#NEVER trust ren to make an announcement. and i do mean NEVER

[riacte]

at some point ren and martyn are going to sit down in front of a camera on the charity stream and solemnly declare they have a serious announcement to make and the vibe is so ??? that it somehow feels like they’re going to illogically announce they’re dating but it’s actually just a shared merch drop. treebark trophy stream equivalent

[urfavstargirl1]

The Empress, Part V

A/n: Here’s a short chapter for the week. It brings me a lot of joy to know y’all are reading and enjoying this story, so thanks for checking it out. Hope y’all like this chapter :)

AO3 Link

Kylo Ren x Female Reader

Words: 3453

Chapters: 5/10

Chapter Summary: Y/n and Kylo return from their mission to Planet Korr. The two learn to trust each other, but can they trust those around them?

Story Summary: (tentative) As Kylo Ren steps into power as Supreme Leader, he struggles to use his power to effectively lead the Empire. Y/N is a renowned Commander eagerly working her way up the ranks. Her loyalty to the Empire is tested when the Supreme Leader suddenly takes an interest in her. When one date becomes several and she is ultimately tasked with becoming Empress and wife of the Supreme Leader, will Y/N be able to handle that kind of power outside the commander’s uniform?

CW: swearing, angst, romance, kissing, fluff

I shut my book close and make a noise that resembles the combination of a gasp and squeak. I opened it again and reread the paragraph.

“Finally,” I comment and a chuckle ensues next to me, making Kylo’s body vibrate against mine. He closes his own book and shifts to face me.

“What happened, my love,” Kylo asks. He looks down at me and tries to hide his smile. I look up at him.

“Astrid and Zirman kissed,” I say bubbly and he raises his eyebrows.

“Is that what’s gotten you all riled up,” he says, absentmindedly running his fingertips along my thigh draped across his waist.

“You don’t understand, this has been building up the entire book. There’s nothing more satisfying than when two characters start out as enemies and then end up falling for one another,” I explain while putting my fingertips together.

“These are the sorts of tales that you enjoy,” he asks with a quirked brow. I nod eagerly.

“If you’re going to judge me so, why don’t we see what you’re reading Mr. Ren,” I ask. He reaches over for his book and hands it to me.

“It is an ancient text from this distant planet called Earth. It is called The Art of War,” he announces.

“Why am I not surprised,” I tease.

“It’s quite riveting literature actually,” he responds. He looks at me and then opens his mouth as though he wants to say something but then he doesn’t. He sighs, closes his mouth, and then a smile suddenly starts forming on his lips.

“What,” I ask with my head cocked to the side.

“Nothing… I just… wanted to relish this moment. I’ve longed for something like this,” he replied. My heart flutters. 

“So have I,” I responded.

I think about my friends and my work peers. They are all people I cherish dearly, but oftentimes I find myself only being able to show one side to each. I constantly worry over which parts of myself I should show or hide in order to fit in, but I never quite have to worry about that with Kylo. The person I am in my uniform can be quite different from the person I am outside of it and Kylo not only understands them, but likes them both too. 

“What is on your mind, little star,” he inquires before kissing my forehead.

“I could tell you, but wouldn’t you already be able to see for yourself,” I ask.

“What ever do you mean,” he replies.

“Well, can’t you just use the Force to read people’s minds,” I ask.

“I … can. Although, I mainly use it on enemies or individuals who I sense are lying to me,” he explains. Ever since the trip, I’ve been wanting to know more about his powers. He speaks about The Force with a rational approach… but a rational approach for something as powerful as The Force doesn’t sound very much like Kylo.

“Do you use it often,” I ask.

“Relatively speaking...yes,” he admits.

“Would you ever use it on me,” I ask. My body contracts, preparing for whatever it is he has to say. He senses my response and pulls my body closer to his.

“What is the matter? You are acting very worrisome,” he says with concern.

“Kylo, please answer the question,” I calmly pleaded.

“If you must know... then my answer is no. When it comes to you, I made a promise to myself that I would not. Admittedly, there have been times when I wanted to, but it did not seem fair to be able to read into your mind if you could not do the same to me,” he responds. I look at him and process his words. What he says should be reassuring, but for some reason, I don’t believe him.

“You do not believe me, do you,” he asks.

“Ha, so you can read my mind,” I say.

“I can, but I did not. I did however see the look of apprehension on your face,” he snickers and I slump against him.

“Why is this troubling you so, y/n,” he asks. How is he being so calm and level headed right now? It only makes what I’m about to say sound even crazier.

“I’ve never had to deal with something like this before. It is a bit scary because I don’t really understand it and I am quite powerless against it. I didn’t think your connection to The Force would be of such importance or consequence to me until our mission. Seeing you use The Force to manipulate those Amian panel members was frightening. I know it’s only been two days, but I still have the image of you purposely, tactfully, almost happily coercing people to bend to your will engrained in my head. I fear that if you could do something like that with such ease… then how could I protect myself if you were to ever do the same to me. I know you say you wouldn’t, but that’s right now when there is peace. What if in a moment if conflict you were pushed to your limit and you did use The Force on me?”

“I see. I was not aware of your concern,” he contemplates. He squeezes me tightly.

“This is the only way I’ve ever known to be. I did not realize how troublesome it was for those without. I suppose I would feel the same way if I was in a similar circumstance. However, I would like to ask, do you think you would still have this fear or apprehension even if you did have a strong connection to The Force?”

“I don’t know. I suppose it would be less. If I could defend myself I would be less afraid. But I still think I would have some concern for your intent. I would still have fear that you may use your powers against me even if I had some power in defending myself against you,” I say and instantly realize why I’m feeling this way. 

“Kylo,” I say, interrupting his processing of my words.

“I think I understand what’s really troubling me. To be clear, I still fear The Force because it is not something I understand well, but I know that can be changed. But what I can’t change is the possibility that you may hurt me. It might not be now, but some day in the future, there may be a time when that happens. I’ve seen you do it to others, so it only makes me wonder how I can be any different–”

“You are. You are so very different from any of those other people because you are the woman that I love. There has been no other before or that will come after that I will love in any capacity compared to thee. For you, I will restrain my capabilities because the last intention I will ever have in this galaxy is to bring even an ounce of pain to you. You are the brightest star in my life and I cannot live with myself if I have done anything to ever dull your shine,” he declares and his words strike a nerve. They strike several in fact, which is what is now producing the small tears to flow down my cheeks like a lazy river. He leans forward and kisses along the trails of tears left behind.

“Kylo…” I manage to slip before sniffling. His words are so beautiful and they mean so much to hear them, but how do I know they are true? It is easy to say such words, but much more difficult to act upon them.

“Y/n, I know you may not believe me now, but I promise to prove my worthiness to you. I promise to be someone you trust and are protected by. I will continue to prove this to you everyday even if it means proving it for the rest of my life,” he promises. I nod softly against his warm chest. 

The rest of his life? That’s a long time. Who’s to say if I’ll even be in his life for that long? The possibilities are overwhelming to think about. But at this moment, one thing is clear. My trust in him is not something that can easily be amended in a day. It is something that we both will have to work on and continuously uphold. For Kylo, I am willing to take that risk.

  —

I had a few days to rest and recover after the mission, but my first day back on duty was more difficult than I would have imagined. As expected, anyone and everyone wanted to know how it went.

“Commander Y/n, congratulations.”, “Commander Y/n, cheers to a successful mission.”, “I knew you could do it.” were phrases thrown at me in the days from my return to Starkiller base. I don’t know how some people knew so quickly. Perhaps the news was relayed by the Supreme Leader or General Hux.

Sometimes, it was nice to hear such praise, but others, it wasn’t as satisfying. Being congratulated for something that I didn’t necessarily achieve on my own or in an authentic way felt wrong. It felt as though I was being praised for cheating. I know, this progress is monumental for the First Order, but it feels like false progress, despite what Kylo says.

“Y/n it was the only way,” Kylo asserted.

“No it wasn’t and you know it.”

“It may be, but what’s done is done. And if there’s any consolation, I did what I did for you. You have no idea how ready I was to blow Korr up into a million little pieces but I knew how much it meant for you to save the planet and maintain a connection for the benefit of the First Order. I know you didn’t like it but can you please see that I did what I had to do to please both you and the First Order?”

But by the time it had reached my midday meal, I no longer felt energized from the praises of the morning. I know I’ll come to terms with it eventually. But regardless of my own feelings, nothing could have prepared me for the words I exchanged with my peers that day.

“So, how did your mission go,” Locke asked me. 

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” I retorted.

“Would you ever think I didn’t,” he quipped.

“Guess not,” I shrugged.

“Please Y/n, tell us everything,” Neela inquired.

“The mission was successful. I am very grateful to have been part of the coordinated effort that brought Korr to the First Order,” I offered diplomatically.

“You’ve been spending a lot of time with the Supreme Leader,” Neela commented.

“What,” I asked, freezing with my forkful of food hanging midair.

“Wasn’t it just you, him, and the generals on the mission,” Locke asked.

“Oh, um yeah,” I replied, suddenly very disinterested in my meal.

“That’s ridiculous,” Locke said.

“Why do you say that,” I ask.

“You and all those high ranking officials. How did you even end up on that mission?”

“Because I literally proposed it?” A defensive tone laced my voice.

“Well yeah but you’re just a commander, no offense, and they all just invited you to their club like that?”

“Um, even though it is not protocol, I’m sure an exception was made for this specific mission. I mean, if I were an admiral I don’t think it would have been as big of a deal,” I defend.

“But that’s just it. Your uniform says commander, but your treatment doesn’t,” Locke says.

“Wait, what do you mean,” I ask.

“I’m just saying, if I were you, I wouldn’t just be any old commander anymore. I’d be colonel at least,” Locke scoffs.

“Wait, do you think I should be asking for a promotion,” I ask incredulously.

“It’s up to you, but you’re doing colonel work for commander benefits,” he shrugs.

“Oh wow, Locke, are you looking out for me,” I gush.

“What? No, I’m not,” he says diffusing my teasing.

“Don’t lie to me Locke, it’s not a good look on you,” I push.

“No, I would’ve said the same if Neela were in your shoes,” he defends.

“No you wouldn’t,” Neela responds without looking up from her plate and I laugh.

“Whatever… but it’s ridiculous that they haven’t promoted you already. I would want to be. It’s one step closer to being the Supreme Leader anyways,” he shrugs.

“Oh will you please give that up,” I scoff and he smiles.

“You say that, but–”

“Speaking of the Supreme Leader… what is he like,” Neela asks, her large brown eyes widening even more in wonder. I smile at her, thankful for the subject change, but then it falters when I realize what that new subject is. 

“Um, you know, it’s hard to say,” I respond, my brain scattering for a new change of subject.

“Why’s that? Haven’t you two been spending a lot of time together working on that mission,” Locke asks. Of course his nosy ass wants to know too.

“Um, not as much as you might think. I mean I report to General Hux first and foremost before I ever report to the Supreme Leader. There were a few times I had to talk to him but they were brief and strictly business,” I say, which for the most part is true, at least in a professional context.

“Yeah, but I’m sure being on a mission and flying a cruiser with him would be a lot of time,” Locke provokes and I nearly choke on my water.

“What-what are you talking about,” I ask.

“C’mon don’t play dumb y/n. One of my soldiers was working the hangar the day you all left and he said he saw you embark in a cruiser alone with the Supreme Leader,” Locke confides.

“Did that really happen,” Neela asks with the wonder of a child being read a fairy tale before bed.

“Um, yeah… It did,” I admit and she squeals.

“I wasn’t expecting it though. I thought we would have all flown in one cruiser, altogether, but for some reason they chose to take two,” I divulge.

“Oh my, what was the cruise ride like with him,” Neela asks. I’m not sure if I’m more insulted or concerned at the fact that she cares more about my interactions with Kylo, or grateful for the fact that she isn’t asking about the mission itself and I don’t have to reveal what a failure it really was, well to me. 

“Um, it was fine,” I apprehensively say. 

“That’s it,” Neela asks and Locke looks confused.

“Um, well I guess it was kind of weird, at first,” I say which is partially true.

“How?”

“Well, imagine being in a cruiser alone with the Supreme Leader, it’s so nerve wracking and tense and confusing just being near him,” I say, drawing on my experience when I first started talking to Kylo.

“Yeah, he’s super intimidating,” Locke admits and I cock my head at the most vulnerable thing I’ve ever heard him say.

“Yeah, his presence is just so powerful that he doesn’t have to say a word and you’re already scared,” I relate.

“Wait but you said it was weird ‘at first’, what made things stop being weird,” Neela asks.

“So, well, I mean… I think seeing him so up close and personal and doing something kind of mundane for so long kind of took away some of that intimidation factor a bit. It also helped that I’ve been in cruisers like that with other soldiers before, so it kind of normal in that way. In the beginning, it was a bit weird to see someone like him in that way, but I think it really changed when we were traveling to Korr and hit an asteroid belt. After we passed the halfway point, we reached an unexpected asteroid belt and there were suddenly so many large asteroids all around us and one small one hit the edge of our cruiser. But Ky-The Supreme Leader was really vigilant and weaved the cruiser in and around those crazy stupid space rocks until what felt like hours later but was probably only a few minutes later and we made it out of the belt safe and relatively unharmed. It was so scary, but somehow we were able to laugh about it after so things kind of stopped being weird after that,” I disclosed.

“Oh wow, thank the stars you made it out safely! I haven’t come across an asteroid belt since I was little. They can be so scary,” Neela responds empathetically.

“Yeah, it was but, thanks to him, we made it through,” I respond.

“Wait, did you almost call the Supreme Leader by his name,” Locke asks. Damn it. I felt myself almost say it too, but I hoped no one would notice.

“Oh, um yeah I did. On the mission, outside of duty hours, we were kind of on a first name basis with one another,” I admit, which is true.

“Wow, that’s really weird,” Locke comments.

“Yeah it was,” I laugh.

“Well, I think you and the Supreme Leader look really sweet together,” Neela comments as though we were small animals.

“What,” Locke and I exclaim in unison.

“Girl, you’re talking crazy! What are you talking about,” I try to disguise my surprise and fear in a mask of humor.

“Well, like Locke mentioned, you two are spending a lot of time together,” Neela says.

“I’ve also spent a lot of time with General Hux too, but no one seems to care about him,” I divert.

“Yeah, but he doesn’t look at you the way the Supreme Leader does. Remember that one time our units were doing tactical training in the Room of Recreation?” Neela asks and I nod.

“Well, I know this might sound kind of weird, but during my water break, I saw him approach you and I assumed he probably was talking to you about details for your mission. He removed his helmet to speak with you, which kind of surprised me, but I also figured it might’ve been a respect thing since the mission was kind of putting you closer to his level. And anyways I just remember the two of you were talking and just, you should’ve seen the way he was looking at you, y/n. I mean, there was just this look in his eyes of like, I don’t know, tenderness I guess you could say, whenever he looked at you. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him look like that at all, period, let alone at someone,” Neela observed. 

Holy shit. Neela’s catching on. We’re in big fucking trouble. I have to tell Kylo.

“Oh wow, I hadn’t noticed that at all,” I replied. In truth, I hadn’t noticed. I do know exactly what Neela is talking about and most of our conversation was about the mission but at the end he did sprinkle in a few… personal words, and I had to shut that down so quickly. We were in public and anyone could see us. I hadn’t realized that people were actually watching our every move like that. Oh stars, we need to be more careful.

“I may just be reading into the situation, and it’s probably just the hopeless romantic in me, but I think you would be good together,” Neela sweetly says. My heart yearns for her. Something about her patient brown eyes and honey sweet smile make me wish I could tell her everything. She’s like my galactic little sister. Oh Neela, you don’t even know the half of it.

“She could do better,” Locke criticizes.

“Better than the most powerful man in the Galaxy,” Neela doubted.

“No, better than,” he says, then in a hushed tone adds, “Kylo Ren.” My eyes widen and I scoff in response and suddenly regret my reaction.

“Locke!” I scold. It was always taboo to talk about Kylo Ren in any sort of capacity. Even if he wasn’t the Supreme Leader. Hopefully my reaction conveys that and not my surprise gut-reaction at the fact that Locke doesn’t think my boyfriend isn’t even good enough for me.

“What makes you even say that,” I ask, now genuinely intrigued. No, not just intrigued, there's a burning feeling in the pit of my stomach. Maybe it's rage, but something else is there that I can’t quite put my finger on.

“Every rumor I’ve ever heard about him. The man’s a ticking time bomb bound to explode at any moment,” Locke replied. Kylo’s anger is as well known as the fact that the rebels are our enemy. But I feel so idiotic fighting the urge to reply “But you don’t even know him”. 

“I don’t know if he’s that bad, and besides how can you judge someone based on a rumor that may not even be true,” I reply and can feel Neela side eye me. Please don’t say anything right now, Neela.

“True or not, what kind of person could live with a reputation like that. As a Supreme Leader, I can’t really judge him, but as a person, I don’t think it’s exactly any wonder as to why The First Order’s Emperor hasn’t found an Empress yet,” Locke comments and the burning pit in my stomach releases a hash of fire in me. I need to get out of here before I say anything that’ll get me in trouble.

“I need to go,” I say and leave without a word.

--------------------------------------------------------------

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[itsclydebitches]

To expand on the Ironwood thing, I’m pretty sure there were citizens of Mantle IN ATLAS ALREADY. I think they mention the evacuation was almost done in the show. Don’t quote me on that, I think it was before they told Ironwood in the Schnee Manor.

There were absolutely citizens there already. Yeah, that's a common point fans will bring up if someone tries to paint the situation as Ironwood abandoning Mantle because he considers Atlas to be superior and, therefore, the only city worth saving. Though classism and racism were definitely a part of the Atlas arc (with iffy results), they didn't factor into Ironwood's decision to leave. Only the time limit, Salem's power, the ability to float Atlas (which Mantle doesn't share), and the "many vs. the few" mentality drove his decision. Ironwood never wanted to abandon anyone, but faced with what he saw as certain doom, he was willing to leave a portion of the population behind in order to save the majority. This majority included the city of Atlas, the whole world in a hypothetical sense — if Salem gets the Relics/a Maiden they're all doomed anyway — and yes, an unknown portion of Mantle's population. Based on what we heard in "Gravity" the evacuation wasn't almost complete back then, but it was definitely underway:

Weiss: Why would the general call us back without giving a reason?

Ren: Especially with evacuations still going on in Mantle.

***

Blake: But we're nowhere near finished evacuating everyone! You'd be leaving Mantle to die.

So Mantle citizens were evacuated from "As Above, So Below" (episode 9) when the team first went there to help, through sometime after "Gravity" (episode 11) when Ironwood leaves the RWBY vs. Ace Ops fight to cease evacuations. Idk how long that time frame is and, frankly, it might be hard to figure out given that at the end of the Volume some fans were working to figure out how much time had passed based on dialogue vs. sunsets and sunrises and it... wasn't matching up well. Regardless, even if we could say precisely how long had passed, we still don't know the speed of the evacuation and how many made it. What does "nowhere near finished" actually mean? Do we trust Blake's assessment here? We just don't know, but we do know many did make it. To me, that's as important as remembering that many were going to be left behind.

This was always a trolley problem where either option ultimately sucked. Ironwood chose pragmatism and put his efforts towards saving who he thought he feasibly could, from both Mantle and Atlas, making a morally horrific compromise in order to do that. The fandom has largely ignored those aspects in order to paint it as a simplistic, "Ironwood ran away to save the rich, racist elite because he's just awful" reading, even though there's nothing to support that in the show. (Well, outside of systematic problems like the rich city inevitably being the one that receives the magical object that would someday lead to their home being the lifeboat... but that's a level of commentary RWBY isn't even aware of, let alone weaving into its narrative.) These takes don't just break down because Mantle citizens were already on Atlas, but because Atlas citizens were in Mantle too. This isn't a situation where the two cities are forcibly divided, each staying on their respective sides. They're the same Kingdom, interconnected, and the idea that all the rich were on Atlas when Salem attacked and all the poor on Mantle is absurd. RWBY does little to flesh the Kingdom out, but we have at least two concrete examples to point to. In her flashback, Cinder is a literal slave staying in the opulent Atlas hotel. At the start of Volume 7, Pietro is the head Atlas scientist running a shop down in Mantle. Everyone is already mixed up with Ironwood trying to bring as many people up to the city as possible, regardless of where they to live, or who else was already in the city. Evacuations stopped because Salem herself announced that she'd arrived to kill them all and no one could come up with a plan other than running.

"Simply accept the futility of your situation and this can all be over."

Ironwood accepted that he couldn't beat Salem now, so he took steps to try and ensure that the world had a chance to beat her later. That included keeping the war resources out of her hands and saving as many people from his Kingdom as he could without endangering the whole, regardless of where they came from. The classism and racism, though it easily could have been a factor in this decision, weren't. Or if they were, they existed entirely off screen like the semblance that had, supposedly, wrested control of Ironwood's willpower.

[theres-an-impulstor-among-us]

I know you wrote a drabble where Scott is almost sacrificed at Dogwarts and wanted to ask if you could write a version of that where he actually is sacrificed.

okay so this one is an alternate ending to this one, so it’ll start off the same and branch out into a different ending. read it first/save it for after if you want a happier version lol

author’s note: due to my severe discomfort surrounding decapitation, i’ve altered the method of killing slightly

lives at the start of this fic: Jimmy - red, Scott - green, Ren - red, Etho - yellow, Martyn - green

cw: blood, strangulation

just a reminder: please do not tag as shipping :)

…

Scott is starting to regret letting the Dogwarts trio take him and Jimmy back to their base, but he can’t exactly back out now. It’s his own fault, really, for asking if there’s anything else he can do to support Dogwarts from a distance, rather than putting up their banner.

He shoots a sideways glance at Jimmy, who seems even more nervous than him. Scott resists the urge to reach out and take his hand.

Finally, they arrive at Dogwarts. Scott is more than worried to see that a new platform with torches surrounding it on all four corners has sprung up in the middle of the carrot field. It looks innocent enough but something about it gives it an ominous vibe.

Unfortunately, this is exactly where Ren leads Scott.

“What is this?” Scott asks warily, putting one foot on the step up.

“This is the Altar of the Black Heart,” responds Ren ominously. “For Dogwarts to truly achieve full power, it requires a sacrifice. The blood of an outsider.”

Scott’s eyes widen as he realises what this means. “Whoa, whoa, hold on a second!”

He backs away a few steps but bumps into Etho, who takes hold of him in a surprisingly strong grip.

Jimmy starts forward with a gasp but Martyn grabs him and pushes him down, holding him in place. “Scott!” Jimmy cries uselessly.

Ren stands on the hill just above the altar as Etho drags Scott into place and tries to hold him down. Scott struggles against Etho’s grip, causing Etho to backhand him across the face.

“LEAVE HIM ALONE!” Jimmy screams. “SCOOOOOOTT!”

Blood trickling out the corner of his mouth, Scott coughs and tries to fend Etho off again.

“I’d stop resisting if I were you, Scott,” comes Martyn’s cold voice.

Scott glances over at him. His heart freezes as he finds Martyn holding a sword to Jimmy’s neck. “No!” he gasps. “Don’t!”

“Then hold still.”

After a moment, Scott squeezes his eyes shut and falls still, letting Etho push him to his hands and knees in the centre of the altar.

“Scott…!” croaks Jimmy. “No…!”

Scott forces himself to meet Jimmy’s terrified gaze. “It’ll be okay, Jimmy,” he whispers, just loud enough for Jimmy to hear. “Just stay strong for me, okay? Stay strong.”

“A sacrifice must be made!” announces Ren, spreading his arms to the skies. “Do the honours, Etho.”

Etho nods and raises his axe.

Jimmy looks away, starting to hyperventilate. He can’t watch this.

Scott closes his eyes.

The axe comes down hard and buries itself in the small of Scott’s back, the tip piercing his heart and killing him instantly.

Smajor1995 was slain by Etho

Jimmy starts to scream and doesn’t stop. His eyes are fixed on the spot his husband just was seconds before, tears streaming down his face. Tears of terror, of grief, of anger.

Something snaps inside him.

“Take Solidarity to the dungeon,” Ren orders. “We’ll deal with him later.”

But as Martyn starts to move, Jimmy reacts lightning fast and kicks him in the stomach with unbelievable strength. Martyn staggers back in shock and pain, allowing Jimmy to snatch his sword and slice cut after cut in his former friend’s body, not stopping despite the screams. His lust for blood has finally been awakened and he WILL avenge his husband.

InTheLittleWood was slain by SolidarityGaming

He spins round to find Etho charging at him with the axe that had killed Scott. Seeing his husband’s blood still dripping down the blade sends Jimmy completely over the edge.

His swing has so much force behind it that it knocks the axe cleanly out of Etho’s hand. Before Etho can recover, Jimmy shoves him to the ground and kneels on his chest, his hands wrapped around Etho’s throat. His eyes are so flaming red that they’re practically glowing, teeth bared in an animal-like snarl.

THIS is the person who killed his husband. Jimmy will make him pay.

Someone is trying to pull him off Etho but the bloodlust increases a red lifer’s strength and stamina, and they can’t budge him. The smell of blood is making Jimmy dizzy and disoriented, but all he knows is that he wants to kill. No, he NEEDS to kill. His desire to maim and murder is so strong that it’s all-consuming, growing inside him like lava escaping a volcano, rising up until it’s about to explode outwards and destroy everything in its path.

“STOP!” Ren’s voice yells desperately.

Jimmy doesn’t. He can sense that Etho is almost dead, and every instinct in his body is driving him forward to finish the job.

“Jimmy!”

This voice causes Jimmy to freeze and slowly release Etho, blinking against his red vision as he looks around wildly for its owner.

A hand touches his shoulder, then hugs him from behind. The cool, smooth arms… the scent of strawberries… the gentle heartbeat…

“S-Scott?” Jimmy croaks.

“It’s me, Jimmy,” whispers Scott. “I’m here.”

Jimmy slowly turns around and finds Scott’s face looking back at him. It… It really is him.

He pulls Scott into a tight hug, clutching him like his life depends on it. All the pain and anger and terror melts away, leaving only love.

Still holding Jimmy tightly, Scott carefully moves him away from Ren and a freshly-yellow Martyn as they dash to the semi-conscious Etho’s side.

“We’re even,” he says firmly. “A life for a life. There’s no need for further bloodshed.”

Ren glares back at him, but his expression softens slightly as he registers what Scott’s saying. “Really? You’d be satisfied leaving it like this?”

“Well, of course we’d still be enemies,” responds Scott. “But I want to call a temporary truce. I don’t want anyone else to die, not even any of you.”

After a moment, Ren glances over at his right hand man. “It’s your call, Martyn. You’re the one who died.”

Martyn considers Scott’s words on his own for a moment, before glancing up and happening to make eye contact with Jimmy. All traces of the bloodlust in Jimmy’s gaze are gone, replaced only with the eyes of the person Martyn used to be close friends with all those years ago.

“I accept your olive branch,” he says.

Ren nods and addresses Scott and Jimmy: “Then you two may leave this place in peace.”

“Come, Jimmy,” Scott murmurs. “Let’s go, quickly. Before they change their mind.”

Jimmy dithers as Scott takes hold of his hand and starts pulling him towards the exit. “S-Sorry, Etho,” he says awkwardly. “Sorry, Martyn.”

“Come on.”

Scott practically drags Jimmy to the gate and out of Dogwarts, only slowing down once their walls start to appear in front of them. Jimmy stays silent, letting his husband lead him.

Finally, they get into their base, which is where Jimmy takes the lead and pulls Scott into the former’s house, shutting the door for privacy.

“Jimmy, what-,” Scott starts.

“Let me see the scar,” says Jimmy seriously. “Please.”

After a moment, Scott turns around and lifts up the back of his shirt. A clean, straight mark running down his back shows Jimmy exactly where the axe entered his body. He gently traces the line with the tips of his fingers.

“I told you this would happen,” he says hoarsely. “I said they’d do this to you but you didn’t listen!”

Scott huffily pulls down his shirt and takes a few steps away. “I know, Jimmy. TRUST ME, I know! You’re just lucky they decided to go for the green lifer, not the red.”

“LUCKY?!” cries Jimmy. “Did you SEE me back there?! I murdered Martyn and nearly choked the life out of Etho!”

“Yeah, I did! I set my spawn right outside the walls before we went in and it’s lucky I did or you might’ve kept going and gotten yourself killed in the process! I can’t believe fear for your own life is what finally triggered your bloodlust.”

“What?!” Jimmy stares at him with wide eyes. “You think THAT’s what happened?”

Scott frowns at Jimmy’s reaction. “Well… I DID, but…”

“There’s a reason I’ve stayed back and tried not to get involved in any of your stupid conflicts, you know! I NEVER wanted to kill. EVER. But when they sacrificed you right in front of me, I felt the desire to rip Martyn and Etho apart like a predator with its prey. THAT’s what triggered my bloodlust, Scott! They killed you and I wanted them to suffer like they made you suffer!” Jimmy’s voice breaks and he dissolves into tears. “My bloodlust was triggered by the need to avenge you. And to make sure they never hurt you again.”

His heart breaking, Scott pulls Jimmy into another hug, letting him cry into his shoulder. “I’m so sorry,” he murmurs. “I never considered how traumatic that whole thing must’ve been for you. How are you holding up?”

Jimmy coughs, trying to clear his throat. “B-Better now. Please promise me we won’t ever go there again, though.”

Scott rubs Jimmy’s back soothingly, feeling Jimmy’s heart still pounding in his chest.

“I promise.”

[that-sw-writer]

Omg plz write a part 2 of Hux’s sister

Ask and ye shall receive!

PART ONE

Word count: 2272

Warnings: none, but again just a bit of a crack fic

Sibling Rivalry II

"What's that?" Armitage asked, in a judgemental tone.

"What's what?" You innocently replied.

"That." He pointed towards your neck, where you knew there was an inconcealable hickey sitting just below your jawline.

"You know exactly what that is Armitage, or would you rather I announce to the entire bridge that Supreme Leader Ren-"

"No. That's quite enough." He hastily interrupted you, the bitterness evident in his tone.

It had been almost a year since you transferred to The Supremacy, and a lot had changed in that time. Namely, Supreme Leader Snoke had died in... mysterious circumstances, and Kylo Ren had taken his place - much to your brother's dismay. You were the only person who Ren had trusted with the truth: that he had been the one to kill his ex-master. But you weren't complaining, dating the Supreme Leader certainly had its perks.

He allowed you to take his place as Commander, a job which required a lot less admin than being a Lieutenant. Plus, admittedly, you did tend to get away with missing deadlines more than the average First Order officer.

Whilst things had only gotten better for you, they had gone the opposite way for your brother. He spent his days expressing his hatred of Kylo to you, hoping that it would perhaps spur you to break up with him. But he was well aware that so long as the two of you were together, his life and job weren't at risk.

"Speak of the devil," Armitage grumbled under his breath as Ren walked onto the bridge, every officer in the vicinity immediately standing to attention. All except you and your brother who merely watched him as he approached.

"Be nice." You hissed, your attention immediately turning to Kylo as he approached you both.

"I need to talk to you." He addressed you, immediately giving your brother a pointed look which read 'leave us alone.'

With a reluctant sigh, Armitage said: "very well, I'm spending this evening with Millicent anyway."

After you had watched him depart, your gaze trailed back to Kylo, who forced himself to tear his own eyes away from the mark he had left on your neck.

"Who's Millicent?" He suddenly asked.

"His cat." You slowly replied, wondering why he cared.

Kylo let out a sharp, deep, laugh, "he has a cat? I thought it was a woman."

This time you let out a cackle, "a woman? All the times he said he was going to play with Millicent what the fuck did you think he meant?" You kept your voice down, away from prying ears.

"I just imagine that's how he speaks about women." He shrugged, but at that very moment, an idea hit you.

"Millicent... a woman." You muttered as the cogs turned in your brain, "his wife." You laughed as the idea formed.

"What?" Kylo looked at you, utterly confused.

"Nothing, just thinking of new ways to make Armitage's life difficult." You smirked, "anyway, what did you need to talk to me about?"

"I'll be off base for a while, I shouldn't be gone longer than two rotations." He told you, very matter-of-factly.

You nodded, quite used to watching him come and go on various missions. You knew that you would be the one coordinating things from aboard The Supremacy. "Okay, just stay safe." You told him, knowing that he absolutely wouldn't heed that warning - he never did.

"I will." He replied, just to keep your mind at ease. Leaning in, he captured your lips in a brief kiss, being Supreme Leader meant that he had grown tired of caring who knew about your relationship. Nobody had any power to stop him.

In Kylo's absence, you would simply have to distract yourself by spreading some completely untrue rumours about your brother around the base.

><><><><><><><><><

"Y/N..." You could hear the snarl in Armitage's voice as he pulled you aside on your way to the bridge.

"What can I do for you, Armitage?" You gave him an innocent grin, knowing exactly what had him so worked up.

"Tell me why when I speak about Millicent, people seem to think I'm referring to my wife."  He snapped, and you stifled a laugh.

"I'm not sure, maybe you need to work on your communication skills. After all, constantly referring to her as Millicent rather than 'my cat' can be very misleading."

"The AS division are all calling me a 'toxic husband,' because I keep my wife locked up all day and night!" He exclaimed, the frustration evident in his tone at becoming a laughing stock. You cracked at that, a loud cackle escaping your lips. This gossip spreading truly couldn't have gone better.

"Amazing," you said as your laughter died down, "absolutely amazing."

Spreading that rumour had been easy, you had made a simple suggestion to Captain Phasma along the lines of 'isn't it so weird how General Hux always talks about this Millicent woman but nobody's ever seen her?' And from there, it had spread like wildfire.

With no contact from Kylo since he had left, investing yourself in spreading gossip at your brother's expense had been the perfect way to stop yourself from worrying. Besides, he was due back that very day, so the timing couldn't have been better.

After Armitage finished scolding you to no end, you both went to the bridge to receive an update from Kylo's team. Usually, he would contact you over the comms with the number of injured and deceased troopers so you could have the med-bay prepare accordingly. This mission had just been recon, so you weren't expecting any issues.

"Commander Hux, come in." A different voice spoke to you over the comms today, and you immediately wondered why it wasn't the Supreme Leader speaking to you.

"I'm here-" you responded, "go ahead." You didn't want to make a big fuss about Kylo not being the one to contact you, especially not with Armitage at your side - he would never let you hear the end of it.

"Despite complications, the mission was a success." The voice crackled over the comm.

"What complications?" Your heart involuntarily started racing as your mind thought of every worst-case scenario.

"They knew we were coming ma'am and we were met with heavy fire, but we managed to escape. Plenty of minor injuries, two will need medical attention, and one deceased." He formally spoke, but you were barely listening anymore. Kylo not having been in touch was worrying enough, but this was the icing on the cake. You simply turned to Armitage, and he could read your expression, so he took over.

"This is General Hux. We will prepare the med-bay." He curtly said, cutting the comm off before you could ask the question plaguing your mind.

"It won't be him." Your brother said, "as much as I wish it would be." He then grumbled, which was met by a hard elbow from you.

"But what if it is?" You stressed, "he usually contacts me, but this time I've heard nothing!"

"Just... sit down." He suggested, unsure of what else to say. Part of Armitage was praying that Ren was the one casualty on the mission, but he also didn't want his little sister to have her heart broken. Truly a catch-22 for him.

"No, I'm not 'sitting down,' Armitage!" You exclaimed, beginning to pace. "I'll tell you what, if he walks off that transport as if nothing has happened then I'm going to make him the second casualty of the mission for stressing me out like this."

"I think you're being a bit dramatic." He tried to console you.

"You're only saying that because you're praying that he's not coming back." You grumbled.

"That's a fair accusation." He admitted, "but as much as it pains me to say, I know Ren means a lot to you, even if I can't begin to fathom what you see in him." At this point he was practically speaking through gritted teeth - Maker out of everyone in the First Order his sister could have fallen for, it had to be his arch-nemesis.

"I'm going to go and tell the med-bay to prepare." You huffed before leaving the bridge. You needed to distract yourself from this pit of worry that was opening up in your stomach. Surely you were just overthinking things, but considering the circumstances, you couldn't help yourself. Part of you hated how much you cared about Kylo because you didn't like feeling this dependent on him.

Just to try and help lift your mood you were sure to perpetuate the rumour about your brother and Millicent on your way down to the med-bay. A group of troopers had been quietly discussing whether there was any truth behind it or not, and as the General's sister it was your solemn duty to confirm the rumour

"Yeah it's crazy, Millicent is my sister in law and I don't think I've seen her since the wedding." You whispered to them as you went by, trying your best not to break out into laughter on the spot. If anything was going to take your mind off worrying about Kylo, it was definitely going to be making Armitage's life just that bit more miserable.

Whilst you were on your way to tell the med-bay to prepare, Armitage was left on the bridge, which meant that when the ship returned from the mission he begrudgingly had to go to the hanger to greet them instead of you.

As the boarding ramp lowered he found himself genuinely wondering if Ren was going to be the singular casualty. He knew he was being ridiculous thinking it, but your panicking had clouded his judgement a bit.

To Armitage's dismay, but likely your relief, Kylo was the first person to leave the craft. He looked filthy, a few cuts littering his face and his robes dirtied from battle. The Supreme Leader was used to seeing you when he returned from a mission, and being greeted by your brother left him with a scowl on his face.

"What are you doing here?" He grumbled.

"Lovely to see you alive Supreme Leader." Armitage sneered in response, "although if you don't talk to my sister soon I doubt you'll be alive much longer."

"Spare me the empty threats General, we both know you couldn't kill me if you tried." He waved his hand in dismissal as he walked past Armitage.

"Perhaps. But this time it's not me you need to be worried about." He called after Kylo, who turned around with his brow furrowed.

"Y/N?" He knew that perhaps not contacting you for the entire duration of the mission wasn't his best idea, and now he was already regretting it.

"She's not happy." Your brother plainly responded as he walked back towards Ren.

"Has she got those brow lines she gets when she's angry?"

"She'll most definitely have them when she finds out you're alive." Armitage grimaced, "I'd tread carefully if I was you."

"Fuck." Kylo swore under his breath when he saw you approaching.

Now stood next to Ren, Armitage whispered up to him, "whatever you do, just don't make her any angrier for both of our sakes."

"You-" your finger was immediately pointing directly in Kylo's face as you stormed over, "you're going to be the death of me, you know that? I hear nothing from you, then suddenly there's a casualty on the mission! But here you are as if nothing happened."

"I'm sorry." He said. Openly apologising was such a rarity for Kylo that it made you stop dead in your tracks.

"Come again?" You couldn't quite believe your ears.

"I said I'm sorry. I should have contacted you." He was so calm that you found your rage dissipating. Any kind of apology from Kylo was a victory.

"Then I guess you're off the hook." Your expression now changing to a more teasing one.

"What?" Armitage exclaimed, "you can't let him off that easily!"

"Why not?" You raised an eyebrow at him, knowing that he was just hoping to keep you angry at Kylo for as long as possible.

"I don't know, you just can't!" He grumbled.

"Go and feed your wife Armitage, she's been alone all day." You said, purposely loudly so people would overhear you, and he immediately went red in the face.

"She's my cat!" He practically yelled the word but nevertheless went storming off. "One day you'll break up with him, mark my words!" He called as he departed, giving up on caring who was around to hear.

"At this rate Armitage, he's more likely to become your brother in law!" You knew there were absolutely no plans of marriage, but you couldn't miss the opportunity for humour.

Kylo snorted from beside you, "I doubt we'd do much family bonding."

"He'd probably try and kill you in your sleep." You laughed.

"'Try' being the key word." Kylo paused for a moment before he pulled you into his arms, but before he kissed you he paused, "his cat being his wife?"

"I got bored, spread a rumour, the usual." You shrugged, before leaning in to close the gap between your lips. You didn't care that he was dirtied from his mission, you were just relieved to have him back.

"And another thing-" Armitage interrupted you both as he stormed back over, no doubt with a witty insult to hurl at Ren. Your lips parted so you could both stare it him with deadpan expressions, whereas he just looked disgusted. "Why do you insist on these displays in public? I don't want to see it."

"All the more reason to do it." Kylo smirked and pulled you back in for a kiss.

[placebogirl7]

One relationship that I don’t see many talk about is the one between Takumi and Ren. I always found it pretty interesting. They don’t seem like real friends but they don’t dislike each other either. Almost everyone in the band is afraid of Takumi, even Narita who is his boss but Ren has no problem telling Takumi out on his bullshit. I find the conversations between them very interesting tbh and we find out quite a lot of what Takumi thinks. Ex when they are in the break room after he announced he was gonna get married and when Takumi is driving Ren back to his place. What I really hate is that Takumi never really did anything to help Ren with his addiction. It was only after Ren wanted to quit that he brought up rehab. He only cared for the band and not the actual members. What are your thought on their relationship?

Hello anon!

Sorry for the late reply but work and other personal life shits are killing me these last days! @-@ I needed time to answer to your question because it’s interesting and there’s a lot to say about. I agree with you, despite as I said many time I don’t appreciate Takumi (even if his character has been described so well by Ai Yazawa), I find interesting the relationship he had with Ren. I also agree that they don’t seem to be friends for real (at lest not if he compare the relationship Ren has with Yasu) but of course they get along well (otherwise they couldn’t be in the same band and Ren would have left Trapnest before like the other 3 guitarist did before him).  I guess some people in Cookie staff were afraid of Takumi’s bad temperament, other were just respectful because he understood a lot about music industry and he could manage things better than anyone else (I mean Narita was so usless compared to Takumi that they could have exchanged their roles XD). Some people was afraid to lose their jobs they had families to sustain, and since Takumi had the power to make them lose their job they didn’t say anything even if they didn’t agree with his way of acting or thinking. Ren, on the other hand, just wanted to play the guitar and do what he loved. I guess that he also knew that Takumi would have never fired him because he and Reira were the stars of the band and the songs he wrote were great, so he would have lost a too precious person: this is also demonstrated by the fact that Takumi had never fired Ren despite his drug addiction could have put all the band at risk.  I noticed too that Takumi opened up himself everytime he talked to Ren, but I don’t know if he did that because he trusted Ren or because he felt that Ren was the only one who wouldn’t have judged him even if he didn’t agree with his opinion or what he did. 

I liked those conversations you mentioned too, they are full of meanings. When they talked after Reira run away from the recording studio, Ren tried to make Takumi finally face the problem that he had tried to ignore for years (which is Reira loving him so much) and he tried to give him advices to avoid to disband Trapnest. I admit the advices Ren gave him were actually morally questionable (even Takumi noticed it and was surprised about it) since he suggested Takumi to have sex with Reira and marry her, because marrying the famous singer princess would have bring him more business that marrying an uknown girl, but Ren justified this saying that he was giving him advices that he would have been the only one able to follow, considering how much cold and willing to do anything he was. I’m not sure if Ren in that moment was just trying to help Takumi to find a solution or if he wanted to help Reira get what she wanted. Takumi on the other hand blamed Ren to be exactly like him, since he abandoned his girlfriend and friends to be famous. Ren didn’t understand Takumi’s words at first, but then when Takumi explained it better Ren realized he was right. Look at Ren’s face in the last image of the panel below: his look is sad despite he’s smiling.

The conversation they had in the ar was even more deeper than this one, maybe even because of Ren’s drug addiction which wasn’t under control anymore or because Reira and Takumi’s relationship was crackling. Takumi coldly admitted that he was going to Reira’s because even that was “part of his work”. This was Ren’s answer:

So, Ren perfectly knew that Takumi considered all his bandmates and staff as soldiers who have to fight on his side, but he also knew that his plan was so wrong and he was going to deceive Reira pretending to give her something he couldn’t: his love. Looking at their faces in the next panel, you can say how much they both knew this and how much they were sorry (maybe the first Takumi was sorry about the shit he made):

There’s also something in defence of Takumi’s in this conversation, something that surprised Ren too: the fact that despite he was doing something wrong he hoped Hachi and their daughter to be happy. It’s the first time he showed openly his affection. 

I hate too that Takumi didn’t do anything to help Ren with his addiction. But as we said and Ren himself said and Takumi admitted, he saw his bandmates and staff as a platoon. All he did was for Reira, people around him were just pawns on a chessboard that he moved in order to realize the plan he had for Reira. He became a musician for Reira, he created Trapnest for Reira, he sacrificed himself for Reira. No one was important apart from her (but in the end he did a huge mistake with her too, not treating her like he should have done).  Actually Takumi didn’t think about a real rehab even when Ren told him he wanted to quit Trapnest to not put the band at risk. He just told him “You can’t go to the hospital or to a rehab center, you have to stay at home and quit by yourself”. REALLY??? How can you say this to a person who clearly needs a professional help because he’s destroying himself and he can’t just stay at home alone and convince himself that he doesn’t need drug anymore while the withdrawal kill him??? When Ren admitted he wasn’t confident to be so strong to manage to quit by himself, Takumi just did a face that if I could have been in the manga too I would have punched him until he died, litterally. He seemed to find his words like bullshit while Ren was actually suffering so much...

But again, he couldn’t let Ren leave Trapnest nor he could let him go to the hospital with the risk that paparazzi would have found out the truth and created a scandal which would have destroyed Trapnest. Trapnest must live for Reira’s sake, because without Trapnest Reira was anything. That’s why he cared so much for the band and not about the actual members (apart from Reira). He only realized his mistake when Ren died and Reira lost her mind and stopped to sing. I guess that if Reira would have continued to sing, he wouldn’t have mind to replace Ren in Trapnest, even if that night when Ren told him he wanted to quit he did all he could to convince him not to do that. 

So yeah, my opinion on their relationship is the same you have :) They were bandmates, they get along well but they weren’t actually real friends, otherwise they would have acted differently with each other. They would have been more helpful. I mean, Takumi’s attempt to convince Ren to quit on drugs isn’t comparable at all with Yasu’s. Yasu yelled at Ren but then, when he saw his fragility, he just put an hand to Ren’s shoulder and told him to stop forcing himself to be like him or Takumi, since he wasn’t. On the other hand, Takumi thought Ren was like him or wanted to be like him. He never truly understood Ren’s real attitude, because he didn’t care like he didn’t care about all the others except for Reira. 

Thank you so much for asking! <3 

[anotheronechicagobog]

Bulletproofness and Playing God Jay Halstead x reader

written by: @anotheronechicagobog​

requested by @confusedpimp​, I hope you like it!

warnings: swearing, addiction, Hannah Asher is NOT porprayed well in this you have been warned, malpractice, emergency c-section complications, involves Chicago Med episode ‘Do No Harm’, police being idiots and assholes, warrants served incorrectly, drugs, drug dealers, bad neighbourhood created by systematic oppression and gentrification, Will is a prick with issues, and canon compliant violence

A/N: I am very sympathetic and supportive of people who have addictions because not only are there a tone of genetic factors that weigh in on it, but environmental factors that most people have very little to no control over. That being said, I am strongly against people with addictions working in healthcare, first responding, and/or law enforcement who spend most of their time with vulnerable people who don’t have much of a choice about whether to trust them or not. If someone works in an area where they have someone’s life in their hands they cannot be addicted to a substance that will control their ability to make judgements, affect how/their ability to work, and function as a whole.

In the past eight months, a warrant has been served to your apartment twenty-one times. You haven’t done anything wrong, the name on the warrants was always for your upstairs neighbour, did this make being woken up and the fucking crack of dawn and being interrogated (sometimes arrested) any easier? Not even a fucking bit. So you weren’t surprised when at 3:28 am, your door was busted open (again), heard shouts of “Chicago PD!” (again), and heard your house being “cleared” (again). You groaned and sat up, holding your hands up. Your bedroom door was thrown open with a bang. “I am unarmed, Marcus Evans lives in the apartment upstairs, and I have no association to him.” In the blandest voice possible, you recited the statement the legal aid at your university wrote you. “Uh... Sorry? Hey, Sarg, I think I’ve figured out why there were so many unsuccessful warrants on this place.” The blonde man was still pointing a gun at your head, but more members of his unit came to surround him.   

“Can I put my hands down now? I have documents that prove I am innocent, that the warrant was served to the wrong address, again, and that the only connection I have to Marcus Evans is that he is my annoying upstairs neighbour.”

They all sheepishly looked at you. The Latina woman spoke up, “the apartment is clear of anything even remotely illegal. Well, aside from the power lines attached to her box outside that show that her neighbours have been stealing power and internet from her.”

‘Sarg’, an older man with silver hair with a surprised look on his face nodded. “Alright, put ‘em down and get us the papers.”

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Despite all the evidence that the warrant wasn’t meant for you, they still insisted on taking you down to the station. You refused since they couldn’t arrest you and had no grounds to hold you on, and Sergeant Voight did not like that. “I’m too tired to give a shit about what you want. I have three jobs, student loans, and university to deal with. The only things of value in my apartment are my crappy laptop and internet access. The only time I am ever here is to sleep. You already disturbed what little sleep I was able to get, and I have work in... Forty-five minutes. Just great. Please leave, and can one of you, for the love of all things holy put a note in the system that this is NOT Marcus Evans’ apartment?!” Everyone flinched at your outburst, all looking both sympathetic and annoyed except for Detective Halstead, he just looked very sad for you. “Of course,” he said as he handed you a business card, “if you could call me when you have time, we have some pretty important questions.” Sargent Voight shot him a look, one that clearly said ‘what the fuck are you doing? That’s not your call.’ “Okay. Now seriously, please leave.” Irritated and muttering under their breath, barring Halstead who gave you a smirk and a wink, they all left stepping over the splinters of the door you replaced three weeks before.

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The next day after entering your sparsely decorated apartment, dropping dead on your bed/couch, you heard the distinctive sounds of a door being broken down, followed by the police announcing themselves, and an apartment being searched... Above yours. They finally got the right apartment! Despite the ache in your muscles and bones, you jumped up and cheered. Complete and utter elation surrounded you and your soul. A few minutes into your dancing and celebrating there was a knock on the door. Smiling brighter than you had in years you answered the door. “Good morning detective!”

“Well, good morning to you too, Ms. Y/L/N. You’re in a much better mood.”

“To be fair, you guys busted into my apartment at three in the morning, again, and I just heard everything that happened upstairs, you guys finally got the right apartment!”

“Hey, we never served more than one warrant here.”

“Your unit only served one, but your brothers in blue served twenty-one. Destroying property, unlawful arrest, causing severe anxiety, and just general harassment for eight months. The only reason I didn’t move was because I couldn’t afford to. I’m just happy it’s over now, I’ll never have a  Marcus Evans warrant served at my apartment again!” Halstead looked happy when you opened the door and your conversation began, but when you finally took a breath you noticed how guilty he looked. “I’m sorry.” He whispered, looking like he was in physical pain, before he nodded at you and walked away, leaving you feeling incredibly confused.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two days later you returned from two ten-hour shifts to Jay Halstead in front of your door. “Detective?”

“Please, call me Jay.”

“Alright, Jay, what are you doing here? Is everything okay with Marcus’s arrest?”

“Oh yeah, everything’s fine with that. I came here because of this.” He handed you a large manilla envelope. “What’s this?”

“Compensation. For everything that happened over the last eight months. And apartment listings in better neighbourhoods. Seriously, you need to get out of here, it’s way too dangerous.”

“Thanks for the advice, and the compensation, I’ll think about it. But it just might not be doable for me.”

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You couldn’t afford to move, something that irked Jay to no end. So he came around often. Dropping by with coffee and Irish breakfasts. Sharing his Netflix password and watching B99 together. Driving you home from work or university when it was late. The days grew shorter, and your hours of work grew longer. Jay worried. About you. About the number of hours you worked. About how much university work you had. About your health, how much (or little, really) you slept and ate, how you didn’t see the doctor as often you should (ironic considering you were in med school), and about how you never took time to relax, always jumping from one task to the next. 

You slumped against the passenger seat of Jay’s truck, exhausted after working for thirty hours straight, ten at each of your jobs. “Okay, seriously, you can’t keep living like this. I have a spare room, I can get you a civilian job at my precinct. You are wearing yourself to the bone. Please, Y/N.”

“I get my residency assignment tomorrow. I quit today.”

“You did?”

“Yes.”

“All of them?”

“All three.”

“And you’ll move out of your apartment?”

“Nope.” Popping the ‘p’. Jay sighed and shook his head, before looking at your half-asleep form. “I’ll take you to the shithole you call a home.”

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TWO YEARS LATER

Jumping up and down you waited for Jay to open the door. The envelopes sitting on his coffee table glaring at you. You flopped onto his couch (that didn’t also double as a bed) and huffed impatiently. Fidgeting.

The door opened and you jumped up, startling your best friend. His cop/ranger instincts taking over. He stiffly dropped his jacket and yanked out his gun before aiming it for your head. Panic coursed through you, tightening your chest. Reflexively you put up your hands, not able to control the words that bubbled out of your throat. “I’m bulletproof... But please don’t shoot me.” Jay lowered his gun, laughing. “‘Bulletproof’? Really?”

“Hey, I panicked, shut up.”

“What’re you doing here, anyway? I thought you were taking another shift?”

“I was, but then Sarah’s plans fell through so she decided to take her shift back, plus I got my fellowship applications back!”

“Where did you get accepted?!”

“I don’t know I was waiting for you to get back to open them!”

“Well I’m here now, so open them!” 

“Okay, okay, here we go; Honolulu general, accepted, Seattle Grace, no, but they had a bomb blow up there recently so I’m not heartbroken, Chicago med, yes, and Miami Dade Memorial, yes. Okay 3/4, that’s great! What do you think?”

“Well I’m biased, so Chicago Med, but it would be fun to visit you in Hawaii.” 

“Hawaii is so expensive though, I’d probably have to have a part-time job to make rent.”

“In a decent apartment this time.”

“Two part-time jobs, then. So Hawaii is out, now Miami... It is hot there, beaches, the ocean, the food, but Miami Dade Memorial isn’t very prominent in the research department and the crime rate is awful in the part I’d need to live and work in. I mean I know isn’t a whole lot better but... It would feel a bit like moving from bad to worse, especially on my budget.”

“So that leaves Chicago...”

“It does, but I think I need to find a new place that’s closer to Med and filled with less dug dealers.”

“Please tell me this was a subtle way of asking if you can move in with me.”

“It wasn’t, but now that you bring it up, would that be okay?”

“YES! Oh thank fuck, you’re finally moving out of that rat’s nest! C’mon, let’s go get your stuff now!”

“But Jay I just paid this month’s rent-“

“Let’s gooooooooooo!”

——————————————————————————————————-

FOUR MONTHS LATER

Because your apartment was in such a “great location” (in the same building as three drug dealers) your landlord was willing to give half of your rent back. It had only taken you twenty-something minutes to pack your things and leave. Now you were starting your surgical OB/GYN fellowship, excited to not be working multiple jobs at once for the first time since you were twelve. While Jay’s brother, Will, worked at Med as well he worked in the ED while you worked in the gynecology unit and you were thankful you only had to work together for consults or in an all hands on deck situation because he could be a fucking prick. When you first met him years ago he spent two hours quizzing your medical knowledge, and he got annoyed when you got everything right and he couldn’t correct you. So when you got a consult from him your first week there, you were apprehensive. “Hey Y/N, treatment room four.”

“Thanks, Maggie.” You pushed back the curtain and were met with the sight of a pregnant woman clearly in immense pain and a frustrating ginger. “Dr. Asher is her OB but we can’t find her anywhere. She was on-call but I, and a couple of nurses, and her secretary have been blowing up her phone and we’ve got nothing back. This is her patient Sienna. She’s in a lot of pain but is refusing painkillers, you’ve been working with her a lot lately-“ You snorted. His facial expression hardened. “Just come out and say it Y/L/N.”

“First of all it’s doctor Y/L/N, second of all, I haven’t been ‘working’ with her, I’ve been taking care of ‘her’ patients because she’s almost never at work. She just cancels the appointments short notice and since these women are kind of on a timeline their appointments get reassigned to other doctors. She’s listed as their doctor on all the forms but she’s never even met half of them. Sienna is the only patient that Dr. Asher has seen more than once.” 

“Don’t talk about her like that, you don’t know-“

“That she’s an addict? The entire OB floor knows we just don’t have enough proof to do anything about it. And don’t get me wrong, I know that there’s a lot of genetic components to addiction and I would be sympathetic if she wasn’t responsible for multiple lives at a time on a daily basis.” You turned on your heel and entered the room, done with Will Halstead and his bullshit. “Hi Sienna, my name is Dr. Y/N Y/L/N, and I’ll be filling in for Dr. Asher, I understand that you don’t want any drugs and while that’s fine, if your condition gets bad enough we may have to intervene but we’ll do everything we can for you and your baby, okay?”

“Where’s Dr. Asher? I need her here, she understands!”

“Okay, we’re still trying to find her okay?”

—————————————————————————————————

“So I heard that you and my brother locked horns today.”

“Your brother is a prick.”

“I know that he is, I’m just wondering what happened this time.”

“He’s doing this weird ethical-puppy love-guilt trippy-Romeo and Juliet level of doomed-unnecessary drama-thing going on and it’s completely affecting how he treats his patients. We already had one loose cannon we couldn’t disarm, now we have another. It’s come to the point that I’m genuinely worried about the patients that come into Med, and I don’t know what to do.”

“I’m sorry, I wish there was something I could do.”

“Just try not to antagonize Will, okay? He’s more on edge and that makes him erratic, I would really appreciate it if you wouldn’t make it worse.”

“Okay. I’ll leave him alone.”

“Thank you. I’m starving, what should we do for dinner?”

“Vietnamese is on the way.”

“Have I told you how amazing you are today?”

“Yes, but I would love to hear it again.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dr. Asher’s medical negligence had finally caught up with her, and for once Will wasn’t even remotely involved. He and Asher were having one of their silent spats again when Asher dropped the ball, or baby rather, during an emergency c-section of a patient she misdiagnosed and mistreated because she was in need of a fix. The only reason the mother didn’t hemorrhage and baby didn’t crack his skull was because of your observations and quick reflexes. The baby was healthy and mom was recovering and you were fuming. After scrubbing out you approached the, understandably distressed, father and told him that on your best medical opinion he and his wife should file a malpractice suit for missing an easy and obvious diagnosis, screwing up a routine surgery, and almost killing his son seconds after he was born.

You met with him, his lawyer and Asher two days later in a conference room with Goodwin and Peter the Stressed Out Lawyer. You accused her of having an addiction. The father requested a drug test. Goodwin glared, you glared back. If she didn’t want it handled like this then she should have dealt with it months ago when you brought it up your second week at Med. She tried to approach you in the hall, condescension on the tip of her tongue when you levelled her with a glare so fierce it rivalled that of Godzilla. “You do not get to scold me like I am a child. I told you when I first got here that she has a problem. That she is a danger to everyone who comes into her care. That she is a danger to other doctors. That she is a liability. Do not bitch to me when I told a husband and father who almost his wife and son to her recklessness to sue. To get angry and fight back. Do not take that petty, catty, condescending tone with me because I went around you. You have absolutely no ground to stand on. Because. You. Were. Wrong.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You were surprised you had a job to come back to the next day. So was a very pissed off and ‘heartbroken’ Will Halstead. He kept running around to your colleagues, badmouthing you, trying to get them to join in and turn on you, but that didn’t happen. They not only agreed with you but rallied around you. Doctors are not gods. They do not get to ignore a patient’s wishes or act like they don’t have restrictions and limitations. It came to the point that Will told Jay he didn’t approve of you and that he had to dump you... Despite the fact that you weren’t dating.

Jay had rolled his eyes and pushed Will out of the apartment before giving you a hug and made you pancakes for dinner. “I’m sorry that I messed up your relationship with Will.”

“Don’t be. We’re brothers, we fight from time to time, and sometimes those fights are bigger than others and that’s okay. Will, well Halsteads in general, are pretty good at torpedoing any and all romantic relationships.”

“I’m sure that’s not true.”

“My parents only got married cause my mom got knocked up and fought non-stop, Will was and still is in love with Natalie but he was too controlling, secretive, and refused to tell her about Burke, and me... Lindsay and I were on a break before we left because my Vegas wife refused to divorce me and I didn’t tell her I had even been to Vegas.”

“Okay, so maybe it’s a little true, but it’s not because you’re bad people or  Even just saying ‘yes there’s something going on but I don’t feel ready to talk about it with you’ would go a long way. Cause all you Halstead guys say is that you’re fine but you never are and if you lie to yourself you lie to your partner.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. And tell Will when his head is surgically removed from Asher’s ass. You’ve seen that he follows her around like a puppy, right?”

“Yup, everyone on the OB floor has been talking about it nonstop since he started his whatever it was with Asher.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

EIGHT MONTHS LATER

Because of the suit, the hospital conducted an internal investigation in relation to Dr. Asher that pretty much everyone could confirm. Erratic behaviour and attendance, leaving other doctors to tend to her patients while keeping her name on the case files, and horrifying evidence of being high while working. Granted that had only happened twice and she literally just sat in her office staring at paperwork the whole time. Still, she was fired, the suit was settled, and Asher lost her license. You had destroyed her career and while there was a part of you that felt guilty, you knew that in the end she did the right thing. She refused help and kept carrying on in a way that would have been detrimental to more patients if other doctors hadn’t stepped in. Will still wasn’t talking to you and had started avoiding Jay recently because you two started dating.

Barring the tension from all the Will stuff, your relationship was doing well. You had great dates (both out and at the apartment), were radiating happiness together, and Jay was taking your words about communication to heart. Not once has the phrase ‘I’m fine’ dripped off of his lips. If he didn’t want to tell you something or was more comfortable talking about it with his therapist or Upton before you he’d let you know. Most times he would just talk about what was bothering him, even if it was only bullet points sometimes you both felt relieved that functional relationships were actually possible. 

You were on a date with Jay at your favourite Jamaican restaurant when you ran into Hannah Asher. She did not look pleased to see you and quite honestly you could have lived the rest of your life happily if you never had to see her again. After a few seconds of glaring at you and your boyfriend, an annoying ginger put his arm around her. “Hi Will. How are you?”

“My girlfriend and I are doing well Jacob.”

“Really Will? You’re using my whole name because my-”

“Okay, you know what? Let’s go our separate ways. It looked like you guys were just leaving, and we’re probably confusing our poor hostess. So let’s both just walk away.”

“You ruined my life.”

“Asher-”

“You took everything from me!”

“Do you have any idea how many patients you almost killed in your time at Med? Because I do, and it’s a triple-digit number. You shouldn’t have been practicing in your condition and you know it. So you need to drop the victim act and walk away.” You saw her face contort into complete and utter rage, then everything is hazy. There were lights, bright red ones, and screaming, you were pretty sure Jay was there, and there was... Copper? Why did your mouth feel like it was full of liquid pennies? There was gurgling, was there a baby? Were they okay? You tried to speak, get up, look around, but you were too tired. You were begging yourself to move, to do something, but it felt like your bones turned into melting iron.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You didn’t remember waking up, or falling asleep for that matter, you were just looking at the glass door and suddenly it came into focus. You didn’t even know how you got to the ED, what happened at the restaurant. Dr. Choi entered your room apprehensively. “Y/L/N? How are you feeling?”

“Like I was mauled by a tiger.”

“That’s... Actually pretty close to what happened, honey.”

“Jay?”

“Hey, I’m right here. So, what’s the prognosis Choi?”

“Multiple contusions on the right side of the abdomen, lower back and around your neck, multiple lacerations all over your abdomen, forearms, and two on your head. Your liver was also perforated, we couldn’t stop the bleeding so we had to remove half of it, which you know means it’ll take a couple of months to grow back and you won��t be able to drink for around a year. We’re going to need to monitor you and run some tests, so you’re gonna be here for a few days.”

“Well I should hope so. What? Why are you two looking at me like I have eight heads? I could’ve died.”

“... You actually want to stay in the hospital and be cared for by your colleagues?”

“I trust you, besides I’ll only make things worse if I check myself out AMA, doesn’t matter how good of a doctor I am. It’ll be hard and I’m not going to enjoy it, but I have to stay here and get treated regardless so I might as well be as positive as I can about it.”

“You are officially my favourite patient.”

“And I love you even more.”

“Thanks guys, I appreciate it.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“What happened Jay? I don’t remember anything after telling her to walk away.”

“She went berserk. Attacked you. I tried to pull her off but Will lost his mind, telling me not to hurt her. I managed to toss him after a couple of seconds but I was too late. She’d already slashed you up and stabbed you twice. I grabbed her but she managed to get a bunch of kicks in while I was hauling her away from you all while screaming that she was going to kill you. I’m sorry that I couldn’t protect you. She’s sitting in a cell at the 21st right now with Platt breathing down her neck. We also did a drug test on her, she was high as all hell.”

“Please don’t feel bad Jay, I know that you reacted as fast and did as much as you could. And I know that Will did what he could to stop you. How is Will by the way?”

“He’s in the cell next to hers. He assaulted a police officer and was an accomplice in assault. Voight’s been asking if I want to drop the charges against him because he’s my brother. And I just don’t know, I wanted to talk to you first.”

“I don’t want to charge him. And I don’t want you to press charges either, but I won’t stop you if that’s what you want.”

“I don’t want him to go to jail, I want him to go to therapy. He needs it.”

“I wasn’t sure if I should say anything, but he really does. And I think you need to be the one to bring it up with him. We can do some research, too, and find psychiatrists that have their own practices so that it’s not connected to the hospital at all.”

“That sounds like a great idea, but I think you mean I do the research cause you are supposed to be resting and not doing any physically or mentally strenuous tasks.”

“Fine, fine. Just give Will a hug from me when you see him.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

ONE YEAR LATER

The day of the trial had finally arrived and you were pissed off about it. The date of the trial was the same day as your due date. The defence had done everything they could to delay the trial, and when they finally settled on the worst possible day three weeks ago, you’d tried to have it delayed again because you didn’t want to give birth in a courtroom. The defence had convinced the judge to deny it, so here you were, sitting in a sweltering room that smelled like old wood and seventies carpet for five hours beside your husband behind the district attorney doing your best not to glare at the judge. “It’s going to be okay, honey, she won’t get away with anything, it’s cut and dry. The only real thing to do is to determine her sentence.” Jay kissed your forehead and placed his hand on top of yours on your protruding stomach. You winced. “She just kicked again, Jay.”

“That’s seven minutes apart.”

“I’m in labour, we need to go.” Jay nodded to your lawyer who motioned to the judge for permission to speak. “Your honour, my client is in labour, may we adjourn so that she and her husband can go to the hospital?”

“Objection your honour!”

“Ms. Asher, do not interrupt the prosecution. I’ve heard and seen more than enough evidence. Ms. Asher, you are hereby sentenced to twenty-five years in prison for aggravated assault and attempted murder. The court now is adjourned. Oh, and Dr. Y/L/N and detective Halstead? Congratulations.”

[venushasvixens]

Your Nervousness - Kylo Ren x Reader

Warnings: angst ( talks of anxiety) fluff, some sexual references

-

The towering scenery of the planet Actlyon always intimidated you. As one of the many bases of the First Order throughout the galaxy, these was one of your least favorites. When asked what you hated about the planet, you could save them the time of a few hour conversation and just saying "everything". But as companion of Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, you have to put a lid on the subject and just deal with it.

It had been two weeks since you had seen Kylo. You were used to him being away for a long time, but he had never been gone this long. When you last saw Kylo, you were both in the control room of the Finalizer, watching as they determined where a small portion of the Resistance was, and the plan to destroy it. Instead, the Resistance caught wind of the First Order's presence, and escaped before any of the plan was put into place.

"All the better." Hux stated, " by fleeing, they'll lead us right to the Resistance."

You watched as Kylo walked past you, the Knights of Ren following suit. You immediately took after them, jogging just to keep up with the intimidating crew. You were not going to be just sideswiped by him.

"Master Ren!" you called out. Due to protocol with your high status of a prominent family of the galaxy, and your relationship with the Supreme Leader, you had to keep formality in public. But right now, you didn't know how this was going to play out, and it could've been the last time you would see Kylo ever again. Kylo continued his way down the hallway, ignoring you.

"Fuck it." you muttered under your breath , "Kylo!"

Kylo and his Knights came to a halt. He tuned to approach you, the Knights parting through the middle. His footsteps echoed through the cold, metallic hallway. Your boldness melted into obscurity as you weren't sure what was going to happen in the next few seconds. You could see your reflection in the visor of Kylo's helmet, taking note of the closeness between you two.

"Aren't..aren't you going to say goodbye before you go?" you said softly. "I don't know how long this is going to take."

Kylo stayed still, and the sudden bass of his voice startled you. "It won't be long at all, I assure you, (y/n)." That was complete bullshit, and you knew it.

Your eyes traveled down, knowing that meant it was going to be a long mission. Tears welled in your eyes. Kylo sensed your nervousness, hurting him to see you so worried of his departure.

"Hey," he murmured, his voice not loud enough for the vocoder to pick up. He lifted your head up with his hand, cusping your chin gently. "I will be back. In the mean time, I want you to be strong. For me please."

That was the last exchange of words before Kylo set off on his shuttle. You had received word from Hux that the shuttle was approaching Actlyon by evening, and with it, the Supreme Leader in one piece. Waiting was such a pain, and your anxiety was through the roof. You were so worried, you hadn't changed into your nightwear, still wearing the clothes you placed on since the early morning meeting with Actlyon First Order officials.

You jolted as your door buzzed. "Come in." you called out.

"Supreme Leader Ren is awaiting your presence in his office, my lady." the female officer announced.

You were so relieved you could've hug her. You quickly walked out, hurrying your steps to Kylo's office. As confusing as this starship was, Kylo's office was one of the few places that you knew exactly where it was. You approached the door, which was guarded by two Stormtroopers.

"The Supreme Leader has sent for me." you said, pushing past the guards. As the door closed behind you, you were standing in the small hallway, smoothing out yourself, emotionally and physically. Before you could open the door, Kylo beat you to it. Mask off and his clothes caked with substances unknown to you, Kylo looked like shit. He grabbed you and pulled you into his office.

Before you could get anything out, Kylo arms wrapped around your waist, picking you up and holding you tightly. Your arms wrapped around his neck, smiling that he was finally here with you. You held Kylo's face in your hands, kissing all over his face. Kylo's gloved hand gripped the back of your neck gently, moving his lips to yours. You melted into his kiss, feeling all the pent up anger and stress being released between you. You both pulled away, breathing heavily as Kylo rested his head on in the crook of your neck. The smell of burnt leather and fuel filled your nostrils, and should have repulsed you, but instead was very much welcomed.

"Why didn't you send me a message?" you mumbled, twirling your fingers in his long dark locks. "You had me worried for so long."

"Shh." he hushed you, "Let me just relax for a moment."

You nodded, scratching his head softly and slowly. That's all you needed to hear. Not long after did Kylo tell you how he and his Knights tracked down the Resistance, going from planet to planet, to city to city, until eventually they caught up with them, but to a dead end.

"And that's when we killed them." Kylo finished, sparing you the details of the Resistance spies gruesome deaths caused by the Knights and Kylo. You furrowed your brow in disappointment, hoping that Kylo would've spared them. Even after all this time that you both had been together, it still got to you that you were in a relationship with the mighty Kylo Ren, supreme leader of the First Order, and a killer feared by many.

Taking note of your troubled expression, Kylo brushed his hand over your cheek. You leaned yourself into his touch, placing your hand over his. A faint smile spread over the Supreme Leader's face. That was something you haven't seen in a while, and you would give up anything to see it a million times.

"Now, my love, its time for me to bombard you with questions." you said, getting out of Kylo's lap.

"Like what?" he scowled, leaning back into his chair.

"Have you ate today?" you asked, "have you showered, slept?"

Kylo sighed. "One at a time, (y/n). And no to any of them."

You chuckled. "Okay, that's all I needed to know."

While you ordered a meal to brought up, Kylo supported his head on his fist, watching you take care of him. He always loved to just look at you. And it could be you doing anything, from doing your makeup, to you getting angry over some small thing. To him, you were a walking piece of art, a masterpiece. A strong feeling of affection and love filled Kylo, almost like a fire was lit in his heart. It was like this ever since you and him met. There was never a dull moment, your relationship always filled with intense passion.

Kylo got out of his chair, walking over to you. As you made preperations for the night, you felt two hand snaked around your waist. Kylo placed his chin on your head, rocking you both back and forth slightly. The Kylo Ren that you saw was definitely not the one the galaxy feared.

"I love it when you order people around." he whispered in your ear. You giggled, interlocking your hand with his. "Come to my room tonight."

"Hmm, what for?" you teased, expecting to hear some raunchy responses.

"To sleep, obviously." Kylo replied.

"Ah, sure. To sleep." you said, air quoting. "Because that's all we do when I sleep over in your room."

"This time, I just want to sleep." he said. "I promise, my sweet." Kylo pulled back your hair to the side, exposing your neck. He placed kisses from your shoulder all the way up to your cheek, his soft lips causing goosebumps to spread all over your body.

"N-now, see this right here.."you whispered, your voice wavering from Kylo's teasing, "this is what I'm talking about."

"Just trust me. I want to sleep next to my wife, that's all." Kylo really knew how to reel you in, and you fell for it every time. Heat radiated off your face, burning your cheeks. "And if you would like, we could fuck all day tomorrow. I know that you have been wanting it as badly as I do. We both crave it. Would you like that, my sweet?"

And now, you knew for sure you were going to catch on fire.

Stars, it was so good to be home

-

"I'm beat." you said, yawning.

"How are you beat? You haven't done anything all day." Kylo teased nonchalantly as he dimmed down the lights in the bedroom.

"I waited for you, I cried for you, I even put up with Hux for you. So don't say I didn't do anything all day." you smiled, throwing your robe onto a chair.

"Yeah, sure." Kylo mumbled as he snuck himself underneath the black covers, watching as you brushed your hair thoroughly. You set the brush down, giving yourself a once over to make sure you looked alright.

"You're still beautiful. Come to bed." Kylo begged sleepily, laying on his side.

You blushed. "Alright, I'm coming."

Kylo held out the comforter as he always did. You laid right into his chest, his arms, along with the thick black comforter, engulfing you in darkness. The difference between Kylo's room and yours was definitely astounding, to say the least. You would think that the Supreme Leader's girlfriend could get some decent sheets, or maybe some more comfortable chairs.

You laid your arm around Kylo's torso, your leg wrapped between his. You closed your eyes, sighing peacefully. Kylo gave you one last kiss on your head, before turning over on his side. As betrayed as you felt, you needed some air from the sudden heat of another person and his thick ass comforter. It felt like forever laying down, and Kylo was out like a light.

But you were still wide awake. Thoughts swarmed your mind about multiple, worthless topics. Is there a guard at the door? What's Hux thinking right now? Matter of fact, what does Hux even do in his free time? Not like you cared, you just wonder if Hux had a life out of the First Order (which you concluded, he did not).

I want to sleep, you thought. And you kept thinking it, over and over, as if repeating it would inch yourself closer to some shut eye. You shifted positions, fluffed your pillow, counting backwards, forwards. Thinking of leaping fathiers could've helped.

But not one hint of sleepiness.

Eventually, you just said fuck it and got up. You carefully got up, as to not wake Kylo. You grabbed your robe and headed to the living area. You took your datapad, and flipped through the numerous events and special occasions that were coming up. You read up on the planets that you were to visit alongside Kylo, and their customs. Embarrassing yourself in front of Kylo was the last thing you needed, but knowing him, anyone who would point out your mistakes would be swiftly met with a blazing lightsaber.

You started planning your outfits and speeches while you heard shuffling from the other room. Looking up, you saw Kylo emerging from the bedroom. Rubbing his eyes, he looked at you as you continued working on your datapad.

"Its too early, starlight." Kylo said, crossing his arms.

"I couldn't sleep." you replied, meeting his gaze.

Kylo strolled over to the couch, and plopped down next to you. He placed his hand on your back, rubbing small circles. "You're stressed. I can feel it."

You hummed in response. "I am."

"Tell me why." Kylo murmured. He gently took the datapad out of your hand, placing it on the other side of him. "What's stressing you out?"

You shrugged, honestly not sure what was stressing you out. You've had trouble with anxiety ever since you were a teen, but you weren't sure why you where it came from, and why you had it. It came out of nowhere, making minor situations into paranoia and doubtful thoughts in your mind. Sometimes, you had control over it, and other times, you let it run rampant. Right now, it was running everywhere it could reach.

You felt a small pressure on your head, knowing that Kylo was trying to read you through the Force. As much as it annoyed you when Kylo did that, you were glad he did it this time. It was hard putting into words what was bothering you, and this is exactly what was needed.

"Ah."

The pressure left from your head. The use of the Force by Kylo was more comforting than it was strange. For some reason, it was how you and him bonded. For prisoners, you couldn't say the same.

"Well?" You replied softly, "what's your diagnosis?"

One beat of silence. Two beats of silence. Finally, Kylo motioned you to come closer, taking a hold of your hand. "You're stressed about me."

"Of course." You replied, "we discussed this earlier." You intertwined your fingers between Kylo's, his palm sweaty.

"We did." He mumbled. "But there's a difference between hearing it and feeling it. I thought I really understood what you were feeling, but.." Kylo shrugged. "Fuck, I feel guilty."

"Why? Because I'm stressed about you?" You said, sitting up. You took Kylo's face in your hands, his eyes averting from your gaze. "Yes I do stress about you, but my love, please don't feel guilty. At all." Kylo quickly met your gaze, and looked away.

"I'm not just saying this to make you feel better, you know. I understood what was in store when you asked me to be yours, and I still keep it in mind. Always." Kylo eyes shot up to yours after hearing your voice crack. "But I always think you're going to leave, and never come back. T-that someone will hurt you, and I'm not there to save you. And that fear weighs on my conscious all the time, Kylo."

Your tears flowed down your cheeks, your soft sobs racking your body. He hated seeing you cry, and at every opportunity that you were going to, he would try his best to stop it immediately. But by doing just that, Kylo realized, while gazing in your pained eyes, that maybe that was one of the contributing factors to your stress.

This time, he was going to gladly welcome your emotions, and ease his starlight's anxiety.

"I-I'm sorry." You croaked, swallowing the lump in your throat. "Please don't be mad at me."

Kylo shook his head, facing you as he wiped your tears away with his hands. "I could never be mad at the one person who is my reason to fight."

You laughed softly. "You're bullshitting me."

The corners of Kylo's lips upturned into a sympathetic smile. "I've never lie to you, have I?"

You sat in his lap, your head on his chest, your eyes gazing up into Kylo's. "Not once."

Kylo stroked your hair, kissing your forehead. "Is there any way that maybe you could put me to sleep with the Force?" You asked, the lines between joking and actually asking blurred.

"That's not how the Force works." Kylo said. "So what I need you to do is sit here and relax."

"That sounds like you're trying to use the Force, it really does."

"I'm not. Please shut up."

You giggled, your chin resting on his shoulder. Kylo lazily traced his fingers on your back, your back muscles relaxing instantly. It wasn't the Force, but it sure did feel like it. Maybe that's how Kylo knew how to do this. How and when did he learn how to do this? Who help him, he didn't just read these techniques in a book, someone must've taught him but who-

"I can hear you. Loud and clear. No it's not the Force, and you taught me."

You patted his chest, letting him know you heard him. Kylo moved his hands to your hair, massaging the nape of your neck, up to your scalp. Tugging gently, scratching behind your ears, your busy continuing to melt into his. Your mind wandered into off into thoughtlessness, nothing to think about or to care about, except for one thing. One little piece, a message now ingrained into you, for you to carry from now on. That you were not alone in what you were feeling, and that someone will be there for you.

And that's what helped you finally drifted into a deep sleep.

"(Y/n)?" Kylo whispered, patting your back. Hearing your small snores, Kylo got up carefully, carrying you to your bedroom. Placing you gently in your spot, Kylo took the comforter and placed it on you. You grabbed ahold of the pillow, softly cradling it. Your face was so much at peace, compared to how you looked earlier. But it didn't matter to Kylo. Every face you shown each other had been a gift, and any emotion you had is better than no emotion.

Kylo quickly made his way to your side, slipping underneath the covers. You flipped yourself to face him, your noses just inches from each other. As Kylo closed his eyes, he wondered what brought him ease. It didn't take him long though, because it was right in front of him.

Over anything, above all everything, you were his peace. His relaxation. His purpose.

——

(A/N) Thank you guys for reading, it means a lot. I'm sorry I have not posted in a while, 2021 has definitely had a rough start for me and my family. I'm hoping for the rest of the year to have mercy on me and everyone else. This is going to be a bunch of one-shots that I'll make in between the Spike Spiegel x Reader fic chapters, which I know for sure another chapter is supposed to be out neeoow.

[melon-wing]

Frustration

This is another story set in the Pirate AU. It takes place somewhere between Trauma and Dread :) Grian and Doc already met a few times, but there is nothing really going on between them. Check out the Pirate AU tag for the other stories!

The Oneshot was inspired by the dance scene in She-Ra, because me and @gridoc had a long geek out conversation about it :D No worries, there are no spoilers and you also don’t need to know the show.

~*~

Grian was looking around in annoyance. Why was he the one to be picked for this job? He hated coming to this place. There was only one upside to being here. This was a neutral zone, so he wouldn’t be in any danger. Pirates, navy and everyone else was welcome in this kingdom and they were pretty harsh with whoever broke the no fighting rule. Both navy and pirates had accepted it a long time ago. Even the ocean around the island was a fighting free zone. Nobody dared to lose the valuable access to this island. It was the one place where you got information about your enemies without being in danger. It also helped that this kingdom had a booming economy and it was always helpful to have good standing with the rich and famous here.

Today Grian was sent alongside his captain as a representative of the navy for the prince's birthday. He hated these kinds of events. It was the one disadvantage that came with rising up in the ranks. All those stiff gatherings he had to visit, pretending that the nobles were all delightful people. And ignoring it when they made fun of his poor upbringing and teasing him for growing up in such a rural place. He just bared it all with a smile. This time it wouldn’t be any different. He was already counting the minutes until all of this was over and he could return to the ship.

Grian fiddled with the blazer of his suit for probably the tenth time and took a deep breath before entering the huge ball room. A loud booming voice announced his and his captain's name as they walked in. A lot of eyes followed them. They probably knew that both of them were part of the navy. Thanks to being on so many stupid navy recruiting posters, Grian’s face had become too recognizable for his own liking.

It unnerved Grian, that with the formal wear he was unable to tell who was a pirate and who wasn't. And he hated it. He didn't want to make small talk with pirates. He didn’t trust them at all, not even in the neutral zone and it put them on edge.

He slowly walked along a red carpet up to the throne with his captain, both of them bowing respectfully before the prince. The moment Grian looked up and saw the prince's eyes raking over his body, he regretted coming here. He hated nobility and how they behaved while thinking they were better than anyone else.

As fast as the royal protocol allowed Grian hurried off to the side, getting himself a drink and a disapproving glare from his captain.

"Remember what we are here for, Grian. This is not just a celebration or some time off. We are trying to make friendly with those nobles, get better deals around here for the navy and see if we can get some information about pirate movements out of it. Use whatever means necessary, you got me? Do anything needed. Anything."

Grian resisted the urge to pull a grimace and only nodded stiffly. He already hated this event. It couldn't get any worse.

Half an hour later Grian had already moved to his third drink, but nothing could change his bad mood. There was barely any alcohol in it, far too little to take the edge off him. His captain was deeply into a discussion about politics with some of the older generals of the kingdom, while Grian had to fend of young star-struck boys and girls left and right. And some of those nobles really couldn't take no as an answer, coming back again and again, to try and pull him onto the dance floor. He always declined earning disgruntled looks and complaints.

He saw the glares his captain was throwing him now and then, but he hadn't ordered Grian to go and dance with those people. They were too young to have any valuable information anyways. It would be a waste of time and he couldn’t let his guard down to dance.

Still his Captain came stomping over after a few more of his refusals, pulling him aside. "Listen here, brat. You might be my first mate, because someone decided you looked good in that position and you have more luck than brains, but you are nothing special. Stop being so high and mighty. If I see you declining one more dance I will make you scrub the whole ship with a fucking toothbrush. You got that? No matter who approaches you next, you will fucking accept the dance with a smile."

Grian swallowed, balling his hands to fists. He hated being ordered around like this. He wished he could finally rise in the ranks to become captain... But then the admirals would probably piss him off... He would never be able to escape people ordering him around on a whim. "Understood, sir", he finally ground out, glaring at his glass.

"And smile, Grian, honey."

Grian took a deep breath and then put on his best fake smile, finally satisfying his captain enough to go back to those stuff old politicians. Grian just hoped that after all those refusals noone else would dare to approach him...

"Announcing: Captain Doc and his First Mate Ren" A voice echoed through the room and Grian froze, his glass slipping from his hand and clattering to the floor. Luckily it didn't break and one of the maids hurried along to clean up the mess pretty fast.

Grian's eyes were fixed on the entrance where he saw Doc and Ren walk through the crowd, up to the throne. Doc did a rather elegant bow with that dumb smirk of his. He said something, making the prince blush and chuckle. That stupid pirate was truly flirting with everyone he met. Grian couldn't help but get irritated by it. If that guy was already sweet talking the prince he must have been planning something. This was a neutral zone, but Doc was a pirate. He wouldn't care about those rules. He never seemed to care about anything. Grian probably should keep an eye on him, but at the same time he wanted to be as far away as possible. He didn't want Doc to notice him.

Grian got himself another drink, leaning against one of the pillars and looking through the crowd at Doc, who was talking with some young noblemen, who were all looking at him as if he was a piece of meat in that suit of his. Grian didn't want to know which poor guy they stole that suit from... It fit Doc rather well and... No. Fuck. No! It didn't look good on him at all.

"You keep staring at my captain like this and I might think you were trying to either murder or fuck him."

Grian jumped at the voice and turned around so fast he lost his balance. He was lucky enough when an arm wound around his waist, catching him before he could fall. He looked up into the smiling face of a man he knew all to well. They had met on the battle field a few times by now.

"Ren! Stop talking such nonsense!"

Ren just shrugged and looked over Grian's shoulder with a grin. "Oh damn. I think I made the Captain angry, putting my hands all over his prey", he joked and Grian turned around again to see Doc walking through the crowd towards them. Oh fuck! He had to get away. He didn’t want to interact with Doc at all if possible. He needed to hurry. But when he moved to take a step, Ren’s grip on his hip tightened. "Oh, I don't think so, Lieutenant Grian. We are all here to have a little fun. Don't just run away."

Grian would have struggled, but starting a fight now would probably get him thrown out and piss his Captain off so much. He still tried to gently push Ren's hands off of him. He didn't make it in time. Doc stepped up to them and he found himself trapped between two tall pirates. It shouldn't have made him feel so nervous. He had fought both of them before and came out victorious. But he was unarmed at the moment and he didn't trust them to be as well.

"Captain Doc... What a displeasure to meet you here."

Doc chuckled, looking Grian up and down slowly. "You look good, Grian. You should wear a suit more often. It is very nice. Far better than that dumb uniform and all it stands for."

Grian huffed and turned to look to the side, glaring at the tables on the wall, not even answering that. Maybe if he ignored them long enough, they'd go away. Or maybe he was lucky enough and his captain would notice the predicament he was in. They both knew Ren and Doc after all. His Captain wouldn't want Grian to be in any danger now, would he?

"Oh, playing hard to get now? I just want a little chat, that's all."

"Fuck you...", Grian muttered in annoyance, letting his gaze wander over to where his captain was standing. That stupid old man still hadn't noticed Grian getting cornered.

"Well then...", Doc bowed a little before him, holding out his hand. "How about a little dance?"

Grian's mouth fell open in shock. That guy couldn't be serious! Why in the world would Grian want to dance with him? There was no way. The only way they danced was with their swords.

Finally his Captain seemed to notice what was going on, watching Grian like a hawk. Hope bloomed in Grian's chest. He would be saved from this hell now. A few seconds passed, nothing happened. His Captain just kept staring. Well, Grian would handle himself then. He turned to glare at Doc. "I'll dance with you once the ocean dries out", he spat, making Ren behind him laugh and loosen his grip. He used the opportunity to swiftly step out between them and hurry off towards his captain. Surely not even Doc would dare to follow him there.

"Grian, what was that?" His Captain's voice was filled with disapproval. "I thought I ordered you not to refuse anyone again.”

"Well... You can’t honestly expect me to dance with that fucking pirate! He is evil! He killed some of our people. We fought him before!”

Grian not only got glared at by his Captain, but the other people around them seemed to look at him in disapproval as well. That's why he hated the neutral zone. Everyone seemed to pretend that pirates were fine people here. Pretending they never did anything wrong. His Captain noticed their glares as well and grabbed Grian's arm so hard it would probably leave marks later. Funny how gentle Ren's grip had been compared to it, Grian thought to himself.

The Captain pulled him close, before hissing into his ear. "You'll go back there now and dance with him. Otherwise we’ll have a problem, you got me? You do remember the last time you didn’t follow my orders, do you?"

Grian wanted to defy him so badly. He wanted to say fuck it all and just storm out the ballroom. But that would probably offend royal protocol and he didn't want to imagine the punishment he'd get for that. His back already ached at the memory alone of the last time. His Captain might be a good soldier, but when it came to punishments he would be pretty harsh and when he threatened something, he'd sure as hell pull through.

"I... Yes."

"Yes, what?"

"Yes, sir..." Finally the pressure on Grian's arm faded, as he was given a little shove into Doc's direction. Grian hung his head and walked back to where Doc was still standing, watching his every move.

Grian stopped in front of the pirate, who had an unreadable expression on his face. Ren behind him looked furious, probably still mad about the refusal Grian had given Doc.

"Grian, are you being a-"

Grian interrupted him before he could finish, still feeling his Captain's eyes on his back.

"Would you still like to dance with me, Captain Doc?", he asked or more like spat out, holding out his hand and glaring at Doc. He wanted it to be perfectly clear, that this wasn’t really his idea of a good time.

Doc didn't seem to mind the hostile way it had been said, a huge smile forming on his face. He took Grian's hand and pulled him in suddenly so Grian smashed against his chest. "I'd be delighted, Lieutenant Grian. Who knew the ocean would dry out this fast."

Grian growled low in his throat, but he still let Doc pull him onto the dancefloor, where a new song was about to start. They got into position and while Grian tried to put as much distance as possible in between them, Doc would have none of it and pulled him close again.

"Don't be so shy, Grian. It's just a dance. Enjoy yourself a little. I promise I won’t harm you. I’m pretty good at this."

The first notes of the melody played as Doc took the lead, a hand on Grian's hip gently guiding him through the steps. Doc smiled softly at him, as if they had never fought before, as if there was no bad blood between them, as if this was perfectly normal. Grian couldn't believe it.

"Why are you even here, pirate?", he growled out as Doc twirled him below his arm. Doc laughed a little at that question.

"Always so suspicious. Can't we just be here to have some fun? It is the neutral zone after all. We do frequent business here, so we were invited. We are just here to have some fun and get some free food."

Grian looked at him in doubt. As if a pirate would just come to some stupid stuck up dance to enjoy himself. That was impossible. They must have been planning something. Grian looked around the room as they moved in circles on the dancefloor, searching for Doc's first mate. Maybe they were planning something while Doc distracted Grian. But no, Ren still stood where they had left him, watching both of them with a fond smile.

"I'd rather you'd look at me now, my dear. You always treat Ren so much nicer than me. Falling into his arms like that earlier, one could think you guys were flirting without me."

Grian's eyes snapped back to Doc, his body shaking in fury. "I would never!"

Doc's smirk only widened, showing his sharp teeth. "Good to hear, that you wouldn't flirt without me."

Grian fumed, a jumbled mess of words leaving his mouth, making Doc chuckle. His hand left Grian's hips and he twirled him away with the other, only to twirl him back a second later, pulling Grian flush against his chest.

"Listen, Grian... You could join my crew. That old guy would never be able to order you around like that ever again", Doc whispered into his ear, the hot breath sending a shiver through Grian's body. "I would never treat you like that. I'm an amazing Captain."

Grian pushed away a little, still not daring to let Doc go to stop the dance. He knew the way his Captain treated him wasn't alright. He knew that. He’d known that since the first time he had been punished. But to hear it from the mouth of a fucking pirate was a slap in the face. "You might think you are perfect, but you kill people. I might be... He might..." Grian broke off, casting one nervous glance to the side where his Captain was watching them. "He isn't perfect, but I'd never betray him or the navy for scum like you."

Doc stared at him for a while and then sighed, before his smile returned. "Well can't blame me for trying. But you bet your cute ass I'm going to enjoy this as long as it lasts."

They moved elegantly through the crowd to the melody of the song and even if he hated it, Grian had to admit, that Doc was a pretty good dancer. If he just pretended it was anyone else but the pirate Captain this would be pretty nice. As Doc pulled him close again, Grian just sighed in defeat and closed his eyes, letting his body be moved through the steps by the other. It wasn't half bad. The song was nice, Doc's hands were gentle, his body was warm. It was weird how in that moment he felt so good… so safe. And then Doc suddenly dipped Grian, his eyes snapping open again. Doc was looming over him with that lopsided smirk of his.

"I wish I could take you to my bed tonight, to be the one who takes that suit off of you."

The warm feeling left Grian's chest in a heartbeat and he glared again. "Your jokes have been better, asshole." Doc laughed at him and pulled him up again, staring into his eyes so intensely, Grian almost had to avert his gaze. But he couldn't even let the pirate win this battle. "So why don't you tell me why you guys are really here? I know you are planning something. I’ve known you for a while now. You would never come to an event like this otherwise."

Doc hummed, still looking highly amused. "Well I could tell you if you really want to know."

"Yeah?"

"You'd have to give me something in return, of course", Doc replied, pushing Grian away again, spinning him around before pulling him back. He didn't put his hands on Grian's hip this time but rested it gently under Grian's chin, tilting his head back even further. "Just a little something..."

Grian's breath hitched. They were so close now. The last notes of the song faded. They stayed there, their warm breath mingling in between them. Grian's eyes flickered down to Doc's lips and then back to his eyes again. Was it his imagination or were they getting closer and closer with each second that passed?

And then someone tapped onto Grian’s shoulder, making him jump away as if he had been burned by Doc. Turning around, he saw the prince behind him, smiling brightly.

"A dance, my dear soldier", he asked in a thick accent, taking Grian's hand and planting a soft kiss onto it. Grian's eyes widened, a blush appearing on his cheeks as he nodded. If he were to refuse this dance he'd be demoted for sure. It might also help him forget the dance he had just shared with Doc… And to forget what he had almost done for some piece of information.

As the next song started and the prince pulled him uncomfortably close, Grian swore he could hear Doc mumble: "I'm so going to enjoy robbing that asshole later." Grian looked over his shoulders at Doc's retreating form. He was about to alarm the prince, but when he felt a rather unwelcome hand on his ass, Grian decided to pretend he never heard about the planned crime.

[infinitefandomimagines]

Tell Her - Poe Dameron x reader

...

WARNINGS: BLOOD, JEALOUSY, LANGUAGE 

REQUEST: @poedamneron01 HELLOO! I was wondering if I could have a poe x reader imagine where reader has a huge crush on poe and they’ve been friends since they both joined the resistance, the reader gets jealous of poe and zurii’s interactions. THEN, fast forward to the final order battle, and reader gets injured and poe is worried and like confesses to her. I’m sorry if none of this makes sense but i’m looking forward to the imagine !!!

...

You'd always had a sliver of hope that he liked you as much as you liked him.

The years of back and forth flirty banter and jokes. The number of times the two of you shared a bed when one of you had trouble sleeping due to nightmares. Or how he made you feel safe through every step of the ongoing war. The way he trusted you when he finally opened up about his past and insecurities. The way the two of you just clicked the first time you met after joining the resistance, and only grew closer time went on. That couldn't all just mean nothing.

But that sliver of hope was quickly crushed the second you arrived on Kijimi. You knew from the way he looked at her the chance of him liking you back when from slim to none. It was obvious they had a past, and even more obvious both of them still held onto it.

You had to hide the pain and jealousy as Poe eagerly followed Zorii to the roof to keep lookout. You hated the pitiful looks Finn and Rey gave you because they knew. They knew about your silly little crush without you even having to tell them. Hell, they knew you were in love with him before you ever admitted it to yourself, and for the longest time, they always pressed the fact that Poe shared the same feelings. But now they were silent, not sure how to comfort your broken heart.

After a while, you became suspicious of how long Zorii and Poe had been gone, and why they hadn't reported anything to the rest of you. "I'm gonna go check on them," you announced aloud.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Finn asked, concerned about what you might walk in on.

"Yeah, they've been up there a while, just wanna make sure no one's coming to kill us," you tried to joke, but Finn saw straight through the poor attempt. You didn't say it with an attitude or a wink, instead, you just sounded sad and tired. Not at all like your self.

"Okay," he said softly, knowing he really couldn't stop you.

You climbed the stairs to the roof quietly, not wanting to alert anyone of your presence. You knew it was wrong to eavesdrop in their conversation, but jealousy and curiosity got the better of you.

You listened for a couple of minutes, but eventually, guilt began to set in. You shouldn't be doing this, if you really did love Poe, then you should want the best for him. It was just hard to accept that the best for him wasn't going to be you.

It was when Zorii offered Poe the chance to escape with her that you left, in all honesty, you didn't want to hear his answer. Scared he might actually take her up on the offer.

But maybe you shouldn't have left so early, maybe had you stayed just a moment longer you would've heard him decline the offer.

"I can't leave the resistance, I can't. . . I can't leave her," he confessed.

"The girl downstairs? What was her name again, Y/N?"

Poe nodded, "It's just. . .when I'm with her, it's like time slows down, ya know? Like for a second, there isn't any bad in the world, no war, no First Order, no Kylo Ren, none of it. Like it's just me and her, safe and happy. I can't lose that."

There was a sad look in Zorii's eyes, but at the same time, it seemed like she understood. Somehow she still looked happy for him.

"Well have you told her yet?" Zorii asked.

"Told her what?"

Zorii rolled her eyes at Poe's obliviousness, "Everything you just told me, dumbass." Poe shook his head, "Nah, it'd just fuck everything up, I can't mess up years of friendship over a stupid crush."

"Well I think you should tell her, life is too short and unpredictable these days to not. It sounds to me like you really love this girl, she deserves to know that."

Poe let out an anxious laugh, "What? Love? No, no I'm not in love with her, it- it's just a crush." Zorii gave him a look, one he knew meant that she didn't believe him.

"J- Just because I think she's the most beautiful girl doesn't mean I love her," Poe rambled. "I mean. . . okay, yeah- I'll admit that when she's around it does make my day better and that her laugh is one of the best sounds in the world. Oh, and that she always makes me feel safe when I'm terrified about what's gonna happen to the resistance, and that- oh fuck. . . I'm in love with her."

"So tell her you idiot," Zorii said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "You may not see it, but I only just met the chick and even I can tell you mean something to her."

"Thank you, Zorii, I really mean it."

"No problem, I'm happy to call you out on being an idiot any time."

Poe let out a soft chuckle, sending a small smile to Zorii, which she returned with a breathy laugh.

Poe had completely planned on telling you how he felt after his conversation with Zorii. However, he never got to. Everything started going downhill, and fast. Breaking into Kylo Ren's ship, Rey running off, Leia's death, the hurriedly planned mission to Exogol. Not to mention you'd barely even look at him since you left Kijimi.

Before he knew it, the entire resistance base was in chaos as everyone prepared for what they hoped would be the last battle. He wished he had more time. Time to tell you how he felt, time to cherish another moment with you, and time to create a better plan.

Poe wasn't too happy about the plan at all, well he would've been, had it not been for one small detail. You were on the ground team. You couldn't fly, but you were one hell of a combat fighter and highly skilled in weaponry. It seemed like a no brainer to have you on the ground team, but it was dangerous, and he didn't like that you'd be somewhere he couldn't keep an eye on you.

But there was nothing he could do about it now. Because now he was in an X-wing, dodging blasts and talking his team through their procedures. The ground team had been deployed onto the command ship to take out its navigation system, you and Finn leading.

The battle was brutal, there were about four times as many stormtroopers as there were resistance ground fighters. It was starting to become nearly impossible to gain any ground with the amount of shots from blasters flying through the air.

You, Finn, and Jannah crouched behind a metal structure, trying to take cover. "We need to get to that tower! Finn yelled over the commotion surrounding the three of you. You glanced at the explosives strapped to Finn's chest, an idea popping into your head.

"Give me all the explosives you have!" Finn and Jannah didn't even question you, handing over their chest straps without hesitation.

"If we blow their main control panel we can shut down their navigation tower. Can you cover me?" You explained.

"You can't go alone!" Finn argued, not liking the idea.

"I'm fast, I can make it to the tower as long as you cover me!"

"I say we do it," Jannah spoke up. You gave Jannah a small smile, happy she was on your side. Finn let out an exasperated sigh, "Fine," he grumbled, "Just please be careful."

You nodded to Finn as he hesitantly handed over his explosives belt. "Cover me on three. One. Two. Three!"

You jumped up from behind your hiding spot, swiftly maneuvering your way around the ship's deck, dodging blasters and stormtroopers left and right. Finn and Jannah managed to land a few shots, fending off more stormtroopers from you.

You were nearly to the port which housed the main control panel when a crackling in your ear drew your attention. "Finn! You gotta get that ship's navigation offline!" Poe's voice broadcast over the ear-comms.

"I know! Y/N's about to blow their main control panel!" He responded, before shooting down another trooper that was sneaking behind you. You refused to stop moving, weaving your way around the troopers and shooting the few you couldn't avoid.

"I'm sorry, she's what? Alone?" Poe didn't sound too happy. "Y/N that's too dangerous!"

You rolled eyes, "I can handle myself, I'm nearly there!"

You hated that the entire resistance was hearing your little dispute, but the comms were all connected, and Poe hadn't bothered to switch to a private channel. "Go back now! I'm not losing over this half-assed plan, there's a better way!"

"This isn't your decision Poe!" You snapped, tired of him telling you what to do. You heard him mutter a few frustrated choice words into the comms. Despite his protests, you ended up reaching the port that held the controls. Jannah and Finn surrounded you as you opened the latch and dropped all but one of the explosives into the hole.

"I'm about to detonate, go!" You yelled over the commotion to Finn and Jannah. They both looked back at you before hesitantly taking cover, they knew better than to argue.

"I'm about the blow the tower offline, now's our chance," you spoke over the comms to the resistance. You switched on the last explosive, its blinking red light letting you know it was active. You dropped it into the hole along with the other explosives and shut the port.

You scrambled to your feet and started moving as quickly as you could to get away from the explosion that was sure to come. You only made it a couple of meters before a sharp impact to the side of your head sent you to the ground. A stormtrooper towered over you, his blaster trained on you.

"Rebel scum," he scoffed, his voice modulator making him sound cold and robotic. However, before he had a chance to pull the trigger, a loud noise rattled the ground, and a blaze of orange and red erupted from the control port.

You quickly curled into a ball with your back to the explosion, trying your best to protect yourself. You felt a few sharp stings on your arms and back, and then one sharp stab in your side. A large thud next to you alerted your attention. The stormtrooper from before was now on the ground, a crimson liquid pouring out from his unprotected neck.

You quickly crawled behind another ledge to get out of the main chaos of the battle. You clutched your side, feeling a warm and sticky liquid accumulate.

"You did it! The tower is down!" Poe's voice rang out over the comms, he was ecstatic. Your plan had worked, and now there was no way for the Final Order to escape Exogol.

You'd suffered a few scratches caused by shrapnel flying past, but the piece that was lodged into your side posed quite the threat. Blood wouldn't seem to stop flowing from the wound, and your mind was getting cloudier by the second.

"I'm hit," you spoke weakly into your comm, using all your strength as you tried to pull yourself up, failing miserably. Each attempt sending a wave of pain through your torso. "Finn, I need help, I'm losing blood fast." You knew he had to be close, your best bet was Finn getting you somewhere safe. However, it wasn't Finn who responded first.

"Y/N!?" Poe's voice was frazzled and panicked. "What do you mean you're hit, what happened?"

"Shrapnel from the explosion," you explained quickly, "Finn, I can't move I need you or Jannah!" You were becoming more desperate, the light airy feeling in your head growing.

"I see you, but there's troopers everywhere! I can't get to you!" Finn also sounded panicked. He searched desperately for any possible way to get to you, but each proved more difficult than the last. "Just hang on, I'm gonna find a way!"

"Finn get her out of there!" Poe barked, not exactly helping the situation. "I'm trying!" Finn yelled back.

A numb feeling washed over you, and suddenly the unbearable pain in your side started slowly dissipating. Shock fully took over as your body tried everything it could to make this as painless as possible, almost as if it knew you weren't gonna make it out of this. And oddly enough, your fear of death began to subside.

Up above you could see ships appearing throughout the sky. It looks like the Resistance's call for help hadn't gone unheard. A small smile graced your lips as you watched more and more ships arrive. Lando's voice came over the comms, as well as a few others, but one stuck out to you. Zorii. She was alive. There was an odd sense of relief as you realized Poe would be okay, he wouldn't be alone.

You shivered as you grew colder and colder, slowly accepting you might not make it out of this battle. "I-it's okay. . . It's okay." You muttered, slightly slurring your words together.

"Why does it sound like you're giving up?" Poe said worriedly. "J-Just hold on, you'll be fine-- Finn you need to hurry!"

"I know, I'm working on it!"

"I'm sorry, Poe," you said softly, not sure of the comms would pick of your voice or not. "I'm sorry I've been so weird lately I just-"

"Stop apologizing like you're going to die, you're fine!"

For a second, you thought about telling Poe how you felt, but that second passed just as quickly as it came to mind. You couldn't do that to him, you couldn't put that kind of guilt on him. He deserved to be happy, live the rest of his days out with Zorii and his friends.

"You'll be okay," you whispered out. It was intended for Poe, yet deep down you knew it was just your way of reassuring yourself.

You let your eyes flutter shut, taking in your last few seconds of consciousness. The words you heard next were barely audible, and truth be told you weren't positive it was even real. But the second they were spoken, darkness finally consumed you.

"Please don't leave me, Y/N.”

...

Your breath hitched and caught in your throat, causing your eyes to snap open as you gasped for air. Your head came in contact with a clear barrier, a loud thud echoing in the chamber you were encapsulated in. You immediately recognized the structure, it was the same one Finn rested in as he recovered from his fight against Kylo Ren.

Your fingers found the release lever inside of the contraption, pulling it. There was a soft hiss as the transparent, glass top hinged open. The second you sat up your head began to spin, and a horrible pain radiated from your side, along with a matching headache. You hunched over, curling into yourself as you let the pain subside. 'No more sudden movements,' you thought to yourself.

You cautiously stood up, your movements as slow as molasses. You eventually found some extra clothes in a nearby cabinet and changed into a pair of white sweatpants, a thin thermal t-shirt, and white slippers. As you changed you got a glance at the large white bandage covering your side. 

You felt disoriented, completely unaware of what day it was or what had even happened. In your confused state, you instinctively headed for the door. Opening the door, you stepped into an empty white hallway.

You'd been here before.

It suddenly clicked in your brain where you were, the resistance base. Though you were still confused as to how you ended up in the medical wing. Deciding the best way to get some answer was to find people, you made your way to the cantina. 

It seemed as though you’d picked the perfect destination, the cantina was bustling with humans and aliens alike. Many of them had bandaged legs, broken arms, and cuts and bruised all over their bodies, yet all of them were smiling and laughing. Your eyes scanned the room, looking for someone you knew could give you answers.

Your eyes landed on a table in the center of the room. Rey, Finn, Rose, and Poe all sat together, and while most of them were smiling and talking enthusiastically, it was Poe who held a certain sadness in his features. His lips were set in a thin line, the corners of them drooping down ever so slightly, and he looked tired, exhausted even. He had a small cut on his forehead, but other than that he was generally unharmed.

Your feet started moving on your own, carrying you over to the table where your friends sat, yet none of them had noticed you in the crowded room. However, as you got closer Rey perked up from her slouched position, fully alert. Finn, Poe, and Rose all gave her weird looks. She whipped her head around to face you, causing the others to draw their attention your way as well. You watched as each of their facial expressions melted into one’s of pure shock and confusion. However, it was Poe who reacted first; standing up abruptly, his metal chair making an awful scraping noise as he did so. 

His pace was slow at first, but soon enough it turned to a light jog as he closed the distance between the two of you. Your lips parted to ask him what the hell you’d missed, but before you had the chance, you were completely engulfed in his arms. One of his arms crossed you back, his hand resting just below your shoulder, and held the back of your head with his other hand. You didn’t react at first, completely caught off guard, but eventually, you snaked your arms around his waist, burying your face in his chest.

“You’re awake?” He whispered in disbelief, “How long ago did you wake up?” 

You gently pulled away from the hug to talk to him properly. You shrugged, “Five-ish minutes?”

By now Finn, Rey, and Rose had made their way from their table over to you and Poe. “Do you remember what happened? The war?” Finn pressed, yet his voice was soft and comforting. You were about to ask what he was talking about but the second you opened your mouth it was like a switch flipped in your brain.

Zorii. The war. Blowing the tower. Getting hit. The pain.

You nodded your head hesitantly, “I-I think so? How long has it been since. . ?” 

“Two days,” Poe said, his voice slightly pitchy with emotion.

“Y/N. . .We won!” Rey’s voice was breathy and full of hope, “Because you blew up that tower!”

“And almost died.” Poe spat out matter of factly. His tone wasn’t aggressive, but you could tell there was a hint of anger in his words. Angry at the First Order. Angry at himself for not doing more. Angry at you for being so reckless.

“I did what had to be done, they were picking us off like flies,” You explained as the memories resurfaced. 

“Do you have any idea what I would’ve done had you died? Do you have any idea what that would have done to me?” Poe’s raised voice began to draw the attention of more than a few others. The added looks and attention made you feel a bit self-conscious.

“The Resistance is bigger the individual, we both agreed that its cause comes before ourselves-”

“Yeah well, not when it comes to you!”

You and Poe locked eyes in silence as his chest heaved with heavy and emotion-filled breaths. His eyes were red and had a glossy sheen over them. You searched Poe’s face for any hint as to what exactly he meant, but all you could see was anguish. “I don’t understand . . .” you whispered.

Poe took in a deep breath, “I love you,” he hesitantly mumbled out. “I don’t care if telling you makes things weird or if you don’t feel the same I just- you almost died. And all I could think about is how you’d never know how I really felt and I saw how empty my life would be if I didn’t have you in it. So yeah, when it comes to you, fuck everything else, fuck all of it. Cause it all means nothing if I don’t have you.”

You weren’t quite sure how to react. Part of you wanted to jump into his arms and never let go, but the other part of thought about Zorii and what you heard on the roof. Poe’s face started to fall as you just stared at him, completely unreadable. You noticed his shift in demeanor, and you knew you had to do something, you couldn’t let him think you didn’t feel the same. 

Before you knew it, you were moving. Your hands found their way to Poe’s face, pulling him down as you stood on your toes. Your lips met his gently, which was surprising considering how long you’d been wanting to kiss the man. Poe reacted immediately, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you in closer to him. 

“Maker’s sake, finally,” you heard Finn mutter under his breath, causing both you and Poe to laugh, breaking the kiss. 

“I hope that means you feel the same,” Poe grinned, back to his charming and confident self. You rolled your eyes, “What, you want more proof?”

Poe shrugged, “I definitely wouldn’t mind a little more.”

“I love you, Poe Dameron,” You whispered, smiling up at him. His grin grew, “I love you too, I always have.”

[shinobirain24]

Beacon Academy Reunion Surprise

It was a starry night of Beacon Academy Reunion for students who graduated from Shade Academy. To honor the students whose lives were lost in the Fall of Beacon, including the legendary Pyrrha Nikos. A friend and teammate of Jaune Arc in Beacon.

He and his wife, Samantha Rain (a nurse who met Jaune in the wars), and their son, Johnathan Arc, gathered to pay their respects at the statue of Pyrrha in front of the fountain.

"Pyrrha, thank you." Jaune murmured.

"Jaune, I am sorry. She has been wonderful in life." Said his wife. And his 17-year-old son patted him for condolences. "She will always be remembered, dad."

"Thank you, she is always a good huntress, even if she didn't get the chance." Jaune replied.

Later, Ruby and Jaune are having a discussion with some old friends and teammates.

"And then I said, You're not the boss of me, Cinder!" Sun joked. Hearing Cinder's name is haunting them for the rest of their lives and Sun just looked back lien it was yesterday.

"What matters is that she is gone forever. As for Mercury, he was beyond redeemable." Ruby adds.

"Don't blame ya, heard General Schnee sentence Mercury to life in prison. Don't think he'll be getting out anytime soon." Added Emerald who was invited as a guest.

"Also, want to hear the latest gossip?" Sun asked.

"You're a grown man and you're still into hearing gossips?" Blake asked.

"Oh, Kai told me and it was actually interesting." The others seems to be willing to hear it. "I heard Cardin's wife was having an affair with a psychology teacher in Beacon behind his back." Sun said. This got them all paled. They don't know what to think of it. But thought it was just a rumor or a joke.

"Sun, you're joking right?" Ruby asked.

"Never saw it, so I am not sure." Sun crossed his arms.

"Even if Cardin was just a bully, couldn't help but feel bad for him if that were true." Added Ren. Still not sure of that was just a joke.

Then the inevitable happened. Cardin Winchester's son, Carter, tapped the microphone causing it to screech. Catching up be audience attention. "Testing, testing! Is this thing on?!" He shouted. "Okay, I have an announcement to make. It's been years since the reopening of Beacon Academy where is students are given the chance. And now without further or do, I have a surprise for my dearest parents. One who was a student at the time." Carter announced.

"What was Carter up to this time? I know he's a troublemaker, but man I never took him for a volunteer." Said Johnathan.

"Dear, this so going to be splendid. He's doing the surprise for us and... huh?!" Cardin and his wife, Catrina, saw in shock about the pictures that Carter is sliding through the projectile.

All the other parents and their teenage children stood staring at the screen. It was all the photos of Catrina kissing his psychology teacher.

"Oh god..."

"Those two are seeing each other."

"Kai isn't lying after all."

It turned out Carter found out about the affair and told his father about it. But since he didn't believe him, Carter decides to take matters into his own hands by exposing his own mother. "Catrina! How could you!" Cardin shouted.

"Darling, it wasn't what it looks like!"

"Cut the crap! Back then I didn't believe Carter when he saw you. Trusting you was a big mistake!" Cardin stormed out the school, while Catrina ran after him to try to apologies. Carter on the other hand stood on stage, laughing thinking he was winning.

As for the audience, they just remained silent trying to process the situation. Later the next day, Headmistress Goodwitch called Carter to her office and suspended him for two weeks for the night that happened for mischievous behavior. At least for what she saw was reasonable, she thanked Carter for exposing the teacher.

The psychology teacher got fired the next week for adultery and Cardin filed for divorce after the shocking revelation. And got custody for Carter since he has not yet turned 18.

Meanwhile. "Dear!" Said Samantha, calling out to Jaune standing in front of Pyrrha's memorial. "I know coming here means a lot to you, but you need to eat something." Samantha bought him a nice sandwich. "General Arc." She winked.

"Thanks Sammy." Jaune replied and chowed down on the sandwich. And then kissed him on the cheek.

"The reunion just went crazy. Guess the party didn't go as planned."

"Look at the bright side. Our only boy will be attending Beacon for the second year."

"I never mentioned to you about the mistakes I made before. I didn't mentioned for the real reason I went to Beacon. The truth is, I managed to get in.by faking transcripts. But while I was struggling to blend in, Pyrrha came along and helped me catch up for what it needs to be done. She taught me that death or failure is not the end. But trying is what kept you going." Jaune explained.

Samantha somehow reminded him of Pyrrha. Because of the gentle aura he felt though her. Jaune knew that there is life that was just as previous as his family. He caressed Samantha's cheek and pressed his forehead against hers. Looking at the statue, promising her that the future will be bright for new generations.

[itsclydebitches]

The post about how characters don't connect to the setting is one of the reasons why the beginning of V7 frustrated me so much. James gives this plan of telling the world about Salem, Weiss rightfully points out their will be panic everywhere and NO ONE connects that with the very real fear that this plan could put all their families in danger. Nor does anyone get excited about the Amity project potentially allowing them to call home. Ruby's been away for A YEAR. Doesn't she miss her dad at all?

Exactly! This isn't a bad faith criticism where we're demanding the show do a ton of emotional work that there just isn't time for in the fighting focused plot; a claim that it's awful because it's not functioning as one genre (like a drama, soap opera, etc.) over another (action/adventure, fantasy, sci-fi)... I mean we get nothing in regards to this issue. Not even crumbs. And these connections are, supposedly, at the very heart of the "trust love" narrative. I think it's easy for people to forget what happens between volumes — especially given the "Only the latest volume is canon" mentality — but we literally had Ironwood announce to Ruby that he'd need to use his army to keep the grimm attacks at bay once the Salem secret was revealed and then a volume later Ruby reveals the Salem secret (along with a whole lot else that is scary, horrifying, and generally negative-emotion educing) after she's cut all ties with Ironwood and his army is fully engaged in keeping Salem at bay. There is no discussion, let along concern and worry, about how many people she just got killed for an announcement that the show has failed to justify. Why is telling the world about Salem worth the casualties it will cause? What is the world going to do against the immortal witch? Ruby doesn't know. That's her whole dilemma this volume: wanting easy answers and then crumbling when she can't think of any. Problem is, she endangered the whole world before admitting, "Oh, I have no idea how to stop all this awfulness."

I mean, I understand on an emotional level why the hypocrisy of Ruby's lies and secrets don't land because most people in the fandom dislike, or outright hate, Ozpin. That's really going to color any reading there, when suddenly the beloved hero is mirroring someone you despise — you'll do whatever mental gymnastics are necessary to keep them separate. But Ruby has no evil contrast here. This is all her. We watch her make a decision that she knows will endanger the entire world, including her loved ones, and it's never even raised as a concern. The same way no one raises concerns about going to Vacuo. Yes, supposedly escaping was the only option available (I say "supposedly" because the plot did a terrible job of convincing us that evacuation was still necessary with Salem currently exploded and it having been established that she's only after the Relic on Atlas), and in a crisis situation they aren't necessarily thinking about long-term survival (that's my own stance regarding Ironwood's desire to rise high: he's not thinking about how to live there indefinitely, just how to survive the next few hours), but why send them to the Kingdom they know Salem will attack next? The Crown is hidden. You have the Lamp and the Staff. You know Salem is after all the Relics, so of course she's going to Vacuo. And so you dump however many refugees there, in the city she's gunning for next, intentionally setting up the next Fall of Atlas? Yeah, we all know it's because structurally the story hasn't been to Vacuo yet, but in-world it makes the characters look incredibly stupid. Why dump an entire Kingdom's worth of people in the most hostile environment, with the most wary citizens, a place you know the Big Bad is heading to next, when you could instead split them up and send them to safer Kingdoms that aren't currently in Salem's path? "Oh, it's because Vacuo still has huntsmen and they need huntsmen to combat all the grimm." There wouldn't be a massive grimm problem is Ruby hadn't told the whole world about Salem!

And this problem of not thinking through actions in a way that demonstrates real care for the world is just compounded over and over on a personal level. It's the same way Ruby doesn't care about what happened to Qrow until she hopes he can fix everything. The same way she doesn't react to Yang "dying." The same way Yang didn't mention Summer for five volumes. The same way Jaune, Yang, and Nora rejected Ren until he fell in line. The same way Blake is trying to inspire Ruby when they've barely exchanged a handful of sentences since Beacon. The same way, as you say, no one has made mention of the family they've left behind, let alone considered how building a communications tower might be a way of reconnecting with them, especially when at least two of them — Ruby and Oscar — left completely out of the blue. Are they presented as caring about how that inevitably hurt their care givers? Nah. The fandom gives Tai so little slack, but at least the story showed him watching Ruby's message and being upset at the danger she's in. When was the last time the girls mentioned Tai?

... have they mentioned him since they left home?

The show has done a terrible job in the last couple of years of showing that these characters actually care for one another, beyond a superficial level, especially when all the cute friendship moments that function as filler are obliterated the moment one of them disagrees about something (see: Ren). There's no sense of place and little sense of real family, from Weiss doing multiple 180s with Whitley, to Blake being the only one who reacts to Yang's "death." It all rings so hollow. I'm supposed to believe that Ruby is still the one to inspire the world towards unity when she, at the point of her speech, still hasn't even tried to reconcile with Ozpin, has been betraying Ironwood this whole time, insta-turned on the Ace Ops for trying to make her face consequences for the crimes she knows she committed, fought her way into the kingdom because she didn't like the peaceful solution Cordovin offered (send Weiss), hasn't made mention of her father, collapsed over hearing her mother's name only to get over it seconds later, at this point in the volume barely interacts with her sister, and is leading a team whose attitude ranges from "Glares at Marrow for daring to suggest she works with anyone other than Yang" and "Points a weapon at her baby brother because she, apparently, can't even manage to work with a minor civilian family member." This is the team who is going to inspire Remnant to unify against Salem, the group who keeps not unifying with everyone they need to work with? There is a serious disconnect here. You can't tell the audience to "trust love" while failing to show basic love and support among the cast, and you can't try to make Ruby the poster child for unity when she has, since Volume 6, has consistently failed to unify with anyone: not Cordovin, not Qrow until he agreed to stop questioning her, not Ozpin, not Ironwood, not the Ace Ops, not even Robyn considering that was all Yang and Blake. Ruby's struggle right now is an inability to work with people who don't agree with her 100%, her biggest flaw is an all or nothing attitude, and the writing is failing to see how that might just be a problem when she's telling everyone else to put their differences aside to work together. Having Ruby actually try to connect with people more, worry about them, express love for them, etc. — both family and allies — would at least help soften this issue, but without it her characterization has severely tanked in terms of the compassion the show wants us to believe is still there.

[iconsumeheadcanons]

hello, for the WIP game.... "fanfic in my google docs? its more likely than you :/" and "theater food" :)

bro...bro..BRO you are getting large chucks of these bc im not sure if these will be finished/posted anytime soon..<3 ive gotten a lot of love today thank u so muchhh asldkfjaslkdfj i hope u enjoy!! here is all of ‘theater food’ and half of the first one

fanfic in my google docs? its more likely than you think :/

May 30th - 16:33 - Afterschool

Ren was still in the middle of hastily reading Futaba’s texts from hours ago when he opened the door to his family home and found his mother pacing in the genkan.

“...Mom, wha-?”

“I got a call from your school,” she says instead of hello. Ren freezes. Mona shifts in his bag. There’s silence for a second too long, but his mother quickly catches his tense posture and readjusts her approach. There haven’t been any arguments in a week and she doesn’t want to make this a new one.

“The counselor said you were fighting with a first-year,” she starts in a more inviting tone, but she tenses when she sees how quickly Ren’s cautious neutral face shifts into a frown.

“I-I just want to know what happened,” she says.

Ren releases an angry huff instead of turning around and leaving because he recognizes that his mother isn’t trying to jump to conclusions--that she trying to hear his side--but he still has hours worth of bad emotions at the forefront of his mind, so he kicks off his sneakers without undoing the laces and haphazardly drops them on the shoe rack before he allows himself to say anything.

Of course, because he is an angry idiot, his first response is: “There was no fight. It was just an argument,” and he snaps his mouth closed because that is exactly what a delinquent guilty of starting a fight would say and Makoto would be so disappointed in him right now. Morgana delivers her phantom message with a disapproving really, Joker?

His mother guiltily shifts her hands, one eyebrow twitching at Morgana’s muffled meow.

“I just used the words of the counselor,” she amends, gesturing for Ren to enter the family room. 

When they enter, she sits at one side of the rickety couch and pats the other seat. She smiles with some invitation, a dash of hesitance, and a sprinkle of uncertainty as if she has no clue how to speak to her teenage son. She looks at him sort of like he’s a child, but at least she doesn’t seem afraid of him like she was before Golden Week.

Ren joins her at the couch, releases Morgana on to the space between them so he doesn’t have to think about the distance, and conjures up how he can best explain the events of the morning in the least incriminating way (shouldn’t have to, he thinks, didn’t do nothing wrong in the first place) but his mother recognizes his thinking face before he can start.

“W-whatever you say, I’ll believe you, sweetie,” she encourages honestly. He can tell she means it because she tucks her hands in between her knees and tilts her legs in the picture perfect display of humble motherliness to hide how her legs would bounce otherwise. He turns to face her a bit, legs spread out and back slouched in a show of teenage indifference, despite his nervous right leg and the rhythmic flickers of light that bounce off of his phone case as he deftly spins his smartphone in his left hand.

“You mean that?” he can’t help but ask, belying his blase posture.

His mother nods with lips pursed, proving to her son that she has no intention of speaking over him. Emboldened yet reluctant, Ren begins the recount of his day at school.

theater food

    Ren slides into his seat while Hamuko and Ryuji chatter away about beef bowl places. Their enthusiastic discussion about cheap, fast, good food is not helping Ren’s patience or hunger. Usually Ren’s been in charge of the food prep because he’s the only one who knows how to make something all of the Thieves plus Hamuko will eat, but when they left Kamoshitty City today, Theodore pleasantly requested if he could make a recipe he’s been working on, which Hamuko had endorsed immediately.

    Ren agreed because Theodore is really hot and the thought of him buzzing around the kitchen is appealing enough, but around 40 minutes later, Ren is very hungry and is cursing his inability to disagree with tall hot people. To distract himself, he tries to brainstorm ways to free Haru and Makoto from Kamoshit-man’s unproportionately buff grasp, but his brain keeps snapping back to his teammates’ loud discussions and Theodore in a heart apron and himself in a cute pinafore sharing a festival smoothie--the romantic ones with the heart shaped straw--under the setting sun. He doesn’t even like smoothies.

    From the other corner of the weird theater lunch tables Futaba sends him a blank look that implies that she can hear his raging gay thoughts. Ren sticks his tongue out at her, and to Futaba’s left, Nagi raises a thin eyebrow and points at herself as though she thought he was talking to her. Embarrassed but never one to lose, Ren sticks out his tongue again at her paired with a flirtatious wink. At the head of the table beside Ren, Akechi makes a face. Futaba gags. Unaffected, Nagi returns her attention to Yusuke’s analysis of Hamuko’s preferred color palette for her hypothetical thief costume.

    Ren’s phone buzzes in his pocket, and he fishes it out, wondering how someone managed to text him while he’s in a magical dimension theater metaphor place. He quickly gives up that train thought when he sees Futaba’s SNS username. A quick glance up shows that she’s pointedly staring at her phone, so he swipes open the message.

wat did theo say he was making?

i hungr

idk

worried u wont like it?

duh

if hes anything like those tsuntsun twins he’ll probably poison it

...i didnt think of that

prolly not though. i mean hamuko trusts him

ur only saying that cuz hes a pretty boy 

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

for real though he wouldnt

The twins would without a doupt

*akechi voice* haha it was merely a jest!

DSKLFASLDKFSD STOP HES RIGHT

HES RIHGT NEXT TO ME ASSHOEL

    “Food’s ready!” Theodore announces over Ren and Futaba’s unsubtle snickers. Somehow, Theodore has acquired two shining serving platters.

    “Theo, you’re the best!” Hamuko says, standing up immediately to help him serve because she (and Haru) is the sweetest person in the universe.

    “Thanks,” Ren tacks on because he’s ‘in charge’ and he’s supposed to ‘set good examples’. He does not, however, stand up to help because he is lazy.

    The rest of the group is already chorusing thank yous and crowding around the food like hungry animals. Makoto is not around to tell them that they’re acting like children. Akechi is patiently waiting for everyone to get out of the way before he serves himself, which is probably a smarter idea than Ren who’s walking around the table so he can insert himself between Ann and Ryuji, the most destructive eaters of their current group. Yusuke, another main offender however justified, already has a bowl full of what appears to be noodles, veggies, and chicken covered in a savory sauce.

[bexterbex]

A Soul to Mend His Own | Ch. 60

Chapter 60 WHOOT WHOOT! 60 days ago I started this journey with only 2 followers, and now I have 337! I can’t thank you all enough 😭It means so much to me that you all like my little world. 

Warning, PLEASE CHECK TAGS IF YOU SEE SOMETHING YOU DON’T WANT TO READ THEN DON’T READ. Tag lists are closed

Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Will tag as I go along, Will update tags, Slow Burn, Influenced by Star Trek and other Sci-Fi themes, References to We Happy Few, Tons of References and quotes to George Orwells 1984 see if you can find them all, The First Order is the new Big Brother,  but who is really surprised, Blatant Nazi Symbolism, Interrogation Themes, Eventual Smut, Eventual Romance, Really just drawn out Slow Burn, Don’t repost without permission, Torture themes, Suggestive Themes, Execution themes, Disturbing Themes, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Verbal Abuse, Controlling Kylo Ren, Physical Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Kylo Ren is Not Nice, Kylo Ren Has Issues, Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, Possessive Kylo Ren, A character shamelessly based on Zelda

A Kylo Ren x Modern! Reader in a soulmate au with canon divergence. —————————————SLOWBURN————————————–

He is already the Supreme leader, searching the universe to find you, his Empress. Your name on his wrist has been the only constant in his life, while you have doubts about his existence and his acceptance of you. He isn’t in the database and why did the name Kylo Ren cover Ben Solo?

MASTERLIST

Chapter 60: First Lady

The general was waiting for you as you both sat down. Kylo and the general sat opposite of you. The lieutenant came up to join you. The general looked at Kylo, who nodded and began, “We are here to discuss your duties as First Lady of the First Order. An inaugural role that has not been done before in the history of the galaxy.”

He paused to make sure you were paying attention and understanding the gravity of the position. You nodded to signal him to continue.

“As the First Lady of the First Order, you have many duties, some more obvious than others. First, you act as the identity of the First Order, the face in which our people will rely upon and trust. You are the focus of unity and pride. The person who gives a sense of stability and continuity to the First Order. You are the official recognition for success and excellence. And you are to support the ideal of voluntary service.”

You were to be the complete face of the First Order. Not Kylo, who is hidden behind his mask, but you. “So you are asking me to be like the queen of England,” you asked trying to make sense of your role.

“Yes, in many ways, except you have actual power when you want it. While she is unable to make decisions for the United Kingdom in its entirety, as that power now belongs to parliament, you do. The only person who can override your decisions is the Supreme Leader himself.”

You watched as Kylo nodded along to what the general was saying.

“You shall be in charge of official First Order Social events like the formal dinner that we just had, and ceremonial events like commissioning of new destroyers and bases. You shall present titles of high honor within the First Order Military, and any civilian titles. You may also preside over military ceremonies such as remembrances of historic galactic battles, and major retirements.”

Your eyes grew wide at the list of things you would be responsible for. The general could see the look of hesitation on your face as you were processing everything.

“Of course you won’t have to do everything alone. You shall have a team of people to help you, one of which is the lieutenant,” he then gestured to Mitaka sitting next to you. “And a few others, you shall not have to handle everything yourself, but you will essentially be supervising it all. You will also be handling many correspondences which will go through your team, and you will be a patron of many charities. We will need to announce a charity today as a start. That is a decision we can make together, so you do not have to make it alone.”

You sat back in your chair as you started to process everything. Your life has shifted from working a 9-5 job, to doing very little with your time, to now being a head of state all in the matter of a month. Less than a month ago you were wondering who Kylo Ren was and now you were to be leading the largest government in the galaxy with him. Leading a group of people you had no idea existed. Being a face to the galaxy when you were perfectly content to just be friends with your match and living a life alone.

You felt his hold on your mind once more, the worry that you felt dissipated. You don’t know whether or not you should be comforted by this or horrified. He was in your mind messing with things.

‘There is nothing to be afraid of Kitten. You will do great. This is one of the big steps in becoming an empress, my empress.’

Something about the way he said that you would be his empress made your belly warm. A spark of desire to be something powerful to him.

You could feel his tendrils of hold swirling with that desire in your mind. Playing with it, caressing it. You closed your eyes at the feeling, your body welcoming the touch. The tiny rational portion of your mind was screaming, but the feeling was so nice that you ignored her.

You felt a hand touch your face, which shocked you out of your bliss. It was Kylo’s hand. His eyes told you that he was just as spellbound as you were.

Both the lieutenant and the general didn’t seem to know what to make of the moment as they both shared a confused face at both of your actions.

Kylo’s hand caressed your cheek before he withdrew it. His eyes never leaving yours. No words were spoken between you, not even in your mind, but you knew what just happened changed something.

You could almost hear the rational part of your brain whimper in pain at being ignored, whimper because of his grip on your consciousness. That rational part being afraid at what just occurred, but the rest of your existence being overjoyed at it. You could feel the tendrils recede slightly and the rational part slowly coming out of the corner that it had been backed into. Still very much afraid of the dark mass that just took over.

The general spoke first, “M’lady shall we go over what will need to be decided today?” He hesitantly looked between you and Kylo, trying to figure out your next course of action.

Without breaking eye contact with Kylo, you responded, “Yes. I think will be best.” You examined Kylo’s face as if it were a rare piece of art. Going over every last detail.

“We should decide what charity you should patron first. Is there anything, in particular, that strikes an interest in you m’lady? Any topic that you would prefer?” You could hear some unease in his voice as you failed to look at him. Your eyes still locked on Kylo.

You could feel the tendrils shift as a thought presented itself, “Something for abused or neglected children.” You watched as Kylo’s eyes phantom fluttered for a moment. His eyes then roaming your face as yours did his.

Both of your breathing is in sync. Two halves of a whole as his hold on your mind made itself at home. The tendrils tucking themselves in the corners of your skull, occasionally skimming your brain when needed, but mostly just there watching.  

“There are many orphanages throughout the galaxy shall I choose one for you,” asked Hux with his voice wavering. You could hear how uncomfortable the whole situation between you and Kylo was making him. You could not see nor hear the lieutenant, but you guessed that he was worse than the well-seasoned general.

Kylo answered for you, “Yes.”

You heard the general stand, “Well sir, m’lady we best be off to our luncheon. There is much to discuss.”

Kylo stood first, holding out his hand for you to take. Which you did. He then tucked your arm under his. Never breaking eye contact as you walked down the stairs and to the entrance of your chambers. You paused as Kylo put on his helmet, breaking your stare and trance. He then faced forward as you walked down the winding halls to the conference room.

You entered arm in arm with Kylo; he guided you to your seat, you never took your eyes off of him. Still enrapt in a trance. He walked with power around the room as he reached the head of the table where he chose to stand.

All around you were the High Command members, most of whom were holograms as they holocommuted in. Luckily for you, Pryde was also holocummuting in. You were relieved at his lack of physical presence. You also noted that there were several other officers standing along the opposite wall to you.

Kylo addressed the room, “Today is Lady Ren’s official first day as First Lady of the First Order,” he paused and you could hear a small applause coming from the High Command, both those who were physically present and those who weren’t. “She has many responsibilities in her new role, you are to do what she asks of you as if it was an order from me.”

You watched as chins raised in acknowledgment. You could see that some were not happy about having another person ruling over them. Kylo sensed this too as his head cut to an older male admiral, “I sense unease Admiral Berand.”

What shocked you was that the man wasn’t even here, he was holocommuting. Were Kylo’s Force abilities that strong?

“No, sir,” said the admiral.

You watched as Kylo marched around the room and came up next to the holo projection of the man. Even though they were technically a galaxy apart, the admiral shrank away from Kylo. “Good, keep your thoughts under control or I will do it for you.”

You could feel the tendrils in your own mind flex with excitement. They apparently wanted the admiral to mess up, so they could arrange his thoughts for him.

Kylo then spoke again addressing the room, “You have all given candidates for Lady Ren’s staff. Her chief of staff will be Dopheld Mitaka, now a captain, but there still remains her press secretary, correspondence secretary,  social secretary, her advisor, and her spokesperson. Five positions to fill. And after General Hux’s initial weeding of the candidates, there are 15 applicants. We shall now proceed with the filling of positions.” Kylo then gestured to the Allegiant General to start. Hux then waited patiently for your signal, waiting until you were ready.

You broke your gaze from staring at Kylo to look to your side. You gestured to Mitaka to come forward and join you by your side. Which he gladly did. You then nodded to the general to commence the application process.

You picked out your press secretary, social secretary, advisor, and spokesperson with ease. You took into account the opinions of Kylo, Hux and Mitaka. The final position of the correspondence secretary was being considered.

Unfortunately, Pryde’s recommendation was still in the running. The young officer that he had put forward as an applicant gave off similar vibes to the man himself. Almost a younger version of himself. You quickly denied his choice. The officer had a look of disappointment and anger on his face as he was forced to step back. You could tell your decision also displeased Pryde as you had a feeling that this officer was going to be some sort of informant to him.

Across the room, you could see Kylo’s body stiffen as he was probably monitoring both men’s thoughts. He barked at the officer to get out and to return to the Steadfast as he was no longer needed here. You watched as he left the room. He was the only rejected officer that was asked to leave before the meeting was over.

Next up was General Parnadee’s choice, a nice young lieutenant with a kind face. Parnadee introduced her, as the other generals did with their recommendations, “This is Lieutenant Amala Graven. She has an impeccable memory. The ability to recall voices and has a knack for routines. She is quiet but very decisive when it comes to printed languages. She has been my trusted personal secretary for two years and I can think of no one better for the position of correspondence secretary.”

From what you knew of Parnadee, even after entrusting your home planet to her, you knew that if she was recommending someone, especially someone, she trusts that you should highly consider the person. You then looked over her file, which was a clean record. She came highly recommended from the academy and she had been promoted quickly into Parnadee’s trusted and highly coveted secretary position.

After sharing a look with Mitaka, you made your decision. You looked at the female lieutenant in the eyes and said, “I believe you will make an excellent correspondence secretary and I would be honored if you would join my staff.”

The lieutenant thanked you and joined the group of others that had been selected. Your attention then shifted back to Kylo as he dismissed them and Mitaka while you were to have the luncheon portion of your meeting.

Everything went by rather smoothly after that, Hux telling those who holocommuted in that they were free to go as no official business was going to be discussed. You were thankful because you were sick of Pryde’s holo eyes watching your every move.

You watched as slowly every hologram was disconnected. Pryde getting in one last final creepy stare before disconnecting. You were relieved when Kylo took a seat next to you instead of his official unused one across from you.

You were in a large conference room filled with only a few generals and admirals. Lunch was served and Kylo relented in taking off his helmet so he could join you as you ate. Small pleasant discussions popped up around you. The Allegiant General giving his opinion here and there to the different conversations.

Meanwhile, you and Kylo ate in a comfortable silence between you two. There seemed no need to say anything as you could feel the tendrils exploring your mind. Seeing how far they could go before hitting a wall or turning around. You could feel them warmly caressing your happiest memories and completely covering those that caused you pain. You felt light-headed but in a way that didn’t make you sick, but as if a weight had been relieved from your consciousness.

You felt as if you could stay in this moment forever. But soon you would have your lesson with the general and soon you would have to move on with real life. But for now, you chose to be stuck in this moment. This little piece of forever.

A/N: Note that I see every comment and reblog w/ # and I love them so much! Tumblr is kinda hard to respond with just note that anything coming from @justanotherhockey-blog​ is from me!

[damn-stark]

Child of Ren Ch. 8

A/N- I like to think that the knights of Ren are like a motorcycle gang. I love em even if we got such little screen time with them :/ anyway hope you guys liked this chapter, I enjoyed writing it, take care out there and leave your thoughts below :)

Warning- swearing, angst, Poe fluff, Slow burn, another long chapter.

Pairing- Poe Dameron x Reader x Rey, Kylo Ren x Reader (platonic)

Takes place- after TLJ & before TROS

(Let me know if you want to be tagged)

———

“Alright, what do you see hon?” Poe asks just above a whisper over the Comlink

You scan the street once again, taking in the busy city street. Scum, thief’s, vendors and some nice civilians scattered every so often but that was rare, especially so low in Coruscant. The lower you got in the city, the more danger you were put in, especially when it came to you.

“Stormtroopers scattered all around the streets, but beside that just the normal scum.” You sigh pulling away your rifle blaster albeit not your own but one borrowed from base— you push yourself to your feet. “Theirs cameras hidden in every other building, the stormtroopers here you can pay off, but the people not so much. One sight of me and the whole lower level is after us.”

“You know as much as I don’t trust y/n, at least her contact wasn’t in Coruscant.” Finn complained over the comlink, making Poe sigh loudly and practically hear his eyes roll.

You can’t help but let out a small chuckle before jumping down to a lower level of the building and once again scanning the area, pulling your scarf over the lower half of your face to attempt to hide as much of yourself as you could. “I’m just warning that if die here or get captured their will be hell to pay.”

Poe lets out a genuine laugh, the cockiness behind his voice clearly heard over the comlink, “well if you’re scared you can hold my hand, I promise I won’t let go.”

You smile under your scarf and can’t help but roll your eyes in a lighthearted way, for a moment just thinking of accepting his offer.

“Pfft scared, me? Have you met me? you can hold my hand if you’re scared.” You dismiss his offer and zoom in closer to the busy street, keeping a watchful eye for anything or anyone suspicious.

“I’m not scared, but I might just take you up on that offer sweetheart.” He says with the same amount of cockiness or even more than before.

“Focus, what else do you see y/n?” Finn questions sharply, all sort of amusement disappeared from your face. You didn’t need him to tell you what to do, you were already doing it, you could multitask. You were trained by Kylo Ren and the Knights of Ren after all; but of course he didn’t know that. Neither of them did.

“More and more stormtroopers, all heavily armed and armored. We need to be extremely careful, theirs in no doubt also Bounty Hunters hidden among the crowd. And theirs no doubt they’re all here looking for me. Hoping to catch me for the reward.” You informed them both as you got up and secured your weapon behind your back, taking in a deep breath before jumping down into the alleyway.

“You can use the force.” Finn pointed out, almost like he was informing you on what you could do.

“Yes, I can, but one can never be too cautious. Looking over your shoulder has to become second nature. Learn that.”

“Has anyone told you that you’re overly paranoid?”

You muster up a small laugh as you shake your head, “not directly, why? Have you heard something?”

“Focus. No distractions, no talking to anyone, we just walk to our destination, get what we’re here for and leave. We can’t risk being seen.” Poe announces cutting the conversation Finn and you were having as they both climbed down into the poorly lit alleyway with you. “The person I know isn’t far from here, if we hurry we’ll get there quick.”

You respond with a small nod before pulling your hoodie over your head—moments like these were the times where you really missed your helmet.

“How do you even know this person, Poe? Sounds sketchy if you ask me.” Finn expresses to his friend, the same thought you also had. You never pegged Poe as the type to deal with..shady people, always more of a person that always walks on the right side and never the bad—Who knows? even if he did, you’re no one to judge his past.

Poe stays silent as he walks ahead, leading Finn and you before answering, “it doesn’t matter.” He answers rather bluntly, his tone in voice saying in all forms to drop it and ask no questions. Perhaps he’s just as shady or even more than you.

—

Wanted posters of you were decorating every wall, all saying the same thing ‘EXTREMELY DANGEROUS’ and ‘BRING TO THE FIRST ORDER UNINJURED’. It caused you to be paranoid, for your eyes to catch every small movement anyone made as you moved past them. No one could recognize you if you remained disguised, but that still didn’t mean that someone could or would at any moment if they stared for a moment too long.

“Damn hon, theirs posters of you everywhere, what did you do? who are you? A daughter of some important senator or King?” Poe questioned curiously as his eyes moved past yet another one of your posters.

You sigh nervously, “something like that.” You avoid Finn’s curious stare, focusing on yet another poster of yourself. This one catching your eye more than the others one had. You move your eyes back to see if Finn was still looking back at you, he wasn’t. Using that as your opportunity you fell out of line and moved towards the poster, your eyes fixated on the poster.

Once you finally reached the wall with the poster, you ripped the poster from the wall, your eyes widening as you saw something familiar drawn on your mugshot. A scar....just like Kylo’s. Your breath hitched and you gripped onto the poster, wrinkling the corner with a firm hold. Their was a form of similarity to the picture of you and him, if he was placed alongside it; the glare, the frown, the way you tried to project yourself as fearless and with no emotion, when in fact you—neither of you were anything but that. And yet it was a similarity that you couldn’t accept, one you tried to deny. One being that he wasn’t even related to you by blood and two..well..two being that you couldn’t accept that you were like him.

“Ren.”

Instantly your whole body stiffens at the sound of that name, your breath catching in your throat and fear slowly seeping through.

“Turn around. I can’t see you, but I can feel you.” The same voice says, making you spin around to try and spot the location of the voice, your eyes frantically searching the crowd for who it could be. “Don’t try and see me, feel me.” The voice projects louder. You hesitate and think of just running off to catch up with Poe and Finn, but before you could attempt to do so the voice called again; “I sense your hesitation. Don’t worry, you can trust me. After all I have a truth you seek.”

Poe said no distractions. This was currently one. A big one. You attempt to move away but as you take a step away you can’t help but reach out with the force, your curiosity getting the best of you. You continue moving, unconsciously going the wrong way, instead of going to find the guys, you’re moving towards the voice. The energy of the being growing stronger and stronger until—there. Finally coming to a stop in front of a door-less building, the violet light inside shining in a soft and almost calming hue.

A sound of someone shuffling inside, made your eyes follow the sound until you spotted a small blue Ardennian sentient. Your eyes searched the place and the sentient, looking for any sign of this being any sort of trap. Their was an urge to just leave, but then the sentient said something that fully caught your attention, “Y/N, daughter of Kylo. Please come in.”

Your eyebrows furrow at the sound of the comment, not having the energy the correct the sentient or ask how it knew your name. Either way your hesitation returned; “I should find my friends.” You speak slowly, your eyes heavily trained on the sentient before you turned them towards the exit, “they’re probably worried.” You move out the exit, but again you’re stopped.

“I see beyond what’s hidden and meant to be hidden. Truths. Pasts. Stories long forgotten. Flickers of futures.”

Your breath hitches whilst you remove the hood from your head and pull the scarf down, missing the way passing people looked at you. Before you turn to the sentient, your curiosity for your own hidden truths blinded you from thinking straight. Slowly you move towards where the sentient is seated, the curtain beads hanging from the ceiling lightly hitting one another as you moved through them.

Carefully you take a seat in front of the sentient, “what do you know?” You question it, the sentient showing a proud smile. It’s lips part to say something, but it quickly closes them, it’s white milky eyes rolling past your shoulder.

“Y/N! There you are!” You hear Poe exclaim frantically as both Finn and him walk inside. “I was worried. What the hell happened?” you look over your shoulder, and see him already close behind you, his hand wrapping around your arm to pull you to your feet. His eyes fall on the sentient and then the small blanket covered table, instantly getting the idea of what was going on; “it’s all a scam, just after your credits. Let’s go.” He whispers in your ear, offering the sentient a feigned smile as he began to pull you away.

“Not a scam. Anything but that...Commander Dameron.”

Poe and Finn stop moving, both looking at one another wide eyed after hearing information not given.

“Kyber crystals are priceless gems...luckily for you I don’t want what you hold, I just seek y/n’s full given attention.” The voice says. Quickly you pull away from Poe’s grasp and move back to your seat, the sentient once again smiling proudly and knowing. “I know what you seek. A past forgotten.”

You offer a quick nod, “yes. Can you tell me? Tell me who I am?” You speak softly, your voice giving off emotions not expressed on your face.

“Y/N, we don’t have time for this, let’s go.” Poe says to you as he comes behind you again, attempting to pull you back up, only for you to pull away and shoot him a glare.

“Just wait.” You hiss before turning your attention back to the sentient.

The sentient grabs your hands and slightly tilts it head to the side, the white milky in its eyes seeming to whirl as it talked “Child, what you seek is a past not meant to be remembered,” your lips part in disbelief, your eyes beginning to sting with tears, “what you seek you already found, it lies before you. Just let the light shine through to see clearly, when you do that’s when you’ll finally know.” You pull your hands away from the sentient and swallow thickly, your jaw and fists clenching tightly, as you get up to leave the sentient finishes, “but if you really seek who you were before, than that will be revealed soon enough.”

You respond with silence, pulling your hood and scarf back on. The answers you truly seeked not at all what you wanted to hear. It broke your heart, but you didn’t express such emotion, instead your eyes slid to Poe, “let’s go.”

As you move to storm out of the building the sentient says one more thing, one thing that really pisses you off in more ways than one, “let your past die.” Without another word you storm out, letting anger build up inside you, instead of letting your heartache seep and take over. Instead of getting the answers you wanted you were left with more questions.

As you noticed that you still carried your wanted poster from before, you looked down at it, a single tear escaping from you and hitting the poster.

Poe fell to your side, eyeing the poster before turning to look at you with a sympathetic look, “Y/N—”

“Just.” You pause as you catch sound of your own sharp voice. You let out sigh before balling the poster in your hand; “we’re almost arriving to your contacts location?”

“Y-yes.”

“Let’s hurry then.”

—

In a careful movement you tie the end of the delicate side braid that you took too long to do, carefully letting it rest on your shoulder as a small almost invisible smile grows on your lips at your job well done—considering that you weren’t used to braiding your own hair. At all.

A silent exhausted sigh escapes your lips as you lean in on the balcony, fidgeting with the violet kyber crystal in your hand. What the “all too knowing” sentient had said about what you seeked, only left more questions about yourself than before, and left you with no information on who you really were. When that’s all you really wanted, just who you were. But no, it gave you nothing but anger and some a deep saying that you didn’t understand.

All you wanted to do now was just leave, and be by yourself in the deep jungle, just your thoughts and you, but alas you couldn’t get that either as you waited for Poe’s contact to give you all the fuel you came here for. And as for being alone well that was short lived as you heard heavy hesitant footsteps come behind you, getting louder until they stopped beside you. And for some apparent reason your fragile mind thought it was Kylo who stood at your side, but you knew it wasn’t, but for some reason your mind instantly came to that conclusion, perhaps it was the boots? Right?

You didn’t have to look to your side to know that it was actually Poe next to you. His hesitance known not only by his sigh but the energy you read off of him.

His eyes travel your face, unknowingly lighting up as he saw you; “your hair...it’s picked up. It looks nice.” He compliments, making you hide your blush that began to grow, he then cleared his throat, “anyway, I’m sorry my friend is making us wait. Should be back with the fuel soon.” He quietly mentioned, still very hesitant as if almost scared to talk to you after what you had heard with the sentient.

You gnaw at your bottom lip before turning your head to the side and face him, “it’s alright.” You pause and show a feigned smile, “you’re lucky I’m a very patient person.”

Instead of responding with a small laugh or a smile, like you expected him too, he responded with a sympathetic look almost like he saw right through you.

“You okay?” He asks, and with that simple question it takes everything within you not to breakdown in front of him.

You simply nod, while you bite down on your bottom lip and turn away from him. “Yeah...I’m fine.”

He looks at you with a perplexed look, hesitance once again overriding his emotions. “I just—what the sentient said, just seemed to bum you out.” He struggled to say.

You sigh and stare down at your kyber crystal, “I’ll be fine,” again you pause. “I just wanted to know more and well I didn’t so...I’ll be fine.” You feel the confusion within him, the hesitance to ask something else. Scared that you might just turn him away and leave the conversation when he wanted to know more of the stranger within you. Knowing and feeling that within him, you turn your body to your side, facing him while still leaning on the balcony. You hesitate this time, but still manage to speak a little bit more of what he didn’t know about you.

“My past is complicated and something I’m not proud of, but also something I couldn’t control.” You inhale deeply and struggle to say what you were going to say next, while also carefully walking around revealing anything about your real identity, “I loved and trusted the wrong person. He left my heart and my mind broken..” you remain silent and keep your eyes on anything but him, as you tried not to cry in front of him.

He nods slowly, silence overcoming the both of you as his mind ran over what to say. Overthinking the thought of having been unknowingly pushy. He didn’t mean to at all, but as he saw how your face drop when you talked about that mysterious person he couldn’t help but feel bad for overstepping.

“I didn’t mean to. I didn’t want to overstep I’m sorry-”

“Its okay, really. I just..,” you don’t know what brings you to reveal your emotions, insecurities that you’ve had a hard time accepting to yourself since everything with Kylo went down; “I just-just feel lost...I don’t know, on who I am or am meant to be. The people I was with before took that away from me, the possibility of being my own person,” you pause and take a shaky deep breath, “And joining the resistance has been hard, I thought I was going to feel different, find myself, but I just feel like I’m not doing anything, I feel like I’m..” You blink slowly, your eyes flooding with tears, “..not worth anything there, like I’m just in the way; but I have nowhere else to go, the only home I knew before, well, he just isn’t that anymore.” Hot tears finally escape your eyes, unwillingly but they do.

You let out a shaky deep breath and finally drift your eyes to meet his gaze, showing emotions you never thought you’d show him any time soon. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to overshare, I’m sorry.” You turn away again while wiping away the tears that wouldn’t stop flowing. Poe takes a deep breath, taking a moment to come up with the right answer. Knowing that if he said the wrong thing it could hurt you more, and well he didn’t want that. He was having a hard time seeing you so upset and vulnerable in front of him, he just didn’t want to ruin the trust you clearly had for him with a terrible answer.

“You are worth something to me...and you know clearly Rey, never let someone make you feel that way because you are worth something. It takes a while to know who you are, you’re young, you’ll know soon.” Carefully he slides his hand to place it on-top of yours, waiting a moment to make sure you were fine with said interaction, and when he saw that you only moved to sit up straight and didn’t pull away, he interlaced his fingers with yours, once again pulling your gaze to meet his; “and as far as being in the way? You’re not. You’re helping the resistance in more ways than you know, you have a home there, you always will.” He says carefully, offering you a sincere and assuring look, leaving the conversation at that and asking no further questions, even if he really wanted too.

He just wanted to know if the mysterious person you talked about before was some boyfriend or even husband he needed to look out for—but again you were too young to have been married, and well you carried no ring so it couldn’t be that. Perhaps a boyfriend? Or preferably ex-boyfriend. Even then all that didn’t matter at the moment, all that mattered was you. None of that was his business and if you wanted to tell him then you would. Hopefully. But as of now all that mattered was comforting you as best as he could.

So, carefully he brought his other hand up, wiping the tears from your cheeks, a small warm assuring smile decorating his features; “you might be a little mean, but it’s cute.” He continued saying, with a hint of cockiness behind his tone, before turning sincere once more; “But worthless? Far from it hon.” He moves his hand so he can completely cup your cheek, gently caressing it with his thumb.

A warm and shy smile finally grows on your lips for a second before if falters and you’re remembered of something, “I-I just...who I was before—you just won’t think of me the same—”

“Y/N, it doesn’t matter. I’ve done things I regret, but the best thing is not to dwell on them.”

He won’t think the same way when he knows who you really are. As much as he says the opposite right now. But you don’t argue against that as of now, all you do now is smile. It doesn’t quite reach your eyes, but it’s sincere especially after what he said.

He smiles in return, his eyes traveling away from your own to travel down at your lips before flickering them up again. You do the same as him, this time he leans in closer, stopping so his nose brushed against your own. You swallow back nervously, your eyes once again flickering down to his lips before blinking to meet his hooded gaze. Seconds later you ease into his touch, shoving your necklace in your coat pocket before bringing your other hand to place it on top of the one he had on your cheek, gently caressing his knuckles with your own thumb.

The only sound you could hear was each other’s slow breathing, a breathing that gradually picked up at the moment you two were sharing, at the feeling of your heart fluttering and a warm feeling down in the pit of your stomach. This same moment caused you to ignore the sudden familiar presence you felt through the force. It was strong but something you ignored because of the moment. You then slightly part your lips as you move closer, shutting your eyes as you do, your lips brushing against his own soft ones...

“The fuels here.” Finn suddenly announces, quickly making Poe and you part away. Your cheeks burning but still remaining calm as you tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear, unlike poor Poe, who struggled for a moment, clearing his throat to try and ease the awkward situation this just turned into. His eyes only expressing fast emotions on the sudden and unwanted interruption. He had been so close and just like that it was ruined. He couldn’t necessarily blame his friend because one he didn’t know and two....well there was no excuse for two. He was upset that Finn had walked in at the wrong time.

Poe tried to play it off cool but he had failed at showing such attempt, moving past Finn with one quick glance, “Yeah, okay. We’re going.”

—

Collecting the fuel was surprisingly easy, something that Poe didn’t let live down. Comparing his friend with yours— at least Zater provided you with a secret exit, as bad as he was.

“Why do we have to walk all the way back? We couldn’t we have gotten a ride or I don’t know some speeder bikes, huh?” You groaned.

Poe sighed in annoyance, “BB8 is bringing your ship closer, we’re not walking all the way. But if you keep complaining then it will seem longer.”

You only let out a small hmph and continue walking.

“Aren’t you supposed be some trained assassin or something like that? Isn’t walking just below you?” Finn questioned from behind you.

You bring your finger up to correct him but before you could, their was that familiar presence again, stronger than before. You shift your head from side to side, trying to locate where the presence felt the strongest. You quicken your pace, shoving past the crowd of people, your eyes frantically searching past bodies, all the while your heart quickened in your chest and beads of sweat formed on your forehead, anxiety growing within you on who it could possibly be.

The presence only felt stronger the closer you got, and yet no one was seen, you keep shoving past people, maneuvering past hagglers and stands, the sounds of Poe calling you seeming to be heard in the back of your head. It’s not until you see a flash of black right ahead that you halt in your steps, your breath catching in your throat and your heart seeming to drop.

The sudden hand on your wrists pulls you out of your stupor. Realizing that it’s only Poe your shoulders drop, but quickly you put your guard up as you see a tall figure in all black stop a few feet away.

“Ky—” your whole face drops as you realize that it’s not the person who you were thinking it was, but yet someone else completely, probably equally as bad or even more. “Trudgen.” You mouth, moving your hand to fully grip onto Poe’s, guiding him to the nearest alleyway to move past the Knights of Ren, taking advantage that they hadn’t seen you yet.

“What’s going on?” Poe asked frantically, confused on your sudden action.

You don’t stop moving and look for the quickest way around to circle back to the ship, “the knights of Ren. They’re here.” You only look over your shoulder to double check that Finn is following.

Both Finn and Poe gasp at the revelation, Poe’s hand never leaving yours.

“Walking's not going to work anymore.” Quickly you remove your hood and your scarf, your eyes quickly searching for any form of transportation, until there. In the next street were a couple of speeder bikes that you were going to...borrow. “Let’s get on the speeder bikes, they won’t take long to find me.” Surprisingly neither man argues against your suggestion and hop onto the speeder bikes just like you. And as soon you do, you see Trudgen, Cardo and Ushar round the corner, their step quickening as they finally spot you.

Without any hesitance you rev up the bike and try and make a hasty escape back to the ship, ignoring the calls from the owners of the bikes, “you two better keep up!” You shout over your shoulder to both Poe and Finn, very carefully swerving past people diving out of your way. Looking over your shoulder you spot the knights already on speeder bikes of their own, so, in a quick solution you make a sharp right turn into underground train tunnel, jumping down into the rails and moving through the tunnel, immediately feeling Finn’s hesitance and Poe’s excitement but also a small amount of fear because of where you were currently riding in.

“Poe, Finn I need you both to speed up, get out of the tunnels and make it to the ship!” You command loudly.

“What about you?! We can’t just leave you!” Poe argues as he rides at your side.

“I’ll catch up, I just need to get them away until you guys find me.” You leave no room for arguments and suddenly slam on the brakes, Poe looks over his shoulder and you immediately see his glare for your actions and decision, not at all agreeing with it but following them nonetheless.

Making sure Finn and Poe were out of the tunnels you continue racing down the tunnel, picking up your speed only for the knights to catch up as well. Even if their face was hidden behind their masks, you knew that they were smug about what was currently going on with them chasing after you.

“Boys!” You salute them as they ride beside you, causing them to all too quickly try to make you lose balance on your bike to capture you. But at sight of them right next you is when you realized that it was just three of them riding beside you and not six. Shit. Kuruk, Ap’Lek and Vicrul were missing. Not good. At all.

In attempts to contact Poe and warn him on the three missing knights, that were most likely out there chasing them, you got out your comlink and try and talk to Poe, but the comlink was suddenly flown out of your hand and left behind in the rails. You shoot Trudgen a cold glare and all he responds with is a tilt of his head and a quick shrug. Cardo suddenly tries to slash your bike, but at the last second you manage to swerve out of the way, and kick Ushar off of his bike to move to the side and out of the tunnels as you see a trains headlights shining ahead.

Once you make out of the tunnels you go back to the busy streets, swerving past people and mentally apologizing to them. A loud groan leaves your lips as you see Ushar and the other two knights pop out of the tunnels, all alive and well...yay. Anyhow you force pull Ushar’s Vibromachete to your hand, and don’t double think to swing at any of them as they ride beside you. As Trudgen ducks your swing he pulls out his Vibrocleaver and swings at your legs, but you manage to swerve, avoiding his swing. You smirk at his failed attempt, but the smirk doesn’t last long as you spot Poe appear from an alleyway.

“What are you doing?! I told you to go—”

He quirked his eyebrow and shot you a cocky half grin, “I wasn’t going to let you have all the fun!”

You shook your head and rolled your eyes, all the while you bit back your smile, a smile that didn’t last as Ushar uses his club to blast your speeder bike, causing you to lose control and fall off your speeder— you groan as you roll on the ground, landing on your back to only groan more

“Ow.” You groan, well that was going to hurt more the next morning—quickly you jump to your feet, ignoring the pain from your scrapes. Poe sees what happened and tries to help you, but you motion him to just continue riding forward, however he doesn’t and neither do the Knights. “Stubborn men. All of them.” You hiss.

All four of them make a sharp U-turn and ride towards you. You only grimace and begin to sprint towards them, a smirk growing on your lips as you see Ushar ride towards you in a faster speed. As he’s just a few inches away you quickly grab his speeder bikes handle whilst you shove him off, flipping the bike over as you swiftly swing your body over and land on the seat and ride towards the ship. Poe sees what you did and only stares wide-eyed and impressed, his mouth agape before he has to turn and chase after you.

Finally the ship comes to view, albeit you didn’t know if it was Finn and BB8 or the other three Knights. Hopefully the two you had came with though—the ramp opens and you wave Poe to speed ahead of you as you manage to slash Cardos bike and make him crash to the wall, only having Trudgen ride at your left side. As you try and cut him off, a blast flies his way, hitting his speeder bike perfectly; you snap your head to see Finn with a blaster in his hand. It takes all your will not to smile at his successful hit. Alas it’s your turn to get on the ship and finally leave this city planet, so as you try and do so, Poe already has his hand outstretched to you, his face contorting into one of worry and anxiety as he sees you jump onto your speeders seat.

You try and keep your breaths slow and steady as you take step forward and onto the handle bars, your hand already outstretched to Poe. He keeps mouthing ‘come on’ to you as he feels his heart race in his chest, in both still very impressed and scared for how this jump could turn out. You lean forward and push down on your feet, before jumping off the bike and towards the ship just a few feet away. You feel your fingers graze Poe’s and as he was about to wrap his hand around yours, you were shot and pulled back harshly. “NO!” Your eyes go wide and in a blink of an eye you crash on the ground, your eyesight fading to black and your head pounding sharply.

The last thing you see is Trudgen pick you up before it all goes to black.

—

“Ughh.” You moan lightly, your eyes fluttering open, “the hell?” You groan as you begin to feel pain at the side of your head, and well your whole body really. With very precise caution you slowly sit up, grabbing the side of your head and wincing all in the same while. Instantly you’re met by Ap’Lek’s skull like helmet in your face. You pull back and your face scrunch’s up; “shit Ap’Lek your face scared the hell out of me.”

“You can’t see my face.” Ap’Lek rebutted in a low grainy voice—no thanks to his helmet.

You simply shrug and shoot him an icy glare, “all the same. It’s still ugly.”

Before he could answer, snickering is heard entering the same space you were in. “Little y/n, I see that the rebels haven’t changed the good part of you. Thank the maker. Am I right boys?” Trudgen comes up beside Ap’Lek. “We’ve missed you, little sister.” You shoot him a deadlier glare, before standing up inches before him, you try and take the blade that hung from his belt, but you soon figure out that you’re chained up. “Sorry, precautions. You understand, right? I’ll let you go when we get to Kylo.”

You sit back down and scan the dark area, finally your mind capturing where you were, the ‘Night Buzzard’ great. Quickly your mind begins to go into panic as you realize you’re alone and that you’re missing two other rebels. Trudgen notices the panic in your eyes and tilts his head slightly to the side, and clasps his hands behind his back. “Don’t worry, the rebels you came with, are here...not for long though.” He snickered making you jump up to attack him, but only to be aggressively pushed back down. With a simple wave, Ushar comes in with Poe and Finn in cuffs, and seeming to be unharmed. Thank the stars.

“Y/N! are you okay?!” Poe begins, but quickly he’s shut up by a harsh pull down. You part your lips to protest but then Trudgen begins to click his tongue, pacing back and forth menacingly, obviously something on his mind.

“Who knew our little y/n could be friends with scum such as you two, hmm?” He crouch’s down in front of Poe and Finn, on obvious smirk hidden behind his helmet; “you know before she used to relish in killing people such as yourselves.” The boys only looked up at him confused on how he knew such information about you. You shuffle in your seat uncomfortably, something Trudgen notices and huffs out in amusement.

“Before. Keyword before. Before I knew what the first order did to me.” You hiss, leaning forward with a narrowed look, “before I found out you killed my mother.” The words slipped out your mouth, part of you forgetting Finn and Poe were here as your anger quickly grew. An anger that you didn’t care if it got out of control, all so The Knights of Ren payed for what they did.

Trudgen pushes himself to his full height and stands in the middle, watching you carefully before speaking, “mother? kid, you don’t have one or don’t you remember she abandoned you.”

You shake your head, “no, that’s all fake, I know now. You’re all liars. You killed my mother.” Poe and Finn just watch the scene playout, neither wanting to get in-between the drama and obvious history with the knights and you.

“Me? No I couldn’t have.” Trudgen shakes his head, placing a hand where his chin would be. “You know what,” he points to you, “actually I do remember something, little y/n and a pretty women...ahh yes now I remember. It was actually Ushar who killed your pretty mother.” Your eyes go wide and you jump to your feet, your head snapping to Ushar just a few feet away. He only shrugs like if it was just something ordinary and common, like it was nothing. It wasn’t nothing to you. Quickly with the anger within you and the built up revenge you run towards him, flipping over him and wrapping your chains around his throat, wrapping your legs around his waist to get a better hold, whilst pulling tighter and making him struggle to pull you off of him.

Ap’Lek, Cardo and Vicrul watch in amusement, while Poe and Finn have no choice but watch these events unfold, neither of them knowing how to react. After a couple minutes Trudgen claps his hands and let’s out a feigned laugh. “Okay enough! That’s no way to treat your brothers in front of our guest y/n, you know that. Kylo’s taught you better.” Trudgen says as he breaks the hold you have on Ushar and flings you off to the wall using the force. “Sorry, she takes after her father in her...anger.” As soon as Trudgen notices once again the confused reaction Poe and Finn give him (mostly Poe) at the revelation, Trudgen nods his head and walks to you, grabbing your arm to pull you to your feet. “You haven’t told them?” He asks in too much amusement.

He notices your silence and change in demeanor, the way you kept your eyes down instead of on your friends, finding his answer. You swear you can see his grin shine through his black helmet as he takes too much joy before revealing something you were too scared to. “Listen and rejoice, for you are in the presence of blah blah whatever they say— anyway Your little friend here is none other then Y/N Ren! Daughter to our Master Kylo Ren,” he pauses and wraps his hand around your chin to make sure you were looking at your friends; “or as you may know her, The great Child of Ren!”

You quickly rip away from his grip, not before noticing the way Poe’s reaction was; his mouth agape, his eyes wide in bewilderment, confusion and realization..maybe hints of betrayal? you wouldn’t know though, you didn’t have the will to read more to his reaction as you felt hurt that he had to find out the horrible person you were before. Finn though, his reaction was less surprised like the news weren’t news at all, it was like something he already seemed to know.

Trudgen then turns to Poe and Finn, “don’t blame little y/n for keeping such a secret, after all she takes after her father in that. And well brainwashing has got to do something to your head, doesn’t it y/n?” Trudgen continues with a taunting tone, making sure you were listening.

“He’s not my father! And never will be!” You growl.

Trudgen brings his hands up feigning innocence, “Oh, haha okay sorry, correction stepfather.” he pronounces the last words slowly, knowing that the words were hurting you; “anyway. Are you going to introduces your brothers to your friends? Or should they introduce themselves, one by one, hmm?”

“You’re not my brothers.” You grimace, making Trudgen put a hand on his chest, faking to be hurt by your words. “Ouch, that one hurt. After all we’ve done? You have to know that killing your mother was just us following orders, you understand that right? No hard feelings?” Kylo said the same thing...just following orders. Perhaps you didn’t have the same love for the knights of Ren like you had for Kylo, but that still didn’t mean you didn’t care for them, they were like family to you after all.

Taking your silence as an answer he moved next to Ushar by the doorway; “anyhow, enough chit chat, we have work to do.” Again he turns to you and this time he gets a vibroblade from his belt and throws it to you so you could catch it. “We’re taking the traitor here back to base.” He turns to face Finn, his smirk heard through his voice, “they’ll love having you back home, just like little y/n here.” He then turns back to you, placing his hands on his hips, “now about this rebel and his droid companion,” he points to Poe and a poor deactivated BB8, “do you want to kill him? Or should Ushar here? You know he enjoys that stuff.”

Without a second thought you charge towards both Ushar and Trudgen, swaying the vibroblade close to their throats, “touch them and I’ll kill you both.” You threaten them, a hard glare meant for them both. “Just let them leave” You glance back to Poe, before focusing on the two men in front of you; feeling your heart shatter in your chest for what you were going to propose, “let both of them leave, the droid too. Let them leave and...I’ll go back home without a fight.” You swallow thickly, trying hard not to let your demeanor drop and show how upset you really were at the thought of returning, but if it meant that Poe, BB8 and Finn were going to be fine then it wouldn’t matter, you would do it again in a heart beat; “please.”

Trudgen turns to Ushar and then to the other three, silently agreeing to an answer amongst themselves. Ushar simply shrugs his shoulders and that’s all Trudgen needed to pull the vibroblade from your hand and turn you to face Poe and Finn...one last time. “Only because you asked nicely.” He whispered to you, “we’re only letting all of you leave, because it was by the mercy of the ever so great Child of Ren.”

Poe opens his mouth to say something against your decision, the confliction he felt seeping through his facial expression, and as he was going to speak you interrupted him; “don’t come back for me Poe. Don’t. Please don’t.” You beg, your voice cracking as you struggled not to cry. Poe doesn’t say anything and stays quiet, keeping his eyes locked on yours before you turned away.

“Might want to kiss her goodbye, chance is she isn’t going to remember any of you when you run into each other again.” Trudgen tugs you towards Poe and Finn, raising your face to them, “no? No goodbye kiss?” He grips onto your cheeks tighter and turns you directly to Poe, “you? I know you want too.” He waits for a moment and forces you closer. Poe looks down at you, but you can’t find the nerve to meet his eyes, too afraid of reading hate in him after finding out who you were, you only mouth ‘I’m sorry”, before you were pulled back. “No? Good lad. Who knows what might’ve happened, you know, we’re just protective over little y/n.” He pushes you back so Ap’Lek could catch you in his arms.

Trudgen then instructs Kuruk to open the ramp, following by uncuffing Finn and Poe and pushing a deactivated BB8 off the ramp and to the open ramp of the ship you came on. “Bye boys, thanks for taking care of y/n. Hope she at least remembers one of you after her head gets put back in the blender.”

Poe glances at you one last time and this time you meet his gaze. His eyes frantically search your own for a sign of this being a distraction so you could escape, but as soon as he noticed you stay still and shake your head, he knew it wasn’t. He hesitated but he continued walking until he got on his ship, he stares at you longingly before closing the ramp, his figure slowly disappearing until the ramp door covered him completely.

A shaky sigh escaped your lips as you saw the ship fly away. Their was no doubt in your mind that the choice was the right one, making them leave was the right choice, you couldn’t bear with yourself if they died because of you. Telling them to not come back for your was...the right choice—why would either of them want too anyway, after they found out the truth. You were a horrible person and you knew they thought that, your mind had to keep thinking that, keep thinking that they hated you...that Poe hated you for what you hid. Thinking that helped with your hope of him coming to take you back, him coming to stop you from returning back to the first order. You didn’t want them—didn’t want him too, and yet you hoped he would.

But he wasn’t going to rescue you. He wasn’t going to stop you from going back...

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A/N- so tell me do you guys want Poe to be mad at reader for hiding who she really was?? or do you guys want him to be understanding??

Tagged- @jennibradley​ , @xxrouge-lexxx​ , @daniellajocelyn​ , @tweedlydumbtweedlydoo​ , @star-marvel-fangirl​ , @leilei-draws​ , @briesangel @lanatheawesome , @madamepsicose, @constantdisgrace​ , @1-800-depressedlesbian, @commondazy , @logiclies , @robindoesntloveme , @we-all-are-strange , @fandom-addict-aesthetics

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Almost Lover: Part 5 - Xavier Plympton Imagine

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Y/N almost jumped out of her skin when Brooke came rushing through the front door, covered in mud and screaming bloody murder.

“He’s trying to kill me! It was Mr Jingles, it was him!” Brooke cried, as she ran over to the back door to lock it.

Y/N gulped as Trevor, a crowbar in hand and Chet bravely made their way to the front door and ripped it open.

“No, no! He’s right outside!” Brooke screamed, as the boys leaned out and looked around.

“I don’t see anything. There’s nobody out here!” Trevor exclaimed, as he shon his light towards the forest.

“Jesus...” Y/N mumbled, breathing a sigh of relief.

It was then that she realised at some point she must have grabbed Xavier’s hand, as she felt his warm palm against her own. Xavier seemed to recognise this as well, as he quickly pulled his hand away, much to Y/N’s disappointment.

“Are you sure it was Mr Jingles?” Ray inquired, clearly not believing Brooke.

“Hasn’t he been locked up since like the 70’s?” Xavier pointed out.

“I know it was him. He murdered the hiker and cut off his ear” Brooke told them, as Y/N grimaced.

“C’mon then, let’s go” Y/N announced, picking up a flashlight.

“What?” Xavier frowned, as everyone turned to look at Y/N.

“There’s only one way to know if there’s really a murderer stalking the camp or if Brooke’s just lost her mind...no offence, Brooke” Y/N explained.

“A little offence taken” Brooke mummured, crossing her arms.

“You can’t be serious! It’s too dangerous” Xavier insisted.

“Chet will come with me, won’t you Chet?” Y/N exclaimed, turning to the man, who’s eyes widened.

“Uh...yeah?” Chet replied, gulping when he saw Xavier’s angry expression.

“I never said I wouldn’t come...I just said it was dangerous” Xavier pouted.

“C’mon blondie, you can hold my hand if you get really scared” Y/N teased, as she grabbed his arm and began to drag him after her.

Xavier rolled his eyes fondly, feeling much less afraid than he had moments before. With a sigh, the others began to follow them, not wanting to split up the group.

No one was surprised when they went to medical and found no dead hiker or killer lurking in the shadows. But Y/N couldn’t help but feel unerved, remembering the jingling keys she had heard earlier. While the other girls all slept soundly, Y/N found herself tossing and turning for hours. So she did what she always did when she couldn’t sleep. She found Xavier on the couch, and laid her head down on his lap, as he began stroking her hair softly. He placed his hand against her shoulder, bringing her closer to him as he remembered all the times they had had stayed in the position.

“So, what’s going on with you two?” Trevor inquired, as Y/N pretended to be asleep.

“What do you mean?” Xavier frowned.

“I mean your not just friends, right?” Trevor clarified, as Xavier’s fingers stilled against Y/N’s hair.

“We’re not just friends. She’s my best friend” Xavier retorted.

“That’s bullshit. You have a serious heart boner for her, man. It’s obvious” Trevor pointed out, as Xavier’s eyes widened.

“Hey, not so loud” Xavier hushed, as he looked down to check Y/N was still sleeping.

“Don’t bother, Trevor. They’ve been running around each other for years” Chet informed him.

“Look even if I did like Y/N, which I’m not saying I do!...It’s never going to happen” Xavier shook his head.

“Why not?” Trevor queried.

“She’s eighteen. She’s too young for me” Xavier insisted.

“That’s barely a five year age difference. I’ve fucked girls younger than her” Ray shrugged, as everyone turned to look at him.

“Ew, dude” Chet grimaced.

“She’s only just finished school. It’d be wrong for me to make a move” Xavier sighed.

“Well I guess it won’t matter for much longer anyway” Trevor stated, as he took a sip of his beer.

“Why’d you say that?” Xavier frowned.

“She’s leaving for college, right? She’ll move on pretty quickly” Trevor suggested, hiding a smirk, as he saw Xavier’s sad expression.

Y/N tried to keep as still as possible, and not give away she had been awake the whole time. Xavier liked her?

Y/N was barely paying attention as Brooke started to freak out about the murder of the gas attendant they had met earlier in the day. Her mind was running at a mile a minute, going over what Xavier had said. Did he really like her? Was her age the only thing that was keeping them apart?

“Oh my god. He’s coming after me” Brooke panicked.

“And this is a different killer from the killer on the phone? The one with the keys?” Xavier mocked her, as the other all laughed.

A spiteful part of Y/N couldn’t help but be happy that Xavier’s interest in Brooke seemed to be dwindling by the second.

“I’m not making this up!” Brooke insisted.

“Boys and girls together after dark” A voice boomed from behind Y/N, who jumped at the sound.

“God, don’t do that!” Y/N exclaimed, clutching at her heart.

“Don’t blaspheme!” Margaret scolded her, as Y/N rolled her eyes.

Y/N found herself zoning out as usual as Margaret began to preach. The woman seriously liked the sound of her own voice, Y/N thought to herself. Before she knew it, the boys were being ushered out of the room, meaning Y/N still hadn’t got a chance to talk to Xavier on his own.

“Are you going to make us pray the boners away?” Xavier mocked, as he walked towards the door.

“A clean body is a clean mind. How many times do I have to go over the rules? Boys shower at night, no exceptions. Now go wash the filfth off so you can wake up clean and pure for morning prayer” Margaret ordered, snatching the beer out of his hand.

“She is seriously nuts” Y/N mumbled, as Xavier and Margaret left the cabin.

“Margaret has got to get laid otherwise it’s going to be a long summer” Montana joked, as Y/N laughed.

“Speaking of getting laid, I’m sneaking out. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do” Y/N winked at Montana, who looked impressed.

“Go get that dick, Y/N!” Montana cheered her on, as Y/N grinned, and quielty opened the back door, running off into the night.

Y/N was confused when she saw Xavier walking away from the rest of the boys. It seemed like he was walking back to the cabin, when suddenly someone grabbed him and pulled him into the bushes. Y/N was about to jump forward to help Xavier, when he seemed to recognise who had attacked him. He followed a middle aged man towards an expensive looking car, not seeming particularly distressed. Y/N hid in the shadows, trying to make out what was happening in the car, when Xavier suddenly stormed out. The man grabbed him by the neck and pulled him to the ground, rolling on top of him.

“Hey!” Y/N screamed, as she ran forward and lunged at the man.

She dragged him off of Xavier, and punched the man squarely in jaw, sending him onto his back. She cried out as she held her fist to her chest, which was now painfully throbbing.

“What the hell is going on?” Y/N questioned, as she rushed over to Xavier and helped him sit up.

“It’s a long story” Xavier sighed.

“You little bitch-” The man growled, as he wiped blood off his lip.

“Wait, Blake! What if I said I had someone better to replace me? Bigger, way bigger” Xavier exclaimed, as he pushed himself in front of Y/N protectively.

“Where?” Blake inquired, as stood up.

“The showers...I’ll show you” Xavier answered, as Blake nodded.

“Lead the way” He announced, as Xavier pushed himself to his feet.

“You’re not going anywhere until you tell me what this is all about!” Y/N insisted, as she grabbed his arm.

“I’ll tell you on the way. C’mon, trust me” Xavier pleaded, as he held out his hand for her to take.

“You know I do” Y/N sighed, as she placed her hand in his own, and he pulled her upright.

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