#Netflix da fuck

[brokenangelwings22]

Seriously Netflix? 5 episodes? That’s unfair. How can I judge something that brief?

[shut-up-danny-kun]

Lal jumping Riker right after learning about dating is equivalent to booting up a game and immediately starting with the final boss

[paint-n-thinner]

kimcartoon just fucking died, fuck, where am i going to watch cartoons now 😭

[ultraviolencced]

i think women who kill their abusive husbands should be given an award instead of prison actually

[higheverweave]

LMFAOooooOooooooOooooOoooOOOo

Anyone wanna play "Who's Brave Enough to Poke Meredith?"

[nativegirltapes]

trailerpark!mom!reader was just trying to go out to her favorite local bar when she met drew ........

warnings: i don’t think obx is actually filmed in outer banks but for this fic yes it is. this is basically just lots of dialogue but i’m just trying to fill in tp!mom!reader and drew’s lore. drew being tipsy + corniness & cliches

"we are getting fucked up tonight." your bestfriend shouted. it was thursday, which meant it was 'going out' night. your baby was safe with your sister, and you were in the passenger seat of your bestfriend's 2009 honda civic adjusting final touches to your makeup in the passenger seat mirror. "i fucking hope so. jason has been blowing up my phone all week, threatening to come steal baby." you applied another layer of lipgloss.

"are you fucking serious?" aubrey questioned, looking at you with loving eyes. even though you brought the topic up so casually, she knew it hurt you. "i love you." she branched her arms out over the car console, you accepted her embrace. "now let's get fucked up!" she gave you a kiss on your head. no one had ever made you feel as loved as she did.

ᡣ𐭩˙⋆.˚

"sorry ladies," your usual bouncer stopped you and aubrey, "bars closed tonight. some cast rented it out."

"what?" you realized he wasn't joking. "what cast?" you furrowed your brows, wondering who the fuck would rent out a bar in the middle of nowhere, north carolina. "don't know, some show that's filmed here though."

"you can't just let us in?" you bestfriend proposed. "we know we're you're favorite. cmonnnn." the bouncer giggled, you guys definitely were his favorite, but unfortunately he wouldn't budge. "i wish there was something i could do. sorry girls."

"it's okay." you sighed, grabbing aubrey by her arm and dragging her to the side. she was one to cause a scene and you weren't in the mood to deal with that right now. "this is bullshit." she groaned. "i bet they're rich. rich people always ruining some shit for normal people like us." she circled around you. "can't even enjoy our thursday night anymore."

"it's okay, we can go somewhere else."

"you wanna get in?" an unfamiliar voice interrupted, before you could yank aubrey back to the car. both of you jolting your heads towards the voice. it was a tall pale man, a lit cigarette hung from his lips.

"yeah, can you get us in?" aubrey took no time taking up the offer, interrupting the prolonged eye contact you were sharing with this guy; he was cute and that was hard to find around here. "this way." he tossed his unfinished cigarette in the floor and stomped on it.

"thank you." you said as he held the door for you. as soon as you entered the bar you realized that maybe you really didn't belong there. thursday's usually had a solid crowd, and a familiar one at that. but there wasn't one familiar face aside from yours or your bestfriend's. "shit." you mumbled under your breath, the guy who let you in now long gone, entertaining a group of who you assumed were his friends.

finding a seat at the bar with aubrey, you asked the bartender what the deal was, "so, what's going on?" he poured you your usual. "some netflix cast rented out the bar for the night. outer banks or something?"

“oh, i’ve heard that show.” you replied, trying your best to discreetly look around, seeing if you seen any famous faces from tv, although you didn’t watch much tv. “i didn’t think they actually filmed that here?”

“me neither,” the bartender agreed, before leaving you and aubrey to tend to another person.

you watched as people danced, they all seemed well bonded, almost like family. you giggled at them, hoping one day you’d find a bond like that. you spotted the guy who had let you in, he danced pretty okay for a white guy. “should we dance?” you turned back to aubrey, practically shouting over the loud music.

“why are you even asking?” aubrey laughed, you knew her better than to ask if she wanted to dance, she was always down to dance.

you both danced together as ‘yeah!’ by usher played over the speakers, before you both had roaming hands all over you. you felt big hands wrap around lower stomach, “was hoping i’d come across you again.” a somewhat familiar voice whispered in your ear. you kept your back and ass to him, but turned your head to see his face, selfishly hoping it was the man who’d let you in, relief washed over you when you realized it was. “i was thinking the same thing.” you flirted.

“oh yeah?” he whispered in your ear again. the way he had lean down to reach your ear had your stomach doing flips. “why’s that?” you noticed his breath smelled of liquor and mint.

“i wanted to thank you again.” you answered, pushing your ass even closer to his crotch. flirting with men at the bar definitely was not foreign to you. “you don’t have to thank me. anyone would have let a pretty girl like you in.” he spun you around so you were facing him. “there’s that face.” he smiled, his bloodshot and droopy eyes staring down at you like you were the only girl to ever exist. this felt too intimate for your liking.

“so, why’re you here?” you grabbed his hands from your waist, just holding them with your own, you both still feeling the rhythm of the music playing. “you’re famous or something?”

“something like that i guess.” he shrugged, like he didn’t really want to talk about it. “why are you here?”

“i live here.” you said confused, wondering if he has expected a different answer. “i don’t want to sound like a creep, but you’re like, insanely beautiful.” his lips grazed your ear as he whispered to you. you weren’t sure if it was the alcohol talking or if he actually meant it, but nonetheless you were flattered. a sexy— famous guy saying you were insanely beautiful?

“thank you.” you blushed, pulling your jean skirt down. usually you were good at playing a man’s game but this time felt different. this time felt like something could actually come from this and you hated it.

after some more ramble jamble on the dance floor, the mysterious man asked if you wanted to go outside. “wanna step outside for a minute with me?” he extended his hand, you accepted.

you watched as he lit a cigarette. it seemed like every ounce of outgoingness left your body, you loved talking to and entertaining men, but he just made you flat out nervous. “so you’re from around here?” he offered you a swig of his cig, you declined.

“yeah, just down the street. me and my bestfriend come here every thursday.” you watched his lips as he took a swig, the way his eyebrows furrowed from the smoke was hot. you hated people who smoked but there you were getting turned on over it.

“sorry about that again. i seen the whole fiasco with the bouncer.” he looked down at you. “i mean it’s not your fault.” you reassured him.

“sorry i never asked. what’s your name?” his voice seemed so much deeper and clear now that you two were outside, almost like he was fully sober. it made you question how drunk he actually was, and how much of what you told you he actually meant. “y/n!”

“i’m drew.” he held his hand out, you shook it. his hands was so much bigger than yours. matter of fact, everything about him was so much bigger than you.

before you could question drew and his ‘famousness’ any further you heard his group yelling his name. they were all getting into a limo. how famous were these people? they needed a limo? but you couldn’t recognize literally any of their faces? “i guess that’s me.” drew again, flicked his unfinished cigarette on the ground and stomped it out. “what’s your number y/n?” he pulled out his phone and pulled up the keypad.

you swiftly put in your number and called yourself. you never gave your phone number away to the men you entertained, it was your own personal rule you set for yourself. but something about this one was different and you just couldn’t say no. “i’ll see you around y/n.”

[ataldaprotagonista]

QUAL MÚSICA DA LDR O ELENCO DE LSDLN SERIA?

Nunca fiz algo assim antes então bora.... ta gigantinho. JÁ AVISO QUE O DO ENZO e FER SÃO MEIO ANGST. OUTRA COISA... já comecei a postar a fic do Wagner Moura no app laranja!!!

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ESTEBAN KUKURIZCA - Sweet

Do you want children? Do you wanna marry me? Do you wanna run marathons in Long Beach by the sea? I've got things to do like nothing at all, I wanna do them with you Do you wanna do them with me?

Ele é muito todas do Did you know, né? Sweet, Margaret, Let the light in. O FINAL DESSA TA MUITO ENGRAÇADO KKKKKKKKKK, mas vamos lá:

Vocês ficavam a um tempão, num esqueminha secreto que o elenco da peça que vocês estavam não fazia idéia. Foram meses de processo e meses em que vocês agiam como casal no off... cara, ele dormia na sua casa! Você tinha um kit básico na casa dos pais dele e além disso, tinham roupinhas combinando.

Depois de escutar as músicas da sua diva (Lana Del Rey) ficou PUTA com Kuku.

Por quê ele não te assumia?

Tinha vergonha de você? Achava que era algo passageiro? Porra! Você estava apaixonada e só pensava em se casar, ter filhos, construir a vida de vocês juntos mas depois de tanto tempo já não tinha certeza se era o certo.

Numa noite fria de inverno, regada a vinho, esperava por Esteban (que tinha ido ao mercado) sentada no sofá. Todos os momentos passando pela sua cabeça... se isso não iria pra frente, iria ser cortado de uma vez por todas.

Ele chegou,

-AMOOOOOOOR? BEBITA? - ouviu o barulho das sacolas de plástico sendo despejadas no mármore da pia na cozinha - COMPREI UMAS COISI - ele te viu toda bravinha no sofá - nhas pro jantar. O quê foi?

Você engoliu em seco quando ele se ajoelhou a sua frente.

-Fala logo! Ta me assustando.

-O quê a gente tem?

-Quê?

-O quê a gente tem, Esteban? Você mora comigo, dividimos as contas, temos dois gatos, sua mãe me ama... mas ao mesmo tempo... não sei se quer filhos, se quer se casar, se pensa na gente velinho como eu penso. Eu tenho coisas pra fazer, penso muito no futuro, e não imagino você fora dele. Só não sei se você... se você quer fazer parte de tudo isso também.

Ele ficou em silêncio pensando, mas quando ergueu o olhar viu a confirmação nos olhos dele. Kuku era seu, assim como você pertencia a ele.

- É que... com você nunca teve essa parada de palavras... pra mim o "eu te amo" bastava, ou nem isso... quando você ri das minhas piadas idiotas, quando faz brigadeiro ou me ensina português, quando vai pra casa da minha mãe às oito da noite porque ela não consegue digitar a senha da netflix.. achei que tudo isso mostrava o quanto você me amava e isso já é o suficiente pra mim... Desculpa por não sacar se era o suficiente pra você mas... Sn, eu te amo. Você quer casar na igreja? Eu caso. Você quer filhos? Eu quero desde que você seja a mãe! Você quer acordar seis da manhã pra fazer aquela porra daquela maratona, eu sou seu parceiro. Pra vida toda, minha neña. Pra vida toda.

E foderam lentinho.

O pedido oficial veio dias depois acompanhado de porra dentro.

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MATÍAS RECALT - Norman Fucking Rockwell

Godman, man-child. He fucked me so good that I almost said I love you.

Apesar da música ser tristonha, tem um trechinho específico que é totalmente ele. Não vou elaborar muito mais porque em breve vem um imagine só relacionado à`isso.

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ENZO VOGRINCIC - Sad Girl

Being a mistress on the side It might not appeal to fools like you Creeping around on the side Might not be something you would do But you haven't seen my man... He´s got the fire. And he walks with it... His Bonnie on the side, Bonnie on the side Makes me a sad, sad girl His money on the side, money on the side Makes me a sad, sad girl

É invevitavel pensar nele ouvindo essa. Apesar de "ultraviolence" ser quase o sobrenome dele nos edits....

Vocês namoravam a uns bons meses mas ele ainda não tinha vindo a público revelar o romance secreto. Você tinha ciúmes das fãs dele, mesmo que Enzo deixasse bem claro o amor por você e que nunca, nunquinha daria bola para nenhuma outra mulher.

Foi quando ele te convidou para um tapete vermelho que seu mundo caiu no chão. Caralho, ele iria te assumir... e não um post basiquinho no instagram, ele te levaria para o mundo dele.

Ele te amava? Não tinha dúvidas... mas ali, ao lado dele no tapete de gala em meio aos desconhecidos e famosos, você parecia uma menininha assustada.

Principalmente quando ele sussurrava sacanagens no ouvido em frente às câmeras: te assumia para o mundo enquanto falava o quão forte ia te foder no banheiro do evento.

E depois daquele dia, vieram outros eventos os quais o agente dele fazia questão que você estivesse presente. Sempre a "Bonnie" ao lado de Clyde. Ele caminhava com elegância, com sensualidade e te exibia como um troféu.

Se sentia burra por ter aceitado aquilo.

Meses depois descobriu que ele havia ganhado maior grana com a sua presença nos eventos, afinal, todos queriam saber quem era a garota que ele escolheu.

Você não terminou com ele.

Era só mais uma garota triste.

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AGUSTÍN PARDELLA - Salvatore

Catch me if you can, working on my tan Salvatore. Dying by the hand of a foreign man Happily. Calling out my name, in the summer rain. Cia, amore.

O Pardella é verão, né?

Se conheceram quando? No verão! Onde? Numa praia brasileira paradísiaca em que ambos foram passar as férias.

Você tomava sol e lambia um sorvete azedinho ao lado de suas amigas enquanto observava o grupinho de gringos tagarelantes que jogava altinha ali próximo.

Tinha um em especial, que te chamou a atenção... os cabelos loiros e olhos verdes contrastavam com a pele bronzeada, quase que dourada, do rapaz.

E não era boba, ele te olhava também.

Na cabeça de Pardella, ele rezava para que a bola escapulisse e caísse bem na tua cara para que tivesse uma desculpa para se aproximar de você.

E foi o que aconteceu.

Não que tivesse caído no seu rosto, mas próximo o suficiente para você soltar um berro e ele vir correndo se desculpar.

-Desculpa! Desculpa - disse com um português espanholsado.

Seu sorvete avia caído na areia e agora parecinha um espetinho besuntado na farinha.

-VEN LUEGO, BOLUDO! - os amigos gritaram. Ele olhou para trás e voltou a te encarar.

-Sn - repetiu seu nome baixinho - Assim que a partida terminar yo volto aca, si?

Você só sorriu marrentinha mas assim que Pardella saiu dali, suas amigas começaram a gritar que "HOJE TEM TAN TAN TAN".

...

Minutos depois começou a sentir os pingos de água gelada em sua pele quente... uma chuva de verão estava a caminho. Sem nem se lembrar de Agustín juntou suas coisas, bateu a canga até a chuva engrossar... então saíram correndo.

Isso até você ouvir os gritos:

-SN, SN!

Ele te alcançou quase que sem folego e enquanto a chuva caía, trocaram os instas com a promessa de se encontrar em algum barzinho de noite.

E provavelmente, aquela noite "teve tan tan tan".

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FER CONTIGIANI - Fuck it I love you.

Wish that you would hold me or just say that you were mine It's killing me slowly... If I wasn't so fucked up, I think I'd fuck you all the time

E VAI TER KUKU CORNINHO e depois falecide SIM! E FER TALARICO

Ele era amigo do seu namorado, caralho. A primeira vez Kuku estava viajando e você odiava dormir sozinha depois de que o apartamento de vocês havia sido assaltado meses antes, ele mesmo que deu a idéia:

-Por que você não chama o Fernando? Ele dorme na sala, cuida de você... se quiser eu ligo pra ele mais tarde.

Você aceitou, só não esperava que ficassem tão bêbados pós risoto com filé mignon. Sentaram no sofá rindo enquanto Contigiani contava as histórias e memórias dele e foram se aproximando.

Fernando te beijou primeiro, logo você não traíu.

No dia seguinte, acordou com uma ressaca e odiando aquele rostinho bonito de Contigiani. Tomaram café da manhã em silêncio até seu telefone tocar.... Kuku tinha sofrido um acidente na estrada e estava em coma.

Você chorou e chorou e chorou e Fernando te segurou para que não desabasse, tanto fisicamente quanto emocionalmente.

Ao longo dos meses Fernando havia sido seu porto seguro, um grandiosíssimo amigo.

Você se sentia fodida e depressiva.

Trabalhava dobrado para pagar as contas carérrimas do hospital e mal tinha tempo para... para ser feliz. Seus únicos momentos bons eram quando Fer vinha te visitar. Sempre trazia flores e um bom vinho para acalentar seu coração.

Esse fim de semana você estava mais abatidada que o normal já que o médico disse que o quadro do seu marido era praticamente irreversível.

Depois os jantar seguiram a rotina de sentar no sofá e tentar rir de algumas besteiras, mas nesse dia Contigiani tinha um propósito e era se declarar.

Quando sentaram perto, olhos nos olhos e nas bocas, ele achou que você o queria... e você o queria, mas não podia fazer aquilo. Encostou a mão no peito dele e falou:

-Sinto muito, Nando - ele se afastou envergonhado - Se eu já não estivesse tão fodida... foderia com você. Mas não posso, pelo Kuku.

-Pelo Kuku - ele sussurrou baixinho - Sinto muito, Sn. Não sei o que tava passando pela minha cabeça.

Então ele levantou e foi embora sem se despedir.

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PIPE OTAÑO - Blue Jeans

Blue jeans, white shirt. Walked into the room, you know you made my eyes burn. It was like James Dean, for sure.... I will love you till the end of time

preguiça, mas um dia você volta aqui que estará escritokkkkkkkkkkk

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UFA! Acho que por hoje foi kkkkkkk

[niteshade925]

Lesson: NEVER let the people who position themselves as your enemies tell your story. You MUST tell your own story.

lmaoooo netflix adaptation of 3 body problem is *really* going in on the anticommunism shit. the trailer hinted that they changed mike evans' character from an ecofascist to a communist lmaoooooooo exploding netflix

[wallydarlingsnumber1]

posting my cringe old shit i wrote on wattpad. #1

OH GOD. help me. | SMUT | [ P A I R I N G ] ; Ayato Aishi x Reader [ WARNINGS ] ; P in V, Unprotected sex, AND BAD STUPID SMUT. last fucking warning! under the cut you promise to willingly suffer for your actions of this smut.

Prompt : Ayato (male Ayano Aishi) gets horny and starts making out with female!reader :)

I asked my bestie for a prompt so uh here we go 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

BURN!! ^^^(i might delete this chapter idfk) (maybe ill make a masc one >:v) Also this is my first smut so it might be bad 💀💔

Comment here what the adventure was like after the story 💙

(Also you guys are in ur house n shit Its also night Netflix And chill (Even though my bestie didn't say this but i thought to just add this 💀💔))

💔💔💔💔- Ayato's pov Oh my gosh. She fucking right there next to me. Im gonna blow up right now. She's so pretty. Her gorgeous E/C(eye color) colored eyes. The most beautiful H/L(Hair length) hair she has. She dressed up in her little favorite jammies. So cute and only for me.

I wanna fuck her.

I felt hard but ignored it, and grabbed one of the pillows and my legs with it to make sure she wouldn't see.

💙💙💙💙-Y/N's Pov

I felt Ayato's eyes lay on me, i felt tension growing.

I just continue on watching the movie, leaning onto Ayato. My hands move over to his hands and held it. He seemed suprised, but caressed my hands gently.

I kissed him on his cheeks. Smiling at him like a cute little doll.

A few minutes later during the movie

I felt his cold hands snake onto my thigh and rub it gently. I was getting butterflies. He used his free hand to reach for my chin and smiled at me. He kissed me softly. He whined a bit when i pulled away but we both smiled at each other. He pushed me to lay down on the sofa. "Y/N, please~," he said crawling over me. He covered my neck with gentle kisses. I shivered at how cold he was.

He scooted over closer and started to take off my pants and my undergarments.

Revealing my pussy. He took off his own and revealed his member, with some little precum on its tip. It was... Probably a bit big to say the least to fit it in. He inserted his long, cold, finger inside and started to pump it in and out.

"Does that feel good, My little sweetheart?~" said the man with lust-filled eyes. Admiring the scene of you being finger-fucked by him. And i mean, only, Him. "Ye-Yes~" you quietly moaned out. He stopped and inserted two fingers inside you this time and pumped it in and out slowly. You whined out; "P-please~ Ayato, put it in~" His fingers stopped again and smirked at you, his cock was throbbing anyway. He inserted in slowly.

"Tell me when it hurts or you when want to stop, okay?~ I dont want to hurt you THAT much~" he started moving in and out of you. He chuckled. Which, kind of made you a bit worried.

Only a minute passed and you were already moaning mess.

It hurt a little but you didn't care. "H-Haah!~ AYATO!~" You moaned out, "Thats fucking right, moan out my name. Let everyone know how much of a slut you are for me and me only, let everyone know you are mine~"

Now that? That was so fucking hot for you to handle.

He started to suck on your neck and leave hickeys and sped up. "You like it when i do this to you? Hm?" He said, he wasn't even close to being done with you.  You moaned, loving the feeling and sensations he had given you. You were close to your climax and so was he.

You came and he did too, of course he pulled out before doing so. "Oh my~..." He chuckled, You tried to sit up but you were pinned back down. "Now, now! We aren't completely done yet~" He rubbed your pussy, he chuckled and loved the thought for another round, the movie seemed to not be done yet, the time was 1:34 am, did you both care? Nope. You both continued.

For what felt like hours. And hours. You both had 3 rounds. The aftercare he gave you was nice though. He loved you so much. Your leg was very sore still though...

Guess you wont be able to walk tomorrow.

___

Oh my gosh what dafuq. WHY DID I DO THIS DURING MY WHOLE ENTIRE CLASS HELP

END OF THAT CRAPPY SHIT I COPY AND PASTED. I HATE IT. BUT YEAH.

anyways listen to bag of bones in album 'lush' by mitski bbyz baiiii xoxo

[frasier-crane-style]

Very early on in this movie, hero Christian Grey gives da chick the standard romantic leading man speech about how he's bad news--a loner, Dottie, a rebel--and she should still clear of him. At this point, they've gone out to get coffee one time and he's saved her from a careening bike messenger. I know it must be exciting to tell a lady that she should stay away from your twisted mind for her own feminine good, but dude, save it for at least the second date.

This came to Netflix, so I figured I might as well give a shot. It's a failure, obviously, but it's an interesting failure. There are talented people both on screen and behind the scenes, and it looks like a movie, but all their efforts amount to putting lipstick on a pig. Would it be unfairly inside-baseball to repeat the reports of a troubled production, with the author insisting on an adaptation that was too faithful for its own good?

Try not to do a shot every time heroine Anastasia Steele* extravagantly bites her lower lip in lust.

(how come Dakota Johnson's character name in this is way more silly than the name of the literal superhero she played?)

To be fair to the movie, I've seen a ton of waggish assholes like, well, me, declare that this movie is a camp classic of unintended hilarity and guys, c'mon. There's no way they didn't intend "What are buttplugs?" as a laughline.

In fact, with Dakota Johnson's sitcom star comedic timing and winsome charm, watching this movie is a bit like finding a coke-begotten relic of the 80s where some madman paired Meg Ryan and Rutger Hauer (it doesn't help that, as "Mr. Grey," they cast an actor that plays serial killers about as often as heartthrobs).

I'm making this story sound interesting, but it's not able to succeed on its own terms, as whenever it tries to get serious, the drama runs headlong into a howler of a line that must be verboten from the books. "I'm fifty shades of fucked up!" Christian groans at one point.

"I don't make love. I fuck. Hard," is another line that even Sir Michael Caine couldn't get into working order.

It's a shame, because there's no real reason a modern-day gothic romance can't work. Sure, there's no real plot to the thing besides Ana and Christian's doomed/not-so-doomed romance, but there are worse foundations for a movie than a relationship where the guy wants to hurt his lady love as much as romance her. It's fucked up, but imagine what a Cronenberg or Verhoeven could do with the assignment. Well, full frontal, probably.

(The compromise to keep Jamie Dornan from spending a third of the movie displaying the status of his circumcision is that he does most every sex scene in a worn pair of jeans. I probably should've been too stunned by his abs to wonder at this, but dude's a billionaire. Is he doing yardwork in those jeans? Home repair? Or have they gotten all the holes in them purely from screwing? Man, that guy does fuck. Hard.)

You know, given that bondage is a pretty common fetish, you'd think Christian Grey--an ubersexy twenty-something billionaire--would be able to find a woman who's into, y'know, all that--especially since his wildest antics are a little whipping and possible anal fisting.

I know there'd be no story if he didn't immediately fall in love with Anastasia Steele (snicker) and if she wasn't only putting up with the bondage to get the package deal. Still, that is a pretty contrived starting point, isn't it? At least Team Edward has the excuse of that whole 'my own personal brand of heroin' thing.

[147-moths]

lots of people have been saying the exact same thing but honestly netflix's biggest and most frustrating problem is that they really do treat audiences like the biggest of dumbasses. yea we've seen this time and time again but we have two perfect examples rn in the live action atla and 3 body problem. erasing sokka's misogyny and "internationalising" 3 body by?? making everyone british?? perfectly encompass this descent into dumbed-down everything. i get that there would've been people misinterpreting sokka's arc and i get that there would've been people complaining about the chinese names or whatever but by catering to that specific subset of the audience you lose so much nuance and complexity!! but alas, profits.

also one of the major criticisms against the three body problem was the characters being one-dimensional and dull but like. is this better? is shoehorning romantic relationships fucking everywhere better?? what the fuck is up with ye wenjie and mike evans. WHO asked for this. benedict wong as da shi is perfect but why the fuck is his name CLARENCE

[jessiescock]

Fucking unmöglich tbh nix gegen die Lena aber is this some kind of cruel joke dass die erste Folge sans Hansi mehr drauf fokussiert ist dass sie geht als dass der TITULAR CHARACTER HIER DURCHGESTRICHEN WIRD PLÖTZLICH

Jetzr kriegt die auch noch nen Blumenstrauß und der Riedl weint

[justanotherdrfan]

WELCOME ALL DANNY FANGIRLS TO YOUR INSTALMENT OF DANIEL RICCIARDO’S DTS BREAKDOWN! 🍯🦡

I’m leaving this one open since you all skipped straight to this episode! (I waited and I don’t know how)😂

S6E9 (Three’s a Crowd)

GIF by @arturleclerc

DANNNNNNNNYYY BOYYY 😍😍😍😍😍😍

He’s already laughing (god I love him)

‘Alright, what’s up?, Daniel Ricardo, this is season six drive to survive, and yes I’m back’ (fangirling HARD)

WAIT HE WAS IN SYDNEY, HE WAS IN FUCKING SYDNEY (why did no one tell me I would have called sick at work)

Daniel and Blake I really wish you went ahead with that podcast because you two are poetic chaos together

Cue another Daniel montage (they have his whole discography on file don’t they?)

He looks so fucking tried though

Logan and Alex talking about DTS frothing at the mouth about Daniel returning is the most factually, correct thing I’ve ever heard 😂

Logan: ‘All I know is the most excited people when Danny Ricciardo came back was Netflix.’

Alex: ‘I literally think they had to change their pants three times. I know the episode already. Let…let me run it through. Ready? Here we have Danny Ricciardo watching on the sidelines. “Yeah, it hurts to not be racing.” Then all of a sudden, pans to Nyck de Vries. Lock up. [imitates brakes screeching]. Off the track. Crash. Oh shit! Boom. Fast-forward. Silverstone. Test. Daniel Ricciardo. Super quick. [laughs] Danny looking at it like…big smile on his face. “It is what it is. You know?” [man]“I never left��� “I never left. I’m back,baby. Honey Badger. Don’t give a shit.” (Hire him now DTS because he nailed that)

Fuck why they got to follow that shit with Zandvoort though

Daniel whoring about in his Enchante tattoo thigh high shorts

“Feels right. Feels good” (It sure does Danny is sure does)

EVERYONE LOVES DANIEL

And they get him straight to a photoshoot to whore him out

THEY DID NOT USE HIM WINKING IN THE INTRO (da fuck you lot doing? Give the people what they want)

Yes Christian 2025 prospect (he’s a shoe in ahh? See what I did there) 😉👟🍾

FUCK YOU MICAHEL ITALIANO (why is he getting air time) I’m glad he’s left F1

OHH NO OHH NO OHH NO NO NO NO NO NO

IM CRYING AGAIN. I CRIED WHEN IT HAPPENED AND IM CRYING AGAIN

Ohh they have his X-ray

Clairey bear

Cue Liam Lawson (I do love you but I missed Danny terribly)

The others telling Liam to be prepared (this is very welcome to our toxic work environment)

‘She doesn’t even go here’ (a Danica story)

Liam out qualifies all the red bull drivers (yes kiddo)

DANNY BACKS (SCREWS AND ALL) for engineering purposes only

Umm why are you hurting him? DONT TOUCH HIM! (Look yes I know it’s physiotherapy and he needs it. But I’ve broken my hand before the left one as well and driving a normal road car caused me to cry in pain so when I say don’t touch him I mean it)

I SWEAR TO GOD ZAK YOU STAY THEY HELL AWAY FROM HIM

Checo clips Yuki and he’s out (he probably thought it was Daniel trying to take his seat. It’s his in 2025 mate there’s no fighting it)

Ohh look Alpine with reliability issues (things you continue to see)

Yes DTS let’s show Russel’s crash from another angle 😂

POINTS FOR LIAM 🎉🥳

Are we positive he was in Sydney and not Perth?

Yes king SWEAT SWEAT SWEAT

Yuki GP time

Not Suzuka having Daniel, Yuki and Liam on all the banners

Poor Yuki being overwhelmed by the fans. I understand fans being excited but he’s cornered in the car and clearly doesn’t feel safe (and for Michael to be like it’s ok the fans are happy is actually the problem at hand. His and all the drivers safety has to come first and he point blank didn’t feel safe you arsehole Michael so it’s not okay)

Yuki honey it’s okay Liam not going to hit you

If we can’t have an Aussie a Kiwi will do

Liam finding out Daniel’s and Yuki are getting announced for 2024 🥺

Liam mate I’m sorry you deserve better

Mexi-coooooo

HES BACK BACK

Yes yes your P10 in the constructors (just you wait, just you fucking wait)

Checo out before turn 1 (its AUSGP all over again)

Ohh look another McLaren/Alpha Tauri incident 😤

No McLaren the plan is not to attack Daniel (haven’t you fucking done enough?)

P7 BABBYYYYYY

ENCHANTE, MON AMI

See your P8 now (told you to wait and see)

Yes Christian, Daniel did drive a good race (remember that and who didn’t)

Look at him and his little moustache

Will: ‘ I think this is only part one of a far wider story.’ (Yes 2024 season will be epic for Danny Ric)

[alasijia]

FUCK ADS!

ft. mikage reo

summary : when your stupidly rich lover sees you complaining about ads for the nth time.

wc : 556

note : was watching a kdrama that was unavailable on netflix and disney plus and istg im abt to drop it if i have to keep watching ads every 10 minutes 😕😕 + the drama im describing is inspired by a drama my friend forced me to watch during free period. it was funky as hell but it suited this short scenario lolz

masterlist

"Why do you even care? This was purely business after all." A girl plainly stated through the phone, unknowing of the pained expression of the other end's receiver.

"Fine then, so be it. Leave, and never return." The guy said, anger clearly lacing his tone. It was clear he was unsure with his feelings, a mix of anger, sadness, and disappointment, mainly at himself.

You gasped, sitting up straighter, "No! Don't you dare let her slip that easily!" You half-screeched, toning down your voice as to not bother your boyfriend who was doing his homework. It was to no avail anyway, as he quirked an eyebrow at your silent screaming that to him, sounded like the sound that would come out of a dying horse.

"NOOO– I CAN'T. DON'T YOU DA–" You nearly sobbed, until the screen of your phone went blank for a second, before playing a video of a girl promoting a shampoo. You went speechless, mouth still hung open after being interrupted. "You okay?" Reo asked, fully turning to face you, noticing your sudden silence compared to the wailing you'd been doing before.

"Reo... I'm gonna cry. Why do advertisements exist?" You groaned, plopping down on your boyfriend's bed, throwing your phone away. The audio of the ad changed into one of a song advertising a shopping app. (indo readers, iykyk. pengiriman cpt, gratis ongkir, hanya di lazada 🤕🤕)

Reo sat down next to you, picking up your phone. "How else would companies and apps like these make money, hmm?" He rhetorically asked, tapping away at your phone. You looked up at him, watching him do... whatever it is he needed to do on your phone.

"What're ya doing?" You asked after a short while, playing with the lose string on his sweatpants. "Mm.. Nothing. Don't worry your pretty little head about it." He says, continuing his business, and moving away everytime you tried to catch sight of what he's doing on your phone. "That's my phone, though..." You sighed, missing the glorious sight of handsome and beautiful men and women on your screen.

"Just give me a moment more, 'kay, baby?" And he kept his words, as he passed your phone back to you shortly after. "Ugh, he is so hot." You rolled over on your stomach, watching intently as the main lead's brother sits across the dining table from the main lead, picking on his food. "He's rich like you too, Reo." You pointed out, and now that, caught his attention. He gasped in mock offense. Snatching the phone away, he grimaced. "Nah, he doesn't even have half the looks or charisma I've got!" He scoffs, eyeing the man shown on the screen.

"Hey, give that back!" You reached for your phone, to which he simply put his arm up, effortlessly keeping it oit of reach from you, who had your arm out while laying on the bed. "Not until you say I'm better than him." You playfully rolled your eyes at your boyfriend's antics. "Mikage Reo, my love, you are a thousand times better than this completely fictional character on a screen. Happy?" You looked up at him, boring your eyes into his purple ones. He looked back at you with a satisfied smile, "Very." He happily hands you your phone, before getting up and resuming his homework.

Funnily enough, you didn't find yourself having to worry about ads anymore as you continued to watch your k-drama. (or j-drama, c-drama, anime, movie, heck even cartoons. i don't judge 🤷‍♀️)

[yaldagor]

So ich bin jetzt mit meinem SE- Rewatch-a-thon fertig, hab im Januar mit Staffel 1 Folge 1 angefangen und bin diese Woche bei Folge 1078 aufgeschlagen.

Was nun?

Gibts irgendwelche Empfehlungen was man bis zum nächsten Jahr schauen kann? Möglichst nichts, was ein extra Abo erfordert (ich hab Netflix, Spotify und Amazon Prime und das is mir eigentlich alles schon zuviel)

Von den üblichen (und aktuellen) Verdächtigen schon gesehen habe ich:

Spatort Tatort Berlin Polizeiruf 110 Świecko Druck und Skam Everyone is fucking crazy

Heartstopper schau ich gerade, ist mir aber an sich zu "cute". Young Royals habe ich so in meinem "Vielleicht" Stapel.

Bin für alle Ideen dankbar., suche aber eher nach Sachen die nach 2020 erschienen sind, die älteren Sachen habe ich vermutlich schon gesehen.

[popculturebuffet]

Next up for Warner Bros Animation, favorite character from the 2002-08 half of the Kids WB shows with: Mucha Lucha, Ozzy & Drix, What's New Scooby Doo, Xiaolin Showdown, The Batman, Johnny Test (this oughta be interesting since it aired on three different networks with varying seasons of quality with seasons 1-3 premiering on Kids WB, seasons 4-6 being produced for Cartoon Network, and the revival seasons being produced for Netflix), Loonatics Unleashed, Tom & Jerry Tales, Shaggy & Scooby Doo Get a Clue, and Legion of Superheroes? I skipped Coconut Fred since everyone and their mother despises that show (one of the worst of all time).

Jesus Christ that's a lot. Also look given some past entires here, Coconut Fred is being kept on the grounds that it shoudn't be forgotten just for being horrible. like da boom crew which I thankfully haven't seen. So anyways..

Coconut Fred's Fruit Salad Island: I saw it at the time and it.. sure does exist. It's a half hearted spongebob ripoff. I'm talking about it because it did exist but don't have much else. Maybe I shoudl've left it out but i've let worse shows have an entry. This is just.. ntohing.

Mucha Lucha: IT'S A WAY OF LIFE! Senior Hasbena who just had a fun voice and a great early spotlight episode. The show itself is one I need to revisit but is awesome as hell, having a nice respect for luchadore culture while also being pretty nonsesically fun. While I would love a full on wrestling action series, this one was still good fun and needs ot be avaliable to stream in some fashion.

Ozzy and Drix: Drix if only because he was my faviorite in the movie. This series feels.. unecessary. It's not a bad idea but both frank's state at the start and Ozzie and Drix ending up elsewehere make it feel like the first film didn't matter and it feels weird to just.. not keep the setting. If they wanted kid plots, Frank has a daughter. That gripe aside the series was ... eh. Not terrible, but nothing really super special either.

Xiaolin Showdown: Jack Spicer. The boy, the myth the legend and Danny Cooksy's best role by a wide margin. A fun villian who was laughable enough to never get boring and stick around long after he'd been outclassed by newer big bads. Xiaolin Showdown is one of the best cartoons of this era, one of the best of this action show block and one of the best. I rewatched it in college and was amazed it held up so well. The show is genuine about our four heroes working, said four heroes while having familiar archetypes for the most part, are great characters who are a load of fun to watch and the format of the showdowns is engagin: while it does usually lead to some form of fight the contest format adds a nice wild card to it: our heroes can end up in a game where telling the truth is the only way out, a soccer match for OMi's soul, or a battle royale with all present. IT's a wonderful show I wish would get a proper revivial. And no Chronciles dosen't count, chronciles can go fuck itself.

The Batman: Another one to revisit and i'd say clayface as the twist of him being someone batman knew and trusted is utterly guttnig. I gave up on this one early for petty reasons depsite having most of the toys: I hated what they did with mr freeze and felt it couldn't compare to btas. Time has passed and with the later seasons adding some nice swerves i've accepted the show is it's own thing, trying to be a more action oriented shonen to forge it's own identity from the more moody btas. And it did apparently get better and better as it went and having seen a later episode or two casually , I can agree. Plus I admit to loving the touch of having batgirl join up before batman. Also the movie where he fights dracula is fucking dope and wel lworth your time.

Johnny Test: I'd say the twins for being usually hilaroius. As for the show.. it's eh. I used to hate it

But I now see it as an okay show that had some fun bits, and what I saw of the revival, as sadly short lived as it was, was better. It's still not AMAZING, but it wasn't the mindless garbage it got labeled as either. Nor a dexter's lab ripoff.. I do think they took some inspriation from it clearly, I mean look at the twins... but when you look at the cast none of them really match up to dexter's aside from the twins, whose crush on gil and age diffrenate them just enough. It's not an amazing show but it's hate was overblown.

Loonatics Unleahsed: Look the base concept of "The looney tunes as superhero: could be fun. I have a batman daffy and superman bugs on my desk as I type this. They did skits of the kind. The problem is lonatics wanted to be batman beyond with looney tunes and it never worked as a kid and dosen't work now.

Tom and Jerry Tales; I love tom and jerry but i've barely seen this.

Shaggy and Scooby Doo Get a Clue: The timing on this one as good as i've been watching through this on and off with @jess-the-vampire recently. I don't really have a faviorite. As for the show itself it's overhated like the last two entries and honestly.. it's okay. It's nothing amazing thus far, trying to be venture bros by having henchman 2 be an obvious ripoff of 21. Which wouldn't bother me if they did it right but instead he's just annoying. That being said it's still not a terrible series: the theme song is terrible but the show itself is solid, having intresting sometimes bonkers plot and shoudlnt' be vilified for breaking formula. It may not entirely work.. but I can respect TRYING something new an dhope go go mystery machine is a better version of this.

Legion of Super Heroes: Bouncing Boy: this series kept his goofy powers but also what works: someone who badly wanted to join the legion, never gave up and then threw in his reboot self's pilot skills and flsehd out his perosnality.

As for the show i'm a big legion of superheroes fan and this show is part of what brought me to the clubhouse. It's a slick show that nicely merges the two continuties it had to work with: the pre zero our one from the silver age and beyond and the reboot that helped ground things (The third reboot, yes three and there was a fourth long after, was just happening around this time so only star boy being black made the cut from there), while keeping the silver age namesan dastetic from before.

The result is a fun show that loves the legion dearly, has a great cast of characters and despite being made to have a teen superman show dosen't let clark overshadow everyone else: he's the lead.. but most of the main cast get a focus episode over the course of season 1. I"ll admit season 2 isn't quite as good as due to executive mandates the female cast is sidelined in places and imperix is a boring villian, while superman x, superman but EDGGGYYYYY just isn't that intresting. But season 2 isn't all bad with some standout episodes, the addition of chameleon boy and a truly chilling arc with brainy and an old friend I won't spoil for those who haven't seen the show. This series is a little seen gem that needs more love.

I realized as we worked on this I almost forgot something important, a series that begs for the spotlight so..

What's New Scooby Doo: We're comin after you, we're gonna solve that mystery. This is a hard one as the gang is reinvented well but i'd have to go with Fred, whose goofiness begins. After the great prequel that was pup named scooby doo and the success of the live action movie, What's New was a reinvention of the franchise in an odd way: it goes back to the gangs old actors , minus grey delise making her debut as daphne, and old style of writing thigns but updates it in a way that dosen't feel too dated now: sure the gang does extreme sports, but it's not to rocket power levels and fits for Daphne.

This series also cements fred and daphne's new roles going forward, roles that helped keep the character fresh despite the dozens of films and handful of series to come. Fred was dialed back from teh conpsiarcy theroist of pup, but instead became the bumbling tourist, a tad awkawrd in places and a tad over excited in others. It added nice layers to him besides solving mysteries and bullying his best friend and it left the door open for him to get reinvented a lot. Daph meanwhile, got a welcome reinvention that let her fit into the classic gang better: like her pup counterpart she often uses fashion, her wealth is more displayed (if not used as a fucntion) but her friendly nature and willingness to get into things (or easliy getting into activties she hated at first), all debuted here.

What's New is a fun series: shorter than you'd think, but having watched it about twice with jess , it holds up really well, combinging the usual formula with some fun hyjinks and creative setups. Sometimes it was bonkers, but it was a solid return to form that let the series experiment more with the next few, and deserves more credit for helping codify a lot of the modern franchise.