#NEVER know what to tag non-fandom shit omg

[buggbuzz]

its been about 2 years so here's a new meet the artist!! i kept it pretty simple this time :)

[deedala]

✨WEEKLY TAG WEDNESDAY✨

thanks to @jrooc for the game this week and for tagging me + @creepkinginc @energievie @lingy910y @suzy-queued 💖

Hello beautiful kittens! 🐈‍⬛ Today’s tag game is about our wonderful fandom 😍

How did you get into the fandom? 

after falling deep into the shameless hellspiral i took to tumblr (as is my usual) to find gifs and memes and everything was so good and everyone was so wonderful i couldnt help but wedge my way into the community lmao

How long have you been here?

i started lurking september of 2022 and my first shameless post was in october of 2022 🥰

What’s the first fandom channel you found? (Youtube, Reddit, Tumblr, Insta, Twitter, FB, other?)

yeah tumblr i guess! my first instinct is always to search tumblr tags for a new thing i like 😌

what’s your favourite now? 

tumblr and discord equally, theyre both non-negotiable

Which mutual have you known the longest in the fandom?

@michellemisfit my beloved <3 ran into her in the @shamelesscreatorsnetwork discord (the first discord link i found) and we started talking and never shutted the fuck up ever again even until today lmao 🥰

Which tumblerino’s did you have your first fandom crush(es) on and want to get to know?

okay so since the first thing i seek out on a new interest is GIFS (and also shameless + text posts that shit absolutely sends me), the first people i followed and was so drawn to their immaculate vibes and gorgeous work were @gardenerian @heymacy and @sickness-health-all-that-shit biting you biting you biting you!!! 💖💖💖

First Gallavich fan fic you read (or that blew you away that you remember)

so michelle had me read redheaded step-children and it was so gorgeous and wonderful i was completely knocked on my ass by that one <3

and then i got the itch to read an AU and started with intro to quantum dating by @spoonfulstar and unless you're new here you are surely aware of how much i love that one 😂

First Fan art that blew your mind? 

i feel awful because i really cannot remember (crine) but pretty sure it was probably some gorgeous intricate @steorie painting

Fanfic trope that you were sure wasn’t for you but now you low key (or high key) love?

SPORTS AU - and now ive fully fucking lost my mind (@heymacy @too-schoolforcool know how deep it runs and i cannot even talk about it or i will throw up lmao)

What surprised you most about this fandom?

since my last significant foray into a fandom community was a pretty big fandom, there were looots of people who were just out for fucking blood. this community here on tumblr for shameless is a goddamn pillowfort, the vast majority of people are so sweet and supportive and happy to mind their own business it's such a fuckin breath of fresh air.

Moment in the show (or YT vids if you’re one of those) that you fell in hyperfixation with Gallavich?

i dont know if i can pinpoint just one moment? but probably one of the big moments early on since thats what would have kept me ravenous to keep consuming more lol

Ian or Mickey?

the fuck??? AAAAHHHHHHHHH uuhhhhh uuhmmmm omg. fuck. uh... okay...just... Mickey? no... Ian? uuhhhhmmm what was the question?

Which Gallagher or Milkovich are you? 

im gonna go with Debbie here <3

and now to tag some more folks in (in addition to everyone tagged above!!) if you want to play! if not, consider this me sending you cleansing brainwaves 🧠

@darlingian @heymrspatel @crossmydna @mybrainismelted @mmmichyyy @wehangout @metalheadmickey @gallawitchxx @thepupperino @blue-disco-lights @the-rat-wins @loftec @mickeysgaymom @rereadanon @callivich @lee-ow @palepinkgoat @gallapiech @transmickey @iansw0rld @captainjowl @howlinchickhowl @vintagelacerosette @sam-loves-seb @burninface @spookygingerr @mikhailoisbaby @themarchg1rl @whatwouldmickeydo @sleepyheadgallavich @sleepyfacetoughguy @samantitheos

💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

[moonlightdancer26]

Today (or since 3 days ago technically) I was having a jokey-argument with some blog I had never seen before, and after my second most recent reply they chose to say this:

For context, our exchange was under an ask I answered about which HP characters I think would win in a fist fight (and the anon listed a bunch of characters). For one of them it was Pomfrey vs. Snape, and I thought Snape would win bc he’s obviously much younger and faster. And this person decides to comment that Pomfrey would kick his ass, and I basically responded with dumb comments that weren’t meant to be taken seriously.

After my second comment, that screenshot is what they responded with. And honestly I think that says it all about his antis 💀 they literally have no decent arguments and use “omg ew you like (oh sorry, *worship, like he’s some kind of god) Snape?” as a last resort, and it’s much funnier when you remember that they’re the ones who come onto our posts and start with their shit. My post wasn’t even tagged as pro-snape, I just used general tags for everyone, and this person decided to single him out and insult me for liking him even though my post could’ve just as easily been written by a Snape anti/skeptic. They were unable to come up with a decent witty response and chose that while thinking it was a non-embarrassing reply.

And for your information, one of those dumb comments included me saying that Snape has a black belt in Shodokan Karate, and after that they straight up asked “is this canon or just snape fandom?” I genuinely can’t tell if that was a poor attempt at sarcasm or sincere curiosity, but either way it also shows how little they can recall when it comes to canon.

So, Snape antis, how about you guys just… don’t bring “loving SniVeLLuSssS” into an argument or discussion you know you’ve lost? You’re quite literally just making a fool out of yourself.

[shitouttabuck]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by @thewolvesof1998 thank u bud i’m procrastinating packing and this was fun

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

seven!

2. what’s your total ao3 word count?

129,484 which is a fake number to me

3. what fandoms do you write for?

nothing has made me as insane in my life as network television procedural drama 911 on abc, so

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

you can start a family who will always show you love

let the world have its way with you

my hearts over-pumping and your mouth is an ambulance

like a dog with a bird at your door

i like the summer rain (i like the sounds you make)

5. do you respond to comments? why or why not?

i try very hard to because they make me so happy and it’s unbelievably kind of people to take the time to leave them!!! However i sometimes leave it too long and then worry it’s weird to reply after like. a month. which as a fic reader i wouldn’t give a shit about so idk what my problem is!!!! i will reply i will just maybe take a hot sec to do it

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i don’t have any i’m a happily ever after or bust kinda guy in my own head if nowhere else…… angstiest is probably the sound of love astounds me if only because it ends post-feelings realisation but still pre-relationship

7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

they’re all so happy omg. i will say with great personal bias it’s my heart’s over-pumping but also i have. a sequel in the works….

8. do you get hate on fics?

no people have been very very very lovely but also sjjsjsjs i’ve not been here super long. the funniest comment i’ve gotten was on my first fic where someone was like i liked this but it is jarringly inaccurate as mcdonald’s in california doesn’t have a veggie burger option 😭 i cried laughing im so sorry to u americans. pls petition your local mcdonald’s to stock the mcplant it slaps

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

have written two e-rated fics….. it’s very fun but i don’t think i’m very good so i’d like to practice actually (maybe some sexy prompts after i finish the bed-sharing ones?) just the regular kind for now like i love buck and eddie desperately and am myself into a million things but i don’t know how kinky they would actually get in my own head. so just a little gross with it for now i guess

10. do you write crossovers? what’s the craziest one you’ve written?

nope!

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

nope

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

no that would be SICK. @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove is podficcing bucket list fic which is so very cool of her!

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

no omg i don’t know how y’all do it i’m bad at group projects but also this sounds soooooo fun. if also deeply stressful

14. what’s your all time favorite ship?

if that’s synonymous with most likely to get you institutionalised, uh. gestures around us. otherwise mulder/scully and i am just now right as i’m typing this realising i’ve never ever in my life actually read x files fic what the fuck. also steve/bucky but i haven’t read fic since 2017 probably

15. what’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

listen i have not written a word for x files au past that one snip i shared forever ago. i want to soooo bad i’ve talked about it to some of you very rabidly but. it does not want to be written and if it did it would have to be so fucking long which is very daunting to me. not saying i’ve put her in the ground yet but. we might need some necromancing

16. what are your writing strengths?

i think i’m pretty good at writing in character? mostly? sometimes i struggle with buck just because i think we’re very similar and i project a little and then have to go back and fix it lmao but for the most part i think i’m good at that! and i have a lot of fun writing dialogue

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

plot!!!!!! and pacing!!!!!!!!!!! also my inability to write non-linearly omg if i get stuck i just get Stuck i can’t jump ahead

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

oooh i love it and would love to include more than the teeniest bits i have but i’m so conscious about it sounding natural and not stiff to people whose language it actually is (shout out and a million kisses to @eddiebabygirldiaz for fixing the spanish in i love you like a dog!!!!!)

19. first fandom you wrote for?

911 babey!

20. favorite fic you’ve written?

my heart’s over-pumping and your mouth is an ambulance !!! not just because it was the first fic i posted after joining tumblr fandom but. idk it is so so so special to me like it makes me so happy and when i think about it i’m like. hey u wrote that. good for u my dude. and also maybe i just associate it with meeting a bunch of you whjsjssjsj

tagging @callaplums @eddiebabygirldiaz @housewifebuck @rewritetheending @try-set-me-on-fire @onward--upward @anxieteandbiscuits @devirnis @athenagranted if anyone wants to do this i’m nosy soz if you already have !!!!

[keyboardinpain]

news flash: "racism is bad!!!" Doesn't work against a racist. They don't give a single fuck 💀

if you're trying to change a fandom by attaching yourself to every drama and complaining about the racism and putting everyone who doesn't draw a certain character in the same category, I'm sorry to tell you, you ain't doing shit for representation!!! You want to change the fandom? You want to see more poc countries being depicted? Do it yourself!! Post!! Talk about whatever!!

"oh but people don't pay attention to poc countries :(( my account won't grow if I do that.. is because everyone is so racist"

1- that's the same reasoning big companies have for never depicting minorities, so let's immediately start this by saying, bullshit. People who care WILL find your account and isn't that what matters? The people who care? Not 20000 people that look at your posts in annoyance because they don't actually care and were guilt tripped into following you

2- who....who are you posting for?? Yourself to have fun and interact with people who have similar interests or to get famous?? Who cares if somebody posting Twink Italy gets more followers, post about Nigeria with passion and peace and have fun!!!

3- not everyone who doesn't pay attention to your account or poc countries is fucking racist omg. Yes, ofc, racism in geopolitics and history has caused lots of people to not have access to a full picture of the world and this will show in the interests but also .. maybe they haven't found your account? Most poc countries have to be ocs and finding hetalia ocs is hard. Even harder finding them interesting when they're barely posted about or if they are drowned with drama. It's not racism, it's not knowing it could even exist! And still, if they don't care that's ok. It's still not racist. And same thing if they are canon. Not everyone has to care

Shit I have a bunch of mutuals who don't reblog my Venezuela art, does that make them racist?? No! They don't care and that's fine!!! It's ok!!! I don't care about the Nordics they don't care about Venezuela, it's chill! Not everyone has to have your same interests in the same way

And also, constantly posting about drama instead of actually working on your goddam OC's makes people immediately be turned off by your account.

People don't need extra negativity "it's not fair white people get to ignore this while we suffer constantly" MF you were the one that posted that!!!! You can block people!!! Fucking Tumblr makes bubbles specifically to create echo chambers of yes man, you don't have to deal with the negativity either!!! And also the whole point of wanting equality is so nobody has to suffer, not so everyone suffer the same!!! There are multiple ways to keep yourself safe that I myself use because my own country gets treated like shit 💀 this is a fandom, you don't have to interact with everyone you don't like or correct them nobody out there will stop dying if you do.

You are fighting a random person behind the screen not actually dismantling centuries of racism. This just makes it stressful for poc people or non poc people who want to draw poc characters, you know why? Because it feels like we constantly need to interact with drama and we can't look at tags that aren't filled with it. I hope nobody in this fandom has anxiety or OCD cause the way so many posts are formatted is nauseating!

Its the same bullshit as "if you listen to this song you're a bigot" 🍅

You are drowning in a drop of water. Racists exist everywhere but if you constantly go looking for them and interact with them, guess what? More racists will find you. The algorithms will literally bring them to you 💀💀

I am not saying racists don't deserve criticism, obviously they do. It's important to hold people accountable (especially in this fucking fandom) but once you see they won't start changing... block them. Don't base your content around calling racists out cause every racist who has been called out is still posting and being racist. Your time would be much better spent doing the content you like and creating a safe place for others who wish to do the same, even if it's only 5 people.

I know I sound very angry in this post, frankly I am. It's not targeted at anyone specifically tho. There is a lot of imbalance in this fandom but making huge rants (like this one lol) won't make up for the lack of a certain country, only making content with them will, and guilt tripping other people into making it will give you shitty results.

This rant was all over the place and if you read it that's great, it's probably nonsense. I am not expecting anyone to change their mind, I do not care, I just needed to get this off my chest. Once again, this is not targetted at anyone and if you feel targetted, talk about it with yourself cause I'm not going against you. Have a great day/night and remember to have fun

[italianpersonwithashippersheart]

Shipper Tag Game!

I was tagged by @theflagscene thanks for the tag <3

1 - What ship were you completely obsessed with when you were a teenager, but now you don’t care about anymore?

Ron and Hermione. But I was basically offline for most of my teen years so it was a private obssession.

2 - Which ship would you consider your first one?

These two

From the anime Kodomo No Omocha, the anime was called Rossana In Italian, still the best theme song in the world, that song is basically instand magic nostalgia button for me, I was a child and basically the age of the characters when I watched it, maybe a year or two older, they bewitched me body and soul.

3 - Your first fanfic belonged to which couple?

Written, I have never written anything that could be consider fanfic. Maybe once I wrote a single scene fic for an Italian Show but that's it.

Read on AO3: Stranger Things post s1 fics and Still Star Crossed fics were the first fandoms. I don't have the old fanfiction.net account and my shitty memory doesn't let me remeber shit from that time so, I will go with that.

4 - Do you remember the first couple you saw fanart of?

Not really, my memory is bad. Maybe Stydia, teen wolf was my first tumblr fandom along side GMW. Or Shameless.

5 - Did you ever get into ship discourse?

I have been aware of ship discourse. And I once pettily unfollowed someone because they shipped my NOTP at the time. But not really.

6 - Did you used to have a NOTP or have any currently?

I did used to consider ship NOTPs, but I don't currently use that term anymore, I am way into my ship and let ship era. I don't feel like any of the ship I dislike now are strong enough to be a notp. Even if there are a few that almost qualified.

7 - Who were the couple in the last fanfic you read?

Got curious because someone mention some Nick/Sand and some Nick/Sand/Ray stuff on my dash and looked up some Only Friend fics for the first time since the show ended.

8 - Currently do you have any OTPs?

Too many. I have been mostly watching BLs and QLs recently. Honestly shipping as become a little more low-key recently. I can love a ship and even read fanfic for them (although small confession I am becoming far more picky and It's super hard now to read a fic I enjoy especially in the BL sphere). And I am watching so many shows at the same time I don't think any of them could be called an OTP, in that omg I am so obsessed with them way. I feel like my attention is too split for that.

Not that I am not enjoying having so many ships and couples to choose from, I love it here in BL land.

If I had to pick a single ship that is consuming me body and soul like stuff used to I have to go with PheeNon from Dead Friend Forever, because this show put itself in my head and is going to stay there until it's over.

9 - Is there any couple that to this day you are extremely mad about them not getting together?

Does it have to be an old ship?? Because I only rember some recent stuff.

I WILL STAY MAD ABOUT TODDBLACK FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!

10 - Is there any ship that you used to dislike but now you think are kind of interesting?

Not sure, I have come around a couple of BL ships I didn't initially like at first viewing. Nothing special though.

11 - Do you have a ship that in the past was considered ‘normal’ but now you would be cancelled over?

I am not sure, I used to be the kind of person that followed canon and didn't get the appeal of crackships at the time. Or shipping non canon ships.

I guess maybe some het ships that I know now either have a very obviously gay coding (both or just one) or it's more common to put in a gay ship. But I am not sure anything too controversial.

I kind of read some early Mame fanfics and enjoy some of the mame ships does count?

12 - What’s your favourite crack ship?

Taking crack fic too mean there is basically no evidence of this in canon and there is little to no fics about them.

Ming/Yo from 2Moons (the og) I will die on this hill, the actor that played these two had amazing chemestry.

Anwar and Maxxie from Skins Gen 1. There are 3 fics of them on ao3. 3!!!! I feel like the only person that see this.

13 - Who is the couple you’ve read the most fanfics of?

I think maybe it's either Hannigram or Buck and Eddie from 911 a show I am feeling very over right now. So that will definately change.

14 - What do most of your ships usually have in common?

Not much. I enjoy different types of dynamics.

15 - What do you absolutely hate in a ship?

I have come to a point where if I can see the chemestry and I like the characters and I can get into the characters head and I think the relationship is interesting I can forgive bad or clunky writing. Or tropes like miscommunication and noble idiocity.

There is one trope that almost always kills a ship for me. Years long seperation in the final act. This is pretty much a bl only trope. But I have seen it in Het shows before I think.

I can understand a seperation for a couple of weeks or even months due to externel pressures and maybe some noble idiocity, or even something like I need to sort myself out a little first like Until We Meet Again. I don't love it. But it's fine. But YEARS!! That shit pisses me off. That is why even if I can understand the writing decision behind I hold a grudge over Ghost Host, Ghost House. I understand it was a good drama and the writing was good and the ship is cute. BUT I HATE THAT TROPE.

Not sure how did already so I will only tag @respectthepetty and @callipigio @benkaaoi

[prettyboy-like-you]

Felt like stopping by and saying thank you for your amazing art! Writing too❤️❤️❤️

what?! ana. DUUUUUUUUUUDE! my love <333 so utterly kind of you to sneak into my asks with this kindness! I CRY x')

and omg SAME. love love love all your wonderful writing and creations! so much!!

and i don't know if i've said this before—like. i feel like i must have, but i am an actual idiot—BUT PLS, PLS (if you're so inclined) ALWAYS TAG ME IN YOUR WORKS! i have alerts on for you and all the party members but i have fandom 7 blogs and create for each of them so always have soOoo much going on to interact with here on dumblr dot com... PLUS i'm adhd so have only 0.1% executive function AND i'm autistic and get easily overwhelmed and get the digital version of going non-verbal and and and YEAH. basically i can never keep up with all my rad mutual's stuff and i'd really like to! and yes, i've tried tracking tags but failed miserably lol; i'm no good with abstract shit, so if i have to remember to search for something it just. doesn't happen!

anyways, to reiterate and summarise:

ANA AND ANYBODY AND EVERBODY ELSE WHO MAKES THEIR OWN CONTENT AND SEES THIS, PLS FEEL FREE TO ALWAYS TAG ME IN YOUR WORKS! BC I LOVE THEM AND YOU AND HATE MISSING OUT ON SEEING THEM AND REBOOPING THEM!

i'm so sorry ana, didn't mean to take away from your super kind ask, hope this was okay to tag onto my appreciation? just seemed like a good opportunity to tell you this (and others)!

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU <333

[problematicpervertpod]

recs on recs on recs

Yaoi/Manga I’m reading/have read. Please support the artists on official websites. If you have recs or want to chat about any of these get in my messages right the fuck now my dudes. Also spoilers, also this probably doesn’t make sense to anyone but me, also I think I’m funny sorry in advance.

Dangerous Convenience Store

Tags: Ongoing, self aware lead for the most part, gangs, smut, love triangle, possessive, not rapey, seme is like the fucking hulk compared to uke, college, age gap, good art, muscular bodies, seme is adorable/romantic in sp chapters, sexual awakening, meeting the gang (in two ways!), FAINTS OF CUTENESS/HOTNESS, the memes after every chapter got me gagged, HAHE hahahahahahahahahaha, OMG DO I GET SOME CNC?! (update: short lived), we stan a vocal man (Ahjussi), thigh fucking, my mans be like my thighs hurt fuck my ass instead DECEASED, ass smacking, these memes are so good god damnit, rimming

8/10, I live for Ahjussi (Am I spelling this wrong..)

The New Employee 

-love love love

Tags: ongoing, we stan supportive boyfriends, healthy relationship, boss/employee, smut, office setting, good art, 10/10 will re-read, muscular bodies

Love Shuttle

Tags: completed, ABO, enemies to lovers, possessive, coworkers, fake relationship, strong omega, the art sucks but I like the story, art gets better after the 1st season, alphas eyes change colors when happy/anxious, muscular bodies, 7/10, update 10/10 art is meh but fml this storyline is basic af in the best way and it’s the fluff/smut I need, when you’re caught by the folks *cringe*

Hold Me Tight

Tags: ongoing, boss/employee, bodyguard, gio can’t feel heat until felix comes along, uke is strong af, horny bastards, smut, possessive, tragic childhood, moving in together right away, rich seme, felix in a bunny costume though *heart eyes*, dialogue is great, rape in a technical sense but the vibe is written like both characters are all good after? Ex. hospital scene…dub con, ART IS GREAT, hand holding during sex, 10/10 will re-read, muscular bodies

Yours to Claim 

Tags: ongoing, love triangle, Dom/sub dynamics, smut, main is big switch energy, reincarnation, jealousy, manipulative, possessive, self aware lead for the most part, toxic af, GREAT ART, college, rich semes, 10/10 will re-read and not even finished, SONOFABITCH that cliff hanger!! Season 3 come thruuuu (I have to wait until November? *cries* BUT MAH LOVE TRIANGLE!!, I want a THROUPLE GOD DAMN IT

The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation

Tags: obsessed with this story, will the incense burner scenes make it?? No tags because I'll never forget this one haha wangxian 5ever, send me all fanfics/fan art you have about this story, love Dark Wangji, Jadecest, ABO/omegaverse, Bottom Wangji/Top Wei Ying, and honestly anything regarding this fandom

Bj Alex

Tags: completed, great art, 11/10 will re-read, cam boy, fanboy, seme is an asshole, uke is so sexy, jealously, rich seme, enemies to lovers kind of?, CHANWOO IS MY BOY FOR LIFE, Chanwoo MD supremacy, BDSM (like really really), fuck I love Chanwoo, college students, rich seme, emotional rollercoaster, uke soft body, mean seme, college life, that one nosy bitch ass guy trying to expose my boys needs to fuck right off, seme split/fake personality, dub con 

Anti PT

Tags: ongoing, 11/10 re-readable, porn with feelings, love triangle, jealousy, attempted non-con, personal training wink wink, main love interest is actually the best, second male lead is a god damn creep, first time, smut, great art, sex addict/constantly horny uke, I WANT A HWI, 

Related: https://www.anime-planet.com/manga/anti-pt/recommendations 

Payback

Tags: ongoing, both are psychopaths tbh, revenge, gangs, uke sells himself to seme, violent seme, entertainment industry, brunette supremacy, what this motherfucker gonna do? hehe , great art, muscular bodies, dead dove do not eat, my mans must be GOOD looking/animal magnetism cause everyone losing their fucking minds, okay this is a comedy I’m dying, he tried to scare him with wanting to be a top but my psycho said REVERSEUNO BITCH I’M A VERSE (wait jk apparently *sigh*), anonymous masked sex (sad n’ kinky)

My Suha

Tags: ongoing, wow this gets dark, possessive af like holy shit, terrible people all around uke, rape, boss/employee, office politics/family politics, smut, characters that are punchable, dead dove do not eat, *velociraptor noises*, avoided this for a while but I’m back because nothing can be more emotionally devastating than Banana Fish, TIE HIM UP, FUCK HIS FACE ALKSJD:ASKD, FUCK SUHA UR SO HOT that dirty talk though YAS, glad I picked this back up lmao, GOD DAMN IT just when the package arrived then this red head fucker *screams*

Shame Application aka Dirty Vibration

Tags: completed, friends to lovers, model seme, cute af uke, love triangle, entertainment industry, smut, kink, all kinds of sex everywhere, realized feelings, mutual pining, jealousy, rich seme, blonde seme, big brother 1984 always watching, 10/10 would re-read, porn with plot, they were roommates!, ~straight~ seme, first times, great art, remembering some cringe but considering the story it’s par for the course

Will You Subscribe

Tags: ongoing, season 1 completed, enemies to lovers, cam boy, office politics, boss/employee, hiding a secret, public sex, stalkers/creepy men, emotionally stunted characters, mutual pining, idiots in lust, lingerie company, slut shaming, jealousy/possessiveness, season 2 bebeh, HOLDING HANDS *velociraptor noises*, LMAO okay my mans is not THAT old how tf does he not know netflix and chill, BUNNY COSTUME (quickly becoming my new fav trope in manga, A+ gang), oh we stan a good boy, wtf is wrong with wanting to do cam work, ‘I wish my marks could become permanent’ *omegaverse wink*, *works for lingerie company* *doesn’t understand where bf gets sexy costumes* like wut kind of fuckery…, cross dressing ftw, roleplay, classic BL miscommunication trope

Hyperventilation

Tags: completed, high school crush, unrequited love, mutual pining, smut, quickie (short story), class reunion, apparently furry with the extra chapter turning my man into a bunny but c'est la vie! https://myreadingmanga.info/korean-bl-animation-hyperventilation-engsub/ this is the animation of the same story, different endings but same in tone (this site is spammy AF but the English subs are so hard to find for this) 8/10 

Unmei no tsugai ga omae da nante

Tags: only one bed, ABO, office setting. Coworkers, enemies to lovers, competitive, equality in the omegaverse, dubcon, real dicks and not lightsabers, fated pair, art is cute af 8/10

K’s Secret

Tags: buckle up buttercup, dead dove do not eat, angst, pining, somnophilia, dub con, non con, boss/employee, manipulative, stalking, forced relationship, tragic childhood background, weird art but gets better,  uke: don’t threaten me with a good time but seriously stop threatening me, possessive & obsessive, seme is like the fucking hulk compared to uke, wow were going full psycho stalker hm?, dating a narcissist is all fun and (mind)games, con non con… ? honestly who tf knows, domestic!, OW MY HEART, the t/n WAP note sent me, ch 51 translated by gen z, do special ep= furry? Wait there’s a maid costume, bunny costume, directors friends keeping it real, rough translations 8/10

Enthusiasm

Tags: ongoing, dead dove do not eat, uke buys seme, masc boys, muscular bodies, fight club, master/slave, rich uke, revenge, real dicks not lightsabers, rough sex, cuckholding, daddy issues, suicide, wow the end of ch 5 punched a hole in my heart, penile implant life,  rough translations makes the storyline wonky, nvm back to lightsabers *star wars noises*, HAD ME FEELING SOME TYPE OF WAY I CAN NOT, shibari, possessive, wait this is cute *velociraptor noises*, angst, no kithes for you “bestie”, OBSESSED, honestly choke him pupper, STAY THE NIGHT ALKSDJA:SLDKJAS:LKDJA:SLDKj, problematic but I’m riding for these two, 

Ichimai Goshi Fetish

Tags: completed, short, fetishes DO start in childhood don’t they *ruminates*, author: describes ML as a beautiful 2D character meanwhile: ML IS 2D character, fellas is it gay to kiss the homies?, “real dudes don’t interest me” is a MOOD, comedy, jealousy, college setting, dialogue is A+, not lightsabers but not dicks either, first time, when you’re fucked so good you think you’ve died, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R4uEq5Nx6ko, hero/villain roleplay. Fluff n smut 10/10

My Purrfect Boss

Tags: completed, tooth rotting fluff because blondie is so FUCKING cute little sensitive soul, golden retriever boyfriend, pure comedy, DECEASED, MY MAN JUST DID THE SLOW BLINK, office setting, boss/employee, ~wasted~ (red dead redemption meme),  FFS SO CUTE, he put a ring on it right away beyonce would be proud af, he protecc he attack but most importantly he hit it from the back, jealousy, honeymoon phase of dating, the ex is a snake (update: oh wow literally), I’m picking up abuse/PTSD vibes based on how Kang reacts to his ex :(, classic BL miscommunication plot, immediately no meme audio (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6XWSGfYnps) ,  I WILL STRAIGHT UP MURDER CHA WTF!!!!!!, gang rape, spiked with drugs that force heat, me rn:*screaming/rage*, psychotic ex/abuser, HE PROTECCC, actual relief after that scene jesus fuck, okay YES kings I see you, okay this is giving me cuteness aggression, hi yes I’d like to adopt a cat and a dog please 9/10

Following Namsoo to the Bathhouse

Tags: completed, same author as, “My Purrfect Boss”, A+ comedy once again, JUNIOR, gay awakening, “fap myself to death” DEAD, facial expressions are ridic, my minds telling me no but my body, my bodyyyy’s telling me yaaaaa, ya boy is literally losing his mind over this, actual lightsabers lmao, FLUFF, permasmile, 6969, THINKS THEY’RE GOING TO EAT RAMEN, dense gay, own your skin wtf okay hannibal calm down, everyone is officially cray,  ah I also am barfy when drunk, denial really is something hm, classic BL miscommunication plot, when people pleasing too far, happy ending 🥺🥰, side story: our crazy gets his very own crazy (ashton Kutcher from spread vibes), public sex, sex sparkle 9/10

Alien in my Closet

Tags: ongoing (maybe completed but def ongoing on the site I use), not rapey at all?? You’d think it’s impossible in this medium ffs, anti pt vibes, cute art, fluff ‘n smut, red head!!, they were roomates!, sex toys, bsdm, D/s (brat)dynamic or maybe owner/pet, bondage, *tiffany hadish voice* this is noiceeee, con humiliation/degradtion, SANTA CLAUS, edging, marking, one lotus please (he’s clearly read the 4 agreements and karma sutra), con non con, exhibitionism, the wrist thing stays on people, Katoptronophilia,  roleplay, is it stalking when you bring your friends?, lotus: welcome home cheater, the chin on the head thing gives me cuteness aggression, the twins are my favs, when ur crush vanilla af 😭, haesung: experiment on me daddy, no dick until halfway through/fingering supremacy, bedroom sessions has me gagged, voyeurism, wait they haven’t kissed this whole time I forgot (audio: https://www.tiktok.com/@ryley/video/6976701880277748997?lang=en), sunbae is sus, YES FINALLY A FUCKING SWITCH COUPLE AKJSDHALKSJDHASKLJDHALS KJDALKSJD (update: sort of), there’s a missed opportunity for an anal probe joke, damn it okay maybe sunbae is chill, 3 musketeers, my heart*implodes*, *velociraptor noises*, 12/10 would re-read such fluff my heart 

On Doorstep

Tags: completed, age gap, reese has ptsd, jimmy going from 0 to 100, jimmy really got down on his knees at work, ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) deepest part you say, real dicks, ride him like a rodeo, quickie/short story, porn with plot

Gorani Jeon

Tags: ongoing, omegaverse, no alpha though, animal hybrid, art is beautiful like it's drawn on paper not a screen, 40 inch weave yours came in a pack, historical (non-modern), lord send me a sexy man pls, the memes after each chapter are golden, taking the phrase licking wounds literally, is that an eggplant or are you just happy to see me hehe, ahhh so inhibitors do exist here, vertical 69, here lays Bau fucked to death by Ran, WHY HE TOUCHING MY MAN, these chickens are dope, stomp on his dick, that’s what I call a happy meal, fucked right out the front door I’M DEAD, mpreg, i need a tiger+mountain god spin off (whoops dad/son my bad), slice of life, cute fluff 8/10

Room to room

Tags: completed, college setting, A+ dialogue, absurd size difference, unrequited love,  sexsomina, dubcon, angst, death by a thousand cuts emotionally, insecurity, body envy, pining, friends to lovers, they were roommates!, homophobia, sexual assault, PTSD, gays in denial, the tattoo 🥺 ow my heart, truly this is 90% smut, “going from unrequited love to fwbs is shittier than I expected”, dowan *bad blood by t swift* when he sees garam, ch 22garam reminds me of my ex and that’s not a compliment, I’m not gay but my boyfriend is vibes, triflers need not apply, spanking, 😭😭😭😭😭 my heart hurts, is anyone getting a bit of a puppy play vibe? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vni9ZWmDXis, handcuffs, lots of head we stan, dowan’s gotta a touch of a foot thing or maybe body worship thing, asdlfgkjs ;dlkfgjsd;flkgj;sdflkgj;sdlfgjs;d/gkdf SO CUTEEEEEEEEEEE, roleplay. They broke the bed no use of crying over spilled milk ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), side stories delivering man in uniform and sex toys AND puppy, asdlkjaslfkasdjfl;askdfjasdf the shirt thing is so hot, watersports, I take it back this is 98% smut 9/10

Mistake Lover

Tags: completed, when ur bff is back on their BS, love triangle, coworkers, i swear all these ukes look the same to me at this point (which is very cute), GE!!!! (wangxian flashbacks), wait no smut?.... Paused

Yagi to ookami no hatsujou jijou

Tags: completed, quickie/short story, literally on my reading list because a comment said “nice cock 10/10”hahahaha, animal hybrids, scifi/aliens, me during chapter one: am I a furry? No. Am I? Relevant audio https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noJNIqvDfoo, hotties when human GOD DAMN, bi king, okay I stan this girl changing gears take your opportunities honey!, does blondie have a tinder or how is this happening? (update: called it), feminization, dubcon/noncon, marking, heats, idk about 10/10 cock but not lightsabers, translation is ruff (get it?), a yankee hahaha, literal wound licking, googles chimera, *claps* yes king selfish call his ass out, tail holding caaaayoooot, not that isn’t usually copious amounts of cum but really this is a lot 8/10

Make Me Bark

Tags: completed, $250 a month rent?? *cries in Californian*, god damn it these grey haired 2D men are really hot fml, “next months rent is a looming concern but I hope it’ll get better” followed by apartment on fire is how I feel about reality, rare characters that smile way more than they frown, sex toys, kink, puppy play, owner/pet dynamic, sugar daddy/baby, college setting, harness, muzzle, leash, tail plug, shirt thing!!, soaked briefs, playing barbie IRL, omg meet cute at the adult store, intercrural sex, possessive/jealousy, ah fuck yes I saw this panel on IG but it didn’t have the source but now hehe, whipping, choking, spanking, *bookmarks*, simp city, childhood friends, side couple cute af, yeonsoo: sorry I’m an anti romantic, size queen, mens lingerie, domestic, mutual pining,  these bestie pairings are *chefs kiss*, skinny but muscular bodies/no ridiculous size differences, “does he have a big dick?” “probably” “well tell him to come” GAGGED AJKSDHALSKDJHA this dialogue pure comedy, exhibitionism, human auction, maid costume, men in heels, topping in a dress, girl at the bus stop HAHAHA, ffs this is so cute, side stories: it’s a small world afterall, dynamic role reversal, pink haired boy is guru, SCREAMING AKDJA:SLDKJA:LKDJA:LSDKJLAKDJA:LDJAL:SKDJASLKDJA:SLKDJLAKSDJLASDJ:LASJD:ALSKDJASL:DJ:ASLJDPUTARINGONIT!!!! 11/10 

Gurume no fukurami

Tags: completed, quickie/short story, food fetish, feeding fetish, age gap, throuple-eqsue? There’s 3 people involved, paused ch 1 pg 30

Under the Green Light

Tags: ongoing, thank you IG for rec’ing this, brunette supremacy, neurodivergent?, lmao @hag, this statue is everything I wonder if it’s based on a real piece?, we went from talking art to being pinned to the ground REAL quick, translations rough but not as rough as my mans here, draw me like one of your french girls vibe, sass master, these dicks are ridiculously huge which is saying something for this genre, i love a verse/switch, “first time he’s asked someone to stop so his self-esteem is hurt” HAHAHAHA, stealing bae’s shirt, facials galore, car sex/public sex, jin not into praise kink clearly, sort of slut shaming jealousy, marking

Walk on Water

Tags: completed, for being about porn it’s not that smutty (i take it back), “don’t even think about running away” got me like https://giphy.com/gifs/VABbCpX94WCfS, actual dicks (lightsabers later must be the cleaners not the OG), muscular bodies, blonde seme, brunette uke, k mcqueen is everything, honestly haven’t loved a couple this much since chanwoo x MD and I LOVE THEM, jealousy, orgasm denial, the angles/frames of the art in this are insane (11/10), emotional intimacy CUTENESS HASIHDLASKDHJLAKSJDH, i wanna lick lick lick you from your head to your toes, dirty talk A+, bestie you turned out to be Judas you judgy fuck how dare you touch my man, Ryan is 50 shades of fucked up bb needs therapy, Chang and yeowoons sexual tension is *chefs kiss*, I ship it/all my ships sailing, woof non con but expected tbh, YEAH BABY YEAH *Austin powers voice*, fml I don’t want this story to end, meeting the Hets ™ would make me nervous too, spiderman kith, mirror sex sjkadfhasldjkfh, 34+35, JOI but with a partner? Not D/s, promises are made to broken hehe, that feeling when you understand the title, omg the fan art is so cool!! 15/10 would re-read seriously I can’t explain how well the artist used angles/how she portrayed the scenes was fucking MASTERFUL

Woof Wolf

Tags: that's my best friend (saweetie), red heads, werewolf au, college setting, students, shoot a shot in your mouth while I'm riding, facials, marking

Sexual Awakening of an Ex Delinquent 

Tags: completed, quickie/short story, sexual coercion/non con/dub con, tiddies, bondage, nipple play, edging/orgasm denial, candy in ass wow, food kink, kink in general, rich seme working class uke, lightsabers,  big dick Jesus fuck, exhibitionism, public sex, men's lingerie, Blondie is a sweet baby angel, self hatred/homophobia, sexual narrating that has me like oof 😣 that's not how this works but okay, the sweet spots thing is a great line, man is a slave to the sweets, lmao at the meme at the end of ch 9 fucking facts, kidnapping plot, rapey guys all around this story, tattoo/back story reveal has me like *nods head yes*, my throats broken has me gagged, crazy amount of sfx noises that distract from the art (I really appreciate cleaners I realize), first times, rushed ending feels,  would rate 6/10 not terrible but probably won't read again.  

With Your Tail Yes

Tags: ongoing, IG rec, quickie/short story, on man brunette looks EXACTLY like a different character by another artist like for real duplicate, home boy pulled Elle Wood’s Bend n Snap and we are HERE FOR IT, lingerie/cross dressing, okay compilation of short stories, great artwork but wtf these are far too short (maybe uploaded wrong..?), *immediately makes deal with the devil because yum*, ah okay previews THEN stories, human animal hybrid situation, lightsabers, fucking imagine your crush delivery the sex toy you ordered online HAHA *dies*, buys toys because men ain’t shit is a VIBE, you know he’s always wearing matching sets because he’s 100% that bitch, dub con/non con, knotting (unexpected), exhibitionism, public sex, good ol’ fashion blackmail to get your lover to stay with you trope, sexual assault/attempted rape, victim blaming, shibari, leashes, D/brat dynamic sort of, copious amounts of cum, lube? What lube?, marathon sex, first time, 75 hours?? Immediately no meme, 7/10 mostly for art/concepts but not execution

Heat and Run

Tags: ongoing, IG rec, omegaverse, friends to enemies to lovers, multiple couples as main to sides then sides to mains, my heart dropped because I thought the first sex scene was incest but then realized I’m mixing up all the characters derp, dense gays, this is america (the shooting comment WOOF reality feels bad man), blondes have more fun, real dicks, dubcon/CNC dealers choice, mutual pining, idiots in love, big alpha energy BDE, there are moments I feel Hayoung on a spiritual level and not sure that’s a compliment hahaha, orgasm denial/edging, istg if he bonded without Hayoung permission *jenna marbles BOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII YOU BETTAH NOT*, also I was hoping the idol was him but realizing it’s probs his sis, *deep sigh*, BDIRL, wow racism, oh no oh no no no no no meme audio, listen everyone needs to get into therapy to break that generational trauma is all I’m saying (not excusing abuse at all, trauma isn’t a free pass), NO ONE WANTS TO PLAY A GAME WITHOUT KNOWING THE RULES :ALKSDHJALKSDJA:SLKDJTRUE, matthew singing bo burnham: I’m problematic *background singers ‘he’s a problem!’*, i ship it yolo, JAEHO STAN (no means no!), mpreg, god damn it I am so worried about him getting roofie and the party scene hasn’t even started ABO WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TOO ME, OH THANK JAEHO, dayummmm that clapback was real fuck him UP, me clapping: MARK HIM MARK HIM, GOD DAMN IT WITH THESE ONGOING FUCKING CLIFF HANGERS FML, marked via knotting? Okay that’s new, but also like normal marking I think, fucking til bottom pees trope

Heaven Officials Blessing

Animated series season 1 complete. Live action currently filming (same director as Untamed too UGH SO HAPPY)

Tags: ongoing, same author as my fav ever MDZS, just finished season 1 animated on netflix and can no longer avoid this because I LOVE THEM, all the memes on IG make sense now, Prince voice: Dearly Beloved (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXJhDltzYVQ) we are gathered here today to dive deeper into a fandom I will never escape, ART IS AMAZING (https://tenor.com/view/incredible-talented-lady-brilliant-gaga-gif-14857187), group chats are always chaotic tbh, wait a minute meme audio: bride = bottom? How tf did I not get that the first time round *sigh* always hoping for a verse couple, the asst. Boys I ship hard, the sass, fuck this is going to just be pure angst isn’t it *straps in, has fluffy manga queued*, even if no smut 11/10 gege porn, not subtle, god FUCK this ART IS SO FUCKING GOOD THE TALENT skjas;ldkfja;, 🥺, traumatic cliff moment *mdzs flashbacks*, HC smirk is my new favorite thing, no fucking but lots of touching, size difference, horror, gore, wuxia, great side characters, my ear feels tingly too lmao, SOMEONE BETTER GET THESE MF SNAKES ON THIS MF PLANE (cliff), umbrella moments got me uwu, gimme at least didi pleaseandthankyou, FUCK I LOVE THIS ARTIST she keeping us WELL fed with these extras DAYUM, wind/earth master ship please sail, CALL ME DADDY IM DEAD, HC has LWJ energy like you are not qualified to talk to me LOL, WAIT this totally counts as there was only one bed trope, also I’m already excited about omegaverse ff (send me recs please please please)

4 week lovers

Tags: ongoing because apparently I want to torture myself, mutual pining/”unrequited love”, college life, friends to lovers, blackmail ur crush into sex trope, public sex, I was going to tag possessive body language but possessive in a general sense apparently (starting strong yessss), sure jan @unrequited love dialogue, THEY WERE ROOMMATES *cackles*, sus haha, rough translation, pure comedy, shirt thing!, casual abuse :( (back story, traumatic childhood), I’m getting TharnType vibes (but not quite…), that note is precious, cry during/after sex, great angles, dialogue A+ 

Burlesque Night

Tags: completed, quickie/short story, stripper/body guard, coworkers, lust at first sight, magic mike vibes, fridays = getting fucked on stage O-O, well that was traumatizing af, took a bullet, real dicks, LDR, CUTE, I’m not in love with you… sure jan, OH WOW MASTER dlksaj;alsdkja;lsdkja;sld, gay awakening/first time, the art detail is *chefs kiss*, disappointed but not surprised :( :( :(, we stan a yes and lover, shirt thing, still not sure wtf the vertical anus thing is but full circle moment haha, you know what fuck it I’d re-read this 9/10

My one and only cat

Tags: ongoing, cat hybrids, god damn it I’m totally in furrydom ffs, ah well here we go, idol hot = loneliness wahhh /s, so hot he literally transforms other beings, omg a cat cafe CUTE, fuck that cat is cute *so fluffy*, stalker status, comedy, real dicks, I think the uncle would be supportive/jealous even I hope they talk about it I’m dying to know his thoughts, big tiddies, if this ain’t the cutest shit FLUFF/SMUT, copious amounts of cum, ate it with the panties on, CAKE, xmas, his milkshakes bring all the boy(cats) to the yard, trifling bitch

Imitation Mate

Tags: completed, omegaverse, alpha x alpha. Class rivals YAS, childhood frans, enemies to lovers omg this is all the shit I want, manipulation 1000 but yolo I ship it

Mr. 100% Perfect

Tags: ongoing, so relatable, OCD?, hoarder, when I read the title I thought mental illness and I was right, masks ugh RELATABLE, getting back together w ex, woof sibling drama/manipulation, suicide attempt, omg their communication regarding the psycho is REFRESHING, OMG JEJU ISLAND I see it in every fucking kdrama ever but this is the first time I’ve seen it mentioned in a manga *hm* interesting, furry furry everywhere, eye contact, finished reading season 1 pause for an omergaverse cause, okay I’m back and season 2 starting STRONG #1 men are gross #2 mans just went right to a blowie while mf was trying to pee lmao i can NOT the germs barf, fuckboi extraordinaire stressing over a textback is *great*, that istg face is perfect, HYUNGGGG, hand on his heart OW MY HEART, vibe check LOL, here for this plot dev, END OF SEASON2 NOOOOOOOimnotready. Head bonks CUTE

The origin of species

Tags: ongoing, omegaverse, sex tape, blackmail, i already don’t like this teacher, size difference, ‘JUST DIE’ hahahahahaha, I’m in love with noona, wait Ahjussi means uncle/mister? Dangerous convenience store has a new meaning to me now, DECEASED @they won’t, copious amounts of cum, alcohol to have intimacy *sighs in early 20s*, also WTF THEY ARE FUCKING AND THERE’S NO PHERMONE STUFF! What’s the point of being ABO without smell *swaggy p meme???*, wait okay ch 11 it begins, stockholm syndrome but since childhood I’m fairly certain *looking at you teacher I don’t trust these mfs*, dubcon obviously, also the can’t be knotted thing has me *cardi b meme that’s weird that’s sus* obvs poor bb about to get preg af, five word horror story: I won’t hurt you again *why tf you lyinggggg why u always lyinggg meme*, white collar crime, what’s the point of a contract when there’s no actual choice

How to Chase an Alpha

Tags: ongoing, lowkey been avoiding this one not because I think it’ll be bad I just..idk the brain is a weird thing, page 2 and I love mains attitude fucking gagged sass me bb, starting with rough translation but it be that way sometimes, GROUNDS HIMSELF BY TOUCHING HIS BLACK CARD I CANTTT, pheromone city fuck it UP, MC is a MOOD, mutual pining, when u and bae both hire PI’s to get info on each other, R-E-S-P-E-C-T, shirt thing, fucking chuffed about the rival fucking bring it, funny art, cheated on ugh mah heart I saw it coming and it still hurt, pure comedy this airport scene is so funny to me wtf, LDR, good ol murica fuckboi, LOVE HIM RIDE FOR UR MAN/MORALS, liams a little rapey rapist hm? No one’s ever said no… well being flooded with pheromones isn’t consent my dude, istg liam = I love it when they struggle, obvs jealousy/possessive tag but such is ABO, cat suit, BUNNY suit, sexy costumes, god damn it I love them that proposal/mpreg so cute, imprinting AW, ugh baes fam is so cute I needed that bc I wanna strangle wooyoungs dad, THE SECETARY is my fucking fav never stops being A+, SEC+LIAM?? Here for it *i ship it*, FUCK SO CUTE 12/10 re-read, fluff n smut, excited for how to chase an omegaside story hyung needs love!, JINI is mood, sales king I’m dying, that collar is ~hot~ btw

Egoism

Tags: completed (because jesus I can’t with ongoing, theheartbreakTM), UPDATE FML THE HEART BREAK IS REAL also no smut, omegaverse, hey stepbro, starts with rape, possessive/jealousy (isn’t all ABO?), age difference (6years, alpha is younger *can I get hyung plz lord*), HYUNG, woof this dad SUCKS, child abuse, rape culture *sigh*, I wanna get jacked like rick and summer and beat tf out of the dad, me n my cat, TELL EM HONEY I love this MC, traitor indeed, beta x omega btw, fated pair, coercive sex, didi going to be his own demise, BREAKUP/TIME SKIP NO this is BL hell, the rona is mentioned in this, ALL I WANT IS TO HEAR YOUR STORY WAHHHHHHHHHH also YES MY SHIP IS GOING TO SAIL I CAN FEEL IT, okay honestly frustrating a bit but also liked it yah 7-8/10, won’t re-read unless I’m looking for hurt though cause the comfort is BRIEF

Yarichin bitch bu

Tags: ongoing, reading because I watched this anime after seeing it mentioned in the comment section of -im-being-harassed-by-the-sexiest-man-of-the-year, anime was 2 eps a fucking wild the way this is uploaded SUCKS, no reality porn what plot rape-y ridiculous and now I need to read the source apparently haha, I need to know much more about yuri and blue hair guy ASAP (they have the spin off*adds to list*), high school setting, smut, studentsxstudents/teachers, photography club my ass, sex toys, kinky, crossdressing, gay awakening, unrequited love, jealousy, fake relationship, two faced people, OCD, COMEDY, rich people problems, hoarder, inferiority complex, one bed, toono is a dumbass in this love triangle or denial might be a better word, they are cousins my dude stop shipping it (I say to both toono and myself LOL), I wanna see Yuri’s face laksdjf;aldskf, vibrator #18 line is fucking iconic, yaguchi is about to get real interesting (BPD?), lies/manipulation, oh toono you sweet summer child, YURI i can’t wit chu, wait did he just punch the student because he won’t kiss him or???, dubcon/noncon obvs, finally my verse couple but they’re not a couple (yuri/tamu), they all care about each other is a weird way awwww, love confessions to pet vibrator scene are ICONIC MY DUDES I CAN NOTTT, lowkey living for Yuri’s drooling at this point, Jimi gives me such bad second hand embarrassment, Yuri the switch verse bb I’ve been looking for need more!, internalized homophobia, blackmail, MIDDLE FINGER IN THE AIR YAS KING, the heartbreak of ongoing/hasn’t been updated in years

Yarichin bitch bu dj wa

Tags: not completed I think, years old though, see above you know what it is, so cute omg, FIRST KISS AW, degradation kink?, MY VERSE COUPLE I’ve finally found you, biting, choking, rough sex, sex toys, they had fun together for another two hours DECEASED

Fucked by my Best Friend

Tags: ongoing, friends to lovers, body swap, Porn what plot, cannon threesomes in past maybe??(MFF for sure but MMF??), beach life, revenge, he became a HOT woman so honestly get over it, sloppy seconds, first off you’re both sluts second lmao this is going to be wild hm?, fellas is it gay if you kiss the homies, classic did you cum guy jfc, that’s how you get preg dumbass, ah the joys of being a woman /s assault in der clrub, *DEEP SIGH* @ you almost being raped turns me on, YES TURNING BACK DYING, gender has nothing to do with this LOL but true. Also yes cannon threesomes/orgies, googles frotting, mans like narrating playtime, intecurial sex public sex, lingerie, this is the closest thing to straight manga I’ve read hahaha, THE SCIENCE OMG FUCKING RIDIC :you need a mass amount of semen within you SURE JAN, possessive. Objectification, she trying to fuck without Shion LMAO, 34+35, do you think he’s on r/nofap, dry orgasm honestly impressed with mans rn ngl, spit as lube, anal fingering, just helping the homies find their prostate, bottom shaming (disappointed but not surprised), bis/gays in denial smh, question if he has a wet dream will he turn into a woman?, shirt thing, lol at female orgasm =anal in switcharoos mind, paging doc perv, shion is enjoying dressing up hm? Same dude, biggest reality gap is believing shion got admitted to a college HAHA, bad anatomy all over the place dude, rui is a dedicated exhibitionist, HE SO TIGHT BECAUSE THERES NO LUBE team no lube over here apparently not even a courtesy spit, yandere territory sort of?, Mayu with the dick wet comment is *chefs kiss*, THE HEARTBREAK OF ONGOING WAHHH I can’t believe I read all this but I can? 8/10 problematic possessive porn

[twopoppies]

update on the "my friend thought she was edgy cause she read one (1) het fic with a sex scene so unspicy it could have passed for White People Chicken" situation

she's fucking determined and i love that for her, but i also don't want her to end up traumatised, rocking in her chair harder than a subsitute teacher after being faced with the rowdy kids, so i'm guiding her through.

now, first, i tried to find a fandom we had in common so we could go straight to the fics. she threw a fit worse than the five-year-old i babysit and demanded i show her the same fics i read.

so i had to properly iniciate her to the one direction fandom, and consequently the larry war zone. i thought she'd get bored eventually, she didn't cause she's somehow more stubborn than i am, and that lead to her falling down the rabbit hole.

she cried. i cried. she got angry at the stunts. i got angry at the stunts. she lost faith in humanity after i told her there are some people that unironically believe in the stunts and the mortal enemies narrative. i never had any faith in humanity in the first place, but still.

so after almost of month of relentless research and about three larry-related sleepovers, we have finally gotten to The Good Bit.

now, i feel like she shouldn't be too shocked at what we're gonna work up to, cause after i explained to her the meaning of some songs (cough no control cough) along with...let's just say other things we know that came up during our totally scientific research, she has a pretty good idea of what she's getting into.

so, we make our way onto ao3, i show her how the filters work and immediately blacklist "rape/non-con", "major character death", and any rating that isn't G just to be sure, cause i don't want her to drop dead or something.

i said "alright love, we're gonna start easy, yeah? just short and sweet little things, 4k words tops cause we need to build up your attention span, all fluff, no sadness, no smut, just the feel-good, okay?"

she looked so happy i swear, it's like a golden retriever's been shown a squeeky toy.

so we start reading the summaries together, i force her to always read the tags cause i feel like if maybe i etch that habit into her brain from the get go she won't get any surprises mid-fic (totally not speaking from experience). and then some things happen.

her: wait, why not that one? the summary looks nice.

me: nah, even just in the summary you can see the repetitive sentences, lack of punctuation, and overall cliché-ness of the whole thing, i wanna make you read some good things.

her: *confused staring*

--

her: that one looks good!

me: are you serious? READ THE FUCKING TAGS, CAN'T YOU SEE THE "gratuitous blowjobs" TAG THERE, YOU ARE NOT READY FOR THAT, YOU SQUEAL LIKE A PIG IN A SLAUGHTER WHEN THEY HOLD HANDS, NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT, NO! WHO TAGGED THIS????

--

her: okay, that one looks like it has good grammar, the summary looks okay- oh no, you have your "i'm disowning you" face on right now, what's wrong?

me: i will not have you read 1st pov unless this is written in letter format. this is the good shit, not some cringey het wattpad fic, NO!

we finally settled on If You're Hoping for a Harbour by LadyLondonderry cause i read it a while ago and my notes said it was good, and she has a thing for the whole soulmates thing and magic. she giggled the whole way through, awed, and cooed, and did the little fangirl-omg-they-love-eachother dance and all. i feel like part one has been a success. now we can only hope that she'll stick to what i told her and start small, work her way up, not immediately go to hardcore stuff cause i'd rather not have her traumatised, thank you very much.

she did promise she'd text me the first fic she chose for each level of fanficness (we're going from fluff to angst, moving up into the ratings as we go so she'll have a healthier and smoother approach to this than we all did LMAO) so i suppose that should be good.

but one fic in and she sees why reading fanfics is my favourite past time. she has lost all interest for the book she was reading, completely understands why 1st pov sucks and 3rd pov is better, and was much quicker to spot the clichés and *slight* underlying misogyny in the book. it's gone away now. i'm so proud. my kid's growing.

also now i have someone to freak out with over louis on tour so that's cool.

okay, that was all, i'm just proud that i was able to convert a het-reader so quickly, at the same time as turning her into a larrie. AND i did that without completely spoiling her innocence. that feels like the biggest accomplishment of all. i mean sure, it's gonna last about one more week at most before she gets tired and goes for the smut but the thought's there.

Oh, that's a lovely fic to start with. @londonfoginacup has some great short and really nicely done smut-free fics. Good choice. Glad to hear you're guiding your friend well. LOL!

[heesulovebot]

bl/gl tag game

i was tagged by the lovely @gunsatthaphan​ thank u!!!! even tho this was the hardest thing ever lol i loved it 💕

your all time favourite bl character and why.

i’m just going to ignore the lack of plurals in that question and go with my top 5 faves (i’m a libra i can’t choose just one sobs). in no particular order:

tine teepakorn - i have never related to a bisexual character more. also he is sO dumb it hurts how much i love him dsknfkjdnf

kurosawa yuichi - he is the softest man, the biggest dork, and those smile whiskers literally cured my depression. idk man i just think he’s neat :(💕

kang seojun - there’s something inherently sad about seojun but the fact that he smiles through everything.... *head in fucking hands*

cha siwon - queen dasuel really knows how to write sympathetic-pathetic charas so well lmfao like, the secondhand embarrassment i got from him and the fact that i still adored him through it all. iconic, truly. another insecure character i relate to on a deeply personal level 🤪🤙

aoki sota - insecure bisexual.... holy shit i’m sensing a pattern here. he is pure of heart, dumb of ass, and i would kill a man for him and hashimoto

what’s your one character from a bl you wanted to punt into the stratosphere (you only get one so choose wisely).

aj i love you but i wanted to punt non so bad in dbk lmfaoooo

the best music moment from a bl.

wait idk what music moment means so uhm if we’re talking theme songs i still bump to gen y’s ost to this day an absolute banger. if we’re talking music in a scene... hands down scrubbs!!! still remember how the fandom lost it @ the headphone sharing concert scene in ep. 4 and it was all JA TUM TOOK TOOK YAANG 🗣️ ever since 

what’s a popular heterosexual text that you would like to see adapted into a bl/gl?

i’ll take any 90s rom-com but make it ✨queer✨ also: any jane austen!!  

a scene from a bl that always makes you laugh.

the white lion gang— particularly any line boss had (which you just know was a gunsmile adlib) but also the scene in s2g when the cake goes on fire and boss, the freak that he is, is like “cool!” whilst everyone else is freaking out around him jsdnfjdksn also i nearly died laughing when we walk into one of the scenes and boss is telling phukong “i knew your brother when he was this big [motions fist] and now he’s this big [slides hand down fist]” idkidk it’s just gunsmile’s expressions kill me. also: all of adachi’s spastic outbursts (esp when he’s with tsuge outside his apartment and then kurosawa’s ‘eh?’... omg also tsuge and adachi’s telepathic conversation in front of kurosawa dskjfnjfdnndksdjn) and green’s “what?!?!?!” lives rent-free in my head 24/7 

biggest disappointment.

tonhon chonlatee..... i don’t wanna talk about how bad that show was 😭😭😭 (and how i even managed to finish it,,, she’s a masochist, ur honour). RIP podd’s bl career 🙏 poddearth whEN

what two random bl/gl characters would make hilarious exes?

YIHWA AND FAI!!!! we_could_of_had_it_all.mp3 sobs

who would be the funniest person to watch a bl in its entirety and which one would you make them watch.

re-watching twm with @patspran​ was a hilarious ride 10/10 would do it again. as for making someone watch a bl, if i had to make anyone watch a bl i would probs make them watch light on me because it’s pretty much a hi-teen web drama and i feel like that’d be an easy way to ease someone into bls,,, slowly make our way up to thai bls lmfao 

best wardrobe moment/or character wardrobe from a bl.

miss yihwa was killing the game back in 2017 ur faves could never 😌 also everything nunew wears in that cutie pie show he is adorable. oh, also jang jaeyoung’s all-red tracksuit. simply iconic

tagging!🌈💕✨: @patspran @billlkin @itoldsunset @tehohaews @taeminie @mrdumpling @tontawantu @rashfcrd @earthfluuke @aquynh (only if you want to!!!)

[cyhyr]

Whumptober - No. 31

Fandom: Naruto

Rating: M

Pairing: Tenzō|Yamato/OC (implied); Iruka & Kakashi & Naruto

WC: ~3590

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply; dubious consent

Additional Tags: kidnapping (beneficial), pursuit, head injury, passing out, fever, bad medical practice, oral sex (non descriptive), poisoning

A/N: OMG I MADE IT I COMPLETED WHUMPTOBER 🥳🥳🥳 Consider this a sort of continuation of yesterday's fic, from Tenzo's POV. Also, introducing: Otter's name underneath the mask! Plus more Otter backstory.

Tagging for Whumptober: @sweetysamaa, @atereal, @kelkage, @stupidbadgers

To read more, check out my Missing Nin Verse tag

~

Tenzō follows his other two squadmates through the trees, hoping against hope that they don’t pick up Kakashi-senpai’s trail. He’s not sure what he’ll do if he does see Kakashi, but he was selected for a retrieval mission and—and he’s going to bring Kakashi home. Because yes, he’s very loyal to Kakashi, as the first person who ever saw Tenzō for Tenzō, and he’s sure Kakashi had his reasons for kidnapping the jinchūriki and that genin, but Tenzō… he has to draw the line somewhere.

And that line is drawn at killing Sandaime. The investigating ANBU all agreed that Kakashi’s scent was all over the room when they found Sandaime’s body, and so he must have been the last one to see Sandaime alive. And then he went and defected, kidnapping a helpless genin and the toddler jinchūriki, and… Tenzō can admit that something doesn’t add up. Because he remembers Kakashi talking about the genin who was kidnapped—Umino Iruka—and there’s no way that Kakashi would take Iruka along, to put Iruka into so much danger.

At least. The way that Kakashi talked about Iruka…

“Why so glum, chum?”

Tenzō turns to look at Rakko—Otter, shit, they’re in their masks—as the medic falls back to match his stride.

“You need to be further up,” Tenzō says. “The medic is supposed to be in the center of travel formations.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’ve said your piece, now answer my question.”

Tenzō sighs and smiles behind his mask. “Just. Thinking.” He watches Otter sigh and make a gesture with their hand that so obviously means go on. He drops his voice to a low murmur, so Snake and Turtle don’t overhear, and continues, “I don’t think that Kakashi-senpai would do what the Godaime is claiming. It doesn’t make sense, nor does it follow what I know of senpai’s character.”

Otter hums, and then says, “Then we ask him when we catch up!”

“It’s not going to be that simple.”

“Isn’t it?” Otter gives him a little head tilt and Tenzō feels butterflies in his stomach. “We’ll give him the benefit of the doubt, yeah? Let him say his piece before we bring him home.”

“Our orders are to reclaim the jinchūriki and the genin. Kakashi—”

“Is kill on sight, yeah,” Otter scoffs. “Do you really think a four-person squad is going to be enough to take out that calibre of legend?”

Tenzō laughs, once, quietly. “You have a point…”

~

They find Kakashi while he’s in the forest inspecting some wild berries. Turtle gives the order—Strike relentlessly, no mercy, Kakashi goes down. And then Snake is leading the engagement with a scattering of senbon and Turtle moving in to continue the fight with taijutsu and ninjutsu.

Senpai is just as amazing as Tenzō recalls, and he had informed Godaime that they should bring two squads if they truly want to recover the jinchūriki, but he was told that his opinion didn’t matter. They should have brought a second squad.

“Where’s Racoon? And Crane?” Kakashi asks in-between punches with Turtle.

Tenzō is scouting the area, trying to find the genin and jinchūriki, but he keeps an ear out for the conversation.

“They’re dead,” Turtle snaps, “you should know.”

Tenzō hears Kakashi’s whining gasp and stops in his search to watch Kakashi jump back and wipe at his face. “I—”

“Head injuries are notoriously difficult to treat,” Snake hisses. “And you fucked with all of us. Turtle and I were lucky that Crane got to us first before he died too. Racoon just never woke up.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—”

“Fuck off, Hatake. You’re dead.”

The fight continues, but Turtle and Snake are clearly emotionally compromised and it’s affecting their fighting and Kakashi is… still as efficient as Tenzō remembers. Turtle and Snake go down in a heap, even though Kakashi is very obviously not fighting at his full strength, and that’s curious in itself because he’s never known Kakashi to hold back while fighting unless he’s injured. But senpai isn’t favoring a limb, nor is the visible part of his face flushed with a fever.

Tenzō is about to go out to stop the fight, to tell Kakashi he wants to talk, to hear his side of the story because gods there has to be a second side. But then Otter comes out of their bushes and flickers to Turtle and Snake’s side and starts in with their diagnostic jutsu and Kakashi catches sight of them and—

And Tenzō isn’t fast enough with his shout of, “No, Kakashi-senpai, wait!!”

But it’s too late.

Kakashi drives a non-lethal blow to Otter’s temple. Otter collapses over Snake’s body and Tenzō forgets himself—

“RAKKO!”

He’s beside them in a flicker, cradling their limp body in his arms and ripping off both of their masks. Across the way, Kakashi gasps and moans despairingly but Tenzō doesn’t care—Rakko is limp and quiet and Rakko is never quiet. He turns and glares up at Kakashi.

“Ten—”

“If they don’t wake up, I’ll never forgive you,” he snarls. “They were just doing their job, and they wanted to hear you out, fuck, why would you—”

“Tenzō, I’m sorry. I didn’t know. I didn’t know Rakko-chan had joined up, I thought they were still in training, I’m sorry.” Kakashi is beside him, apologizing and tripping over himself and finally he says, “There’s a village two miles from here. They have a good doctor. I’ll pay, can you move them?”

“What, all of them??”

“N-no, just—”

“I’m not you, senpai, I can’t just leave my squadmates to die!!”

And that. That came out wrong. But Tenzō won’t take it back, just looks over at Kakashi with his lip curled and seethes, “Just go. Go do whatever you need to do. I won’t follow.” He ducks his head to press his forehead to theirs and holds back the tears. “Gods, please, please wake up…”

“Tenzō... I’m sorry.”

“That doesn’t mean much if Rakko dies here,” he sniffs. “Just go.”

Kakashi picks himself up and flickers away. And Tenzō leans over Rakko and cradles them to his chest and cries and cries and cries praying to whatever gods are listening that they’ll wake up.

~

They do, eventually, wake up; weak moans and a rolling neck are Tenzō’s first cues, and he makes sure that Rakko is comfortable as they open their eyes. He nearly sobs in relief, but then Rakko speaks, and the first slurring words out of their mouth are, “Did you find out what happened?”

“...no.”

Rakko nods, looks over at Falcon and Snake, still unconscious, and says, “They’ll be alright. Let’s go.”

“Go?”

“You need answers. We won’t go missing for too long.” Rakko grins. They pick up their mask off the ground and hang it on their belt, and then stand up on shaky legs. “C’mon. You need this.”

“He knocked you out. He could have killed you. Why would I even bother?”

“Because he was the first one to acknowledge you as you, and not as the Mokuton Kid. Because he’s your senpai. Because you’ll kick yourself if we go home and never find out why he left.”

Tenzō doesn’t want to see Kakashi again right now, but Rakko’s right. They’re always right. He has to know the point behind killing Sandaime and kidnapping the jinchūriki and a genin. They drag Turtle and Snake into a deep copse of bushes and put up a barrier around them, and leave them with pain medicine for when they wake up. Rakko does give them each one last diagnostic sweep to make sure they’re both on the mend, and after they give him a nod, Tenzō leads them out back onto the trail.

Not twenty minutes later they come to the village Kakashi must have been talking about. They stop outside of the village and change out of their ANBU uniform and put on more comfortable civvies. They remain armed, of course, and Rakko takes Tenzō’s elbow as they walk into the village. The first person that seems friendly, Rakko drags him over and asks politely, “We’re supposed to meet up with a friend of ours, could you have seen him? He’s about this tall, silver spiky hair, arms like whoa? He’s travelling with a younger teen and a toddler.”

The woman smiles and points down the main road. “You must be talking about Inei-kun. He’s been hanging around the apothecary’s for a few days now. It’s the fifth building on the right.”

“Thanks!”

“Thank you,” Tenzō says demurely.

The two of them start down the street and Rakko says, “This is convenient. I gotta restock some of my kit anyway.”

But when they get there, the door is locked. It’s not quite sunset; it should be open for business still. Tenzō makes a sigh like he’s disappointed, and leads Rakko around the corner of the building. Silently, they continue down the alley and peek into each window as they pass until finally—

“Found the jinchūriki,” Rakko murmurs. “And the missing genin.” They lift the window and slip inside, and Tenzō follows just as quietly. He frowns. Both of them are curled up together in a treatment bed, and while the jinchūriki looks well, the genin—Iruka—has a sickly flush of fever on his cheeks and is breathing heavily through slightly parted lips. He doesn’t even have to confirm with Rakko; they’re already searching the room for a treatment plan or a file.

“They’re still Konoha,” Rakko mutters. “I’m gonna see what I can do for him.”

“Alright,” Tenzō says. “I’m going to search for the apothecary and Kakashi. I’ll find you again in ten minutes.”

Tenzō carefully creeps out the door and into a short hallway, and immediately can hear Kakashi’s voice from behind a closed door a few paces down. It’s faint, though, and he can’t make out what his senpai is saying. He goes to the door and presses his ear against it, and yanks his head back as quickly as he could. He also takes a few steps back, until his shoulders are pressed to the wall opposite the door. He covers his nose and stares at the closed door in horror.

He can hear Kakashi now, and gods he wished he hadn’t.

They have a good doctor. I’ll pay.

Tenzō hadn’t thought about it at the time, but he’s realizing now that Kakashi doesn’t have access to the Hatake clan funds as a missing nin. How had he thought that Kakashi would have paid for Rakko’s treatment?

Clearly, Kakashi’s plan then was the same as it is now.

The smell of sex and the harsh clap of skin on skin through the door, accompanied by whimpers and moans and—

“Fuck, kid, you’re tight, you sure you’re not virgin?”

—Tenzō hurries back to the treatment room where Iruka-kun and the jinchūriki are. To Rakko he says, “We have to get them out of here.”

“Can’t.”

“What—”

“The genin has septicemia,” Rakko sighs. “He’ll die without antibiotics, and the ones in his treatment plan have to be kept cold. I don’t know how much he’s already been given either; this treatment file is garbage. But I can’t take the risk; we can’t move him.”

“But…” Kakashi’s never been one for sex, and he’s... Gods, what sort of life are they living now, that it’s more preferable than being in the village? What are they running from??

Rakko heals what they can, and then when Iruka and the toddler show signs of waking up, they both scurry away out the window to keep watch. An hour later, Kakashi comes stumbling in with two bowls of soup, and gently shakes Iruka to help wake him up. He sets one bowl aside and feeds the other one to Iruka, one spoonful at a time. They’re talking quietly, and Tenzō can’t figure out what they’re saying, but then the toddler wakes up and Kakashi hands him the other bowl.

The jinchūriki devours the soup like he is starving. Tenzō hopes that’s not the case.

Then Iruka pushes his half-eaten portion away, causing Kakashi to frown. He sets the bowl on the side table, puts his palm on Iruka’s forehead, and frowns. He steps out of the room, and Tenzō watches Iruka gather the jinchūriki to his side. They wait and wait and wait, and eventually the toddler falls back asleep. Even Iruka looks drowsy. They’d been sleeping for most of the evening… What was in that soup??

Rakko also notices, and growls, “They’ve been drugged. Tenzō, no oral medicine takes effect that quickly, they’re being poisoned.”

And that’s enough for Tenzō. He flicks the window open and hops inside, quickly followed by Rakko. Iruka, with shaky hands, pulls a kunai from beneath his pillow and rolls the toddler behind him as much as he can. “Touch him only with hands you don’t want anymore,” the genin snarls and it would be a lot more threatening if he didn’t know the teen had just been drugged and was at death’s door with septicemia.

He holds up his hands. “I’m here to help. Can you stand?”

“I’ll scream and Kakashi will destroy you. Get back.”

“Iruka-senpai,” Rakko steps in the window, waving. “Seriously, we’re here to help.”

“Rakko?”

“You two know each other?!”

Rakko smiles. “He was a year above me in the academy. Helped me out with the substitution jutsu a few times!”

“What—”

But faintly, he can hear someone gagging, and he knows he has to get everyone out of here. That Kakashi can’t keep this up, not without serious mental repercussions; and it’s not like senpai is particularly stable as it is. Rakko approaches Iruka and starts asking about what sort of treatment he’s already been given, cursing a few times, and Tenzō shuffles around the room gathering what looks like their things. He shoves the storage scrolls in his pack, and checks back in with Rakko.

“He’ll be alright, once we get him out of here. The septicemia has been treated, but he’s maintaining a fever, and it’s likely because of the medicine this hack is using. Southern Great Pines are great for making antibiotic tinctures, but they induce a horrible fever.”

“I’ll pretend I know what you’re talking about. Can you take them and get to an inn? I’ll find you in a bit, once I’ve got Kakashi.”

“I don’t wanna leave without him,” Iruka says.

“We just want to talk,” Rakko says. “There’s obviously two sides to this story, and we want to hear yours.”

“I… Rakko-chan, please, you can’t honestly expect me to just go with you.”

“I promise,” Rakko raises their hand. “We just want to talk. I’m gonna get you and the kiddo to an inn, and I’ll whip up a proper treatment for you. Then Tenzō will bring Kakashi-san along and we’ll all sit down and talk.”

“And if you don’t approve of our reasoning?”

Rakko sighs. “Iruka-senpai, if we wanted to just take you and the jinchūriki, we have been outside your window for hours now. We’ve had plenty of opportunities. Please, we just wanna talk.”

Tenzō can see that Iruka’s still hesitant to go, but he does take up the toddler against his shoulder, and then follows them out the window. Tenzō lifts up the collar of his shirt to cover his face, just like how senpai wears his, and stalks along the hallway to where he hears the slurping and gagging noises. He takes a second to gather himself, focuses his chakra, and then kicks the door open.

Of all things, this was not what Tenzō ever wanted to see. The apothecary is holding Kakashi by the hair and brutally using his throat. The man is moaning and his eyes are rolled back, and Kakashi has tears rolling down his cheek as he tries to just take it and—he’s not proud of how he does this, but the apothecary is lucky that Tenzō shoots out only a single beam of wood and knocks him on the bottom of his chin, breaking his neck and killing him instantly.

He enters the room to stand by Kakashi, who is still on his knees, the dead fuck’s dick slipping out of his mouth. Tenzō puts a hand on Kakashi’s shoulder carefully; he is still and in shock. “We need to go,” Tenzō says.

Kakashi clears his throat and lifts one hand to wipe his cheek, his mouth, and then rights his mask up over his nose. His voice is wrecked as he says, “I’m not going back. I’ll fight you if I have to, but—”

“Otter—Rakko—they’re with Iruka-kun and the jinchūriki. They’re going to an inn.”

“Iruka can’t—”

“The apothecary was giving him faulty medicine. He’s going to be alright. We need to go.”

It takes Tenzō physically lifting Kakashi under his arms to get him to stand up again, but within a minute or two they’re moving and leaping across the sparse rooftops, following the tingle of Rakko’s chakra that Tenzō would know anywhere. He helps Kakashi slip through the window and stumble into the room. Iruka-kun is there in an instant, wrapping arms around Kakashi and diving his nose into his neck.

“Are you okay?” Iruka mutters, and Tenzō leaves them alone and goes over to the bed where the jinchūriki is laying in Rakko’s lap and sleeping. Kakashi and Iruka stay holding each other for a long moment, talking quietly.

“How’s the jinchūriki?” Tenzō asks.

“Naruto,” Rakko says. “And he’s alright, just exhausted. They’ve been running ragged for weeks.” Rakko pets Naruto’s hair while the toddler sleeps. “They all need to rest,” they say. “They’ve had a fucking month from hell.”

~

Eventually the four teens sit down facing each other—Rakko hands Naruto back to Iruka the second the genin asks—and they talk. And talk, and talk; and eventually it all comes out why they left.

“Danzō will warp him,” Kakashi says. “I—we couldn’t let that happen.”

“I understand,” Tenzō says, remembering how Danzō had treated him and the other trainees of ROOT. “But I don’t understand why you killed Sandaime, if you knew this would happen?”

Iruka snaps, “They’re saying what??”

Rakko nods. “The investigation revealed that Kakashi-kun was the last to see Sandaime alive, that his scent and chakra particles were all over the room. Godaime said that of course the ‘friend-killer’ would want to step up his infamy and become a ‘kage-killer’ instead.”

Iruka growls. “What the fuck—”

“We don’t believe it,” Tenzō says quickly, watching Kakashi’s face fall with every word. “Please, please tell us what happened.”

“Sandaime passed,” Kakashi murmurs. His shoulders hunch over, and Iruka wraps an arm around his back and pulls him to his shoulder. Kakashi breathes heavily into Iruka’s neck, and continues, “He told me to take care of Naruto, that Danzō’s vision for the village would destroy him. But even if he hadn’t said to do it, Tenzō, you know I couldn’t let it happen.”

“But you didn’t kill Sandaime?”

“No! He was a terrible man who didn’t act the way he spoke, and his values were messed up, but I would never have killed him. He was already dying when I went to see him. It was a usual meet-up we had, one o’clock in the morning.”

“Already dying…?” Rakko hums, thinking, and then asks, “What else do you remember?”

“Not much, I’m sorry. He was pale and coughing up blood, and I offered to get him a medic but—”

“Did you smell anything off about him?”

“I… no? Maybe?”

Rakko leans forward anxiously. “His breath. Did it smell like raw onions and garlic?”

Tenzō lifts a brow. “Rak—”

But Rakko holds up a hand to stop him, and he instead turns back to Kakashi and watches the dawning horror across his face. “Actually,” he says slowly, “yes. Yes, that’s. What is it?”

Rakko snarls. “An ingestible poison that is designed for its traces to be gone before the victim even dies. The last stage of its metabolization is fast, but you can tell because it causes lesions in the throat and lungs and really bad breath.”

“Sandaime was assassinated,” Tenzō murmurs.

“I swear, Tenzō—”

“We know it wasn’t you,” Rakko says. “But we have to figure out who really did it.” They stand up and gesture for Tenzō to do the same. “We have to go back.”

“What—no, Tenzō, Rakko-chan, they’ll kill you both for communicating with me.”

“Not if they don’t find out about this,” Tenzō nods. “Rakko’s right. You and Iruka-kun, you need to stay with Naruto and keep him safe. But we’ll go back, we’ll get Turtle and Snake and go home, and we’ll investigate on our own.”

Rakko smiles. “We’ll find a way to keep you updated with our progress. We’re going to clear your name, okay?”

Iruka shakes his head. “It’s not worth it. You two can’t put your necks out like this. Even if they find out who killed Sandaime, as long as Danzō is in power Naruto isn’t safe in Konoha.”

“We’ll figure something out,” Tenzō says. “Senpai, we’ll figure this out, okay?”

Kakashi frowns. “Don’t let him get you, too. Remain vigilant.”

Tenzō nods, and before Kakashi can resist, dives in and hugs him. Rakko giggles behind them, and Iruka chuckles from the side, but Tenzō relishes being close and sinks into KAkashi’s hold when he wraps his arms around Tenzō’s shoulders and back.

He and Rakko leave quietly, and head back into the forest, new mission in mind: find out what happened to Sandaime, because someone in the Village Leadership is lying to everyone.

[lightns881]

hi sorry i just come here to have a little rant. why is there a lot of fucked up shit on dream/george tags on ao3 though? i came from a larry and phan based before and ive never seen their tags being flooded by gorey shits this much. omg sorry i just need to write this down to vent. feel free to ignore me. lmao

Hi anon! That's alright, you can vent all you want in my asks! Everyone has different tastes. If you're referring to dead dove: don't read stories and stories with a lot of content and trigger warnings, I can't say I know why.

I was never a part of the Larry and Phan fandoms (this is actually my first m|m ship), but I know there's probably a few current dnf fans who were once in them. I can't say I would know the age range back then but if some of those fans grew older, they likely maturated and so did their writing with them. Younger people don't tend to write these kinds of stories. It could also be that now that you're older, you're noticing more of these.

Regardless, you can chose to filter out content with those tags if you'd like and don't already know how to do that. I'll give a little tutorial for those who'd like to know:

1. Press the filters button below the tag

2. It's going to bring up a filters bar and what you're going to focus on is this exclude section

3. You're going to go to the warnings dropdown and chose the ones you'd like to exclude and you can also chose to filter out any words that appear in the summary or tags if you write it in "other tags to exclude" and hit enter. You can also exclude certain ratings like mature or explicit

The tags are mostly self-explanatory. Creator Chose To Not Use Archive Warnings means there's probably at least one of the following warning tags or some separate trigger warning but they do not want to spoil the story so you must proceed with caution and decide if you want to read or not, Graphic Depictions of Violence might contain gore, blood, war and other forms of violence, Major Character Death (MCD) contains some sort of death from one of the characters the author listed as main, Rape/Non-Con either contains rape or has some non-consensual elements somewhere in the story though not always the main ship, and Underage means it depicts underage characters, often in sexual scenerios but sometimes writers tag for just romance or heaty sessions or even drug use, etc..

Of course not every story will be tagged right, especially with many Wattpaders migrating and not knowing how to properly tag their stories, but at least ~80% I'd say is.

Hope this helps and I'm sorry it bothers you, but some people do enjoy reading and writing certain forms of content, and that is totally fine. That's why the filters exist, so we can all filter the content we don't like to see and the kind we do :))

Have a great day! <3

[sleekervae]

The Neighbour [1.7]

Masterlist

Trigger Warning: kitchen smut ahead!!

Remington never found it so easy to write before, but writing about Eva came as naturally as doing a kickflip on his skateboard. And it wasn't often that Remington found himself able to write something of the happier genre, but it encompassed everything that Eva was about -- pure happiness, a dubious certainty about where he was heading in his future.

It also became obvious that Eva had all the inspiration she needed for her poetry, anybody could see that just be looking through her blog. Post after post rectified wild romances and reflected on soft mornings with coffee and slow kisses, enough to make any reader yearn for the solace and euphoria she had found in Remington. Just the other day, fans of both her and Remington exploded when she finally posted the finished draft of The Gallery.

Despite the Instagram stories, tagged posts and reactive comments under pictures, Remington and Eva had yet to come out as a public couple to the Palaye fanbase. Remington, despite loving his fans to the moon and back, knew that some liked to get a little too involved in his personal life, and he wasn't sure Eva was ready to be exposed to the flux of public opinion that was sure to whirlpool around them constantly. Eva expressed her emotions through her art, and despite being so open about her feelings she was still quite a private person; as well as little introverted, just like he was.

And having random people psychoanalyze everything about his relationship made him uncomfortable, nonetheless.

Though there was speculation in the Palaye fandom, the fans took to the Eva gossip well. She was a sweet girl with a beautiful heart, it wasn't hard for people to like her at all. She was beginning to get tagged in posts from fan accounts, some pictures screenshots of her with Remington in Caity's or Larissa's story, or the occasional selfie she would take of herself and re-filtered by another user.

"OMG they cute!!!"

"I ❤️ them!"

"She's so pretty"

"Rem looks so happy 😍😍"

Everybody was very nice, although, there were those who took to the idea of Eva not as happily as most did.

"Who the fuck is this bitch???"

"She looks boring 🤮🤮"

"Don't tell me rem actually likes her!!"

It was comments like that that made Eva want to throw her phone out the window. As much as she needed social media to boost her career, she also wanted to burn it in a dumpster fire and roast marshmallows of satisfaction over it.

"Did she pump her lips?! 🤥🤥"

It was that particular comment that had Eva tossing her phone on the counter, annoyed at the stupid side-by-side comparison some fan had put together of her for a non-existent conspiracy. She knew focusing on this media garb was pointless, but seeing total strangers scrutinize her -- simply for who she was hanging out with -- and reading all these derogatory comments tore a strip off of her.

Remington noticed how quiet she had been all morning, it started when they had gotten back from their breakfast outing and she was seemingly on her phone for the better part of the hour. He had a lump in his throat, having a pretty broad idea of what it was that was bothering Eva.

"Now remember, the phone can't fight back," he tried to joke. Eva forced a small smile, but feigned little reaction. Remington waltzed over from his spot on the couch, with Pluto being annoyed as the ear scratches had come to a sudden stop, "What's the matter?"

"Nothing," Eva shook her head, though her face told a different story. She wasn't so good about lying to Remington. He grabbed her phone, and despite her protests, opened the thread of Instagram comments. Nearly all of them were hating on Eva. He glared at the ugly words as though he could hear the slurs shudder through his ears.

"Did she pump her lips..." he read aloud. Eva crossed her arms over her chest, knowing exactly what Remington was going to think, "Eva, you know not to take this shit seriously, right? They're just bullshit haters,"

"I know..." she nodded, refusing to look him in the eye.

"And if they were really my fans, they wouldn't be saying that sort of shit about the people I love," he assured her.

"I know," Eva nodded again, taking back her phone, "It's just stupid words, I know. It just gets kind of hard to ignore when it's constant. And they keep tagging me in everything so of course I'll see it,"

"You can turn your notifications off, or better yet, just block them," he said, shaking his head, "I can tell you first hand how easy it is to let yourself get tied up in this sort of stuff, but it doesn't mean anything. You're worth more to me than any stupid comment,"

"Yeah..." She hummed as Remington's lips pressed against her hair, his words quiet but comforting as he started whispering, trying to convince her that she was indeed his everything. His arms wrapped around her waist as he held her, his skin warm against hers where they've touched. Her toes curled against the tiles as he kissed her neck, nose nuzzled behind her ear as he lightly grabbed her hips, fingers tangling into the hem of her shirt to playfully tug on it. Eva laughed against his lips when he kissed her, his hands sneaking under her shirt to pull her even closer to his own body, and she let him have his moment.

"You have the most incredible soul," he said, "And you're always the warmest and softest person. Those people will never know you the way I do,"

Her frustration was quickly replaced by ease, enhanced by lust simmering on the back burner in her brain, "You're worth more to me than I think you'll ever know, Rem,"

Remington lightly tickled her sides, teeth biting on her lobe as he whispered another set of flirty remarks in her ear, and she felt warm at his touch, his breath hot on her neck and face. It almost felt like he didn't know the effect he had on her -- he just needed her to know how special she was. His hands slid higher, still tickling and teasing. She felt the familiar feeling of her arousal as a finger lightly brushed against her nipple, palms sliding up to cup her breasts and lightly squeeze them. Rem chuckled as she pushed back, melting against his chest as he caressed her skin, his thumb circling around the hardening nub.

"Told you, you're warm and soft," he kissed her cheek again, fingers giving a light tweak to her nipples, "Well, except for those two,"

"You have terrible jokes," she giggled, biting her bottom lip as his palms squeezed her again, rubbing against the sensitive skin.

"And you have two very hard nipples begging for attention," he spun her around so his chest was pressed to her back, blew hot air against her ear, never stopping with his teasing touches.

He liked this game, pulling her close and making her beg for him as he grabbed and caressed her, his touches switching from soft to hard, from teasing to pleasuring. Eva never resisted his playful touches, and soon she would start pleading with him to give her something more. But she'd lost herself in the heady feeling as his fingers tweaked her nipples, thumbs circling around them, making them hard and peaked, his warm palms rubbing against them to soothe the feeling, only to start again and again.

Remington pressed his hips against her bum, and she could feel him hardening through his joggers, rubbing against her as he continued whispering in her ear, hands never leaving her breasts. He licked the spot where neck and shoulder met, sucking it gently while his fingers flicked her hard nipples, and in seconds Eva felt her knees buckle as pleasure ran through her body, making her grab onto the counter she was pinned against. Remington let out a moan paired with a quiet fuck, rutting himself against her as she trembled, suddenly feeling hot and out of breath, legs shaky as she chased the last waves of her orgasm.

"Fuck, babe, did you just come from a little nipple play?" Remington sucked her earlobe into his mouth, tugging it lightly with his teeth, "You just soaked your panties. I can feel it on my cock,"

She let out a pathetic whine and nodded, cheeks burning and feeling shy all of a sudden as Remington slid his hand from her shirt to unbutton her shorts and dip between her thighs, palm cupping her through her wet panties. His fingers stroked along the soaked fabric, a chuckle leaving his lips as he circled her swollen clit, making Eva whimper and push back against him again.

"You've made such a mess, babygirl," his fingertip pushed under her panties, running along her lips to gather some of her juices, only to pull back and find its way into Remington's mouth so he could lick it off, "I guess I have to clean you up now,"

He grabbed onto her hips and turned her around, hands sliding under her ass to cup her cheeks before suddenly picking her up and sitting her on the counter. His lips captured hers in a kiss as his fingers tangled into the sides of her panties, tugging them down her legs then sliding his hands back on the inside of her thighs.

"Spread your legs for me," he whispered his command against her lips, nipping on the bottom one, "Show me how wet that little pussy is after you came all over yourself from a little teasing,"

"Rem –" she whined as he nuzzled her nose, hot breath tickling her skin as he pulled her to the edge.

"I've said..." he pushed her knees apart and stepped between them, "Spread your legs. I'll take good care of you,"

He tapped her side and she did as she was told, face turning another shade of red as she  exposed herself to his eyes and touch. Remington groaned at the sight of her wet sex, his warm palms rubbing against the inside of her thighs as he leaned closer, thumbs spreading her lips. His eyes bore into hers as his tongue swiped between her folds, swirling around her clit before repeating his action, this time with a little more pressure.

"Delicious," he smacked his lips, giving another long lick to her, "You're fucking gorgeous, babe."

"Rem... please," her fingers tangled into his bleached hair, trying to pull him closer, "No teasing..."

"But that's the best part!" he chuckled, pressing kisses on her thighs, "How you start begging for me to eat your pussy. You know what to do, don't you?"

"Rem–" she bit her lip with another whine, cheeks heating up at his words.

"Darling, use your words," he whispered on her skin, lips pressing just above her clit, "You know how I like it,"

"Oh my God... please, eat my pussy, I'm begging you!" Eva let her words spill out of her as sure as it was a frantic prose, head thrown back and fingers tugging on Remington's hair, hips moving to try and get closer to him, "I want your tongue on me -- in me -- please Rem!"

"That wasn't too hard, was it?" he flicked her clit with his tongue, brushing his nose against it as he went lower, licking around her entrance, "You love begging for me, don't you? It got you even wetter,"

"C'mon! You  promised!" a frustrated huff left her mouth, still trying to wiggle closer. "Remington!"

"Did no such thing," he pinched her thigh, licking between her folds again at the same time, "But it's time to clean up the mess you've made,"

"You made," she corrected, and he pinched her again.

With this he dived back between her legs, fingers rubbing against her lips as he spread them, eating her pussy eagerly, tongue probing against her hole before going back to lick her swollen clit. Her fingers tangled into his hair, tugging on the messy locks and Remington moaned against her pussy, quickening the pace against her lips. He grabbed onto her thighs, pulling them over his shoulders to bury his face between them, sucking the hard nub between his lips.

Eva felt her thighs shake and tighten around his head as her next orgasm slammed into her, fingers pulling on his hair to push him away, but Remington was stronger. He grabbed her hand and held it next to her body as he licked her through the orgasm, not caring how sensitive she were from his previous teasing. He moaned against her again as he felt her relax for a second, only to double his efforts until he felt her body tense, bringing her to a third climax before she could even ride out the second one.

With shaking thighs and wobbly arms she sat up, pushing him back to make him stop, her body sensitive even from the lightest of touches. Remington chuckled as he leaned against the counter, pressing a kiss on her knee when she crossed her legs. She could see her own juices shining on his lips, and she felt her stomach do another little flip when she saw him lick them off with a cheeky smile.

"That good, huh?" he lightly rubbed her sides, fingers playfully tugging on her shirt.

"Shut up," she let out a laugh, hiding behind her hands, pretending to be annoyed, "You can't just lick your lips like that, and expect me to not get turned on again,"

"Fair argument" he pulled her up, making her wrap her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist, and she moaned as he pressed himself against her pussy, his voice turning breathy, "Was it good?"

"As always," she grinned.

"Than believe me when I say this feeling you have is what I want you to focus on, not that other bullshit," he nodded to her phone, "You're absolutely perfect in every single way imaginable, don't let those fuckers make you think otherwise,"

Eva pushed her lips to his, "I love you... so friggin' much," and Remington smiled, his fingers tangling back in her hair.

He kissed the tip of her nose, her heart warming as she scrunched her nose and she giggled, "I love you more,"

Remington looked down at the cheap drugstore eyeliner, mascara and a basic eyeshadow palette with dismay, glancing at Eva as she sat patiently on the closed-lid toilet. She knocked her knees together to break the silence.

"Is this all you own?" he asked incredulously.

Eva nodded, "It's all I've ever needed," she replied simply.

He stared. pointedly at the tube of mascara, "You actually have no foundation, or highlight, o-or even contour?"

She chuckled sheepishly, "I mean -- I... no?"

When she had asked earlier if he would make her over before heading out, Remington was delighted -- not realizing the challenge that was ahead of him until he saw her three little pieces of makeup, "So, you just never experimented with makeup?" he asked.

Eva shook her head, "Never really thought about it," his continual stunned state made her nervous, "Is that bad? That I don't use makeup?"

"Absolutely not! I love your natural face," he told her, "I just -- when you asked me to do your makeup, I was expecting... well -- more to work with,"

"Well, I thought you would just do some pretty eye makeup? Like you usually do, just not too extreme," she shrugged.

"I can still do that," he picked up the eyeliner, frowning at the dull end that clearly hadn't been sharpened in eons, "I will need some of my tools, though,"

Eva licked her lips, following him out of her bathroom and he raced for her door, "Don't go away, I'll be two minutes," he pecked her forehead, "And first thing tomorrow, I'm going to show you an incredible store called Sephora,"

She rolled her eyes with a faint simper, going to sit on her couch, "I'll be here!"

He didn't take very long at all, rushing past Emerson as he read his novel without a word. And Emerson was none too pressed to ask his brother what the fuss was about, not like he had the time to as Remington was back out the door seconds later, a blank paper bag in his hands. He wondered if he'd remember that they were supposed to go the skatepark later?

Remington pulled out a variety of unfamiliar palettes and bottles Eva had altogether breezed past whenever she was in the makeup aisles. She was fascinated, picking up a small gold bottle with sparkling flakes inside.

"What's a primer for?" she asked.

Remington was gobsmacked momentarily, the innocence and wonder in her eyes enough to make his heart swell, "What's a pri -- oh my God! I have so much to teach you!" his own excitement was buzzing through his body and permeating hers, "This is gonna' be fun!"

Eva tried not to fidget too much as she sat on the sink of her bathroom, with Remington staring over his collection carefully, looking back at her own delicate face to make his decision. Eva was fortunate to have near-flawless skin and high cheekbones, and the sparkling crystalline hue in her eyes was sure to compliment any color he put on her eyelids. Her knee kept bouncing up and down.

"Are you nervous?" he asked endearingly.

"I wouldn't say nervous," she replied, trying to stifle a laugh, "I'd say more... anxious? Apprehensive?"

He smiled as he picked up his primer, his voice changing in pitch and thick with sass, "Darling, don't you worry. You're gonna' look so fabulous after I'm done with you!"  

Eva quirked an eyebrow, smirking to herself, "You're adorable,"

He then set to work, applying a thin layer of the cool gel from the gold tube and rubbing it gently into her skin. Eva's knee continued to bounce, and it wasn't so much of a problem until Remington tried to brush contour onto her cheeks and she kept shaking.

"I need you to stay still," he giggled lightly.

Eva's cheeks flushed -- with no help from the blush he had ready to go -- and nodded, putting both hands on her knees to keep them still, "Sorry,"

"It's okay," he wouldn't let her see her reflection until he was done, so Eva decided to focus her anxious energy on him; tracing the wrinkles in the collar of his shirt with her eyes, trying to count his eyelashes that batted slowly, the glitter and pale red color already on his own face painted on in such a way that so classically Remington. It wasn't too much, and it wasn't too little.

"Close your eyes," she did everything he told her to do; close her eyes, turn her face, suck in her cheeks, etc. His fingers were cold as he held her in place, dusting the brush over her eyelids with slow precision.

"How's it look?" she asked quietly, trying to look at her own reflection peripherally but only getting a glimpse of her hair.

"Very beautiful," he smiled, grabbing his own tube of liquid liner and giving it a quick shake, "I should use you to model more looks for me,"

"You mean like your makeup guinea pig?" she asked.

"I wouldn't call you a 'guinea pig'," he chuckled, "More like my little muse... in more ways than just one," he kissed the tip of her nose, instructing her to close her eyes and remain absolutely still again before he applied the cold black liquid to her eyes. Eva bit the inside of her lip, trying not to fidget at the chilled sensation running over the roots of her eyelashes.

"Are you done?" she asked when he finished applying the mascara.

"Almoooosst..." he drawled, brushing his favorite highlight onto her cheeks briefly, "There. Now we're done,"

"So I can look now?"

"Go ahead," he urged, standing back so she could hop off the sink.

Eva held her breath as she saw herself in the mirror, her hair held back behind her ears to show off the beautiful, glittering glow dusting her face. She looked beautiful, but natural, with white and rose eyeshadow complimenting the matte peach color painted on her lips. She was so cool, so pretty, with her makeover pushing her natural beauty to that extra mile. Remington stood just behind her, proud of himself for his work, yet teetering on uncertainty when she didn't say anything.

"... How is it?" he asked.

She smiled at him through the mirror, bouncing up on her heels, "I look so cool!" and she took his hands and wrapped them around her smaller body, pushing her back to his chest, "We look so cool,"

"Yes, we do," he grinned, briefly biting the lobe of her ear, "So you like it?"

"I love it!"

"Can I do your makeup more often?"

"Absolutely," she turned in his arms and went to give him a kiss, but he stopped her briefly when he remembered one important tool.

"Wait a minute," he grabbed a little black spray bottle and held it in front of her face, "Close your eyes," he instructed, spritzing a cool liquid over her face. It smelled sweet, like fruit and sugar.

"What is that?" she asked.

"Setting spray, so you won't smudge," he replied, pulling her back into her arms with a lovestruck grin, "And now I can do this without the guilt," and he kissed her gently.

[starkerintheparker]

starker reclist - AUs

Hey guys! Welcome to the second part of my personal Starker reclist, dedicated to AUs. Last week I posted my canon-based recs, you can find them here.

I tried to incorporate as many tropes as I could, hoping everyone will find something special within their interests. There are a few a/b/o and underage fics, all properly tagged in case anyone wishes to avoid them. I also tried to highlight soulmate AUs because I reckon it’s a somewhat popular trope. Enjoy! ❤️

Last updated: April 25th, 2020. All new fics added will be marked with ***

• 007 AU by @darker-soft-starker (T, 4k, completed)

Summary: Undercover and bored at an art auction, Tony finds entertainment in Peter Parker.

Review: Look, I’m a simple woman. Daniel Craig has owned my ass ever since Casino Royale and I was reading 00Q and Hartwin before I even shipped Starker. Point is, I like spy movies, ok?! So naturally I couldn’t leave this fic out of my reclist. I you need further incentive, consider this quote: “What, a little late night espionage not romantic enough for you?” Peter retorts, whipping a pistol out from his jacket and aiming it at Tony’s chest.

• 3 Times I Told You I Loved You & 1 Time You Said It Back by @starkeristheendgame (E) background Peter/Steve, Peter/Bucky, Peter/Scott

Summary: Peter Parker confesses his love to Tony Stark three times. Once at ten, once at fifteen and once at twenty. Finally convinced that Tony will never love him back, Peter ventures out into a different path, desperate to find the love he seeks from someone else. But you know what they say about star-crossed lovers.

Review: This lovely fic holds a very special place in my heart. I’m so invested I decided to wait until it’s finished so I can read it all in one sitting. Peter’s longing and heartbreak hurt my poor soul but I trust Jensen to give me that promised Starker endgame - I know it will be glorious when it finally comes.

• A Night on the Town by @scarletmanuka1 (G, 2.3k, completed)

Summary: Nightclub AU. Years after the events of Endgame, Tony has hit rock bottom. The Snap left him crippled, Pepper has abandoned him and has taken Morgan with her, and he's feeling old and lonely. Peter arranges a night out at the nightclub that he works at to try and cheer Tony up.

Review: I love get together fics, especially if it involves oblivious!Tony getting his shit together and going after his man. Seeing him bitter and broken after Thanos was hard, but special kudos to IronBros moments because that friendship is true goals!

• Age of Adeline by @starkerforlife6969 (completed) background Harley/Peter, Bucky/Peter, Wade/Peter

Review: I’d never in a million years think about this movie as a Starker AU but gosh, this is everything I needed in my life and it completely devastated me but I loved every minute of it. As a devoted monoshipper, I was surprised to realize that I got emotionally involved with all pairings, even more so with Starker, which totally paid off. Gorgeous, powerful and heartfelt. God bless SFL.

• assume makes ass for u and me by @pretty-well-funded (M, 1.6k, completed) tw underage

Summary: In Tony’s defense, he was sure the kid was a rent boy.

Review: This 1.6k fic caught me completely off guard and now I’m crying because I need MORE. I love the premise, the dialogue is criminally good, their voices are amazing and I can’t get enough of cheeky!Peter charming Tony with his wit and filthy mind.  

• Bamf!secretary Peter by @starkerforlife6969 (M, completed)

Review: Who could ever resist some corporate espionage drama with bamf!Peter leaving Tony speechless and horny? Not me. I’d read more 30k of this verse because competent, sassy Peter Parker is such a kink, omg.

• Biker!Tony by @starkerforlife6969 (T, completed) Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Review: Same age AUs are not usually my thing but I can’t resist cute high school sweethearts written by this fandom goddess. Plus, protective!Tony calling Peter “doll” does things to my heart - and Peter’s.

• Breaking Character by @cagestark (E, 8.3k, completed)

Summary: Tony Stark, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, and spy for SHIELD. Working with another SHIELD spy, the infamous Spider, he will take down an infamous human trafficking ring in New York. But the act they have to put on will demand more from Tony than he ever thought he'd have to give. Not that he minds.

Review: The spy trope seriously needs more fic like this one, because I’ll have bamf!Peter lying back to save his country while Tony freaks out any day. Cage hits the perfect balance between plot building, fantastic sexual tension, clever dialogue and the hottest smut sequence. What a ride! (Pun intended).  

• Curiosity Killed the Cat by @areluctantsblog (T, 1.5k, completed)

Summary: Peter has been modelling in an art school for years. He's used to strangers' eyes roaming his body - clothed or naked - and he knows that it's not him they are looking at. Not him who they are interested in. He's just a model, a tool for their work. And for a long time he doesn't notice the one pair of eyes that, despite seeing him but rarely, is looking right at him.

Review: Very soft and atmospheric, this fic left me in a bit of a daze and it took me a while to realize it was over. Great writing will do that to you.

• Detective!Tony, Graffiti Artist!Peter by @starkerforlife6969 (M, completed)

Review: Oh don’t mind me, just appreciating this author’s talent at writing from the filthiest smut to the softest “Tony saves Peter in all ways that matter” like this ficlet. We stan.

• Eat at Pete’s by feyrelay + glorious art by @peachbabypie (E)

Summary: Peter gives him an unimpressed look, “If you didn’t do your work, then you wouldn’t be able to earn my time though, would you?” Pfft. “Kid, I have more money than god. I can splurge on your delicious pancakes and attention, trust me,” Tony informs him loftily. Peter smiles that wicked, crooked little smile that's just for him. It's not even and perfect like his the-customer-is-always-right one that's more frequently on offer. “I didn’t say you couldn’t afford it. I said you wouldn’t have earned it.”

Review: How can we ever say no to dom!Peter putting Tony in his place and hopefully on his dick + Tony loving every second of it?? Their dynamics are fantastic and that TASTY COUNTER DIALOGUE KILLS ME. EVERY TIME. Check it out and come scream with me: sub!Tony rights :D

• Fire and Ice by LeafyGreenQueen773 (M, 3k, completed) Soulmate AU

Summary: AU where when someone writes on his or her skin, the same thing shows up on their soulmate in the same place as a Mark that fades away in a few hours.

Review: This was the first Starker soulmate fic I’ve read and it made my heart ache so soft and good. Lovely and bittersweet, quiet and painfully honest. 

• Genius, Acrobat, Playboy, Philanthropist by @scarletmanuka1 (E, 28k, completed)

Summary: After Peter's aeriel acrobatics partner, Adrian Toomes is fired from The Avengers Circus Troupe for theft, he is shocked to discover that his replacement is non other than legendary performer, Tony Stark - the man that Peter had hero worshipped since he first learned how to tumble. 

Review: After reading this fic I realized I need more Circus AUs in my life. I could read jealous idiots falling in love while doing beautiful acrobatics for the rest of my days. Original plot, nice character development and I really appreciated how the author inserted little canon things here and there. 

• Happy to Disappoint by @deaded-blush (M, 60k, completed) tw underage, domestic violence

Summary: Adrian Toomes is in quite deep with notorious mob boss Tony Stark. But when Tony comes to collect the debt owed, he's surprised to discover Toomes has an adoptive son. The chance meeting changes the direction of both their lives...

Review: Hands down one of the best Mafia!AUs I’ve ever seen. Read it all in one sitting and by the end I was SHOOKETH and utterly obsessed with this story. Nothing about it is okay so brace yourself for whump!Peter and lots of h/c. Bonus points for an incredibly satisfying ending that will make you gasp out loud.

• Hey Baby, Slip between my Beta-Pleats and get to know my Alpha-Helix? by @starkerforlife6969 and @darker-soft-starker (E, 37k, completed) A/B/O

Summary: Even though Tony can't tell the difference between Manolo Blahnik and Jimmy Choo, Peter really has no other choice. His heat is around the corner, so even though he loathes the party-going, booze drinking, smug playboy know-it-all that is Tony Stark. He'll just have to do.       

Review: I can’t believe life went on as we know it (or did it??) after these two geniuses wrote together. This is the Starker version of “enemies to lovers” we all wanted and deserve, where spoiled-bratty-posh princess Peter finds the perfect balance for his chaotic energy in goofy-unapologetic-charming playboy Tony. Their falling in love is just so tender, so genuine and so good, it’s impossible not to cheer for these two sweethearts through this delightful, carefully crafted story.

• If you let me by @css1992 (E, 12k, completed)

Summary: Peter had tried dating younger guys, but it just didn’t do it for him. They were often too eager, too fast, too rough. Just too young, in general. Not that older men couldn’t be too much, too, Peter learned it the hard way. The man looking back at him from across the room seemed like a good one. He knew he shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, but he was gorgeous. Possibly the most handsome man Peter had ever seen in his short life.

Review: I remember the first time I read this fic it hit me in such a powerful way I cried a bit and was too overwhelmed to do words and tell the author just how much I loved it. But I never forgot this fic or the way it made me feel. It’s so evocative, so sexy, so raw, so heartbreaking, so sweet and so gentle. Great atmosphere, even greater characterization and some of the hottest smut I’ve ever read. Treat yourself and check this out right now.    

• I’ll be Home by @starkerforlife6969 (M, completed) A/B/O

Summary: The story starts when Soldier Tony comes home for a few days, and is introduced to the love of his life.

Review: Will I ever stop reccing SFL’s works? Maybe, but today is not the day. This gorgeous, breathtaking fic attacked me in my own house during Christmas day and made me cry like a baby. I’m a sucker for reunion stories - the longing, the heartbreak, the power of endurance. This fic reminded me that no matter how long or difficult the journey, love will always find a way.

• Little Spider by @stfustucky (iwillpaintasongforlou) (E, 5k, completed)

Summary: Peter Parker is one of the country's best hitmen, known in the underworld as the Little Spider. He spends his days in the lap of luxury with his billionaire fiance Tony Stark, and his nights doing dirty work for various shady characters. Life is good, right up until someone puts out a hit on Tony and wants Peter to pull the trigger. It... might be time for them to have a talk.

Review: Omg this fic was so deliciously good in a totally surprising and sexy way. Bamf!Peter took my breath away with the perfect balance between his two personas. Tony getting off on that sheer power and confidence is a BIG MOOD and my second favorite thing in this fic. The first being the badass power couple they make. 

• love somebody like you (E) by @intoxicatelou

Summary: five times Tony was Peter’s roommate and one time he was his soulmate instead.

Review: Who doesn’t love some forced proximity mixed with the unbeatable soulmate trope? This plot is the hottest take and my heart cannot handle young!Tony with his brilliant mind and sassy charm protecting and flirting with Peter, unfff feels everywhere *cries in Starker*

• Love Thy Neighbour by @darker-soft-starker (T, 2.3k, completed)

Summary: Tony's new neighbour is kinda weird.

Review: I know I keep saying that same age!AUs are not really my thing but I’m the softest bitch for feel-good, cozy domesticity, and I love how this charming story shows that ordinary life become magical when shared with someone special. I could babble all night about how eccentric and confident Peter seduces our man of science that for once has absolutely no idea of what’s going on - but you really should see it for yourself right now :)

• Mafia Boss!Tony Break Up Make Up by @starkerforlife6969 (E, completed)

Review: Man, this fic was so rude to my heart. The heartbreak, the rough sex, the guilt, the hopeful make up, the gorgeous ending. My body literally cannot take the stress, why are Mafia AUs so doomed and beautiful and more importantly, why is SFL so good at writing them???

• Microcosm Series by @bloomblood (M, 32k) tw underage

Summary: Tony and Peter become each other’s heroes after the Snap, saving themselves before they offer aid back to the world.

Review: I haven’t read many post-apocalyptic fics but this series’s raw atmosphere sucked me in. I adore the quiet intimacy, the slow and tentative healing, and all the silent and complex emotions underneath apparent simplicity. Big aesthetic mood, just as its lovely author. 

• Musechaser by @nightskygardenia (M, 10.5k, completed)

Summary: Eighteen year old art student Peter Parker is desperately searching for his muse, someone who can bring his creative skills to the next level through inspiration. Lucky for him, his next class just so happens to feature a gorgeous model by the name of Tony Stark, a man Peter's convinced is his muse, to the point of staying after class to ask for private modeling sessions.

Review: Another big aesthetic mood, this fic paints a gorgeous imagery. I love the setting, the slow pace and the building anticipation until the sexual tension finally breaks. Peter is adorable and Tony exudes confidence; their voices are spot on and their chemistry is palpable and intense.  

• My Best Friend’s Dad by @darker-soft-starker (M, 17.6k, completed)

Summary: Peter is home for the summer, back from his first year away at college. Having stayed over at Harley's house every weekend since they were fourteen, he never used to think much of his friend’s dad. A few years worth of college experience has Peter noticing Tony in a different way. This time, Tony notices him back.

Review: Turns out that Tony Stark being a dad and a daddy is too much for my body. I worship this fic. I wanna get married to it and have its babies. No words will ever make it justice *sobs* no but seriously, secret relationship is a perfect Starker trope and this one will take you to the edge of your seat until the very end. A+ characterization, lovely build up, infuriating cliffhangers and the wholesome happy ending we all deserve. This is the kind of fic that leaves you a bit depressed once it’s over, because you suddenly realize you’ll never read it for the first time ever again. So get to it and make sure to enjoy every second!

• One Call Away by @readysetstarker (E)

Summary: Tony didn’t need the phone sex gig. He was more than well off, his own sex life was in great shape, but damn, there was just something about listening to someone else get off to his voice. 

Review: Omg who could ever resist sex hotline + daddy kink + identity porn? Dev is coming after our own hearts and bodies with this hot combo. I love the balance between their cute chemistry and the hot phone sex, plus the identity porn is deliciously fun. I was so happy to know this fic is getting longer than the author had previously anticipated because I’m definitely not ready to let it go.

• Open Road by @starkerflowers (E, 2.5k, completed)

Summary: It’s not love, but it’s good. TW: implied abuse (not between Tony/Peter); bruises/violence; panic attack. 

Review: This refreshing not-quite-a-love-story will capture your heart, make it hurt, make it ache, make it hope and finally, make it heal. This fic is so gorgeously written I honestly cannot rec it enough. Yes, it’s dark and angsty, but it’s also gentle, hopeful and deeply evocative.  

• Panty Raid by @starkerforlife6969 (M, completed) A/B/O

Summary:  Imagine Tony being forced to do a panty raid as an initiation for his fraternity. So Tony, keeping up his playboy appearances, sneaks into the omega dorms. And he sees sweet innocent Peter who is so alarmed by the alphas raiding their dorm Tony can’t help but comfort him.

Review: Unf this fic is just too charming and cute, my heart cannot take it. Frat stories are so fun they make me forget my preference for age gaps and realize I could read more 50k of protective young!Tony any day, please and thank

• Pete’s Eats by @darker-soft-starker (T, 9.3k, completed)

Summary: Peter has a YouTube channel where he just drinks wine and teaches people how to cook things if they live in a mediocre apartment. While cooking and drinking he just talks about stuff like memes and school and, most importantly, his undying thirst for Tony Stark.

Review: This is legit the funniest shit I’ve ever read, everybody else can go home. I was already sold on Peter being a relatable thirsty dork, but Tony’s A+++ characterization (for a moment I thought it was RDJ on the big screen) and the identity porn side trope killed me for good. And what a way to go. I’m an angst hoe but I could read this forever and would be okay with it. 

• pondus, pondera by spqr (M, 9.3k, completed) underage prostitution but not between P/T

Summary: Peter sells his virginity for $5,000 when he’s fifteen.

Review: Ugh I’m so weak for the angsty hooker trope, I just love the potential to simultaneously explore whump, mutual pining and gentle recovery. Trust spqr to deliver it all with a carefully crafted slow burn, god-tier characterization and a heartfelt and satisfying get together. This fic is a gem.

• Powerful by @cagestark (E, 4.6k, completed) SIM!Tony

Summary: After finding out about Peter's abusive ex, Tony privately vows revenge.

Review: This fic took my breath away and made me realize that dark!Tony with a soft spot for Peter is everything I need in my life. Precious Peter being empowered by a viciously protective Tony is now my absolute jam, and it was fascinating to see see their dynamics mutually feeding each other’s nature. This fic is gorgeous, sexy and liberating. 

***Red Light District series by @starker-stories (17k, ongoing)

Summary: Everyone knows that Tony Stark is a playboy who has dozens of women passing through his life and through his bed. What everyone doesn't know is that Tony Stark is deeply closeted, longing for something he can't ever have -- a life and a love with another man.

Review: I’m completely in love with this series and not only because it explores the good old hooker trope which I’m very partial to. It’s so well written and atmospheric, if a tad bittersweet and heart-wrenching. Great narrative tension, Tony and Peter’s chemistry is insane, their voices and dialogue are amazing and the smut is looong and scorching hot *chef’s kiss* 

• Samadhi by @starkercrossedlovers (E, completed)

Summay: Tony goes to yoga to try and deal with his anxiety and ends up falling for the instructor, one Peter Parker.

Review: Okay so yoga fics are among my guilty pleasures and I can’t get enough of feel-good fics like this one. Peter’s such a sweetheart, so thoughtful and amazing with Tony. I love it when they take care of each other and find solace together, this fic made me soft :’)

• Single dad baker!Peter and lawyer!Tony by @starkerforlife6969 (G, completed)

Review: I’m not usually a fluff girl but this fic is just too wholesome to go by unnoticed. Nothing hits my soft side harder than a cynical character reaching that turning point that makes them start to believe in love. Fuck yes, YOU SHOW THAT MAN SOME HAPPILY EVER AFTER PETE

• Soft Kitty by @ko-fiandfanfiction (E, 33k, completed)

Summary: Peter wasn’t wearing something Tony would call normal, not that there was anything inherently wrong with what he was wearing or anything. It just struck him as…different. To put it plainly. Tony is not sure what to make of this new development.

Review: For those of you who love some occasional feminization, this is the perfect treat. Soft, sexy and sweet, it combines top guilty, pining Tony with oblivious idiots in love, two of my favorite tropes. Amazing slow burn with glorious sexual tension, infuriating dancing around each other and a very satisfying get together. Bonus points for including the “Avengers living together in the Tower” trope, this is the 2012 team building fic we deserved.

• Solitaire by @darker-soft-starker (M, 29k, completed)

Summary: After a traumatic experience, Tony loses his marriage and his business empire in one fell swoop. At rock bottom, it takes real change to pick up the pieces, to dig himself out of the funk he's been living in. It's not pretty. Along the path of healing Tony meets a bright young man, Peter Parker, who makes the entire journey worth it.

Review: Oh man, this was a tough ride on the soul. Few things hurt me like reading whump!Tony but his healing journey is so beautiful it’s all worth it. Top notch characterization, amazing dialogue, FEELS EVERYWHERE, and a gorgeous portrayal of loneliness, friendship, hope and love.  

• Someone Who Makes you Happy by tuesday (T, 6k, completed) Soulmate AU

Summary: Peter was born with several marks already marring his skin, including an interlocking AES over his heart. A scar-sharing soulmate AU.

Review: This fic is absolutely stunning and it makes my heart ache in all the right places. Great worldbuilding (I LOVE the scarring concept, so unique and fitting to these characters), A+++ Tony characterization (the wit and the self-hate are so spot on I could weep) and a journey full of longing, until they finally get to be on the same page. 

• Splice by Mezzymet (E, 35k, completed) A/B/O

Summary: "He's not...." The doctors polite nature and disposition hadn't been able to mask the odd tone of his voice, like he had been reading someone's death certificate. Only Peter hadn't been on his death bed. "Peter isn't like the other kids.

Review: I keep coming back to this story because it’s such a fascinating and unique take on this trope. Very well thought and put together - the world building is fantastic, the sex sequences are breathtaking, and Tony’s gentle thoughtfulness makes me wanna cry.   

• Stopover by @cagestark (E, 10k, completed)

Summary: A stopover is just a break in a journey. Tony is on the run from the organization he used to kill for, and when he stopped for gas and coffee in the small town of Stopover, IL, he had no plans to leave with anything more.

Review: *sigh* this is the mob boss!Tony fic I’ve waited for all my life. Even more impressive than the delicious smut checking all my kink boxes was the phenomenal build up, the overall urgent atmosphere that surrounds those “on the run”, combined with the gentle wonder of stealing a moment in time to find solace in the most unlikely place. Breathtakingly moving. 

• Student Body President Election by @starkerforlife6969 (T, completed)

Summary: Tony and Peter are competing for Student Body President and a smear campaign takes things a little too far.

Review: GIMME ENEMIES TO LOVERS AND ALL THE HIGH SCHOOL DRAMA. This ficlet is so fun and adorable it will make your heart smile. Great plot idea and the usual bonus points for protective!Tony being a sweetheart. Will have more 30k, pls and thank.

• Such a Softer Sin by @css1992 (E, 18k, completed) background Peter/Norman

Summary: Tony is a self-made man. Peter is a sugar baby – someone else’s sugar baby.

Review: Another fantastic slow burn that hit me hard in the feels. I love it when fics explore the characters’ personal struggles before they get together, and while the Peter!whump destroyed my heart, Tony’s parallel journey of growth took my breath away. css1992’s talent took the good old sugar baby trope to a whole new epic level. 

• Summer Daze by @darker-soft-starker (NR, 4.3k, completed)

Summary: Starker no-powers au where Peter watches construction worker Tony from his bedroom window as the older man works across the street.

Review: Ahh yes, the classic “food as metaphor for love” trope, my absolute jam. This fic is so adorable and endearing, pining!Peter in his wooing mission makes my heart ache and the sweet anticipation is so good. There’s something about this fic that gives me nostalgia; it’s as soft and warm as a summer breeze.

• Tamed by @cagestark (E, 8.3k, completed)

Summary: Tony Stark, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, and spy for SHIELD. Working with another SHIELD spy, the infamous Spider, he will take down an infamous human trafficking ring in New York. But the act they have to put on will demand more from Tony than he ever thought he'd have to give. Not that he minds.

Review: It’s no wonder this is Cage’s most beloved fic. Bad boy!Tony being all soft for Peter is everything we deserve, not to mention a mesmerizing (and HOT AF) first time together. This fic shows how rich and captivating Cage’s writing is - she’s able to transform that old basic trope into something unique and heartfelt. If you need one more reason to read this, please consider: best first bj ever :)    

• Teacher!Tony wrong number by @areluctantsblog (T) tw underage

Summary: Peter’s using a replacement phone and mistypes Ned’s number asking for help on a physics problem.

Review: I have such a soft spot for this fic! It was one of the first AUs I’ve ever read and I’m completely in love with their dynamics. Peter’s underage but this fic is carefully written and pretty tame, so I’d rec it to anyone looking for the good old “they probably shouldn’t, but then again nothing’s happening” trope.  

• The Bleedover Effect by tuesday (T, 11k, completed) Soulmate AU

Summary: The first time Tony got punched in the face by nobody there, he had a lot of very complicated feelings about it that mostly boiled down to, "I deserve this." A pain-sharing soulmate AU.

Review: Tuesday truly is the queen of soulmate AUs, we have no other choice but STAN. First of all, I adore the concept here - being such a sucker for whump, this could easily become my favorite soulmate trope. As usual, her Tony voice is perfect and his devotion to Peter hits my fragile heart every time. Kudos for the soft and hopeful ending. The series has been discontinued but the sequels are very much worth the read, if you’re up for it :)

• The Catfish Chronicles by @stfustucky (iwillpaintasongforlou) (E, 32k, completed)

Summary: Peter creates a fake profile under the name “Benjamin” trying to catch his scumbag boyfriend cheating. Tony creates a Tinder profile for "Anthony" looking for love late in life. Funny how two geniuses who fight side by side every day can only manage to fall in love after they've accidentally catfished each other. This is... gonna get awkward.

Review: My identity porn thirst might be showing but who cares, I want these two idiots pining after each other in every possible way. This was such a fun and exciting ride! The suspense had me legit freaking out and their get together was lovely and wholesome. I particularly adored how thoughtful and sweet Tony was dealing with Peter’s insecurities, that was handled really well. A treat!

• The Concept of Domesticity by @peters-tofu (E) mpreg

Summary: Tony has accomplished nearly everything he's set out to do, now he wants something different. A family of his own? Sounds easy enough. But he's far too impatient for a relationship, so surrogacy it is. Meanwhile, twenty-two year old college student Peter Parker has just volunteered to be a bearer at an agency.

Review: Can’t say I’m a big fan of this trope but since every rule has its exception, here it is! The only Starker mpreg I’ve ever read is so so good and adorable I can’t help smiling every time I think about it. I just love their dynamics, the soft domesticity, the cute bantering, and the fact that Peter has one baby daddy all wrapped around his little finger but what else is new ;)

***The Date by Neuropsyche (E, 33k, completed)

Summary: Tony has a high society gala and he needs a date.

Review: My favorite fake dating AU so far, this fic is so sweet and wholesome. Confident!Peter is my jam and it was amazing to see their sassy bantering evolving into genuine affection towards each other, not to mention the delicious hot smut with dom!Tony :D 

• The Final Heist by @starkerforlife6969 (G, 10k, completed)

Summary: Tony’s only got one more heist. He does this, he can be retired on an island in the Mediterranean in a month. All he needs is a world-class art forger. (White Collar inspired)

Review: Honestly, the amount of times I’ve mentioned SFL in this list is getting embarrassing. I must have done something really good in another life to get such a talented author writing something inspired by one of my favorite TV shows. I feel like this fic was personally crafted for me; it’s original, romantic, sexy, fun, clever and so very atmospheric. I’m a lucky hoe. 

• The Heart Benefits of Exercise by @areluctantsblog (E, 14k, completed)

Summary: Personal Trainer Tony and Gym Newbie Peter. Peter can hardly keep it together watching Tony demonstrate different exercises and lift weights. Tony is very much aware of the effect he has on his trainee, and after a session, Peter begs to be shown a whole different array of exercises.

Review: This fic was a lovely surprise, very relatable and entertaining. Love myself an adorable Peter thirsting over Tony (can’t really judge lol), especially if it comes with a good amount of pining and hot, kinky smut :D

• Tipping the Scale by JayPendragon (E, 119k, completed)

Summary: Peter has a rhythm. A system. All runs like a well-oiled machine, engineering pun intended. Every wheel of his life is churning perfectly. He doesn’t expect Tony Stark of all people to throw a wrench in it.

Review: Hooker!AUs are my kryptonite, I’m so here for the “fuck first, talk later” and the general pining + misunderstandings + h/c combo this trope provides. This amazing longfic delivers it all with a well-paced, delicious slow burn told from Peter’s POV, which is always a delight to read and makes you fall even more in love with him. If you also enjoy this trope you’re in for a treat!

•  To Catch a Spider by Thekeyandquill (E)

Summary: After the war, Peter Parker left his career as a spy behind to live a simple life in the south of France. But when someone frames him for the theft of plans for a new weapon, he must re-enter his old life and get close to the real thief's likely next target - one Tony Stark. A To Catch a Thief AU.

Review: TKAQ is so skilled their writing should be experienced like fine wine. Amazing research, top notch world building and characterization, and the loveliest atmosphere that makes you feel like you’re inside a movie. Clever, organic dialogue and a sexual tension so palpable you can almost taste it. This is a gem. Make sure to check their other works.

•  Two White, Two Black, One Pink by @starkerforlife6969 (E) poly fic: Peter/Tony, Peter/Steve, Peter/Bucky, Peter/Strange Summary: Peter has three (maybe one day: four) men in his life who mean the world to him. Review: Ugh, this fic is pure bliss. It has legit ruined me for any and all other poly fics. Words just cannot describe how gorgeous, poetic and unique SFL’s writing is, or how deeply it has affected me. So if you enjoy Mafia AUs, poly fics and soft-but-also-bamf!Peter taking care of Tony AND being taken care of by the men he loves, give this a chance and experience transcending storytelling. 

•  Uranium Heart by spqr (M, 11k, completed) Soulmate AU Summary: It’s probably better, Peter thinks, that he doesn’t know who his soulmate is. He wouldn’t want to lie to them about Spider-Man, but he doesn’t think he’d be able to tell them the truth, either.

Review: Be still my heart. This is such a gorgeous fic! Not only it combines two major tropes in a coherent 11k story, but I also appreciate how spqr explores these characters and their dynamics in a very unique and realistic way. I strongly recommend checking their other works, especially Landslide. 

•  Waiting Game by @cagestark (E, 6k, completed)

Summary: Peter hasn't seen Tony in fifteen years. Not since he had their hasty marriage annulled, graduated college, and moved across the country. Their twenty year high school reunion will find them reunited. They've both changed, but one thing hasn’t. Hint: it's their feelings for each other.

Review: This fic literally made my heart BURST WITH FEELS: the whole build up and anticipation, the slow disclosure of their past, the first uncertain moments of their reunion. I also appreciate the powerful and moving message underneath it all, that true healing comes after we overcome our demons at our own pace. A masterpiece.

•  Wooing Peter Parker by Neuropsyche (E, 62.5k, completed)

Summary: Tony and Rhodey dodge the press and sneak into the library where they meet Peter Parker - who immediately catches Tony's eye. But Peter isn't a one and done kind of guy and Tony's going to have to work for what he wants this time.

Review: This is the kind of fic that warms you all over and makes you smile non stop. It has so many elements I love in fic: cute flirting, clever banter, hot sex, soft domesticity, boys being reasonable and talking their problems out for a change. If you’re looking for something light, sweet and honest, this series is a must read!

[muzaktomyears]

ultimate beatlemaniac tag game

So, I found this somewhere on tumblr, and it’s super old, and I haven’t been tagged in it, but I thought it would be a good intro-ish thing, if anyone wants that for some reason (warning: some of these these answers get long, and again, please check my pinned post):

How long have you been a fan?:

Since I can remember listening to music. My parents are children/teenagers of the ‘60s (my mum saw The Beatles in concert in ’64, with the stress on the ‘saw’ because yes, she heard nothing but screaming) and I fully absorbed and internalised their music taste as a child, and I still have pretty much the same taste now (though I did eventually manage to broaden out into later stuff and even some modern stuff omg get me). So, I was a general fan since forever, just of the sound, but when I was about 7? 8? my best friend in primary school was a mega fan and she got me to roleplay The Beatles in the playground with her during break. I’m really not surprised that other people didn’t talk to us much lmao… Anyway, it was essentially a John&Paul roleplay (with George as their child, I think?? oh what a dynamic), and John was her fave so I was Paul. This continued when I went on holiday that year to France and we wrote postcards to each other from the POV of John and Paul. This was waaay before any of us knew what fanfiction was, and it was mid-‘90s, so largely pre-internet, which is hilarious, looking back at it. So, in ways it is inevitable that I would end up here. But I’d never been in the livejournal/tumblr fandom, really. I would read a few fics, years ago, but I’d never written anything, and certainly not published it. And then, a month or so ago, I just randomly deep-dived and this is what happened.

Favorite Beatle:

Oh no. THE QUESTION. They have all been my favourite, over the years. I started with Ringo because I had a book on people who were born in July (my birth month) that he was in, so I felt a connection lmao. I obviously went through a teenage John stan phase, like most people do, but then my sister is still the worst kind of John stan and I reacted to that and started liking Paul just to be different. And then I was like, a depressed socially-anxious 20-year-old, so George was very comforting. Ultimately, I don’t have a favourite, as they are all my favourite, at different times and in different ways, and I know that’s a shit non-answer but it’s true. I do have special soft spots for Ringo & Paul though, because my dad is so anti-them and pro the others (hence my almost total ignorance of their post-Beatles music career, which I am rapidly rectifying), so I spend a lot of time defending them (though irl, with friends, I spend most of my time taking the piss out of Paul in particular because he deserves it <3). But really, they’re all amazing and terrible.

Favorite era for music:

THESE QUESTIONS ARE IMPOSSIBLE, god. Again, I’ve gone through phases. As a child, I loved the Help! era a lot, and then I moved on to Sgt. Pepper and later stuff. I honestly like it all. At the moment I’m very into the early-to-mid stuff, again mainly because I feel it often gets neglected, at least among people who I talk to. (When we went as a family to see The Bootleg Beatles, my sister confessed she doesn’t much like the early stuff.) But I LOVE IT ALL, because ultimately I have no taste esp re: music and will like anything, given time and exposure.

Favorite era for lewks:

Yeah, I shouldn’t be asked ‘favourite’ questions tbh, because again my gut reaction is to say ‘every era’. Fuck. I do like the late ’66 onwards psychedelia stuff the most I think… it is very pretty. I have a special appreciation for the Teddy boy era at the moment though because I wasn’t all that aware of it before I became reacquainted and it’s largely what I’m writing atm.

Favorite song:

OH MY GOD. Umm. My parents asked me recently which one I’d take on Desert Island Discs, and I think I came up with ‘All You Need Is Love’. Which I do like a lot. Or, ‘A Day in the Life’, for its mix of Lennon & McCartney.

Favorite album:

omg I’m so glad this is the last ‘favourite’ question!! Sorry. Uh… Sgt. Pepper. The very first album I ever owned (on CD), at age 8, because I’m supercool and obviously was very popular at school.

Unpopular/Controversial Beatles opinion:

lmao I’m not sure if I have a truly unpopular one, I’ve seen so many random opinions in my time. Maybe that I’ve listened to the Decca audition tape and I truly don’t get what’s so off about Pete Best’s drumming? I think it sounds fine. I am a musical idiot who tried for years as a child to learn guitar and couldn't (classical Spanish, not normal/cool, so I don't even really know how chord is formed tbh).

A song everyone loves but you dislike:

‘Eleanor Rigby’. There is a reason for this – I watched the Yellow Submarine film so much as a child and the animation sequence for this song triggered the fuck out of me for some reason, it’s so effing creepy! So, I couldn’t listen to the song for literally 15 years. I used to walk out of shops if it came on. I’ve since managed to listen to it and not die, and it is a good song, there’s nothing wrong with it, it just sets off my existential angst like nothing else on earth! WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE ALONE. Fuck you, Paul, you caused my depression and my anxiety both.

A song everyone dislikes but you love:

I mean I don’t think people truly dislike it, they just dismiss it, but ‘Octopus’s Garden’. It was my fave as a child, and I remember telling my dad that I loved The Beatles because they didn’t just sing about boring things like love all the time but also fun things like octopuses. lmao. And now I’m sat here crying over all their love songs, especially the ones written to each other. Child me was superior.

Your fantasy involving The Beatles:

Oh god I don’t want to meet them. I want to be a literal fly on the wall when they’re all stuck in a hotel bathroom together because the whole world wants to talk to them, but they only want to talk to each other. That would be perfect.

Tell us about the moment you knew you were a fan:

Probably age 8 when my mum (who, as mentioned above, saw them in concert) asked whether every conversation I had had to involve them and could we please talk about something else, hahahaha. Cannot believe she identified a hyperfixation before modern fandom even existed.

Did you ever have a genuine ‘The Beatles suck!’ phase before becoming a fan?:

Absolutely not. I totally swallowed the Kool Aid force-fed to me lmao. I’ve had, like, ‘I don’t like him as much as him’ or whatever phases, but I have now reached a happy equilibrium. They’re all awful. <3

Favorite Beatles book:

I have literally never read one. I don’t think? I have a loooooong list of bookmarked Amazon pages for a few months from now when I should be free for a bit and can spend ridiculous amounts on them. I will become that meme asking for help feeding my family. The first one I'm buying is that 'The Day John Met Paul' book because I need that stupid level of detail in my life and the bits I've seen of it are shippier and more purple prose than any fanfic.

Thoughts on the old generation of fans:

Ahhhh. I mean, they are my main experience of the fandom, or were until like a month ago. They have their faults, definitely, and a lot of their views need massive reassessment, but they’re so passionate and have done so much work and are so happy to teach and share, generally. Boomer men in particular are annoying, yes, and I vehemently disagree with most of my dad’s opinions, which are like the boomeriest opinions ever, but I also wouldn’t be here without him, so. (Also, old generation Dylan fans can be so much worse. I'm on a Dylan Facebook group and hahahahaha no.)

If Hollywood were to make a high budget Beatles biopic, what is one thing you desperately hope they include?:

This is one of my nightmares. Um. Probably the Bob Dylan cannabis incident? Because Bob is my one true love and I need it, and also would be a good counterpoint to the brief scene in I’m Not There. Otherwise, pls include Ringo’s sad backstory! Why did I not know of it until a month ago??

Do you read/write fanfic?:

Not in the past (though I read some, occasionally), but yes, now I read and write it. That is all I do now. That is my life. And sometimes I sleep.

Are you the only one in your family/friend group to enjoy them?:

Not in my family, we all do, but have different opinions that we argue about. (My mum was obvs a Paul fan (who wasn’t?) and wanted to call me Paul before I was born… lol.) Friend group, no, most people are at least casual fans (who I start talking to and then get disappointed that they’ve never heard of The Cavern Club or something), though a very few of my friends are all ‘I hate The Beatles and have never heard a single song’ which is hilarious. For some reason they don’t annoy me as anti-Dylan people, who I always try to convert.

Are you a shipper?:

I ship everything ever. Mainly John/Paul, obviously, which is what I’ve written so far, but I will read anything, pretty much, and will be convinced by it. When I was writing the Bob & George fic, I thought, do I ship George with Paul? Do I really think George had an (un)requited(?) crush on Paul? And I thought no, probably not, but I’ve since reassessed and realised that yes, I do, and I have a further one planned that will sort-of address that. I do also love George/Ringo and I only discovered ‘Oh Ringo’ the other day, which murdered me. But yeah, I ship them all with each other and with other people, in infinite combinations, tbh.

Favorite movie starring/made by them?:

I haven’t rewatched the films since I became obsessed again, so that will be interesting. I have particularly fond memories of A Hard Day’s Night. In terms of films about them… Backbeat and Nowhere Boy (sorry, Paul!).

Do you believe in McLennon?:

1000%. It’s kind of the worst, because it’s like those ‘here’s some clues we’re going to scatter throughout that point to what’s really happening!’ fandom things that people seem convinced showrunners are doing but they probably aren’t, only about ten million times more obvious, and that is catnip to me. It’s just endless. I am trapped, and this was inevitable. I'm a historian by training so I'm primed for this shit.

General opinions on McLennon?:

lmao, just read my fic, especially the Paris-and-after ones, which is my attempt at what I really think happened. There’s more coming of that series and the dynamic will become clearer, though I think it changes through time and hopefully I can write some later stuff too.

If you got to change ONE thing about their history, what would it be and why?:

Hmmm. I feel I should say something about how it ended etc., but then unfortunately I love angst and drama tbh, so even though it tears me apart I couldn’t really do that, and it created some great songs too. I’d probably not have George get hit in the eye with a boiled sweet because that’s just mean. :( Why would anyone do that?? (It was probably one of the others, wasn’t it… Probably John, let's be honest.)

What song has the best vocals?:

It is clearly ‘If I Fell’, especially because Paul’s voice cracks on the high note in that recording. HATE IT.

What song do you feel had no effort put into it?:

‘I Don't Know (Oh Johnny, Johnny)’. lmao, very low effort, because it’s just a jam, but still perfect.

What is a well talked about moment in Beatles history you genuinely believe to be false?:

6th July 1957. I am a bit tinhat for the theory that John & Paul met earlier in some fashion and that for whatever reason they just fixed on that as a convenient time and place to tell the world. A future fic may address this further.

What is something you KNOW to be true, but often gets erased in their history?:

They're all funny, but George is actually the funniest. His quiet savagery knows no bounds and should never be underestimated.

Least favorite look from a Beatle(s):

Literally none because I love facial hair, so I am immune to most of the worst ones. Apart from maybe that one of Paul (with no facial hair) that I saw on here the other day, from the ‘80s, with short hair and it was awful. The ‘80s were a hellscape, may they never return.

Favorite look from a Beatle(s):

This specific picture, for all of them, goodbye:

[titconao3]

Writing Habits Tag!

tagged by: @beguilewritesstuff <3 I write: daily | most days | a few times a week | a few times a month | random

I write most often: when I first get up | later in the morning | afternoon | evening | the wee hours of the night | whenever it CAN happen whenever, but i’m very good at procrastination. Also i can spend a long time doing nothing, because i need to empty the brain, and that takes time.

In one sitting, I tend to write: a few sentences at a time | a few hundred words | a few thousand words | a complete chapter/section no matter how long | whatever comes probably an average of 1K, but sometimes it’s 300 over 2 hours and sometimes, but more rarely, it’s WHOA WTF

I tend to write scenes: in chronological order with no skipping | mostly in order but with some filler/skipping | whatever scene I feel like | who knows what’s gonna come out???? i tried writing out of order, but it’s not for me. i need to 1/ know where i’m at, and tweak past bits to make it all fit together better if i need to (one reason why i don’t publish WIPs), and 2/ if i’m getting to the “““good””” bits first then why would i bother writing the tough / boring / hard to decide bits? Besides, it’s writing the now that tells me what happens in the future. Generally speaking i know where i’m going, but the details, a particular twist, something that’s going to echo? yeah, those happen when i’m writing it (she’s wearing green sock and... holy shit socks. GREEN socks! Sudden Plot Tie-Up!!!!). i can’t even write a bit that’s fairly clear in my head (it happens, albeit rarely) because it will have been informed by all the previous bits so i’d have to rewrite it all on rereading /editing anyway.

The things that comes easiest to me are: dialogue | description of senses | description of action | description of characters | exposition | other No Idea At All. There are words, or there aren’t. They come, or they don’t.

I tend to write: on a phone | on a laptop | in a notebook | on whatever paper I can find | with speech to text | in the blood of my enemies | it doesn’t really matter to me | on paper first and then typed up | old school typewriter Wow, on a  *phone*... texting on a phone is annoying enough (stabbity stab with the fingers, autocorrect fucks what’s so far untouched by my stabbies), can’t imagine doing that. Typewriters are noisy. i guess i could try dictating but i’m more of a visual person, so while i’m curious about it i may not resort to it unless forced to. Also, i’ve tried to do that for short messages on a phone for ex and i tends to not recognize the language i speak in. And it’s annoying af!!11!1!1! Sometimes, the desktop (not mentioned in the list). i tried writing on paper in public transportation, but 1/ a woman sitting in front of me one went “- oooh writing? omg are you writing about meee? - no. - AHAHA i know writers take inspiration from what’s around them *winkwink* i know you’re writing about me!!!! - i’m looking at the sign outside to know where we are. - suuuuuure :))))) - *murder thoughts*” and 2/ rewriting. retyping everything? a G A i N !? Absolutely NO WAY. i’m not one of those who rewrite and re(re(re(re)))change everything with a zillion drafts; i’d get bored and just drop it all. i want to know what’s next, not rewrite ten times the same bits. i edit as i go;i type a thing, change it, reread the previous day’s words and tweak them, reread the entire fic so far and add / remove / edit a bit then.

When I take a break from writing, it usually lasts: a few days | a few weeks | a few months | it’s kind of random i feel guilty (there’s a deadline! i signed up for bang and the artist must be waiting for more words! i want this done! if i stop i’ll never start again!!) so i don’t stay away for long.

My favorite thing to do when I’m on a writing break is: recharge with other creative hobbies | read/consume other media | do something physical | catch up with old friends | work on my WIP in other ways like with playlists or art | other In general RL, basically. Work, tired, other things taking precedence, etc. i can take the opportunity to read (preferably not the same fandom or at least not the ship i’m writing).

I think my writing habits are: pretty much what I need them to be | okay, but I’m working on making them better | non-existent | not great :/ | I’m excited to develop them further | totally random | perfect for me :D i frankly don’t know what to answer. there is a lot of moaning and bemoaning.