#Nora is now playing Austin

[treluna4]

Snippet Sunday

I was tagged by @filet-o-feelings

Triplet fic: Thanksgiving day family drama

“I’m retiring,” Oscar says, “Once this term is over, I am moving back to Austin.”

This announcement is largely met with surprise and jubilation around the large table. Nora, next to him, thumps Oscar on the back. Bea and Catherine say “congratulations!” in unison, and Pez and Leo clink glasses.

Henry doesn’t respond. He watches June carefully set her fork down next to her plate and exchange a look with Alex, who has already done the same. When the jubilation subsides, one voice cuts through the room.

“Why now?” asks Ellen from the opposite side of the table.

“What do you mean, why now?” Oscar counters, defensive already.

“You’ve never mentioned retirement before now, Oscar. Lord knows retirement isn’t really a thing in our legislative system so, why now.”

“It feels like the right time.”

There is silence around the table. The only sound in the kitchen comes from the white noise machine over the baby monitor in the corner. Oscar and Ellen are staring at each other across the table. No one is eating. Or even breathing. Everyone, it seems, is simply waiting.

“Jealousy doesn’t look good on you Oscar,” Ellen says finally.

“What does that mean?”

“Odd timing, that’s all. What exactly prompted this very sudden career change?”

Oscar shrugs, “Things change.”

“What things?” More silence, “just say it, Oscar. No use keeping us waiting any longer.”

Oscar regards his ex-wife like a seasoned football coach debating the next play.

“I want to spend time with the boys,” he admits, “I want them to know their Abuelito.”

“There’s been plenty of time to see them before now. They are almost six months old, not that you’d even know that. You’ve only seen them, what, twice since they were born?”

“I’ve been working, El. You know that. Some of us still have jobs.”

“Really? I don’t remember congress being in session over the summer. I guess a three month long South American vacation was more important than visiting your family. Not that I’m surprised.”

Ellen takes a careful sip of her wine. Oscar’s hand has balled itself into a fist beside his dinner plate.

“You know I would have been around more, but we talked about this! Henry and Alex had enough help as it was, we didn’t want to overwhelm them.”

“How convenient.”

Oscar leans back in his seat, “This is just like you, El. You’re the one who told me to leave, and now you’re blaming me for leaving. Nothing is ever good enough for you.”

[artzychic27]

I just randomly started thinking of Good Burger, so here’s some incorrect quotes

Louis: I want you to bail on Miraculous Burger. You make your sauce for Louis.

Nathaniel: Who's Louis?

Louis: I'm Louis.

Nathaniel: I'm Nathaniel.

Louis: I'm aware!

Nathaniel: You said you were Louis.

—

Luka: I don't even remember what my dad looks like.

Adrien: I don't remember what my dad looks like either, but at least I get to see him everyday.

—

Chloé: Haven't I seen you somewhere before?

Alya: Ever been to Australia?

Chloé: No.

Alya: Me neither.

—

Nino: I'm a dude! He's a dude! She's a dude! 'Cause we're all dudes!

—

Max: Hey, man, about the contract, why don't we just forget about it? *Rips contract in half*

Nino: You don't wanna be partners?

Max: No, see-

Nino: Is it because I'm black?

—

Louis: From now on your life is Mondo Burger. You can forget about your friends, you can forget about your family... because Louis is now your mother and your father.

Cosette: *whispering to female co-worker* Louis must look awfully strange naked.

—

Denise: Man, I can't believe Louis fired me from Mondo Burger. I mean, he yelled at me, then he insulted me. He made fun of me.

Adrien: Boy, you must really suck.

Denise: See right about now I'd slap you in your head but I'm not sure if your brain would understand the concept of pain.

—

Lacey: Check it, Jean, it's the Mondo Idiot!

Jean: Oh, nice to meet you, Mondo Idiot, I'm Jean.

Louis: Well, Jean, you better watch your butt man!

Jean: Okay. *Tries and ends up spinning around and around* I give up. There's no way a guy can watch his own butt.

—

Nora: Little man, I ordered tomatoes on this Miraculous Burger, and I don't see no tomatoes!

Ismael: Well, hang on... *pulls a couple of tomato slices out of his pocket, and slaps them on Nora’s burger* There! Consider yourself tomatoed!

Nora: You're not like other people are you?

Ismael: Nope.

—

Adrien: And that's Myléne, she's a veterinarian.

Myléne: Vegetarian.

Adrien: That means she doesn't eat fur.

Myléne: I won't wear fur, I don't eat meat.

—

Austin T: Would you like to have dinner tomorrow night?

Jean: I like to have dinner every night.

—

Adrien: I thought that if I took the can, there was a good chance that I'd get caught, but even if I did get the Trilampathol to the proper authorities, Louis would hire some powerful attornies who would dispute any charges brought against him or Mondo Burger by manipulating the legal system and the way France’s court system is congested these days, it would take months to convict him of anything. So I thought I'd take matters into my own hands and dump the Trilampathol into the meat supply, making Mondo Burger a victim of its own foul play.

Luka: You thought all that?

Adrien: Yeah. I'm not stupid.

—

Alya: I could've sworn I've seen you somewhere before.

Adrien: Maybe I'm someone famous like a baseball player or a pretty nurse.

Alya: What? What are you talking about?

Adrien: Okay, I give up. Who am I?

Alya: I don't know who you are or where I've seen you before or why you think you're an attractive nurse.

—

Kim: Look! I'm Grape Nose Boy! Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity

Max: Stop that.

Kim: Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity

Max: Would you stop?

Kim: Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity

Max: *Laughing* That ain't funny!

Kim: Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity Bloobity... Made ya laugh!

—

Customer: Excuse me? Look, I ordered one Miraculous Burger with nothing on it.

Rose: That's what I gave you.

Customer: No! You gave me a bun. Just a bun! Look! There's no meat in here.

Rose: But you said you wanted nothing on it.

Customer: Yes, but I expected a meat patty!

Rose: Look, a meat patty is something. You said "nothing". Marc, is a meat patty something or nothing?

Marc: Uh, something?

Rose: I win!

Customer: That's it! I am reporting your name to the manager!

Rose: The manager already knows my name.

Customer: *while throwing the bun down* And I'll see you in Hell! *Leaves*

Rose: Okay! See you there!

—

Marc: Welcome to Miraculous Burger. Home of the Miraculous Burger. Can I take your order?

Construction Worker: Well, it's about time. Can I get 2 Miraculous Burgers?

Marc: Oh, I'm sorry. I have to go get them. Customers aren't allowed in back.

Construction Worker: *irritated* Just give me 2 Miraculous Burgers!

Marc: Sir, I can't just give you two Miraculous Burgers. You have to pay for 'em!

Construction Worker: Forget it!

—

Louis: Can I give you a lift, Kim?

Kim: Gee, I don't know dude. I weigh about 150.

—

Zoé: You are so hot.

Cosette: Oh, well, I often sweat at work.

[forever-fixating]

WIP Wednesday

Thanks to @priincebutt for the tag! I got more living in a new normal for yall! I've strongarmed my best friend into my little corner of the RWRB fandom, and she has been incredible in helping me with this story. Like, I'm talking plot developments, 12th Century gossip, high romance and DRAMA, yall aren't ready. My muse is vibing to write Paris because it has evolved into two chapters and it will blow the romance from Love on the Menu out of the water. I feel very confident in that fact. Yall ain't ready for it!!! Until then, enjoy this little bit of fluff.

Their sexual escapades hadn’t moved beyond oral sex and anal play. When Henry asked Alex about moving further, not to pressure him but to gauge his interest, Alex blushed and buried his face in Henry’s chest, mumbling, “You’re gonna laugh.”

“I assure you I will not,” Henry said, tugging on Alex’s curls so that he would lift his face. “Please tell me, my darling baby boy?”

“That’s cheating,” Alex whined, tilting his head to kiss Henry only to be stopped by the hand in his hair.

Henry smirked. “Be a good boy and tell me.”

He let go of Alex’s hair and waited. Alex glanced to the side and traced his finger down Henry’s sternum. Goosebumps broke out over Henry’s skin. After a moment, Alex finally said, “I want to wait until we’re in Paris. Like- I get it, it’s cliche, but-”

“Darling,” Henry said, cupping Alex’s jaw to stop his rambling. Brown eyes widened, and Henry smiled. “Remember who you’re talking to. That is beyond romantic. I don’t give a tinker’s fig if it’s cliche.”

“Tinker’s fig?” Alex giggled, his previous bashfulness evaporated.

“What We Do In The Shadows,” Henry offered as explanation. “Matt Berry is a British national treasure.”

“Oh yeah, June and Nora are obsessed with that show. I’ve been meaning to watch it, but I keep forgetting.”

Henry grabbed his remote from the bedside table. “We’re fixing that right now.”

As he queued up the show on his Hulu account, Alex nuzzled closer and whispered, “Thank you, baby.”

Henry traced his fingers down Alex’s spine. “You’re very welcome, my dahling.”

Alex snorted. “Why did you say it like that?”

“You’ll see.”

A/N: Tagging @onthewaytosomewhere @piratefalls @dragonflylady77 and anyone else who wants to play. This chapter is beyond syrupy sweet. I combined New York and Austin so Paris could be in Alex's POV. I'm telling yall, you aren't ready for Paris. One more petite teaser 'cause I just gotta brag on my bestie for writing this little bit of beauty for LIANN. No context, you'll just have to wait and see.

Roses on Our Grave

(Verse 1)

It’s not every day that you wake up in Paris

Hungover from last night’s love

Eyes stinging in the sun, how heavy the air is

With these sweet roses’ perfume

Mmmmm but then

Every day is magic, cuz baby, the magic is you

Surprise me with breakfast and plans for our day

How could I ever refuse?

A walk through the tombstones, and you

Whisper to me

“The lovers are gone, but love stays”

Then stay

(Chorus)

Kiss me in the sunlight

Don’t ever say goodbye

Don’t wait to leave roses at our grave

Hold me close in the night

Soar with me when I fly

I want roses now, not at my grave

A/N- See you soon in Paris!

[littlemisskittentoes]

2023 Writing Roundup

okay chickie wings! first and foremost, a massive thank you to @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @rockyroadkylers and @songliili for tagging me in this game. also pretending that @read-and-write- and @anincompletelist tagged me in this one because they were kind enough to tag me in the Year In Review that i never got around to doing

without further ado...

2023 (kittentoes's version)

January through August

nada. kittentoes was a mere lurker.

September

boxing with no gloves- G, 2.2k

Henry is pushing his arms through the woolen sleeves of a peacoat. He faces Alex and there’s no softness left in his features. He’s genuinely angry this time. None of the endeared exhaustion of his antics Alex is so used to seeing from him. None of the fondness that always plays hide and seek in his eyes when he looks at Alex. Henry looks blank and placid. His press face, edged with a hint of venom. And Alex has seen versions of this face. He’s seen a calmer facade of it, one that had boarded a plane back to England by the time Alex woke up. There’s something cold settling in Alex’s stomach. A kind of panic crawling up his throat. There’s ice dancing at his fingertips, but his hands are sweating, and oh God, Henry’s leaving again. --- Or, Alex and Henry get into a fight. Henry tries to leave, Alex needs him to stay. So he does.

i'd be smart to walk away (but you're quicksand)- M, 3.6k

Henry remembers too, telling himself not to get too close. He remembers knowing intrinsically, unequivocally, that loving Alex would set him on fire. Now, here he is. Burning. Henry is alight and smoldering. And as naturally as Henry knew how combustible Alex would be then, he knows now that he is going to be left as nothing but ash and soot when Alex finally decides to walk away. Still, Henry can’t convince himself to pull the lever on the alarm to set off the sprinklers. He lets himself savor the flames. – or, five times that Henry convinced himself he couldn’t have Alex Claremont-Diaz, and one time he lets Alex convince him he can.

October

i'll love you when the ocean's dry- M, ficlet

“Getting into trouble without me, sweetheart?” “Alex, Alex, you’re going to be so bloody proud of me. Are you listening?” And Alex can hear the flush of Henry’s cheeks, the spark dancing in his eyes. “Pez, hush, Alex has to hear this. Alex, you’re listening, right?” And that wasn’t unusual either. More and more Henry had let Pez convince him to allow himself to loosen up a bit. More and more Henry had started slackening his hold on the carefully crafted veneer he had been trained for years to perfect. Every time, it takes Alex’s breath away. Alex loves every facet of Henry, each mask and every mood. But there’s something about seeing Henry settle into a kind of peace with himself that has Alex feeling like he’s falling in love all over again. He leans even further into the cushioned recliner and lets the drunken lilt of Henry’s voice ease something in his muscles. “I’m listening, baby. Go ahead.” — or, Henry is drunk, and Alex loves him completely.

we should just kiss (like real people do)- T, 2k, Junora

June hasn’t felt like she’s had a home in a long time. There was the house and Texas growing up, of course. But the inevitability of arguments turned silence left the walls feeling more haunted by memories, rather than preserving them. There was the Lake House. But the knowledge it would only ever be a short-lived reprieve made a kind of melancholy brush against the dock with each pass of the waves. There were the dorms of UT Austin, and Evan taking up most of the twin-sized mattress. But thinking too hard about that always made the resentment rear-up, bitter at the back of her throat before she was able to quell it back down. But the picture of Nora sprawled across her carpet, her halo of screens casting pale light along her cheekbones, dancing above her cupid’s bow. Nora’s curls falling into her face with the dip of her head towards the screen, fingertips rushing across the keyboard not daring to stray away long enough to push the strand back. It’s all so achingly familiar that for all June’s skill as a writer, her entire repertoire of connotations and words, she can’t for the life of her think of anything else. -- Or, Henry and June's PR stunt, from June and Nora's perspective.

when you say my name (i like the way it sounds)- G, 3.6k

When he looks back, he gives himself a moment to take it in. He basks in the sound of familiar laughter echoing around their kitchen in the simmering warmth and comfortability that comes with being sucked into Pez’s antics and lulled back by Bea’s steadiness. He revels in the swirl of Nora’s genius and calm of June’s kindness. It’s not quite the same as LA all those years ago. It doesn’t take him by surprise or feel novel anymore. But it's still that feeling of rightness, a crystal clear understanding that this, these people, will always be a kind of home to him. -- or, The Super Six take on a Halloween party. Henry, for once, let’s himself let loose. Drunk, uninhabited, and free to love Alex in public, Henry is happy. Alex stays sober to look after him, and he is so in love he could die.

November

you paint dreamscapes on the wall- E, 5k

“Fuck, H. What are you? A damn vampire?” And Henry loved this too. The way the fire in Alex never quite went out, just smoldered down to embers. He didn’t think he’d ever quite get used to Alex’s wit, his sheer audacity to taunt and pick at him. But Henry was sure he never wanted to, anyway. He loved that that audacity snuck through the cracks of following orders, and waiting in positions. In between the begging, and Alex only ever finishing with permission dripping from Henry’s lips, it was still there. And Christ, if it wasn’t the single-most precious thing Henry had been gifted the honor of experiencing. -- or, Alex is in his own head too much of the time. But Henry can always bring him back.

you call the shots babe (i just wanna be yours)- E, 9.9k

“I wish David were here.” The sigh from his lips rustles one of Alex’s curls loosened away from under the cap. Alex’s eyebrows scrunch together and there’s a new mask edging his features. One Henry can’t quite place in his filmy headspace. “Oh. I thought… Pez said you didn’t have a boyfriend?” The bark of laughter pulled from Henry’s throat is loud and unfettered. The kind of laugh he usually keeps hidden away or stifled behind the guard of a hand against his mouth. “No, no. I mean yes, Pez’s right. But David isn’t–” Another giggle breaks into the words. “David’s a beagle, Alex.” ___ or, Henry gets high, and Alex is everything he's ever wanted.

i know heaven's a thing (i go there when you touch me)- E, 17.2k

He’s never been much of a jealous man. He’s always been far more lured in by the tease of potential than seduced by the idea of possession. Henry isn’t owned by Alex. He chooses to give himself over. And now, watching Henry offer himself not just for Alex, but for Pez as well— Pez, this bright light of energy and unending kindness that has never done anything but protect Henry—well, Alex isn’t sure anything has ever quite knocked the breath out of him the same way the sight of it does. --- or, when Henry acts like a brat, Alex enlists Pez's help to remind him that he doesn't need to in order to get what he wants.

December

many times, many ways- M, 4.8k

The thing is, Alex knows he can’t replace the bittersweet wave of memories that swarm Henry’s head at the sight of snow flurries and smell of peppermint in the air. He doesn’t want to. He wants Henry to keep those close, even if it is through the sepia tone of melancholy. But Alex can’t help but wonder if maybe he can find a way to balance poignancy with something a bit easier. Something a little bit lighter. Something Henry can revisit to understand where he belongs, how he fits into the “happy” of it all any time he needs. He looks over to Henry, finally asleep against his chest. He takes in the gentle slope of Henry’s nose, the fluttered fan of eyelashes against moon-bathed cheeks. He fixates on the subtle canyon, the soft part of Henry’s lips, the phantom wind of a silent snore, and Alex knows: the very least he can do is try. — or, holidays have always come as a reminder to Henry of what he’s lost. But Alex always manages to remind him of everything he’s gained too.

all we know (is touch and go)- G, ficlet

“I had it under control, Alex. You can’t just swoop in anytime you think something might go wrong. You’re not bloody invincible. It’s high time you stopped acting like you are.” “Now where would be the fun in that, sweetheart? Can’t very well get you to play nurse for me if I stick by the sidelines, now can I?” Alex pulls out his best smirk, the one that usually convinces Henry to stop talking to kiss it off of him instead. The glare Henry shoots him makes it clear he’s not getting off that easy tonight. --- or, Alex gets hurt being the hero and Henry just wants him whole.

Coming Soon

PWP Onesot- featuring: somnophilia, Daddy Dom!Alex, so much dirty talk-- coming to an ao3 near you within the next few days

"don't you call him baby"- kensington divergence multichap, featuring: kittentoes's first oc, a lot of angst, alex with a boyfriend that is not henry-- coming to an ao3 near you within the next few months (the current, sole focus wip)

Aftercare Oneshot- featuring: safeword use, healthy communication, domestic!firstprince-- coming to an ao3 near you the next time i need a break from kensington

(Hopefully) Coming Later in 2024

"it always leads to you (in my hometown)"- the 'tis the damn season/childhood best friends to lovers au, featuring: dual timelines, baker!henry, an orion tattoo, and drunk love confessions

smokey smoke verse series- oneshots continuing the relationship established in "you call the shots babe (i just wanna be yours)

more kitten!henry

IM SO SORRY IF YOU'VE ALREADY DONE THIS, MY LIFE IS CHAOS

tagging some friends! @happiness-of-the-pursuit@matherines@inexplicablymine @wordsofhoneydew @firenati0n @read-and-write- @affectionatelyrs @saintlynomenclature @adreamareads @absoluteaudacitywrites @raysletters @daisymae-12 @ssmtskw @hypnostheory

[netflixandchilis]

My thoughts on the Red, White, & Royal Blue movie (as someone who has read the book four times)

I was so excited when I heard that this book was being adapted into a film. As time went on, my anticipation continued to grow. When the casting announcement came out I was elated, and then trepidatious, but I kept my hopes high. I think it is important to remember that, above all else, this film is a rom-com. With that said, my thoughts:

(*Spoilers Ahead*)

1. Alex and Henry

Let's start with the biggest element here, the stars. When I saw the casting announcement my first thought was "wow I can't believe my favorite characters are going to be on-screen". My second was, "aren't they a little old to be playing Alex and Henry". I kept this thought until I watched it and I have to say they make total sense in the context of the film. Aging them up was a great decision in my mind, it made me feel like the characters were at a point in their life where their romance wasn't a fling before growing up, but a conscious decision to have their established lives intertwine. In the book, McQuistion has 400 pages to let us see into the minds of these characters, which doesn't translate well on screen. I also think having a fun queer rom-com for people in their mid-20s is rare.

2. June not being in the film

I missed the "White House Trio" immensely but I think that if June had been in the film she would have been lost. Everything I loved about her wouldn't have made the final cut, I saw this even with Nora and Pez. However, this meant that the found family trope was not included and that was my favorite part of the book.

3. The Richards Campaign

I was disappointed that the Richards campaign and Senator Luna weren't the crux of the third act, I think that made the book so riveting and added a layer of political intrigue to Alex's side. Henry is seen as the one who would face any backlash but the Richards scandal showed that American politics can be just as messy and controlling. The film didn't show this and instead, it is implied that Alex's former hookup leaked the emails. I hated this, but I understand that they couldn't include the original antagonist. I also think this sends the message that a queer person's greatest enemy is their own community or even themselves. At the end of the day, Alex was outed by a jealous ex and Henry was shown that he was the only one preventing himself from living the life he wanted. He didn't have to give the monarchy an ultimatum backed up by his mother and family, he just chose to not listen.

4. Princess Bea

I wish so badly they would have included or even alluded to Bea's substance abuse. Learning that made me sympathize with her character and love how she was there for Henry. In the film, I feel like she is ambivalent about the control the monarchy has. She is very caring of Henry but I feel that not including how her life has been shaped by rigidity made her lack the depth she had in the book.

5. The Karaoke Scene

My favorite scene in the book is the karaoke scene, which was changed in the film. The karaoke scene is the first time we see the prince fully let loose and be himself. It's a scene where Henry allows himself to be flamboyant and unrestricted and that didn't happen in the movie. Instead, it was in a podunk country bar in Texas. I think the scene could have had the same vibe as the book at least. The characters were in Austin, they could have at least gone to a gay bar. I found the lack of silk kimonos devastating.

+1 Things that I wish made it to the film

Ellen's powerpoint

Alex outside the palace before the love confession

Henry talking about having to join the army

The vase!!!!!

Hall & Oates

Henry playing Your Song

Cornetto scene (which I KNOW they filmed)

Prince Henry's sass (+Nora introducing him to Drag Race)

"I'm taking a picture of a national gay landmark... and also a statue"

Henry's philanthropy and refusal to use royal funds

Final thoughts

I have seen the film twice fully through now and I have rewatched some of my favorite clips, overall I love the film. I think I, as well as any hardcore fans of the book, would have loved to see more. I've seen a lot of people say they wish this would have been made into a series, but I think that would never work. Don't get me wrong I would love it and watch it endlessly, but that isn't what this book was about. At the end of the day, the book is about the Prince of England and the First son falling in love, and that is what made it into the movie. Do I think it deserves an Oscar, no, but I also have seen The Proposal over fifty times and I don't think that's a groundbreaking film either. This is a very well-done rom-com that I will rewatch when I want to feel happy and wholesome. And when I want to see political betrayal, silk kimonos, developing friendships, and vulnerable conversations over ice cream, I will reread the book, the same way I have been for the past three years.

[cryingabtab]

im not a super sappy person but i need to be sappy right now.

i am so so happy about how this year went. i made a this tumblr shortly after i saw the elvis movie. i never once thought that when i made this account that i would make so many friends. i am so incredibly grateful for tumblr for bringing all these amazing, beautiful, friends that i’ve made. i love all of you so much and i wholeheartedly hope that you all stay in my life for a long ass time.

i have a confession.

the only reason i saw the elvis movie was because i got ads on hulu and i thought “the actor that plays elvis is fine as fuck”

so i made 2 of my coworkers go see the elvis movie with me in early july.

little did i know, this movie would change my entire life.

i used to be a one direction fangirl, hardcore. i’ve had many other obsessions/hyperfixations in my life but honestly i’ve never had anything as intense as my elvis hyperfixation. he truly changed my entire life for the better.

the people i have met after i realized how amazing elvis was and how amazing austin was as elvis, have also changed my life.

I never thought that i would make so many friends through tumblr and through my “insane” hyperfixation.

however, i am so incredibly grateful for you all. you all make me feel so included and so happy. i can’t remember a time where i’ve been this happy. elvis, austin, and all of you have made me me so insanely happy and at peace in my life.

i would like to thank all of you for being you. i love all of you so much. i am so insanely grateful that i have gotten to know you all.

i genuinely hope that we are forever friends. i love y’all’s energy and personality’s and not to mention that hot girls love elvis and austin 👀👀👀

thank you all so much for making this year worth living.

i love you all so much and i really want y’all to know that 💗💗💗💗

@powerofelvis @flwrs4aust @austinbutler-91 @burninlovebutler @rosaminny @succsessions @elvisfatass @lindszeppelin @loving-elvis @lllsaslll @headfullofpresley @woundmetender @babylovepresley @polksalademma @foreverdolly @ggwritesstuff @karamelcoveredolicity @aconflagrationofmyown @marooosa @samfangirls @oh-austin @eliseinmemphis @star-shard @steph-speaks @bisexualwvtson @blurredcolour @troubleinapinksuit @lovininapinkcadillac @lavenderelvis @luluthesandgoose @nora-nexus-34 @thatbanditqueen

[crowdvscritic]

round up // JUNE 24

This post is late 'cause I'm a writer, Though Austin Butler's cute in The Bikeriders, Who didn’t have time for post creation Before my big summer vacation. And it marks the 12th year Of this little blog now. With a 283rd post, I’ve know I got it down. Too bad anxiety don't do it for ya, John Wayne, he dream came trued it for ya, Bad Boys rebooted up for ya. Now I’m singin' Sabrina all night, oh, Is it that sweet? I guess so. Type it up, down, left, right, oh, Switch it up like Nintendo. Crowd vs. Critic, I know That's that me espresso

June Crowd-Pleasers

1. Bad Boys: Ride or Die (2024)

The fourth Bad Boys is functioning on three levels: 

It reminds us just how fun buddy cop comedies can be.

It’s a soft reboot of the franchise. 

It’s testing the waters for Will Smith’s future.

Read my full review for ZekeFilm. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10

2. “Espresso” by Sabrina Carpenter (2024)

It may be technically too early to call the race for Song of the Summer, but it’s going to take a major earworm to dethrone Sabrina Carpenter’s caffeinated pop hit for me. I’ve started playing it on repeat and daydreaming dance routines while driving—is it that sweet? I guess so.

3. Inside Out 2 (2024)

This sequel works because t’s a logical next step for Riley’s growth, but also because of its precision in identifying the competing emotions of middle school. That’s a lovely subversion of the neat endings in most family entertainment, and like most every Pixar entry, it did make me cry. Read my full review for ZekeFilm. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 8.5/10

4. Anxious People by Fredrik Backman (2019)

The narrator—a cousin of Arrested Development's—informs us this is a story about a bank robbery gone wrong. It’s also a story about realtors, falling in love, rabbits, therapy sessions, bedroom closets, police work, bridges, and strange coincidences. It’s a laugh-out-loud ensemble (with some scenes so non sequitur I could imagine them in the best Adam McKay movies) and a sentimental rom-com (with some scenes reminiscent of Nora Ephron’s tone). 

5. Behind Enemy Lines (2001)

This action movie based on a true story more than lives up to its title. When Owen Wilson’s cocky Navy pilot gets caught, yes, behind enemy lines, he then, yes, has to go through a Top Gun-inspired arc. But neither Wilson nor Gene Hackman are phoning in what could’ve been a paint-by-numbers war film, which makes it both thrilling and poignant. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 7.5/10

MORE JUNE CROWD-PLEASERS // House Rules by Myquillyn Smith (2023) isn’t the restricting guide the title suggests but a collection of 100 decorating inspirations // Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby (2006) and Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (2013) make me miss Adam McKay’s true comedy days, when his political views made his jokes more poignant instead of overwhelming the intent of his script // Poms (2019) is a fun entry in the recent trend of Older Screen Lady Legends Doing It For Themselves subgenre (See also: 80 for Brady) // I.S.S. (2023) is more thoughtful than a junkie space thriller needs to be // In the Land of Saint and Sinners (2023) is a classic Western that just happens to be set in Ireland // Snack Shack (2024) is more crass than I prefer, but what works has American Graffiti vibes

June Critic Picks

1. The Bikeriders (2024)

It’s like Austin Butler overheard Robert Redford say, “Paul Newman and I are the handsomest white men who have ever been on screen,” and he said, “Hold my comb.” Butler knows he’s beautiful, and so does writer/director Jeff Nichols, who based The Bikeriders on a book of photography. Nichols also knows how cool guys in leather jackets look while smoking and riding motorcycles (even if we consciously know all of those things are dangerous clichés) and that it takes someone as gorgeous as Butler to make us believe a skeptical woman like Jodie Comer’s Kathy would sell her soul to have him. It’s one of best films of the year so far, and you can hear more thoughts in my review on KTRS's Carney Show. Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 9.5/10

2. Double Feature - ‘40s Rom-Coms With With Political Twists: Without Reservations (1946) + State of the Union (1948)

In Frank Capra’s State of the Union (Crowd: 7.5/10 // Critic: 8.5/10), Spencer Tracy is considering running for President of the United States with the help of lover Angela Lansbury and to the chagrin of wife Katharine Hepburn. In Mervyn LeRoy’s Without Reservations (8/10 // 8.5/10), famous author Claudette Colbert is road-tripping incognito (much like she did in It Happened One Night) after falling hard for returning soldier John Wayne. In both romances, politics are the force driving apart the couples we’re rooting for, and in Reservations, you also get a perfect rom-com BFF in Don DeFore. 

3. The Cross of Lorraine (1943)

About the same time Casablanca came out, Peter Lorre played a supporting role in another World War II adventure filmed as people were escaping the Nazis in real life. This French POW drama (also co-starring Gene Kelly) walked so that Steve McQueen could jump that motorcycle in The Great Escape. Crowd: 7.5/10 // Critic: 8/10

4. Broadcast News (1987)

What’s a girl to do when she has no time to write a valedictorian speech? And what’s a girl to do when she has to choose between two terrible love interests while working in the world of TV journalism? In ep. 140 of SO IT’S A SHOW?, Kayla and I are digging into the ‘80s romantic dramedy Broadcast News and trying to figure out what the hey it has to do with Rory’s graduation in Gilmore Girls. Why is Lorelai comparing Rory to Holly Hunter? What ethical controversy (if you can even call it that) could make Holly Hunter break up with a dreamy news anchor? And how much do we love The Incredibles? Listen in for a special report on all of these stories.

5. Fancy Dance (2023)

Part mystery, part character drama, all Lily Gladstone star power. Fancy Dance overlaps in plot and theme with Killers of the Flower Moon, but Gladstone has created a completely different character stuck in a world of crime and custody battles. Watch my full review on KMOV. Crowd: 7/10 // Critic: 8.5/10

Also in June…

I reviewed Janet Planet for ZekeFilm, which was the opposite of Snack Shack: On paper it's a film I should've loved, but I didn't care for the execution.

Photo credits: Anxious People. All others IMDb.com.

[everwitch-magiks]

RWRB Fics Roundup

Hey y’all! Once upon a time I had the ambition to post links on here to all the fics and new chapters that I publish on AO3, and I think it’s safe to say that I’ve been an absolute disaster at that over the summer. In my defense I’ve just had so much to write, but that’s not much of a defense seeing as it doesn’t take ages to chuck a link on here. Anyhow. Bottom line is, I’ve severely neglected it, and it’s gotten to a point where I’m just gonna make a post with links to everything I’ve written since June (ish) for you to peruse, so you can see if there’s one that you didn’t catch wind of that catches your eye now. Neat, huh?

So, without further ado, the links! The fics! Let’s go.

Completed works

Love At First Bark General Audiences, AU, tooth-rotting fluff. 3K. “I still don’t know your name, do I?” Henry watches Alex where he’s crouched down in front of David and gently scratching David below his chin. David absolutely loves Alex. Henry can relate. “It’s David,” Henry supplies. “Cool,” Alex says. “And what’s the dog’s name?” Henry blinks at him. “... David?” “What?” Alex exclaims. He looks from David to Henry and then back at David again. “Wow, okay, that is a choice.” Henry wants to sink through the earth and never come back up again.

Shameless Explicit, AU, Henry has a reputation. 14K. Henry has a lot of sex. A lot. He's young and in college and there is no shortage of men to fall in bed with. What better time to explore what he likes and what he fucking loves, as well as to catalogue how to make his many, many partners feel as good as possible? It’s all part of the learning experience. And Henry is a very dedicated student.

Alex has been inescapably aware of Henry ever since that one time they kissed. You don’t just stop being aware of the guy who basically caused your sexuality. So when Henry propositions Alex at a lame frat party, Alex accepts eagerly. Maybe this is exactly what he needs. Maybe, if he can just have Henry once, he’ll have a better chance of finally getting over his embarrassing fixation with Henry. It's worth a try.

When The Time Is Right Part four of my sex club series. Explicit, AU, dom Henry and sub Alex. 16K. “Maybe I could challenge you more,” Henry suggests, his eyes carefully trained on Alex. “And hold you accountable for longer. How does that sound?” “That sounds fucking amazing,” Alex tells him, the words coming out in a rush. “Yes. That. Please.” “Alright, then.” Henry offers him a sly grin. “Alex, love. You just gave me a wonderful idea.” It’s really something, how quickly Alex’s heartbeat picks up. “Oh? Do tell.” Henry’s grin widens. He looks alarmingly pleased with himself. “How would you feel about a staycation?”

When Alex asks Henry for something a little more intense in the bedroom, they end up taking more than just their sex life to the next level.

Out For A Bite Explicit, AU, suspense and supernatural elements. 3K. Henry's eyes fly up, zeroing in on the reflection in the mirror. There, behind him. The man from the bar. He looks different in the fluorescent bathroom lights. Sharper. There’s a look in his eyes that has Henry shivering all over again. It's greedy. Hungry.

He’s staring right at Henry.

Henry's throat feels dry. His heart beats madly. He's heard whispers of this place, and more importantly of its patrons. He thinks he knows what this man is.

ever fallen in love (with someone you shouldn’t have fallen in love with) Explicit, AU, Alex and Henry in DIY Punk & mainstream pop punk, respectively. 34K. Teenage music sensation Kensington have taken the world by storm. With their cool leather jackets and wickedly distorted guitars, they're a pop duo that packs a punch. Or at least they sound like one—their lyrics unfortunately lack any semblance of depth. Alex can't fucking stand Kensington. But thankfully, he doesn’t have to. He’s not likely to cross paths with those British pop losers during his final semester of high school in Texas. And even if he did, he'd never let some stupidly attractive blonde take his focus away from the goal that Alex has worked towards for years: winning the Austin Band Slam with his latino punk trio.

But when Henry comes crashing into Alex's life, with his intriguing piano pieces and piercing blue eyes and slow, purposeful kisses that make Alex burn with want, Alex finds that he might need to reevaluate his stance on both pop losers and distractions. Or maybe not. Maybe he’s better off keeping Henry at arm's length, since it's so painfully evident that Henry will never love him back.

Never Tell Me The Odds Teen and Up Audiences, canon verse, an outside perspective on First Prince as well as a story about a certain Star Wars mural. 2K. "Wait!" Alex yells up to the driver. "Stop! Stop the car!" Up close, it's beautiful. Two stories tall. He can’t imagine how somebody was able to put together something like this so fast.

Ash had never imagined that they'd get the chance to actually meet Alex Claremont-Diaz, and much less get the chance to tell Alex about how that very special Star Wars mural came to be. Although of course, Ash never would have met Alex if it hadn’t been for Farida. Farida and her bold courage, and her warm compassion, and her sometimes infuriating (but always endearing) stubbornness.

yrs. faithfully (with nowhere to go) Explicit, canon verse, a lazy morning in bed leads to something more. 3K. When Alex and Henry wake up together the day before their anniversary, they're genuinely planning on getting out of bed and spending the day as productive members or society. Truly, their intentions are honorable. But a trip down memory lane gets them reminiscing about that night exactly one year ago, when Alex had come running through the rain to deliver some choice words about obtuse fucking assholes.

As Alex and Henry start to relive the memory, they quickly realize that they both remember it intimately. So intimately that they might be able to pull off something of a do-over.

Gadgets and Gizmos A-Plenty A companion piece to dearest Hattie’s soulmate fic. Mature, AU, a look into Henry buying sex toys. Yes. That’s the fic. 2K. There’s a bunch of regulars that Amir knows by name (and, unavoidably, by kinks), but most often Playtime gets one-time visitors. Which makes sense, really. A lot of people don’t seem to want to step into the same adult toy shop twice. So Amir is always a little extra curious when there’s a repeat customer, especially one who is this attractive. And, interestingly, one who’s come back so soon.

The tall, classically handsome man with blond hair and blue eyes left Playtime no less than five hours ago after having purchased a medium-sized, fairly standard vibrator well suited for anal play. And now he’s back. Because apparently, he’s found he needed another vibrator.

If Sex Was A Sport We’d Be Winning Mature, AU, a classic Olympics hookup. 3K. It's remarkable, truly, that Alex didn't even want to be here. He only came all the way to Ariake because June was determined to watch a bunch of prissy ponies strut around to music. Still, perhaps the true Olympic experience lies in the wide variety of disciplines. Or, perhaps, it has something to do with chatting up a pretty blond behind the stables and getting him to show you the inside of an Olympic tack room. As Alex quickly takes to Henry’s sweet smiles and easy confidence, he realizes that just a few stolen moments with this man might turn into his most cherished memory from the Tokyo Olympics.

Alex knows better than to get attached, though. He and Henry live an ocean apart. There’s no way this quick fumble in the stable equivalent of a supply closet could ever lead to anything more. Right?

Talk Dirty To Me Explicit, AU, dom Henry and sub Alex. 9K. Henry studies Nora’s expression for a moment. There’s something about her favourable account of this guy she claims not to want to sleep with again that doesn’t add up. "But you're still not interested in taking him on?"

"He wants more than I'm willing to offer," Nora says frankly. Henry’s always liked this about her—how she doesn’t skirt around the hard facts. It's a part of what makes her so good at dominating. "But you know what? For you, he'd be kind of perfect."

Henry has been active in the local BDSM scene for years and there’s no shortage of men who’d love nothing more than to find themselves at his mercy. But Henry is on a break. He’s not looking for a new partner, but he’s also not expecting to become so intrigued by the man that Nora insists he should meet. Alex is a newcomer on the scene who doesn’t yet know exactly what he wants, much less with who. There’s no way that he could turn out to be exactly who Henry needs. Right?

Date night (please toy with me) Explicit, canon verse, a night out leads to some fun with a toy. 4K. This… this is new. They’ve talked about trying this, about what it’d be like to conceal some of their intimacy in plain sight, about what it would feel like to try and reclaim what is most private to them by flaunting it without anyone even knowing, by daring to take risks again. They’ve agreed that they’d still need to be careful, but they’ve also agreed that it would be interesting. That it would be fun.

And apparently, Henry thinks tonight is the night for it. “Do you trust me, love?”

“Yeah.” Alex swallows. He picks up the box, studying it for a moment. “Do you want… what do you want me to do?”

“I want you to go to the bathroom,” Henry says evenly, “You’ll find everything you need in the box. Then I want you to come back and sit down. Can you do that for me?”

“Yeah. Of course.” Alex taps the box, grinning in Henry’s direction. “I expect we’ll be leaving soon?”

Henry smiles slyly. “If you’re good, yes.”

Ongoing works

Hashtag Soulmates Mature, AU, Henry writes fanfiction. 23K and 7 chapters so far. Alex is perfect and handsome, the golden boy, everybody’s secret crush. So there is absolutely no way that he is the reader who screeches in caps lock every time that Henry posts as much as a drabble. There’s no way. Except Alex just closed his browser fast as fucking lightning, but not before Henry had gotten a good glimpse of the page Alex had open: AO3. ‘Don't Stop Me Now’, Henry’s current wip. The one that Henry literally just updated.

Sweet Jesus. Could it really be?

That... is all! It’s been a productive summer. I’m very excited to continue writing Hashtag Soulmates, and also to start working on a few upcoming First Prince fics that I’m planning on writing. Stay tuned for fics! ♡

[amtrax]

Megaton Girl episode 3 is now available on megatongirl.com and anywhere you download podcasts!

CHECK IT OUT!

Megaton Girl Episode 3 - The Gal in the Big Chair

-Created, Written and Directed by Austin Lee Matthews

Produced by Mark Allen Jr. and Austin Lee Matthews

Amanda Kay (Mystery Skulls Animated) as Connie

Michelle Deco (Fallen Legion) as Laurel

Jason Marnocha (Transformers) as Kirby

PM Seymour (Freedom Planet) as Chuck

Anjali Kunapaneni (The Hayseed Knight) as River

Kdin Jenzen (RWBY) as The Grillmaster

Christopher Smith (Gurren Lagann) as Julian

Alex Weitzman (Genshin Impact) as Moishe

Tiana Camacho (Pokemon) as Nora

Additional voices by Alex Weitzman, Timothy D. Morris, Ryker Matthews and Austin Lee Matthews

Music and Sound Mixing by Austin Lee Matthews

Character designs: Austin Lee Matthews, Ama Schwindenhammer, Jeremy MacKrell

[heymrstargazer]

random and unnecessary facts about my ocs thats basically just a ploy to get everyone to fall in love with them (just ross and colin for now because im lazy)

Colin:

really dislikes the color yellow for no reason in particular

will argue that he hates cuddling all day and sleeps as far away as possible but always ends up half on top of ross anyway

absolutely loves cooking and learning new recipes

(actual detail in the story but) every christmas he gets everyone a book (ross gets one hes already annotated) and he spends for fucking ever picking out the perfect one (austin gets those level 1 childrens books)

hates oil paints with a passion but is committed to learning how to use them (acrylic is his favorite)

(also an actual detail in the story and one i stole from my own plant) has a little succulent named Ben Plantt (like ben platt)

has a love of old record players but they can make him a bit sad just cause he can’t always enjoy them

of course for the most part being deaf doesnt bother him but occasionally it gets to him (aha fuck nora and liam)

has designed every single one of ross’ tattoos 

is surprisingly athletic but doesn’t ever have a reason to use it

is incredibly paranoid about a lot of things but is also really good at hiding it

he has pretty severe ocd. he can get around fine but occasionally it can be hindering. his biggest thing is counting and germs gross him tf out (me? projecting? never.)

has a bad habit of not shutting the fuck up and it always gets him into more trouble than he needs

he has a very intricate mug collection

Ross:

fucks around on the guitar for the most part but when colin has his cochlears off he’ll sing

when colin can hear him he’ll just sing whatever (usually to bother him. example being two trucks)

but in the cases where colin has them off he is the cheesiest fucking sap and does songs like im yours by jason mraz, marry you by bruno mars, and banana pancakes by jack johnson

played baseball all through middle and high school and was actually really fucking good at it but didn’t care enough to take it further

has a very complex theory about the ghosts in the mansion (he doesnt really believe in them but the idea is there (also totally not me projecting again))

he loves doodling but is really reluctant to let anybody see because he watches colin draw masterpieces over and over again and gets pretty shy about it (colin loves them and keeps a few in his wallet like the sap he is)

chews on his nails, sweatshirt strings, earbuds, etc despite how many times hes tried to stop

has really nice handwriting (sorry colin)

literally cant see for shit. his glasses have a really high prescription so they’re basically like little magnifying glasses and he hated them when he was younger (cause ya know they make your eyes and everything look super big) but hes gotten over it by now

thinks its highly entertaining when colin tries putting his glasses on (instant headache ngl) and asks him how they look when ross literally cannot tell at all

really good with tech stuff but complains about having to fix everything (who? me? no definitely not)

just never fucking wears shirts around the bedroom (and later his and colins house)?? whenever he puts one on if its cold or hes about to leave colin always acts surprised because ‘i didnt think you had any’

i could continue but i will stop for now

[thequeenofpixels]

So, I’m playing LoveLink now, and I noticed some characters are the same, I listed some of them that I already confirmed:

Skylar Quinn x Jaden Bower

Sam Knight x Michael Evans

Austin Russo x Damien Jones

William Crome x Julien Alexandre

Daniel Anderson x Ryan Byrne

Min-Jae Lee x Liam Park

Oliver Black x Stefan Silver

Adam Johnson x Dominic Wright

Rafael Becker x Wyatt Moore

Seth Evans x Jamie Grant x Julia Greene

Marco Bottazzi x Hugo Hornsby

Jake  Gonzales x Zayn Kassab

Jonathan Hayes x Albert Bishop

Antoine Dawson x Noah Noah Cruz

Kayla Summers x Jasmin Medina

Clementine Hill x Grace Kim

Milena Sarafian x Ana Samarine

Samantha Clark x Aesha Nora 

Vitoria Voznesensky x Sage Foster

Emmalyn Roberts x Angel Reed

Eve Rockwood x Alice Martin 

I plan to add the others later... but some of them we can’t match yet I suppose... 

_____________________

Edit: I stopped playing LoveLink, the game is too expensive. It was good while it last.

[pawprintsmoon]

Henry has no clue; The Aftermath

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31306808/chapters/77401784

Once Alex leans into the kiss, the prince is royally screwed. An immense energy encompasses them, and he loses his breath along with all his remaining sensibilities. He pulls Alex’s hair, eliciting the sweetest, smallest sound. If he doesn’t stop right now, he won’t be able to stop at all.

“Fuck,” Henry swears, pulling back. Apparently, he still has an ounce of sense after all, or at least an ounce of self-preservation. “I’m just, shit. I’m sorry.”

Snow crunches beneath his stumbling feet as he practically runs away from the freshly snogged boy. The boy who must be having a total identity crisis. Even drunk, he could taste Alex’s confused wanting and a yearning that might even match his own. Impossible. The type of impossible that makes you question your interpretation of reality.

The humid heat and festive noises of the Gala overwhelm him as he re-enters the White House. He is sweating under his wool coat and his collar is too tight around his throat. The champagne in his system is tilting the floor, and it’s too much. Where the fuck is Pez?

Eventually, he finds his best friend between June and Nora, all dancing scandalously close to each other. It’s a testament to Pez’s loyalty that as soon as he looks at Henry, he exits the dancefloor, bowing to the ladies.

“What did you do?” Pez asks, leaning close to talk over the music.

“The most foolish thing possible.” He grabs Pez’s arm. “We have to go.”

After a beat, Pez nods. “Okay, let’s go.”

They walk through the party together, Pez’s presence keeping him from unravelling completely. It’s unlikely that Henry is effectively hiding his emotions, what with the drinking and kissing and panicking. Hopefully everyone around them is too intoxicated to notice.

“So, are we just getting some air or are we calling it a night?” Pez asks as they meet their PPOs at the front door. “Should I call a car to take us to the hotel?”

“No.” He imagines Alex showing up at their hotel the next morning, hungover and demanding answers. “No, we’re going home.”

“Right now?”

“Right now.” Henry’s throat is dry and his eyes are unforgivably wet. “Please.”

Pez stares at him, presumably assessing the severity of the situation, before nodding again.

“Okay, I’ll call a car to take us to the airport,” Pez says, pulling out his phone. “And as soon as we board the plane you are telling me everything.”

Within ten minutes, Shaun arrives with their luggage, a shiny black car, and three burly PPOs. Within two hours they are flying over the Atlantic Ocean, Henry pacing up and down the aisle of their private jet while Pez sips champagne.

"What the hell, Hen?" Pez says at last. Henry had been monologuing his panic spirals since they’d boarded the plane and is finally taking a breath.

"It just kind of happened?" Henry replies. He had fucked up, real bad this time.

"Well, to be completely honest with you, that was too fucking awesome!".

"You mean I did the right thing?" Henry asks, disbelief coloring his face. He isn’t sure if he’s asking approval of his choice to kiss Alex or his choice to run away afterwards.

"I don't know, Hen,” Pez says in an apologetic tone. “All I know about Alexander Claremont-Diaz is that you’re obsessed with him. This was bound to happen eventually, right?"

Henry has no clue how to answer, so he sighs and starts his pacing again. He knows he isn't going to sleep tonight, maybe not ever if he has a say in it. Alex might murder him in his sleep, even if he is protected by PPOs all the bloody time. He makes a mental note to ask Shaan to keep an eye out for Alex and his transatlantic flights.

…

"So yeah that happened." Henry finishes telling last night's events to his therapist who sports an impassive expression.

"Henry, why are you so afraid of Alex's reaction? For all you know he might feel the same way," Shannon says. The sincerity and calm in her voice almost soothes his racing heart.

"Because I do know he feels the same way, but he wasn't ready to know that. His obliviousness was the only thing saving us from falling together; the only thing stopping me from losing control. But then I lost control anyways because he’s just so bloody dense! It’s torture. Hell, both Nora and June have caught on. He’s going to be the last person to figure out he is queer! And I don’t, well, I shouldn’t have pushed it. Rash and careless.” Henry is rambling, but isn’t that the point of therapy? “Sometimes I think I reread Jane Austin too much, because I can’t help pining. Fantasizing. I thought, sure, he’ll see our mutual attraction eventually, and I can wait, and generally, or I can resist making idiotic choices I like to think I’m patient, but-"

He stops speaking abruptly and looks away from her sharp gaze. Even after so many years of therapy, it's still hard for him to talk about his feelings.

"But what Henry?" Shannon gently prods him.

"But I was...I got jealous when I saw them kissing and I just couldn't wait any longer for him to be ready. I know it was not fair, but I’ve known for years now.” He sighs. “I was actually just waiting for Pez to have his fun so we could leave. But...but Alex- he came outside looking for me and he was infuriating and couldn’t take a hint. I just couldn't stop myself. God, I'm such an idiot."

"Henry, we have talked about this before. Not everything is your fault. You need to understand that.” She pauses as if to give him an opportunity to agree with her. When he doesn’t, she continues, “And you told me Alex kissed you back so how can you be sure that he doesn't know that he’s queer?"

"Because I know Alex. I’m his best friend, we’ve talked for hours on end and he’s an obliviously stupid prat and I'm in love with him!" Henry snaps, but Shannon already has an answer ready for that.

"Yes Henry, but it doesn't mean that it was a mistake. You may be in love, but that doesn’t mean you know everything about him and his relationship with his sexuality. You aren’t a mind reader. Maybe he’s just playing dumb, and it’s a farce just like yours. The difference is you appear heterosexual while he appears to be oblivious. You can't know for sure."

That gives Henry something to think about, and he goes quiet for several moments.

Could it be that Alex acting so oblivious was just for the public? But that couldn't be. He knows Alex, knows him, knows him. Not only from the months of constant texting and late-night phone calls but also from countless tabloids and magazines. It didn’t feel like Alex was hiding anything from him. But who knows? Maybe he did it so that he could be himself but still not be himself. Maybe, he could enjoy the queerness but pretend not to know in order to save his political career?

No, that is not the Alexander Gabriel Claremont Diaz, he has come to know. He would be out and proud if he knew. Henry suddenly registers the fact that he is overthinking again when Shannon calls his name.

"Yes, Shannon?" Henry asks politely. Apparently she’d been speaking, but he has no idea what she was saying.

“You can tell me what you’re thinking, you know. That’s literally my job.” She smiles wryly and he grants her a weak laugh. “I was just saying that you can’t possibly try to know what he’s thinking about the kiss, or where he is with his sexuality.”

“Exactly! That’s the other thing.” Henry shakes his head. “Maybe I’ve been wrong this whole time. I thought I knew what he wanted, and that I knew what I wanted, but now I don’t know anything. Maybe Alex is just a very flirty guy. Maybe it’s just an American thing. I haven’t been friends with an American before-”

“Henry”

“- and he was drunk and I kissed him and he probably thinks I took advantage. At the very least, I ran away like a scared twelve-year-old.”

“Let’s try to take a non-judgemental stance here,” suggests Shannon gently. “And for now, let’s just imagine a hypothetical. What if you were right all along, and he really does like you? That’s very much possible, so let’s explore what that would mean, yeah?

Henry shrugs noncommittally.

“You mentioned a couple of weeks ago that you think that if you two get too close you’ll be doomed,” she continues. “Do you still think that?”

“Well, yeah,” replies Henry, looking at his hands. “If he likes me -which I’m not sure he does anymore- then inevitably he’ll get sick of me. I like him so, so much, you know? He might be attracted to me, but he can’t possibly like me the way I like him. And even if by some horrible miracle he does like me back, then what? I’m a bloody prince and he’s an aspiring politician, and there’s no way it wouldn’t end in disaster. The whole world would be looking at us. I’m just… I’m…”

“You’re afraid of getting hurt.”

“I… I guess. Yeah. I feel like I’m about to fall off a cliff, holding onto the unstable rocks, and I have no idea where I’ll land.” Henry chuckled a little at his cliche metaphor. “He must think I’m a complete tosser.”

“Henry,” she gives him that Therapist Look. “You can’t read minds. Journal on that topic this week?”

Henry sighs and nods, letting that sink in. She has said it before, numerous times, and Henry never quite believes her.

They sit in silence before Shannon redirects the conversation.

"When are you meeting Alex again?"

That's an easy question, Henry has known the answer ever since he left D.C. He answers immediately, "Oh never."

"Henry," Shannon reprimands.

"No, you don't get it. I'm going to be murdered if I so much as go within 10 feet near Alex."

"No.” She’s holding back a laugh as she tries to look stern. “The answer is that you're going to the state dinner and you're going to talk to Alex like a mature adult and listen to what he says instead of guessing what he’s thinking. Meanwhile, I want you to think about what we discussed today and tell me next week what you might want to say to him."

"Hour's up then?" Henry asks, because he suddenly can't wait to get out of Shannon’s office. He needs time to think about everything. Or maybe he needs time to avoid thinking about anything.

"We have five more minutes, but if you don't have anything to add today, we can end early." Shannon smiles warmly at him and he knows that if he wishes to continue she wouldn’t mind, but right now he can't. Enough talking of emotions for one eternity, thank you.

So he leaves and as he hurries to the car he texts Shaan: SOS I need about a million boxes of Jaffa Cakes from the nearest corner shop.

Then, sliding into the back seat: Please.

…

The weeks pass by quickly with Henry trying his best to ignore Alex's texts and trying to convince everyone that he oughtn’t to go to the state dinner in D.C. No one listens to him, not Shannon or even Pez. Not even his own sister, rather Bea tries to make him see reason as to why he should go.

It's all 'you never know,’ 'just trust me, Hen' and other bits of vague encouragement. Predictably, Bea decides to drop Henry off at the airport herself so he can't escape at the last minute. When he accuses her of this, however, she’s all 'Can’t a girl escort her dear younger brother to the airport, or what?’

As they leave Kensington palace she explicitly instructs his PPOs that Henry should at all costs stay in America for the allotted time and should not be allowed back even a minute too soon. Shaan, for some reason, seems extremely happy to hear those instructions and can't stop smiling. Henry scowls at him whenever he sees him, thinking that he is Henry's personal equerry. It’s a lot.

"Do I really have to, Bea?" he asks her as they near the airport.

"Henry, you know this is important and by that, I do not mean the state dinner. That can go fuck itself for all I care, but you need to talk to Alex. Hiding from him like this is doing no one any good. Talk to him, see what he says and do not overthink this, Hen please." Bea squeezes his hand lightly as the car stops.

They walk silently side by side to the plane where Bea hugs him and sees him off.

As the plane starts to take off, the panic that had been sedated by her hug starts to grow again, fiercer than ever. Henry keeps repeating the same phrase throughout the flight.

Don't overthink this. It's going to be okay.

[uncloseted]

Skam Kibbe Types: Comparing the Nooras I know a lot of you have seen Skam and its remakes, so I thought it might be fun to compare the Kibbe types of the different actresses who play Noora. Obviously they’re all gorgeous, so the point here is really to show how the same general style is adapted for their different bodies, and how regardless of your body type, if you like a style, you can make it work for you (under the Kibbe system, if Kibbe is your thing). I’ve also talked about their different styles here. OG Noora (Josefine Frida Pettersen): Like I talked about here, I think OG Noora is a soft natural. She’s 5′7, so that narrows our options down a bit. Her shoulders are definitely the broadest part of her body, and her rib cage/torso also has width to it. Her face also has a soft broadness to it. However, she’s missing the sharpness that would indicate a flamboyant natural. So I think soft natural makes sense.   Druck: Mia Winter (Milena Tscharntke): Milena is 5′5 (1.65 m), so she can be pretty much any type. This one is maybe a bit controversial because her face is gaminey, but I think she’s a classic of some sort. I can’t decide if she’s a soft classic or a dramatic classic- what do you guys think? Her waist, hips, and bust are very moderate, but she has some blunted and sharp features. She also looks awesome with straight hair and a blazer, a very classic look:   For comparison, I think she looks a bit too big for the delicate ruffles and patterns in this look:  Skam NL: Liv Reijners (Zoë Love Smith): Zoe is 5′5 and has more softness than some of the other Nooras do. She has more defined curves than some of her counterparts and benefits from flowier, softer looks. I think she’s a theatrical romantic. She looks a bit smaller than she actually is and has delicate features, but she also has a little bit of sharpness throughout her body. We can see that in the body study Zoe did on her instagram:   Skam Austin: Grace Olsen (Kennedy Hermansen): I couldn’t find Kennedy’s height, but she’s taller than Shelby Surdam, who plays Kelsey, so I think she’s around 5′8/5′9. That limits the types she could be to flamboyant natural, soft dramatic, or dramatic. I think she’s a dramatic because she looks lanky and narrow, with a taut bust, tapered, straight waist and hips. She dresses like a soft dramatic (and I think edits her insta photos to look more soft dramatic), but I think she’s better suited to dramatic styles.    Skam France Manon Demissy (Marilyn Lima): I’ve seen a lot of people say that Manon is a gamine, but I’m going to be controversial and push back against that. Her boyfriend (Charles from Skam) is 6'2 and she’s about a head shorter than him, so I think she’s around 5'6-5′7, too tall to be a gamine. I’m going to say that I think she’s a soft classic. To me, she looks like she has some elongation instead of looking super petite (like a gamine would), and she has a moderate but defined bust, waist, and hips.   Now we’re moving into the territory of remakes I haven’t seen, so let me know what you all think. Skam Italia: Eleonora Sava (Benedetta Gargari): Eleonora is 5′7 (170cm), so too tall to be a gamine or romantic type. I’m going to cast another vote for dramatic classic here. To me, she looks like she has some elongation and angularity, but she still has a balanced, defined waist-hips-bust. Plus, she looks totally in her element in classic looks:   WTFock Zoë Loockx (Veerle Dejaeger): This one has been tripping me up for a while. Zoe is 169cm (so again, around 5′7), so too tall to be a gamine or a romantic, and there aren’t a ton of pictures of her online. My guess is that she’s some type of natural, maybe a soft natural like OG Noora. I think she has some width throughout her body, especially in the shoulders, but she also has some softness in her bust and hips:    Skam Espana Nora Grace (Nicole Wallace): To me, Nora looks *tiny*. There’s no way she’s not a soft gamine, and they dress her in very gaminey outfits to compliment that. Alejandro (right) is 6′1, and I would say Nora (middle) is at least 10 inches shorter than he is, putting her around 5′2-5′3.  She looks a bit overwhelmed by the fabric in this picture, where they dress her more like a “traditional” Noora:  And (IMO) looks way better with gamine elements to her outfits, like this:  So that’s it! Let me know if you agree or if you think I’m totally off base. I think this is a really good example of how every type is beautiful and how the same look can be translated to different types.

[inmyarmswrappedin]

Could you give your opinion in al the Noora’s adaptations? I was really interested in what you wrote about Zoe and Manon. My personal favorite is Nora from Spain, Liv from NL could have been a second... but that wedding dress scene is so bad.

Another anon:  Since I’m sure you definitely want to keep talking about the Noora’s, haha, just curious if there is a remake of her that you’d say was your fave?

Third anon:  Ardi, have you ever ranked the nooras? Because I would love to read all your opinions lol

ಠ_ಠ

I can’t say I was expecting this lol, like I thought I’d reflect on the first anon’s ask for a bit, but then I got two more. I find it a bit surprising that people still want to discuss the original characters and their remakes in this the year of the lord 2021. Especially Noora of all characters lol. (Like I said elsewhere, I’m pleased because there are some orig gen topics I want to pick back up this year, so I’m glad people aren’t tired of all this yet.)

I do have to say as a disclaimer that I find Noora’s season very upsetting to watch, so I didn’t bother watching most of their remake seasons. I watched eskam because they got rid of the major issues I had with Noorhelm in s1, such as the pregnancy scare and William coercing Vilde into not using a condom. Then I watched Grace’s season because I wanted to give them views and ensure a renewal. 😭

As a result I’m not going to rank the Nooras, because I feel a bit weird about ranking characters whose seasons I didn’t watch, you feel? I do have opinions on the characters of course, because they show up in other seasons, and I know the gist of what happened in most their seasons because of the typical dashboard watching. I also like... Look, I know the Nooras are very much you either hate or love them, and I generally don’t mind being blunt about the characters I don’t like, but somehow all this Noora discourse made me feel like I was taking shots at a bunch of teen girls (fictional, but still). 

(I had to cut this because it was so much.)

Noora - The thing about Noora is that I was never the intended audience. I’ve never really been into the tropes that make up her love story, like the good girl who says no when she’s actually dying to say yes, the bad boy with the fridged sister, the pregnancy scare, the pathetic friend/jealous shrew who’s only there to make the good girl feel bad, etc. These story elements don’t titillate me or make me interested, they turn me off a story completely. And I just never saw it coming that Noora’s endgame would be the asshole who had stepped so thoroughly over Vilde’s self-esteem. So like... I spent Noora’s whole season (every season after hers, even!) wishing something would happen that made Noora realize she deserved better than William,

Also, one thing about Noora that many of her remakes inherited is that she just doesn’t seem like a regular part of the show. Her friends’ problems don’t affect her in the slightest, she isn’t an actual part of the squad like the others. After her season she takes off for London or the US or to build houses for Habitat for Humanity or whatever, and she only drops by to break up and reconcile with William some more. Like I can’t buy her as a high schooler when after a certain point she’s just like, “I came back from Manhattan and I need a place to stay because Henry is too busy with the stock market to fulfill my needs.” I’m sorry what???? Is this a high school show or Desperate Housewives.

Manon - already talked about her here.

Mia - I’m going to try to be brief because there’s so much to say about her lmao. I feel like the reason Mia is bisexual is because Alex Lindh watched Skam and felt betrayed that Eva and Noora didn’t get together. Making Mia bi was his way to make it make sense that Hanna and Mia would kiss in the end. Unfortunately, I don’t think he put any further thought on how Mia being bi would impact her character.  💔 I don’t think Mia and Alex make any sense as a couple, and I’m not so much surprised they broke up but more like how did they even manage to last that long? Also, I just kinda resent the way Alex Lindh made Alex such an asshole in s1 and the beginning of s2, that it necessitated a looooot more face time to make him likeable to the audience, so that s2 is more the Alex show than for any other William, to the point he gets the panic attack scene instead of Mia. I can’t really say for sure, but it feels like Alex is the most developed Druck LI and for what!!!

Elenonora - Look..... I know I said I don’t think of the Nooras as feminists, but like, Skam itself at least normalizes the idea that feminism is a good thing, you know? And yet, Skam Italia s1 makes such a concerted effort not to have Eleonora say anything too politically charged that I’m just like, okay, we don’t have to go all the way to the other extreme either. (I get the feeling this changes a bit in s3, but imo it was too thoughtlessly implemented.) All that said, the costume and makeup for Eleonora reminds me of Laura Pausini in her first era, so Bessegato has appealed to my 90s nostalgia lol. 

(I can’t be the only one who sees it, right??)

Grace - Grace is one of the few Nooras who does give me the vibe that she’s a full part of the squad. The Austin s2 writers were really good at incorporating the other girls in the squad into her season and involving Grace in the other girls’ problems. I actually really disliked Grace’s season when it started, but unlike a lot of other Skam seasons (and certainly a lot of Noora seasons), it kept getting better every week. I don’t care much for Grace (and Kennedy as a person didn’t help matters), but I do like how big a role the other girls play in her season.

Nora - Sooo I’m biased as fuck, but Nora is the only Noora for me. I think the eskam team did such a good job with the research into the young feminist movement that resulted from the Manada gangrape case. There are just so many Spanish teen girls like Nora, and giving her an older sister who was a SA victim herself was just such a great addition that made Nora even more in tune with the zeitgeist. Now, Nora did tend towards the performative, esp in s4, but I think even that is an accurate portrayal. I don’t think these young feminists are all activists, but they interiorized feminist discourse and applied it to their lives, and while woc were also part of this movement, I’m not sure that in the end they were actually listened to. (And the eskam team failing Amira when they did so right by the other 4, and even Inés and Lara, is certainly indicative of the kind of “feminists” they are.) All in all, I think Nora perfectly reflected 2016-2020 Spanish feminism, and for me she’ll always be a bit of a time capsule of this period, as well as a character I’d be ecstatic were she to become synonymous with Spain in foreign fans’ minds. Flaws in her feminism and all.

Liv - I have to say I don’t have many thoughts about Liv. I feel like, as a character she could’ve been such a game changer, on part with Nora Grace or Ava or Fatou, but the writing just wasn’t there. As in, I don’t think the Skam NL writer was particularly interested in the things Julie Andem did to break Noora out of the playing-hard-to-get mold, which is fair enough since it’s not like I love Noora myself, but then she didn’t substitute it with anything else either. I don’t think it’s on Zoë Love Smith, because the girl has charisma coming out of her pores, and I think she’s the only remake Noora who truly sold Noora’s introduction scene. I just feel like in the end Skam NL was more interested in making music videos than saying anything of substance, unfortunately. 

Zoë - already talked about her here. One thing I have to say about her is that I watched 7 versions of Noora calling William a cliche, but it didn’t hit me until wtfock’s take on the scene that Noora is as much of a cliche as William is. And that’s because Julie Andem’s writing elevated Noora to more than that, so that I didn’t think of Noora as a cliche. But the writing for Zoë never really did. I think that might be one of the reasons why Zoë and Senne are one of the most popular versions of Noorhelm, because they’re very much characters, they’re not really developed in a way that you feel like they could be real people you could know irl.

[lucidpantone]

Random fun question, which 5 skamverse clips do you think you've watched the most?

Ohhhh man this is hard and def wrong but just off the top of my head some of my fav clips def more than 5:

wtfock: OHN and Dinsdag 16:31 All the girl squad walks in..... I just cycle through them based on mood. 

Skamespana: Crisana having their dramatic fight like the boy evaks fight but not like these two. Love em!

The long 12min clip in Amira’s season was fantastic And the pome clip in the high speed chase

Yousef dancing like a dork in front of Sana in OG

Isak walking in to school with hate me now playing

Isak kicking the boys out (kid was a savage)

The hotbaths clip in Italia s4

Respect skamnl clip (GET HIM LIV!!!)

The dress up scene for the club and acting like idiots scene in italia  The skam nl girl fight scene like they threw down them dutchies!!

Skam nl Isa watching liv sing. The grace dance scene is still one of the gem’s of austin. Grace knew how to twerk for white girl too. Zoya pulling up being like bitch try me scene in skam austin.

The flora cash scene in druck s3 the graduation clips in druck Arthur and Noee and the Cello suit clip (Gives me chills its so good)

Arthur and Noee and the gang the pool clip Lola and the first urbex scene when Mayla walks out looking all cute and then jo is all “oh your lola”. The parkour scene druck s5 | Nora running to Josh when she felt again

Druck Visions Of Gideon clip s3 where david leaves the message saying he is “I’m underwater” (fuck this scene murdered me emotionally)

The bonus clip in skam espana that gives us ingrid backstory of what happened and you actually realize how fucking wrong the eva’s are for what they did.  Zoenne in the car by the river Wtfock the failed cyber sex scene because its really well done how robbe pulls back and then sander gets annoyed and adjust immediately.

druck amira & mohammed playfighting  skam nl live playing guitar on top of noah 

Boysquad scenes for skamfr are favs too the hospital one had me in tears with the dinosaur

They are so many more but off the top of my head some of my fav skamverse clips.

[maimishou]

Skam España Season 2 Thoughts and Expectations for Season 3

I finished season two this past Friday and while there were things I enjoyed I don’t really like this season?

Like on the positive side of things I liked Chris’s friendships with Amira and Lucas this season. I think the scenes she has with them were very sweet and were good for her as a character. Likewise, the support the girl squad has for each other also continues to be very good.

More negatively, however, I wasn’t a fan of Joana or Cris’s relationship with her. While there were good romantic scenes and I can understand Joana’s point of view, I didn’t really like her treatment of Cris. I can understand being upset with Cris after that scene on the roof and her not talking to Cris afterwards due to her suicide attempt but I don’t like the way she talked to Cris afterwards. Obviously it’s important to do what’s best for yourself but her treatment of Cris after that reunion wasn’t okay. She basically dismissed Cris’s feelings to play the victim. Likewise, I understand why she did it but I don’t like the things she said to Cris in an attempt to push her away. Obviously they end up together and promise to work on their relationship but I just cannot be invested in them as a couple because from Joana’s words and actions it feels like she doesn’t actually care about Cris.

That said, Cris isn’t perfect. It’s hard to put into words since it’s not a problem I have with Cris herself but outside of her relationships with Amira, Lucas, and the girl group as well as a few scenes with Joana she wasn’t very fun to watch. Like I get that she was struggling with things but  even in other seasons I’ve seen of España, Austin, and NL I still found them fun whereas Cris’s season just feels kind of depressing for reasons I can’t put into words.

Speaking of which, I don’t really like how they handled Cris’s bisexuality. Now I’m not part of the LGBT+ community so I apologize if what I say is harmful but watching the season it didn’t feel like she was struggling with being bi. While she obviously wasn’t invested in Hugo or Ruben there wasn’t really a focus on her relationship with men. Obviously there’s a focus on her coming to terms with her attraction to women but her attraction to men is treated more like an afterthought in that she’s not interested in Ruben or Hugo and while we’re told she likes men this season doesn’t portray that. So for me it feels more like she’s struggling to come to terms with being a lesbian but that’s obviously not the intention if she’s meant to be bi. I don’t know how they could’ve improved without making the season feel even more depressing but as is I don’t like the way her bisexuality was handled this season.

As for next season, I don’t really know much about it? I was corrected on my last post so now I know that this season is the one with the abusive relationship but aside from that the only things I know are that apparently Viri and Hugo are a thing, it apparently ends with Nora being single, and that while Nora is the main point of view Viri acts as a secondary point of view with her own clips. It’s very unlikely but I kind of like the idea of Viri and Nora getting together and while I know it’s not a thing this season I’m kind of hoping that maybe it could be a thing for season four and this season could possibly set that up. I dunno. I still need to watch season three before deciding for sure how I feel about that idea. I’m planning to finish Wednesday since unlike the first two seasons this one has an odd number of episodes so we’ll see how I feel then.