#New start

[socialbutterfly19]

I’m not a size 0 but I’m proud of where I’m at and will continue to work toward my goals

[positiveupwardspiral]

[zarabellasdreams]

[lamigliorepartedime]

ⁱˡ ᶜᵒⁿᵗʳᵃʳⁱᵒ ᵈⁱ "ᵖᵃˢˢᵃᵗᵒ" , ᵖᵉʳ ᵐᵉ ᵒᵍᵍⁱ ,

ⁿᵒⁿ ᵉ' "ᶠᵘᵗᵘʳᵒ", ᵐᵃ "ⁿᵘᵒᵛᵒ" ,

ᵖᵉʳᶜʰᵉ' ˢᵉᵐᵇʳᵃ ᵐᵒˡᵗᵒ ᵖⁱᵘ' ᵛⁱᶜⁱⁿᵒ

ᵈᶠ

𝔹𝕦𝕠𝕟 𝔸𝕟𝕟𝕠 𝕒 𝕥𝕦𝕥𝕥𝕚

[mymotherjerusalem]

"Create in me a clean heart, O God,

And renew a right spirit within me."

Psalm 51:10

[joscribblescomics]

Hello my goobers, if you found my Tumbler page, or if you're new here, welcome, and thank you for trying to find me. You probably realize I don't have much posted here or on other platforms. That's because I've only EVER posted most of my hard work on Tiktok... but now that it's most likely going to get banned, I have no choice but to expand, START ALL OVER!!! and figure out how to work on new platforms just to share my stuff.

I and many other creators are saddened about this news.. to work so hard on something you love so much, putting blood, sweat, tears, time, and effort... for it only to be ripped away... it hurts...

But like an awesome person once told me

"If you can't run... then Walk.. if you can't walk... Then crawl... No matter what YOU Bess keep moving forward!!!"

"If you trip and scrape your knee... have a good cry... but you get back up... And Never stop moving forward."

Thanks, mom.... your awesome... I think lots of people needed to hear that. So yeah, this isn't the end... it's only a new beginning.

[mrs-snape5984]

“I was held in chains but now I’m free…”

“Hey, little train! Wait for me! I once was blind but now I see. Have you left a seat for me? Is that such a stretch of the imagination?” (“O Children” by Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds)

I feel obligated to set up a trigger warning on this post, since I’m mentioning thoughts of suicidal ideation in my text. If you’re feeling uncomfortable with this topic, please feel free to ignore the following four paragraphs and skip right to my praise for the incredibly talented artist of this comic strip.

As already mentioned in some of my latest posts, I’ve commissioned some of my favourite artists here on tumblr for a special project of mine: My afterlife project.

I’m suffering from multiple autoimmune disorders, which probably have paved the way for this bitch of a disease, ME/CFS (myalgic encephalomyelitis/chronic fatigue syndrome), two years ago. Sure, my life already wasn’t the easiest before, but since then, it came to a standstill. More and more, I lost my abilities, my social life, my place in the society…and surely even my participation in my own family. My days are mostly spent in bed all day and night, surrounded only by darkness and solitude.

Patients with severe ME/CFS might die earlier than expected, due to multiple organ failure and - yes, I have to admit, that this reason is, indeed, undeniably relatable (and alluring) to me - suicide. With each passing day, that I’m doomed to “live” with these confines of my personal hell… imprisoned within myself without any chance to escape… death appears to be a welcoming friend, who’s only awaiting to pull me into a tight embrace. For me, it’s like it’s written in the following poem (“Joy in Death”) of Emily Dickinson…it will be good news and maybe even a relief…not just for me.

I know, I can’t leave, yet… and that I have to stay as long as endurable - at least for my children’s sake - but… yeah, BUT… but, damn, I’m tired. My personal limits are set… my lines are drawn… my responsibilities are cleared and both of my closest friends are informed about my pathetic little wishes (please, play that goddamn song for me!). I’m prepared. But for now, I have to stay…. to fight a little longer… to be a mom, even though my kids only see me for a few minutes each day… a mere shadow of the mother, they used to know. It’s a fucking shame!

For this particular part of my afterlife project, I’ve commissioned my sweet friend @sleepybradipo, who will always be my first choice to draw my vision of the young Severus in his own uniquely tender art style, which I’m so weak for.

In my imagination, I will be able to choose, how my eternal life will look like. Finally, I’ll be with Severus! We’ll meet at the age of 11 years and eventually spend the rest of our lives side by side...growing old together. Severus and Jukes will finally get the life, they’ve always deserved to have. I’ve started to show sections of this existence by Severus’ side in some of my other posts, which belong to this project. It may sound strange and pathetic (obviously), but this is all, that I'm wishing for. I want to come home to him.

For this artwork, I asked @sleepybradipo to make the process of “renewing” visible…almost like some kind of resurrection! Jules is stripping off her old, exhausted self, only to be 11 years old again…happily running towards the 11 years old Severus, who’s waiting for her.

Ivano, at first, I felt guilty for my request for this commission. I’m constantly afraid of becoming a burden to others with my ridiculously morbid thoughts and ideas. But you, my dear friend, made me feel seen with your kindness and compassion. Your understanding of my fantasy and the way, you’ve realised it in this mesmerising piece of art, are absolutely breathtaking! I don’t know, how I could possibly show enough gratitude to express, what your art is doing to my black little heart. It’s like a bandage…a soothing balm… a comforting embrace. Thank you for everything, Ivano.

🖤Severus & Julia🖤

🖤Sevy & Jules🖤

PS: I have to apologise for my repetive use of terms in my writing this time. The lack of coherence might be caused by my current “crashing” condition and a weird cocktail of different medications. I’ll try better next time, but it was important for me, to show this heart-wrenching composition of art as soon as possible. Your work needs to be seen, Ivano!

[blipbliss12]

Lake Doxa, Feneos, Greece.

[running-with-cj]

[serenityquest]

[socialbutterfly19]

Every day you start with a blank page… make your story the best and make your journey the best!! You only get one shot at life..live it to the fullest!!!

[perfectlygloriousbread]

Time to build this feed brick by brick… again

[zarabellasdreams]

[conjcosby]

Stardate: 2024.9.23 ▫ A new week, a new start, a new way to remember. 😊🙏 #Growth #Tree #Sky #Sunset #Autumn #Flower #Outdoors #Nature #Photography #NaturePhotography #PicOfTheDay #POTD #NewWeek #NewStart #NewWay

[mymotherjerusalem]

“Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert."

Isaiah 43:18-19