#My stinky little gremlin

[buggyandthebartoclub]

BESTIE 😭😭😭😭 I AM BEGGING FOR SOMETHING SHACHI, I NEED HIM I WANT TO SMOOCH HIS STUPID FACE SO BAD 😭😭😭😭😭 can I has one (1) art of our mans PLEASE I am SOBBING 😭😭😭😭😭

I hope you're having a great day so far my bestie I love youuuuu smooch smooch !!!💖💖💖💖💖💋💋💋

I went bonkers when I saw this yesterday and blanked out and came to and had these so here’s FOUR versions of the same thing bc I could NOT decide which one to use 🫣 also you DESERVE IT AFTER THAT POST I LOVED JT WILL REACT AFTER POSTING I JUST COULD NOT STOP DRAWING THIS - anyway click for better quality - there’s an extra penguin doodle of him going seriously??? Two??? But my iPad died I’m so sorry *sobs*

[geraskierfanficprompts]

Prompt 107

"Darling" and "Dear" can be written away as him being gay, a bard, and british From Lettenhove, Geralt assures himself one late night, early into traveling with Jaskier. "Dearest" and "Dearheart" make sense. Geralt muses one late night, after a few years of traveling with Jaskier. Jaskier has said before that Geralt's his best friend, they travel together constantly, nearly all of Jaskier's songs are about him, it makes sense to mean this much. "Sweeting" "Honey" "Sweetheart" are confusing, and Geralt doesn't understand. It's been more years with Jaskier, and more and more names keep appearing, but these ones do nothing but confuse and vex him. Those are usually used for romantic partners, aren't they? Does Jaskier mean them in a teasing manner? "My love" Jaskier calls him this one night, and Geralt.... Geralt panics. He mumbles something stupid and practically books it into the woods to think. He worries for how it'd appear to poor Jaskier, but he can't help but need a few minutes to process it. Love? My love? Does Jaskier really see him so fondly?

If Geralt marches back there and snogs the life out of him, is it too soon?

[wraithsoutlaws]

before there was royce and dum dum there was simon and [redacted]

[silvandar]

Besties we're getting Qi Rong next week and I Am Excite

[yuriyuruandyuraart]

yuri yuri yuri

you are officially the victim of my kross au ideas so

have a peek on this one teehees!! look at my idea girl!! /silly

aaaaahh runs away

COME BACK and tell me MORE COWARD

[endless-brainrot]

blorbo bingo for mikey

HELLO THANK YOU

my screengleboingus <3

[cosmerelists]

Pros and Cons of Stormlight Characters in the Middle Seat Next to You on a Budget Airline.

As requested by anon. :)

1. Kaladin

Cons: His legs are so long. His hair is so luxurious. His shoulders are so broad. This large, beautiful man is not trying to be in your space, but the budget airline seat cannot contain him. Pros: You started what you thought was an idle conversation, but by the end of your flight, he had diagnosed your chronic pain and become your therapist??

2. Shallan

Pros: Well, she's more of a regular-sized human and she's friendly but quiet. She seems to just want to sketch the whole flight, so no complaints! Cons: Why does she keep staring directly at a space across the plane and sketching the creepiest symbol-headed creatures you've ever seen with her eyes vaguely glazed over like she doesn't even know she's doing it holy shit is this a Twilight Zone situation where there are invisible gremlin monsters on this plane that only she can see and is it your imagination or do you hear humming from somewhere

3. Adolin

Cons: Listen, this is a budget airline, and this guy seems to think it's a fancy spa?? He's got the slippers, the posh eye mask, the luxurious travel pillow, some really nice face creams, and he seems to be video chatting with a girl even though the internet on the plane doesn't even work. Frankly, you're jealous and grouchy about it. Pros: Okay, he actually seems really sweet and he gave you some of his way-too-nice-for-an-airplane snacks. You take it all back; this guy is awesome.

4. Szeth

Pros: He is so still. So quiet. Almost folded in on himself. Barely...breathing? Honestly, you keep forgetting the middle seat is occupied, and how rare is that! Cons: You just...you think you'd feel better if he just blinked. Just once. Please.

5. Lift

Cons: You had to sigh just a little when a little kid plopped down next to you. Also, she goes to the bathroom every five minutes, and comes back with food every time. You think she might be robbing people. Pros: She complimented your butt quite sincerely. You've always been kinda self-conscious about your butt! But apparently yours is the "second best she's ever seen." Feels nice.

6. Jasnah

Pros: Like, is it possible for someone to just be really good at flying? She came in, expertly stowed her luggage, sat down elegantly, did her seatbelt, used a wipe to clean up the tray table and surrounding area, and immediately starting reading some thick tome. Do you have a crush on her? You might have a crush on her. Cons: She glanced at the book you're reading, and you know she judged you for it.

7. Wit

Cons: Does this guy EVER stop talking? Pros: Okay, actually, you found him kind of annoying at first, but that story he told you about the temple and the duck might have healed years of trauma? Did you just realize that you don't have to forgive your mom and that's okay?

8. Renarin

Pros: He sat down and you were like, "Okay. Cute nerd. I dig it." Cons: You just wish he wouldn't scrawl foreboding-seeming numerals on the back of the airline chair in front of him. Is it counting down to...just before the plane lands? What does it mean???

9. Amarem

Cons: He came in and was IMMEDIATELY like, "I am taller than you and so I should have your seat." And then he just...waited? Like he thought you'd just comply??? Pros: He seems intent on pretending that never happened. Fine by you. That guy seems like an asshole.

10. Zahel

Pros: He falls asleep, like, immediately and doesn't stir for the entire flight. Cons: He's just kinda stinky.

11. Dalinar

Cons: He sits down and, unprompted, says something like, "In my youth I would always battle to occupy every armrest but now, after reading The Way of Planes, I have realized that it is the journey, not the armrests, that matter, so you can have them" and then you're like, "Dude, the person in the middle seat gets the armrests that's just common courtesy" and then he looks at you and you look at him and it's vaguely awkward the whole flight and nobody uses the armrests. Pros: Actually, after a while you do take the armrest and the tension goes down a lot.

12. Taravangian

Pros: He just kinda seems like a nice old man, you know? Kinda confused about stuff, but harmless enough. Cons: He falls asleep partway through and droops his head onto your shoulder and drools a bit and you know you sound ridiculous but it feels somehow calculated. Intentional. Evil.

13. Sebarial

Cons: The very second beverage service starts he's all, "Bring me a BOTTLE of wine" and you're like, "Oh no. It's one of those dudes who gets way too drunk on planes!" Pros: You know? This guy actually seems pretty jolly and chill. You catch yourself thinking, "I wish I could pretend he was my uncle." You're not sure where that came from.

14. Rock

Pros: He scoffs at the provided airline snacks and gets out this thermos and gives you the best damn soup you've ever had in your life. Cons: He's just a large, warm man. Very large. Very warm. Not his fault, of course, but now YOU are very warm.

15. Elhokar

Cons: Every time there is plane turbulence, he mutters something about how it's the assassins coming to finish the job. Poor dude must be really scared of flying. Pros: You feel a warm, parental feeling growing in you as you look at this sad, scared man. Maybe your mom was right. Maybe you WOULD be good with kids.

16. Eshonai

Pros: This lady is, just, SO excited to be traveling that it can't help but make YOU excited to travel. Like, you always thought plane travel sucked, especially budget airline travel, be she is so delighted by everything that you find yourself thinking, "You know, it IS pretty amazing that we're soaring through the sky right now traveling to a new land." Cons: Cons? No cons. You wish you could ALWAYS see flying through this woman's eyes.

[sagasolejma]

I really don't believe in gendered socialisation that much, or at least I don't believe it affects trans people the same way it does cis people BUT I will admit as a trans girl on hormones who is starting to get some noticeable visible changes, a part of me does sometimes feel like I'm some kind of weird gremlin creature who knows nothing about how to girl, who was then very suddenly shoved into a woman's body.

People will be like "omg you've worn a sports bra for more than three days??? Don't you know those get super sweaty and stinky easily and it's bad for your skin!!!!" and I'm just sitting there like no literally how would I even know that😭

Or like today I'm sitting in my chair kinda autistically scratching my nail polish like the little goblin I am, and one of my friends goes "no don't scratch your nail polish it'll look terrible, did your mom never teach you that???" and once again I'm just sitting there, feeling like a skin walker that was just exposed to society's expectations of what I'm supposed to already know about a gender I've been living as for like... 4 and a half months lol.

[evilminji]

Can You "Accidental Baby Acquisition" Yourself?

Like? Say you have a You... who is NOT You, obviously, but A You in the Multiversal sense... and their childhood suuuuuucked. Just? Truely awful for reasons beyond their control.

Such as the veil NOT being so easily peirced in their reality and humanity a bit more... Reactive(tm) to ectoplasm, due to the lower concentration of it in the Everything of their Universe. Which makes their parents research? Unattainable. Dangerous.

Ultimately fatal to their elder sister.

And then later, them.

Not that they were even the loving if wildly eccentric parents most of the other You's KNOW and have. Due to that very say research and their long-term exposure to their own samples. The Reactivity.

"Pit Rage" as some circles call it.

They weren't themselves. Stopped BEING themselves long before their children ever came into the picture. If they could think clearly, they would BEG for someone to save their children. From them. From their house of horrors. From what they've become.

And well? You exsist outside of Time. In the Zone. Maybe you have a wide and crazy adventure with this grizzled, worn, badass of a You. Figure he's pretty cool. Ask if he needs anything. And he laughs this broken glass in your chest sort of sound and says:

"Not unless you could give me a real childhood."

Like? Dude. Buddy. My buddy dude. Gonna have to explain that one. You can't just drop that and walk away. We Crazy Action Bros Adventure(tm) bonded. You can tell me. And reluctantly... he kinda does.

And... Look. You exsist outside of TIME. Your mentor IS Time. You can TOTALLY do that.

This.

But like? You realize... there wouldn't be TWO of you... right? If you take mini-Bamf out of the timestream at point A... you, big guy, stop existing at every instance of point B and onwards.

Yeah. Yeah, he gets that. Fully consents. His life was full of bad decisions and dramatic bullshit. He wants a real childhood. His sister back. Wants them BOTH out of that house and somewhere safe. If he could do it himself, he would. Call it his fucked up way of healing. Finally facing his trauma. It's haunted him long enough.

.....well then. Now You've got a baby and a fussy toddler. They have superpowers because of course they do. That house was OSHAs waking nightmares and deepest fever dreams. Jazzypants is hungy. And baby You did a stinky.

This is Fine(tm).

You're a King! You can TOTALLY handle this! Teeeeeemporarily. Since it's not like they can stay HERE. The Zone is literally uninhabitable long term for the living. So time to fire up the ol Brain Meats. Gremlin Ideas formulating. Loading... Loading... Loooooooading. Got it!

You kidnapped them.

Brilliant! FRIGHTY! Where's the Trenchcoat Booze Slu-...SLUHeuth. Sleuth! Totally what I was planning to say, Starshines! Don't curse. Cursing Bad~☆

The Detective Of Loose Morales in The Trenchcoat, who's Soul I Own, Frighty! Where's he at?? *Distant muffled answer* Close enough! Time to give him a heart attack! And throw a fight! Can you toss me a nightmare medallion? I need to instill mortal terror! Thaaaanks, Frighty! Also can you change diapers? *affirmative noises* Ancients, you're the best.

Smash cut to John Constantine. Busting up some cult, as you do. When? Oh fuck. The leaders heading for the store room! Not today, fucker! They fight. They struggle. It's Manly and Gritty and dramatic! When?

A terrible CRASH. Some artifact must have activated. What... have you DONE? *dramatic musical sting* swirling green and DEATH radiates out from a pin prick of nothing. A black hole in reverse. The cold oblivion of space, given bones to claw its way free. Eyes that sear in colors too technicolor and hypersaturated to be mortal. Green. Green! GREEN.

Ice and stars and death and a terrible, unspeakable Crown.

Two... two little sprogs. Tiny bits of nothing in a monsters hand. KIDS, wrapped up in something they never should of even had to nightmare about. John's eyes catch on red, red hair. A tiny little headband with butterflies on it. Pressed so close to dark locks, as she wraps herself around her little bits of a sibling.

The other ones dressed up in stars.

Someone SOLD their fuckin KIDS. Or this damned this STOLE them. It doesn't matter. Not now, not to John. Because this bastard isn't keeping them. He slides like breathing into the waves of luck and chance, odds and fate. Is on his feet and drawing attention. Whatever it takes, he's leaving here with those kids.

He laughs and it's not a kind one.

"Oi! A word if you will?"

@hypewinter @hdgnj @the-witchhunter @nerdpoe @ailithnight

[shares-a-vest]

@steddielovemonth Day 15: Love is... Co-Parenting (Prompt by... me! sorry-not-sorry for being self-indulgent)

wc: 1076 | Rated: T for swearing | cw: None

Tags: Steddie Dads (for my Joanie Munson AU), Valentine's Day Crafts, Co-Parenting Negotiation Tactics, Eddie Munson is a Menace, Steve Harrington Loves Eddie Munson

'Eddie vs. Valentine's Day Crafts'

Eddie splutters away, swatting at his face. He can see a speck of red glitter in his periphery, a remnant of his red glitter and heart-shaped confetti-filled afternoon. The offending shimmer is somewhere on his cheek and he needs to get rid of it this instant, or he is going to fucking scream.

He foolishly thought he had already removed all traces of Valentine’s Day crafts from his very being via what felt more like a decontamination scrub-down than a warm shower. Eddie grumbles, thinking about the monumental clean-up effort he endured right through to past dinnertime and his mind turns to the clothes hamper…

A job for Tomorrow Morning Steve, he smiles to himself, blinking and glitter free.

He holds out his hand for one final confirmation that the glitter has been vanquished once and for all.

Only he finds a little pink heart stuck to the middle of his goddamn palm.

“Fuck!” he curses, flailing on the bed and punching his fist into the sheets.

The mattress dips on the other side as a craft supply-free Steve finally joins him. The lucky bastard doesn’t know how good he has it!

“What’s wrong?” Steve chuckles.

Eddie rolls haphazardly onto his side, his legs tangling up in their bedding as he all but shoves his palm into his partner’s face.

“I take it all back,” he rants, “Our little girl is a complete gremlin. A stinky little bean who makes it her life’s mission to make a mess. Look!”

Steve grabs his wrist and moves it back at a (reasonable) distance, squinting without his glasses. He shrugs.

“Wonder where she gets it from?” he quips and Eddie all but yelps with frustration.

Steve gently curls up Eddie’s hand in his own and presses a kiss to his knuckles.

“I think we should drop her on Robin and Nance’s doorstep,” Eddie continues and scrunches his nose in every attempt to remain focused on complaining, even though his partner begins to massage his tense hand, “The glitter can be their problem. They love crafts!”

“I like my Valentine’s Day cards,” Steve says absentmindedly as he continues his ministrations, now rubbing at the skin typically covered by rings, “Made with love by my favourite munchkin...”

He leans over for a kiss when Eddie spots a red shimmer in his hair – an impossibility that causes him to throw himself onto Steve and dry-sob into his blue sleeping shirt.

“You know the trade-off,” Steve says, his hands moving to his hair with combing movements Eddie shouldn’t find so soothing right now, “I do Christmas crafts, you have Valentine’s Day and Halloween. I can’t help it if I’m better at containing glitter than you.”

Eddie pulls back and glares.

“Fuck you,” he spits with no real heat behind his words because Steve flashes a toothy grin and winks.

“Speaking of cards…” he purrs, taking his hand again and interlocking their fingers, “Where’s my naughty one?”

They both side-eye Steve’s pillow, a year’s old hiding spot for said obscene greeting cards, in unison.

Eddie yanks back his hand and slumps onto his own pillow, “Don’t know what you could possibly be referring to, Stevie.”

Their particular brand of Valentine’s Day celebrations can wait. He needs to renegotiate this whole co-parenting over holiday crafts thing…

“Think you do…” Steve coos, rolling on his side and shimmying closer, enough that he can press himself flush against Eddie’s side.

Eddie screws his eyes shut. It was cold today but of course, Steve runs hot. So hot that he thinks if they took their clothes off…

He can feel Steve’s breath against his ear as he continues, his voice dropping to a whisper, “The one where you say all the things you want to do to me…”

Eddie scrubs a hand over his face, gulping as his very limited willpower quickly crumbles away. He thinks he’ll do anything to get out of this arrangement by Halloween - or god forbid, whatever random celebration Joanie’s preschool conjures up next.

Funny Hat Day? Easter? Favourite Character Day? Impractical-For-Preschool Clothes Day? Make Your Parents Stay Up All Night In A Glitter-Induced Nightmare Realm As They All But Glue Themselves To The Goddman Kitchen Table-Day?

His eyes shoot open at the thought of possible years to come of this – his vision blurred by a small pale dot of paper sticking to his left lashes.

“God damn it!”

He swishes his hand in front of his face again – at least until Steve bats him away, leans in and delicately plucks the rogue heart off. Steve even has the sense to reach for a tissue on the nightstand and squish the paper inside a balled-up clump, hopefully locking it up for good.

“Here,” he offers, sliding his hand under Eddie’s pillow with ease to retrieve a comically large red envelope, “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

Steve pecks him on the cheek before quickly settling to rest his head on his chest.

“What are you doing?” he asks, dipping his neck to watch Steve snuggle in tight, eyes closed and looking a little bashful.

“Hiding,” he mumbles.

“Did you write me some sappy sonnet, my love?” he asks, tearing the envelope open and filling their quiet bedroom with an abrupt riiip.

“Just... some words,” Steve yawns, as Eddie frees the card and tosses the destroyed envelope onto the floor, “I don’t know, it probably sounds pathetic.”

“Not a chance,” Eddie says, giving the card a once over, his free hand finding its way into Steve’s impossibly soft and fruity-scented locks.

The card features two brown teddy bears, cuddling and cozy as they sit amongst a bed of rose petals. Above are floating glittering red hearts and the words, ‘To my Dearest Husband on Valentine’s Day’.

“Steve,” he sighs, opening the card to a message that spans the whole inside.

“I know you aren't my husband, not technically anyway,” Steve mumbles, peaking through one eye, “But I meant everything I wrote…”

His voice trails off, any grip he has around Eddie’s middle going lax.

“Love you, Steve,” he whispers, “G-get some sleep, hmm?”

Eddie falters in his words, overcome with love for the man wrapped around him (one who is rapidly approaching a state of sleep that leaves him snoring like a jackhammer) as he begins reading about just how much Steve loves walking through life hand-in-hand as they raise their daughter together, confetti hearts and glitter or not.

[loopyarts]

Here’s a sketchy drawing and a two panel comic that I did back in late January this year of an Au idea concept inspired by @crate-of-edges fic idea concept of them being turned into little kids with no memory of themselves as adults post and this is my Au idea and take on the concept idea of what if somehow Sanji brothers got cursed/de-age 10 years back to being 11-12 year old boys and now Sanji and Strawhats have to deal with them while also trying to find a way to reverse the curse/de-age effect inflicted upon them.

In this state, Sanji brothers are weaker because one they’re kids again and two their bodies can’t handle they own powers right now and they also seems to have a bit of memory loss at the moment but will regain them as time goes on. Yup, Sanji is basically having to babysit his brothers and play big brother to them, the only one that feels natural to him is Yonji because Yonji is his actual baby brother.

While with Ichiji, Sanji strangely finds that he starts to look after now as well and despite his age he acts like he’s 15-16 rather than a 11-12 year old boy although he does have his bratty and prideful moments and Sanji slowly starts to lose his mind whenever Ichiji decide to wonder off on his own or weirdly enough go fish diving.

Sanji feels like he has no idea what is going on in his older brother head and it doesn’t help that he also rarely talks which is fun but as time goes Ichiji began to open up more and more to Sanji to where he’s finds out that this Sanji is actually his little failure of a brother Sanji.

Niji is well Sanji living hell, an absolute brat of all brats. But as times go on Niji starts to respect Sanji and they both bond through kick combo training together and Sanji share some of his techniques to Niji to which the little gremlin absorbed like a sponge.

Also Niji a nightmare when it comes to food to point he refuses to eat what Sanji gives him, since he didn’t trust him yet. When Sanji does get Niji to try his dishes, he eats them up like no tomorrow and surprisingly asks for seconds. Niji also grows the closest to Sanji to where he wants to protect him and look after him just as much, that need to protect Sanji.

Which grew even more when he found out, this Sanji is his little brother Sanji.

Yonji is at first is very spoiled and entailed little chestnut, who acts like snot nosed brat to Sanji and constantly calls him stinky fish man. But Yonji bonded with Sanji the quickest and he loved that Sanji acknowledges his book-smarts and especially loves talking to Sanji friend Robin about the books and world, although he does get annoyed how Sanji treats like a little kid all the time.

When Yonji finds out, he not all that surprised by it but he surprised by how strong his big brother has gotten and is confused why they all tiny while he’s not.

After a while they found a cure for curse and let just say the brothers have had an experience while they still part ways. They surprised felt connected and didn’t let go of that experience they had together despite how odd it was for Sanji brothers to go through.

The comic kinda explains partly on how the boys got de aged. But to give a further more in depth rundown basically it takes place after Wano and they somehow encounter each other on another island before Egghead. The reasons the Sanji’s brothers are there is because they have a mission they carrying out which involves the person who cursed them to be 10 years younger. Who has been causing an uproar in town on the island due to their mending with age.

Basically they find her she kinda like a witch with feathered hat leak stick and has giant bag where she keeps her bottles and has the power to take memories and age take away or give age to a person and seal in a bottle.

Blah blah Sanji and his brothers start fighting and arguing giving her loads of time to quickly curse Sanji brothers and take away 10 years of age and memories away making them 11-12 year old kids again. Sanji was too shock to realise she escaped and went into hiding on another part of the island. Now Sanji is stuck looking after his de-age brothers along with strawhat crew and they now begin the journey of finding the age witch and reversing the curse done on his brothers.

Ichiji, Niji and Yonji basically got magic poofed into being kids again like an old fariytale. Also the time Witch thought it be funny because how childish they were all being and with how awful they being to Sanji, she decided to punish them and she hoping Sanji will give them a taste of they own medicine.

Also, Ichiji, Niji and Yonji will slowly regain parts of their memories as adults as they slowly put the pieces that this stranger is actually their twin brother Sanji. That’s all I got in my head for plot I basically was making it up as I draw the comics amd drawings for fun. OvO’

There a scene with Ichiji putting blanket on Sanji happens way later in the story in my head and it he also confirming to reader that he now knows that adult Sanji is his little brother and yes Ichiji will be first to figure it out because he a sharp cookie. Niji will figure it out last because he’s stubborn and take a bit longer to put two and two together. (Hint, hint I have a full oneshot comic based this idea that be posted soon hopefully. OvO’)

Oh I almost forgot to mention in my mind and headcanons Ichiji powers can hurt him outside of the raid suit. So if he uses his sparks as a child he will hurt himself despite not being as powerful he can still inflict damage onto himself. Also my version of Niji has low vision and cannot see very well without his goggles.

Anyway, that’s all my rambling on this idea. I will probably won’t do much more with this Au idea after I have finished doing that oneshot comic.

[a-bit-too-silly]

Would you maybe do a drabble about regressed Logan being fussy about having to take a bath, maybe with CG Wade?

of course! I decided to have a bit of an inconsistent narrator cus Wade talks right to the reader sometimes. Hope this is alright! :]

🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧

If there's one thing Logan *isn't* known for, it's his cleanliness. He takes care of himself most of the time. He's half good at that don't get this twisted, dear reader. But.. well, he's not particularly neat. We'll put it that way.

When he's big he's always getting covered in sweat, grime, blood, ash, he's really the type to roll around in mud like a dog if he thinks it'll make him feel better. 'Feral' is a good word to describe him, even when he's not gone into one of his berserker rages. But when he's little, it's.. yeah, it's the same story. Maybe a bit less blood and no ash since I wouldn't- ehh... *nobody* would let that little guy smoke anything. Not even his beloved cigars. Thankfully he's found some other ways to satiate that oral fixation of his, even if it does mean the occasional bite on the arm every now and then.

Regardless of what he decides to sink those little chompers into, he still manages to get himself coated in just about everything he comes across.

Mud? Oh-ho, definitely. No use in putting him in his raincoat and boots since he'd prefer to stomp around in every puddle barefoot anyway.

Food? You know it. You could be feeding him as neatly as possible only to turn your back for a moment and find some mashed avocado in his eyebrow.

Dust from the floor? Yep. Paint? Sure. Crayons? Somehow, yeah. Blue fur from Kurt? Mhm. Don't get me started on the jam incident. That sweet honey badger found his way into the cabinets.. the evidence of that massacre still stains those poor porous countertops.

I'll hand it to him, he's talented.

Unfortunately... bath time is his worst enemy. Maybe it has something to do with the experimentation, that'd make the most sense. Maybe it's his tendency to sink. Maybe he just prefers to be a stinky little gremlin. It's not exactly my place to ask. He's often too little or too tired to stay standing long enough for a shower, and sponge baths aren't really an option.

With background info out of the way, let's get back to the problem at hand.

-

"Cmon peanut, I made sure to put in the bubbles you like! They're yellow!" Wade says with a small gesture towards the tub. "Al! Tell him they're yellow!"

"You really think I'd be more convincing than you?" She calls from the other room almost incredulously. - oh, right. *Blind* Al.. yeah.. maybe not the best at identifying colors. - Wade looks out the door of the bathroom in the general direction of where Al is seated, minding her business.

"See? Al likes how yellow they are." He says in spite of everything, "Do you want to get in the tub now, munchkin?"

"no. No bat-time." Logan, as little as he is right now, scowls. It doesn't have the intended effect, but Wade lets out a dramatic groan anyway. Toddlers.. can't be reasoned with.

"Unfortunately not how this works, kiddo." Wade says, crouching down next to the tub where Logan has firmly planted himself against the tile. He's no longer wearing his top, seeing as it was an unfortunate bystander to some sticky pancakes and cubed meats. All chopped up nice and small so Logan wouldn't choke but big enough that he could chew on em a decent bit.

"Don' need ta." The adamantium boned toddler huffs in response, "'m not dirty."

"no, but you are sticky, kiddo. And you were playing outside with Storm earlier so I bet you got a bit icky there too." This only makes Logan's scowl firmer. The once little pout growing in such a way that makes Wade's heart ache. If it weren't for the fact that Al would definitely nag him about Logan's sticky fingers, face, chest, shoulders... Logan's general *stickiness*, he doubts he'd ever manage to get the rascal to ever bathe.

"Papa get in first." He said firmly, pointing to the tub like he's the one calling the shots. Which he is. Wade is a weak weak man for his grumpy little guy. "'n no dunking."

'Dunking' in this case stands for dipping the little guy's head under water. Wade would never, but it gets mentioned at least once per bath time. Upon hearing the statement, Wade throws up his hand in a solemn oath.

"Scouts honor." Now, Wade has never been a boy scout, but he's also never been one for hurting kids so the promise still stands. With that, he slips out of his slippers and rolls his sweatpants up to his knees so he hopefully won't get too soaked, and he sits down on the edge of the tub. The water in the tub isn't too deep, only reaching up to around the middle of Wade's calf, with another few inches on top of thick yellowy foam from the bath bomb Logan relished in watching dissolve.

Still reluctant, Logan watches as Wade sits on the edge of the tub for a while. And Wade lets him. It's a slow process, always is, but after a few minutes of pouty glaring Logan tugs off the last of his clothes then clambers up into the tub with a bit of help from Wade. Just to ensure he doesn't slip. The water is still nicely warm despite the slow process, maintained by frequent touchups of hot water and lifting up the plug to let out the cold.

"Good job, peanut." Wade says softly as he grabs an old cup, bright red in color and decorated with a variety of stickers, and starts to ladle water over Logan's shoulders. He's learned the hard way that Logan has the 'if my head gets wet in a dry room I will shake until it's dry' reflex, so hair washing stays until the end.

Logan is quiet and stiff, letting out the occasional whine despite himself. Seems he's on the silent treatment side of the spectrum rather than the 'giving a cat a bath' side. It's almost worse, but Wade knows he'll perk back up once things are done.

So he starts to gently scrub the sticky syrup and dirt from Logan's hands, meeting his eye as best he can. His little one is sulking, lip still pouted out, eyes downcast and sad.

"Bath time is no fun, I know, my sour faced friend." Wade sighs, "anything that could make it better, bubbie?"

Logan stays quiet for a while, only moving when Wade needs to reach somewhere to clean. "No."

"mmm." Wade mumbles, taking the removable showerhead off of its holder so he can quickly rinse off Logan, getting his hair and rinsing off the soap. "Just a moment.."

"done?"

"Yep. All done, honeybun." He says as he stands up to grab a towel from the shelf, that earns him some grabby hands and a desperate search for 'uppies'. Which he gladly satisfies after bundling him up in a towel. Yeah, I can pick him up. Adamantium skeletoned 300+ pound toddler? No biggie. "Let's get you in some jammies and maybe you can convince Nana Al to let you put on a movie. That sound good, bubsicle?"

Logan nestles his head into the crook of Wade's neck and nods a little, his limbs clinging to Wade like a koala clings to a tree. He's really not used to being picked up, regardless of how much he asks for it.

"And then Papa pool is gonna make some chicken nuggets and fries and we're gonna forget all about that icky horrible bath." Wade continues as he carries Logan to the bedroom, patting his back occasionally.

"Dino shapes?" Logan asks quietly.

"Oh, definitely. That makes em more nutritious." Wade scoffs, pulling out a pair of comfortable flannel pants and a T-shirt that still manages to be baggy even on Logan's broad frame. The faded pattern still clearly reads 'Bambi' with the titular character looking up at a butterfly while sitting in a bed of flowers. It's a favorite of his, and maybe Wade has been messing with continuity to make sure it never wears out. Maybe. Come on, every one needs their recognizable outfits!

Logan dresses himself with only a touch of help with the socks. Then he does that silly toddler walk, the one where its more stomps than normal footfalls, off towards Al with Wade following close behind.

[incorrect-riordanverse]

Riordanverse Characters as quotes by people i know have said

dedicated to @lord-of-pterodactyls, i know you asked for friends in particular but i’m broadening it as even people i consider my nemeses (old ass philosophy teacher) are funny

Percy: i truly feel as if nothing will ever incapsulate my being as truly as the singing monsters water wubbox

Annabeth: *screaming from adjoining room* GET LOST APPLE MUSIC PRIVACY

Piper: *in bikini* i don’t like people with big boobs

Jason: *trying to compliment piper* your hair looks like dementia

Leo: *emerging from the stinky depths of his room after being in there for 16 hours straight and no showers with clothes from 5 days ago, red scabs all over his body and lips so dry it looks like a snake shedding its old skin by how crusty it is* guys on a scale from 1 to 10 how sexy do i look rn?

Hazel: *yeets her foot out and jiggles her toes menacingly at people she dislikes as an intimidation tactic because her toes are particularly hideous*

Frank: *after literally being targeted by a racial ‘joke’* worse than that, you white people eat spam

Grover: *pats air purifier* a good trusted friend

Nico: *drifts into hazel’s room* bro i ain’t even gonna lie, the holidays are better than the black plague *leaves room before she can question him further*

Reyna: *sleeptalking* stallion le meghan

Rachel: *pretending her coloured markers are vapes*

Thalia: *pointing at luke* my bro be the victim and the perpetrator

Tyson: *when talking about doing math* all i have are my fingers and a dream

Clarisse: *sees a sick person in bed* you’re looking pretty vulnerable *proceeds to ransack their room and steal their sheets like some gremlin*

Octavian: i am THE riddler *speaks in riddler voice and puts on devious little expression* what is... a curtain?

Will: *sees a dying person and looks pointedly at nico* and thats because they didnt take their cenovis vitamin c

Luke: i am constantly one snap away from either committing homicide or suicide

Apollo: *feeling face after new skincare routine* gosh my face feels as soft as a silicone tit

Meg: *pointing at apollo after redemption arc* YOU WON’T GO TO HEAVEN BECAUSE YOU ARE A COMMUNIST!

Magnus: *eating falafel* this is an orgasmic experience

Samirah: *substituting random words in english for arabic and not realising no one understands what she’s saying*

Alex: *laughing at the death threats she gets online after posting a meme about BTS in the military*

Blitz: *does something naughty* omg sorry im such a libra（＾ν＾）

Hearth: *walks into room* god is dead.

Carter: *walking into sadie’s room visibly upset with a box of cadbury favourites* here take them. if you don’t im going to eat them all. please, dont make me do this

Sadie: take a shit and be late to school or dont take the shit and be on time hell loop

Zia: my top artist on spotify this year will be xi jinping’s wife

Walt: *simply, appreciatively and completely without context* yeah, buddha is a pretty amazing guy

Anubis: i dislike being emo because i can only go as death note characters for halloween

Bast: *absolutely entranced by watching love island uk and is just repeating everything any person says back in a treacherous essex accent*

Bes: *walking into classroom full of young teens with an oversized ‘free james assange’ shirt* today i am a nice, trendy leftist. tomorrow, who knows?

[vanninipanini]

GOD MY DUNMESHI AND DMC ART PIECES ARE BLOWING UP - WHY ARE DOING SO WELL HERE THAN ON TWITTER 🪦✨

✨COUGH✨

Anyway

This is FUFU !

A lesser god that likes to play jokes and be a stinky little gremlin to the other gods ! He’s a bit of a hassle to deal with-

I’d love to get some comments on how to set up his personality n stuff about him, MAYBE A WNA ACTUALLY ID LOVE TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT PLZZZZ !!!!

[pjoxreader]

can I request a jason/annabeth/piper x reader with a cat that loves the reader but hates them? Idk I think it would be funny

Reader’s Cat Hates Them

Jason Grace

-He wants them to like him so badly. He has no idea what he’s doing wrong and honestly it’s both funny and sad.

-”There, see, we can get along well!” Jason says proudly as he lets your cat eat the treat from his hand. Before you could warn him they swipe at him once the treat was gone. -You have to try very hard to not laugh seeing the utter look of betrayal on his face. Please patch up his scratched hand and broken heart.

- At this point he has more books on cats than you do, he gets so proud when he recognizes cat behaviors. 

-”If they slow blink that means they’re comfortable around you.” he whispers excitedly, only for your cat to go airplane ears and stare Jason down. “That means they’re nervous.” he sighs in disappointment.

-He refuses to move in with you until your cat likes him, so he’s been trying everything at this point. When your cat finally does decide to sit down in Jason’s lap during a movie night you both end up crying in relief as Jason was finally approved. 

Piper Mclean

-She doesn’t mind honestly, she has fun teasing your cat in return too. “A stinky gremlin. Little gremlin baby.” airplane ears activated. 

-They both kind of just live with each other not really minding the other. Your cat has acted like an assassin one or two times trying to go for her ankles. 

-You had gone to check on her after hearing a thud only to see her face down on the floor, stomach arched as your cat went scurrying out. “He tripped you huh?” You say trying your best to not laugh.

-”Should have body slammed him.” Piper complains, rubbing her nose in pain. Of course you knew she’d never do it but the idea does make you laugh. 

-She does end up forming a soft spot for your cat after he end up cuddling into her lap when you two were getting ready for bed. 

-”I knew he’d come around.” you say, contently leaning over and kissing her cheek as you get into bed with them.

Annabeth Chase

-She would 100% have a Katniss and Buttercup relationship with your cat. She honestly wasn't the biggest fan of them at the start, but was content with leaving her alone, as long as she left her alone. -Of course that became difficult when Annabeth moved in with you. Honestly the staredowns between the two could get intense. At this point you were sure they were having a staredown at least once every day.

-You were nervous about leaving the two of them alone since you had to go out of town to visit your family. “I left a list of everything she needs and the times you feed her.” Annabeth huffs fondly at that, gently kisses you. ”We’ll be fine. Go enjoy your time.” With Annabeth’s reassurance you hesitantly make your way out with that.  

-You should have known she was right because it only took about three days into your trip for you to get a video of Annabeth playing with your cat. Normally she’d turn her nose up at Annabeth’s attempt to bond.

-When you finally return home you find the two of them cuddled up on the sofa, Annabeth reading a book. She smiles when she hears the door open. “Look at you two! Getting along all of sudden.” you tease but honestly you were a bit jealous too. 

-”Seems like we both missed you.” she says lovingly pulling you into a kiss to show just how much she missed you.

~Masterlist & Rules~

Like my writing? Please consider sending me a Ko-fi! ☕

[guzhufuren]

tags you get when you post a Chay gifset: #my precious boy! 🥺🥰 #i will fight the world for him <3 #little angel who melts the iciest of hearts #living ray of sunshine too good for this world too pure

tags you get when you post a Kim gifset: #nasty little man #feral cat #i love this loser #my love/nuisance #i hate him fr fr #my beloathed #stinky cringefail gremlin boy