#Nagging migraine

[wickedzeevyln]

On Goodbyes

Saying goodbye shouldn’t be that hard, but the never-ebbing ache in our chests sweeps us to despair, we know from the beginning there is a point where the road ends, at least for us. When the closing of the eyes opens portals of unseen light sailing skyward to bind with eternity there is a constant twitch somewhere deep inside perhaps from that of a void left behind. In our solitude, we curl…

[tero-ga]

Aaaaanother TGAA SwapAU stuff and it is my wonderful boy Albert as the prosecutor!!

I've changed some of the designs in this one like the jacket color to white to make a resemblance of a lab coat and reflecting of Kazuma white school uniform, as well trying to bring more Frankenstein's Monster vibe too hehe (aaand make him look more miserable too). He is also have a locket that have a painting of him and his two brothers, it was given by Andrew during his wedding!

I also made bunch of character that related to Swap!Albert's life from 10 years ago, like Andrew(Klint's roleswap) and his other brother Michael, university Barok and Albert, etc. more info about the are there down below 👇👇

First of I wanted to say I'm sorry I can't do full render of everyone here, do that with all of them would be death sentence for me so I couldn't do it 😭😭 Anyway without further ado, I'm going right into it! Start from left to right!

This first one Ryunosuke father replacing as Genshin Asogi. At first while brainstorming I was thinking of maybe do three switch around with Genshin, Jigoku, and Yujin but the it somehow felt weird for me. Then the thought of maybe involving Auchi in this too (like, imagine him being swap with Jigoku wouldn't that be funny and terrifying thought), but discarded that idea out because of Menimemo would have no one to swap with (i have to i'm sorry). Sooo I ended just design him from scratch, he is quite easy to figure out since Genshin doesn't really have much going on with him, but since we don't have any idea of original Ryunosuke's parents at all I have to take idea from something else, and that is his daruma doll for his eyes (he is half blind!! :D) and Phoenix DD/SOJ design (droopy hair and light vest) and everything else is from Genshin. His name is Ryuuki Naruhodo since Ryunosuke is another name for Ryuichi so I want to keep the train going!!

Andrew the screwdriver, oh I missed him- Anyway, I redesign his outfit because tbh his previous outfit is ridiculous 😭 it's funny and fun but I do want to take him seriously now. I'm tried to keep the A shape still but it's less subtle now, I think it turned out okay!! (Oh yeah, his cane is supposed to be a hidden sword but i forgot to put that in the drawing 😭). I was supposed to make his bowtie red like the hair tie but then I realized it will getting rid of the purpose of the hair tie (it referencing the blood on the tip of the screwdriver) so I ended up making it color silver.

The Lady Baskerville, I gave her similar design to Sunny(Herlock!Swap) with the bowtie, color palette to his mascot, and hair on her. I'm not really quite fond with her design, maybe I'll do redesign her again if I got a idea pop up like crazy but in the meantime this is her design.

Guess who is this?? Another one of Albert's tool is here finally!! Michael the crosshead screwdriver! Since we never see Michael anywhere and only mentioned once in the game he is, I'm just draw simple design for him (I wished I could put M shape in the design but I have no idea WHERE to put it 😭 so I tried used the bowtie for it). I also thought it would be nice to make him a defense attorney so I made the design for the badge too. Since he is sadly not going to be mentioned a lot in this AU since I'm trying to make the storyline same as the original, so I made a backstory of what happened in the fun fact tags. There was supposed to be more tool to be added but my god that would be taxing to design, so I have to make only Andrew and Michael as his only siblings.

The doggie Balmung replacement, Bolt, He is a Irish Setter! Beforehand he was supposed to be Borzoi but then research the background of the breed I don't how difficult it is to actually get one in that era so I have to changed breed :((

Albert and Barok in university days!! I just keep same as before like previous design!! There's a tiny change like the hair and the neckties.

There is going to be more content of them soon because I have a lot of ideas for them sooo stay tuned ;)

Here's the concept designs!!

[milopottz]

Making the conscious decision to dislike my upcoming neighbor C:

[theonlythingimfuckingisstupid]

watching kingsmen 2 with my whole family :(

[wosoamazing]

Flare Up

A Love Like This | Kyra Cooney-Cross x Williamson!R

Warnings: endometriosis, vomiting 1.5k words -> idk how I feel about it but yeah, let me know your thoughts, also I have another part coming out this morning (it's shorter). Also tried to make it accurate but some things may be incorrect.

You winced as you rolled over onto your side, curling into a ball, hoping to ease the sensation that your uterus was being stabbed whilst it tied itself in knots.  However you soon regretting the decision, the movement causing the throbbing in your head to intensify as you tightly shut your eyes. You weren't too sure if it was the migraine or your period that had waves of nausea crashing over you, however you were quickly distracted from the sensation as a zap of pain ran through your body, causing you to groan a little louder than you would’ve liked. Kyra had stayed the night and whilst you’d been together for a few months now and she knew you had endometriosis, and you’d spoken to her about it, you still felt like it was too early on in a relationship for this to happen. Most of the time the pain was easy to manage, however sometimes your body seemed to remember it had endometriosis and you were essentially debilitated, and it seemed to be one of those this month.

“Babe, you okay?” Kyra asked groggily, as she sat up in bed and shuffled closer to you.

“No, period” you managed to croak out.

“Do you need to go to the toilet?” Kyra asked, even though your periods weren’t always extremely painful they were always quite heavy and Kyra knew how much you hated leaking.

“No, already did,” you choked out and she nodded.

“I’m just going to go get you some things,” Kyra said softly as she placed a kiss on your temple, before she carefully got out of bed hoping not to jostle you too much. She’d ask Leah if she could have a conversation with her, hoping your sister would be able to tell Kyra more ways to help you then ‘leave me alone’, kyra knowing you didn’t actually want to be left alone, Leah happily agreed, and so Kyra had a large note on her phone dedicated to helping you, she she walked to the kitchen she pulled it up, placing her phone on the bench so she could pull out the copious amounts of medication you needed, she organised them into their respective groups as per Leah’s instructions, before getting your heat pad and some other items.

-

“Cuddles,” you mumbled and Kyra nodded quickly standing up to get the aircon remote so she could turn it on, knowing you slept hot and cuddling made that worse, she laid down next to you, her upper body slightly propped up by pillows, you climbed on top of her, your head resting on her chest, as her hands slipped up the back of your shirt, drawing mindless patterns on your back.

“Go to sleep, it’s still early, but please wake me if you need anything,” Kyra murmured into the top of your head.

“Thank you,” you mumbled as you felt yourself drifting off, Kyra had managed to get you to keep a few plain crackers down so you could take your tablets.

You drifted off into a fitful sleep, the gentle rise and fall of Kyra’s chest, and being wrapped up in her warmth helped the pain fade away briefly. However the dull ache in your abdomen morphed into a sharp stab, jarring you wake. You blinked harshly at the bright morning light spilling into the room, your head still heavy and throbbing. Kyra sensed your distress and tightened her arm around you before rubbing soothing circles on your back.

“You’re okay, just breathe,” she whispered, her voice a low hum. You took a deep breath shakily, letting it out slowly, trying to match her breaths, however just as you began to calm you panicked again, “what time is it?”

“Just after nine, I message Jonas that we weren’t coming in,” she replied, “you’ve been asleep for a while, do you need more tablets? Water? breakfast?” 

You shook your head, but the nagging thought of both of you missing training crept in, the dread of being a burden seeping in, “c-can we just sit here for a bit? I don’t want to think about anything,” you mumbled.

“Of course,” she said softly, shifting carefully up the bed so you could both sit up, wrapping a blanket around you and pulling you close again, resting her chin on the top of your head. It was cozy, even if your body screamed with every tiny shift. You let yourself relax into her side, the warmth of her body seeping into your aching bones, her bubble of comfort a welcome distraction.

“Do you want to watch a movie?” Kyra suggest, sensing that you needed something to take your mind off the pain, “something light, maybe a rom-com”

“Yeah, something where people fall in love and have no real problems, you laughed weakly, rolling your eyes playfully, “it would be nice though,” you admitted and she nodded, before picking a newer one, so you had to focus. The screen filled with soft colours as the movie played, and you found yourself slowly getting lost in the story, her fingers continued to draw patterns on your back, her touch soothing.

About halfway through, the pain intensified, and you winced, biting your lip to suppress a whimper, Kyra immediately noticed and paused the movie.

“Hey, you okay?” she asked, her brow furrowing with concern. As you went to reply a strong wave of nausea rolled through you, and before you could react you felt your stomach lurch, you scrambled to move to the edge of the bed but it was too late; you were spilling your stomach contents onto the bed, tears streaming down your face, “you’re okay, it’s okay,” Kyra soothed as she rubbed your back, getting up quickly to grab a towel, handing it to you so you could wipe your face.

“Sorry,” you mumbled.

“There’s no need to apologise, you’re sick, let’s just get you to the bathroom, hey?”

You nodded weakly, your face hot with shame, Kyra’s gentle demeanour helping you to feel safe as she helped you sit up and stand, wrapping an arm around your waist for support as you slowly made your way to the bathroom. Once inside you sat down next to the toilet, knowing that it was most likely not the last time you’d be sick, another wave of nausea hit you and you leaned over the toilet, the world spinning and your body shook as you heaved.

“It’s okay, just let it all out,” Kyra whispered as she rubbed circles into your back, when you finally finished you leant back against the cold wall, trying to catch your breath.

“I just came to check on you, but um, yeah, are you okay?” Leah asked as she walked into the bathroom, having seen the scene in the bedroom. You weakly shook your head as tears leaked out your tightly shut eyes.

“I’ll go change the sheets,” Kyra said softly sensing you needed Leah in that moment.

“Why does this have to happen,” you sobbed as your sister sat down next to you, wrapping her arm around you. You curled into her side, her presence offering a familiar comfort that you needed. “I hate it,” you murmured, voice trembling as the tears flowed freely, “why can’t it just be normal,”

Leah squeezed you tighter, her fingers brushing some hair away from your face, “I know, it’s not fair, but you’re strong, and we’re all here for you, I promise,” she said her voice steady and soothing.

Kyra returned a moment later, “I got you some fresh clothes, in case you want to change,” she said as she popped her head in.

“Thanks Ky,” Leah said softly, reaching to take the clothes off Kyra, Leah helped you change before guiding you back to the bedroom, where Kyra had changed the sheets, also having grabbed some more supplies, including multiple sickbags.

You climbed into bed lying next to kyra, your head on her chest, her arms moving to wrap around you softly.

“I’m just going to be downstairs, let me know if you need anything,” Leah told you, “can you take this for me first though?” she asked as she handed you an antiemetic, you nodded before swallowing it dry. You felt the  heaviness in your body lift slightly as you settled into Kyra’s warm embrace, the soft thud of heartbeat a steady presence as you navigated your feelings.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered again, “I didn’t want to ruin the morning.”

“Hey,” Kyra said softly tilting your chin up so you had to meet her eyes, “you didn’t ruin anything, you didn’t ask to have this condition and I knew it wasn’t always sunshine and lollipops, it’s what being together is about, helping the other and supporting each other through tough times,” she said sincerely before placing a soft kiss on your lips, “I love you so much and I would never left you suffer alone.”

[softfem-dom]

low iron days soft!loganxlowiron!reader

a/n : my low iron has come back to bite me in the ass so im making this post 😭

wc : 1K

LOW IRON COMFORT , FLUFF , SOFT! LOGAN , FATHERLY! LOGAN. origins! / dofp! logan oriented .

It was supposed to be a normal day. You know, the normal stuff, getting up, getting dressed, having breakfast, attending your day classes and then spending the evening doing whatever —probably going out of your way to annoy Logan a little aswell.

But, no. Of course the universe had to turn against you, and you woke up feeling as shitty as ever.

You groaned, rolling over in your bed and throwing an arm over your unexplicably tired eyes. Your head felt heavy, stuffy, and your body didn't feel right. You didn't really know why, but it felt as if you had ran two marathons and got ran over by a truck at the same time. Except you did know why, your fucking low iron.

You glanced to the side, trying to focus your blurry vission on the alarm clock. Narrowing your eyes, feeling a migraine starting to nag at the back of your head, while you strained your vission in a try of making out the numbers on it. 8:45. You were late.

In a sudden burst of self-consciousness about how embarassingly late you were for class, you sat up on the bed and quickly reached to grab the covers to pull them off you. Bad move. As soon as your body processed the movement your blurry eyes clouded with a variety of colorful spots dancing around the corners of your vission, head spinning.

After the I-just-woke-up fog cleared up, the headache was fully present by now. Drumming inside your head, making you whine softly at the uncomfortable pressure on your temples —your fingers flying to rub against them, trying to ease it up.

Your fucking anemia seemed to want to come and bite you in the ass.

Mainly, it was your fault, because you had 'forgotten' to take your pills for a while —but they tasted like fucking dogfood. Your took a deep breath, trying to fill your lungs with oxygen to try and cool down the headache, Logan was going to scold you for this you were sure.

After mentally preparing yourself you managed to get out of bed, one foot after the other, and lean onto the wall for additional support. It felt as if your body wasn't working, feeling heavy and slow and rusty. Was this how Logan felt when he said he was an old man?

You didn't have time to even walk, or try to at least, to your closet to get out of your pyjamas when you heard firm knocking on your door. You winced slightly, feeling as if the sound was echoing inside your head.

"bub" you heard a familiar gruff voice muffled from the wood of the door. "Scott sent me to find ya, said ya didn't come to his class"

His voice was grumbly, clearly annoyed that he had to walk all the way to the third floor of the huge building just to tell you to go to class.

You wanted to cry. Was it an immature response? Yes. Was it better to think about a solution to the problem instead of choosing the emotional option? Yes again. Did you want to chose the rational option instead of crying? Hell no.

So that was when a small sound ripled through your lips, choked and wet, your tired eyes getting moist and your body feeling like a heavy bag of rocks. And Logan's enchanced hearing catched it.

His hand was on the doorknob in a flash, fingers twisting around it and pulling the door open in less than a second. "hey, hey bub what's goin' on?" he grumbled as he strode over to you.

He was next to your side in a second, his instincts flaring up like crazy at the prospect of you crying which would be a reason for being in pain or discomfort. His big, warm, hands went to your shoulders, hazel eyes staring at you as he analyzed everything —how you were paler than usual and how sickly and unwell you looked. He rubbed his thumbs on your shoulders once or twice before his rough hands were going up to cup your cheeks.

They were wet, when had you started actually crying? You didn't really know.

"Logan.." you croaked out, voice breathy and almost sob-y. Your eyes with the strenght to barely look up at him from under your lashes.

"m'here bub, m'here" he quickly sushed you, his hands gently squishing your cheeks slightly —trying to ground you— before he caught onto something. He frowned, his nostrils flaring slightly as he sniffed the air, looking down at you. Your scent that was usually weak, now was almost non-existent.

He groaned softly, rolling his eyes softly because of course this was going to be about your iron problems. He saw the way your body felt heavy, your arms lifeless to your sides, before he was clicking his tongue at you when you tried to look down. "nothin' of that, c'mon, look'a me, yeah, there we go" he grumbled, his thumbs gently wiping away the feverish tears rolling down your cheeks. It was a split second of hesitance before he was leaning down and smacking a kiss against your forehead, his beard gently tickling your skin.

"this about the low iron, bub?" he asked softly, his voice a gentle whisper, his lips still against your forehead. Mouth that was known for saying the driest things now gently caressing your skin. It was his own way of checking your temperature, he noted you were a bit warmer than usual.

You nodded your head, a little "uh-huh" slipping past your lips in almost a hiccupy tone before his hands were leaving your face in favour of wrapping around you and lifting you up into his arms.

He was holding you with the ease of a mother holding a baby, one arm hooked under your legs and his big hand resting on the small of your back to keep you uptight against him. At the little sound you made, he huffed in affection before he was affectionately bumping his nose against your cheek —almost nosing it.

"you stayin' with me for the rest of the day, bub" he whispered, his voice low and rumbly as his breath hit the skin behind your ear. His arms safely wrapped around you before his lips moved to place another kiss on the skin behind your ear. Who would've guessed the Wolverine was so protective of his cub?

[orchidniins]

Forehead Kisses | Arthur Frederick

Summary: Arthur being the biggest green flag and taking care of his sick partner. Pairing: Arthur TV x gn!Reader Warnings: Fluff Word count: 1.3k+ A/N: Short one to start the week. I have a ton of requests that I'm currently working on at the moment (honestly I'm a lot slower at writing than I thought) and I'm hoping to get out 2 longer fics next week (if work doesn't keep me busy that is) 🤞 Thanks anon for the request! Hope you enjoy!

Masterlist

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As you step into your apartment, the door creaks softly behind you. You clutch your forehead, rubbing your temples in an attempt to ease your pounding migraine. Each step you take only worsens your body pains, leaving you feeling as though you've been hit by a truck. You shed your jacket and kick off your shoes, your body craves rest, wanting nothing more than to just curl up in bed. However, thoughts of the work you still have to complete nag at you, not wanting anything to pile up for the rest of the week.

Tossing your keys onto the table, the loud clatter disrupts the quietness of the room and you mentally curse yourself. You try to move as quietly as possible, not wanting to disturb Arthur, who had mentioned his plans to live stream for a few hours today. And despite your best efforts, an uncontrollable fit of coughing wracks your body, sending a sharp pain shooting up to your head again. You groan out in pain, unable to ignore the discomfort.  

Arthur was in his office in the midst of a live stream, chatting away with his viewers when he heard you from the living room. Pausing the game he was playing, he swiftly excuses himself from the stream, taking off his headset and exits the room.

You glance towards his office, the soft click of his door catching your attention. Upon spotting your red nose and sunken eyes, he doesn't hesitate for a moment, swiftly hurrying to your side. "Hey, darling, are you okay?" His voice is laced with genuine concern as he assesses your condition.

"I just had a bit of a headache, so my boss sent me home early," you shrug as you explain, trying to downplay the situation. "It's probably nothing, maybe just because it's cold and windy outside—" Your sentence is cut short by cough, prompting Arthur's concerned gaze. "Why didn't you tell me before you left for work?" he asks, furrowing his eyebrows. "How long have you been feeling like this?", his hands come to rest on your shoulders, rubbing them soothingly.

"You see, this is why," you remark, sounding slightly exasperated. "Weren’t you going to stream today?" Arthur immediately responds, "Don't worry about that, darling," he assures you, still just as worried.

"I'm fine, babe," you quickly reassure him, not wanting to worry him any further, knowing he'll drop everything to take care of you. "I'm feeling better now that I'm home. I'm actually gonna get some work done." But before you can continue, Arthur shakes his head adamantly. "No work, absolutely not. You need to rest," he insists firmly, his voice leaving no room for argument as he gently guides you towards the bedroom.

“But…I don’t want stuff to pile up”, you attempt to protest. But Arthur remains resolute, his gaze soft as he looks at you caringly. "There are others who can handle your work for now," he insists gently. "Right now, you need rest, medicine, and some tea." 

You look back at him with a small pout, hoping to sway him, "Off to bed you go," he says, as you two step into the bedroom.

"But Arthur," you begin, whining, but he cuts you off with a pointed look. "No, Y/N," he says, giving you a pointed look.

Finally, you concede, a sigh escaping your lips. "Fine, I'll sleep for an hour, but promise me you'll wake me up so I can finish up work." Arthur simply nods, accepting the small victory.

After changing out of your work clothes and into something more comfortable, you sit down on the bed "Just stay put, I'll get you the medicine," he says, but you attempt to get up from bed, insisting, "No, no, it's fine, Arthur, I'll get it myself." However, he gently pushes you back down. "No, I've got it,"

"But what about your stream?" you worry, but Arthur dismisses your concern with a laugh. "Just sleep, darling," he urges before leaving momentarily to fetch the medicine. Returning with water and the medicine, he hands them to you. "Here, take it," he instructs, watching as you comply before he helps you settle into bed.

"Do you need more pillows or a blanket?" Arthur asks, but you quickly decline, insisting that you're fine. "You just get back to your stream. Don't leave your viewers staring at an empty chair," you joke weakly. Arthur chuckles, "You just worry about getting better," before you interject, "It’s literally nothing, Arthur. I’ll be fine after a small nap. Just make sure you wake me up in an hour okay?" He responds with a sarcastic chuckle, “Yeah sure darling”, and you soon start to feel yourself getting drowsy. He brushes the hair out of your face, planting a gentle kiss on your forehead before quietly leaving the room.

Ignoring your request, Arthur allows you to sleep for as long as you need to, making sure to check up on you every 15 minutes or so. If he hears even a peep from the bedroom, he excuses himself from his stream to ensure you're okay or to make sure you've taken your medicine, sitting beside you until you drift back to sleep.

After another 30 minutes or so, Arthur decides to end his stream early, apologizing to his viewers before quietly slipping back into the bedroom to check on you. He walks up to you and sits beside your sleeping form, noticing a thin sheen of sweat on your forehead. Gently grabbing a towel, he wipes it, causing you to slowly wake up. "Sorry, sorry, go back to sleep," he quickly apologizes, feeling slightly guilty for waking you. However, you decide to sit up in bed, “No it’s fine,” you say, giving him a small smile.

He smiles softly and leans in to kiss you on the forehead, gently rubbing the sleep marks on your face. "How are you feeling?" he asks.

"Better," you reply with a slight smile. "My head doesn’t hurt as much." Leaning to grab a tissue, you blow your nose before asking, "What time is it?"

"It's around 7 pm," Arthur responds gently. "You've been asleep for about 3 hours."

"You told me you’d wake me up," you start to say, your tone slightly whining.

"Yeah, but you are really sick," Arthur interjects gently. "You don't need more work, you need to rest."

"But—", you begin to speak, but then you cough, a sharp pain shooting to your head. You look at him sheepishly as you groan, finally accepting, "Yeah, fine. I’m sick."

Arthur nods understandingly as he laughs at your admission. "I'll be right back, let me get you some tea," he says, getting up before quietly leaving the room.

He comes back after a few minutes, finding you sitting with your eyes closed, leaning against the headboard. As he walks in with the tea and more medicine, setting them down on the nightstand, he sits on the bed next to you, causing the mattress to dip slightly and the movement wakes you up.

"Hey, I’ve got your tea," he says softly, offering you the cup. "It'll help with your throat."

You pick it up and take a sip, feeling the warmth trickle down your throat, soothing the ache.

You look at him with a small smile, "Thank you, baby."

Arthur smiles warmly, replying, "Anything for you, love. You know I always wanna take care of you."

"I love you," you say softly, placing your palm on his hand that was resting on the mattress.

"I love you too, more than anything," Arthur responds, his eyes filled with affection.

His hand comes up to gently rub your cheek. As he leans in for a kiss on the lips, your hand comes up to cover his mouth, saying, "No, you'll get sick too. And then I’ll have to take care of you, and you’re the clingy type when you’re sick."

He feigns hurt for a moment before bursting into laughter. "Okay, okay, forehead kisses only," he agrees, planting a gentle kiss on your forehead, eliciting a smile from you as he leans and places a kiss on your forehead.

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Check out my other fics and oneshots here. Not working on any new requests currently but feel free to drop into my asks for a chat! 😊

[countfagula]

In a flare and watching stranger things so here’s a Steve headcannon:

Steve suffers with chronic pain after everything not just migraines but bone deep pain that just nags at him until either Robin or Eddie convince him to at least try out a mobility aid and of course he’s hesitant at first. He’s so used to being the big strong protector of the group and he feels like the aid is a sign of weakness but after much convincing (and nagging on Robins part) he finally gets a cane and it changes his view completely. He’s actually able to move without too much pain,he able to keep up with the kids again something he’s been struggling with since Vecna and most importantly he has freedom again. Honestly I just need Steve with a mobility aid <3

[boothillssugarmomma]

Hello hello!

Can I request a Dr. Ratio x reader that's a team leader and they're assigned to work together, and while he's complaining (whining) about her team they're not having it and they bicker (divorced parents vibes fr) (they're both in denial of their feelings). Just Ratio not being used to someone else talking back to him (pls make them make out thank you for your time regardless, I love your writing!

THIS IDEA GAVE ME SO MUCH BUTTERFLIES MAKING 😭 I hope you like it as much as I did creating it!

🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀

Sparks of Synergy

(Ratio x Fem!Reader)

cw-: mean!ratio, insults of intelligence, heavily suggestive, smidge of nudity mentioned

🎀 authorsnote: this is my first request fic and I literally screamed and giggled when I saw it!

please don't steal my work!

Taglist🎀HSR Master List🎀Other Lists🎀

"This part of this project is so simple! How do you not understand!? We've already been through this part multiple times!" Ratio could already feel an argument or a migraine coming. All it took was one glance down at your paper for him to practically combust.

"Fix this." He orders. He's spent hours going back and forth with you, hovering over your shoulder like a vulture.

He could spot all sorts of microscopic mistakes that he just was practically begging to point out. He doesn't exactly know why he even bothers. It's obvious that you were hopeless the moment you were recruited for his team.

Though, he suppose it's better for your dimwitted self and the rest of your team to come to him instead of doing it yourselves.

Aeons, he wouldn't be able to take in the sight of you doing this project alone and failing or asking for help from another bumbling, no-nothing dumbass.

The doctor is the best chance you've got with actually completing correctly, whatever it is you need help with...and he wouldn't have it...Any. Other. Way.

"Just because you're the team leader of this little project doesn't mean you can be so bossy." You hum and keep working.

"Bossy? Me?" Ratio lets out a scoff. That's rich coming from you.

He raises an incredulous eyebrow as his stare narrows at your ridiculous comment. Does this fool have the guts to insult him?

He rolls his eyes at the fact that you had the audacity to claim that he's "bossy" when he's simply trying to keep things together. He's not bossy, he has a title to live up to, unlike the likes of you.

"Yes...bossy..." Your eyes glance over at his in a glare. "You want to make the team quit?" You scoff.

"Please." Ratio shoots a condescending glance your way, leaning back against a wall and crossing his arms.

"If they aren't capable enough to handle my expectations and methods, then it's best for them to leave. I'm doing them a favor here. You should be thanking me, quite honestly. I am your team leader after all. I know what's best for this group."

He smirks. You should be grateful that he even allowed you to be a part of this team at all.

as you continue to bicker and fight the whole day the rest of the team just watches on in silence, until one by one they all start to leave

Eventually you both notice that you two are the only one in the room. Ratio let out an exasperated scoff and pinches the bridge of his nose. The headache coming back.

"Look at what you've done now." He snaps, his gold eyes snapping back to you once more. "You and your incessant nagging caused the others to leave. What a surprise."

The sarcasm was evident in his voice. He can't stand this.

"Oh you're going to blame this on ME!?" You scoff and fold your arms. "If anything it was your snide comments..."

Ratio let's out a sharp laugh, scoffing once again and turning his chin in a prideful way.

"What snide comments? The only thing I said was criticism that would help you improve on your work. You, just like the rest of those dimwits, can't seem to understand. Do you have any idea of the standards I live up to?"

"It's the way you say it Veritas." You sigh and rub your forehead with your index and thumb.

The purple haired smart ass stiffens. His golden gaze locked onto your exasperated expression. How irritating. How annoying. It was like a buzzing insect flying near his ear, one he longed to swat at.

"Perhaps try working harder instead of being so sensitive, idiot..." He scoffs. He was simply offering constructive criticism. It's not his fault that your little self couldn't take it.

"Ok you see!" You groan and push off the table. "That's what they don't like!"

Ratio scowls slightly. The audacity of you was absolutely ridiculous. He steps closer.

"What, do you propose I use a more 'soft' approach? Perhaps a 'softer' tone?" *He mocks, a sarcastic smile stretching his features. Soft? That's laughable. He doesn't do soft.

"You're just like them. Soft and sensitive. I have no tolerance for useless emotions. Only facts."

"Maybe you'd have more friends if you were nicer!" You raise your voice and clap your hands together before taking a breath.

Ratio laughs lowly, mocking your outburst. You had no right to judge him like that.

"How childish. If they truly were my friend, they'd stand by my honest and factual criticism. You see it as 'mean'. I do not. What is so wrong with telling it how it is?

I don't expect you to understand. Your feeble brain simply wouldn't be able to comprehend the standards."

"Ratio not everyone appreciates your random analysis of them." You scoff.

The doctor gives you a condescending side-glance, rolling his eyes. Random analysis? Surely you were aware that everything he thought of was correct?

"The facts are just the facts. People can either be offended by it or be mature and understand. Clearly, maturity is not a word you know."

"You seem sensitive and weak minded...GET OUT!" You mock him and throw a piece of chalk at the chalkboard before folding your arms.

It takes all of Ratio's self-restraint to not burst out into a hysterical, mocking laughter. His face twists into a sneer. You were the delusional and insensitive one here.

It's not long before Dr. Ratio had pushed you back until you were pinned against the wall his body pressed so close to yours that you could feel his soft, warm breath hitting the side of your neck.

"Weak minded?" He chuckles lowly.

"I would never dream of being weak. Ever."

You both just gaze in each other's eyes for what seems like an eternity before you clear your throat. "We should probably...get back to work..."

Dr. Ratio had almost forgot he was pinning you to the wall, but at the comment, it had made him pull back away slightly. He stares for a few seconds before glancing away and scoffing once more.

"Right, there's no time to waste on worthless chatter. I suppose it's up to me to be the bigger man once again and carry this team." He crosses his arms.

You roll your eyes as you walk back over to the table and start working.

After a small while there is no talking or bickering...until you did a slight mishap on an equation

He often glanced over quietly to make sure the work you were doing was correct. There were a few moments where he had to glance away from how badly your mistakes had irked him. He took in a breath to calm himself down.

He would be lying if he said that the silence wasn't slightly refreshing. But...he's quickly pulled out of that mindset when you made a mistake.

He lets out an irritated sigh and stands.

"Really? Another mistake? At this rate you might as well give me the paper for me to finish it myself."

"Don't touch it!" You rip the paper away from his hands.

He scoffed, his eyes narrowing as a sneer stretches on his lips. He takes another step closer to you, crossing his arms.

"Care to repeat that, idiot? You dare to talk back to me?" Ratio's gaze darkened slightly, his golden eyes practically gleaming in the light.

"Oh don't act like you're all high and mighty!" You stalk towards him poking his chest with your finger. "You're not the big bad Ratio everyone says you are!"

The doctor lets out a mocking scoff, his gaze locked onto you in a cold glare. He swats your little finger away like it was nothing.

"Big bad Ratio? You clearly are more ridiculous than I had originally anticipated. What, are you scared of me? Do my words... frighten you?" He steps even closer into your personal space, his voice dropping into a low growl.

Your heart flutters as your eyes lock again. His gold gaze holding yours so perfectly. But your stance never falters.

Ratio's eyes narrow as he can feel his irritation rising once again. Why is this bothersome woman making his heart beat like this?

He scoffs.

"You're getting too comfortable around me. Have I not made it obvious that I'm superior than you in every way?" He grabs your chin with his thumb and index, angling your face up.

"Superior? Superior!?" You scoff and laugh.

Ratio sneers, practically looming over you.

"Do you want me to list down everything that makes me superior to you, little one? The list would go on for miles and miles."

He stares down at you with an intimidating smirk, his thumb pressing against your chin almost possessively.

You glance down at his lips before locking eyes again. "Shut it...doctor..."

Ratio smirks once more, a dark chuckle escaping his lips. His thumb traces your bottom lip slightly, admiring your features for a brief second before he lets out another scoff.

"You have the audacity to tell me that? Oh, you are a fool. A very adorable fool...now you should shut it."

"Shut. It. Or. I'll. Make. You." You whisper darkly.

Ratio's smirk widens for a moment, clearly amused and slightly caught off guard by your boldness. He lets out another scoff and leans down close to your ear, his hot breath brushing against your skin.

"And. How. Precisely. do you propose yourself to accomplish such a thing, hm?" He murmurs, a mocking but low chuckle falling from his lips.

You lean up and cut him off with a kiss. A soft one before pulling away slightly. You both gaze into each other's eyes.

Ratio's golden eyes widened slightly in surprise, not anticipating such a move. You...kissed him? How dare you act so brazenly? Yet...why did he like it...?

He lets the surprise linger in his expression for a few more seconds before he takes quick action. Ratio closes whatever space was in between you and pushes you back against the wall, his lips pressing against yours in a passionate and possessive kiss.

As the kiss grows to be more passionate small sounds can be heard escaping both of your throats as you entangle closer together

Ratio's hand wraps around your waist tightly, his other hand slipping into your hair to keep you closer against him. Your soft lips were so addicting, it made his heart flutter strangely in his chest. His tongue darted out to slide against your bottom lip, begging for entrance into your mouth.

You open your mouth just enough for his tongue to slide inside, and you begin to fight for dominance.

His tongue immediately sought for yours, exploring the inside of your mouth as a low groan escaped his throat. He began to press you more and more into the wall, his body pressing tightly onto yours with an iron grip on your waist.

He pulls you away from the wall to lay you on the table as he continues to kiss you

Ratio's hand traveled down to grab your thigh and hoist it up so your calf wraps around his waist as he deepened the kiss with a small hum, his body hovered over yours in an almost possessive manner. His long, slender fingers would slowly begin to slip under your shirt.

"MhM!" You groan into his mouth as he slides a hand over your breast.

Ratio let's out a low chuckle as he slowly begins to slide your shirt off, wanting to feel more and more of your skin against his. He began to trail small, light kisses down your neck, gently sucking on a particularly sensitive spot.

"V-Veritas" You whisper softly in his ear.

Ratio gives one final, rough suck onto that particular spot on the side of your neck, creating a small bruise. He pulled back slightly to look down at you. A low chuckle escaped his lips once more as he leaned in to brush his hot breath against your ear.

"Saying my name so nicely...You're almost making me want to ruin you."

You roll your eyes softly and laugh quietly.

"So doctor how long have you been hiding these feelings for me?" You tease as you kiss his cheek.

Ratio let's out a scoff, his face quickly flushing a dark red at your boldness. He was getting teased by you of all people. He doesn't remember the last time anyone has gotten the best of him in such a way.

He clears his throat and leans down to press a bruising kiss upon your jaw, beginning to trail his lips across your neck.

"...for a while..." He reluctantly answers.

"And is this your mhM way of asking me out?" You smirk through a small moan and tilt his chin up with your hand to meet your gaze.

Ratio's face flushed a dark shade of red at your question, his eyes narrowing as he let out a scoff. He was the Veritas Ratio. You have some nerve to tease him.

It takes him an embarrassingly long time to answer, his brain scrambled. He can feel your soft hand on his chin, gently making him meet your gaze.

"...I suppose so." He finally admits sheepishly.

"Does this mean you're going to be nicer to me?" You lean forward to kiss his forehead.

The doctors golden eyes widened slightly at the small kiss on his forehead, his face flushing a deeper shade of red. He didn't expect you to get this affectionate with him. He glanced off to the side with a scoff.

"I-I already am nice to you. I'm...simply just more blunt than other people." He mumbled almost defensively.

You both pause as you throw your head back to laugh. "You're very funny doctor!"

His eyebrows furrow slightly in annoyance. You...laughed at him. He would have reprimanded you if it wasn't for the fact that your laughter was incredibly cute. He would huff in irritation, crossing his arms.

"It's not nice to laugh at me, you know..." He grumbles with a slight pout.

"Fine fine... I'm sorry~" you lean forward to whisper in his ear.

Ratio's face flushed an even darker shade of red as your soft whisper sent a shiver down his spine. His hands gripped slightly onto your hips, holding you against him firmly. He let out a sigh at your teasing words.

"...you're insufferable...I hate how adorable you are." He mumbled lowly, his voice dropping a degree as he stared down at you.

As he lifts you off the table and puts you back on the ground you smile softly "Yeah but you like meee~" You poke his chest softly.

Ratio quietly scoffs again, although his face was still flushed a dark shade of red. Why, you...! You had him wrapped around your finger. His eyes narrowed, yet the corner of his lip twitched into a smirk.

His arm loosely looped around your waist and bring you close to him, letting out a low chuckle as he rested his chin on top of your head.

"Shut up...you are so fuckin...insufferable." He mumbled lowly, not denying anything you said.

You press a kiss to his throat and smile. "Shall we get back to work...my love?"

A shiver raced down Ratio's spine at the small kiss, his eyes widening slightly in surprise. His heart thumped in his chest, the soft fluttering feeling in his chest only growing. No, not during work hours. He must not get distracted until the work is done.

He gave a firm nod, his golden eyes locking onto your gaze.

"...Yes, my dear..."

As he turns to the table you smirk. "Oh and Veritas?" You smile innocently as he turns back to you.

"After work..." You slide a hand up his chest until it rests on his heart. "I want you to show me just how insufferable I. Really. Am."

Ratio's eyes widen slightly before they narrow into a smirk, catching onto your words almost instantly. He raised an eyebrow as he watched you.

"A challenge? You seem so confident, my idiot..." He murmured. He grabbed the hand on his chest and brought it to his lips, placing a kiss to the palm of your hand.

He leaned close once more, and with a seductive whisper, and smirk, answered.

"You're on."

🎀End🎀

[trippinsorrows]

looking through your eyes + seven

authors notes: so this one leaves probably more questions than answers, but there's also a lot of things sprinkled throughout, and all questions will be answered....eventually.

if any cw/tw’s are missed, please let me know, and i will add them!

cw/tw: fluff, language, discussion of parental loss, brief (two line) flashback of aftermatch following csa, suggestive themes, ptsd trigger

song inspo: ‘looking through your eyes’ by leann rimes

masterlist

words: 8k

Solana: Are you busy today?

Normally, Roman would keep his phone face down during business meetings but with increasing communication with Solana, he’s leaned more on the side of having it face up so he’s aware when notifications come through. 

It’s not a priority. Just a…..preference. 

Grabbing his phone, he quickly shoots her back a text.

Roman: What do you need?

Before he can put his phone back down, those three dots appear. He keeps the thread open for her reply to slide in.

Solana: Nvm. I’m sorry to bother you.

Roman curses inwardly, barely keeping it to himself and not making the room of men aware of his frustrations. He can acknowledge Solana has slightly improved with her over–apologizing over the past couple weeks, but it’s moments like this that get him upset all over again. 

He fucking hates repeating himself.

But….

There’s that small, annoying ass, nagging voice in the back of his head that reminds him of why she’s always so apologetic, why she thinks her damn existence itself is an inconvenience. And he can’t really fault her, blame her for years of trauma fucking with her mental.

Roman: You’re apologizing again. How many times I gotta tell you to stop that shit?

It could probably, definitely, be worded better. Maybe even a bit…kinder. But Roman is a lot of things. 

Kind is not one of them.

He then adds, knowing she’ll probably try to find another excuse to not be honest with him. 

Roman: What do you need? The truth, Solana. 

There’s an appearance and disappearance of those dots at least three or four times. He can picture her biting down on her bottom lip as she tries to word what probably is a simple request as best she can.

The amount of overthinking she does has to be fucking exhausting.

Solana: I was just gonna see if you could meet me at the library. I wanted to show you something.

Solana: But, it’s not a big deal! Please forget I said anything.

A couple of things strike Roman strange, two in particular. The first being that as soon as she says what she needs, the answer is an automatic yes. Like, it’s not even something he really thinks too much about, but he also chalks it up to a level of genuine curiosity. This might be the first time she’s actually directly asked him for something.

It must be important. Important enough for her to ask him to come see whatever it is, at least.

It’s why he doesn’t even comment on her second, follow up text.

Roman: What time you get off?

He can make whatever work.

Solana: It’s okay. Really.

This damn girl….

Roman’s jaw clench as he types out a text that matches his mood. 

Roman: Solana….

She’s giving him a damn migraine. He’s not sure why he doesn’t just ignore her at this point. If it’s that fucking important, she wouldn’t be giving him such a hard time.

But then the stupid nagging voice returns, reminding him that her even asking in the first place is a huge deal that shouldn’t necessarily be shot down because of lingering struggles that are probably going to be around for a while.

Solana literally has years of baggage and trauma she needs to heal from.

And that shit doesn’t happen overnight.

Solana: 3pm

Roman blows out a breath. Fucking finally. 

He lays his phone back down, not necessarily wanting to hear any pushback or counter arguments she might try to supply, fake ass reasons she wants to back away from her assertive request. 

Not happening. 

Roman: I’ll be there.

“Jey.” Roman’s deep voice cuts through the group who set their eyes on him. “I need you and Jimmy to handle the Barrett meeting for me.”  While the twins are annoying as shit majority of the time, they’re effective all of the time. Roman has trusted countless meetings with them, and none have turned out badly. They always get shit handled. 

His cousins both echo okayness with this change in plans, as expected. The same way Roman expected his Wise Man to be the one with questions.

“My Tribal Chief, we’ve had this meeting scheduled for weeks. What could possibly be more important?”

It’s a fair question, Roman isn’t too stubborn to admit that. But, it’s also not a question that applies. Again, it’s not that Solana is important, per se, it’s just that if his alternative is dealing with Barret’s loquacious business dealings, he’d prefer Solana.

He’s also partially intrigued by the mere fact she’d even had the balls to ask something of him in the first place. It’s promising. Assertiveness has always been more attractive to him than passiveness. 

Roman’s answer is both simple and vague. “I have somewhere to be.”

“But—”

“Wise Man.”

Paul’s childlike smile deepens suddenly, as if he’s been picked to be fucking line leader. “Yes, my Tribal Chief?”

“Who’s the Tribal Chief?”

Rikishi is the only one to offer a visible reaction, hiding his chuckle. He knows exactly where this is going, even if his decades old friend does not. 

“Y–you are, my Tribal Chief.”

Romans voice is sharp and lethal. “So why the fuck are you asking me to answer to you?”

Paul’s expression pales. “I would never, my—”

“Sound like it to me,” Jimmy’s messy ass chimes in. He looks at Jey. “What you think, Uce?”

“Sound like it to me too.” Jey, as expected, agrees. Only for him to nearly fall back in his seat when he jumps up so both feet are on the expensive ass leather. Roman is annoyed all over again for a new reason. “Ayo, Uce, ya’ll got a rat problem!”

At that, Jimmy is twinning with his brother in more than just appearance, also with his feet off the floor and onto the leather chair. Roman hopes they both fall over and break their goddamn necks. Rikishi can handle Barrett just fine.

“Ain’t you like a goddamn billionaire? How the hell you got Stuart Little and his fam running around your crib!”

Roman’s gaze follows the line of vision the twins are so damn focused on only to be met with Dulce calmly walking past both of them to sit in front of him, looking up with a tilted head. 

She’s clearly looking for Solana. 

And he knows this because it’s become a bit of a habit. If he’s home and she’s not, Dulce’s nosy ass seems to seek him out as if he’s supposed to magically make her owner appear. It’s not something he’s brought up to Solana, because he knows she would just freak the fuck out and over apologize for Dulce “bothering” him. 

And that’s not the case. 

It’s a bit annoying, but it’s not a bother.

His staff keep an eye out for her when Solana works, and he’s even seen Solana come back to the house on her lunch breaks to check in Dulce, so he doesn’t mind. She’s keeping up her end of the deal, being the primary caretaker for the puppy. 

“That’s Solana’s dog.”

Jimmy’s bewildered gaze is on him. “This a dog?”

“Yes.”

“You let her get a dog? Like a real ass dog?”

“You fucking see her, don’t you?” At that moment, Dulce calmly lays down on the floor next to Roman’s feet which are literally bigger than her small ass. It’s followed up by Paul starting to sneeze. 

Jey, who is now sitting back in his chair like a normal human being, points out, “man, you hate dogs.”

Naturally, Roman goes a bit on the defense, shoulders straightening. “I don’t hate them.”

Jimmy makes a sound, also with his feet planted on the ground. “Bruh, you literally use to tell us when we was growing up, ‘I hate dogs.’ That’s why we started calling you Big Dog, cause it was funny to see you get all mad and shit.”

Roman may or may not remember that, but it doesn’t mean he’s going to acknowledge it. Besides, he’s allowed to change his mind. Hate was always probably too strong of a word to use anyway. 

There are a lot of things Roman hates, even more people that he hates, but dogs are not on the list. 

It was more irritation than anything.

“Whatever.”

“What’s her name?” Rikishi asks, bending over his chair to try to catch Dulce’s attention.

Roman watches the puppy gradually make her way over his cousin, ears dropping as he gently rubs the top of her head. “Dulce.”

“Dul–what?”

This…..this is why Roman is on high blood pressure medication, why Dr. Michaels recommended he start wearing one of those smart watches to monitor his heart rate and other shit. Not that he did it.

“Dulce. It’s Spanish.”

“Aw man, why you ain’t say that in the beginning?” Jimmy turns to Jey. “The dog only speak Spanish.” He looks over at his dad who now has Dulce in his lap, continuing to pet her. Roman rolls his eyes. This dog is a damn attention whore, just like he predicted. “Hola, lil’ chalupa.”

Jey punches his brother on the arm. “Uce, you can’t be saying that kind of shit. It’s racist.”

“No, it’d be racist if I called the dog Taco Bell since her mama half Mexican, but I ain’t do that shit, cause I like Soso.”

“Stop calling her that.” 

Jimmy avoids Roman’s warning and proceeds to ask with all of the intrigue. “So not only did you let her bring a dog up in here, but you let ole’ girl pick a rat for said dog?”

Already irritated and on edge, Roman isn’t sure why Jimmy’s question irritates him as much as it does, and not even because it's a question that’s being posed when he’s trying to review a contract. It’s that Jimmy is questioning Solana’s decision in general.

He answers as calmly as he’s capable of responding. Roman also notices that Paul is red as a tomato as he pulls out an Epipen. Roman easily brings his focus back to Jimmy. “It’s what she wanted.”

“Should have got a big dog,” Jey suggests, hovering over by Rikishi as he tries to interact with Dulce whose eyes are fluttering closed. Roman swears this damn dog sleeps 23 out of the 24 hours in the day. 

That answer is simple, Roman grabbing a pen to sign off on the contract in front of him. It’s satisfactory enough. “She’s scared of them.”

“What is she not scared of?”

But that comment, for whatever reason, is what makes him snap. “Get out.”

Both the twins are unfazed, but it seems to trigger something for them as Jimmy exclaims, “I forgot!” He looks over at Jey, reminding. “Remember, Soso made some extra food for us.”

“Oh shit, she sho’ did!” 

Roman makes a mental note to write Solana about that. It’s not her job to keep feeding his grown ass, married ass cousins. 

The two bid their farewell, Jey shouting out as his parting term, “yeet!”

“Stop doing that,” Roman calls after their retreating forms as Paul also excuses himself for some air. 

Maybe he really is allergic to dogs. 

Rikishi stands up and walks over to him, still holding Dulce but not saying anything. He’s just looking like he wants to say something. Another of Roman’s pet peeves, of the many.

With a mutter and scowl, he asks, “what?” 

His cousin simply shrugs, nonchalantly commenting. “The girl is growing on you, Uce.” It’s an assessment, for certain.

However, Roman has zero desire to have this conversation with his older cousin, or anyone, in general. Hence, his vague ass reply of, “she’s tolerable.”

Because that’s the truth. Solana is neither amazing nor insufferable. She’s in a pretty balanced space between the both: tolerable.

Rikishi gives him that sly ass look that makes Roman want to punch him in his fucking face. “E tua le fale tele i le faleo’ o.”

It’s an old Samoan proverb that means “Even the mighty need others.”

Instantly, Roman’s gaze is cutting. “I don’t need anyone.” He never has, and he never will.

Rikishi just offers a knowing smile, lowering Dulce back to the ground and placing a hand on Roman’s shoulder, giving a gentle squeeze. “Of course not, Uce. Of course not.” The older man says nothing else, just walking out, Dulce returning back to stand by Roman’s feet, head up, staring at him.

He rolls his eyes, murmuring as he gets back to work. “She’ll be home later.” 

Dulce barks in response. 

________

The minute Roman pulls up to Solana’s job, sees the expression on his cousin’s face, he knows something is up.

Solo may have a dangerously good poker face, but Roman invented that shit. 

He got the blueprint from Roman. 

Solana is sitting near the front of the building, surrounded by fucking children as she reads some basic ass book that they’re all clearly eating up based upon how they can’t seem to take their eyes off her.

Roman isn’t entirely indifferent, instantly taking note of her outfit, more colorful, less covered. It reeks of Naomi’s influence, but in a good way. 

As always, she looks good, better than good.

Not wanting to interrupt, Roman motions for a few of his men to take Solo’s place as he gestures for his younger cousin to follow him.

As soon as they’re outside the building, Roman gets right into it. “You got something to say, so say it.” 

Roman knows his cousin well enough to know that despite his brutal fighting abilities, the man is always careful and meticulous with his words. Unlike his hot headed older brother, Jey, Solo always thinks before he acts.

It’s why Roman doesn’t think twice about the space between the issuance of his prompt and Solo’s answer.

“You made me your enforcer for a reason, yeah?”

It’s an easy answer. “Yes.” 

“You upped me in the ranks to prove myself, right? To earn my way into the inner circle?”

Roman is already bored with the conversation, but considering this is family, he throws a bone. “Yeah.”

“So just how am I supposed to do that when you got me playing babysitter to your new wife?” The turn in topics as well as increase in Solo’s volume does slightly, very slightly, take Roman by surprise. Granted, he does a masterful job, as always, hiding that surprise. “Any lower guy could do this shit. She don’t—”

“Solo.” Roman gives him that tight smile and scratches his beard, typically the last thing people see before they meet their maker. “You answer to me. You do what I say you do, and I say you’re assigned to Solana.”

Roman doesn’t know what’s in the fucking water for people to be testing him the way they are, but it’s really starting to piss him off.

Solo looks down, clearly embarrassed by this talk down but not enough to shut his mouth. “I get that, but—”

“Wasn’t she already hurt once under your watch?” Roman’s voice is razor sharp as he reminds the younger man of his failure. The memory of that fucking bruise on Solana’s wrist from her bitch of a brother returning all of those strong emotions. “I gave you a job, and you didn’t do it. She got hurt while under your protection. It’s because you’re my cousin, you're even still breathing right now. You know better than anyone I don’t accept failure.”

At that, Solo concedes, knowing good and well there is no excuse or justifiable reason. “I understand, my Tribal Chief.”

Roman does his best to chip away some of his anger at this outright disrespect as well as the memories of Solana hurt. He steps past his cousin, calling out over his shoulder. “And Solo, don’t think because you’re family I won’t put a bullet in your head for questioning me.” Out of the corner of his eye, Roman can see Solo still has his head down. “Fail me again, let her get hurt again, and I’ll put your ass six feet under.”

Roman doesn’t allow the conversation to persist beyond that, big steps taking him back to the library just in time to see the children disperse, whipping past him as Solana approaches. The wedges on her feet give her a bit more height, but he still towers over her, which is a usual experience for him.

But, it doesn’t negate the fact that she’s so damn small.

“Hi,” she greets in that familiar unsure voice, eyes darting from him to the ground. “Sorry—I mean—story time ran a bit over.”

He’s appreciative she at least caught the apologizing before he had to call it out. “It’s fine.”

She offers a tight smile and motions for him to follow her, which he does, just as his eyes follow the sway of her ass as she leads the way.  

He’s starting to really enjoy seeing her in jeans. 

She leads him up the stairs and in the back area he’d visited her before what seems like so long ago, finding that her bastard of a brother had manipulated her into being alone with him. The last fucking time that shit will ever happen.

She pulls a key out her back pocket and unlocks the door, informing, “I have to grab something first.”

He doesn’t say anything, just nods. It’s like she feels the need to justify every little thing she does. 

Roman watches her walk over to the desk, leaning over as she grabs him something out of her bag, a notebook, the journal he first found her writing in the first time he came to see her at her place of employment. 

She’s back by him, closing and locking the door. “Come on.”

Typically, if this was anyone else, Roman would have demanded to know just what the fuck was so important that caused him to have to rearrange his whole schedule. Granted, he can’t take that out on her, nor would he ever, when he’s the one who rearranged his whole schedule for her. She didn't ask him to do that shit. 

He did it on his own volition for reasons unknown. 

The walk to the next stop doesn’t take long at all, Solana soon sticks her key in another, unfamiliar door, opening and stepping aside but directing him to walk in.

He does as such, naturally and instantly taking in his surroundings once she hits the light switch. It’s a room obviously, a previous storage room he would guess based upon the large filing cabinet lined against the wall to the right of him. There’s also another couple pieces of furniture against that same wall, like a desk and mini bookshelf, but that’s not what immediately catches his attention.

He’s instead more interested by the remaining walls that are essentially lined with larger, white bookshelves, all filled with a combination of notebooks, books, and journals. Completely filled. 

Intrigued but also confused, the latter of which is unfamiliar to him, Roman turns to Solana, asking, “what is this?”

Her cheeks redden, but she manages an answer that’s somehow not marked by as much stuttering. “There are all my journals—well,” she stops, giving a nervous laugh. “Most of them. Some are books I’ve read, and….” She walks over to a section that somehow seems different from the others, albeit lined up neatly with the rest of the items. Solana’s hand almost hesitantly feathers over the spines of the journals. At closer look, Roman can see they’re a bit dated and worn than the others. “These were my mother’s.”

Her answer surprises him, but he quickly recalls her sharing that she started writing because of her mother, because they wrote to each other.

She clears her throat and then turns back to him, sharing, “every time I finish a journal, I leave it here.”

Obviously. “Why here?”

“My mom started it. It—it was an arrangement she had with Mrs. Jensen. She worked here, and along with her pay, she arranged so she could keep her writings here and after….” Solana starts to hesitate, and Roman can see it’s because emotion is brewing. Just gently bubbling under the surface. “After she died, I kept up with it.”

Roman recognizes the sensitive nature of the subject and makes a subtle effort to change the topic on her behalf. “You’ve really written in all of these?” It’s impressive. He has to give her that. The thought of writing in general has never appealed to him, so for her to have a room full of journals she’s completed is fucking impressive. 

She nods, adding sheepishly, “filled em’ up.” Solana then takes the one in her hand, lifting it a bit. “Finished this one this morning.” He watches her squeeze it into a row that’s probably already being pushed to the limit.

She’s going to run out of space eventually.

She’ll need something bigger, sooner rather than later. Roman compartmentalizes this for a later date and time to navigate.

“You keep em’ here to hide them also, don’t you?”

“They can never know what I’ve written….” She doesn’t need to say who they are. It’s more than obvious. It’d be a sure death wish. “I just—-I know you said you’d write for now and it’s been almost a month, but—but I—I figured if you knew just how important and helpful writing is to me—”

“Solana.” There’s no need for her long ass, drawn out explanation. He understands now why she wanted him to see this space, the goal behind the request. “We’ll write as long as you need it.”

He watches her shoulders drop, a sign of relief. She bites back a smile he wouldn’t be opposed at seeing. She looks even better when she’s smiling. “Thank you.”

He only nods, and Solana finds herself taking him in. 

All of him.

In recent weeks, she’s discovered yet another newfound difficulty and source of anxiety for herself. And that new addition would happen to be in the form of the 6’3 man before her.

Roman has always made her nervous, for a variety of good and valid reasons, but recently, the cause of that anxiety has shifted to something else, something a bit on the unfamiliar side for her, or rather something she hasn’t really had to think about since her last disastrous relationship.

Attraction

Solana has come to terms with the fact that she’s attracted to Roman, yes, but also that she hasn’t the slightest clue of what to do about and with that said attraction.

It’s always been there, to a certain extent, but it was more dormant, something she knew was present but voiceless and nameless, almost invisible.

Now, in interacting and engaging with him more, it’s formed more defining characteristics, creating a sense of butterflies in her stomach whenever his smoldering gaze falls on her or when he says something to her, that deep, baritone voice sprouting goosebumps on the back of her neck.

It also doesn’t help that he’s indicated a couple of different times now that he also finds her attractive, or pretty, beautiful even.

That he thinks she looks good.

None of that makes sense to Solana nor can she understand why he would believe any of those things, but she would never make him out to be a liar, so it must be true, to some extent.

And therein lies the dilemma. 

One of many that exist in her life.

How she’s supposed to balance attraction with fear, desire with aversion, peace with trauma. It’s all a muddled mess. 

“Solana.”

“Sorry.” He only has to sigh one time for her shoulders to sulk, but instead of apologizing, she points out in a small voice. “It’s—it’s a habit.”

“Yeah, well, it’s a fucking habit to break.” His irritation is palpable, and Solana feels even smaller around him, like she’s done something wrong. “It’s not you I’m annoyed with.”

“Oh.” And that genuinely surprises her. In Solana’s experience, she’s always been the source of people’s, especially the men in her life, exasperation. But before she can step out of her comfort zone and ask him what’s wrong, he informs her of something that completely makes her emotions flip and twirl into a puddle of distress.

“Your father called for you today.” And just like that, any sense of relation and ease she’d achieved is dissipated, replaced with growing unrest. “Relax…” It’s not missed upon Solana how Roman’s tone quickly and almost easily jumps from irritated to almost soothing, like he’s trying to calm his nerves. “I told him to fuck off.”

That doesn’t make her feel any better. “He doesn’t like being told no.”

“And you think I give a fuck?” His deep voice is full of indifference and edge, but this time around, Solana knows it’s not directed towards her. He then asks, “do you want to talk to him?”

It takes her off guard. “What?”

Roman repeats himself with a surprising lack of irritation. “Do you want to talk to him?” 

Solana can’t remember the last time she was asked such a question. Been given a choice. Then again, it’s happened quite a few times since her marriage to Roman, starting with Bayley asking her something as simple as how she wants her makeup done. 

She doesn’t know what to make of that. Just another thing added to that mounting list of confusing and conflicting thoughts and feelings. 

“If you want to, I’ll allow it.” He quickly adds the caveat. “But not without me present.”

Prior to the past couple weeks, Solana would suspect Roman’s stipulation stems from a place of possessiveness. But now….now it feels like it comes from someplace else, something so unfamiliar and foreign. 

Protectiveness. 

It feels like he’s being protective of her. 

His proclamation from earlier returns to the forefront of her mind.

“I’m not going to let anyone lay a fucking hand on you.”

He’d also included a list of people he wouldn’t allow to do as such, including her dad and brother, which is why he clearly would only let Solana speak to her father if he’s around. 

It’s just the why that has her stumped.

But, back to the question being posed, the easiest and most simple answer is no. She’d rather not be around someone who’s only ever left her hurt, emotionally and/or physically. Or allocated that task to her brother. 

Not to mention the fact that the only reason he probably wants to talk to her is to discuss this nefarious plot she still refuses to allow herself to think about because it’s so inconceivable. 

“Not really,” she answers after what feels like forever, “but…”

Roman picks up on her hesitation. “But?” 

“Like I said, my–my father doesn’t like being denied.” And before he can protest or again reiterate his outright indifference to her father’s feelings, Solana adds in a quiet voice, “and I usually end up being the one to pay for it.”

Roman steps towards her, and before she can process what’s happening, his finger is under her chin, tugging so that her head is lifted, eyes locked with his. 

His voice lowers, quietly asking, “you still don’t believe me when I say I won’t let anyone hurt you, huh?” It’s rhetorical, sure, but Solana is too focused on the fact that this man is touching her. It’s as innocent as innocent comes, but it’s still touch, something she usually hides away from like the plague. However, outside of the initial shock and borderline discomfort, Solana doesn’t jump away, doesn’t feel the need to put as much distance between them. She’s almost….almost comfortable.

“I’m going to kill them both, eventually.  Fucking with them in the meanwhile only makes the outcome that much more worthwhile. But…” And the surprises keep coming, especially as he makes her aware of his intentions. “One word. All I need is one fucking word from you. That you want them gone, and it’s done. No questions asked.” 

Power.

Solana wonders if this is what power feels like, the ability to say one single word and have a life be ended. How she feels about those lives belonging to her brother and father remains to be seen, but even being given such an option, such an almost promise, it’s an indescribable experience.

Roman’s brown eyes, light and contrasting everything about him that is sharp and hard, study her. “You understand me?”

Naturally, she nods against his index finger that’s under her chin, demanding maintained eye contact. 

“I need words.” It’s a reminder from the infamous wedding night, something that seems so far in the rearview mirror now. 

“Y–yes.”

He seems pleased by this acknowledgment, enough to pull his hand away from her, Solana trying not to make too much of the strange sensation that floats in her stomach at the absence of his touch. 

Roman suddenly offers. “If it makes you feel better, I’ll up your security detail.” Before she can protest and probably apologize if she’d unintentionally indicated it wasn’t already enough, he asks, “you get off at 3 every day?”

“Essentially, y–yes.” 

“I’ll start meeting you.”

The surprises just keep on coming.

Instantly, she feels bad, shaking her head. “You don’t have to—”

“Solana.” This man must get tired of having to say her name, she’s certain of that. “I’ll meet you.” He says the same thing, but this time, she knows not to push back because it’s a done thing. “Just make sure I have your updated work schedule.”

“Wh—what about Solo?”

“He’ll still be assigned to you for any other outings.” This makes her feel a little better, that he’s not entirely rearranging and inconveniencing himself for her. “You ready to go?”

Yes. No. Maybe. There’s so many different questions she has with only a select number of answers, but in this moment, she goes with the one that feels most right. 

Especially with Roman reaching for her hand.

Nodding, she swallows and accepts his gesture, noticing how his large hand closes over hers, almost protectively.

“Yes.”

________

“That for me?” Solana looks up from the notebook she’s almost certain she’ll have filled and completed by the end of the month. Roman’s presence and question both catch her off-guard. She didn’t really expect to speak to him again today, especially after he already spent time with her earlier that day. She figured he’d had his maximum daily dosage. 

Especially after she’d already prepared and fixed dinner for him, the two of them falling into their now routine of him eating in his office, her in the living room before she makes her way out back to the patio where she either writes or, now, plays with Dulce.

Solana shakes her head, answering softly as Roman sits on the chair opposite her.  “no. It’s…”

“About your mom?”

With him now aware of the nature of some of her writing, she answers, “yeah.” Roman’s question triggers something she’s certain she intentionally never commented on because it was such a shock to her system that she really didn’t know how to respond. “When….when you said it wasn’t my fault….did—did you mean that?”

If she expected there to be delayed response or even confusion on his end, she was entirely wrong because he answers almost on the spot. “Yes. I told you, I wouldn’t lie to you.”

She’s starting to believe that. 

Wetting her lips, she informs in that same small voice, “no one’s ever said that to me before.”

Xavier’s unshaven face and dark, judgmental gaze is focused on her, Solana doing her best to ignore the pain that wrecks her body, the beeping of the machines and IV’s in both her arms. The throbbing between her legs is equally scary as it is confusing. What did they do to her, and why did it hurt so much?

He pulls the cigar from his mouth, dropping and stomping it on the floor, gruff voice asking, “why didn’t you fight back?” He shakes his head, spitting at the same spot that’s littered with remnants of one of many poor habits. “You’re weak just like your mother.”

Roman’s firm voice snatches her away from spiraling too deeply in dark memories of an even darker past. She does her best to shake away any sign she was about to dissociate when he surprises her for what feels like the 10th time today, almost quietly sharing, “My mother was killed when I was ten years old.” There’s a synchronous dropping of her mouth and stomach at the exact same time. “You think that shit was my fault?”

The answer is obvious and immediate. “No. Of–of course not. You were—you were just a kid.”

While her response is borderline automatic, coming from a place of pure logic, everything else is so confusing. Roman’s mother is….dead? Not even dead but murdered when he was a child?

Just like hers.

Solana doesn’t know how to process this. It’s not until this very moment that she realizes not once has she ever considered or thought about his immediate family, like parents and even siblings. At the wedding, so many people were present, obvious family members of his, but she’s just now realizing she never considered who was who. Were they all cousins, aunts, in-laws even? 

Where is the rest of his immediate family? Better yet, who makes up his immediate family? She’s aware of the twins and even his older cousin Rikishi, but is there not more?

“So were you.” She can’t tell if Roman intentionally works to redirect the focus back onto herself or if he’s unaware of the fact she’s suddenly wondering just how much about the man across from her she still knows nothing about it. “So why is it different for you?”

It’s an effective diversion and valid question that she’s never once asked herself.

“No one’s ever said that either.” Her voice is only a couple octaves above a whisper, and Solana finds herself sharing more than she’s probably ever divulged to anyone. “When I….when I’m writing, a lot of the times, I’m writing letters to my mom.” Having this conversation with anyone, let alone Roman, of all people, wasn’t on her life agenda. But, it seems like a lot of ‘nevers’ are gradually morphing into ‘actualities.’

It’s such a strange experience, too.

“Like I said, we used to write to each other, and after….after she was killed, I couldn’t find it in me to stop. I think at the beginning, I kept doing it because….because I didn’t want to accept she was gone.” The understanding and underlying emotion shifts to the surface, resulting in her quickly wiping at her eyes to keep the tears from falling. “Like I was waiting for her to write me back.” It’s not missed upon Solana how Dulce suddenly moves closer, tucking her body right up against Solana’s thigh. “And I’ve kept at it over the years, cause—she was the only person I could ever talk to.”

Roman repeats the same message he wrote to her, almost reminding her of a lifeline she’s gradually starting to realize is available for the first time in almost twenty years. “You can talk to me, Solana.”

And she is. She doesn’t know how and especially why, but she is, and as heavy as the topic is, there’s a hint of relief at finally having another living, breathing person to speak to and with about these things. 

Especially…..especially someone who can maybe relate to her. “How did you do it—how did you….move past it?”

It’s not the best wording, she’s certain of that. Losing a parent. Having a parent be murdered isn’t something one gets over. 

Solana knows this better than most, but Roman….he’s so composed, so together, so unbroken. 

So unlike her. 

His expression darkens as he answers in an eerie but calm voice. “I got my revenge, and I killed every single son of a bitch who played a role.” His delivery unsettles her a bit, but he seems to easily shift back into that almost patient tone she’s only ever heard him use….with her. “But, I’m not like you, Solana. You're innocent. My ledger bleeds red.” Solana doesn’t know what it looks or even sounds like for Roman to be uncomfortable, but his delivery in the next part definitely feels as such.  “I don’t….feel things like you do. You feel everything. I feel nothing.”

She whispers. “I wish I was like that, that I didn’t feel.” Because it’s true. Because it’s how she initially started to self harm, because she wanted to feel something other than emotional pain. Even physical pain was better than the anguish that racked her every day, 24/7.

He’s quick to shut that down, to tell her the complete opposite. “No, you don’t. That would mean you’ve lost that innocence you have.”

That actually makes Solana smile, chuckle, but there’s not an ounce of humor as she shakes her head. “I–I lost my innocence a long time ago.” Stolen. It was stolen from her a long time ago is the more appropriate way to word it. Stomach a complete freaking mess, she does her best to power through her anxiety at what she’s about to tell him. “Roman…..I—”

“Ayo, Uce—”

“What!” Roman snaps, Solana jumping back away from him, hypervigilance back on high and alert. He briefly casts his gaze back in her direction, and she can almost swear she sees a speck of guilt. Like he’s apologetic for scaring her. 

Jimmy, however, is unfazed by his cousin’s temper. He’s lived with it his whole life. Ain’t nothing new. “Rhodes men were on Bloodline territory—”

“What?” At that, Roman’s head snaps back in Jimmy’s direction. And Solana watches as any sign of Roman, patient and almost kind, is replaced almost instantly with that same cold, stoic demeanor that could strike fear in the heart of even the strongest man. 

He stands up, hands on his hips as he moves a bit away from her. Solana also stands, fighting her urge to move closer to him. 

Jimmy also presents with a seriousness she’s never seen in him, never even really knew he was capable of, to be honest. “We got three guys down. Another two critically injured.”

Roman curses, turning away, back toward Jimmy and her. He then asks, “you got a location on em’ yet?”

“Pearce should have it any minute now.”

“Good. Let’s go.” Roman nods, stepping away from Solana and in the direction of Jimmy just as Dulce walks over, clearly wanting Solana to pick her up. She must also pick up on the sudden shift in the atmosphere. 

Dulce in her arms, Solana finds herself calling for Roman. “What—”

“Not now.” His dismissal is sharp and sudden. It shouldn’t hurt her feelings, because it’s obvious he’s in an entirely different zone now, but it does. 

Solana sinks back into her shell of silence as Solo steps forward. “You want me—”

“Stay with Solana. She doesn't step foot outside this fucking house, you understand me?” Roman’s orders are indisputable, an almost sense of urgency in his tone. “Heighten security around the premises.”

Solana has so many questions. Just what is going on? Why is Roman so on edge all of a sudden? Who is Rhodes and why do they present such an imminent threat where Roman marches out the house, Jimmy on his heels without even a second glance at her.

It’s all so confusing. 

“You need to get inside.” Solo’s equally stoic reminder, command maybe, pulls her from her thoughts. And Dulce suddenly growling at Solo definitely redirects her focus.

“Shhh. It’s just Solo,” she comforts, petting and trying to calm the puppy who quickly upgrades her growling to barking. This also confuses the mess out of Solana.  

She’s not sure she’s ever seen Dulce both growl and bark at someone.

Wordlessly, she walks in the house, past Solo who she notices makes sure to lock the door behind them. 

“Stay in your room," he instructs, and while she has more questions than anything, his austere tone is more than enough for her to not push back. 

Dulce will just have to use the crate if she has to use the bathroom. 

Without another word, Solo carries Dulce up the stairs and into her room where she lays the puppy in her bed and Solana climbs onto her.

Chewing on her bottom lip, she grabs her phone and opens up the latest group text thread she was messaging in. 

Solana: Can I ask you guys something?

Their replies come in not even five minutes later. 

Bayley: Of course!

Naomi: Anything.

Without allowing herself too much time to overthink it, Solana sends out the simple question.

Solana: Who or what is Rhodes?

Solana: Roman just rushed out of here after Jimmy said something about Rhodes men being on Bloodline territory. I’m not allowed to leave the mansion.

Just like the start of the conversation, the replies come in almost instantaneously. 

Naomi: Fuck.

Naomi: Yes, stay put. Solo’s there with you, right?

Solana: Yes.

Solana’s anxiety is only growing. Naomi sounds just as intense as Jimmy and Roman were. 

Her follow up text doesn’t do anything to help the confusion either.

Naomi: The less you know, the better. The guys will handle it.

Handle what, though? That’s what Solana really wants to know. What is the story here, and why did this Rhodes person or group have Roman so wired. 

Just then, another notification comes through. From Bayley, but in their individual thread and not the group chat. 

Solana switches over, reading her messages as they arrive almost back to back. 

Bayley: Rhodes is a person, but…that’s a complicated story.

Bayley: And I'd feel bad telling someone else’s story, but what I can tell you is that Rhodes is Cody Rhodes, head to the Nightmare Factory, the Bloodline’s biggest opp. Tensions have been at an all time high for like two generations with countless bodies dropped on both sides. It’s always a bloodbath when they’re in the same vicinity. 

Solana is regretting even asking anything in the first place. Bloodbath when they’re in the same vicinity, the same vicinity Roman is heading for as she types. Her shoulders drop, anxiety starting to shift to a new target. 

Concern for his safety.

Bayley: If you’re somehow ever in a situation where someone from the Nightmare territory is around, get the hell out of dodge. They won’t hesitate to kill you, especially with you being Roman’s wife.

Bayley: Or Rollins. Seth Rollins. Especially him. Guy is fuckin’ psycho.

Solana: Rollins?

Bayley: Roman, Seth, and Cody used to be friends a long time ago, like way long ago, and it just….it went bad. Really really fucking bad, and Cody and Roman have hated each other since. Like, I don’t know if hate is even a strong enough word for how much they can’t stand each other. 

Solana: But why?

Bayley never replies. 

________

Roman doesn’t step back into the house until almost 4am. He feels every bit exhausted as he probably looks, more physical than anything, some mental, maybe more than he’d like to admit.

Dealing with anything Nightmare related typically has that impact on him.

Solo meets him at the door, looking as on alert as he did when Roman first saw him at the ass crack of dawn this morning. 

The first thing to leave Roman’s mouth isn’t intentional as much as it is unintentional. “How was she?”

Solo motions to the marble flooring leading to the spacious living room. “She’s waiting for you.”

Roman wasn’t expecting to hear that, and he’s certain it shows in his facial expression. “What? Why? Why is she still up?”

Solo shrugs. “You’ll have to ask her. She don’t talk to me.” Which is more Solo’s preference anyway. It’s his job to protect her, not be her fucking friend. “Everything good?” Roman nods but doesn’t say anything, still stuck on the fact that Solana is still up. “Imma head out.”

Roman’s response is as distant as his expression. He doesn’t care whether Solo stays or leaves. “Alright.”

Once his enforcer is out the house, Roman sure enough finds Solana sitting on the sofa, legs crossed, notebook in her lap as she writes away.

“Solana.”

She gasps, clearly taken by surprise, but when her head lifts and her eyes land on him, she untangles her legs and moves the journal to the side. Solana walks over to him, keeping a distance that makes sense for her. “You’re back….”

“What are you still doing up? Don’t you have work in a couple hours?”

“It’s okay.” She shakes her head, adding sheepishly, “I–I don’t sleep much anyway.” He knows this well. “I just—I wanted to make sure you were okay.” Her eyes widen as she hones in on the nasty looking cut near the middle of his hairline. “You’re hurt….”

It’s really not until she says anything that Roman remembers the only “injury” he received from tonight’s bloodbath. “It’s fine.” He then redirects the focus to the main topic at hand. “Solana, you don’t have to wait up for me.”

She ignores him, actually ignores him and instead reaches up to feel the cut that’s maybe a bit more deeper than he realized because her feather light touch brings a bit of a sting. 

“You need stitches.” It doesn’t sound like a suggestion, and he realizes as such following her next surprising action. She takes his hand and leads him into the kitchen, motioning for him to sit down on the stool as she pulls out the medical kit from under the sink. 

Similar to the night of WarGames, she moves in between his open legs and starts tending to his cut, meticulously and carefully stitching him up.

She says not a word, and neither does he. Truthfully, it’s more an unconscious thing than conscious, like neither knows what or if to say something. Especially considering both are currently feeling more than what they know how to properly verbalize, or verbalize at all, really. 

“There….” Roman can tell when she’s done. She gently runs her fingers over her diligent work, her eyes focused on the source of her apparent concern when all he wants is for her to look at him, for her eyes to lock on him. “I think I’m—” And just as Solana goes to move away, to step back and clean up, she’s stopped. 

She’s stopped, because Roman reaches for her, keeping her near him.

His hand is initially on the small of her back, and Solana has the same experience from earlier. That initial tense feeling that quickly mellows into something almost calm, almost secure. 

She’s not sure she’s ever been this close to him, not since the last time she tended to his injuries, not since their wedding day, since their wedding night.

But unlike that last almost traumatic time, she’s not pummeled with anxiety, not paralyzed with fear. 

It’s just the calm. 

His eyes never leave her, bouncing back and forth between her eyes and lips. He then says in a low voice that’s unlike anything she’s heard from him before. “Solana….”

There’s something different about the way he says her name, something more sincere, something almost….vulnerable. 

Roman suddenly has both hands on her hips, holding her, just as her nervous hand moves to lay her palm against his chest. 

His eyes instantly shut at her touch. Interactions with anything regarding Rhodes have always done something to Roman emotionally, but it’s always been something he can manage relatively well. Something simple and easy. There’s nothing simple and easy about whatever the fuck is coursing through him at having her so close to him, having her touch, soft and unsure as the expression in her eyes. 

She doesn’t know what to make of his eyes closing nor does she have time to consider what to make of that because an image, a flashback of a different kind of touch, a much more painful, visceral touch shoots to the forefront of her mind.

And her chest starts tightening, that fear drawing back up. 

“I–I can’t.” Because as much as some part of her, albeit big or small, likes this, likes being close to him, feels safe being this close to thim, another part, much larger and much stronger, can't handle being this close to him. “I’m sorry.” Eyes watering, she breaks away, Dulce is quickly behind her, Solana reaching to hold the puppy as she dashes up the stairs. 

Roman sits unsure, confused, angry. He stands up, pacing across the floor, hands up and on the side of his head before his fist slams against the refrigerator door. He curses, but not from the blow. That shit doesn’t hurt. 

His reaction and frustration is directed solely toward the fact that he doesn’t know what the fuck he’s feeling right now.

The same thing Solana is struggling with as she sits on her bed, legs pulled up to her chest, silently crying into her thighs.

Both of them wondering the same exact thing:

What the hell just happened?

[bumblebriez]

Love Stricken (PT.1)

(Gojo Satoru x Chubby!Fem!Reader)

(PT.2)

⚠️⚠️⚠️: Smutty smutty smut, Swearing. Drinking. Gojo in loooove

Never in a million years would you think, you'd catch the eyes of a certain jujutsu sorcerer but you did and with that came alot of consequences. That you would eventually find out the hard way.

Your parents vanished a good couple of years ago with no knowledge of why and where, leaving you; the eldest, to care and provide for your younger siblings. Being responsible and forgetting about the life you used to live, you felt lost. Struggling a lot with your self worth.

Your best friend took it upon herself to finally get you to live your life a little more by taking you out on the town for a night.

But you found that night was the start of your downfall.

I plan to turn this into a series eventually and this is also the first time I'm writing in a third person, so there could be a few mistakes not to mention the spelling and grammar might be a little baaad. I'll try to fix them when I can. I'm also not the greatest at writing descriptions.

********

********

"See? Didn't I tell you, you would have fun." Your best friend shouted over the loud booming club music and the noises of the on going clubbers.

You rolled your eyes slightly, head lightly bobbing to the music as you took a sip from the straw in your drink, vodka and cranberry was your drink of choice. It definitely wasn't your first but after the persistent nagging from your bestie to actually drink something alcoholic, you went with the safe one.

"Yeah I loved the fact that I already have a migraine!" You shouted back, eyes squinting from the bright strobe lights.

From the moment you walked in on the party scene, you felt like you were being watched, as soon as your foot hit the concrete floor. You couldn't pinpoint where or who but you could feel their glaze burn holes into you, perhaps it was just the swarm that surrounded you, you couldn't tell.

"You are so dull now! You use to love going out!" You watched as Zariah downed the two shots she had ordered for herself, deciding it'll be better to not delay the inevitable.

"That was before I had kids to look after." She pouted slightly, her hand gripping your shoulder, moving closer to your ear.

"That's why you need to enjoy yourself tonight! Get fucked up, maybe even get fucked? Hmmm~" you shake your head, giggling nervously slightly at the continuous pressure. It was her plan all along. Getting you out there, finding a short distraction from what you were dealing with currently.

You twirled your straw around in your drink, pushing the Ice to the different sides of the glass.

"Stop thinking about them. They will be fine! Rast will be taking great care of them! He wants you to enjoy your night too."

Truth is.. Ever since your parents disappeared, leaving no trace behind except other children they forgot about for you to look after; to become their legal guardian. You have not had much time to yourself.

The years started to flicker by and the realisation started to set in that this was your life now. Your parents were not coming back. They were your kids now. It's a hard pill to swallow and frankly not one you were interested in but what else could you do? You felt obligated to care and provide for your siblings.

The more you worried about your siblings, the more you lost yourself. Your confidence had plummeted and your self image was shattered. Though you wouldn't let anyone know. The looks those skinny tan gorgeous girls would give you as you passed them on the street, did not go unnoticed.

The small remarks guys would leave you to ponder over, never far from your mind.

The comments you received from a previous ex, picking at your self esteem, your self confidence; resided in your core constantly.

You'd never show them that it affected you. You held your head high, trying to fake the confidence you once had.

But when you get home, it was a different story. In the privacy of your own bedroom was when the waterworks started. The constant peering in the mirror, pointing out all the differences between you and other girls. Comparing yourself and wishing for things that were in your eyes imperfections, just to go away.

You were happy alone. At least that's what you told yourself. You didn't need a guy. Especially when you looked like you.

Maybe sometimes you're too hard on yourself. Maybe.

"I don't mean to weird you out but that gooorgeous man has been eyeing you for ages." Zariah broke you out of your zoning, pointing slightly in the direction behind you.

"Consider me weirded out. Don't be silly. You mean eyeing you?" You didn't even bothered turning around to follow, he clearly wasn't looking at you. Maybe at someone who was further down the bar. If not your gorgeous best friend.

You can't seem to help yourself though, your eyes peek around before you could even react, a quick subtle peek.

You flick over the crowd of different people, trying to find the guy your best friend was talking about, until your eyes finally land on who you were looking for.

She wasn't lying.

He was *chefs kiss*

And he was already looking at you.

You couldn't see his eyes since they were hiding behind a pair of low sunglasses. His hair was almost pure white, reflecting off the neon lights that scattered around the room.

A white button up shirt with the a few of the buttons undone, sleeves pushed up to his elbows; drink resting in his longer slender fingers.

Your eyes widen as he tipped his glass at you, a devilish grin resting on his lips.

You quickly faced your best friend returning to raised eyebrows and a cheeky smirk.

"Don't even say anything." You growled, feeling almost foolish that a man of that pristine stature could be even interested in something like you.

Zariah held her hands up in defence "I wasn't gonna but he is fine." She took a slow gulp from her drink, eyes avoiding my glaze.

"You have a boyfriend." You watched her roll her eyes at you, placing her cup back down on the harden wood. "I can still appreciate a good looking guy or a girl for that matter." Her eyebrows wiggled aggressively causing you to sigh dramatically, resting your elbow on the bar; chin resting in the palm of your hand.

Just as you were about to take another sip of your drink, Zariah's eyes widen slightly before spinning around in her chair facing away from you; back in full view.

Before you could even ask what her problem was, you felt a presence appear behind you; them looming over you.

"What's a nice place like you doing in a girl like this?" You stifled a chuckle that tried to escape your throat as you turned to face the new comer, realising it was the guy you were previously checking out. Allegedly.

He leant against the bar, resting on his elbow, his full attention and glaze set on your form. That devilish grin still resting on his lips. Making you feel almost uneasy. Under pressure almost.

"Wow. How many girls have you used that one liner on?"

He tilted his head slightly, his glasses slipping down the bridge of his nose, his eyes peering from behind them. They were stunning. The brightest blue you had ever seen. It was reflecting an ocean. Unnaturally glistening, the specks of colour flowing like a river. Maybe it was just the lightning or maybe you are already tipsy from one drink.

"Was waiting to use it on the right girl." You hummed before taking a sip from your straw, fingers pressed tightly at the tip, your eyes never leaving his as you look at him with doe eyes.

"How charming of you." You smirked moving the empty glass away from you.

"I'm Satoru Gojo but you can call me Satoru. What about you gorgeous?" He pressed with a light flick of his head, his tongue wetting his lips.

"Just Y/n." You felt a slight heat starting to form within your face, this Satoru was clearly flirting with you and you had no idea how to take it. This felt a little be overwhelming for you. He was drop dead handsome and he was showing some sort of interest in you.

"Well 'Just Y/n' can I buy you another drink?" You don't say anything as you look down at your empty glass before giving a nod.

You both sit there for a couple moments more, just small talking as you take your time sipping away at your drink. A laugh here and a giggle there as Satoru throws a joke your way; slowly opening you up, allowing you to get comfortable in his presence. Completely forgetting you did not come here by yourself.

Gojo quickly downs the rest of his drink before his eyes fall on you once more "Do you wanna dance?"

Your breathing hitched slightly at the invitation, Satoru was already moving before you could even respond, pulling you by your hand through the crowds and on to the dance floor.

He placed your hand on his shoulder, placing his own large hands on your hips, guiding them to the rhythm of the music. Your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer, chest pressing against chest.

A small sweet smile made its way to your lips as you stare up at the much taller man through your eyelashes.

You started to feel a bit exposed, your eyes moved around the room, briefly looking at all the different couples that surrounded the two of you. You caught a few glimpses of a cluster of girls that weren't that far from you, noises scrunched up at you, giggling as they spoke to each other, watching you with envy. It was frankly very uncomfortable.

Fed up with the looks, you pulled back from Satoru abruptly "I'm sorry, I can't-." You muttered more to yourself than him.

But just as turned around, back facing the towering man, he grabs you by your wrist, pulling you back kind of aggressively into his chest.

Your ass press up against him, his hands resting on your hips, digging in slightly to hold you there.

"Don't think about them. Think about me." He whispered in your ear, sending cold shivers down your spine causing goosebumps all over your skin. A quiet gasp leaves your lips at the suggesting tone.

"Think about the way I'm pressed up against you." Our hips moved in a slow dance, his hands guiding me to grind against him.

"Think about the way my hands feel." Your eyes fluttered closed as one of his hands traced your prominent curves over the fabric of your dress, pulling it up slightly when he gets to your thighs, exposing some hidden skin.

"The way my lips feeling on your skin." His teeth grazed your ear lobe, moving to your neck to leave soft burning pecks on your skin, a very small whimper comes from you from the actions.

Your head lobbed back against his shoulder, allowing more access for him. Your skin was burning from the kisses. the touches.

You continue to grind against him, feeling more turned on by the minute. Especially hearing the shutters from his throat when you rub him the right way, making you uncontrollably wet.

"My god. You're intoxicating." He breathed out as he held you against him, tighter. His hand moving up your body, painfully slowly before gripping gently on to your neck, using a ringed finger to push your chin in his direction.

You let out a soft noise as your lips were in proximity of each other, you could feel the essence of where his lips need to be; hovering.

"Think about how our lips feel..." he press a soft peck on your lips before capturing your bottom lip in between his teeth. You couldn't help the noise that flowed out of you. This was so.. hot. He was hot. He was making you hot.

You leaned up to press your lips to his, nearly almost fed up with the teasing. Both of you move in sync with each other, Satoru's hand still holding your neck with no pressure. Keeping you aligned with him as your mouths explore each others; His rings leaving a cold sensation as they graze your skin.

"Wanna get out of here?" He mumbled against your lips, kissing you after each word. You smiled slightly as much as you could.

"Yes please Satoru." A slight groan came from the milky skinned man, pulling you even harder against him. "I'm loving hearing you say my name baby." A little giggle escaped your lips as he nuzzled his nose with yours.

As you both rushed through the bodies on bodies, you leave Satoru alone for just a minute while he ordered an Uber, leaving you to remember why you were here and who you were with.

"Damn. I mean damn. You better be coming over to tell me, you're going home with him." Zariah exclaimed already holding out your belongings as you made your way over to her with a bright smile on your face.

Without saying too much, you quickly lay a fresh kiss on her cheek "I'll see you tomorrow." Your best friend let out a squeal of excitement, watching your retreating form.

"Fucking finally. He better fuck her good." Zariah mumbled to herself before downing the rest of her drink. Accomplished her mission and ready to go home.

You and Satoru walk out of the club, fingers intertwined. Immediately spotting our ride. He leads you towards the SUV, opening the door open for you. Like a gentleman.

You express your appreciation before hoping in and moving over to the other side, mumbling a quick greeting to the driver.

Gojo closes the door behind him once he jumps in, scooting closer to you, not even bothering to put a seatbelt on; which the driver doesn't enforce either.

Frankly he wasn't all too bothered with keeping a conversation but that didn't seem to stop the man who was inviting you back to his.

"Had a busy night so far?" Gojo asked the driver as he wrapped an arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer to him, his other hand resting on your thigh.

You couldn't focus on both of the men conversing when Satoru hands was rubbing patterns into your skin, starting to go high and closer to where was needed to be touched. Teasing you.

You tried to control your breath, ignoring the neediness you were currently experiencing. You pressed a hand on his chest, coming to rest your head. Your eyes still stuck on his dangerous hand.

Your jaw clenched as his hand did in fact go higher, biting your lip as you feel his index finger press against the fabric of your panties; causing you to seize up.

Your eyes look to Satoru, witnessing a cheeky smirk resting on his lips as he continues to chat with the Uber driver. Feigning innocence.

Your eyes started to roll to the back of your head when he continued to rub at your clothed cunt. Your panties becoming wetter and wetter the more he pushed. You started to bite your finger knuckle to hold in any noises that might try to escape you.

You couldn't believe he would even try to do this right in the middle of this car ride, thankfully you were out of view. At least you hoped..

You started to bite harder when his finger pushed aside your panties and swiped at your slick folds, subconsciously you opened your legs wider for him. Scooting down so you were hanging off the seat.

The biting got harder when he plunged a finger past your walls, pumping in and out slowly. Curling in the right spot. His other hand was ghosting over the skin on your shoulders, causing you to shiver while being fingered in the backseat of this strangers truck.

"Ahh shit. Sorry guys. Just gotta make a quick stop. Didn't realise I was low on gas."

"No worries man. You do you." Gojo spoke up still pumping his finger into you, slightly picking up the pace but still managing to conceal you.

The very moment the man jumped out of the car, letting you guys know he'll only be a few minutes, Satoru turned to you, pushing your legs apart further "Two minutes, That's all I need."

You let out the moans you had been holding in, gripping on to his forearm as his pace became aggressive. Nothing you have felt with any man. He was hitting the right spot over and over again with his long fingers. One you honestly didn't think you had. If he kept at this, you were definitely going to cum. Which shocked you to your core.

"Who knew you were so dirty. Letting me do this to you at the chance of getting caught." He moan slightly, adding another finger to the mix. Curling up wards, pulling a quiet cry from you.

"Holy shit-" you whimpered as you felt electricity spreading throughout your body, his fingers felt so nice inside you. Gliding in and out of your wet pussy, the squelching noises were more prominent now.

"You're already so wet.. probably making a mess on these leather seats. I turn you on that much huh? God you're fucking hot." A deep growl erupted from his throat as his fingers continued to plunge deeper. Faster.

"You gonna cum? You gonna cum on these fingers? I want you too. Cum for me baby." Not only was the pleasure on a whole another level, the shock was too. How was it possible that this guy could very much bring you to the edge in five minutes? This was nothing you had ever experienced before and you are only just getting started.

You couldn't even form words, that's how bad the effect was, they only came out in moans and whines. You were nearly over the edge, stars were appearing in your vision. You squeezed harder on his forearm, nails digging deeper as you started your ascent.

"Oh fuck- I'm gonna- shit." You babbled out, your legs started to quiver as you felt yourself approaching the high, Satoru had brought you too only using his fingers.

"That's it baby. Cum all over these fingers, all over the seats." His words quite literally brought you to the edge, you felt your walls clenched around his fingers, starting to flail against him. He let out a low groan feeling you tighten around his fingers, his cock was becoming uncomfortable hard through his pants; just at the sight of you alone. The thought of you cumming on his cock. Squeezing him so nicely. Gojo was excited.

Excited to fuck the shit out of you.

Your mouth formed an O as you felt the orgasm wash over, leaving you a panting mess. You were left with no words. Completely and utterly stunned. You've never came so fast or so hard  in your life, not even by your fingers and certainly not by a man.

Satoru pressed a sweet kiss on your temple before pulling his fingers out, a small sob leaving your mouth at the bareness. He lifted his fingers to his mouth before eagerly sucking your juices off.

"Mmm. So sweet." You honestly thought you would cum again. This was so embarrassing to you. You were so hot and turned on. You honestly just wanted to fuck him right here and now, not even caring if the driver came back or not. You were becoming inpatient.

It seemed Satoru felt the same way, once he caught a glimpse of your dilated pupils, your face covered in need, he knew he was in for a long night. Satoru smirked dangerous before pressing his fingers up to your lips, not needing to wait too long when you didn't even hesitate to open, sucking contentedly on his fingers. Loving the feeling as your tongue twirled around them.

"Oh fuck-" Satoru shuttered with a slight roll of his eyes, you were something else.

Thank goodness for blacked out windows..

The driver came back, finally for what felt like hours to you, returning on the path to the destination in question.

You sat there completely dazed, thinking of what had just transpired. Trying to ignore your juices that were oozing out of you. While Satoru was whispering sweet nothings in your ear, his hand was lying in your lap and you were just playing with his fingers, his rings. The fingers that just made you have possibly the best orgasm of your life but you definitely knew that was going to change. Real quick.

But a thought couldn't help but sneak in and ruin your buzzed feeling.

How many girls has he made cum with these hands. Said the same shit too. You weren't special. You were just that, another girl to get his dick wet.

But you shouldn't care, this was only fun. This is only suppose to be a hook up. No matter if he made you feel like the only girl in the world for the night. He was good at was he does. He was good at making you feel good in more ways than physical.

The drive felt like hours, you felt like you were losing your mind as Satoru's hands were exploring your body. Trying to push aside the unsettling feeling when he brushed over your extra layers.

From the outside it seemed he didn't even care that you were a larger woman but what worried you was what he was thinking. Your head was full of intrusive thoughts.

Did he really find you attractive?

When he looked at you did he see something more?

Was he disgusted?

Was he regretting this and just being nice?

Far far out of your league.

Little did you know, Gojo Satoru found you absolutely beautiful. All six of his eyes spotted you as soon as you stepped foot in the establishment.

You were positively delicious.

He just had to have you.

And now he does. He couldn't be more happy.

"I can hear those cogs turning in that pretty head of yours." You looked towards Satoru, forcing a smile as he gently brushed his knuckle across your jaw. A small sweet smile resting on his lips; his face close to yours.

"You're really attractive." You simply said, taking in his features properly, getting a clearer picture. Away from all of bright and flashing lights.

His eyes were more sparkling than before, you found yourself looking away every now again, afraid you'd be put under a spell. Not that you'd would mind anyway..

His bone structure was out of this world, it's like he was sculpted by a god or maybe he was just a god.

He was uncomfortably ravishing.

"Mmm I get that a lot. I'm pretty hot. But you." Your eyes widen a little at his comment, not sure how to take it. His hand cupped your cheek, his eyes peering into yours.

"You are crazy fucking hot. That curvy body is going to be the death of me. I mean.. I'd die a happy man in between those thighs." You bite your bottom lip, completely speechless. This man was turning you to putty and no matter how much your body was trying to tell you he was lying. You knew deep down he meant every word.

You were shell shocked.

And unbelievably horny.

The wait was over, you had arrived at the destination. Your eyes glazed over the very large and lavish apartment complex. A completely different place to where you resided. A decently ran down 4 bedroom home that you were pretty positive was still full of mold, no matter how hard you cleaned.

Your mind immediately went into autopilot, as Satoru lead you out of the truck, muttering a quick 'thank you' to the Uber.

Satoru pulled you with him as you both stride towards the entrance, your fingers intertwined. He lead you into the lobby, towards one of the many elevators and as soon as those doors closed. As soon as he had pressed the button, you were pressed up against the glass wall. Your leg hanging loosely over his hip, hand placed securely behind your knee.

"Satoru.. they have cameras.." you whispered as he placed sloppy kisses along your neck.

"Mmm say my name again." He grumbled against your skin, having no care in the world for your protests. The only care was to hear you scream his name, no matter where you both are.

"Satoru stooop, we can't. Not here." You giggled a little as he ran his nose over your jugular. A smirk appeared on Satoru lips as he listened to your laugh.

He was compelled to hear it again and obviously since he was like the funniest person HE knew, it wouldn't be hard.

"But whyyy. You're too sweet. You taste like candy." He whined slightly pulling away to stare into your eyes, quite like staring into your soul. If it was anyone else, you probably would recoil, cringing.

Buuuut he was also kinda adorable. You thought.

You leaned forward pressing a sweet peck on his lips, Satoru dropping your leg, allowing you to correct your posture.

"I do not." You giggled yet again, pressing your hands against his chest, moving them up and down his torso.

"Do too. I can't wait to gobble you up." He pressed, your giggle pierced his ears again, causing his smile to brighten as he stared down at you, basically inhaling your beauty.

"You've got such a way with words." You sarcastically say as you give him a playful eye roll, trying to push him back slightly but to no avail, he stood strong.

"That's not the only thing, Baby." And god did you believe him.

You jump once you hear the ding of the elevator, realising you are so close to getting the life fucked out of you and that put a bounce in your step. You were nearly stepping on the backs of Satoru heels as the both of you wonder down the halls.

Your breathing started to pick up, feeling almost inpatient. You couldn't even blame it on the alcohol because realistically you only had two, you were definitely drunk on something else and you'd only experienced it briefly.

You watched as Satoru's long slender fingers, played with his keys; trying to find the right one.

And as soon as that door was opened, you couldn't even process how fast you were inside, immediately locking lips.

Satoru kicked the door shut with his foot, his hands never leaving you as he pushed his tongue past your lips. You let out a low moan as your tongues started to dance with each other.

The kiss was sloppy and ferocious. You didn't believe when people talked about sparks but in that moment, you started to believe. He left your lips tingling, nothing you've felt before. It sent waves of pleasure throughout your body. Your pussy aching, needing for this man.

You were nearly tripping over each other, bumping into things, lips never leaving each others as you both made your way through the apartment. Letting out a low whimper when your back hit the soft mattress, spreading your legs to allow Satoru to press himself against you.

"I'm fucking you. No more playing. I need to feel you around me." Satoru growled against your lips, before resuming sticking his tongue down your throat.

His hands left you, reaching down to work at his belt, he was quick and efficient, pushing his pants down his legs with one hand.

He broke from you, pushing up your dress past your hips and literally ripping off your panties, exposing your wet and dripping cunt. You'd worry about your panties later.

Satoru let out a low groan seeing you now bare beneath him, your pussy glistening for him. And only him.

You were his for tonight and he was going to rock you until you were cumming for him.

He didn't dare waste anymore time, aligning himself up at your entrance, his head bowed to watched himself push against your pussy, a moan leaving him when he felt how wet you really were, he could just slide in and you'd take him perfectly.

But he knew better, you'd need to adjust.

You were a moaning mess already, grabbing at him, bucking your hips against the ghosting tip of his cock, it was too dark to see have big he was but you soon found out as he pushed himself in.

"Fuck." He let out a staggering breath as he felt the beginning of your tight walls, you let out a sharp gasp as you take him, your fingers digging into his shoulders. The pain was real. He was huge.

You felt the pop as he finally pushed past your boundaries, a synced moan coming from both parties. Satoru moved his hips slowly, his fingers digging into his expensive sheets; restraining himself.

You were mewing lowly as he pumped into you, grateful he was allowing you to adjust to his size.

The more he felt himself able to go further without any resistance, the more he sped up.

"You feel amazing." He huffed out, rocking his hips in a steady pace. Your eyes fluttered as moans flowed effortlessly from your mouth. His cock was rubbing against your walls in just the right way. Tickling that itch you never knew you truly needed.

But you were becoming even more impatient, you wanted him to use you. You knew he was holding back and you wanted him to show you just how much.

Your hand moved up into his hair, gripping at the roots "I want you all. Don't hold back. Please Satoru."

At just the moan of his name, sent him. Before you knew it, both of his hands gripped your hips aggressively, slamming into yours.

You cried out loudly as he repeatedly did it again and again. Fucking his cock into you, hitting right into your cervix. You gripped desperately onto his forearms as he continued to plow into you; bouncing at every thrust.

You squeezed Satoru better than he imagined, you would. He stared down at your form with hunger, watching you arch your back, your beautiful mouth letting out cries of pleasures from his cock. You were taking him so well. He wanted you to scream for him.

"God. You look so good taking my cock. Taking me so well." He purred, placing a hand on the pudge of your stomach, pressing down firmly. He wished he had taken off your dress so he could see your beautiful tits bouncing from every time he fucked his cock into you.

"Satoru! Fuck. Holy shit-" You cried out, throwing your head back against the mattress, arching your back even more.

"Keep saying my name baby. Just like that." He leaned down, resting on his forearm just above your head, not before using his other hand to push one of your legs up, allowing him more access to your addicting cunt.

"AAHH fuck! Satoru!" You screamed out, feeling your body start to shake from the continuous pounding. His cock deeper inside from the new position.

"Fuck yeah. Holy fuck. You're so beautifult." He groaned, your little noises were music to his ears, his fingers digging deeper into your supple skin and you knew it would definitely leave marks.

Your lips crashed against his, teeth clashing together. Satoru swallowing each cry and moan that would try to escape.

"You gonna cum for me? You gonna cum on my cock?" He moaned in your ear, followed by hallowed panting as he pounded into you. You couldn't rely on forming any words, they were just coming out as sobs and cries. You were putty underneath him, no one has EVER fucked you this good before. You were on cloud nine.

And just as you thought it couldn't get any better, you started to feel the familiar build up. You were close. You felt like you were going to explode from the pleasure as it flowed through your body, you couldn't even warn Satoru before you released around his cock, screaming out in pure bliss as you felt yourself gush over him.

Satoru quickly pulled out and watched as you released a great quantity of liquid. Your legs shaking from the overbearing orgasm that shook your core.

He let out a breathless chuckle, realising you. HE had just made you squirt, all over him.

Your hands trembled as you brought them to your mouth, trying to control your breathing.

"Oh god. I'm sorry." You were shocked that you could even squirt and this man had not only brought you to a full penetration orgasm but he made you squirt.

"Hah Sorry? No. That was fucking hot. So hot. fuck." Satoru's breathing became heavier, his pupils dilated as he watched your trembling form, without anymore words, he slammed back into you, pulling a louder cry from you. Having seen you squirt on his cock, brought him closer to his own climax.

His thrusts were becoming sloppier and more desperate as he chased his own high. You were completely dazed, stars in your vision. Being fucked harder into the mattress. An uncontrollable moaning mess.

You tugged at his hair, yanking his head back slightly "Cum in me. I want it."

He couldn't believe his ears, as if you could get anymore sexier.

"You want it. You want my hot load inside your juicy pussy?" Your hands travelled down his back, leaving long and deep scratches, marking him red.

"Satoru- please. Cum. Please. I want it. I want you." He growled from the stinging sensation and from your voice. He was so close. So close.

"Anything for you, baby." He angled his hips and thrusted harder, until he felt it. He shoved his face into the crook of your neck as he felt his own orgasm approaching, his cum shot straight into you, causing a guttural cry from your throat as you feel it coat your walls. Satoru pumped into you until he was dry, slowing to a stop. A complete panting mess above you.

You were trying hard to catch your own breath as he lowered himself onto you, carefully trying not to crush you.

Your hand brushed through his pure white strands, as you both laid there together, in pure bliss. Panting excessively.

Satoru sat up slightly to place a sweet kiss on your lips, you of course accepted happily. He hummed softly before resting his face on your tits.

"I've never squirted before." You panted out, your eyes staring up at the ceiling. You felt embarrassed, more so for the fact you had made a mess but you also felt bewildered. You didn't think you could and you didn't think that any man could pull an orgasm out of you, let alone two, It started you thinking. How many could he make you have?

Every boyfriend you've had, NEVER made you feel like how this man did here. They were all so more selfish for their own desire than satisfying you. Even getting to the point where you would just roll over and let them have their way, sucking the enjoyment out of sex completely. Making it feel like a chore, so you wouldn't have to constantly hear their whines and moans about 'why you didn't want to fuck?'

Tsk.

"Never?" You shook your head lazily, feeling an overwhelming sense of drowsiness.

You felt him vibrate from the low chuckle he let out, his head lifting up to look you in the eyes "Well. I can't wait to make you do it again and again.." his voice was mumbled against your skin as he peppered you with wet kisses.

"And again." You felt Satoru cradle your ass cheeks, his fingers massaging intensely. Hoisting you up, angling himself up with your overstimulated cunt.

And here you thought you could sleep.

Nah. You're in for a long night.

[cuubism]

By the time half of his nine a.m. class called out sick with migraines, Hob knew something was seriously wrong.

He himself hadn’t even slept at all the night before. It wasn’t impossible for that to happen, despite the fact he was dating The King of Dreams, Lord of Sleep, etc, because Dream refused to outright control Hob’s sleep—which Hob thought was admirably restrained of him, actually. When Hob had asked why Dream wasn’t particular about it as he was about so many other things, Dream had said that ‘the mind’s independent exploration of the unconscious is crucial to mental functioning.’ So Hob being kept up by work or mundane worries was always possible, if rare given the natural effects of his proximity to Dream. 

But something about sitting up in bed that night, sleepless, nagged at his mind. He hadn’t seen Dream that day, either. Hob was a little… touchy about risks to Dream, a little hyper-attentive to hints of occult wrongdoing or broad disruptions to sleep. He’d failed to help Dream once. He wouldn’t again.

So it was already prickling at the back of his mind before he opened his laptop that morning to dozens of emails of students calling out sick. Hob himself had been spared any migraines, but all the messages dropped like stones in his stomach. Dream. It must be. Was he captured? Hurt? Did someone summon him again?

He had just sent an email cancelling class and was halfway to the door, not knowing where he was about to charge off to but doing it anyway, when Matthew landed hard on the windowsill and started pecking at the glass.

Hob rushed back over, heart jumping in his throat, dropping his bag. So it was Dream. Something was wrong.

“What’s wrong?” he demanded as he wrenched open the window and Matthew tumbled in. “What happened? Where’s Dream?”

Matthew stumbled onto the side table, flapping ragged wings. A couple of loose feathers shook out. “So he’s not here? Shit, dude, I was hoping—”

“Matthew. What happened.”

“We got attacked.” Matthew shuddered. “Boss fought ‘em off, but now I can’t find him anywhere.”

“You can’t find him in the Dreaming?” Hob tried not to let this come out hysterically, but he didn’t entirely succeed.

“The place is fucked— look, if he’s not here, you should just come back with me.” He flapped up and landed on Hob’s shoulder, claws piercing his jumper. “I think I can maybe— yep—”

The world swirled around them in a million colors, flashes of unfathomable places and sounds, and then they were stumbling dizzily into the throne room—or what was left of it.

“Shit, get back!”

Matthew hauled Hob backwards by the collar of his jumper before Hob could go tumbling into a crack— no, a void in the marble floor. It went straight down into infinity, dizzying and unreal. Heart jumping in his throat, he stumbled backward, nearly tripping. Then sucked in a deep breath and looked up and around.

The crevasse he’d nearly fallen into wasn’t the only crack in the throne room floor. The entire castle, the fabric of the Dreaming itself, was rent in concentric circles, a spiraling pattern where the rock and sky had been pulled apart from itself and nothing showed through. Slices in reality—or rather in dreams—where it cracked open into the fundamental void of the universe.

Hob look away from it, horrified, a fierce headache brewing behind his eyes. He kept his gaze trained on the intact sections of the castle.

“Place is fucked,” Matthew repeated—a massive understatement—landing again on Hob’s shoulder, well away from the crevasse. “Watch those gaps. That’s raw nothingness, it’s usually outside the Dreaming.”

“Wasn’t planning on going in them.” Hob walked carefully across the intact portion of the floor, wincing at the gouges ripping open the throne room. If the Dreaming looked like this, then Dream probably did, too. Or something like. “Tell me what happened exactly?”

“Okay, so, according to Luce, a billion years ago, these ancient beings attacked the Dreaming, and—”

——

How

dare

they?

Fools. Arrogant fools. To think that because the Dreaming was newly remade that the Dream Lord was weak. To return.

When last their paths had crossed, he had torn their leader’s spine from its back. He wore its skull still as a symbol, a warning. And yet they dared to return and challenge him again.

He had shown them. They had dug their talons in, held tight with sharp teeth, but he had strong jaws, too. He had ripped them out: root, stem, bone, cell, torn them apart, disintegrated them, shredded them just as they had asked for. It had taken much out of him. But he had shown them.

Now…

Where…

was he?

“Dream?”

Somewhere in the Dreaming…

“Hey, love. Can you hear me?”

…he had been looking for something… respite… he had not found it, quite. He had gone through a dream of burning flowers… through a nightmare of sweet lovemaking… no, that was… not right…

“Dream.”

Hands on him. The gashes torn through him where starlight leaked. Hob had made this place. A dream version of the safest place that Dream knew.

“I can hear you,” Dream murmured. Opened his eyes. The rug on Hob’s living room floor greeted him. Hob’s knees, just in his line of sight, where he was kneeling. Hob’s hands on his shoulder. He was bleeding there, and elsewhere.

Hob touched Dream’s cheek. “Took me ages to find you.”

“You made this place,” Dream said, finding Hob’s knee with a shaky hand and squeezing it.

“Did I?” Hob looked up and around. “It’s just my flat.”

“A place where we spend much time, even in dreams.” He groaned as Hob helped him sit up, leaning him against the couch. The ancient ones were destroyed, cast like so much dust out of the Dreaming, but the damage they had inflicted remained. Including on Dream’s own form.

“I tried to find your dreams,” he said, leaning his head back against the couch, already tired, “after.” He had known that Hob’s mind was a place where he might recuperate from the strain of fighting those terrible creatures, and that Hob, unlike most humans, was familiar enough with the Dreaming not to buckle under the shock of what he saw. “But you were not sleeping.”

Hob studied him with concern. “I wasn’t the only one.”

Dream stiffened. Bad enough, the damage to the Dreaming. “Have I inflicted much harm on the Waking world?”

“No, love, I think they’ll be okay. Once you are. Will you be? The throne room was, well— nightmarish.”

“I will repair it,” Dream said. He was relieved the damage had not spread too far into the Waking, though he would have to examine it himself—Hob would not be able to see the full scope. But Waking world effects were much harder for Dream to fix. And to think that he might have harmed his dreamers…

“And what about you?” Hob asked. He cupped Dream’s face in his hand. Dream still felt inestimably tired. But he had to get back to the core of the Dreaming, not this tiny corner crafted by Hob, no matter how comforting it was, or how much he might wish he could stay, just for a moment longer.

“This is not the first time the Dreaming has been attacked,” he told Hob. “I have repelled them before, and I did so again now. The damage was greater last time, in fact.”

“This may surprise you, but that’s not comforting to me,” Hob said.

“The Dreaming will not fall,” Dream repeated. “You need not worry.” He wouldn’t let it happen again. Not after that first attack, so long ago. Not after his recent absence had done so much damage.

“And what about you?” Hob repeated.

Dream knew what Hob wanted from him, but to leave to the Waking now and indulge himself in proper ‘rest and recovery’ as Hob might deem it was not an option for him. He could not leave the Dreaming in such a precarious state, no matter the effects upon himself.

He stood up, bracing himself on the couch. Hob followed him, alarmed. Dream swayed, then caught his balance and stood tall. The gouges torn through him from the monsters’ claws caught on his shirt and coat, and he winced, despite himself.

“I will not fall, either,” he told Hob. “You needn’t worry.”

Hob sighed, mouth tilting in disappointment, but didn’t tell him off. He traced his fingertips over one of the deep cuts in Dream’s coat, where a claw mark curved over his shoulder, dark blood caught in the edges of the fabric.

“I have rested here for some time already,” Dream told him. Though it had not been a wholly conscious decision to do so.

“Sure,” said Hob. Dream braced himself to again be told that he must rest. Instead, Hob tilted Dream’s head down, and kissed his forehead.

“Lover of mine,” Dream murmured, wrapping his hands lightly around Hob’s wrists. “I am sorry to worry you.”

“Let me come with you?” Hob said, but Dream shook his head.

“Matthew should not have brought you to the palace, it is not safe for dreamers. Nor even for Matthew. When I have mended the borders of unreality, then you can visit there again. I thank you—” he tilted his head at the image of the flat around them “—for your hospitality.”

“Your hospitality,” said Hob. He took Dream’s hands and squeezed them. “Be safe.”

Dream kissed Hob’s cheek, and whispered, with a curl of his power, “Wake, Hob.”

Then he was alone, and so he traveled, painfully, back to the center of his realm.

——

It rent Dream’s heart to see the Dreaming in such a state, flayed, shredded to ribbons. But the active danger had passed. This now was the cleanup after a storm, and his efforts, at least, would improve things, instead of merely staunching the flow of blood.

Carefully, deftly, as a surgeon with a needle, Dream mended the gouges in the Dreaming. Careful not to tug on the raw edges and split them again. The void retreated to its proper space beyond the walls. The Dreaming groaned in pain to be drawn back in from its chaotic spiral, but Dream made it hold. It must hold.

Soon the crevasses shrank to mere cracks in the marble, and the sky into careful patchwork of blue and clouds. Dream’s head ached, like the migraines the attack had given to some of his dreamers. He finally allowed himself to stop, to sink down to the throne room floor and press his forehead to the cold stone. It offered some relief.

He felt when Matthew reentered the Dreaming, and then the flutter of his wings as he landed beside him. To keep him away from the dangers of the fragmented Dreaming, Dream had sent him to survey the damage in the Waking world, and then, when he was finished, to appease Hob with his presence and assure him of Dream’s continued ability to stand upright.

“Uh, boss?” said Matthew, bobbing beside him, tilting his head to catch Dream’s eye.

Dream looked at him out of the corner of his eye, head still pressed to the floor. “Yes?”

“You good?”

“Yes, Matthew.”

Matthew fluttered his wings, and looked up and around at the throne room. “Place looks better?”

“The bulk of the damage is mended,” said Dream.

“Great,” said Matthew. “Well. If you’re done having floor time here, Hob would really like to see you. Like really. ‘Practically threw me out a window to check on you’ really.”

“He worries,” said Dream, with fondness.

“I wonder why,” said Matthew. Dream did not call out his insolence. This time.

He did push himself back up to sitting, then, more slowly than he would have liked, climbed to his feet. “I will call on him. Will you do a brief survey of the borderlands to check for lingering damage? Then, please rest.”

Matthew gave him a look that should not have been possible for a bird, but which Dream understood to be pointing out his own hypocrisy. But Dream did not address it, instead pulling forth a pinch of his sand, and traveling to the Waking.

——

Hob was fucking fretting like he’d rarely fretted before. He was also realizing how common an occurrence this had become since dating the King of Dreams. Fucker. Hob was going to go gray, immortal body aside.

But he would readily admit that he did also admire Dream’s dedication to his realm. Dream would not be Dream if he abandoned the Dreaming in a state—and what a state it had been—for his own needs. That was the person Hob had fallen in love with, a person whose sense of responsibility was as serious as his creations were whimsical. And love him Hob did.

He was still awake, late that night, waiting in hopes that Dream would finish his repairs and return to assure Hob of his well-being, or, luck willing, to rest a while. Waiting. Hob was good at waiting.

And his patience, his tolerance, paid off, for around four in the morning, Dream appeared in Hob’s flat by way of a cloud of sparkling sand. He looked at Hob, still sitting up on the couch, legs stretched out, reading a book. His exhaustion was evident in how long it took him to manage to say, “You are still awake.”

“Yup,” said Hob, setting aside the book. Relieved beyond measure to see him whole. Dream was even still on his feet, though looked decidedly like it would be better for him not to be.

Without further words Dream stumbled over to him, coat and shoes vanishing as he went, and curled up in his lap. He tucked his head under Hob’s chin. Buried his cold hands under Hob’s jumper.

Hob kissed the top of his head, and pulled the blanket down off the back of the couch to drape over him, wrapped his arms tight around his back. “You fixed everything, then?” he said, voice hushed in the night hour. But it was too late to ask questions, for the King of Dreams was already asleep.

[moxfirefly]

Bayverse Donnie with F!Reader (she/her)

"You think I like being like this? Every time someone fucking touches you I want to rip their hands off!"

"I...I don't want to stop. Please don't ask me to stop."

Happy holidays 💙❤️💜🧡

Oh boy yes!!! This is a great one! Let’s get it, goes without sayin’.

Rated Explicit

He hated what his overworked brain could cook up some nights, the tension that settled in his muscles whenever that nagging little monster in his head told that ‘he didn’t deserve this’.

Because Donnie’s always been a little too in tune with what he is, what he looks like.

Compared to you? You who somehow found your way in under the safety fence around his heart. You who somehow wanted to be with him and settle.

It was settling, he knew that sooner rather than later you’d wake up from your fugue state and realize this isn’t a life worth living for with him. What could he provide? Not all the typical things a partner should, he couldn’t walk out and take somewhere, he couldn’t meet your friends, he can’t marry you…

He hates how everyone gets to touch you out in the open, out in your normal life away from the violence and the secrecy.

Donnie swallows a lump in his throat when he sees Casey pull you into a hug, the free affection he could supply not just down here but up above in your real world with your real life. It’s not even about Vern and how he grabs your hand after a high five and laughs. He hates to admit that he’s thought about every other set of normal hands that have touched you throughout your day, every perfect palm that could connect perfectly with yours, each of their five fingers running a path across your body.

God, he hates how much you’ve been touched by perfectly normal beings.

There’s that little monster again inside of him, calling him a freak, a monster, you’re ruining her life, Donnie, what makes you think she’s going to stay? Why would she want your imperfect, disgusting—

“Hey? Are you alright?” You ask him, arms draped around his neck from the back of the couch, a set of beautiful arms he’d want to be his noose any day.

“Y-yeah, just a little tired.” Lie, he was gonna stay up until the migraine took over or the exhausting did him in first.

“Then let’s sneak are way back to your room and lie down.” You kissed his cheek, nudging him by the shell to get up. Everyone was still mingling about so it was easy to slip away.

He entered his room that he shared many nights with you, it was hard to fathom it was only his now. Every little corner held something of yours and on nights you couldn’t stay over he found comfort in your lingering scent.

“You aren’t alright are you?” He caught your voice muffled from the shirt you were taking off, showing off skin he could pick out from a hundred yards away. How acquainted he was with each blemish, freckle, scar…

“Is there anything from your ex boyfriend that you preferred? …liked I mean, or that he has that I don’t?” This is a Pandora’s box and from the way your eyebrows shoot up he knows it’s a bad idea but Christ he’s floundering.

“Absolutely nothing, why are you bringing him up?” You tossed your shirt aside, kicking off your shoes next and progressively becoming more aware that Donnie was holding back a giant wave of something not good right now.

“I’m just trying to make sense of something… I know why you both broke up but you were with him, there was an appeal at some point.” He wants to look away, drop the conversation but his hands feel tense and his skin itchy.

“There was an appeal before I found out who the real him was, appeal went away pretty fast if you ask me, baby why are you—“

“What’s the appeal here?” He motioned to himself, to his form, his face, his everything. “Because I can’t see it for myself, I don’t know why you’re here…with me.” His voice felt lumpy, crackling like a detuned radio.

You stood stock still, shocked at his words.

“What’s bringing this on? I haven’t spoken to that asshole in years, Don. What appeal? He has none, I’m with you.” You took a step, he took one backwards.

“You’re going to want things I cannot give you even if I would sell my soul for them. I—I can’t give you kids, or a normal home, or marriage, for fuck sake look at me, where does this make sense??” He sat down aggressively on the bed, he needed to concentrate on something else than your worried face. With shakey hands he began to untie his boots.

He saw your feet first, through the thin film of tears, god he didn’t want to cry now.

Gently you took his glasses off and set them on the night table.

“What’s going on? Tell me the truth, why are you acting like this? Why are you bringing my ex up all of a sudden to fight—” The deep concern, the frown lines on your forehead, he had you so damn worried.

“You think I like being like this? Every time someone fucking touches you I want to rip their hands off!” He didn’t mean to blow up but this hand bubbles, seeped over the mug and now there was no stopping it.

“I’m never going to understand why you would rather waste your life away with a monst—“ he felt your hands shoot up and cover his mouth.

“You are not a monster, Donatello, and if you ever use that stupid word to describe yourself ever again, I’m throwing a wrench at your head.” You let your hand slip away, instead you cupped his face. “I’m with you because I love you, you were my friend first and now you’re the most important thing in my life, and none of this is going to stop my feelings.” You rubbed your thumbs affectionately around his cheeks. Donnie’s gaze fell, eyes still red from holding back tears. He pressed his face against your sternum, and once you felt those large armed enclose around you, you hugged him tight.

“I—I’m sorry, I—fuck,” He sighed against your skin, finding comfort in your flesh as he often did.

“It alright, just please don’t ever question how I feel, okay?” You kissed the top of his head, letting yourself be pushed closer to him, he needed this, needed the physical reassurance. “I love you, Donnie, I love you so much.” You carresed him, cheek against the top of his head. Donnie’s hands found the back pockets of your jeans, hooked his fingers in and began to shove them down.

He needed more, he needed you and you knew it.

“I…I don’t want to stop. Please don’t ask me to stop.” He kissed each words onto your stomach, bit the periods onto your flesh and he dragged your underwear down as well. Effortlessly he picked you up and placed you on the bed with another feverish kiss that sent your head spinning. He bit more of those pleads onto your neck, grinding himself between your legs with intent of having your scent on his clothes forever.

It was messy, desperate and filled with longing. You somehow pushed down his pants with the heels of your feet and told him, gently and with need that you wanted him inside of you.

And he could never say no to you, he could never deny you a single thing.

So when he slipped in to the heat that he belonged to, to the woman that could drive him to burn the world at a moments time, he could feel a little less self hatred.

Your moan, long and aching, always a task to adjust to his size but never an unwelcome burn, blessed his ears. He needed this, he needed you inking those words and sounds with each thrust.

Donnie watched transfixed, enamored with your flushed skin and hooded eyes. Watched as your hands reached for him when he sat back on his knees. He hooked an arm beneath you and held you against him as he thrusted upwards with every intent of fucking these awful thoughts out.

“Fucking—Love you,” Donnie’s lips pressed against your own, the intimacy of spilling his love against your own lips too much for him. You moaned against his mouth, moving in tune with him to chase the high. ‘I love you’ you mouthed as you felt your voice be replaced with another lustful moan. Donnie half smiled, drunk off of your scent and deep into how perfect you felt wrapped around his cock. He held you like that, arms secure around you as he fucked the first load into you just as you came with a tightening and broken wail.

When you felt your back against the blankets and felt him continue to thrust, pushing past the oversensitivity, you knew he needed more.

He needed so much more.

[aouiaa]

Ceo!abby coming home after a day of hard work🙏🏻

Reciprocated Love

Outline: Everybody wants/has a job, but hates the stress that comes with it. Thank-fucking-god Abby has her stress reliever at home waiting, all prettied up, just for her.

Word Count: 407

Warnings: FLUFF + Mentions of past relationships (A) + OTHERWISE JUST PURE GAY :D (Sigh…i love lesbians)

Imagining Ceo!Abby coming back from an exasperating day of work. Hearing her assistant nagging about her deadline to signing off on deals. Upcoming meetings that she can’t even comprehend anymore. And don’t get her started on the incompetent dunces she has to call employees. Just thinking about it right now brought the beginnings of a migraine.

She’s rubbing her eyes as she walks through the front door, ripping her keys off from the lock and shutting the door behind her with her foot. The pressure on the sides of her head are the first stages of hell.

“Abby?”

There it was, the painkillers to her pain. Your sweet as honey voice. Her eyes snap open as a smile immediately adorns her face. There you are, walking out of your shared bedroom with a concerned look painted on your face.

“Migraine?” you inquired.

A sigh escapes Abby’s lips—one, she didn’t know she was holding, “Yeah—fucking migraines.” She shakes her head with a huff.

A light chuckle can be heard from you, “Alright, lemme get the Tylenol.”

It was heartwarming to know how much you care for her. It made her feel appreciated since her whole life was so chaotic, and so she never really had the time for relationships. And when she did, it was always her that gave, gave, gave! Never once received. Received, the one thing she yearned for.

Reciprocated love.

Maybe that’s why watching you go to the kitchen to grab painkillers for her was the best thing to watch happen. Yes, it was the bare minimum, but to her, it was everything. You showed that you care for her, not her wealth or status, her.

Now the longer she waited around, the tighter the pressure around Abby’s head grew. Squeezing her eyes shut again, groaning at the discomfort while bringing her hand up to her head to try and smooth the ache. The familiar sound of pills rattling grabbed her attention, causing her to open her eyes again.

In front of her were two white pills in the palm of your hand, “Here, and go take a shower. I’ll be in bed with the humidifier on.”

A smile shines on her face, “With the lavender oil?”

Another chuckle escapes your lip, “yes—with the lavender oil.” you confirm with a nod and smile.

Abby nods and walks off, but not before kissing your cheek. Showing appreciation to the best girl in the world.

You.

Please look at these links for palestine!! — How you can help Palestine, Why you shouldn’t support tlou/ buy the remastered, Educate yourself, #FREEPALESTINE. Please look at them, if you could read this, you can take a few moments to learn and support palestine!

a/n; You don’t know how loud I screamed when I seen this! My neighbors probably thought I was getting killed LMAOOO! But dude it’s so fucking crazy to because i was just talking to my ex about how I need to come up with an Abby fic and this shit pops us?! MY MANIFESTATION IS SO STRONG

If you wanna send in a request of your own, click here!

(Don’t be shy!)

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[glacierclear]

ISN'T BITE ALSO TOUCH?

fuckboy!leon x gn!reader (maybe a few gendered terms oops)

content: hurt/no comfort, angst, arguments, passive aggression, mentions of drugs/alcohol

Your best friend is a fuckboy. He ditches you at a party. You argue. Maybe they were right about him.

[ao3 link]

They all tried to tell you. Every single one of them.

He’s bad news, don’t bother. You would scoff.

He’s nothing but a walking penis. He doesn’t care about anything. And you’d roll your eyes.

Every red flag. Every warning sign. Every flashing light. You refused to heed any of them. And you tilled, and you sowed, and you fed. And now? You were reaping.

“I don’t get what the big deal is. You’re a big kid. You don’t need a damn babysitter.” His hands remained clenched, balled up and shoved into the pouch of his hoodie. His posture was lax. Noncommittal. He stared into a wall, his expression detached and unreachable.

“When you called me up tonight to drag me to some stupid frat party, I at least expected you to like, stay with me,” you countered. “We weren’t even there for an hour before you up and ditched me. Streaking across campus like a moron.” The base of your neck throbbed, the fledgling burn of an oncoming migraine. Your clothes still reeked of burnt weed and the cloyingly pungent whiff of cotton candy vape smoke.

“You should be fucking grateful. Wouldn’t have gotten into that party without me. Shit was the best thrasher of the month.” He lifted his head, scorching you with that know-it-all smirk. It huffed the coals of your stomach. You felt like puking.

“I didn’t…oh my god, Leon. I didn’t go for the party. I thought you…I don’t know. I thought you actually wanted to hang out. Have a good night.”

Your fingers burrowed their way through the folds of your sheets and you stayed perched at the edge of your bed. Leon hovered at your doorway, barely present in the space of your dorm, his contour fuzzed with casting light.

He didn’t say anything. Your eyes pulsed and stung. “Look. I’m not mad, I just–”

“You should be.”

“What?”

It’s then that he finally dared to meet your eyes. Blue hues swallowed whole by the pitch of his pupils, seeking you past tendrils of mussed, blonde hair.

“You should be mad. Why aren’t you? Cuz’, you’re right. I fucking ditched you. Like a moron.” He flung the word back with acid and you winced away. “God forbid I have some fun, right? Forgot you’re too much of a buzzkill to actually have fun at a party.”

There’s a throttling impulse to scream at him. Tell him off for being unreasonable and kick his ass to the curb like last week’s trash. But you’ve danced to this song before. The repeating pattern and pervasive enigma of Leon’s refusal to invest himself; emotionally, or otherwise.

So, you sucked in a steadying breath, filled your lungs with patience, and spoke softly.

“It’s not just about the party,” you began, and passively, you noticed him shift. “I mean…streaking? You realize that if you got caught doing that…you wouldn’t have a scholarship anymore. Hell, maybe you’d be expelled.”

The realization settled on him like a poison and you caught his face darken. As much as he denied and disguised, Leon was a smart man. Excellent standing in his classes and a whopping GPA to match the third leg he swung in his pants. It meant a lot to him.

There’s a gap of silence before he opened his mouth again.

“...well, I wasn’t caught. And it was my choice. I don’t need you nagging me like a fucking mom, alright?” His body shrunk in on itself. Caging his softer parts from the reality he narrowly avoided. On a better day, perhaps you’d chase him. Push and fight for a break in his shell, a crevice that gave way to the man you knew he was capable of being. But, God, your head was shattering. Your nausea was worsening. You weren’t making progress.

“Right, well, sorry for caring, Leon,” you relented, turning away from him to click your phone into its charger. “I’m going to bed. Don’t bother inviting me to any more parties.”

Your gaze left him, you weren’t fully aware of his body, but in the fleeting moments following your surrender he’s on you. Lurking above you like the baleful firmament of a roaring summer storm. You hardly had the time to open your mouth before he’s speaking. No, he’s growling. Revving the engine of his fury.

“...so that’s it? You’re not putting up with me anymore?” It could be the headache talking, but you swore you heard a tremble in his voice.

“Huh? The fuck are you–”

“We’re not friends anymore. That’s what you’re doing, right?” You searched the raging sea of his eyes for a raft. But all you did was drown. “I fucked up one too many times and now I’m just another shitty dude you had to put up with.” You watched the chipped black of his nails dig into his arms, tensed up limbs shielding him from what he’s most afraid you’ll confirm.

“Leon, that’s not…we’re still friends, okay? I just don’t want to go to parties like that anymore. Just give me a few days to cool off and we can…I dunno, we’ll hit up that burger joint you love.” It’s a pretty weak bargain, but maybe he’d bite.

And he did bite. He bit and he tore and he sought out blood.

“You’ve always had shitty taste in guys.” He practically spat at you, a scornful wrinkle deepening in the bridge of his nose. “Fucking stand up for yourself. You always let people walk all over you and act surprised when they turn out to be shitheads.”

He leaned in. You smelled him. Overpriced cologne. Underpriced shampoo. Crappy beer he drank even though he hated the taste. Despite it all, you yearned to hug him.

“Leon, I–”

“...and you know what? I don’t fucking need you. I don’t need your little dates. Your pity sex. I don’t need you looking out for my damn scholarships and I especially don’t need you making me look bad when I’m trying to let loose at the party I’ve been looking forward to all goddamn month.” You wanted him to stop. You wanted to bridge the chasm and devour his violence. If only he’d let you. But all he did was bite harder. “I won’t bother inviting you out anymore. Actually, I won’t bother talking to you at all. Have fun with your fucking life, I’m done being your fucking charity. Goodni–”

At the edge of his precipice, the void he dug for solace, Leon plummets. He straightened his spine, eyes widening and jaw hanging lifelessly. You were crying. Tears bursting without prejudice. Staining your face in vulnerability you so often only used to comfort him.

He went too far. And now, you were crying.

Neither of you moved for an eternity. From the hallway of your dorm, you hear the thundering trots of drunken friends laughing and yelling. The noise swelled and faded. The only evidence of a world beyond your room.

He called your name. His voice was so much quieter, held together with twine and stinging regret. You lifted your eyes and your throat barely allowed your words to pass.

“...Great job, Leon. Now I’m mad.” In an act of self-preservation, you tore your gaze away, burning a stare into the ground below his shoes. They’re blotched with dirt and chlorophyll, still damp from his midnight misdemeanor. “I won’t bother you anymore. If you hate me that much, I…I’ll leave you alone.”

His arms unfolded, one hand reaching out, a fragmented attempt to soothe you. But it was too late.

He repeated your name.

“I didn’t…fuck, I shouldn’t have said…hey–”

“Go home, Leon.” Your voice was unwavering, and he flinched back, your ire the open flame he’s too human to touch.

And then he left. Your dorm vibrated with the slam of the door, and you buried your face in your hands. In the place of his feet, soil stained your carpet. In the place of his warmth, sandalwood smoldered the air.

In the place of your love, all you wanted was to die.

[adventuringblind]

Sunrise

Oscar Piastri x Autistic!Reader

Genre: Angst

Summary: The fans and media get to Oscar’s girlfriend in a way he’ll never forgive

Warnings: SUICIDE AND SH depictions, toxic media, death threats, lack of communication, anxiety, Oscar is a mess.

Notes: …. We’re not talking about my patterns alright. I swear I’m in therapy.

Masterlist

Oscar is not normally an irrational person. He prides himself on his calm and collected state. Something that his neurodivergent counterpart loves because it makes him easy to read. Everything is clear to her with him.

He adores his girlfriend. Plans to eventually marry her one day. He doesn’t care that her body isn’t the ‘standard’ for beauty because he finds her stunning. He doesn’t care that she has deep passions for her interests and could talk for hours about it because he loves listening.

So why is it his fans don’t get that same thing? Why do the vultures have to attack her for doing nothing wrong?

He ponders these questions as he sits in the hospital waiting room. Fingers crossed he got to her in time.

~

She’d turned off all her notifications on social media. She had to. For some reason now that Oscar and McLaren are on track and fighting again, people are seeming to notice her more often.

Gone are the days of sneaking off into the quiet corners. Numbered are the days she’ll be able to spend with him at this rate.

The death threats started a month ago. To many things she’d rather not think about. The name calling is flat out unnecessary and something she doesn’t understand.

She knows logically nothing can come if it. But the nagging at her brain won’t stop for some reason. She hates it, being empathetic. She just feels so extremely that she can’t decipher if the words hurt her or if she’s angry and why she feels this way. It’s to much for her mind to process.

So she turns everything off. No social media for her.

She’d simply told Oscar the hate was to much and she needs a break from the internet. Which isn’t a lie, but she didn’t want him to worry about her and start doing poorly because of it.

Instead curled up underneath her blankets with music and switched off the world.

~

Oscar is feeling alright with fifth in Hungary. Not exactly where he wants to be, but it’s still considerably better then where he was previously.

As is routine, he gets into the garage as quickly as he can. The one thing he managed to negotiate for with his PR team: the he gets to check in on his girlfriend before he does media duties.

He peers inside. It’s mostly empty due to the incoming podium celebration. But there is no sign of her. Nothing is the garage or his driver room or Lando’s room, or the bathroom.

His heart thuds in his chest. This is routine, and she always sticks to her routine. If she’s not here then something must be terribly wrong. Oscar pulls out his phone to see he has a text from her and the weight on him lessens just a tad.

‘Sorry I won’t be there for the end of the race! I was feeling incredibly sick so I went back to the hotel room! I love you so much! 🧡🖤’

And suddenly that weight is back. If she left then something is clearly wrong. She’s stayed through blurry vision from migraines, endured hours of overstimulation for him, even dealt with his fans pushing her around. Yet she always stayed. If something caused her to leave then it’s definitely something to worry about.

He ended up missing the podium celebration. His PR manager is looking for him. But he could care less and heads straight for Zak.

He gives a brief summary of what’s going on and defines is as an emergency. That word was what made Zak let him go as long as he promised to keep everyone posted.

Then he ran.

~

Race weekends have come to be one of her favorite things. The consistent hum of car engines stimulates her brain in a way that she loves.

What she doesn’t love is the fans. She wonders for a moment if all the WAG’s have this kind of hate. So she sets off to go find Lily and ask. She’s become close with her over the course of this year. She’s also passionate about things and it’s fun to listen to her get excited over her interests. Something the female can relate to well.

When she neared the Williams hospitality, she saw Lily and waved her over only to be stopped in her tracks by a few fans in McLaren gear. She instantly took notices of the very blatant disregard for personal space and the negative energy they carried with them.

Then they out in some fake smiles and handed her an envelope, walking away without a word.

She was left confused and stunned. But also curious. The envelope in her hands had some weight to it and she can’t help but wonder what’s inside.

She doesn’t hesitate to open it. Her eyes scanning over the contents. Every second she looks at it makes her feel sick to her stomach.

Someone had been stalking them. Not just her and Oscar, but Lando as well. Addresses, pictures, personal information, even images from intimate moments where they are very clearly without clothes.

She could see the possibility of her and maybe Oscar being stalked if these are the same fans who have been harassing her for a couple months now. But Lando as well makes her feel dirty and upset in a way.

It’s to much. She feels to much. It’s overwhelming.

She stuffs everything back inside and finally gets to Lily. A brief excuse leaves her lips that she’s going back to the hotel cause she’s feeling sick. She takes note of Lily’s instant concern and the female does her best to fight back every emotion. It’s utterly draining. She has no energy to sort out her feelings and other peoples feelings when she can’t understand any of them anyway.

Lily lets her go on the condition she texts her when she gets back to the hotel.

She agrees. She'll be messaging everyone when she gets there.

~

Oscar gets into his car and fumbles around for the keys.

He left them with his stuff. His stuff that he doesn't have. Now he's going to have to run all the way back.

He gets out and heads straight to the McLaren garage. Ignoring the strange looks.

He even tries pulling his phone out to call her. Straight to voicemail. Twenty times.

Halfway there, he runs into Lando. The Brit is winded and carrying Oscar's things.

"I'm driving."

~

She can't believe she's actually going to do this. It's not that she's never thought about it before. Feeling alien on your own planet will do that to you. But she feels like she has no other choice.

It's too much. The fans want her dead, and they are willing to do horrible things to get it.

She can't handle it. The feelings of all of it are overwhelming. She can't tell where her emotions end and someone else's start. The letter written to her only points out further.

The last few months have been beyond her limit. She doesn't feel safe in her own skin. Everyone is telling her she'll never be enough. That she is not meant for this life.

She'd thought about her friends as she wrote those damn notes. The blank looks when she says something lnnapropriat for the conversation. The times she's had meltdowns and they had to deal with her.

She thinks about Oscar, too. His note is three pages long. It's intimate, and she hopes he can understand it. Words she's written countless times the last months to make sure he understands her decision.

She lays it out where she knows he'll see it and then locks herself in the bathroom. The bathtub is filled with ice-cold water and not filled all the way to the top. Just enough to make things easy.

Is she really doing this because those damn fans are going to leak everything about their lives tonight if she doesn't? Certainly a factor in her decision. It seems the logical solution if she's to fix the problem. She hates herself for this; that she can't just be what everyone wants.

That thought brings the first cut.

She didn't bother taking off her clothes. She hates the feeling. They cling to her skin and it makes her want to peel her skin off.

The second cut is for her clothing.

Then the third.

And a fourth.

The fifth makes her dizzy.

The sixth causes her vision to dance.

The seventh and eighth she can't even register.

Everything is numb by nine and ten.

Then nothing.

~

Oscar and Lando take three steps at a time.

Apparently, Lando had run into Lily and found out what had happened. The Brit also felt his stomach drop with the feeling something is wrong.

Oscar sprints down the hall when they make it to the right floor. Fumbles around with his key card. Then, finally, he gets the door open.

He scans the room. There is paper stacked neatly on the table. An envelop almost thrown to the side.

He looks at the note addressed to him, and he chokes. Lando is searching for any sign of life but the Aussie can't see past the fact that there are fans asking her to kill herself. And that she felt the need to say yes because now they have stalkers.

He'll think about it later. Right now, Lando is screaming for him.

He barrels to where the voice comes from. Again, he chokes. This time on frantic tears.

Lando is looking like he might pass out, but the Brit is staying strong for his teammate and friend. He tries to get Oscar to help him.

She may be passed out, but the Aussie registers Lando saying she has a pulse. That she's still breathing even if it's shallow.

They work together to drag her out of the water. Her make it so that when they set her down, she immediately is sliding on the tile. They wrap her arm in wash rags. The only thing they can find to slow the bleeding. But the cuts are too deep. It doesn't slow.

So they call an ambulance.

Oscar doesn't register much after that. Listening to Lando instruct him on what to do, including breathing. Riding with her to the hospital. Watching her be taken away. Meeting Lando in the waiting room.

Now he has nothing to do but wait and look through everything he missed.

Her socials are where she's being threatened, sure. But it's the contents of the envelope that got Oscar angry. Way past the point of livid.

"Lan, I- what the hell." He shows everything to his teammate, and terror stretches across his face.

And then she was left with a ticking clock and an ultimatum. Disappear or have all this and more released to the public. What better way to disappear than to do it permanently.

It breaks him. He can't breathe past the thought of not having her around. He can't live knowing she left because the world is suck a cruel place. And he feels utterly selfish for wishing her to stay with him through it.

Somehow, he ended up on the floor, sobbing dramatically into Lando's sweatshirt.

But then others start to appear. It's not just the two of them because there are so many people that care for her.

Max shows up first with a certain Monegasque in tow, followed by Alex and Lily, the latter of which looks about as broken as him. Then George and Lewis appear, followed by Logan.

They explain what happened. Everyone is shocked, and there are no words between them for a few minutes as everyone processes.

"I don't understand why someone would do this." Pipes Max. He knows about death threats fairly well, but this is a new level of extreme.

"We could say something. Make a statement about it and start a suicide awareness campaign." Lewis suggests.

Oscar knows a campaign probably won't do much against whoever sent this, but a statement might. He wants to say everything on his mind.

And that's exactly what he did. His PR team be damned because this takes precedence.

~

She wasn't expecting to wake up. She wasn't supposed to wake up. So how is she awake?

She cracks her eyes open just a tad to assess her surroundings. Her arm is bandaged and she's underneath some of the worst textures to come in contact with.

The thing that catches her eye is the brown locks of a specific Australian. She moves her hand to them and runs her fingers gently along his scalp.

he shifts around a bit before relaxing into the feeling. At least she could give him this before she ruins his and Lando's life.

She's not sure how long they go on like this until Oscar sits up and yawns. He blinks a few times and adjusts himself to the florescent lights.

She's not sure she's ever seen Oscar cry before. Once at a really sad movie, but even that was just slight. Now he's crying tears for her. The sound makes her tear ducts spring into action as well.

"Please, don't ever do that again." He rasps. His voice crackles with the sound of sobs.

She doesn't say anything. She can't say anything. So instead, Oscar crawls into the bed with her. He just cradles her body into his.

"I'm sorry." Is all she manages to say. And after a few more breathes she continues. "I didn't want to be the reason you and Lando lose your jobs. Or be the cause of your stress. And then everything felt like it was too much, and I just wanted it to stop." She feels pathetic.

"I promise that I will never be upset with you for something like this. The fans pushed and pushed and then drove you into a corner. But in the future, you have to come to me. I can't help if you don't communicate with me."

"What about racing? And Lando? And all your personal information?" The weight she'd had before has made a sudden return.

"Should be taken care of. We beat them to the punch and made a statement about how someone close to McLaren had been threatened and the person responsible would be posting personal information." Oscar explains. She feels better knowing they didn't say it was her name. "I also said I would be taking a break from socials for personal reasons... and also said something about how much I love you."

~

The news came out eventually. It's not every day that F1 driver's campaign for mental health. But they've all been incredibly helpful. She is on the road to recovery and Oscar intends on being with her through every step of the way.