to me, Anne I wouldn’t be dead for quids.” Anna emphasises, “it’s the little things that bring joy.”

After interviewing Anna I conclude that travelling at an advanced age is about fitness, luck, and mindset. I am hardly off the phone when I get a message from one of my cancelled ladies saying she would help me out. I feel immediate relief and Gay Talese is relegated to a comforting distance. The following day I get my phone call with the sickly lady (Vera not her real name) from my suburb whose first words are, “you’ll have to put up with me I’m still on Cambodia time.”

I ask, “oh yes how is the jet lag?”

She replies “I feel dreadful, I dare say it’s due to my age. Just worn out basically because of the heat.”

What was the temperature? I ask.

“It was 38 degrees (Celsius) and 98% humidity it was humongous. My head, I wore a hat and my whole body felt like it was burning. I didn’t realise till I got home how burnt I was. After a tour we’d go back to the air-conditioned room and lie on the bed and after half an hour I’d still feel hot.” She replies.

I must say I was a little relieved at her frankness and I find myself placing my hand on my heart in sympathetic hypochondria. Having visited Vietnam in my younger days it was a test which requires some stamina and heat has a habit of sucking the joy from the happiest of travellers.

I ask, “what was the age group you travelled with? Did they make any accomodations for your age?

“Everyone was over 60, I found it rather surprising that the accommodation was Five Star, but I found in the showers there were no rails, nowhere to hang towels it wasn't good for people around our age.” She answers, her voicing lilting slightly with mild irritation.

I ask, “How is your travelling companion doing?”

“We noticed a few days before we got home that a lot of us had sore throats which affected her ear’s because she was already partially deaf, we were just exhausted, and I've got a sore mouth from sunburn.” She replies.

Here I have two differing views on Travel as we age, one from a Seniors Magazine and one from an 83-year-old. I tend to agree with the latter. I’m glad Vera survived, which is a measure of success for an elderly traveller but picking a Holiday which doesn’t involve sweating would be a must for fragile types like me.

You won’t meet me on your next holiday.

[mybookplacenet]

Author Interview: Kat Hausler

Tell us about yourself.: I'm from Virginia but I've lived in Berlin for many years now. Other than writing fiction, I also translate from German. Where did you grow up, and how did this influence your writing?: I grew up in Northern Virginia, which back then felt like all suburbs and chains to me, so I probably had to become weirder to make things interesting. Do you have any unusual writing habits? Leaving messy handwritten notes on scraps of paper all over the place. Although maybe that isn't unusual? Do you have any advice for new authors? It's a long haul. If the first thing you finish is ready to be published, you're a very lucky exception. Sometimes you need to come back to something later to see what's wrong with it. What is the best advice you have ever been given? So many helpful things over the years! One of my old professors used to always warn us not to be glib, and I think that's important at least for my style: that there's a certain emotional depth behind the words. What are you reading now? The Scapegoat by Daphne du Maurier. I love all of her books, and this is a very tense one. What's your biggest weakness? Setting myself up for lots of editing by writing messy first drafts. What is your favorite book of all time? I don't have just one, but Laughter in the Dark is one I've read a few times. When you're not writing, how do you like to spend your time? I like horror movies, board games, wandering around the city, traveling, and of course plenty of coffee and reading. Do you remember the first story you ever read, and the impact it had on you? No but I used to hear the story of Tailypo a lot when I was little and didn't realize how scary it was until much later. Maybe that's why I like horror movies... or why I'm a vegetarian. What has inspired you and your writing style? My own emotional experiences and those people have shared with me, as well as all the books I've enjoyed over the years. Even though I also like some books in complex styles with sentences that go on half a page, over time you notice what works for you in your own writing, which in my case is almost always a close-third perspective that's really in the protagonist's head. What are you working on now? A new novel and several unfinished short stories, but also a lot of promoting my novel What I Know About July that came out recently. What is your favorite method for promoting your work? I try to do a lot of different things because you never know what will reach the right readers. While I don't generally love speaking in front of people, author events can feel more gratifying because your readers are right there in front of you, and you can see that your work means something to them. What's next for you as a writer? I'm doing a reading from What I Know About July in Virginia at Winchester Book Gallery later this month and then in February I'm back in Germany reading at Munich Readery. How well do you work under pressure? It depends what kind of pressure and what kind of work. How do you decide what tone to use with a particular piece of writing? I generally rely on the protagonist's own emotional state and try to make that accessible to readers. If you could share one thing with your fans, what would that be? Authors love posts and reviews by people who connected with their books! Kat Hausler's Author Websites and Profiles Amazon Profile Goodreads Profile BookBub Profile Kat Hausler's Social Media Links Facebook Page Twitter Instagram LinkedIn Read the full article

[unhingedwomandiaries]

Right, so I did something properly mental the other day - I roasted some garlic. I know, absolutely groundbreaking stuff from your resident culinary genius. Thing is, I'm about as much a "garlic girl" as I am a bloody unicorn. Sure, I'll tolerate it in my pasta sauce like a normal person, but I'm not out here writing sonnets about it on Instagram like those insufferable food influencers who'd probably garlic-infuse their own bathwater if it got them enough likes.

Got the idea from some YouTube short because apparently that's where my life decisions come from now. We never did this growing up - Mom was more of a "if it's not from the meat section, we're not eating it" type. But I thought, fuck it, might as well give it a go. Had to make a whole lasagna to justify it though, didn't I? Because apparently just eating garlic bread alone would be too simple. Plus my husband loves lasagna. Me? I'd rather eat x from Account's mystery meat pasties. Speaking of which, saw this video about last meals and some nutjob picked endless lasagna. Mate, if you're about to shuffle off this mortal coil, at least pick something that doesn't taste like disappointment wrapped in pasta sheets.

But here's where it gets proper strange. Few years back, I was interviewing for this job after my ex proved what a massive bellend he was. And who's sitting there but this YouTube bloke I used to watch - you know the type, looks like he's been dragged through a hedge backwards but somehow pulls it off, always had this ginger cat wandering around in his videos.

The moment we locked eyes, I knew he recognized me recognizing him. Got this smirk on his face like he'd just won the normal-person lottery. Kept giving me these looks during the interview too, like the ones my husband gives me when he's thinking about doing unspeakable things to me in the kitchen. (Not while I'm cooking though - we learned that lesson the hard way.)

Didn't get the job, obviously. Apparently being attractive and competent is a disadvantage these days. But Captain Content Creator slipped me his number on a Dr. Pepper cup like we were in some indie rom-com.

We became mates after that. Turned out our grans were in the same knitting circle, because of course they bloody were. Then one day he rings me up sobbing because his girlfriend's been riding the London Eye with some American exchange student, if you catch my drift.

So there I am at his, learning to make fresh pasta like some discount Nigella Lawson. He'd learned it in Florence, probably while that same girlfriend was testing out Italy's local talent. It's all very dramatic - make a flour volcano, crack in some eggs, knead it till your arms feel like they're going to fall off.

Then... well, then everything went to shit. He got murdered at a petrol station, of all the fucking places. Just some random Tuesday night, wrong place, wrong time, wrong end of some psycho's gun. His whole family fell apart after that - mom got cancer, dad went and died skiing (which is possibly the most middle-class way to go), and his brother's just... existing, I suppose.

So yeah, lasagna. Made it from his recipe, spent half my Sunday watching pasta sheets dry like some kind of culinary voyeur. Turned out about as well as you'd expect - mediocre at best, definitely not worth the effort. But isn't that just life? You spend ages trying to recreate something perfect from your past, and it ends up tasting like regret with a side of disappointment.

Oh, and there was this other bloke - proper ghost story, that one. Went thrifting, bought him a camera because apparently that's what passes for romance these days. He mentioned his nan's stuffed shells, so naturally, I offered to recreate them like some demented pasta necromancer. Then he vanished faster than x's dignity at the Christmas party. Twenty quid worth of rennet down the drain and enough pasta to feed a small Italian village sitting in my freezer.

Mom ended up eating it though. Actually said it was "good and soft" which, coming from her, is basically a Michelin star.

So what's the moral here? Fuck knows. Maybe it's "don't try to impress men with pasta" or "don't trust YouTubers with pasta recipes" or just "don't make pasta, full stop." But we'll keep doing it anyway, won't we? Keep trying to make something meaningful out of flour and eggs and memories, even though we know it'll probably end in tears. Or murder. Probably tears though.

[vapehk1]

Where to Buy Elfbar: Your Ultimate Guide to Vaping's Favorite Gadget

Attention all vape enthusiasts and newcomers to the kingdom of puffs! If you’ve been wandering in the misty clouds of confusion about where to buy Elf Bar, fret not. You’ve stumbled upon the ultimate guide that not only points you to where these mystical devices are hidden but does so with a dash of humor. Let’s embark on a whimsical journey to unearth the secrets of acquiring Elf Bars, ensuring your quest is as flavorful as the vapes themselves! The Magical World of Online Shopping Ah, the digital realm—where convenience meets your couch. Shopping online for Elf Bars is like going on a treasure hunt, except the X marks the spot right on your smartphone or computer screen. Major online retailers such as Amazon, eBay, and direct-from-manufacturer sites offer a plethora of options. Whether you're looking for the newest Elf Bar flavors or the best deals, these sites are bustling digital marketplaces where you can compare prices, read reviews, and usually score free shipping. It’s the magic carpet ride of shopping, where you can traverse vast selections without leaving your cozy abode. Now, while shopping online is akin to casting an easy spell, there are a few potions you need to mix correctly. Always check the authenticity of the products—watch out for those sneaky counterfeit Elf Bars that try to mimic the charm of the real ones. Look for sellers with high ratings and glowing reviews. Remember, in the world of online shopping, a well-informed shopper is a powerful wizard!   Venturing into Local Vape Shops For those who prefer a more tactile approach to their vape shopping, local vape shops are akin to taverns where fellow vaping adventurers gather. Walking into a vape shop is like stepping into a potion class; you can smell the flavors, handle the devices, and consult with the shopkeeper, who is often as knowledgeable as any wizard of vape lore. These shops are fantastic for getting a real feel of the product, trying out different flavors, and getting some sage advice from the vaping community. Moreover, supporting local businesses is like helping your own guild thrive—it keeps the community potion bubbling! These shops often offer loyalty programs, discounts, and the invaluable opportunity to ask as many questions as you can without having to cast a "speedy reply" spell on a customer service email. Social Media Marketplaces – The New Frontier Social media isn’t just for sharing memes and spying on your ex; it’s also a bustling marketplace where many vendors sell products like Elf Bars. Platforms like Facebook Marketplace, Instagram, and even specialized vape groups offer a plethora of options. Here, you can find sellers posting their best Elf Bar offerings, complete with all the enchanting flavors one can dream of. However, navigating these platforms requires a bit of cunning. Always ensure the seller has a good reputation and check for any reviews or comments from other buyers. Think of it as checking the credibility of a scroll or a map in a medieval market—it needs to be legit! Also, engaging directly with sellers can sometimes lead to better deals or insights into when the next batch of magical Elf Bars might arrive. Exploring Festivals and Vape Expos Finally, for those who love a good quest, attending vape expos and festivals can be an exhilarating experience. These events are like the grand festivals of yore, where traders from all over the land would gather to showcase their finest wares. Vape expos are filled with manufacturers, enthusiasts, and influencers, all sharing their passion and products. Here, you can sample a wide array of Elf Bars, discover new and upcoming products, and even score some exclusive deals that are not available in the common market. The atmosphere at these events is electrifying—imagine a carnival, but with clouds of vape instead of cotton candy. It's a place to learn, socialize, and immerse yourself in the culture of vaping. Just remember to keep your wits about you as you navigate through the maze of stalls and vendors, each more eager than the last to enchant you with their vaping spells! Conclusion Navigating the enchanting world of Elf Bars doesn't have to be daunting. Whether you're cozying up at home browsing online marketplaces like Amazon or eBay, or you prefer the tactile pleasures of local vape shops where you can chat with knowledgeable shopkeepers, options abound. Social media platforms offer a modern twist on the marketplace, allowing you to connect directly with sellers for personalized deals. For a more immersive experience, vape expos and festivals provide an opportunity to explore a wide variety of products and get exclusive offers while mingling with fellow vaping enthusiasts. This guide offers a humorous and insightful look into all these avenues, ensuring your quest to purchase Elf Bars is both successful and enjoyable. FAQs 1. What are Elf Bars? Elf Bars are a popular brand of disposable vape devices known for their wide range of flavors and user-friendly design. Each bar is pre-filled with e-liquid and comes with a fully charged battery, making them ready to use right out of the package. They're a convenient option for both beginners and seasoned vapers looking for a hassle-free vaping experience. 2. Where can I buy Elf Bars? Elf Bars can be purchased from a variety of locations including online retailers like Amazon and eBay, local vape shops, and through social media marketplaces. For those looking to explore in person or get deals directly from the source, attending vape expos and festivals can also be a great way to purchase these devices. 3. How do I know if an Elf Bar is authentic? To ensure you're buying an authentic Elf Bar, purchase from reputable sellers or authorized retailers. Check the packaging for authenticity codes that can often be verified on the manufacturer’s website. Additionally, reliable sellers typically have good reviews and transparent return policies. 4. Can I recharge an Elf Bar? Elf Bars are designed to be disposable and are not meant to be recharged or refilled. Once the e-liquid runs out or the battery dies, the device should be disposed of properly. For a more sustainable option, consider rechargeable vape devices that allow for e-liquid refills and battery charging. 5. What makes Elf Bars popular among vapers? Elf Bars are favored for their convenience, variety of flavors, and consistent quality. They require no setup or maintenance, which appeals to both beginners and those who wish to vape without the fuss of refilling or charging. The wide array of available flavors ensures that there is something to suit every palate, making them a versatile choice in the vaping community. If you want to know more, please refer to this article: https://keystonevape.com/best-vape/the-best-disposable-vapes-2024-you-cant-miss/ Read the full article

[goetzjpvis]

3/10/24 "Pulse" JPT3391

I have written my PULSE blog post FOUR TIMES ALREADY! Each time, my computer and tumblr has somehow ERASED my writing, although I've been repeatedly saving it as a draft, and instead it just replaces it with my movie notes! I am at my limit. I have written such a good blog post three times for it to get removed each time. I'm going to try once more for the last time, but If the pulse ghosts take me I won't guarantee this'll stay in writing.

----- sorry

Man, this movie was everywhere. I really enjoyed the message that it was attempting to put out, and although I think Pulse (JP) has a better execution than its American counterpart, I still feel like the film was really really lacking in quite a few places. The pacing, clash between realism and horror, as well as the execution of horror elements in the movie were slightly jarring and broke my suspension of disbelief a few times. But what would I be doing on this blog if not talking about the greater societal context of this movie?

Pulse generally feels like a warning about the internet, rather than a critique. I know this movie came out around 2000, which most in the developed world consider the 'dawn of the internet'. This was when the internet was a "place", rather than a formless entity that existed metaphysically and stayed with you always, like twitter, twitch, instagram, and discord for the IPhone that's perpetually in your pocket and an extension of you. A lot of the people who were negatively affected by the pulse ghosts were people who carried average, everyday lives and varied from technologically savvy to absolute newbie. I think that this served as a statement that anybody could really be negatively affected by more literally, internet usage, and more metaphorically, craving attention and love.

Basically, the internet is a new mode of communication. The main character at the beginning of the film was cited as saying "You're looking for a friend?" Which implies that at the time, the greater Japanese public wasn't utilizing or viewing the internet for technological or business purposes, but rather for connection. This makes the pulse ghosts all the more scarier because this implies that either they themselves are husks of their former person, wandering around aimlessly for social approval, or attempting to take advantage of those who are simply seeking friendship. That I think is a really good metaphor for today's social climate, especially when you take a look at scammers, influencers, and generally troublesome online behavior.

----

I hope you enjoyed my crappy blog post! It would have been better if the ghosts of pulse didn't continuously erase my work (lol).

[unfilteredgrounds]

Beauty in Madness

There is something to be said about the period of coming out of a mental breakdown. I'd liken it to weathering a particularly horrible storm-- you're not sure if you're going to make it through the roiling black clouds, pelting rain and hail, and high winds, and almost want to curse nature itself for making things this way, and then, you emerge from your hideyhole, shocked at how serene the landscape has become.

I used to be embarrassed when I broke down. Due to my upbringing, I'm sure, I saw it as a shameful thing, to sink so deep into your own misery that you scared yourself. But that's not very constructive, is it? I had the most wonderful trip with my partner, and though it was unfortunately brought about by how worried he was for me, it ended up (in my opinion) bringing us far closer together than we'd previously been.

I wrote a letter to myself upon my return, where I bared my truest feelings, those of which I've been too ashamed to really talk about.

I present as someone who is so conscious of others' feelings, someone who is kind, but there is calculation in that kindness. I don't actually trust people, in fact I find it nearly impossible to. To the point where I will actively put myself down instead to get reassurance instead of just asking for it from people.

I have no idea how to articulate what I need. Maybe this is because that part of me was hushed so much as a child that it's just gone silent completely, but it's crazy how I'd rather call myself stupid and needy than ask someone to spend some time with me, or shoot me a text more often. It's calculated in an accidental way. I am fully aware that I am making less of myself, however, it keeps me safe, because I'll not be surprised if the person I'm interacting with leaves me. I can't be betrayed if I set myself up for disappointment, and even though that makes so much sense, it's so... sad.

I don't think I've ever fully sat and come to terms with the fact that, by nature, I'm actually a very lonely person. I like being alone, don't get me wrong, but independence and loneliness are two separate, but crossing, paths. I've done so much work to isolate myself from potential threats that I've completely shaved my personality down to an insecure husk, all because I'm terrified of being mocked and shunned again. Independence is all fun and games until it's not your choice. Kinda mind-fucky, right?

And, my womanhood brings a whole other layer onto the mess. I want to be a strong, independent woman that other people look up to, but the idea of what that actually looks like has been so warped in my head that this insecure husk is my girl boss. Keeping everyone at arm's length keeps me on top. And that's not healthy.

Let's make a list.

The parts of me that I've hidden away:

-Hopeless romantic. I love love, I love showing affection.

-Wanderlust. I am an airhead, in the nicest way possible. I like to daydream, I like to play in the rain, I like soft textures and small bells and windchimes and wandering around outside, not doing much else.

-Philosopher. I have so many thoughts about so many things, but have hushed myself up for fear that I sound stupid.

-Advocate. I hate it when others are mistreated, and that needs to start being directed at myself, too.

I don't know whether it's the ever-looming autism diagnosis that is evasive as it is elating? Daunting? But I've realized just how much of a mask I have formed over the years, just how much I've added layers and layers onto myself in the name of protection, while in reality, I've been screaming, locked away inside this horrible trap with no one to help. Just as intended.

Recently, I've been trying to live more fully. Not by journaling (you'll have noticed the absence on that front), or any of the other crap the influencers say works wonders (for the content, maybe, but are you really happy?). I've gone off most of my social media. I do my best not to look at Instagram, or Twitter. I only contact people through text, and I've been vocal about others reaching out to me for once. Maybe it's a bit harsh, but dammit, I think I deserve to hash out a little bit of harshness myself. And yeah, it is a wake-up call. I'm not some fun, shiny thing that can be tucked away in a corner until someone decides they need my specific flavor. You want to be in my life? You have to be in it. And it's been working. My friends have gotten more involved, or at least they're trying to be. And that feels good.

As much as I revolt against the idea, it feels good, asking for things. It's nice, getting to voice my wants and needs, and hope that they're answered (most of the time, they have been). The other day, I got it in my head that I'd take a bath, put on some ambient music (think spa) and just focus on my breathing and how my body felt in the water. Emerging, I felt more relaxed than I think I've felt in years. It's amazing what a little care can do for you.

It's not frivolous, it's not bitchy, and if people think that, who cares??? They're not worth my time. The people that are will show it.

As long as I do my best to be kind, to be responsible, to put out goodness into the world (keep in mind I said "do my best," no absolutes), I think that will come back to me. I know this to be true. And, if I extend the trust to myself to trust in others, the bad times may not be as bad. Or at least, I won't be alone.

[rozinaaa]

"You Must Think Outside the Box, but Only in a Certain Way That Conforms to Art School Standards and Modern Life" - A Reflection on Having Gone to Art School in the Age of Capitalism, Commodification, and Personal Branding

I'll start off by linking an essay which inspired me to create this post: https://www.alexmurrell.co.uk/articles/the-age-of-average , which is actually a depressing read if you think about it, how everything is essentially the same, despite everyone to claiming to be different to one another, yet all doing the same thing as everyone else.

I'll also add a piece that I created in 2021 (ironically as part of a project for my degree, although it might be viewed as 19-year-old me just going on a somewhat hormonal and youthful rampage of just wanting to deviate from the norm, as what most people would do at that age, for essentially the last time before entering my 20's): https://loremipsummarketing.wordpress.com/ where I looked at how websites in this day and age are essentially the same, pointing out the sameness of everything, and how no one dares to think outside the box despite all claiming to do it, but only in a way which is inoffensive and satisfies everyone. This piece was inspired by realising how samey everything was at the cusp of lockdown, as I scrolled through the same old content on Instagram and Pinterest, along with coming across a Twitter thread which introduced me to the concept of "blanding", where companies shun their distinct identities for a stripped down and minimal version, essentially shells of what they once were, in order to fit in with the depressingly efficient stream of attention that is the modern world.

I'll now focus on how this links to my time at art school. Everyone is encouraged to think creatively and try out new things, so that it will further improve their art practice. But what do they do? They whip out the paintbrushes, the canvas, the paints, and the easel, and they begin to paint something in a realistic manner. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but come on, at least think of something else. I actually struggle to whip out the paintbrushes, the canvas, the paints, and the easel in order to begin to paint something in a realistic manner, but then again, that's not a part of my practice, although I would still use those things in order to create something else entirely, like an abstract painting that makes no sense (it doesn't have to make any sense at all, despite them telling you otherwise), or perhaps even a sculpture consisting of those things, with some random meaning slapped behind it, essentially turning it into a bit of a creature of habit, going down the path of least resistance, which I think would make a damn good art piece, even if I do say so myself, because it's ~different~ and unexpected. Sitting down and creating a painting in a realistic manner isn't going to happen from me. Everywhere I've looked, it's what everyone has done. Perhaps it's the lack of space in the shared studio that makes everyone choose to do the thing that doesn't require a lot of space. Maybe, that's what they think art is all about, just painting, and that's about it.

Wander over to the Illustration side, and everyone's busy drawing away on their iPads with their Apple Pencils, and Procreate as their software, focusing on the same old themes, which I don't even know what they focus on. I'm pretty sure alternative technologies exist, but no, they use those overpriced proprietary things (the least creative things of them all) simply because the folks on Instagram use them. So bloomin' what about who uses what? I mean, if it works for them, and they chose to purchase those things on their own accord, without any external influence, then fair enough, but I'll still highly doubt it.

Head on over to the Graphic Design department downstairs, and everyone's using the Macs with Adobe on them. I've used Adobe on a Mac, so I've got room to talk, and to be honest, I'm both done with the shenanigans from both Adobe and Apple, especially since both are ridiculously bureaucratic about things that should be none of their business to begin with, such as which font I decide to use. I find this workflow way too stifling, and for the creative industry (where everyone insists on using the same things without ever thinking about why they use them apart from the fact that everyone else uses them), it's pretty ironic. Everyone using the same tools to create things will only create things that are very similar to one another, and at this point, I'm disappointed, but not surprised.

All the fun in creativity has gone, and everyone is forced to conform in a non-conformist-but-conformist way, but they're oblivious to it all, since they're stuck in a fancy over designed and over engineered echo chamber designed by Apple themselves, and designed in a way that is extremely hard to escape from, unless their brain is literally wired in a different way, but you may as well be running an obscure Linux distro as your preinstalled operating system for your mind. Sure, they might all claim to be different, but they're all doing the same damn thing.

Meanwhile, I'm sat in the corner, doing my own thing, but also feeling frustrated due to a lack of space to be able to do everything that I want to do, let alone having the space to house my multidisciplinary practice, which spans a lot of disciplines.

Apparently, the work I've done doesn't fit the art school criteria, or even the marking criteria. Does art even need a marking criteria? It seems a bit silly. I could tape a banana to the wall, and it wouldn't conform to their stupid bureaucratic standards, yet that's been done. I could paint the world's smallest painting and submit that for my degree show (which is what someone actually did last year), and that still wouldn't be enough. To be honest, I'd understand if that's all the work that I've done, but I've done so much more than that. I've focused specifically on creating overarching sculptures which reflect on the state of technology in this day and age, but they're not overarching enough, according to the tutors with their stupid little crits that make me lose the will to live.

I believe that my work (especially my final major project work) is overarching enough, even though it might not be taller than me. I mean, come on, everyone has a smartphone that's literally just a six-inch slab of addictive misery that sits in their pocket, yet that's about as overarching as overarching can be, even if you go to extreme measures by setting a bunch of limits and parameters in place in order to use the damned thing less often. In this case, size doesn't matter. Then you've got the computers (again, everyone's at art school rocking a Macbook or an iPad, yet I'm here with my clunky laptop, although a few have slowly started to break out from the Apple shaped mold), which everyone spends a considerable amount of time on, where it's used both for work and leisure, sometimes both at the same time. They're only about 13 inches big, and can fit into a regular bag, yet they're still overarching.

My work consists of old computers as the base (or the canvas, if you will), where I chose them purely because of the size, not because they're old, although that could play an important role. I chose big old ugly computers simply because they don't do them anymore, and simply because the size and three dimensionality of them is beyond impactful and overarching according to today's standards. There's nothing that impactful about sticking a bunch of stickers to the back of my laptop than there is covering a vintage mac in them, simply because that vintage mac has a lot more real estate than any laptop (or computer, for that matter) in this day and age will ever have. There's nothing that impactful (or even possible) if I chose to have cables cascading out of modern monitors, since they don't have the inside space that old monitors have. To me, it makes sense to use old things simply because it's impossible and unworthy to do so with their modern counterparts. With this logic, and with what I've just said, my work is beyond impactful. I mean, if people spend most of their time staring at a six inch slab, then I'm sure they'd be able to feel the impact of my work if they decide to look at it for long enough.

In short, I've essentially thought outside of the box (oh man, I hate that phrase so much), but not in the way that they want me to, and in this case, I literally couldn't care less about their stupid little opinions and their stupid little crits that are designed to put me down and put me off from ever doing anything remotely creative ever again. I'll create what I want, and only I'll be able to have the final say in when it's done. Sure, it might look unfinished, but I chose to leave it like that on purpose, to hone in on the point that nothing meaningful can ever get done in an economy where new things are constantly churned out all the time, where you barely get the time to process anything anymore because there's just so much going on, and being able to keep up with anything is like being on a treadmill that's going at a billion miles per hour.

I've essentially done art school in the correct but incorrect way, and I'm completely fine with that. Instead, art school has essentially and indirectly put me off creating art, but I don't want that to stop me since I still want to be able to create things instead of being just another passive consumer.

[olderthannetfic]

This Goncharov debate is only circling back to the two issues your marvelous blog has put into question all year long. (years?)

One, we are facing a new generation of people that have no idea how to use the internet. If people google search for the movie, and the first result is the Wikipedia page for it, and they settle for that information alone, then obviously they don't know how to look for other sources of information that is not the already digested ones by either social media or Wikipedia. The second is known for being the target of trolls constantly messing with the entries every time some meme is blown out of proportion.

But I don't buy this explanation from some other anons. People are always championing for wokeness but get blinded by their wish of making everything safe because I just google it, and several results mention how all this is a big Tumblr joke. Come on kids, if you can get easily gaslighted by the internet, then this obviously means the people you defend or yourself, maybe need to learn how to navigate this. This has to do with fake news and that stuff, but I thought that only happened to my 68-year-old mum because her only source is Facebook. There are several articles already about how this is “reality internet/unreality/meme”.

Second. Mental illness. I don't mean to victim blame anyone, I suffer from mental illness too, bipolarity, OCD, and clinical depression. I have my bad days. But I am aware of my issues, and that's why I have to be self-aware and not engage with everything that makes me hurt. Once again we need to understand that the only safe space, is the one you create for yourself. The internet is not supposed to be monitored or censured, people can try to control it, but honestly, that would only kill the internet, they already are containing people with algorithms and fake news as it is. To use another meme. “You can't handle the truth”. But others do.

Now, some people are not self-aware of their mental illness, but why do we need to turn it into a responsibility for everyone?. This is the same issue as kids on the internet, I don't have kids, so why should I care about some random kid wandering unsupervised by his parents into the space I have created for myself?. If I had a kid, I certainly would NEVER give them free access to the internet, and when ready, I would teach them at least, how to use it. This is the same issue with people with severe mental illness. It's the responsibility of their families (not their friends either, being in charge of the health of a friend would turn into caregivers burnout).

I might sound extreme, but this is similar to giving a mentally ill person a Gun. People are saying that those kinds of individuals “loss their grip of reality” because of a meme, and in turn, this makes them self harm?, suicidal?....this is the same then as giving them something as dangerous as a weapon. Only people think there's nothing wrong, and it's harmless to have an internet connection.

But if it was, then we wouldn't be speaking about people getting hurt by a joke. But as with guns, those are tools too, it's not problem of the tool, but who is allowed to use one/carry one. People need to stop babying others on the internet, it's no one's duty to make it safe. It took me less than five posts down in my main to see people fighting about Goncharov’s plot differences to make me realize it was a meme.

Do you know what actually needs unreality tags?. Everything and everyone on Tiktok, like put a tag on the App. In fact, I constantly need reality checks every time I enter Instagram and I see an incredible hegemonical beauty on vacation on some paradise island. Influencers should tag themselves as unreality because they induce in me an existential crisis with their dreamlike perfect -from outside capitalist lives. Maybe the real problem is social media….Nah, lets blame the creative artsy game of those dorks instead…right?...

--

[skinnyducky]

class act // v.h.

requested by @lovesicksofi​ 

a/n this was quite difficult to write. i felt like half the time i was info-dumping and i didn’t want anything to feel redundant or like it was slowing the pace down. however, i tried my best and i think it’s good. i hope this what you were expecting and wanting !

vinnie hacker x plus sized!actress!reader

Word Count: 1544, edited

WARNING: fluff, mentions of death (not real) blood (fake) and stabbing (fake), language, and sadness... i think that’s all.

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You were sitting at the makeup chair in your trailer, watching from the mirror as your makeup artist added blood to the corner of your lips. Today was the last day on set for you as your character in your highly anticipated drama film was meeting their demise. It was bittersweet, but after working for a good three months, you were finally happy to get it over with.

Being an actress was something you dreamed of doing. You went from being the sun in your elementary school’s “food chain” play to starring on Broadway in hits like Mean Girls or Wicked. Now, you were hitting the big screen. Though, when people found out about you, as happy as they were to have another talented actress in the business, they had a lot to say about your weight. You were more curvier, more fuller than most of the women in your field, and you faced a lot of criticism for it. No matter how good your acting was, you were always just the “overweight” girl.

At first, those words hurt, and it made you feel as though you wouldn’t make it in the industry. But then, you realized you had been working your ass off to get to where you are today. You damn sure weren’t about to let some snide remarks get in the way of you achieving your dreams. So, you kept pushing and pushing. Now, you had a leading role in a movie, starring alongside Margot Robbie and Brad Pitt.

“I think I need a little bit more pink in the eye.” You said to Andrew, your makeup artist. He rolled his eyes at you and continued to add blush to your cheeks.

“You’re dying, Y/n, not going to the club.”

You shrugged. “Nothing wrong with wanting to look good before I get stabbed.”

“Har, har…now tilt your head.” Andrew sneered, putting on my mascara. “So, where’s Jen? I miss her rants about contracts and stuff.”

“She’s with another client of hers. Something to do with dropping an album or whatever, I don’t know.”

Andrew snickered, screwing the top onto back onto the mascara. “She’s managing music artists too? Isn’t she quite the manager.”

“Tell me about it. I get lucky if she ever she shows me any attention.” You laughed as you pulled out your phone and started scrolling through Instagram. You went through and liked a bunch of pictures until you stopped on a certain person’s photo. A smile plastered itself onto your face as you admired the shirtless shot of your boyfriend, Vinnie.

“Is that the boyfriend I hear so much about?” Andrew grinned.

“That’s him indeed.” You answered with a smile. “His name’s Vinnie.”

You and Vinnie had been together for a good year. You both met at some sleazy influencer party. With you both clinging to wall, clearly not wanting to be there, you two made small talk. You chatted it up about everything: from favorite colors to Elmo, your conversations were wild. At the end of the night when you were getting ready to leave, he asked you for your number—much to your surprise. With glee, you gave it to him and thus led to a beautiful relationship. Of course, there was hate, people questioning what he was doing with you and mocking you because of your weight. But you weren’t focused on that. You had a gorgeous boyfriend and a blossoming career right in front of you. Jealous fans were the least of your worries.

“He’s a cutie, Y/n. You bagged a baddie.” Andrew joked, spritzing some setting spray on his masterpiece. “So, when can I meet him?”

Just before you could respond, the door to your trailer opened. You turned around and shrieked with excitement as your boyfriend wandered in. “I got lost and met Margot Robbie.” He said, causing you and Andrew to laugh. “Hey, babe.”

Vinnie stepped beside you and planted a kiss to your forehead. “Hey, baby!” You squealed. “This is Andrew, my makeup artist.”

You pointed towards the MUA who merely waved at Vinnie before pulling out his phone. “He’s not really social,” you said. “So, what are you doing here? I thought you were doing a sub-a-thon?”

“Well, I was going to, but I decided to come visit you instead.” He replied, moving to stand behind you. He wrapped his arms around your shoulders and rested his chin on your head. “Aren’t you happy to see me?”

“Of course, I am. I’m always happy to see you.”

He grinned and went to kiss your lips but before he could Andrew stopped him. “Not on my watch, sir. That took an hour and a half, and I really would like to not spend another one redoing it.”

You snickered, turning to Vinnie. “He takes his work seriously.”

“Duly noted.”

You and Vinnie shared a laugh and talked for a minute before you were called to set. After getting dressed in your tattered dress and fishnets, you left your trailer with Vinnie following behind you. Now, you were standing in the middle of a trashed hotel room with Brad Pitt across from you and Margot Robbie standing a few feet away. Vinnie stood with the crew as your director explained the scene thoroughly to you.

“Ginger”—he pointed at you—“is being attacked by Paul”—he pointed to Brad Pitt—“and Susan is banging on the door to help you, but it’s locked. When she opens it, you’re already dead, got it?”

You and the other two nodded before the director rushed to his seat behind the camera and yelled, “Action!”

Once the camera’s started rolling, it was like a shift for you. No longer were you Y/n, you were your character, inside and out. As Brad’s character, Paul—safely—flung you across the room, Vinnie couldn’t help but feel a little pained. He knew you were acting but seeing it, it hurt him a little. Margot’s screams rang throughout the set as she banged against the door. “Don’t hurt her, Paul!” she cried.

Tossing you onto the floor, Brad stood over you menacingly. “You wanna screw me over, bitch!” He shouted, gripping the straps of your dress as he pulled out the fake pocketknife in his back pocket.

“Please don’t do this, I’ll do anything. Please,” You cried, gripping onto Brad’s wrist. “Don’t, Paul…don’t do this!”

Vinnie gulped back a sob as he watched the scene unfold with tears pricking the corners of his eyes. Why am I acting like this? He thought. This isn’t real. But it felt real, all too real. It no longer felt like he was on movie set, no cameras or crew. To him, you weren’t playing a character, you were still Y/n…and you were being hurt. He couldn’t take it; he wanted to intervene and save you…but he couldn’t…and that broke his heart.

Soon enough, the epic moment came, and Brad plunged the “knife” deep into your abdomen. You let out an ear-piercing scream, sending chills down everyone’s body. Your breathing hitched as blood poured from your partly opened lips. And then…your body went limp.

“CUT!”

And with that, you we’re back to Y/n. The director ran over to you and pulled you up off the floor. “That was fucking amazing, oh my god! I’ve never worked with anyone who could convey that much emotion before!”

“Thank you!” You blushed. The rest of your cast and crew members flocked around you, complimenting you on your incredible performance. However, as you looked around, you noticed a specific someone missing from the small crowd. As you humbly accepted everyone’s praise, you said your goodbyes and went to search for you boyfriend around the set. When you didn’t find him, you headed back to your trailer. Before you opened the door, you heard the sound of soft cries. With furrowed brows, you walked into the trailer and there was your boyfriend, crying into a pillow on your couch.

“Vinnie? What’s wrong?” You cooed as you sat next to him and rubbed circles on his back.

He shook his head, keeping quiet. “Vinnie, just tell me. I’m not gonna judge you or anything.” You said.

“All of that…I know it was fake and it was just acting, but it felt so real. Seeing you just…die, it hurt me, y’know? I don’t know if it’s because you’re fucking good at what you do or if it’s just boyfriend instincts but, seeing that and knowing I couldn’t do anything to stop it…it was painful.”

“Oh, Vinnie.” You sighed, wrapping your arms around him. “I’m still here, babe. I’m alive, okay? Nothing actually happened to me.”

He nodded into your chest. “I know, but it was too real. I just had to leave.”

“And I understand. Had I known you were planning on coming, I would’ve warned you ahead of time. I didn’t know seeing me acting out a death scene was going to leave you like this. I’m sorry.”

“Y/n, you have nothing to be sorry for. It’s just me being worried over you.”

You smiled, “Well, you have nothing to be worried about.” You placed a kiss on top of head and started to stroke his hair.

“I’m safe.”

“And a damn good actress.” Vinnie added.

“That too.”